>>36303972

Yuma shakes her head. "It doesn't work that way, Warmaster. One by one or in a group, that's my capacity. Five is already pushing my limits, and six is impossible without assistance."

...Fine. You'll have to take what you can get.

Last question, then. Is she really up to--

"I apologize if I speak out of turn," Your Culexus barks now, cutting you off. "But I AM up to the task, Warmaster. I've been inactive long enough, and bed rest is something that all Culexus actively try not to waste too much time with." The gloved hand at her throat now forms a fist at her chestplate, in an archaic salute. "I am here to serve. I am here to do my duty."

Kyoko grins at you, optimism incarnate. "You heard the kid, Murderface. She'll be fine, no need to nag her about it."

You frown at the red-haired Eversor. You just wanted to be sure, that's all. The last thing you want is the Officio's last remaining Culexus crumbling to ash in her suit because you didn't give her a chance to take a fucking breather--

"Nah. Yuma-chan can take it. Kid's tough - probably tougher than you." Your best friend's grin widens as she gives her spear a lazy one-handed twirl, the angular blade gleaming as it catches the overhead lights. "In fact, every Culexus that went through Malal's Culexus training turned out to be legitimate hardasses, every single one - an' Yuma-chan's no exception. She just kinda gets difficult from time to time, but that's youth for ya."

You nod in agreement. Yeah, you can understand that. Youths.

"...I'm right here, you know," Yuma's somber, determined tone is briefly replaced with a plaintive one. "Warmaster, Miss Kyoko, I appreciate your concern, but--"

"Yeah, yeah. We know you can hack it. We get it."

"Murderface is just scared you'll teleport her into a dimension where there's no whisky or pancakes, that's all." Sayaka cuts in, and this diffuses the tension somewhat - the unexpected joke causing smiles and chuckles from all over.

[1/2]

>>36303987

Only somewhat, though. It's still there, palpable, a stretched-taut sensation hanging in the air.

This is a dangerous operation, and not everyone might make it back alive.

"Alright, let's settle down, everyone." Mami claps both her hands, her voice of warm honey a clear and almost shocking contrast from the rough-edged voices that had filled the room earlier with growls, grumbling and cackling. "Can I have your attention for a moment? Good. Midori-san, please go ahead and distribute the teleportation beacons. Everyone, please take one."

At this apparent signal, it's here that Midori also walks forward, holding what looks like a metal tray full of bulky black wristwatches. You also note that Mami is already wearing one on her wrist, its face glowing a soft amber.

"These are the teleportation beacons we'll be using for today's operation. This is for a one-way trip back." She points to the glowing dial.

"To activate its functions, simply press down on the watch face for three full seconds. Three seconds, that's all. This'll give Yuma-san a signal for her to easily lock onto, and pull you back into reality with our teleporter. If you change your mind, simply press down once, and that should deactivate it. That's it!" Mami smiles. "Just make sure it has a snug, secure fit around your wrist, and we're golden!"

...Right. Three seconds. You take one of the bulky things from the tray, and cinch it around your wrist, the catch locking solidly into place. The watch dial immediately glowing a bright purple, before darkening into a rather disconcerting black.

"Is everyone ready, then?" The blonde Magical Girl calls again after a few minutes. "Please give your gear and supplies a last-minute check before we proceed. Opportunities for on-field resupply will be a bit of a forlorn hope in this operation at best. Succeed or fail, we'll only have one shot at this--"

[2/3]

>>36304010

"COMING THROUGH! MISAKA IS COMING THROUGH!" The doors to Kyuubey's Office slides open, and all inside turn to look at a short, grease-blackened phantasm stride its way into the office proper - leaving behind a rather cheeky trail of dripping motor oil. "SPECIAL DELIVERY TO BIG SISTER MURDERFACE! CANNOT BE STOPPED!"

Wait. That's...Misaka? You blink as the filthy creature spots you, and it's with a squeal of joy that it immediately runs full-tilt at your direction. Managing to avoid tripping itself up on its own slippery feet. When it finally stops in front of you, it's here that you recognize your surrogate little sister underneath what looks like layers of dried oil, grease and engine lubricant.

How did she get so filthy...?

"Big Sister Murderface! Ran all the way here! Misaka is done!" The grime-encrusted russian beams up at you. "Tiny Pete is locked and loaded with Mystery Loadout! Teleporter Beacon is here!" She thrusts what feels like a thick metal coin, hastily wrapped in a ball of tissue paper, into your hands. "Misaka worked hard! Misaka worked really, really hard!" A pause. "W-well, maybe Ashford and Stupid Robot Girl helped a tiny bit again, but there!"

Ahh, so that's why. You shake your head, shoving the Beacon into your Inventory, noting that Misaka was considerate enough to make sure that the device got to you in a pristine state - even going so far as to ball it up in tissue. That's....well, that's youth for you.

"Graaaah, Misaka will get clean later! Go away!" Misaka hisses at Sayaka's reaching hands, one of them already clutching what appears to be a fistful of moistened baby wipes. She looks back up at you again, expectant, hopeful. "Did Misaka do a good job, Big Sister Murderface?"

Of course she did a good job, you tell her, patting her grimy hair for good measure, making the small russian blush with joy and pride.

[3/4]

>>36304020

"Ahahaha! Misaka does her best!" Your surrogate little sister giggles, both hands clutching at her cheeks. "Only for Big Sister Murderface!"

...Well, looks like you're set, then. Muramasa sheathed at your hip, the Desert Eagle in your shoulder holster and Tiny Pete's teleportation beacon in your inventory. You can't be more prepared.

This thing going to happen, or what?

"As soon as everyone else is ready." Mami smiles. "Is everyone, then?" She calls out, and the rest of your Kill-Team responds in agreement. Your voice joining theirs in chorus.

"Well, then." The blonde nods at you, her smile widening the slightest bit. "This is your operation, Warmaster. Any final words before this operation finally begins?"

You feel the eyes of everyone in the room focus upon you as she says those words - just as the Shield on your arm starts to click. Slowly, faintly, barely loud enough to hear, but there.

How do you react?

[]Let's get this done, everyone. Be careful, and good hunting.
[]One way or another, we're coming back with our main objective. Everything else, you have my permission to kill.
[]Other. (Write-in)

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>>36304053
>[X]One way or another, we're coming back with our main objective. Everything else, you have my permission to kill.

>>36304053
>[]One way or another, we're coming back with our main objective. Everything else, you have my permission to kill.

>>36304053
>[]One way or another, we're coming back with our main objective. Everything else, you have my permission to kill.

Let the blood flow never stop!!

>>36304053
[x]Other. (Write-in)
"It's not over till it's over. Don't let your guard down till we're all back here; make sure you come out of this alive, and that's an order."

>>36304053
>[X]One way or another, we're coming back with our main objective. Everything else, you have my permission to kill.

>>36304053
>[x]Let's get this done, everyone. Be careful, and good hunting.

Permission to kill is already the assumption.

>[] if we're not back in 5, don't touch my kong

>>36304053
>[x]One way or another, we're coming back with our main objective. Everything else, you have my permission to kill.

SENMETSU DA

>>36304053
>[X]One way or another, we're coming back with our main objective. Everything else, you have my permission to kill.

>>36304053
>[X]One way or another, we're coming back with our main objective. Everything else, you have my permission to kill.

>>36304053
>[]Other. (Write-in)
I swear to whatever gods are listening, If you die, I'll kill you.

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>>36304053
>[x]One way or another, we're coming back with our main objective. Everything else, you have my permission to kill.
SCOURGE AND PURGE!

>>36304053
>[x]Other. (Write-in)

"If I die, whoever's still alive gets my stuff."

>>36304053
[X]Let's get this done, everyone. Be careful and good hunting.

>>36304164
Does that imply "including Midori"?

>>36304053
>[X]One way or another, we're coming back with our main objective. Everything else, you have my permission to kill.

I've got a baaaad feeling about this.

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>>36304010
>Mami smiles. "Just make sure it has a snug, secure fit around your wrist, and we're golden!"

>>36304053
>[x]Let's get this done, everyone. Be careful, and good hunting.

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>>36304053

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>>36304201

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>>36303972
>Akashic Realm
>>36303987
>>36304010
>>36304020
>>36304053
Good luck, everyone.

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>>36304253
>>36304281
mumi is totally trustworthy as long as she's speaking in red

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>>36304253
Trusting the Mumi is how megucas get killed.

>>36304281
Stay safe alcoholism ghost

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Also posting this for anyone not on twitter.

magical girls are gay, and people who watch magical girl shows are gayer from the back blast

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>>36304281

>>36304331
Then how did Kharn get pregnant?

>>36304342
genderbending

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>>36304281

>>36304342
How is Meguka formed
How Meguka get pragnet
They need to do way in stain incubator
Who kill their Meguka

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>>36304281
thank mr skeltal

>>36304342
I think if it's futa it counts as gay no matter what.

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>>36304281
Also, godspeed you magnificent Danster.

>>36304349
Kharns witch-Gina just bit off one of soujis nuts and took it from there

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>>36304281

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>>36304281

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>>36304281

>>36304375
It's futa! Futa!
Fun for girls and boys!
It's futa! Futa!
It's not straight or gay it's both!

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>>36304375
>>36304281
WENDY COOLDOWN PLEASES 8BALL FOR MURDERFACE DOLLS

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Threadly reminder that the updated eBook can be found at http://pastebin.com/kbGzcbDb
link to the Fanart gallery: http://wiki.magicalgirlnoir.com/index.php/Fanart
link to the journal pastebin: http://pastebin.com/SZkxPycM

>>36304281
I wish I could post lewder and not get banned.

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>>36304053
>[]One way or another, we're coming back with our main objective. Everything else, you have my permission to kill.
Search and Destroy.

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>>36304370
>How Meguka get pragnet

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>>36304281

>>36304421
Nooo my secret shaaame

>>36304010
>To activate its functions, simply press down on the watch face for three full seconds. Three seconds, that's all.
Remember: no teleporting out inside a timestop.

>Mami says were golden
>Mami had golden hair
>Mami makes golden pancakes

Threadly reminder that Mami is the devil and not to trust her lies.

>>36304437
who gets the preggers?

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>>36304470
>Mami is the devil
No, Anon, we are the devil.

>>36304459
That would probably be a bad idea anyway. Pinkie might show up in the real world wherever we've teleported to.

>>36304470
no homura is the devil

>>36304470
>Mami
>Anything but perfect
Eat shit, Anon. Fall off your horse.

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Do what you must, deculture has already won.

>>36304479
PinkyxDevil when?

>>36304490
>Mami
>not shit
I have a bridge I'd like to sell you anon.

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You guys are gonna get fucked over by Mami soooo hard.

Can't wait for the tears.

>>36304503
We already got a kiss from pinkie.

We need to give her grief seed a lick.

>>36304508
>You guys are gonna get fucked by Mami soooo hard.
FTFY

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>>36304508
Of course we will, but we'll take it with a smile.

>>36304482
Homura isn't the devil because Homura did nothing wrong. Unlike Mami being queen shit of betrayal land.

>>36304568
>literally raping a goddess into insanity
>not wrong

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>>36304076
>>36304081
>>36304098
>>36304132
>>36304145
>>36304148
>>36304149
>>36304157
>>36304195
>you have my permission to kill.

Gee I wonder if slaughtering 100 magical girls this time around is also part of some ritual that may make things go tits up just like the last time we slaughtered 100 of them.

Surely this will not empower Ahriman again like it did in the past, right?
Surely nothing can go wrong this time, right?

>>36304575
There is nothing wrong with raping a goddess into insanity.

>>36304587
We have to give them the murderface experience or we'll turn into a watch-wearing dildo.

This time we'll kill Ahriman by going straight for the soul gem.

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>>36304281

>>36304620
>This time we'll kill Ahriman by going straight for the soul gem.
Great idea!
...Except her host is Oriko.
A civilian that has no Soul Gem.

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>>36304281
Have a cute blonde

>>36304646
Since when is licking soulgem lethal ?

>>36304646
I have faith in Chiaki's murder skills. If all else fails, we can teleport everyone else to safety and go all THE FLESH OF FALLEN ANGELS.

>>36304646
She does presumably have a soul, though. A Meguca soul gem is merely a physical manifestation of a metaphysical trait.

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>>36304281

>>36304669
It killed our relationship with Iori

>>36304673
>timestop
>summon Pinkie
>bribe her with Mami's pancakes to eat Ahriman's soul
>Pinkie forces a slobbery, bloody kiss with Kharn levels of tongue on us

>>36304010
>Just make sure it has a snug, secure fit around your wrist, and we're golden
>and we're golden
>golden
>GOLDEN

OH FUCK

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>>36304670
You are the biggest idiot.
I really hope anon listens to you. The amount of fuck ups, deaths, and SHADOWRUNS that'll result will be hilarious. I cannot wait.

>>36304700
Stop it, Midorable, I don't want to get turned on at work

>>36304700
>It killed our relationship with Iori
Nah, our relationship with Iori was killed by telling her to keep her distance. Repeatedly.

>>36304702
Eh, it's fine. We know we need to be first in and last out anyway.

We just need to ditch the watch at some point and slaughter our way out of a different Akashic point.

>>36304700
Can hardly kill what is already dead.

>>36304700
>It killed our relationship with Iori
To be fair we got a better conquest out of the deal, and we literally only lost Iori to a bunch of mad as hell anti waifufags.

>>36304720
>browsing 4chan at work
PROMOTIONS!

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>>36304281
Thank you, Warmaster!

>>36304724
>slaughter out of the akashic point
>end up somewhere on the moon wondering for months until we accidently end up by the first officio
>nobody knows how the shit we ended up on the moon
>everythings gone to hell without us there to look after things.

>>36304727
We need to get Iori a broadsword.
So she'll be a broad in a noir novel with a sword.
A broadsword

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>>36304761
i like you

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>>36304281
Here, have a blonde with golden gun.

>>36304761
...Eh, 2/10. Take Attarou's seminar on puns and come back better than before.

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>>36304761
Forgot image of a cute idol

as dangerous as this plan is, I can't help but feel it is exactly right.

So when is Murderface gonna take the D?

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>>36304761
Okay I giggled.

>>36304854
The only reason she'd pick one up would be to impregnate Midori , Wendy and Pinky with it...

>>36304882
>implying Pinky wouldn't impregnate us

>>36304882
I bet pinky could make a mother out of us.

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>>36304882
>That spoiler.

I approve of this post.

>>36304854
In the MGNQ Doujinshi special.

>>36304882
Actually, all that's needed is Incubator science to impregnate them.
...or a potion of dickgirl, but we'd have to go to the 13th for that.

>>36304882
Don't forget the rest of the Officio

>>36304900
>>36304898
Next time stop demand Pinky give is a child and then force her to make an honest woman out of us. 9 months later we brith the child that will end the world. it's Mami and we send her to the past

>>36304924
I bet that's what Kharn used when she put Souji in his place.

>>36304928
We're not Kharn. Impregnating an insane witch-god is one thing, but we're not going to sleep with the entire Officio and laminate their panties.

>>36304928
>residue from the Akashik Realm overdrives The Hat

>>36304960
Who said anything about laminating them? We will build a fort in our office.

>>36304932
For such assets, she would impregnate Midori, not us.

>>36304932
>[sopiler]send her to the past[/soiler]
And undo the future that is Homu!

>>36304960
>implying we wouldn't take Pinky's monster dong
>implying we wouldn't carry those children's
>implying we wouldn't raise our little family in the post-apocalyptic waste of earth
>implying we wouldn't take half the akashic realm in the enviro table divorce

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>>36304976
Still like this picture.

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RIGHT! Cut this out before this thread gets moved over to /d/!

>>36304976
FOOOOOLLLISH SAMURAI ME-GU-KAAaaa.

>>36304976
But the Homu refused to change.

>>36305019
You cannot undo HoMu. HoMu is eternal. I'll be back Samuraiiiii. You'll seeee

>>36305015
Lookit this scrub, not being down with the Pinky D.

>>36304944
This begs a question... Have Kharn and Fran ever formally met as Warmaster and Chief Director ?
Because, you know, Fran sorta happens to be a blonde.

>>36305015
This is not a forum you stupid fuck

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>>36304976
The homunator?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y8DekFFCE5c

>>36305015
Relax, it's just iddle rambling. It's not something Decu would actually follow through with... right?

RIGHT?

>>36305113
Oh Homura! My soul gem is moving on its own!

>>36305113
Ahahah !

>>36305096
That... is a disturbingly good crossover.

>>36305113
Nah he has something worse planned.

>>36305200
>crossover
>good

Please.

>>36305266
>complaining about crossovers in a crossover quest

Due to Homurator drinking a strange potion of gender swap the show now becomes a crossdressing crossover with star crossed lovers crossing the universe

>>36305113
The 13th's dickgirl formula is canon. It's on his Ask.fm somewhere.
Incubator science babies is somewhere on Wendy's.

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>>36305266
do you know where you are

>>36305290
>>36305317
I stand by my statement.

>>36305317
Rarely has this response been used more apropriately than right here right now.

>>36305304
>tfw you will never be the scabbard to Sayaka's sword and take her to the hilt while Kyoko's spear shaft explores your rear soul gem.

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>>36305348
>tfw

Is Decu kill?

>>36305348

Swallowing the Murasama seems like a bad idea, anon. Also, why would you stab ourselves with Kyouko's spear? Wouldn't that kill you?

>>36305400
But Sayaka's sword is Blueberry cheesecake, and she's been know to finish rather explosively inside people with it.

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>>36305096
>>36304310
A time-traveling non-human travels back in time to protect a kid from making a terrible mistake and getting killed by another non-human.

Sounds familiar?

>>36305390
Why is Kyoubro so best?

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>>36305400
We were discussing penises.

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>>36305487
Because Mumi merlin'd her a dick.

>>36305531
But that's Homu, Anon

>>36304076 >>36304081 >>36304098

You look at the faces of each member of your Kill-Team, one by one. "One way or another, we're coming back with our main objective." You say clearly, loudly, your voice echoing in the brief silence of the cavernous Incubator's Office.

Your gaze briefly stopping at Midori, who flashes you a smile and a thumbs-up. You nod at her, and turn back to Mami, meeting her warm amber eyes with your own.

"Everything else, you have my permission to kill."

"Well said!" Your blonde goddess of victory smiles, clapping briefly, before turning to your Incubator and the Culexus standing beside him. "Then, Kyuubey-san, Yuma-san?"

Kyuubey nods and taps something on his desk's keyboard, just as Yuma herself touches a gloved hand to the side of her helmet. The lines of her hardsuit glowing blue, then orange, before finally settling on a bright, pulsating red.

"Connected to the Teleporter's Animus Machinae," The Culexus murmurs, her helmet's vox-speakers broadcasting her words in an irritated-sounding growl. "Coordinates set. All systems green and charging for teleportation." A harsh burst of static, followed by a series of frantic-sounding clicks, and Yuma's voice comes back. "Twenty seconds to teleportation flare. Nineteen. Eighteen. Seventeen--"

The room lights flicker once, twice, before dying a slow, programmed death into darkness - a darkness that is then quickly vanquished by circles of light etching themselves on the floor, bearing names and ranks, one for each member of your Kill-Team.

And just like how they declared each of your Kill-Team's ranks and monikers, they also revealed brief, candid glimpses of their personalities as they braced themselves for the trauma of teleportation.

[1/2]

>>36305557

Mami standing stock still, eyes closed and beret clutched to her chest, as if to pay her respects.

Sayaka and Kyoko standing together, hand in hand, fingers interlaced in a rare moment of intimacy, while their free hands curled around their weapons with the same fervent grip that they held on to each other.

Wendy standing beside Mami, testing the edge of her knife against her thumb, before shoving it back into its sheath strapped to her hip. Only to pull it back out and repeat the entire process a moment later.

And then there's you. Standing alone, the circle underneath your feet declaring you to be Warmaster of the Ninth Officio, with your adopted name written in bold, stark lettering. Not Murderface, but--

"Chiaki!"

You look up, and see Midori running towards you. You have enough time to blink before your Callidus catches you in another hug. One brief, desperate one that has you gasping. She whispers something into your ear, fervent, almost like a prayer. Or a blessing. Perhaps even something as simple as an appeal.

Or maybe all three, all at once. You're not sure.

"Please be safe, Chiaki. I love you."

"FIVE!" Yuma is roaring from her vox now, over a deafening hum of machinery that had suddenly come out of nowhere, juxtaposed with the whine of something dangerously massive cycling up to release its accumulated charge. "MISS MIDORI, GET CLEAR! THREE! TWO--!"

One moment before that final count - a split second before you're sent screaming into the hell behind reality - and it's here that Midori finally pulls away from you.

Her tearful face is the last thing you see before the world disappears in a million shades of black.

And the last thing you hear just before the world falls away underneath you is your own screaming.

. . .

. .

.

[2/3]

>>36305335
And you have every right too.

Which is why you'll hate what I'm working on.

>>36305599

Wait. Something's...wrong.

Teleportation's supposed to be instantenous.

It shouldn't be a matter of perception, either. This should have been quick - traumatic, maybe, but it was supposed to be quick.

Something's wrong! Something's fucked with the teleportation!

Still blind, still trapped in the darkness, you grope around for the beacon strapped to your wrist. Panic making your movements sluggish, fear making them clumsy.

Fuck if you're going to end up trapped here forever! Not like this, it can't end like this--

"...So they did find you." A strangely-familiar voice echoes in the choking, clasping darkness around you. "Surprising, then, to find out that they're actually useful for something."

What? Who's that? Who found you? Where--

You blink, and the very act of it banishes the darkness around you in one single instant. Revealing a blindingly-bright plain, empty and devoid of all life, as far as the eye can see. The jarring lack of anything to stand on also jarringly replaced by what feels like cold, slick marble under the soles of your heels.

...Jesus Christ, where the fuck did Yuma land you?

"Don't blame the poor thing. She hasn't much longer." The familiar voice rings again, this time from behind you - and you whirl around, automatically pulling your Golden Desert Eagle free from your shoulder holster. The gleaming, polished firearm all but singing as you slice it across the air to draw a bead on whoever had the fucking audacity to sneak up on you, and then revealed their presence with a soft-spoken sentence.

[3/4]

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>>36305626

And you blink again as you realize that you're aiming your gun at yourself.

A paler, sluttier version of yourself.

With black wings, a black feathery dress, and a crimson ribbon tied to her hair.

"Have a care, you insignificant worm." She says softly in your own voice, raising your own gloved hand and pointing at the gun leveled at your own face. "Point that disgusting thing somewhere else."

How do you react?

[]...Who the fuck are you?
[]WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU?
[]Calmly ask for her name, and then fire a kill-shot before she can answer. You know who this bitch is, now you want to see how she reacts.

>>36305641
>[]Calmly ask for her name, and then fire a kill-shot before she can answer. You know who this bitch is, now you want to see how she reacts.

There is no need to be upset.

>>36305641
>[]Calmly ask for her name, and then fire a kill-shot before she can answer. You know who this bitch is, now you want to see how she reacts.

>>36305641
>[]Calmly ask for her name, and then fire a kill-shot before she can answer. You know who this bitch is, now you want to see how she reacts.

>>36305641
Why would we ask who she is?

We already know?

The three stooges told us that she is the "transcendent one"

>>36305641
[x]The shooty one

Fuck the police yeahhhh

>>36305599
>interlocked fingers
So lewd!
>>36305641
Happening!
>[X]Calmly ask for her name, and then fire a kill-shot before she can answer. You know who this bitch is, now you want to see how she reacts.

[X]Calmly ask for her name, and then fire a kill-shot before she can answer. You know who this bitch is, now you want to see how she reacts.

>>36305641
>[]Calmly ask for her name, and then fire a kill-shot before she can answer. You know who this bitch is, now you want to see how she reacts.
They can't say you didn't ask questions before you started shooting at least

>>36305641
>[] it's you...

>>36305641
>[X]Calmly ask for her name, and then fire a kill-shot before she can answer. You know who this bitch is, now you want to see how she reacts.

s-sorry homucifer

>>36305641
[X]Use timestop to bring Pinky here.

She did not believe us about the TNO eh?

>>36305641
>[X]Calmly ask for her name, and then fire a kill-shot before she can answer. You know who this bitch is, now you want to see how she reacts.

>>36305641
>[x]...Who the fuck are you?
>[x]Who "found me"?

>>36305641
>[]...Who the fuck are you?
Let's be careful there, we don"t know where this bullet is going to end and it would be a shame if we ended killing someone of our team

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>I am the shadow, the true self

>>36305641
>[X]Calmly ask for her name, and then fire a kill-shot before she can answer. You know who this bitch is, now you want to see how she reacts.

>>36305641
>[]...Who the fuck are you?

>>36305709
Oh shit, you're right.

I change my vote >>36305688

No shooting. It's not like it's gonna kill her anyway.

>>36305641
>[]...Who the fuck are you?

>>36305649
Does anyone honestly think this is any different from pissing on a bear jacked up on rageroids?

It will just piss them off and we get smacked.

Best case scenario, she thinks its funny.

>>36305709
Fucking this.

>>36305641
[]...Who the fuck are you?

>>36305760
>>36305739
>>36305709
These, you chucklefucks.

>>36305760

We know how she is. Sometimes the right answer is not to question, but to act.

>>36305641
[x] Other
"Transcendent One. Couldn't you have picked a better time? Or called like a normal person?"

>>36305798
Seconding

>>36305641
>[]...Who the fuck are you?

>>36305760
Strictly speaking, we don't even know if she is real. There was some talk before about those going to AR seeing their own witches or somesuch.

This might not even be the real and true TNO.

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>>36305641
>>36305722

*Aria of the Soul intensifies*

[x]...Who the fuck are you?

>>36305823
TNO? What does the N stand for?

>>36305808
Act by bringing a slingshot to a tank fight?

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>>36305641
[x]Calmly ask for her name, and then fire a kill-shot before she can answer. You know who this bitch is, now you want to see how she reacts.

>>36305798
What if this what Kharn's warning from Malal was about? What if Homucifer fucking with our perception is how Kyoko dies?

Besides, shooting her might ruin our chances of adding her to the harem end.

>>36305641
>[]Calmly ask for her name, and then fire a kill-shot before she can answer. You know who this bitch is, now you want to see how she reacts.
"Homura Akemi, I presume"

>>36305841
>What if this what Kharn's warning from Malal was about

I really doubt it.

>>36305641
>[x]Calmly ask for her name, and then fire a kill-shot before she can answer. You know who this bitch is, now you want to see how she reacts.

I guess we're first in, considering our kill team is nowhere in sight

>>36305641
[x] Twist shield to time stop and show Pinky.

>>36305833

God-weapon vs God-like being sounds fair. And the "act" is making a point.

>>36305641
[]...Who the fuck are you?

Lets try to avoid sitting on a hornets nest.

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>>36305641

>>36305798
>>36305815
Whether these were supposed to be votes or just bitching at anon was really ambiguous.

>>36305641
[x] ...who the fuck are you?

>>36305864
Perhaps. Or the teleport split everyone up. Or we are not in AR at all.

>>36305878

>>36305815
is me, and that's a vote

>>36305878
I did the first one, I voted before that, I think the guy seconding might be voting but I don't know.

>>36305864
If this is anything like what happened to Yuma, then no, we weren't first in.

>>36305641
>"Diabolum cum occidere non potest pyrobolus." Holster the Deagle.

You cannot kill the Devil with a bomb.

>>36305864
Remember what happened with Yuma on Walpurgisnacht? And time in the AR is known to be fucky.

>>36305888
>>36305891
Thanks for clarifying!

>>36305916
AR is the Warp, we might very well end up several years in the past

>>36305928
or somewhere else entirely.

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>>36305928

>>36305649
>>36305652
>>36305654
>>36305657
>>36305659 5
>>36305672
>>36305681
>>36305688
>>36305694
>>36305731 10
>>36305835
>>36305845
>>36305857 13

13 for violence.

>>36305696
>>36305709
>>36305735
>>36305752
>>36305778 5
>>36305809
>>36305815
>>36305818
>>36305877 10

10 for diplomacy.

Violence wins over diplomacy. Just like in real life.

>>36306031
Anon chooses "lass with wings, five rounds rapid".
>>36305976
>missing i-frame.gif

>>36306031
Our opponent is a warped goddess mirror image of us. Just like in real life.

>>36306031
Midorable changed his vote at >>36305739
and >>36305687 sounds like diplomacy to me.

>>36306031
Actually >>36305688 changed his vote. So it's 12 - 11
Remenber another vote who ended with just one more voice for one side ?

>>36306031
Success rate of violence on gods and godlike beings: 0/2
Success rate of diplomacy, Midori hugs, and feeding Mami's pancakes to an insane witch-god on our lap: 4/4

>>36306095
Homucifer is us and would we really respect ourselves if we didn't shoot first?

>>36306086
Yeah, I counted that vote as diplomacy, which left it at 12-12, then I went with the standard tiebreaker of 'the first vote after the voting period ends gets it'.

Because there are always votes after the voting period ends.

>"Don't blame the poor thing. She hasn't much longer."
Dammit, leave Yuma alone, she did nothing wrong!

>>36306161
Gunboat diplomacy, then. Pax Homurana.

>>36306130
Murderface wouldn't. But we're Chiaki the watch-wearing dildo now, not a magical girl with nothing to lose.

>>36306163
What if Homucifer is an illusion and we're really shooting Yuma?

>>36306161
Wait diplomacy won?

You alllll-ways shoot...the onnnnnes you love

>>36306234
I think by so, but by a single vote

>>36306234
Sadly.

Or maybe luckily.

>>36306254
Maybe we narrowly avoided another get fucked

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>Shooting her
Kek

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>>36306254
Its gonna go bad either way

>>36306277
I think we just narrowly avoided not looking like a pussy in front of our evil terrorself, but optimism is good!

>>36306292
But she already thinks we're a useless good-for-nothing. Why would an ineffectual act of violence change that opinion?

>>36306308
That's what the dolls think. We know nothing about what She thinks.

>>36306308
If the option is action or inaction, then even if it's only a .001% chance of achieving anything, you should take action!

That sounded pretty cool, right?

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>>36306292
Either way, I think we've got another questionably sane goddess after us.

>>36306348
We should have licked Homucifer's soul gem to really catch her off guard

>>36306348
Totally cool

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>>36306348
Wendy trying so hard to look cool for anon and failing

It's pretty moe.

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>>36306372

>>36306410
W-what's that spoiler text say

it better be 'like a total badass' or something

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>>36305641

I was a Transcendent One before it was cool.

>>36306410
Wendy is always moe.

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>>36305641
>>36305626
>>36305599
>>36305557
I've been waiting for this!

>>36306348
>Diplomacy isn't taking action.

This is what murderhobos actually believe.

>>36306456
>schlick schlick

Heretical! The pink ones salivate and go uwehihihihi, not something lewd!

Remember, Chiaki fairs better with decisive action.

Taking this pot shot is decisive

>>36306456
...now kiss

>>36306456
Homu x Homu is best ship

>>36306479
I hate to tell you, snugglebuns, but 'not shooting someone' isn't diplomacy.

And calling 'asking a question we know the answer to and she almost certainly knows we know the answer to' diplomacy is a bit of a stretch.

We'll get to actual diplomacy in a minute, or she'll do crazy god shit. Or both!

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>>36306495
Madoka may have been pure, but Pinkie is the opposite.

>>36306511
Soon.

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>>36306456
HERESY!

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>Oh boy I managed to wake up in time for the thread let's see if we've started kil-
>>36305641
WELL SHIT

>>36306569
It's not heretical if we're both in skirts and thigh highs anon

>>36305915
if he comes near me, I'm gonna rip his nipples off

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>>36304310
Platypi.

Not even twice.

>>36306535

One of these days, anon's constant penchant for inaction is going to bite us in the ass.

It'll be really sad.

But let's see how this goes for now.

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>>36306599
What are you talking about? That is clearly a drawing of Chiaki.

Besides, I trust all the people we brought to be able to deal with a little Chiaki "shoot first" action.

>>36305696

You glare down the Golden Desert Eagle's sights, your finger tightening on the trigger.

It's her, you realize. It's that...that bitch that the Three Stooges had been so torn up about, with every mention of her coming from them tainted with either frustration, shame, or barely-kept rage.

But more than that - more than all of those combined - they spoke about her with a helpless, regretful guilt. A guilt that told spoke of their inability to reconcile themselves with the fact that there was nothing they could have done, instead holding on to the self-flagellating concept that if they had simply been strong enough, steadfast enough, LOYAL enough - this would never have happened. SHE would never have happened.

They hated her, they wanted her dead with all of their being - but at the same time, they felt guilty for her and for what she'd done. As if their own failures in their own timeline was proof enough that they were complicit about what this bitch did to everyone.

Not you, though. Not a single iota of guilt in your system for this smirking cunt in the black feathers and eyebags and skeletal wings. You feel guilty for what happened to Pinky, sure, in the times when she's not doing her level best to kill you. You feel guilty - and hate yourself accordingly - about what happened to Kharn. You feel guilty for what you did to Wendy, and hope that an opportunity will come down the line for you to be able to resolve things with her.

But not for this...Witch. Not for the is abomination staring at you like you're some sort of pathetic insect begging to be stomped.

Only hate. Only anger. Only a cold, killing rage that filled your veins with ice and froze your heart.

It would be so easy to simply pull the trigger--

--which is why you don't.

Slowly, carefully, you take your finger out of the trigger guard, and carefully slip the Desert Eagle back into its holster. All while keeping the winged abomination firmly in the center of your vision.

[1/2]

>>36306634

"Look at that. You can follow instructions after all. This is a day of many wonders." The raven-haired girl with the crimson ribbon seems to relax. Her wings, brutally-skeletal and sparsely-feathered, stretches out - momentarily displaying their full and fearsome wingspan, before folding back neatly behind their owner. Leaving little evidence that they were even there - besides, of course, the bony pinions resting behind the horror's bared shoulders.

"It's a bit disappointing you didn't shoot, though. That would've been nostalgic." The girl smiles.

You shake your head, feeling your lips curl into a reflexive scowl. Shooting her probably won't do much good to anyone, even you. Instead, you want some questions answered--

"And smart! That is exceedingly rare in our kind, even more in our..." Her smile widens. "...little extended family. Maybe, just maybe, you're actually the one they've been hoping would appear. Someone who'd fix everything, not that things needed fixing as it is."

She cackles then. A clear, almost lovely sound, enchanting in its pitch and tone. It sounded like music.

Music that, once listened to closely enough, would reveal the sound of a million voices screaming in pain in the background. In eternal torment.

"So, your first question." She nods to you, her crimson bow bobbing up and down. "I'm not going to answer that, because it'll just be insulting for the both of us. You know who I am already." She smiles again, revealing white, perfect teeth. "Your second question? Well, you know who they are. I won't talk about them, because once you do you summon one of them, and summoning one of them gets all the others piling in and they can be so annoying--"

[2/3]

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>>36306535
>snugglebuns

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>>36306645

...What? Your eyes narrow at this. Does she mean does weird...doll things? The ones that call you--

"Good-for-nothing, yes." The horror wearing your face and speaking with your voice grimaces again. "That's what they call me, too. It becomes grating the first couple of times, and then you get over it. What you don't get over, though, is the tomato-throwing. Or other vegetables, when they run out of tomatoes." She shudders. "I FUCKING hate those things."

How do you respond?

[]...Why are you doing this?
[]Stop this. Whatever you're doing, stop this. You're more powerful than me, you can probably kill me right now. Just stop this. Let Pinky go. Let Madoka go. She'll forgive you. I know she will.
[]Fight me. One on one, faggot. Let's settle this right here and now.

>>36306679
>[]...Why are you doing this?

>>36306599
Platypuses or platypodes, anon. It's from Greek, not latin.

none of these options look appealing.

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>>36306679
>Alright then. Get back in the gun
>That is why you showed up, right?

>>36306679
>[X]...Why are you doing this?
....inb4 "get fucked".....

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>>36306679
>[x] 1v1 me faggot

My will is only so strong, Decu.

>>36306679
>[X]...Why are you doing this?
I feel like #2 is a trigger for something awful.

Also, #3 is like Get Fucked on a titanic scale, so let's not.

>>36306679
[x]...Why are you doing this?
If she's not going to try to resolve the Pinkie/Madoka problem, then what is she even here for? Why pull us here, when we all know that she's the one who caused this and she hasn't fixed this in the millions of iterations we've gone through.

>>36306679
[X]...Why are you doing this?

Have you even seen what you did to madoka?

>>36306679
>[]...Why are you doing this?
>[]Stop this. Whatever you're doing, stop this. You're more powerful than me, you can probably kill me right now. Just stop this. Let Pinky go. Let Madoka go. She'll forgive you. I know she will.

>>36306679
>>[X]...Why are you doing this?

>>36306679
[x]...Why are you doing this?
[x]Stop this. Whatever you're doing, stop this. You're more powerful than me, you can probably kill me right now. Just stop this. Let Pinky go. Let Madoka go. She'll forgive you. I know she will.

>Whynotboth.jpg

>>36306679
[X]...Why are you doing this?

>>36306679
[X]Stop this. Whatever you're doing, stop this. You're more powerful than me, you can probably kill me right now. Just stop this. Let Pinky go. Let Madoka go. She'll forgive you. I know she will.

>>36306679
>[]Stop this. Whatever you're doing, stop this. You're more powerful than me, you can probably kill me right now. Just stop this. Let Pinky go. Let Madoka go. She'll forgive you. I know she will.

>>36306679
>[x]...Why are you doing this?
>[x]Stop this. Whatever you're doing, stop this. You're more powerful than me, you can probably kill me right now. Just stop this. Let Pinky go. Let Madoka go. She'll forgive you. I know she will.
Yeah, this will totally work. Totally.

[x]1

I;ll play along with the cliche storm, we all know Homulucifer has probably heard this question countless times over a thousand years though.

>>36306679
>[X] ...Why are you doing this?

Yeah, NONE of these answers look like they'll end well. This one's cliche, but Chiaki doesn't have time for huge psychotic YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND, I DID WHAT I HAD TO rants or machismo assbeating/posturings.

Got more important things to deal with right now, like Kyoko or someone maybe not dying.

>>36306679
>[X]...Why are you doing this?
Shit, what is she even doing? If she's willing to talk, we're willing to listen.

Maybe give her a hug if it looks like it would help. We might not be Midori, but we can follow her example.

>>36306679
[]...Why are you doing this?

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>>36306679

>[x]...Why are you doing this?

What is the point of all of this? Its not like there is anyone watching the world go to shit except for us.

>>36306679
[]Stop this. Whatever you're doing, stop this. You're more powerful than me, you can probably kill me right now. Just stop this. Let Pinky go. Let Madoka go. She'll forgive you. I know she will.

>>36306679

[x] Other - So, what do you need me here for ? I have a different party to crash.

Today we have to navigate a labyrinth knowing that every choice we make is one a past Homu made, and it didn't work then, either.

>>36306679
[X] ...Why?
"You have a plan. You always have a plan. I might not be the best plan, but you've got some idea of how this is going to end. And don't say you don't, because we both know that's bullshit.
"So, go ahead, spill already."

Oh look, our fucks given count has finally bottomed out.

>>36306679
>[x] Fight me. One on one, faggot. Let's settle this right here and now.

>>36306679
>>[]...Why are you doing this?
Hopefully this extends to "why are you here right now" and not just the big-picture stuff

>>36306679
>"So I take it you have a reason for calling this meeting."

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>>36306679
[x] What do you want?
What is her expectation for where all of this will lead?
What does she want to come of this?

>>36306679
>[x]...Why are you doing this?

>>36306679
A varient of >>36306772 would be nice
A sort of "Do you mind if I work while we talk, got a lot of magical girls to kill"
Doubt it'd work though

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>>36306773
Which is why we should disregard the options presented and do something different, if not crazy
>Summon Tiny P-
wait no shit Rea's inside
>>36306791
Seconding this

[x]... Why are you doing this?

2's a trigger, 3 we get us mushed or laughed off.

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>>36306679
[x]...Why are you doing this?

>>36306808
"TINY PEEEEEEETE! IT'S SHOWTIME!"

>>36306679
>[]Fight me. One on one, faggot. Let's settle this right here and now.

>>36306679
>"Did you want to make a deal or something? Because I am pretty sure my soul is worthless."

If you are not sure how to count this, just -1 from the fighting.

>>36306828
You are not seriously considering wasting tiny pete on Akuma Homura.

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>>36306828
>"TINY PEEEEEEETE! IT'S SHOWTIME!"
So, can one of the drawfags draw Chiaki and Tiny Pete as Roger Smith and Big O?

>[x] 1v1 me faggot

Its time. We have the power of imouto moe. She doesn't

>>36306679
>[X]...Why are you doing this?

>>36306784
Only if it's naked wrestling

>>36306679
>[]Stop this. Whatever you're doing, stop this. You're more powerful than me, you can probably kill me right now. Just stop this. Let Pinky go. Let Madoka go. She'll forgive you. I know she will.

>>36306679
If we fuck, does that count as masturbation?

>>36306861
Now I want them to draw Tiny Pete in a suit and tie, summoning a giant chiaki with wrist watch

>>36306679
>[X]...Why are you doing this?
>[X]Nice tits.

>>36306679
[X]Stop this. Whatever you're doing, stop this. You're more powerful than me, you can probably kill me right now. Just stop this. Let Pinky go. Let Madoka go. She'll forgive you. I know she will.

Also lets hit on her.

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>>36306679
WINNER IS 1v1 ME

>>36306679
Wasn't sure what to vote for as those all look like shit but>>36306895 and >>36306903 have the right idea.

Lets go fuck our self.

>>36306860
Does that look like a vote to you?

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>>36306903
>>[X]Nice tits.
>Is that one of the perks of being a god or does that getup just have great support?
>>36306923
eep

>>36306679
[x] Other - What do you want?

Asking why is pointless because she won't answer. Asking her to stop is pointless because she won't. Fighting her is pointless because she could atomize us. There's practically nothing we can do at this moment to stop her or even put up a fight, so why bother?

>>36306923
This can only lead to nobody getting hurt and is in noway suicidally reckless.

>>36306679
[x] Why are you doing this?

Homusatan does not give a fuck what madoka thinks.

>>36306943
>>>[X]Nice tits.
>>Is that one of the perks of being a god or does that getup just have great support?
.......Kind of want to change my vote to this because
>>36306950
Has a point.
Too bad its too late anyway.

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>>36306923
wait bullshit

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>>36306923
>"1v1 me fgt" won

>>36306923
Uh-oh.

We've got to catch her by surprise. Give her an aggressive kiss.

>>36306950
Because confusing the enemy sometimes works better than trying to talk to them.

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I doubt Chiaki can pull off the "Hold! What you are doing to us is wrong! Why do you do this thing?"

This can only end hilariously. I await the outcome.

>>36307029
muh sa-matra

>>36307107
muh doka

>>36305641
>>[x]...Who the fuck are you?
>>[x]Who "found me"?

>>36307003
What the hell? Why does my post have that title?

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>>36307063
Sorry, anyon. I lied.

I lied to all of you.

I thought 22 votes for 'why are you doing this' versus four votes for '1v1 me' was such an obvious disparity more people would catch it...

>>36307029
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XEFALqujPPU

>>36307152
I even called it out, here >>36307003.

>>36307187
And I'm glad! so did
>>36306983

but people were still convinced by my clever tricks

>>36307152
No need. all the options were landmines, so hilarity will ensue regardless what won

>>36307152
Why would you deceive us so NECO?! we trusted you!

>>36307214
Now why would you do a damn fool thing like that, nya?

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I want Pinky and the Transcendent One to kiss.

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>Please join me again this Friday! Let's get the Prophet arc done!
>suddenly homuhomju
Inb4 we finish up with akuma here and pop out to find the rest of our absurdly competent kill-team with orika trussed up like a hog covered in blood while wendy snacks on the flesh of fallen angels