>>35860719
"I'm afraid I can't do that for you."

You glare up at the (theoretically) apologetic clerk. Okay, seriously, between your burning rage at having to stand on a goddamn crate to even see OVER the counter, you must have heard her wrong. You just wanted Maia's number-

"I'm deeply sorry, Ms. Twelfthbay, but we're not allowed to give out our members' personal contact information."

Even to other members? Look, you KNOW you look like something the carp dragged in, but you're a card-carrying registered member!

"Especially not to other members." The brunette bows deeply, the motion not even wrinkling her fancy little suit. "I'm afraid that competition between adventurers can get rather heated. We've had some incidents in the past. And with how famous some adventurers can get..."

(cont.)

>>35860725
She trails off, glancing over your shoulder. You follow her gaze; Ester- the Dragon Warrior, and apparently something of a celebrity around these parts- taking this opportunity to sift through her mail, looking rather sheepish. It's actual paper mail, which probably narrows her target audience down to a few pretty specific generations, and there's a lot of it.

... well, you can't say you don't understand. You're not sure you'd want some random schmucks looking your number up and cold-calling your phone to sell you products or ask for your donations to charity or something like that. On the other hand, you REALLY want to get in touch with Maia. She's the really civilized type, and she's all about nation-governing and city-building; you're aiming to build a fortress or two yourself, so you could definitely use her advice.

Besides, you feel a kind of kinship with her. As far as you know, she was a freelancer like yourself for the longest time. Maia probably has the best chance of understanding the shit you've been through.

[ ] [STUBBORN] Keep asking the clerk to bend the rules for you. Just a bit. You really would like Maia's number.
[ ] [MESSAGE] Fine; just send Maia a message through the Guild. It's hard to say when she'll get it, though.
[ ] [LOCATION] Can you at least get a rough estimate of where in the world Maia could be? You can try to visit her yourself.
[ ] [FORGET IT] It's not that important. You can always figure out something later.
[ ] [WRITE-IN]

>>35860756
>[x] [MESSAGE] Fine; just send Maia a message through the Guild. It's hard to say when she'll get it, though.

Fuck this, we've got exploring to do.

>>35860756
>[x] [MESSAGE] Fine; just send Maia a message through the Guild. It's hard to say when she'll get it, though.

Also, I don't really appreciate having gamergate and ask.fm bullshit on my twitter feed.

>>35860756

[x] [MESSAGE] Fine; just send Maia a message through the Guild. It's hard to say when she'll get it, though.

Missed you, Blorp!

>>35860756
>[ ] [MESSAGE] Fine; just send Maia a message through the Guild. It's hard to say when she'll get it, though.
Send her OUR contact info
when she gets it, she can contact us and tell us hers.
It is a sensible policy, we really DON'T want them to giving some schmuck our contact info

>>35860756
>[ ] [MESSAGE] Fine; just send Maia a message through the Guild. It's hard to say when she'll get it, though.

>>35860756
Yay you're back.

> MESSAGE

>>35860756
>[X] [MESSAGE]

You lean your elbows on the counter and let out a breath. Well, alright, that's fine. You're a big girl; it's not like the world's going to end if you don't talk to her RIGHT THIS INSTANT, and it's not like you're going to drop anything to have a tearful heartfelt reunion with her.

You ask the clerk if they can at least pass on a message to her. That at least, doesn't seem to cross into any horrible tangled jungles of red tape or policies, so you leave a simple note for Maia. The clerk assures you that she'll be able to pick it up the next time she comes into any Guild branch in Gamindustri; even if she ends up in Leanbox or Planeptune or Lastation, she'll get it.

Well, that's one thing done, at least. Actually, from the look of things, that's EVERYTHING done. You spent your money the best you can, and you're pretty pleased with how it turned out- for the first time in a long time, you're fully armored. You've never felt more protected in your life; since you're decked out in nothing but iron, that's saying a LOT. But at least you won't die because a lucky shot with a rusty dagger lops off your arm.

Speaking of your arms, you've even got a nifty pair of gauntlets that's apparently made out of the bodies of liquid metal slimes or something. It's a pretty good purchase, but it's almost TOO good; you can't help but wait for the other shoe to drop. You're half-afraid that merely purchasing the things tore open a rift connecting the surface world to the... to the circus, and that de- /clowns/ are going to boil out of the earth any moment now.

More to the point, you've actually got a moment to THINK, now that events aren't moving so fast.

(Cont.)

>>35861446
You sink down onto one of the benches against the wall; the Guild branch is honestly a lot less sinister than you'd think. It's all super-high-tech decorations, like they were shooting for a sci-fi look, but the way they do the lights is actually kind of soothing. The background colors aren't horribly noisy or distracting or anything, and it's tempting to just sit back and watch adventurers going about their business.

You glance around. Ester's back is turned to you, but you pretty much instantly recognize her from her sky-blue armor and messily spiked hair; she's still going through her messages, the poor girl. As for Moru, the catgirl monster hunter that you somehow convinced to stick with you, she's somewhere in the back, talking to someone behind a counter you didn't even see when you came in.

You take a fortifying swig of alcohol. Right, then. Time to get down to business. Now that you don't need to panic about Sharicite or meeting goddesses or giant insects attacking you out of nowhere, it's time to figure out what you're going to do next.

[ ] [PHONE] Check your personal messages. And the headlines. And maybe call up Mojang, you've been meaning to continue your earlier conversation.
[ ] [QUESTS] Get up off your lazy ass and check out the message boards. You're equipped up to the nines, it's time to clear some dungeons and take your first step to getting your own fortress.
[ ] [PARTY] Go bug Ester. Or maybe Moru. Or, hell, go bug them both. What're they up to, and what're their own plans from here on out?
[ ] [OUTSIDE] Get a little fresh air, do a little reminiscing.
[ ] [WRITE-IN]

>>35861471
>[x] [QUESTS] Get up off your lazy ass and check out the message boards. You're equipped up to the nines, it's time to clear some dungeons and take your first step to getting your own fortress.
FUCK THE PAST
IT'S ALL ABOUT THE FUTURE, BABY

>>35861471
>[ ] [QUESTS] Get up off your lazy ass and check out the message boards. You're equipped up to the nines, it's time to clear some dungeons and take your first step to getting your own fortress.

>[ ] [QUESTS] Get up off your lazy ass and check out the message boards. You're equipped up to the nines, it's time to clear some dungeons and take your first step to getting your own fortress.
>[ ] [PARTY] Go bug Ester. Or maybe Moru. Or, hell, go bug them both. What're they up to, and what're their own plans from here on out?
Ask Ester what her letter says.

>>35861471


[ ] [QUESTS] Get up off your lazy ass and check out the message boards. You're equipped up to the nines, it's time to clear some dungeons and take your first step to getting your own fortress.

An adventurer is us. So time to adventure, and get more cool stuff!

>>35861471
>[ ] [QUESTS] Get up off your lazy ass and check out the message boards. You're equipped up to the nines, it's time to clear some dungeons and take your first step to getting your own fortress.
Gotta get that money for that land

>>35861471
>[ ] [QUESTS] Get up off your lazy ass and check out the message boards. You're equipped up to the nines, it's time to clear some dungeons and take your first step to getting your own fortress.
look for some Monster Hunter quests. Lots of loot opportunity there.

>>35861471

>[X] [QUESTS] Get up off your lazy ass and check out the message boards. You're equipped up to the nines, it's time to clear some dungeons and take your first step to getting your own fortress.
>[X] [PARTY] Go bug Ester. Or maybe Moru. Or, hell, go bug them both. What're they up to, and what're their own plans from here on out?

Do they want their fancy VIP rooms forged with menacing obsidian spikes or diamond-studded doorknobs? Carvings of great battles or elven heads on a pike? This is important.

>>35861471
>Quest

But get Ester & Moru's advice on what a good quest would be.

>>35861471
quests
we really need to find a white phial

>>35861471
> PARTY
We need to complete their loyalty quests.

>>35861471
>Go bug Ester. Or maybe Moru. Or, hell, go bug them both
I misread that as go HUG

>>35861471
>[X] [QUESTS]
>[X] [PARTY(?)]

Yeah, well, it's not a hard decision to make. Why would you even buy weapons and armor if you don't use it to crack some skulls? Or, uh, use it to stop your own skull from being cracked.

You hop off the bench and stride over to the big old bulletin board wall- although "bulletin board" doesn't really do it justice. The entire wall is one big electronic display, sort of a cross between an airport's departure/arrival timetable and a stock market ticker; it's pretty damn fancy, and your head hurts just thinking about how much dwarven labor it'd take to put that sort of thing together.

Not that you're particularly surprised. Adventurers stake their living on quests, successfully completed quests generate shares, and shares are the lifeblood of Gamindustri's goddesses, so it stands to reason that the Guild would splurge on stuff related to quests.

As you take in the sheer size of the board, you're almost tempted to go ask Ester and Moru what sorts of quests would be good to take on- after all, you've only gone on freestyle dungeon runs with no real objective in mind, other than "kill things / get loot / return to step 1." After a moment of reading, though, you really, REALLY don't think you need to ask them anything.

>Help me find my lost pet dogoo! / Lowee
>Please help babysit my children for eight hours on Friday! / Lastation
>Save us! There's a rat in the cellar! / Lowee
>Please provide security for our upcoming concert! / Leanbox
>A food critic's coming to our restaurant today! Please kick his ass! / Planeptune
>I need dating advice! Please respond ASAP as possible! / Leanbox

(Cont.)

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>>35862260
You drag your hand down your face, and you suddenly feel absolutely justified in delaying your own Guild registration as long as you did. Does... does the Guild not actually /filter/ the quests they receive before posting them for adventurers? Is this shit what registered adventurers are expected to do? Are you going to have to dip into babysitting tasks and their ilk to get your own quota completed??

To your relief, you find /actual/ dungeon-delving quests further down the list. There aren't as many as you'd have liked, but there's at least enough to give you a /choice/, and a lot of them overlap quite nicely- for example, one guy wants adventurers to thin out the monster population in a field, while someone else needs flowers from that exact region. Unsurprisingly, the vast number of quests are local to Lowee; one or two are over in the other nations.

... to be honest, it really doesn't look that different from dungeon-delving on your own. It's just that you're expected to murder a few things or pick a few thingamajiggers along the way, and it really might take longer than you're used to, but...

(Cont.)

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>>35862288
[ ] [LOWEE: SNOWFIELDS] A small group of simple quests in an above-ground region; the main objective is to murder a large monster that's been terrorizing the local populace. Easier to take care of, but you'll have some competition.
[ ] [LOWEE: CAVERNS] One or two quests sending you deep underground, thinning out the monster population and looking for some pretty rare items. It probably won't be popular, but you're not sure Ester or Moru will be at home down there, and to be honest, your last trip put you off underground ruins for a while.
[ ] [LEANBOX] Some schmuck in Leanbox wants a collection of flora and a few monster bits only found in Lowee. You'll have to make the trek between nations on foot and get the stuff along the way, but it'll take a while. Mojang's up in there, but neither Ester nor Moru may have much reason to go.
[ ] [THE GRAVEYARD] Off the coast of Lowee, there's apparently an island that's one giant ruins (with a hell of a downer for a name). No details other than "check for suspicious activity, make sure world-ending monsters aren't present." You have no idea how difficult this one might be, but it's sure to have some good loot.
[ ] [DOMESTIC QUESTS] ... you know what? You've always wanted to try babysitting. What could possibly go wrong?
[ ] [PARTY] Ask Ester and Moru for their thoughts.

>>35862315
>[x] [PARTY] Ask Ester and Moru for their thoughts.
Liking the graveyard thing.

>>35862315
>[ ] [THE GRAVEYARD] Off the coast of Lowee, there's apparently an island that's one giant ruins (with a hell of a downer for a name). No details other than "check for suspicious activity, make sure world-ending monsters aren't present." You have no idea how difficult this one might be, but it's sure to have some
>[ ] [PARTY] Ask Ester and Moru for their thoughts.
Loot and it reminds me of home. Best choice.

>>35862315
>[x] [THE GRAVEYARD]

Time to put that new armor to use.

>>35862315
>[ ] [PARTY] Ask Ester and Moru for their thoughts.

>>35862315
>[ ] [THE GRAVEYARD] Off the coast of Lowee, there's apparently an island that's one giant ruins (with a hell of a downer for a name). No details other than "check for suspicious activity, make sure world-ending monsters aren't present." You have no idea how difficult this one might be, but it's sure to have some good loot.
>[ ] [PARTY] Ask Ester and Moru for their thoughts.

I won't lie though, I am tempted to do some of those Domestic Quests, if only for fun

>>35862315
[ ] [THE GRAVEYARD] Off the coast of Lowee, there's apparently an island that's one giant ruins (with a hell of a downer for a name). No details other than "check for suspicious activity, make sure world-ending monsters aren't present." You have no idea how difficult this one might be, but it's sure to have some good loot.
[ ] [PARTY] Ask Ester and Moru for their thoughts.
Honestly I want to see how bad they think it'll be.

>>35862315
>[ ] [THE GRAVEYARD] Off the coast of Lowee, there's apparently an island that's one giant ruins (with a hell of a downer for a name). No details other than "check for suspicious activity, make sure world-ending monsters aren't present." You have no idea how difficult this one might be, but it's sure to have some good loot.
>TIME TO DIE EDITION
THEN WE COME BACK

>>35862374
>I won't lie though, I am tempted to do some of those Domestic Quests, if only for fun
Same. I hope the bodyguard for a concert one is still up when we get back. That'd be cool.

>>35862427
>>35862374
personally i am thinking the lost pet dogoo
its probably a giant vicious dragon called dogoo and is owned by some infamous girl.
hilarity ensues

>>35862315

>[x] [THE GRAVEYARD] Off the coast of Lowee, there's apparently an island that's one giant ruins (with a hell of a downer for a name). No details other than "check for suspicious activity, make sure world-ending monsters aren't present." You have no idea how difficult this one might be, but it's sure to have some good loot.
>[x] [PARTY] Ask Ester and Moru for their thoughts.

The graveyard interests me, but we should probably get some input.

And being a concert security guard could be fun.

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>>35862315
>[X] [GRAVEYARD]
>[X] [PARTY]

It doesn't take you very long to decide- the Graveyard seems like the most promising option- but you still take a moment to consider your other choices.

See, if someone forced you, at knifepoint, to take one of the domestic jobs, you'd go straight for the concert security post. Compared to such gems as looking for someone's cat (which is probably impossible to complete, the damn thing's probably part of someone's outfit by now), being hired muscle is the one job that seems /tolerable/; sure, everyone would underestimate you because you're a shrimp, but you'd probably get carte blanche to punch some assholes in the crotch with your new gauntlets.

You're surprised it's over in Leanbox, though. You don't even follow this type of thing, but as far as you know, their one national idol apparently moved to Lastation, and the other big idol is, against all expectations, over in Planeptune. Strange.

You make a note to yourself to come back to this later; given that it's a pretty long tour, the concert security post seems to be an open invitation, sort of a drop-in-anytime position. You can get back to it once you return from the Graveyard job. IF you take the Graveyard job. You decide to ask your friends if-

"You want to go WHERE!?" Moru screeches. You can SEE the chill go down her spine, since it causes the fur on her ears and tail to stand on end. "And that quest description is just- it's stupidly vague! It's just asking you to do a dungeon run into the most unstable part of Gamindustri!"

(Cont.)

>>35863098
You glance over to Ester for a second opinion, but she's fallen completely still, frowning to herself, so you turn back to the panicking catgirl. Well, there's bound to be some sort of goddamn big monsters living there, right? Moru could definitely use the leather-

"No, no, no- half of them are glitches! You can't use ANY part of glitches!" Moru yowls, her ears completely flattened against her head. "NO one goes there, so it's swarming with horrible glitch monsters!"

Which also means that it'll be swarming with treasure, since no one actually goes there that often. Right?

"Are you kidding me!?"

Yeesh, alright already! You hold up your hands defensively, turning again to Ester. Is she going to tell you that it's a bad idea, too?

"... yeah, it kind of is," Ester murmurs, uncharacteristically somber. She looks up at you and smiles, maybe a bit sadly. "I can go with you. But if it's okay, I've got a few stops in mind, once we get there."

Moru looks at the Dragon Warrior like her hair's gone all spiky and golden. She calms down after a moment, but you note that her tail's still lashing. "If you're seriously set on going there, then... then I'll pass. And if you DON'T die horrible smelly deaths, then you can call me when you return!"

(Cont.)

>>35863120
... okay, Moru's really getting on your nerves. Look, is it REALLY that dangerous and/or fatal to go to this place? It's just called The Graveyard, it's not called The Big Fucking Deathtrap That Only Idiots Go To 'Cause It's Got A 1000% Fatality Rate.

"No, no, it's not THAT bad." Ester scratches her head in thought. "I mean, I go... what, once a year? Once every other year? You only put yourself in mortal danger if you stay out in the open for too long."

Huh. How about that.

[ ] [OKAY] If Ester's coming with you, then you don't think you'll have a lot to worry about.
[ ] [NOPE] If they really think it's such a bad idea, then maybe you should listen to them.
[ ] [MAYBE] If it's really that dangerous, then you'll just go find some more people to party up with?
[ ] [SMELL] Come to think of it, it'd be nice if Moru could figure out exactly WHAT you're carrying that makes you smell weird.
[ ] [WRITE-IN]

>>35863168
Write in: Ask Ester what she has in mind because we'd be a shitty party member if we just did everything we wanted after she's helped us so much.

>>35863168
>[ ] [NOPE] If they really think it's such a bad idea, then maybe you should listen to them.
I guess we could do the graveyard once we get a little stronger/better equipped/more party members
>[ ] [SMELL] Come to think of it, it'd be nice if Moru could figure out exactly WHAT you're carrying that makes you smell weird.

>>35863168
>[ ] [MAYBE] If it's really that dangerous, then you'll just go find some more people to party up with?
>[ ] [SMELL] Come to think of it, it'd be nice if Moru could figure out exactly WHAT you're carrying that makes you smell weird.

>>35863168
>[ x] [OKAY] If Ester's coming with you, then you don't think you'll have a lot to worry about.


Regret nothing,

>>35863168
>[ ] [NOPE]
>[ ] [SMELL]

>>35863230
Supporting.

Okay, it looks like we've got 2 votes for "Nope," 2 votes for "Maybe," 1 vote for "Yes," and 1 vote for "ask Ester what she's planning."

I... think I'll call the votes here and put the result in as a tentative "Maybe," depending on who they can rustle up! Writing!

>>35863168
>[X] [NOPE] If they really think it's such a bad idea, then maybe you should listen to them.
I guess we could do the graveyard once we get a little stronger/better equipped/more party members
>[X] [SMELL] Come to think of it, it'd be nice if Moru could figure out exactly WHAT you're carrying that makes you smell weird.

>>35863168
>[X] [NOPE] wins by a slim margin!

You massage your temples, feeling a headache coming on. Probably because Moru was screaming /right into your ear/. (The catgirl at least has the decency to look a little bit ashamed at that, though she covers it up by glancing away with a huff.)

Still, you didn't survive this long by jumping into dungeons way over your head without appropriate backup, right? Sure, you've got a neat weapon that you'd like to try out, but... you're not exactly the most proficient of fighters, for one thing. For another thing, you're only in iron armor. Iron armor! No quality modifiers attached at all! And on top of that, the last time you faced off against a glitch with Ester by your side, she jumped straight at it and needed you to pull her out of the fire.

"I-I got a little overconfident!" Ester sputters, her ever-present grin gone from her face for once. "It happens to everyone!"

... huh. Izzat actually embarrassment you see? It's a cute look on her.

"Urist-!"

Okay, okay, fine. Anyway, if she's planning on making detours in the Graveyard, then you're not going to be a shit party member. IF you go- IF you manage to rustle up some help- then you'll help Ester get wherever she needs to be.

"Really? That's... well. Thanks, Urist." That settles Ester down quickly enough. Still, it takes her a moment to find her words, and not because she's embarrassed. "But it's not like I want to run extra dungeons or anything, because- well, the Graveyard part is actually a pretty accurate description, you know? An' aside from that, it's got some... some memories, for me. I try to visit some landmarks every now and then. To remember."

For a moment, you can see that weight of history on Ester's shoulders again, reminding you that, like half the people living in Gamindustri, she only LOOKS like a schoolgirl.

(Cont.)

>>35864250
Moru's looking between you two, frowning uncertainly. "Well, if you're sure... I'm still not going, though. Sorry. I- I try not to fight things I can't... use."

... good for her, she's got the luxury to pick and choose what she fights- but you bite your lip and choke those words back. You're jealous, but you're not jealous enough to be a total ass to someone you've already caused a lot of trouble for. Instead, you ask her about something that's been bugging you for a while.

"Huh? That weird smell?" Moru lifts her chin, drawing in a few short breaths with her nose. "It's- um, let's see..."

It takes you guys a few minutes and a little pack-flipping, but you manage to narrow the mysterious olfactory irritant down to... a red rock. All three of you stare like a bunch of idiots at a simple, goddamned rock the size of your fist. And then two of you stare at the third, who wilts a little under the scrutiny.

"I'm sure! I'm REALLY sure! It's this... this thing!" Moru insists, baring her teeth. There's the hint of a fang there, and you're not sure why you expected anything else. "It doesn't smell right!"

You turn the rock over in your hands, considering it. It doesn't feel like horrible earth-shattering magics, and YOU certainly don't smell anything coming from it. You're kind of inclined to listen to the catgirl, though. You don't even remember how the damn thing found its way into your pack. With a sigh, you fold the red rock into your pocket and stand up, making your way back to one of the counters.

(Cont.)

>>35864273
May as well figure out what to do about that Graveyard run first, huh? If you can't at least find a third person to help you out, then you're not sure you want to risk it...

>CHOOSE ONE OF THE FOLLOWING OPTIONS, AND...
[A1] [KEEP] Keep the red rock. As far as you know, it hasn't harmed you so far, and it could be a McGuffin for all you know.
[A2] [DISCARD] Get rid of the red rock. Whatever Moru smells in it, it can't be good. You doubt you'd lose anything important.

>... AND CHOOSE ONE OF THE FOLLOWING POTENTIAL TEMP TEAMMATES.
[B1] [SCHOOLGIRL] The first person on the list is literally just a schoolgirl. It's literally written into her powerset; you skim over the rest of the app, and her experiences include being part of some school, Something-Something Memorial. You can't possibly imagine how she'd be useful, though it won't hurt to ask.
[B2] [ELECTRONIC IDOL] The second person on the list is a singer, some sort of electronic pop star. Maybe she's a bard of some sort, but you have your doubts that she'll be able to fight directly, even if she's willing. You'll probably have to ask her a bit.
[B3] [MARTIAL ARTIST] The third person on the list is actually someone who knows how to fight, but it seems she wants to blow through the Graveyard as fast as possible. She might not agree to take Ester on those various detours.
[B4] [FREELANCERS] To your mild surprise, it seems that the Guild allows you to partner up with any freelancers in the area. You'll get a smaller amount of the cut, and this quest won't count for your required number of successful quests. And even if they're stronger than what's available, many are reputed to have... personality problems.
[B5] [FORGET IT] ... you know what? You'll just drag Ester and Moru to the Lowee Snowfields group of quests instead, something nice and easy to ease you guys into adventuring together, and to ease you into knuckle-fighting in general.

>>35864303
[X] [KEEP] Keep the red rock. As far as you know, it hasn't harmed you so far, and it could be a McGuffin for all you know.
[X] [FORGET IT] ... you know what? You'll just drag Ester and Moru to the Lowee Snowfields group of quests instead, something nice and easy to ease you guys into adventuring together, and to ease you into knuckle-fighting in general.

Better get used to fighting together first, as well as get used to the gloves too.
Then we'll go to the graveyard.

>>35864303

[a3] poke the red rock with your new gizmo, maybe it can find something.

[B5] [FORGET IT] ... you know what? You'll just drag Ester and Moru to the Lowee Snowfields group of quests instead, something nice and easy to ease you guys into adventuring together, and to ease you into knuckle-fighting in general.

Warm up before doing something hard

>>35864303
>[A1] [KEEP] Keep the red rock. As far as you know, it hasn't harmed you so far, and it could be a McGuffin for all you know.
>[B5] [FORGET IT] ... you know what? You'll just drag Ester and Moru to the Lowee Snowfields group of quests instead, something nice and easy to ease you guys into adventuring together, and to ease you into knuckle-fighting in general.
Lets just take these Liquid Metal Slime Gauntlets for a spin, yeah?

>>35864303
>>35864355
A3
B5

>>35864303
>[A1] [KEEP] Keep the red rock. As far as you know, it hasn't harmed you so far, and it could be a McGuffin for all you know.
Lets get it identified.
>[B5] [FORGET IT] ... you know what? You'll just drag Ester and Moru to the Lowee Snowfields group of quests instead, something nice and easy to ease you guys into adventuring together, and to ease you into knuckle-fighting in general.
Promise to go with Ester. Just a small dungeon first.

>>35864303
>[A1] [KEEP] Keep the red rock. As far as you know, it hasn't harmed you so far, and it could be a McGuffin for all you know.
and
>[B2] [ELECTRONIC IDOL] The second person on the list is a singer, some sort of electronic pop star. Maybe she's a bard of some sort, but you have your doubts that she'll be able to fight directly, even if she's willing. You'll probably have to ask her a bit.
>[B5] [FORGET IT] ... you know what? You'll just drag Ester and Moru to the Lowee Snowfields group of quests instead, something nice and easy to ease you guys into adventuring together, and to ease you into knuckle-fighting in general.

A fourth party member couldn't hurt, could it? We've a monk, a paladin and a hunter, so a bard would help balance this murderfest out.

>>35864303
>KEEP
It's just a rock. There's absolutely no way it could be dangerous in any form.
>SCHOOLGIRL The first person on the list is literally just a schoolgirl.
Right. Got it. Let's hook up with this "schoolgirl" I'm sure her "school" experience will come in handy at the Graveyard.

A1
B5

Let's keep the mystery box! If Ester thinks the Graveyard is a bad idea, it probably is.

>>35864303
>[X] [KEEP]
>[X] [FORGET IT]

You can feel a nervous tic coming on, so you drown it in drink, because seriously. Wow.

You know what? Forget it. ALL of these choices are like something out of a nightmare! The absolute last thing you want is to have to babysit some non-combatants into what's reputedly the toughest dungeon run this side of Gamindustri. In your experience, civilians- even if they're adventurers- are seriously more trouble than they're worth, all screamy and runny and apt to do stupid things, like run away from paths that'll take them into safety. And even if "schoolgirl" and "idol" are apparently completely respectable job classes in this stupidly cute world, they'd STILL be back row fighters at best, and you don't want to have to deal with some glitch monster sneaking up on your party and biting their soft little heads off.

And you don't want to get started on freelancers! Half of them are probably as broken as you yourself are, while the other half is probably as noisy and annoying as that asshole Red and Blue duo you had to deal with earlier. You're not really sure you want to have to babysit EITHER group, you've got enough problems of your own to deal with as it is!

You take the rock out of your pocket and shove it deep inside your pack, growling a little to yourself. You know what? You're sick and tired of all these choices. It's time to do what comes easiest to you: inflicting horrible, horrible violence and pain on giant monsters, and you're counting on your party members to help you out. Sound good?

(Cont.)

>>35865198
"Sounds good!" Moru chirrups, her tail lashing. "I'm gonna take my baby for a test drive!"

... right, the monstrous lance-rocket terror that shouldn't actually exist. You glance over at Ester, and blink when you realize she's grinning pretty widely, too. Didn't she want to go to the Graveyard?

"Ahahah... well, there's really no rush, right? Like I said, once every other year! Besides..." Ester brings her hands down and ruffles your hair and the catgirl's hair at the same time, chortling like a dirty old man. "We've got the beginnings of a legendary adventuring party right here!"

Fine! Fine! Let's just go already, it's been far too long since you've had a nice good bout of violence that DIDN'T have you nearly pissing your pants in horror.

It's not too long after /that/ that you find yourself in the Lowee Snowfields. Not the most imaginative of names, but it's certainly on point: snow as far as you can see, except when you turn around and see Lowee's Basilicom rising in the far distance. Hell, the /city's/ not that far away, and you can still see those silly little mushroom buildings.

To be honest, you'd kind of expected this place to be a little more... remote.

"It's one of the easiest quest runs in the nation," Moru shrugs, setting up that gunlance of hers. You hear the sound of metal shrieking in protest, and can't help but shudder a little. "Of course it's going to be close enough that rookies can get back easily, and veterans can dash off their quest requirements if they really need to."

"Aah, this brings back memories~!" Ester croons, bouncing on her heels. As usual, she's like half a foot behind you. "The whole world stretching out before me, like some tapestry out of legend! Back when nothing was known, and everything seemed new! Man, it's been too long since I've been here!"

(Cont.)

>>35865225
... so, what. Are you seriously the only one who hasn't done Lowee Babby's First Dungeon Run before? The others are all old hands at this?

The Dragon Warrior readies her sword and shield, likely out of long habit than any conscious motion. "Well, it's been a LONG time since I've done this dungeon, so there's probably a lot that's changed, you know?"

"Yeah. We really can't let our guards down. Even the weakest monster can ruin your day if you're not careful." Moru ratchets some moving part of her gunlance, causing another ungodly metallic shriek and a cloud of black smoke. "Or, in some cases, other adventurers can come in and ruin everything for no discernable reason!"

... god, is she STILL sore about what you and Ester did to her!?

"Yes." The catgirl's answer is instantaneous, but before you can take another pull of your beer, she continues. "But I was ACTUALLY talking about the fact that we're actually being followed."

... you lift your face to the sky, glaring at nothing in particular. Goddammit, Armok, can't you have ONE dungeon run where absolutely nothing horrible or complicated happens? Just one?

[ ] [AGGRESS] FUCK EVERYTHING, THEY CAN'T FUCK YOU OVER IF YOU KICK THEIR SHIT IN FIRST
[ ] [CONFRONT] Just ask them straight up why they're following you. Anything to get you killing monsters sooner.
[ ] [IGNORE] Fuck it. You're not being paid enough to deal with this shit, you'll just go about your business.
[ ] [ESCAPE] Run into the hills, lose them in the snowfields! You're not dealing with ANY of their shit!
[ ] [WRITE-IN]

>>35865349

[X] BOOZGRESS

>>35865349
>[ ] [CONFRONT] Just ask them straight up why they're following you. Anything to get you killing monsters sooner.
But be ready to get killy if need be.

>>35865349
>[ ] [CONFRONT] Just ask them straight up why they're following you. Anything to get you killing monsters sooner.

>>35865349
[X][IGNORE] Keep them on your radar. If they try and kill-steal, murdalize them. If not. . . Well, you can confront them after the quest, and if they're fanstalking Ester you can charge them for what they did see.

>>35865349
>[ ] [CONFRONT]

>>35865349
>[x] Alcohol. Not for you unfortunately, but splash some in their general direction, then see what happens

>>35865349
> Boozegress

I can;t deny the appeal this has

> ternhatds critical

Damn straight, captcha, their hats are critical. We shall take them for ourselves.

>>35865349
Return to Lowee. These unknown parties are interfering with our quest.

>>35865349
>[ ] [CONFRONT]

>>35865349

[X] [BOOZE] Don't make important decisions sober. You are a dwarf.

[X] [CONFRONT] Just ask them straight up why they're following you. Anything to get you killing monsters sooner.

>>35865349
>[X] [CONFRONT]

Moru hefts her gunlance, keeping her gaze fixed straight ahead. "So what do we do? Should we just ignore them?"

Ester shakes her head. "Probably not a good idea. I don't want to have to watch my back while fighting monsters, you know?"

You ignore the both of them, take a long, deep draught from your beer, and turn back around. HEY FUCKTARDS, YOU KNOW THEY'RE THEY'RE. DON'T BE A BUNCH OF PUSSIES, GET OUT HERE AND FACE YOU DOWN LIKE REAL ADVENTURERS.

"... sheesh, Urist, we've really got to work on your swearing problem," Ester says mildly, wincing and working a finger around in her ear.

You ignore her (and Moru's own muffled cursing- right, she's got sensitive hearing too, huh?) and remain focused on the scenery behind you. Soon enough, you hear footsteps on snow; one adventurer steps on out of the brush, and the other one pops up from a nearby hilltop and oh goddammit it's just Red and Blue again, what the hell.

(Cont.)

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>>35865826
The blue swordswoman- the screamy one with the shoulderpads and the nopants, who'd even fight with their legs revealed like this?- speaks up first, levering her sword imperiously in your direction. "Alright, pipsqueak. One on one, you and me, right here in the middle of the lane. I'm getting you back for what you did to me in town," she snarls.

"Yeah. Better listen to her," the red swordswoman chuckles, her deeper voice accented and clipped. She SEEMS more reasonable, but... well, she's the shirtless one who kicked the shit out of her 'friend' while cackling like a loon, if you remember correctly. "I've got a thousand on you beating the shit out of her noob ass again."

Blue turns red and whirls on her... whatever the hell Red is to her, who even knows. Mutual kicking buddies? "Shut the FUCK up, Dao!" she snaps. "You are /not/ helping! You are the /opposite/ of helping! If I didn't have YOU weighing me down-"

"See?" Red- Dao- shrugs eloquently, the motion doing interesting things to her bandage-bound chest. "This is what I have to live with. Lian's bitching. Annoying teammates who do nothing but gripe. C'mon now."

... Armok save you, you don't have the strength to deal with this. You'd have to be drunk on your ass to deal with this.

[ ] [GUT PUNCH] Punch Blue- Lian?- while she's busy screaming at Dao.
[ ] [ACCEPT] Fine, you could do with a practice run, anyway. Agree to the 1-on-1 match.
[ ] [DECLINE] Are you kidding? You don't want to be tuckered out before fighting actual monsters.
[ ] [LOWEE] .... they DO know that Lowee's patron goddess wants to kick their asses to the moon for the shit they pulled in town, right?
[ ] [LOGIC] ....... aren't they really goddamn cold? And why do they even stick together if they hate each other so much?
[ ] [WRITE-IN]

>>35865881
>[ ] [LOGIC] ....... aren't they really goddamn cold? And why do they even stick together if they hate each other so much?

>>35865881
>[x] [LOGIC] ....... aren't they really goddamn cold? And why do they even stick together if they hate each other so much?
then
>[x] [LOWEE]

>>35865881
>LOWEE
Shouldn't you two be bothering a goddess or something?

>>35865881
> [Logic]

I mean, there are glitches and all, but their situation seems to be the actual result of a conscious decision. We don't want to catch whatever insanity they have.

Then [gut punch] while they're trying to explain/figure it out.

>>35865881
>[X] [GUT PUNCH]
>[X] [SUCKER-PUNCH DAO AS SHE LAUGHS]

We're Dwarf Fortress! Time to teach these graphics-heavy hussies what REAL difficulty is.

>>35865881
See if Ester has a way to contact Blanc. Might be fun to watch her push their faces in.

>"... sheesh, Urist, we've really got to work on your swearing problem," Ester says mildly"
Oh dear. I would have thought Ester would be more tolerant of our religious dedication. What better life is there than one lived by the examples set by our gods, after all?

>>35865881
>[X] [LOWEE] .... they DO know that Lowee's patron goddess wants to kick their asses to the moon for the shit they pulled in town, right?

>>35865881
[x] [LOWEE] .... they DO know that Lowee's patron goddess wants to kick their asses to the moon for the shit they pulled in town, right?
[x] [LOGIC] ....... aren't they really goddamn cold? And why do they even stick together if they hate each other so much?

followed by

[x] [GUT PUNCH] Punch Blue- Lian?- while she's busy screaming at Dao.

>>35865881
[Pocket sand] Followed by expeditious retreat! Nothing good can come of being associated with these two.

Fighting a duel is just how you end up with another two party members.

>>35866114
Seconding this.

>>35865881
>[ ] [GUT PUNCH] Punch Blue- Lian?- while she's busy screaming at Dao.
>[ ] [LOWEE] .... they DO know that Lowee's patron goddess wants to kick their asses to the moon for the shit they pulled in town, right?
>[ ] [LOGIC] ....... aren't they really goddamn cold? And why do they even stick together if they hate each other so much?
Let's have a calm, lovely conversation as we beat the shit out of her

>>35866159
Gut punch Lowee in the logic

>>35865881
>[X] [LOGIC]
>[X] [LOWEE]

Conscious of Ester and Moru's eyes on you, you flick your braids back over your shoulder and pin the doofuses in front of you with your most intimidating glare. Not that it seems to faze them. You NEVER seem to be able to faze anyone. It's almost enough to make you want to see if Ester can call up Blanc, but as much as you'd like to see a pissed-off goddess absolutely brutalize them to death, you're not sure you want to make the nation's leader even more convinced that every freelancer is terrible.

Besides, you'd much prefer to hold Blanc's rage over their heads as a threat, and you do so almost immediately. Lian- you'll never stop thinking of her as the screamy blue one- actually has the sense to go a little pale, but Dao simply snorts and crosses her arms. "Is that supposed to scare us? We're too popular for her to deal with, and we're damn good at our jobs. The Guild is powerless against freelancers like us. Tell her what you wish-"

Dao dodges out of the way as Lian literally just /draws live steel/ and cuts at her head, what the holy hell.

Moru's up on her feet immediately, her eyes wide- you can't help but do the same, who the fuck cuts at someone like that!?- but Ester merely tilts her head in curiosity. Heedless of all this, Lian bellows at Dao, spinning in that weird circular spin of hers. "Idiot! Are you daft!?" ... you have no idea how she's able to speak while spinning like a top. "She can still BAN us from Lowee!"

"So?" Dao leaps out of the way, practiced and easy. "We move onto other nations. Lowee has done nothing for us."

"I LIKE the snow!"

"Cry more."

"I'll make YOU cry little bitch tears!"

"Yes, you try that."

Holy hell, you could care less about their little tiffs, and you'll probably be here all day watching them fight. You clear your throat and attempt to insert some logic into this conversation: aren't they cold in that?

(Cont.)

>>35866544
They stop fighting, but they stare at you in absolute incomprehension. With a slightly uneasy feeling, you realize that Ester (in her short skirt and short sleeves) and Moru (in her stupid catgirl bikini thing) are staring at you, too, as if you're suddenly speaking a different language.

... after a few moments of awkward staring, you shift uncomfortably and change the subject. Alright, if they hate each other so much, why do they even bother sticking together?

"Because she's a thief without an ounce of originality in her," Dao snaps immediately, her fiery red mane seeming to flare up. "She follows me around like whipped cur, taking all that I have learned and twisting it to her own stupid ends-"

"Lies!" Lian slices at Dao's head again /like a goddamn psychopath/, but the other swordswoman is suddenly nowhere near the attack. "YOU'RE just jealous that I'm doing your job better than you ever could! You're afraid of change!"

"Honorless cur!"

"Mindless bitch!"

(Cont.)

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588 KB GIF

>>35866574
You squint as they begin fighting like rabid dogs, slicing and dodging with their respective weapons so quickly that it looks like some sort of choreographed dance routine. This is absolutely ridiculous.

"... nah. They're lucky," Ester suddenly replies. To your surprise, she's grinning happily, looking at the two idiots like a mother watching her two idiot kids at play, blissfully unaware of the horrors of reality. "It's great, having a legendary rival like that. They oughta treasure it while they can!"

... well, that's good and all, but you don't have time for this, so you wait until they take a break, glaring at each other over their swords, before waltzing on in and slamming your fist into Lian's gut, sending her sprawling to the ground with a choked curse. Dao laughs uproariously until you give her the same treatment, and she falls on top of her stupid rival, cursing even louder- HER midriff wasn't armored.

You turn away from them and trudge off into the snowfields, telling your party members to get a move on. You've all wasted enough time here already.

Moru looks back to the MOBA pile. "What about-"

Seriously. They'll be fine, you haven't even entered the dungeon field yet.

"You KNOW they're going to hold a grudge," Ester says mildly, not even glancing back at the downed swordswomen.

Fine, you'll just have your own stupid miniboss squad hounding you every turn and- you freeze in your tracks, clawing your gauntleted hands down your face.

God/dammit/. Now you'll NEVER have any peace.


[TO BE CONTINUED NEXT THREAD]

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>>35866589
ALRIGHT, this is as good a place as any to stop (and also it's 1 am on a weeknight), so we'll continue this next thread!

Next thread's going to be on Monday, 11/3, at 7 pm EST. And it's definitely going to have to be on that night, since I won't be able to run the thread AFTER that until the 10th or 11th.

Thanks for participating, guys, and I hope you enjoyed the thread! Updates and schedule changes will as always be at https://twitter.com/BlorpQuest . Sorry for the unstable running times lately, and I'll do my best to pick up the pace later on!

>>35866623
Thanks for running!

>>35866623
thanks, Blorp!