48 Hours Remain EditionYou are Shax Gloombreaker, mortal blade of the Sea Mom, Dragonslayer, Demigod of the elemental plane of Light, and you're well on the way to ascension to true godhood! You've just got a couple of things to take care of, first. Like this rod thing.You Have:>24 Maid Points>92 Happiness Points>-24 Wood Elf Reputation>A sudden realization that Allonces' Mom is super hot>Plot Armor Rating of 32>Shax's Stuff! So you can keep track: http://pastebin.com/U3hKZfAd>Shax Company!: http://pastebin.com/mZgVD5yH>Shax Ability Tree: http://pastebin.com/aBfqv1vP>I'm the boss! Points: 0>Pearls: 6You're back in Manderlay, in the forest. The plan is to get the rod to the cultists and get out asap. You've got the third elven orb thing still, and haven't busted it open yet. No reason to, right? Squidface is still back in elf country dealing with that elf lich thing he kept complaining about, but everyone else is here. What's the plan, boss?>Just walk up to the city with your whole army and be like 'hey I need to talk to some cultists in secret'.>Sneak into the city with a team of experts!>Have Blaise take you into the city formally.
>>34838120AW SHIT IS THAT A FINISHED COMMISSION I SEE?Also, >Have Blaise take you into the city formally.The sooner we befriend them, the sooner we can get everyone caught up in our pace and somehow agree to live on giant turtles.
>>34838120!>Have Blaise take you into the city formally.
>>34838120Hang on, we got a boss point last thread I thought?http://archive.moe/tg/thread/34676456/#34681568
>>34838120>Have Blaise take you into the city formally.
>>34838120>Have Blaise take you into the city formally.Yep
Alright! Formal march then!Also, sure you have a boss point.Give me a d20 check for reasons.
Rolled 9 (1d20)>>34838387Time for critafails!
Rolled 10 (1d20)>>34838387I will give you a d20 because you told me to, and because the results may be funny. Are those good enough reasons?
Rolled 16 (1d20)>>34838387
>>34838434Dang, I guess you succeed. Okay.Writing.
Rolled 13 (1d20)>>34838458I'm sorry. Were we supposed to fuck up hilariously?
Your goblin senses tingle, and from the side you see a half-orc come barrelling out of the underbrush. He brandishes two swords, and you manage to get your sword up in time to block it."Sinclaire!" Blaise calls out in shock, running over to the manservant, and tackling him in a hug, "You're back!"He pats the girl on the head, "Yes, mistress, I'm back. Shax's reactions seem to have improved. Has she been taking good care of you?""More like I've been taking good care of her," the maid scoffs, "Thank you for the ribbon, Sinclaire. Now, we've got business we need to take care of! I was going to escort Shax to Manderlay, so she can conclude some business." The maid puts her hands on her hips proudly.Sinclaire 'tsk, tsk's her. "A good servant doesn't reveal their master's plans. You have much to learn, mistress." The half orc then sniffs the air. "Undead about, yeah?"You wave, "Nah, that's just Squidface's stink.""That abomination is still around?" Why does no one like Squidface?! He's the nicest guy! Sinclaire seems horrified. "Mistress, are you sure it's a good idea to...?"The maid doesn't even bother responding, instead opting to give him a withering glare. "Hey, Sinclaire!" You call out to him, "Have you ever ridden a big lizard before?">You've earned Sinclaire's approval! This half-orc approves of your ownership of Blaise. Getting on his good side is bound to be useful!>You've earned the Powerful Guest Character achievement! Sometimes an NPC joins up and you can't control him and he runs around killing everything in one hit and you're like 'daaaang' but he is also stealing all your exp. This is one of those times.The three of you are on the dinosaur moments later, thundering towards Manderlay. Blaise tries to tell you about the city, but you also have a hard time listening/caring.>Go through the main gate.>Go to one of the noble's estates outside.>Go through the adventurer's gate to the side.
>>34838808>>Go through the adventurer's gate to the side.... What is this, the Servant's entrance only for absurdly powerful people? Can't have adventurers mixing with the common folk.
>>34838808>Go through the adventurer's gate
>>34838808>Go to one of the noble's estates outside.
>>34838808>>Go through the adventurer's gate to the side.
>>34838808>>Go through the adventurer's gate to the side.There better be a red carpet, though, since we saved the city and all.
Alright! A triumphant entrance! Give me a d20 roll.
>>34839040This is the gate I least expect red carpet on. Adventurers track all sorts of shit in with their muddy, disgusting boots.
Rolled 20 (1d20)>>34839101
Rolled 10 (1d20)>>34839101Time for glory, Shax style!
Rolled 14 (1d20)>>34839101Please be something cool!!!>>34839107Wish granted.
>>34839107Of course we'd crit on something as minor as this.
>>34839156>minor>entering a city using the entrance all the badasses useThis is the most important time to crit! A first impression!
>>34839186>>34839107I hope we do the spinturtle entrance, only competently this time.
>>34838120That fucking picture man. It is just too good. Mind telling us who did it? I might have to throw fistfuls of money at them for character portraits.
>>34839212Maybe on a Turtlesaurus Rex...
So on a scale of 1-10 how likely do you think it is that Sinclair is a Sword Saint? I am going to go with a soild 8.
The gate comes up, and you feel your heart race. This was 'enemy territory' for the lognest period of time. The big base. The impenetrable, invincible fortress. And you're just riding up to it! On a dinosaur! When you get near the gate, armed guards are clearly agitated, until Sinclaire hops down. The man is apparently quite familiar to the guards, and they quickly open the gate.Adventurers gawk at you, a strange goblin with a sword as big as most people, riding into town on the back of a dinosaur, with a known noble girl dressed as a maid. It's a sight most people probably would never have expected to see in their entire lives. Once inside, you gawk at the massive, sprawling city. A true city. The massive stone structures are a bit dirty, but there are so MANY of them. It is hard to not be impressed."Welcome to Manderlay, Shax. You may be a notorious villain, but you also saved this place, you know? It is okay to take pride in that." And you do. You do take some pride in it. It's only standing because you stopped a demonic invasion, and that feels good somehow.Still, it was time to go hunting for cultists. You hope down off your Dinosaur, handing the lizard over to the flummoxed stablemaster. Giving a rough description of the cultists you're looking for to Sinclaire, he heads out into the city to hunt for them.Now, how are you going to find a cultist organization as the most suspicious person in the city without tipping who they are and where their location is?You trip over a sewer grate, the metal falling away and crashing onto someone. "The Sea Mother preserve us!" A voice says from down below. Oh, that was easy.>Jump down. Hi I'm Shax.>REPORT TO THE AUTHORITIES>Just drop the rod in there and tell Blaise you wanna see the city.>Ignore the voice, hit the streets, try to hunt them down! [You will lose exp for choosing this option, you idiots. Actually, you can't even choose it at all!]
>>34839954>>Jump down. Hi I'm Shax.Ugh. I so want to just drop the rod and hang out with the maid, but I can't trust that these guys aren't REALLY bad at their jobs...
Also, sorry for the slowness. Was resolving lunch.
>>34839954>>Just drop the rod in there and tell Blaise you wanna see the city.IS THIS A DEITO???
>>34839954>Jump down. Hi I'm Shax.
>>34839954>Just drop the rod in there and tell Blaise you wanna see the city.
>>34839954>Jump down. Hi I'm Shax.Sup.
>>34839954>Jump down. Hi I'm Shax.Let's get this taken care of properly before we do anything else.
>>34839954As much as I'd love to go on a date with Shax, we have to make sure these cultists do things properly.>Jump down. Hi I'm Shax.
>>34840237>on a date>with ShaxSuddenly I realize Shax would be Shax's best partner.Anyway, writing.
>>34840266Could the world handle such a thing as more than one Shax, though?
>>34840398It had better be capable of that. God Shax has got omnipresence.
Wow. These guys aren't good at sneaking. Not like you! You look around a bit as Blaise watches you dumb founded. "Shax, what are you doing? Shax, don't. Shax, stop crawling into the sewers." She pinches her nose as you wiggling into the hole and drop down, landing on some poor guy. With your dark vision you can easily see the schlubs you're dealing with. It is about five guys in hooded robes, standing around in the sewer. There is a ladder near the entrance, suggesting they use this to climb up and down often."Hi! I'm Shax," You wave at them, "Mortal blade of the Sea Mom. I got a delivery for you." The cultists are speechless for a moment, and then they all start talking at once.'is this entrapment' 'holy shit a goblin' 'that sword is so much larger than our sacrificial daggers I cannot even believe it'Then Blaise lands in the sewers as well, wrinkling her nose and holding her axe to the side. "Jeez, Shax, what are you doing down here anyway? Oh." She rolls her eyes, "The cultists were right here? Are you serious? How did you find them anyway?"You give Blaise a thumbs up, "Luck." Turning back to the cultists, you grab the rod and hold it out, "Okay you guys, the Sea Mom told me you'd know what to do with this. I was gonna hand it right over, but I gotta ask. What the heck are you going to do with this?!" You weren't doubting them. You weren't. But this was the least professional cult you have ever seen.There is a gasp, and the one you landed on gets up to his feet, "Th-that's the fabled Rod of Mercurius Malignity!" You highly doubt that is the real name. They explain the details of the ritual to you, much to your boredom, but there is one point at the end that stuck with you. "Of course, we'd need a magnus capable of focusing the aetherial energies in such a way. Or an appropriately powerful locus."You don't know what any of that crap is, but you know what it means.>So you don't have it. I can help find it?>YOU'RE ON YOUR OWN, BOYS.
>>34840847>>YOU'RE ON YOUR OWN, BOYS.I'm sure you guys can handle it. Let's see if Blaise knows any neat places to visit. With food and entertainment and lemonade.
>>34840847>So you don't have it. I can help find it?This is the cult equivalent of a goth clique, isn't it?Ah jeez, this is just delaying the ascension more. Damn sidequests.
>>34840847>a magnus capable of focusing the aetherial energies in such a wayPretty sure we picked up one of those. Hes even got squid bits! That's sure to be a plus right?
>>34840847>>So you don't have it. I can help find it?>>34840916It is, however, enabling TURTLE WORLD by helping the flood, so I guess it's ok?
>>34840847>So you don't have it. I can help find it?We've got God Magic and Pearls, maybe we can do something with those to make this work. A door to our realm sounds pretty locusy. Or ask Squidface, he's good at this stuff and might be magnusy enough.
>>34840916Don't worry about time. I've got the whole weekend off.
>>34840847>So you don't have it. I can help find it?C'mon, where are you gonna find powerful locusts when you're in the sewers where there's nothing for them to eat? These guys are clueless.>>34840915Nothing stopping us from making the search for totally important part-time cultists and cultist accessories into a whole lot of window shopping first. No better way to find something you're looking for than looking in a whole lot of places.
>>34840847>'is this entrapment' 'holy shit a goblin' 'that sword is so much larger than our sacrificial daggers I cannot even believe it'lol
>>34840847Obviously, this sidequest should involve retrieving a locus from the cult's leader, who is trapped inside a gym locker.>>So you don't have it. I can help find it?
>>34841022This is an excellent suggestion.
So you wanna hunt for the stuff? Okay. Do you wanna do the window shopping while hunting thing, or do you wanna scour the city for clues rather than window shop? Quick five minute vote.
>>34841229>window shoppingThere are cool things to gawk at.
>>34841229Nothing weird about a couple adventurers out and about, asking every shop in town where to find a powerful magical locus while eating ice cream and holding hands. Shit's absolutely par for the course for adventurers. Nothing suspicious at all about it.
>>34841229Window shop while hunting, Shax is the best at multitasking.
>>34841229Window shopping for sure.
>>34841229Window shop, 'course.
Alright. That looks pretty unanimous. Okay! So. Give me a d100, and also what would you be interested in buying when you roll. I'll take the first five rolls. General item statements is fine, but a specific item could be vetoed if it is a bit too silly.
Rolled 34 (1d100)>>34841383We have to get a really awesome hat.
Rolled 8 (1d100)>>34841383Pretty things!
Rolled 49 (1d100)>>34841383HERE WE GOAlso, I would like food. Fantasy food, accompanied by pictures of food from Vanillaware games.
>>34841420We're going to find alllll the ugly things!
Rolled 62 (1d100)>>34841383>>34841427Eating delicious food is always a good plan.
Rolled 41 (1d100)>>34841383Some jewelry, whatever we need for Blaise and Shax to do each other's hair, pretty dresses, and swords.
Rolled 72 (1d100)>>34841383Engagement rings of course.Maybe some cool trinkets I guess?
Rolled 15 (1d100)>>34841383Let's find a cat for Blaise!
>>34841498>this is the guy who wonSometimes I wonder, 4chan.Food as well, then.Writing!
>>34841383Oh, I just realized, if there are bags of holding or equivalent available that seems like the sort of thing Shax would be interested in.Gigantic capacity for loot has gotta be appealing, even now that Shax is a total big-shot.
>>34841530Oh? You're taking the sixth roll instead of having Shax sample the local cuisine?
>>34841659Nah, I am taking local cuisine. And the jewelry shopping.
>>34841530What's there to wonder? We've been all about getting Shax hooked up with Blaise for a good while now.
>>34841686Shiny things still distract Shax of course.
"Alright, whatever, I'll go find you that junk." You really didn't trust them to get the job done, and you had promised Sea Mom you'd get this thing going. If you fall through on the deal you might not own all the turtles anymore. And that was just unacceptable. You grab Blaise's sleeve, and tug on it while pointing up. "Okay. Show me where the locusses are. And the magnets."Blaise pokes her cheek with a finger, while tilting her head, as if lost in thought. "Most magni would have nothign to do with a cult like this, and as for locii, your best bet is probably in the foreign districts' glassworking shops. I'll show you the way, come on." You both climb out of the sewers, and head towards the foreign district, Blaise excitedly telling you about the landmarks around the city. She seemed fairly well known around her, lots of people stopping to greet her and plenty of waves to be had."Jeez, Blaise, you're callin' an awful lot of attention onto me." It kinda made you uncomfortable. You're not used to being around this many surface dwellers, to be honest. "Where the heck is this foreigner's district or whatever? Let's hurry?"As you're asking the question Sinclaire arrives from the shadows. "Greetings, Shax. I've located the cult, and in less than two hours, I might add." He gives a small chuckle.Blaise looks a bit nervous, "Th-that's great, Sinclaire. You're such a hard worker." You just sort of look at him and say nothing."Don't you want to know where they are?" He looks at you, "Oh man you've found them already haven't you what the hell"After that, you arrive in the foreign district, and Blaise takes you to all her favorite food stands. Chicken Marsalla with angel hair noodles for lunch, a sweet souffle for dessert. It was a nice, heavy meal. You've never felt so full!After that, you arrive at a glassworker.wat buy>A matching pair of rings, silver with a green stone embedded.>Matching pair of earrings. Golden crescent moons.
>>34841920>A matching pair of rings, silver with a green stone embedded.
>>34841920>A matching pair of rings, silver with a green stone embedded.Rings are nice
>>34841920>Matching pair of earrings. Golden crescent moons.
>>34841920>>A matching pair of rings, silver with a green stone embedded.I like green and silver more than gold. They're simply prettier colors. That's all there is to it.
>>34841920>A matching pair of earrings sunburst turtles and bears lounging (reclining) on crescent moons.
>>34841920>>A matching pair of rings, silver with a green stone embedded.Green is a color that some turtles are and also a color that some goblins are. Moons are alright, but we lived underground for most of our lives and why the heck should we care about moons?
>>34841920>>A matching pair of rings, silver with a green stone embedded.
>>34841999They also match nicely.
>>34841999Of course anon, only for prettiness. We understand perfectly.
The most important decision in the entire quest is made.You've sealed your fates. Nothing will ever be the same.Writing.
>>34842200I don't believe you chief.
>>34842200I thought that was the ribbon vs choker decision?
>>34842200OWQ really just a very in dept maid simulator.
>>34838120>same eye color>same bowSuspicious.
>>34842285Meido points are a hell of a drug.
>>34842213Didn't we fail that one?
>>34842335What if Shax and Blaise are cousins?
>>34842337Anons chose the tactical choice for some reason, and not the proof of ownership.
>>34842200>We just got Married to our MaidThis is the greatest thing ever.
>>34842449Ehh, I kinda wanted to go the Sitri route, honestly. Oh well, I guess I can accept this too.
>>34842478But Stiri likes guys though.
>>34842437Tactical? No, ribbons are just a billion times cuter.
>>34842478While Sitri is cool, I don't think she fits Shax very well. Also at this point there was zero chance of that route anyway.
>>34842478MAID IS TRUE LOVE.MAID IS LIFE.ELF IS SIN.SITRI IS BROSBANDO.
>>34842523ELF A brat
>>34842478I almost thought I was alone in thinking this. I'm glad to have a bro.>>34842501I don't think Sitri cares what your gender is, she doesn't seem like the type to care.
>>34842559>I don't think Sitri cares what your gender is, she doesn't seem like the type to care.But she does though she has a running joke were she complains that she only gets interest from women.
>>34842559I've been wanting to go the goat route since I read her introduction, but alas I was too late, by the time I caught up with the quest the colective already decided on Blaise and so I didn't even try to vote for Satyress end.
Sinclaire is watching all this with an amused expression.You end up purchasing the rings, giving the other one to Blaise as a reward for 'being a good maid who showed you where good food is'. Inspecting the item between two fingers, Blaise makes a 'hmmm' sound. "Shax? I mean, mistress? This would function as an excellent locii. We've already purchased it, so why not use it?" You shrug, you bought them cause they were shiny and pretty, but if it accomplishes the quest, that's great, too!You rush back to the cultists, not stopping for more shopping or eating, and get into the sewers once more. The cultists are all a little intimidated by the newly arrived half-orc, but they don't say anything. You and Blaise bring out your rings, and show them to the cultists."Oh man, that is easily a level ten receptacle! It could handle a ritual as powerful as the one the Sea Mother's holy implement would require. How did you find such a powerful receptacle in such a short amount of time?"You give the cultist a thumbs up a second time, and excitedly mutter one word again, "Luck."The cultist leader sort of looks at you with an impassive look, like you're just pulling his leg. The sort of 'are you fucking serious' expression that only someone completely weary with the world could make, a truly 'I'm done, I'm so fucking done' kind of look that would cause disbelief to manifest itself and fully take form as an avatar of utter disdain with the fortunes of others that could only arise from someone who has been exposed to this kind of shit their entire life. The expression of a NPC. "Right."One of the other, even more lame, cultists looks at the ring. "Oh, wow! These are good enough that we only need one of them. You can still use it after the ritual, of course, but it will have some lingering effects. Mostly ones involving your aetheric affinity with water." You don't know what that means. "It'll jam up your ring with magic." Oh.>Use yours.>Use Blaise's.
>>34842692I have no idea what this means.[x] Use both
>>34842692>[X] Pick at random
>>34842692>[X] Paper Scissors Rock with Blaise.
>>34842692>>34842719I support this.
>>34842692Use both, obviously. Would the effect be weaker? If yes, since I am a powergaming git, use ours.
>>34842692>Use Blaise's.A magicified ring can be our wedding gift to her.
>>34842692Blaise should get it because she has ice powers.Water + Ice = more ice>Use Blaise's.
>>34842692>Use yours.Blaise is ice, we are water.
>>34842692>The sort of 'are you fucking serious' expression that only someone completely weary with the world could make, a truly 'I'm done, I'm so fucking done' kind of look that would cause disbelief to manifest itself and fully take form as an avatar of utter disdain with the fortunes of others that could only arise from someone who has been exposed to this kind of shit their entire life. The expression of a NPCI am crying right now.My ribs hurt so bad from laughter.Oh god it hurts.
>>34842692>Use Blaise's.I don't really get it but if they involve OUR affinity with water then why not?
>>34842692>Use yours.MAGIC RINGS!
Looks like Blaise slightly won? Okay. Give me a d20 roll.
>>34842692So it becomes a +X to water stuff?>Use yours.We are the seamom's mortal blade ro whatever, we have to be good at water shit.
Rolled 12 (1d20)>>34842973MAID DICE
Rolled 20 (1d20)>>34842973*drumroll*
Rolled 7 (1d20)>>34842973ugh, fiiiine>if nat20 use ours
Rolled 17 (1d20)>>34842973>>34842994Nice.
Rolled 14 (1d20)>>34842994wow, okay, we can't let blaise keep that ring, that belongs to the lLrd of Turtles, clearly
>>34842994These don't matter crits are fucking cracking me up, you guys.
>>34843016Silly anon, our wife needs a connection to our own plane of course.
>>34843016Fuck you, that is HER ring and she is keeping it!!!!!!
>>34843016Too late. Meido is Turtle Lord now.
>>34843016Maybe the ritual goes so awesomely that the magic spreads to both rings...
>>34842994>Blaise is now Sea Mom
>>348430301. She already has a connection to our plane2. We don't actually have any power over water yet. Just Turtles and Light.
>>34843058Please anon. She's sea-daughter-in-law.
Gonna be a sec, finishing dinner prep.
>>34842996>if nat20 use oursHaha.
>>34843187Can't blame me for trying
>>34843215I bet Blaise will engage maximum over blush from our girt now.
>>34843442She hasn't really been blushing because of us as far as I can tell, honestly, I'm kinda surprised.
>>34843679I think he means girth, anon.
>>34843672That's because all the Shax x Blaise is in the minds of us, the viewers.
>>34843679Gift. Damnit.>>34843702This also works.>>34843746Shush, you.
"Alright, stand back! We're going to begin the ritual." You do as he bids, and get back quite a bit so that you don't distract the cultists from whatever they're doing. They take the rod, place it on a small pedestal and spend literally forever marking out a rune based sigil around it. It is the kind of event where you're just standing around talking to Blaise and Sinclaire about random things because there is no time skip function.Turns out Sinclaire is ex-military surprising no one. He became a butler when Blaise's family saved his life, and went on elusive butler training, a special hidden camp that only a few know about.Blaise talked about her favorite pets. She apparently has owned three dogs in her time, all giant schnauzers. There was Barklington, Rufflington, and Wooflington. Wooflington still lives, though the other two passed away when she was twelve. It was apparently very depressing.After they started the ritual looked like it was going to take a stupidly long time. If there were guards alerted to the presence of this cult, you might have to defend against waves of them here, protecting the weak, easily dispatched cultists from their disciplinary actions. "Don't worry, Shax!" The leader calls out, "This should only take about five minutes!" Precisely five minutes pass, and the ritual completes. "This is astounding. The ritual has succeeded beyond our wildest imaginations!""Okay," you respond, "Give me Blaise's ring back." They hand it over immediately. It feels... weird. Before you give it to Blaise, Sinclaire stops you and inspects it."Fascinating," The half-orc mutters, "Not only has it been infused with aetheric properties aligning with water, it seems to have been connected to the Sea Mother's domain itself."Whatever the means. Blaise snatches the ring out of Sinclaire's hand and puts it on.So, what now?>Alright! Let's get ascended!>Let's bother these nerds and see what else they know.
>>34844118>Alright! Let's get ascended!It's time! Everyone get hype!
>>34844118>>Let's bother these nerds and see what else they know.SIDEQUESTS DON'T STOP FOR ANYTHING.
>>34844118>Alright! Let's get ascended!Time to fuck us up a Hungerer.
>>34844118>Let's bother these nerds and see what else they know.
>>34844118>Let's bother these nerds and see what else they know.Hrm hrm
>>34844118>Alright! Let's get ascended!Time to give our race a proper afterlife.
>>34844118>Alright! Let's get ascended!Time to slay gods and achieve maid end.
>>34844118>Alright! Let's get ascended!
>>34844118>He became a butler when Blaise's family saved his life, and went on elusive butler training, a special hidden camp that only a few know about.Yo, wait, does he know our butler? Are they hardened buttling veterans, brothers forged in blood through their trials deep in the trenches of Dumbwaiteristan?
>>34844118Wait, did we just make an artifact that lets SeaMom possess/avatarize the wearer?This could be fun.
>>34844430>Sea Mom ASSUMES DIRECT CONTROL of Blaise to talk with us>It is right after they consummated their wedding.Oh wow, talk about awkward.also Lewd.
>>34844430How else is Blaise going to help us fight the Hungerer?
>>34844463By ascending with us? She agreed to do that during the beach episode.
>Blaise helps Shax kill Hungerer>Shax helps Blaise kill Sea MomWe're doing this, right?
>>34844694>kill Sea MomThat kind of shit isn't welcome around here.You should leave and never come back.
>>34844694>Turning on Sea Mom.I'm sorry, you appear to be in the wrong quest anon. I don't know which quest in which you backstab your greatest benefactors you come from, but kindly return there.
>>34844694>Killing her Mother-in-LawWhy would Blaise do that?
>>34844694>Wanting to kill best mom.
>>34844818Why does the knot have to be so complicated? I don't get it. Pls explain hanging physics.
>>34845018You need the coils so there's enough friction to hold the knot together.
You bid them a quick goodbye, patting them on the shoulder after assuring them that their plot significance was horribly over. They didn't even get names. That's just depressing. After climbing the ladder, you get on your dinosaur and ride back out. Blaise and Sinclaire jabber about the ring when you head back to the forest, and get to witch boy's house.You crash the orb to the ground."Thank you for freeing me from my prison, mortal!" Twin gods pop out, a girl and a boy. You wave your hand at them dismissively, and get the other deities to show up. Then they talk a about their past: 'oh hey how's it been? what's it been? several centuries?' 'oh you know trapped in an arcane prison. how bout you?' 'same here! what a coincidence' You finally get to the point that matters.The twins look a bit surprised, "What? She wants to ascend? Does she meet all the prerequisite requirements to ascend?"A god you freed nods excitedly, "Yep! There some things she doesn't have, but they are more than made up for with the sheer amount of aetheric power she's got at her disposal.""Oh. So, what, we're going to help her ascend, then?"You put your hands on your hips and point at Blaise. "Yep. Her, too."The gods all sort of collectively turn at you and make a simultaneous 'are you crazy' expression, followed by a shrug. "Alright, whatever you say. There are a couple of ways we can go about this.">Direct power font ascension. Burn all your pearls to ascend directly to the plane of avarice. The most direct confrontation possible.>Worship based ascension. Requires no pearls. You'll arrive at the entrance, and can only exist there through the power of FRIENDSHIP. The damage you take from the Hungerer will negatively effect them. But you'll have pearls.>Artifact based ascension. Burns all your pearls. Transforms some weapons into holy implements. These items become significantly stronger, but you are tied to their existence. If they break, you're done.
>>34845065You usually want to do 7-9 coils though
>>34845213>Artifact based ascension. Burns all your pearls. Transforms some weapons into holy implements. These items become significantly stronger, but you are tied to their existence. If they break, you're done.The Godslayer Sword! That is all we need.
>>34845213Can we get a bit more explanation on these options?
>>34845213>>Artifact based ascension. Burns all your pearls. Transforms some weapons into holy implements. These items become significantly stronger, but you are tied to their existence. If they break, you're done.Duh
>>34845213>Worship based ascension. Requires no pearls. You'll arrive at the entrance, and can only exist there through the power of FRIENDSHIP. The damage you take from the Hungerer will negatively effect them. But you'll have pearls.It's the most dramatic one. And we can use our pearls to fuck up the Hungerer.
>>34845213>>34845213Somehow I feel like no matter what things will go horrible wrong with a single nat 1
>>34845213>Artifact based ascension. Burns all your pearls. Transforms some weapons into holy implements. These items become significantly stronger, but you are tied to their existence. If they break, you're done.The biggest and best sword.
>>34845213>Worship based ascension. Requires no pearls. You'll arrive at the entrance, and can only exist there through the power of FRIENDSHIP. The damage you take from the Hungerer will negatively effect them. But you'll have pearls.Yeeee
>>34845213>>Artifact based ascension. Burns all your pearls. Transforms some weapons into holy implements. These items become significantly stronger, but you are tied to their existence. If they break, you're done.>not wanting the holy sword of Shax>Or the chalice of ultimate shax perception
>>34845213>Artifact based ascension. Burns all your pearls. Transforms some weapons into holy implements. These items become significantly stronger, but you are tied to their existence. If they break, you're done.Pearls are a crutch. At her very heart, Shax is a swordgoblin. And if we give her a literally divine giant sword, there truly will be nothing her cutter cannot cuttle.
>>34845213>>Artifact based ascension. Burns all your pearls. Transforms some weapons into holy implements. These items become significantly stronger, but you are tied to their existence. If they break, you're done.Seems the most appropriate. Divine Titan Sword is a go!
>>34845213>Artifact based on the sord
>>34845213>Artifact based ascension. Burns all your pearls. Transforms some weapons into holy implements. These items become significantly stronger, but you are tied to their existence. If they break, you're done.Will we be able to make for Artifacts as time goes on?
>>34845213Man, SORD and FREND are both pretty Shax-y ways of going about doing this.
>>34845213Does artifact based work kind of like goblin souls for the hungerer? So say people give us cool objects for us to get power in the same way the he eats goblin souls?
>>34845213>Direct power font ascension. Burn all your pearls to ascend directly to the plane of avarice. The most direct confrontation possible.Shax don't need nobody nor nothin' to be awesome.
>>34845213>>Artifact based ascension. Burns all your pearls. Transforms some weapons into holy implements. These items become significantly stronger, but you are tied to their existence. If they break, you're done.Like our weapon could ever break!
>>34845407Congratulations, you are now some future Adventurer's "Destroy this artifact!" macguffin!
>>34845213>Worship based ascension. Requires no pearls. You'll arrive at the entrance, and can only exist there through the power of FRIENDSHIP. The damage you take from the Hungerer will negatively effect them. But you'll have pearls.
>>34845213>Direct power font ascension.Hard mode go!
>>34845213>Direct power font ascension. Burn all your pearls to ascend directly to the plane of avarice. The most direct confrontation possible.No dependencies, no feedback, just pure force of nature Shax power.Why on God's green and soon to be very blue earth would we tie our existence to anything when that's the entire reason we're ascending?
>>34845213>Artifact based ascension. Burns all your pearls. Transforms some weapons into holy implements. These items become significantly stronger, but you are tied to their existence. If they break, you're done.BUT FIRST, UPGRADES AND SHOPPINGShax will have 3 primary symbols: The Giant Sword, the Cape, and the Bootscont. because I'm still thinking and I want my vote in.
Looks like artifact is the choice then.Your sword is the obvious choice, right? So select one more item to get super charged. You have:>Ring of silver and emerald>Bracelet of Blinding Strike! >Mask of being huge! >A Belt of Ogre Strength! >Power Bracelet!>Holy Sword!>Chalice of True Seeing! >Fire Resistant Cape! >A complimentary grappling hook.>>34845390No. These are all temporary methods of retaining power in the Hungerer's plane. If you get control of the plane, you'll decide how you want to retain divine power. Loot based worship is always an option for a greed based god.
>>34845474>Ring of silver and emerald
>>34845474>>Fire Resistant Cape!This was our very first magic item, I believe.
>>34845474>Mask of being huge!Because come on guys, if that mask already makes us huge... IT'LL MAKE US GODLY HUGE!!!
>>34845474WAIT, see if Blacksmith-chan in our castle can upgrade the cape!Also, Blaise is definitely her axe and ring
>>34845436>Implying they can destroy our Sord when it's protected by the Sea Mom and Maido>implying they would even destroy it when we are the only reason there will even be non-Sea-Mom eldritch horror life.They destroy our artifacts, they DESERVE to be enslaved to eldritch monstrosities or drown when our Island Turtles all either die out or stop entering the world from our Plane.Destroying our Artifact would quite literally mean the death of all Non-Sea Mom affiliated life.
>>34845474>Loot based worshipThat's the most Shax thing ever. We've been doing side quests for random loot since the beginning of the quest.
>>34845474>Power Bracelet!We've had it as long as our sword and it kind of let's us use our sword so...
>Fire Resistant Cape!See the cape in >>34838120 ? That's our iconic SHAX CAPE. It is awesome.
>>34845474>A Belt of Ogre Strength!Shax will be the most swole goblin with the best sword.
>>34845474>Ring of silver and emeraldWedding Ring = Bullshit Power when Near Maid.
>>34845517I honestly think we could probably use the Sord without it now.
>>34845474>Ring of silver and emeraldMaximum maid teamups.
>>34845482No, that would be the Power Bracelet. You know, the thing Squidface gave us so we could even wield our Sword.
>>34845474>>34845493Speaking of which, I actually have a few ideas:>Cape of Fire ResistanceUpgrade with Dragon skin/leather>Mask of being HugeUpgrade with Dragon Skull>Holy Sword +RingReplace pommel with ring>Bracelet + BraceletPair them up as a set!
>>34845474belt of ogre str
>>34845559Oh, you're right.The first magic item we properly looted, then.
>>34845503>Kuo-Toa who want all surface dwellers dead do it.
>>34845561>Chalice + GlarestoneAlso add in part/the entire Spring-creating Crystal from the forest. THE CUP OVERFLOWETH
>>34845474I finally finished that comic!Sorry about the scattershot quality, the first two panels were drawn back when I had a tablet, then I moved and couldn't lost it so I drew with a mouse.And then I got sick so the last 3 panels are kinda ass but whatever.
>>34845474We can super-charge things we own, right? Then I vote we super-charge Blaise
>>34845627I love you.
>>34845590Sea Mom would slap their shit for it.Sea Mom doesn't -care- if all surface Dwellers die, she just wants the world covered in water and whatever horrible abominations she can think up, we love Turtles, which are sea creatures, and we love Sea Mom, and she at least likes us, so no, she would slap the shit out of them for even thinking about it.
Alright. I'll tally up the votes and write. Last post for the night. I'm super distracted, so. Wait on it!
>>34845627>cleric is a bartenderNice joke. I'll use that in my next campaign.
>>34845561wait, I got it>Bracelet + Bracelet +BootsTurn them into these Haste/Strength boots of...stomping
>>34845681You sure are trusting.
>>34845561>Chalice + Scrying Crystal + Forest Spring CrystalHAS to make some sort of All-seeing spring
>>34845748Shax has an Alhoon for a best friend.
>>34845786an abnormally eccentric one
>>34845474>Power Bracelet!Remember our origins, guys. As it was in the beginning, so it shall be in the end.
So... Why did you guys decide to bind your very existence to a physical object you're going to use to repeatedly hit something very strong?That doesn't really sound like a good idea.
>>34845895I AM THE BONE OF MY SWORDI AM A SWORDI AM STRONK
>>34845895Lich King did it.
>>34845895how is it not a good idea?
>>34845895If it breaks we're fucked anyway.Also, I choose to believe after all the shit we've hit with it that the sword is indestructable.
>>34845895Because Shax IS the Sword and all is right with the world.Sord best waifu
>>34845895THIS BODY SURELY ISMADE OF SWORDS.
>>34845895All we need is one nat 1 and we're fucked.
>>34845701Well, everyone else seems to have forgotten Blacksmith-chan
>>34845895Because vote Sord 2014.In Sord we trust.Believe in Sord who believes in You.Who do you think Sord is?!
>>34845895Didn't we get our sword enchanted to bear pretty much indestructable, long ago?
>>34846010Yep, Earth Elemental with a Earth core made it really fucking hard to break.And then we drowned it in Dragon blood.
>>34846010Yeah, and my thought process was that supercharging the sword would supercharge that too.
>>34846033The Sword becomes a manifestation of Shax's will to succeed, or hunger, maybe both.It basically does become indestructible.
>>34846098>Quest: Destroy the Sword of Shax Gloombreaker>You must weaken the Sword, to do so, you must Feed Shax the goblin until she is no longer capable of eating food, also break her will, also satisfy her lust for Loot, and raiding, and Maid points.
>>34845927Of course.a lich would.do it, its a better phylactery.I guess it just feels like something someone impersonating or usurping a god does, as opposed to a proper ascension into godhood.
Okay, your sword is upgraded! It becomes a LEGENDARY ARTIFACT. It is now known as The Gloom Breaker, does enhanced damage to shadow based entities, it shines as if it were supremely polished. It can now shoot a cannon like laser.You also upgrade the ring, allowing to link it to to Blaise's! You can now channel your domain through it as well. You're both able to tap into the Sea Mom's domain to use light and water based powers. The rings become the Bonds of the Glimmering Sea.Tomorrow, you'll awake with your maid, Blaise, in the realm of the Hungerer!Next time! On Oversized Weapon Quest!You will believe an X-Man can die!Thanks for playing tonight, and I look forward to running tomorrow! One last confrontation! You guys are great! Thanks for giving me the motivation to finish this thing off!
>>34845942Pretty sure we actually did get the sword made indestructible with a blessing from the earth elemental waaaay back in one of our very first sidequests.
>>34846248>SOMEONE WILL DIEFuck.
>>34846248Thanks for running Chief!
>>34846252Hungerer is so going to break our sword and Shax's victory despite that will be glorious. Fortunately, our ring is a much smaller and less obvious target!
>>34846279Hint: It's the Hungerer, who is actually Shax's dad.
>>34846248Sweet! So much hype. Thanks for running chief. See you tomorrow.
>>34846248>You will believe an X-Man can die!
So what will Shax and Blaise be known as once they ascend?
>>34846248My favorite quests are ending this weekend. Thank you for running. Its been fucking awesome.
>>34846248Are we officialy married to Blaise yet?
>>34846248>That one fucking line
>>34846375"Shax, savior of all ground dwellers and Big Sis of all Turtle Kind, and her Frozen Shadow Maid."
>>34846306Hungerer is gonna break em both and kill us.
>>34846462I just have this picture in my head of a maid outfit made of shadows with snow frills.
I hope someone imprisons Shax in an orb to power their civilization.
>>34846496Has this quest ever bad ended? I don't remember a single time. Not even in the scary castle of critfails.
>>34846375Big Boss Shax, Solid Turtle, Shax.The Maid, Liquid Bear, Blaise.Also Naked Tree, Allonces.
>>34846527>has this quest ever bad endedthat's like me asking if you've ever died
>>34846506>Thinking a Goblin is going to give out any Energy.>A Goblin who rules over the Plane of Avarice.Yeah no, they trap us into an artifact, we turn into a god damn Sphere of Annihilation / Black Hole on them.
>>34846570>implying we could do that after being sealed in an arcane prison>implying they would ask us to give them energy rather than tearing it from us
>>34846628>Thinking they could take something that belongs to Shax from herNot even the Spooky Castle of Crit-Fails could do that.
>>34846213Then again, the quest isn't called "Shax Quest" or even "Goblin Quest". It's Oversized Weapon Quest, so I suppose it's appropriate.
>>34846692that was us attacking themno one's ever really come at us with preparations before. it's always us coming at them.
Hey guys, I was thinking about how Blaise has a couple elemental thrones of Ice and all. Do you think the polar regions of SeaWorld are still going to be glacial tundra populated by hardy survivor types (read polar bearfolk)?
>>34848393>Polar Ice Caps>Short days, long nights>Polar bearsyou're a genius
>>34838120>dat picit is so good that I can almost call it perfect even without Shax's tummy. But not quite...I love their faces.
>>34838120Thanks for the wild ride Chief
>>34851898>>34852048You're late!You were in that pokemon thread, weren't you?
>Linked themselves spiritually through matching rings in order to ascend and kill a god togetherMost badass wedding ceremony ever.
>>34852078yes. no. which one?
>>34852371A mod deleted a pokesmut quest and banned everyone that posted in it even onceI was at least watching the thread
>>34852395ah, then no wasn't in that one. just kinda slept through the thread
>>34852395And then that guy made a thread complaining about how the "nazimods" deleted his dumb pokesmut questIt was pretty embarrassing for everyone involved
>>34852637Who was "that guy"
>>34852673The OP of the quest
>>34852705Umm, no?OP just finished typing the last update, posted it in a pastebin on his twitter, and said he'd continue the quest on Akun.He's consistently been the only reasonable person in this whole stupid thing. He even put his updates in pastebins in the thread that got deleted.Leave L&M in QTG