>>34838120
AW SHIT IS THAT A FINISHED COMMISSION I SEE?

Also, >Have Blaise take you into the city formally.
The sooner we befriend them, the sooner we can get everyone caught up in our pace and somehow agree to live on giant turtles.

>>34838120
!
>Have Blaise take you into the city formally.

>>34838120
Hang on, we got a boss point last thread I thought?

http://archive.moe/tg/thread/34676456/#34681568

>>34838120
>Have Blaise take you into the city formally.

>>34838120
>Have Blaise take you into the city formally.
Yep

Alright! Formal march then!

Also, sure you have a boss point.

Give me a d20 check for reasons.

Rolled 9 (1d20)

>>34838387
Time for critafails!

Rolled 10 (1d20)

>>34838387
I will give you a d20 because you told me to, and because the results may be funny. Are those good enough reasons?

Rolled 16 (1d20)

>>34838387

>>34838434

Dang, I guess you succeed. Okay.

Writing.

Rolled 13 (1d20)

>>34838458
I'm sorry. Were we supposed to fuck up hilariously?

Your goblin senses tingle, and from the side you see a half-orc come barrelling out of the underbrush. He brandishes two swords, and you manage to get your sword up in time to block it.

"Sinclaire!" Blaise calls out in shock, running over to the manservant, and tackling him in a hug, "You're back!"

He pats the girl on the head, "Yes, mistress, I'm back. Shax's reactions seem to have improved. Has she been taking good care of you?"

"More like I've been taking good care of her," the maid scoffs, "Thank you for the ribbon, Sinclaire. Now, we've got business we need to take care of! I was going to escort Shax to Manderlay, so she can conclude some business." The maid puts her hands on her hips proudly.

Sinclaire 'tsk, tsk's her. "A good servant doesn't reveal their master's plans. You have much to learn, mistress." The half orc then sniffs the air. "Undead about, yeah?"

You wave, "Nah, that's just Squidface's stink."

"That abomination is still around?" Why does no one like Squidface?! He's the nicest guy! Sinclaire seems horrified. "Mistress, are you sure it's a good idea to...?"

The maid doesn't even bother responding, instead opting to give him a withering glare. "Hey, Sinclaire!" You call out to him, "Have you ever ridden a big lizard before?"

>You've earned Sinclaire's approval! This half-orc approves of your ownership of Blaise. Getting on his good side is bound to be useful!

>You've earned the Powerful Guest Character achievement! Sometimes an NPC joins up and you can't control him and he runs around killing everything in one hit and you're like 'daaaang' but he is also stealing all your exp. This is one of those times.

The three of you are on the dinosaur moments later, thundering towards Manderlay. Blaise tries to tell you about the city, but you also have a hard time listening/caring.

>Go through the main gate.
>Go to one of the noble's estates outside.
>Go through the adventurer's gate to the side.

>>34838808
>>Go through the adventurer's gate to the side.

... What is this, the Servant's entrance only for absurdly powerful people? Can't have adventurers mixing with the common folk.

>>34838808
>Go through the adventurer's gate

>>34838808
>Go to one of the noble's estates outside.

>>34838808
>>Go through the adventurer's gate to the side.

>>34838808
>>Go through the adventurer's gate to the side.
There better be a red carpet, though, since we saved the city and all.

Alright! A triumphant entrance! Give me a d20 roll.

>>34839040
This is the gate I least expect red carpet on. Adventurers track all sorts of shit in with their muddy, disgusting boots.

Rolled 20 (1d20)

>>34839101

>>34839107
WOAHHHHHHHHH

Rolled 10 (1d20)

>>34839101
Time for glory, Shax style!

Rolled 14 (1d20)

>>34839101
Please be something cool!!!

>>34839107
Wish granted.

>>34839107
Of course we'd crit on something as minor as this.

>>34839156
>minor
>entering a city using the entrance all the badasses use
This is the most important time to crit! A first impression!

>>34839107

Neat! Writign.

>>34839186
>>34839107
I hope we do the spinturtle entrance, only competently this time.

>>34838120

That fucking picture man. It is just too good. Mind telling us who did it? I might have to throw fistfuls of money at them for character portraits.

>>34839212
Maybe on a Turtlesaurus Rex...

So on a scale of 1-10 how likely do you think it is that Sinclair is a Sword Saint? I am going to go with a soild 8.

The gate comes up, and you feel your heart race. This was 'enemy territory' for the lognest period of time. The big base. The impenetrable, invincible fortress. And you're just riding up to it! On a dinosaur! When you get near the gate, armed guards are clearly agitated, until Sinclaire hops down. The man is apparently quite familiar to the guards, and they quickly open the gate.

Adventurers gawk at you, a strange goblin with a sword as big as most people, riding into town on the back of a dinosaur, with a known noble girl dressed as a maid. It's a sight most people probably would never have expected to see in their entire lives. Once inside, you gawk at the massive, sprawling city. A true city. The massive stone structures are a bit dirty, but there are so MANY of them. It is hard to not be impressed.

"Welcome to Manderlay, Shax. You may be a notorious villain, but you also saved this place, you know? It is okay to take pride in that." And you do. You do take some pride in it. It's only standing because you stopped a demonic invasion, and that feels good somehow.

Still, it was time to go hunting for cultists. You hope down off your Dinosaur, handing the lizard over to the flummoxed stablemaster. Giving a rough description of the cultists you're looking for to Sinclaire, he heads out into the city to hunt for them.

Now, how are you going to find a cultist organization as the most suspicious person in the city without tipping who they are and where their location is?

You trip over a sewer grate, the metal falling away and crashing onto someone. "The Sea Mother preserve us!" A voice says from down below. Oh, that was easy.

>Jump down. Hi I'm Shax.
>REPORT TO THE AUTHORITIES
>Just drop the rod in there and tell Blaise you wanna see the city.
>Ignore the voice, hit the streets, try to hunt them down! [You will lose exp for choosing this option, you idiots. Actually, you can't even choose it at all!]

>>34839954
>>Jump down. Hi I'm Shax.

Ugh. I so want to just drop the rod and hang out with the maid, but I can't trust that these guys aren't REALLY bad at their jobs...

Also, sorry for the slowness. Was resolving lunch.

>>34839954
>>Just drop the rod in there and tell Blaise you wanna see the city.

IS THIS A DEITO???

>>34839954
>Jump down. Hi I'm Shax.

>>34839954
>Just drop the rod in there and tell Blaise you wanna see the city.

>>34839954
>Jump down. Hi I'm Shax.
Sup.

>>34839954
>Jump down. Hi I'm Shax.

Let's get this taken care of properly before we do anything else.

>>34839954
As much as I'd love to go on a date with Shax, we have to make sure these cultists do things properly.
>Jump down. Hi I'm Shax.

>>34840237

>on a date
>with Shax

Suddenly I realize Shax would be Shax's best partner.

Anyway, writing.

>>34840266
Could the world handle such a thing as more than one Shax, though?

>>34840398
It had better be capable of that. God Shax has got omnipresence.

Wow. These guys aren't good at sneaking. Not like you! You look around a bit as Blaise watches you dumb founded. "Shax, what are you doing? Shax, don't. Shax, stop crawling into the sewers." She pinches her nose as you wiggling into the hole and drop down, landing on some poor guy. With your dark vision you can easily see the schlubs you're dealing with. It is about five guys in hooded robes, standing around in the sewer. There is a ladder near the entrance, suggesting they use this to climb up and down often.

"Hi! I'm Shax," You wave at them, "Mortal blade of the Sea Mom. I got a delivery for you." The cultists are speechless for a moment, and then they all start talking at once.

'is this entrapment' 'holy shit a goblin' 'that sword is so much larger than our sacrificial daggers I cannot even believe it'

Then Blaise lands in the sewers as well, wrinkling her nose and holding her axe to the side. "Jeez, Shax, what are you doing down here anyway? Oh." She rolls her eyes, "The cultists were right here? Are you serious? How did you find them anyway?"

You give Blaise a thumbs up, "Luck." Turning back to the cultists, you grab the rod and hold it out, "Okay you guys, the Sea Mom told me you'd know what to do with this. I was gonna hand it right over, but I gotta ask. What the heck are you going to do with this?!" You weren't doubting them. You weren't. But this was the least professional cult you have ever seen.

There is a gasp, and the one you landed on gets up to his feet, "Th-that's the fabled Rod of Mercurius Malignity!" You highly doubt that is the real name. They explain the details of the ritual to you, much to your boredom, but there is one point at the end that stuck with you. "Of course, we'd need a magnus capable of focusing the aetherial energies in such a way. Or an appropriately powerful locus."

You don't know what any of that crap is, but you know what it means.

>So you don't have it. I can help find it?
>YOU'RE ON YOUR OWN, BOYS.

>>34840847
>>YOU'RE ON YOUR OWN, BOYS.
I'm sure you guys can handle it. Let's see if Blaise knows any neat places to visit. With food and entertainment and lemonade.

>>34840847
>So you don't have it. I can help find it?

This is the cult equivalent of a goth clique, isn't it?

Ah jeez, this is just delaying the ascension more. Damn sidequests.

>>34840847
>a magnus capable of focusing the aetherial energies in such a way
Pretty sure we picked up one of those. Hes even got squid bits! That's sure to be a plus right?

>>34840847
>>So you don't have it. I can help find it?

>>34840916
It is, however, enabling TURTLE WORLD by helping the flood, so I guess it's ok?

>>34840847
>So you don't have it. I can help find it?

We've got God Magic and Pearls, maybe we can do something with those to make this work. A door to our realm sounds pretty locusy.

Or ask Squidface, he's good at this stuff and might be magnusy enough.

>>34840916

Don't worry about time. I've got the whole weekend off.

>>34840847
>So you don't have it. I can help find it?
C'mon, where are you gonna find powerful locusts when you're in the sewers where there's nothing for them to eat? These guys are clueless.

>>34840915
Nothing stopping us from making the search for totally important part-time cultists and cultist accessories into a whole lot of window shopping first. No better way to find something you're looking for than looking in a whole lot of places.

>>34840847
>'is this entrapment' 'holy shit a goblin' 'that sword is so much larger than our sacrificial daggers I cannot even believe it'
lol

>>34840847

Obviously, this sidequest should involve retrieving a locus from the cult's leader, who is trapped inside a gym locker.

>>So you don't have it. I can help find it?

>>34841022
This is an excellent suggestion.

So you wanna hunt for the stuff? Okay. Do you wanna do the window shopping while hunting thing, or do you wanna scour the city for clues rather than window shop? Quick five minute vote.

>>34841229
Window shopping

>>34841229
>window shopping

There are cool things to gawk at.

>>34841229
window shop

>>34841229
Nothing weird about a couple adventurers out and about, asking every shop in town where to find a powerful magical locus while eating ice cream and holding hands. Shit's absolutely par for the course for adventurers. Nothing suspicious at all about it.

>>34841229
Window shop while hunting, Shax is the best at multitasking.

>>34841229
Window shopping for sure.

>>34841229
Window shop!

>>34841229
Window shop, 'course.

Alright. That looks pretty unanimous. Okay! So. Give me a d100, and also what would you be interested in buying when you roll. I'll take the first five rolls. General item statements is fine, but a specific item could be vetoed if it is a bit too silly.

Rolled 34 (1d100)

>>34841383
We have to get a really awesome hat.

Rolled 8 (1d100)

>>34841383
Pretty things!

Rolled 49 (1d100)

>>34841383
HERE WE GO

Also, I would like food. Fantasy food, accompanied by pictures of food from Vanillaware games.

>>34841420
We're going to find alllll the ugly things!

Rolled 62 (1d100)

>>34841383

>>34841427
Eating delicious food is always a good plan.

Rolled 41 (1d100)

>>34841383
Some jewelry, whatever we need for Blaise and Shax to do each other's hair, pretty dresses, and swords.

Rolled 72 (1d100)

>>34841383
Engagement rings of course.
Maybe some cool trinkets I guess?

Rolled 15 (1d100)

>>34841383
Let's find a cat for Blaise!

>>34841498

>this is the guy who won

Sometimes I wonder, 4chan.

Food as well, then.

Writing!

>>34841383
Oh, I just realized, if there are bags of holding or equivalent available that seems like the sort of thing Shax would be interested in.

Gigantic capacity for loot has gotta be appealing, even now that Shax is a total big-shot.

>>34841530
Oh? You're taking the sixth roll instead of having Shax sample the local cuisine?

>>34841659

Nah, I am taking local cuisine. And the jewelry shopping.

>>34841530
What's there to wonder? We've been all about getting Shax hooked up with Blaise for a good while now.

>>34841686
Shiny things still distract Shax of course.

"Alright, whatever, I'll go find you that junk." You really didn't trust them to get the job done, and you had promised Sea Mom you'd get this thing going. If you fall through on the deal you might not own all the turtles anymore. And that was just unacceptable. You grab Blaise's sleeve, and tug on it while pointing up. "Okay. Show me where the locusses are. And the magnets."

Blaise pokes her cheek with a finger, while tilting her head, as if lost in thought. "Most magni would have nothign to do with a cult like this, and as for locii, your best bet is probably in the foreign districts' glassworking shops. I'll show you the way, come on." You both climb out of the sewers, and head towards the foreign district, Blaise excitedly telling you about the landmarks around the city. She seemed fairly well known around her, lots of people stopping to greet her and plenty of waves to be had.

"Jeez, Blaise, you're callin' an awful lot of attention onto me." It kinda made you uncomfortable. You're not used to being around this many surface dwellers, to be honest. "Where the heck is this foreigner's district or whatever? Let's hurry?"

As you're asking the question Sinclaire arrives from the shadows. "Greetings, Shax. I've located the cult, and in less than two hours, I might add." He gives a small chuckle.

Blaise looks a bit nervous, "Th-that's great, Sinclaire. You're such a hard worker." You just sort of look at him and say nothing.

"Don't you want to know where they are?" He looks at you, "Oh man you've found them already haven't you what the hell"

After that, you arrive in the foreign district, and Blaise takes you to all her favorite food stands. Chicken Marsalla with angel hair noodles for lunch, a sweet souffle for dessert. It was a nice, heavy meal. You've never felt so full!

After that, you arrive at a glassworker.

wat buy

>A matching pair of rings, silver with a green stone embedded.
>Matching pair of earrings. Golden crescent moons.

>>34841920
>A matching pair of rings, silver with a green stone embedded.

>>34841920
>A matching pair of rings, silver with a green stone embedded.
Rings are nice

>>34841920
>A matching pair of rings, silver with a green stone embedded.

>>34841920
>Matching pair of earrings. Golden crescent moons.

>>34841920
>>A matching pair of rings, silver with a green stone embedded.
I like green and silver more than gold. They're simply prettier colors. That's all there is to it.

>>34841920
>A matching pair of earrings sunburst turtles and bears lounging (reclining) on crescent moons.

>>34841920
>>A matching pair of rings, silver with a green stone embedded.
Green is a color that some turtles are and also a color that some goblins are. Moons are alright, but we lived underground for most of our lives and why the heck should we care about moons?

>>34841920
>>A matching pair of rings, silver with a green stone embedded.

>>34841920
>A matching pair of rings, silver with a green stone embedded.

>>34841999
They also match nicely.

>>34841999
Of course anon, only for prettiness. We understand perfectly.

>>34841920
>A matching pair of rings, silver with a green stone embedded.

The most important decision in the entire quest is made.

You've sealed your fates. Nothing will ever be the same.

Writing.

>>34842200
I don't believe you chief.

>>34842200
I thought that was the ribbon vs choker decision?

>>34842200
OWQ really just a very in dept maid simulator.

>>34838120
>same eye color
>same bow

Suspicious.

>>34842285
Meido points are a hell of a drug.

>>34842213
Didn't we fail that one?

>>34842335
What if Shax and Blaise are cousins?

>>34842356
So lewd

>>34842337
Anons chose the tactical choice for some reason, and not the proof of ownership.

>>34842200

>We just got Married to our Maid

This is the greatest thing ever.

>>34842449
Ehh, I kinda wanted to go the Sitri route, honestly. Oh well, I guess I can accept this too.

>>34842478
But Stiri likes guys though.

>>34842437
Tactical? No, ribbons are just a billion times cuter.

>>34842478
While Sitri is cool, I don't think she fits Shax very well. Also at this point there was zero chance of that route anyway.

>>34842478

MAID IS TRUE LOVE.

MAID IS LIFE.

ELF IS SIN.

SITRI IS BROSBANDO.

File: 1398309590450.png (99 KB, 500x912)

99 KB PNG

>>34842523
ELF A brat

>>34842478
I almost thought I was alone in thinking this. I'm glad to have a bro.

>>34842501
I don't think Sitri cares what your gender is, she doesn't seem like the type to care.

>>34842559
>I don't think Sitri cares what your gender is, she doesn't seem like the type to care.
But she does though she has a running joke were she complains that she only gets interest from women.

>>34842559
I've been wanting to go the goat route since I read her introduction, but alas I was too late, by the time I caught up with the quest the colective already decided on Blaise and so I didn't even try to vote for Satyress end.

Sinclaire is watching all this with an amused expression.

You end up purchasing the rings, giving the other one to Blaise as a reward for 'being a good maid who showed you where good food is'. Inspecting the item between two fingers, Blaise makes a 'hmmm' sound. "Shax? I mean, mistress? This would function as an excellent locii. We've already purchased it, so why not use it?" You shrug, you bought them cause they were shiny and pretty, but if it accomplishes the quest, that's great, too!

You rush back to the cultists, not stopping for more shopping or eating, and get into the sewers once more. The cultists are all a little intimidated by the newly arrived half-orc, but they don't say anything. You and Blaise bring out your rings, and show them to the cultists.

"Oh man, that is easily a level ten receptacle! It could handle a ritual as powerful as the one the Sea Mother's holy implement would require. How did you find such a powerful receptacle in such a short amount of time?"

You give the cultist a thumbs up a second time, and excitedly mutter one word again, "Luck."

The cultist leader sort of looks at you with an impassive look, like you're just pulling his leg. The sort of 'are you fucking serious' expression that only someone completely weary with the world could make, a truly 'I'm done, I'm so fucking done' kind of look that would cause disbelief to manifest itself and fully take form as an avatar of utter disdain with the fortunes of others that could only arise from someone who has been exposed to this kind of shit their entire life. The expression of a NPC. "Right."

One of the other, even more lame, cultists looks at the ring. "Oh, wow! These are good enough that we only need one of them. You can still use it after the ritual, of course, but it will have some lingering effects. Mostly ones involving your aetheric affinity with water." You don't know what that means. "It'll jam up your ring with magic." Oh.

>Use yours.
>Use Blaise's.

>>34842692
I have no idea what this means.

[x] Use both

>>34842692
>[X] Pick at random

>>34842692
>[X] Paper Scissors Rock with Blaise.

>>34842692
>>34842719
I support this.

>>34842692
Use both, obviously. Would the effect be weaker? If yes, since I am a powergaming git, use ours.

>>34842692
>Use Blaise's.
A magicified ring can be our wedding gift to her.

>>34842692
Blaise should get it because she has ice powers.

Water + Ice = more ice

>Use Blaise's.

>>34842692
>Use yours.

Blaise is ice, we are water.

File: 1352251582920.jpg (42 KB, 375x375)

42 KB JPG

>>34842692
>The sort of 'are you fucking serious' expression that only someone completely weary with the world could make, a truly 'I'm done, I'm so fucking done' kind of look that would cause disbelief to manifest itself and fully take form as an avatar of utter disdain with the fortunes of others that could only arise from someone who has been exposed to this kind of shit their entire life. The expression of a NPC

I am crying right now.

My ribs hurt so bad from laughter.

Oh god it hurts.

>>34842692
>Use yours.

>>34842692
>Use Blaise's.
I don't really get it but if they involve OUR affinity with water then why not?

>>34842692

>Use yours.

MAGIC RINGS!

Looks like Blaise slightly won? Okay. Give me a d20 roll.

>>34842692
So it becomes a +X to water stuff?
>Use yours.
We are the seamom's mortal blade ro whatever, we have to be good at water shit.

Rolled 12 (1d20)

>>34842973
MAID DICE

Rolled 20 (1d20)

>>34842973
*drumroll*

Rolled 7 (1d20)

>>34842973
ugh, fiiiine
>if nat20 use ours

Rolled 17 (1d20)

>>34842973

>>34842994
Nice.

Rolled 14 (1d20)

>>34842994
wow, okay, we can't let blaise keep that ring, that belongs to the lLrd of Turtles, clearly

File: FAdd.png (535 KB, 759x680)

535 KB PNG

>>34842994

These don't matter crits are fucking cracking me up, you guys.

>>34843016
Silly anon, our wife needs a connection to our own plane of course.

>>34843016
Fuck you, that is HER ring and she is keeping it!!!!!!

>>34843016
Too late. Meido is Turtle Lord now.

>>34843016
Maybe the ritual goes so awesomely that the magic spreads to both rings...

>>34842994
>Blaise is now Sea Mom

>>34843030
1. She already has a connection to our plane
2. We don't actually have any power over water yet. Just Turtles and Light.

>>34843058
Please anon. She's sea-daughter-in-law.

>>34843075
Sea Sister?

>>34843084
Sea Wife

Gonna be a sec, finishing dinner prep.

>>34842996
>if nat20 use ours
Haha.

>>34843187
Can't blame me for trying

>>34843215
I bet Blaise will engage maximum over blush from our girt now.

>>34843442
She hasn't really been blushing because of us as far as I can tell, honestly, I'm kinda surprised.

>>34843442
Girt?

>>34843679
I think he means girth, anon.

>>34843672
That's because all the Shax x Blaise is in the minds of us, the viewers.

File: 1390729074450.jpg (150 KB, 620x916)

150 KB JPG

>>34843679
Gift. Damnit.

>>34843702
This also works.

>>34843746
Shush, you.

"Alright, stand back! We're going to begin the ritual." You do as he bids, and get back quite a bit so that you don't distract the cultists from whatever they're doing. They take the rod, place it on a small pedestal and spend literally forever marking out a rune based sigil around it. It is the kind of event where you're just standing around talking to Blaise and Sinclaire about random things because there is no time skip function.

Turns out Sinclaire is ex-military surprising no one. He became a butler when Blaise's family saved his life, and went on elusive butler training, a special hidden camp that only a few know about.

Blaise talked about her favorite pets. She apparently has owned three dogs in her time, all giant schnauzers. There was Barklington, Rufflington, and Wooflington. Wooflington still lives, though the other two passed away when she was twelve. It was apparently very depressing.

After they started the ritual looked like it was going to take a stupidly long time. If there were guards alerted to the presence of this cult, you might have to defend against waves of them here, protecting the weak, easily dispatched cultists from their disciplinary actions. "Don't worry, Shax!" The leader calls out, "This should only take about five minutes!" Precisely five minutes pass, and the ritual completes. "This is astounding. The ritual has succeeded beyond our wildest imaginations!"

"Okay," you respond, "Give me Blaise's ring back." They hand it over immediately. It feels... weird. Before you give it to Blaise, Sinclaire stops you and inspects it.

"Fascinating," The half-orc mutters, "Not only has it been infused with aetheric properties aligning with water, it seems to have been connected to the Sea Mother's domain itself."

Whatever the means. Blaise snatches the ring out of Sinclaire's hand and puts it on.

So, what now?

>Alright! Let's get ascended!
>Let's bother these nerds and see what else they know.

>>34844118
>Alright! Let's get ascended!
It's time! Everyone get hype!

>>34844118
>>Let's bother these nerds and see what else they know.

SIDEQUESTS DON'T STOP FOR ANYTHING.

>>34844118
>Alright! Let's get ascended!

Time to fuck us up a Hungerer.

>>34844118
>Let's bother these nerds and see what else they know.

>>34844118
>Let's bother these nerds and see what else they know.
Hrm hrm

>>34844118
>Alright! Let's get ascended!
Time to give our race a proper afterlife.

>>34844118
>Alright! Let's get ascended!
Time to slay gods and achieve maid end.

>>34844118
>Alright! Let's get ascended!

>>34844118
>He became a butler when Blaise's family saved his life, and went on elusive butler training, a special hidden camp that only a few know about.
Yo, wait, does he know our butler? Are they hardened buttling veterans, brothers forged in blood through their trials deep in the trenches of Dumbwaiteristan?

Alright. Writing.

>>34844118
Wait, did we just make an artifact that lets SeaMom possess/avatarize the wearer?

This could be fun.

>>34844430

>Sea Mom ASSUMES DIRECT CONTROL of Blaise to talk with us
>It is right after they consummated their wedding.

Oh wow, talk about awkward.

also Lewd.

>>34844430
How else is Blaise going to help us fight the Hungerer?

>>34844463
By ascending with us? She agreed to do that during the beach episode.

>Blaise helps Shax kill Hungerer
>Shax helps Blaise kill Sea Mom

We're doing this, right?

>>34844694
>kill Sea Mom
That kind of shit isn't welcome around here.
You should leave and never come back.

>>34844694
>Kill SeaMom
No.

>>34844694
>Turning on Sea Mom.
I'm sorry, you appear to be in the wrong quest anon. I don't know which quest in which you backstab your greatest benefactors you come from, but kindly return there.

>>34844694

>Killing her Mother-in-Law

Why would Blaise do that?

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>>34844694
>Wanting to kill best mom.

>>34844818
Why does the knot have to be so complicated? I don't get it. Pls explain hanging physics.

>>34845018
You need the coils so there's enough friction to hold the knot together.

You bid them a quick goodbye, patting them on the shoulder after assuring them that their plot significance was horribly over. They didn't even get names. That's just depressing. After climbing the ladder, you get on your dinosaur and ride back out. Blaise and Sinclaire jabber about the ring when you head back to the forest, and get to witch boy's house.

You crash the orb to the ground.

"Thank you for freeing me from my prison, mortal!" Twin gods pop out, a girl and a boy. You wave your hand at them dismissively, and get the other deities to show up. Then they talk a about their past: 'oh hey how's it been? what's it been? several centuries?' 'oh you know trapped in an arcane prison. how bout you?' 'same here! what a coincidence' You finally get to the point that matters.

The twins look a bit surprised, "What? She wants to ascend? Does she meet all the prerequisite requirements to ascend?"

A god you freed nods excitedly, "Yep! There some things she doesn't have, but they are more than made up for with the sheer amount of aetheric power she's got at her disposal."

"Oh. So, what, we're going to help her ascend, then?"

You put your hands on your hips and point at Blaise. "Yep. Her, too."

The gods all sort of collectively turn at you and make a simultaneous 'are you crazy' expression, followed by a shrug. "Alright, whatever you say. There are a couple of ways we can go about this."

>Direct power font ascension. Burn all your pearls to ascend directly to the plane of avarice. The most direct confrontation possible.
>Worship based ascension. Requires no pearls. You'll arrive at the entrance, and can only exist there through the power of FRIENDSHIP. The damage you take from the Hungerer will negatively effect them. But you'll have pearls.
>Artifact based ascension. Burns all your pearls. Transforms some weapons into holy implements. These items become significantly stronger, but you are tied to their existence. If they break, you're done.

>>34845065
You usually want to do 7-9 coils though

>>34845213
>Artifact based ascension. Burns all your pearls. Transforms some weapons into holy implements. These items become significantly stronger, but you are tied to their existence. If they break, you're done.

The Godslayer Sword! That is all we need.

>>34845213
Can we get a bit more explanation on these options?

>>34845213
>>Artifact based ascension. Burns all your pearls. Transforms some weapons into holy implements. These items become significantly stronger, but you are tied to their existence. If they break, you're done.
Duh

>>34845213
>Worship based ascension. Requires no pearls. You'll arrive at the entrance, and can only exist there through the power of FRIENDSHIP. The damage you take from the Hungerer will negatively effect them. But you'll have pearls.

It's the most dramatic one. And we can use our pearls to fuck up the Hungerer.

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>>34845213
>>34845213
Somehow I feel like no matter what things will go horrible wrong with a single nat 1

>>34845213
>Artifact based ascension. Burns all your pearls. Transforms some weapons into holy implements. These items become significantly stronger, but you are tied to their existence. If they break, you're done.
The biggest and best sword.

>>34845213
>Worship based ascension. Requires no pearls. You'll arrive at the entrance, and can only exist there through the power of FRIENDSHIP. The damage you take from the Hungerer will negatively effect them. But you'll have pearls.
Yeeee

>>34845213
>>Artifact based ascension. Burns all your pearls. Transforms some weapons into holy implements. These items become significantly stronger, but you are tied to their existence. If they break, you're done.
>not wanting the holy sword of Shax
>Or the chalice of ultimate shax perception

>>34845213
>Artifact based ascension. Burns all your pearls. Transforms some weapons into holy implements. These items become significantly stronger, but you are tied to their existence. If they break, you're done.
Pearls are a crutch. At her very heart, Shax is a swordgoblin. And if we give her a literally divine giant sword, there truly will be nothing her cutter cannot cuttle.

>>34845213
>>Artifact based ascension. Burns all your pearls. Transforms some weapons into holy implements. These items become significantly stronger, but you are tied to their existence. If they break, you're done.

Seems the most appropriate. Divine Titan Sword is a go!

>>34845213
>Artifact based on the sord

>>34845213
>Artifact based ascension. Burns all your pearls. Transforms some weapons into holy implements. These items become significantly stronger, but you are tied to their existence. If they break, you're done.
Will we be able to make for Artifacts as time goes on?

>>34845213
Man, SORD and FREND are both pretty Shax-y ways of going about doing this.

>>34845213
Does artifact based work kind of like goblin souls for the hungerer? So say people give us cool objects for us to get power in the same way the he eats goblin souls?

>>34845213
>Direct power font ascension. Burn all your pearls to ascend directly to the plane of avarice. The most direct confrontation possible.
Shax don't need nobody nor nothin' to be awesome.

>>34845213
>>Artifact based ascension. Burns all your pearls. Transforms some weapons into holy implements. These items become significantly stronger, but you are tied to their existence. If they break, you're done.

Like our weapon could ever break!

>>34845407
Congratulations, you are now some future Adventurer's "Destroy this artifact!" macguffin!

>>34845213
>Worship based ascension. Requires no pearls. You'll arrive at the entrance, and can only exist there through the power of FRIENDSHIP. The damage you take from the Hungerer will negatively effect them. But you'll have pearls.

>>34845213
>Direct power font ascension.

Hard mode go!

>>34845213

>Direct power font ascension. Burn all your pearls to ascend directly to the plane of avarice. The most direct confrontation possible.

No dependencies, no feedback, just pure force of nature Shax power.

Why on God's green and soon to be very blue earth would we tie our existence to anything when that's the entire reason we're ascending?

>>34845213
>Artifact based ascension. Burns all your pearls. Transforms some weapons into holy implements. These items become significantly stronger, but you are tied to their existence. If they break, you're done.
BUT FIRST, UPGRADES AND SHOPPING

Shax will have 3 primary symbols: The Giant Sword, the Cape, and the Boots

cont. because I'm still thinking and I want my vote in.

Looks like artifact is the choice then.

Your sword is the obvious choice, right? So select one more item to get super charged. You have:

>Ring of silver and emerald
>Bracelet of Blinding Strike!
>Mask of being huge!
>A Belt of Ogre Strength!
>Power Bracelet!
>Holy Sword!
>Chalice of True Seeing!
>Fire Resistant Cape!
>A complimentary grappling hook.

>>34845390

No. These are all temporary methods of retaining power in the Hungerer's plane. If you get control of the plane, you'll decide how you want to retain divine power. Loot based worship is always an option for a greed based god.

>>34845474
>Ring of silver and emerald

>>34845474
>>Fire Resistant Cape!
This was our very first magic item, I believe.

>>34845474
>Mask of being huge!

Because come on guys, if that mask already makes us huge... IT'LL MAKE US GODLY HUGE!!!

>>34845474
WAIT, see if Blacksmith-chan in our castle can upgrade the cape!

Also, Blaise is definitely her axe and ring

>>34845436

>Implying they can destroy our Sord when it's protected by the Sea Mom and Maido
>implying they would even destroy it when we are the only reason there will even be non-Sea-Mom eldritch horror life.

They destroy our artifacts, they DESERVE to be enslaved to eldritch monstrosities or drown when our Island Turtles all either die out or stop entering the world from our Plane.

Destroying our Artifact would quite literally mean the death of all Non-Sea Mom affiliated life.

>>34845474
>Loot based worship
That's the most Shax thing ever. We've been doing side quests for random loot since the beginning of the quest.

>>34845474
>Power Bracelet!

We've had it as long as our sword and it kind of let's us use our sword so...

>Fire Resistant Cape!

See the cape in >>34838120 ? That's our iconic SHAX CAPE. It is awesome.

>>34845474
>A Belt of Ogre Strength!
Shax will be the most swole goblin with the best sword.

>>34845474

>Ring of silver and emerald

Wedding Ring = Bullshit Power when Near Maid.

>>34845517

I honestly think we could probably use the Sord without it now.

>>34845474
>Ring of silver and emerald

Maximum maid teamups.

>>34845482
No, that would be the Power Bracelet. You know, the thing Squidface gave us so we could even wield our Sword.

>>34845474
>>34845493
Speaking of which, I actually have a few ideas:

>Cape of Fire Resistance
Upgrade with Dragon skin/leather

>Mask of being Huge
Upgrade with Dragon Skull

>Holy Sword +Ring
Replace pommel with ring

>Bracelet + Bracelet
Pair them up as a set!

>>34845474
>Ring of silver and emerald

>>34845474
belt of ogre str

>>34845559
Oh, you're right.

The first magic item we properly looted, then.

>>34845503
>Kuo-Toa who want all surface dwellers dead do it.

>>34845561
>Chalice + Glarestone
Also add in part/the entire Spring-creating Crystal from the forest. THE CUP OVERFLOWETH

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>>34845474
I finally finished that comic!

Sorry about the scattershot quality, the first two panels were drawn back when I had a tablet, then I moved and couldn't lost it so I drew with a mouse.

And then I got sick so the last 3 panels are kinda ass but whatever.

>>34845474
We can super-charge things we own, right? Then I vote we super-charge Blaise

>>34845627
whaaaaaaaaaaat

>>34845627
I love you.

>>34845590

Sea Mom would slap their shit for it.

Sea Mom doesn't -care- if all surface Dwellers die, she just wants the world covered in water and whatever horrible abominations she can think up, we love Turtles, which are sea creatures, and we love Sea Mom, and she at least likes us, so no, she would slap the shit out of them for even thinking about it.

Alright. I'll tally up the votes and write. Last post for the night. I'm super distracted, so. Wait on it!

>>34845627
>cleric is a bartender

Nice joke. I'll use that in my next campaign.

>>34845474
>Power Bracelet!

>>34845561
wait, I got it

>Bracelet + Bracelet +Boots
Turn them into these Haste/Strength boots of...stomping

>>34845681
You sure are trusting.

>>34845561
>Chalice + Scrying Crystal + Forest Spring Crystal
HAS to make some sort of All-seeing spring

>>34845748

Shax has an Alhoon for a best friend.

>>34845786
an abnormally eccentric one

>>34845474
>Power Bracelet!
Remember our origins, guys. As it was in the beginning, so it shall be in the end.

So... Why did you guys decide to bind your very existence to a physical object you're going to use to repeatedly hit something very strong?

That doesn't really sound like a good idea.

>>34845895
I AM THE BONE OF MY SWORD

I AM A SWORD

I AM STRONK

>>34845895

Lich King did it.

>>34845895
how is it not a good idea?

>>34845895
If it breaks we're fucked anyway.

Also, I choose to believe after all the shit we've hit with it that the sword is indestructable.

>>34845895
Because Shax IS the Sword and all is right with the world.

Sord best waifu

>>34845895

THIS BODY SURELY IS

MADE OF SWORDS.

>>34845895
All we need is one nat 1 and we're fucked.

>>34845701
Well, everyone else seems to have forgotten Blacksmith-chan

>>34845895

Because vote Sord 2014.

In Sord we trust.

Believe in Sord who believes in You.

Who do you think Sord is?!

>>34845895
Didn't we get our sword enchanted to bear pretty much indestructable, long ago?

>>34846010

Yep, Earth Elemental with a Earth core made it really fucking hard to break.

And then we drowned it in Dragon blood.

>>34846010
Yeah, and my thought process was that supercharging the sword would supercharge that too.

>>34846033

The Sword becomes a manifestation of Shax's will to succeed, or hunger, maybe both.

It basically does become indestructible.

>>34846098

>Quest: Destroy the Sword of Shax Gloombreaker
>You must weaken the Sword, to do so, you must Feed Shax the goblin until she is no longer capable of eating food, also break her will, also satisfy her lust for Loot, and raiding, and Maid points.

>>34845927
Of course.a lich would.do it, its a better phylactery.

I guess it just feels like something someone impersonating or usurping a god does, as opposed to a proper ascension into godhood.

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>>34846162
Impossible.

Okay, your sword is upgraded! It becomes a LEGENDARY ARTIFACT. It is now known as The Gloom Breaker, does enhanced damage to shadow based entities, it shines as if it were supremely polished. It can now shoot a cannon like laser.

You also upgrade the ring, allowing to link it to to Blaise's! You can now channel your domain through it as well. You're both able to tap into the Sea Mom's domain to use light and water based powers. The rings become the Bonds of the Glimmering Sea.

Tomorrow, you'll awake with your maid, Blaise, in the realm of the Hungerer!

Next time! On Oversized Weapon Quest!

You will believe an X-Man can die!

Thanks for playing tonight, and I look forward to running tomorrow! One last confrontation! You guys are great! Thanks for giving me the motivation to finish this thing off!

>>34845942
Pretty sure we actually did get the sword made indestructible with a blessing from the earth elemental waaaay back in one of our very first sidequests.

>>34846248
>SOMEONE WILL DIE

Fuck.

>>34846248
Thanks for running Chief!

>>34846252
Hungerer is so going to break our sword and Shax's victory despite that will be glorious. Fortunately, our ring is a much smaller and less obvious target!

>>34846279

Hint: It's the Hungerer, who is actually Shax's dad.

>>34846248
Sweet! So much hype.

Thanks for running chief. See you tomorrow.

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>>34846248

>You will believe an X-Man can die!

So what will Shax and Blaise be known as once they ascend?

>>34846248
My favorite quests are ending this weekend.
Thank you for running. Its been fucking awesome.

>>34846248
Are we officialy married to Blaise yet?

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>>34846248

>That one fucking line

>>34846375
"Shax, savior of all ground dwellers and Big Sis of all Turtle Kind, and her Frozen Shadow Maid."

>>34846306
Hungerer is gonna break em both and kill us.

>>34846462
I just have this picture in my head of a maid outfit made of shadows with snow frills.

I hope someone imprisons Shax in an orb to power their civilization.

>>34846496
Has this quest ever bad ended? I don't remember a single time. Not even in the scary castle of critfails.

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>>34846375

Big Boss Shax, Solid Turtle, Shax.

The Maid, Liquid Bear, Blaise.

Also Naked Tree, Allonces.

>>34846527
>has this quest ever bad ended
that's like me asking if you've ever died

>>34846506

>Thinking a Goblin is going to give out any Energy.
>A Goblin who rules over the Plane of Avarice.

Yeah no, they trap us into an artifact, we turn into a god damn Sphere of Annihilation / Black Hole on them.

>>34846570
>implying we could do that after being sealed in an arcane prison
>implying they would ask us to give them energy rather than tearing it from us

>>34846628
>Thinking they could take something that belongs to Shax from her
Not even the Spooky Castle of Crit-Fails could do that.

>>34846213
Then again, the quest isn't called "Shax Quest" or even "Goblin Quest".

It's Oversized Weapon Quest, so I suppose it's appropriate.

>>34846692
that was us attacking them
no one's ever really come at us with preparations before. it's always us coming at them.

>>34845627
That's amazing

Hey guys, I was thinking about how Blaise has a couple elemental thrones of Ice and all. Do you think the polar regions of SeaWorld are still going to be glacial tundra populated by hardy survivor types (read polar bearfolk)?

>>34848393
>Polar Ice Caps
>Short days, long nights
>Polar bears
you're a genius

>>34838120
>dat pic
it is so good that I can almost call it perfect even without Shax's tummy. But not quite...

I love their faces.

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>>34838120
Thanks for the wild ride Chief

>>34851898
>>34852048
You're late!

You were in that pokemon thread, weren't you?

>Linked themselves spiritually through matching rings in order to ascend and kill a god together

Most badass wedding ceremony ever.

>>34852078
yes. no. which one?

>>34852371
A mod deleted a pokesmut quest and banned everyone that posted in it even once

I was at least watching the thread

>>34852395
ah, then no wasn't in that one. just kinda slept through the thread

>>34852395
And then that guy made a thread complaining about how the "nazimods" deleted his dumb pokesmut quest

It was pretty embarrassing for everyone involved

>>34852637
Who was "that guy"

>>34852673
The OP of the quest

>>34852705
Umm, no?

OP just finished typing the last update, posted it in a pastebin on his twitter, and said he'd continue the quest on Akun.

He's consistently been the only reasonable person in this whole stupid thing. He even put his updates in pastebins in the thread that got deleted.

Leave L&M in QTG