Roy.

>>33803063
Link to the last one nigga?

>>33803063
Jeffery

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Twitter
http://twitter.com/Announcer_QM

Episode 1
http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/33756640/

>>33803063
Jessica.

Who said we can't be a girl?!

>>33803063
So the corsair we voted for last thread is kaputski? What?

>>33803142
>>33803123
>>33803201

i'm pretty sure we just POV swapped to whoever got the Samurai

Also we're a girl

>>33803199
Because no one enjoys your magical realm.

>>33803201
Rotating protagonists maybe?

I swear to god if we have to choose a name every thread for like the first six threads...

>>33803063
Big Mclargehuge

>>33803220
To be fair, a naginata is considered to be a feminine weapon, so this one being a "she" would make sense.

>>33803243
Yeah, not a big fan of rotating perspectives or the utter shit that is name votes.

Crush Crossblast

>>33803220
Historically a naginata was something used by women, so unless we're just a girly man using a girly weapon...

>>33803063
Lu Lingqi.
If boy:
Lu Bu

>>33803296
>Lu Bu in Dog Days.

I back this.

>>33803268
>naginata
>feminine weapon
Not while its lodged in your eye socket

>>33803063
Yuuki Kuchinashi.
Should work for either gender.

>I just realized that I cut off a sentence in my attempts to trim to fit the OP post that explicitly mentioned her being a girl

>Heh, whoops

>>33803309
This.

>>33803296
This.

>>33803305
The amount of murder that would be committed would be glorious.

>>33803296
Fuck historical accuracy, I like the Lu Bu reference.

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"-OR I FLAYS YE ALIVES I WILL"

You are Jack Albator, young adventurer, handsome swashbuckler, and dashing rogue.

You are currently arguing with a jerk about going to a place that she won't explain and ride a thing that looks like it would feed all your ship's crew for a day. She's eyeing you intently as you ramble at her about answering none of your questions and being completely unhelpful.

"NOW, As I was saying. I am not getting on that _thing_ nor am I going to wherever this _place_ is. I'll walk before I do that. I rather walk before I ride anything!"

Your chest swells with pride, you don't get to tell people off that often. Usually you can tell off the occasional lackey, but never really tell someone off who wouldn't immediately try to dislodge your teeth from your jaw.

At least you don't think she can.

Her expression remains cold and unchanging, she mutters some words out of exhasperation
"Are you done yet? If you don't leave now, you won't get there until dark."

"I NEVER SAID I WAS LEAVING ANYWHERE"

She sighs, and then jumps from the ground, all the way up onto the large bird.

"Fine, I'll walk you there. You can ask anything you want on the way."
"I thought ye said that I had the bird!"
"What's the matter? You said you would rather walk, anyway."

Argh, she has me there.

You both begin your stroll through the woods, off in the distance you can see a rather large stone structure, but the scale of the place isn't apparent at the moment.

>Anything you want to ask her as you walk?
>Like maybe where you are
>Or how you got here

>>33803309
Doesn't that basically translate to 衢勇 (Brave) 気山梔子 (Gardenia)?

Just read the last thread, I have no clue what the fuck is happening, what the fuck is happening?

>>33803296
Please, we have enough of those two in the RoTK quest.

>>33803462
WHERE AM I
WHO AM I
WHAT AM I
CAN I FIGHT YOUR PARASITE

>>33803462
Curious why you're calling for a vote on that, since it's obviously what Jack is interested in finding out.

>>33803462
>All of the above

>>33803522
Seconded

>>33803462
>Write-in
Why are we following them at all? They can get fucked. We only chased after the girl because we thought she had a parasite. Let's go back to where we arrived.

>>33803485
Seems pretty obvious to me

-Last thread was Black Jack
-This thread starts with another character
-Now we're back to Jack.

>>33803486
We haven't seen Lu Bu sempai for weeks. ;_;

>>33803540
>obvious
NO ITS BLOODY WELL NOT WHAT IN THE FLYING FUCK IS HAPPENING, WHO ARE WE? ARE THE BITCH FROM THE OP OR ARE WE THE RAVING LUNATIC FROM NOW?

>>33803522
He's already been told that those are tails, not parasites.

>>33803564
>implying he believes her

The parasites are insidious.

>>33803536
OOh, looks like someone wants to split the party

Any other takers?

>>33803563
We're both at different times, duh. At this particular moment we're Mr Crazypirate.

>>33803571
No.

>>33803589
Sure. The parasites might get us too if we hang around too much.

Onwards. We were promised answers to our many and varied questions about what the hell is going on.

>>33803589
NEVER SPLIT THE PARTY

>>33803563
Shirou, pls.

Okay, the parasite thing was funny, once.
Now it's just dumb. Can we drop that already?

>>33803589
No, we must keep a watchful eye on the dirty parasites, they might get us while our back is turned

>>33803589
Yes

>>33803462
How and why do people have tails? People shouldn't have tails, that's ridiculous. Even that one sailor from the ass end of the far east we met that one time didn't have a tail. Explain this sorcery.

>>33803589
Nah.

>>33803641
see
>>33803662
Until we get a proper explanation as to why the fuck she has a tail they are parasites

>>33803462
>do i get payed for this ?

>>33803589
I like it. Another.

>Ask some questions
>Split the party

Consensus?

>>33803706
And if you do split the party, tell me where you want to go next

>The Castle
>Where you came from
>Back to the Shrine
>Just explore and have fun

>>33803706
Ask questions
dont split the party you cum gargler

>>33803681
Right, I knew we were forgetting something.

>>33803706
>Split the party

>>33803589
No, you never split the party,
NEVER.

>>33803706
>Split the party

They've given us no reason to trust or like them. Aside from pomf boxing

>>33803735
Also for >>33803755
>Back to the Shrine

>>33803706
Never turn your back on parasites, thats when they get you

>>33803706
>>Split the party

>>33803706
Ask questions. We're an experienced pirate, not a whiny whore or obnoxious child.

>>33803706
There's been a consesnus for a while now, asking questions. You shouldn't have even entertained the guy who voted to just leave.

>>33803706
>Split the party
>Where you came from

>>33803706
>>33803735
>Split the party
>Where you came from

>>33803800
This

Don't fucking split the party, we'll just delay the inevitable

>>33803706
>>33803735
>Split the party
>Where you came from

>>33803800
>ask is losing
>consensus is to ask

so...you're crazy?

>>33803706
>Ask some questions

Why do you guys want to spilt the party and LEAVE THE FLUFFY TAILS?

>>33803847
In my case because from the perspective of the character, fluffy tails have done absolutely nothing to build trust or goodwill.

>>33803706
Just ask the damn questions, splitting the party is stupid and doesn't accomplish anything.

>>33803839
It was only losing after asked for clarification TWICE.

>>33803839
The consensus the second vote.

>>33803706
Just ask whatever questions and don't split the party. What a waste of time.

the samefag is real

>>33803864
Yes, but they also have answers. We have no idea how to get back to our ship, what with the total lack of familiar landmarks or signs on non-fluffy human habitation.

>>33803706
>>33803735
>Split the party
>Where you came from

>>33803735
>Split the party
>Just explore and have fun

OH OH OH BOOZE BOOZE.

Don't split the fucking party, what's the point?

QUESTIONS, PLEASE.

>>33803864
From the perceptive of the character, he doesn't know where the fuck he is and if there is another sentient being in the immediate vicinity.
Splitting away simply because "I don't like them" is childish and idiotic.

>>33803706
>>33803735
>Split the party
>Where you came from

It's times like this that made me wish we had thread IDs.

>>33803910
I'm all for sticking with them but come on we beat the shit out of a tail

I just can't believe the OP would point out something only one person wanted to do. Then boom, suddenly samefag.

>>33803931
strawpoll it

>>33803944
I'm halfway sure OP is the one samefagging

>>33803931
Really, it's your fault for calling attention to the first party split vote. That just caused people to samefag for it for the lulz.

>>33803931
Your first mistake was in entertaining one guy's idea.

>>33803931
well, call a vote.

>>33803954
He did sound like he really wanted it. We had to vote for it twice.

>>33803931
Just keep 'em together & ask the fookin questions. This is what happens when you indulge stupidity. Final Destination it or just fucking write. I'm beyond caring at this point.
>>33803945
Yeah that's not begging for rigging AT ALL.

>>33803967
No, no more voting, please. That'll just delay even further. Just go with asking questions QM.

>>33803986
Pretty much. QM really wants to do this, so indulge him.

>>33804006
no, fuck off OP

Yeah this isn't getting us anywhere. We're going to keep walking and asking questions it looks like from my count.

>>33804028
8:8 in that last vote. But do whatever you want, this is tiresome.

>>33804028
Thank you, OP

>>33803996
You're right no more voting.
Just split the party.

>>33804028
It's best if you stay neutral during votes and roll 1d2 if there is no consensus.
Seriously, if you want to follow a suggestion you find amusing, just say that you could make it interesting and people won't be this hard on you.

>>33804028
Next time, don't ever call attention to a write-in vote. That just encourages samefags.

>>33804028
Thank god. At least only a third of the thread's spent.

>>33804094
>come on man just jump off, itll be fun

Well, this thing could have been fun, but everybody went.
>M-Mhu Floffy Tails

>>33804148
>mhu
nice job

>>33804148
>wrote in the fluffiest tales
>won in a landslide
>expects people to not go with more fluffy tails

seriously, people in this thread are insane.

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"So what is the deal with this place"

You aren't happy, it's bad enough that all of this is so strange and unfamiliar, but a frigid bitch being frigid and a bitch with you isn't what you need at the moment.

"This is Flognarde. It's a world that runs para-"

She looks at you, some part of her hair folds backwards. Her spine-parasite droops downward in defeat.
She continues,

"It's a place that's like where you came from. Only there's some differences here. You were brought here because you were chosen to help-"
You cut her off, "Ives never been helpful to anyone or anything."
"You can still change that, you know."
"But not for free, I won't."

She walks a bit further in silence before speaking up again.

"You know where we are going, right?
"A castle."
"And you know who lives in castles, right?"

You don't even dignify that with a response.

She answers for you,
"Kings, Queens, Nobility, large sums of treasure and money. Why would we be visiting a castle that asked for your help if they did not plan to pay you?"
"I've been screwed enough times to know-"
"Here"
She is extending her hand toward you, in it is a small pouch in soft linen.

You open the pouch, to find several sparkling nuggets inside.

My god, this is the largest sum of gold that you've ever actually held in your hand!

"I've read books before about heroes, your world thinks this stuff is worth a lot, right? Take it, consider it an advance payment to keep walking with me and not go fleeing into the woods."

>>33804381
>your world thinks this stuff is worth a lot
bitch fuck you, throw it as far as you can

>>33804381
>sack of gold

yes, this pleases pirate

>>33804426
No, son, that's not the pirate way.

We play along until we find out where they store the gold, get a big ol' bag full of it, and then we run.

>>33804468
Are we really dumb enough to ignore her blatantly telling us that gold isn't shit?

>>33804468
>We play along until we find out where they store the gold, get a big ol' bag full of it, and then we run.

Let's not play a dumb pirate okay?

>>33804468
Nigga fuck gold, we gotta get dem magic crystals, or whatever the fuck is worth something around here

>>33804485
>>33804501
>Not wanting to conquistador it up.

Plebs.

>>33804426
This, and ask what kind of currency they have.
Yahhrrr.

>>33804485
Given that she only mentioned it after we'd already opened the bag and looked inside, the information probably washed right over us. Besides, it not being worth much here just means we get even more to take with us.

>>33804533
>implying we can sail back home
>implying conquistadors ever had happy endings

>>33804556
Yup. Any negotiations for payment should include wagonloads of the stuff if it's so worthless to them.

>>33804533
Yes. Having not a damn clue where we are and if/how we can get home and not wanting to fuck things up before we know makes me a pleb? Fine. Better than a retard.

>>33804593
QUESTS ARE SRS BSNS is out in force today, it seems.

>>33804607
It's simple fucking logic man.

>>33804627
This we are a pirate, we want shit thats worth a lot, not a currency worth nothing where we are currently located

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>>33804381
You don't like how casually she just handed it to you, you imagine it might be fools gold, or worse, completey devalued here as there might be a local mine of some sort. You've heard stories of it happening before to island nations that had blockades on their ports, govenors trading vast sums of gold for enough food to feed their families.

But still, you can't ignore this.

"rrrrRRRR OKAY FINE."
"I'm glad there's at least something about you that I can understand."

"What do they want from me anyway, all I know how to do is count cards and swab decks."

"You have been summoned here as a 'Hero'. I don't really know why they decided to bring one here now of all times. It might be to win the war that's been going on."

"War?"

"Every few years, Biscotti, the place you are right now, has a war with the neighboring nation, Galette. It's to keep both of their standing armies in good condition and their villages on high alert in case something serious happens."

"Are you saying there's something more serious than a War?"
Then another thought hits you
"Waitaminute, I'M NOT FIGHTING IN YOUR WARS."

>>33804685
Sure, i can fight your war. Just give me a ship, a crew and a letter of marque and reprisal.

>>33804801
WAR AND PLUNDER, FUCKING X HOW DARE YOU Y

>>33804801
Nah, our dude does not seem the blood and thunder type.

>>33804801
We do have a captains coat. We can totally become captain of a ship crewed by fluffy tails.

>>33804801
I'm fine with it as long as we get to keep the shit we find/liberate from the not so alive

>>33804685
I wonder how long before they regret their choice of hero.

>Participate in stupid "war" games
>Encounter enemy champion
>Challenge them to a sword fight
>Quick-draw pistol and put a shot through their face (we do at least have one, right?)
>DISHONORABLE PIRATE VICTORY

>>33804892
Blame the stupid fox that showed us the contract.

>>33804685
>>33804801
I'm fine with this.

>>33804843
True, but we can raid merchant ships or force them to surrender, depends on the geography.

>>33804892
I think they're starting to regret it already.

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>>33804685
She sighs
"It's not what you think, really."

"I'm not fighting ANY war without a ship, a crew, and a letter of marque. If you think I'm going to line up on a grass field with powderstick and yell 'shoot me! shoot me!', then you're sorely mistaken."
"It's not dangerous to anyone participating. It's just practice."

Practice. A Practice war?

"Especially not to you. Stand still for a moment."
You stop in a very impatient stance
"Now. From your standing position, Jump as high as you can."

You sigh in defeat, adjusting your legs, you spring as forcefully as you can from the ground.

Looking down, you notice that Atsuko is now merely a tiny ant, along with most of the trees and the landscape.

"What the RAAAAAAARRRGGGGGH"
Whump
You gracefully land face-first at the bird's feet.

>>33804939
OH MY FUCKING GOD, FUCK BEING A BITCH BOY PIRATE, WE ARE FUCKING JESUS, WAR AND PLUNDER, LOOOOOOOT

>>33804939
What the fuck! Is this Voodoo ?

>read last thread

Should've went with Captain John "Black Jack" Geary for the Pirate.

I'll be surprised if anyone actually gets it without Googling.

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>>33804939
>our future

>>33804979
Considering I was the one who suggested black jack specifically because of those books, you'd be wrong

>>33805000
>what is he doing
>i bet him a bag of gold he couldn't jump to the moon
>I WILL HAVE THAT FUCKING GOLD YOU PARASITE INFESTED SHIT

>>33805021
Still wouldn't fit as John's a chivalrous sort. Will be lurking to see where this goes.

>>33805035
>makes it to the moon
>all his hair falls out

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>>33804939
Even though you should have just broke every bone in your body, you feel just fine.

"WHAT WAS THAT?"
No one answers.
You're feeling better than fine, actually. You spring up back to your standing position, you dust off your fine coat to notice Atsuko walking away without you. She seems oddly silent events that just occured.

Another half hour of walking continues, one thing that you notice is that your legs would normally be killing you at the moment. Usually a spot in your right leg would be acting up right about now, making walking to be a very painful task. Yet, you don't feel any tire or wear. It feels almost as if you're walking around in a dream.

There's a terrible thought,

"Am I dead? Was I struck by lightning at the shoreline and I'm merely a ghost awaiting judgement in the halls of purgatory?"

Atsuko doesn't answer, and increases her brisk pace.

"We're here." She says,

Certainly, in the distance are guards and villagers, mulling around and lost in discussion outside of a large gate.

One of the guards waves at Atsuko, she briskly waves back.

"Come on." she finishes as she picks up the pace and hurries toward the gate. The guards wave us pass as we walk up to the entrance. Marking the first time that guards have never hassled you for anything.

>>33805235
Befriend the guard and drop him a few coin.
Just to be sure.

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>>33805301
>>33805235
You're always certain to keep in friendly terms with the guards, no matter where you are.

Atsuko gets off her bird and hands it off to a guard, who leads it away. Now would be a good time to get friendly with the people who may recognize your face.

You walk up to a guard at the door,
"Heya, Good weather today, right?"
The guard seems taken aback
"Er. Yes. Just doing my job!" He laughs slightly
He's nervous, perfect.
"Oh, you know what? I think my brother may have passed by here some time ago, he can be a bit thick sometimes."
You take some of your gambling winnings from the other day out,
Now you put on the healthy smile, "If you see him again and he's gotten himself into trouble, be a friend to him, would ya?"
You slip some of the money into his coatpocket.
"Because after all, that's what friends do for each other, right?"
"Uh, err, Yeah, whatever you say?"
"Ha ha, great!"

You hear a sigh coming from behind you.
"Just. Get. Inside." Atsuko sounds displeased as she stomps past the
guard, pushing you inside the doors.

"Har! Speaking of which, you didn't answer my question earlier! Am I off to meet Lucifer!?"

>>33805521
>we just fucking bribed a guard with worthless currency
>he is confused/afraid of this/us
>the parasite queen is not happy with this

>>33805565
All in character

>>33805586
God I love us

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>>33805521
A girl in some really elaborate dress, and a much less noticible tail parasite, notices the commotion and walks up to the both of you

"Atsuko! What brings you all the way out here?"
"I didn't want to wait for the princess to show up, so I summoned the hero. But I think I got a defective one."

The new girl nervously laughs.

"He's your problem now, so I'll leave him off to you."

She walks away, looking slightly disgusted.

The young girl tries to call out to her,
"Hey! Wait! The princess isn't around yet! Don't you want to-"
"Yar! And goodbye to you too!"

She's gone, looks like today may be looking up!

"Er, um."
The girl studders, that's fine, anything is better than being with the ice queen.
"Is there.. anything you want to see until someone gets back?"

>Tour of the castle! (particularly around the parts with the most gemstones and valuables)
>Ferget this! I'll just find my own way around
>How about I look at your Arrrrmory
>Food! I've been living off jerky for the past week
>Hold on, are those pointed ears on your head?
>Other?

>>33805521
i fucking love this.

>>33805674
>Hold on, are those pointed ears on your head?
Inbreeding for sure.

>>33805674
>Food! I've been living off jerky for the past week

We didn't even get a chance to get a good meal in us in between getting off the ship and being kidnapped by a magical fox.

Also,
>Hold on, are those pointed ears on your head?

>>33805674
>Food! I've been living off jerky for the past week

>>33805674
>>Hold on, are those pointed ears on your head?

>>33805674
>>Hold on, are those pointed ears on your head?
EAR PARASITES AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

>>33805674
>>Food! I've been living off jerky for the past week
>>Hold on, are those pointed ears on your head?
First the tail-parasites and now this?! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

>>33805674
>Hold on, are those pointed ears on your head? Touch it!

>>33805674
>introduce yourselfin french
>ask her name

>>33805786
Seconded

>>33805786
Yes. Touch the ears. Give in to temptation.

>>33805674
Are parasites our jew?

Can we please get past the whole parasites thing? It's not really funny anymore.

>>33805853
For a pirate, there is nothing wroste.
Hair parasites. Guts parasietes.

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>>33805886
For you.

>>33805886
No, get out PIDF

Ears and food! I like that!

Writing!

>>33805886
We just need to subject the ears and tail to a thorough inspection to satisfy ourselves that they're natural and not really parasites.

INSPECT THE GIRL

>>33805886
Flatworm detected.

>>33805967
Arrrrrrrr
Holy shit a pirate quest in a land of fluffy tail, muh dreams come true. is it in the archive?

>>33805886
I still think its funny

You know, I really expect the first time we meet a demon we'll be like "Oh, just another fur parasite" and then someone has to scream at us that no, this really isn't normal.

>>33806109
>fucking red/horn parasite
>NO THAT IS NOT A PARASITE COME OVER HERE NOW, STAY AWAY FROM THAT
>Bahhhh all the parasites so far haven't been dangerous
>GOD DAMN IT

Question, if we are an ignorant pirate, how the fuck do we know what a parasite is?

So can we super jump?

Do we have super powers?

>>33806174
When they give us one of their magic weapons, yes. Until then just superstrength

>>33806165
Personal experience.

>>33806208
Did we pee in a river in africa and get one of the little things that swim up our urethra?

>>33806233
That's the amazon, zippy.

>>33806165
Ever been in a swamp? Or anywhere tropical? Anyone who has knows what a parasite is based off personal experience.

The only suspect thing is that he's using a vaguely scientific term, but whatever.

>>33806233
yes, we tried to beat off for days to get it out, and that is why only we swab the deck from now on.

>>33806270
>ARM THE CANNONS
>GIVE ME A MINUTE I THINK I GOT IT

>>33806133
>THAT ONE ACTUALLY IS A PARASITE
>psh, you're the one that keeps saying your fur parasites aren't

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"Hello charming lass, I am Jacques Albator, but you can call me-"
Wait, that thing on her head, it just twitched.
"Ah, kind sir. I'm Alicot Aujus. I'm one of the princesses top maids here at the castl-"

It did it again.

"-at any time, great hero!"

You can't stand for this.

"Excuse me. There's something stuck in your hair."
A blush forms across her face.
"R-really? I spent so much time trying to get my hair just right, too! I hope no one noticed!"

Her hands start running through her hair and over her scalp, but it doesn't actually knock the offending lumps off her head. Her fingers run over them and around them, they simply bend around the folds of her hands.

"No no, I mean these, here."

You put her hand onto her scalp and wrap your index finger and thumb around one of the semi-erect shapes that have misshapened her hair. Immediately they twitch and squirm at the warm grasp of your hand.

The girl squeaks at this sensation
"AH! mm hnng, m plea.. Please not here... no"

That's strange, they're not coming off. You rub your thumb over the lacy rolls of softness on the inside. The heat of your hand warms the folded skin up as your fingers find new textures on the outset of the area.

".Heheh.. That kind of. I... kaaha... Oh."

You're perplexed at the feeling, it's like running your hands along the softest downy pillow that you've ever touched.

Looking down at the girl, she has her face buried in her hands, and something under the back of her skirt is flopping back and forth.

You gently touch the tip

"EEK, NO, STOP"

Something grabs your hand and wrenches it off her head.

"I really can't leave you alone for a minute." Atsuko says, grasping your hand in such a manner that it would twist off if you weren't invincible.

She pulls you along behind her.

"So where are we going?"
"To eat. I haven't had anything all day, and you apparently need to learn where to keep your hands."

Alicot stands perfectly still, face still buried in her palms.

>>33806575
Her mouth said no, but her body said yes.

>>33806575
>wagging tail
yes this is my fetish

>>33806575
>note to self
find maid and figure out what those were so we can be sure we didn't catch anything from touching them with our bare hands

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>>33806575

>>33806644
You mean wagging parasite

>>33806677
Fluffy fluffy parasites...

>>33806713
The only way to save all these girls seems to be to rub the parasites.

>>33806731
I love this quest

>>33806731
Yes this to... save tham yes.

>>33806743
But what about the grumpy one, she doesn't want us to rub the parasites....wait, she must be brainwashed, we must get them off her first!

>>33806575
Did she expect us to know we weren't supposed to play with parasites?

>>33806794
She seems to expect us to know a lot about the barbaric customs around here. Fairly common for insulated tribes.

>>33806814
>we take the moral high ground
>we never know what we did wrong
>we never know whats happening
>we still think gold is worth anything
>we still bribe guards

>>33806864
>Girls accept that we think they are parasites, take advantage of it and ask us to rub them anyway.

>>33806916
>turns out, pirates are very good with their hands

>>33806916
Oh god yes please
>we start up business as a doctor in our spare time when we aren't playing war
>we charge gold
>people come to get their parasites rubbed
>we think we're helping these people
>they are getting rubbed
>we are a whore who only takes a worthless currency

>>33806952
From pirate to doctor, thats a damn good step up

>>33806995
'doctor'

>>33806947
>Along with...other appendages.

>>33807055
Yes, doctor. We even got a fancy piece of paper that says so, that nice red man with horn parasites gave it to us

>>33806952
>we get a ship and sail their sea plundering other ships
>we interrogate our prisoners with parasite rubs to learn the trade routs and times of other merchant ships
>word gets around and people start to get captured on purpose

A-Ah! i-i'll never talk!, Fuwaaaaah~

>>33807093
>we just think we're really good at being a pirate

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>>33806575
Atsuko sighs in frustration as she drags you along into a large room, one that looks like it could easily seat a hundred people.

She throws you into one of the chairs at a table where a guy is sitting.

"Sit here, and keep your hands, to, yourself. I'm going to go talk to the maids and get us food. I don't trust them coming in here with you."

She walks out the door, leaving you sitting at the table with a young man sitting across from you. His face is buried in a book that he's reading. He has the same hair deformities as the maid, even sharing the same brown color.
He notices your presence and mark his place, loosely holding the book in hand.

"Oh, hey! You must be that guy Atsuko was dragging around. She usually doesn't take to other people that fast. What's your name?"
"Jack. Jack Albator. Yourself?"
"Ah, my name is Aligot Aujus. I'm one of the best archmages that works here at the castle."
"Aujus? Do you know a maid around here?"
"I see you've met my younger sister! Great girl, she is. Probably too shy for her own good."
"Ha ha yeah."
I met her.

"What brings you around these parts?"
"Oh, I was summoned by someone an-"

He drops the book, his jaw falls open.

"Er. You. But the princess was supposed to do it."
"Yar. The lass got bored and did it herself."

Atsuko walks back to the table. He immediately questions her.

"Atsuko? You didn't do the summoning spell yourself, did you?"
"Why does it matter?"
"Because, that spell had a 'contract' portion to it. One that ties the hero to the user. You didn't really..."

Atsuko face turns blank, and says nothing, she only lays her head down onto the table, and whimpers softly.

>Say/do anything to brighten the mood?

>>33807129
PET HER PARASITES BETTER

>>33807129
Rub her head parasites, shell feel better!

>>33807129
Are those things on your head parasites too?

>>33807129
Yarr define bound...

>>33807129
Ask about the head parasites. Don't touch them, they might get you.

>>33807129
So wait, I'm stuck with Ms. Grumpy here? Please tell me you're joking.

>>33807180
>>33807164
>>33807163
>>33807158
Lets save parasite things for later so we can keep milking it to give out headrubs to people we don't know

Also we should be distraught that we have a contract we didn't sign with mean lady

>>33807129
>>33807163
This pet parasites! Do it!

>>33807129
pet her parasites while whispering "I'm a doctor" over and over again

>>33807129
Pat her on the head & ask the dude about the parasites. He seems smart.

>>33807129
>that spell had a 'contract' portion to it. One that ties the hero to the user.

YARR, EXPLAIN FURTHER

>>33807211
Not yet, anon.

>>33807211
I lol'd at how incredibly creepy this would be.

>>33807129
Ask them why we're in Shanghai

>>33807204
this but more piratey

Yarr dat aint a funny jib, i cant be anchored down by no grumpy lass

>>33807211
>>33807221
>>33807209
keep our hands to ourselves JUS FOR NOW
>>33807206
this anon gets it

>>33807249
She'd feel betarrrr if she got rid of her parrrrasite

>>33807211
YAR LASS, I BE FIXIN YER ILLS FOR A FEE.

>>33807249
Maybe, If i knew what a jib was. I don't like the cut of your jib

>>33807270
PIDF detected

>>33807292
What does PIDF mean? Person I'D Fuck?

>>33807292
PIDF?
>>33807249
This but less stupid sounding.

>>33807306
>>33807312
Parasite Internet Defense Force

>>33807291
Pretty sure its one of those smaller more forwardy sails...

>Not bound to loli kitsune princess
Life of a pirate is suffering

>>33807427
Wait, wasn't green hair the one who summoned us?

>>33807427
Such is the life.

Back

Also

>CONTRACTS?!

Writing!

>>33807427
you mean life of a fluffy parasite doctor is suffering

>>33807516
See better version of your post here >>33807093

>>33807516
Yes...no loli you make me sad......

>>33807516
You know, were going to thin we're a doctor and the people around us will humor us, but to our victims we will be "The Dread Pirate Jack, Molester of the Seven Seas"

>>33807578
its not molesting if they love it, and that last one was waving her parasite real happy like

>>33807578
"The Dread Pirate Jack, Molester of the Seven Seas"

We need to stay a pirate not a "doctor" we have no reason to suddenly become a doctor anyways all we know how to do is probably put cloth over a bleeding wound maybe eat fruits to combat scurvy

It was definitely keiko canele that summoned us, not atsuko.

>>33807630
Dude everyone knows you can rub and kiss stuff better

>>33807635
We must figure out a way to swap our contract with the loli

Theres a loli right?

>>33807669
Jesus christ, shut up about your lolis.

>>33807603
That's what they will call us anon, but they'll blush real hard and then mention how gentle we were.

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The maids walk in with a platter of food, it could easily feed half of the crew back on your ship, or one-half of the quartermaster.

A maid walks in holding a few pints of some kind of liquid. You can clearly see that it's the maid that has the hair infection.
"Here you go! I got the wine you like, Atsuko."

Only a slight groan escapes from her.

"Thanks Sis, can you run upstairs next and make sure the wash is done? I think I forgot about it earlier."

She happily agrees and takes the plates away, leaving all three of you sitting silently at the table.
Wait. Wait a minute.
"Yarrr. What is this about some here 'Contract'?"
"Exactly what it sounds like, Mr. Albator. When you came here, you signed a contract with the person who brought you. I guess that means it's her."

"Look here, mate. The only contracts that I would sign end with a big pile of riches waiting for me when I complete it.

And furthermore, I ain't the kind of guy to be anchored down by some grumpy lass!"

Atsuko says nothing, Aligot only sighs.

"Like it or not, it seems you two are stuck with it."
"Then I want out!"
"I don't know if there is actually a WAY out."

This kills the wind in my sails, I tells ya.

>>33807683
Shit nigga calm down, lolis are fine as long as they aren't sexualized

>>33807698
Seriously, these people are hustlers. Kidnap a guy for just looking at a piece of paper and say that they signed a contract for life.

>>33807698
But we signed a contract with that one chick, not grumpy bitch

>>33807778
>>33807683
Both of you suck, loli is for sexual

>>33807827
>>>/a/

>>33807827
this ain't the quest for you, get out

>>33807812
OH SHIT YOUR RIGHT! WE SIGNED A CONTRACT WITH THE LOLI WE MUST VOICE THIS REVILATION

>>33807812
No, she just came to get us, grumpy did the summoning. Or at least that's what I thought.

>>33807836
>linking someone to /a/
>ever
Kill yourself, also lolis are best.

>>33807860
http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/33756640/#p33760529

She says she was the one summoning

>>33807836
>>33807846
>>>/out/
lighten up this is an imaginary game in an imaginary universe we can do whatever we want that includes tickling loli tails

>>33807871
It's your home. Are you too good for your home?

>>33807894
tickling and sexualizing are two different things nigga

>>33807698
"But she wasn't the one there when I dropped from the sky."

Pedophiles pls go

>>33807698
Wait, so we were summoned by Atsuko?

But Keiko said she was the one who did the summoning when we appeared. Was that an oopsie, and Atsuko was really supposed to be the one who called us?

>>33807876
Huh, That is correct. It seems Announcer must have forgot

>>33807914
>not having a tickle fetish
>not wanting to tickle imaginary lolis till they pee themselves

>>33807876
Wasn't the contract in the show with the princess even though the loli did the summoning? I'm being serious here, I forget.

>>33807941
/d/ pls go

>>33807954
The princess did the summoning.

Assuming you're talking about pink hair.

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>>33807698
"No..." Atsuko says, raising her head.
"Hmm?"
"No. I wasn't the one who summoned him. I was only the one that signed the spell."

Signed it?

"You signed a spell but didn't actually use it? What for?!"
"I..I've never been very good at that spell stuff. It always seemed too complex for me, I never really picked up on it. I didn't want to ruin it so I gave it to someone who had some sort of talent in it."
"..You don't mean"
"Yes. I gave it to Keiko, she's the one who used it."

Keiko? Right, the Green-haired girl you saw after all this began. I think she was crying last you checked.

She pitches upward and starts to yell
"OH GODS, I bound a horrible monster to a little girl, that makes me the WORST HORRIBLE MONSTER EVER!"

"Har! I'm sitting right here ye know!"

"Hold on Atsuko, I don't know what the terms of the contract are, but if you signed it, he should be bound to you. Not her."
"A..are you sure?"
"Well, no, but I've never heard of a contract that was bound to a person who didn't sign it!"

All this is going right over yer head.

>>33807972
Yes I was. Guess OP made an oopsie then.

>>33807982
How the hell are we bound to something when we didn't sign?

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>>33807927
Then let us remind him, After we tickle the princess and avoid getting arrested since we bribed the guard right?

>>33807982
If we get a choice I choose the kid, she reminds me of us, if we weren't a grown man

>>33807927
>>33808000

Nope, she forgot

>>33808006
Technically, we signed it by accepting it I think.

>>33808050
That's an awfully broad definition of 'accept'.

>>33807982
If I had to choose, I'd go with Keiko. She's not a big grumpy grump.

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>>33807982
nooooooooooooooooo

>>33808062
Step forward
Now that you have stepped forward be aware that stepping forward pretty much means you give up all rights

>>33808074
No, she's just scared of us.

>>33808082
Fucking scammers.

>>33808074
>>33808033
I would also choose Keiko is there a way to figure out who is bound to who?

>>33807982
Yar, I like the kid better, she isn't a downer and she reminds me of me [YOUNGFEMALEFROMOURPAST.PNG.JAR.EXE]

>>33807982
"I am not a horrible monster you know. I'm a dashing rogue who was kidnapped to a very strange place by strange people and I have feelings too."

I just had to. Damn fingers just...went.

>>33808062
The show itself was a bit dickish about it as well: the protagonist had landed on the spell circle the dog put under his feet and the contract was REALLY tiny and in a language he didn't understand. It still counted as him accepting the contract.

>>33808111
This might be kinda a viable thing to say but add more yarrs less big words and more piracy in general

>>33808139
Pirates didn't actually say Yarr in every sentence, you know that right?

>>33808200
Yarr. Someone's walking the plank.

>>33808200
Yar, but pirate doctors do

>>33808111
>>33808139
Not the guy who wrote it but...

"Yar, I be not a monster! I'm jest a dang, good-lookin' pirate wot got filched to a queer land. Ye' be slanderin' me!"

>>33808225
i don't think our character talks like that we seem more charming and educated then that

>>33808328
Only by a little though

>>33808342
Enough to know the dangers of parasites

On an unrelated note, it's really hard to find pictures of dog girls who aren't lolis. It's putting a dent in my post time with how long it's taking.

Preparation, ho.

>>33808456
Post loli Announcer
Post it

>>33808467
Don't you have an FBI raid scheduled or something?

>>33808456
maybe farm the anime for screenshots?

>>33808456
Loli is good! It ok do it.

>>33808456
>it's really hard to find pictures of dog girls who aren't lolis
Not really? Do you not use Danbooru/Gelbooru?

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Me, to the rescue!

>>33808493
Don't be upset anon if thats all he can find thats all he can find and we can just pretend its a grown up

Aslong as it meets blueboard standards anyways

>>33808537
Wrong image.

File: 1396671002456.gif (2.75 MB, 230x173)

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>>33808584
You think?

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>>33807982
"Har, I didn't sign any contract, yet it's bound to me. It's not like I'm some king of horrible monster."
"Later, Jack, this isn't the time"

The hell this isn't the time! You've been roped into a deal that you never agreed to!

Footsteps echo at the doorway. Followed closely by a woman's voice.
"WILL YOU WHELPS QUIET- Oh, Atsuko? What's the commotion all about?"

She jumps up and throws herself into the arms of the new girl.

She stands quite a bit taller than all of you. And she's filled out in all the right places.
Wait, she's looking at you with accusing eyes, you suddenly take an interest in her hair.

Okay now she's looking away. You go back to staring at all the places she's filled out in.

"FRITELLI, SOMETHING TERRIBLE HAS HAPPENED AND IT'S ALL MY FAULT."
"There. There. Calm down. It's probably okay."

The two stand there hugging. Which means it's probably time for you to eat as much food as you can before she sits down and tries to take the rest of it, har.

You eat for a few minutes before standing up to greet the new girl. Atsuko sits back in her place and continues sulking.

"Ma'am, I'm Jack Albator, at your service."
"Charming! I love men who can pretend."

Ouch, lass.

She laughs at the expression on your face.

"Fritelli d'Salcia, I am the Armorer and Quartermaster for the royal guard."
"Har, you're more pleasant on the eyes than any Quartermaster I've ever met."
"Oh, please. Really." She laughs to herself. You still got it.

"What brings you to these parts?"

Aligot takes that question,
"He's the hero, Atsuko sum- Well, I'll tell you about that later. "

Her eyes light up.
"You're the hero!? I've been looking forward to seeing you! Come on, let me show you the armor, I cleaned it all up just for your arrival!"

>Yar
>Nah, I think there's still things here I need to do

>>33808736
>Yar, what kind of armor we talking about?

>>33808736
>Yar
As long as the gold keeps coming and you find me a way to get back home, I'm interested.

>>33808736
Also note

>armor

Is actually

>Armory

But I'm not deleting it again to fix it because captcha.

>>33808736
>>Yar
Take a sammich with us at least.

>>33808736
Yarrrrr!

>>33808736
Yes

Okay, Writing

Hey lads, while I'm writing, why not think of some weapons you would like to try out?

>>33808736
I for one cannot wait to see their faces when we pirate the shit out of their honorable combats.

>>33808817
Gunsword!

The ff13 one, where it shifts between forms, not the retarded ff8 one.

This lets us swashbuckle to our hearts content.

>>33808817
+5 Estoc

>>33808754
>>33808777
Oh. Uh, then...
>Yar. What kind of weapons ye got?

>>33808817
Well, I think our instinct would be something good for fighting on a ship: short cutlasses and rapiers, stuff like that. Depending on the tech level we came from, we might ask about pistols or something as well.

>>33808817
f-22 raptor

>>33808856
Change my vote from +5 Estoc to +5 rapier, second this guy.
Same weapon, give or take

>>33808817
I think a cutlass and a brace of two or four flintlocks would be most in character. He could also improvise with boarding axes and pikes.

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>>33808817
Pic related, Maybe a cool rapier or something too

>>33808817
Gunsword or a rapier

>>33808817
Revolver.
Only instead of each chamber holding a bullet, each releases a different magical effect if aligned with the barrel.
So one rapid fires weak magic blasts like a SMG, one fires massive ones like a cannon (chargeable for extra devastation), one fires disruptor bolts that screw up barriers, one is a flamethrower etc...

>>33808903
Explosive/Magic rounds.

>>33808817
Yeah a rapier.

>>33808817
Gunsword in the form of a pistol and cutlass

>>33808817
Rolling for some decent leather armor too.
Heavier armor would fuck our mobility.

>>33808817
twin sabers, several hidden daggers, at least 6-7 pistols, hand axe/tomahawk, hand crossbow (or 2), easily hidden retractable blade (dishonored for reference)...am i missing anything?

>>33808992
Yes. The part where we only get one weapon.

Check out their magical guns and get an enchanted rapier, Pray for >>33808903
What else? Portable cannon with explosive rounds?

>>33808817
Take a look at a cutlass.

We are a pirate, after all.

>>33808975
or leather with a thin covering of a lighter alloy steel, just enough to stop a blade but not enough to weigh us down

>>33809035
>superstrength
>worrying about encumberance from armor

are you people literally retarded?