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shameless self bump

>>33787250
That's not an image about top tier roleplaying. That's an image about lucky rolls and GM fiat.

Can't find that damn cap of the raucous drunken paladin though, damn shame. That one was actual roleplay.

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>>33787250
hay OP I know you were looking for some funny shit but everyone with the pics are probably asleep so just come back tomorrow around 4-5 pm and you'll get better shit.

>>33787250

/r/ing Boxcar Joe, The Magic Hobo

>>33787250

>playing Dragonquest.
>One player is playing a "black mage", which is not usually the first or best choice for a heroic adventurer, but if he wants to play it, he can.
>Doesn't have alignment, but would definitely be NE if this was DnD, mostly sticking with the good guys for the money and the women.
>Just starting out, so everyone's puny.
>Get into incredibly petty argument with the innkeeper.
>Decides to lay a curse on him.
>Sneaks into the innkeeper's bedroom at night, (almost gets caught twice, as his stealth was shitty), has to attempt 3 times before he can get the lay curse spell to work.
>Finally gets it.
>Looks in the book.
>Is rank 0 with lay curse, so it's not very good.
>Finally decides to give the guy a wart.
>Runs around telling everyone how you should never cross a mage with ties to the nether world, and how his horrible wrath will fall on anyone who does.

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One of the best.

>>33787347
That's a legitimate 10/10 story.

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>>33787347
right in the feelings.

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>>33787792
Fucking amazing.

>>33787504
>i swear the tavern had to be some kind of 8th dimensional shape, because EVERYONE was in a corner away from everyone else

heh.

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>>33787250

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>>33788140
Fuck, man.

Someone wanted this, I think.

>>33788479

Dat's ahsum, man

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The Tale of the Demigods

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This one's a little more academic

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>>33788551

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>>33788568

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>>33788588

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>>33788597

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>>33788617

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>>33788638

The end.

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>>33787441

>>33788479
Still love this story.

>>33788551
>>33788568
>>33788588
>>33788597
>>33788617
>>33788638
>>33788653

One of the first stories I ever found on /tg/. I hope one day to have a campaign this good.

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STR check or be sucked out into space.
>Passes by 1

>>33788558
What is this, exactly?

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>>33788571
/tg/ only gets derailed for interesting subjects. You're trying waaaaay too hard, kiddo.

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>>33788975
more Traveller Shenanigans

>>33788876
One of my favorites of all time see you out there Joe.

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>>33789052
3/3

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>>33787250
Not roleplaying, but just /tg/ being awesome.

>>33789090
Ha, well thats cool

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>>33787250

Here's a classic.

>>33789018
Metric system is cool and all but it's fucked up that it uses decimal instead of dozenal.
>1/2 is .6 or .5
>1/3 is .4 or .3333...
>1/4 is .3 or .25
>1/5 is .24444... or .2
>1/6 is .2 or .6666...
HMMMMMMMMMM
I wonder which system will be more usable for average people when baking or conducting trade?

And don't give me that shit about counting on 10 fingers. Count how many digits you have on the non-thumb fingers on each hand. Go on.

First rpg was Star Wars.

Made a wookie.
Tried to swim.
Drowned.

Character took me four and a half hours to build because I didn't know what the fuck I was doing.
Died in twenty minutes of gameplay.

Raged for days son.

>>33789254

Base 60 is actually the oldest counting system, based on each segment of finger and each knuckle. (the bottom of the palm counted as part of the thumb back then)

>>33787504
Holy fuck
This is /tg/'s Bizarre Adventure, that Xero guy is literally DIO

>>33789405
Old isn't the point. Utility is. 60 is bigger than a human brain can easily grasp in the way it can grasp 10 or 12. I mean 60 characters for numbers is more than twice the characters of common western alphabets. 12 is the number in the ~0-20 range with the most factors, and it's easy to count on one hand. And since you can count to 12 on one hand, you can use the other for the 12s digit. That means you can count up to one gross on two hands. Much better than 10.

>>33789501

I would say "old" has a point in that it was used before science got anywhere.
I guess you could argue that since writing and knowledge were so uncommon that it was only used by the geniuses, though.

>>33789517
>I guess you could argue that since writing and knowledge were so uncommon that it was only used by the geniuses, though.
Yes, especially since primitive cultures tend not to have words or concepts for specific numbers past 4ish.

>>33789429
Yeah I plan to live up to that dream sometime soon.

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one of my favorites

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We all got a moral dilemma with a RPG, one day or another.

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I've got one or two

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>>3379066

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RATTLERATTLERATTLE

>>33787504
Beautiful

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>>33787504
Found some fan art

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>>33792224

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>>33790729

>>33788051
>>33789429
>>33790972
>>33792224

Okay, we get it.

You're really proud of yourself for stringing together more than six words and completing a terribly predictable and largely unreadable sea of greentext that only lesser people would dare deign as a story.

Now can you stop pretending it's a good story and posting it in Good Story threads?
I don't even know why you try to inflate it so much, when you should already know that a plot full of so many holes would never be able to hold any air.

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>>33792358

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>>33787792
This story still gives me a hard-on when I read it.

>>33792381
Call me a critic.

Basically, it's unjustifiably bad, a story that's only saving point is that it pushes the single note of "Underdog Triumphs" so relentlessly that it becomes the ultimate "This is how you should not write an underdog story" bible.

From shoddily revealing how he's going to win in the first few lines and practically double-highlighting it so that the rest of the work is just a series of largely pointless words meant to exaggerate what most outsiders would call a meaningless and exceedingly petty conflict, to the unlikable protagonist and an equally unlikable supporting cast who are neither believable nor sentient beyond the constraints of their defined roll in the story, there's really nothing here except a poorly conceived, executed, and presented mish-mash of passive-aggressive adolescent fantasy.

It's the kind of story you'd be ashamed to submit to any kind of publication. Hell, you'd be ashamed to submit it to your third grade English teacher.

>>33792480
Reading it wrong.

"Guy plays in shitty freeform RP with shitty people. Figures out how to break the game. Delicious cunt mod tears. DON'T LISE YOU WAAAAAY/RULES OF NATUUUUURE!"

>>33792531
You're presenting it wrong.

"Unlikable douchebag finds an obvious loophole that was basically built into the rules just so he could exploit it, and proceeds to antagonize people on a freeform RP who don't play in the way he wants them to."

Basically, we're looking at a story about a guy who doesn't just go out and do something else, but instead decides to troll, because that's somehow noble and heroic according to the logic of this story.

>>33792531
I got more of a JoJo's Bizzare Adventure feel from it.

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>>33790729
Can't. Stop . Laughing

>>33792591
>but instead decides to troll

Is that somehow a problem now? I only see this kind of whining on /tg/. So what? A lot of humor comes from the misfortune of others.

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>>33787250

Best necromancer ever, coming through.

>>33792703
I remember that thread.

>>33792921

I was in this thread. The feels are real. The feels never stop.

>I'M NOT SUFFERING

>>33792889
Yeah, but the Ed story isn't funny.
Or clever. Or anything other than some person's (or persons', though I doubt more than four would join such a cabal) rather transparent attempt at forcing a meme.

Between the exaggerated upvoting on suptg (done in the same manner as the oinkbane story, which is often uttered in the same breath as this story) and the "Best of /tg/ threads" posted solely to promote it, always with 4 or 5 posts quoting how AWESOME it is when all other stories largely go uncommented, it's gotten to the point where I think the writer has forgotten how much of a pile of shit his story is, a fact he reveals to anyone foolish enough to waste their time reading it.

>>33788140
Crying in the public library now.

Capta: Suffering rsemny

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>>33787504
B-banzai...

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>>33793165
>>33792591
>>33792480
>>33792358

>objectively bad
>I'm a critic
>it's not funny because I said so

I fucking love you /tg/

>>33792358
>>33792480
>>33792591
>>33793165


This. A million times this.

It's just not that great of a story.

It's not the worst thing ever written, but it's just barely mediocre and there's people pretending it's the greatest thing since sliced bread.

>>33794975
I'm sorry but sliced bread is for faggots

>>33795014
Indeed. A true man cut his bread on his own.

>>33795051
Guess what we call bread you cut on your own?

SLICED BREAD.

More importantly,
>>33795014
>>33795051

Doesn't seem like you have heard of this thing called "expressions."

Kind of shows why you like the Edgardo story so much. Limited mental facilities.

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>>33795128
>autist doesn't get a joke

more news at eleven

>>33795157
Jokes got to be funny, man.

Also, nice maymay.
*tips trilby*

>>33795157
Don't you have to be at least 18 to post on this site?

Why are you here, child?

>>33795228
too bad for you I guess

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>>33787347
That... oh dear that's fantastic.

>>33788653
Best /tg/ story ever. Thanks for sharing it,anon.

>>33787735
Did he ever tell us how the GM's other players reacted?

>>33792358
>>33794975
Hi Xer0

>>33795730
>implying xero was real
>implying any of that story was real

The Edgardo Defense force, ladies and gentleman.

>>33795767
maybe if you presented yourself better You wouldn't sound like the people in that RP

>>33795808
Maybe if you stopped trying to promote your story and actually learned how to compose a coherent sentence, you'd graduate from kindergarten.

>>33795767
We all want to forget our past.

>>33787504
GREAT SHAKES this is beautiful. A valiant triumph over douchebaggery and faggotry.

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Girls, please, you are both pretty.

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now a tale of faggotry to ruin the mood

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>>33795896

>>33787504
This story will forever weird me out because i used to RP with a person named xero

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>>33795937

>>33795850
You do realize that it's not the author who's always reposting that thing, right?

>>33793275
This one always gets me.

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>>33796506

>>33789010
An anon asked what the point of each of the 40K legions was since a lot of them seemed to be redundant or contradictory. Another anon went and explained what the original intention was before each Primarch was spirited away and changed by their home world

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>>33796538

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>>33787347
As many times that I've seen this posted in a story thread, I never once actually read it until now, and I hate myself for waiting so long.

Bravo, Anon. 10/10 would ally with for glorious combat.

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>>33787504
Absolute waste of time. I hate all of you that recommended this.

>>33788551
>>33788568
>>33788588
>>33788597
>>33788617
>>33788638
>>33788653
Thank you so much for sharing this.

>>33787347
Man, that shit is solid gold

>>33788876
That is so awesome it's spooky

>>33788558
>No Smurfs
Granted, not that I complain about this, but...eh. Pretty sure Rowboat's "perfect" as he was meant to be anyway. Jacks of all trades, masters of none.

>>33797139

>le so epic story!!11

Seriously who the fuck cares? The only reason stories are good is when you can imagine yourself in the situation or if it's just a really absurd or funny moment. If I wanted to read a short story I wouldn't read one written by some neckbear in greentext.

>>33797727
What exactly are you trying to say?

I really have no idea.

>The only reason stories are good is when you can imagine yourself in the situation or if it's just a really absurd or funny moment

I think I almost understand this, as in I almost understand what you are trying to say, but it's so painfully wrong that I'm genuinely worried about your well being.

Are you alright? Are you feeling sick?

>>33792591

>My fun > your fun

Yeah, you sound like a cunt.

>>33798340
He's not the one defending an indefensible story.

You Edfags are the worst cunts on /tg/.

>>33798340
Isn't the whole story about a guy who thinks his fun is superior to the other people's fun, to the point where he masochistically strives to do nothing but ruin their fun simply because they disagreed with him?

What we're looking at is an attempted glorification of a thatguy of the worst sort, and you somehow think it's a great story because he's flamboyant and takes advantage of a loophole that just about anyone could figure it within seconds of reading his explanation of the roleplay mechanics.

You can try to spin it one way or another, but beyond being a struggle to read through, it's really just not much of a tale.

>>33798641
>anyone who doesn't play a grimderp edgy faggot gets gangraped by all the other players
>the main antagonist literally cheated to get to where he is, no loopholes, just pure asskissing
also you can't call someone "that guy" for abusing a loophole when people can have a level count of infinity or control THE SHADOW INSIDE PEOPLE'S HEARTS

it's a post on an anonymous imageboard, get over yourself

>>33798741
>>anyone who doesn't play a grimderp edgy faggot gets gangraped by all the other players

It looks like that's the style of the forum. Kind of like going to a Chinese restaurant and getting upset they serve Chinese.
Also, please don't pretend that the events in the story happened. It makes you look a little crazy.

And he's not a thatguy for using a loophole specifically written for him to use. He's a thatguy for trying to upset a game that was clearly better off without him.

Finally, you're right. That story IS just a post on an anonymous board, and not a particularly good example of one.

On the other side of things, we've got
>>33787347
>>33788551
>>33790722
and many others in this thread and others like it.

They are also anonymous posts on an image board. But, even so, what makes them different from the Edgardo story is that these stories are actually good reads and belong in "best of /tg/" threads.

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C'mon foks what you're doing isn't best of /tg/ at all.

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Yet another /tg/ story thread, yet another vacancy where the Honeypot Couriers should be.

Number 1...

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and number 2.

>>33799120
now I want to play an undead cleric who gets rid of evil by showing them how evil you can be
>what? you think you're evil?
>THIS IS FUCKING EVIL
>you don't want to be evil anymore?
>my work here is done

>>33799907
>implying there are not magnitudes of evil just as there are magnitudes of good
>implying seeing a person more evil than me is a deterrent

>>33800029
The undead cleric is there to show you what lies at the end of your path, if you aren't evil enough you WILL turn back. Because once you're on the ride never ends.

>>33800092
>implying all evil is a slippery slope that leads to being mister bones

>>33800216
I'm implying that all evil is headed toward the ride, there is a short window where they can choose another ride and merely be selfish or angry. There is a single instant where they can look at what lies before them and leave before the next person gets in line. But after that the ride never ends.

>>33788479

I call bullshit.

Did no one notice how their hitpoints went up after he used Lay on Hands?

>>33800321
It's a metaphysical moral concept,Mr. Bones wild ride, for truly, such as life and existance, it does not end.

>>33800321
I have look back in mr.Bones wild ride and it look back into me and it never ends

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a war over the D

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>>33792703
>You have fulfilled the prophesy by fucking that girl to death!

>>33792480
*role

Does anyone have the screen cap of the Samurai, Wizard, Cat man. With the end being along the lines of battle is no place for old men and kittens.

>>33800359
GM Fiat, and/or the other players weren't the most astute and keen eyed lot, or maybe the gm just kept track of all health scores, telling the party how injured the characters were descriptively.

>>33801033
Eh, I'm gonna have to logically say that it's really unlikely that the story happened at all, but I'm at least willing to suspend my disbelief to treat the story as if it did happen.

/tg/, where all stories are fake, but we make them real.

>>33800359
They thought the fear rerolls and the hp were the DM apologizing for the guys behavior. Didn't you read it man?

>>33801238
>I'm gonna have to logically say
Please stop typing like that.
Just. Please stop.

>/tg/, where all stories are fake, but we make them real.
That's... neat? Good for you, champ.
But you're on the wrong board if you want to go around crashing through everyones make believe and fantasy with COLD LOGIC and MERCILESS DEDUCTION you euphoric fucknugget.
Please leave your enlightenment at the door.

>>33788140
actually that reminds me, doesn't the Rogue Trader's epic piece of paper..well, give them a surprising amount of authority to deal with xenos?

>>33801347
>fear
Free?

>>33801368
I think you confused me with the person who pointed out the plot hole.

Also, holy fuck, calm down, you sperg.

Also also, euphoric? Hoo, really digging into the past, aren't we?

>>33789090
remember that, this thread was helpful to some anons despite the hate

>>33801396
aura of courage.

>>33787347
Thanks, now I can recall how my father punched my mother, kicked my ass and then threw all my stuffed toys into the garbage when i was around 7

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>>33802585
I feel sorry for you, but this reminded me to post this story that I have saved previously.

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>>33802585
But you're a brawly, happy, manly man now, so it's all for the best
r-r-right...?

>>33789254

Okay, what's the digits for 11 and 12?

11 = 12-1
11 = 12+1

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>>33802757
And a comic version, because of reasons.

>>33788479

Some a-hole ruined this story for. He was basically doing the same thing except with internet memes and actively trying to sabotage the group. Eventually he got everyone killed and got smug about how they should have respected him more since he could have lay on hands.

Does anyone have love stories ?

>>33802820
Needs a proper ending from the emps

>>33787347

I'll never understand why people like this story so much: couldn't he just explain to the DM the reason of the stuffed toy? Why would someone keep something a secret from the DM?

>>33803354
Character reasons snowballing into SUPER DUPER MYSTERY

>>33803354
There wasn't a secret. He had the doll, he liked the doll, and he kept the doll. It was those facts alone that made everyone else suspicious irrationally.

>>33799014
Also I'm saving the Edgardo story and will be sure to post it in every future thread like this that I find, thanks to you.

>>33803354
there literally was no reason for the stuffed toy other than his DM really really wanted to take it away from him.

And when the DM did, he made it bite the guy right in the feels, for having been the one to "take away the thing someone loved"

>>33803354

Doesn't he explain in the story? He didn't have a backstory for it, and just for of blurted out that he wasn't telling, which made it into a bigger thing than it really was, which sparked the DM's hate-boner and eventual shame.

>>33803354
He made the story up on the spot. There was no story, it was just an item in his inventory and it bothered the DM that he had an item that didn't do anything. And that the item was a childish thing and not some random item that a true man would have, like a girlie mag.

>>33803434
>>33803424
>>33803420
>>33803415

Yes, but why couldn't he just say so?

"I have no particular reason, it's just that no one ever explained to him the toys are for children". Here, done, crisis averted.

Why would he ever think: "I decided to simply refuse that idea by not telling him the reason [. . .] and I had enough cheek to still ask for his "permission"? What was the point of that?

>>33789263

Your GM must have been a total prick

>>33803701
Man, come on: sometimes you just have to reign the DM in and tell the uppity litle bastard to go fuck himself. An epic story is more important than his stupid power trips.

>>33789263
>four hours
>twenty minutes
YOLO

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>>33802820
Welp, ok, I'm crying now.

>>33803701
Because DMs are assholes

>>33803784
>>33803746
These guys get it: fuck DMs

>>33803807
>>33803784
>>33803746

This sounds horrible: why would you think that about a man whose role in the group is trying to give everyone an enjoyable evening?

>>33803884
Because he's purposely going out of his way to give one player in particular a hard time.
Simply because he's a control freak that MUST know every facet of a characters life.

>>33803921

Yes, that particular DM was an ashole, but so was the player: why not just tell him the reason? The story clearly explains what the reason was in beginning, so why not just the DM? I honestly, for the love of my live, understand why he couldn't just tell him.

>>33803884
How many DMs have you played under did it to tell a story and to bring the players in? Probably not that much. Most DMs that I've had were always under the impression that fighting over 9000 hp monsters that do 6 gorillion damage at level 5 is "funny" and totally jokes. Essentially they have no idea how to actually develop a story outside of just making monsters that do damage.

There are ways of making the stuffed animal part of the campaign in some way if it really intrigued someone, trying to burn it is neither fun to anyone or good story telling.

>>33803977
Because fuck DMs. How is this hard to understand? If a DM wants to know everything about your character he's an autistic control freak and you should tell him to go fuck himself.

>>33803977
He did tell the DM but the DM didn't believe him. The DM just made a big deal out of it because reasons.

>>33803991

>How many DMs have you played under did it to tell a story and to bring the players in?

Every single one of them.

>Most DMs that I've had were always under the impression that fighting over 9000 hp monsters that do 6 gorillion damage at level 5 is "funny"

>Sounds awful: why don't you just tell them you don't think that's funny?

>>33804056
Yea i am going take a wild guess and say you got lucky on your DMs

>>33804034

>He did tell the DM but the DM didn't believe him.

No, no he didn't: the screencap clearly says that the DM asked him and that he didn't answer because "I got a sense that it wasn't really the mood to explain it. I just dodged the question".

What does that even mean? Why did he do that?

>>33804125
>What does that even mean?
You've never thought about saying something but then went "Nah, this isn't the time"?

>>33804114

I had problems with some of them, but we always resolved them when I explained what the problem was and we worked them out together, as a group. We had a DM whose games were far too lethal for the amount of background work he required, but we talked about it and he toned it down, adjusting his style to our requests. We had a DM whose games were role play only with absolutely no combat, but we talked about it and then we changed campaign to one more in line with our tastes. We also had a player who made super min-maxed characters, but we asked him to tone it down and he did it because he never realized he was overshadowing everyone else.

Why can people just talk about this stuff?

>>33804197
It's also possible that the conversation's pace didn't lend itself to it and/or someone else started asking a question or saying something, and then the DM was like "NO HOLD ON, I MUST KNOW", at which point player was like
>kek, now I'm def not telling

Then it became a thing because DM wouldn't just leave it alone

>>33804125
okay rereading it I guess he didn't but he does say he was going to then the DM started being a shitlord.

You could say that the whole problem would have been averted if he simply said "There is no reason", that's true. But we're humans Mr. Roboto and we do shit like this all the time.

>>33804197

But that was clearly the time: he was asked a question and there was no reason not to answer that question! Why not just answer the question?

>>33804269

The screen cap says:

"I got a sense that it wasn't really the mood to explain it. I just dodged the question".

It didn't happen by accident: he was asked an incredibily easy question to which he knew the asnwer and he decide not to tell. Why?

>>33804285

But then why is everyone talking about that screencap as if it was an amazing story, if it's just the memory of a mistake that snowballed into a long agony for everyone involved? It just does not compute!

>>33804375
Because they could relate to it. And the dm trying to get rid of the toy was just like all the parents thinking it wasn't appropriate. You're over analyzing it.

>>33804292
>>33804327
>>33804375
Listen, you don't get it and that's okay, but let us have this: most DMs are assholes and the story gave us feels. That's it, there's no other explanation to be found here.

>>33804292
>>33804327
Because there were more important things to worry about presently than the exact contents of a warriors backpack.
Like the Lich about to rain down fire and brimstone just 20 leagues over yonder.
The player probably just fumbled the answer "Okay well see it's just like... He was never just... Is this really the time? What's that scout we sent out doing, is he okay?"
stuff like that.
But seriously, obsessing over crap like this is unhealthy.

>>33804375
Well because it really is a nice charming, feelsy story. Also I think you're not reading the story right, no problem came out of it, no one was in agony, it carried sad undertone that the readers seem to enjoy.

If you just relax a little and stop over analysing it you would see it's a fun story.

>>33804416
>>33804415

Right, I don't get it: I see that his DM was an asshole and the parallels between him and the parents are clear, but how did it come to that? Why did he blow the DM off? Why din't he tell the DM that his attempts to destroy the stuffed animal were an assholish thing to do? Why is everyone talking about it as if the entire thing wasn't a petty fight between friends born out of stubborness?

>>33804521
We don't know, since we're not the player or the dm.

>>33804431

>The player probably just fumbled the answer "Okay well see it's just like... He was never just... Is this really the time? What's that scout we sent out doing, is he okay?"
stuff like that.

This is not what the screen cap says, and it also makes no sense on its own: if you're working on the character sheet, you're working on the character sheet, so of course it's the time.

"Why do you have a stuffed animal?"
"No reason, it's just a quirk. I guess no one ever explained to him that toys are for children"
"Ah, ok".

That's it. Five seconds to type it out. And when he saw this was somhow important to the DM, why didn't he just tell him that?

"Listen man, there's no point to it, it's just a little quirk. Also, stop being an asshole".

How is this hard? How is doing anything else a commendable course of action?

>>33803701
Nine people did tell that to their GM, and their stories went in different ways, different paths, and possibly never caught on here.

This one did it this way, and we retell, retell, retell.

Besides, have you never felt the desire to stick it in someone's eye, figuratively? Even if it's just a petty , mostly harmless little thing like that? I'd be surprised if you haven't.

>>33804589

But why do people think it's a nice, moving story? It sounds like there are problems between the player and his DM, which is sad, not bitter sweet.

Why are the player and the DM not friends? What happend between them? What brought the player to not giving an answer? What made the DM into such an asshole?

>>33804662
Nothing except our opinions. If you don't see it, that's fine.

>>33804624

>have you never felt the desire to stick it in someone's eye, figuratively?

Not to my friends. Sometimes we get angry to each other, but then we immediately talk about it and work things out.

I'm just very, very saddened at the idea of two friends spending so much time being passive aggressive dicks to each other.

>>33804695

Do you think this story is sweet? Why? Please, just tell me why do you think this story is sweet and not sad. I would really like to understand.

>>33804662
>>33804695

Pretty much this, if you don't like the story there isn't much we can say. I personally like it because the guy held out for so long and when the DM finally got his way something happened that he completely didn't expect.

>>33804739
I would answer you, but you seem to be genuinely interested in understanding my point view, and, well, I don't come to 4chan for sensible and well thought discourse. It's easier to call you a faggot and move on, brah.

>>33804745

>I personally like it because the guy held out for so long

But why is the idea of two friends being passive aggressive to each other for so long something that makes you like the story? Is it schadenfreude? Is the reason this story is enjoyable schadenfreude?

>>33804821
>>33804739
OH MY GOD, are you literrally a robot? Are you a machine? Do you usually post on /mlp/, where everyone is great and friendship is magic? Just fuck off.

>>33804745
>>33804739
>>33804774
>>33804821

This is one of those things that is felt on an emotional level. If you don't get it, all you can really understand is that something is there. Something which people can share, because they both feel it.

>>33804705
Don't think he ever said they're friends, bud.

Good on you, if that's how people work for/with you.

But some folks can't be talked down from assholishness, and maybe that's the player too, but that's not the essence of the storytelling.

The story? Odds are good it's not real, or at least that the reality of it does not really match the telling of it.

But its spiritual core, if you will, that resonates with people.

Because at the end of the day? The GM didn't need to know. He wanted to know, and that's fine, but we all have gaping, bleeding wounds, all the time. And learning to navigate those, that's a huge part of human-human interaction.

There were better ways this could have went down, probably should have went down. The GM shouldn't have pushed over something so unimportant, the player should have tried to talk to him about it before it got out of control, etc.

But there were few better ways to tell a story. And stories and games, even mildly spiteful ones, they grasp our lives fairly strongly. Resisting their sometimes darker nature, that's one of those skill checks we don't always pass.

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>>33792358
You can make all the posts you want about how shitty this story is but I laughed my ass off at the idea the first time I read it. Shit son, even the 'true' stories here are MADE UP SHIT IN A FANTASY UNIVERSE.

If it was truly as terrible as you seem to think it wouldn't keep turning up.

Sometimes the quality of the transcription really has abso-fucking-lutely nothing to do with how entertaining it is.

TL;DR You have a stick up your ass.

>>33804608
>is clearly the DM in the copypasta

>>33787250
Long story short
> playing 4th edition right after it came out
> Dwarf Warlord only at level 2
> some big fucking undead dragon skeleton attacks and seriously wounds the other 4 in our party
> DM wanted to save the dragon thing to be a miniboss at the end of our campaign so it starts to fly away
> my character, last standing, yells something along the lines of "too scared to finisg what you started you little bitch?"
> skeledragon turns around for another attack
>my dwarf flings his god damn warhammer at its face, using daily power
> natural 20
> the skeledragon just fucking shatters and I tell my team to get up and get their shit together
> Dwarf Warlord master race motivates with force

>>33802806
Different people have different solutions. You'd just have to have to use whatever convention you like. By the way,

>one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven, dozen, twodoz, threedoz, fourdoz.... levendoz, twenty, twentyone... twentynine, twentyten, twentyleven, thirty.

It's a change in counting that would take minutes to get used to. If even that. When the French based everything on ten they were being retarded and should have asked a mathematician, metric would be useful and respectable only in a dozenal system. It's much more useful for day-to-day operations and humans are completely used to thinking in it, e.g. time and most conversions the Americans do in their system.

>>33804842

Shit, I'm sorry, I didn't realize my questions were making you angry. Never mind, it's ok, I'll just figure it out on my spare time.

>>33804848

I can see something is going on here, since a lot of people seem to enjoy the story, but I just can't figure out what.

>>33804849

>Don't think he ever said they're friends, bud.

They are player and DM, of course they are friends. Why would they be playing together evening after evening if they were not friends?

>The GM didn't need to know.

But there was no reason to not tell him. You liked the story, didn't you? Maybe the DM would have liked the explanation; maybe he would have turned it into a plot hook; maybe he was curious about this weird thing one of his players was doing. When my fellow players do something weird I ask them why, because it's clear they have a reason for doing that and it's proably a funny reason. It's setting up a joke.

I mean, if some one says KNOK KNOK, don't you ask him "Who's there"? Yes, you dont' NEED to know, but if he's knocking it's probably because he wants to make a joke.

>>33804821
Friend, from your posts, if we take them at face value, you sound like you have a certain, eh...what's the word . A 'block'? I mean, certain things have trouble coming across to you, they maybe don't match up with you like they match up with the general populace.

That's fine. Hell, I've got my own, have to really think sometimes about some things, and sometimes have to just...accept that, it appears, certain things make sense to other people that don't make a lick of sense to me.

It's frustrating sometimes, but this might be one of those times where you just have to...relax.

The closest I can come to answering what I think your question is, on that note, is this: it's a bit of schadenfreude, but mostly respect for determination, how the story hits a lot of the beats of a good 'underdog' story, the bringing of righteous feels upon the 'villain', stuff like that.

>>33805018
Also helps with human-computer interactions. Binary, hexidecimal, and 8-bit all easily convert to and interact with duodecimal. And kind of shitty to decimal. It's just a weird trap that we're culturally stuck in and it causes a monumental amount of waste, google it. There's character hooks in all this nonsense. I can feel it.

>>33805028
You're making too big a deal out of iit. Its just a quirk of human nature. Forgive me for saying so, but the best way to understand human nature is not to ask questions, but to watch.

Basically, you have to accept that people act certain ways and never ask why.

>>33805028
>They are player and DM, of course they are friends. Why would they be playing together evening after evening if they were not friends?

Because they can't find other games? Because they never made it passed acquintance? Because each is treating the other like a set piece required for the game to happen, like a player and his laptop on vidya night?

>>33805046

>it's a bit of schadenfreude, but mostly respect for determination, how the story hits a lot of the beats of a good 'underdog' story, the bringing of righteous feels upon the 'villain

Ok, so the story is nice because the protagonist sticks to his guns, because the antagonist comes out of it in a losing position, and because two friends are acting weirdly unreasonable and that's schadenfreudly funny.

Ok, good, this is something I can understand. Thank you, now I can also enjoy that story.

Sorry if I was a bother and it took you time to explain this to me. I'm out.

>>33805090
I feel like there's some things to deconstruct in your post here, but I'm not sure I'm up to the task.

How about I just leave my contribution at replacing 'watch' with 'participate'?

>>33805177
I think that you're looking through a muddled glass, but if it works for you, aight.

>>33803354
>>33803701
>>33803884
>>33804056
>>33804125
>>33804254
>>33804327
>>33804375
>>33804521
>>33804608
>>33804705
>>33804739
Look at these posts.
Each one has a different question they all relate to the same thing, the creature posting is trying to understand the feels inspired by the tarrasque doll, but cannot comprehend them. Each question is a little different focusing on a different part of the implied feels.
In all of his examples of playing tabletop games and interacting with friends everyone involved settles their problems with reasonable discourse. There is no anger, fear, betrayal. Only logic. The poster can't understand the decisions made when a human is emotional. The poster is either a robot, devoid of feeling that seeks to compile our emotional responses into a set of phrases to mimic human emotion or some eldritch horror that seeks understanding of the human psyche to prepare for invasion. Do not reply to this creature, lest it learn from what you say and destroy us all.

>>33805018
as an american, forced to use Imperial in his daily life, screw you, "everything is ten" is way easier than:
1000-12-3-22-10-8-3 (distance)
1-5-2-2-2-4 (volume)
16-16-14-2-4-20 (weight)

>>33805121

Ok, one last thing:

>Because they can't find other games?
>Because they never made it passed acquintance?

That sounds awful: if they are not friends and they don't enjoy each other company, then why are they spending so much time together? Shouldn't they just ask their respective friends to play with them instead?

>Because each is treating the other like a set piece required for the game to happen, like a player and his laptop on vidya night?

Shit, that's nightmarish. Hanging out and playing pretend shouldn't be like buying a whore.

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>>33805203
Don't be absurd, spiders are your friends.
But joking aside, those posts and yours are beautiful: can somebody please screencap them?

>>33787250

>Playing DnD, adventure starts at first level.
>So we're not dealing with an existential threat here, a town's been seeing increased attacks by giant bugs that are native to the area, but so far, only 2 people have died, mostly it's just damage to the surrounding croplands.
>We get hired to investigate.
>Don't find any obvious leads, but there's this weird abandoned temple in the area that some monsters have settled in, and we kind of figure since it's the closest source of weirdness, we might find some clues there, and if not, well at least monsters and loot, right?
>Well, we do find some clues, and have this big fight at the end with a goblin cleric with a really weird and powerful magical stone that she was using to animate objects.
>It's actually the party monk that saves our bacon there, being able to escape from being grabbed by the rug, tumbling around the goblin guards in between us and her, grappling the gobbie cleric as she's attempting to wake up a brazier in addition to the rug, and grabbing the stone away from her, which stops the animated objects cold.
>We start looting the sanctum, and one of the things we grab is the once animated rug, which is still fairly valuable despite having picked up a few tears and bloodstains during the struggle.
>Head back to town with new information and some new lines of inquiry.
>Town is pretty small, only two inns, one a bit classier than the other, but it's basically a commoner/artisan divide, you don't get real upper crust types.
>Party bard, whom I think was chafing at the bit a little since we were mostly dungeon romping, wants to tell the story, IC, at the taverns.
cont

>>33805249
Have you seriously never encountered horrible people / toxic playgroups? Is everything so bountiful and perfect in your area that never have player problems, unreasonable DMs that do what they want over what the group wants, and if something WERE to ever happen you could just find/make a new group almost instantly.

You sound like you live in some gosh dang Utopia where "let them eat cake" is a reasonable suggestion.

If so, please tell me where to move. I want to be there too.

>>33805212
Nigger, you know you don't use most of those every day. Don't pretend. And like I said, metric is great... if it's base12. Or base6. Or even base60.

>>33802820
>>33802757
now I want to build a wraithlord with a giant ultramarine blanket

>>33805419
Metric would be better in base 12, clearly, but it's a better system for everyday life than inches, pounds and teaspoons.

>>33805366

>First night, goes to the cheaper tavern, tells the story, makes the perform roll, and as part of his act, brings out the rug. Rolls high, 18-19 IIRC, and it's a resounding success, everyone's happy, and the innkeeper offers to buy the rug (for way more than we'd have been able to get just selling it for the default half of value), and sure, we sell it to him, hangs it on the wall of the tavern.
>Tries again at the second tavern the next night, but this time flubs and rolls a one. Someone had been at the previous night's telling of the story, and drunkenly declares that the performance sucks, and that it needs the proper prop
>Angry, drunken mob spills out, intent on seizing the rug from the other tavern.
>Brawl/riot, between the two taverns patrons, and a fire breaks out.
>More people die during the fracas than the giant bugs ever did.


Oops.

>>33805419
i don't use the Gil much, but that still makes volume
10-2-2-2-4

And I don't use most of the distance ones in between, so it just goes 1-12-3-1760

And most of the smaller and in-between weight ones aren't used, so it goes 1-16-2240

But that just makes giant thousand something numbers you have to remember all the places for.

The only thing that uses base 12 a lot is time, which is a universal one, both metric and imperial, and based on Mesopotamian mathematics.

Literally the only thing imperial in base 12 is feet to inches.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Imperial_units#Length

You're objectively wrong.

>>33804739
Because at the end of the story he tells the moral of it.

It could all be fabricated, I don't care, it's a nice way to end it.

>>33800171
RATTLERATTLE
srsly I can't stop laughing about the bag

>>33804739
It's definitely not a sweet story.
It IS sad, because the DM was taught a pretty bitter lesson about the responsibilities of a DM.

That's the key behind the story. A DM shouldn't abuse his power, especially over such a petty argument.

And you're right. They were both petty, and if the player had simply told him there was no reason behind the toy, everyone would be happy and the tarrasque would never have been destroyed.

But, at the same time, it would never have meant so much to the group.

It's likely completely fake, or at most a heavily skewed story that only tells one facet of a much larger game, but it's still a story that reminds us that we're all human, and not to act like either the player or the DM, but to respect each other and communicate before things get out of hand.

You've taken that lesson to heart already.

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Stop this, you mongoloids ones and all. And post more stories.

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>>33806670

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>>33806693

>>33806693

Y-you can cast ressurrect on animals and familiars, right?

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>>33806842

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>>33806880

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>>33792224

Here's one I drew

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Ballad of Krod

I'm gonna read that once i'm done with my RP, so bumping.

>>33793275
I want to see the aftermath of this.

>>33806866

>A slain familiar can be raised from the dead just as a character can be, and it does not lose a level or a Constitution point when this happy event occurs.

>>33789254
Peach on brudda. Base 12 > Base 10 all day every day.

Has anyone posted the fishermen story?

>>33808652
>>33789171
There it is

I like the demigods one.

>>33787735
I don't cry easily, but this chokes me up every fucking time.
All that effort, all that good intentioned work ruined by some petty fuckup kings.
Everything this sad bastard worked towards turned by a bunch of "divine right" pissants.
Fuck you man, I'm too drunk to be reading this.

>>33789075
>>33789052
>>33788975
I honestly never knew Traveler was like this. I remember hearing it was nothing but math and spreadsheets for spaceships.

>>33812988

You should read the Great Traveller Quintuple Cross.

>>33805203
Are you a hammer? Because you hit the heads of so many nails. I'm glad at least one of you isn't an autistic /r9k/ sperglord or an "emotion is for the weak" edgelord

>>33805468
Now that just sounds like bad luck.

>>33790729
This killed me. I'm now a skeleton

>>33792921
>>33793071
I really want some writefag to do a full novel from this idea. I'd buy the books.

>>33818156
>all dat metagame
DM should've just kicked him out from the start.

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>>33818273

Okay, that one made me feel

Have an oldie

>>33797139
>>33792358
>>33794975
>>33795767
>>33795128
Sure is /v/ in here.

Don't get me wrong, the selfwank of the story is retarded, but you guys are going over the top.

Requesting that story about a chubby happy elf in a grimderp setting who kills the big bad through the power of do-goodiness and disbelief
Or a link to it if it's already been posted.

>>33787504
I don't get the hate on this. Regardless of narrator bias or embellishment, I found it to be an enjoyable story. Sure, it's no epic, but I don't think it's worthy of the tsunami of vitriol that's getting poured over it.

>>33820447
There's no accounting for taste & there's some people that just can't be pleased. Just how it is.

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>>33820447

I think it's the hype backlash, mainly.

There's been quite a while when we thought that thing was the most glorious greentext ever to exist, and now we've all read it.

>>33820447
The hate mostly comes from how much it's been overhyped, and though you might like it, it's a pretty shitty story, the kind of thing /tg/ needs less of, not more.

>>33795920
Please tell me there was some sort of GM and the guy got killed.
Freeform RP without an authority is ALWAYS a bad idea.

>>33788551
i stayed up last night just to read this story. had the best feeling going to bed after.

>>33820509
Please don't say "we."

Unless you've got a midget under your dress, of course.

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>>33820447
It's like all the worst parts of story just got cobbled together.

Barely coherent writing, a paper-thin plot with even thinner characters, and a dependency on LOLSORANDOM for and shred of humor it contains. Add a passive aggressive and charmless protagonist, and we're looking at something a fifteen year old put together during his first time hitting the bottle.

Like yeah, you shouldn't expect much from a /tg/ story, but screaming EPIC or BEAUTIFUL after reading it is basically the equivalent to staring at LHOOQ for fifteen minutes and then shouting FUCKING MASTERPIECE.

>>33821368
the charmless protagonist is the only thing that makes it half way believable

also doing literary analysis on a greentext story makes you a snob

>>33821368
dat (hot) ass though

>>33821529
There's a difference between literary analysis and providing reasons why a bad story is bad.

Sure, I could just say "Shit sucks," but I'm beating the middle-man post asking of why I think it sucks, as if it weren't obvious.

But yeah, shit sucks.
Happy?
Less snobby now?

>>33821529
There's nothing about the story that makes it believable.

>>33821644
still pretty snobby
gb2/lit/

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>>33821893
In that case, I think we need a little more snobbiness in /tg/.

Helps keep out the riff-raff.

>>33822044
I miss the days when /tg/ had bite.

Criticism was the default, not the outlier, to such a degree that no one was shocked when people dismantled everything from characters to systems to campaign ideas in horrible and terrible ways that would crush the hearts of weaker men.

Criticism wasn't taken as an insult, even when it was the rudest, crudest, most straight-up disrespectful language that could be put together. It wasn't an insult because it was simply the culture, a culture that demanded blood and reveled in anger.

Hell, a good critical post often held much more value than what it was criticizing, and that still largely holds true today.

>>33788653
>>33790709
Same author. Check the last post of each.

>>33822230
Good, well thought out criticism holds just as much help as a compliment. I'd rather take criticism, because it shows that people are actually analyzing it and turning it over.

>>33816347
God I hate players like that. That could have been an amazing campaign instead of only a mildly amusing one. Why would he think it was okay to take OOC beliefs and attitudes into an IC setting where there literally was nobody who believed like the player did?

>>33823530


Because many people are incapable of playing a character who isn't just themself transplanted into another world ,and many more are incapable of playing more than one type of character.

I have this one irritant in my group: Every single one of his characters is that tough, gruff, take no crap and mildly psychopathic grey hat from a western. When his characters inevitably get killed (He dies about 4 times as often as anyone else, due to blatantly disregarding hints from PC and NPC alike), the new one might have a different stat sheet, but he sure as fuck won't act any differently.

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>>33787250
Happened earlier today. Not exactly god tier but certainly demonstrates the lack of concentration here.

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>>33823711
Sometimes, I wonder why people bothered to screencap things.

>certainly demonstrates the lack of concentration here.

That's a nice scramble of words that basically add up to you admitting that you don't understand half the things you do, but you do them anyway.

Disappointed.

>>33822230

When was it ?

>>33787523
i snickered

God these threads make /tg/ for me

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hold onto your butts

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>>33787250

>>33827618
I like it. Into the game it goes.

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never forget

requesting the elf boxer who turned into a god story

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Postin the Cheese Necomancer.

Its a Gouda read.

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>>33828434
*inert witty pun about Jarlsburg Cheese here*

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>>33828482

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>>33828512

>>33828434
>>33828482
>>33828512
You've started my midnight cheese cravings again.

To think I'd just finished getting over that...

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>>33828557

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>>33828567
well you chedder get to it then

>>33828693
Can't. I threw the last of the cheese out a few days ago after It all went manky.

>>33828784
Thats sad bro. If i could i would send you a pastrami and Jarlsberg sandwich through th internet.

first i'd need to head to the grocery store and get the Pastrami and Jarlsberg...why don't they sell Jarlsberg cheese here in Texas? I got plenty back when i lived in Jersey

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Good news everyone!

>>33806670
So...he's basically Ciaphas Cain?