>>33481400
Think about how mother is going to be on our ass for this...

Load pistol and wonder if you can fit her in a sewer pipe or a shallow grave in the woods before the police start to ask questions.

>>33481400
Take matters into your own hands. Good for Slick if he pulls through, but have a backup plan ready.

>>33481400
load pistol and prepare a contingency plan if everything goes south

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>>33481592
>>33481524
>>33481561
You reflect on the day you were banned from using guns. It was because of a date.

You're not the manager of prison floor. You don't know the layout or the Committee-mandated escape routes.

>>33481692
Fine then make a shiv out of anything remotely sharp nearby and hid it in your anus in case you need it

>>33481692
Well, there's still the crossbow. Remember, you were banned from guns, and besides which, you didn't even get it registered! That'll teach those obstructive red-tape spreading bureaucrats!

>>33481692
Channel your inner pirate by getting a flintlock pistol

>>33481692
Go Rambo on any fucker who tries to get in your way.

>>33481711
>>33481739
>>33481763
>>33481779
people, people, settle the fuck down.

We need to do this the proper way
the capitalist way

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>>33481711
Melee weapons aren't your forte, even in mmorpgs.

>>33481763
>>33481739
Different date, but same outcome. Also, you're an "obstructive red-tape bureaucrat".

>>33481779
You don't work out thaaaat much.

>>33481811
And what would that be?

>>33481843
Do you have any evidence that could be presented at the trial that might help clear her name?

>>33481843
blackmail the sucker who got you into this shithole situation in the first place

>>33481843
>Also, you're an "obstructive red-tape bureaucrat".

That just means you know all of the tricks and weaknesses they have! Quickly! Escape your office building and find some way to help your date!

Maybe search her apartm- oh, yeah, office for clues.

>>33481843
Hire someone more competent then Slick?

>>33481843
Use your bureaucrat powers to postpone the trial, so you have more time to make a plan.

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>>33481951
Already did. You set up extra-inefficient plans for all the workers and cut off the floor's coffee supply.

>>33481927
As manager, you have the master key. But it still feels wrong.

>>33481843
Use your bureau-telepathy to force the trial to happen two days after the date, citing a day of celebration of a true hero of capitalism.

>>33481998
Go in anyway and search her stuff thoroughly. And I mean THOROUGHLY

>>33481998
Would you rather she stand in front of a judge?

Plus, you can check out what her place is like, and maybe get an idea of what she likes in her men...

>>33482033
Panty drawer too?

>>33482088
of course... but if anyone asks you didn't

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>>33482018
You put the idea of such a letter on your to-do list.

>>33482070
>>33482033


>>33482070
>>33482033
Oh man, what wold your mother think?

You step past your splintered door and enter 606's office. It's filled with posters of obscure movies and video games - is that Donnie Darko? Wow.

>>33482124
Search her closet first.

>>33482124
SNIFF HER BEDSHEETS

Er... look behind her posters (carefully) for things hidden behind it, then check that 606 jumpsuit for anything in her pockets.

THEN SNIFF HER BEDSHEETS

>>33482124
>>33482194
>>33482179
Once you're done with those go through her drawers and desk searching for false bottoms.. and who knows maybe she won't miss a pair of panties or two..

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>>33482236
>>33482194
>>33482179
These thoughts all tell you that it's time to search elsewhere.

>>33482274
since you've found nothing here you might as well tear the place apart making it look like a robber got in

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>>33482295
What? Robber? What a strange thought to have as you scale up a bazillion-story building.

You're Hans. Fascist freedom fighter. Using the power of almighty Hitler's blessings and nanofibers, you have climbed up to someone's window.

You forgot the rest of the plan. It's kind of embarrassing.

>>33482377
continue climbing until you can find a way into said bazillion-story building

>>33482377
Radio back to base, and ask what you have to do again.

>>33482377
Be a Nazi.

Check your inventory

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>>33482461
"Um, base?" you ask timidly.
"Yes, Hans?"
"What am I doing here, again?"
"Dummkopf, to free our brothers in the wrong chains!"
"Wait, someone got captured?"
"Well, are agents keep getting captured. We don't really keep track of them, but we still gotta check if they're okay. So we have a weekly prison break thing going on. You know, Fascist Friday?"
Fucking Fascist Friday.

>>33482489
Listen, you're not a nazi, you're a fascist. You personally don't have anything against Jews or non-aryans at all. It's just that your dad pushed you into it, and now you're here.

>>33482503
Nano-fiber stick gloves and a stun gun.

>>33482456
You find an office.

There's a mattress and posters of obscure movies and video games - is that Donnie Darko? No way.

>>33482528
But you are affiliated with the Nazi Party, aren't you?

Anyways, climb in and figure out who lives here. They might have some clothes that will fit us!

>>33482528
Lay on the bed. Take a breather.

Trade your uniform for some red, you need to look proper when you beat down some CLUWNES

>>33482528
Look through the closet.

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>>33482581
Listen here, you're a fascist who believes that a strong government is better than none at all. Nothing racist or homophobic, despite what your father is.

>>33482616
Seems... antifascist.

>>33482677
>>33482672
You find matching uniforms. Unfortunately, they were designed for a creature with a smaller waist and boobs. You pocket it anyways.

>>33482757
Find a map of the building.

>>33482757
Feel compelled to wear the uniform.

>>33482796
seconded

>>33482757
Find a shirt with a happy face on it.

Also, make a note next time to bring in a gas mask, toolbelt, and a emag, you sad excuse of a facist infiltrator

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>>33482847
You're just a rookie, you didn't know.

>>33482796
>>33482837
You couldn't wear it, really, but you do have this one friend who likes to try on new -

"Hans! Help me in! There's a drone patrolling in the air."

Speak of the devil.

>>33482909
push the creeper out of the window

>>33482909
taze him, he's probably already spotted

>>33482909
Drag him in, close the window, and hide in the corners. Don't leave any sign of your presence.

>>33482909
Pull him in

>>33482909
He's going to get the both of you caught! Quickly, drag his fat hairy ass in!

Also, don't show him the uniform, we don't want to see the fascist version of capitalist Man-Faye.

Ever.

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>>33483018
>>33483028
>>33483038
You help him in and shut the window. The glass fades to a dark black.

He then takes the uniform from you.

"Oh, oh, my gott! Hans, you little sneak! Really, how did you- no don't even, thanks! I really needed a stylish Prelestny Fashion shirt!"

He puts it on.

"You're the best, Hans!"

>>33483094
Now punch him in the throat and run away

>>33483094
Eh? It seems like he's caught your interest. That's not against any fascist principles, is it?

That aside, let's investigate this room to see who's been living in it.

>>33483094
Exit the building. Find the jail.

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>>33483145
Maybe against Nazism, but not fascism. Equality under oppression.

You find some weird scrapbook, and give it to your companion, Karl.

>>33483164
"Come on, Hans, we're wasting freedom time." He pushes you to the elevator and presses the JAIL LEVEL button.

You're lucky that no one saw you yet.

>>33483212
Someone might be waiting when you come out of the elevator. Hide on the ceiling.

>>33483212
Make fascist small talk.

>>33483212
See if you can find a hatch to the roof of the elevator car, climb up on top of it, and see if you can sneak to the jail floor by pressing the floor after the jail floor and opening the elevator doors when it stops.

tell hem he looks good

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>>33483276
It's a bit too short for that.

>>33483337
You - what? Seems rather complicated for just sneaking into a high-security ultra-rich corporate fashion building.

>>33483347
No, no, he's married to a woman. That'd be cheating on his wife.

>>33483309
"So, Karl, how about politics? Pretty crazy, that Mixed Economic Republic of Denmark. Holding out between two superstates," you say.
"Hey Hans, can I tell you something?" Karl asks.
"Jesus, that serious. Can't it wait?"
"I - no. It can't. I've been hiding it from my parents, from my friends, and my children. I have to come out of the closet, I think."

Oh mein gott.

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>>33483366
"I think I'm a communist."

>>33483366
Tell him to get a hold of himself. And slap him super hard.

see I tall you! Tall him its ok.

>>33483430
Have you told your wife yet? She should know that you've been lying about your socio-political affiliations. It's hurting your marriage, and the longer you hide it, the worse it'll get.

>>33483430
I can understand being displeased with the government's ideology, but we've got to focus on the mission. Whatever form of government ultimately succeeds, we need to undermine the cruel and oppressive regimes so that better civilizations can take their place.

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>>33483563
>>33483531
(Apologies for the confusion and accidental writing of "607" on a "606" uniform)
You didn't say it! You're a Fascist! An ambiguously gay fascist who's infiltrating a prison!

Fucking Karl here is the one who's jeopardizing everything now, the commie.

As you move to choke him, the elevator doors open.

"Welcome to prison floor! Smile for the automatic photo!" beeps out a camera.

>>33483430
"Don't worry, I understand how you... wait, I thought you were going to say something else."

>>33483602
Don't kill him just because of his ideology. Focus on the big problems. This nation uses forced child labor to accumulate wealth. Political differences can be worked out later.

>>33483602
take out your tazer.
It's time to paint the halls

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>>33483656
>>33483692
You struggle with your thoughts when two guards yell, "FREEZE!"

One of them is in bellbottom jeans.

Wait, what are you thinking, you're about to get shot.

>>33483752
Ask him what happened to his pants.

Not the one with the jeans, the other one. Doesn't he know that bell bottoms are in this season?

>>33483752
Throw down a smoke bomb!

>>33483752
Point the jeans out to Karl, have him go into a fashion frenzy and remove those jeans by force.

>>33483752
Close the elevator

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>>33483777
Yeah, you're right. What an un-trendy motherfucker.

>>33483856
All of a sudden, saucy Cuban Salsa starts playing over the radio. Even the guards are distracted. It's a solid beat.

>>33483809
You and Karl zap the two guards unconscious as you throw down a smoke bomb.

>>33483927
Snag their keys. We gotta release all these freedom fighters and maybe violent criminals.

>>33483927
Walk out to the tune like some saucy show host

>>33483927
Get their uniform. We need endure this...jeans if we want get into prison undetected.

>>33483927
Snag the unconscious guards and grab their uniforms and guns. Prop them up in a compromising position in the elevator, one guy having his butt being used as a pillow by the other guy.

>>33483927
Where do the cameras send data? You might want to delete your pictures from their records.

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>>33483955
>>33483952
You saucily put on the jeans.

>>33483949
You find a plastic button on the bell-bottom guard. You press it. It does nothing, you think.

>>33483980
Disappointed, you start to amuse yourself.

>>33483999
Hmm, yeah. Wouldn't want anyone thinking some dude named 606 wasn't who they thought it was. That'd be overly mean to a complete stranger.

Then a deafening boom behind you.

"INTRUDERS DETECTED: PROFIT INEVITABLE."

Holy shit, it's a giant robot.

>>33484063
Why did you press the button? Pressing buttons that you can't identify is always a bad idea.

>>33484063
Oh shit, runrunrunRUN!!!

>>33484063
Back to the elevator.

>>33484063
Climb the walls like you did outside the building.
Swipe the shirt from the ceiling.

Also, your smoke grenade is shoddy, what kind of fascist armory did you buy that from?

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>>33484178
It appears that the shirt directs it, somehow. It momentarily flips into an angry face when IT SHOOTS AT YOU.

>>33484143
FULL OF PEOPLE IN COMPROMISING POSES.

>>33484136
You run. You hear the gun Karl picked up say, "No Prelestny Fashion shirt detected on user. Access denied."

>>33484255
Tell the shirt that you'll find it someone more comfortable to wear it if it lets you go.

>>33484255
Haul ass. Really hard.

>>33484276
You look over to Karl.

"WHY DID YOU TAKE OFF THE SHIRT YOU TOOK FROM ME?" you yell.
"It was un-stylish five minutes ago," he responds.

>>33484286
You keep running.

>>33484276
Grab a shirt from one of the guards

>>33484303
Run in zig-zags. It won't be able to target you.

>>33484343
>>33484303
*serpentine

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>>33484372
"UN-STYLISH?"
"Yeah, I have an app on my visor that tells me the latest trends."

>>33484424
Sweet! We need one!

>>33484424
What else does your visor do?

>>33484424
Well, that's not very fascist of him, is it? People should conform the the vision of their enlightened leaders, not to the chaotic whims of the masses!

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>>33484445
You ask him as a bullet goes through your hat.
"Teleportation!" he chimes.

>>33484467
Damn straight - wait, did this motherfucker say teleportation?

>>33484565
Ask why you had to scale up an entire building when he had that the whole time. Also escape.

>>33484565
press all the buttons on the way out.
Buttons are your friend.

>>33484565
He's pressing a button. Grab his hand so he doesn't leave you behind.

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>>33484584
You tell him how needlessly difficult the beginning of the mission was. Also, teleportation.
"Shit, I thought you knew where you were going," he says.

He grabs your shoulder and presses his visor.

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Teleportation is a lot like an acid trip. For one moment, you feel like you're one with the universe. It sounds like a Pink Floyd album. It tastes like love.

Karl transforms into a one-eyed mutant. You grow wings out of your cheeks and turn blue.

And then it's over. Safe and sound. Drooling.

PART 8 OVER, GO HOME, PEOPLE.

>>33484814
THANKS FOR THE THREAD

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>>33484960
I LOVE YOU TOO.

Just got here. I feel like we were supposed to break 203 and 606 out of prison, and failed spectacularly.

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>>33485042
I expect that the picture of "606" with the scrapbook and nazi uniform will be enough to convince the cold, uncaring bureaucracy of Prelestny Fashion. All except Slick, 203, Kaguya, and the manager.

WHOOPS SPOILER NOT REALLY

Thanks for checking out the quest, though!

>>33485099
Thread tomorrow?

>>33485118
I'm out of pumpkin man pictures.

I'll aim for it, but no guarantee. It's really weird and cool to see people expecting more and not hate it.

Goodnight.