You stare at your radioman. Not in the eyes, but at his now mostly-bare scalp. "It looks good right?" Patrick says, grinning as he runs a hand back through the three-inch strip of hair running from his forehead over the top of his head. "I saw soldiers wearing it in an old picture!"You are Commander Russells of the M26E1 Pershing Heavy Tank and Patrick has a mohawk.Its been two weeks since Erika was defeated- and there's been a huge effect on team morale. For the first time the entire team knows they can win this. And now your radioman has a mohawk. If you weren't familiar with his normal hair color, it would almost look like he'd dyed it.>"Why?">"It's... uh... Aggressive.">"Nope.">Other.
>>33479645>>"Why?"Has he at least ditched the pubebeard?
>>33479645>"Why?"No, seriously. Did Anzu somehow manage to get him to go through with this?Because that's the only sensible reason I have.
>>33479645>>"Why?">Other.Apply Palm directly to forehead. Or pinch your nosebridge.
>>33479738This. >obligatory posting of link to old threads: http://pastebin.com/pifB1Vq0
>>33479645>Other."You won't be able to pull off a full beard with it very well, trim down to a goatee and you'll be good."
>>33479645>>"It's... uh... Aggressive."
>>33479645+1 >>33479738>>33479717Patrick, making sense>laughing girls.gif
>>33479645>"It's... uh... Aggressive."Aggressive radioman. That's like a pug with a spiked collar. Still dopey.
>>33480112This is a whole other degree of laziness.Let me help you with that.
>>33479645>Other.Ok then, Patrick. It's your head. And this is the least disturbing thing you've done in Japan, so OK. But I gotta know, did anyone suggest you do this, or anything like this?Also, pic related.
>>33479645>>33479738Where's the Tactical Face-Palm pic when you need it?
>>33479645>>"Why?">Other.face, meet palm.
BLACJACK IS KILL!?
>>33481083FLAPJACK IS GRILL!?
>>33481126APPLEJACK IS CHILL!?
>>33481199<insert pony joke><insert brony insult><insert Extra Bull Shit> (optional)and go
>>33481306He *could* be referring to the cider. Maybe.
>>33481199COGNAC IS SWILL!?
You take a deep breath before sighing as you rub the bridge of your nose. You aren't exactly surprised- this kind of thing is sort of par the course for your radioman. You love the guy like a brother, but you're left with a single question echoing through your mind. "Why?""To stand out!" He says with a grin. "Saw the pictures in a book- thought it would look good. We're rebels man! Outsiders! Gaijin!" He laughs. "I'm embracing it, man! We're the invasion!"You blink at him.>Just walk away.>That's not a bad idea, actually...>Other.
>>33481435>Just walk away.It seriously took you over an hour to write that?
>>33481435>Other."At least ditch the beard. It clashes."
>>33481435>Other.Point out that he already "stood out."Or did he repress that memory of the Anglerfish Dance?
>>33481456Had to go get dinner- that took most of the time. :/Good news is that the curry chicken was amazingly good.
>>33481435>Nip this in the bud.As crew commander, we are responsible for him. this could sink every bit of cred we got with the Kuro match.
>>33481502why would we do this, it's a historically-accurate haircut that the 1st airborne used during WWII, that said...>>33481435>>33481471>>33481462both of these.
>>33481435>>Other."Don't back and cry in my lap when you regret this."
>>33481528while we're tankers, not dumb grunts, *ducks behind desk*, your vote makes sense. changing mine to >>33481462, >>33481471.
>>33481591Remember, we're also not 'tankers', really, we're 14-16 year old boys, we do weird shit.
On the other hand, Patrick's airheaded routine might just land him a certain Anzio girl.
>>33481686point taken, even though my 'weird thing' was a lack of rebellion. I've read too much about the 60's and 70's to really step into that mindset.
>>33481725i fear for their children though....
>>33481725Patrick's with Anzu. he's smart enough to know not to cheat on her. >>33481748you and me both.
>>33481759>Patrick's with Anzu. he's smart enough to know not to cheat on her. Dear god, how horrifying.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JXZcfw8sqiI vroom vroom.
>>33481797what? did you miss Anzu's mentioning that she liked Patrick since she was like her: a professional troll? or is it the though of what Anzu would do to someone who would take advantage of her feelings?>>33481838vroom indeed.
>>33481917No no, just the idea of them shacking up basically short circuits my brain and makes smoke come out of my ears.
>>33481945two master trolls uniting their strengths? well, the sex'll never get stale with those two, that's for sure.
>>33481591>>33481528I was wrong, its from the 101st, not the 1st airborne division.
>>33482035... is Patrick gonna try to jump out of a plane next?That would make some sense for him, considering his line of thinking.
You shake your head. "Was it really necessary to stand out anymore than you already did at the parade?" You say as you turn and walk off. "At least shave the beard- it looks like crap.""With the mohawk or just in general?" He asks."Yes." You reply simply. You need distraction now- something that actually needs to be dealt with. For example, Anzio. You know that Anchovy, their team's Duce favors plans in order to make up for their incredibly weak armor and weaponry. That being said their tankettes are tiny and mobile.>Find Anzu- Discuss finances.>Yukari- she'll know their tanks.>Other.
>>33482601>Yukari- she'll know their tanks.
>>33482601>Yukari- she'll know their tanks.Solid Snake time when?
>>33482601>Yukari- she'll know their tanks.You have another mission, should you choose to accept it.Also, out of all of Yukari's spy missions, it's only during her infiltration with Saunders that she's marked out.An unexpected nod towards Allied counter-intelligence perhaps?
>>33482601>>Yukari- she'll know their tanks.Well, if we lucky we'll caught our Fluffy Snake preparing her gear.And maybe we can join too. I heard Italian food is very delicious...
>>33482601>>Yukari- she'll know their tanks.Must have fluffy.
Rolled 11 + 9>>33482601>>Yukari- she'll know their tanks.Fluffy~
>>33482678Well, it was her first trip, and she did make the mistake of openly asking questions...
>>33482752Her second trip wasn't that subtile either. I get the feeling that the Anzio girls are easily distracted.
>>33483843FUCK!fuckfuckfuck.Right then. Coffee. Coffee and shame. But first, I shall commit Sayaku.
>>33483788Yea, Yukari was paying them in cash and those Anzio girls are so poor, they wouldn't care what questions was asked.
It isn't hard to find Yukari- "Yukari!" You shout- she's up on top of the Panzer IV's turret, attaching chains and cables while they prepare to lift it off to check the hydraulic motor that powers the turret."Hi Russells!" She says, hooking a chain into a lifting eye before sliding down and onto the hull to take a seat. "What's up?" She idly kicks her legs back against the side of the tank."So, we're going against Anzio..." You begin."Oh I know! Italian tanks! It'll be a chicken shoot!" She says excitedly. "It'll be nice having the upper hand for once!"You blink a couple times. "Turkey shoot- and I don't think we should underestimate them..." You start to say again."Psh, they beat Maginot- that's not that hard-" She says dismissively. "They use the same tanks and the same formations and the same strategy every battle- I'm not surprised Anzio figured out a way around them..." >"Well I heard they've got a secret weapon for us...">"Well maybe they'll have a plan for us too?">"What do you know about their tanks?">Other.
>>33483788I think the OVA established pretty well that Anchovy and Carpaccio are the only non-idiots on the team. Also, Kei was completely oblivious to Yukari being a spy, Naomi was the one who caught her.
>Yukari is canon in lesbians for Miho>No amount of work can contain the fluffy
>>33483935>Yukari in a tuxEvery time
>>33483920>"Well maybe they'll have a plan for us too?"
>>33483920>>"Well I heard they've got a secret weapon for us...">>"Well maybe they'll have a plan for us too?">>"What do you know about their tanks?"as if there was any other choice
>>33483920>"Well I heard they've got a secret weapon for us...">"Well maybe they'll have a plan for us too?">Other. "think you can pull off another infiltration mission?"Going off for a bit, lets get to the point people.
>>33483920>>"Well I heard they've got a secret weapon for us..."
>>33483920>"Well I heard they've got a secret weapon for us..."We must be the voice of sanity. We will not blow off a school simply because they're historically lame.>>33483911I feel bad for them, and yet am strangly confused about the economics of a "poor" schoolship.>>33483924Kei is the blonde cheerleader ideal; good at what she does and clueless everywhere else.If we follow the logic of Fluffy Spy, going to Saunders, get directions to meeting, then ask question at meeting did ok. Going to Anzio, and just asking around did quite well.Sneaking works against her. Against Black Forest she should just walk up to Erika and ask for the plans.
>>33484065last time we agreed that the senshado program is underfunded, the ship itself is doing rather well as a traveling Italy tourist destination.>>33484065and what happens when Erika reports her to Shiho?
>>33484065>I feel bad for them, and yet am strangly confused about the economics of a "poor" schoolship.Ooarai is relatively poor and the principal owns...er, owned a Ferrari F40.
>>33484119Shiho slaps the crap out of Erika for giving up the plans to a Fluffy Spy.>>33484122This explains why Oorai is poor.>>33484119Now that you mention that, it causes me to re-examine tidbits from the OVA. Anchovy mentioned they were paying for Senshado by cutting back on snacks. The lunch program looks like a festival to Fluffy.They live for food. Absurd quantities of food. And they're not hambeasts.This can mean only one thing...Anzio is populated by Hobbits.
>>33484205You misunderstand. You think Shiho won't hold Yukari hostage, have her arrested for trespassing, or just using the occasion to show how dishonorable we are and make herself the hero in all this? She will do all this and more. Yukari going to Black Forest Peak is a Game-Over Scenario.
>>33484292Which, fortunately, she didn't end up doing. Besides, Miho's already familiar with their motorpool and tactics.
The only realistic way Yukari can successfuly infiltrate Black Forest Peak is by cutting that fully so nobody recognize her.And we are not THAT desperate.
>>33484355exactly. No Solid Snake Shenanigans for us.Blood Raven Gifts on the other hand...
>>33484394I agree. Never shall the beloved foof be shorn!
>>33484396"Eh, nee-san. I need some new tank. could you help me?""Sure Miho. Its happen we have extra Panther here. I'll get it delivered, but Keep it secret from mom or Erika, alright? "
>>33483920>>"Well I heard they've got a secret weapon for us...""And I learn anything tagged with "secret weapon" is worth worrying for, until proven otherwise."
>>33484431"Maho, why is that Panther driving circles around my Tiger? Its even outpacing the damm Excelsior!""I do not know Erika, perhaps this is another prototype of theirs. give chase and destroy it.""Now Miho, show your dear sister how you use your gifts."
>>33483920>>33483966Solid Snake Time Is Now!
>>33484598well, the Germans *were* working on a gas turbine...
>>33484690I'm pretty sure he means the Turbo Panther, with the turbine, kerosene-fueled engine we found.
>>33484598All I can hear is the Benny Hill theme song.
>>33484598And in place of Tiger P, its Blackjack that hold the line so Miho can do 'sisterly' talk with Maho."Its rude to interrupt sisterly talk, no? I afraid you must passed our carcass first."
>>33484736Yep.>>33484748The Tiger P would still be better for that, it's bigger than we are and better-armored, IIRC. Perfect roadblock.
>>33484748You read my mind.>>33484770why one road block the enemy can cross over when we can par behind the Tiger (P), blast the first tank to crawl over, and seal the entrance completely? then the final engagement is 2 on one.>>33484738Video Game girls will need training from volleyball team, but yes.
>>33484804We could also hang off to the side and sidefuck the black forest tanks while they're focused on the tiger p roadblock.Of course this conversation is based on hella assumptions as to how the final fight is going to go so
>>33484804Good point.>>33484819Aye, and remember, assuming makes an ass out of u and me ;)
>>33484819Well, I hope at least BJ retain Maho vs Miho showdown. It sisterly love at best.....btw, don't Saunders have that T95? Now they already out from tourney, they wouldn't mind if we 'borrow' them for final....And Katyusha, that such a cool IS-2! Such a big commander like you wouldn't mind if we borrow it for a while. ye?
>>33484819seeing the enemy lower armor from the front alone vs. side armor with the possibility of being flanked? Pardon me if I'll skip.>>33484819>>33484833I agree, this just alot of assuming. but if we get into that situation, we know what to do. and if it never comes up, it'll be a fun mental exercise to picture.
>>33484867A very small part of me regrets not saving ourselves for the Nonon. Oh well, we'll probably get a side fic at least
"Well, they're claiming they've got a secret weapon for us..." You say, leaning up against the Panzer IV. "That worries me- And I don't know anything about Italian tanks..." You trail off."So you need me to fill in the blanks?" She asks. "I could do some research- my knowledge is a bit out of date anyway." She says with a quick salute, before putting a finger up to her chin. "Or I could go do some more recon..." She says, grinning at you. "It worked pretty well last time!""What, you mean sneak onto their ship again?" You ask. You're not entirely enthusiastic about these kinds of plans, but Yukari did do a pretty good job last time and got some pretty critical information for the fight against Saunders.She nods. "Could go tomorrow- it's a Friday!">"No- it's too dangerous to keep doing that.">"Alright, make it happen...">"You're going to need help...">Other.
>>33484867Us getting the T95 has been my wet dream for this quest since the start. If we ask, Kay'll probably say yes if we do a favor in return. Red Vanya is doubtful though.>>33484900Kill la kill quest is the other way amigo.
>>33484804I'm hoping Nekonya gets more screentime before the next match.
>>33484928>"You're going to need help..."its dangerous to go alone, take this.>>33484944OVA says yes.
>>33484928>"Alright, make it happen..."
>>33484928>>"You're going to need help...""Lets talk it with Anzu, she may have something that could help you"
>>33484955Ah, that I understand my friend. I too, follow the Nonna.
>>33484928>OtherIf mighty QM does not want to do another Yukari Quest, then NO.Otherwise>"You're going to need help..."Fluffy shenanigans HO!>>33484944I too would like to spend more time with mai waifu.
>>33484985At least some good old cold war honor-fucking, ya know?
>>33484928>>"You're going to need help..."Field trip is go! Anchovy falls in love at first sight, and Miho's possessive streak comes out in an ugly way during the match
>>33485008...or we can get Gamp and Granny Reizei to Anzio and tell them its a 'honeymoon' gift. When Anzio girls distracted with them, Yukari could do her recon duty more easily.
>>33485029Gramps! I need you to snog Granny Reizei on Anzio as a distraction! What do you mean why?Because Fluffy is terrible at stealth!
>>33485068DISTRACTION GRAMPS!EVERYBODY SHOOT HIM!
>>33484928>"No- it's too dangerous to keep doing that."Hit the books.
>>33485003yeah, I know. Right now, I think Nonna'll be our third in a love rivalry triangle. Erika is personal rival, Nonna is historical rival we are semi-friends with and fight as often as we can.
>>33484770>and better-armored, Only if it's the Panzerbehfelswagen Tiger (P) that saw service with the Schwerepanzerjägers - by virtue of having the same 100mm of appliqé armour as the Elefant/Ferdinand TDs.All the other Tiger (P)s (that didn't see action) have essentially the same armour values as a regular Tiger IE, and as such less than the Pershing; at least frontally.
>>33485221Oh? I see. The more you know.
>>33484928Secret agent Yukari, reporting!>>33484958>>33484984
You sigh. "Well, if you want to go sneaking around another school you're going to need help." You say- Yukari seems to light up. "You'll need a partner- hell even a team!" You smile- this should be an interesting change of pace.Yukari nods enthusiastically. "Yes! One team can be the distraction while I get more information!" She looks around. "Have you ever done an Op before?" She says quickly, looking around."An Op?" You ask, blinking a couple of time."Well lucky you've got me around- I'll show you everything you'll need!" She pulls a notebook out from... You don't know actually. "We'll need rope and grappling hooks, this time. WiFi cameras...">"Yukari, why don't Miho and I just act like tourists?">"I don't think we need to be that complicated...">"On second thought- What about someone else?">Other.
>>33485898>>"On second thought- What about someone else?"
>>33485898>>"Yukari, why don't Miho and I just act like tourists?""in worst case, they recognize Miho and put all of their attention on her, so you can move more freely"
>>33485898>"Yukari, why don't Miho and I just act like tourists?"eh, what's the worst that could happen?
>>33485951WHAT COULD POSSIBLY GO WRONG
>>33485898>"Yukari, why don't Miho and I just act like tourists?"
>>33485898>OtherYou're not thinking big enough. You want a distraction, we'll show them a REAL distraction.
>>33486068Like dressed as Roman Legionnaire?
>>33485951>>33485942Do psuedo-italians watch TG?
>>33486043I have been reading the Kill la Kill Quests in the archives. there have been FAR fewer red buttons here and our comrades are not the kind of people who immediately start humping the button at its mere sight. have faith, the Emperor protects.
>>33486099>>"Yukari, why don't Miho and I just act like tourists?">>33486043 That said, I fully support this option.
>>33486098Whats TG?and oh >>33486097is me, i want too if we want more bang, dress like Caesar's Legion.
>>33486098Hilarious meta, but no, everyone in senshado, hell in JAPAN knows our faces. >>33486097>>33486129No, we are nor Rory.
>>33486145*knows our faces after the Erika match. Can you tell I've had little sleep?
>>33486147I thought >>33486098 meant this board, hence meta. God. I am tired.
>>33486145The Anzio team is not exactly enthusiastic about Senshado. Yes they like it but food and partying is their priority.
>>33486145not Roman you mean?>>33486183Maybe some coffee can help a bit.inb4 you already have three mugs.
>>33486097Nah. Go to a Restaurant that has the diners dress in Togas.TOGA DATE
>>33486194We made International news. If we're not being hounded by reporters, fans, detractors, I.E. the full celebrity treatment, I will be disappoint.>>334862141. you missed a Dr. Who reference, turn in your nerd card, then google Rory Williams. 2. coffee never tasted right to me. caffeine from flavored energy drinks, that's fine.
>>33486272Dr. Who is not premiered here, i afraid. Such live on SEA.
>>33486272Anzio team didn't even care they got a new tank, they went for the food first. They partied so hard they missed Ooarai vs Kuromorimine.
>>33486291My utmost apologies, sir. Here, take My nerd card. I can get a new one by the end of the week. Do you want me to explain the reference or would you rather look it up?
>>33485951Just remember- you're the one who asked it.
>>33486315Some explanation may needed here. From initial search i found he is the Doctor companion, and i've found anything significant yet.
>>33486352I think I just created a Pushed Red Button. There is only one reaction to this change of events.
>>33486400*note, skipping major plot events not immediately related to joke* Rory was, at one point, erased from existence and everyone's memory except the doctor. Rory is later found living as a *auton* Roman soldier, and is re-integrated into the time-stream through sheer will and love for Amy. 'The Centurion' becomes a in-joke for the guy. And that's why going around as a Roman Soldier is going to get you Dr. Who jokes.
>>33486415>Three days later... Miho and Russells are being chased by a crowd of hundreds of angry Anzio students to the edge of the carrier. They look at each other and jump...
"You're overcomplicating it..." You say, interrupting her planning. "Me and Miho will just pose as tourists- I definately fit the bill for that." You haul yourself up on the side of the tank. "Besides- we need another date and if we can do that and cover your mission we're killing two birds with one stone...""They make great Italian food! I went there once with my parents!" Yukari says. "While you guys distract them then I can get into their hangers and see what they've got!" You pounds a fist into her hand. "Just make sure you guys keep them occupied."It occurs to you, as Yukari continues making a list of things she'll need, that maybe Miho should know about the plan at some point before it happens. >Get Miho in on the plan.>Let her know its a date- she doesn't need to know what Yukari's doing.>Other.
>>33486550>>Get Miho in on the plan.let her know.
>>33486489whelp.>>33486550>Get Miho in on the plan.
>>33486550>Get Miho in on the plan.
>>33486550>Get Miho in on the plan.Let her know, let her know~
>>33486599Can't hide things anymore~
>>33486550>Get Miho in on the plan.That would probably be a good idea, yes.
>>33486550>>Get Miho in on the plan.Miho works better with Data
>>33486550BJ is dead, Red button crisis averted.
You leave Yukari to her planning- which she is already working on with gusto. You need to find Miho and make sure she's alright with helping you cover for Yukari's potentially morally ambiguous espionage mission."Hey, Miho!" You say, finding her with the Public Morals Committee. She smiles as you approach. "So, uh... You want to go get some dinner tomorrow?" You push your foot around on the ground and lower your voice a bit. "...Over on Anzio's carrier?"Nozomi perks up. "Off-ship dates are against regulations!" The two of you just stare at her and she blushes before backing off a bit at which point Miho looks at you and sighs."Yukari's going spying again, isn't she?" She guess and you gulp."Yeah, maybe a bit of looking around?" You admit. "But we're just going to be having a good time being a distraction!" You defends. "It'll be fun and the odds are against two dates in a row going spectacularly wrong.""B-but Espionage is DEFINATELY against regulations..." Pazomi says quietly- getting another set of stares from you and Miho. Screw regulations- you've got a tank.Miho sighs. "Fine- but if anything goes wrong we're getting Yukari and we're getting out of there."
NEXT TIME ON GIRLS UND PANZER!>We get called.>We spies now.>What could possibly go wrong?Girls und Panzer Quest will return on Tuesday at 4-5PM PST!Follow me on Twitter for schedule updates and to find out when the thread goes live!https://twitter.com/BlackJackGuPQ
>>33487038ON GARUPAN: THE SPY WHO FLUFF MEand we need helicopter for emergency bailout now.
>>33487038ON DATE BLUEBALL Z
>>33487045>inb4 Black FA223 Down
>Distraction date plan is a goI wonder if Anzio, in trying to emulate the full Italian package, has one of those Venetian gondola rides?Russells can do both the rowing and the singing.