You are shax Gloombreaker, average carnival going goblin girl! On a whim you decided to go see a circus since you've never seen one before, and it has always been a dream of yours to go. You weren't sure if the circus workers would give you a show so you captured the whole caravan so they couldn't run away, and now you get to enjoy the sights and sounds! Even if the workers are all worried you're going to kill their entire family and then them. It is okay, you wouldn't do something like that as long as they let you see the elephants.You have:>14/56 BtB exp>22/56 MSiF exp>7/56 CyRCTHaM exp>One Divine Duty away from more Sea Mom Stuff>Shax's Stuff! So you can keep track: http://pastebin.com/U3hKZfAd>Shax Company!: http://pastebin.com/mZgVD5yH>I'm the boss! Points: 0>Pearls: 8You give your goldfish, Shining Victory, to Bearbreath to take care of while you run around everywhere. You've seen him talk to animals before, but he swears goldfish don't have anything interesting to say. You made him promise to tell Shining Victory your name, though. He was pretty easy to find, just hanging out in the menagerie."Do you wanna bust these animals open? Isn't them being caged up against druid code or something?" Bearbreath glances at you as you suggest this."Hmmm? No, I don't particularly care. These things are all pretty happy, so far as I can tell." But doesn't it need to natural or something? Even if they die in a week or two it is all survival of the fittest or whatever? You think? You're not good at being a druid. Elephants were less cute than you imagined when you were told they had big floppy ears, a weird nose, and a goofy grin. Only slightly disappointing! Lions are amazing, though. The handler said to please not get too close to it, but you really wanna pet it's mane. Where to?>Three ring Big Top Performance!>Sideshow>Go see the families and ask them how carnival life is
>>33231300PET THAT MANE!>Three ring Big Top Performance!Also ask who named it. That's a stupid name. I am sure someone stupid named it.
>>33231300>Three ring Big Top Performance!
M-Main Event already??The night has just begun!Give me a d20 to show how much heart the performers put into it.
>>33231300>Three ring Big Top Performance!I know we could probably recruit people if we pick "families" but this is too tempting.
Rolled 1>>33231504You just want to roll dice, huh?
Rolled 6>>33231504Better be a lot of heart for the sake of their families
Rolled 5>>33231504All the heart, nothing less!
Rolled 18>>33231504They better put all their heart. Or Shax will eat their hearts. (She won't but let them think she will)
>>33231548>>33231549>>33231554Too terrified to perform, I guess.
>>33231548I sure am sad about those performers.
>>33231548You can see why, can't you?
>>33231548We're not even rolling for Shax this time!
>>33231548That's what I like to see
>>33231548It's like they want their families killed!
>>33231548Starting off strong today I see.
>>33231582Jinx is shitty ADCCait is better any day
>>33231548Oh man. These people just want to see this circus burn.
>>33231649But we champion a sea goddess.The sea doesn't burn.
>>33231673We're also a light demi-god. Pretty sure lazers set things on fire.
>>33231714No, they make things bright.Get it right, stupid!
>>33231742Fire makes things bright, too! Dummy!
>>33231767But we aren't a fire demigod. We're a light demigod.Those are two totally different and unrelated things!
>>33231548And so begins this threads streak of terrible rolls. Just wouldn't be OWQ without it.
>>33231839>>33231767Obviously Shax is > fire because fire wouldn't be fire without light. QED.
>>33231839It's called a sub-domain. Or a associative power.
>>33231872> dat logicI like this fellow, can we keep him?
You kick your feet for a bit, eating some sort of 'corndog' which you're reasonably sure isn't made of corn OR dogs, and chatting with Bearbreath for a bit about the animals in front of you. You sorta lose track of time, and when the sun starts to set you realize you haven't seen the main event yet!"Ah! Hey, you!" The animal handler seizes up and nervously glances in your direction when you address him, "When's the big show! I wanna see it now."He gives you a mortified look before responding, "Oh, I, uh. I will go ahead and let the Ringmaster know, then." He scurries off quickly. You glance at Bearbreath, he shrugs. A few moments later the Ringmaster walks up to you."I'd like to personally invite you to the VIP seating for our performance this night." You don't know what VIP means, but you agree to it. The man with a top hat leads you into the giant tent, and you see most of the boys have been seated already. Allonces is actually draped across Alfonse's lap on front row, and she's treating him like some sorta giant recliner. When you sit down, a person hands you a bag of yellow fluffy looking stuff.To your surprise, however, it was not fluffy at all. But crunchy! And it had small things that stuck in your teeth. But, for some reason, as you watched the performers you kinda forgot you were eating it even as you shoved more in your face.First up were four guys introduced as the swiftest hands in the southwest. They were tossing some objects between each other in a rhythmic fashion, hands a blur. It was kinda cool! One dude dropped his stuff, and the others kept going right at him. He collapsed in tears. Man, circus life must be stressful. The ringmaster rushed over to juggler and hurried him off the stage, dabbing at his brow and glancing at you.>Wave at him with a grin on your face.>Your food bag is empty! Point at it so he can see the bag is empty.>Have a big yawn.>Pick someone to sit next to, VIP seat is boring.
I'm pretty sure Shax has some control over anything that produces light.
>>33231924>OtherGive them a thumbs down and a stern face to show that they're boring us, and we'll leave if they continue.They'll get what we mean, right?
>>33231924>Wave at him with a grin on your face.Because it's probably the most unnerving thing we can do right now.
>>33231924>Have a big yawn.>Pick someone to sit next to, VIP seat is boring.
>>33231924>Have a big yawn.Step it up, carnies.
>>33231956This would work.
>>33231924>Have a big yawn.
>>33231924>>Your food bag is empty! Point at it so he can see the bag is empty.>>Have a big yawn.
>>33231924>Your food bag is empty! Point at it so he can see the bag is empty.
>>33231924>Wave at him with a grin on your face.
>>33231924That must have been an interesting conversation.>"Okay, so there is a goblin outside carrying a sword larger than you are. We're not sure, but we think it's the same goblin who took Valenwood almost single-handedly. I know you guys have already clocked out and hit the booze, but she wants to see a performance, and I want my organs to remain inside my body, so get out there.">their faces when
Are you trying to torture these poor men?You monsters!Writing.
>>33231924>>Wave at him with a grin on your face.
>>33231924>Sit next to AlloncesVIP seat worst seat. Alfonse-chair best seat.
>>33232129Don't forget the horde of goblins, the lewd decadent corrupted elf, and the troll.
>>33232194You mean Allonces-chair, she's our pet, which means she's also our chair.
When will we snuggle Allonces
>>33232367When the ringleader tries to get Shax too drunk to kill everyone.He's not very smart.
>>33232367Never.Allonces is purely for bullying.
>>33232383That would be just terrible.Just. Terrible.
>>33232391No rason we can't do both.
>>33232383drunk shax destroyed a elven stronghold almost singlehandedly...so if thats his goal gods help him
>>33232391Making the victim think that you hate them, then snuggling fills them with so many conflicted feelings, it's practically the highest form of bullying.
You're watching the remaining three jugglers with a little interest. They're juggling knives and flaming sticks and stuff! That's gotta be dangerous. When you reach in to grab more crunchyfluff, you find the bag is empty. Woah. You didn't know you were pigging out on this stuff. You make a pretty stern face. Maybe you should watch your weight? But you were pretty hungry. You make eye contact with the ringleader, and after a big yawn, you point at your empty bag with your thumb. This seems to really upset him, and he rushes the jugglers off the stage. They were pretty good, too! Guess there is no time for rest in the circus life.A person rushes over to you with another bag of stuff, and you thank him for it. He stares at you for a moment, and then runs off. Guess you gotta be kinda weird to work in a place like this. The next people up are some acrobats! Wow! You were told there were three, a family, but only two came out. The third one is apparently 'under the weather'? They get on these ropes and fling themselves around at each other. It seems really hard to do, but kind fun and kinda cool at the same time. They seem fairly professional, but they sorta stick to the same tricks. You guess if there was a third person they could do some crazy stuff? One person almost slipped, and that was kinda exciting, but shortly after they left the stage. Next up were a bunch of clowns. They were kinda funny! Tripping all over the place and hitting each other. One threw up and was groaning on his hands and knees, so that was kinda weird, but the others were acting like nothing happened so you assume it was all part of the act. Still, you were expecting some sorta big show! This all seems like stuff street performers could do.>Find someone to hang out with! Ask him what they think of the show so far.>Your back hurts, get up and step outside for a bit.>Go into the back room real quick, to see the performers.>Smile and wave at the ring leader.
>>33232583>Go into the back room real quick, to see the performers.Maybe we can encourage them to do their best work, they ought to love seeing us.
>>33232583>>Go into the back room real quick, to see the performers.>>Smile and wave at the ring leader.Encourage them to do their best!
>>33232583>Go into the back room real quick, to see the performers.>Smile and wave at the ring leader.
>>33232583>>Smile and wave at the ring leader.>Ask EVERYONE what they think of the show so far.
>>33232583>Go into the back room real quick, to see the performers.
>>33232583>Find someone to hang out with! Ask him what they think of the show so far.We should ask Sitri what she thinks so far. She does a lot of performing as a musical type, clearly she's the expert here.
>>33232583>Smile and wave at the ring leader.>Go into the back room real quick, to see the performers.
When Shax becomes the grand matriarch of everything she should make her own circus.
>>33232718>Implying she doesn't already run one
>>33232736Well shit, you're right.
>>33232601>Maybe we can encourage them to do their best work, they ought to love seeing us.that sounds like a great idea
You guys are cruel.Writing!
>>33232773They are going to be so confused when Shax doesn't hurt them.
>>33232773Out of curiosity, what is the quality of our raiding party's equipment?
>>33232883It's actually gotten pretty good. None of it matches, though, of course.
>>33232904I assume our dosh is plentifully intensified?We should get one of the smart elves to use our dosh in their smart way for the raidings.
>>33232904Didn't we give that one goblin clan access to our elemental forge? And what is our blacksmith doing?We should have them improve the quality of our raid's gear as much as they can
>>33233052That stuff's on autopilot. It got a brief mention that we were picking shit up when we went to check on our vessel lady.
Noticing the ringmaster looking at you nervously, you give him a big smile and wave at him. His jack slacks and he blanches. What a weird guy. He almost forgets to introduce the next act as the performers start heading towards the stage. Strong men? Boring. They're lifting weights that are pretty big, but that's not really something that impresses you. Maybe you oughta check some places out while this is going on? It looks like it might take a while... Sliding out of your seat, you walk towards the place where all the performers were going after their act.You poke your head around the corner."Gods damn I hope that wasn't the last performance of my life." "Oh shit I feel like I'm going to throw up again..." "I'm sorry I wasn't there, I just, I couldn't-" "Shh, it's okay. We did fine without you. It's okay."What the heck happened here? It looks like someone died. A clown notices you. You're not sure if it is a he or a she, but their eyes widen at the sight of you. They put a finger up to their lips. Whattaya gotta be quiet for? The clown slaps their forehead as you round the corner and wave at the performers. Gotta lift their spirits! "Hi! I'm Shax. You guys all did great."There is a chorus of moans, screams, and pleadings for their life. Whoa. Several people run from the room, and after a moment, most are on their knees, in the corner, staring blankly at you while sitting down, or the ambiguous clown in front of you. "Hey," The clown says in a quiet voice, "You're scaring them all to death, you know?"Wow, you're scary? Cool! You don't think you've ever been scary before.>Tell them what a good job they've done!>Point out the very obvious mistakes and what they could improve on.>Ask the clown person what their name is and what gender they are.>Ask them what their favorite food is.>Ask them what the coolest person in the raid group is in their opinion.
>>33233275>Ask them what the coolest person in the raid group is in their opinion.Gee I wonder
>>33233275>Tell them what a good job they've done!>Ask them what the coolest person in the raid group is in their opinion.>Ask them if they're sick or something
>>33233275>Ask the clown person what their name is and what gender they are.>Ask them what their favorite food is.>Ask them what the coolest person in the raid group is in their opinion.Absolutely bombard them with questions!
>>33233275>>Point out the very obvious mistakes and what they could improve on.I'm sure they'll love us helping them improve their act!
>>33233275>Point out the very obvious mistakes and what they could improve on.Also: Inform them that we were sort of hoping to pick up a new person for our raid group here, but if they're all this shabby, maybe it wouldn't be worth our time to keep them around.
>>33233275>Point out the very obvious mistakes and what they could improve on.
>>33233275>>Ask the clown person what their name is and what gender they are.
>>33233275>>Ask them what the coolest person in the raid group is in their opinion.>Ask the clown person what their name is and what gender they are.>Ask them what their favorite food is.
We should go get our inner circle to vouch for our character. That'll fix all this fear.
"Hey! So I figured, you guys seem pretty nervous, but I could maybe offer some advice?" They're trying not to make eye contact. Other than the clown who is just staring right at you. "Like, juggling guy. If you mess up, it isn't a big deal! Just keep going like it is part of the plan. If you get upset, you just fall over and then the whole act is ruined. Gotta have better nerves you know," You give him a thumbs up, "I believe in you! And acrobat fellows, your act would probably be a lot more interesting with a third person! It can't be easy to train someone up to do that kinda stuff, but maybe you ought get someone spare? In case one person flakes out?" There is some crying, and the clown is still staring. You don't wanna look it in the eyes. "And, I'm not much for grossout humor. Maybe cut the vomitting thing out of the act?" You offer helpfully, smiling and nodding at the various downtrodden clowns.You put your sword into the ground and lean on it, "So now that I've gotten that off my chest, give me some real talk, too. Who do you think is the coolest person in my lil' raid group here. C'mon. Be honest. You can't hurt my feelings. We're being honest with each other." The clown still stares at you, but the other people all glance at each other. "Speak up, now.""I like you," The clown says in monotone, with a completely blank expression. Wh-what?"I like the fish-guy..." The young acrobat says, "The one with the crab arms. He's funny." "Oh! I think that elf girl is pretty cute. The cute one, not the weird stalker one." "I like the stalker." "You would. How'd the cutie with the horns not get mentioned? I feel like I'm the only one who even knows she exists." "Gross, man. She has goat legs." They all seem more relaxed, now!You hear some commotion behind you in the big top. You wonder what all the fuss is about?>Go out there with your new friends!>Tell your new friends good bye and go out by yourself.>Worry about it later! You have new friends to talk to.
>>33233876>Go out there with your new friends!
>>33233876>Poke your head out, it may be important.
>>33233876>>Go out there with your new friends!
>>33233876>The cute one, not the weird stalker one." "I like the stalker."what stalker elf girl?
>>33233876>Go out there with your new friends!Shax should put on her own show. Between her acrobatic sword-fighting style and the light show she could put on with her birds and lasers it would be pretty cool.
>>33233966Maybe the bounty hunter chick is following us around.Probably lied about our bounty being redacted.
I just realized that with how our fighting style defies physics to gain obscene momentum that if we combined that with our teleportation we could do some crazy broken surprise attacks.
Alright! You're heading out with some ofthe more brave performers.Give me a d20 roll, for reasons.
Rolled 13>>33234140Let's see if I can make up for the 1 before
Rolled 19>>33234140Oh boy, my first time rolling in OWQ!Inb4 I blow it for everyone.
>>33234145>>33234149>>33234158I guess we got the shitty rolls out of the way?
Rolled 17>>33234188Either that or this is gonna be one of those threads with only extreme failures and successes.
>>33234158You blow very well, anon.
>>33234220You really like turtle.fish.paint, don't you?
>that moment where you finish catching up in the thread and have to wait for writing
>>33234334I know that feel
>>33234334I'm one of the slower QMs, too. So that doesn't help!
>>33234381It's all good. To be honest I've never really followed quest threads, but this one is pretty neat.I'll just put it on my second monitor and play vidya while waiting
>>33234381Dude, I follow the original Girls und Panzer quest, and compared to Blackjack, you are literally Sonic the Hedgehog on crack.
A pillar of ice, crackling with dark energy goes flying towards you as soon as you step outside. You roll away from it, and it lands in the ground, dark tendrils snapping and slashing wildly. Oh dang what the heck"OHHH HO HO HO HO! You've shown your face at last, villain!" A girl with a massive axe is standing in the big top. The seats of the circus are encased in ice. Your minions appear to be hammering on it, but a blanket of translucent darkness seems to be buffering the ice against their attacks. "Well, then, Shax. Tell me! Are you not amazed at my splendid new artes!" She raises her arms and twirls, before bowing. She knows your name, but you don't remember...Oh, right! It's Axe Girl! You wave your sword angrily and shout right back at her, "Hey! Axe Girl! I was having a good time getting to know these people, why you gotta butt in!?"She points a finger at you, "Know them? You are holding their families hostage! Forcing them to dance for you on threat of death!""I just didn't want them runnin' off! They weren't going to play with me unless I did!" You slam the sword in the ground."You're a tyrant! Barbarian!""Party pooper! No fun havin' spoil sport brat!"She waves her arm, tossing some sort of blue jewel, and four spears of ice form above her head and come sailing at you, and ripping the sword out of the ground, you swat them out of the air.She lets loose another cackle, holding her hand over her mouth and glancing at you sidewise. "Give it up, Shax. Your brute force won't help you here! I've claimed thrones of darkness and ice! I'm like a demigod now! Just surrender for me, will you?">Tell her you got all the thrones of light which makes you cooler since you aren't a double dipping cheater.>Just charge her!>Tell your new friends to testify on your behalf.
>>33234570>Tell her you got all the thrones of light which makes you cooler since you aren't a double dipping cheater>Tell your new friends to testify on your behalf.could also be funny
>>33234570Yeeeeesssssss! Axe Girl is back!>Tell her you got all the thrones of light which makes you cooler since you aren't a double dipping cheater.>Tell your new friends to testify on your behalf.
>>33234570>Tell her you got all the thrones of light which makes you cooler since you aren't a double dipping cheater.>Show off dinosaur
>>33234570Ask her if her thrones came with cute lizard servants like yours did!
>>33234570>Shoot a laser.
>>33234570>Tell her you got all the thrones of light which makes you cooler since you aren't a double dipping cheater.>Tell your new friends to testify on your behalf.She actually leveled up along with us. Truly a worthy rival.
>>33234570>Point out how ironic it is that the hero has darkness and ice thrones, while the monster has light and crystal thrones.
>>33234570>Tell her you got all the thrones of light which makes you cooler since you aren't a double dipping cheater.>I'm like a demigod now!>only like a demigodGit gud, Shax is already already on the path to ascension.
>>33234570>Just charge her!
>>33234570>>Tell your new friends to testify on your behalf.
>>33234570Offer to let her visit your realm if she lets us visit hers.
>>33234570Man, Axe Girl. Pulling this when we're raiding makes sense but we aren't even furthering anyone's evil plans right now.Keep work at work,
>>33234570>Tell your new friends to testify on your behalf.
>>33234570just charge her
Alright! Give me another d20 before I start writing!
>>33234570>point out that "ice" is a small sunset of "crystal" so we can probably override her stuff if we really want to.
Rolled 19>>33234836Come on Axe Girl, be our friend already!
Rolled 2>>33234836C'mon, 1 or 20.
>>33234570Darkness and Ice, eh? Clearly we're destined to claim the fire thrones.
>>33234850>>33234859>>33234861WHAT IS GOING ONNNNNNNNNN
Rolled 13>>33234850>>33234859>>33234861The exact same rolls as last time.
>>33234841Subset, not sunset..l
>>33234145>>33234149>>33234158>>33234850>>33234859>>33234861I think I'm having Deja Vu..
>>33234870Oh hey, a crit success. Yay!
So how does rolling work in these things? Is it top 3, or average, or what?I don't frequent /tg/
>>33234870Just a few seconds late - we totally could've recruited herKeep her in Allonces tent, put a sign out front with "The two most annoying girls I know"
>>33234149>>33234850>>33234881Why do I keep rolling 13? Is this the dice god's way of joking about how unlucky I was to roll that one?
>>33234904A lot of Gm's use different systems. Chief does best of 3, I believe
>>33234904Best of first 3
>>33234570Funny. I have three thrones of light and am a champion of the Mother of the Sea. Does that mean I win?"
>>33234859>>33234861Wh-whatI don't remember Shax drinking in this thread yet>>33234904Best of 3 cause I was maximum pleb when I started the quest upAny further quests will have much more esoteric, and pointlessly opaque systems for my amusementRegardless; Writing!
>>33234570>Just surrender for me, will you?"Oh my god, she's asking for surrender? She wants to make Shax her pet!
>>33235196Come to think of it, last time we met she was a bit more do or die about all this.
>>33235212Last time we met was during a deathmatch tournament run by an insane demilich.
>>33235237It wasn't a deathmatch really and she was kind of surprised/upset that we had her surrender
>>33235349It was intended to be a deathmatch. The demilich was rather miffed that we kept resolving fights with the power of friendship rather than murdering bitches.
>>33235367Considering he was a demilich and likely more powerful than us he didn't really bother to enforce the rules if they were to be to the death.I thought it was more like, standard procedure to kill but not an iron-clad rule.
>ice>darknessWas Axe Lady really hot? She seems motivated by not being so hot.
Not to be outdone, you put your hands on your hips and hold you nose up in the air, and start to proudly state, "I'll have YOU know that I, Shax Gloombreaker, have-" Your battlefield instincts tell you something is coming! Also the clown behind you yelled 'look out' in a bored, monotone voice loudly, and you dodge as the oversized lance elf comes crashing down from the tent right where you are. She ducks in quick, pulling the sword in her other hand out of its scabbard and slashing at you, a swing you easily block. She's good, but you're better! Her eyes widen as you easily dance through her following spear thrust, sword slash, and downward thrust, and slam her in the chest with your sword, bowling her over.You smack her on the head with your sword harshly, which should be enough to put her down for now. "Impressive! But, I already said your brute strength was no good here, you musclehead!" Tossing another jewel, three pillars of ice shoot out of the ground, and quickly get carved by dark tentacles into the shape of teddybears. The tentacles then snake into the ice-bears' joints and start moving them! The Axe Girl hops into the middle of them, axe at the defensive.Rolling your eyes, you draw an astral pearl out. "As I was saying! I sat on some of those dumb old stone seats, too!""Ohh Ho ho ho! Of course you did! A simple cave creature like yourself can't afford finer furniture, after all. Go, Earl Bearska, Duke Bearling, Baron Bearston! Smash her to bits!" She points at you and the ice-bears charge at you, tendrils shooting out and dragging them faster than you expected.You focus and toss a pearl onto the ground. Moments later, a turtle bursts out of the ground, tossing one of the bears to the ground. The other three come out of the floor of the circus soon after. You've got a scrum on your hands!>Assist the turtles in bear mop-up!>Charge straight at Axe Girl! Try to take her out fast!>She's used more gems than you so far! Try to wear her out!
>>33235572>assist turtlesara ara axe girl makes my dick diamonds
>>33235572Use our lasers! This is why we learned how to make them!
>>33235572>Assist the turtles in bear mop-up!Turtles are superior to Bears.
>>33235572>>She's used more gems than you so far! Try to wear her out!Oh my god she's so adorable.
>>33235572>>Charge straight at Axe Girl! Try to take her out fast!
>>33235572>Earl Bearska>Duke Bearling>Baron Bearston>maximum kek[x] Charge!
>>33235609Yeah, this! Laser is not difficult!
>>33235572>Assist the turtles in bear mop-up!Bears can't compete with swords.
>>33235572>Yell at our crew to evacuate the circus folk.>Engage crazy person (Axe Girl) and see if we can laser her (blinding) in the face while we sword it out
>>33235572>She's used more gems than you so far! Try to wear her out!Use those explodey birds to to distract her from casting.
>>33235572>>Charge straight at Axe Girl! Try to take her out fast!Our crystal turtles are way more awesome than some teddy bears made of ice. You can't even properly hug a teddy bear made of ice. It's stupid. Besides: Attack casters and summoners first.
>>33235609>>33235670These.Also, we can teleport guys, don't forget that.
>>33235572Question: Could we theoretically laser the darkness out of her Ice (Crystal) Bears and replace it with our light, thus subverting them to our cause? Because if so we need to help our turtles to make sure she doesn't hijack them.
>>33235687WE CAN TELEPROT?!?
>>33235687Oooooh, yes. Teleport in her face and smack her down.
>>33235701We got a belt that does that from Dragon Lady.>>33235695If we're going to laser darkness, why not free our minions from their cage?
>>33235687Once per day though. I forever hold out hope that we will one day learn how to use it in conjunction with our sword to go full Mercenary Tao (without crashing horribly).
>>33235695We could always just throw down that giant glowstone and make all the darkness stuff retreat.
>>33235572>TELEPORT & WRASSLE
One of these kindsa votesWhere I have to countWriting!
>>33235710Let's hang onto that ace in'a hole for now. We can only port once and this is the very beginning of the fight.
>>33235783>not melding as much together as possibleI hope the clown wants to come with us.
>>33235783>counting votes>not just doing whatever you wantcounting is for nerds
>>33235572Throw a spear of light at her.I've had enough of her shit.
>>33235839>>33235808you callin me a nerd??
>>33235844Don't our spears explode? I don't want to ruin the tent.
>>33235844Seconding the spear throw. It's worth it, I think, to skewer her finally.She officially does NOT want to be our friend.
>>33235893I don't want to ruin Axe Girl.
>>33235893>>33235903I don't wanna ruin either.
>>33235893Nah, they're just really fuckin fast.
>>33235897She's just tsundere! She stalked Shax all the way to that other continent and picked up opposite powers and everything.
>>33235903I want to ruin herFor marriage
>>33235897Dude, she's a rival! If we kill her we're gonna end up with a new rival and we would have to learn how to piss them off all over again!
I love how she didn't even correct us on her name.
>>33235903>>33235919I want to ruin Axe Girl.SensuallyDamn, I missed DAQ.
>>33235872You're on what is pretty much the nerdiest 4chan board, after all.
>>33235903I do.>ohohoh captchaIT KNOWS
>>33235844Opposing this plan. We never take the time to savor combat. I'm willing to use Axe Girl as our excuse to have some one on one fun.
Why aren't we rolling any dice?
>>33235872That is the most entertaining animal gif I've seen in a long time. Bravo!No idea what you're trying to say with it though...
>>33236008Please don't suggest we roll more dice.
Rolled 6, 19, 18, 5, 20, 16, 14, 20, 19, 19 = 156>>33236061Never
Rolled 2>>33236008I'll roll just for you, anon-kun
Wait a minute. Axe Girl did the exact same thing Shax did. She got told to destroy ice/darkness thrones by a good deity and sat on them instead.
>>33236079NOOOOOUR GOOD ROLLSYOU FOOL
>>33236079I think I just used up all of my luck forever.
>>33235808>>I hope the clown wants to come with us.I hope everyone wants to come with us.
>>33236112Thank you for all the rounds of incoming failure.
>>33236085They're both just power hungry little girls with huge egos in the end. No sense of loyalty at all.
>>33236193To be fair, loyalty doesn't equate to longevity on the team Shax's playing on for now.
>>33236281It does too! Provided the loyalty is to Shax.Or Axe Girl apparently. Where's her half-orc bodyguard?
>>33236193Loyalty's for chumps anyway
Can we force our way into her cave, then claim it for Shax? We'll probably have to use the pearl to get a reaction going. Axe Girl already knows that people take her special place if she gets conquered, so I doubt she'll resist. Much.
>>33236193The only person Shax is loyal to is Sea Mom and that isn't even technically loyalty since Sea Mom's only "order" was to just do whatever the hell we want and inadvertently help her by doing it, possibly.
>>33236351Jesus anon, Shax is a good girl, she won't force her way into anyone's cave! She asks for consent first.
>>33236356Oh yeah, we forgot about our Sea Mom powers. Shax has so many powers.I am going to flip my shit if defeating Axe Girl counts as helping Sea Mom and gets us a Sea levelup.
Has Axe-Girl's name even been mentioned. I thought she said her last name once back at the deathmatch but that's it.
>>33236429Maybe when she introduced herself for the very first time? It doesn't matter. Even she has accepted that she is Axe Girl.
>>33236429The demilich called her Miss Vapulatin.
Four turtles! That's more than three bears! Even if you don't have names for them. "Um, Turtletops!" The Axe Girl laughs that laugh again at you, "Turtletank?" More obnoxious laughter! "Ahhh I give up!" You stamp your foot as she stands there, hand over mouth and laughing. You'll show her! You take your left hand and wave it to the side, three light orbs crackle into being. Concentrating, they turn into three small birds. Taking your sword in both hands, you start to charge at her, birds moving with you.To the side, you can see a turtle blasting a laser through one of the bears, as it drives a double handed hammer blow into its back, dark javelin-like tendrils lancing through the turtle to tear it apart. A double ko!Axe girl has a blue gem between her index and middle finger, and a black gem between her pinky and ring finger. Now is the perfect time to hit her with a bird! You will one at her but she doesn't seem to notice, "Ho? I won't let them discount your bravery, Shax!" She lifts her arm up, just as a bird slams into her side and explodes. She drops the jewels with a little 'kyaa' noise.Now's your chance! You rapidly close the distance with the girl, sword held like a lance. Noticing you approaching, Axe Girl holds her hand out, spraying a light icy mist at you. You have to squint your eyes against it and slow down a bit, and when you stab your sword into the ground she has already moved to the side. Your second bird hits her in the stomach at the same time as the third hits her in the back of her head, preventing her from maintaining concentration for the two jewels she's recovered."You've learned new tricks, I see. That's fine. Even my dogs can learn something new every now and then!"You're in close quarters combat with her and she's got two jewels ready to go! What's the plan?>Stay on her! Just hit her hard and fast and keep her off balance!>Save up for something big and take her out in one strike!>Play defensively, wait for turtle back up!
>>33236356Wait, if we're loyal to Sea Mom, and Axe Girl is out Good Clone, does that mean she has the patronage of Land Dad?
>>33236429Maybe she did but it isn't important.>>33235701Also we can grow giant sized.
>>33236487>>Stay on her! Just hit her hard and fast and keep her off balance!
>>33236487>Save up for something big and take her out in one strike!Then fuck it up with /tg/ rolls.
>>33236487shine your laser in her eye and stomp on her footteach that smug bitch a lesson
>>33236487>Save up for something big and take her out in one strike!That's how this stuff works, right?
>>33236487>Save up for something big and take her out in one strike!Throw down a glow stone to blind her and her bears and then set her up for a light lance.
>>33236487pick up her jewels and use them for yourself! Conversion or something !
>>33236487>>Stay on her! Just hit her hard and fast and keep her off balance!Shax is good at keeping Axe Girl off balance.
>>33236487USE MASKGET HUGE
>>33236487>Stay on her! Just hit her hard and fast and keep her off balance!
>>33236488I don't think Good Clone is appropriate.We're alignment Evil Good. So she's probably Good Evil.
>>33236487>>Save up for something big and take her out in one strike!
>>33236487>Save up for something big and take her out in one strike!Try to bait her into using a really big attack and teleport behind her to dodge it and counter attack.
>>33236487>Stay on her! Just hit her hard and fast and keep her off balance!Become huge, dominate fight. Maybe try and pull some fancy juke attack where we start swinging and teleport to invert the attack as she gets her guard up.
>>33236540I like this idea, stealing the jewels seems very gobliny.
>>33236487>Save up for something big and take her out in one strike!
We're reincarnating axe girl if she gets horribly unlucky and dies, right? I can't wait to see what she rolls.
>>33236487>Teleport behind her and give her a wedgie
>>33236701Axegirl the Baby Nightgaunt
Alright, I've got a good idea of what the plan is, then.Gimme a d20 roll! And blame the anon who rolled like twelve 19's and 20s in one post if it doesn't work!
>>33236701I'm expecting something really silly to happen in this fight. Like the feedback from all the astral pearls accidentally fuses their realms together and makes them eternal demi-god neighbors.
Rolled 18>>33236741GO AXE GIRL
Rolled 19>>33236741nat 1 inc
Rolled 3>>33236759nat1 incumming
Guys, this fight is a good opportunity to pull out one of Sea Moms skills, we need to use one to rank up anyway.
Rolled 19, 7, 17, 11, 14, 13, 7, 15, 13, 14 = 130>>33236741>And blame the anon who rolled like twelve 19's and 20s in one post if it doesn't work!Hah! I didn't make anything bad happen.
>>33236765WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENINGSHAX FINALLY GOT GUD
>>33236765>>33236759What the fuck is with our luck today.
>>33236765>>33234861>>33234859>>33234145>>33234158By the gods, these 19s. Chief are you sure Shax didn't get drunk behind the scenes?
>>33236765Always with the 19s!
>>33236759>>33236765COMPETANCE!>>33236777Pretty sure we need to do stuff that helps out sea mom.
>>33236759>>33236765Axe Girl clearly never played Fire Emblem. Sword beats Axe.
>>33236778As you can see, we have now exited that little cluster of extreme luck. Still slightly above average, but nothing to write home over.
>>33236765there is no greater pride a man can feelthan that of his daughteru succeedingWriting!
>>33236794Someone spiked her popcorn.
>>33236807No actually, like one of the end of thread evaluations said all we need to do to reach the next rank is to actually use a skill.
>>33236840I don't want to cut axe girl's axe in half!
>>33236859We can cut her clothing in half.
I guess having a rival really brings out the best in Shax.
Oh, right. We took out that one elf chick during this fight, huh?She jobbed so hard I almost forgot her.
>>33236880I'd be down with that.Also, who wants to bet we could shut her darkness powers down by summoning that Glarestone?
>>33236840>Five More Minutes Mom will level up the next time you do absolutely anything for the Sea Mom!So like if we graffiti land dad sucks on a wall somewhere, not just using powers.
>>33236909I've suggested that twice now but no takers.
>>33236880Let's do that.
>>33236931She'll just summon a darkness stone to counter it.
>>33236487>, "Ho? I won't let them discount your bravery, Shax!" She lifts her arm up, just as a bird slams into her side and explodes. She drops the jewels with a little 'kyaa' noise.She has Shax fanfiction.
>>33237038It's not a give-in that she's as far down her elemental paths as we are. Maybe she has breadth but less depth.
>>33237038Or she'd be blinded by our light and accidentally drop her stones.
>>33236820Spent the last 30 minutes or so making a super rough doodle. Hopefully it's not crap.
>>33237207Looks great, anon!
>>33237207Dang, dude! That's awesome! I really like it! I don't have enough action Shax in my life, so I appreciate it.
>>33237207That, Anon, is not crap. It is in fact, quite good.
>>33237207Her armour has/had war paint on it.Its one of the things she added when making it waaay back in thread one.
>>33237217>>33237257Thanks.>>33237254I'm really glad you like it! Is there anything super wrong with it aside from what >33237303 mentioned? I think I gave her the wrong number of fingers, since the OP pic has her with 3 and a thumb and I gave her normal person hands.
>>33237207It's cute and matches my head canon.
>>33237334She looks perfect to me! I don't think the war paint has ever been drawn anywhere by anyone, so it isn't exactly an issue at this point.I think the three fingers thing is just two real close to each other.
>>33237207draw a crystal turtle shell under her
A fight like this is decided in a single blow! You don't need to go all out just yet! Regaining her balance, Axe Girl strikes a pose again, "Now, are you ready, Shax! For my ultimate skill!" You lift a finger and shine some lasers in her eyes, "YEeaaaughwwahwhat the heck was that?!" She dropped her jewels again, which you notice because you instinctively follow the movement of all jewels. It's a goblin thing.You wonder if you can use those? You dive under an axe swing, one that felt more like a test than anything else, roll along the ground, and scoop her gems up. Let's see what these babies can do."Ah! Wait! Those are mine, you common thief!" She actually reaches out like you're going to give them to her. "Hand those over this instant!" You just stick your tongue out at her. A shocked expression crosses her face, and she picks up her axe and charges at you. She's just yelling mixtures of 'uncouth' 'swine' 'trollish cave girl' 'filthy.'Concentrating on the gems, you're uncertain of what you can do with them. You toss the darkness one out. There is a small burst of light and a tiny lizard pops out of a cloud of smoke, lands on the ground and skitters off. Well, that wasn't particularly useful. A nice party trick, though?Might as well use up her other gem! You toss the ice one right at her. A glittery powder comes out and covers her in really tacky looking glitter, causing her to sputter a bit. Oh... This might be your chance? You put a hand on your belt buckle, pressing a button there and teleport behind her. She glances back just in time for your sword to come down at her. "Wait I'm not do-" And that's that for her!Or you thought it was. You cut through some sorta ice double? A dark essence leaks out of it, and forms not to far away. Axe girl staggers a bit, propping her self up with her axe, and coughs out a weird dark ichor. Whatever trick she used seems to have some serious side effects!>Capture her!>Finish her off!
>>33237673>>Capture her!AHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAWHO'S UNCOUTH NOW
>>33237673>Finish her off! FINISH HER
>>33237673CAPTURE HERmake her our sex slave>the laser idea got put inthank you based chief
>>33237673>Capture Axe Girl!
>>33237673>Capture her!Killing rivals isn't kosher and she's from a prominent family or something.
>>33237673>Capture her!There's no other way.
>>33237673>Capture her!We can't just kill our rival!
>>33237673>Capture her!When did we start playing naruto?
>>33237673spear her face
>>33237673>Capture her!RIP orc friend ;_;
>>33237673capture also ask what happened to the halfork guy
So does shax ever actually take off her bracelet?
>>33237673>Capture her!Maybe we can finally learn her name.Not that we'd stop calling her axe girl.We learned dragon lady's name and I've completely forgotten it.
>>33237673I guess she's not that impressive when she doesn't have an awesome bodyguard guy!Also, why are elves so much less cool than... everything else?
>>33237831I don't understand.
>>33237831nope it was a gift from squidface
Ahhh? You guys didn't want to kill her and then reincarnate her just to see what would happen? I was hoping for d100 rolls tonight...So you want to capture her, then? She's not going to go easily.Let's test fate... one more time! Give me a d20!
>>33237844She was actually a hell of a lot more impressive this time. She even pulled off some clever tricks despite our amazing dice. This was probably one of the most drawn out fights of this quest.Last time she pretty much jobbed while the half-orc did all the cool things.
>>33237673>BEFRIEND her!Which, just to be clear, does NOT mean killing!
Rolled 9>>33237882ok for real now, nat 1 inc
Rolled 1>>33237673[x] Gotta Catch Them All!>inb4orcmanservant
>>33237831And let some other goblin swipe it? ¡No way José!
>>33237906Holy shit. Do we get a bonus for so many fucking 19's?
>>33237897>>33237899>>33237906Oh, oh my
Rolled 11>>33237882Let's hope this doesn't bite us in the arse.
>>33237906>Rolled 1d20: 19I don't know what is going on tonight, but I like it!
>>33237906Shax. Shax. Pls.
Rolled 11>>33237908Oh god please let my nineteen have made that one not count
>>33237882I'm just not sure how her being able to wield her oversized weapon would turn out what with the bloodline thing.
>>33237906ANOTHER FUCKING 19 WHAT THE HELL!>>33237908And thank god you were 5 seconds too slow.
>>33237908Fourth! By the skin of out teeth we have >>33237906!
>>33237882But then she might not be a cute little girl anymore!Why would I want such a fate?
>>33237944Best of three, based anon. We're cool
>>33237944Don't worry anon, it's not even in the first 3 anyway.
>>33237964She might be a cute GOBLIN girl!
>Shax Gets Whatever The Fuck She Wants: The Movie
>>33237906My dick is literally diamonds right now.
>>33237989Except a circus crew that isn't so terified of her they fuck up their acts.
>>33237989The only critfail tonight was something completely outside her control, and she managed to turn that around with sheer charisma.
>>33237985I'm not willing to take that chance.She's plenty cute as is. We might get some dumb elderly furry guy by accident.
>>33237964So that we can bully her relentlessly when she turns into a male gnome
>>33237906The dice gods love rivals.
We should work out a deal where Shax and Axe Girl kill each other constantly and always reincarnate the other.It'd be adorable.
>>33238024Hey, we still have their families as hostages and clearly most of what they needed was a pep talk. Still plenty of time for them to put on a good show.
>>33237964>>33238031/tg/, playing it safe and NOT picking the mysterious box? Truly, I have seen everything.
>>33237906How>>33237908Five seconds away from a dead Axe Girl and mortally wounded ShaxWriting!
>>33238078She's already cute! If she was ugly you better believe we'd shove her in the box.
>>33238075>Shax>Ever dyingNice joke, but my money's on deification.
>>33238098Well, yeah. I never said it would be a fair deal for Axe Girl.
>>33238098>not going the Simon routeShe'll be a roaming goblin hobo, watching over all the galactic goblin empire
>>33238138Why would you want a Gainax ending?Gainax endings are never good.
>>33238165fite me m80I got goosebumps just watching the few seconds it took to get a make this
>>33238084Chief, why do you have such good taste in erotic manga?
>>33238284>tfw there's a copy of an unaltered and uncensored renai sample and there still is no upload on sukebei
You make a face at the ichor she is coughing up on the ground. That stuff is pretty gross. Even for you. You tip toe over. "What, uh, what is the deal with that, Axe Girl?"Wiping her sleeve on her mouth, she glares at you, "Bleeech. A little precaution I had. In case you did something dastardly. And you did! But, behold, I lived through your super final attack." You don't wanna tell her that you still have seven astral pearls and several magical artifacts left to use. Actually, you do want to tell her that."You know I'm totally loaded with super attacks and loot, right?" You give her a pitying glare as you inch closer. Her legs are shaking, and she's nervously looking at the exit.With a sniff of disapproval, the axe girl turns her head, "Like I'd believe anything from your dirty mouth.""Least my mouth ain't literally filled with dirt.""And who put it there? Along with this dreadful glitter!"It's your turn to laugh at her. You snicker at first and work it up to a good cackle, just to get practice at it. Then you lunge at her. Gotta smack her on the head to shut that sassy mouth up. She blocks with her axe, and throws a blue gem from her free hand, which you manage to barely block a lance of solid ice from stabbing you through the chest of, staggering backwards from the impact.Dropping her axe, she unclenches her hand, revealing three dark gems, "Hah! Got you, Shax!" She clenches it shut, and... Staggers over. The juggler domed her in the noggin with a pin. What. When she staggers back up on her feet, a few more pins hit her, and the weird clown from before shows up behind her, kicking the back of her knees. After she falls down, he smacks her soundly in the skull with a frying pan.Clowns, man. What is their deal?
>>33238392>clowns causing our rivalfu to get brain damage
>>33238392Not only are we not killing ANYONE OR THING from the circus, we're paying them for the day's worth of entertainment they've provided us and our troops.
>>33238437RIP Axe GirlClowned to death
>>33238437That's why we gave Allonces those new spiffy healing powers! Ok, no, this is not why we got her Championified, but it's still a legitimate case where we can make her clean up our mess!
That's it for tonight! It was a lot of fun! I ran about an hour longer than I thought I would, so I hope it was worth it. You dudes are great. Thanks so much for playing along, talking, participating, or even just reading! You dudes really make my day.Especially since you're all so cool Yes, even you, guy who has never voted once and feels bad for just lurking. Even you are cool in my book for just having a good time with me.Anyway! I'll do exp next thread, for reals, I promise, on the real, for sure! The next thread should be wed/thurs as normal. Hope to see you there!If, somehow, you've read forty three threads and haven't followed me on twitter, it is: @FouldrinkingIf you want to see updates of when I'mma running. I only very super rarely post unrelated stuff. Don't be scared.>>33238437She's just knocked out. It's cool! She might have a concussion though. Okay, she definitely has a concussion.
>>33238460>we're paying them for the day's worth of entertainment they've provided us and our troops.Something we'd do anyways even without the help. We even made sure not to hurt any of the guards.
>>33238489Hell no! That clown is clearly a depressed god/ancient dragon/Capital "P" Power on the equivalent of a depression fueled drunken bender. Do not attempt to fuck with him!
>>33238517Thanks for the story, broseph.I like your writing style. >choosing between dota and spess station honking images
>>33238517I love you for running later than normal. Thanks for running. Have fun cropping lewd images from godlike doujins to post as reaction images!
>>33238517>Yes, even you, guy who has never voted once and feels bad for just lurking.Oh shit he knows.SHUT IT DOWN
>>33238517How much exp stuff do we have in the backlog anyway?
>>33238582Like, 2 threads worth. I think.
>>33238517Thanks for the run Chief.Still working on the final version, just realized that I forgot to give Shax non-human ears. I'm fixing it, but here it is for anyone who wanted to see it.
>>33238517>exp thingHang on, before you go I just wanted to verify that Enchantment won the vote back in thread 39 since the Shax's ability sheet says we haven't acquired it yet?
>>33238619Oh shit she's scary. That face coupled with her huge fuckoff sword would turn my pants brown.
>>33238728...That is by far the best ability chart I have ever seen.I really need to read this quest.
>>33238983it happened completely by no effort of my own, I assure yousome benevolent anon manages it for me and I don't know why
>>33238728We really need to pick up EVERYBODY CALM DOWN, Axe Girl would have been the perfect target for it.
>>33239016I think he means the names. Thanks though.
>>33239016How come you never post he skill pastebin anymore?
>>33239066it is horrifyingly out of date and I keep procrastinating on updating it it is all my fault I'm horrible I understand if you hate me now!
>>33239089Well, as long as it shows up by the time we actually finally get exp it's all good.
>>33239018While this is true, I'd rather get Dark Queen first. We've been inching towards solidifying our status as a faction leader for awhile now, it's only a matter of time before we get roped into the politics of Team Evil's little alliance. When that happens I damn well want to make sure our troops are loyal to us first and anything else last.
>>33238392i guess she's just down to clown till she's dead in the ground
>>33239368My thoughts exactly. Everybody Calm Down has its potential uses, but Dark Queen is going to be a veritable necessity sooner or later, and we can't really know for sure whether it'll be needed "sooner" or "later".
>>33239413>necessityCome now, no skill is a necessity in this quest. Shax will bumble her way through no matter what.
>>33239089I do not hate. But... How do I explain this feeling? It is not anger. Is it disappointment? Yes. That is what it is.It is LOVE