>>32698178
He summons up his water sprite and she fills the boiler post haste. While she does so, Tabula gives you a look not of anger, but of disappointment. “Don't yell.”

“I'm sorry, but!” You stop yourself from shouting, “I'm sorry, but we need to get going. We're already losing tons of ground to that fucking cat!”

“Command.” Tabula says, “Don't yell. When you yell, it looks like you have no idea what you're doing. When you calmly command, everyone will think you know what you're doing, so they'll do their job.”

The sprite closes the hatch, which already has steam spewing out, and then disappears in a flash of light.

Soon enough the machine begins to come back to life, but the fire in the boiler room dies down, except the eternal fire you had started. Looking down from your perch on the deck, you can see that the entire wooden decor inside is burnt up into ash.

“Yarr, don't worry about it, cap'n!” The pirate proclaims, “There ain't anything we can do, 'cept drinkin' and singin'!”

You lean over the side of the ship and look at the road ahead. Green hills and mountains as far as you could see.

[ ] Consult the map. Try to find a different path.
[ ] Drink and sing with the party.
[ ] Other.

>>32698185
FUCK FUCK FUCK

>[ ] Consult the map. Try to find a different path.

I am so ready to make a deal with Coyote or the Grinning Man.

>>32698185
>[ ] Other.
Get Takishi to feed the BRO our enemies to see if that's what caused it to be faster

>>32698185
>[ ] Drink and sing with the party.

....Yeeeeaaaah, next time, don't bitch about the cat.

>>32698185
>[ ] Drink and sing with the party.

>>32698185
>[ ] Drink and sing with the party.

You gotta take it easy, man

>>32698332
>>32698321
>>32698275

[+1 Folk Music Affinity]
[+1 Lander Knowledge]

>ship is destroyed
>people want to sing

I hope we at least fix shit while we're singing.

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>>32698407
You shrug. “I guess you're right!”

“Yarr! Grog for everyone!” Trove announces. The pirate begins tossing bottles of brown liquid to everyone.

You all stand on the stern of the land-ship, drinking your grog, when Aideen says, “Oh, I know the perfect song for this!”

She clears he throat and begins to sing.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-WvqlzID1FM

“We're on the one road, sharin' a one note.

“We're on the road to gods know where.

“We're on the one road, maybe the wrong road,

“But we're together now who cares!

“Northmen, Southmen, comrades all!

“Gaelin, Olsraft, Bourg, or Dahni's Hall!

“We're on the one road, swinging along,

“Singing a soldier's song!

“Though we've had our troubles now and then,

“Now is the time to make them up again!

“Sure aren't we all Emeralds anyhow!

“Now is the time, step together now!”

You suddenly interrupt, “Wait, wait, wait. Emeralds? Are you asking if we're emeralds?”

“Huh?” Aideen looks confused, “What's wrong with being an Emerald?”

“Because we're people and not gemstones?”

“Being an Emerald means you're from the Emerald Island.”

“Oh, of course! You're from the Emerald Island!” You had no idea what she meant, but you were rolling with it.

>>32699044
She smiles. “No.” She responds, “I was born in Boulder, but some people from the Emerald Island, like my family, came to here many years ago. Most of them don't leave the 13, though.”

“Oh.” You respond, “And the 13 are...?” You knew that you should have paid more attention to the story of the game, but all that reading was something you had the patience for.

She sighs, “The 13 is short for the Thirteen Allied Kingdoms of the New World.”

“Oh.” You respond, “And Boulder is apart of that?”

“No, Boulder is apart of the kingdom of Misvert.”

You stare at the Lander for quite a while.

[ ] “So, these kingdoms... Tell me more.”
[ ] “Just... Just go back to singing.”
[ ] “You know what? I think I'm going to go replace the deck.”
[ ] Other.

>>32699061
>[ ] “You know what? I think I'm going to go replace the deck.”

Time to fix shit.

>>32699061
>[X] '"Just...Just go back to singing."
Maybe we should apologize.

>>32699061
>[ ] “You know what? I think I'm going to go replace the deck.”

>>32699061
>[ ] “So, these kingdoms... Tell me more.”
>[ ] “You know what? I think I'm going to go replace the deck.”

I'm interested, but I'd also like to get back to the race that we're currently losing.

Tell us all about it while we fix shit. Also, ask about Coyote and the MiB. Maybe a lander is a better lorefag than Lilac?

>>32699061
>[ ] “You know what? I think I'm going to go replace the deck.”

I'd like to do something to protect our now exposed internals.

>>32699061
>[X] “You know what? I think I'm going to go replace the deck.”

>>32699070
>>32699087
>>32699089
>>32699104
>>32699120

>>32698185
>[ ] Drink and sing with the party.

We all need a good stress reliever.

>>32699154

Well that's informative.

>>32699154
Woops, forgot the things.

[+1 Protection]
[+1 Cleaning up Takeshi's Mess]

>>32699061
>[ ] “So, these kingdoms... Tell me more.”

You guys don't want a lore wizard?

>>32699167
I am only a decade late!

I swear!

Guys, I think I figured out why we aren't going as fast as we had before. It's because Takeshi is no longer feeding the BRO the bodies of our enemies. He is stupid enough to just shove the bodies into the boiler and when they explode into bubbles they provide more power for the engine.

>>32699300
I think the melted gold would clog up the pipes, though

File: 1356635128731.jpg (67 KB, 473x480)

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Racer Status

Ahead of us:
>Lilac and the Mag-neato-Mobile
>TopCat and his Bullshit Bike
>>Think Pink and their Pink Power Pedaler

Not ahead of us:
>GodKingFluffles [snicker] and his Rose Rocket
>Swag Bros and their SWAG SWAG SWAG Swagger

Currently losing:
>Ambrosis and the Big Red Dud

>>32699387

Didn't we pass the Pink Guys?

Could've sworn we did last thread.

>>32699387
>GodKingFluffles [snicker] and his Rose Rocket

Is leading the pack in the sky right now.

>>32699409
Think Pink were the first people you passed in the race.

Still Writing.

[-1 Roll of Steel Silk]

>>32699454
>[-1 Roll of Steel Silk]
Kill them, kill them all

>>32699409
We passed GodKingFluffles. Think Pink we haven't seen since the race started and are probably ahead of us because who knows what magical BS a four man team can pull.

We really need to start using all of our party's powers. Canis needs to bard it up, Trove needs to pull some sailing skills out of his ass, and Aideen better make herself useful by either talking about her class and subclass or being our new lorefag.

>>32699454
Oh? Well okay then.

>>32699453
>implying he hasn't crashed

Landing is always the hardest part. We should talk to him after the race, though. That man will give us rocket launchers for the BRO and probably helicopters or biplanes too.

And we want rockets. So much firepower is a small and easy to carry package.

>>32699487

We passed Pink when we took the "shortcut" last thread.

>>32699508
My point on the merits of using multiple persons in a team still stands.

>>32699487
Can Canis buff the tank?

>>32699487
Aideen is our new lore witch to replace the last one.

>>32699525
He should try. Maybe drums give buffs to ship speed, like a galley slave pace drummer.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WXh1tW16V-8

>>32699546
What is going on there?

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>>32699681
>hasn't seen Ben Hur

Okay... well ignoring that detail: back in the bronze ages sails were designed primitively and only good if the wind was going the direction you wanted to go. Which means it was unreliable during naval warfare.

So you had enslaved rowers, known as galley slaves, to get the ship to go in the direction you wanted at the speed you wanted.

A drummer kept the pace and would beat faster when ordered to, meaning all the rowers had to keep pace or get the shit whipped out of them by guards.

The fastest, "ramming speed", is basically telling the galley slaves to row at an unsustainable rate for a quick burst of speed to ram another ship with the galley's bronze covered prow.

You didn't want to go at ramming speed too often. It's basically overclocking and if the galley slaves are all tired, you're dead in the water.

>>32699787
I meant why he is going at ramming speed to tire out his slaves, which is his ride home.

>>32699865
Watch Ben Hur.

>>32699902
Alright anon. Will do.

>>32699186
“You know what?” You respond, “I'm just going to go replace the deck.” You turn to look at the giant hole in the deck. Certainly there must be something in your inventory to fix this.

Iron? Nope.

Levers? Nope.

Gears? Nope.

Steel silk? Steel silk.

You pull the steel silk roll from your inventory and fling the roll out, holding one end. It lands on the other side, unfurling the cloth. You put the cloth to the deck and wonder how you are going to attach this to the wood.

“Does anyone have any nails?” You ask, holding you hand out behind you.

“Here, capin!” Trove shouts, “Yarr!”

You feel something land in your hand and you look back to see iron nails sitting there. You stare at it for a while before asking, “What were you doing with nails?”

“I always be ready to repair me ships. Yarr.”

Made sense.

After much banging, the nail finally breaks through the steel silk and into the wood. You do the same thing with another nail, then jump to the other side and do it two more times. You then painstakingly rip the cloth off and repeat the process several more times before the deck is complete, albeit in cloth. The roll is not almost all gone, certainly not enough to recreate the chair-glider, but perhaps it has found a better home in the deck of the land-ship.

You take a step onto the cloth-deck. It sags at the middle, but other than that, it appears to be quite suitable to what you need.

The wind is picking up again. You can feel that the ship has gone back to full steam. You look over the side of the ship to see a certain white-clad cat huffing and puffing on an upcoming hill.

He spots you.

He pushes his bike forward, but you have already passed him.

Then he begins to pedal.

He's gaining speed!

He's gaining ground!

You need to do something!

[ ] Custom Only

>>32700050
Wave Hello.

>>32700050
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L3HQMbQAWRc

We've got far better endurance than him, just keep trucking along. Going apeshit won't help.

>>32700050

Can Canis buff the tank with drums? Can the pirate make the land ship go faster? Can the rest of us do anything?

If our party members can help the panzer go faster, then that's what we should do.

Otherwise fast and steady should win the race. I'd rather not resort to tread crushing if we can help it.

>>32700082
I am for this anon.

We will pass him at night when he is resting anyways.

We want to sing pirate songs as we ride though. While he is sweating.

>>32700050

Chillax bros.

>>32700050
have a couple people in the crew put him on their friend list so that you can taunt him and make sure he gets no sleep.

>>32700150
Anons are the most vicious people on earth.

I approve.

>>32700150

Now that's just unsporting.

>>32700130
Trove has grog, right? Alcohol burns fast and hot, right?

>>32700150

Asshole much?

>>32700112

This, and sing the song while we're at it.

Lets get one of the girls to flash him!

>>32700112

I found a better song.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zQtw55f2d2A

>>32700214
>>32700149
>>32700146
>>32700112
>>32700082

[+10 Bein' Happy]
[+1 Sportsmanship]
[-1 Having Ever Seen Ben Hur]

>>32700279

Shep, Shep, I found a better song.

>>32700268

>>32700279
At least it is not [+1 joint]

>>32700279
Judi has seen Ben Hur, right?

>>32700298
The question is, what has Judi not seen?

1970's Midway?

>>32700279

But Ben Hur's ship sinks in the movie!

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>>32700314
Judi strikes me as a /k/ommando, so I'd say she has seen most classic war movies.

>>32700363
Then can we flaunt about knowing about American Pie in front of her to get her puzzled face?

...Is there any way we can get to ride on a steam tank the rest of the way?
Can Lily give us some water when we need to move?

>>32700478
You mean to New York? Anon, I think we're going to be riding in a convoy all the way over there.

>>32700499
Yeah.
I want to always be in a steam tank now.
50 mph is pretty nice, if the magic-using dwarf blacksmith can provide the fire and water for us.

Honestly, it doesn't really matter if we win the race or not.
We've managed to create steam battleships.

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>>32700551
I'm thinking we go on a recruitment drive.

There's a bunch of PvP gankers who would probably want to get the fuck out of Area 51 and maybe we could work out some kind of deal with the Justicefags.

Call it a "penal labor" and then when we're far enough away tell them that it was a ruse and they can either stick with us and drive an awesome tank or just get off at the next city.

Or, if they're not into that, try for a formal alliance with the Justicefags and recruit some more of their guildmembers.

Also, we're apparently supposed to help free the prisoners.

>>32700616
>Honestly, it doesn't really matter if we win the race or not.
It's almost like you don't want to give a speech about how symbology isn't a word.

>>32700679
We cut the noose already. With a beam of sunshine.

>>32700679
How about we start our own guild?
Our signature can be how we're all riding along in fucking tanks.

>>32700679
All the options go through your mind, but then you realize he had no stamina. He has to sleep. The BRO does not. You just smile and begin to wave at him.

“Don't worry.” You sing, “Be happy.” You start snapping to the beat of the old Bob Marley song. “WooooooooOOOoOOOooooo.”

He goes zooming by.

You continue to wave until he is out of sight. You let out a satisfied sigh and turn around to the others.

“Don't worry...

“About a thing.

“Cause every little thing...

“Gonna be all right.

You continue to groove out calmly to your own rendition of Bob Marley songs.

After completing your third song you let out a loud yawn. Only now do you feel your exhaustion.

You look out to the terrain around you. What was once green and mountainous is now a yellowish gray sea of bushes. You're in the Mojave. The final stretch of the race.

[ ] Go get some sleep.
[ ] Stay up just a bit longer.
[ ] Other.

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>>32700758
I keep forgetting my pic.

>>32700679
>spoilers
Interested interpretation you have there.

>>32700758
>[ ] Stay up just a bit longer.

>>32700724
well apparently we're not going to be winning if we let all of these people get past us.

>>32700758
>[X] Go get some sleep.

>>32700758
stay up, ask trove if any of his pirate abilities can get us moving faster, especially since we dont have to worry about turning in the middle of the desert

>>32700758
>[ ] Go get some sleep.

We need sleep for our shift.

>>32700724
No, I'm just saying, we've got a real moneymaker here.
LOADS of people will want steam tanks.

>>32700758
[X] Stay up just a bit longer.
Don't trust the bushes. They hold only lies.

>>32700758
>[ ] Go get some sleep.

We really need the sleep for when it's our turn to drive the BRO again.

>>32700758
>[X] Stay up just a bit longer.
>-[x] Ask Trove if any of his pirate abilities can help the steam tank... both those that would and wouldn't count as cheating

>>32700758
>[ ] Go get some sleep.

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>>32700616
Winning means money. We need money for more parts to improve the BRO and build other tanks.

BRO is pic related, a super-heavy tank, but we need other tanks to support it.

>At least two main battle tanks to bring some all rounder strength
>one or two light tanks to scout and generally be fast
>an armored personnel carrier to move guardians around the battlefield quickly
>a flame tank for that close range support
>a tank destroyer to punch through armor and stone
>maybe a self-propelled artillery for shell or rocket support
>maybe an aircraft of some kind for air support

So that's 6 to 9 vehicles in total. I'm not saying we build all of them, some people could probably make their own, but that's what I'm hoping for.

And, so Tiny doesn't freak out, we don't need to know the names of everyone. We'll just be a moderately sized fightan and engineering guild.

>>32700758
>[ ] Stay up just a bit longer.
>Other

Ask Canis, Trove, and Aideen if they can help in any way. Buffs or skills are needed right now.

>>32700870
>That picture
>THAT PICTURE

Anon, you could've posted a Baneblade or Maus, why in heavens' name would you post that one?

>>32700897
Because it has a rocket launcher and that's exactly what BRO should have.

>>32700758
>[X] Go get some sleep.

>>32700870
Selling our engineering skills would ALSO make money.
It should make a shitton of money.

>>32700923
Unless we secure an alliance with the Cowboy guild or any other guild, I don't think we should sell to them.

Our monopoly is tedious and if our dreams hint at anything, won't last for long. We'll need to choose our friends very wisely and have strict "You do not get to resell our tanks" clauses in our alliance contract along with other stipulations, like letting the PvP guilds repent.

Are you all abandoning the sky? What happened to making flying machines?

>>32700758
>[ ] Go get some sleep.

>>32700915
>o Tiny doesn't freak out, we don't need to know the names of
>>32700857
>>32700837
>>32700813
>>32700806
[+1 Wellrestedness]

>>32700870
>we don't need to know the names of everyone
Too bad. You're going to know the names of everyone.

Everyone's name will be Bob.

>>32700957
>tedious

Tenuous.

>>32700963
Hire KingFluffles and offer to help him with his rocket engine.

There. Done.

>>32700963

TONKS HAPPENED.

>>32700963
Steam Tanks happened.

>>32700957
We've already got a dude who's a member of another guild who knows about this.

>>32700963
we discovered that landing is much more difficult than parking

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>>32700870
Its rather disappointing that the actual KV-6 was really just a flamethrower test variant. And yes. Photos do exist.

>>32700963
...can we make steam-powered zeppelins?
I mean, if we're going steampunk, might as well go all the way.

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>>32700980
>Bob

Or just address people with radio callsigns.

Ambrosis would be "Panzer Actual" (being the "actual" message from the commander and not a delegation of communications to a radio operator). Commander of the BRO would be "Red Command" or "Red Actual" while the radio operator would be "Red Wireless". The commander of (let's say) The True Lever would be "Lever Command" and the radio operator would be "Lever Wireless", and variations thereof.

So you only need to know the name of the vehicle and the position held by the person you're talking to. Quick, easy, and informative.

So when will we be making a guild?
And how can we get Judi invited?

>>32701140

Come to think of it, we need to name something the Swagon.

Also, did we ever manage to paint the BRO red?

>>32701120
That is actually more doable.

>>32701166
Anon, please.
Haven't the Swags suffered enough?

>>32701184

If they wanted the name then they should've taken it first.

>>32701184
Yes. Which is why we should hire them and help them build a steam tank of their very own.

Fuck, hire everybody from the race. If our sportsmanship gets us anything, it should be good will from our opponents.

You know, if we DO win, we could probably buy some really nice stuff in order to build another awesome steam tank.

File: kv_4designprop.jpg (1.3 MB, 2048x1872)

1.3 MB JPG

>>32701108
Luckily, the KV-4 design proposals were equally batshit.

>>32701174
Seriously?
Fuck, if we can do this I'm going to be so happy.

>>32701202
>hire Swagbros

You, I like you.

>>32701203
Actually, wait, no, bad idea.
We've only got one magic girl in the group, we can't power up 2 steam tanks at once.

>>32701239
Which is why we should try to hire some PvP guild members who would probably do anything to get out of the situation they're in.

We might even find a sailor. Or two.

>>32701239
Let them keep that tank in exchange for helping us build a better one...
Everyone working together, could be done.

Speaking of which, our subclass has to have gotten a ton of levels from making this thing right?

>>32701269
Remind me, is the pirate dude a member of any guild?
If not, we need to pick him up, because that guy is awesome.

>>32701303

According to thread 2, he's not a member of any guild.

So on a scale of 1 to 10, how upset would TinyShepher be if we tried to meta our way into having Takeshi do our food for us?

>>32701284
I'd recommend overhauling the BRO after the race, though.

It was built in only a few days and with no help from Lilac (who is either cheating, payed someone to fake it, or is 150% legit) or anybody else who actually knows something about automobiles.

Plus it ain't got no turrets and only one bedroom. We can do better than that.

Remake it lighter, faster, comfier, and more efficient. We'll probably only really need to take the top part off. The engine is probably fine.

>>32701353
He figured out taste came from cactus stuff, so we could theoretically ask him to try everything to make actual food. It's not that much of a logic leap, that ingredients have taste, so real cooked food might...

>>32701353
I'd only be upset if you do it before June 1st. After that point, all bets are off.

>>32701371
That... sounds pretty good, actually.
Just revamp the whole thing, spend about a week fixing it or so.
Meanwhile, we can test and apply what buffs and skills would work on steam tanks.

>>32701407
>June 1st
FUCK that's when the food riots are, isn't it?

What's our current date?

>>32701371
...Should we try and make it bigger?

>>32701415
Right. The main thing we should focus on is the transmission, which right now is all metal and heavy as fuck.

Whatever powers Lilac's car is apparently pretty small and efficient (she's beating us. Let that sink in. The Liar is beating us), so it'd be great for the BRO's transmission. I'm thinking it's electronic or something.

It'd make us light enough for either turrets or better living space. I'd really prefer turrets, though we might want to test whether we can fire a steam cannon at all. Might require an artillery subclass (which nobody probably has).

>>32701445
>>32701407
...Yep, really going t o need to power up that tank of ours.

File: kv_4_mik_armament_propositions.jpg (125 KB, 779x1026)

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Also, a few armament configuration mockups that were designed for Mikhailov's proposal.

>>32701499

Mmmmmmmm, BL-10.

>>32701472
Hey, couldn't the Lander girl get that as a subclass?
I mean, they can get an Adventurer subclass, after all.
Also,let's check what sort of buffs we can get first, before we decide on how to rebuild it.
Thorough checking on that can prove vital on the long journey ahead.

File: st-II.jpg (37 KB, 573x317)

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And for added measure, a render of the proposed ST-II design.

>>32701519
That was due to world class magic though and it hasn't happened yet

TinyShepherd, be honest, did you think we were going to be such fans of the steam landship idea when it first came up?

>>32701519
I doubt a lander who isn't in the military has an artillery subclass.

She could get it, somehow, I guess. Maybe landers can learn how to do things and thus get subclasses that support what they know while Adventurers are limited by their levels.

So... maybe we should try to get Aideen to fire a test steam cannon a few times. Maybe she'll pick up the skill. But remember, she can't respawn, so being a gunner is pretty risky.

>>32701472
>whatever's powering Lilac's car

I'd assume it's some form of electrical generator relying on either magic or a bound spirit or whatever. Which we should totally use, by the way. Get a Sigilmancer to pull some weird bullshit and make us a tesla-mobile with magitech engines.

>>32701561
Probably not worth it then...
Don't want our bro to lose his love interest.

>>32701561
Our pirate bro is a pirate... you'd think he'd have something to help with shooting big cannons at enemies.
Or maybe if we can power up the metal of the whole tank, that could work?

>>32701592
Yeah, but she'll be in danger anyway since we basically attract unholy abominations like moths to a flame.

I'd ask why we're popular among eldritch evil raid bosses, but I'm afriad TinyShepherd would give me an answer to that question.

So really, it doesn't matter if she's gunner or the friggin dishwasher. She's Coyote bait no matter what.

about to go to bed with a migraine, can someone make sure that we check if Takeshi's feeding BRO our enemies does anything?

>>32701664
>Believing Takeshi's weaboo nonsense.

Anon, go to sleep already.

>>32701664
It doesn't. It's either a cursed map or Aideen.

>>32701687
What, everyone got a cursed map?

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>>32701687
What map? I didn't see a map in your inventory. I wonder where it went. It's not like it can just get up and walk, right?


Still writing.

>>32701645
We seriously need to power up our tank for when we're heading out again.

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>>32701739
Grinning Man a shit.

>>32701739
Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck we should've rechecked our path.

>>32701739
What, no, fuck.

>>32701776
That fucking cat is also going this route.

>>32701773
This picture will have much use in the future. Thank you.

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>>32701804
So long as he has the personality and mannerisms of Teddy Roosevelt.

>>32701645
>Yeah, but she'll be in danger anyway since we basically attract unholy abominations like moths to a flame.
Yeah, I'm not a big fan of eldritch abominations...

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>>32701833
You have shit taste then.

>>32701686
Well, I was half asleep when I had the idea.

Don't forget to archive the thread, I usually do it.

>>32701854
I am here for levers, steam landships and Judi.
Seriously though, TinyShepherd, we leveled up some from making this thing right?

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>>32701804
EVERY THREAD IS MORE PARANOIA

I know a good portion of it is lies, too, you bastard.

>>32701902
You're a level 45 Engineer now.

Congratulations!

Still writing.

>>32701939
Hooray!

>>32701854
seriously though where is this from, chicks with animal ears are my fetish

>>32701939
What's our cultist level?

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>>32701956
You're kidding ,right?

It's Spice and Wolf. Go watch it.

>>32701969
Don't encourage him to feed our paranoia!

>>32701956
I think that's Holo, from Spice and Wolf. It's a good series for CAPITALISM, HO!

>>32701969
>What's our cultist level?

Ambrosis: 1 (Machine God)

Trove: 10 (The Great Yo Ho)

Canis: 0 (Unaffiliated)

Takeshi: 1 (Samurai Spirit)

Judicature: 20 (Justice)

Lilac: 0 (Unaffiliated)

Aideen: 100 (Luxian)

Tabula: 0 (Unaffiliated)

Unless I'm a liar.

>>32702076
Canis can worship the Coyote goddess.

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>>32700980
You look to the noon sky for a moment, and then turn to the crew on deck. “I'm going to go get some sleep.” You say, “Wake me up if Judi needs to switch places.”

“Okay.” Canis responds. The rest simply nod to your command.

You go into the small cabin, dive into the bed, and close your eyes. You soon fall asleep to the white noise of tank treads moving.

You dream of times long ago.

“Can I play!?” You younger brother shouts, bouncing up and down next to your chair.

You were about to play some D&D with your best friends, but your brother somehow found out. He simply can't understand the seriousness of D&D.

“I can play this guy!” He holds up a pre-made character sheet, which was the wrong edition. Long ago, before the divorce, you and your father used to play an old OD&D boxset with a big red dragon in the front. It just so happens that your brother had taken your character from the box. Peregrine: Human Paladin in big red letters shone at the top of the sheet. “So can I play?” Your brother continues to bounce up and down.

“No.” You respond.

“Why noooooot!?”

“Because we already have a paladin.” You point to Eric.

“But I wanna plaaaaay!”

“Then you can be this guy.” You hand him a small figurine of a peasant.

“But he has no weapons or armor!”

“He's a monk.” You explain, “He doesn't need weapons or armor. He's that cool.”

Your brother's eyes widen. “Wooooooaaaaah....”

He went to work creating stats for his character.

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>>32702433
“That was the best campaign ever!” Your brother shouted at the end, bouncing up and down in his own chair. Almost died three times and at one point tried to jump into a dragon's mouth; how the hell was he enjoying himself!?

“It would have been better if you didn't keep messing up.” You respond.

His bouncing enthusiasm is gone. “Oh.” He responds. “I'm sorry.”

“You can't just do whatever you want! You have to think about the consequences! You have to get good!”

“Okay.” He says in a defeated tone.

You sigh. Not sure what else to say.

“Hey.” He says with a grin, “Wouldn't it be funny if I died?”

His grin slowly takes over his face.

“It would be funny, wouldn't it?” He continues.

The image becomes intense and painful, like a bright light being shone in your brain.

You wake up. Your heart is pumping. You feel cold and sweaty. Your hands are shaking. You look outside. It's night.

“So, it's pretty simple, really.” You hear Lilac say. A bright light flashes outside. “The engine is turned by the- Oh. Thank you.” She pauses. “Wow. Didn't expect that.”

[ ] Continue to listen.
[ ] Burst out of the door and demand Lilac leave the ship!
[ ] Calmly go out of the room and converse.

Haha! Wrong picture!

>>32702470
>[ ] Continue to listen.

>>32702470
>[ ] Burst out of the door and demand Lilac leave the ship!
BEGONE HEATHEN, OUT OUT OUT

So, when we're done with the race...
We need to set up work on the landship, we'll need to do tests to know what all our abilities might be able to do for it aaaand we also need to stock up on all types of resources we need for a trip to the Big Apple.
...Looked at this way, we really do need to win this race

>>32702470
>Continue to listen

>>32702470
>[ ] Calmly go out of the room and converse.

>>32702470
>[x] Continue to listen.

>>32702470
[ ] Calmly go out of the room and converse

>>32702470
Goddammit we need to do something so we don't have these fucking nightmares.

>>32702470
>[X] Calmly go out of the room and converse.
We're still friends, damn it.

>>32702470
>[ ] Calmly go out of the room and continue to listen.

>>32702470
>[ ] Burst out of the door and demand Lilac leave the ship!
Lilac a shit.

>>32702470
>[ ] Calmly go out of the room and converse.

>>32702470
>[ ] Calmly go out of the room and converse.

>>32702470
>[X] Calmly go out of the room and converse.

Don't want to piss off the girl who's going to be fuelling the tank after this is all said and done.

>>32702470
[X] Ask why in the rusty hell we stopped.
What kind of crew stops in the middle of a race.

>>32702668
With what, her tears?

We need a useful class like a summoner, not her.

>>32702615
Dude, we need her after this is over.
What's the point in pissing her off?

>>32702628
>>32702589
>>32702566
>>32702556
>>32702668
[+1 Jolly Cooperation]
[+1 Conversation]

>>32702710
>need

No, we don't.

>>32702702
Well we don't HAVE a summoner, so we're going to need her.
And, frankly, she's shown she can b uild some decent stuff with her vehicle, so if we can get her help in improving BRO, we should be good.

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>>32702720
Praise the Spun!

>>32702743
ITT: Lilacfags become even more braindead than normal.

>>32702743

...She isn't a Summoner.

If anything, we need Tabula.

>>32702743
She's a sorcerer. Still useful though.

Also, we should definitely convince Tabula to stick around. A Lvl 90 summoner is just the thing to help keep the MiB or Coyote from ripping us a new shithole.

>>32702769
Fuck that I'm in favor of Judi.
But Lily is the only one who could bring about water or fire for our engine.

>>32702743
Lilac is a sorcerer.

>>32702866
She. Is. Not. A. Summoner.

Jesus christ you're retarded.

>>32702812
Seems unlikely he'd agree...
He's in another guild, he's level 90, and he doesn't really owe us anything.
If anything, we need to start learning how to fight like a team, and do some grinding.

>>32702890
Oh fuck off, we know that Log Horizon has overskills now, so she's our best bet at getting someone that can create water or fire.

>>32702939
Is this the point where we just start pointing and laughing? Cause I'm pointing and laughing.

>>32702977
>>32702939
>>32702899
>>32702890
>>32702877
Guys. Calm down.

She's a sorcerer, so, no, she has no water spells, BUT she does have ice spells, should she decide to pick those up.

Ice + fire = water.
Water + fire = steam.

It's not that hard, guys. It's basic spell combos. She fills the boiler with ice, then heats the boiler with fire spells.

Now, will she have the MP to do this a lot? Probably not. The summoner had the benefit of being able to power a ship just by having a fire elemental summoned, not necessarily having the summon actually do anything, allowing him to conserve MP. Sorcerers do not have this luxury.

I'm sure you guys will think of something though.

>>32702977
Fine, whatever, fuck...
We'll obviously just wish really hard and the steam engine will keep working when we need to move all the way to the big apple.

>>32703069
>wish really hard
Otherwise known as trusting lilac.

>>32703068
Turning ice to water, then water to steam is far too inefficient to run our gigantic steam tank.

I think it's much better to convince Tabula that we're going places, and to stick around with us.

Failing that, we get another summoner. Summoners are badass.

>>32703126
Wouldn't say no towards getting a summoner, personally...

...Why do we have such goddamn creepy dreams?

>>32703279
Cause we're already MiB's meatpuppet. We just think we have free will.

>>32703279
We are playing a cleric who hears voices and refuses to admit that he does. He is also actively trying to make others hear the voices too.

Man our brother better fucking appreciate all we're doing to get him back...

>>32703338
Yes, what with us moving in the opposite direction.

>>32703287
Sorry man, TinyShepherd has already used up all my paranoia for the thread.

>Man our brother better fucking appreciate all we're doing to get him back...
>Currently moving in the OPPOSITE DIRECTION

It's a work in progress!
We'll get to him eventually!

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>>32703338
The dead appreciate very little.

Just Kidding!

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>>32703416
FalseTinyShepherd pls

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>>32702720
You calmly walk out of the room.

You see Lilac and Judi sitting down on the steel silk cloth, eating from a plate of strange fruit.

“So, the engine uses magnets which flip their poles by changing which side of the coil has the electrons flowing in and-” Lilac spots you. She give you a small wave. “I didn't wake you, did I?”

“No, no.” You respond. “I was just... Doesn't matter.” You look to Judicature. “Why are we stopped?”

“We're both recharging.” Lilac says. She waves her staff around and another flash of lightning appears.

The duelist nods in agreement.

You look up to see the water sprite filling up the boiler with a stream of water.

“Ah. I see.” You say, “So, what were you saying about magnets?

“I'm not sure if I should tell you,” Lilac says, “I don't want you stealing my ideas!” She smiles and points to you.

You do not smile back.

She frowns. “Well, I thought it was funny.”

The let out the slightest chuckle at the phrase.

She smiles at your chuckle. Then she puts on a serious face. “So, I've been thinking of something.” She says, “Coyote showed up at the mansion right?”

“And destroyed the best quest ever!” Judi shouts.

Lilac puts up both hands to signal to the duelist to calm down. “Yes, he did that.” She then looks back to you. “But monsters aren't supposed to be able to enter into the mansion's area.”

“So?” You respond.

>>32704179
“Soooo, Coyote CAN enter there. If Coyote can enter there, he could probably go anywhere, including towns, like Ekechi.”

“Why would Coyote be able to do that?”

“Well, Coyote wasn't programmed very well, from what I've heard. He was originally programmed under the idea that he instantly kills anyone he comes into contact with. In fact, did you know what happened when Coyote was killed back in open beta?”

“How did anyone kill Coyote!?”

“Then entire server was there. It was an impromptu event, and- it doesn't matter. What matters is that when that happened Coyote didn't even have anything programmed for when he died. It crashed the server. They supposedly fixed that, but what if other things are missing? What if the can't-enter-here part of the program was never made?”

“I feel like Coyote would just belong to a monster class that is banned from entering a city. It's not like they have a completely different class for raid bosses or something, I mean, really they should all be apart of the character class, which then breaks off into character, NPC, and monster subclasses, and then all the different subclasses of those subclasses.”

“I guess that makes sense.” Lilac responds.

“I have no idea what's going on.” Judicature responds, “But isn't Coyote a shape shifter like Loki? If he takes on the form of a person, doesn't the... no-can-enter-program say, 'Oh it's a human, better let him in!'?”

You think about this for a while. “So, what do you want to do?” You say to Lilac.

“I guess what I'm trying to say is.” She pauses. “If things look bad, we should just forget the race and leave. Okay?”

[ ] I won't fall for this trick!
[ ] Sounds legit.
[ ] Other.

>>32704199
>[ ] Sounds legit.

Rolled 9

>>32704199
>[ ] Sounds legit.

>>32704199
>[ ] Sounds legit.
Really don't want to get killed by Coyote.

>>32704199
>[ ] Other.

Surely, BRO can take on the Coyote and live to survive another day.

We'll take it one step at a time.

>>32704199
Wait, shouldn't Royal Guards be able to spot something?

>>32704199
How the hell do you change which coil side has electrons reliably?

>>32704351
Magic.

>>32704199
[ ] I won't fall for this trick!

Wasn't Lilac the one who wanted to race?

>>32704199
>[ ] Sounds legit.
But we're totally making a magnet-steam tank after this

>>32704351
Miracles

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Seriously. Guys. She's Coyote.

Coyote is the Liar.

>>32704450
Magnet Steam Tank with rockets or something.

>>32704179
>>32704199
"No I have obligations to fulfill. We outrode that furfag once, we'll do it again."

>>32704470
So, what, Coyote built a magnet tank solely to sneak close to us?

>>32704199
>[ ] Sounds legit.

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>>32704497
No, Coyote ate Lilac and stole her shit.

Coyote did nothing wrong, basically. Let's get that prize money and hit the road.

>>32704450
>>32704274
>>32704268
>>32704232
>>32704504
[+1 Agreement]
[+1 Trust]
[+1 Lied To]

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>>32704521
TOLD. YOU.

man you guys fucking suck
and our new pet elf is gunna be pissed

>>32704521
second she recharges unload everything on the bitch

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>>32704521

TinyShepherd pls

>>32704565
No kidding.

But hopefully we're not ditching now because Coyote has yet to show up (officially) during the race.

If we see Coyote, then we'll drop out. But not before.

>>32701407
What? and wait a whole YEAR?

>>32704199
>>32704179
I'm suddenly reminded of the times where a monster the devs dont expect to be killed is finally beaten after some grueling fight and it turns out they never made a loot table because it wasn't supposed to die.

Now I'm not sure about this but we're probably already halfway so no use in stopping. Better to just agree to teamup. if something goes wrong and require two people to sound the alarm incase one is coyote

>>32704521
God damn it. We're totally gonna PK her for this shit later.

Why would Coyote tell us that we should run from Coyote in case something wrong happens?
If anything, there should be talk on how we should totally risk it and all that if Lilac is Coyote.

Also, Lilac is an adventurer - if she gets killed, she gets back to the city.
Which, you know, would be likely to lead to her frantically calling us and revealing this is coyote.

>>32704199
>“I guess what I'm trying to say is.” She pauses. “If things look bad, we should just forget the race and leave. Okay?”
I like both girls, but Lilac's Death Flag is set, right there.

>>32704351
You spin it aka attach the equipment to a wheel if i remember properly?.
Alternatively she just used a tiny steam engine for more efficiency.

>>32704632
That's fine.
We'll go with the older woman.
Here we come, Judi!

>>32704533
You do know her deal is basically that she's traveling with us, right?
If she lies here, it's extremely unlikely we'd trust her afterwards.

>>32704645

Wasn't Judi the younger one?

Unless she was lying about her age

>>32704662
I dunno, I'd expect Coyote to be sneaky and shit. It's in her nature. It'd be like yelling at a dog for sniffing another's butt.

But I think we can come to an arrangement with Coyote. If TinyShep is to be believed, Coyote is all in it for the XP and our tanks can provide that.

>>32704701
>Cutting a deal with a psychopathic killing machine to give him better weapons
Yes, this can only end well.

>>32704673
Judi is the one that talks about how she's upset that we don't know the movies she's seen.
She'd almost have to be older than us.

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>>32704723
If someone important to you died and you had the chance to bring them back, wouldn't you do anything to make it happen?

Coyote did nothing wrong, has done nothing wrong, and will continue to do nothing wrong. We just need to give her a positive outlet to achieve her goals.

Also, I really want to see MiB vs. Coyote shenanigans.

>>32704797
>They go off-screen
>They come back and they're dating
End of the world is nigh.

>>32704797
Please tell me you're not planning on trying to romance Coyote.

>>32704797
>vs. Coyote shenanigans.
Then you came to the right thread.

>>32704797
If you want to date a monster, try and find a Genius one and go with that.

>>32704823
No, I'm a Judifag and really Coyote is doing this to bring back the First Man.

So Coyote is taken. Sad but true. First Man is a lucky... man...

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>>32704797
Mass murder is certainly not wrong. Hundreds of lives for one is totally ok. Please continue with this train of thought.

>>32704797
>Coyote did nothing wrong, has done nothing wrong, and will continue to do nothing wrong.
Except for trying to kill us, sure.

It's like you're trying to fuck a bear that has rabies.

>>32704990
She wants XP. Convince Coyote to kill shit tons of goblins like everyone else.

Killing landers and Adventuers just encourages level 90 Adventurers to gang up on Coyote and unlike the game, once Coyote is dead that's it.

>>32705005
Oh come on now.A condom is enough protection for that right?

>>32705005
>he doesn't actively fuck diseased animals
Is this the face of the new generation?

>>32705067
Do they make heart condoms?

>>32705048
You forget that Coyote has the sun and moon. They can create and end life as they see fit.

>>32705243
And we have knowledge of a land where her entire world is but a story made for a game. If our character was halfway clever (which he isn't) we'd just point out that from an adventurer's perspective Coyote could just try to find a way to send us back and the returned people could convince a programmer to bring back the first man.

>>32705722
But Anon, this IS the "revive the First Man" quest.

We're doing it. Right now.

We done for the night?

>>32705930
I'm expecting a ruse cruise.

>>32705930
No, he always announces the end of the session.

This next is probably going to be the last post, though.

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>>32704521
“Okay.” You hold out your hand. “It's a promise.”

The two of you shake hands.

“We're ready!” Tabula calls out.

Lilac gets to her feet. “Find me when you get to the finish line.” She smiles and points to you as she walks away.

You do the same to her, “It'll be tough to find you from the first place stage!” You bring two fingers close together. “Too small. Too small.”

“Ooooooh~!” Judicature shouts, “Shots fired!”

You and Lilac share a smile at Judi's comment.

The duelist pokes you. “Your turn to drive.”

You stand tall, or at least as tall as you can on the unstable, cloth flooring, and make your way to the driver seat. “Ignite the engine!” You command.

“Way ahead of you!” Tabula calls back.

You close the door and you can hear the sound of the pipes filling with steam and then the sound of door open behind you.

“I think I'll stay awake.” Comes the voice of Judicature. “If I go to sleep now I might miss the end of the race.”

You turn to see the duelist sitting down on the floor next to you, then a flash from, presumably another strike of lightning.

“How long does it take her charge that thing?” You ask.

“She said she's trying to keep the water from being electrolyzed,” Judi explains, “So she has to be extra careful.”

You push the levers forward. “So, how does her car even work?”

>>32706067
“I... I don't know.” She gives you an unsure look, “Most of it went over my head after she said something about lead.”

“Lead? Why would she have lead in there?”

“I... I don't know. Lead's so weird, right? What a weird metal. What is it even good for?”

You stare at Judi for a while. “You're just not telling me how it works, aren't you.”

She looks away from you and mumbles, “I promised her I wouldn't tell you, so I can't until she tells me I can.”

You roll your eyes. “Fine. I should be focusing on catching up to that cat anyways.”

“What cat?”

“TopCat. The guy on the bike.”

“Oh, we already passed him a while ago. He fell off his bike.”

“So...” You couldn't keep the smile away, “We're in first!?”

“Oh, I guess we are.”

“WE'RE IN FIRST! WE'RE GONNA WIN THIS BITCH!”

“Yay!”

“FIRST!”

“First!”

“AHHHHH I AM SO HYPED!”

“Wooo!”

And that hype stays with you all the way into the dawn.

“Are we there yet?” Judicature asks.

“Almost.” You respond, “But you can see it. We're almost there.” You point to the horizon and the top of a destroyed airliner.

“Are... are we going to win!?”

“I think we are.”

“No...”

“Yes! We're gonna win!”

“I don't believe it.”

The door slams open. “Yarr, Lilac off the port quarter, capn'!”

“Which... Which direction is that?”

Trove point to the back left of the ship.

“Is she catching up?” You ask.

“Yarr, she be far faster than we be.” Trove responds.

“Aaaaaagh!” You try to push the levers even further forward, even though you know it does nothing.

You look out the window. You can see her slowly pulling ahead.

“FUUUUUUUUUUUCK!” You complain.

A huge red light. Red strings erupt from the city of Ekechi.

[ ] Stop
[ ] Win this thing
[ ] Wait for Lilac to stop before stopping.
[ ] Other.

>>32706083
>[ ] Win this thing

PRIZE.
MONEY.

>>32706083
>“WE'RE IN FIRST! WE'RE GONNA WIN THIS BITCH!”
What about GodKingFluffles, long may he reign?

>>32706083
[X] Win this thing
I'm coming to free you of your fleshy prison C man. Ram that fucker.

>>32706083
>[ ] Win this thing

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>>32706125

>>32706083
>A huge red light. Red strings erupt from the city of Ekechi.
>[X] Contact Lilac.
She has to be on our friends list, right? We can talk this thing out.

>>32706083
>[X] Wait for Lilac to stop before stopping.

>>32706146
This. Talk to her.

>>32706125
He's the guy who crashed into the mountain. That's why he was in a ring of fire. He flicked you off and everything.

>>32706083
>[ ] Wait for Lilac to stop before stopping.
I feel something bad's going to happen if we win.

>>32706156
I mean, that shit can't be good, right?

>>32706083
reapply HOLY FLAMES

>>32706083
>[X] Win this thing
The only other option is losing.
Ramming Speed

>>32706083
>[ ] Win this thing

>>32706083
>[x ] Wait for Lilac to stop before stopping.

>>32706167
Welp.
I'm dumb.

>>32706180
To everything including ourselves right?

>>32706083
>[ ] Stop

Uuuuuh...

>>32706083
>[ ] Win this thing

We are going to be filthy fucking rich! And that's the best kind of rich!

Remind me again why we're playing red light-green light with Lilac?

All I see is us promising to bug out of the race IF Coyote shows up.

>>32706244
We're gonna die! The good looking answer is never the right answer!

>>32706267
We're going to dye rich. Which is the right way to die.

>>32706262
They could either be happy celebration red strings, or rapey eldritch red tentacles.

From past experiences in this quest, they're much, much more likely to be the latter.

Plenty of people are getting pretty bad vibes from this.

>>32706083
[x] fire everything we have in the general direction of ekechi

>>32706083
>[X] Win this thing

>>32706317
If so, it's too coincidental. Why would Lilac just so happen to know about the Coyote infiltrating Area 51 right before it mattered?

Wouldn't she have mentioned it earlier?

>>32706318
seems like a good plan

>>32706108
>>32706129
>>32706133
>>32706190
>>32706206
>>32706244

[?? ?????????? ???? ?????]
[?? ?????????? ???? ??????????]
[???? ??? ????, ????]

>>32706310
We won't even see the money! Be merciful TinyShepherd, please.

>>32706345
-1 rep with everyone confirmed.

>>32706351

Live by the BRO, die by the BRO

>>32706318
as long as we can do it while moving, this

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>>32706351
There is no mercy, only happy, lovely people who will end you and everything you love.

>>32706345

I hope you have lube gentlemen.

>>32706345
So -x reputation with Lilac
Theres another reputation in there.
And that last one with a comma I have no idea.

Remember we agreed to a fair race BEFORE the race started.

And "if things get bad" is a very ambiguous clause.

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>>32706345
The last time question marks came up like that, our brother murdered someone.

>>32706418
Coyote always wins over peoples' hearts.

>>32706469
Hearts and minds.

>>32706516
And bodies.
And souls.

>>32706578
Really when the C man decides to reach inside there is nothing that can be done.

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>>32706578

>>32706626
>started watching the show
>her personality annoys me to end
>dropped

>>32706712
Really? How so?

Just wait till you get to the economics.

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>>32706345
“Full speed ahead!” You shout. You are already going full speed, but you felt the need to yell it. “GET US MORE STEAM!”

“Aye aye, capn'!” The pirate responds, closing the door behind him.

“Wait!” Judicature shouts, “Look! The red threads! It has to be Coyote! We need to stop!”

You do not budge.

“What are you doing!?” The Morning Star shouts, “We promised we'd stop!”

“I LIED!” You scream.

No one is going to take this victory from you. Not Lilac, not TopCat, not Coyote. No one!

You look over to where you could see Lilac. She was slightly behind you. She flings open the hood of her car revealing what looks like a bunch of blocks with wires sticking out. She starts pulling out the wires and rearranging them. She's falling behind you. You were going to win!

A flash of lightning.

The chrome car reaches a horrific speed.

Another flash.

The thing bursts into flames, but gains even more speed.

She's ahead of you.

The flames reach her. Red numbers begin to tick away at her. Her HP bar is slowly dropping.

This was no longer a race against her, it was her speed against her HP.

Her mouth opens. You can only assume she is screaming as she reaches the city gates.

Aflame, her rage almost tangible, she stands atop her burning wreck and holds up two middle fingers to you and the BRO. She screams something, but you can't hear it. Then she falls backwards, her HP has reached 0.

The BRO slows down to a crawl and stops at the gate.

You put your head in your hands.

You lost.

[ ] Revive Lilac.
[ ] She can rez at the Cathedral.
[ ] Other.

>>32706896
>[X] Revive Lilac
Any other answer is wrong

>>32706896
FUCKING SHIT NIGGERS, I TOLD YOU YOU SHOULD HAVE LISTENED!

>[ ] Revive Lilac.

>>32706896
>“What are you doing!?” The Morning Star shouts, “We promised we'd stop!”

I don't understand this.

We promised we'd bug out when we saw Coyote. We never said stop. At least, I can't find that part.

[ ] Revive Lilac.

>>32706896
[X] Offer the body to Coyote.
To the victor go the greatest honors.