>>32554593
“Welcome, racers, to the first Engineering League Race!” LastDerogation announces, “When we were first trapped in this world, I, like you, felt fear, but then I heard the story of a strange man who made a glider out of a chair and some cloth. At first I thought it was simply a ruse till I saw someone make a paper airplane. That is when I understood a greater implication. The implication of travel! No doubt some of you may wonder what is the point of this when we are able to get out of here any day now, but time here is slowed down! If it takes the real world a year to figure out how to get us out of the game, twenty four of our years will have passed!”

A murmur goes throughout the crowd that had gathered to see the spectacle of the race.

“With that being said,” The elf continued, “I am sure everyone now understands the importance of travel, and with such an understanding, I will hope that you will give great respect to these great teams of engineers!” He holds a hand out, and a mustached, human gentleman known as Bottomsworth, also of <49erS> hands over a piece of paper.

“Now, let me introduce our racers!” He shouts to the crowd. “They're thoughtful! They're light red! Give it up for ThinkPink in the Courtesan!”

The pink afros begin to jump up and down like wild animals doing some kind of strange ritual. “Think pink! Think pink! Think pink!” They shout to the crowd.

The crowd responds in kind. “Think pink! Think pink! Think pink!”

“These next three need no introduction, but we're going to give it to them anyways! It's the Swag Brothers in the Swagtastic Swagmachine!”

“SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG SWAG!” They shout, refusing to be outdone by the pink afros. At least, that is your assumption.

“Next is the grumpiest cat you've ever seen! GOD. KING. FLUUUUUUFFLES!”

Unlike the audience, the were-cat does not seem amused.

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The most exciting time of the week has finally arrived!

>>32554615
“The next team is also comprised of cats, but their leader wears a hat! Give it up for the Top Crew and their vehicle the Big Gear!”

TopCat simply folds his arms and says nothing. The crowd goes wild for some reason.

“Now let's give a warm welcoming to a group new to boulder! The First Panzer Division and their Big Red One!”

The crowd cheers, but not as hard as they did for the other teams. They must be too afraid of you. That is how you justify it.

“And our last contestant! The Geneva's Alchemist in M!” Derogation looks down at the piece of paper, and then to Frankenstien and Emm, who both have their hands up the their mouths giggling. Derogation looks to the left of them. Then to the right of them. Then directly at them. “Is this a sex pun?”

The two simply continue to giggle.

Out of the corner of your eye you notice Lilac place her hands upon her palms.

Derogation turns back to the starting line. “Racers, start your engines!”

You go down below deck. “Start the fire!” You shout to Tabula.

He summons up a fire elemental which begins to vomit flame into the boiler.

You head back up on deck. That is when the plain girl. Only now do you notice her name is Aideen. How strange.

“Do we have a map?” Aideen ask.

“Maaaaaap...” You say, smacking your own head. You knew you forgot something.

“Three!” Shouts Derogation.

“Shouldn't we have a map?” Aideen questions, “Those are important, right?”

“Two!”

“I guess?” You respond, “I mean, we could go get one, but-”

“One!”

[ ] Go get a map and get back to the BRO as quickly as possible.
[ ] Fuck maps! Full speed ahead!
[ ] Other

>>32554634
[ ] Go get a map and get back to the BRO as quickly as possible.

We need a map. Seriously bad.

>>32554634
>[X] Go get a map and get back to the BRO as quickly as possible.

>I heard the story of a strange man who made a glider out of a chair and some cloth
awww yeah, we're awesome

>>32554634
"THE CHAIR WAS AWESOME AND SYMBOLOGY STILL ISN'T A GODDAMN WORD."

Any speculation on what Aideen's class and subclass will be?

>>32554681
>>32554643
>>32554882
Combine these into one, except send someone ELSE to go get the map while we distract the gunner and the audience with nonsense.

>>32554918
An excellent idea. Maybe get into an argument with somebody.

>>32554643
>>32554681

>>32554918
>>32554933

Looks like it's 2 to 2?

Dice Gods!

1) Get that map
2) Distraction and madness

>>32555031
No, I support distraction as well as getiting the map

>>32555031
apparently the dice gods are tied as well

Rolled 1

>>32555031
Son of a bitch.

>>32555060
Fuck you dice gods.

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>>32555060
>no distractions

Rolled 2

>>32555060
“Go!” Derogation shouts.

The vehicles all come to life. ThinkPink are first out the gate, followed by Lilac, then the Swagbros, TopCat, and finally the BRO. The garbage can seems to be going nowhere and its pilot shoot you and the rest of the racers the bird.

You leap off the side of the land-ships. “Just go! I'll catch up!”

You hear an enormous explosion behind you and you turn around to see a giant crater where the garbage can was. You look up in the air to see it and the were-cat rocketing upwards, quite literally. The wings on the side suddenly expand and it starts shooting off towards Ekechi 51, you think.

You can't be distracted by that now, you have a mission!

You go running through the streets of boulder looking everywhere you can for a shop selling maps. There has to be one somewhere!

“Maps!” You shout, “Anyone have maps!? Do you have a map? Do YOU have a map? How about you!? MAPS!?”

“I have maps...” A decrepit old man says behind a stall. “What kind of map... are you looking for?”

“Map of the area between here and Ekechi 51! Its really important! You need to hurry!”

“O... kay!” He starts looking through papers. “Let's … see...” He thumbs through some more. “Ekechi... 51?”

“Yes! Ekechi 51! Please hurry!”

“Let's see here...” He begins to move his tounge around in his mouth, making slapping sounds, “Is this what you're looking for?” He holds out a large map with detailed markings of paths, rivers, and mountains.

“Yes! How much is it!?”

“I'll give it to ya for...” He begins to ponder.

And ponder.

And ponder.

And ponder.

You grow furious. “FOR HOW MUCH!?”

“Five hundred gold.”

“DONE!” You reach into your inventory only to realize you don't have enough.

[ ] Plead with the old man.
[ ] Make a deal.
[ ] Steal the map.
[ ] Other.

>>32555409
>[ ] Steal the map.
Fuck this guy's shit. We need that map NOW.

>>32555409
>[ ] Make a deal.

I.O.U

>>32555409
>[X] Make a deal.

>>32555409
[ ] Steal the map.

THERE IS NO TIME.

>>32555409
>[X] Make a deal.

Rolled 1

>>32555466
>>32555527

>>32555469
>>32555491

Dice Gods! Do not disappoint!

1)Theft
2)Deal

>>32555690
YES

>>32555690
2

WHEELIN' N DEALIN'

>>32555690

Welp, at least no one's going to fuck with a guy in a tank

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Round Half Alvs, watch yourselves.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QPntjTPWgKE

>>32555690
...I'm sure Judi is gonna be real happy about this if she finds out.

>>32555773
>if she finds out

Key word.

Who is going to tell her? MiB?

Rolled 2

>>32555789
No one will tell her.

Still writing.

>>32555773

We'll pay off the old man with interest later after the race

Probably

We won't

>>32555810
GODDAMN IT NO ONE.

We're sacrificing him to Coyote!

Which reminds me, what God are we the cleric of?

>>32555832
I don't think it matters, but we obviously should worship the Omnisiah

>>32555905
Let's make that official, even if my vote is to start worshiping Coyote.

But we could worship the Omnissiah and Coyote. Pantheons make things so much easier.

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>>32555690
You don't have time for this shit! You snatch the map out of his hand and start sprinting for the stables. You look behind you to see the old man's reaction and all he does is grin at you with a toothy, broken smile. Something about it is quite unnerving, but you don't have time to think about it.

You burst into the stables and jump onto your cart and force the horses to sprint as fast as they can. The first part of the race has a winding road and BRO is terrible at turning, so you should be able to catch up, maybe.

You push the horses harder and harder until you see the BRO chugging along the road, certainly not going its maximum speed, but it is starting to pick up speed.

You drive the cart up to the ladder and jump for it, grabbing on. The horses and cart slowly stop as you speed past them. You begin to climb the ladder until you reach the top. “I have the map!” You shout victoriously.

You open up the map.

Right now you are early in the race and there are many bends and turns trying to get through the mountains. You'll need to plan this first part out carefully.

[ ] Set course for the longest straightaway.
[ ] Set course for the shortest path.
[ ] Set course for a body of water.
[ ] Other.

>>32556109
>You don't have time for this shit! You snatch the map out of his hand and start sprinting for the stables. You look behind you to see the old man's reaction and all he does is grin at you with a toothy, broken smile. Something about it is quite unnerving, but you don't have time to think about it.

GOD DAMN IT

>>32556125
And then old man was Coyote.

>>32556109
>[ ] Set course for the longest straightaway.

Our strength is maniac speed, we don't want to get bogged down in narrow paths considering how HUGE our tank is

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>>32556109
[ ] Set course for the longest straightaway.

>>32556149
If this is the case, then I'm okay with it, because I like Coyote and want to help him/her remake the First Man.

>>32556109
the straightaway, as long as its on the way enough

>>32556109

I know that we are using water elementals, but do we have a sufficient stock of mana potions?

Would going near a body of water even help with that problem?

>>32556109
>[ ] Set course for the longest straightaway.
Our strong point is speed, and I doubt we can take turns well.

>>32556109
>[ ] Set course for the longest straightaway.

>>32556157
>>32556180
>>32556249
>>32556269
>>32556175

[+1 Mad Cackling]
[+1 Dynamic Entry]

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>>32556318
You close the map. “Everyone hold onto something!”

Everyone grabs hold of the side of the land-boat, except Takeshi. “The samurai code tells us that with enough skill, nothing can shake your balance.”

Part of you wants to slap him. Another part wants to call him an idiot. Unfortunately, the winning part is the part screaming Ain't nobody got time for this shit!

You open the door to the driver's room. “You see that turn up ahead?”

Judicature stares at the upcoming turn. “Yes.”

“Ignore it! Keep heading forward!”

“But then we'll fall off!”

“The road loops around. We're making a shortcut.”

“Don't you mean TAKING a shortcut?”

“FULL SPEED AHEAD!”

Judi pushes both levers forward and the machine begins to pick up speed.

You shout, “HANG ON!”

You can't help but laugh at the madness you are attempting. Over the side goes the tank. It zooms down the side of the mountain, hits the next road and goes airborne as it flies off that road as well. It hits the ground with a terrible crash and lands next to a certain four-wheeled four-man vehicle. The speed returns to the machine and it begins to slowly pass Think Pink, then it begins to not-so-slowly leave them in the dust, quite literally.

You are now no longer last.

You look back at the map again. You will soon be in the Mojave, but for right now things look like clear sailing.

You turn around to see Takeshi exactly where he was standing when you last talked to him, making a faux-Buddhist/faux-magic pose. What a weeaboo.

[ ] Go get some well deserved sleep.
[ ] Go call your brother to see what he wanted.
[ ] Go make sure the ship is still in good condition.
[ ] Other.

>>32556646
>[ ] Go call your brother to see what he wanted.
>[ ] Go make sure the ship is still in good condition.
kick dat hornets nest

>>32556646
>[ ] Go make sure the ship is still in good condition.
Maintenance is important to making sure we actually win this thing. Gotta keep it going the whole time, or at least as much as possible.

>>32556646
>other
Talk to Aideen

>>32556646
>[ ] Go make sure the ship is still in good condition.

>>32556681
>>32556694
>>32556713
There only seems to be four of you right now, so I'll just take these and move on.

[+1 Exhaustion]
[-1 Ship Damage]
[+1 Mutual Bird Flipping]

There's me too. But typing on this phone of mine is slow going

>>32556886
I know that feel.

>>32556886
That's what I was doing when the quest started today. My last lecture was still going.

I wonder if our resident pirate can captain the ship for a little while so we can get some sleep.

>>32556646
I was gonna vote
>get everyone not busy to check if the map is real

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>>32557032
It's probably 90% real except in one critical area where Coyote wants us to go.

And to be honest, we can do Coyote's sidequest on the way back, so I'd rather just ignore the map when it is clearly wrong.

If we win the race, we should give a speech about how the chair-glider was awesome and that symbololgy is not a real word.

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>>32556828
The devil's work is never done, nor is yours. You go down below deck where the blinding light of a being made of fire breathing fire into metal tubes greets you. “Any trouble down here?” You ask.

“Not with the boiler.” The summoner responds, “But it sounded like something inside one of the panels bounced around.” He points to one of the panels.

You open up the panel and hear something bouncing around in the gears. You look around. The gearshift looks fine. Everything looks to be in place. What the hell could that sound be?

You lift up part of the floorboard and look down at the spinning axles. Something seems to be stuck on the one closest to you, spinning around in circles, clanging into gears and such. You time your movement and snatch the thing, ripping what seems to be some kind of long red chord. You look at the thing in your hand. A fang? The hell is this doing here? Did you run over something?

“What'd you find?” Tabula asks.

“A tooth.” You respond, “I think we hit something.”

“Let me see.” The elf holds out his hand.

You place the tooth into his palm. “I wonder if we got any xp for it.”

“Looks like a canine.” He says, “Human canine.”

“So, we ran over a wolf-fang!?”

“No, I mean.” He sighs, “I mean it's a human's canine tooth. Or humanoid, I should say. Could be anything from an elf to a goblin.”

“So what you're telling me is... We may have just PKed a random person.”

“I would prefer to believe that your driver PKed someone.”

You think about the implication for a moment. “Don't mention this to her.”

He shrugs. “Okay.”

>>32557469
>this causes Symbology to come and hunt us down

I always wonder what would have happened if we recruited her.

>>32557485
You put the panels back in place and head up to the deck.

You are still in the mountainous region, and the mighty stone giants cast a shadow on you, except for the one with a large flaming circle on it. You squint your eyes to see better and you notice a certain pink cat. He sticks his middle finger up. You lift your hand into the air and do the same. The hell is that guy's problem?

[ ] Get some sleep.
[ ] Call brother.
[ ] Talk to someone. (Specify who)
[ ] Other.

>>32556886 here.
Finally got to a comp.

>>32557512
[ ] Talk to someone. (Specify who)
Aideen. I want to know what her skillset is and if she likes ADVENTURING on our new tank.

Then
[ ] Get some sleep.

>>32557512
>[ ] Call brother.

>>32557512
>[ ] Talk to someone. (Specify who)
Judi

>>32557512
>[X] Call brother.

>human tooth
Ya no way that's not going to bite us in the ass. severally. I was assuming at first it was one of Coyote's teeth, like maybe it has thin red straits and teeth latch onto things to track it; but I doubt that now. Most likely a Lilith plant or something.

>>32557512
>Call bro
after warning Canis

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1.07 MB PNG

>>32557563
>>32557546

>>32557576
Aw Yisssssssssss.

>>32554643
How did he manage to not have an ingame map already? I guess I'm just weird because that's one of the first things i save money for in a game.

Remaining Racers:
GodKingFluffles and his garbage can with wings [snickering intensifies]
THINK PINK and their quad-cycle
Lilac (the Liar) and her Magneto Mobile
Swag Bros and their pump cart. (SWAG SWAG SWAG)


Dead and/or Unable to Finish:
Topcat and his bicycle.

That old man will come to collect when we least expect it.

>>32557512
>Call Brother

>>32557546
>>32557563
>>32557569
>>32557692

[+0 MiB]

>>32557733
This is good! I think. We've been ignoring him and need to see what's up anyways.

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>>32557749
MiniPriest has been known to lie in those posts before. TRUST NOTHING

>>32557677
The question is if GodKing Fluffles can survive the descent. Otherwise we all lost.

>>32557801
He forgot a one in front of that zero.

>>32557901
Landing is always the hardest thing to do and really I don't think he's getting anywhere unless his glider (because that's what it is) is really fucking easy to push.

>>32557979
And then Fluffles was an airline pilot with a degree in aerospace engineering.

But then we got airships.

>>32557979
Imagine if it's one of those Da Vinci hummingbird flying machines instead of a glider, that would be hilarious.

>>32558006
Fire pots make the best rocket fuel.

Still writing.

>>32558009
How do they even work?

>>32558021
they don't

>>32558019
What if you have an alchemist aboard who can make firepots on demand?

>>32558009
If it is, then we should hire him because our blitzkrieg needs some fucking blitz to it. I'm talking air support, man. He can build us helicopters.

I look forward to our post-race engineering. Lilac (if she isn't a filthy liar) can help us get some electronic gear control so the BRO becomes a bit lighter, which means we'll be able to put some turrets on it.

And maybe a helicopter landing pad too.

>>32558058
This.

You know what? Fuck finding our brother and solving the world's problems-- let's build an engineering firm and make Log Horizon's vehicles.

>>32558035
Then Imperialism happens.

>>32558088
We can do that as we travel. Slowly but surely we'll find excuses to keep building tanks and recruiting people to crew them.

We gotta figure out some way to ford the Mississippi though. That'll be fun.

>>32558098
Queen Victoria you are drunk.

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>>32557733
You wave a middle finger at the garbage-plane as its burning wreckage falls away from sight.

You yawn. You want to go get some sleep, but perhaps calling your brother before you do that would be a better idea. You open up your friend menu and hit the button to call your brother.

RING

RIN-

Silence.

He picked up. Why isn't he saying anything? “Hello?” You ask.

“I...” Comes the familiar voice of your brother. His voice did not sound like his normal happy, cursing, loudmouthed self.

“You okay?” You ask.

“No...” His voice was choppy, as if he was shivering or crying.

You think about what could upset him so much. You felt you knew the answer deep down. “King broke up with you, didn't he?” You guess. It was obvious to you in retrospect. He never shut up about how amazing King was. “Hey, there's a lot of fish out in the sea. You'll find the man for you one day.”

There is a long pause.

“You there?” You ask.

“I killed a man.”

The blood drains from you. The sudden sinking feeling staggers you. You take a step back. “What!?”

“A lander. He... He died because of me.”

You feel the eyes of everyone else on the ship. Did they know? They couldn't know, but you had to make sure they didn't find out. You open the door to the bedroom and close the door behind you. You had no idea how to respond.

“Are you still there?” He asks.

[ ] Hang up.
[ ] “How did this happen?”
[ ] “Does anyone know?”
[ ] “Where are you right now?”
[ ] Other.

>>32558132
Rocket ship carrying imperialism across the world, ferrying goblin slaves across the continents?

>>32558136
>[ ] “How did this happen?”

WHELP

>>32558136
>[ ] “How did this happen?”

>[ ] “Where are you right now?”


>[ ] “Does anyone know?”
>[ ] “Does anyone know?”
>[ ] “Does anyone know?”

>>32558136
[X] “Does anyone know?”
We can feed any witnesses to the C man. Bodies too.

>>32558136
>[ ] “How did this happen?”
>[ ] “Does anyone know?”
>[ ] “Where are you right now?”

All of the above

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>>32558136
>[ ] “How did this happen?”
>[ ] “Where are you right now?”

"Look, things were bound to go to shit because of the Databasing. Especially with the whole NPCs becoming real thing. I'm sure you're not the only one whose done it... so don't blame yourself.

Just stay safe, okay?"

Fuck you guys for not answering your phones.

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>>32558136
>[X] “How did this happen?”
We'll do a jailbreak if we have to, but we need the story first.

>>32558136
"so what? wont he just respawn?"
we know adventurers can respawn, so why would we assume landers cant?
we dont know that they perma die yet
no metagame plz

>>32558205
It is cool. He got King his protector to help him. He is in good hands.

>>32558136

"They'll respawn anyway, we just ran over someone with our badass tank. Did I tell you about our badass tank?"

>>32558230
That's true. We don't know much about landers yet.

For all we know, they're philisophical zombies.

>>32558242
He broke up with King, unfortunately. Which means no guild to support him. He's probably living at an inn right now, if he isn't in jail.

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>>32558157
I support this action.

>>32558253
NO.

We'll surprise him with our tanks.

>>32558253
this sounds pretty good to me

>>32558242
King is a deviant and he needs to go inna woods.

>>32558230
Thirding.
>>32558255
No, we just assumed that was why he sounded down.

>>32558136
>[X] “How did this happen?”

>>32558172
>>32558175
>>32558190
>>32558194
>>32558205
>>32558229
Mixing these

>>32558230
>>32558253
With these.

>>32558255
Wait what.

King won't give up on her boy toy so easily.

>>32558230
I think it was kinda implied way back when we were trying to do THE BEST QUEST IN THE GAME.

>>32558282
They are all deviants. Let them rot in spellhold!

>>32558255
>>32558305
When did King break up with him?
Did I miss something?

>>32558303
>how did it happen
>How did it go
>Where did it come from cottom eye joe

>>32558323
That's a waste of perfectly good hearts and blood. We can sacrifice them instead.

>>32558337
Where did you go? Where you come from? where did you go?

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>>32558282
So is everyone who selected were-cat as their race, but you don't see me advocating that we burn all furries in God's cleansing flames.

Though that is a good idea.

>>32558337
Damnit now I can't get it out of my head, I need to sleep man.

>>32558337
I did have been married long time ago.

>>32558369
And then neck beards started the Athkatla... I mean... Eckechi Mage Guild.

>>32558265
But would you side with the Southern Lander Confederation or the Northern industrialized Adventurer States?

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>>32558369
>Coyote follows us to New York
>we offer up the entire population as sacrifice

We got tanks. Who will fucking stop us?

>>32558483
Depends, which side will pay more?

Tanks ain't cheap.

>>32558497
The hundreds of level 90s that can shred the tank with a fart

>>32558497
Mecha-Coyote will after the spirits' industrial revolution.

>>32558483
>Last name is Grant
>Picking South

Shameful Display, bringing disgrace upon your not actually related ancestors.

>>32558528
South has better agriculture, but the North could institute an economic blockade of the sea and air.

We should probably ask Aideen about lander politics. That was one of my favorite parts of Log Horizon.

>>32558552
We'll probably have several level 90's driving MBTs by we get to New York. Hell, Coyote might even be the commander of one.

>>32558555
How do you waifu mecha-Godzilla I mean Coyote.

>>32558585
MBT with twin dragons on top?

>>32558593
I dunno.
Let's find out, shall we?

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>>32558642
Only if they're cute.

Does a flame tank count as a MBT? I think that's more of a support tank.
We should obviously build one, but MBTs are our bread and butter.

>>32558700
MBT with a level 90 sorcerer strapped in it.

>>32558735
Why not two sorcs

>>32558735
See, that's the thing.

A MBT should have a steam cannon on it that allows non-range classes to participate in a range battle. Mages and healers should get their own dedicated vehicles that will protect them while they fire through portholes or a turret. Guardians should get an APC.

>>32558748
Why not make the entire city a tank?

>>32558748
But you can just get a summoner who teaches his summons to drive tanks.

>>32558789
Genius!

>>32558782
So mage and healers in APC/battle fortresses. Guardian APC? It does not have enough armor!

>>32558789
Why not have two tank cities. That combine.

>>32558825
Just strap some more guardians to it.

>>32558789
An entire mobile (flying or otherwise) fortress/city would be pretty awesome

>>32558789
Nah, we should put it up on hydraulic legs and go around the country fighting other cities for resources.

No prize if you get the reference

>>32558825
Guardian APCs would be designed to get a whole bunch of guardians into the thick of the battle faster.

Guardians are already insanely armored. They're just lacking in speed, which the APC provides.

>>32558834
Hell make the entire USA an armored megastructure.

>>32558834
What about a continent on a tank?

>>32558834

We'll call it Cybertron.

>>32558846
Chrome shelled regios muh niggah

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>>32558867
>>32558873
>turn the USA server into a giant airship
>invade Europe

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yydlX7c8HbY

I can't wait until we are able to build a world spell device. It'll be so much fucking fun.

>>32558890
That show gets a prize for having every girl be worst girl.

>>32558136
Well, guess that means he wasn't wearing the pretty pink dress.

>>32558890
Now I have to watch this show.

>>32558853
That... actually works well. A zoomer to ferry Guardians around. Although their role is useless now that we have thick steel between our squishies and the monster.

Now to use Guardians effectively, get them heavily armored tanks and then activate the hate generating abilities. Enemy tanks literally can't turn away.

>>32558937
>Now I have to watch this show.
You really don't. It's pretty horrible.

>>32558890
>>32558920
Not even close
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Io5ugE9b_1Y&feature=kp

>>32558914
Fuck that. Invade Japan. The author really didn't think of the consequences that would be attached to Japan getting a server update first. That server should be flooded with people from every server raping the land for exp/gear.

>>32558937
Guardians basically serve as anti-tanks and close combat. The battle becomes our tanks vs their tanks and our guardians vs. their guardians.

And really, we're more likely to be fighting goblins and shit, so guardians aren't useless.

>>32558886
Transformers please stay.

>>32558996
>coyote becomes the leader of the predacons

>>32558964

Perry Teitoku pls

>>32559015
That's okay, because Predacons are best.

The blood of the infidels will oil the gears of these machines right?

>>32558948
Ahhh too bad.

>>32558968
It will exactly be like that Star Ship Troopers scene with flame mechs against buggers.

>>32559035
>>32559015
Animatron you plebs!

I always wanted to try to say that.

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>>32558303
“Yeah I'm here.” You roll your eyes. “They respawn, don't they? Look, if you need some help running from-”

“They don't respawn!” He screams, “If they die they die forever! IT'S NOT PKING! IT'S MURDER! IT'S DEATH! THEY DON'T COME BACK!”

“Woah woah! Calm down!” You whisper, “Where are you?”

“I-I-I'm in my r-room.” He begins to breath heavily, the kind of breath one has when they are trying not to cry. “God damn it. I should have listened to King.”

“Did anyone see?” You didn't have time for him to ramble on. “Did anyone see you do it!?”

“N-Yes? No. I...” He takes is a long breath. “I don't know how to explain.”

“Just start from the beginning. What the hell happened?”

“We needed more chefs, and you can't count of players to not stab you in the back so I hired the NPCs who could cook and...” He goes silent for a while.

“And!?” You ask, on the verge of shouting.

“And I needed to make sure they would never tell anyone, so I... I told them that if I ever found out anyone else knew how to cook I'd kill all of them an-... and their families.”

It takes you a while to process that information. “You were going to do WHAT!?”

“I wasn't actually going to do it!” He shouts, “I only wanted them to be afraid of telling anyone, but...”

“What the hell happened!?” You ask.

Should we teach landers to build and/or pilot our tanks, or is that a bad idea?

Should we be worried about Aideen? Or is she our lander mascot?

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>>32559102
Goddamnit.

>>32559102
“We were in the kitchen one day and this guy. This NPC. This lander. I don't know how he got inside, but there he was. Before I even knew what to do, Outis grabs him and just stabs him over and over again. Before I could even stop him, the man was already dead. I... I started screaming at Outis, asking him... asking him why he did it and...” He pauses. “And he... he says... he says that he did it to protect his family. That... that as long as the man died before anyone else found out what he knew, I don't have to kill anyone...”

“But then that was him! You didn't kill anyone!”

“But he only did it because of me! If I had just listened to King and not worried about the secret getting out, he'd still be alive! He died as a direct result of my god damn actions! Fucking... I... I buried the body.”

“Where?”

“The Central Gardens.”

“Did anyone see you do it?”

“I don't think so.”

You try to take a moment to think.

[ ] Insert custom response.

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>>32559102
BAD END

>>32559104
We spent a long time on the ship with her and we still have no clue who she is.

And I am ok with that.

>>32559102
You stupid bastard.

>>32559124
Wait, he left a body? Landers don't leave bodies when they die.

>>32559124
You fucked up bro. I mean, holy shit, the hell man

>>32559124
Righto fuck this race. Reverse the tank we're heading for the Big Apple.

>>32559124
When is burying someone in the central garden ever a good idea?

Everyone knows every creep bury their dead there. It will be the first place for everyone to look.

>>32559158
[x] This. Call him out.

>>32559124
Technically not his fault.

>>32559124
Tell him to stay calm and keep quiet. We're on our way with a tank.

>>32559170
Getting there right now won't help him man.

We need to change the laws to make this a non-murder.

We need to take over the nation.

>>32559190
>implying there are laws against murder
>implying there are laws

>>32559124

You fucked up, but you had no way of knowing that this would happen.

That doesn't mean it wasn't a really dumb thing to do, but you can't fall apart right now. You don't even know if the landers are really alive or not.

>>32559190
There is always the option of kiting the C meister to the city. Ain't nobody going to look twice at a dead body after he's been through town.

>>32559124
>[X] Insert custom response.
Get out of the Big Apple, staying there will just drag you down to Outis's level. If this shit is fine, the city is going to go to hell quickly. We need a new location to meet up at.

>>32559218
>>32559124
Y-yeah... they could only be perfect simulations of living, thinking beings.

Landers aren't ACTUALLY real. That's crazy.

>>32559170

Yeah, nah, we are winning this race.

He should probably confide in King and start making plans to leave the city though

>>32559227
I like you anon.

>>32559231
[x] I am with this man. Ask King to make the trek west ward. With grandfather clocks. Ford every river.

>>32559244
>confide in King

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

>>32559231
Agreeing with this.

King and her guild need to GTFO of New York if it's gotten so bad that landers are murdering each other to please the adventurers.

Just pack it up and head somewhere else. Like D.C. or Philly.

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>>32559158
>>32559178
>[X] Call him out.
This seems like a good idea.

Also, you aren't responsible for others' decisions. In the end, Outis still had a choice. He could've just tied the lander up, and figured out where to go from there. It is NOT YOUR FAULT FAGGOT.

We need to get there real fucking soon. The Food Riots will start soon. And then Big Apple becomes hell on earth.

>>32559201
This is not Detroit anon.

>>32559124
That's weird, the town guard didn't immediately fuck the lander up for violating the rules? Are player-owned interiors exempt?

>>32559257
What is wrong with it? Your busty guardian amazon princesses will protect you for all of your days.

>>32559124
what happened to MiB? I'm missing a couple of hours of conscious thought, did that happen to you?

>>32559278
Does the town guard arrest landers? That's a good question.

They might not because of crime and wars and stuff.

>>32559274
It will be soon.

>>32559274
New York has a bunch of heavily armed warlords staring at each other from impregnable castles. I really doubt there is any central authority that could enforce even the most basic laws.

>>32559273
No. The lander is not dead.

He would have dissipated. No. He pretended to be dead so no one's family has to die.

But we suffocated him by burying him.

>>32559320
Nah, it will just be Vancouver after canucks lose again.

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>>32559326
FUCK.

So he did kill him. But he didn't know...

>>32559278
Inside a player owned building counts as a different zone

>>32559325
Uhmmm. I need to read up on more of the lores.

Warlords as in mofia bosses or China before WWII level of warlords in power?

>>32559373
Warlords as in Feudal warlords.

>>32559253
>>32559260
as the guy you're agreeing with, King cannot be trusted, after all she runs the guild that knows how to make tasty food, and is likely monopolizing it.

>>32559401
The fact she's monopolizing food is exactly why she needs to skip town and set up shop somewhere else.

>>32559390
Sengoku New York!

>>32559422
Would you not monopolize tasty food too?

>>32559401

A monopoly that at least in the short run benefited her guild and her "boy"toy

That's not really evidence to say she can't be trusted. After all, we aren't going to be sharing the secrets of SteamPanzers to any scrub that asks.

>>32559422
And so the MacDonalds was born.

>>32559448
Anybody with even the most limited physics background will be able to reproduce a steam engine once they knowi its possible, and driving around a giant steam tank kind of gives that away.

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>>32559326
I repeat: BAD END

How long ago did he bury him? Dig his ass back up to see if he's still there.

We might still be in time!

Damn you MiB for paranoia!

>>32559448
No. We will share it. With a kill switch built into everyone.

>>32559443
I would monopolize tasty food, but I wouldn't try to feed a city the size of New York.

Landers are probably customers as well, which explains why they're so stressed. The food riot will affect landers as well as adventurers.

>>32559158
Rundlehouse left a body for quite a long time, unless I skipped over something. Either way I'm just going to go with a "You don't know that."

>>32559326
Don't mind if I do.[+1 That Just Happened]

Now I need to try and count up this mess of a vote.

>>32557485
So that's what lilac's sabotage was.

>>32559489
Dog left a body because they constantly cast resurrection on it.

>>32559489
I fucked up. I fed the Little Father ideas.

>>32559486
I long for the day I see landers smashing windows to steal TVs during a flood.

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>>32559489
>[+1 That Just Happened]

FUCK

>>32559489
Well, maybe he dug himself out again... right?

>>32559489
Didn't they keep Rundy alive through gratuitous use of revive spells?

>>32559489
They were spamming raise spells to prevent him from bursting into treats. He lost a fuckton of exp by the time he actually did come back to life due to the exp cost associated with the spells.

>>32559582
So Kill Bill?

>>32559582
So you can totally kill people and not get the guardians on your ass just by forcing them into a tiny airtight room?

>>32559582
and then became a vigilante
"Get busy cooken or get busy dyen'."
"Yer godamn right."

>>32559582
That's an even worse outcome than him dying, given the repercussions.

>>32559582
That means the food riot is averted!

Quick, let us get someone unrelated to do this! Especially that engineer in NewYork who slapped the lever onto the gate for us!

>>32559582

No, unless Zombie Apocalypse is a thing in this setting

>>32559489
The majority of the votes seems to be "Call him out" which was just discussed can't happen due to a lack of knowledge, so...

[ ] Turn this bitch around. Get to Big Apple.
[ ] "You get the fuck out of there right now!"
[ ] "Have you talked to King about it?"


>>32559594
>>32559593
>>32559519
That didn't even occur to me because I am stupid. Excuse me while I jump off a cliff.

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Remember when this quest was about racing dwarves in a giant tank?

Good times.

>>32559658
>[ ] "You get the fuck out of there right now!"
We need to find a new meeting place.

>>32559658
Combine:
[ ] "You get the fuck out of there right now!"
[ ] "Have you talked to King about it?"

Into: Get King and get out of town. With red shoes.

>>32559658
>[ ] "Have you talked to King about it?"
[ ] "You get the fuck out of there right now!"

Yeah, no, we are not quitting this race. We won't get there in time anyway.

Either he gets away with murder, or he will have to escape through his own power. We can't do a damn thing about it

>>32559658
>[X] "You get the fuck out of there right now!"
>[X] "Have you talked to King about it?"

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>>32559658
>[ ] "You get the fuck out of there right now!"
>[ ] "Have you talked to King about it?"

Tell King and her guild to leave quickly and quietly. This is a scandal that could sink their business.

Set up their food monopoly somewhere else. Hopefully they are able to leave before anyone notices the dead body and connects it back to them.

And of course the food riots.

>>32559658
[]other
Are you in any actual danger from this or is this more of a moral thing? If it's a moral thing, just consider that you didn't actually kill anyone. Your actions may have contributed to a death, but the person who did the deed still has ultimate responsibility.

I doubt King cares, and she's the only authority that is actually relevant to him.

>>32559703
>>32559690
>>32559683
And by removing the only source of good food, we effectively started the food riots.

Wait, could them leaving cause the dreaded food riots? People freaking out about not getting their delicious food anymore? Are we about to ruin Big Apple with our advice?

>>32559658
[X] Turn this bitch around. Get to Big Apple.
Let Coyote have the racers we've got family to help.

>>32559721
Completely true and worth mentioning.

We are smart enough to predict the result of a sudden business closing, right? We don't need meta to say "there are consequences to your monopoly."

But if they leave fast enough, they should escape the riots.

>>32559728
No, because King will give precisely 0 fucks about our advice to leave.

>>32559658
>[X] "You get the fuck out of there right now!"

>>32559747
Hopefully she recognizes there is a fucking murder connected to her business and it will ruin her financially.

>>32559743
No. That is where the lander chefs come in.

They will be carrying on the business.

>>32559767
>landers
>mattering

What makes you believe anyone would care?

>>32559776
In during the lander Indian chief... I mean warlords raising an army.

>>32559770
Oh, good point.

Maybe let them keep running the place while the guild skips town.

>>32559776
Moralfags will care. Some people wouldn't, but enough will care to tell the local feudal lords who will probably get increasingly nervous which will play into the MiB's plan.

Remember there was almost war in Japan over the suspicion of Adventurers acting badly to Landers.

>>32559793
Landers against a level 90 guild would be like an army of five year olds against the US Army.

>>32559767

How in the world is that going to ruin her business? She has monopoly on essentials.

>>32559658
>[ ] "You get the fuck out of there right now!"

>>32559805
There might be like, six moralfags in all of New York.

Landers aren't really people to the vast majority of adventurers.

>>32559826
Moralfags might come in and seize her assets, much like the slave labor production guilds had their assets seized in Japan.

>>32559847
>seize her assets
Impossible. Like, actually against the physics of the world.

Do you know anything at all about this setting?

>>32559847

>slave labor production
>"rogue" middle manager at best might have murdered what used to be a NPC without knowing what was happening

Yeah, somehow I don't think you are going to get a lot of popular support there

>>32559860
Yeah, a fair point, but you don't know all the particulars either.

Tiny Shep could throw all sorts of shit our way that might lead to scandal, food riots, and our bro getting strung up like those poor guys in Area 51 did.

>>32559860
>>32559810
Behold as six landers stand outside of your shop, holding signs and generally making so big of a rukus and look so menacing that no one dares to approach.

Welcome to DownTown East Side, Vancouver style of intimidation.

Oh, you can't PK them on the street either. The guards are watching.

>>32559905
Make six airtight boxes. Shove landers into them.

For added intimidation, make the boxes transparent.

>>32559834
>>32559749
>>32559703
>>32559697
>>32559690
>>32559683
>>32559681

[+1 Advice Giver]

>>32559840
>six moralfags in all of New York.
And they all have rope.

>>32559905
Pick them up and toss them out the city.

>>32559905

Which doesn't stop customers from buying food, because fuck that noise, nothing's going to stop you from getting that fukken pie

>>32559924
>>32559929
Anons are the best.

>>32559965
Adventurers aren't fucking automata. They're real people from our world. Some of them will be liberal moralfags, others will be Christian moralfags. Both of them might argue for Lander rights.

>>32559965
America at its best. Apple pies. Fuck yeah!

>>32559992
Yes, while they're sitting down at a nice cafe while eating their pie.

Cause if you think anything will keep amerifats from their pie, you are sadly mistaken .

>>32559992

And they all lover their fucking pie

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>>32560047
>>32560027
I really hope you guys are joking and aren't this autistic.

Yes, there will be some people who will only care about good tasting food. But others won't care and will go back to eating the bad tasting food in protest.

This conflict might even BE the food riots.

>>32560098
ITT: One moralfag who has no understanding of the setting tells everyone else they're wrong.

>>32559992
The real question is whether or not they know landers are sentient now.

>"Huh, cool AI," muses Mr. Amerifat as he strolls inside to the only place that sells food with actual taste

>>32560123
>>32560106
>but Amerifats are dumb
>you don't know anything because the circumstances can't be replicated identically!

Really? Are we really supporting our claims with jokes from /int/ and the belief that the only way to make large amounts of money is through selling food?

>>32560123
Even if they know, whether the care is kinda up in the air.

Level 90's are functionally superheroes compared to landers. Plus the immortal thing. It really isn't much of a stretch to assume they view landers as a lesser race, with limited (if any) rights.

>>32560098

It's both a joke and a truth.

Boycotts don't work when you have (1) something that everyone wants, and (2) no one else has a way of replicating it.

Yeah, some individuals can eat their tasteless shit, but why should the business care about them?

They are already so short on labor that it's probably going to create a food shortage, a portion of the market turning to alternatives might be a blessing in disguise.

This is basically Business 101, folks. You don't need to capture 100% of the market to make a killing, you rarely even need 50% of the market share.

>>32560151
The one making alarmist claims is you, bub.

>OH NOES, A LANDER DIED
>EVERYONE WILL RISE UP AND BOYCOTT THE ONE SOURCE OF TASTY FOOD

No one will care.

>>32560170
>(2) no one else has a way of replicating it.
do you think that no one will ever figure out the way to do it by themselves? Now that they know that there is a way, there will be people putting al lot of money and effort into figuring it out.

>>32560199
Well, that's not what the votes say. People want our bro to leave.

We could advise him to set fire to the city. I'm sure he will listen in his current state of mind.

>>32560215
Tinyshep made the votes skew toward alarmist panic with his options. There wasn't a 'Just calm down and breath deep, bro' option.

>>32560214

Probably not, it's a fragile monopoly. However, there are still some considerable barriers to entry and the guild will still have a competitive advantage in terms of scale, establishment, and prior know-how for sometime.

You would probably still make a tidy profit regardless, but you would make a killing while you maintain the monopoly.

But that has absolutely nothing to do with moralfags boycotting your store suddenly leading to the collapse of your entire enterprise.

>>32560268
Not really "suddenly," more like "eventually."

But if they pack up and go to another town and rebuild their production capabilities, they'll be back on top in no time.

Hell, it might be somewhere with better access to raw material. I'd imagine New York to be pretty well hunted.

>>32560249
You have a point there. I didn't even take that into account.

My apologies. It didn't even occur to me to put it as an option.

Almost done writing.

>>32560151
You underestimate how much the human mind craves taste. People used to dedicate their entire lives to traveling the world, seeking out new spices to enhance taste. Weeks of eating nothing but cardboard would drive you insane, and an "AI event" isn't going to stop anyone from one of the core pleasures your brain is hardwired to seek out.

>>32560348
Human meat tastes good, but that doesn't mean anybody sells it.

>>32560301
Yes, we need just look at our world to see how effective moral outrage is at eventually leading to the collapse of corporations.

>>32560381
Pretty hard to carve a body when they explode into bubbles 5 seconds after death.

>>32560381
human meat isn't an ingredient that's dropped

>>32560408
>>32560398
I mean in our world, guys.

>>32560418
pork is easier to build a supply chain for.

also,
>what are cannibals throughout history

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>>32560392
>scandals don't affect companies

So I guess PR firms exist just because CEOs like paying people to say good things about them.

>>32560348

Anyone is a poor generalization, most everyone would be more accurate.

The point being that not enough people would boycott to make a difference.

>>32560381

Was this really the best counterargument you could think of? Really?

When there are alternates which taste better, are easier to obtain, and are legal (i.e. every other type of meat out there), you generally lean towards those alternates.

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>>32559925
“Get the fuck out of there!” You shout, “Just get up and go!”

“But...”

“No buts! Just go!”

“What do I tell King!?”

“Tell him the god damn truth! If you love him so much-”

“Her...”

“King's a woman!?” You are quite perplexed. “You're not gay!?”

“Please I... I don't need this right now.”

“Okay.” You sigh. “Just talk to her. If she doesn't leave with you, good riddance. If she does, good for you. Overall, none of that matters. Just get the fuck out of there when no one is looking and never go back.”

There is silence.

“Do you hear me!?” You shout.

“Yes!” He yells back.

“Good. Now I've got a race to win. I better see you with a cart and ten grandfather clocks next time I see you!”

“Okay...” Is all he says before CLICK.

You sit on the bed and just take a moment to process what just happened.

How the hell did everything become so fucked up. You just wanted to race your god damn land-ship.

You lay back in the bed and stare at the ceiling. You feel the rumbling of the treads going over the ruined roadways.

Your eyes close.

You drift off to sleep and dream of...

==========
End Session

Next Session begins with:
[ ] A Dream of Teeth
[ ] A Dream of Crowns
[ ] A Dream of Nothing


I'm really sorry about today's session, everyone. Wildstar came out and I was playing that instead of preparing like a good QM. Bonus Session Saturday as an apology!

>>32560497
>[ ] A Dream of Nothing
Nothing and No one?

>>32560497
[ ] A Dream of Teeth

Sounds like a Coyote dream to me

>>32560161
In the middle of modern America? not likely.
>>32560418
The entire Aztec civilization would like a few words(and delicious spices) with you.

>>32560497
[ ] A Dream of Crowns

>>32560497
>[ ] A Dream of Crowns
For our ultimate conquest of everything.

>>32560497
No worries. I need to get into the habit of prepwork myself.

>[ ] A Dream of Crowns

>>32560497
>I'm really sorry about today's session, everyone. Wildstar came out and I was playing that instead of preparing like a good QM. Bonus Session Saturday as an apology!

Seriously? I've been playing it as well, what server are you on?

>>32560497
[ ] A Dream of Crowns

>>32560497
>[ ] A Dream of Teeth

>>32560529
>modern America
>MMO players

Yeah, those two don't actually intersect very much with regards to morality.

>>32560497
>[ ] A Dream of Nothing

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The dream could be of teeth crowns.

>>32560571
Enough of your anti-Clapistani talk.

>>32560497
>[ ] A Dream of Crowns

>>32560497
>[ ] A Dream of Teeth
>>32560526
or the person we ran over.

>>32560651
>implying we ran over anyone
>implying we didn't just repair lilac's sabotage

How well can Judi see when she's driving?

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Threadly reminder

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>>32560728
W-we can still cut the nooses, right?
Or is that a metaphor for those cowboy assholes?

>>32560601
>>32560564
>>32560551
>>32560535
>>32560534

[Confirmed for dream of Crowns.]

>>32560728
There you are!

I've been waiting for that to turn up for the past three sessions.

Also, did anyone look up what Outis means?

>>32560497
>[X] A Dream of Crowns
How is Wildstar? I'll definitely play with you.

>>32560571
Outside the the really crazy little shits videogame behavior is way different than one would act in an ET situation. I mean the first thing you'd have done in a videogame would have been to talk to every damned npc until something happened look for a new npc or just wander aimlessly to try and trigger something like a cutscene.

>>32560728
holy shit the grinning man gave us our map

>>32560743
>Odysseus

FUCK

Aideen is the traitor.

>>32560743
Unfortunately I havent been able to make the last couple of threads, so I didnt get a chance.
>outis
Cute.

>>32560743
>Outis
you are truly a monster.

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>>32560743
>Also, did anyone look up what Outis means?

>Outis is the MiB

Fuck he's trying to cause the food riots himself.

>>32560755
oh gods why
kill the map
kill it

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>Fear No one
>Outis is literally No one
FUCK. FLEE BIG APPLE OH GOD

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So... how many people are using us as their pawn?

Coyote, MiB/Outis, the Grinning Man... who else?

>>32560841
Coyote isn't the manipulative type. He wins people over by reaching their hearts.

>>32560873
I'm pretty sure Coyote just steals a shit ton of XP and let's them respawn. Unless you're a lander, of course.

>>32560873
And really Coyote is most definitely the manipulator type since he's the Native American Loki.

Once Coyote calms down from his bezerker rage, he'll be a force to reckon with.