>>31663580
>/tg/ returns
>moot once again being a stupid shit that doesn't know how the fuck to code things.

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>>31663580
>Things are likely to happen

And I will miss all of them. Based luck!

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>>31663580
HA HA, MAKO TIME

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Majestic

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>>31663602
>sanageyama's face when mako monkey power hour

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Soon.

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>>31663649
>Dosharada's face when Monkey doesn't give him the shinai

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>>31663679
Satsuki felt Ryuko's heart being pulled out

It only means she will also feel the bad touchy~

>>31663701
Too bad she didn't feel Ryuko losing her way

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>>31663580

Finally, in for the beginning of a thread

>>31663759
You can "thank" moot for that.

Gonna be a slow start, gotta do something first.

It's that time again.

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>>31663855

So on a scale of 1 to "literally", how boned are we right now?

>>31663937
Skeletor.

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>>31663937
thanks to /tg/, beyond literally and right back around into figuratively.

>>31663937
Hopefully she'll at least lube us up first

>>31663973
CHOCOLATE
GOATEE

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>>31663937
Well, Maiko could still bust us out.
Gotta believe in them Jews man

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>>31664031
>Just as I was about to munch into a yorkie for myself....
Cheers anon you glorious bastard

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>>31664065
>mako
>not satsuki
you do realize that we're closer to satsuki than mako in this timeline, right? if anyone could break the control over us, it'd be big sis

This CYOA reminds me of some good time I had with Teen Titans CYOA, please continue.

Also requesting art with bro-fisting Iori.

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>>31664105
Maiko not Mako

>>31664105
well, i fucked up. "what is reading comprehension"

>>31664108
>Teen Titans CYOA
Shame I wasn't around for that. Would've enjoyed that

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>>31664105
I said Maiko, buddy
I can't stand Mako either

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>>31664108
I've got this

>>31664108
Gladly there's less skin flaying, eye gouging and repeated murder and other fun times

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>>31664155
Yet, you mean

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>>31664128
implying that i don't like mako

Right, let's get this started, and by that I mean writing.

>>31664155
Just you wait, when we've started our fun and innocent adventure in Jump City nobody even expected we will end up watching how our waifu dies... twice.

I miss the community, these fanarts were amazing.

>>31664371
>waifu
Older sister figure you mean
But yeah, it was fun
Also dat faux game over

>>31664198
Written on top of my dog.
Fuck guro.

The lights flicker as you sit in front of your computer. You came to Honnouji Academy because a friend wanted to go, and we was your only friend, so you went with him. You and your friend went into separate clubs, though, so you drifted apart, your friend entering the acrobatics club, while you went to guess your way through the computer club. At least no one questioned why you played videogames all day.

You're sitting in your one-star home when someone puts something on your lap. "Hold this."

"Sure, man, whatever." You glance down to see what it was. It's a leg. Not, like, a chicken leg, or the broken leg of a table, a real severed human leg. You squeal like a little girl and shove it off of you.

"Awwwww, now you got it dirty."

You look to see a naked girl sewing a severed arm onto her body.

"WHAT THE FUCK!?!" you scream.

"No no no, you got it dirty, go clean it!"

"IT'S A FUCKING HUMAN LEG!!!"

"It's MY leg, now go give it a bath."

The leg waves at you from the floor. You stare.

----------------

You shiver as you wash the leg.

"Make sure to get in between the toes!" the girl in the other room screams at you while the leg wiggles it's toes.

You try not to vomit as you lather soapy bloody water in between the toes while the girl in the other room giggles happily.

"Okay it's done!"

You take the leg out of your ruined bathtub and get up to take it to the girl.

"Up up up! Dry it first!"

You look at the leg in fear as you wrap your white towel around it, apologizing to the fabric and promising to burn it later so it will no longer besmirch the earth with it's ruined presence.

>>31664715

Taking the leg to her, she examines it happily. She's now got both arms functioning, with a red thread attaching the left arm to her body.

"Wow, you did a good job!" she says as she moves the leg you washed to where her right leg should be and takes out the same red thread that keeps her arm on. She hums while she does her morbid task.

"What the fuck," you mutter, unable to look away anymore

Eventually, she finishes, standing to test out if everything is in place. You don't even care if she's naked or not, you just want her the fuck out of your house.

"Thank you for letting me stay!" she says and then kisses you on the cheek before skipping out of your door.

You blink, standing in the middle of your blood-soaked living room. You walk into the kitchen and pull out the beer you were hiding for a special occasion. "Fuck guro," you say after the third can.

>>31664715
>>31664743
>"No-Star CYOA: Alternate Draft"

>>31664789
Shut up I was tired of waiting.

>>31664809
Fucking hell man, I didn't know it's you

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>>31664715
>>31664743

I see bad things happen if I take too long. Good thing I'm about to post.

"...The mansion?"

"Now that I know you're my daughter, you should visit your home, and spend some time there, Ryuuko."

The two of you head to the Kiryuuin mansion. It's a gigantic building, rivalling Honnouji Academy in size. Ragyou has you stay in Satsuki's chambers.

Your first night there is mostly sleepless, as you have too many things to think about. How much more has Ragyou figured out? What is Satsuki doing, and will she be alright? Will you be able to remain free of Ragyou's influence without blowing your cover?

-------------------------------------------------

You get up before the sun rises. There are some final preparations to be made before the Battlefield Trip. You head straight to the Sewing Club lab.

"Iori, is everything ready?"

"All uniforms have been completed and handed out.", Iori says.

"But, there is one more thing that needs to be done.", your father chimes in.

"And that is?", you ask.

He holds up a large yarn ball of Life Fibers, and proceeds to wrap himself in it. After a moment, the Life Fibers start to meld together, and change his form into that of Nagita, wearing a green Battlefield Trip tracksuit.

"I will go with the Osaka group, and keep my head down until we make contact with Nudist Beach. You will need me to negotiate with them , after all.", he says, in Nagita's voice.

"That's true. Just... be careful, father."

"Don't you worry, Satsuki. After all, I've managed to keep my identity a secret even from you, so I'll be fine."

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>>31664065
>>31664119
>>31664128
Some Maiko would be fun, but I think she's a bit more appropriate as a participant for one of the battlefield/raid trips.

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>>31664715
Made me think of this.

>>31664991
This. Give Ruse-chan something to do. Maybe infiltrating the mansion as a maid.

>>31664974
Poor Osaka. Nagitadad, Sanageyamcha, Mako and Data coming their way.

Cheers guys, at least we're not being sent to the rape cage.

As long as we can play along and make Ragyo think we're on her side, I doubt she will try to corrupt us, or Senketsu. she saw our power when being synchronized and I doubt she want to make her allies weaker by corrupting their uniform, at least for now.

Also, I doubt he bad touch will be something more than fade-to-black if it does happen.

>>31665063
This world would be more fun if DIO was in it.

>>31665177
this; for god's sake, let's not be pants on head retarded when it comes to our choices, a.e. not letting your dicks control your decisions

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>>31665230
Yeah guys lets try to run away or talk back to two monsters that can easily overpower us instead of playing along.

That was bullshit and i'm still mad.

>>31665228
every world would be more fun if DIO was in it.

>>31665230
>Yeah guys, just fight off Nui, Ragyo and Houououououououomaru instead of playing along a little

>>31665288
I don't mean hearing Ragyo out; that was the only real viable choice. I'm just saying we shouldn't give in or join her if presented the chance: doing so doesn't cast any suspicion on Satsuki, after all.

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>>31665340

He is the best waifu

please tell me this silence isnt more technical problems

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>>31665962

Well, you posted, so I'm going to guess not.

We usually fill the time between OP posts without choices with abject silence or we descend into madness and paranoia.

>>31665962
OP is secretly hoping for more Nui guro.

>>31664974
It's almost time, so you head back to the tower, and step out to the balcony. Countless trucks are lined up in the courtyard, waiting for you to give the word.

"Three years of study here at Honnouji Academy! This battle is the first step towards realizing our ambitions! I have but one command to impose upon you: win. Honnouji Academy Big Three Battlefield Trip, roll out!"

The students all board the trucks, which start up their engines and move out. You head to the helipad, where Soroi is waiting for you, next to a helicopter. You both board the chopper, and it takes off, following the cordon of trucks.

-------------------------------------------------

The following day, you wake up at noon. You finally managed to get some sleep after thinking most of the night.

Still, all this internal brooding didn't really help you figure out how you should act upon the knowledge you've obtained yesterday. You still don't even know how you should feel about your body, which is infused with Life Fibers.

One thing is for sure: you don't intend to let this knowledge weigh you down. You're essentially still deep in enemy territory, and must remain on edge. You can philosophize later.

Luckily, Ragyou let you keep Senketsu, and it seems she hasn't attempted to tamper with him any further. You're not alone here, at least.

"Ryuuko. Was letting Ragyou have her way the right decision?", he asks, as you put him on.

"No clue. At least, it seems she hasn't figured everything out."

>>31666037

If only we had actual telepathy. Or encrypted communication. then we could know Satsuki's moves.

And then it's just an obvious "Hey, Mom, Satsuki's body is probably like mine now, maybe we should go join her in the field and tell her the good news" then BAM close the trap.

But sadly, we would not know to do that.

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>>31666029
Do not bully the Nui.

But I don't think she'd mind getting a little gutted.
Hehe, squishy guts

>>31666127
>Satsuki and Ryuko develop telepathic link
>Ragyo is able to tap into it

>>31666037
It's that time again.

[ ] Satsuki
[ ] Sanageyama

Mako is off-limits, since I can't possibly hope to convey her thought processes in a human language.

>>31666306
>[x ] Satsuki

We gotta keep our eyes on the big picture

>>31666216

>it becomes a party line for all life fiber hybrids
>"Oh, hey girls, plotting my downfall? Alright, but I'm just going to imagine everybody naked VERY loudly now."
>"GODDAMMIT"
>"Hehe, that seems fun Ragyo-sama, I'll join in"
>"DOUBLE GODDAMMIT"
>Cue Satsuki in Osaka headbutting a brick wall repeatedly to try and beat the demons out of herself

>>31666306

>[x] Satsuki

Time to RTS

>>31666306

[ ] Satsuki

>>31666306

>[X] Sanageyama

>>31666306
>[ ] Sanageyama
Time for some First-Person-Jobbing

>>31666306

> Mako is off-limits, since I can't possibly hope to convey her thought processes in a human language.

I'm not surprised at this point. Atleast you can admit she's obviously a Eldritch Abomination.

[ ] Sanageyama

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>>31666306
>[ ] Satsuki
OH BOY

>>31666306
>[X] Sanageyama


BANANA

>>31666306
>[ ] Sanageyama

>>31666306
>[x] Satsuki

Monkey has tons of backup, we don't need to micromanage him.

>>31666306
>[X] Sanageyama

>>31666369
>>31666370
>>31666371
>>31666409
>>31666433
Just barely.

>>31666306
>[ ] Satsuki
59 45252989

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>>31666462

god damn it

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>>31666462
This... this means time for DOSH right?

>>31666348
>when not doing anything, Satsuki and Ryuko just start doing "your mother" jokes to each other

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>>31666533
Yes.

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>>31666533
>the wolf of osaka
>not the tiger of osaka
the person who made this missed out on such a perfect opportunity
this is an outrage

>>31666306
You're gonna try BITCH.

[X] Mako

>>31666826
>this is an outrage
THIS IS AN INSULT TO OUR INTELLIGENCE

>>31666969
SHUT YO MAUF

>>31666306
"...Yes, those are the forces Honnouji Academy is putting forward. I'm going to head to HQ."

Mikisugi Aikurou is in his hideout, talking over the phone. Somehow, it hasn't been searched by the Student Council after the incident with Tsumugu here.

"What about Matoi? Did you manage to find out anything about her?", Tsumugu asks.

"Not a single thing. It appears as if little miss Satsuki was completely unfazed by Ragyou's abduction of her like that. Seems she has a lot in common with her mother."

"Man, I still can't believe Ragyou survived that shot. I thought I got her, but in the end she just regenerated like it was nothing! Guess the bullet is not as useful as we'd assumed."

"I wouldn't be so quick to discard it. We now know it can temporarily incapacitate the likes of her, at least."

"True, but it's really difficult to create. That was the only one we had, and making another one might take a while. Anyway, I'm heading out as well, so I'll see you there."

>>31667159
>Seems she has a lot in common with her mother
I wanna see him beat up like a runaway slave

>>31667159
>Completly unfazed

I can't get the [scream internally] picture out of my head now.

>>31667159

Man, Mikisugi is either a terrible spy, or Satsuki's poker face is just that good.

Because I know we very dramatically stood and posed in the middle of the arena with Jiyuzan at least. If not other things.

Yes, I know it's kind of both.

>>31667258
I hope he never says that to her face. The bloodstains will become a permanent part of the carpets.

>>31667159
>Guess the bullet is not as useful as we'd assumed
OP you sly asshole

>>31667304
Well, he was busy avoiding the worse touch from Ragyou, so he didn't get to see everything.

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>>31667309

There will be no blood.

The force of her rage will obliterate him entirely, leaving only a puff of ash and a pair of scorched shoes behind. All that will remain is the faint echo of a girly scream and a whisper of "ping pong circulate"...

>>31667364

So confirming bad spy then, jumping to conclusions when you don't have all the DA- I mean Intel.

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>>31664743
Man, if I were that guy I wouldn't let Nui leave the house.

Guro with her would be amazing.

Fuck...

>>31667482
Sure, until she decides its your turn.

>>31667956
oh god.

Is OP gone?

I hope not. We didn't even get a goodbye.

>>31667482
So... is the idea of guro that the girl isn't actually injured by the mutilation? I thought it was synonymous with gore and never looked into it.

>>31668355

I hope not, 4chan was just broke again for a while.

>>31668377
Oh. Good.
Why does moot hate us?

Fuck moot for not being able to code and FUCK YEAH for making it in time!

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>>31668394

Moot hates all things that are not money and boat.

m00t finally ran to m00tsico.

>>31667159
Lady Satsuki tasked you with subjugating Naniwa Kinman High School in Osaka, and babysitting Mankanshoku. The first task will likely be easy, but you're not so sure about the second. She might be pretty skilled when it comes to fighting, but there's no telling if she won't just wander off somewhere instead of helping you.

Even though you can't see it, you can clearly sense how gaudy the school is. You assemble the troops in the school's courtyard, and a rather large amount of students comes out of the school gates to meet you.

Suddenly, you hear a voice, though you can't sense the person it's coming from.

"I'm surprised you made it this far, you pitiful Honnouji Academy fleas."

The voice, filled with arrogance, sounds somewhat electronic. A speaker?

"I am the Naniwa Kinman High School Student Council President, Takarada Kaneo!"

"Ooh! They have a huge TV right above the entrance! We should get something like this, too!", Mankanshoku calls out. So, that's what it is?

"Maybe you should! But, it's too late to think about that now! Once we're done with you, Kiryuuin Conglomerate will be too busy recovering from the losses to afford that! And don't expect a loan from me!", Takarada says.

Kinman Students advance foward. It seems that they're armed with guns, and intend to use them.

[ ] Send the clubs to take them out
[ ] Take them on yourself

>>31668460
>[x] Send the clubs to take them out

WWLSD?

Send a wave of men first, and if that fails, take to the field directly. A general cannot command from the front lines. Or something.

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>>31668460
[ ] Take them on yourself

We Dosh King now! Try to "capture" him and get him to join your rebellion.

>>31668460
>[ x] Send the clubs to take them out

can't let him job this one guys

>>31668460
>[ ] Send the clubs to take them out
You live!

>>31668460
>[x] Send the clubs to take them out

>>31668460
[ ] Send the clubs to take them out
They will job, and then he will job.

>>31668460
[ ] Send the clubs to take them out

>>31668460
[ ] Send the clubs to take them out

>>31668460
>[ ] Send the clubs to take them out

>>31668485
>>31668499
>>31668506
>>31668508
>>31668518

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>>31667956
And break her fun sex toy?

>>31668376
If you combine Guro with a girl who's immortal, can put herself back together, and enjoys being taken apart, then it goes from the spectrum of disgusting all the way to the opposite end and becomes something truly spectacular.

There's so many different things you could do with a girl who can individually move parts of herself.

>>31668561
Of course, if the girl doesn't enjoy being taken apart...

>ITS AWWWRIGHT

Actually, it's gotten a bit late. I was planning to do way more than just this today, but I suppose Moot had other plans.

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>>31668652
If the girl doesn't enjoy it then it's just murder/torture, and I don't get off on that kind of stuff.

In fact, I'm not at all into Guro, but I am into a girl who isn't at all harmed by being taken apart and enjoys it. And the guro has to have a practical sexual use, rather than just simply taking the girl apart.

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>>31668880
MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT

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>>31668880

damn it Moot

Archived http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive.html
I'll try to make up for this tomorrow, assuming there won't be any more downtimes like this.

>>31668935
I wouldn't be surprised if there was. I got a feeling this hacker incident isn't over.

>>31668935

Just, y'know, Dosh King. It'll take care of everything.

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>>31668880
Fuckin' Moot! 'tis cool OP cheers again

>>31668967
There's a hacker incident?

>>31669003
Got all of our login info and everything. Dastardly son of a gun.

Will there be a No-Star Quest tonight?

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>>31669045
Prepare the candles.

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>>31669045
You know what you need to do anon
BEGIN THE SUMMONING RITUAL

>leave for dinner
>come back
>op is gone
Welp, anyone want a CYOA oneshot to lessen the pain.

>>31669045
>>31669107
>>31669148
Comepletely missed you guys.

I don't got time for that today, but I can offer you >>31669292 as temporary sustenance.

We shall feast on his fle- Words.

>>31669408
Do I... take that as a yes?

>>31669492
Yes.

>>31669577
If you could tell the steam group, that'd be great.

RULES!!!:
I DON'T WANT TO CONSTRAIN YOU ALL WITH PANSY-ASS PRE-MADE CHICES, SO THIS IS FREE FORM!!!
FIRST TO FIVE VOTES WINS!!!
AT EACH VOTE, I ROLL TO SEE HOW GOOD YOU DO!!!
20 GUD, 1 BAD!

I SHALL BEGIN AS SOON AS PEOPLE SHOW THE FUCK UP!!!

>>31669577
No.

>>31669666
Why not just do it yourself?

>>31669666
>those satan trips
Oh shit I am a summon-ritual demon.

Also, >CHICES
Well, this'll be fun.

>>31669715
Steam don't work on this computer.

5 weeks.

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>>31669666
I'm ready.

>>31669734
How? I'm impressed that it doesn't.

>>31669776
Fuck if I know how. This thing is a brick with internet.

Anyway, writing.

>>31669801
Compaq. I know that feel.

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>>31669666
>666

>>31669758
5 weeks too many.

>>31669801
Are... are you gonna make a new thread? This one is halfway to the bump limit, it might be better for you if you make a new one.

>>31669839
It's just gonna be a shitty one-shot.

I can't go all night, here.

I don't see why I have to.

NOW LET ME WRITE!!!

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>>31669870
YOU WANT WRITE? YOU WANT CYOA?
FUCK YOU, HERE ROAD!

There's a steam group?

>>31669666

A man in a business suit walks up to you.

"Hello," he says. His breath smells like sprinkles, or jimmies, or whatever you call what you're supposed to call sprinkles. "I am Self-Appointed Votecount-Fag, also known as Self-Appointed OP, more commonly known as VoteP. Because of moot related incidents, instead of continuing my regularly scheduled and well thought-out CYOA, I will be watching The No-Star Writer, or NoP, for short, dance like he's my little monkey minion. And YOU... are his minion. So may moot help you, 'cause he sure as hell ain't helping me."

"What is your name, child?"

[X] CUSTOM CHOICE, FAGGOTS!!!!

>>31670043
Bob Dole.

>>31670043
Bob Dole

>>31670043
Richard Nixon

>>31670043
Bob Dole sounds pretty good.

>>31670043
David Davidson

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>>31669916
>>31669836
http://vocaroo.com/i/s1XojlezQ4Ij
Get Hype.

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>>31670108
BOB DOLE 96!

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>>31670043
Ragyou Kiryuuin.

>>31670078
>>31670099
>>31670102
>>31670162

"Bob Dole."

"Well, Bob, you're in for a treat. You see, to you, this is all a dream, but it comes with a warning. If, by the end of this thread, you don't die, the one known as 'your waifu' will be horribly, horribly murdered."

"Fuck, man, I just wanted to chill."

"So did NoP, and look where that got him. It started a conversation about guro. Now go off yourself before it is too late."

Your eyes burst open.

[X] Custom

>>31670043
Dole Bob

>>31670220
[x] Kill yourself.

>>31670220
>[x]Gouge eyes out

Get that blood flowing

>>31670220
Not my waifu. I'll trade an AMERICAN hero for my waifu any day.
[X] Turn that blood into skittles. Make him taste the teary rainbow.

>>31670220

Kill yourself

Rolled 4

>>31670243
>>31670273
>>31670281
>>31670302
>>31670308

>>31670220
"Hehe my waifu is imaginary, you can't kill imagination strange voice in my dreams"
Proceed to fap furiously

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>>31670220
[x] Check for rope, pills, a gun, razors, and a window

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>>31670322

>>31670351
But she isn't my waifu

Rolled 2

>>31670322
Can't decide if this'll work out or not.

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>>31670384

>>31670389 And it won't.

You feel the urge to turn your blood to skittles. Skittles are fucking awesome. You decide your best method will be to eat as much skittles as possible, so that your blood to skittles ratio is thrown off. Going to your closet, you open it to reveal packs and packs of skittles. Sadly, they are all sour.

You now are in extreme pain on the floor. You can no longer move your face.

[X] Customary

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>>31670424
Thats better

>>31670447
Roll on the floor, try not to cry, CRY SKITTLES

>>31670447
[x] Run for president

>>31670447

Stop breathing.

>>31670447
>Not liking sour skittles
Fucking dropped, 0/10, would not hold hands with

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>>31670447
>[x] More skittles

>>31670481


I second this motion

>>31670489
You mean they don't inflict pain upon you?
They're fantastic, but in the vinegar chips kinda way.

>>31670447
Drink some coke and mentos
at the same time

Rolled 5

>>31670478
>>31670481
>>31670482
>>31670493
>>31670507

>>31670447
Engage in cold war nostagia and attempt run presidential campaign against Clinton.

>>31670538

You decide to run for president. Club president, student council president, corporate president, president of Japan (fuck prime-ministers they're all pansies), you'll work out the details later.

For now, it's time to become president.

You declare yourself as president of the room. Then you realize it doesn't work like that, so you declare it and then elect yourself as president. By popular vote, you are now president of the room.

You feel dissatisfied.

[X] Custodian

>>31670616
Try to fix the timer on your vcr

>>31670616
[x] Call Ragyou and tell her her dresses are shit
That's a sure-fire way to get killed

>>31670512
IT IS A GOOD PAIN

Like Warheads. You eat enough of those at once at it'll cut a scar into your tongue! Then you will have become A WARRIOR!

>>31670659
Teach me the way of bushido-skittilo-souro.

>>31670656
Seconding.

Call her a Final Fantasy boss reject.

>>31670616
[x] find phonebook/google Ragyou's number so we can do this >>31670656

>>31670616

Steal the declaration of independence

>>31670616
Try not to trip all over DAT EDGE

>>31670616
BEES!?

Rolled 2

>>31670639
>>31670656
>>31670692
>>31670700
>>31670711

>>31670737
America wins again

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>>31670767
DOWN WITH THE SYSTEM

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http://vocaroo.com/i/s0tB8dwjdsux

>>31670842
Jetstream/10

>>31670842
Wow thats pretty damn impressive

>>31670737

You smell sprinkles and you hear a voice in your head laughing.

Shaking your head, you grab a phonebook. Who the fuck has a phonebook anymore? Well, apparently you do.

Flipping it to a random page, you find Kiryuuin Ragyo at the top. Saves you work and trouble.

The phone rings.

"Hello?" answers a feminine voice.

"Is this Ragyo?"

"No, this is her secretary."

"Can I talk with her? It's about her daughter."

"Alright, forwarding you to her now..."

...

"Hello?" a sensual voice says.

"Your dresses are shit."

You hear the distinct sound of a phone snapping.

[ ] Customoot

>>31670905

Walk outside and scream REVOCS sucks at the top of your lungs

>>31670905
LUBE UP AND PREPARE FOR HIGH IMPACT SEXUAL VIOLENCE

>>31670905
[x] Turn skittles into traps, rig the room

>>31670933

>>31670905
Yell REVOCS while lubing up with some Skittles brand lube for the sexual experience of a lifetime

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>>31670931
Oil up.

>YOUR MOVE, MRS KIRYUUIN

Rolled 5

>>31670931
>>31670933
>>31670942
>>31670951
>>31670970
Fuck man this is getting good.

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>>31670971

I'm ready when you are

Rolled 1

>>31670994

You go back to your open skittles closet and pull out skittles brand lube. You strip naked and lube every part of your body. Every. Part. Every. Hole.

You are now sufficiently lubed, but you cannot get outside to yell REVOCS as the lube on your hands prevents you from opening the door.

>>31671034
Try anyway. Get it together.

>>31671034

BREAK A GOD DAMN WINDOW

>>31671034
Use your teeth to open the door.

>>31671034
Build an escape route out of spaghetti

>>31671073
But that's lubed, too.

>>31671034
Blast your way out with piss

>>31671034
Open the fridge and wake up the Pillar Men to help you

Rolled 4

>>31671045
>>31671071
>>31671073
>>31671074
>>31671092

Rolled 10

>>31671123
Rollan for spaghettimancy.

>>31670616
[x]Infiltrate Bowser's Castle

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We need to tap into the inner workings of the human mind.

http://vocaroo.com/i/s1edMgpltMfL

Rolled 12

>>31671151

You lift your hands and spaghetti shoots out of your window. You leap onto it and stand.

It is then you remember you are 12 stories above ground.

So, there you are, lubed in every part of your body, standing twelve stories up on a plank made of spaghetti.

A slight breeze blows and you fall from your perch.

You are now on the ground. For some reason you are fine.

>>31671260
Call upon the power of Greyskull

>>31671260
I forgot to put custom at the end of both.

Still custom, though.

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>>31671260
Become a Pompa-Blade

>>31671260

eat the glass

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>>31671260
Channel your inner skeleton, demand it to fetch skittles.

>>31671260
Start yelling about how REVOCS is working with the Reptilians to enslave mankind.

>>31671307
>>31671329
>>31671331
>>31671338
>>31671380

>>31671380
>not elves

Rolled 4

>>31671397
Forgot to roll sorry.

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>>31671397
You made me NoP. I WAS SAVING THIS.

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>>31671397

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>>31671397

Rolled 4

>>31671397
>>31671435

You channel your inner skeleton. A wave of nausia overcomes you as you fight to take it over.

You demand of it skittles. But it says one thing to you cackling, before it goes back into it's deep slumber.

"I think, therefore I am."

[X] Crusty Crab

>>31671521
[x] Expel the skeleton from your body

>>31671521
BORSCHT
NEEDS
AWAKEN SKELETON
YES???

>>31671521
Release a no.1 hit single with Andy Dick

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>>31671521
[x] Borscht

I need it. Give it to me.

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>>31671521
Play this

Rolled 2

>>31671544
>>31671554
>>31671567
>>31671572
>>31671598

>>31671621
... Holy shit.

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>>31671655

COMPUTER DIED
NOW ON MOBILE
BORSCHT COMPELS ME!!!

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>>31671978
Are your bodies ready for borscht? Mine is.

>>31671621

You feel the need for borscht. You go up to an annyway, grab a trash can, fill it with some dirty water, ans throw some rocks in. You then start a fire with some of the trash. That ought to get a good stew going.

"Is good, but is not granddaddy good. Here, try borscht."

A massive, tattoed russian man stands behind you, holding a pot.

"Why do you have borscht."

"All Kiryuuins are to have borscht. You are to have borscht."

"No thanks, I'm good with my own."

The russian leans in. "Have borscht."

"Liste-" suddenly the pot is burning your lips while molten borscht flows down your throat.

>>31672161
[x] Genuflect

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>>31672161
Brush Nui's teeth

>>31672161

The russian takes the borscht away. Tears form in your eyes as you try to compute what the hell happened.

And then it hits you. A fire is lit in your chest like no other.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!" you scream out to the world. The russian man, having finished what was left, screams with you.

"COMRADE!!!" the russian shouts to you.

"YES, COMRADE!?!"

"KIRYUUIN SATSUKI SAY SHE IS NOT OF LIKING BORSCHT!!! WE ARE TO CHANGE THAT!!!"

"YES!!! WE MUST!!!"

[ ] Storm Mess Hall
[ ] Storm Mess Hall
[ ] STORM THE FUCKING MESS HALL!!!

>>31672302
>[ ] STORM THE FUCKING MESS HALL!!!

>>31672302
[X] STORM THE FUCKING MESS HALL!!!
What else?

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>>31672302
[x] Storm Mess Hall
[x] Storm Mess Hall
[x] STORM THE FUCKING MESS HALL!!!

HOPE YOU'RE READY FOR TRUE PURIFICATION SATSUKI!

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>>31672302
>[X] Storm Mess Hall
>[X] Storm Mess Hall
>[X] STORM THE FUCKING MESS HALL!!!

>>31672302
[X] CLAIM MESS HALL IN GLORIOUS NAME OF BORSCHT

>>31672328
>>31672348
>>31672361
>>31672393
>>31672419
FIVE VOTE, ALL FOR SAME THING!!!
WHO WOULD KNOW THIS WOULD BE!!!

>>31672452
Witchcraft

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>>31672452
I knew it would be. Borscht cannot be stopped and Satsuki must feel its love. She must be made true strong Russian woman. Strong eyebrows, jaw, and body are there, but heart is not. We must show her strong Russian heart and make her true woman.

>>31672452

"COMRADE, WE SHOULD OF INVADING MESS HALL!!!" you suggest.

"YES, IT IS THERE WE CAN MAKE MORE BORSCHT!!!"

You both scream as you run to the school.

-------------

The lunches of all the good little boys and girls is relatively quiet and peaceful. Students in the academy generally try to be behaved in the face of the oppressive disciplinary committee.

This was about to change.

You and who you learned was named Ivan charge into the cafeteria wearing only red pants and ushankas, and firing rounds filled with borscht from AK-47s. The disciplinary committee cannot withstand the power of borscht, and the ones that do not fall immediately join your ranks.

You storm the kitchen, and rush to the back to gather beets while Ivan prepares the pots.

"WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS!?!" Gamagoori screams.

"BORSCHTLING, CONVERT THIS MAN BY FORCE!!!"

"YES, COMRADE!!" you scream at Ivan. You pounce at Gamagoori with a bag of beets. He does not budge.

"... Satsuki needs to eat better. We're going to give her borscht," you say.

"Hmmmm," Gamagoori says, staring down at you. "From what I recall, Satsuki doesn't li-" an entire pot of borscht is forcefully shoved down Gamagoori's mouth.

"She will like," Ivan says simply.

Gamagoori swallows, then starts screaming.

cont.
THE CONVERSION BEGINS!!!

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>>31672875
>Gama is on our side now

BETTER PACK YOUR BAGS FUCKERS, NOTHING'S STOPPING THIS TRAIN!

>>31672875

"FANTASTIC!!!" screams Gamagoori.

"INDEED, COMRADE!!!" shouts Ivan.

"AS THE PERSONAL SHEILD TO SATSUKI, I MUST NOT LET HER HEALTH FALTER BY NOT EATING ONLY THE BEST, AND I SEE YOU FIT TO CARE TO HER NEEDS OF NUTRITION!!!"

"DAH!!! BORSCHTLING, I MUST OF MAKING SOUP, YOU WILL BE OF TAKING COMRADE GAMAGOORI TO CONVERT THE REST OF SCHOOL POPULATION!!!"

[ ] PINK ACOUSTICS!!!
[ ] ELECTRIC SHAMALAMA!!!
[ ] TECHNO-TYPIST!!!

fuck you tiny ipod for not being able to handle this much story

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>>31672875

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>>31673013
>[ ] ELECTRIC SHAMALAMA!!!

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>>31673013
>[ ] PINK ACOUSTICS!!!

Let's get that band slut on our borscht dick!

>>31673013
[x] THREAD ARTIST

Iori

>>31673013
[x] POMPADOUR

>>31673089
YES!!!

>>31673013
[x] BUTLER

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>>31673089
MADNESS! SUCH MANLINESS COULD NOT BE CONTAINED!

>>31673073
This.

Borscht Regalia time

>>31673064
>>31673073
>>31673089
>>31673137
>>31673058
SO WE ARE IN AGREEMENT THEN!! MAKE BORSCHT FLOW THROUGH SPRINKLER SYSTEM!!!

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>>31673165
YES

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>>31673165

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>>31673165
Do it you motherfucker.

>>31673165
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K3dbd2YyeN0

>>31673165

"WE CONVERT ALL OF THEM IN ONE ATTACK!!!" you scream.

"HOW!?!" asks Gamagoori and Ivan at the same time.

"WE MAKE GLORIOUS BORSCHT FLOW THROUGH SPRINKLERS!!!"

"THE BOILER ROOM IS NEARBY," Gamagoori says, "WE COULD LIKELY GET BORSCHT THROUGH BOTH THE VENTS AND THE WATER SYSTEM SIMULTANEOUSLY!!!"

"HAHAHA, YES!!!" booms Ivan.

"HOWEVER, THE MAIN TOWER WHERE SATSUKI IS IS CUT OFF FROM THE SCHOOL VENTS AND WATER SUPPLY!!! WE WILL HAVE TO TAKE HEAD ON!!!"

"WORRY NOT, COMRADE GAMAGOORI, DO WHAT YOU MUST DO NOW!!!"

"YES COMRADE!!" you both shout.


cont.

>>31673362

Half of the borscht crazed mess hall remains to help Ivan with the making of borscht, while you, Gamagoori, and the other half charge, a unified screaming mass, to the boiler room.

You find only a young couple there, which Gamagoori proceeds to force feed borscht while the hoard rips off an emergency firehose to take back to the kitchen to let the borscht flow.

After rigging the boiler to the borscht supply with some duct tape and a hair pin, borscht proceeds to flow instead of hot water.

The tennis club is pelted with borscht while they shower after a long session.

Children force other children to drink borscht from the water fountains.

A fire alarm is pulled, just as you hook up the borscht to the rest of the water system, raining borscht upon all the school.

Nonon is cunducting when the alarm goes off, drenching her band while they spring to their feet, loudly playing the Soviet National Anthem.

Uzu is Practicing when the sprinklers he feels something off. But he cannot run from what flows around him. He, too, cries out in the name of glorious borscht.

Inumuta watches over the sowing club when suddenly everything goes on lockdown. He wonders what is happening briefly while he watches all the life fibers be sealed in cases. Then a massive tidal wave of borscht comes rushing down. The sewing club stands no chance.

Finally, a lone student sits, contemplating instead of going to classes. He is so deep in thought he doesn't notice the rumbling beneath him until it shaked his pompadour. He opens his eyes to see the hoard having already surrounded him.

There was no escape, for anybody.

[ ] Go for Satsuki.

>>31673820
>[x] Give her the B

Sorry I'm taking so long I'm tired and this shit's hard.

>>31673820
[x] Go for Satsuki.

We must teach borscht to her body.

>>31673820
[X] Go for Satsuki.
No escape!

>>31673820
>cunducting
Indeed.

>>31673820
[x] SATSUKI TASTE GLORIOUS BORSCHT

>>31673856
>>31673884
>>31673888
>>31673901
The final battle begins.

>>31673985

You, Ivan, and a good portion of the students, including the elite five, ride on Nonon's hyperspeed space-blimp to the top of the tower. Swarming onto he helipad, Satsuki's butler puts up a futile attempt at trying to defend from the onslaught. He, too, is converted in the end, the power of borscht too much. Then, all that is left is Satsuki. She sits on a throne, in her bathrobe, holding a glass of tea.

"So, Ivan, you've finally come for me."

Ivan walks forward, a pot of borscht in hand. "You eat borscht."

"Borscht," the hoard mutters softly to each other.

She looks at everyone, eyes unreadable, then takes her spoon out of her tea and puts it into the borscht, where she takes it out and blows on it. She then lightly takes a sip.

>>31674171

Satsuki suddenly throws her head into the borscht, where it drains rapidly. She lifts up her head with a wild gaze.

"STUDENTS OF HONNOUJI ACADAMY!!!"

The room is silent.

"BORSCHT STRONK!!!"

The hoard erupts into applause. Students storm the city, gathering more and more new converts everywhere they go. And you stand there, and watch, glad to be a part of the borscholution of Honnouji Acadamy.

/thread