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My group is going to raid a dungeon organised by newbie kobolds who are pretty naive on dungeon building.

I want to focus the inexperience from the kobold side at defending a dungeon in a comedic way. Any ideas of hilarous (or, at least, funny) situations or traps you could find there?

I don't want to fall upon "lol, so random XD" or clingy stuff. I am more about dungeon workers being catched while putting traps, unexpected enemies or obstacles and traps that don't work as intended but fuck it up the PC party anyways.
>>
A series of 30 deep foot traps that would be dangerous to the average kobald, but to a human it just causes there foot to be stuck in a hole. Pursuing enemies tank advantage of this.
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A pit of molten steel in bucket wrought out of something with a much higher melting point, kept over a door. The lava cooled though, dropping a large bucket shaped iron ingot on an unsuspecting adventurer.
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Pic related.

Also a swinging logfall that doesn;t account for human height and so smashes one of the party in the balls.
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>>31531700
They come across a kobald, living or dead, hanging from his foot from a rope from the ceiling. It seemed it was a snare trap that he set, and then accidently stepped in himself.
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a Giant bear trap with a shiny rock or gem in the middle.
Either have a Kobold corpse already stuck in it or have the trap not trigger when sprung (maybe they set it wrong)
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A saw blade that is shot to and fro across the room, but is tempered out of poor steel. After colliding with anything made of metal, it shatters, bombarding the enemy with shrapnel.
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A drowning trap where the room fills up slowly with water and pirhanas.. The kobalds neglected to feed the pirhanas and there isn't enough water to fill the room, but luckily the pirhana's ghosts still want revenge.
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Writting down all these awesome ideas guys. Please, continue. You rock.

Have a kobold equiping heroic gear from the PCs.
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Pit traps with dangerous animals in them. The animals haven't been fed and have starved to death
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An array of arrow slots where arrows would be fired out after being set off at regular intervals. The arrows would be fired with a small amount of poison from a large tank, but the kobolds neglected to make the arrow slots big enough. This causes the arrow slots to spray poison in a mist a bit after the trap is activated, although its effects are weaked since it doesn't go directly into the bloodstream (unless your party has members with open cuts)
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One of your PCs step on a pressure plate. There is the sound of pressure being released and a several small gusts of air from some holes in the wall. Under the holes is a box of darts, they never got around to loading the trap.
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>>31531755
Or there's a severed Kobold arm lying next to it and a corpse not too far away, and with the gem in the middle of the activated trap.
Turns out he did the math wrong and the polished rock was heavy enough to set it off immediately.
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A bucket of water perched on top of a cracked open door.

A horizontal catapult swing-arm with a stuffed end remarkably resembling a boxing glove.

A pit of quicksand that stops at neck height.

A net trap where the net is too small.

A large hunter's cage that instead releases an incredibly pissed off ferret.

Scare-traps that flip out boards with comically drawn faces on them complete with "boo!" speech bubbles.

A pot filled with gems...and some kind of incredibly sticky sap or glue that adheres to anything it touches and is almost impossible to get off. Shenanigans ensue by anyone who reaches in.

An extremely complex and impressive locking mechanism that's holding closed a very flimsy door.
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A room designed to flood when entered, they forgot to fill the tank but a Gelatinous cube has moved into it and is unhappy about being poured into a room full of adventurers.
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Pressure plate triggers a ceiling-trapdoor. dropping barbeque sauce on the party.

Implications of a dragon living elsewhere in the dungeon are fabricated.

Instead party is harrassed by flies, bugs, and other vermin.

2. The simple alarm trap.
Tripwire triggers trap. A simple ringing bell - alerting the kobolds. Early traps aren't deadly, or complex, just simple and useful.
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The party enters a dark room filled with white platforms, filled with golems that mimic the movement of each of the party members. Causing the golems to fall because of poor platform placement is a large flaw, but the fact that the golems land in a splash below and continue to mimic the party members, knocking over all the platforms in a domino effect saves the trap. The party is then forced to fight swamp monsters on the ground while their mimics dutifully continue mimicking their movements.
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A trapdoor that sends the victim who stepped on it falling to his doom.
The hole is about kobold's width and any larger adventurers get stuck in it halfway through.
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Caltrops. On further examination, the caltrops are in fact an assortment of poorly-carved d4s.
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An entire corridor covered in banana peels. They don't actually make the adventurers slip when walked on.
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>>31532080
He asked for traps that DON'T work as intended.
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A series of more translucent tripwires the kobold placed, hoping they'd miss them. The kobold designers built a falesafe to test the traps al at once however; a pressure plate after the first line. Neglecting to disarm the plate after they tested it, it was painted over and blends in with the rest of the floor quite well.
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A perfect set-up for an Indiana Jones style boulder trap but the rock disintegrates when it falls from the ceiling onto the track trench because it was very weak stone.

A magic ward intended to melt the flesh of anyone who crosses it but instead causes them to be tickled uncontrollably for about 10 minutes.
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A boarded up locked side door that opens onto nothing an unstable Scaffold, if the PC stands on it they collapse under their wight, below you can see a variety of tools and some ladders, the room looks to be under construction.
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The steep upwards ramps have been carefully greased to make climbing them almost impossible.

A group of malnourished kobolds is stuck at the bottom since they did the oiling going top down
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is it wrong to laugh at the thought of their being kobold skeletons wearing hard hats sitting at the bottom of every trap?
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A dangerous flight of stairs full of pitfalls that turn invisible randomly. However, the kobolds neglected to take down the scaffolding used to build it, opting to turn that invisible too. The scaffolding however, can only hold a kobold's weight and will collapse under a normal person.
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>>31532161
Ok, that was pretty funny. Props if he finds down below a kobold on a staircase sheeply painting the bottom of the pit.
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A collapsing floor that drops the PC's into the middle of a group of kobolds still in the process of preparing the pit.
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Indiana Jones rolling rock trap which was put under/near some falling water, so the rock eroded away. When the trap is activated the eroded and asymmetrical rock comes slowly and embarrassingly wobbling down the path, maybe even falling off of it.
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A trap that unleashes a swarm of owlbears on the adventurers. The kobolds however, though owlbears were just owls strapped onto bears. The trap just releases a series of bears with dead owls tied to the back of their heads.
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Perhaps some experimental trap attempts, like ropes that drop down on the person's head with bear traps on the end of them facing up or down and peanut butter smeared on the trigger in the hopes that they land peanut-butter side-down on the adventurers. Up the ante with the floor giving way to an unfinished pit maybe 5 feet deep with some digging tools stuck in something like coleche or something similarly tough to dig through.
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Fuck, now I have realised one simple detail. What happens if the party just go "I roll perception to see any traps" or uses spells for trap perception? How could I handle this so it wouldn't ruin the fun of, at least, the harmless ones?

Inb4, kobolds traps are so awful they are not considered traps for any spell
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Venomous arrow trap shooting out of holes in the wall, but they put them in backwards so the party gets uncomfortably pegged ruffled by the base and fletchings of the arrows.
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A tightrope with a rather obvious mechanism designed to cause the rope to split in two when weight is placed on it. The trap can be disarmed or avoided, but any weight placed on the far side of the rope causes that side to unlatch from the wall, due to a termite infested stake.
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>>31532331
Explain what the trap is supposed to do (you see a bear trap infront of you) so when they try to dissarm it they fall into the room below where the kobold 's did a shit job of the roof/floor.
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>>31531323
GAZ Orcs of Thar has some humorous ways to run humanoids, with lots of random tables for skills, traits.
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>>31532331
Yo describe it like you would any respectable trap and then laugh at the party when they try to disarm it.
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A trap that sprays the party with a coating of butter, and then drops them so that they land face first on the spikes below (due to buttered toast always landing face down). However, the spikes were too expensive, so the trap just drops the party face first down a 10 foot deep hole, filled with the ghosts of the lactose intolerant kobolds who died building the trap.
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A fountain laced with what they were told was poison but turned out to be LSD.

Re-animated skeletons that are comically clumsy.

A hall of mirrors with a clear set of markings along the floor leading to the exit left behind by the last kobold working on it so he could find his own way out.

A worn, frayed and perilous rope-bridge over a yawning chasm that doesn't collapse.
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Near the entry, crudely scrawled on the wall in broken common, is the legend "GOA WAY DARGON WIL EET YU"
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>>31532458
They come to a door at the end of the hall way, all over ways to be checked before this were dead ends. A small "Do Not Disturb" sign hangs on the handle of the door.
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A tripwire that causes a giant blade to come swinging down, miss the adventurer, and cut every other tripwire in the corridor on its way down.

A spike pitfall trap where the spikes are rather dull, placed at angles such that the victim will hit the sides of the shafts and not the tips, and poorly cemented into the ground so that they sort of just collapse under a person's weight.

A friendly animal set up as a guard, presumed to be a perfect sentinel on the basis of how vicious it was towards the kobolds who captured it, but which in fact really just doesn't like kobolds.
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A pit. Filled with bones of polio and osteoporosis undead skeleton; they were half off.
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Describe the scariest goddamn group of undead you can think of. Rotting flesh, scary armour and weapons, the whole deal. When suddenly, out of nowhere comes a half-elf bard dressed in a bright red jacket (pictured).

I'll let your imagination handle the rest.
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>>31532458
There is a deep pit trap with spikes on the bottom to the far left of a hallway. The hallway is well-illuminated and the pit is not hidden in any way. Above the pit, on the wall, is written:
"plees fall in"
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War hounds.

A particularly nasty breed of yorkshire terriers.
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A series of signs that fortell danger and pain are just ahead. After passing the signs, they come to a sign written in extremely small text "Reeding tyney words hurt eys"
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>>31532554
Actually thinking about putting some yorkshire, cute little bunny or little critter and give them high stats. Just like in that Monty Pitton's movie.

Or maybe some shit like >pic related. Cute and cuddle and,... suddenly...

> Yo describe it like you would any respectable trap and then laugh at the party when they try to disarm it.

Basically, describing with a very serious face how the trap would have worked (and failed), while he suscessfully disarm it, right?
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A tripwire that sets off a swinging blade. The blade is on such long pendulum that instead of making a complete swing, it hits the ground mid-swing and gets embedded there.
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A cold room that is filled with cups of warm milk and blankets, designed to hit the cold blooded the hardest (a bit of an oversight of the kobold designer). There are sleeping kobold guards, who sprung their own trap. The milk is spoiled.
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All split corridors have a marking on the walls pointing towards the correct path.

Shadow puppet dragon

A powerful explosive placed on a stool used to reach a rare item. The item is on a shelf at average human height. (Effective on Dwaves and Halfings though)
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>>31532684
Rooms filled with spoiled food with signs "Free food"
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>>31531748
>It seemed it was a snare trap that he set, and then accidently stepped in himself
Something that the PCs need not be told of
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>>31533031
Well, it might be obvious, like if the rest of the trap's mechanism is visible, and so not unreasonable to tell the PCs.
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A rock that when stepped on activates an arrow wall that was made to kill the party.
The springs are just so weak that the arrows fall out right next to the wall.
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Reminds me of Discworld, Sorcery.

A vault of a sultan was trapped, and they were walking through it, and one of them was hit in the face with a pie. They kept walking through, and a bucket fell on somebody. It wasn't full of acid though, it was full of whitewash.

They kept walking, and somebody got a boot on a spring to the junk, somebody else got a bottle of seltzer sprayed on them, and they were starting to get irritated and rushing through. They got to the end, when the barbarian (who wanted to be a hairdresser) Conina, grabbed them and yanked them ahead.

Right where they had been standing, a several ton block of stone had fallen, and painted on it were the words "Laugh this one off."
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Put a door who obviously leads to a trap. If they cross it a firewall will churn everything. It is incredibly sensible, the moment one puts a feet on the other side the trap activates and since it does too soon the char who was going to cross remains unaffed. Also the real trap was the door knob, it is poisonous, unless the one who opens it has gloves or so it will be pretty fucked up.
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>>31531323

>room for keeping livestock
>hay all over the floor
>trap is a rake that they step on that smacks them in the face
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>>31533848
>the floor is covered in rakes
>there's an unconscious kobald in the corner
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>>31531986

>A pot filled with gems...and some kind of incredibly sticky sap or glue that adheres to anything it touches and is almost impossible to get off. Shenanigans ensue by anyone who reaches in.

yfw someone decides that this is the best thing ever and bedazzles themselves.

stealing this. gonna put it in an alter with a statue that "vomits" the sticky substance every x hours.
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>>31532109
stepping on such peels enrages the baboons.
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>>31532042
Someone went a little crazy practicing the alarm traps. There's a 30 foot section of hallway where each and every flagstone has a different bell trigger, making walking in it really annoying.
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>>31532441
>A fountain laced with what they were told was poison but turned out to be LSD.
A Chocolate Fountain, because Kobolds are like dogs and it kills them.
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Falling masses of beehives over a door or something.
They've been there too long, though, so you mostly just get showered in broken bits of beeswax, dead bees, and dust. Less painful, much more disgusting.
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You walk down the corridor, a bear trap falls on your head.
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Rolling boulder trap. The boulder is too wide for the corridor, get stuck, blocks the way, players are forced to find another way around.
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>>31535198
A małe bear who really wants to be a female?
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A mouse trap, except human sized - think 1kg cheese wheel in the middle of a wooden door lying flat. There is no spring so even though it looks ok, it can't go off. Also, the cheese is very mouldy, the kobolds forgot to replace it occasionally.
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An empty room with a sign to other Kobolds warning of a mega trap that kill any who enter the room.
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a room of pressure plates with darts shooting out of the walls, however, the poison has not yet come in so they fill the room with balloons full of bees
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have all the traps be based on board games
Deadly Chess
Deadly Checkers
Deadly Snakes and Ladders
Deadly Tic Tac Toe
Deadly Candyland
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>>31536897
All of these require several Kobolds to play the games against the adventurers and accept that if the loose that have to let the goblins push them in the Spike pit labeled 'losrrs hloe'
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>>31537074
>goblins
Kobolds, damnit
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>>31536897

>Life sized Snakes and Ladders
>Just a room full of live snakes because someone forgot the ladders
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>>31531323
The Dick of Vecna.

With it, you are pretty much immune to all Succubi related shenanigans or anything of a sexual nature with ulterior negative reprecautions.

And it can change size, type and form no matter what, and you can even use it to create crazy ass half undead spawn if you get busy with it, and ingest according ingredients to supplement the foreboding load, or use it to cast Death Ward and negative energy ray, and it's very own negate energy version of Magic Missile which can be done 5 times per day.

Also, you basically get the LichLoved status.

The downside, is well, I don't need to tell you what the requirement is to use the item is, now do I?
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>>31536897
http://media.oglaf.com/comic/grandmaster.jpg
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A room where the floor is split into a series of pistons that move up and down at different speeds, making it very hard to keep your footing.
There appears to be a set of small (and admittedly, blunt) spikes lining the ceiling, but the floor pistons are nowhere near strong enough to propel an adventurer to the ceiling.
The result is a room where people fall over a lot trying to walk through and it's ill-advised to jump too high. Potential wounds inflicted range from a bruised knee to a sore head.
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You enter the dungeon and the floor is covered by bones. Upon closer inspection you see that they are all chicken, pig or cattle bones and cooked.
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A room full of tripwires that, when activated, hurls chunks of wood (at low-moderate speed) from holes in the walls at the intruders. May cause splinters.
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The kobold leared says "Throw them in the crocodile pit!" and you get thrown into a water filled hole filled with crocodile corpses. They neglected to feed the crocodiles so they are all dead.

However, the dead bodies attracted some kind of huge vermin who wants to feed on them and the vermin is much more threatening than the crocodiles would be.
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>>31537790
Edit to make this potentially dangerous, some sections of the floor fail and collapse, leaving large holes that can be fallen into (which can be hard to avoid due to loss of footing on other pistons).
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An actually deep, deadly, well made and well covered spiky pit trap. It would be undetectable if not for the well-used kobold sized shovel and pick that are placed nearby.
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>>31537971
Not OP but this is perfect.
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>>31533917
This, so much this.
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A room full of Couches, Tables, Chairs, Cushions, etc.
Outside the room is the sign
"Coshin: Flowr is lava"
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>>31539504
I take it the floor has been enchanted so that anyone stepping on it will suffer some pretty severe burns.
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>>31539564
Nah, all the furniture makes it hard to move around without tripping, and the carpet is inundated with itching powder.
Don't fall facefirst into it. You will regret having a respiratory system.
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>>31531323
A trap that summons a monsters and 4 quasits.
The 4 quasits are not dangerous but they will try to hug one of the players and act as if it that player is their mom. The hugging will interrupt the player.
okay that's a lil' lol so randum, but it's all I got atm
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>>31531986
>A large hunter's cage that instead releases an incredibly pissed off ferret.
inb4 tpk
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>>31532042
>Pressure plate triggers a ceiling-trapdoor. dropping barbeque sauce on the party.
The next trap is actually dangerous and it drops you into a fire.
The traps were made by a lazy ogre.
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A shark pit. Full of Silver Sharks.
Alternatively, a piranha pit. All the piranha are pacu.
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>>31539809
>pacu
Thats about as bad as piranhas when it comes to males, they are acually recorded biting the nuts off of men in Africa.
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>>31531725
In the last PF game I played in, there was a swinging axe trap that missed every time we passed it, and we passed it something like 8 times. We joked that the shaft had bent so the axe head was now above head height
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Opening the chest launches a springloaded jar of acid into your face.

But the glass is too thick to break, so it just ricochets off your forehead for 1 damage. (But hey, free jar of acid.)
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A large sunken room about ankle deep in oil.

When the party gets to the middle, the burnt out stump of a torch falls from a hole in the ceiling.
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>>31537790
>>31537915
Honestly the floor pistons themselves might be pretty dangerous, one trip could send you head first into an upcoming piece of stone...
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Big room, only decoration is a plinth. On the plinth is a button and a sign saying "Press here".

When you press the button, out of the plinth springs a boot aimed directly at the presser's groin.
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A Medium iron golem with a large sword and shield and is really intimidating. But after it appears it does not move hardly at all. Behind it is a little sign saying "Magical constructs coming soon" making it clear that its just a large suit of armor for a to be golem.
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Axeblades fail to spring out of walls. They come partway out and seem to jam. No one is hurt.

Then the wall next to the party explodes as the spring mechanisms give way and the party is hit with flying shrapnel.
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>>31531323
A gas trap room... with windows!
A boulder trap room... where the boulder appears at the bottom of the passage instead of the top
The bait for a trap is something that kobolds love but other races find disgusting like bird guts.
A magic mirror room with panicked kobolds desperately scratching at their side of the glass, trying to get out.
A full-sized catapult with the launch lever tied by a rope to the entrance doorknob - the ceiling is not nearly tall enough for it to fire.
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Pic related, all over the floor.
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This.
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>>31549065
>>31549163

Ineffective traps. Both of these could probably work relatively well.
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>>31531725
Where's the cookie?
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>>31531986
>Net trap where the net is too small
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FCI9Y4VGCVw
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>>31531323
>Be a DM
>Have a hallway move out into a circular room with a single pitfall trap in the middle
>The pitfall trap isn't even covered, so it's just a hole in the ground
>Players walk up to it, need to get to another hallway across from the trap, they could easily walk around the pit and continue on their way
>All of them without saying it unanimously decide that this is far to easy then it should be, thus there must be more then one trap
>There wasn't
>They spend a good twenty minutes tapping all around the pit with a 10ft. pole, as well as throwing rocks at all the walls and down the hole itself
>One of them even summons a creature and pushes it into the pit
>I'm laughing my ass off which apparently made them more paranoid
>They spend another five minutes deciding what to do
>Eventually one of them gets annoyed and just walks around
>Tell him he makes it past and nothing happens
>"You're an asshole"

The best traps are always the ones that really aren't traps at all
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A series of rock golems made to block the party up a long flight of spiral stairs; unfortunately the golemist in question was a kobold who took the wall thing to heart, creating several whomp-like golems. Knocking the first whomp over causes a domino effect, knocking over the entire group.

Little known to the party, the final whomp is standing in front of a button that temporarily retracts the steps of the latter, creating a large slide. If the party isn't fast enough, they are likely to be sent to the bottom and bombarded with whompsS.
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Im just imagining a bunch of Kobolds setting this shit up, and then it cuts to an Office style interview with a Kobold talking about how stupid this shit is.
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A kobold sculptor carved a giant kobold out of solid wood, and then had it turned into a wood golem. Unbenounced to him, the wood was heavily termite infested, so any solid blow will break the golem. The unfortunate attacker will be showered in magical termites, eating all of his wooden gear.
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A pressure plate activated trap that causes a trebuchet to launch it's payload at the adventurer; unfortunately the counter-weight used by the kobold was slightly too heavy, causing the trebuchet to launch itself instead.
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>>31553742

Unbeknownst.
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>>31553876
I thot that lookt rong wen I tiped it owt.
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>>31553891

Well, at least we cleared that up. Everything ought to go smoothly now.
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>>31553936
Endede. I wyl nahw ryt a lawng mehmwyre uv mie lyphe, phore awl to enjoi.
>>
A platform with a spiral-screw like column in the center, that is supposed to spiral downwards as the party jumps on it. Unfortunately, the platform spins much too fast for the party to remain on the platform unless they hold on to the column. A bit of an oversight, as the platform drops into a large cavern filled with dangerous animals, but getting jettisoned across the room with centrifugal force is just as good.
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A mirror filled room with a siren in it, to hide it's true location. The siren however, can only sing one note: The Brown Noise. The party will probably be too busy changing their pants to fight the siren immediately; if they don't, call the players gross for walking around with shit running down their legs.
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A room with a ceiling trap, where the ceiling comes down to crush the adventurers.

Except that the mechanism breaks at about four and a half feet from the floor.

For bonus fun, make them run away from something only to have to flee back through this room, forcing them to crawl in a panic.
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>Pull-only door with Push sign
>Opens to blank wall

>Powdered poison ivy in vials labeled 'Helng erbz'

>Board of spikes on a spring
>Spring is too weak to push it more than a foot up, then falls back down
>Previous shitty trap can swing back around and accidentally knock them on
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>>31531323
A classical and dangerous one. A long thin hallway filled with darkness. Only one ray of light falling from the hole in the ceiling. Everyone who steps into this ray gets shot with an arrow. In the end of the hallway, invisible in the darkness, stands a kobold archer shooting those arrows.
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>>31531323
A rope hanging from a hole in the ceiling. Does nothing if you don't pull it. If pulled, drops a heavy stone block on you (remember that trap from Home Alone?) Not considered a trap for spells, cos kobolds were using it for climbing, they are just too lightweight for the rock to fall.
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>>31555108
"Alright, the thief was buried under that huge pile of monster bones after trying to steal... what exactly?"

A pair of pink panties from the "treasure room"

"Wow. Okay, so this strange hallway is obviously another retarded kobold trap. I'm gonna cast Find Traps and do a search"

*rolls* Alright, this hallway is not trapped

"Really? Okay, let's push on and try to find a way out of this...

*rolls* "thunk", you are shot with an arrow as soon as you step into the light.

"What the hell, man!?"
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>>31555108
This one is actually kind of effective.
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Ok so... what if after all the "inept" traps they come across about a very good trap?
Either the inept traps are there to lull them into a false sense of security.
Or the kobolds just got lucky (rolled a 20?) on one of their attempts
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>>31549065
>>31549593
This, but they packed too many and it's a solid layer of legos.
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>>31537157

or the opposite is true

>Room full of ladders as bridges to platforms across a pit
>Ladders are old a rickety and will break easily
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The kobolds use "treasure" as bait for a trap.
Unfortunately, the treasure is only appealing to other kobolds. Things like cow carcasses, or worthless, guady jewelry.

A sandwich made with black pudding.
Sold by a kindly old kobold sandwitch.
>>
I don't even play PnP games, but stuff like this is why I visit /tg/ everyday.
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>>31560921
yeah, I've only dm'd one dnd game up to level 6 before the group fell apart but this board is still nearly my home board
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What I like about this thread is more than half the time, our games don't even use traps, and nobody bothers to play an old-school trap rogue.

Springing a whole complex of half-baked rube goldberg machines and poorly engineered death traps will make the party alternatively paranoid, confused, and amused.

The boss fight has to occur in a central command center with three or four Kobold engineers frantically arguing over chalk blueprints.
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>>31542108
But the torch turns out to be magical so it doesn't give off any heat and only causes light.
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>>31533444
Thats pretty good


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