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Canis then drops into his 'Latin lover' voice. “Raid master Vertigo...” He sucked in air for emphasis, “I, Felipe, have a question that burns in my hot, Latin chest.”

The raid leader in training is stuck in awkward silence until he says, “I'm pretty sure Felipe wasn't in this instance until just now.”

“I am filling in for...” A pause for effect, “Floop.” Canis turns to face the wall behind him, “Floop had to leave to confront his wife about her affair, but what he does not know is...” The character then turns back to you, “I, Felipe, was the one who made passionate love to that woman.”

There was another awkward pause before your brother continues again, “And the question?”

“Why must I keep my attention on but one enemy why my body craves to spread my hot, magical magma all over all of them at once?”

Canis' antics were starting to get to you. You had to hide your laughter away from your mic, lest you incur the high pitched wrath of your younger brother.

“Because once you deal damage to one of them, you get a debuff associated with that specific Phosphor.” Your brother explains, “That debuff doesn't go away until that specific Phosphor is dead. If you just so happen to hit a different Phosphor, he gets a stack of a fancy little buff that increases his damage by a stupid amount, turning a straight forward fight into Tears and Pain: The Game.”

There is a lull in the conversation and you can hear your brother rub his hands together. “Alright does everyone know where they need to be?”

[ ] “Right in front, getting in his face.”
[ ] “In the back, where the useful people stand.”

>Right in front

we're men and we will be manly

>>31370045
>[ ] “Right in front, getting in his face.”

>>31370045

>In the back, where the useful people stand.

Commence keikaku.

>>31370045
>[X] “In the back, where the useful people stand.”
It's time to keikaku.

>>31370045
>[x] “Right in front, getting in his face.”

>>31370045
>“In the back
Let's play something different for once.

>>31370045
>[ ] “In the back, where the useful people stand.”
Keikaku sound's good.

>[ ] “Right in front, getting in his face.”

I don't want to watch /tg/ try to play Shiroe 2.0

>>31370045
>[x] “Right in front, getting in his face.”

>>31370045
[ ] “In the back, where the useful people stand.”
>>31370233
Agreed, let's play Aizen.

>>31370045
>[ ] “In the back, where the useful people stand.”

>>31370251
>>31370233
>>31370158
>>31370095
>>31370087

[+1 Manly]
“Right in front, getting in his face!” You yell, getting hyped up, “Chargin' in like a man!”

“And I'm staying back here.” Canis says in his normal voice.

“Hell yeah!” Your brother yells back, getting fired up, “Alright! Herp, Derp, and Shnerp are on green triangle! Dib, Dob, and Doob are on red circle! Flip, Flop, and Floop a-”

“Floop is missing.” Canis reminds your brother.

“Okay... Fine. Flip, Flop, and FELIPE are on yellow star.” Your brother's aggravation is starting to shine through. “Me, my brother, and Canis are on purple moon.” A large purple moon pops into existence above the Fetid Monstrosity's head.

“And I, Felipe, master of hot, boiling passion, shall ram my mighty rods of stone into the yellow star Monstrosity!”

“Phosphor...” Your brother reminds.

“Phosphor!” Canis as Felipe corrects himself.

“Are we done with the silly voices?” Your brother asks. “Because if we are, I'm gonna start pulling.”

[ ] Engage in more silly voices.
[ ] Prepare to taunt.
[ ] Prepare to deal massive damage.
[ ] Prepare to heal.

>>31370305
>[ ] Prepare to taunt.

>>31370305
>[ ] Prepare to heal.
In the back got more votes.

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>>31370305

>Prepare to heal.

Commence all-out assault.

>>31370305

>[ ] Prepare to taunt.

Tanks are usually the boss, and we will be the boss.

>>31370305
>[ ] Prepare to deal massive damage.
Go big or go home

>>31370305
>[ ] Prepare to heal.
Let's play a front cleric.

>>31370379
>>31370305
[x] Prepare to deal massive damage.
Attack its weak point.

>>31370305
[X] Prepare to heal.

>>31370305
[x] Prepare to taunt.
inb4 leeroy

>>31370361
>>31370305
This.

>>31370305
[X] Prepare to taunt.
Swashbuckler route engaged.

>>31370305
[ ] Prepare to deal massive damage.

Big numbers. No aggro control. Fightin with like five other dudes over every gear drop.

It's DPShitter time.

>>31370305
>[x] Prepare to taunt.

>>31370305
>>[ ] Prepare to heal.
I want to play a Cleric.

>>31370305
[X] Prepare to taunt.
>

>>31370305
>[ ] Prepare to heal.
True men heal.

>>31370361
>>31370361
>>31370397
>>31370415
>>31370421


Sorry, I wasn't paying attention for a bit.

First to 5 wins. Melee healer it is.

[+1 to Ballsy]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HtvIYRrgZ04

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Your brother, the Brawler, yells a horrid taunt at the Abomination. The lumbering monster undulates as it charges for your brother. You too charge in turn. Canis begins to play his drums, giving each of your blows a powerful, damaging burst.

The creature's HP lowers slowly but sure. "We're half way there!" Your brother yells out.

You and Canis both respond in unison, "WOOOOAAAHH! LIVIN' ON A PRAAAYER!"

The Fetid Monstrosity begins vomiting everywhere, green bubbles float up from the pools of vomit and begin to float all over the battlefield.

"Get back!" Your brother commands. You all run back and as the bubbles begin to swarm he shouts once more, "To the left!"

"Take it back now ya'll!" Cannis adds.

"Cha cha real smooth." You conclude.

After about a minute of dodging, the monster stops vomiting. "Give it all you got!" Vertigo roars.

[ ] "Claws of Mato!" (Medicine Man)
[ ] "Swords of Cherubim!" (Cleric)
[ ] "Wolf Pack Strike!" (Druid)

>>31370819
>>[ ] "Swords of Cherubim!" (Cleric)

>>31370819
>[X] "Swords of Cherubim!" (Cleric)
Cleric is the only healing class that you go in melee.

>>31370819
[x] "Claws of Mato!" (Medicine Man)
Stick a bone in it, you're done.

>>31370819

>Swords of Cherubim

>>31370819
>[X] "Swords of Cherubim!" (Cleric)

>>31370819

>[ ] "Claws of Mato!" (Medicine Man)

Shit, let's be region specific.

>>31370819
>[x] "Wolf Pack Strike!" (Druid)

>>31370819
>[ ] "Swords of Cherubim!" (Cleric)
Cleric master race reporting in.

>>31370914
>>31370894
>>31370888
>>31370865
>>31370843

Cleric wins.
[+1 to Cleric Master Race.]

>>31370819
[X] "Wolf Pack Strike!" (Druid)

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"Swords of Cherubim!" You shout as your mighty mace comes crashing into the beast. Burning swords go flying from the area of impact. Your brother's firsts begins to glow with the fiery Justice of angels.

"I bring the DeePS!" Is all he yells before his character erupts into a flurry of attack animations. That bonus damage you are giving him begins dropping the monster's HP like a lead balloon.

"Take this!" Canis announces, "The Song of My People!" His drum beats break into an obscene speed, and with each beat a small burst of energy pulses from the creature. The damage is small, but the sheer amount of hits takes the creature down.

It flops to the floor, its skin rippling before its death animation ends.

Your brother crouches down to it. "Drums of the Revolutionary!" He announces. Canis rolls need and you are barred from doing the same.

It was a good run. You had fun with your friend and brother and as you look at your brother's monk all you can say is...

[ ] "You're gonna do great."
[ ] "Let the silly voices continue once more!"
[ ] "Your character looks like a slut."

>>31371152

>Your character looks like a slut.

Even better if the character is male and he's just dressed like a gigolo.

>>31371152

>[ ] "You're gonna do great."

lets keep the silliness and sluttiness to a minimum, please

>>31371152
>[ x] "Your character looks like a slut."
This will be fun after the Apocalypse happens.

>>31371152
>[x] "Your character looks like a slut."

>>31371152
>[x] "Your character looks like a slut."
I wonder what kind of slut it will be.

>>31371152
>[ ] "Let the silly voices continue once more!"

>>31371152
>[x] "Your character looks like a slut."

>>31371364
>>31371276
>>31371260
>>31371239
>>31371183

[+1 Overbearing]
[Brother's character now looks like a slut.]

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>>31371397
"Your character looks like a slut."

There is an awkward silence.

"Really?" Your brother responds. "This shit again?"

"I'm just sayin'. When you get over to your guild hall, do you really think your guild leader is going to just nod and go, 'Now introducing the new raid leader, Vertigo the Slut'?"

"It's that stats that matter!" He protests.

"Oh, is that why you fairy ringed all the way to Korea and bought yourself that outfit?"

"Yes! Yes it is! It's equivalent to raiding tier armor and if I wanted to apply to the position I had to have raiding armor by today, which would be next to impossible unless I got it now!"

"So you think you're just going to walk in there, raid for them, and they're not going to question the fact that you had to BUY your armor with real money?"

"It doesn't fucking... I... FUCK YOU!" Your brother hangs up on the Skype call.
With that your brother glows and then disappears, returning back to town.

"Shit..." Canis whispers, "Now everything's awkward."

You sigh and grumble, "I'm gonna go work on my subclass."

"Okay." Canis responds, "I'm gonna go kick the rift." He then turns into a whirlwind of animations breaking and flowing into one another until finally he falls through the floor.

"There are easier ways to leave a dungeon."

"None are this fun!"

You leave party and grumble to yourself some more as your character returns home. "God damn. I can't believe he'd go and buy armor like that."

Before you sprawls the mighty city of South Angel. The desert sand surrounds the city, but the mighty statue in the middle of town, a giant statue of the game's god, wards away all evil and promises prosperity. According to the lore, anyways.

[ ] Time to get drunk. (Brewer)
[ ] Time to build a million levers. (Engineer)
[ ] Time to make pie. (Chef)
[ ] Other

>>31371805
>>[ ] Time to build a million levers. (Engineer)
Front Cleric Engineer, best character ever.

>>31371805
>[ ] Time to buff your melee prowess (Bard/War Dancer)

>>31371805
>[x] Time to make pie. (Chef)

Some people like to obsess over stats and optimum rotations.

But we like to bring a little slice of immersion here and there.

>>31371805
>[x] Time to build a million levers. (Engineer)

>>31371805
>>[ ] Time to build a million levers. (Engineer)
Engineer sound sweet.

>>31371805
>[x] Time to build a million levers. (Engineer)

>>31371805
>[x] Time to build a million levers. (Engineer)
HAHA! It's time to build shit!

>>31371805
>[X] Time to build a million levers. (Engineer)

>>31371805
>[ x ] Time to build a million levers. (Engineer)
Engineers OP.

>>31371805
>[x] Time to make pie. (Chef)
It's almost always one of the most useful professions in MMOs.

I'm also good with some kind of dancing subclass.

>>31371837
>>31371862
>>31371863
>>31371865
>>31371890
>>31371900

[+1 world destroyer]
[+1 metagaming]

>>31371930

Maybe we just want to build a highway or a nice bridge somewhere.

>>31371995
Or a wall. Maybe we'll just build a wall.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t8cELTdtw6U

>>31371995

>not building a bench

its like you don't enjoy sitting down.

>>31371930
>>[+1 metagaming]
I think that it should be the opposite, in Log Horizon world, engineers are gimped because of level cap for creating and using most "complicated" things being higher than the level cap.

>>31371930
>engineer
>world destroyer
you got a weird look on things

>quest is full of maymays
>ctrl+f "database"
>0 of 0
wtf guys, comon, OPor are you just keeping it up your sleeve for later

>>31372160
We aren't living in the database yet. Duh.

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>>31372160

Soon child soon

>>31372087
Collapsible pocket-benches. For all your portable sitting needs.

>>31372207

But all of those struts on the statue are going to corrode away in the next 200 years or so! People can make do with ordinary benches, but sooner or later somebody's going to get hurt if we keep pushing back those infrastructure inspections!

>>31371930
You meander past the merchant's quarter and past the all the people yelling for groups. Up on top of a ruined tower sits your player housing, which you use as your makeshift workshop.

Inside your tiny hovel sits a smelter, an anvil, a chair, a bed, and more levers than you'll ever need. Hardly anything, but you got it all on your own without anyone's help. Your character sits in his chair and begins smelting ore into bars. From the bars you make gears, and with the gears you make levers. You stick each lever on your ever decreasing wall space and then proceed to make another one.

Soon your engineer level increases and you lean back in your chair, staring up at the ceiling. You reach behind you to the light switch and flick it on and off, over and over again. You're not sure why, but you always felt a need to flip switches as you thought, much to the annoyance of all around you.

You close your eyes.

ON

OFF

ON

OFF

Perhaps you should not have yelled at your brother like that. It's not like it matters that his character looks like a whore.

ON

OFF

ON

OFF

You should probably apologize to him after his raid. It's probably starting now.

ON

OFF

ON

OF-

The light switch does not budge.

You instinctively open your eyes and turn to look at it. You see a metal lever, exactly like the one you just made. You look down and see...

[ ] You have the body of a dwarf.
[ ] You still look human, but your body looks completely different.
[ ] You've become a were-cat.
[ ] Other

>>31372244
dorf time, motherfuckers

>>31372244
>[x] You still look human, but your body looks completely different.

>>31372244
>[ ] You have the body of a dwarf.
You have to ask /tg/ if they want to be a dwarf?

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>>31372244
Forgot image.

>>31372244
>[X] You've become a were-cat.
Here kitty kitty

>>31372244
[x ] You have the body of a dwarf.

>>31372244
>[x] You still look human, but your body looks completely different.

Stick to the basics.

>>31372244
>[x] You still look human, but your body looks completely different.

We can't get enough of that mutagenic meat. Is that a thing in Log Horizon?

>>31372244
>[ ] Other
>[x]Fluffy tail

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>>31372235

>>31372244
>[ ] You've become a were-cat.

Nyanderful day

>>31372244
>[x] You still look human, but your body looks completely different.

>>31372244
We dorf now. This is /tg/, man.

>>31372244
>You still look human, but your body looks completely different.

>>31372351
>>31372330
>>31372308
>>31372306
>>31372281

[+1 human]
[-1 dorfy]

For shame, /tg/.

>>31372244
>You have the body of a dwarf.

>>31372391
Now I'm just sad. You failed me, /tg/.

>>31372391
>/tg/ picking something boring
What a shock. Well, at least it's better than dwarf, not by much but it is.

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>>31372391
You look down at your body. Plate armor, a big mace on your belt, a small buckler in your hand.

You look exactly like your character from Elder Tales, but... that's impossible right?

You jump out of your chair and go rushing over to a window. Below you is a ruined city in desert sands, all of which surrounds the giant statue.

What the hell is going on here? Are you stuck in the game? You begin to fiddle with levers.

UP

DOWN

UP

DOWN

Certainly this must be a dream, right? You slap your own face. Certainly does not feel like a dream.

You look to a mirror in your room.

[ ] Still human, thankfully.
[ ] You see the big ears of an elf sticking out of your head.
[ ] You see the tattoos of the Race of Ritual all over your face.
[ ] You see the mark of the Half-Alvs on your tongue.

Rolled 45

>>31372525
>[ ] You see the mark of the Half-Alvs on your tongue.

>>31372525
>[ ] You see the tattoos of the Race of Ritual all over your face.

>>31372525
[ ] Still human, thankfully.

>>31372525
>[ ] You see the mark of the Half-Alvs on your tongue.

Magitech here we come

>>31372525
>[X] You see the tattoos of the Race of Ritual all over your face.

>>31372525
>[x] You see the mark of the Half-Alvs on your tongue.

>>31372525
>[x] You see the mark of the Half-Alvs on your tongue.

>>31372525
>[x] You see the tattoos of the Race of Ritual all over your face.

Rolled 86

>>31372547
>>31372572

Race of ritual has really low HP. Not a good idea for a tank.

>>31372525
>[ ] Still human, thankfully.

>>31372525
>You see the tattoos of the Race of Ritual all over your face.

Who needs powergaming?

>>31372637
HARD MODE BABY!

>>31372525
>[ ] You see the mark of the Half-Alvs on your tongue.

>>31372744
>>31372637
Not to mention that it will make our healiness more effective. We will just have to heal-tank rather than face-tank.

>>31372744
Are you voting or commenting?

>>31372769
Commenting.

>>31372757
>>31372623
>>31372576
>>31372567
>>31372533

[+1/2 Alv]

>>31372769
If Im not mistaken, Half-Alv won by one. Unfortunately.

Though it was my second choice so I guess it is alright.

>>31372809
So, just out of curiosity, was there a way to get a fluffy tail without going were-cat?

>>31372942
Fox hair or whatever, but it's the worst race. They randomly swap one of their class abilities for another ability, which completely gimps them most of the time.

>>31372942
There was a kitsune race, good stats and all, but you lost a random skill from your class progression so people hardly ever took it for fear of not having one of their class's bread and butter or badass skills.

>>31372942
Back in the first race choice, Fox Hair would have been under "other".

It's another hardmode race since their skills randomly jump around when they level for some reason.

Worth it for the tails though.

Minor nitpick I just wanted to point out nearly everyone in game used the games built in voice chat, not some random third party app

>>31372999
Doesn't really matter now that Apocalypse has happened.

>>31372999
>built in VOIP
>not shit

Let's not stretch the limits of disbelief here.

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>>31372809
Yup. There it is. The mark of the Half-Alv.

UP

DOWN

UP

DOWN

You've seen enough anime to know where this is heading. You're stuck in the database and need to go punch some rogue AI in the face or something like that to get out.

UP

DOWN

UP

DOWN

You meander over to your chair. You'll need to sit and flip at least two switches to process all this. Your foot kicks the chair away from you. You are just not used to this body yet.

You stare at the chair for a while and then kick it again. It once again moves. Your lever flipping intensifies.

UP
DOWN
UP
DOWN
UP
DOWN
UP
DOWN

This game didn't have physics for objects. Does that mean that...

You pick up your chair and drop it. You turn it upside down and drop it again.

You pick up a lever and attach it to your door.

OPEN

CLOSE

You place your chair in front of the door and flip the lever. The door opens, launching the chair across the room.

Implications swarm your head, but your thoughts are cut off by screams coming from the city below.

[ ] Continue experimentation.
[ ] Investigate screams.
[ ] Other

>>31373019
Game came with near-flawless autotranslate to go with it, which carried over into the Catastrophe. It is quite a stretch.

>>31373019
Log Horizon takes place in 2020 or something, so okay VOIP is plausible.

>>31373054

Investigate screams.

>>31373054
>[ ] Investigate screams.

SHUT UP I'M TRYING TO PULL LEVERS HERE!

>>31373054
>[ ] Continue experimentation.

>>31373054
>[x] Continue experimentation.

Disregard screams, acquire knowledge.

>>31373054
continue experimentation

>>31373054
>[x] Investigate screams.
Oh boy, plot hooks.

>>31373054
>[ ] Continue experimentation.

We'll wait till someone else resets civilization, not the demon in glasses we the lever guy

>>31373054
>[ ] Other

First things first, check if we still have our dick.

THEN investigate the screams.

>>31373054
[ ] Continue experimentation.

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>>31372998
I just remembered a very fun fact about this, Prostitute was a legit secondary job. Whoever took both fox hair and prostitute is about to become EXTREMELY popular. The power of the fluffy tails cannot be denied!

>>31373054
Investigate the screaming, people are just now realizing what happened and are losing their shit. Not everyone can take these things rationally after all.

>>31373087
>>31373091
>>31373097
>>31373129
>>31373145

[+1 Knowledge]
[+1 Disregard]

>>31373054
Two levers at once? How lewd.

>>31373168
It is not prostitute.

It essentially boiled down to Diplomat, if the writer is to be believed.

>>31373168
But it's not actually prostitution.

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>>31373168
>Whoever took both fox hair and prostitute is about to become EXTREMELY popular.

"Prostitute" was a humorous mistranslation, I forget what it's supposed to be but it wasn't intended to be anything lewd.

Nureha just made it lewd when she took over a city by whoring herself to noblemen for unlimited dosh.

>>31373168
Wasn't it more like "courtesan" or something like that?

>>31373265
She didn't actually whore herself though, that's just what people assumed based on her back story. She probably did seduce a whole lot of them though.

>>31373054
>[ ] Investigate screams.

>>31373265
The name of the sub-class is Courtesan.

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>>31373179
>>31373219
Well now that everyone's online dick has become their real dick (and because I don't think STD's are a thing here) it's not gonna take long for the brothels to start popping up.

People have needs y'know, maybe we could start our own and channel pic related.

>>31373439
Good thing my epeen is way bigger than yours.

>>31373439
We'd have to install traps everywhere and get laying hands.

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>>31373174
You push the lever back down, closing your door to the outside world. Crybabies, that's what they are! You're the one stuck in this game, not them!

Experiment number two. You slam a lever on your chair, but the lever does not attach. You try again at the anvil and the same thing happens. It appears that the parameters for attaching levers to things has not changed; it only works on things that can change a binary state, like doors and chests in the open and closed states, and walls for decoration.

UP

DOWN

UP

DOWN

Experiment number three. You attach a lever to a lever, end to end. Changing one's state changes the other, almost as if they were really attached. You attempt to pull them apart, but they refuse to budge. You attach two more levers together to form the legendary QUAD LEVER. Strange, with how they act, it's almost like they're actually attached by gears or something.

UP, UP, UP, UP

DOWN, DOWN, DOWN, DOWN

Experiment number four. You smash the quad lever with your mace. Sacrifices had to be made of science. The contraption spills its gears all over the floor. Such intricate work all these gears have formed. You seem to be running low on levers now, so you attempt to pull one from the wall, but it refuses to move. After frustration takes hold of you, you smash it with your mace.

Part of your wall crumbles away, revealing the entire wall has hundreds, if not thousands of gears inside your walls. After flipping some more levers, you come to the conclusions that the gears do nothing, which is a bit of a disappointment.

You hear the in game ringing of a call. It's from Canis. He's probably worried because you didn't pick up on Skype, most likely because your body is slumped over the keyboard.

You pick up the call and before you can say anything you hear Canis yell out, "Are you okay!?"

"Oh, yeah." You respond, "I'm just stuck in the game."

"Everyone is!" He informs you.

UP

DOWN

UP

DOWN

>>31373718
"What?" You ask.

"EVERYONE IS STUCK IN THE GAME!" He yells at the top of his lungs, you assume. "Have you called your brother yet? Is he alright?"

You had not even considered your brother.

[ ] Call brother.
[ ] "I'm sure he's fine."
[ ] Other

>>31373757
>[ ] Call brother.

>>31373757
[] "I'm sure he's fine"

>>31373757
Im sure hes fine

Cue to a scene of him running around like a chicken with his head cut off.

>>31373757
>[ ] "I'm sure he's fine."
>[ ] Call brother.

Act like you don't care but do, it's the brotherly way.

>>31373757
>[x ] Call brother.
Idly wonder if he's stuck in his character's body and if he'll regret being a slut.

>>31373757
>[ ] Call brother.

>>31373757
[X] "I'm sure he's fine.
Find out what makes these levers work.

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>>31373495
I was thinking more the spy network/info brokering, whores have a long and distinguished history as spies. After a good lay people get awfully talkative for some reason. Maybe put a bar in there as well, the mix of booze and sex should loosen lips pretty damn effectively.

But yes, traps are always a good idea for any home base. Maybe with magic or the admin settings we can set them to only trigger on hostiles or people we don't know. With enough dosh and time we could possibly make our own instance for people to go into.

>>31373757

>Call brother.

"Er, let me get right back to you." If he was in the middle of a raid when this went down he may be in trouble, and we don't know that people respawn at this point.

>>31373817
>>31373811
>>31373807
>>31373804
>>31373797
>>31373789
>>31373782
>>31373768


[+1 Double option]
[+1 Brotherly concern]
[+1 Nonchalantitude]

>>31373817
>In the middle of a raid

JESUS CHRIST HOW HORRIFYING

Hopefully it was dragons or something and not something horrible and sanity-shattering like an undead-themed dungeon.

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>>31373884

While we're on the phone start building LeverCube.

I like how this dude is avoiding the problem by playing with levers.

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>>31373891
The undead wouldn't really shatter sanity. Now if they were in a mythos themed dungeon...

>>31373907
It's like he's actually /tg/ personified.

"World ending catastrophe? Nah, son. Levers."

>>31373891
Wouldn't matter either way since everyone was ported back to player towns, or within the area of the towns anyways.

>>31373926
Depends. Suddenly having a ghoul chewing on your spleen and being infected with Generic Raid-class Plague Debuff #573 (which is probably actually really terrifying in person) then dying as your healers spazz out and the tanks all go MORALE BROKEN might do it.

>>31373884
"I'm sure he's fine." You tell Canis, "I mean, he's got an entire raid to watch his back. Now if you'll excuse me, I've got levers to flip."

"Wha-" Click.

You open up your friends list instinctively. It only now dawns on you that you have the game's menu open.

The Log Out does nothing, you find out quickly.

Back to calling your brother, you select his name and click the phone symbol. It rings once and then hangs up. You try again and the same thing happens. You begin to spam the button until he finally picks up.

"I'M BUSY RIGHT NOW! NO, DON'T HEAD RIGH-" Click.

Huh.

[ ] Call Canis back.
[ ] Flip more levers.
[ ] Other

>>31373978
[X] Flip some levers outside.
Mix it up.

>>31373932
I could see us getting very experimental on what we can do with this, by what OP said we were messing about using our hands not the menus, so already figured out the whole you can do both thing.

[X] Flip more levers

>>31373978
>[x] Flip more levers.

Displacement activity at it's best. And if we shall not find adventure, adventure shall find us!

[x]Call Canis back.
[x]While flipping more levers.

We must make flipping levers into a nervous tic, so that we can fail at shaking blame when we inevitably manage to go Dwarf Fortress with something.

>>31373978
See what happens when you attach levers to natural objects, if possible.

>>31373999
Lets see what we can stick them too, and what else we can make.

Rolled 72

>>31373978
>[ ] Other

Go outside.

See what the commotion is all about.

>>31373978
>[ ] Other

Go outside and see what happens when you put a lever on a person.

>>31373978
>[ ] Flip more levers.

>>31373978

Assemble levers, call Canis.

>>31374001
This implies the eurofags figured out the whole "You can do shit normally" thing first, which would be hilarious if they/we end up with a mega capital. Just have Shiroe and the rest of Log Horizon walk in on some giant post-Industrial metropolis.

>>31373978
>>[ ] Flip more levers.

>>31373978
>[ ] Flip more levers.
>[ ] Other

Lets figure out the physics of this strange new world. By attaching levers to anything and everything and seeing what happens.

>>31374062
So it would just be like the real world then, with Europe heading through an industrial revolution while the rest of the world gets left in the dust.

Sweet.

>>31374020
Our eventual guild building must have a blood/lava/acid/various unpleasant liquids cannon, to deal with malcontents who are jealous of our mastery of levers.

>>31373288
>>31373301
A Courtesan IS a prostitute.

Do you mean courtier?

Oh dear. I just realized something. The Brazilians are loose.

>>31374149

Its a lot more than just a simple street walker though.

>>31374162
Oh, god help us all.

FLIP LEVERS

GET KNOWLEDGE

[+1 Flipping]

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>>31374131
BEGIN PROJECT "FUCK THE WORLD"

WE HORIZON FORTRESS NOW

>>31374108
Actually, that would be pretty sweet. when I watched the show, I was wondering how hard it would be to do pic related, which could solve the whole "Intercontinental Travel" problem.

>>31374170
Oh, well yes. A courtesan is basically the top tier for prostitutes. Their profession still revolves around getting fucked.

>>31374162
Oh FUCK ME.

I was going to say that we should stop trying to Dorf Fort everything, but we need to do it like twice as hard as we already are or else we won't be ready for when the ravening southron BR hordes finally overwhelm Mexico and begin their assault on us.

>>31374207

International waters are full of raid-tier monsters. God knows what horrors await us in the sky.

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>>31374162

>>31374239
It's up there with the flocks of raid-tier vorpal seagulls, or down here with the BR.

At least the seagulls can be reasoned with.

>>31374239
The clouds are made of cliff racers.

I, for one, highly enjoy our maximum autism engineer.

Flip more levers!

>>31374220
Don't forget about the Peruvians, the Russians, the Chinks or the Koreans, that are probably trying to turn the game in Starcraft Medieval Ver.

>>31374239
Well, like >>31374277 said, it's that or the BRs. I'm gonna go have a tea party with sky!Cthulhu and sky!Nyarlathotep, if that's ok with you, thanks.

>>31374287
Want to know what would make it better?
If we had fluffy tails to flip more levers with.

>>31374313
This, so much this.

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>>31374286

>>31374313
>>31374324
Nah, it's not necessary. We can always just join [Touch Fluffy Tail] later.

>>31374292
The Peruvians will fall to the Brazilians long before they become an issue, and all the others lack a convenient land route to our location.

Unless the Koreans rush Dropships we should be fine.

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>>31374162
PANIC!
BURN!
PURGE!
KILL!

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>>31374313
WE HAVE MADE A TERRIBLE MISTAKE!

>>31374356
Dear god, the thought that the people that would join that guild would be there never crossed my mind.
Fuck, I'd rather deal with BRs than them, those people are the worst and their guilds always manage to end up worse than No Fun Allowed or whatever they're called.

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>>31374188
You head outside while calling Canis. You only have about five levers left.

"He's fine." Is what you say when he picks up.

"Oh. That's good." He responds, "And you're not freaking out or anything?"

Experiment ... five? Lever does not attach to trees.

"Nah, not really. More interested in these levers."

Experiment 5b: Levers do not attach to dirt or rocks either.

"Levers?"

Experiment 6: Lever can attached to broken car door.

"Yeah. Leve- Ah!" You yell out. Flipping the switch caused the car door to ram right into your shins. "Son of a bitch! Fuckin' rusted... God damn..."

"Everything alright over there?"

"Yeah, just flippin' levers. You know how it is."

"Can't say I do."

Experiment 7: Lever can attach to broken car engine. Flipping lever does nothing.

"Wait, weren't you glitching through the floor?" You ask, "How'd you get out of that?"

"I fell into some kind of crazy dungeon. Fire and lava everywhere. Looked abandoned but it scared the crap out of me so I TPed back to town."

You look down at the remaining three levers you have and then back up to your home.

[ ] Wander into town
[ ] Create chair canon via doors and chairs
[ ] Other

>>31374366
>Unless the Koreans rush Dropships
Sound exactly what they're going to do and the Russian have a route to us, they just need to come from the Alaska. China can join either the Korean rush or come with the Russians, we are fucked either way.

>>31374427
>[ ] Other
Create lever cannon out of the car.

>>31374427
>[ ] Create chair canon via doors and chairs

Then sit on the chair. WE SHALL RIDE OUR GLORIOUS MOUNT TO TOWN, BROTHERS!

>>31374427
>Create chair canon via doors and chairs
WE MUST SECURE OUR HOME FROM INTRUSIONS.

>>31374416
Is that the GW2 guild?

>>31374427
>[ ] Create chair canon via doors and chairs

>>31374427
>[ ] Create chair canon via doors and chairs

Then go make more levers

>>31374427
>[X] Other
Flip levers.

>>31374427
>[x] Create chair canon via doors and chairs
Why not?

[x] Create chair cannon via doors and chairs and shoot self into town.

>>31374427
>Create chair canon via doors and chairs
Engineer does what an engineer wants to make

>>31374427
All this canon breaking but whatever
[ ] Create chair canon via doors and chairs

>>31374427
>[x] Wander into town
We need to buy/gather mats for more levers. A lot more levers

>>31374469
I think they were also in GW2, I mainly remember them from TERA. One of the worst ideas I've ever had when it comes to MMOs was actually joining them.

>>31374427

Can we create more levers in our home, or are we out of supplies? Return home and craft levers if possible, go into town to purchase supplies if not.

So our brother is a female dressed like a slut now?

>>31374427
>chair canon
>canon

God damn, I'm stupid.

Cannon.

I mean cannon.

>>31374489
Autistic lever kid does what he wants!

>>31374518
Stoop kid never leaves the stoop.

>>31374467
>>31374469
>>31374472
>>31374474
>>31374479
>>31374483
>>31374487
>>31374489

[+1 Artillery Expertise]
[+1 Take to the Skies]

>>31374427
>[ ] Create chair canon via doors and chairs
Question 1: Is fall damage a significant thing?

Question 2: If fall damages is yes, do we have any sort of slow-fall ability or item on our character?

Because if the answers are no or yes respectively, we should launch ourselves into town with the chairapult.

>>31374516
Oh, that makes things more interesting. I thought you were just failing to be funny.

>>31374518
I meant canon breaking as in people were unconscious then teleported, and then they woke up in town. So there would be no need to manually teleport out from a 'floor glitch'.

>>31374557
Cleric's Feather Fall is always an option.

>>31374572
Oh, right. Yeah, that makes more sense.

>>31374515
I think he was playing a female character since you don't normally call dudes slut. To my knowledge at least.

>>31374616

He could be a man whose only option for raid-tier armor was slutty bikiniplate. He said it was the only thing he could get on short notice, after all.

>>31374616
It's funnier if he's playing a male character dressed like a slut though.

>>31374572
I much prefer this version.

Being in the middle of doing stuff then suddenly WELCOME TO ELDER TALE, WATCH OUT FOR THAT MINOTAUR is way more amusing to me.

>>31374616
Mansluts are a thing.

>>31374616
So we can get him/her to call us onii-chan/sama now?

Rolled 64

>>31374643

Soon.

Unless he gets a sex change potion

>>31374643
Time to pray for a 6~7 month timeskip so it becomes instinctual.

>>31374643
Was our gender ever stated? I don't think it was, but I've missed things like that before.

>>31374548
You rush up to your house and get your chair, placing it in the doorway. With a flip of a lever the chair goes flying, tumbling down before it crashes into the ground. It looks to still be in good shape when you get down there. You hold a lever in your hand.

UP

DOWN

UP

DOWN

You remember all the cloth your brother had you store for him in your storage chest. With some sticks of wood you might be able to make a glider. You rush into your workshop and begin work. You have no idea what you're doing, but when you finish you have a chair attached to a piece of cloth. You place the vehicle-like object in your doorway.

[ ] Take to the sky!
[ ] This is stupid and will never work!
[ ] Other.

>>31374756
>[ ] This is stupid and will never work!
But do it anyway.

>>31374756
>[ ] This is stupid and will never work!

>>31374756
>[ ] Take to the sky!

>>31374756
>[ ] Take to the sky!

>>31374756
Should we hide our creations? People shouldn't figure it out yet. That you can manually do shit, I mean

>>31374756
[ ] This is stupid and will never work!
[ ] Take to the sky!

Nothing ventured....

>>31374756
[x] This is stupid and will never work!
[x] Take to the sky!

>>31374756
>[ ] This is stupid and will never work!
Time to fail in style.

>>31374756
>[ ] This is stupid, take to the sky anyway!

>>31374756
>>[ ] This is stupid and will never work!

>>31374756
>[ ] Take to the sky!

>>31374756
>[ ] Take to the sky!
>[ ] This is stupid and will never work!

>>31374788
>>31374789
>>31374791
>>31374794
>>31374803
>>31374807
>>31374809
>>31374810

Stupid is as stupid takes to the sky.

[+1 Sky Piracy]
[-2 Common Sense]

>>31374756
>>[X] This is stupid and will never work!

>>31374643
are you implying that somehow we couldn't when he was male?

>>31374796
Probably.

But I doubt we'll need to worry about industrial espionage on day 1.

>>31374843
>[-2 Common Sense]
Bah. It's not like that has ever helped.

>>31374843
[-2 Common Sense]
not like we needed that

>>31374885
Yes. It's common, and therefore valueless.

>>31373978
>"I'M BUSY RIGHT NOW! NO, DON'T HEAD RIGH-"
Did his voice sound normal?

>>31374948
Why wouldn't it?

ironic, being so dorfy, yet not a dorf.

like some kind of... dorfaboo.

>>31374843
Common sense was just holding us back.

>>31374904
Goddamn common sense clogging up our brain-inventory.

Glad we freed up some room, maybe we'll acquire some Rare sense soon.

>>31374963
Did Akatsuki have a girls voice when she was in a male body at the start? I forget. It'd be annoying if our new sister had a masculine voice

>>31374963
they're thinking of the wild genderflip hypothesis.

it would have been mentioned if we didn't recognize his voice, so it's a dumb question.

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>>31374616
Man, look at this! Our brother is such a sluttly Onii-chan.

>>31374948
IIRC the voice change is gradual and takes a while.

>>31375006
Her did and yes, your brother should have a masculine voice.

>>31375017
Goddamn Koreans, raid-tier armor is supposed to be made of metal and pauldrons! PAULDRONS I TELL YOU!

>>31375006
>>31375014
Everyone has their original voices (yes akatsuki had a female voice even as a male body). Personality and voice don't change at the very start, it's only noticeable by the 6th/7th month,

>>31374975
I like to think of this as our coping mechanism, i'm expecting us to suddenly wake up, think about that we just did, look at our door power hang glider, then let it hit us that we will never see our family again.

>>31375077
>we will never see our family again
>implying
We learned things from anime after all, we'll be back (if we want) after we beat the final boss

>>31375112
And who's the final boss?

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>>31374843

"Canis, you still there?" You ask, now realizing you never hung up.

"Yeah?" He responds

"You ready to see me take flight?"

"N...no?"

"Too bad."

You pull the lever and the door slams into the chair. For a few brief moments you are flying. The ground beneath you, the sky above your head. You are a majestic bird who has taken to the sky for the first time.

Then gravity has a say in the matter. You lose altitude fast. You try to lean the "wings" up to slow your descent, but it is no use. You notice someone on a rock and you scream, "Get out of the way!"

You hit the ground hard and your contraption breaks to pieces. As you get to your feet you notice an Elf is sitting on a rock, next to the wreckage, the name Symbology floats above her head, and beneath that is <Sweet Cake>. You have never heard of that guild before, but then again guilds were never much of your forte.

[ ] "You saw nothing."
[ ] "You saw EVERYTHING!"
[ ] "It's Symbolism. Symbology isn't a work."
[ ] Other

>>31375077
Yup. Right now we're focusing on anything but that. Unless we're really that autistic.

Or we have no friends irl and are living with our brother because we're orphans or something convenient like that.

>>31375154
>[x ] "It's Symbolism. Symbology isn't a work."
Full autistic engineer here.

>>31375154
[ ] "It's Symbolism. Symbology isn't a work."

>>31375154
>[ ] "You saw nothing."
>[ ] "It's Symbolism. Symbology isn't a work."

>>31375154
>[ ] "You saw EVERYTHING!"
>[ ] "It's Symbolism. Symbology isn't a work."

Aw yeaah

>>31375154
>[ ] "It's Symbolism. Symbology isn't a work."

>>31375154
[X] "It's Symbolism. Symbology isn't a work."
Never let them see you sweat.

>>31375154
>[ ] "You saw nothing."
>[ ] "Sweet cake? What kind of guild is that?"

>>31375154
>>[ ] "It's Symbolism. Symbology isn't a work."
I'm not sure what's going on in this thread but I want to go full autism.

>>31375154
>[ ] "It's Symbolism. Symbology isn't a work."

>>31375154
>[ ] "It's Symbolism. Symbology isn't a work."
This is the "we hit our head and are a little loopy" option, right?

Because Symbology is totally a word. It is not a work though, I'll give you that.

>>31375154
>[ ] "You saw nothing."

>>31375154
>[ ] "You saw EVERYTHING!"
>[ ] "It's Symbolism. Symbology isn't a work."
We need witness to confirm out autism

>>31375154
>[ ] "You saw EVERYTHING!"

>>31375228
>>31375216
>>31375212
>>31375198
>>31375187
>>31375174

[+1 Everything]

>>31375154
>Symbology isn't a work
>isn't a work
>a work
>work

Damn you hands!

Meant word.

>>31375254
Poor elf girl.

First she's trapped in a game, and now a clearly insane man on a not-so-flying chair falls out of the sky and starts babbling nonsense at her.