Twitter: @HeroRena>Last time on HERO QUEST!>We joined Rena as she tackled a rather difficult problem... Being completely broke. To remedy this she decide to take on the fearsome Spine Ravager. With her amazing skills she was able to defeat the A-Class Villain and make off with some money. Just in time to hang out with her new friend, Jade Revolver.>Rena then discovers a terrifying link between current events and Jade Revolvers fanfiction...>We now join someone who's not Rena and is doing something completely different.
>>31305552Oh crap, it must be AntiHero's point of view.
>Dark Witch EdgeMuder sits up and groans. Someone had called her name... The ex-Magical Girl feels as though she got hit by a truck after drinking massive quantities of alcohol.>Not the best feeling in the world...>Around her are balloons and get well soon cards, all from her mother.>She hears her name being called again.???: "Edge. Wake up. I'm breaking you out."
>>31305611is that Oscar the Grouch? You LOVE the muppets.
>>31305611huh, for someone whos body was on the part of tearing itself to pieces, you look in pretty good shape, Edgey.
>>31305665Wait till you see her in full.
>>31305611"Whoever you are, I am only going to warn you once. I feel like I got hit by a truck after drinking Finland under the table. I cannot promise that I won't inflict gratuitous violence on you."
>>31305611"What..?"???: "I'll be there in a second.">She hears the sound of thumping coming from the hallways. There are muffled screams and people yelling out stuff like 'Call Chet!' or 'Press the button!'. Their cries are cut short.>EdgeMurder's mind is hazy... She can't remember what happened to her. She doesn't even know why she's here. She barely remembers why the hell her name is EdgeMurder.???: "On your left.">EdgeMurder turns her head and sees someone. Her memories begin to return, slowly at first. The man there is a close friend of hers, The Broodmaster.BR: "Edge. Come on. We only have a few minutes before the other A-Class's get here. Let's go.""What..? Where am I?"BR: "No time. Come on."Ugh... I don't wanna go... I want to just lay here and sleep forever...
>>31305685that wasn't a complaint!
>>31305707"No. Fuck you. I'm comfy and you can't make me leave."
>>31305707Get up you lazy asshole.Your mom is waiting for you.
>>31305707But Wrestlemania is starting soon!
>>31305707He's a japanese vampire with haemomancy. He speaks in engrish.
>>31305707"But my feet huuuuuuuurrrrrt"
>>31305642huh, you were close.Apparently it's The Count.VUN TVO TREE HAHAHA
>>31305735Emphasis on 'fuck you'
>>31305755Will he carry us? We're so cute and fragile.
>>31305707Just tell him to leave you alone for a while.He of all people should recognize the recuperative value of sitting around like a useless lump feeling sorry for yourself.
>>31305707I don't think we have any powers any more
yes, demand to be carried like a princess!
>>31305707Demand that he carries you.
>>31305814wait. You have FRIENDS?That's not edgy. Thats not edgy at all.
WE HEROQUEST NOW
>>31305842That was a joke
>>31305707Get back to sleep. We're tired and our head hurts. He can come back during the visiting hours.
>>31305707demand to see your mother
>>31305707> BroodmasterSo he's a master brooder?
>>31305707Remember. REMEMBER THE KITTY.
>>31305937Or has a brood under his command.Probably both.
"I want my mommy..."BR: "No. No time for mothers. Come.""Fuck you... I'm comfortable here... Leave me alone..."BR: "If you don't get up I'll carry you out of here.""You better not..."BR: ".........."==================================="LET GO! LET ME GO! HELP! I'M BEING KIDNAPPED!"BR: "You are such a baby when you're sick... Come. We finally have a chance to get revenge from your loss.""My loss?"BR: "You do not remember? Magical Girl Sparkle defeated you again. But she is weak now. We will strike.""I... I don't really remember... I remember some red head and then... My head hurts."BR: "It will all come back."???: "Hey, you there! In the name of all that is manly, stop!"BR: "Fuck...">A Hero appears down the hallway and runs after them.BR: "I can't fight while carrying you... Do you think you can stand on your own or should we just run?"
>>31306030Let's run. This brooding fuck woke us up, -he- has to deal with the heroes.We need to save or strength to defeat Sparkle anyway.
>>31306030say you can standthen act as a hindrancebecause fuck this kidnapper guy
>>31306030Say that you can stand on your own, than jump into the arms of Chet Manlystache.
>>31306030Leg it.He fights like a girl anyway.
>>31306030Bury your head in Chet's manly chest.
>>31306030What are BroodMaster's powers anyway?Is he really good at brooding?Does he make others brood?Does he have a brood of something?
>>31306030Thats actually a pretty good question. Can you run?
>>31306030Run like the dickens.
>>31306030FIGHT HIM OFF
>>31306030Say you can stand, then just wander off while he's busy fighting Manly.
>>31306030Remember when I said I didn't want to go? Why would I help you kidnap me?
>>31306030Get up on your own and run, no way can we beat Chet when we are weak like this.
>>31306030wait, wasn't rena the one who stopped you, not sparkle?
>>31306030Run, Chet will murder you if you fight him head on.N-not that we care what happens to you, b-baka...
>>31306030Stand up, then run away. This was Broodmaster's great idea so he is welcome to deal with the downfall. Let's go buy ourselves some decent clothes first, we can't go about the town in hospital dress. We do have our phone with us yes? The HA wouldn't be as evil as to confiscate it?
>>31306030This guy is totally taking advantage of your amnesia.
>>31306030>BR: "You do not remember? Magical Girl Sparkle defeated you again. But she is weak now. We will strike.">>"I... I don't really remember... I remember some red head and then... My head hurts."
>>31306190Ya think? Seems to me that he knows Edge pretty well.
>>31306030Ask Chet for help.A kidnapper/molester is after you
>>31306161EdgeMurder was stopped by a Magical Girl and everyone knows there's only one of them around.
>>31306030If you're gonna run, run!I like how his expression hasn't changed at all.
>>31306214That's the best way to take advantage of amnesia!
"I can stand."BR: "Good. I will stall while you- HEY!">As soon as Broodmaster puts EdgeMuder down she run off. She can hear Broodmaster calling out to her and then the sounds of fighting. She makes her way out of the hospital and finds herself in a massive building. Heroes walk all around, only a few paying any attention to her.>She stumbles around trying to find the way out when she bumps into someone. A red head with an odd hat.???: "Oh, hey. It's you.""..."Why does she look so familiar...
>>31306263Ask where she got that hat
>>31306263>rena is wearing the Warmaster's capyes, YES!
>>31306263Time for friendship.Ask her if you've met before. She knows you from somewhere.
>>31306263Quick, ask her for help!
>>31306263Tell her she's cute.
>>31306263Wait a minute, that hat.
>>31306263We've more important things to do. Push her aside and grab her hat, we could use it as disguise until we get something more suitable to wear.
>>31306263fantasize about the pretty redhead
>>31306263That hat...Think about how cute she looks in the hat.
>>31306263Wait, what IS our powerset. We seem to have some odd fragmented recollections of some strage shit we've done, but those were just a dream, right?
>>31306263Wow, that hat makes me feel LEWD for some reason
>>31306393Oh fuck off.
>>31306382Go back to sleep Zalfo
>>31306382>Rena>Name derived from Greek Irene, Goddess of Peace
>>31306393Are people still beating that dead horse?
>>31306444Sorry man, them being in a hosoital is what clinched it.
>>31306263blush cutelystammer cutelyyell cutely
>The Dark Witch snatches the oddly cute redheads hat, pushes her away, and runs off.???: "Hey!">As she leaves the building she turns and makes her way into an alley. Broken glass and bits of rubble cut her feet as she runs but she doesn't stop. She feels that that building is her enemy and being in there any longer would lead to something bad.>And that redhead... There was something about her that the Dark Witch can't quite put her finger on.>The haze of painkillers and other drugs is starting to wear off but it still clouds her mind.>As she holds the hat in her hands she realizes she could do something with it...>She might be able to make it into something powerful, if she focused hard enough.>Or perhaps she could return it. If she felt any guilt for stealing it.
There is only one possible acceptable course of action.Keep running.Run past.Steal The Hat.Cackle insanely all the while
>>31306570UNLIMITED POWERGO SAVE BROODMASTER
>>31306570Does it fit?
>>31306570Remember your SCIENCE!.You were a witch once through it.You can be one again.
>>31306570>perhaps she could return it. If she felt any guilt for stealing it.Having your hat stolen sucks.Someone stole your hat.You'd feel guilty if this wasn't karmic balance.
>>31306570YOU GOT THE TOUCHYOU GOT THE POWERRRRRRR
>>31306570FOCUS HARD AND MAKE SOMETHING POWERFULPOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWER
>>31306570Nah, just wear it.Hey wait, is that a keyhole?
>>31306570Go for it. Do your magic. Maybe it'll help us remember.
>>31306570What's that symbol on the hat?Also, we should probably get our feet looked at. There's a hospital right there, and we can ask the cutie about her hat.
>>31306570>>Or perhaps she could return it. If she felt any guilt for stealing it.return it you thief!
>>31306570YOU REMIND ME OF THE BABETHE BABE WITH THE POWERPOWER OF VOODOO
>>31306570Return it. It would just tear you apart if someone stole your hat.
>>31306570If you make it into something powerful you could still return it later.
>>31306570>feel guiltremember you got your hat stolen, feel sadSAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAADDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD
>>31306570You had your hat taken, you know the pain.Give it back after giving it POWER
>>31306570She stole your hat, you steal hers.It's all good.
>>31306570While the hat is neat, you should give it back.Don't want people to think you're a filthy hat thief.
>>31306570Give it back, she might be torn up over having her hat stolen.
>>31306694Carlos I swear to God.
>>31306694you could say it would ... push her over the EDGE.
>>31306694Aren't you sharp witted?
>>31306570You should return it. It is bad to steal hats from other. Tell this to the red head as you return her hat.
>>31306570Ask yourself two questions. One, "What would EdgeMurder do?" Two, "Do we want to be that person?" EdgeMurder sounds like someone who would destroy a person's prized possessions just to be evil... or kidnap someone from a hospital... so no, we shouldn't be that person. Let's return the hat.
... Yeah. I'm not some kinda filthy hat thief. And I know I would feel sad if someone took my own hat.>The Dark Witch goes back to the building, feeling nervous the entire way in. She finds the redhead and hands her back her hat."Sorry about that."???: "Oh, it's fine. I was probably gonna chase after you to get it but this saves me time. How are you doing? Did they let you out of the hospital?""Uhm... Yes."???: "I was kinda worried about you after the fight. You were bleeding everywhere.""It was terrible."???: "But now you're all better, huh? Well thanks again for returning the hat.""It's fine. I felt bad for stealing it. Because stealing hats is wrong."???: "... Depends on the hat. Anyway I'll see you later.">She waves at EdgeMurder and walks off to a room marked Infirmary.>There is still no sign of the man who tried to kidnap EdgeMurder.>She wishes there was something she could do to get rid of that horrible buzzing feeling in her head.
Rolled 5>>31307090That's the NOT-DRUNK feeling.
>>31307090>She wishes there was something she could do to get rid of that horrible buzzing feeling in her head.try the bottle
>>31307090Ask the hospital staff about the buzzing. They should know what's up.
>>31307090WHAT HAVE YOU DONEYOU COULD HAVE GOTTEN UNLIMITED POWERYOU WASTED YOUR OPPORTUNITY
>>31307090Pringles. Maybe if we can find some Pringles, we could get this all worked out.Either that, or see if we can think of SCIENCE! to stop the buzzing.
>>31307090Call mommy. Surely she knows some pringles based remedy to cure you.
>>31307090>>She wishes there was something she could do to get rid of that horrible buzzing feeling in her head.Find the redhead again and lick her. It will help with your headache.
>>31307090Go see the doctor, you need to get your legs fixed.As well as get some answers on who you are.Get the redhead to accompany you, you could use some help here.And she seems nice.
>>31307090Follow the girl into the infirmary. Look for a doctor, tell him about the memory problem and the buzzing.
>>31307090Strong coffee is great for hangovers, so maybe it'd help with this? Just follow your nose to fresh-brewed coffee, girl.
>>31307090Get drunk.Alternatively, maybe some caffeine is what you need right now.
>>31307090So apparently we're not allowed to steal hats because Anon can't handle amusing Karmic justice in his quests.This leaves us with the option of either finding a hat or buying one.Something tells me you haven't got any money, Edgey. AmIrite?Find something else to use as a hat. I'm guessing you'll probably have to look in the trash.
>>31307090>the buzzingPlay with some knives.That will help the buzzing.
>>31307090You know, that mysterious girl looks really nice in that hat. I think she might have saved your life once.That, or she's a vampire that tried to drink your blood.Maybe she saved your life by turning you into her vampire servant.
I entreat you to look back upon yourself. You made a deal for power, for power comparable to the might of magical girls. It was borrowed power, and a deal made in folly that risked the innocent of this world and gave access and rise to the tyrant of another.You have spent years pursuing the ideal of being an 'Edgy' villain. You control knives. You cut. You want petty revenge against a woman whose only crime was stopping you and being a hero despite her own heavy burdens.What did power accomplish for you? Does it make you feel strong? Were you once weak and unable to stop someone from using their own strength to keep you from freedom or hurt you because they could?Truly, this world is cruel...but I offer you solemn advice. It is not too late. There is always a chance for forgiveness.Be better than those around you. Rise beyond the limits and want of the past.It is good you returned the hat>>31307090
ask around for Caffornator. her coffee can clear your head.
>>31307167>>31307171I don't see how this could possibly go wrong. Supporting for Caffornicator shenanigans.
>>31307090I don't think we're stil feeling comfortable with this building. I think it is best to head home and get a good night's sleep.
>>31307218in the meantime, steal something out of the garbage to use as a hat.Yes, that's what's listening to that faggot has reduced you to.Don't listen to that guy.
>>31307090Find someone that's paying attention and ask them what happened to you.
>>31307090Go back to sleep
>>31307090Go find a hospital and tell them you got a buzzing in your head.
>>31307279sloth. now that's a suggestion I can get behind!Maybe you could go find the tv room and watch The Muppets!
Yeah... Coffee sounds good.>>31307218Ugh... My head hurts too much to deal with moral stuff.. I just want some coffee and my mom..."I could really go for a cup of coffee..."???: "Did someone say coffee?">Out of the blue a girl appears and leans against a wall. She gives off this 'desperately trying to act cool' vibe.???: "Hehe. You came to the right place. Name's Caffornicator. S-Class Hero. You may have heard of me, hehe...""I don't think I have."CF: "Ah, whatever. Point is I can make you some coffee. Any kind of coffee. What would you like? Latte? Mocha? Straight black coffee? I can get you anything~""Maybe a latt-..."Wait. That hat. It looks familiar.
>>31307350Disregard hat, acquire coffee.
>>31307350>I HAVE SEEN MY HAT
Rolled 12>>31307350Ask for a latte served in that tiny hat.
>>31307350Ask for a latte and follow it by saying "Thanks a latte."
just as for some 'hot coffee'
>>31307350fuck hats girl. get some coffee.
>>31307350Ask her for a caramel lattewith extra caramel and then ask her to tenderly love you
>>31307350Let's not be sticklers to detail. Getting some coffee has priority. You need your fix.
>>31307350>she stole our damn hatHOW THE HELL DID YOU GET THAT?
>>31307350Just say "Yes"
>>31307350Black. Like the blackest night. Just like your soul.And ask her to get you to the infirmary, you need to get checked out after almost getting kidnapped.Also, where did she get that hat? It reminds you so much of the one you had before.
>>31307350Demand that she makes us the most magnificent latte known to mankind, to suffuse it with all of her art. If she impresses us, we might take her on her date.While she's distracted, steal that awesome hat....Or just say you'll go on a date with her if she gives you that hat.
>>31307350That hat. You know you want to steal it, you thief.
>>31307350"Screw the coffee, that hat!"
>>31307350Forget about the fucking hats. You need coffee and a phone to call your mom to pick you up.
>>31307350Flirt with caffornicator
>>31307436>>31307440Do we have ADD? We just regretted stealing one hat and returned it.
>>31307350you literaly just established that you weren't a hat thieftake the coffee
>>31307350Ask if you can have that hat. Say you'll do anything for it.
Reach for the hat. There's no way that gesture could be misinterpreted!
Rolled 7>>31307491No. This is OUR HAT!
>>31307350Trade a date for the hat.
>>31307350Give me a cup, as dark as night and as bitter as our regret.
>>31307491IT'S OUR HAT.
>ITT:>>31307445Yeah, I totally wouldn't use "screw" when talking with her. Especially not in imperative form.
>>31307350Remark that her hat looks an awful lot like ours. Let's not jump to conclusions, though. Heroes don't just steal things, right?
>>31307520>>31307551Nah we just have trouble with out kleptomaniac ways. That's her hat, surely.
>>31307551Why the fuck did Sparkle take the hat away from Rena and gave it Coffeetits? That makes me mad.
>>31307593Actually, sparkle accidentally destroyed it. Rena gave her that her.
>>31307491Nah, it's not stealing if Caffornicator trades it to us for a date.
>>31307593Chances are it's not the same hat.
>>31307606>Rena gave her that her.Hurr?
>>31307572That's the joke/point
>>31307627I am 95% sure Caffo has always had a hat.
>>31307606Oh, really? I must've forgot about that if that's really the case. Strange.
>>31307350Coffeetits confirmed for best girl.
>>31307642... Caffornicator is Edgemurder's long-lost sister!
"... Where did you get that hat?"CF: "Ah, a friend of mine gave it to me. So... What kind of coffee did you want?""Black. Like my soul."CF: "Haha, you're funny. Alright come with me.">EdgeMurder tries to follow Caffornicator but cries out in pain as her torn feet touch the ground. Before she can even complain she suddenly finds her feet cleaned of all debris and bandaged up. Caffornicator just smiles at her.>She takes her to a room marked with a massive S and sits her down. She pulls out two mugs and soon EdgeMurder can smell hot coffee.... It does seem really familiar though. I think I had one just like it... Wait, I did! I did have one just like it. But what happened to it? Was it stolen? Ugh... Maybe once I get some caffeine in my system it'll all come together.Wait, where the hell is the coffee brewer?
>>31307670>caffornicator>offering TEAbritbong pls go
>>31307709Oh. That's why nobody drinks her coffee.
>>31307716Caffornicator has many skills.
>>31307709This is getting pretty silly. Nevermind the coffee, go back to your room and back to sleep.
>>31307709You don't wanna know.
>>31307632That hat. Sorry.
>>31307709>Wait, where the hell is the coffee brewer?The coffee is actually her body fluids.
>>31307709I guess chat her up while she 'makes' the coffee. She seems nice enough, especially since she fixed our feet for us. Maybe ask her what she does here, where it is, etc.Oh, and trade hat for a date, of course.
>>31307709Details, details. Just drink the coffee, girl.
>>31307709She IS the coffee brewer.
>>31307740However we are assured that Caffornicator makes a damn fine cuppa joe.
>>31307709Just drink the damn coffee, you ask too many questions for an amnesiac.
>>31307709Don't think about it too much, you'll get a headache.
>>31307776>you ask too many questions for an amnesiac.and all the wrong ones too.
>>31307709Mention that it looks a lot like a hat you lost
>>31307709It's probably magic. Just forget about it. Like everything else you ever knew.
>>31307709>massive SSo we're, uh, in the area reserved for S-Class?
>>31307709You got that hat from a creepy guy in a cloak. It gave you magic powers, but it was also corrupting your soul. I think.
>>31307811Or the area reserved for massive sluts
>>31307709Ask for the hat.
>>31307851>It gave you magic powers, but it was also corrupting your soul.Edgemurder is still waiting to hear the negative part.
Yeah, I guess I shouldn't worry. It could be one of those prepacked coffee things or something.>She accepts the cup from Caffornicator and drinks. It's the best cup of coffee she's ever had in her life. Already she's starting to feel better as the haze starts to go away."This is good."CF: "Hehe... Glad you like it~ Soo~">Caffornicator scoots a bit closer."I like your hat. A part of me wants to steal it from you but another part wants to ask you if I can just have it. Can I?""CF: "Hehe... Well it was a gift so you can't have it but you can try it on. I think you'd look pretty cute in it~">Caffornicator lends her the hat.
>>31307709"If I'd asked for cream, where would it have come from?"
>>31307961Let's find a mirror. We know we will look utterly stylish in it, but let's satisfy our vanity and have a look.
>>31307961How does the hat feel?
>>31307709Aww, Caffo bandaged us. She's so sweet. Gross, but sweet.Fill her in on what you know over coffee. You remember a redhead, a hat that looks exactly like the one she's wearing, and then waking up in a hospital before that guy busted in to save you.Maybe if she lets us wear the hat it'd refresh our memory or something.
EdgeMurder is pretty cute when she's not edgy.
>>31308094Caffo has noticed
>>31308174That's a long string of anal beads.
>>31308021"Is there a room with a mirror nearby?"CF: "Hehe... Well, there's my personal room."Can I go try this on real quick in there? Alone?">Caffornicator grins and walks her over to the room. She lets her inside and closes the door behind her.>Once she's inside the dark witch puts the hat on her head. Her memories come flooding back as the haze of drugs meant to keep her calm is washed away.>She finally has her hat (top) back. With it come her powers and the memories of her previous battle.Oh... That little redheaded bitch... She's the one who stole my hat from me... And Sparkle... She thought she was so awesome with her fancy sparkly magic... Well her focus has already been broken once. Only a few more times until it's gone forever...>Someone knocks at the door.CF: "Everything alright in there?"
>>31308209Join up with Broodmaster and beat the shit out of EVERYONE. You have him around your finger, after all. He's a great meatshield, right?
>>31308209Remove the hat and let yourself be seduced by Callifornicator.
>>31308209You were way cooler without the hat. Don't be a shit.
>>31308209Step out like that, tell Caffo that everything's okay, and begin complaining about your life over coffee.
>>31308209Just go drink more coffee with coffee waifu. Stop being an octoshit
>>31308209So Dark Witch, why are you so damn edgy?seriously, you could be a villain and not literally cut yourself on that edge.thats not good for your conplexion yo.
>>31308209Can you take on an angry Monster Marauder? No? Then I recommend you not do anything with Sparkle. Like... Ever.
>>31308209fly the off with the hat with revenge in mind.TO GLORY
>>31308209You were a lot cuter without the hat, you should take it off and go visit your mom.
>>31308209Remove hat. Pretend all is normal. Drink your coffee. This is a golden opportunity to gain information about the enemy- Broodmaster did say that Sparkle was vulnerable right now...Besides, the coffee really is great.
>>31308209"Oh, more than okay!"Time to get our ass kicked or tenderly loved by Caffornicator>ntrLab setTHAT'S THE WORST LAB
>>31308209Don't respond, only laugh. But make it an evil laugh.
>>31308209Ask the person to wait a minute then escape via window.Also, tell us, how do you feel now?
>>31308209We lost a great character and got EdgyMurderShit instead.Fuck you anon.Fuck this.
>>31308209"Yes, yes, we're perfectly fine. Hey, do you know a certain redhead, we need to find her... I think she's still here in the building."
>>31308209>There's a hole in her chestBAHAHAHAHAHHAOh GOD. I just noticed that. I'm dying, edgemurder. Dying of laughter.Could you ape Bleach any harder?
>>31308209Get rid of the hat. The hat only brings you despair and unhappiness. It is not a nice hat.
You've got hat magic right?Give Caffo a decoy hat.They'll never even know you're back in business.Actually, who's your mother?
>>31308322Isn't it Pringle Guard?
>>31308209Attempt to ape Bleach even harder
>>31308209Laugh evilly and show that caffeine fiend who's boss.
>>31308209You can't beat Sparkle now. You don't have any Magical Girl powers. Rena is probably too strong too, but go ahead and try to beat her up in retaliation for stealing your hat.
>>31308209Take off the hat. You're way happier being cute then being an unpleasant person.Cute girls are always happiest.
>>31308209go out and back up your friend.i'm sure the hat has no sentimental value to that slut at all so take it and keep it for now until you find your old one.
>>31308209Get rid of that stupid hat. It's stupid and bad and stupidbad and badstupid.
>>31308341Where would she get a Get Well Soon card?>>31308356Actually, more importantly your edginess was litterally flaying you apart last time.That seems like a drawback.Also, coffee.
>>31308302Thank you, I shall take pride in my accomplishment, no matter how small it be.
>>31307709Now I want to know where the cream comes from.
>>31308209remove hat, return it to Caff
>>31308209Poor Caffo, she never catches a break.
Rolled 16>>31308424From her magical genie husband/a gift card shop.She did escape at the end, ya know.
>>31308424The store, like everyone else?
>>31308467I bet she was happy just serving coffee too. Maybe even thought she found a friend. Truly her life is pain.
>>31308467Being Caffo is suffering.
>>31308209Look how many friends you got when you werent being an edgy little shit. Are you sure you want to go back to that life?Why not show up Sparkle by being a better hero than she could ever hope to be? That way you could show the world that you've both sunk lower and risen higher than she ever could.Cmon, Edgemurder, you have a chance to pull a Revan here. Don't waste it.
>>31308513>a chance to pull a Revan hereYou mean have all your character development stripped away for the sake of a convienient retcon and edginess?
>>31308513Screw that, we've been slighted and humiliated by that redhead, and kept in drugs. This screams for vengeance. We're miss EdgeMurder, not miss SafetyScissors.
>>31308209If you make Caffornicator sad again your life will become the worst of all hells. It will break you worse than any beating Sparkle ever inflicted on you.
>>31308209>>31308513Be the Revan
>>31308573>implying KOTOR didn't develop the fuck out of Revan as well as de-edge his stint as a sith
>>31308620>Implying TOR didn't just fuck that over
>>31308620KOTOR 2, rather
>>31308637>caring about TOR>ever
>>31308637Ah, I remember gibbing Revan while playing the Imperial Agent class storyline. The MMO was shite tho.
>>31308209Hey, Rena saved your life. You were bleeding out, and even though you attacked her and her best friend, she gave you back your focus so you could heal yourself. It would have been safer to just let you die, but she saved you anyway.
I will not remove this hat. I can finally see clearly now. Whatever this hospital did to me has been reversed and I will finally have my revenge against Sparkle."Oh, I'm fine... Better than ever.">She leaves the room and begins to walk off to find Broodmaster and end Sparkle."Sorry, I got to cut off. I'll see you later."CF: "Okay... But I'm taking my hat back.""Touch it and I will slice your hand off of-">Caffornicator takes it off.... What was I doing?CF: "If you wanna go you can go but I'm not gonna let you take my hat. Also how did you change clothes so fast? I couldn't even see it."Wait, okay! I remember, I think. I need that hat or else I can't get my powers back and... Do something with them. Something evil, I think.But the lure of coffee is strong...Drink coffee, forget about edgy issues.Make evil plan to steal hat back.Other.
>>31308701>Drink coffee, forget about edgy issues.
>>31308701[X] OtherGO THE FUCK TO SLEEP.
>>31308701>>Drink coffee, forget about edgy issues.
>>31308701>[X]Drink coffee, forget about edgy issues.Don't be edgy. Nobody likes an edgy bitch.
>>31308701>Drink coffee, forget about edgy issues.
>>31308701>Other.Does it have to be THAT hat?You seemed to think you could do something with the hat you stole from the Redhead earlier.Can you like, focus power in new headwear on a whim and turn it into a new "your hat"?
>>31308701Drink coffee, plan Revanlike redemption-through-amnesia
>>31308701>Drink coffee, forget about edgy issues.Talk with your new friend. Maybe ask if she can make you a new hat matching her own. You can be hat buddies!
>>31308701>drink coffee, forget about edgy issues.Because goddamnit, Caffornicator is -not- suffering!
>>31308701[x]Drink coffee, forget about edgy issues.[x]Find a better, cuter hat. Maybe a beret.
>>31308701Drink coffee, forget about edgy issues.Have identity crisis. Cry on Caffornicator's shoulder.Inb4 the hat is the only way DWEM can survive the thread.
>>31308701> [x] Drink coffee, forget about edgy issues.Ask her about hat hat. Something about it makes you want to do evil stuff.
>>31308701>Drink coffee, forget about edgy issues.Evil is overrated. Finish your drink and ask for a phone to call your mom. She must be worried sick by now.
>>31308701You drink that coffee, young lady. Drink it up.Clear your mind without the hat, and you will see the naked truth. Your powers corrupt you, do not rely on them. Be your own woman!
>>31308701>[X]Drink coffee, forget about edgy issues.http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KxwcQ1dapw8
>>31308764Is Edgemurder your given name?
>>31308701 Other.Steal every OTHER hat in the city for yourself.
>>31308701>>31308796>Cry on Caffornicator's shoulder.>Let her comfort you>Sexually
>>31308701>Drink coffee, forget about edgy issues.Stop being an edgyshit.Nobody likes edgyshits.Even the anon who wants you to be edgyshit for their momentary enjoyment will soon get bored and shun you for being an edgyshit.
>>31308701you beat sparkle by hitting her when she was leaning in to heal you, if you fight her again she'll probably just leave you to bleed out at the bottom of a crater.
>>31308775Berets don't work on long hair. She needs something with a wide brim. Maybe a straw hat and a Hawaiian shirt. If there's one thing I know, it's that Hawaiian shirts can de-edge the edgiest of edgehogs
>>31308818Nah, her real name is Sparklestar.
>>31308701>[x]Other."The hat urges me to... do things. Things I wouldn't want to do without it. I feel its call. On one hand, I want it. On the other... maybe I shouldn't. You don't feel anything strange about it?"
>>31308871>it's that Hawaiian shirts can de-edge the edgiest of edgehogsThe day they make a Hawaiyan hat will truly be a glorious day.
>>31308876Wrong, it's Pringles.>>31308818She's the daughter of Pringles Guard, so likely not.
>>31308701>Drink coffee, forget about edgy issues.coffee is the new beer now.
>>31308901>The day they make a Hawaiyan hat will truly be a glorious day.Straw hats pretty much are that.
>>31308701Drink coffee, try to become a better person.
>>31308871How old is EdgeMurder? We could have her and Jade go hat shopping.And what's her real name anyway?
>>31308701>[x]Drink coffee, forget about edgy issues.I do caffeine, nana nananana!
>>31308961If by better you mean cuter, yes.
>>31308985Man, how do you get your lines so smooth?
>>31308985Why is JR such a qt? She's like 12, it should be illegal for someone that young to be this cute.
>>31308985I like the suggestion Sparklestar.With the addendum that her given first name is actually "Princess".This is why she became Dark Witch Edgemurder, because she literally couldn't stand the name.
"That hat... It calls to me. It makes me want to do things that I don't think I would normally do... But when it's off. When the top is popped... I feel like myself again. So... Just keep it away from me and let's drink some coffee."CF: "Hehe, no problem cutie~"My real name is Olivia Gamble Guard. And I think right now I'll just relax and drink.>Olivia drinks some coffee and relaxes.I don't know. Maybe it would be better if I just forget about the past and start again."Do you have any cream for this?"CF: "Hehehe..."
>>31309042>when the top is popped
>>31309042>creamNo! We must stop it!
>>31309042>when the top is popped>do you have any cream for thisWe're shooting beyond happening you guys
>>31309021She just is. That's her superpower, being the cutest.Besides looking into parallel universes.
>>31309042>My real name is Olivia Gamble Guard.Of course, that's not bad either.
>>31309042>We now join our Hero as she travels outside of the city with Raindrops and Queen of the World."So.... This is it?"R: "That's what the maps say.""Lord of Death lives here?"R: "Yep.""In this mountain base that's shaped like a skull?"R: "Mhmm.""And why can't I go meet Threepunch-Man?"R: "He's harder to find.""... What do I do if the Lord of Death tries to get all.. Murdery?"R: "I can't really say. Sparkle said you should be able to handle yourself."
>>31309042>when the top is popped>Olivia gamble guardooh myy gooooooooooodpretend caffornicator is your pringle lover
>>31309116Maybe he's a pirate?If so, you have nothing to worry about. You have no booty.
>>31309042Your mother is a great woman.
>>31309093And being flawless sharpshooter.
>>31309135Rena has booty.Just no stacks of loot upstairs.
>>31309042What is your father's name?
>>31309116QotW: "Peasant Rena. If it will help you you may BORROW Hissy.""You're letting me borrow something of yours?"QotW: "Yes. Borrow. That means you must return it or I kill you."R: "Queen, that's not quite what it means."QotW: "Oh. Return it or I break your legs."R: "No it... Look, Rena. Just take it and bring it back. Maybe it'll help or maybe not. If there's anything else you think you'll need just ask."
>>31309135God dammit, I shouldn't have laughed, but I did.
>>31309158also she's best friends with all the heroes.Is her real name Mary Sue?
>>31309116Fuck. Switch to the /serious/ stuff just when it was coming to the good part.
>>31309177Holy fuck, QotW is the cutest thing ever.
>>31309177O-oh my, such a dashing hairstyle there Queen!
>>31309177Thank Queen. Ask what this Hissy can do?
>>31309177>R: "Queen, that's not quite what it means."Nice haircut queenie.Rena, take hissy and go find SuperDeathMan.
>>31309177Compliment the glory that is her side ponytail as you borrow Hissy. 'Casue damn she is adorable.Then go face this guy with all the bravery we can muster. I mean, we managed to make friends with the Spine Ravager right? This should be a piece of cake.
>>31309177"Uh, thanks. So, is Hissy a stick, a snake, or what?"
>>31309177O-oh, the queen of my heart! You look radiant today.
>>31309177Aw, thanks, Queenie. You're the best. Give her a hug.So, how does Hissy work? And does the QotW know you apparently got your powers back?
>>31309177Fair enough. I mean if you get unable to return it, you'll most likely be already dead. So someone breaking your legs won't even bother you.Anyways, we're sure you can manage, will do well and survive despite the odds.Now J-j-j-j-j-jog it in!
>>31309162Then she's in no danger whatsoever.Pirates are known for digging chests.
>>31309187Nah, she just has plenty of positive qualities to make up for the fact that she's irredeemable fujoshi.
Why is noone posting Queen hairstyles?
>>31309177Okay, do we know anything about this guy's backstory? What sort of things has he gotten up to previously?We know he can kill people with a touch; what other powers or weaknesses does he have? We aren't here to fight, but it'll be good to know in case he attacks us.Also, where will those two be while we're talking to him? We'll want an escape plan in case things go badly.
>>31309177compliment queen about haircut.whine endlessly about own safety.
>>31309307Ask and ye shall receive.
>>31309370>what other powers or weaknesses does he have?Re-read the first thread.
>>31309415larro plsmore long hair characters
>>31309177why is queen wearing glasses now?
>>31309415Ponytail and vanilla are best. Long comes in second.
Rolled 9>>31309479To not control anyone.
>>31309479They're Mystic Eye Killers
>>31309479There's an entire thread about it. You should read it. It's really really good (and a bit dark)
>Rena thanks Queen of the World and takes Hissy. The Queen explains that she simply needs to throw the staff and her snake familiar will appear to assist her. Also if she gets one scratch on it she will hate her forever.>Raindrops wishes her the best of luck. She explains that there is little info on the man other than his powers. He is simply listed as the most powerful villain. Only Big Boss knows anything about him and he won't give away any information. If the Lord of Death enters the city the only plan of action is to either hide or throw a bunch of low rank Heroes at him til he leaves. Rena sighs and walks off with Raindrops watching as she enters Skull Mountain..>The path inside is fairly straight forward and well illuminated by torches hanging from the walls. Bones decorate the archway to a massive chamber. It is mostly empty save for two blazing braziers and a massive throne made of bone and metal. Someone sits on top and looks down at Rena.LD: "Who dares enter my chamber?"
>>31309479She promised to stop using hypno-gaze, the glasses block it so she doesn't accidentally some people.
>>31309479Did you miss previous threads? Queenie went exploring with Raindrops, discovered her dark and terrible past, and quit using her mind-control powers. The glasses block them in case she uses them accidentally.
>>31309479>Hi, I don't read
>>31309531Say hi. Introduce yourself. Be nice and polite.
>>31309415Is that Kitty in the Up-Do? Does that mean that AU Queenie has an Up-Do
>>31309531Hi, I'm Rena, and there's some shit going down.`
>>31309531"Um, hi there, how are you? I'm Rena, from the city."
Rolled 2>>31309531I roll for /u/
Rolled 19>>31309479Because meganekko are the hottest.
>>31309531Respond the following:"Hi! I am Rena."
>>31309531Uh, hi. I'm Jade's friend?
>>31309531>LD: "Who dares enter my chamber?""Hi, I'm Rena. Sorry to bother you but because of some parallel univese shenanigans our whole world is in peril and we need your help saving it."
>>31309531In b4 LD is Rena's father.
>>31309531"Uh, hello, I'm rena".hold your bag up"I brought, uh, gameboys. And one of those pizzas."
>>31309531Well? Go ahead and introduce yourself then Rena!
>>31309531Say hello and ask if he don't get bored in a place like this.
>>31309578Jade's father was Void, not this dude.
>>31309595You just blew my mind.
>>31309531"Hi, I'm Rena. You may have heard Jade talk about me before. I was just in the area and wanted to say hi, and ask if you would help save our dimension from destruction."
>>31309578Jade's dad doesn't approve of her interest in Heroes. So we better not bring that up unless asked to.
>>31309573YOU FOOL, HAS THIS QUEST TAUGHT YOU NOTHING!?
>>31309531Make sure to smile reassuringly. Use your cuteness!
>>31309531Introduce yourself properly, apologize for disturbing him, please don't kill us, but we need your help.
>>31309531Hey, I'm Rena, and there's a villain out there who's trying to take over your spot as the greatest evil/source of destruction on the planet. Want to help defeat her so you can keep your throne?
>>31309595C'mon, this isn't Star Wars.
>>31309595But that would mean that Jade is Rena's sister.Oh god... all those fanfics...
>>31309627>>31309578>>31309667Wrong villain. The Void is Jade's father, this is Lord of Death.
>>31309663I suspect he might be the original OnePunchMan or nearest alt-dimensional equivalent, though.
>>31309667Jade father is Void and not Lord of Death.
>>31309531"Hi there, did you like that Phantom comic too?"
>>31309663>>31309667>implying /u/ boats are allowed anywhere on Larro's wild ride.
>>31309673Whoops. Okay, scratch that part about Jade, otherwise it should be fine, right?
>>31309531Does he just sit there the whole time waiting for someone to turn up?
>>31309700Yet they are lured to it like moths to the flame of lantern... only to sink one by one.
>>31309708But that's what every BBEG does, brood in their throne room until the Heroes arrive for the final battle.
>>31309724>sinking /u/boats quest
>>31309708Man, that's sad.He must be bored out of his mind. Did we bring any games with us?
>>31309757actually different idea:What if LD is future Garou?
>>31309781I don't think larro is actually carrying over any characters, just namedropping
"H-hey... I'm Rena. I uh... I brought some DS's and pizza.">The Lord of Death gets off of his throne and begins walking towards Rena. Each of his steps echoes in the chamber as he gets closer and closer...> He reaches the terrified Hero and stares at her.LD: "You come to the Lord of Death's chambers simply to offer to play some games and eat junk food?"
>>31309933Life has nothing better to offer.
>>31309933Oh god is that Drew?
>>31309933Damn it, I knew I forgot the drinks.
>>31309933"Um, well, I don't really know what kind of things you like, so I wasn't sure what to bring as a... peace offering."
>>31309933I came to ask you for help. The city is threatened by something that took out several A and S class villains by itself. Are you a deathly enough lord to save the city?
>>31309933Yes, you probably get bored staying in a like this all time.
>>31309933>Oh sorry, maybe you don't have a digestive system? I don't really know how, uh...authentic you are, so to speak.
>>31309933Yeah, kinda. You seemed bored sitting on that throne all day, so I thought I'd see if you were up for a bit of gaming.
>>31309933[peeing into pants intensifies.png]U-um, they're gifts, there's also the small matter of the end of the world to discuss...> nervous eyousaycaptcha's onto it
>>31309933A hero's gotta get some respite somehow.
>>31309933"Well, just to start with."
>>31309933"Yeeeeeess? Oh, darn, I should have brought some hats too."
>>31309933well uh not exactlyI wanted to persuade you to help kill this alternate universe version of me that's ridiculously strongthese were the best bribes I could think of
>>31309933"Well, not exactly, but telling you that the whole world is in peril and will be destroyed unless I convince you to help us right off the bat seemed rude."
>>31309933Sorry, did we mess up? We'll go back, no biggie.Does he want to go shopping with us? That way he can tell us what he wants.It'd probably be nice to get some fresh air in here as well.
>>31309933"Not JUST to play some games and eat junk food, but also to get to know you."
>>31309933"I-I came to m-make friends w-with you."
>>31309933You should probably tell him about the alternate dimension crisis.
>>31310038"No, but It's kind of a long, boring story the likes of which I imagine you've heard a lot of times before?The video games and pizzas are definately the best bit."
"Not JUST to play some games and eat junk food, but also to get to know you."LD: "Just get to know me? Human, I am the Lord of Death. You do not 'get to know me'. You die. And now... Wait, do you have the new Mario Kart?""Y-yeah..."LD: "Then you do not die. Yet. Let us play a few rounds first.">As they sit down and play the DS Rena explains to the man about how there is an evil alternate version of her and how everyone needs him to come help take Evil Rena down.LD: "I could take this person on by myself. Surely you are not implying that I alone am not sufficient? Ugh... Stupid blue shells... What kind of hacks are you using in this game to win every round?""It's just skill. And no, I'm not saying you're not strong enough but I'm sure even you could use some help every now and again."LD: "I have never needed help to take others on and I never will."
>>31310086Rena, stop shuttering, for one you don't even know what tsundere is, not to mention you actually DO want him to save the world right now.
>>31310123Ok, so everyone is going there to watch you while you beat NegaRena and see how awesome he is.
>>31310123"What if she cheats?"
>>31310123"It's not about needing help, it's about not wanting to do everything alone, even if you could. Like this game. It's always more fun with friends."
>>31310123It's for security.Evil Rena has stolen the power of many heroes and villains in other dimensions and her power level is unknown.
>>31310123Just because you don't NEED help doesn't mean it's not more interesting with friends.
>>31310123She's kind of a parallel me. You know how I'm pretty much mostly harmless? She's apparently from a dimension where everyone is a badass.There's very good odds she stole the alt-you's powers and then killed him. If he's lucky.we... kind of might need everybody, all at once? I mean, I'm open to suggestions here. Death is kind of your department. I mostly just steal hats and throw rocks."
>>31310123Her fighting ability is the same with my ability in Mario Kart... you're losing every round.
>>31310186Yeah, this.Isn't he bored of sitting here? This place needs cleaning, fast.
>>31310123Oh come on, it'll be a fun experience! How can you say no if you've never tried it before?
>>31310123Rena maybe you should give him a pity round. And tell him evil Rena steals powers and it would be super bad if she stole his powers and that's why it doesn't hurt to have backup
>>31310123Suppose she beat you in an alternate timeline and took your power. Could you beat somebody with your power plus all the other powers ever?
>>31310123Say that you were planning to ask Three Punch Man as well.
>>31310123Their is no such thing as overkill?Surely you know that, we all know you can probably take care of it easily but it never hurts to have insurance
>>31310123"Yeah, but look at it this way. I could win races in Mario cart without anyone else, but it's more fun when I do it with friends."
>>31310123It seems that Evil-Me has dominated her home universe entirely. That could mean that she's found some way to neutralize you or otherwise circumvent the need to fight you in that world. She can also steal powers. Even if there's a small chance that you might lose, that's still too big of a risk to take.
>>31310123"You can't even beat me at mariocart alone. Clearly you need help."
>>31310123"Hey, you're, er, pretty good at this game. How often do you get to play?"The point is to find out what his lifestyle is like in general. I'd imagine he lives alone, but he might be offended if we ask him directly.
How do we hook Rena up with Lord Death?
>>31310186>>31310197There is a sex joke to be made but I realise Rena is too pure for that.
>>31310296Are you suggesting she cheat on Spine Ravager?
>>31310123Um, do you have a family, Death? I mean, even Monster has a family though he's creepier than you.
>>31310260Bad idea. Don't threaten his ego. He's obviously very proud of his ability to kill anyone, and appealing to reason won't change his mind.
>>31310296Easily. We don't.
>>31310123"Never? Really? That's pretty impressive. How long have you been doing the Lord of Death thing?"
>>31310322Won't change the fact that we kicked his bony ass.
>>31310296Hooking Rena up with people is NOT the challenge. Finding someone Rena WANTS to be hooked up with, that's the tricky bit.
>>31310123Oh yeah. Rena how'd that thing with Spine Ravager go?
>>31310123Does Lord of Death do his own laundry, cook his own food and clean his own house then? If so, why not hire a maid?
>>31310365oh yes.tell us about the spine date.
>>31310347>we kicked his bony ass.Not like Rena is the one to speak about bony asses.
>>31310369he has one, she's called Maid of Death.
>>31310123"It's not a matter of needing the help. Sometimes, it's good to play with others."
>>31310386"Did he do something bad?"
>>31310386We haven't met three punch man yet.What's he like?
>>31310365Eh............"Yeah, but look at it this way. I could win races in Mario cart without anyone else, but it's more fun when I do it with friends."LD: "It is not the same.""Not the same but similar. I know you could probably beat her up but why not have backup or people help you? I think you'll find fighting with others fun."LD: "... Perhaps.""She's really powerful, too. Like... We think she has the entire world she's from under her control. So there's that."LD: "Hmm...""And I'm gonna go get Threepunch-Man to help us out too.">He drops the DS.LD: "Theepunch-Man?""Uh huh."LD: "If he is coming then I will not join. Not if that... Jerk is there."
>>31310386"Oh man, that sounds like a story."
>>31310418What? Why do you hate 3 punch man?
>>31310386Haven't you been fighting with him long enough? Wouldn't it be nice to have a change of pace? Like, have time for your hobbies instead of fighting him?
>>31310386Did I say Threepunch man? sorry, I mean Treepunch man.Also, it would probably be a good idea if you came under an alias so that Evil Rena doesn't know who's she's fighting.
>>31310418You two fight all the time, don't socialize, and have a rivalry.Are you brothers?
>>31310386"Why not? It'd be a perfect opportunity to prove that you're better than him. And if you didn't, he'd probably bug you about not having the guts to do what he did."
>>31310418"What if I get him to not be a jerk?"
>>31310418okwe can drop that loser if you wanthe's apparently super hard to find anyway>I told you nerds not to mention 3punchman
>>31310418Aw, but what better way to show you are better than him than when you are fighting together? If you get the kill, then you'll both know that you are the better fighter!
>>31310386"What is he like?"
>>31310418Why? What happened?Did he break your heart?
>>31310448So much this.
>>31310446we better sort it out now than let them unexpectedly meet each other once shit it about to hit the fan
>>31310418I'm going to assume your reluctance means Spine Ravager isn't a very good kisser.
>>31310418Have you tried sorting out your differences with him? I hear you are fighting all the time. That can't be good.
>>31310418"I haven't even talked to him yet, and if you agree to join, it may not even come down to that. But I don't want to take chances. What do you have against him, anyway?"
>>31310448Manipulative Rena is best Rena.
>>31310504I did not kiss him! "Why not? What happened?"LD: "It is none of your concern.""Come on, tell me."LD: "No.""Did he break your heart?">The Lord of Death rises.LD: "Leave. You are not longer welcome here. Go, before I kill you."Oh... I think I said something wrong.
>>31310509Mario Cart. One race to rule them all.The winner is officially the better hero/villain.
>>31310519Fine! The undefeated winner of Mario Kart makes her exit.
>>31310519So that confirm, Lord of Death is a girl.
>>31310519WAIT WAIT WAITIf you can't settle your differences through fighting, why not have a battle on the ultimate stage?Mario party 3!
>>31310519Nobody told you to say that.
>>31310519...you're a girl, aren't you?LADY OF DEATH?
>>31310544>gay people don't exist
>>31310519>before I kill you."If I leave without getting you AND Threepunch man's aid, I'm very probably dead anyway, and this way is likely to hurt less.Bring it."
>>31310519I think leaving might be a good idea.
>>31310519jesus Christ rena why would you ask thatwowliterally just let him kill you
>>31310519Your a girl?
>>31310519But we haven't played Rainbow Road yet!
>>31310583>>31310565He could also be a straight man that loved the same girl as threepunch man and lost.
>>31310583>>31310544Fucking /u/boaters pls stop
>>31310519Take your leave. It will give LoD some time to cool down, at the very least.
>>31310519"I can't leave now. This is too important."
>>31310572Can't argue with this logic.
>>31310519Rena, giiiiiiiirl, have some subtlety! Quick, make some amends. Try appealing to his vanity.
>>31310614The fuck? Thinking that a character might be a girl is /u/ now?Go fuck yourself, dude.
>>31310611Or perhaps one of his family members was killed in an incident that involved the Three-punch Man.
>>31310519Leave, but on your way out say something like "I'll be back after you cool down. Want me to pick you something up?"
>>31310611>>31310662Sounds better than ex-lovers to me, no matter the gender
>>31310519"I bet you'll feel better if you talk about it."
>>31310519Not even on the cheek? No wonder your dead went poorly.
>>31310614...Wait, what?How does that even make a lick of sense.If the Lord of Death IS a LADY of death, and the Threepunch MAN broke her heart...where is the /u/?
>>31310519Show him a picture of kitty to calm him down
>>31310519>Asking someone about their genderYou can't just do that, stupid!You have to be subtle. Hand them a game of Pokemon, see that character they make.
>>31310614How is that related to /U/ Boats? I was wondering if this is some lovers spat between lord death and threepunchman, I'm assuming lord death is a girl
>>31310682>>How does that even make a lick of sense.It don't, the guy if fucking retarded.
>>31310519"No. We must stop her, and we can't do it without your help. I won't leave until I've convinced you."
>>31310654>>31310682>>3310706fair enough, my bad, Jumped the gun. I appologize for being a fucktard
>>31310680Haha 'date' not 'dead'. You probably aren't going to die, Rena! Don't worry about it. But just in case you do... how'd that thing with Spine Ravager go? You know. For the chronicles of history and stuff.
>>31310519Apologize. Apologize a lot. We don't know how that stuff works. It's not easy as cleaning, or driving, or playing video games, you know?If he wants to talk about it, he could give us a call or something. Maybe a talk over some coffee or pizza after he's calmed down.We could've really used his help, though. He seems like a nice, if scary, guy.
>>31310716He really is a nice guy. Just a bit scary. We're going to dinner tomorrow. But I gotta see if I live long enough for that."If I leave without getting you AND Threepunch-man's aid, I'm very probably dead anyway. This way is likely to hurt less, too. So please. I'm sorry if I offended you but... We really do need your help. I won't leave until I've convinced you."LD: "Do not say I didn't give you a chance...">Lord of Death's cloak opens slightly and four blades appear.LD: "Any last words, Hero?"
>>31310706Lord is a male title though
>>31310734"...that looks an awful lot like the power that the Golem had."
>>31310734We've seen those blades before...
>>31310734One of Evil-Rena's creations displayed that exact power.That means that she HAS defeated you in her iteration of the universe.
>>31310734"Oh, so that's where she got that power. I was kinda curious about that."
>>31310734I RECOGNIZE THOSE BLADES
>>31310734"Hey, that girl was using a blade ability just like that.Does that mean she killed you in that universe?"
>>31310734I've got three."Gate.Of.Pebbleon."
>>31310734>Yes.>Try to think of some good last words
>>31310734"OH FUCK, THE CAT'S GONNA GET YOU!"
>>31310734Not to annoy you, but the golem NegaRena sent here had those scythes, so she defeated your other self.
>>31310734Alternate Rena stole your powers.She probably killed you, Threepunchman, and everyone else in her timeline.
>>31310734"How about a chance to avenge your alternate world self? The golem she sent into this world used those same blades."
>>31310734Oh, we already nearly died from those before. Did you know that she likes to use those to steal powers?
>>31310734"I've seen that power before. evil rena gave it to one of her servants."
>>31310734Oh wow, alternateRENA did actually kill you.
>>31310734"Oh, the scythes. Yeah, I got stabbed by those before. The golem had them."
>>31310774Bear in mind, Rena. You don't have to win, and you don't have to kill him.You just have to stay alive long enough that he gets irritated and admits that an alternate version of you could be a credible threat.
>>31310734Huh.Alternate me killed you and used your powers to fuel her golem. Guess you ain't the strongest after all.Neat.
>>31310734Just say I said something witty.Also I recognise those blades. Have you had an encounter with very evil cat-like person recently?
>>31310734"Wanna be my arch?"
>>31310734> LD: "Any last words, Hero?"ROCKS FALL, YOU DIE.
>>31310818>Have you had an encounter with very evil cat-like person recently?evidently not, or he wouldn't still have the blades.
>>31310734Um, alternate universe me definitely had that power. That means she stole it from alternate universe you. Don't you want to avenge alternate universe you?
>>31310734Tactically, I think we have an advantage here. We've already seen how those blades move, and we've gotten much more agile since then, plus we have a suit that enhances our speed. We should be able to avoid his attacks.
>>31310846Bridgette is old and busted
>>31310810and you have an advantage. You've seen that power before.I'm betting that this is one of those "one and done attacks". Most people who see it don't get the chance to see it again.
>>31310866Bitch nigga I will fight you.
>>31310734Better prepare to dodge just in case, Rena.
>>31310835When we dispatched cat-golem, the stolen powers returned.Chances are cat-golem gibbed LoD first (right after entering our timeline) so that's why it had this power.
"I've seen those scythes before... I was stabbed by them, actually. Alternate me already killed you and took your weapon."LD: "What?""Yeah. She gave them to her golem and he stole people's powers with them. Those are the exact weapons."LD: "... I was killed? How... How is this possible?""Cause you probably went in alone. If you work with us we can avoid that, you know?"LD: "...""You can avenge alternate you."LD: "... I will assist you. But if I find out this is a trick...">One of the blades hovers close to her.LD: "And I refuse to work with you if Threepunch-Man is there.">Rena is about to ask why again but stops herself.I guess I should be happy I got the more difficult one to cooperate? But without both of them working together this might not work...
>>31310846You can have more than 1 arch. Cynthia is our arch too as is that magician dude.
>>31310899Time to yell at Threepunch-Man for making LD sad!
>>31310899Let's just get the story from 3PM.
>>31310866say what again
>>31310899This is easily solved if you can get the story from Three-punch man. Then get them to apologize.
>>31310899Easy, you just need to make Threepunch-Man to disguise himself so LoD don't recognize him.
>>31310899Make 3 punch man apologize
>>31310904>You can have more than 1 arch.
>>31310899Exchange friend codes.
>>31310899Ok, let's go get Threepunch man to work with us. We can think later how to get those two working together.
>>31310930Agreed. Especially since Three-Punch Man is less likely to kill us if we ask about the bad blood between him and Lord of Death.
>>31310899Have Threepunch man change his alias to three hit manezalso ask why LD hates him
>>31310899"What if I can get Threepunch-Man to apologize for… whatever he did?"
>>31310899"This would be a perfect chance to prove that you can do something he can't."
>>31310899"Okay okay, no Threepunch-Man. He's probably not even that strong anyway, right? I've never heard of him doing much, maybe he always spends his time out of the city because he's weak and afraid of fighting villains. I wouldn't want to do the arches teaming up thing with him either."
>>31310981>>31310987We can ask 3PM instead, let's not bother LD any longer.
>>31310904No. We're "their" arch.I know Bridgette is a mutal arch. I can't remember if we added Queen or Cynthia. But I think those are the last two we'd even have considered adding.>>31310947We also need to get Lord of Death to disguise himself, so Threepunch man doesn't recognise him.And officially so that "evil rena" doesn't know what power set she's dealing with.Lord of Death is now "Lord Of Cake".
>>31310987Now is not the time or place to press that issue. We can consider that angle after we get more info, but right now all we'll do is anger the Lord of Death.
>>31311021Oh my, it's not angelic!
>>31311021This is the best plan.Lord of CakeandThree Kick Girl
>>31310899Let's just get to Three Punch Man before you die.
>>31311021Nah, we only got Bridgette to be our arch.Cynthia's arching with Sparkle, as is EdgeMurder.Queen probably forgot about it.
>>31310899This may be a good time for >>31310441
>>31310899What if we get him to apologize?
>>31311047I thought it was important that I be not_Angelic for the post I was originally typing about how Bridgette was best girl and not Queen. Then I got distracted with the "cake or death" gag.Anyway, back to anon.
>>31310899Before you leave, ask him if he'd like to play video games again sometime.
Eh.... I don't wanna ask why not again. I think I'm pushing my rather pitiful luck as is..."What if I get him to apologize?"LD: "... I will consider it. Now go.">He begins pushing Rena towards the door. She walks off and eventually reaches the entrance to the cave.>Raindrops and Queen of the World stand there. Raindrops looks so relieved to see the hero.>Queen of the World holds out her hand.QotW: "Hissy.""Eh? Oh, right.."Wait...Where did that thing go? I know I had it...QotW: "Peasant Rena. Give me my hissy back, now. The rules of borrowing state you must return the item after you are done borrowing it."
>>31311187how do we not still have hissy
>>31311187Tell her you'll be right back, Go back and get HISSY.
>>31311187Go back in, ask him if he's seen the Queen's staff.
>>31311187Go back inside to look for Hissy.Accidently stumble on Lord Death crying without her mask.
>>31311085I have a (possibly) faulty memory of possibly adding Cynthia for some reason. and possibly Queen, though yeah, the only stable arch we have is Bridgette.Because she is best gril.>>31311204need both hands to play Mario Kart properly. Must have put the snakestaff down.
>>31311187uh ohretrace your stepshope that LD isn't afraid of snakesor that he's REALLY afraid of snakes
>>31311187Sneak in so Death won't notice us, then quitely retrieve Hissy. He'd probably kill us if he sees us so soon again.
>>31311187Well...get back in there and find it.
I wonder where that adventurous snake went off to.
>>31311187cry because you don't know what happened to hissy and you know it's important to her and you must have dropped it when negotiating with lord death and he's agreed to help but hissy isn't here anymore and we're so sorry
>>31311187>Go back inInterrupt lewd scene between HissyXLordofDeath
>>31311187We are gonna walk in on LD getting shanked. Or BIG FACE REVEAL
>>31311187Rena, check inside your pants.
>>31311187Go back in with the Queenie.Watch as LoD falls hopelessly for her.
>>31311274>NTRing RDNo. Die.
>>31311187Try to remain calm. Panic.Hissy is like Kitty is to you, to QotW. You just lost her kitty! You monster!
>>31311225We'll find her staring at a picture of three-punch man.
>>31311335It's fine, we'll keep our eyes shut
>>31311325Oh my god! I'm horrible!>Rena runs back inside only to find that the entrance to the Lord of Death's chamber is closed off. There is a sign there that says 'Do Not Disturb'>Rena peeks outside and sees Queen of the World.>She does not look happy.Oh god... I think either path will lead to my death...
>>31311369Compliment her side-ponytail. DISTRACTION.
>>31311369Queen outranks Lord.Sorry, Lord of Cake.Knock on the door, and then go in.
>>31311369Go in, you lost the equivalent of Kitty to QotW, remember how you felt when Cynthia kidnapped Kitty? That's what she's felling right now and that's your fault.
>>31311369Apologize. Apologize a lot. Apologize by crying.Knock on his door, go in, and ask him if he has seen a staff around here before someone else kills us.
>>31311369knockfor the love of god knock
>>31311369Loiter outside the door until Lord of Death opens it on his own.
Man, fate is just intent on letting this iteration of QoTW not like Rena at all.
>>31311369Think carefully. Did you toss the staff aside at any point? That's what triggers it to summon the snake. We might be able to lure Hissy out of there without going in there ourselves.
>>31311369At least with QOTW, you death will be cuter. LOD will probably be quicker though.Whichever you think is more important.
>>31311369Sneak in. That way we don't disturb LoD (he's not disturbed if he doesn't notice us) and we also get Hissy back. Everybody wins!
>>31311369Okay so what if we definitely totally made friends with Threepunch-man and then got him to say sorry to The Lord of Death and THEN found Hissy while they were totally being friends with eachother.That's... that's a good plan. Right?
>>31311457Oh my god... I think it's when we sat down to play Mario Kart. My love for video games has come back to haunt me...>Rena knocks on the door.LD: "One momen!">The Lord of Death opens the door and glares at Rena.LD: "You again...""Hey, sorry to bother you... Did I leave a golden snake staff here?"LD: "No. Now leave me alone."
>>31311513LD got cute
>>31311369Oh shit, did you leave ALL your stuff in there? He's got your DS!
>>31311513Okay goodbye sorry for bothering.
>>31311513Give him puppy dog eyes.USE THE POWER OF FRIENDSHIP RENA!
>>31311513"OK, let me rephrase that.I definately DID leave a golden snake staff. Which may now potentially be a snake.And you can't scare me off with death because I will get murdered if I go back without it."
>>31311513Call past her for Hissy to come back!
>>31311513You mind if I come in and check?It belonged to my friend, and she's pretty upset over it. It was her pet, in a way.While you're here, let me introduce you to everyone.
>>31311513"What about a snake? Hissy, are you in there?"
>>31311549MOTHERFUCKER.And our pizza!
>>31311549Despicable! What a villain!
>>31311513"Uh... Queen's going to be really pissed with me if don't get her snake staff back to her."
"What about a snake? I mean... I'm pretty sure I left the staff in there and it might have turned into a snake..."LD: "It turns into a snake..?""Yeah. Hissy, are you in there!">Her shout echoes through the halls. For a moment it seems like nothing will happen.>Then a snake pops up from Lord of Death's cloak. It's tongue flicks through the air while Lord of Death stares at it.
>>31311549the Pizza and DS were gifts anyway.But the snakestaff was a loaner to us.
>>31311670Hissy has a heart for her head.That's adorable.
>>31311670It kinda look like a dick.
>>31311696GRAB IT QUICK
>>31311696yuuuuup that's hissy!sorry about that>grab the snake>quickly
>>31311670grab hissy real quick.That should turn him back into a staff, right?
>>31311696"If you let him go, I'll clean your house!"We've got our talents, so let's use them.
>>31311696Take the blow for Hissy.
>>31311696Stop that I'll clean your house don't kill the snake or else I'm deas
>>31311696"Nnnnoooooo if you do that Queenie will be sad. And angry. Mostly angry."Grab Hissy quickly.
>>31311696NOOOOOOO! SAVE HISSY!Quickly.
>>31311734git-stabbed in defence of Hissy.
>>31311696a-are you okay?
>>31311696Grab it with your super speed then RUN RENA! RUN FOR YOUR LIFE
>>31311696Grab Hissy. It's probable death vs. certain death.
Rolled 17>>31311696REFLEX CHECK
>>31311696MUST PROTECT HISSY.
Rolled 2Rolling to save Hissy.
Rolled 2>>31311789good point
Rolled 11>>31311696Use your super speed!
Rolled 13>>31311696Rolling with all of my hate of /u/.Based dice god dislikes /u/, right?
>>31311789>>31311823So, basically we very quickly fail to save hissy?
>>31311823This is how it's fucking done.
Tell him the secret about throwing banana peels forward and shells backwards if you press the directional stick forward and backward respectfully in exchange for the snake.That's still a thing right? I remember doing that on the first mario cart.
>>31311852no, you are not a dice god.Dice god is ambivalent towards fictional lesbians.>>31311830>>31311851REALLY seems to hate snakes though.
Rolled 3Rolling to save the snake staff.
>>31311696Tell him he can keep the DS if you can have the snake.
Rolled 13>>31311696HISSY NO
guys, you remember it's "roll under" day, right?
>>31311880>>31311823>>31311830noooooooooooooooooooooooThis is intolerable
Rolled 17>>31311908Don't worry. I got this.
>>31311696Jesus, LD, why are you such a meanie.
Rolled 3>>31311950their ex-boyfriend is an assholerolling to perceive
>>31311950Because, uh, he's a villain?
Ok, Larro.You can have the hand of your choice in exchange for the snake.This is no small trade.
Rolled 18>>31311696[placate] Promise to come back and play more mario cart. And bring snacks.
>>31311696Try to grab Hissy, in the process unlatching LD's cloak and revealing he's a very flat girl.
>>31311789>Rena reaches out and snatches Hissy from Lord of Death.>She can feel the snack pull and tug against fabric. With a slight tearing and popping sound the Lord of Death's cloak comes off and falls to the ground. Just as Lord of Death's blades strike Hissy, the snake turns into a golden staff. The blades bounce off harmlessly.>The Lord of Death's cloak falls to the ground. Rena stares at the villain.LD: "... Do not say anything."
>>31312014Are you sweating through your mask?
>>31312014There aren't enough gay characters on /tg/.
>>31312014More like LADY Death, am I right?
>>31312014Nod.Then GTFO of there!
>>31312014"Why would I?"
Rolled 13>>31312014"You and TPM used to date, didn't you. He was a bit of a dense loser?"RENA MEET YOUR FATHER AND MOTHER
>>31312014It's okay, we won't tell anyone how cute you are if you don't want us to.
>>31312014Sure okay yeah of course no problem totally as many different ways you know to say yes while running away.
>>31312014Hissy! Thank God you're safe!...don't say anything about what?
>>31312037Lord Death could be a trans man
>>31312014I'm confused, is this supposed to be embarrassing or surprising?Just go "About what?"
>>31312014"We saw nothing! Nothing at all!!"Tak Hissy and run away
>>31312014Say nothing.But three punch man totally broke her heart.
>>31312014Just shrug. We really don't care if he's a cross dresser.
>>31312014"I didn't see anything"Time to book it.
>>31312014just nod and walk away slowlydon't do anything retarded Rena, even though thats your natural instinct, fight it so we live to see another day.
>>31312014...Uhhhh.Check over our shoulder to make sure that flying camera isn't around.It is, isn't it?If not, "Say anything about what? I'll come back latter if I can get TPM to apologize ok?"
>>31312014Do. Not. Say. Anything.
>>31312014"Don't worry, people think I'm a boy all the time."
>>31312014> "... Do not say anything."Right. Just nod, zip up your lips and walk away.
>>31312014"If it turns out you're my mom I swear I'm going to join my evil twin and burn this reality to ash."
>>31312014>>Rena reaches out and snatches Hissy from Lord of Death.>>She can feel the snack pull and tug against fabric.Rena, you're hungry.
>>31312014silently give her a thumbs upwalk away but wink at her first
>>31312165Oh god.I hope that Lord Death and 3 punch man aren't Rena's parents.
>>31312014"It's okay, I wont tell anyone you're afraid of snakes."
>>31312194I thought her parents are dead
>>31312194Would make a ton of sense. Our rocks are actually 3 shot rocks of death. We've never had to use more than 1-2 rocks though
>>31312165Nah, Rena's mother is apparently a normal human.Or Raindrops.Who her dad is, or where he is, no idea.
>>31312263And that fucked the golem right the fuck up didn't it?
>Rena simply nods and walks away. She can hear the door slam shut behind her as she exits the cave. Once outside she hands Queen of the World her staff.>The Queen smiles and holds her staff close.QotW: "Peasant Rena, I knew you would return Hissy. I would have been furious if she had been...">The Queen of the World looks at Hissy. There's a scratch on the otherwise immaculate staff.>She glares at Rena.......
>>31312271Obviously LD is her dad, then.
>>31312294I'm sure she can just get that buffed out.
>>31312294Oh shit. Angry Queenie.
>>31312294Fuck it, just let her kill us. Or submit to being her servant for a while.
>>31312294QotW is waaaaay too cute, it's killing me.
>>31312294...that was inevitable wasn't it.
>>31312294sighbend overdrop pants
Have you guys ever considered that maybe Rena knows her parents and we just haven't seen them yet?
So for the next chapter we're going to tell at 3PM until he cries, right
Rolled 11>>31312294Wait. She can just have it transform into a snake and then back, right?
>>31312294um.. uh...Oh! Tell her the staff is now deathproof! It only adds to QOTW's GLORY!
>>31312282that was Rocks fall you die.Rena only ever used Pebbleon once, and that was in the April Fools crossover.It remains to be seen if she actually can do it.
So ends another chapter. Thanks for reading, everyone! This went in directions I didn't anticipate. Here's an unused panel as a bonus. And as usual I'll post the start time for the next thread on the twitter.
>>31312316bad, but better than "my smile is gone for good" queenie if real harm had come to Hissy.
>>31312335She knows her mom. We've got nothing on her dad, yet. She never mentioned him.What we know about our mom is:> Told Rena to be nice to everybody.> Apparently invented the Sad Box.> Rena and her haven't been in touch lately.And I think that's it.
>>31312377Fucking. Adorable.delicious brown girls
>>31312377Oh my god that is something that will have to happen in the future.
>>31312377What did you anticipate?
>>31312377Thanks for running man, great thread as always.How strong was Sparkle's Rena-fucked-up-sense tingling during the fiasco with LD?
>>31312377EM is 2cute without a hat.>>31312391Rena should call her mom, then. You don't go off on parallel universe suicide missions without calling your loved ones first.
>>31312377Goddammit. I knew she should have kept the Warmaster hat on and listened to triple-setting-crossing Slaanesh.
>>31312377What did you not anticipate?
>>31312412Caffornicator not getting any I bet.
Wait, does that panel show that Edgemurder's power is related to hat magic? She turned into her magical girl self with her tophat and the unused panel had her turning into a warmaster.
Futa Queenie x reverse-trap Raindrops when
>>31312412I had planned on EdgeMurder going full Edge again. But it didn't happen and I think it's better like this anyway.>>31312427She's learned to tune it out now. It's pretty much been going off non-stop the past few weeks.>>31307983"Haha. From a creamer cup. Where else?"
>>31312419As the guy who did the original edit, I'm both honored and irritated that someone copied mecongrats /tg/ we now have two dongwarriors
>>31312531>"Haha. From a creamer cup. Where else?"You should try milking yourself. I'm curious as to what would happen.
>>31312531How Edgy is Edgemurder/Olivia in bed?
>>31312531>"Haha. From a creamer cup. Where else?"And what about the sugar?
>>31312531Is it just me or are your breasts growing and shrinking constantly?
>>31312563I'm betting that Olivia is as vanilla as all get out.Edgemurder is a freak.No, wait. The other way around is funnier.
>>31312572She only needs to stick her finger in it.Caffo is just that sweet.
>>31312531If we had somehow managed to convince Rena to offer Lord of Death her hat, would that have helped out the negotiations?
>>31312563You can't be edgy in bed. Unless she's a full on 'worship your dark master'-type domme, I guess.
>>31312560More coffee.You realise how terrible that must be if she, for example, got sick and doctor wanted to take a blood samole?
>>31312531So it's only your saliva that's different?
>>31312621Yeah, like she said before.Though I wonder how she manages to catch any shuteye if all she can taste is black coffee.CF probably hasn't slept in years.
>>31312531>She's learned to tune it out now. It's pretty much been going off non-stop the past few weeks.Also she knows that right now it's Raindrops problem.
>>31312608Rena wearing the hat probably helped. It has Slaanesh inside it after all. It gives a fucking massive charm bonus.
>>31312605And here I was thinking Caffo asks Sparkle for that.
>>31312645Or she drools on her pillow as she sleeps.
>>31312531Now here's the real question:If she had gone full Edgemurder again, would there be a chance of Sparkle's family being harmed? And how soon would her death follow such a theoretical event?
>>31312645She doesn't sleep.She has something called the Caffeine Fugue.
>>31312686Since she doesn't have any Magical Girl powers she's no match for Sparkle, and certainly not Ben.
>>31312531I'm glad she didn't go full Edge again. She's much cuter this way.
>>31312726Who said anything about Sparkle or Ben?
>>31312560"Hahaha. That just makes more coffee. Expreso, hahaha. ">>31312563"Hehe. I don't kiss and tell. Nah, but seriously we just had coffee. Girl was obviously confused. Didn't wanna do anything til she's all better, hehe.">>31312598"Eyes are up here, hehe.">>31312645>CF probably hasn't slept in years."Ha ha ha.....">>31312686Death would have been swift and painful. I had planned on her either being brutally murdered or finally making amends with Sparkle. One of the two.
>>31312774>In everything but sex, Caffie is morally loose>In sex, Caffie is a saintwhat
>>31312774>CF probably hasn't slept in years.>"Ha ha ha....."Ohh, dry spell worse than we thought?
>>31312798>Caffie>ever having sex
>>31312774Poor Caffornicator. One day you'll get laid, then you'll pass out for a day or so, and it will be amazing. Just hold out, yo?
>>31312774I do not have a reaction image for this moment.I hope you find happiness some day caffi
>>31312830Just needs to keep working on MM+, I think there is a spark there.
>>31312774Where did Caffo get the Edge hat? Didn't Sparkle destroy it?
>>31312774oh god, that anon was right about you not sleeping in yearsthat is true helljesus christI am so sorry
>>31312774I love expreso
>>31312774>"Hahaha. That just makes more coffee. Expreso, hahaha. "No wonder no girl wants to fuck her if she lactates espresso
>>31312870I bet she just didn't think it was a good idea to give it back to Rena.
>>31312866you mean MM++benben caused namechanges for the monster family
>>31312870Rena bought everyone hats during her party. Caffornicator's just happened to be a copy of EdgeMurder's.
>>31312866When did she start working in Bridgette?
>>31312774CFthis is important.you need to take a nap.
>>31312908Caffi, y u so cute
>>31312908Wait, so edgemurder didn't even need her actual hat to go full edgy? She had the power in herself the whole time?
>>31312908That proves it. Edgemurder's power is based on hats!
>>31312894Or the Heroes just leave powerful artifacts laying around with no supervision.>>31312908>there're more of those thingsSo someone's making EdgeMurder foci? Or was the power to be edgy always within her?
>>31312942so long as she has a lid
>>31312942Seems like her power and attitude is determined by the hat she wears, if the comissar picture was anything to go by.
>>31312870I think Edge has some kind of power to mantle herself with powers based on objects. Or hats. Or something.Kind of makes sense considering her mother is Pringle Guard. Maybe?
>>31312917Caffeine Fugue, I told you.It's like the opposite of sleep, but functionally equivalent for Caff's biology.
>>31312971Even more reason to get her and Jade to go and buy cute hats.
>>31312880"Hehe">>31312917"Hahaha... I got my powers when I was, like, 19. I'm 28 now. Hahaha...">>31312942So long as Edgemurder has a hat (top) she gains new powers and a new persona to go with it. If that hat (top) is removed (popped) she loses her powers.
>>31313014We need to get tons of hats to put on her. This will be fun.Rena-hair wig pls
>>31313014Holy crapEdgeMurder isn't her true identityShe's Hat-chan
>>31313014What if you put a pink top hat with a butterfly pin on her head?
>>31313014I am so, so sorry you had to live your life like that.
>>31313014So... She can't be stopped unless she's popped?That sounds lewd.
We need to give Caffornicator some anti-coffee.
>>31313014What if she gets an unfortunate haircut that leaves her bald?
>>31313014CF, please.Take a sleeping pill.
>>31313014>pop the topGoddamnit.GODDAMNITI am simultaneously enraged beyond reason by this revelation and laughing out loud at the hilarity.
>>31313080A bigass hug from Rena.Wait. Rena collects hats. Olivia gets her powers based on hats.They're the perfect team!
>>31313051That is my first thought too. If you pay for tier 3 on Kickstarter for $19.99, you too can be placed in the story with your very own mini-story arc and single choice power!
>>31313120Hugs don't cause sleeping. Maybe Rena can cuddle her?
>>31313014>"Hehe"I'm being completely serious here. I would milk you.
>>31313120Well, except for the fact she gets a different personality with every hat.
>>31313086I doubt she hasn't tried that.
>>31313014have you tried SCIENCE to let you sleep?
>>31313014So she's pringle guards daughter?
>>31312598They swell with coffee periodically.
Rolled 14>>31313014Caffornicator, you've been dealt a hard hand in life.You cannot sleep and everything you can create seems to be coffee related, to the point you fear you might be more coffee than human.But I can see your lonely heart and it is almost certainly human.Take a deep breath and take things as slow as you can. Rena's your friend, so know you won't be alone anymore. She's a bit inexperienced and naive, but she's got a good heart.So, take a step down and stop rushing into relationship and try making friendships. Bonds of people is the true power.
>>31313177anesthesia might actually work
>>31313190I'm kind of disappointed you didn't roll a twenty.
>>31313014Does her power relate only to hats or does ir work with head accessories, like a wealder's mask or a doctor's mirror?
Rolled 6>>31313230It isn't about the roll, anon. Its about the message and feelings that are trying to be conveyed.
>>31313014try getting edgemurder a nice hat to give her a nice personalityalso coffee can't possibly be that strong, try lying down sometime
>>31313014Does her outfit change based on the hat as well?Because now you can draw her in thousands of outfits.
>>31313270>It isn't about the roll>6The dicegods disagree
>>31313190>>31313270Aaaand they add up.Message and feelings conveyed successfully, I suppose.
Rolled 15>>31313230It's because he's wrong.Caffornicator can't stop rushing.It's part of who she is, and she needs someone who understands that she's a speedy person.Incidently, I can't help but speculate on whether or not Cynthia has been sleeping lately, given how much nibbling she's been doing on Caff.
>>31313304> Cynthia becomes addicted to Caffo> "I just can't quit you!"
>>31313056Fun fact: Gamble is the last name of one of Pringle's founders and Olivia is the first name of the wife of the other founder.>>31313287Yes.
>>31313304So she's gotta go fast?
>>31313344never stop larropls
Somebody rearchive this thread, we're on page 10.
>>31313332Larro. Larro.Need image of Cynthia with coffee jitters.
>>31313344Why do you have to make it so hard to pick a favourite character?
>>31313344We must try new hats! maybe we find one where she can be a hero!Also we should give her murderface's hat
>>31313344What about an ushanka?
Rolled 14>>31313344That's adorable.I hope she can find her own way now and not succumb to being dark and edgy.Oh, god, what would have the Slanaesh Warmaster hat done to her poor mind? LEWDness I suppose.
>>31313377IT IS DONE.
>>31313405Caffeine is a very addicting drug.
>>31313513hahahaha, love it
>>31313513...poor, poor, Cynthia.
>>31313513>that Cafornicator face
>>31313513Is that a bed?Also did MM gained another +Also poor cynthia, this was probably her original plan.
>>31313568It's a match made in heaven.
>>31313513...Oh god yes.
>>31313513>that smug CaffoLove it.
>>31307709That was the best pic in this thread,
>>31313014Does CF ever actually drink coffee?
>>31313513soon, she'll NEED you, caffo!
>>31313827Why should she? Her very saliva is coffee.And she hasn't slept in 9 years. Fuck.
>>31313827She swallows her spit, yes.
Rolled 14>>31313513Using drugs to get people to do what you want isn't a very heroic thing to do, Caffornicator
>>31313858Hey, it's not Caffo's fault that Cynthia gets bitey. That's all her.
>>31313858it's more cynthia stole some drugs from caffornitaor. not her fault her blood is delicious.
>>31313858caffo didn't force MM++ to bite her and suck her bloodthat was entirely voluntaryMM++ clearly wants it
Can you grind up her poop and use it to make coffee? This is important
>>31313858She's not a very heroic person. Her idea of "seduction" includes cornering someone in a locked room. It's anyone's guess what she actually considers taboo.
>>31313961Makes the best Kopi Luwak
Seriously knowing if accessories work on her is sorta important.
>>31313985Kissing and telling
>>31314003Only one way to find out.
>>31314061That's only if the collected unconscious that is this player base tries it.
>CF has a baby>breastfeeds it>baby dies of caffeine overdose
>>31314084How do you know she can't make uncaffinated coffee?
>>31314084if she has a baby I imagine it would inherit something from her
the umbilical cord transfer blood between mom and baby. caffe has coffee blood.
>>31314132>baby never sleeps>never stops cryingPoor Caffo.
>>31314154Baby also never stops peeing because caffeine.
>>31314154that actually sounds like the normal baby experience
>>31310846She is happy here you fucking idiot. Her mom just sewed a + on her costume and she is showing it off. Fuck, don't just mislabel images to make shitty memespam image reactions out of them
>>31314305Not that anon but I just noticed the + on her uniform
>>31313344We need Hawaiian Olivia, stat.
>>31313513now get together you two