Your body cracks, pops, and shifts as you use the stolen image to your liking. Where before there was a 20something, plus thirty or so years dead woman now stands a seventeen year old boy. You have no context for the voice, but it should probably be fine. Just claim you have a cold. Colds are things people get.

You exit the room and walk downstairs. The smell of eggs and bacon and other food items wafting delicately to your heightened senses. You sit at the table and get your food. “Now Peter, did you wash your hands?” Asks an older woman who may actually be younger than you since, you know, you are a ghost and all. Wait. That’s Aunt May, innit?

“Aunt May?” You ask stabbing into your food with a fork.

“Oh my peter. You sound just awful! I thought you looked a little under the weather yesterday but are you feeling okay?” The aunt asks.

Yeah, you know Aunt May. Aunt to Peter Parker, aka spider-man. Wait, we are Peter Parker now. Which means she is our aunt! And we are Spiderman! You know, the Ramones song? Is he strong, listen bud. He’s got radioactive blood. “Can he swing from a thread? Take a look overhead. Look out! There goes the spider-man.” You mumble in agreement.

Aunt may puts a hand to your forehead, your spirit soul parts evidently dense enough to deal with any continuity errors. “Oh dear, you feel a bit off.” She says after taking her hand away. “Maybe you should rest for today.” She says in an auntish way.

“No, no. Let me get some food and orange juice in me and we will see how I feel then.” You mumble, trying to alter your voice till she stops looking at you strangely. “If it doesn’t clear up I’ll have a nice sit down.” You explain. What? Chick no! Look, you displaced Spider-Man through what I am going to assume breaking fate too much. You have a power and a responsibility. Do you want your uncle to have died for nothing?
(2/4?)

You take a nice long drink of orange juice as you lean back in your chair. “His uncle died, not mine.” You point out. No, you took his place. That makes his uncle yours now. That is how it works.

You agree that his uncle is now yours since you are not as up to date on uncle mechanics as you could be. You think on that as Uncle Ben makes a quick move for some coffee. “Hey there Pete. Love to have breakfast May but I am going to be late.” He explains rushing out the door.

“That is my dead uncle?” You ask watching him go. Yes. “He seems rather spry for a dead guy.” You note. Well, I mean, so do you. “Point.”

As you eat your Yank breakfast and curse the lack of proper tea a young girl walks over to the table still in pajamas. “That one is?” You ask looking up. No idea, she was not in my funny pages. One of the other sort probably knows her better.

The girl sits down and glances over to the news playing on the TV. More information about the Oscorp theft. A black Spider-Man was seen fighting crime downtown, further speculation about the appearance of superpowered individuals and armchair theorists discussing a “super powered arms race”. All in all the general bickering you would expect. The girl next to you glances around with her eyebrows furrowed in confusion before looking at you. You look back at her with your best “What do you want?” Face and she seems to think something over before shrugging, evidently not able to place it.

You take a sniff of the air and catch the distinct scent of future. Well, unfuture to be precise. It has a sort of hum which smells a lot like grapes. Green grapes from the ash filled wastes of California to be exact. California is just awful. “Say, are you okay?’ The young lady asks looking at you confused again.

“Peter isn’t feeling too well Stella. Could you go get a thermometer from the pantry? I want to make sure he isn’t getting a fever.” May says. Stella's her name, got it.
(3/3)

You keep adding idle chatter to the breakfast table, keeping an eye on the reactions of the aunt until you are reasonably certain it is close enough to peter’s real voice to keep people from asking question. Still sound like you drink tar recreationally though.

After assuring Aunt May that you are fine you follow the chemically acidic stench of peter to the basement. You take some scrounging but you manage to find his stuff and confirm that yes, you are spider-man now. You displaced him, it’s your job. “Why do I get stuck with the shit job then?” You ask.

Fair question, let me ask you this then. If you took peter’s place and he took yours, where do you think he is right about now? “Well, likely trapped before an onslaught of angels about to team up with the fallen angel of lust and sloth just before two or three apocalypses happen. Or eating potatoes. I am sure he will be fine.” You say unconvincingly.

Right. So what do you want to do?
[] Go spiderman the crap out of crime
[] Talk to the unfuture kid. Stella? See if she suspect something
[] Go shopping. It’s holiday and you can probably find some cash.
[] Other, please specify
(4/4)

Oh dear god what.

>>31209829
>[] Go spiderman the crap out of crime
...Weird day.

File: 1396404811886.gif-(1019 KB, 464x350, 1371808292070.gif)

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Something doesn't feel quite right...

So, where do I go to see Peter Parker?

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I am extremely confused.

>>31210045
>>31209998
Look at the date.

>>31210045
Looks like this is an "April fools, motherfucker" type deal.

>[X] Go spiderman the crap out of crime

I guess.

Is this your idea of an April Fools joke?

>>31209829
>[x] Go spiderman the crap out of crime

apparently we all missed an important conversation in the irc hugbox

>>31209829
>[] Talk to the unfuture kid. Stella? See if she suspect something
Well, I like it. It's weird, but I like it.

You know what, Cosgrove? I know you're watching this thread.

I'm just gonna wait until the ACTUAL new thread is up.

I know what day it is; I HAVE A CALENDAR TOO, DAMMIT.

>>31210073
>Is this your idea of an April Fools joke?
I gotta say that the whole "Haha I said I was running but it was really a crossover thing!" is kinda... annoying. Did the hugbox all get together and tell themselves this was a good idea and pair up for this shit?

>>31210073
All the QMs are switching. Larro ran MGNQ, Deculture is probably running Hero Quest.

Look forward to Cosgrove running HQR

>>31210105
I think they're switching, so if he puts one up it's going to be Azure's quest... Whatever that is.

>>31209829
Find Peter's future video game. Start a new game. Catch them all.

>>31210122
>Look forward to Cosgrove running HQR
God fucking damnit.

>>31210112
It's just a bit of fun, stop being a faggot about it.

“I agree voices in my head who I decide to listen to. Today is a weird day, and something is off. I mean, I barely have an unfinished costume as is, but the city needs spider-man. Should I go in the half finished costume and stick with just pants or use something else. I should warn you ahead of time that my pants carry a folded pocket dimension I keep stuff in. I call it inventory.” You explain with a small laugh

You look over the gear and gadgets available. “I also want to try web slinging because my blood is radioactive. How hard can it really be?” You ask.

[] Go in the scratchy old suit
[] Half-finished suit and clothes
[] Other, please specify

>>31210154
>[x] Other, please specify
Go naked

>>31210154
>[x] Go in the scratchy old suit

SPECTACULAR SPECTACULAR RISA THREAD!

>>31210154
Oh, right, we didn't finish the suit... why don't we do that real quick then head out. How hard could it be?

>>31210154
>[X] Go in the scratchy old suit

So I had a weird dream after the last quest considering the "venom" electro suit.
>Peter standing there after Green Goblin having forced him into a corner
>"Guess I have no choice but to play my trump card."
>Peter reaches to his wrist and pulls a cord, black ooze quickly engulfing him
>THREE STAR COSTUME... ULTIMATE VENOM REGALIA!
>And then Green Goblin screams that Peter has shit taste and Peter realizes it's Harry
Then I woke up. I have boring dreams.

You obviously need to complete the suit yourself.

Put your own spin on ot.

>>31210154
Scratchy old
Maybe try some science on the unfinished crap.

Spider-man lives science. You love science. He would be a proper mad science pupil were he here, so you should leave some mad science for him.

>>31210154
>[] Other, please specify
Use miracle ability to give spiderman a totally not broken costume.

>>31210199
We finished the suit all except for the mask.

We can still go out in the bulletproof suit and put on the old mask.

>>31210199
>>31210254
You make a strong argument. How hard could it really be? We are probably good at sewing and construction and other assorted skills.

Try and finish the suit?
Y/N

>>31210157
>implying a nigger could successfully break out of prison
who writes this shit? just letting three nameless guards die just to make a point that a nigger, of all people, loved his wife? or are they trying to make kingpin out to be worse than Kingrape the Jail Jigaboo?

>>31210273
Y

>>31210273
We made a fucking teslacoil out of the garbage in a Japanese classroom.

Pimp that spideysuit.

>>31210154
Azure, some days I love you.
But sleep is required, and I loath April Fools.

>>31210273
Y

>>31210295
wait, what?

>>31210273
Oh, right we're a different person aren't we? How good are we at costuming?

>>31210273
Y

>>31210295today's replacement is also tech-savvy.

>>31209743
Well lost a bet I could have sworn you would.have been in the hero quest universe

>>31210295
>>31210294
>>31210313

Please roll 1d100 to make a damn fine suit for Peter Parker.

>>31210318
"No idea, but we made a guitar that eats people out of a tooth, so how can this be harder?" You wonder.

Rolled 32

>>31210357

Rolled 61

>>31210357

Rolled 39

>>31210357

Rolled 6

>>31210357
kay

This...isn't going to be canon in the regular quest, right?

Rolled 82

>>31210315
It's exactly what it sounds like. Risa poisoned a teacher, stole her job, and replaced the lesson plan with "Disable this tesla coil I made out of trash. It will kill you all in a few minutes if you don't."

>>31210357
Are we about to make a spiderman suit god artifact thing to go with the tooth-guitar?

>>31210382
Canon for both

>>31210273
Y

>82

Superior spider suit making skills go.

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>>31210357
Make this costume.

>>31210416
>seemslegit.jpg

>>31210387
Assuming we're still best of five, we should be good.

>>31210387
That feel when you follow both quests... And I gotta say, poor Peter Parker.

>>31210357
It better include a fedora. I'm not done being noir yet

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>>31210416
oh jesus...
by the end of this thread cannon will be bum fucked by the rape train...

>>31210387
I don't even know what you're talking about.

>>31210491
I really hope we get to meet the Watcher.

Maybe even the Living Tribunal.

>>31210416
I'm...ambivalent. Whatever. Not like I have a real say and not my cup-of-tea but have fun. I'll read it all tomorrow.

>>31210491
>>31210525
>Getting rused by someone using a random trip

So where's Cosgrove running ronight?

>>31210548
Don't think he's running yet, but hopefully soon?

>>31210496
Remember back when Risa decided that she was going to be a teacher forever ago? Like right after she became an Arrancar? What happened is exactly what I said. She poisoned a teacher to create a job opening at a school, faked the credentials to get the job, and then built a tesla coil out of trash.

Wait; isn't Azure the one that was running that other bleach quest?
Are we a hollow?
Are we going to eat ghosts? Spider ghosts?

>>31210560
very soon

>>31210568
I have no idea what the fuck you're going on about; but I'm guessing it's obviously some sort of other quest.

>>31210609
You realize that this isn't actually PPQ you're in right now, right?

You look at the unfinished suit and sigh sadly. “If only lads these days had drive and initiative to finish what they start! Well, I am a responsible adult so it’s not like I can’t help a lad out.” You say. Actually he was possessed and had his body ravaged by a symbiote which-

“Wait!” You protest looking towards the basement door with a serious look. “I suddenly find myself unable to care.”

>82 not bad at all

Your arm splits like a horrible flower blooming and lashing tongues and twitching fingers shoot out. They grab the suit and start making modifications to the poor thing. Here and there gets ripped and replaced with thick X stitching which is imbued with unnatural power. You carve small sigils into the vest and they gain a level of lightness and strength from it. The mask is the worst part, but when you decide that you should make the kid cool you stitch the lenses in with those strange X patterned thick stitching and give the mouth a big scarecrow grin. You continue to patch up the suit like that, fixing parts which to the untrained eye may look finished but required a woman’s touch. A woman ghost cat fox abomination’s touch.

You nod satisfied at the outfit and store it in your inventory.
(1/2)

>>31210588
We're an obscenely powerful Hollow. I'd say we're in the lower end of Cosmic tier.

We might get our hands on a great old one if we take the time to look.

>>31210623
Cosgrove linked it on his twitter.

>>31210588
Closer to a Great Old One at this point. I'm half expecting this session to end with getting into a fight with the Norse pantheon

>>31210496
Risa is a Hollow. A ghost that stayed on earth until earthly want bored a hole into her heart and she became a masked soul eating ghost monster with super powers. She ate humans, ghosts, other hollows, and grim reapers until she felt the call to go among hundreds of other driven hollows to start eating each other and become a giant amalgam monster that she eventually emerged as the dominant persona of. Then she met up with some old hollow friends and took over the ghost wasteland of hollows after getting so strong she pulled off her mask and regained (HA!) her humanity. Deciding being king was boring, she stuck her buddy the Dakka Wolf named Jäger on the throne and fucked off to earth to check on a kid she poisoned with madness/spiritual power her first day as a hollow and became a teacher at his school.

Other stuff happened with a houseplant, the reapers, the eldritch abomination soul king, g-d, some angels, and the morning star. It's all in the pamphlet.

Point is, we ate The Soul King, now we are a great old/young one, and we have been loosed upon Another world because why not, let's have fun.

Did we mention she is batshit insane?

GAIN: SPIDER ABOMINATION SUIT Magical bonuses against all damage, though wearing it is tiring for most.

You take a step out of the basement intent on fighting crime when you nearly barrel over that Stella Girl. She has her hand raised as if she were about to knock on the door and you just stop yourself centimeters from her.

“Hey Peter. Are you feeling okay? You shouldn’t work too hard.” She explains probingly

Damn it, crime is afoot! I have no time for this!

[] “No! Just needed a good night’s rest is all. Just a bit, you know, tired from that yesterday stuff. Man was yesterday was sure yesterday, huh?” (Or other reassuring write in)
[] “Hold that thought, I have important teenaged boy things to do like skateboarding. And koalas.” (Escape excuse! Get out of there now and fight crime!)
[] Other, please specify
(2/2)

>>31210626
STYLE

>>31210647
It's not even Cosgrove running it right now. April fools, motherfucker.

>>31210670
>“No! Just needed a good night’s rest is all. Just a bit, you know, tired from that yesterday stuff. Man was yesterday was sure yesterday, huh?”

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>>31210670
Welp. Risa is absolutely fucked.

Stella is specifically programmed to protect Peter Parker. Not people who managed to take his form.

>>31210670
>[] “Hold that thought, I have important teenaged boy things to do like skateboarding. And koalas.” (Escape excuse! Get out of there now and fight crime!)
Sure, why not?

>>31210685
You mean the guy who's explicitly not Cosgrove isn't actually Cosgrove? Astounding.

>>31210670
>[] “No! Just needed a good night’s rest is all. Just a bit, you know, tired from that yesterday stuff. Man was yesterday was sure yesterday, huh?” (Or other reassuring write in)

I'll be okay, I've had my orange juice today!

>>31210670
>GAIN: SPIDER ABOMINATION SUIT Magical bonuses against all damage, though wearing it is tiring for most.
Fucking baller. We get to keep that, right?

>[x] “No! Just needed a good night’s rest is all. Just a bit, you know, tired from that yesterday stuff. Man was yesterday was sure yesterday, huh?” (Or other reassuring write in)

>>31210670
>[] “Hold that thought, I have important teenaged boy things to do like skateboarding. And koalas.” (Escape excuse! Get out of there now and fight crime!)

>>31210122
Yeah, already had Magical Rena Noir earlier today.
It was interesting. It already went past the bump limit and fell off.
https://archive.foolz.us/tg/thread/31202307

The whole nonsense today been rather pleasant.

>>31210706
>implying Stella isn't the one who would be fucked in this scenario.

>>31210722
Yeah, though it might have limited usefulness... Peter may need to make a(nother) new suit when he gets back.

>>31210706
I think Risa inherited the binding, otherwise Stella would already know, right?

>>31210747
The fuck are you talk abou-

Oh.

You thought I meant "Does Peter get to keep that?"

Nah dawg. Fuck Peter.

>>31210773

Bask in the Power of Fear...

We must strike FEAR into the hearts of the Kingpin's men.

"So play it off? We play it off? I am the best at playing things off. We got this."

>Writing now.

>>31210805
They thought the Black Spiderman was scary?

Just wait until Magical Abomination Spiderman hits the streets.

>>31210805
So there's going to be *another* Spider-Man that's going to do horrible things that Peter's going to have to pretend wasn't him...

At some point people are just going to stop trusting ALL spider-people.

>>31210816
This is going to be good.

>>31210840
I don't know, so far there's only one evil spider, three good ones, and now one chaotic neutral one.

I think with Risa at the reigns, we may be able to save Felicia this thread.

God save us all.

>>31210840
As long as we operate at night, it should be all good. Need to focus on tracking down Fisk's men and throwing a monkey wrench in their operations.

>>31210840
Around Arachnids, watch yourselves

Damn Pete's not gonna have access to his suit or equipment in Bleach(?) Universe. Lets help a brutha out and throw him a webshooter through some bullshit time magic portal or somethin

>>31210867
Or Doom is going to sense the great WRONGNESS and come to stop us.

>>31210876
Eh, disregard Spider-Man, eat Ghost Rider.

>>31210885
I wonder how he'll fare in that universe? He seems rather outclassed in comparison as he doesn't come from an over-the-top anime.

>>31210910
If Strange is half as powerful as he is in most of his comic universes; he's sensed us, and banishing us is childsplay for him.

>>31210862
So there's the Monster Spider-Man, Venom, Your Friendly Neighborhood Spider-Man, Scarlet Spider, and now the Nightmare Spider-Man...

How long until Manhattan is known as Spider-Island?

>>31210928
>>31210885
I don't thing that quest is even happening tonight if at all.

And if it is I'm going to be pretty salty since i have to be in bed early for work.

>>31210885
Remember, spidey is part magic. He is a totem of Anansi, the storyteller. He'll be fine and come away with a better understanding of the supernatural.

Also by the time he gets back, weeks of his own effort will have been undermined by Risa. Like how in Ult comics, Mysterious just tossed Fisk out a window. Except here, we're going to bite off Kletus's face and take the carnage spirit out of MJ to be our new murder biffle.

>>31210936
Strange in PPQ is a reality tv host who found a magic cape and is winging it right now.

>>31210964
Risa would do well to do some magic mumbo-jumbo to steal away Evil MJ's spirit so they could be friends in Bleach universe. May god have mercy on them.

>>31211006
>Implying Risa isn't just going to make it worse.

>>31210885
>>31210910
Peter is still a pretty high tier Super. He should be fine.

>>31210992
I feel like he's more savvy to things than you think, due to his ominous behavior during the Pym Christmas Special.

>>31210867
Or figure out carnage. No way she'll be able to fake sanity around us.

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>>31210964
There are more spider-gods than just Anansi.

>>31211006
I'm pretty sure separating souls from bodies is pretty much one of the most basic Hollow tricks.

Like Orihime had that happen to her at the hands of her ghost brother.

“Yes, of course! I was just tired. Had some OJ and now I am ready to go out into the town and do, you know, me things. Like eat junk food and listen to bad music.” You explain slowly slipping by her, patting her on the head. “So, don’t wait up. I am certainly not going to go and perform any acts of vigilantism.”

She touches her head where you patted her and seems confused. Like when you hear an air conditioner since forever, but once it kicks off the silence is the only thing you notice. She reaches for her coat as you make your way to the door and moves to follow you.

“Well, two can play at this game.” You think out loud as she is just behind you.

However she comes outside to an empty yard. The gentle sound of a bass cord being the only mention of your passing as you use your heightened powers to sonido which, oh not all of you know that. It’s like, super speed for a brief moment. You vanish and such. You land on a rooftop, away from prying eyes and start putting on the costume. “Man, that was close. She almost figured out I was spider-man.” You laugh a little. Actually she- Never mind.

You know people finding you are spider-man isn’t all bad. If a villain finds it and plans and is able to use it to harm peter’s loved ones he gets bonuses. “Think that counts for me?” You ask putting the abomination suit over you and feeling the gentle hum of your energy. What? “I mean, I am of the villainous persuasion and I am pretty sure I might harm his loved ones for any number of reasons.” You counter.
(1/2)

>>31210955
AzureEarth tweeted that there would be a thread "soonish" like 2 hours ago. Since Cosgrove announced this thread on twitter I'm not sure if Azure was referring to this quest or Hollow Quest Redux with Peter

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>>31210898
Risa is the superior Spider-man

No. It only counts when you are not spider-man. “Bollocks” You complain looking around the downtown area. You spend a while looking, finally ending up at the docks. There, on a shipping container, you see several pounds of cocaine.

“That’s a crime, right?” You ask pointing out the drugs. Yes Risa, drugs are a crime.

Looks like you might have the drop on them. Wait! We could web shoot them. Man, that would be so cool!
[] Web shoot them, have fun with it
[] Go all out, send a message to tyranny!
[] Other, please specify
(2/2)

>>31211038
>You know people finding you are spider-man isn’t all bad. If a villain finds it and plans and is able to use it to harm peter’s loved ones he gets bonuses.
Removing Parker Luck isn't a bonus... it's just a mercy.

>>31211057
>[x] Web shoot them, have fun with it

cocoon them! Threaten to lay eggs in them if you catch them dealing again!

>>31211057
Remember the three basic rules of being Spider-Man

Dodge
Quip
and Thwip.

>>31211057
>[] Web shoot them, have fun with it
And then steal ALL the drugs!

>>31211057
>[x] Web shoot them, have fun with it

While we are a murderous ghost, we still have to honor the Spiderman tradition and legend at least initially by acting the part until we get bored.

>>31211082

And wisecracks.

>>31211057
>[] Web shoot them, have fun with it

>>31211057
>[x] Other, please specify
Eat the cocaine. ALL THE COCAINE

>>31211092
That's what I meant by quip.

>>31211057
>[] Web shoot them, have fun with it
Wheee!

>>31211033
True, but I thought he was tied to Anansi because he's a lighthearted hunter of evil at the center of a web of stories, or did that change again?

>>31211057
>[X] Web shoot them, have fun with it

>>31211096
Snowflame pls.

>>31211057
[] Web shoot them, have fun with it
A little illusion couldn't hurt too though. Make them see and feel and buncha spiders on them. Pete would want us to keep up his theme right?

>>31211096
>[x] Other, please specify

Spread the love of cocaine to the people! Make it rain powder down in NYC!

Remember guys, we only have a thread to fuck things up as much as possible!

>>31211057
>webs, webs everywhere!

>>31211057
>[] Other, please specify
Do Cocaine.

>>31211105
I'm actually not entirely sure. I think there's more to it than Anansi, though I wouldn't be surprised if he was the primary behind it.

>>31211057
We might be playing Spiderman, but we still have broke-ass Risa powers.

POISON THE COCAINE! POISON IT WITH INSANITY POISON!

Alright, we are web shooting then. How hard can it be?

1d100 please. I will take minus 40 from the highest of the first five.

It is much harder than it looks

Rolled 76

>>31211197

Rolled 3

>>31211197

Rolled 15

>>31211197

Rolled 23

>>31211197

Rolled 35 - 40

>>31211197
Ha.

Rolled 1

>>31211197

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April Fools is a holiday so shitty even scat fetishests think it's too extreme.

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Rolled 6

>>31211197
>Literally how do I shot web

Like so.

Rolled 4

>>31211197
Thwip

Rolled 62

>>31211197

Hmm, maybe we should do some fancy martial arts stuff instead while attempting to look like we're doing spiderman moves.

>>31211197
Its a good thing Risa is really really good at reflexes.

>>31211218
That was almost too close.

>>31211242
Then it was not close enough

>writing now

Shoulda bought Skillful.
>15 SPXP:
>Skillful: Use your shape shifting intuitively to stretch your limbs, and other body parts and gives a bonus to combat.

That helps with sling web, right?

>>31210416
>Canon for both

>>31211154
Th-thanks Cosgrove...

>Not wanting to go down there and let them shoot / stab / whatever us while we laugh at them the entire time and make the underworld think that Spiderman is an immortal god.

oh hell! What the hell will monologue do to Peter?

>>31211318
Monologue is with us still.

>>31211308
...That's a good point.

>>31211308
We need to do this that way the usual questers can come back and expect Spider-Man to be an unkillable god.
Only to be proven wrong.

And then Peter can become a Shinigami Rider or whatever Marvel has.

Rolled 81

>>31211154

NO! With great Spiderman comes great responsibility!

I think we should only act villainous and cut loose after an identity crisis when enough superheroes (or the REAL Spiderman) confront us with evidence of us not being Spiderman.

>>31211295
Check the trips, son. It's a ruseman.

Can we bala them in the nuts? That's always fun.

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>>31210416

So... Where's Cosgrove with Peter Parker?

I'm surprised that Stella didn't set Risa off. Doesn't she fucking hate Loki and want to kill him?

>>31211407
Stella isn't Loki. She just might have a genetic connection to him that we're not privy to yet.

>>31211407
Different values/realities of Loki.

>>31209743
Homeless Quest and PPQ in one night, is this Christma-

Who the fuck are you?

>>31211407
Holy shit we need to go murder Stella

>>31210416
Like Peter needs more PTSD after this

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>>31211405
>HQR starring Peter Parker

I keep refreshing the catalog but it keeps not happening.

>inb4 Peter got sent to AoPH land

>>31211451
It's almost midnight.
It's not going to.

>>31211441
>>31211384
see
>>31211362

>36 (You don’t fall into the ocean)

You thwip your webs, no wait. You shoot your teenaged invented sticky white stuff off a nearby building. Leaping from the top you let out a girlish scream as you fall, then shoot a second web towards the warehouse. It sticks on the roof and you pull, hoping to stop the ride, and in a way it does. You just also happen to slam into the building and what sounds like two wrecking balls colliding echoes through the harbor.

You have skin harder than steel, you are able to walk on air, and you have magical go fast techniques. How was that scary for you? “Something about webs.” You explain pointing a finger at the drug runners. “Hey guys, don’t you think there is enough snow on the ground?” Boo. “Fuck off, I normally just eat the bastards.” You explain.

The runners pull their guns out and open fire almost at once. Luckily you were already diving behind a shipping container before they drew a good bead on you. Not that it would matter. “Look, we have to leave the city more or less intact for when real spider-man comes out unless we get bored. Can’t have people shooting at him just to find out if he is really bullet proof.” Like that superman bloke.

“I will not apologize.” You answer leaping over the crate.

You fire your webs at the men shooting at you and miss, bugger needs a laser sight on these or something for quick fire. You run forward at what you think is humanish speed and fire webs point blank at one of the gunman’s hands. The gun gets all webbed up and the hammer can’t go down so that is one problem down. You give him a gentle love tap to the chest and he goes flying back, slamming into their truck and making a dent in the side, two of the wheels going off the ground. “Oops.”
(1/2)

>>31211472
I wish it was canon though

Actually, laser sights would make quick firing easier. Someone make a note of that for the other guy. You fire more webs, aiming for the ground around the second gunman. He gets caught while trying to back away and trips, hitting the ground right on his chin. You kick his gun away before ducking behind the dented truck. “Geez, I really should consider bringing back up. Say, one of you mind coming over here so it can be an even two vs two? That seems fair.” You ask. They do not comply.

They run inside the warehouse in fact and continue firing as they shut the door. “Man, what the hell does he want from us?” One of them asks in Spanish. Oh yeah, I translate everything for you ever.

“I dunno, think he wants the coke?” Yes, but spider-man does not.

“Hey! Spider-Homie! You let us go you can have the whole truck!” One of the men shouts and you think over the offer.

You do like coke. But you are spiderman

[] “Dispose” of all of the coke before going after them. Bribing a super hero is an offence! (Use all the coke)
[] Dispose of the coke and go after them (Knock it into the ocean)
[] Accept the deal (You are an awful spider-man and I will shame you forever)
[] Other, please specify
(2/2)

>>31211472
Hey, Santa is real-ish.
It could still apply.

>>31211512
> [x] “Dispose” of all of the coke before going after them. Bribing a super hero is an offence! (Use all the coke)

>>31211512
>[] Accept the deal (You are an awful spider-man and I will shame you forever)

>>31211512
>[] Other, please specify
Become the coke santa. Coke for everyone!

This is getting Emenem Meets Punisher levels of crossover, but with Deadpool instead.
I think I'm out for the night.

>>31211499
It will probably be canon for Risa

not so much with Pete, maybe a terrible "I shouldn't eat jalapenos before bed" nightmare

>>31211512
>[] Dispose of the coke and go after them (Knock it into the ocean)

>>31211512
Shove the cocaine in our pants, get Inventory high.

>>31211512
Coke angels
SNORT IT ALL

>[x] “Dispose” of all of the coke before going after them. Bribing a super hero is an offence! (Use all the coke)

>>31211512
>[x] Dispose of the coke and go after them (Knock it into the ocean)

the fishes desperately need cocaine

>>31211512
>[] Dispose of the coke and go after them (Knock it into the ocean)
Lets TRY to not ruin Peter's life?

>>31211512
>[x] “Dispose” of all of the coke before going after them. Bribing a super hero is an offence! (Use all the coke)

>no Dr. Rockso yet
/tg/ I am disappoint.

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>>31211512
>[X] Dispose of the coke and go after them (Knock it into the ocean)


GREAT POWER.
GREAT RESPONSIBILITY.

We may not be Peter right now, BUT WE'RE THE GOSH DARN SPIDER-MAN.

And Felicia is still missing.

>>31211512
>[x] “Dispose” of all of the coke before going after them. Bribing a super hero is an offence! (Use all the coke)

>>31211512
>[] Other, please specify
Place Coke in Harry's place. Along with any other drugs we find. Then call the cops anonymously.

>>31211512
>[x] “Dispose” of all of the coke before going after them. Bribing a super hero is an offence! (Use all the coke)


HAPPENING >>31211554

>>31211584
It's not canon (post that said it was had the wrong trip) not to mention PPQ has a series of fake spider-men running around.
At least that's what the press thinks.

>>31211512
>[x] Dispose of the coke and go after them (Knock it into the ocean)

Remember what Uncle Ben said to Parker! Carry on the legacy!

If we're going to fall prey to some temptation, it shouldn't be to mundane drugs anyhow.

>>31211512
>[X] Dispose of the coke and go after them (Knock it into the ocean)

In the unlikely event that is is canon, let's not severely fuck up Peter's fragile teenaged mind even more, please?

>>31211512
>[x] “Dispose” of all of the coke before going after them. Bribing a super hero is an offence! (Use all the coke)

>>31211512
>“Dispose” of all of the coke before going after them. Bribing a super hero is an offence!
>>31211630
This isn't a body swap.

>>31211512
>[x] “Dispose” of all of the coke before going after them. Bribing a super hero is an offence! (Use all the coke)

>>31211512
>“Dispose” of all of the coke before going after them. Bribing a super hero is an offence!

>>31211512
[X] Accept the deal, then backstab them.

>>31211512
>[] Dispose of the coke and go after them (Knock it into the ocean)

>>31211512
>[x] “Dispose” of all of the coke before going after them. Bribing a super hero is an offence! (Use all the coke)

Looks like using all the coke before going after the ne'er do wells wins?

We are awesome at this job. Peter is going to be so psyked.

>>31211693
Think of it this way, we're fighting pollution by making sure the water isn't contaminated.

>>31211693
HAHA TIME FOR DRUGS!

>>31211693
What better way to win the war on drugs than to do so many drugs no one else can?
When you think about it like that, we're a martyr. A firm believer in the cause.

Oh, okay. Risa has the power to shapeshift into the form of Peter, then?

Its not Peter's actual body?

>>31211599
Damn this is a good idea

>>31211731

Yep.

See >>31209778

Beginning of the post indicates shapeshifting shenanigans.

>>31211599
Best plan. Lets do this thing!

>>31211752
Okay, good.

COCAAAAAAAIIIIINE!!!!

>>31211731
Yes.

Our real power level is low tier cosmic.

>>31211731
Yep. It's not Peter. Risa is a shapeshifter.

Did you miss the part where her arm turned into an abomination flower thing to craft the suit?

>>31211784
Well then, I think we can basically toss Kletus into the goddamn Sun.

WAIT A MINUTE, HOW STELLA ALIVE? HOW THE FUCK IS SHE STILL ALIVE?

>>31211820
What do you mean?

>>31211818
I'd rather eat him alive and figure out what super powers he had. Risa's a gourmet and all that. Can probably taste it.

>>31211820
Moreover, how did she not realize we weren't actually Peter?

>>31211834
Peter is in another universe.

The counter measures will not register Peter and will think he is dead due to him being in another dimension.

Thus Stella will died.

>>31211820
I didn't think the psychic bond meant that she dies if Peter dies.

Or is gone.

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235 KB JPG

>>31211859
You'd think that. But the Trickster God has other plans.

>>31211859
pretty obvious the countermeasures are transdimensional

You don’t fall to bribery so easily. You lash out with your suit, small razor like nails poking out of the ends and you slice open the coke. It spills out and you form it into a nice neat little pile. You hear the dealers talking in Spanish, wondering what it is you are doing.

So you show them. You lift up the mask, like you were going to kiss Tobey Maguire before he was awful and fall face first into the coke. You exhale once and mutate your internal systems so it becomes infinitely more efficient. You inhale deeply, consuming all of the coke in a single sitting and letting your body process it and then expunge it using your soul disposal system. You are the best at super heroing. You rub your nose before looking back at the warehouse, your little pick-me-up making you super stoked for this.

You coat your arms in raw spiritual power, a hissing violet light which seems to overwrite the daylight. You charge the warehouse and smash the wall in. “Ha ha ha! Spider-Man!” You shout firing webs at the dealers.

They fire at you, but with coke in your system you are fairly certain spider-man can dodge bullets. “Spider-Man!” You shout once more, laughing a throaty laugh as your intestines grow eyes for a second before remembering it isn’t their work day. Unions.

You leap forward and knee one in the groin region and throw him at his comrades, slamming them together before webbing them together. You laser the words “Spider-Man” into the ground before webbing out of there, sure the cops will arrive because you are from 1998 and what is a cell phone?

Man, you are awesome at this hero thing. But wait! There in the distance. Something feels like your teeth are humming together and you don’t like that much. A super powered ne’er do well?

Check it out?

[] No, regular crimes are just the worst
[] Yes. We don’t like magic people much other than us
[] Other, please specify

>>31211859
Nah, love can reach across dimensions.

>>31211863
Actually, it fucking does.

Remember she is a man made weapon and that is how to control her. If her handler dies, so does Peter.

>>31211877
>Yes. We don’t like magic people much other than us
Also we can eat them and take their powers.

>>31211877
>[] Yes. We don’t like magic people much other than us
Time to go deal with some magic shenanigans.

>>31211877
>[x] Yes. We don’t like magic people much other than us

>>31211859
>>31211874
This. Peter is not "dead" even if he is not there thus she is not triggered as dead

>>31211877
>[] Yes. We don’t like magic people much other than us

>>31211877
>[X] Yes. We don’t like magic people much other than us

SPIDER-MAN

>>31211903
This. Especially the part about eating them alive and stealing their powers.

>>31211877
>[x] Yes. We don’t like magic people much other than us

Okay magic man. teach me your secrets.

>>31211993
Oh god. What if he has magic bullets like that Reagan death squad?

>>31212025
The only thing threatening about the death squad was their space laser.

>>31211993
Poor Strange/Doom

>>31212042
The bullets were annoying as hell. Like hornets to normal people.

>>31212025
This is the future, what's they odds this reality has been in constant battle with heavenly agents...

Okay, yeah, pretty good. But we're Spiderman!

>>31212047
poor us if its DOOM
well I am sure we know to run form some one that overpowered

>>31212079
Spider man, spider man! Does a lot of spider coke!

>>31212110
>Spider-Bloke, Spider-Bloke! Does a lot of spider coke!

ftfy

>>31210670
[] “No! Just needed a good night’s rest is all. Just a bit, you know, tired from that yesterday stuff. Man was yesterday was sure yesterday, huh?” (Or other reassuring write in)

This seems reassuring to me, that and no one else is posting stuff.

>>31209743
>that mask
Did you do that or did Cosgrove?

You websling through the city, time changing frequencies to- wait what? “Oh yeah. Time isn’t a stream or a flow.” You explain hopping from rooftop to rooftop. “It’s more like a big orb with squiggly bits in it and it all sort of hums you see.” You say.

What? “Really. Look.” You explain stopping for a moment and humming, pouring your go-juice out through your tail. All around you, it feels as if a quake suddenly started but in a direction not in the third. Nothing move, yet you are still acutely aware of the shake. You stop after a moment and nod. “Time quake. You can make a really nice one if you get a good falsetto in the wings.” You explain hopping over the streets and curbs.

You land on the rooftop overlooking the strange energy reading and find several small demonic looking things which smell of nightmares and hate. Stopping them is a man with grey hair and sort of an ugly outfit. Who the hell does this wanker think he is? He looks up at you and holds out his hand. “Stay back spider-man! These foes are from the dark realm, beyond mortal kind’s understanding! Should they get a hold of you they will turn your greatest fears into food and use it to gain a grip in this world! Fear not, I Doctor Strange, am more than magically capable of handling these beasts!” The man, Doctor Strange, yells at you.

I wonder if they know Caede? “That might be quite nice, wouldn’t it? We should eat him and-“ Hey! No, remember? Being a hero? “But he might give me powers!” You protest weakly, sulking a little. Risa, what would The Doctor do?

You grumble a non-answer as you kick the ground idly.

[] Help Doctor Strange
[] Leave him, he said he got this
[] Attack Strange
[] Other, please specify

>>31212183
>[X] Help Doctor Strange

We do NOT want to antagonize him.

>>31212171
I did.

>>31212183
>[] Help Doctor Strange

>>31212183
>[] Help Doctor Strange
EAT THE DEMONS!

>>31212183
>[] Help Doctor Strange
Eat ALL the demons. That's sure to fuck with his head.

>>31212183
>Help Doctor Strange
"If you didn't notice anything off about me, you need all the help you can get."

>>31212183
>>31212221
This sounds like an excellent course of action

>>31212221
This is a good plan.

Oh boy Spiderman que-

What the fuck is going on here?

>>31212183
>[x] Other, please specify
SPIDER MAN, SPIDER MAN! MORE MAGICALLY CAPABLE THAN DOCTOR STRANGE THINKS HE IS!
And then do a time-quake. Because we can totally do that. I dunno if it will help, but it will be interesting!

>>31212183
>[x] Leave him, he said he got this

is CBGB still around?

>>31212100
at least it isn't squirrel girl

>>31212183
>[] Help Doctor Strange
"By the webby spinnerets of justice, I can't leave you alone! Allow me, Spider-Man, Spider of Manly Justice to assist you!
SPIDER-MAN!

Then start singing the theme to the 1977 Spider-Man tv show while fighting the monsters.

>>31212245
April Fools Day.

>>31212183
>[] Help Doctor Strange

>>31212260
>at least it isn't squirrel girl
Oh god. We need to stay at least 100 miles away from Doreen at all times. Running into her would be the worst possible situation.

>>31212245
Risa got transported to PPQverse.

Peter Parker got transported to HQRverse.

Not a body swap, it's actually Risa herself here and Peter himself there.

I think you want >>31211554

Right now, Pete's in a Mormon church and shit is about to go down;

Right then.

Please roll 1d100 for demon fightan. Best of first five

>>31212183
>[] Help Doctor Strange

We can do the hero thing while eating all the nibbles.
He's clearly kind of magic, our true form won't drive him completely insane. There is the Black Spiderman running around town too.

Rolled 45

>>31212298

Rolled

>>31212298

Rolled 44

>>31212298
Spider-Man, Spider-Man.

Rolled 42

>>31212298

Rolled 34

>>31212298
We are the best at demon fighting

I want to suggest using gravity powers.

>>31212285
>>31212285
But if we manage to out bullshit her and consume her
WE WILL BECOME ALL POWERFUL

Rolled 56

>>31212298

Rolled 25

>>31212298

Rolled 45

>>31212298

>>31212353
Just remember, this is a text quest. We constantly count as being off-panel.

>>31212323
This one fucked up.

>>31212354
That means this one wins.

>>31212354
We are adequate at fighting demons.

>>31212353
>implying Squirrel Girl can ever lose
>you're an edrich abomination
>she manhandles shit likt that on the daily; the stronger you are, the easier you are
Son I don't think you know how fucked you'd be.

>>31212353
You don't understand.

We will fail. And we will most likely fail so spectacularly that our entire perception of reality will crumble to dust.
Doreen is NOT to be fucked with.

>>31212390
So long as we use bullshit powers and not webslingers, I think we did some damage.

>>31212374
does deadpool exist in this quests universe?
just curious

>>31212287
Ok, have fun.
I'll be in the hollow quest

>>31212404
>>31212396
We'd just want to touch her tail. Clearly you need to get in Risa's head.

I should say against scrub demons this was a roll to see how well you pretended to be spider-man.

>>31212411
He was in the Christmas special along with Squirrel Girl acting as the "host"

In short; we don't know yet.

>>31212396
She defeated Thanos. Not a clone of Thanos, not a projection of Thanos, but THE Thanos.
And she did it without breaking a sweat.

>>31212404
we could spend a fate breaker to make her crit fail kicking our ass, sure we'd still get out ass kicked, but hey, something hilarious would happen during said beating

>>31212427
Wait we're still attempting that with our eldritch costume?

>>31212427
Oh shit. I guess Strange just detected the shit out of us.

>>31212425
>We'd just want to touch her tail.
Oh god that's worse. Everything went to shit last time we tried to touch fluffy tail. It'd be like some sort of super singularity of going to shit if we tried to touch Squirrel Girl's fluffy tail.

>>31212464
Risa isn't Peter.

>>31212451
We used our Superior Durable Suit as the base. It looks similar to our original outfit.

>>31212478
exactly, her tail can't be as fluffy as our tails

You leap down to help Doctor Strangelove. Yeah, that’s his name now. You land on the ground and immediately the demons charge at you. You keep your witty recourse, though it eventually turns into colorful British slang regarding their parentage but you manage to keep it sort of witty and that counts right?

You fire your web shooters at one of the demons, catching and holding them for a second before giving a gentle kick to another one of them. The kick makes them step back and you applaud your self-control until a massive axe slams into your face and sends you spinning back.

It hurts, a little, but you regularly feel more pain when you recreationally torture yourself. Maybe you should see a shrink? “Foolish mortal! You stand before Nyx’thilebane! Have you chosen the nightmare you shall feed me?!” He demands launching himself at you.

You push yourself off the ground, your gravitational manipulation making it look like you put way more force into it than you did and you take a few steps back. “Say, er, Nyxy? You wouldn’t happen to know Caede would you? Hell Knight, former scion of Beelzebub, lord of flies?” You ask and he lets out a roar as he swings his axe again.

You side step, but a spray of acid gets all over your new suit! Your magic enchantments seem to have held however and you web his axe to the ground. You run over to his axe and leap off of it, performing and acrobatic kick to his face and making a comment about his breath stinking. He takes a step back and the throws a punch. You glance to strange and note he is busy with the other scrubs so you hold up your hand coated with a small orb of violet energy.
(1/2)

>>31212639
So, now we just caught the attention of Mephisto by wrecking his lackies.

Oh dear.

His fist stops as it collides with it, but he continues pushing at the raw soul energy you hold. “Foolish magician! I am Nyx’thilebane! I slew countless in the wars of hell! I shall stand beside the darkchild as she rides with pandora's forces against the darkest darkness! I walked in shadows you would not have dared dream of! Fear me! I am Nyx’thilebane! Devourer of all Midnight!” He proclaims and you smile.

“Fear me. I am Risa,” You reply twisting your hand to the side and bringing his arm down with it. “Breaker of Fate.” You say before letting out a massive burst of your raw power as you collide your fist with his disgusting face.

He goes wide eyes as the gravity aided blow, combined with your supernatural strength, crush his face in. Then sinks into his body. Then further. His back explodes as goopy acidic entrails fall to the ground and start burning holes into the stone.

Strange, too busy with the last of his scrubs, doesn’t notice you are where the power surge came from, though he no doubt felt it. You help him finish up the rest of the scrubs, their moral low due to the destruction of their leader. Strange looks at the remains of the beast and strokes his beard. “Not bad Spider-Man! You are no Sorcerer, and I could have certainly taken him. I just hope fighting with me was able to teach you something useful! Here, would you like an autograph?” He asks pulling out a signed photo.

“By the way, what was that surge of power before?” He wonders partially to himself.

[] “Dunno, don’t care. Thanks for the glossy I will give you one of my head shots some time!”
[] “Probably the demon’s death scream or something like that.”
[] “It was me! Spider-Man!”
[] “A phenomenally powerful cosmic abomination who delights itself in crushing lesser things for the pure joy of joy”
[] Other, please specify
(2/2)

>>31212443
You forgot that it was not a simucron either

>>31212677
>[x] “Probably the demon’s death scream or something like that.”

It tried to lash out at me with a hugely telegraphed and very theatrical super-powerful attack, but I managed to cold-clock him before he could finish.

So are the people who actually followed PPQ voting here, or is it primarily hollow-questers?

>>31212677
>[x] “A phenomenally powerful cosmic abomination who delights itself in crushing lesser things for the pure joy of joy”
>[x] "It went that way!" and then point into the sewers
I want to laugh at the thought of this dude romping around in poo

>>31212677
>[x] “Dunno, don’t care. Thanks for the glossy I will give you one of my head shots some time!”

I dunno, weather balloons?

>>31212677
>[] “Dunno, don’t care. Thanks for the glossy I will give you one of my head shots some time!”


>[] “A phenomenally powerful cosmic abomination who delights itself in crushing lesser things for the pure joy of joy”

>>31212677
>[] Other, please specify
That was my Spider-Themed Limit Break powered by the power of multiple cosmic gems that are suppose to be in a nifty gold mitten.
I call it Maximum Spider!

>>31212677
"What surge of power? You'd need magic senses to notice something like that or something. Which I don't have. Because I'm Spider-Man, who isn't magic."

>>31212677
>[] “A phenomenally powerful cosmic abomination who delights itself in crushing lesser things for the pure joy of joy”

then srug

>>31212720
This.

>>31212677
>[x] “Probably the demon’s death scream or something like that.”

>>31212677
>[] “A phenomenally powerful cosmic abomination who delights itself in crushing lesser things for the pure joy of joy”

>>31212677
>[x] “A phenomenally powerful cosmic abomination who delights itself in crushing lesser things for the pure joy of joy”

>>31212677
>[] “A phenomenally powerful cosmic abomination who delights itself in crushing lesser things for the pure joy of joy”