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File: 1391475787321.jpg-(104 KB, 558x790, oniichanitstoobig.jpg)
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Better Late than Never Edition!

You are Shax Bonemurder, Raid Leader!

You went to a hut and found a weirdo who wanted you to beat up people that were mean to him. And also get his stuff, you guess. What are you, some kinda bully? But he promised to give you neat things so you'll consider not blowing his house up!

>CURRENT RAID ROSTER: http://pastebin.com/mZgVD5yH

>Ability tree update! I have provided bonus names on the visualization! After your eyes recover and you're capable of seeing again, you'll notice I have provided no descriptions. You can speculate wildly what they do!

>ABILITY TREE: http://pastebin.com/aBfqv1vP

You also finally got around to figuring out what the heck those magical items you've raided do. They seem a little... weak? Compared to the magical items you've heard of in stories! Who even cares about a stick that can turn into a snake? You sure don't!

Anyway, it is a brand new day! You check your quest log and see that The Forest adventuring area has been 100% completed. Wow, what a load off your chest! You wonder if there is some sort of meta-award for this?

>There isn't.

Still, you do have an actual job you should probably be doing... What's the plan boss?

>That quest log is awfully lonely. We should explore the surrounding areas!
>Let's earn our pay! To the Manderlin Plains! "but boss we don't get paid nothin'"
>>
>>30002022
>That quest log is awfully lonely. Explore surrounding areas!
>>
>>30002022
>Let's earn our pay! To the Manderlin Plains! "but boss we don't get paid nothin'"

Let's go RAIDING!
>>
>>30002022
>Let's earn our pay! To the Manderlin Plains! "but boss we don't get paid nothin'"
>>
>>30002022
>>That quest log is awfully lonely. We should explore the surrounding areas!

Doing your job is for pussies
>>
You'll explore the PLAINS OF MANDERLIN while raiding it, then. Since you people don't know how to break ties!

Writing!
>>
>>30002022
>That quest log is awfully lonely. We should explore the surrounding areas!
>>
>>30002302
>Tie-breaker less than two seconds later

That being said, if I knew both was an option I would've chose it. Always pick both unless you're picking all-of-the-above.
>>
You should raid! But you're not really in the mood. But you really should...

Fine! You guess you will. But you'll take it easy. An easy leisurely raid!

After the morning training routine, you go to rouse the boys.

"Alright! Listen up. We got some wounded, so we won't be at full strength this time. But we're still raiding! We're raiders so we ain't got much choice, right boys?" The logic was flawless, and they couldn't think of a reason to argue. "So everyone, mount up! We got work to do!"

Today was warm and sunny so everyone was a little uncomfortable in general. A bunch of grumbling was heard all around as people got ready.

"This one would inquire something of you, Honored One," Whoop begins solemnly as he approaches you. "Many of the honored flock who attend this one's ceremonies are wounded, and watching over them in their time of need would be a great relief, if you would allow it."

He's being super humble about a simple request. No real harm in letting him have his way, right? Besides, you should have someone at camp to watch the wounded. "Sure thing, Whoop. You and your fish guys can stay behind if you'd like." You're gettin a little low on people... Still. It shouldn't be too tough!.
>>
After everyone loads up, you start heading out. There was a small farm, and a small village from the last time you raided. The hamlet doesn't have a clock tower... Come to think of it, you don't know much about the local places in the Plains. You don't wnat to admit it, but you also are feeling super lazy.

Like crazy lazy. You sorta want to relax a while. Time to call the raid to a stop! Still, you gotta act like you're doing something.

"Hey, uh, Gneb!"

"Yeah, boss?"

"We need more information on the surrounding area, right? Who even cares about raiding that small farm, yeah?" Gneb nods. They couldn't have that much loot. "So... we oughta find some juicier targets, in my opinion. Make a couple of scouting parties and go find interesting stuff! Not boring tiny farms!"

Gneb shrugs. "I don't know why we wouldn't just raid small stuff, though. It isn't like we gotta raid anything in particular. Anyway, what counts as 'interesting', anyways?"

>Obviously he'll report anything he finds. But where should he ead out to? The smaller party will head in the direction you don't choose, and as a result, will find less stuff.
>Western Plains. This is heading away from the Manderlin Capital.
>Northern Plains. This heads towards the Manderlin Capital.
>>
>>30002656
Western
>>
>>30002656
>Northern Plains. This heads towards the Manderlin Capital.

"Because Greb, if we only raid small places we'll only get small amounts of shinies. And we want big amounts of shinies, so we'll have to raid big places.

Duh."
>>
>>30002656
>Northern Plains. This heads towards the Manderlin Capital.

We'd like to know sooner rather than later about anything in that direction
>>
>>30002694
This
>>
North it is. Writing.
>>
The north is the capital right? You'd definitely want to know what is up that way before you kick up a fuss.

You tell Gneb that small targets only get you small loot. Gneb tells you small targets don't get you dead. You tell Gneb that he should just go back home to his momma since he clearly isn't cut out to be a raider. He pouts for a bit. You apologize. He says that he forgives you. You tell Gneb to check out the northern plains before you head back to relax.

You relaxed so much that you ended up taking a nap. Some of the boys said you snored, but you're pretty certain you don't snore so that is a ridiculous suggestion. It takes a long time, but the small party comes back. They said they found a few more villages and some scattered farms. No clock tower, though. You're not entirely sure they know what a clock tower looks like so you made sure you asked told them, using your watch as an example.

"I've been meanin' to ask, lass, but do you even know how to read one of those?"

"You don't read watches, silly, you look at them because they are shiny." That's like asking if you've ever read a sword or a golden cup. Dorle can be stupid sometimes.

"No, then. Alright, let me explain it to you..."

A short time later you learned a lot of things including that people somehow decided that life should be divided up into imaginary numbers that reflect when things are happening. This seems counter productive to avoiding trouble and work and responsibility so you are, overall, not very impressed with this idea. Too bad most of society decided on it without you ages ago!

"Did you really not know what hours and minutes are?" Milda asks, concerned.

"'Course I did!" You pout, "Hours just meant a long time, minutes meant a long time when waiting and a short time when doing, and seconds were so fast no one cared about them."

No one argued.
>>
Gneb finally gets back after an hour ten minutes and forty seven seconds since you were told about how to read a watch. He has some interesting things to say! He gives a report of what all he found:

Clock Tower Town, heavily guarded already.
An abandoned tower far away from the various towns.
Three large towns, he was pretty sure they didn't see him.
Two medium sized towns.
Five small towns.
A burnt out circular stone building of some kind.
Several caravan routes that are heavily patrolled.
A massive trading center.
Dozens of small farms.
Four big farms.
A lake that he didn't see the other side of, but has one fishing village on it that he could see.

Sounds like you'll be busy. Let's get started!

>What do you hit up?
>>
>>30003289
>A burnt out circular stone building of some kind.

This one got me curious. It's all mysterious-like so it has to have something important, right?
>>
>>30003289
Several caravan routes that are heavily patrolled.

Let's set up ambushes along the caravan routes, caravans are meant to transport shiny things so they're sure to have cool loot.
>>
>>30003289
Take out all the farms, except one. Then go for the caravans.
>>
Caravan raiding? Maybe you can actually be considered a raider! Writing.
>>
Caravans are relatively small, self contained, and filled with loot, right? Should be ideal targets! You tell Gneb to show you some of the routes out there so you can keep them in mind. After some organization, you head out.

He shows you three different routes:

The first one is barely more than a dirt trail. You observe it for a few days. It seems small caravans travel up and down the roads regularly, and are lightly guarded. Not much here, but it'd be super easy to hit.

The second is a well paved thing that you had trouble watching. You only kept an eye on it for a day. It had a ton of traffic up and down, with anything from light caravans to a huge merchant procession. It is super well guarded. You could probably get away with hitting it a few times.

The third is a strange one. It has a ton of traffic on it, but it appears to be unconventional caravans. Housing mostly extremely well guarded, but small units that all seem to head off in random directions after a certain point. You're not sure what is up with this one.

Which one do you want to hit first?

>First one. Let's start small!
>Second one. Let's get crazy!
>Third one. The curiosity is killing me!
>>
>>30003869
>Third one. The curiosity is killing me!
>>
>>30003869
>Third one. The curiosity is killing me!
>>
>>30003869
[X] Third one
Anything that makes people act all weird must be good!
>>
Gonna be hard to break that one. Writing.
>>
>>30004017
Oh, by the way, I found out that Shax is the name of one of the 72 spirits of Solomon.
>>
>>30004141

Don't read too far into it. She isn't about to summon demon horses!

Yet.
>>
>>30004017
Well, you know what they say

Go big or go home.

Besides, maybe Shax will get some good luc-Pfffahahahahahahaha no.
>>
Well, no point sitting around trying to figure things out. You aren't smart enough to do it, and you don't want to keep the boys waiting out here in the plains for too long. Bored goblins quickly turn into dead goblins. So, it's time to hit up a caravan!

You wait around until you see one that is reasonably smaller than the others. You don't want to take on one of those sixty man monsters you saw wandering down this road. It only has ten or so people in it, which should be more than enough for you to handle!

You wait till they are good and isolated, and set off at a charge! Time to hit them fast and hard. Dorle tosses some grenades, you hit them with slings, the boys get in contact and... what the heck? This is too easy! You basically wipe them out in one go. You barely even get a prisoner.

It's a young elven girl in a breastplate with a spear. You take her aside for interrogation.

"Tell me what you know!" You shout. This worked well last time.

"What do you want from me?" The girl is practically in tears. You don't know how old she is. She is an elf so it is probably a stupid number like three hundred or something. "What is happening?!" People sure are bad at interrogations. You'd slap her but you don't want to hurt your wrist.

"What do you mean what is happening? We raided you! You're on a trade route, right? Don't these get raided a lot?" You're pretty sure that is the entire point of being a raider and being a caravan guard. It's all prearranged, isn't?

"There isn't much trading on this road. The Royal Adventurer's Association uses it as the main dispatch point for the official questing groups..."

Adventurers! But weren't these guys super weaked compared to what you're used to?

>What do you want to ask her about?
>>
>>30004390

Give us your schedule and quest logs and stuffs!

We're super cunning, we can uses the logs to avoid or ambush Adventuring companies.
>>
>>30004390
>why are you so weak if you're adventurers

don't worry about slapping her shax
>>
>>30004390
"You guys are kinda weak for adventurers. And I mean super weak.

Tell me about the Royal Adventurer's Association thingy. Tell me about the other trade routes. How old are you? Are there any weaknesses to the defenses of the Clock Tower Town, what is that town called anyways?"
>>
Alright. Asking some questions. Writing.
>>
>>30004390
Adventurers? But you are weak, really weak. I bet I could lift you up one handed weak

Adventurers are scary fire breathing monsters that slay entire goblin cities and take all the shinies before breakfast
>>
"I don't wanna be rude, but," You begin hesitantly, "Aren't you, like, super weak?" Seriously, you don't think anyone got hurt other than Nost who fell off his mount somehow even though you're pratically strapped in.

The girl looks a bit ashamed. "Well, you see... Several official questing groups are more like training parties. We work together to help beat small easy things so we can all figure out how to fight better." This is the stupidest thing you've ever heard. "Most of us aren't really strong until later. I'm willing to bet the people you ran into weren't full fledged adventurers, though. The really famous ones could probably wipe out your group here no problem." You cross your arms. "Ah! I'm not trying to boast or anything, really! They're just super strong. And they often work on this road. I'd advise against hitting it often."

"Okay. Thanks!" You wonder why she is telling you this, though. Didn't you murder a bunch of her friends just now?

"To be honest, I'm kind of fed up with the whole system. I'm always paired up with a bunch of jerks who never share the loot." You nod sagely. You'd hate if no one shared the loot. "Everytime someone suggests doing something cool, the rest just look at me with this 'but she'd get in the way' kinda look and sigh." Wow, she seems to be getting upset. "Like, how am I even supposed to get better if we never try anything difficult? Am I supposed to just stab zombies until I magically know how to fight better? Who would even think something like that'd work! It's so dumb!" She looks at you and stands up with a fist shaking. "You understand right?! Doesn't everyone think you're a stupid and useless just because you're a girl?!"

This is getting uncomfortable. Actually, you've never had that problem. Also, haven't you fought a bunch of female adventurers? "Ah, are you sure this isn't, you know, all in your mind?"
>>
She lets out a loud harumph. "You're probably just saying that because you've beaten up a bunch of dwarf ladies. People don't pick on them. It is different when you're an elf. 'Oh, you should be a mage.' 'Your hair is so silky smooth, you are my eternal muse.' 'Aren't you just beautiful? You shouldn't be on the battlefield.' Dwarf women don't have that problem!"

You let her rant for a while. Precisely two hours, three minutes, and five seconds! It is a lot of self pitying shallow stuff that you never worried or thought about or cared about. And none of it sounds remotely true. "How old are you?" You're forced to ask after a while.

"What? Um, I'm just over twenty two. I had to run away from my family to get out of the Forest so young." Isn't that, like, five in elf years? You're pretty sure Beyto said he was over a hundred. You haven't extensively interacted with elves, but you're confident they are all super old. "What does that have to do with anything? Anyway! It was three months ago whe-"

"HeycanIseeyourquestlog?" Please stop talking please stop talking.

"Oh! I can only show that to members of my party. Sorry!" She looks genuinely unhappy about it. "Actually, how about I join your party? A strong, confident woman like yourself. Well, I think I could learn a lot from you! Maybe even grow as an adventurer. Besides, we're basically best friends now."

Are you even any of those things she just said at all? You're pretty sure none of them apply to you.

>Wow this lady is too high maintenance. Sorry! I just wanted some questions answered!
>Is she for serious? Well, we'll see if she works out?
>>
>>30005272
tell her to check her privledge
>>
>>30005345
>Is she for serious? Well, we'll see if she works out?

Sure, it might be amusing, we'll get more info on the surrounding areas from her. And worst happens we kill her.
>>
>>30005345
>Is she for serious? Well, we'll see if she works out?

People who live as long as she has tend to know a lot of things. Maybe she can tell Whoop some ancient elf secrets.
>>
>>30005345
>Is she for serious? Well, we'll see if she works out?
>>
>>30005345
>Is she for serious? Well, we'll see if she works out?
Man she talks alot. But that means if we get friendly, she might talk about the good stuff. Like raid-able stuff!
>>
>>30005345
>Accept her into your party for however long you need to look at her quest log and have Milda copy it.
>Then kill her, too high maintenance.
>>
>>30005345
We'll make her carry stuff around and she can do all the shitty dangerous jobs!
>>
>>30005420
Well it seems like she wants to do the dangerous stuff anyway.
>>
>>30005345
>Is she for serious? Well, we'll see if she works out?

She can join the Benign Auxiliary Indispensable Troop.
>>
You're actually recruiting her? Haha, okay. Writing!
>>
>>30005487

This must be a thing. Also, its an in to start recruiting a merry band of misfits!

Then we kill them all when we're done with the mission.
>>
>>30005537
We're equal opportunity evil.
>>
>>30005537
they can be pretty stupid
>>
>>30005565
Yep. Everyone gets an equal opportunity to fail horribly and die.

If she complains about raiding then she out.
>>
>>30005655
But if she does well we may have an upcoming evil bitch lady it round out the team.
>>
You cringe a bit. You really want to see her quest log. You also know that she is insufferable. But, perhaps, given time she will one day maybe be a great ally! This is a long term investment. You've never made one of those before, as you keep figuring you'll be dead long before they pay off. Somehow, you don't care if you die before this one does.

"Okay, you can join the 'party'. First rule of the party is that I'm the boss, and you call it a 'raid' not a 'party'."

"Ooh, I've always wanted to join a raid!" You feel like that means something incredibly different to her.

"Second rule is that you gotta show me your quest log. Like right now." You're pretty good at making up rules on the fly.

"Is that a rule, or more of an order? I can follow orders." She takes out a worn, leather bound journal and hands it to you.

>The Ancient Tomb of Yisiligor. Recommended for very experienced adventurers. Lich resides within.
>A strange group of gnolls is slowly growing in the far western plains. Disperse their group.
>An ancient earth elemental has wiped out a quarry. Investigate!
>Rumors of kuo-toa raids on the eastern shores have been growing. Investigate!
>Dark cults have been kidnapping young women throughout the Manderlin Towns. Find their hideout and defeat the mastermind.
>A powerful warlock has retreated to the depths of the forest. Recommend for very experienced adventurers. Highly dangerous.
>Travel to our allies in Stonedance to escort an older High Cleric of Aummathon to the various villages for his blessing.

Wow this is a lotta info. Sorta strange seeing things from the other side.

"Alright, thanks. Oh, by the way... What's your name?"

"I'm pretty sure I've mentioned it several times. Alloces Tathlithe. What's yours?"

"Shax Bonemurdered. Nice to meet you. Now try to keep up! We've got raiding to do."

>How do you want to work it?
>Hit some farms on the way back to camp.
>Hit a few smaller towns on the way back.
>Go by something else entirely on the way back.
>>
>>30005982
>Hit a few smaller towns on the way back.

Time for town raiding!
>>
>>30005982
>Hit a few smaller towns on the way back.
>>
>>30005982
Hit somma dem small towns
>>
>>30005982
>Hit a few smaller towns on the way back.
Break in the new recruit.
>>
>>30005982
>Dark cults have been kidnapping young women throughout the Manderlin Towns. Find their hideout and defeat the mastermind.

This one seems intriguing. If we could get these guys on our side we might be able to summon devils or something. Devils are cool, right?
>>
>>30006152
There pretty cool and having some cult members would add to our variety of evil.
>>
Alright. Give me some d20 rolls!
>roll 3d20. Same rules as always. Each roll counts for an individual raid (first, second, third).
>>
Rolled 17, 11, 7 = 35

>>30006217
>>
Rolled 5, 10, 10 = 25

>>30006217
>>
Rolled 6, 17, 17 = 40

>>30006217
>>
Rolled 20, 18, 11 = 49

>>30006217
>>
Rolled 17, 19, 15 = 51

>>30006217
>>
Rolled 14, 8, 16 = 38

>>30006172
Heck what they do is kind of like raiding already! This is something to look into maybe.

>>30006217
>>
Alright! Time to get to work. Writing!
>>
>>30006231
>>30006238
>>30006248
>>30006253
>Not a single 1

What the fuck
>>
Rolled 10, 18, 2 = 30

>>30006333
I don't know about the other people, but I've only ever gotten one one offa rolls.
Which kinda makes me really paranoid everytime I roll.
>>
You tell the lads to hit up some towns on the way back. You've been out for several days, so you gotta bring something worth looting to make it all worth it! Gneb knows several towns and with a little effort you plot out a course. With some advice from Milda, you make the targets zig zag effectively to avoid painting a large line to the forest.

The goblins are pretty nervous around Alloces. No one is really sure how to treat her, and she yammers on to anyone who will listen. This has led her to sitting around with one of the deep trolls, talking to it as it drools thoughtlessly. She's taken to calling it 'Alfonse' for whatever reason. So everyone started calling it Alfonse instead of Troll Two. You kinda miss the old name. She's making it wear some sort of tiny hat, and often has some sort of ribbons on it. You would feel pity for it, but you have to admit it is sort of cute.

When you finally get to the first hamlet, you tell Alloces that she is in the vanguard with the trolls and the big guys. It's time to test her mettle! And it was tested. The town had a reasonable force of guards. Way more than you were expecting. Only one person got hurt, and it was just stupid Nost again. He thinks he twisted his ankle. Who even cares. The town had a lot of trinkets, but not much food. No adventurers were seen.

By the second town, people had started to get along with Alloces some more. She was laughing at their jokes, and not being generally insufferable anymore. Maybe she has taken to this raiding thing? The second town also went smoothly. There were less guards, but less loot over all. No one got hurt! Still, it had more food than treasures. Which is more important to you. It'd be sweet to fill a room with jewelry, but why even bother if you're hungry? That doesn't mean you don't keep every necklace, ring, and earring you see.
>>
You quickly hit the third town, not wanting word to spread too much about your attacks. Still, you actually encounter a band of adventurers there. They put up a stiff resistence, and Milda got slightly hurt. She laughs it off, saying it is nothing serious, but you're still worried. You like Milda, after all! Gonna be a shame to see her out of comission.

It's a long way home, but when you get there Whoop greets you. He's apparently been super worried since you've been gone so long. What a nice guy! You introduce him to Alloces. They seem pretty suspicious of each other. Apparently Alloces has had several run ins with kuo-toa and does not like their practices at all. Whoop and her have several heated arguments, and you think it is the first time you've ever seen the fish guy mad. You keep a mental note to not make fun of his mom. He really doesn't take it well at all.

You divvy up the loot, and settle in. Alloces drags Alfonse with her to the room you sleep in. She treats him like a big pet. She keeps cleaning him up, too, so he doesn't smell so bad. That's a lot of dedication, you guess? You try to go to sleep but she basically talks to you all night. Or to Alfonse. You think she might be secretly super lonely. Even though it took a while, somehow, you sleep better than you have in a long time.
>>
Gonna have to cut the thread short for now! Something hs come up I have to get to early in the morning.

The good news is I got tomorrow off. If this thread is still up in the afternoon, I'll pick it up from there! If not I'll just make a new one.

I'm not giving out exp, because we haven't hit where I want to stop yet... Unfortunately.
>>
>>30006619
See you later Chief, thank you for running!
>>
>>30006619
yus
much excite
many anticipate
such tomorrow
wow
>>
>>30006647

I almost forgot the most important thing!

Thank you everyone for playing! Every person who participates is so great and I really appreciate you all!
>>
Rolled 10, 2, 16 = 28

>>30006681
I'm wondering if there is going to be some kind of party dynamic's system? Where certain member work better or worse depending on who they're grouped with.
>>
>>30006681
You're the most awesome person.

Who was Alfonse again?
>>
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>>30006681
Ohh stop it, you're making me blush!

>>30006817
Troll #2
>>
>>30006835
How am I a troll? It was just a...
Oh. The troll. As in one of the trolls. Thanks.
>>
What class is Alloces supposed to be anyway?
>>
I always miss these threads. Chief Fouldrinker, you are a nice person.
>>
>>30006681

I love you too, man. Too bad I don't get to participate due to timezones but don't forget about us archive lurkers!
>>
>>30006619
Shaxbot bump
>>
>>30010111

SERVANT CLASS LANCER

In all actuality she is a trainee. It is only through your guidance that she can grow into something great.

Not everything is an export from 3.5! Just a lot of stuff.

Not sure on ETA for when I can resume, but I'll let you know on twitter and, obviously, be making updates in this thread.
>>
>>30014403
It's not like I even want her to grow into something.
I just want her to help keep Shax alive.
>>
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>>30014533
Considering how much she dotes on Alfonse if we take Like A Stray Cat she'll probably be pretty damn invested in keeping Shax alive.

Of course there's the serious risk of getting dressed up in frilly clothes, and getting taken home.
>>
Hit it very hard
>>
>>30014588
Shax could not put up with her bullshit.
Stray Cat is a no-go.
>>
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>>30014951
But we can't be the fucking Dark Queen without it.
>>
>>30014971

Treacherous as the Seas! Stronger than the foundations of the Earth!
>>
I bump because I must.
>>
You wake up feeling fully refreshed in your little corner. Alloces is sprawled out in the middle of the floor snoring loudly like you absolutely don't. At least she doesn't let much slow her down. Alfonse is staring at a wall. You kinda liked your dark spooky room better when no one was in it. Still, you do some stretching and head out of the creepy basement to the rest of the camp. "mornin' boss" It's good to be greeted. "hey boss, you think I got a chance with that elf girl?" You hope not. "got too much food, boss. Most of it is gonna spoil." I have no time for people who can imagine 'enough food' "I found this lizard can I keep it?" Lizards are gross, but so are you so sure. "feelin' better boss, me and the other wounded were makin' bets on when you would get back." What the heck were they using to bet?

It's good to be the leader! You go out to the small clearing where you can get your morning practice in, and start up the routines you have completely memorized now. After you sit down to rest, Kuzr comes running up to you. "Hey, boss, some people are approachin' the camp. Look like dark elves."

Oh? You suppose it has been several days. It might be an advanced party. You grab your stuff and get some of the boys to come with you to meet them. It's a small group of maybe four drow, eight orcs, and two ogres.

"Raid Leader," the lead pretty drow woman says, greeting you. "I've come to see how you've progressed, and provide relief if necessary. How many casualties have you sustained?"

"Only one goblin died, but he got mixed up in a messy situation," you say while picking your teeth. Part of a chicken is caught in there and it is really annoying you.

"One?" The lady raises her eyebrow, "How much raiding have you actually done?"
>>
"Oh, we've hit one big farm and three small towns. Also we've cleared out most of this forest 'cept for one hut with a weirdo in it. He's okay, though. There is also an earth elemental who talked a bunch and gave me his rock pets. He used to talk through them but now he doesn't and I assume that is 'cause he doesn't care about them any more or something, but they are mine now so it is okay," You finally got that piece of gristle out. You try to not be disgusting in disposing of it. "Oh, we also hit up a caravan of trainees and took them out except for one blabbermouth elf girl who decided to join us for some reason."

The dark elf woman looks surprised. "And you've only lost one member of the raid?"

"Yep. Oh! I also got all sorts of info, if that's important?" You get out your 'quest log' which is really more of a ratty piece of paper with barely legible scribbles on it and show it to her. She looks dumbfounded at it for a while, so you point out what the words mean. Maybe she never learned how to read? That's okay, you know plenty of illiterate people.

She turns her back and converses with her party for a while. That is honestly pretty rude! As she turns back around, she approaches you. "You have honestly done better than any of us were expecting... Though perhaps you've been a bit too cautious in your raiding. Still, the information you have gathered on the situation in these plains makes up for it."

>You receive a B+ raider grade! Maybe you oughta do more raiding. Still, you got these sidequests on LOCK. And you've kept your folks alive! Good job!

"I'll take this information back to the main army. They'll be more than happy to see how you've been doing. would you like for me to pass along any messages?"

>Anything you'd like to ask from the main army? Any messages you'd like to send to people in the main army?
>>
>>30016095
Tell the squidy guy thanks for the trolls
>>
>>30016095
>>Anything you'd like to ask from the main army? Any messages you'd like to send to people in the main army?
Tell Squid Face we said hello! His trolls have been supre useful!
>>
>>30016095
I guess we can send a message to Beyto and Squid Face and whoever that blacksmith lady was called to thank them for helping us become a successful Raid Leader.
>>
>>30016095
Ask for Beyto. This leader stuff is real hard and you need to yell at someone more competent than you!
Some more Goblins would be nice too.
>>
>>30016163
We don't even need mounts, we always have some wounded guys who have to stay over at the base.
If nothing else, they can scout.
>>
>>30016095
I agree with the rest, send a message to Beyto and Squid Face.
>>
Alrighty. Writing.
>>
>>30016095
Shax Bonemurder.

Alignment: Evil-Good

Ability: Competent-Incompetent
>>
>>30016209
I snorted.
>>
>>30016141
Deer elf guy, squidfais and blacksmit lady
Hi
The surfac smels funy
How r yu
I am gud
Why ar humans pink?
Luv
SHAX
>>
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Damn, we should have asked for explosives components
>>
>>30016239
>not SHAXXX because three x are more badder than one
>>
>>30016252
More like a stripper name.
>>
>>30016256
We do have quite a pole.
>>
>>30016252
Good point,
Also draw a picture of us raiding using the crayons we got in that last town
>>
>>30016262
>>30016271
>Shaxxx Bonermurder
>>
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>>30016285
God dammit..
>>
>>30016285
Perfect, we're done here...
Oh maybe we should send them that funny leaf we found.
>>
>>30016262
>>30016256
Wait... We are spossed to be a distraction for the main army aren't we?
This sounds like a plan.
>>
Oh! You've definitely got stuff you want to tell people! You write a letter out for Squid Face and tell him all about how the trolls are useful and they both even have names now, and how the sword you're using is super tough now and you can get a little more reckless with it but you wouldn't actually do that because it is important to you. You also ask him how he is doing. After quickly writing this letter, you hand it to the lady. "Give this to Squid Face, I'm sure he is wondering how I'm doing!"

"Who?" The scouting leader asks, turning to look at her subordinates. They shrug. "Does she mean an illithid perhaps?"

"i ain't givin' a letter to them" "do those things even have names" "oh I get it cause they got tentacles on their face" "I'd prefer to not get my brain sucked out"

"We'll, uh, we'll ask around and see if we can't get this letter to... Squid Face," the dark elven woman says with little confidence.

"Oh! Also, I had a really good aide named Beyto. Can he come help me again? I think he would be really useful."

The scouting party looks surprised. "Do you mean Beytolithian Scarmaw? I'm pretty sure he is leading a group of infiltrators in the Valorien theatre. I don't think he'd be able to come help..."

Oh. That is disappointing. "Can you at least tell him that Shax says thanks? I'd write him a letter, but every time I tried to show him my writing he said he'd change the subject. And! You need to thank the duergar lady who taught me how to not die with this sword. Please? She's a blacksmith."
>>
"Okay, yes, certainly," The dark elf woman waves her hands in surrender, "I'll find the exact specific deep dwarven blacksmith who trained you. I promise. Now is there anything you'd actually like from the main army or am I just a courier?"

You put a hand on your chin and think. "I guess I could use some more scouts? I'm always runnin' low."

The scouting leader sighs with relief. "That I can certainly do. I'll have reinforcements back this way in a few days, along with any instructions from the main army. Keep up the good work."

You wave good bye to her and figure that keeping up the good work should be the main priority.

Well, you have a full quest log and a few days to kill. What's the plan, boss?

>Side quests!
>Raiding!
>Being lazy at camp!
>>
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>>30016399
Side Quests! Time for epic loots!
>>
>>30016399
>Side quests!
Raid when reinforcements get here.
>>
>>30016399
Raid the clocktower town. We get to do both a sidequest and a raid with that.
>>
>>30016423
Fair point, supporting
>>
>>30016399
>>Side quests!
w
>>
>>30016399
>>30016433
I'll second this.
>>
>>30016433
I guess that's what was meant by questing?
But yes, I"m for that.
>>
Alright. Writing.
>>
Hmm, well if you're going to get some reinforcements soon, you shouldn't go out raiding too long. Let's check the quest log!

You've got:

>Gnolls to the west
>Abandoned tower to the north
>burnt out stone circle thingy
>kuo-toa way to the east
>dark cults in various towns (may require some light raiding)
>eventually a High Cleric will be escorted to the capital of Manderlay, and you can probably intercept him on the main road (may require a long time)
>Something about a lich in an ancient tomb
>take out Clock Tower Town (gonna take some work)

>Which one do you want to try out?
>>
>>30016562
Dark cults in various towns!
>>
>>30016562
>>Gnolls to the west

Might be able to recruit the little buggers.
>>
>>30016562
>dark cults in various towns (may require some light raiding)
or
>take out Clock Tower Town (gonna take some work)
>>
Not sure what a gnoll is but that word is funny.
Let's do that!
>>
>>30016562
>take out Clock Tower Town (gonna take some work)
>>
>>30016562
>Gnolls to the west

maybe we could get these surface dwellers to help us out, perhaps even the main army.
>>
>>30016562
>>take out Clock Tower Town (gonna take some work)
She said we didn't do enough raiding? Greet her back with a raided town and a mage ally.
>>
>>30016598
Not certain if you're roleplaying as Shax but a Gnoll are Hyena anthromorphs
>>
>>30016562
>take out Clock Tower Town (gonna take some work)
The sooner we get the hard stuff out of the way the better. Things are just going to get harder as we go.
>>
>>30016562
Hmm check out the cults
Borrow elf girls clothes so you don't stick out and go to the nearest town
>>
>>30016562
Hooray! I get to participate today.
>Gnolls to the west
Might be good to bulk up our dudes a little before we hit clock tower town.
>>
>>30016662
We would probably stick out a bit on account of being a goblin.
>>
>>30016562
>Abandoned tower to the north
>>
Alright, writing.
>>
>>30016687
... Wear a cloak...
If anyone asks we aren't a goblin.
I think we know what we are better than those humans do.
>>
>>30016562
>>kuo-toa way to the east
>>Gnolls to the west

I think these two are a good way to bolster our numbers even further.
Gnolls might be persuaded to join us if we trade food perhaps? We got laods of it anyway.
>>
>>30016739

thanks for breaking the tie I didn't know I had when I said writing
>>
>>30016739
Oh shit thats a good point. As a race of hyena people food would probably be a big deal to them.
>>
Waiting for Lion King tier Hyenas
>>
>>30016820

I know that your powers of retention are as wet as a warthog's backside but thick as you are pay attention, my words are a matter of pride.

It's clear from your vacant expressions the lights are not all not on upstairs, but we're talking kings and successions. Even you can't be caught unawares!
>>
>>30016082
>>30016095

We didn't tell her we took out the quarry!
We could have gotten an A! An A!
>>
Gnolls out to the west? You go ask Alloces for more information on this quest thing. She's currently drinking tea with Alfonse. Well, Alfonse is sitting at a small table and she is drinking tea from it. "Hmmm, Gnolls?" She makes an unpleasant face, "Gross hyena people. They worship some sort of crazy hyena god and generally like to make mayhem. The quest was noting and unusual gathering of them. Gnolls aren't particularly dangerous, so my party was going to try and disperse them. Any low or moderate level party of adventurers could head out there and deal with it. Why do you ask?"

"Well, I'm gonna go check them out. If they're kickin' up a fuss we might get noticed quicker. They might even join us?"

"Ugh, please, no. They are uncivilized brutes to the highest degree." You're sitting in a room filled with giant skeleton bones in a camp filled with goblins and having tea with a troll. Alloces shrugs, "But, hey, you're the boss, right?"

You had probably leave some people back to guard the camp in case this takes too long. Milda and Nost are wounded. Who do you want to take with you on the trip out to the gnolls?

>Select your party!
>>
>>30016888
Someone who actually knows what a gnoll looks like.
>>
>>30016888
>>30016909
inb4 they are cultured British gnolls who enjoy a cup of tea after a spot of raiding.
>>
>>30016888
Take the clay golems, and some sneaky guys.
>>
>>30016888

I don't know. But we should take some food with us to bribe them.
Hmm, perhaps some show of power would help too? Lets grab a troll and golems (to pretend that we summoned them so that they think we're a strong elementalist or something).
>>
>>30016888
Admonish Allonces for being so biased. Wasn't she the one upset by the way people usually stereotyped her?
>>
>>30016929
>the golems
You wot m8
You want to take 3 months to get there?
>>30016939
Yeah, take some spare mounts as mules to carry food.
>>
>>30016888
Alloces, Clay Golems, some sneaky gitz.
>>
>>30016956
>You want to take 3 months to get there?

Are they /that/ slow?
>>
>>30016888
The trolls, the sneaky dudes and the elementals? Allonces too probably.
>>
>>30016888

The Trolls, some of the scary guys and No Eyebrows.

> dlyzedla LEADING

YES WE LEADING CAPTCHA
>>
>>30016954

She's not exactly the pinnacle of maturity

I've got an idea of where you guys are goin with this. Writing!
>>
>>30016970
They did take, like, a day or two to get to our camp, a distance we can cover in several hours.

I was exaggerating of course though.
>>
>>30016978
Oh yeah, definitely. Allonces cannot be left alone. Who knows what she will do with our raiding party by the time we come back?
Turn our creepy church into life-sized doll house with the rest of our party dressed up as various Barbie characters
>>
>>30016888
a few sneaky dudes, couple regular dudes, at least one troll, and Alloces because she's the only one who knows what a gnoll looks like. without her, we might end up extending diplomatic relations to some farmers abnormally large dog.
>>
>>30016992
Well neither are we.
>>
You grab a bunch of food. You think if you wanna convince these guys to join you, food will be important. That would be a good way to convince you, after all. "Anyway, Allonces, are you sure you oughta be callin' them all brutes? Aren't you mad that people think you're a wuss just cause you're an elf or whatever?"

She gives you a glare. "Hmph. This is... different." You can tell she has no ground to stand on in this argument. She probably realizes it, too.

"Anyways, you gotta come along since I don't know what a gnoll even looks like." You're pretty sure she might have rolled her eyes. "Also, you're pretty useful! So cheer up, alright?"

"Fiiiine. But only cause you complimented me." How annoying.

You round up the golems, and take them along. Muscle is always nice. In addition you get Gneb, Xab, and Rund to come with you, leaving Kuzr to guard the camp. You ask Mani if he wants to come along since he missed all the action last time, and he readily agrees.

Time to head out!

>Roll d20. Same rules as normal.
>>
Rolled 8

>>30017155
dice
>>
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Rolled 16

>>30017155
Alloces kind of reminds me of pic-related.
>>
Rolled 18

>>30017155
Please notice me, d-dice gods~!
>>
>>30017187

It worked!

Writing.
>>
>>30017187
Well. Looks like they noticed you a little.
>>
>>30017187
ara ara~
>>
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>>30017203
So, QM. Did you draw that picture you usually head the thread with or did you come across it and just decide to make a quest around it?
>>
>>30017239

Someone posted it on QTG and others made a suggestion for a cute quest.
>>
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>>30017254
Ew, /qtg/
>>
>>30017254
bless that anon and the OP for complying.
>>
Rolled 6

>>30017254
I thought Chief posted it himself. I remember the post seemed to be more asking if anyone would be interested and less "wouldn't it be cool if"
>>
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>>30017239

Just came across it and turned it into a quest with zero planning.

I still have no planning, and it has worked out pretty well! I'm having a lot of fun.

>>30017254

That was me as well.
>>
>>30017280

Oh, that's good! I didn't realise that. I thought you were just a good Samaritan.
>>
>>30017280
>Just came across it and turned it into a quest with zero planning.
>I still have no planning, and it has worked out pretty well! I'm having a lot of fun.

Please don't stop running this.
This is like one of the best quests on /tg/ right now
>>
>>30017438
>This is like one of the best quests on /tg/ right now
I'd have to agree.

The nature of the quest fits with the small/moderate playerbase.
>>
You head out into the plains with your group. Allonces seems to be a lot more bearable when traveling, for some reason, maybe cause she has less to complain about. Or maybe she just genuinely likes adventuring.

Even though you were expecting them to be hyper slow, the golems make good time, keeping a brisk pace that isn't too tiring. You don't know where exactly out here you're supposed to go anyway, so it all works out.

The plains stretch on for a huge expanse to the west, and it definitely feels like this area is less developed than the northern section. The few towns and farms your scouts encounter are all pretty small. It seems like a good place for a bunch of people to gather if they really wanted to make a ruckus. So you can sort of congratulate the gnolls on recognizing that. Still, they can't be a huge threat if they are just hiring out adventurers to deal with the gathering instead of a legitimate armed force.

But hey, you're not whoever is in charge of that whacky city. You manage to avoid running into any adventurers, and after about a day of wandering you finally get far enough to where you stop seeing any signs of civilization. Tribal markers start popping up with more regularity. You must be close!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

This is where I wanted to stop last night!

>You recruited a bossy elf, lead several successful raids, and impressed the main army! You get 9 BtB exp! 10/12

>You successfully smashed a caravan and three towns with little casualities and effort! You get 10 MSiF exp! 11/12

>You got a buncha loot, didn't get noticed by anything scary, managed to not die and get lots of food! You get 5 CyRCTHaM exp! 10/6

>You get one CyRCTHaM point! How would you like to spend it?
>>
Voting for Super Sneaky Tech.
>>
>>30017541
I'd like Everything has a weak point
>>
>>30017541
Snapping Turtle Bite
>>
>>30017438

I'll only stop when Shax dies somehow or it reaches a natural conclusion of some kind.

I've got a billion quest ideas that I'm trying to hammer into a concept I want to do afterwards.

>>30017504

I think the readerbase is much larger than the playerbase, as the quest generally snowballs in votes on sup/tg/ after a few days.
>>
>>30017541
Em, how much do the abilities cost?
>>
>>30017541
>super sneaky tech
>>
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>>30017541
For others.
>>
>>30017608
I read it a lot but I'm usually doing stuff when you run.
>>
>>30017541
Everything has a Weakpoint.
>>
>>30017541
Super sneaky

>>30017608
true that
I usually don't get to participate but today is different
>>
>>30017585
We can't get snapping turtle bite! We only have a point for the third skill tree, not the second.
>>30017613
I think that at this point the abilities only cost one point?
>>30017541
I'd like to vote for the eat everything ability please
>>
>>30017652
Doesnt that mean we have enough for everything?
>>
>>30017685
no, you need a certain amount of exp to get a point. see >>30017541
>>
Alrighty. Super Sneaky seems like it wins.

Writing.
>>
>>30017711
Ah yes right sorry.
>>
>>30017729
YOU BETTER BE SORRY
>>
All the sneaking around the plains has taught you the value of being unnoticed. This place is filled with enemies and no one particular wants you to live near them. To be fair, you have wrecked up a lot of homes so far. Maybe you wouldn't want to live near someone like you either? And if you did, you'd have to be sneaky! Being sneaky is important. You started practicing sneaking a lot more, and you are pretty good at it even with your giant sword.

>Ability Unlocked! Super Sneaky Tech - You have a bonus to succeeding all stealth actions from now on!

* If it is nailed down then we just have to steal the nails - You become adept at quickly dismantling security and taking practically everything that can be stolen. You get a bonus to looting! And you spend less time doing so in time sensitive scenarios.

* Why Fight When You Can Poison? - Well, you can sneak. That means you can probably sneak poison in on a tough opponent. You've got a big sword, but that doesn't mean there are guys you can always beat with it. It's best to leave your options open! You become passingly familiar with poisons and can start implementing them in your tactics effectively.

* Back"stab" - With stealth you can wield your sword in critical sneak attacks! They'll never see you coming! You cause a ridiculous amount of damage if you catch an opponent off guard.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Thanks for playing! I'd have run longer, but it was a good stopping point and I got hit with a ton of vertigo outta nowhere. Sorry! I had fun, and you guys are great as always.

Thanks for playing so much! And thank you to you too, archive readers, for reading my stuff and enjoying it.

See you next time!
>>
>>30017830
thx budi
>>
>>30017830
Thanks for the run, Chief. You were great as always too.
>>
>>30017830
Thanks for running.
Now sleep may finally claim me.
>>
I really do want to get back "stab". The image of this little goblin with a fuckhuge sword actually sneaking up on someone is hilarious.

Of course in a full pitched battle flanking does allow you to do that too since enemies will be focused on other things.
>>
>>30017830
thanks, brah
>>
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>>30017830
>They'll never see you coming!


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