previous:http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive.html?tags=Washed%20up%20villain%20questA year has passed Since Dick dastardly escaped from the confines of his "Son's" head. A year has passed since Vilian began a grand game across the multiverse with john fritz, A year had passed since Gunther had put the goddess of justice in his head to spare Astraia Grey. A year has passed since Mecha elvis was voted hottest being in the multiverse. A lot of things can happen in a year. many things, both good and bad. Like mecha Elvis' creator getting kidnapped by space pirates (though the events were made into the highest grossing film the multiverse has ever seen), or Astraia becoming far more hostile than her towering guardian, who appeared to have calmed down ever so slightly. Dick and Jack have been most busy, though if I tell you what they're doing, it will ruin the surprise. Vilian has given Dick a new brother, and Gunther a new uncle. Now which dastardly would you like to control first?Gunther Vilian Dick (not for long as I don't trust any of you)
>>28290654> Dick (not for long as I don't trust any of you)
>>28290747>>28290747I expected this
>>28290654> DickWe get to actually play as him? Oh happy day!
>>28290893not for very long however
>>28290963I have plans with him, that can't be meddled with.
>>28290982...But we have plans for him as well. We never did have that wedding at the train nexus.
>>28291022Justice is still very pissed off at Dick
>>28291046Hence the need to fix things. And considering how terribly he tends to treat her while you're in control...
>>28291087All he did was get basically kidnapped by jack of blades. Of course Justice saw it as him leaving her in her own personal hell as she couldn't hear him
>>28291115Well then he should get on plotting to free her. Plus, I think he'd find it hilarious if Jack thought he was getting the queen of blades when he's actually getting justice.
>>28290982Can't say I'm happy with that, considering I like playing as him the most. Oh well, enjoy it while it lasts and all that.
>>28290893You are Dick Dastardly, one of many third dastardlys, and you are so very bored. This jack fellow seems to prefer to bide his time instead of going out a wrecking havoc with wild abandon, not to mention the minions he gave you are more boring than watching grass grow, you aren't even sure what they are, they look like machine men, and you hate machine men, ever since that steaming summer night in cuba.Other than that slight annoyance, everything is fine, well except for one thing.Your "son", He's out there, defiling the dastardly name, saving people and being a yourself damned hero. I mean if it wasn't for that he'd be the perfect henchman, and you've always wanted to run Bethany and sons train company, but no, the multiverse decided to dick you over."Your move Knight" Jack says sipping on a cup of tea. Oh and you're playing this worlds poor version of chess, you have no idea how it works.What do you do try to lose in one move try to win flip the tableother
Rolled 3>>28291277> otheropen void and blow up world
>>28291277> try to winAlso, mention that you might have an inkling of where the queen might be or at least, where she was. We might want to get her out sometime soon, otherwise she might be angry at us, And an angry Justice-er Queen of blades could be rather painful. Also, we're bored, and romantic kidnapping would be just the ticket. Now what was the hosts name...Astraia? Something like that.
>>28291369...No. Also, don't roll unless called for>>28291388Much better, and more IC. Dick wouldn't deliberately blow up the world.
>>28291388and you just gave me an idea
>>28291388Oh yeah, Jack was The Queen's bitch wasn't he. He probably would not enjoy explaining why he decided to leave her stuck in a hero.
>>28291277>otherDraw a tiny mustache on the king and then move a random piece while grinning like a madman.
>>28291465its a three way tie unless >>28291407counted as a vote
>>28291454I did try to make sure I limited it to what he knew. Also, dick is totally gong to make Astraia his evil understudy, at least until MR Fritz shows up/
>>28291506Well, >>28291465 can be combined with >>28291388I just figured the only way to win a game you don't know jack about is moving random stuff.
>>28291553>don't know jackPun intended?
>>28291572If you haft to axe, it probably is.
>>28291388>>28291465You draw a tiny mustache on what you think is the king and think about throwing the game. Before you realize you are yourself and you've never been one to give up, especially while in cuba. And this world is shitty enough to be the multiverse version of cuba. You move a......thing. Jack's eyes grow wide. He moves a....a...is that a dick? You don't know. You grab what looks like strange mixture of a woman and axe and move it, only for Jack to glare at you until you move it correctly. He moves a....why does he have a statuette of Miss Smiths grandmother? No matter you move a crown shaped tree, or perhaps its some kind of pastyroll 1d100
Rolled 25>>28291631DICE FOR THE DICE MYSELF!
Rolled 57>>28291631>a....a...is that a dickA dick you say?
>>28291674You move it and jack chuckles to himself."It appears I have captured the pie" He says moving what looks like a set of teeth to the piece you just moved. Ok seriously, what kind of mad fucker made this game, I mean the rules just change, and what the hell are the pieces even."Even after all these years you still can't understand the simplest of tactics" Jack says with a laugh as he stands from the chessboard thing in the middle of the very arcane seal thing in the middle of the room. you stare at the chess board, a very familiar anger burning within you.what do you do toss the peice of shit into the nearby chasm Jack, aren't we supposed to be trying to free...the queen, well I think I know where she is Go torment some minions morn the loss of charlie the skeleton, at the hands of your OWN SON other
Rolled 93>>28291766> Jack, aren't we supposed to be trying to free...the queen, well I think I know where she isAdd in "I'd really not prefer to have to deal with her being angry at us for leaving her around.
Rolled 76>>28291766> otherChalenge Jack to a dancefight.
Rolled 97>>28291792Oh wow, thank Villain I rolled after the fact.[X] Jack, aren't we supposed to be trying to free...the queen, well I think I know where she is
>>28291795Lets do this.>>28291808Is the derailing lolrandumb really necessary?
>>28291835Well, he did just mock us and I cannot thing of another way of fighting him right now.Normally I would think of a more serious way of beating him, but I am afraid that we aren't exactly in a position of power right now.We can't let him mock us and walk away with it right? Pretty much everyone that mocked us is dead, maimed or turned into a little girl.
>>28291896We're planning on having him release justice thinking she's an evil world conquering tyrant. That should suffice for our revenge.
>>28291795This is so...boring....so yourself damned boring. You sigh and think. This bloke seems to think you're this knight fellow, who's probably currently trapped in the same void that held you, or dead as disco. you assume it's the same with this Queen. However there is one creature that could possibly fit that role, not to mention it would be most hilarious if it works out. Justice is her name. You smile a wicked smile"Jack aren't we supposed to be trying to free the....queen" You say "well I think I know where she is, and I really don't want to risk her wrath any further". In a moment jack is in front of you again, madness in his eyes."WHERE?!" He shouts "WHERE IS THE QUEEN, AND WHY HAVE YOU WITHHELD THIS KNOWLEDGE FROM ME". You sip your tea."Because you didn't remember my birthday" You say "and I do beilive its called the heroes guild, in the head of one.....oh what was her name, that lumbering oath always called her twig....Australia black....no Astraia Grey, that was it"."Come knight" Jack says with a murderous fire in his eyes "We have some heroes to test"."Wonderful" You say standing up, your vestments swirling around your form like smoke "I'll go get my cane"Gunther or Vilian?
Rolled 75>>28291926Well when she sees us again she might just be a world conquering tyrant.
>>28291926>release justice thinking she's an evil world conquering tyrant.In a sense that wouldn't be wrong. >>28291977>Gunther or Vilian?Gunther.
>>28291986>>28292008Willing to bet he'll still suffer from buyer's remorse.
>>28292008is everyone ok with being gunther?
>>28291977Gunther.This is going to be good.
>>28292207Gunther X Justice is going to be comedy gold.Is it me or is /tg/ a bit unstable right now?
>>28292008You are Gunther Dastardly. And you are currently angrier than you've ever been before. A year ago you might have gone on a murderous spree, and still might.(if you must kill, kill some bandits, they aren't really people)"I'VE KILLED ALL THE BLOODY BANDITS FOR MILES, THEY ARE ALL FUCKING DEAD" You scream.(Really? can't you go to other places, isn't that what heroes in this world do?)"I would, but there is a slight problem" You say "Astraia, she's been acting strange".(Well she isn't exactly right in her head)"Shut up" You say as you walk through the moonlit gardens of the guild "I mean she tried to burn Whisper alive, not that I care, but still"(I thought you were friends with her brother)"I am" You say nodding "he's just a tad...pushy, mainly because he has it in his mind I fancy her"(She is quite beautiful)"She's also an prideful egotistical ass" You say "I mean really, we went on one job together and she tried to hog all the credit, and gold".(A heroes duty is paid in gratitude, not material wealth)"I need gold to by food, which I need to live" You explain looking up at the sky. Oh look a shooting star...wait why is it getting bigger, and what's that horrible noise, sounds vaguely familar. Oh avo its heading right towards you."WHAT THE BALLS IS THAT!" You shout.(that my dear gunther would be a sky bound train)."That's a train, huh I always thought it would be a sword of some kind" You say.(Aren't you to least bit concerned that its heading right for the guild?)"Not realLLAYAYAYAYAY AVO DAMN AVO DAMN" You shout clutching your head "damn you justice, damn you to skorm".(DO something)What do you do ehh fuck it going for a walk roll1d100 to resist the painTry to intimidate the train with your abs roll1d100 PUNCH IT IN THE FACE roll1d100 other
Rolled 18>>28292381> ehh fuck it going for a walk roll1d100 to resist the pain
>>28292381> otherDrink the voice away.
Rolled 92>>28292446forgot my roll
Rolled 18>>28292381[X] ehh fuck it going for a walk roll1d100 to resist the pain. Maybe find a drink along the way.
>>28292459>>28292459Oh god dammit
Rolled 2>>28292489Did I ruin your plan again?
>>28292503No just killed my sadism boner
Rolled 19>>28292510Is it me or did it get lonely in here suddenly? Did /tg/ die?
>>28292486"No...I still don't give a single shit about this avo damned place" You say walking out of the garden and towards the slowly regrowing forest "And besides its not like that thing would kill anyone important".(DO. SOMETHING.NOW)"I....grow...used...to pain" You say gritting your teeth as the feeling of a thousand nails stabbing into your head tries to force you to obey.(Please?)"No" You say clutching you head as a slight chill turns into a near mind shattering cold.(It might hit astraia)"She may not have eyes, but she can still see, somehow" You say before muttering under your breath "Avo damned will users".(I heard that)"I know" you says as you observe a frog hoping along. It really is nice here in this forest you and twig destroyed, so peaceful, so sereneand was that a bloodcurdling scream you just heard.What do you do fuck, some ones getting mugged and I'm not the mugger Dammit greggory stop being a bitch ignore it look at the general direction of the noise other
>>28292597not as far as I can tell
Rolled 88>>28292655 look at the general direction of the noiseAnd get our axe out.>>28292671/tg/ kept shitting out error 10 minutes ago for me.
>>28292707It seems a bit lonely in this quest however
>>28292655[X] Look at the general direction of the noise.
>>28292747Would you rather we talk about ways of being a hero and making massive profit at the expense of the people between voting?
>>28292655> look at the general direction of the noise
>>28292707going with this
Rolled 18>>28292794>making massive profit at the expense of the people Real estate?
>>28292817Or by becoming the greatest threat known to man. A tax collector.
Rolled 15>>28292908Whoa man, even we have standards.Tax collectors are from a kind of evil far stronger than anything from the Villian line.
>>28292809You pull your axe from the axe warmer your mother sent you with a letter no one read to you, so you had astraia burn it, though she set you on fire as well. You turn towards the general direction of the noise and see what can only be described as utter chaos given form. A metal monstrosity lays bent and broken in the ground surrounded by fire and rubble. on top of it stand two men, both are wearing robes, One red and one black. One appears to be giving a speech, another is laughing at the hero he is choking out....and the hero is now a little girl, what?(Oh...oh no)."What?" You ask "besides that fact that man just turned into a little girl"(Remember the old voice in your head?)"the dickish one?" You ask(Yeah that's him)"I though he'd be taller, and bigger" You say "He looks like a doll"(He is well versed in the blackest of arts and is brutal, evil, and charming man)"Sounds like a pansy" You say as you begin to approach the train.(He isn't, not at all, but thankfully you aren't one either)"You know it lass" you say smiling as you ignore a screaming on fire hero. You can hear what they are saying now."Hand over the one called Astraia" The red fellow says with a voice like wine."Bitch you killed my avo damned flowers" Weaver replies "and are you sure you want her, she's the reason half the guild is on fire"."She has something we want, old man" The former voice in your head says as he prods a crying little girl who you recognize as the gardener."Well then its probably ash now, so leave before I unleash a legendary whooping on your asses" the guild master says."Do you think we fear you mortal one?" the red one asks laughing"You better" Weaver says unusually pissed off, dear avo he sounds like a demon "now fix my garden and give me my gardener back"."Are you catholic, oh wait they only like little boys" The black robed one says as he tosses the girl in the air, amused by her terror(stop them)
>>28293035"Hey, Asshole voice, what do you want with Twig?"
>>28293035You stare at this sight as your mind works slowly, they want twig, why you don't know, but no one touches twig but you.(That sounded very crude)Don't care. Not to mention you're the only one allowed to fuck the garden up. AND OH MY LORD THEY HIT THE BOOZE, NOT THE BOOZE, NOW HOW WILL YOU BE ABLE TO HAVE FUN. You grit your teeth in anger(Good to see you have your priorities in line)"Shut up booze is life" You growlwhat do you do OI FUCKEADS THAT'S MY JOB Find thunder, tag team these fuck headsFind maze, he'll know what to do. Find Twigother
>>28293102>Find maze, he'll know what to do.
Rolled 97>>28293102> OI FUCKEADS THAT'S MY JOB
>>28293102[X} OI FUCKEADS THATS MY JOB
Rolled 99>>28293102> OI FUCKEADS THAT'S MY JOB
>>28293208"OI YOU PISS ANT FUCKHEADS" You shout as you smack your axe into your hand "NO ONE FUCKS UP THAT GARDEN BUT ME!". the robbed men turn to you."Wait a second" The black one says "if it isn't Gunther, I though you would've died by now"."You remember his name?" the red one asked."Yeah, kind of hard to with him saying it every time he saw a mirror" the black one said hopping off the train and tossing the gardener away "and I must say I will enjoy this the most of all". In a second he's upon you, hand aimed for your throat. However you have longer arms than he, and you're stronger. Your fist connects with his head with a loud cracking noise accompanied with his head jerking back, followed soon by the rest off him.(Oh thank me, I didn't want to deal with homicidal little girl again). The man laughs on the ground."You know, I was just going to turn you into a little girl as that is never not funny, but now I'm going to rip off your damned legs"."You're welcome to try" You say standing your ground. The red robed fellow shakes his head."Knight, getting beaten by a weakling like this".(knight? Dick what did you do!)"He punches like a train, and I would know" Dick says hopping up, pulling out a length of wood from his robes "now have at you, you filthy savage". He charges you and slides a bit of his stick of revealing a blade. He tries to slash at you, but like most other people, he's unusually short, so you put your hand on his head, stopping him in place."Oh this is hilarious" you say as you watch him slash at you impotently."Choo Choo" He says angrily.(Really dick? Another train?)Of sweet merciful fuck its huge.what do you do dodge roll1d100 Take it like a man roll1d100 use dick as a shield roll1d100 Other
Rolled 67>>28293412> dodge roll1d100Choo Choo motherfuckers
Rolled 47>>28293412punch him through the train
Rolled 20>>28293412>[x] use dick as a shield roll1d100
Rolled 71>>28293412> dodge roll1d100
>>28293585hopefully not high enough.
Rolled 40>>28293412Headbutt the trainIN THE KNOTHOLE GLADE WAY
>>28293448"I'm going to dodge it" you says smiling.(So this is how it ends)."Dear me your stupider than I remember" Dick says laughing. Oh god its so close, ok just need to jump to the left. Why won't your legs move, jump to the left. Roll at least? Don't fuck with me now legs.(are you really threatening your legs?). Yes.(look down). Why.....oh. Black tendrils cover your lower body, holding you in place."This is going to hurt" you say with a nervous laugh."Adios kid, I am glad I never got to know ya" Dick says with a cruel laugh as he melts out of your hands and hops on top of his train. "CHOOOOOOOO CHOOOOOOO YOU IDIOTIC, CRUDE, WHORESON, I would say see you in hell, but I ain't going back there""NO ONE LAUGHS AT ME" You scream as you force your legs to move, breaking the grip of the black things on your legs. That's before you feel a pain unlike any other as you get hit by several tons of metal before getting slammed into a stone wall or three.Damage: ???Dick.....Before you is the steaming wreckage of a train, under which you assume is the corpse of your "son"."Was that really necessary" Jack asks."Yes it was" you say smiling "now lets go save the queen"."Aren't you going to check if its dead?" he asks."I hit him with a me damned train" You say "if he's still alive I'll eat dirt". Jack glares at you,"Fine I trust your judgment" He says hopping off the first train "Now weaver, were is Astraia Grey"."What makes you think I know" The old man says "though if I were to guess I would say burning some poor defencless animal alive.Wait a tick that doesn't sound like justice...not at all.....fuck."Sounds like the queen" Jack says "Knight, deal with this annoyance".What do you doHey want to taste youth again Nother train Try and raise gunther, you want a new zombie Minigun. See what happens when you infuse him with your energy other
Rolled 23>>28293720 See what happens when you infuse him with your energyI am just really curious about the result.
>>28293720Want to taste youth again?
>>28293720>[X] Try and raise gunther, you want a new zombieAnd if gunther is raised we infuse him with our energy to sick him on the guild master.
Rolled 95>>28293720>[x] Try and raise gunther, you want a new zombie
>>28293720> See what happens when you infuse him with your energyThis might be fun.
>>28293792Ah shit i wasted a good roll >.<
>>28293796>>28293792Combine these or wait for a tie breaker?
>>28293825"Lets see what happens when I pump you full of my vile juices" You say placing your hand around his mouth."Gaaaaaaaay" a voice calls out. "Have fun playing with the gardener, who ever said that" You laugh "In fact I jut had a thought, Weaver was it, how would this land fair if all of these heroes turn to little children hmm?"."They're all shit tier" he says "in fact fucking do it, then at least I won't have to keep cleaning up after their avo damned feasts""Guildmaster?" a voice says."You guys can't kill sparrows" Weaver says "really one of the few useful ones is probably dead" ."Stop using the guild master as a puppet you monster" one yells."Funnily enough I haven't done anything yet" You say."Come on, throw yourselves at him" Weaver says "prove me wrong, attack him"."Shut up" you say as your force your magic into him."MMMMMMMMMMMPH" he cries as his eyes turn white as he kicks and flails around as a black and gold substance pours from his nose."Gaaaaaaay" a voice calls out once more, far louder and full of itself than last time"Ok you're going to die" you say "Rise gunther, and feast". Wait a tic, why do you suddenly hear hotblooded music.....is that a....oh dear lord no...its a theme song. And now the train car is flying towards you like a baseball thrown by your mother.roll 1d100
Rolled 3>>28293966Like a baseball? How appropriate, lets use our cane as a bat.
>>28293966Since we're literally a cliched villain we should probably monologue about our brilliant plan about now, though we do need to keep it close to what we told Jack, since he's like five feet from us. On second thought, send him after the girl, then start monologueing
>>28294059Just got here. Do I have any legitimate way to vote for Dick's permanent death? He always bores me.Serious question, I started skimming posts when Gunther went down.
>>28294090You'd almost certainly get outvoted, given that Dick seems to be much more popular that Gunther. Though your suggestion seems to be an excellent way to start a massive shitfest.
>>28294090You do realise that this whole quest started with us controlling Dick right?
>>28294090>Kill DickAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! no.
>>28294090>Dick ever kicking the bucket for good.With his luck I doubt he would ever truely die.
>>28294124Oh, Gunther got ruined last thread. Might have been salvageable today,mbut he'd already moved too far towards boring over the time skip. The problem I have with Dick is his repetitive nature, which was solved by his dying. Then he got reset and now we have a universe with no lasting negative consequence for your decisions or actions. Which simply does not engage me.
>>28294169I personally just want Dick to have a happy wedding with his semi willing bride, then we can start over with a new villain. I'm thinking Overlord, that's tailor made for villainous shenanigans.
>>28294130I do. I didn't bother participating much before he tore open a gaping maw and nearly let it composure the world. Now that he's back I'm sorry that I voted for him to say it with justice instead of staying in character and sacrificing all of our rival gods, one by one, to our ego via the void before Dick himself was consumed. Would have had him start part two alone, which is a less interesting and less promising premise to me. Thus I would be less disappointed by his current resurrection.
>>28294211We get married and then kill her so we can continue our villainous ways without her nagging.
>>28294228The star crossed romance with justice is what I'm in this thread for. I was disappointed by the introduction of Gunther at all. Also, there are other consequences than death.
>>28294257Or we mold her to our evil ways.
Rolled 26>>28294211Or Dio from Jojo bizarre adventure.Perhaps even Dagoth Ur from morrowind.Or even...Garland from FF1.
>>28294020You move slightly to the left, hearing a great splash and feeling a cold wave of water crash into you. Before you is a still living Gunther, without his shirt.....why does he have a wolf man on his chest, its so classless. He stares at you, broken axe still in hand. Jack looks at you with disappointment in his eyes."This is why you always double tap, Knight" he says."Why aren't you dead?" you ask as you continue to pump magic into Weaver "Well anyways I think you deserve to hear this". Jack looks at you confused."FOR YOU SEE WE ARE THE KNIGHT AND JACK OF BLADES" You shout stretching yours arms out from each other "THE TRUE RULERS OF THIS WORLD, PAST, PRESENT, AND FUTURE". Gunther takes and unsteady step forward."and you see your little friend Astraia has something we want, namely the queen of blades, who is far mightier than either of us" You yell, holding back vomit at the thought of being below another being "all we ask is you hand her over so that we may more effectively rule you savages, hell I might even spare you if you do". Then you see his eyes and know that he truly is your child, such cold fury, such fire."Juuuuustice" he groans in a unaccented voice "justice shall be served". Wait that doesn't sound right at all, he should be threatening to rip you limb from limbGunther Status: Berserk"Well....I decided what justice is" You yell "NOT MORTALS LIKE YOU, ONLY A GOD CAN DECIDE WHAT TRUE JUSTICE IS"."I AHM A GAD OF FURREH AN HATE" He shouts with his usual hard to understand accent."Knight deal with him" Jack says walking off "I'll find the queen, I hope you luck, for if I find you defeated, I will show no mercy". You hate him, oh how you hate him, but you need himGunther is charging at you with fire in his eyes.What do you do Train roll1d100 Show him the might of a minigun roll1d100 Cane battle roll1d100 ehh the usual punishment should work roll1d100 Bah, Let me show you the power of a real god roll1d100  other
>>28294261What persistent consequences are left aside from the setting change? At this point Dick can theoretically go home, might take some work, but not too much. Seriously, his character is resistant to change, evolution, growth or corruption given his nature. What consequences?
>>28294295I hope you luckI didn't realize how strange that sounded until after I posted it
Rolled 70>>28294295>Bah, let me show you the power of a god!Trainmagedon 2.0!
>>28294301Well most of his useful minions are dead, Fritz and Missy seem to have gone rogue, Viviane is free and stronger after 20 years of freedom. The cottage has new master. Also you kind of fucked that world hard.
Rolled 35>>28294295> otherGet high in the sky, then rain down minigun death"I really can't wait for him to find the 'queen of blades' fellow is in for quite the surprise. Justice is not quite what he's expecting."
Rolled 21>>28294295> ehh the usual punishment should work roll1d100Lets turn this joke into a farce.
Rolled 67>>28294295>[x] Bah, Let me show you the power of a real god roll1d100
Rolled 51>>28294295>Cane Battle Royale Roll!Cane everyone to kingdom come!
>>28294295>otherWe've wasted enough time on him. Tear a hole in reality and throw him into the void!
>>28294327we are not deliberately destroying the world again.
Rolled 78>>28294295> Cane battle
Rolled 60>>28294337>Also you kind of fucked that world hard.Then we can rebuild it as the central trainstation of the multiverse and build a network of planeshifting trains!
Rolled 79>>28294360Whoops, dropped a letter in the roll call.
>>28294360>>28294377I don't care how high your roll is no throwing him into the void.
>>28294372Not to mention the only remaining evil god there is the unknowing terror.
Rolled 64>>28294295His girl likes fire? I like FIRE. BURN HIM TO ASH!
>>28294364>>28294364Tie between cane battle and going full fuck you I'm a god mode
>>28294390Sounds like he/she/it/whatever's feeling lonely and could use a new master. And Dick coul use and adorable pet!
>>28294416It is quite powerful. So very powerful as you sowed a good deal of terror before you left.
Rolled 100>>28294410>God ModeErase him so we can move on.Rolling for Gunther to make a deal with the devil. One god of Justice to become a true god of rage.
>>28294410Lets go with fuck you I'm a god. Along with doing the whole evil gloating about how fucked Jack is. We've been saving that for a WHOLE YEAR.
Rolled 8>>28294410so a godly cane whoppin?
>>28294444>Rolling for Gunther to make a deal with the devil. One god of Justice to become a true god of rage.Naaana Nananana naaa GOODBYE JUSTICE
>>28294444...we aren't controlling Gunther right now. You can't just roll for whatever random thing you want.
>>28294444HahahahhahaAnd you fucks (I mean fine fellows really, but drunk on success right now) said I couldn't give Gunther a chance! Ahahahahahahahahaha!
>>28294470Your seriously going to let him roll for Gunther even though we aren't controlling him?
>>28294470Which is somewhat too bad since I (>>28294477) actually do like Justice quite a bit, but I dislike Dick far more. Happy to screw him over.
>>28294492Maybe, all I know as that roll is connect to Gunther boy he ain't dead let
>>28294444confirmed for awesome
>>28294444No, that is not happening. I vote against that.>>28294470what he said >>28294492 especially since people don't want this to happen.
>>28294511Fine, Justice is still kicking, but so is Gunther.
>>28294511I dunno, I think I want this to happen. Think of it, eventually the entire family is a totally dysfunctional pantheon. This is just the first (second) step to that.
>>28294492Don't you understand Anon? We are all the Dastardlys! All of them, all the time! What's limited is only the momentary point of view. Which is why, if I so chose, I could also be rolling for Astraia. She's Dick's daughter after all.
>>28294539I'll hold a vote on the next post then
>>28294528Fine by me. Letting people deliberately try to fuck people over will lead hell.
>>28294539Letting him kill off justice though? With a single roll?
>>28294572That isn't called for? Terrible precedent.
>>28294572We excised a head voice with a single roll. Gunther already has Albion's devil's ear, and the devil wants Justice so. All he has to do is offer the deal and it's done. That's the beauty of my plan.
>>28294572>>28294604And think of it this way, both of you. Justice won't really be 'dead' in the strictest sense, oh no. He'll get to chill with Albion's Devil for a bit, maybe chat about the state of affairs and whatnot, and then get free eventually. You can't keep a good villain down and whatnot
>>28294604Yeah, but you're deliberately and inalienably fucking over a significant portion of the audience who have only expressed desire to wrap up a plotline so we can move on.
>>28294444"Fuck you" you say as you lash out with far more power than should kill this little shit. "NO FUCK YOU" He screams charging at you. well you didn't expect him to move."Just stand still" You say as he somehow dodges each bolt of vile energy "I am really rusty at hitting a moving target". You grow impatient, and throw the guildmaster at him. You miss, again. "Really?" You ask "Fine, no more being fair".Wait a second, you can smell something on the air. two scents, two godly scents."Well this is interesting" You say observing the madly screaming Gunther as you try to distinguish the smells from the smothering scent of burning flesh what do you smell, choose two The hungering rage, or at least something similar to it justice a scent not unlike yours,, except on fire A Horribly clean scent oatmeal cookies? Granny SMITH!!!
>>28294640...you think I'm not trying to wrap up a plotline?
>>28294664> justice> a scent not unlike yours,, except on fire
Rolled 59>>28294664> justice> a scent not unlike yours,, except on fire
>>28294664>[x] oatmeal cookies? Granny SMITH!!!>[x] A Horribly clean scent
>>28294664>[X] a scent not unlike yours, except on fire!Heeeeello Astraia! Father-daughter bonding/murder moment time!
>>28294674I thought you were trying to wreck the romantic sublot which is the only reason about half of the playerbase is hanging around.>>28294664> justice> a scent not unlike yours,, except on fire
>>28294444Looks like god mode got a 100.Why am I not suprised?
>>28294664>Hungering Rage>Me on Fire!
>>28294640Dont see why justice having a tragic ending isnt wrapping up a plotline.
>>28294712Besides If Skorm did take justice Its not like I wouldn't put the option for dick to kill Albion's devil.
>>28294707Oh, and Justice. I wanna see her beat the shit o' her dead beat baby' daddy?
>>28294734WAIT, SKORM IS A THING?
>>28294734So none of these character will ever really die. Wow. I'm starting to feel really manic and destructive. This will be fun.
>>28294776Yes. But since I don't play fable I forgot that damn name when I rolled. What devil did you think I was sacrificing Justice to?
>>28294803Wasn't sure honestly, since Skorm was supposedly made up.
>>28294777If you roll low enough they will die, if you roll high enough they won't
>>28294664[X] Justice[X] A scent not unlike yours...except on fireOh boy, I can tell Dick is going to like Astraia.
>>28294803In retrospect I think it would have been better if I'd rolled for Gunther to forcibly take Justice's mantle of godhood for himself. I guess making her a mortal voice in a god's mind would have been more palatable to some of the audience.
>>28294858Basically, you're sabotaging other members enjoyment and expressed objectives. That way lies repetitive shitstorms. Our audience needs to live and let live or this will become decidedly unfun very quickly.
>>28294843We and always bring them back and play with them later though, so that doesn't really matter. Brief filler arcs are a punishment, sure, but not enough to restrain me from doing cool things just because they'll probably get someone "killed".
>>28294895Basically I'm criticizing my lack of consideration for the other player's narrative sensibilities. Still going to roll for whatever I think the Dastardlys should do in character.Pretty soon I'm going to start rolling for the foppish space pirate to make reality fall. Explosively!
>>28294725"Justice" You mummer looking at the howling Gunther "You tricky little thing you". You laugh, reality itself voices its protest at the non native divinity in this realm."Ain't that a laugh" You say calmly approaching the mad Gunther "Now how about you jump out of that idiots head, I swear I'll be good". Ok that was a good punch son, But I must break you. You try to force your divinty into Gunther, Only to feel a familar sickening sensation, Pure neutrality."ARE YOU REALLY PROTECTING THIS SAD EXCUSE FOR A PERSON?" You ask "Oh I do love that bleeding heart of yours, I really really do, but would prefer it to be as black as the void". You hear screaming in the distance."UNHAND ME YOU PEASANTS" A feminine voice roars in rage. You turn to see a young woman about as tall as you, Bandages covering her eyes and fire covering everything else.She appears to be destroying the guild, good on her. You sniff the air, tasting the magics. Gunther, the only magic in him is a bit of yours you left behind and that of justice protecting him from you corrupting influence, and the doom he should have felt when you hit him with a you damned train. Then there's that girl, and this confuses you, you can see her filled with magic, like you, and she is quite angry at people messing up her dress, like you.You stare at your son. He is so very unlike you, so disgusting and crude and to the girl surrounded by flames.You smile. but then you notice Jack approaching her from behindWhat do you do Kidnap the maiden (Astraia) stop jack "save" justice, let these lesser beings deal with jack other
>>28294896Depends on which universe they die in
>>28295011>Stop JackWe might as well kill him first.
Rolled 58>>28295037Oh, right. Rolling!
>>28295011>[X] Kidnap the maiden (Astraia)We don't need a son when we adopt a daughter.
>>28295011>Better stop Jack before he picks the wrong Queen!Death to the Blades!
>>28295011>[x] "save" justice, let these lesser beings deal with jack
Rolled 28>>28295011> Kidnap the maiden (Astraia)MWAHAHAHAHAHAThat lovely little thing shall be our daughter, she is so much like us.
>>28295011> stop jack"Ugh, fine. Since I found you I suppose I don't need to trick Jack into freeing you so the pair of us can kill him after all. We can beat him up, then force him to free you. How did you end up in this idiot anyway?"
>>28295074She's already his daughter. Just like Gunther is Justice's son. Where did you think little godlings came from?
>>28295074Wait....Why not Kidnap Astraia and then kill Jack when he thinks we are on his side helping him out.
>>28295011> stop jack
>>28295110I don't see why not.
Rolled 53>>28295011> Kidnap the maiden (Astraia)In all seriousness, I think she was in fact Dick's daughter the whole time, but she and Gunther got mixed up at Void Hospital so that's why everything is backwards>>28295110Yessss. I like this too
>>28295110lets turn him into a little girl. It's never not funny.
>>28295110If we manage to make it everyone vs jack he'll go down right quick.>>28295097This plus "...Okay, I'll undo the girlification, just this once."
Rolled 21>>28295011>otherrolling for Justice to empower Gunther further to save Astraia by blocking the Jack's blade with Dicks body.
>>28295170What girlification? the gardener?
>>28295172...Are you trying to kill of Dick. Also, seriously stop rolling for people we don't control. This is going to lead to a level of backstabbing that make the Skaven look loyal.
>>28295110Can't argue with that. Sounds good to me.
>>28295199Yeah. We really don't have any reason to fight Justice right now. Plus, we've been saving up our rage for an entire year.
>>28295203...yes? I want Dick's plotline wrapped up as quickly and satisfyingly as possible.
>>28295222>saving up rageWhat are you talking about? We were finally free of that imbecile! It was amazing until that bastard made us play chess with human hour ago...
>>28295229lolno, Dick is here for the long game.
>>28295272Hahhahaha. Good one!
>>28295229And in the process you'll piss off a significant portion of the posters by killing off the arguably most popular character in a fundamentally undemocratic fashion. If OP were to allow such things things would be horribly abused by trolls.
>>28295286>>28295229..wait didn't the guy who did this the first time say he wasn't going to do this anymore?
>>28295333No, that was another guy. I was sad to see him go.
>>28295229>>28295286I do hope you realize what a terrible precedent it would be to kill off a main character with a single uncalled for roll. This story is unstable enough as is.
>>28294640And now you see why MT is such a shithouse QMEqual parts lolrandumb and letting a single roll change large parts of the story
>>28295037"Well I don't need that annoyance anymore" You say to the now passed out Gunther and Justice "But I could trick him, don't worry dear I'll get you out of that idiot, eventually, I swear". You calmly walk over to the Interesting girl.Astraia .....Buuuuurn it all, this place has to burn, its so dirty and uncultured, not to mention its the only thing stooping you from burning more things. You look across the carnage, seeing through you might of will alone, you'll get that bitch back, you'll tear out her eyes, if she even has eyes....not all if was caused by you, someone is trying to steal YOUR VICTORY. You glare at the black robed man as sense something familar about him, no matter, You wanted to bring Gunther low, wipe that stupid smile of his face, MAKE HIM STOP CALLING YOU TWIG, but now he's lying on the ground bleeding. If he's dead you'll burn something, well you'll burn something anyway, but still, you'll burn more things, make this boring world exciting, and far more cleanGuntherYou moan as you struggle to move anything."What happened?" You ask through blindly pain(You got hit by a train, just stay down)"Oi he's going for twig, have to stop him" You say as you force you arms to push you up(STAY DOWN). You clench your teeth as you feel a burning fire course through your veins(If you move you die, for once in your life listen)"If twig gets hurt..." You begin the voice of justice interrupts you (Why do you care for her, she sets you on fire, and has been most cruel despite you freeing her of me)."Because she's my friend" you say smiling(You foolish boy)Dick dastardlyThe garden around you erupts into flames, quite impressive. Jack is still creeping up on the girl. Oh he was until she notices him despite being blindfolded. He could easily kill her and let he doesn't, probably because he's afraid He'll hurt the "Queen" the fool. A simple magical trick later and you are behind her.She doesn't notice you creep out of her shadow.(cont)
>>28295392It would take several high rolls to kill of an important character
>>28295392Ok. Point 1, T. Mustache already said he wasn't killing off a character with a single roll (dashing my hopes to quickly move on from this storyline) and we had a vote to validate that. Point 2, this in an intentionally chaotic and unstable story, that's Parton it's charm. Point 3, I find it amusing that you keep running to the Questgiver with you're complaints rather than trying to fashion anything approaching a plan to make Dick interesting beyond "Dick does what he needs to do to get the girl, fuck over the world and runaway into the sunset allowing us to do something else." if the plan's to move to another character after this anyway then why not let the old protagonist go out with a BANG! A bloody one.Hell, I was mostly suggesting fucking over justice to give him a worthy, challenging opponent in the short (maybe long) term and to give him something to do (reclaim Justice from the devil) once this is done. The character's a freaking god for crying out loud, he needs challenges appropriate to that scale.
Rolled 43>>28295460I am still waiting on Molyneux to show up and freak about what we did to his setting.Wouldn't it be right now the worst moment for Fritz or Dastardly to show up?
Okay, adopting my other name for a moment.Let's try to keep discussion away from trying to sabotage different characters unless it pertains to Dick or someone planning to sabotage them.Also, remember to not feed the trolls.This is the Captain with your public service anouncement and back to our previously scheduled program.
>>28295504>worst momentNot really. We have shit tight in hand.
>>28295439She does notice your arm around her neck however."Let go of me" She spits like a wild animal "I might spare you if you do". So very like you."Ah Knight" Jack says "I assume you dealt with the hero". You nod, thinking about the best way to deal with this annoyance."Now hand her over" he demands. You shake your head,"Knight do not dissobey me" He says angrily "Give me the queen"What do you say sorry jack, the names dick, dick dastardly, and you'll soon learn to never tell me what to do Hey little miss, set him on fire Ok choo choo Oh how I hate You jack, and that ugly mask of yours, lets see what happens when I break it write in
Rolled 92>>28295507Its almost starting to feel like the AoPH thread from tuesday.Ah, the debating, the trolling, the crying...
>>28295504It will probably happen soon.
Rolled 68>>28295542> Choo Choo!
Rolled 28>>28295542> Hey little miss, set him on fireA fun activity for the whole family!
>>28295544That was a fun thread
>>28295563Do we still have the one per thread train limit?
>>28295542>CHOO CHOO MOTHERFUCKERJust wanted to say that. Not my real choice, rather> Oh how I hate You jack, and that ugly mask of yours, lets see what happens when I break it
Rolled 44>>28295542[X] Hey little miss, set him on fire
>>28295542[X] Oh how I hate You jack, and that ugly mask of yours, lets see what happens when I break it and ask the little miss to set him on fire.>>28295544Oh god that entire one vote.Thank god he created an entire thread just for that one vote.
Rolled 56>>28295586There was more than one, which makes it all the more hilarious.Really, we had a separate thread with over 500 replies just for the shitstorm. Haha.
>>28295542Oh jackYou didn't really think I was your underling did you?Hey little Missy, want to see what happens when a flaming train impacts a pompous ass? It combines things we both love
>>28295592When you control dick yes, otherwise he can just keep throwing them as I assume he'd roll high enough to not tear a hole in reality, again
Rolled 76>>28295542>Burninate!Seriously, fuck Jack!
>>28295586>>28295621It's even better when you consider we ended up with both anyway.
Rolled 6>>28295542"blind eh? I might be able to do something about that little Missy, I just need you to do one thing for me. Burn the idiot. He's outlived his usefulness."
>>28295630>not tear hole in reality, againI cannot express my current level of disappointment. You wound me OP, you wound me to my soul.
>>28295670one guy actually voted for the train remember.
Rolled 87The more I think about it, the more I want Jack to be turned into a little girl and renamed the miss of blade.
>>28295700>>28295700You can still do that, I mean being set on fire isn't instantly lethal
Rolled 2>>28295700Maybe we should turn him into a little kittengirl instead, just to freshen up the joke?
Rolled 31>>28295735A kittengirl is fine too.
>>28295764Can we set it on fire and watch it run nyahing in fear and pain while we get blindy to make us popcorn?
>>28295661So we'd turn her into a little girl, just it would happen to be her, with eyes? Sounds cool. Might want to use test subjects first though.
>>28295661"Hey little missy" you say with a voice like butter "Burn this idiot, he's far since outlive any usefullness"."KNIGHT" He shouts drawing that sword he is so fond of "I will strike you down again"."Oh jack did I ever tell you how much I hate you and your horrendous mask?" You ask "Not to mention you never remember my name"."what are you talking about" he asks now ablaze, before staring at you "You aren't knight""DING DING DING WE HAVE A WINNER" You shout."Who are you?" he askswhat do you say a god Dick Vilian Bethany Dastardly the third this girl's father A thing not of this world, neither is the girl, the overgrown manchild on the ground over there, or the thing I was hoping to trick you into believing was the queen in his head. your doom other
Rolled 19>>28295796> otherA gentleman
>>28295499this guy gets it
Rolled 26>>28295839oops, wrong post quoted. Meant to quote>>28295808
>>28295808[X] A God....and this girls father. *Insert smiting him with our supreme power*
>>28295808> A thing not of this world, neither is the girl, the overgrown manchild on the ground over there, or the thing I was hoping to trick you into believing was the queen in his head.
Rolled 75>>28295808All of the above! Seriously weave that into a goddamn monologue! Ze Dick deserves one.
>>28295883I'm so glad you guys chose all the name options in the first thread
>>28295883Yeah, we actually sorta completed a plan without everything going to hell.
>>28295860Wait even better" Your Doom, for I am a god not of this world and this lovely fire is my daughter....and that overgrown manchild is unfortunately my son.
>>28295883Seconding>>28295901And you fucking jinxed it
>>28295941Nah, the original plan completely failed. Mind you it could never have succeeded because it was based on false assumptions.
>>28295883Now that also works.
>>28295935"And that voice in my sons head would be my woman is she ever stopped worrying and let me tie her to my train tracks, if you know what I mean?"
>>28295883You think what to say to to the confused creature. He may strike out against you at any moment, not like it would hurt you, but your dear daughter seems a bit...flimsy."A... god, called Dick Vilian Bethany Dastardly the third" You begin"Wait a second" The girl shouts angrily "You're related to Gunther?!"."Unfortunately" You say "I am also related to you my dear daughter, and I was not born of this world, you may have had a mother who birthed you, but she was never truly yours, so yes you are related to that manchild bleeding on the ground over there". She doesn't say a word, probably shocked at this revelation. JAck swings his blade at you, catching it on your skull, now this would have killed you once upon a time, but you're a god."What are you" he repeats."Your doom" You say with a smile.What do you do Put him on a train See if whatever he is can be turned into a little girl....with cat ears, yeah that should make a good present for your daughter make him swish cheese Choppy choppy other
Rolled 10>>28296070> See if whatever he is can be turned into a little girl....with cat ears, yeah that should make a good present for your daughterThat would be cute.
>>28296070> See if whatever he is can be turned into a little girl....with cat ears, yeah that should make a good present for your daughterare we supposed to roll?
>>28296070Hey Jackie, have you ever wondered how you would look as a little catgirl?
>>28296102Nah, Jack ain't Shit to the Double D
Rolled 63>>28296138hmmmmmCorrection, turn him into a little catgirl with double D
>>28296138Not as he is now anyway. I imagine if he had his heart and sword we'd have to try quite hard.
>>28296070[X]  See if whatever he is can be turned into a little girl....with cat ears, yeah that should make a good present for your daughter
>>28296070>lobotomized kittengirl pet thingDistract the kids so we can give Justice the D she's been waiting for for so very long! Give her the Dastardly that stole her heart.
>>28296157Jack at full power is basically a god. This guy is but a shadow.
>>28296221least we aren't dealing with Lucien Fairfax, that guy was the wimpiest of the Fable villains. Even Fable Journeys had better enemies.
>>28296172Hmmmm, you know, you really like this joke, never gets old. You think as your fingers pierce Jack's neck. Really its comedy gold. You blind daughter seems to stare at the thrashing demi god? creature of the void? dumbass? You really never cared enough to ask. However as he begins to shrink, you realize, this is actually getting bland. You recall some strange cartoon your old henchmen watched when not staying away from your corpse, oh how you miss that corpse. What were you thinking about again, ah yes girls that were part cat, really cute, but sadly not real, but you could make them real, you are god after all.You watch as the pitiful creature in your hands shutters and gasps as you rewrite everything about it. You briefly remember fluffy as the ears and taill appear in bursts of blood and sinew.you really need to find your dog you think as familiar barking fills your ear, ah there it is.You look at the thing in your hands, i..she blinks and stares at you with confused eyes, oh dear it appears you fried what ever jack was.the mask however refuse to leave its face, you need a hammer or something."Happy birthday" You say releasing your daughter and cat jack."t..thanks" she says looking at it with despite being blindWhat do you do Family reunion (remove justice from Gunther) talk with one of your children other
>>28296292Fucker shot my dog
>>28296338> Family reunion (remove justice from Gunther)Time for a family reunion and possibly a vacation at planar cuba.
>>28296338> Family reunion (remove justice from Gunther)
>>28296371We'd need a chest to pack all of our traveling items in.
>>28296338[X] Family reunion (remove justice from Gunther)
>>28296338> Family reunion (remove justice from Gunther)>>28296435Will the Chest be our son's super best friend?
>>28296338>Family reunion>talk with the misses>kiss in the hopes that the neutral explosion with annihilate this reality and stop her nagging>discover that opposites don't cause that reaction in this reality>shrug and enjoy make out sess->why are we on the ground?>oh shit, Justice is screaming at us while holding us down and gut punching us, while grinding against us>oh well, the kids'll have to just get used to their new siblings...
>>28296593Sorry this got a bit butchered, lost the original draft to a browser crash...
>>28296593Clearly Gunther ends up with Justice and Dick gets to take his daughter on a wild reality hopping ride.
>>28296338Our dirty Mexican henchmen were weeaboos as well?
>>28296473You decided to remove Justice from the head of the idiot. You walk up the uncounsiouc form of yoAAAAH IT MOVED."Ow ya argh a dick" He groans "did ya realeh hath ta kick me"."Yes" You say "Now lets get the goddess out of your head"."What did ya say" He muttered "Jess leave me be, ya hath fucked me day up enough already".You ignore him and place your hand on his head, grabbing the other being with in. the golden burning beauty of justice slowly rises and...did she just slap you."Aharharharharhar" Gunther laughs."Hello dear" you say. She glares at you."Oh come on"."twenty years" She says "nineteen in little miss pyromaniac, the last one was actually easier as he didn't want to kill something ever five seconds""Dinnae insult me!" Gunther shouts angrily."I find that hard to believe honestly" You say "I mean I tried so hard to make him a violent monster".*whasmack*"Ok that one actually hurt" You say."What made you like this?" she asks."It was my mother" You answer "a vile woman really"."And so you treat your son badly because of that?" she asks"He's an idiot" You answer ""He finds more joy in being a barbaric drunkard than causing terror""Dat mah bee because drinken is fun" He shouts."He's a sweet boy" justice says."Very undastardly" You say.She glares at youwhat do you do kiss kick gunther again tell her she is currently stepping on her darling boys face play with fluffy
>>28296640everything is weeaboos
>>28296710> tell her she is currently stepping on her darling boys facethen> kiss
>>28296710KissThen play with fluffyDo not mention that she is standing on Gunther's face and actually doing a decent job of not garbling his speech any more than necessary
>>28296710> tell her she is currently stepping on her darling boys face"I was trapped as well you know its not like I meant to keep you trapped in there. Plus, my plan to get you out worked, despite the fact that you moved bodies."then> kiss
>>28296710[X] Kiss her, kick gunther while doing so, tell her she is standing on our "darling" boys face, and play with our dam dog because holy hell we have missed his cute little face.
>>28296748this has my vote
>>28296710Tell her she is stepping on that darling boys face by mentioning how impressive his ability to speak and indeed maintain consciousness while a goddess is standing on his head, dear me that is an incredibly thick skull he got
>>28296710>"...So we agree that he takes after you and Astraia takes after me." Smile "Still, twenty miserable years for the both of us seems like a light price to pay considering I actually get to ask this.) Drop to one knee, "Dearest Justice, the only good thing to have ever found its way into my heart, would you consent to let me tie you to my train tracks? Or, if it's too soon for that, share my company for an eternity or two or until I inevitably end up driving you away with my insanity (really not going to blame you if that happens)?"Prepare to get punched in the face.
>>28296821That is so very dick it makes me cry
>>28296821This gets the Captain's vote.
>>28296748"You are currently stepping on your "darling boys" face" you say "Quite impressive having a god step on his head isn't even effecting his ability to speak, I think, its hard to tell with him."Sorry Gunther" she says stepping off."eh its alright" He says "I've had worse""Now dick" she says "I am sorry but your deeds can't go unpunisMMMMPH". You still got it despite "dying" twice. She stares at you, blushing as red as the blood covering Guntherwhat do you do Kick gunther again nother kiss You don't like the way your daughter is touching the cat FLUFFY OH HOW I HAVE MISSED YOU other
>>28296957> nother kissthat will shut her up
>>28296957I do like the way our daughter is touching the cat I am just unsure entirely how she is managing itAh kiss justice again anyway
>>28296957>hat do you do> FLUFFY OH HOW I HAVE MISSED YOU
>>28296957[X] FLUFFY OH HOW I HAVE MISSED YOUAsk Justice if she could heal Gunthur before she bleeds out or something and go see our daughter.Fluffy meets his new playmate....The Jack of Cats.
>>28296957>"Astraia, take care of your brother for a bit. Please."Engage full make out mode with Justice.
>>28296957> otherFamily field trip to a Bizarre world! Train travel time!
>>28297051A bizzare woooooorld you say?
>>28297051Won't it feel weird to be inside the train for once?
>>28296957> nother kiss
>>28297024>>28297024Why go there when our work is not done yet? Does not a train need a train station?!?
>>28297072What are you talking about? We ride on top of the train either straddling the locomotive or on the fenced in roof do a car where we will dine will style. Well, except for Gunther, maybe /his mother/ can get the boy to finally use his manners (this is where we discover that Justice eats like an oaf).
>>28297127We are the train station. That's what it means to be the god of trains (among other things).
>>28297127If its a summoned reality transferring train? No, it goes where it wants or where we tell it to. Fuck the paying passengers.
>>28296957We all come together as one big dysfunctional family that travels the multi-verse gaining power and turning all our enemies into little girls and gore.
>>28297245Will "little gore-girls" become a thing a wonder?
>>28297201>>28297226Wait....You know what I just thought of? What....if we set up a train station here and everywhere we visit so when we have enough stations on enough world we create a spell to connect them all with a Grand Central station...thats located right in the middle of the void.
>>28297297Ok, look. I o longer support the trail station idea because it's not a wasted action likely to get Dick killed at this juncture, so could you please stop rubbing that failed ploy in my face?
>>28297297You want Justice know that she will always play second fiddle to our toy train obsession? This ought to be good...
>>28297095You kiss justice again."Can ya at lest git me a beer or somthin" Gunther asks "I am currently in a gret deal oh pain". You know you'd expect justice to b ea great deal angrier than she is. She pushes you off."Ahhh" You say "I was hoping I could sire another disappointment"."What the fuck have you done" a balding man screams "My creation!!!!""I am sorry" Justice says running over to the man."LEAVE" He shouts "I have to rebuild it from the ground up, just leave"."That's actually pretty funny" You say in sync gunther "... don't think that makes me like you""Stop squirming kitty" Your daughter coos as she force former jack into a dress as Fluffy runs around the frozen statues that called themselves people "Well this place is boring anyway" You say "Lets see whatelse is out there, Astraia, Justice, Fluffy"."OI!" Gunther shouts."Annoyance" you add"Dats bettah" he says"Lets see what other worlds are out there.An hour laterVilian Dastardly......"Come on Monty" you say to your friend "Dick isn't here"."DAMMIT" Fritz says kicking a frozen old man, causing him to glitch out "We just missed him".*clack clitter groan moan wheeze*"Yeah monty, it does appear this world is rather fucked beyond belief" You say "So where is he" the paladin asks."Fuck If I know" you answer."Dammit" Missy says."Daddy?" A man that looks like Fritz says"Fuck" Mr Fritz says "I knew albion sounded familar"Meanwhile in the voidbefore you are portals to new and exciting worldswhich do you choose that place looks rather depressing (dark souls) It....calls to me (Jojo's bizzare adventure)What are those little beast (POKEMON) Ah it looks like home (World of DARKNESS) other (choose)
>>28297349>>28297349Also any ideas for a description?
>>28297349>PokemonBecause legalized dogfighting with Fluffy is just too funny to pass up.>>28297410Description of?
>>28297349>[X] It....calls to me (Jojo's bizzare adventure)
>>28297349 It....calls to me (Jojo's bizzare adventure)
>>28297349>JoJoIt calls to me. Ahhahahahahahaha!
>>28297349This place looks rather depressing, maybe some trains would liven the place up
>>28297513Dick is just Doctor BEES, but with trains
>>28297513Nah, there smoke would finish the job of blotting out the sun I think>not a vote.
>>28297512"That place" You say "it calls to me""Oi twig that's cheatin" gunther yells."You don't even know how to play chess" Astraia replies."Bah Chess is a pansy's sport" Gunther says."How are you even walking?" You ask "(I hit you with a train""I'm a tough bastard" He says eating a bowl of gruel while justice tears into a chicken leg."Bah" you say, how could one so beautiful be such a messy eater.the train hits to portal with a loud thud.A few hours laterYou awaken, still in the train, but the air is different, very differentWho are youDick Gunther Astraia Justice
>>28297349>Pokemon legalized cock fights is go
>>28297349> other (choose)oh, what about the setting of exalted? The next in line could be an infernal exalted.Or heck, why not an old school fantasy dnd world?
>>28297478>up>>28297478You got any ideas for a descriptioN?
>>28297645> otherDio Brando.
>>28297653there is always next timeWhat pokemon do you think each Dastardly would catch?
>>28297697Dick: AlakazamJustice: DragoniteGunther: MachampAstraia: Charizard
>>28297685that would be....something else
>>28297645>[X] AstraiaDescriptoin? Maybe something like Dick dastardly faces his greatest challange yet...a family reunion.
>>28297697We do not catch...we make either a think and lanky pokemon that has a tuxedo and cane (fighting/dark) or some sort of loli pokemon
>>28297723I dunno about the machamp, I think he might go for graveler just for the smashing itself into things factor
>>28297694seems like twig won
>>28297758Wait, I got it.He would be tyrantrum from the new pokemons.
>>28297754There are Ralts for loli pokemonAnd gothoritaNo reply fancy cloak and cane ones though Astraia I see going Ninetails because they are more vindictiveJustice might actually go Arcanine just because they are associated with loyalty and the poke police
>>28297783I've been waiting for this since you guys fucked the first world like a two cent whore
>>28297795Hahaha yes perfectIt suits him in every way
>>28297786(going with twig)You are Astraia dastardly, and you are in a train.You look around, your "family" Appears to be asleep. You look outside to see a city in the distance, one larger than bowerstone. Cuddled next to you is the former jack of blades.The morning sun is shiny bright and good over a perfectly burnable field.What do you do wake up your family go for a morning walk get some food Question sanity other
>>28297884also I assume we need a pastebin for twig now
>>28297884> Question sanity> get some foodOne pile food for Gunther and another one for the rest of the family.
>>28297884>Go for a walk, carry Fluffy under one arm (she likes ear scritches). Periodically pick up a blad of grass and set it on fire.
>>28297884Go for a morning walk with kitty of bladesFind something flammable while we walkOr something that isn't flammable that we can make flammable just by the sheer amount of fire we pour onto it
>>28297902Nah, just a full name for her. Or did she only inherit "Dastardly"?
>>28297943Both her and gunther have the full dastardly name and the title the forth, similar to the massive amounts of dastardly the thirds around the multiverse
>>28297925are you referring to kitty jack or corgi
>>28297992I'd completely forgotten there was a corgi. So kitty Fluf.
>>28297932>>28297925You decide to explore the world, and what better way than walking with your "pet" and setting some of it on fire. You grab the cat eared girl and turn the lever like handle on the door. The sun hurts your eyes and the air tastes....real? how strange. Its a cold Autumn day and the grass dances slowly in the wind.You can see a grand mansion not that far off from the train, its closer than the town. There are trees here and there. and a nice little river.What do you do this is perfect for burning roll1d100 What a nice place go towards the mansion go towards the town other
>>28298138> go towards the mansion
>>28298159>>28298159is there anyone else here?a
>>28298206This is odd, where did everyone go?
>>28298234I don't know? this makes me sad, I really want to continue the quest tonight
>>28298138>[X] go towards the mansion
>>28298277>>28298277Oh thank the lord
>>28298290Sorry about that went to make me something EVIL to eat.
>>28298313>something EVIL to eat.Nachos?
>>28298328Peanut butter sandwitches.The ultimate evil food because it's hard hunting down witches.
>>28298277You decide to go to the mansion. it looks like a nice enough place, you wonder if its flammable. You follow a path up to it. it has a wall of brick around it and an iron gate. There is a plaque near the plate withe the word "Joestar" on it. What a strange word. You can see a two men inside the wall that are around the size of Gunther. One with......blue hair? the other with blond. There is also a small grave in viewwhat do you do Try to get in Looks boring Call out to them get Gunther Think I can run this with just two people?
>>28298385I had an mini version of thanksgiving dinner earlier
>>28298396>Think I can run this with just two people?not sure> Looks boringBurn the place
>>28298416also it seems like this is rather dead
>>28298443>>28298443Yeah I think this is where we'll end it tonight seeing as it seems everyone vanished. I may run this tomorrow If I can, but I definatly will on Sunday. Same time as always5pm est, stay classy
>>28298396[X] Looks boring.Burn it all down.
>>28298502I believe people either left because you asked to archive this or because they didn't like the new setting somehow.
>>28298460I hope he doesn't....lose his head!
>>28298535This tends to happen, and I doubt the latter as there were, what, five votes for JOJO. I do wonder were they went though. But I will try to run it tommorow as I have a lot planned
>>28298557Vampire dio vs Really pissed off Guntherwho wins?
>>28298589The question should be, what is Gunther's stand?
>>28298615>>28298615A better question, What is its ability?
>>28298631Allows anything to be punched. Even abstract concepts.
>>28298644Dio tries to use the worldGunther punches timeNat 100Dio can't use time bullshit.
>>28298673Or imgine if Gunther punches the concept of the letter D out of Dio's name. He becomes Io Brano and lose all concept of his identity.
>>28298715Gunther punches the concept of death.what happens?
>>28298502I'm still here, but have never read jojo's bizzare adventure so I'm just letting people make suggestions until I know wtf is going on
>>28298730Guro porn would become much more mainstream.>>28298751The only thing you have to know is that its about over the top awesome action with an hint of humor.
>>28298751Basically what he >>28298751said.But I'll try to run this tomorrow.Just so you know the two men infront of Astraia are JONATHAN JOESTARE (too much of a good guy) AND DIO BRANDO (More of a dick than Dick). one of them becomes a vampire, no matter what you try and stop
>>28298769oh how Jojo would change
>>28298730Crazy stuff starts happening.
>>28298834Couldn't we make both of them vampires?
>>28298877I honestly would love that, seeing as I wanted Jojo to pick up the stone mask to beat the shit out of vampire dio. Instead he let the house kick dio's ass for him
>>28298834He can't become a vampire if he's dead.
>>28298921Lets see about everyone's stand.Dick: The World's TrainAllows him to fetch and send things across dimensions, including souls and objectsJustice: Arcana JusticeStrength proportional to the amount of crimes commited by her opponent.Gunther: Punch the heaven!Allow him to punch anything.Astraia: Some girls want to see the whole world burnMake her fire burn anything. Slower but longer lasting than Gunther ability.
>>28298997>Dio>Ever dyingThough there is that problem.
>>28299020Dick hits him with a train, gets up and dust self offAstraia sets him on fire (please see what happened why JoJo tried that)Gunther punches him/ tears him into several pieces, he punch him back despite being a floating cloud of limbsJustice.......would Stab/burn him?
>>28299008weren't all stands named after songs are am I mistaken?but I do like the abilities. also if you make stands for the Dick hunters (aka Vilian and crew) I'd be most pleased
>>28299086WHy the fuck did I put are there? this is probably a sign that I need sleep
>>28299086I don't know enough about music to properly find good song or album titles sadly.
>>28299103Something wicked that way went For dickSin of Justice/ Hypocrite justice/ justice breaker for justice Burn it down for AstraiaFive finger death punch for Gunther
>>28299056I also just realized I put why there in stead of when, I really need to go to sleep
>>28299177Perfect!Fritz could be Powerslave, hehehehe
>>28299191Perhaps. I do so ever hope tomorrows thread is longer
>>28299229Also, Keep up the good work MT.
>>28297645Gunther would obvious catch a steelix with max health and defense EVs, by wrestling it into the pokeball with his bare hands