>>28152327
Look up Chuck.

>>28152373
I understand how chuck works and chuck is theoretical optimization. This is a thing I can do in my game without even trying. I literally just have to cast one of the spells and my friend the other and we're going on a trip of FAST.

>>28152327
You're just barely subsanic. 1k feet per second versus 1,126 feet per second.

>>28152491
I just realized that 600ft is just a move action, unless someone else can see something I'm missing wind walk's 600ft clause is just a mode you can turn on and off that lets you move at 600ft as a move action so a double move is 1200 and triple if you have travel devotion (you're a cleric anyway you probably should) at 1800ft
+ fly like an arrow lets you move at 3000 per second so super sanic.

>>28152611
I'm not hugely familiar with the rules for 3.5 but I'm pretty sure that dropping something you're holding is a free action.
It might be time to ask your DM what happens to a rock you're holding and let go of midway through your movement.
For that matter what if you grappled someone started flying, then let go of them?

>>28152657
you don't mix D&D physics with real world physics or get stupid shit real fast. However I guess the grappling thing works pretty well since you can just go 1800ft UP.

>>28152327
Is your DM kinda dickish ?
Because you may well end up running into a cliff-face at mach 3

>>28152726
well, it is very poor maneuverability and a straight line so that is entirely feasible. However this is D&D and there are a multitude of ways for spell casters of that level to avoid things like cliffs. Or just fly high enough that you won't run into anything or something something.

I'm not particularly going fast for reason, if I wanted to exploit the speed I probably could but oh man who doesn't want to go that fast? both spells last HOURS so you can fucking fly everywhere aww yeah.

>>28152611
If it's just a move action take sprint and run at 3000 fpr base, 30000 fpr with fly like an arrow, then fly down for 60000. Mach 10 or so.

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>>28152765
>Pile-driving everything into the ground at mach-10 for insta-kills

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>>28152765
unfortunately it WAIT NO oh my gosh I thought it was like a bunch of the other flight spells that explicitly say you can't run haha holy shit TIME FOR RADICAL GOOD SPEED.

OP, you've just retroactively powered the superfast airship my players hijacked, thanks.

>>28152657
That's similar to Peasant Railgun, in that it's a broken equation.
It uses game mechanics to break physics for the first half. But then it uses physics to break game mechanics for the second half. You can't switch halfway through like that.

HOWEVER, I figured out a use for Peasant Railgun that eliminates the problem.
It's not a weapon.
It's magical FedEx.
First, you buy a building in every major city. The most centrally located is Headquarters. All others are Branch Offices.
Second, you dig long straight tunnels connecting all of the Branch Offices to headquarters.
Fourth, you get a shit-ton of undead under your control.
Fifth, you use the Prepared Action Chain from Peasant Railgun to move packages from the origin Branch Office, to Headquarters, to the nearest Branch Office to it's destination. Then, either the recipient picks up the package at the office, or (for a small fee), the package is delivered by mundane currier.

>>28152952
Is there anything you CAN'T do with a combination of undead and a little cleverness?

>>28152974
bring her back the way she was

unscramble and egg

get bored

>>28152611
Can't you run at 4x speed? 5x if you have the Run feat.

Can you "run" while flying?

>>28152327
I KNOW WHAT TO DO
Splash one level Lion Totem Barbarian, get Pounce, a full attack (i.e. touch spell) after you charge. Commit four feats to get Roof Jumper from Cityscape. +2d6 damage per ten feet you "fall" on a charge.

>>28152997
>bring her back the way she was
Worked fine with Tricia Elri-
Okay I can't finish that joke with a straight face.

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>>28153019
Speaking of horrifying abominations against nature created by Alchemists overstepping their bounds...

>>28152952
wait what are the undead for?

>>28153018
that uh...i believe that works. but it's technically for every 10 feet after 20

>>28153030
You place the undead in the tunnels.
They perform the prepared action chaining exploit to move the packages.

>>28152952
First the Necro-computer, now the Necronet.
Is there ANYTHING Necromancy can't do?

>>28153026
>is that the girl from FMA

every fucking time

>>28153044
It's the "Get over here and fuck me" that usually sets me off for the second round.

>>28152327
Air resistance will most likely kill you.

>>28153026
I don;t watch chinese cartoons. Could somebody explain the joke? Or at least give me a keyword to search.

>>28153074
She got magically chimera'd with a dog. Then died.

>>28153008
you sure can as >>28152765 pointed out. Mach 10 indeed.

>>28153018
I mean I know what to do with it too but I don't particularly want to. However if we're playing the theoretical game of what I could do:

Bind Paimon as a binder, free attack against anyone I run by, which is a lot of fucking people. There is that one spell that lets you leave a trail of fucking fire that lasts a few rounds and does 2d6(?) everywhere you've walked that round. Then there is the usual route of getting an absurd jump check off your speed and going exemplar or whatever and turn that jump check into diplomacy but that might be weird because you are using flight speed instead of land and you have to jump at the end but whatever.
there is also tornado throw from tome of battle. I might be missing one or two other things but that is mostly it. D&D doesn't have a very direct speed->damage mechanic.
>>28153018
you still take all that falling damage. Not exactly ideal

>>28153074
Fullmetal Alchemist. Bitch gets turned into a dogmon.

>>28153074
it was on adult swim how uncultured can you be?

>>28153074
Okay, real short version.
In Fullmetal Alchemist, there's a dude named Shou Tucker.
Tucker is an Alchemist who specializes in BioAlchemy. Put plainly, he makes Chimeras.
He received a post as a State Alchemist (gets a stipend and access to government resources in exchange for his research), by creating a Chimera that could comprehend and reproduce human speech.
He acts as a mentor of sorts to the protagonists, the Elric brothers. The boys also developed a friendship with his daughter, Nina, the girl in the pic.
Tucker is going to lose his post soon if he can't reproduce his results. So, in desperation, he fuses his own daughter with the family pet, a dog.

>>28153086
>>28153098
Ouch.
>>28153101
Not american, and I don't really watch TV.

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>>28153101
>Adult Swim
>culture

>>28152952

Derailed by the best post of the day.

necronet /deadmail

>>28153108

You forgot to mention that she was mercy-killed by the antagonist. Because she was in constant pain.

>>28152327
>goes fast
>accidentally hits 45 degree slope
>ramp off to timbuktu

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>>28152805
>Pile-driving everything into the ground at mach-10 for insta-kills

I now have a new character concept

>>28153391
flying really fast

>>28153040
>Necronet
>Not Ded Ex

>>28153365

Alternative names:

>Amazombie
>SkelEx
>U(ndead)PS
>The Royal Mail

>>28153035
Skeletons and zombies can't prepare actions.

>>28153624

Ah.

Wait, this doesn't bugger up the Quantum Skellington Super Computer does it?

>>28152805
> burn down from air friction

>>28153108
>>28153377
He also chimera`d his wife as I remember it, to get a State Achemist post. Poor thing refused to eat and asked for mercy kill.

>>28153647
Doubtful, because while they cannot prepare actions, they do respond to commands. You could command one to prepare an action, and then it will just wait, because you actually have to order it to fulfill the prepared action, taking the 'prepared' part of the equation out.

>>28153624
Uhh, can Golems? Might be less frowned upon by the peoples of the lands too.

>>28152952
>Super Ded Ex delivery
>Package being sent about three hundred miles
>Skeleton hands off package
>Hand gets caught on hand of skeleton it's passing off to
>Gets dragged along
>Naturally, it ends up dragging the skeleton that just passed it along as well
>And so on, and so on
>Rumbling at the destination post office
>Last skeleton in line passes off 74,000 other skeletons out the tunnel
>Half of the city is destroyed
>Package remains undelivered

>>28153040
NecroNet is already a thing, go play Urban Dead

>>28153765
No, they can't. This is why most people who leave undead or golems in places give a single simple command - "kill anyone who enters."

They can perform very basic "if>then" functions but the problem is they can only do it once, and then they stop. And they can't "prepare an action" because if you tell one to "prepare to do this" that's all they can do - they can't actually ACT on anything, including whatever it is you are preparing them to do (they just keep on preparing even when the thing that you asked them to prepare for is happening).

>>28153877
>They can perform very basic "if>then"

Alright.

"If you are handed something, then hand it to the next skeleton in line."

>>28153877
>only do it once
Really? I thought undead continued to do stuff untill you told them to stop. Sweeping floors, fetching water and whatnot.

So if you tell one to guard a room and attack all who enter they only attack once, meaning that a party can enter, leave and then enter again to traverse the room safely. Sounds like a big flaw.

>>28153900
The problem with that is that it doesn't count as a prepared action, it's a move action and a standard action.

The whole point of the peasant railgun is it uses prepared actions.

>>28153877

"Kill anyone that enters" is a far more complex command than "Recieve package, pass it forward and get ready to recieve next package, though.

>>28153947
Got a link to the relevant rules text?

>>28153950
"Kill anyone that enters" order is also quite dangerous for creator. Or anyone impersonating him.

>>28153950
Welcome to D&D.

>>28153937
They repeat specified actions indefinitely yes. But the problem is again, prepared actions. If you tell a skeleton "prepare an action to give what you are given to the next skeleton" It will do that....but it doesn't STOP doing that (hence the skeletons you mentioned will continue to attack anything living in the room when it enters). If you tell the skeleton "i someone presses this switch do this, and if it presses that switch do that", it will do that thing only once because now that thing has been done - the repetitive action can't be completed twice because the action is now complete, and there isn't a way to reset it without saying 'now reset the switch to it's original position'. That's the problem with simple command sentences.

>>28153950
It's the "get ready" part that fucks you. It will get ready and always get ready. There isn't an "end" to that.

>>28153950
It's undead. It's very good at killing things. If it's uncontrolled it will do that all on it's own.

>>28153980

>1: "prepare an action to give what you are given to the next skeleton"
>2: IF recieve package THEN execute 3
>3: "Give package to next skeleton"
>4: IF 3 THEN goto 1

Shit, if industrial robots can do this shit then so can skeletons

>>28153980
Prepare to receive package,
if offered a package then take it
then pass it along to the next entity which is not the one you have received a package from
Repeat

algorithms do you even do them

>>28153958
Animate dead:
This spell turns corpses into undead skeletons or zombies that obey your spoken commands.

The undead can be made to follow you, or they can be made to remain in an area and attack any creature (or just a specific kind of creature) entering the place. They remain animated until they are destroyed. A destroyed skeleton or zombie can't be animated again.

Basically you can tell them to follow you, and kill things.

>>28153958
http://www.d20pfsrd.com/magic/all-spells/a/animate-dead

>>28153999
>>28154002
They only follow their last given command, you know, which is "repeat" or "goto one".

Which could be very awkward for The One when a bunch of skeletons and zombies barge in while he's taking a bath.

>>28154004
>The undead can be made to follow you, or they can be made to remain in an area and attack any creature (or just a specific kind of creature) entering the place. They remain animated until they are destroyed. A destroyed skeleton or zombie can't be animated again.

That's a set of examples, not an exclusive list.

The Operative condition is "that obey your spoken commands."

>>28154009
>Pathfinder

Scrub

So if I command "Pass packages to skeleton forward of you (all the time)", or "perform motion as if you are passing packages to skeleton forward of you" he would do it indefinitly? All I have to do is give him a package manually.
Or the problem is about "pass" being two actions?

>>28154023
That's an absurd departure form logic.

The *only* stipulation is that they obey your spoken commands.

The problem with the peasant railgun is that you ignore the principle of passing an object, when I pass an object to someone I stop to ensure that they receive the object and even if it was a continuous movement there still wouldn't be a significant amount of acceleration due to the physical limits of the peasants themselves and also the fact that the package is moving at only the rate of passing (which does not increase). Yes momentum is conserved but there is no significant force 'build-up' as the scenario postulates, hence how can it be a railgun?

>>28154031
If we assume
>>28154027
>That's a set of examples, not an exclusive list.

is wrong, true or not, for the sake of argument then yes you could just make them a conveyor belt that's always on. Just have to be careful when you hand the box over or else >>28153812.

>>28154023
If they understand the concept of "kill anything that enters" which is a passive concept that requires the same logic the present algorithms provide

>1. unknown entity enters the 'room'
>2. take actions to remove presence from 'room'
>3. if presence = removed from 'room' go to 1

so they will understand the concept of repeat. if you want to be pedantic

>1: "prepare an action to give what you are given to the next skeleton, go to line 2"
>2: IF recieve package THEN execute 3
>3: "Give package to next skeleton"
>4: IF 3 THEN goto 1

>>28154043
Because the object has moved an absurd distance within the scope of 6 seconds.

The idea is not the reality of the exercise, but in how the D&D rules react in retarded ways with reality.

>>28154046
Utter lack of understanding how physics works.

>>28154082
>D&D
>Physics
Someone didn't read the OP.

>>28154074
No. When I pass an object, regardless of the spacing of the timeframe, the system is always reset as any movement to receive the package absorbs incoming momentum hence >>28154043

>>28153765
> Golems
> less frowned upon
You bind a sentient elemental spirit to the eternity of slavery in alien enviroment. That`s pretty fucking evil in my book.

>>28154086
None of that is ever mentioned under D&D rules, therefore for purposes of the rules it doesn't exist.

As far as the Rules are concerned, a metal rod just moved several kilometres in a few seconds.

>>28154084
You're ignoring the fact that 74,000 skeletons have mass far beyond the capability of one skeleton's ability to move objects ergo utter lack of understanding how even D&D physics work.

>>28154095
> My headcanon goes for all fantasy ever.

>>28154095
>You bind a sentient elemental spirit to the eternity of slavery in alien enviroment. That`s pretty fucking evil in my book.

Only the more powerful elementals are sentient, the ones you use for golems are basically animal like in intelligence.

But yeah, there's a reason why they have a % chance to go insane in combat.

>>28154095
Yes, but the peasants don't see a spooky skeleton who might have been their mum delivering mail. They probably wouldn't know that Golems are "enslaved"

>>28154098
I'd like to point out that there is NO game which mentions that aspect of reality in their rules.

>>28154098
No it did not.

Free Action

"Free actions consume a very small amount of time and effort. You can perform one or more free actions while taking another action normally. However, there are reasonable limits on what you can really do for free. "

http://www.d20srd.org/srd/combat/actionsInCombat.htm

When you start arguing about motion you're delving into the realm of real world mechanics, then you have to acknowledge real world mechanics as being valid in this scenario, as it stands there are limits to what a 'free' action covers and that's not reasonable, ergo shut up.

>>28154098
So how do I shoot a bow? How do I swing a sword? Why are objects solid in this game? How can I differentiate between liquids and gases? What makes all of reality tangible? The D&D ruleset doesn't cover any of that, so therefore by the rules it doesn't happen.

>>28154133
>>28154124
>>28154116

Welcome to D&D. It's shit.

Even if you can't have it travel at the physics-breaking speeds being suggested in this thread, it would still be a revolutionary thing for trade to be able to send things securely over vast distances, assuming wizards can't just make mass teleportation circles/portals/what have you. A courier on a horse would probably move faster than a skeleton could hand off a box, but the Skellys don't need to stop and rest or have to worry about bandits assuming it's in a tunnel.
At that point it might be faster and follow the anon suggesting they can only take one command at a time to just give a skeleton the package and have him run to the other end of the tunnel, needs less skellys too.

>>28154148
By that standard there isn't a shit game in the world because none of them have those rules included.

Good one, Captain Oblivious.

GUISE

I KNOW HOW IT CAN BE DONE

ELITE KARRNATHI SKELETONS

>>28154095
If you are a good wizard, you form a contract first.
If you are an evil one, you now have an elemental prince worth a name and few pc levels on your tail, looking for his beloved dog, or shotgun marriage you to ball of fire, who was his teenage daughter.

>>28154165
/tg/ is obsessed with skeletons.
If you are a caster that can afford to set up this ridiculous network you can also just set up some gates. Hell tiny gates made for transporting small objects like a postal service are cheap even.

>>28154396
also alternatively if you guys want to exploit stupid rules things like this for weird consequences. just shoot an arrow to wherever you want or throw or whatever, worst case your to-hit is waaaay negative but who cares worst your arrow or whatever misses the square and lands in an adjacent square woop de doo

>>28152952
>I figured out
/tg/ has known about the light speed peasant comma network for ages

>>28154421
There's no rule stating where your arrow lands if you miss. It'll just go a reasonable distance then stop.

Re: Skeletons and readied actions, I think that guy saying you can't is right. Yes, you can command them to pass it along. They'll start doing so, at normal speed. Why would skeletons default to an exploit of D&D's passing rules?

>>28152726
You have feather fall and Fly doesn't drop you when it ends (because wizards can't have drawbacks). Just point yourself slightly upwards.

>>28154255
>shotgun marriage you to ball of fire, who was his teenage daughter.
Not seeing a problem here.

>>28154532
Becasue these idiots like to think that "presuming a totally permissive GM this wrks".

Sadly, not even Pun-Pun works, because the stat increase is based off of the ORIGINAL stat, not the newly enhanced stat. Meaning you can't enhance it any further.

That's the level of retard you're arguing with.

>>28155004
yeah that honestly doesn't seem too bad. I bet I could figure out how to fuck fire if I was a wizard

>>28155008
>I am superior to many years of charoppers dissecting everything

>>28155249
>pun pun offends my dms honour
>therefore it must be impossible
sorry >>28155008, it really is that badly written. it's not a reflection on your dming that you have to house rule it and can't find a raw way to deny it. just grow a sense of humour, accept it, mock the writer, and if anyone tries to bring it into your game, point and laugh.

>>28152871
The secret is the caster gets out and pushes.

>>28155249
>implying charoppers aren't lying sacks of RAWhateverIwant bullshit

Post other broken stupid shit in DnD, I'm curious if things get much stupider than peasant railgun

>>28155356
>what are the last 13 years
Please don't. 3e's rules-as-physics approach has caused enough brain damage.

>>28155364
Well, has anyone made stupid shit for 5e?

>>28155393
Wizards of the Coat.

>>28155397
FUCK. Coast. There goes my sick burn. :(

>>28155403
But seriously, Mearls.

>>28155403
I dunno, "Wizards of the Coat" sounds like an awesome fashion chain.

>>28155422
Shame the clothes fall apart at the seams when you try to actually wear them. At least their Magic the Hat line is well-made.

Is there actually a possibility of being a necromancer in Next?

>>28155422

Wizards of the Coats. For stylish, elegant and proper robes and magewear, look no further.

>>28155004
I would think that she would be
(•_•)
( •_•)>⌐■-■
(⌐■_■)
Hot.

>>28155459
Probably not yet. They're doing the generic thing first. They are having enough trouble just trying to make the thing playable.

Make sure you have damage resistance, or you might run into a bird or something and die horribly.

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>>28152710

>>28154069
The real question is: Why don't you just hire a demon/devil under an contract to do it, they do it instantaneously and considering the contract they can do it pretty damn well.

In fact why isn't this whole thing about how everything would be better with metaphysical beings under binding contracts? Demonology clearly is superior to necromancy in that way.

>>28155189
It's a ball of fire.
Sure it's spherical and sure with a nice fire resistance spell you can probably stick your dick in it but you won't feel anything.

It'd be like humping the air, or an air elemental.

>>28152952
I approve of this.

>>28153990
Then phrase the command to not say "get ready". As several have already done. It's not that complicated, bro, quit trying to make it that complicated.

>>28154098
>>28154086
>>28154074
>>28154043
Somewhere in here people started arguing with each other and not even about the things they were talking about.

>>28154116
>I'd like to point out that there is NO game which mentions that aspect of reality in their rules.
GURPS

>>28154124
>When you start arguing about motion you're delving into the realm of real world mechanics
I think they are arguing against involving real world mechanics, actually.

>>28154133
>So how do I shoot a bow? How do I swing a sword? Why are objects solid in this game? How can I differentiate between liquids and gases? What makes all of reality tangible?
Roll attack. Roll attack. Only if they aren't incorporeal. DC 5 Spot Check. It's not (alternative answer: Belief.).

>>28153999
You used gotos.
Plus, you defined the function "3" after it was called in the program. How does that work?

import uospy
from motor_msgs.msg import Jaunt

def packagePass():
Insert motor controls required to hand the package to the next skeleton here in the Jaunt message format

skellyhand1 = skelhand()
packageReceiveCoordinates = Optimum Jaunt coordinates for a skeleton's hand to receive a package.

while not uospy.is_shutdown:
if skellyhand1.pos <> packageReceiveCoordinates:
skellyhand1.pos = packageReceiveCoordinates
if skellyhand1.full == "True":
packagePass()
skellyhand1.pos = packageRecieveCoordinates

>>28158845
>Not coding your skeletons in C

>>28158936
The fantasy python-knockoff I can't be bothered to make up a name for (let's call it naga) suits my purposes best. Plus, I sadly do not know much C.

>>28152327
I don't think there are any RPGs that don't have a relatively easy break for movement speed. Because it isn't in itself a damage effect, it isn't something that they tend to apply close playtesting for. or do math on.

So you'll end up with shit like a non-supernatural human who just has some advantages that allow him to run fast. so "movement speed 14."

Then you do the math and realize that means you're twice as fast as Usain Bolt. Your top speed is 72 MPH. You have no real limit on how long you can keep this speed up.

But until you add some mechanic where you can hit a guy and keep running, allowing you to stand a football field away during their turn, charge in, hit, and run back, it's just a quirky little rule break, not a game breaker.

>>28158969
>fantasy python-knockoff I can't be bothered to make up a name for (let's call it naga)

My Sides.

(Mind Flayers code in Brainfuck)

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>>28158969
>code in Naga
>wizards feel underpowered in comparison

>>28159140
Oh crap. Why didn't I name Undead Operating System (UOS) Undead Animation System instead?

>>28156680
but
you can't move if you're being grappled
so the dragon couldn't have left the ground

>>28159289
Because a regular sized Orc can totally pin down a dragon.

>>28159289
Grappled, not pinned. Grappled creatures can still attempt limited movement, and creatures at least two size categories larger can move freely.

>>28159493
He can. He didn't get the pin until airborne though.

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>>28159493

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>3.5
>One of my players is really excited about his prestige class
>Take a look at it
>It sucks incredibly hard

How do I tell him?

>>28159999

How long has been playing?

>>28160193
Longer than I have.

>>28160360

Then let him play it. If he's that excited, he'll have fun whether it sucks or not.

>>28159999
who cares, let him have fun lol

>>28160667
He won't be having fun when he realises how sub-par it is though, he's sort of a power gamer...who kinda sucks at it.

I just don't know whether to suggest something else to him or not.

>>28157369
wizard

>>28160698
Ask him if he's recognised the problem. If he has, maybe he's trying to challenge himself? If not... welp.

>>28160749
I doubt he's recognised it. He's bragging about being able to do 20d6 worth of damage across two turns, when thats not even that great at level 17, which is when the class gets it.

Especially when another Prestige class can do that exact same damage, one level sooner, and their abilities are better in almost ever aspect.

>>28160802
holy shit 20d6 damage at level 3! that's pretty sweet!

it's not level 3, is it.

>17
holy shit.

>>28160936
wait, wait, I didn't even realise it was across two turns. 35 dpr at level 17.

Just write down that number for him. Some people get overwhelmed by ALL THE DICE and forget to do basic maths.

>>28160735
No it's an magical elemental being.

It's more of an sorceress if it actually has a gender, wait i got it. The wizard clearly needs to use polymorph, though i don't know how it actually handles that, i think polymorph just makes you look like them not actually turn into that race.

>>28160802
Wait, that dude's practically being out-damaged by a rogue with a +1 dagger, no feats, and sneak attack.

>>28161577
dude. Wizards. Magic 'n shit.

>>28161639
Well does the wizard have it in his spellbook? How about the level requirement?

And think about failing the concentration check as your ball of flame waifu coyly shake her (quite literally) hot flame vagoo at you? What if the flame elemental royality can't provide the resources and your waifu won't let you go get them?

Shit man forget not explaining this shit, we got (again, literally) hot ass to tap and we got so many problems about how to do it!

>>28161761
if you don't have your spellbook or other resources you've already lost