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>>27860626
Here it is served. I didnt bother making salad this time around because the fishballs were so damn good.

It is a variant on a danish dish called Frikadeller only instead of making it with pork, I made it with some lean white fish as the base, made the mix with flour, eggs and seasoning and then added roughly chopped salmon in to give it a little more texture and that awesome salmon taste

>eating while playing traditional games
>getting your dice all greasy
YOU AND YOUR KIND DISGUST ME OP

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>>27860640
I also made home made croutons for the dish but realising I didnt bother making salad, we just used them to snack on instead. Holy fuck I never made croutons like this before but I have rarely had as great home made snacks at the gaming table.

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>>27860645
>eating while gaming
>not using knife, fork and plate
Do you even food?

I made this a few times thus far as well. Its pretty popular and super delicious.
We usually meet up at 4pm, play a few hours, then I leave for 10 mins time to prepare the food and return to the game and ~45 mins later dinner is ready.

After dinner, we continue the game with a full belly

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Incorrect, fish is disgusting.

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>>27860669
I tested out a thing I wanted to try out with pancakes and it was delicious as all hell as well.

A simple pancake with relatively finely cut pieces of apple, sprinkled with sugar and lime and then rolling up the pancake. Unlike normal pancakes, this was fresh and nice and didnt give you that fatty-fat-laid-back feeling which makes you too tired to play properly afterwards. I can warmly recommend it if you are the kind of guy who also makes desserts some times. I rarely do, but after this I just may do it again because it was glorious

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>>27860672
Nah you just had fish made by a bad cook. If you make it properly, fish can be delicious as all fuck.

Alternatively, just make something else. I can recommend beef seasoned with ginger and garlic along with some oven baked potatos, some nice good salad (none of that iceberg salad crap some people mistake for real salad) and some simple sour cream for dressing. It is quite good.

>>27860704
Do you mind if I ask if you are the DM of the game or a player?

>>27860687
God damnit, who threw up on my pancake?

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>>27860762
Im the DM in one campaign and player in another campaign.

We usually take turns to make dinner in the one where I am the player and I just make dinner when I DM because I like it

>>27860786

God-tier DM. Would submit a 2,500 word backstory.

>>27860786
Well, In that case you are my vote for best DM of (*Insert choice of years*). I mean, dinner and a show (good dinner to, not lazy shit). I love to cook myself but when I DM I am always way to wiped to cook for them. Granted I run games in excess of 12 hours weekly for a large group but still.
For our groups we usually get pizza if we are at Uni or if we are at my friends place he goes massivly overboard and cooks us something delicious and 5 start that we are all far too poor and hungry to properly appreciate.

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>>27860807
>>27860813
Thanks guys. I just really like cooking and I love it when people enjoy food I made so thats that I guess.

Plus, having been a student for quite a few years, Im good at bargain-hunting so its pretty inexpensive too. I only wish my players would at least offer to do the dishes after dinner but you cant win them all I guess.

Hell, we even have a dishwashing machine so it would be 5 minutes maximum if they all did a little something each

We has BBQ, when I can get a leg of lamb or goat sometimes, butterfly it wide open, leave overnight in a mix of olive oil, garlic and some herbs to soak up some flavours.
Crank the BBQ up to about a medium temp, lay down the meat on a bed of rosemary branches with the hood down and burn the fucker for about 15mins on each side, then lower the temp off a bit for another hour.
Meat fest!

>>27860807
God-tier DM. Would submit humble application to play whatever character he allowed me.

>>27860844
>not doing the dishes after being cooked a delicious meal by their DM
>+5 to CR of next encounter per dirty dish
Whenever my friend cooks for us on game night he tells us that no one is going home until the kitchen is clean and goes for a nap on the couch.

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>>27860813
We used to get pizza as well in an older campaign but that was when we played at one of the other guys place at his dormatory. Space was really limited and the kitchen was shared with a bunch of retards who didnt know the meaning of doing their own fucking dishes or not taking up all the space by themselves so I didnt want to offer cooking there. Besides, i usually sharpen my knives every few weeks, and the knives they had there couldnt even cut through bread without applying significant force so I guess Im a bit pedantic on that side of things.

Btw, pic related is not burned - its just colored from balsamic vinegar which has been reduced with the chicken in it

>meatballs
>fish

wut
r u a transmuter?

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>>27860844
holy fuck that was a bad picture. Oh well, have another one instead I guess.

>>27860867
I understand that feeling completely, but I guess Im too much of a nice guy to bother doing that. Besides, I have a great group and not a single that-guy (not that I get many because I only play with people I already know but stll - the dynamics are nice).

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>>27860878
Yep, specialized in transmuting and with DM permission I also got to take necromancy as a second specialization, forfeiting all other schools. My meatballs are made of fish and if you dont do the dishes, they will kill you from the inside as I animate them and make them use your ribs as daggers

...... now im hungry, off to the store.

I'd like to cook for my group, but I know for a fact it wouldn't be appreciated, so I don't bother. Most of the players don't give two shits about food and pretty much shovel in anything vaguely digestible.
The other one is quite picky, and refuses to eat anything other than sandwiches, snack food, and his own boogers. Openly. At the table.

I make what we used to call Taco soup, but I have no idea why.

>Chorizo or ground sirloin seasoned with taco seasoning
>Tomato sauce
>Diced tomatos
>Kidney beans, light and dark
>Corn
Top with
>Cheese
>Sour Cream
>Frito Chips

It goes over well.

>>27860882
>tzatziki
It's called cacik.

>>27860917

I also make amazing cinnamon rolls.

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>>27860917
not counting the cheese and chips on top, that sounds a lot like my chili con carne (except I also add dark beer and super dark chocolate, have it cook for an hour at minimum and use minced beef instead of chorizo)

>>27860929

It is close to a chili. Not nearly as spicy but it is thick and filling.

>>27860626

Absolutely nothing, because all my games are online and I can't find people IRL to invite over for PnP. Which sucks because I love cooking.

>>27860882 Dont get me wrong, my friend is the nicest guy ever, the reason he goes off for a nap is because after that he drives all of us home.
Especially when you're making that quality of food (not just chips and dip) its common courtesy to help clean up afterwards. We appreciate him cooking up stuff for us so its a simple way to show appreciation by cleaning up afterwards. But I guess different groups have different dynamics.
Also, just remembered something another friend made that is brilliant gamerfuel, Candied Bacon. glorious. The trick is to oven bake it really slowly and use a bit of cinnamon with the sugar. cook it until it looks burnt.
Sorry, no pics, we ate it too fast.

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>>27860929
Doesnt look as appetizing on picture, but fuck that - it tastes amazingly good.

>>27860922
I never heard that before. In what language?

>>27860924
Cinnamon rolls are amazing as gamerfuel as well. I used to make them without sugar and instead of cinnamon, I made a mix of cream cheese, pieces of ham (many pieces of ham), mozerella and bell pepper and put that in instead. Sprinkle ground cheese on top and put in the oven and you will have an amazing food-roll which really feels like a dinner more than a snack.

>>27860940
>Cinnamon rolls are amazing as gamerfuel as well. I used to make them without sugar and instead of cinnamon, I made a mix of cream cheese, pieces of ham (many pieces of ham), mozerella and bell pepper and put that in instead. Sprinkle ground cheese on top and put in the oven and you will have an amazing food-roll which really feels like a dinner more than a snack.

I am making these today.

>>27860940
>I never heard that before. In what language?
It's Turkish.

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>>27860945
Great choice. They dont make a mess if you dont put too much of the filling in so they are great for eating while playing and you can easily bring them to whereever you are playing - hell you can even put them back in the oven for 5 minutes when you arrive and they will feel almost as freshly baked again.

I sometimes make them to bring to work if I cant be arsed to eat whatever putrid shit they make in the company cantina on a particular day

>>27860640
You can also make it with ground beef

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>>27860949
I always thought tzatziki was greek. Huh, you learn something new every day I guess. Just to be clear, we are talking about thick naturel youghurt with very little water in it and with garlic, salt, pepper and cuecumber in it right?

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>>27860974
Making it with ground beef is typically the swedish variant while using minced pork or a mix of pork and veal is more danish. The rest of the recipe is the same basically but I like making it with fish because, making the minced fish from the ground up yourself just feels nicer for some reason.

I dont know it may just be me. They also feel lighter to eat afterwards - they arent as heavy in your belly so you feel like you can run a trip afterwards with the fish variant but not so much with the beef/pork/veal variant I think.

I made some with minced moose once. They were super delicious. Too mad I dont have a pic of them but I do have one of a greek-inspired version I made a while back with cheese and fresh mint in the "batter"

>>27860984
Ah, I was just giving you the origin of the word Cacik since I wasn't sure the other anon would check in. The two are pretty much the same dish, though I think Tzatziki is thicker.

Im gona have to start taking picturesof the dishes i make

>>27860984
Not that guy but chiming in anyway.
What you just described is what Greeks call Tzatziki.

I'm guessing the turkish just call the same (or at least similar) thing cacik

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>>27861056
Great idea. I took pics of these because Im making a cooking book with my wife - because we can I guess - and Im making sure its all very cheap to make and takes as little work to prepare as possible which, in my mind, makes it ideal for gaming fuel.

The exception to the hummus, I dont think I´ve put more than 20 mins work into any of these dishes. It handles itself in the oven or in the pot/pan so I have more time to play. And Hummus is something you can make giant batches of and use in several dishes anyway, so I think that is a saving grace in either case.

>>27861059
>>27861047
That explains it. I was getting a little confused there but it also explains why the cantina at work always has such watery tzatziki I guess. I dont understand why anyone would think that is better than the thicker variant, but different strokes for different folks I guess

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>>27861107
>With the exception being the hummus ... etc
I appologise for my grevious mistake and I beg your forgiveness

Also, here is a chocolate bowl I made for dessert we had one gaming night. It was full of chopped fruit and berries and had a dash of vanilla cream on top.

Chips, dips, pizza, chinese food and soda.

All 5 food groups well represented.

>>27860626
I already do a hundred times as much work as all the players combined, and you expect me to not only let them in my house, but feed them as well? I have no words.

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>>27861197
I think of it more as having great mates over for a nice evening - the fact that we roleplay is just a way for us to have fun together. I like cooking when I have guests over and besides, my games are so stock full of roleplaying and inter-group dynamics that we often dont get much shit done from a plot perspective anyways.

Then sometimes I push the plot farward in small or huge leaps via NPC actions (the queen invades or whatever) and force the players to take new stands on stuff. Actually planning encounters or dungeon crawls is pretty rare because my players arent really the dungeon crawling type most of the time - and thats why I love my group

>>27861238

Can. Can I come over some time?

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>>27861269
That would be lovely but I just moved resently so I dont know when next gaming session will be. Im afraid we will hold the campaigns on a break for now but when I move back in a years time, I hope we will continue.

>>27860940
>Doesnt look as appetizing on picture, but fuck that - it tastes amazingly good.
Making pictures of food is halla difficult, speaking from my own meager experience.

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>>27861509
Agreed. Some foods are easier than others though. Stuff like this looks better because its easier to place properly. Thin sauce is super hard to make look proper if you need more than a thin circle

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>>27861798
I have been considering writing these recipies up and post on /tg/ in the hopes that more people will make food for their grups.

Would it be remotely worth the while? Its really cheap food, very little work and easy to make. It does take a while to make some of the dishes but almost exclusively, any dish which takes more than 25 minutes to make is because it needs to cook for a while and in that time, it takes care of itself anyway

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>mfw I never thought about it and there are fa/tg/uys who are masters on this matter.

>>27860786

I-I want some

>>27860869
>burned
why would anybody think that? that shit looks delish.

>>27861345
>dat leaf
CHEF EXCELLENCE.

>>27861107
Would donate to this kickstarter.

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>>27862045
>>27862090
>>27862101
>>27862127
>>27862251
Daww thanks guys. It would be fun to make a kickstarter actually - so it could pay for the food and all. Right now Its cheap because we make very very good use of the intredients but that also means we make the same food once in a while.

Alternatively, it could be used to cover printing costs for physical books, since laptops really dont belong in a kitchen in my humble oppinion.

We have been talking about even making a section with completely basic tips so even the fa/tg/uy with the biggest neckbeard would be able to use it - along with tips of course.

Because, really - if you know how to boil, fry and roast potatos in a few different ways, cook rice and pasta, know how to make Wok, a nice sauce, eggfried rice and a good inviting base salad (like pic related) you can make an infinite amount of dishes.

On top of that comes marinading, knowing how much time meat has to have in the oven or on the pan and stuff like that.

Oh and it is all almost fat free but still stock full of taste. I have pretty bad reflux so I cant eat fat so its basically food a diabetic could eat in good conscience.

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>>27862436
derp, wrong picture. Thats not really salad now is it? And I couldnt even spell right it seems.

>>27861894
I don't know man, my group usually gets together after dinner.
They also suck at doing dishes.
And I'd have to tell them to pay up for the groceries, which I feel uncomfortable and to lazy to be doing.

>>27862494
Just say it before.
>hey guys, if you bring X YOURLOCALCURRENCYHERE next time, Ill make some dinner. Sounds cool? Awesome! And if I cook, I expect you guys to clean the dishes. Remember it tastes better than pizza, is better for you and way way cheaper.

Make sure to remind them about the deal an hour before they arrive so you can be sure they bring cash and then, instead of asking for money, just have a little glass or something and during dinner say

>Hey btw guys, you can just drop the money in the glass over there.

Done. You dont have to ask anyone directly, they dont have to approach you directly with the money and you can tell them that you just have some DM stuff to clear so if they wouldnt mind doing the dishes mean while, that´d be great.

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>>27862567
Rougher salads basically. A great base you can work out from is:
Shredded carrots
roughly chopped baby spinach (just a handful - dont overdo them
a chopped bell pepper (I prefer red or yellow - and in 1½/1½cm pieces which is roughly ½inch)
Cherry Tomatos if you can afford them. A pack easily lasts for 2-3 salads. Chopped up larger tomatos often end up boring I feel.

For added fun:
-Buy a raw red bead, grade it like you did with the carrots (this is messy. You are warned), soak them well in water a few times with 10 mins minimum between soakings. When the water coming off of them stops being red, they are done. They are a little sweet and taste amazing.
- Spring Onion chopped up in nice small pieces
- radishes in very thin slices make great coloring and taste really well
- make your own crutons by taking some old bread, chop it up in small dices, cook it on a pan at medium head with a little olive oil and whatever spices you like. When crisp and golden brown, they are done - or when you cant bother waiting for them anymore which ever comes first.
- cucumber in small pieces is great as well but cant hold up a salad by itself
- spray it liberally with vinegar. It smells foul by itself and tastes even worse but it really makes a salad come to life. Trust me - I always hated it mysef until I tried it and fuck me if I ever eat salad without it these days. Dont bother wirh the oil though - and make sure you spray it if possible

I dont personally like mushrooms but you can add whatever you like I guess. Just remember it is supposed to feel like a unity with the exception of the tomatos so it all has to be roughly the same size or stuff will stick out. Its not hard though so go forth and experiment!

>>27862451
I would like to thank you for your efforts. Not only are you performing acts of a god-tier DM and host, you are also reducing the quantity of land whales in the world through your use of plant life.

I would add a brofist pic but I dont want to reduce the quantity of food pics. You have inspired me to resume cooking for my group. Again, thank you.

Fruit salad.

We bring our own stuff:
Most of it consists of pizza, snacks, candy, soda etc.
I bring nuts and fruits and drink either tea or water., because reasons. For some reason, I get ripped on for being the only one not filling the neckbeard stereotype.

>>27861126

I love chocolate, it's great to work with.

Vanilla cake with cinnamon and pieces of pear covered in a chocolate sauce made of just butter with chocolate, mmmm

I don't make it often since I'm diabetic and this actually can and will kill me if I don't control myself. Worth it.

>>27860626
I just throw some stuff in the slow cooker come game night. Got a pot roast for this week's game.

>>27861164
you forgot wings

>>27861107
When can I place an order, and where?

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>>27860626
I tried to get my group to make game appropriate meals when we play. 3 people actually did. Since then I do the cooking.

We have a jar where everyone leaves some money for the next shopping and I have a farmer's market right in front of my house on Saturdays (which is usually when we meet).

We meet in the afternoon to get all the chatting done, do some GM housekeeping and maybe play individual scenes. Then we eat a dinner that our characters are eating. Then we play all night. Works pretty well.

We made pizza, stew, adobo, fricassee, curry, and a bunch of other meals I cannot recall right now.

Once a year we go to a LARP where we make fun of knights in costume and play our PnP games for a whole week. There we make all out meals over open fire and when it's not barbecue it's something delicious that simmers for hours in our billycan. Last year s'mores were a big hit.

And yes, we own that tent, only in bigger.

>>27863008
>go to LARP event
>make fun of the people playing
>retreat to your tent and play PnP games

I just don't even know what to say to that. That is some absolute dedication to BS nerdiness tiers right there.

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>>27863008
If anyone cares to translate... I know it's a pain, but metric just comes easier.

>>27863050
>not making fun of LARPers

>>27863076
Don't get me wrong, I have yet to see a LARP that I would willingly join. But paying money to go to where other people are having a good time and taking the piss out of them for it? Not only is that a stupid investment, it's also just about the height of poor manners.

>>27863050
I made it sound worse than it is. The convention used to be half PnP, half one specific LARP with a continuous story and small PnP events to flesh out characters. Over the years the con moved around a lot and now it's 80% that one specific LARP and a few hardcore PnP nerds who still come out of habit.

However, we've been invited to play NPCs in the LARP next year and have enthusiastically started collecting our costumes. And as I said, it's not a real LARP, it's one game where once a year the strategic turn is concluded in live action, but there's no fights acted out and no LARP weapons (actually there's tons of replica weapons and it looks really good).

The knights we make fun of have to kneel outside for a day and a night before they are accepted into the brotherhood. And that DOES get acted out. It's hilariously surreal.

>>27863126
Ah. Carry on, then.

Your portions look tiny as fuck, OP. The absolute minimum sized portion I give my players is a 12oz steak. Also, your meat doesn't look bloody enough.

fatayer and mezze when playing something desert themed. bobotie, gatsby, bunny chow, and boerewors other times. my parents are from south africa and they taught me how to cook so i make mostly south african food, but i also really like middle eastern food so i make some of that also.

...This looks better than anything I ever eat.

I'd be your female friend with benefits just to eat your cooking ;3;

I would donate to a fa/tg/uy cookbook kickstarter.

That'd be crazy rad.

>>27864393
Same here, as long as it included technical advice for the less skilled amongst us.

10/10. Would bulk with

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>>27864393
>A dish ideal for that CoC campaing.
Isn't a bad idea. At all.

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1) make a net out of 350g Bacon
2) mix 1kg ground beef with a diced onion, salt and pepper
3) cut jalapeños or chillies into rings
4) cover the bacon net with beef and jalapeños
5) add barbecue sauce
6) add grated cheese
7) roll everything into a cylindrical shape
8) put into oven at 180°C (360 °F) for about 90 minutes
9) during oven time, use a food-brush to cover it in barbecue sauce

Good Appetite

>>27864512
10/10 would consume while fighting ancient evils

>>27864521
That's a heart attack waiting to happen, and I love it!

>>27864379
Cooking works for that? I'm in the wrong profession.

>>27864393
Hey, normally don't pay much heed to these threads and just saw this while scrolling through the front page and I had to pop in and say that this is a fucking awesome idea. I'd buy it.

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The one and only lord of /tg/.

I only cook to survive, so I make nothing. If they want premade shit or ordering some fast food that's all they are going to get. In exchange I don't care if they don't use coasters.

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I make them pic related.

I fried a slice of balognia and it curled up into a bowl shape, so I had the idea to crack an egg into it and cook it.

Fried balognia isn't even that greasy or slippery so you can hold the whole thing in your hand easily.

It was pretty good.

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Garlic, lemon, and sea salt encrusted rack of lamb with a red wine and butter sauce drizzled on top of it.

Bring leftovers to the meet up is underrated.

>you highson

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>>27864811
See if you can get this stuff. A few drops perfect that dish.

>>27864909
What is that?

Is that some kind of Worchestshire sauce/Soy sauce abomination?

If so, it sounds like it'd be pretty good.

>>27865045
The recipe is secret. It contains quite a dose of MSG. My great uncle used to live on the road to the plant and he explained that there were truckloads of beef bones being trucked there every day.

Imagine perfect beef soup distilled to a sirupy spicy (not hot) molasses.

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>>27860626
I DM at a game store twice a week. For my personal group no one eats.

Lately my DnD encounters group people have been bringing food to share -- like a big meat and cheese tray or oreos. It has been pretty cool. I do not intend on bringing anything myself -- or tell any players that they should -- i already run the game and it's a free program to participate it. If a culture of 'you're expected to bring something some of the time' i'll put a stop to it.

>>27865045
Different anon here. Seen this stuff before, actually. My GF's Chinese roommate has a rather large bottle kicking around. No idea what it tastes like, but going by the ingredients label it's apparently loaded with MSG and other shit.

That and the fact that the English version of the bottle just says, "Seasoning," without any further clarification makes me none too eager to try it.

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I stopped trying to cook for the picky fucks in my group. One won't eat onions. Another won't eat anything green. Another hates fish. Fuck them all. They can fend for themselves.

>>27865129
Same thing on the german bottle pictured above. Würze just means seasoning, without any specific flavour

>>27865148
>won't eat anything green

Really? No green jello, no kiwis, no spinach, no wasabi nuts, or just no vegetables?

>>27865148
>/ck/
>tfw /ck/ left /tg/ for /co/
>instead we got paired with /x/
Come back /ck/!
Please

>>27865218
No green vegetables. Does the fat lady sniff and puke thing.

>>27865238
/x/ is kinda cute though...

My GF is Polish.

Maggi is delicious.

>>27865258
She can't cook though.

>>27865129
It's a German classic famous all over the world, especially Asia and Africa, but also Haiti, Brazil, ...

It's not some strange Chinese seasoning that may or may not contain dogs' livers, eel eyes, or wings of bats.

Let's see how far my English carries. I'm holding a bottle of Maggi in my hand and it reads:

Vegetable protein biologically cracked (water, wheat protein, salt), water, aroma, MSG, salt, sugar.

By law these have to be listed in order of weight percentage. Aroma is a chemical cocktail designed to improve taste and fragrance.

OP, I am so jelly of your players I have no bones

>>27864512
What's that blasphemous green mass of horror on the right side of the plate?

>>27865129
In 1897, Julius Maggi founded the company Maggi GmbH in the German town of Singen, where it is still based today.

>>27865347
I have lots of bones. and more on the way... I'm watching the KS obsessively.

>>27864909
Oh look, a bottle of savory.

>>27865308
I figured it wasn't some weird Chinese thing (there are a few of those kicking around the apartment, and are easily distinguishable by the Chinese characters on their labels). I just prefer not to eat things that seem to have a problem telling me what they are without being legally required to.

Also I try not to consciously ingest MSG. The state of food in America being what it is, I'm sure I get at least some of it (or other equally unhealthy shit) almost every time I eat out. Might as well not add to it if I can avoid it.

>>27865363
Letucce and dandelion. With modena's balsamic vinager.

>>27865448
MSG is in lots of natural food, it's the concentration that is unhealthy. And only for some people directly.

The massively unhealthy thing is taking a glob of grease, adding processed starches and corn syrup, and then making it edible with MSG.

>>27865553
this

>>27860844
you definitely go all out in your plating. i rarely do that when i cook, and go more for family style. but then again, i don't really have appealing plates and sauce bowls.

when i cook for myself, i've been known to eat fried noodles out of a mixing bowl...

>>27860869
you should do an oblique cut on those carrots. it looks a lot better than just having rounds.

I love these elegan/tg/ourmand threads. Please, /ck/, stay for a little longer.

Well, I DM'd two sessions there for a while.
For Monday nights we used to do more of the throw together. We'd make a pot of chili, they'd bring chips and cheese, sodas, etc. That campaign no longer runs.

Now, my Tuesday and current group outdoes itself almost weekly. We all pitch in just a few bucks after we play for the next weeks meal. My girlfriend plays with us, and being from Japan, most the guys want rice balls, mabutofu, udon, etc.

We all decided about a year into play D&D was our favorite night of every week and started splurging. We drink good craft beers, buy more expensive smokes and weed, and so on.

We have gone out to buffets (and yes, played there), but my favorite so far was our druids birthday party. We had a Thanksgiving potluck with ALL the fixings, plus blackberry wine, some harder drinks.

It makes playing D&D feel like going to watch football, and I love it.

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Wow this thread really took off. I left for game night with a bunch of game dev friends of mine and came back only to realise the computer was still on and the thread had exploded (more or less at least).

Awesome. Also, im not really /ck/ at all - I havent been on that board since the first time I was there and the first thread was a 200 post thread about people praising OP for making dinner with ketchup in his minced meat sauce.

Anyway If anyone is still here, have a pic of my home made lime/lemon sorbet.

Also, if anyone wants suggestions for what to make for dinner, Im up for giving ideas. Last time I did this, I taught some guy to make egg fried rice which apparantly turned out really well so yay I guess

>>27865920
Thanks. I just find it more interesting to eat deliciously looking food. I once heard someone say that in japan, 50% of the food experience is the taste and the other 50% is the presentation. Im not kawaii and I dont give two shits about asia in general but I kinda like that one idea and I honestly appreciate food more when it looks good so I guess that´s why I do it. You should really try it yourself too. Make it look a little nice.

Also, small bowls for sauce means you can dip the stuff you want sauce on and leave the rest un-sauced and that you use far less sauce which means you dont get as fat - that, and it looks great when serving the food. Its win win really

>>27866301
I'm looking to expand my list. You appear competent.

Here's my scenario: 1 week of campsite cooking, 1 or 2 pots at most, only 1 of them is large, wood fire so either incandescent heat or low simmer, only essential kitchenware (few bowls, cutting board, knifes, sieve, whisk). Has to contain noticeable meat, poultry, or fish. Has to keep for a night, cant burn easily.

So far all I have is stew, chili, curry, and fricassee >>27863052

Any ideas?

>>27864393
Cool to know! Perhaps I should make my threats about the cooking book a real thing then. Understand that it wont be specifically dedicated to /tg/ on the cover because if I am to have a successful kickstarter, I need it to have a little broader appeal but I will most definatly describe how to make stuff from the very basics.

Hell as long as you can cook potato, make raw-fried potatos, baked potatos, hasselback potatos and mash potatos you are already half way there and it doesnt really get any simpler than preparing a potato.

I could also add tips for the lazy ones out there. Personally I havent peeled a potato for 2 years because I got myself an electric potato peeler and it saves a ton of time

>>27864379
Sounds tempting but I think my wife would sort of mind unfortunately

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>>27866406
>You appear competent.
Thanks... I guess?

Beouf Borgognion. Its amazing for when you have lots of time - I usually let mine simmer for 4-6 hours and even longer if I can get away with it.

1: Fry some bacon crisp and remove from pot, savig it for later. (Optional: remove bacon fat)
2: Fry some 5×5cm (2×2 inch) pieces of beef. Be reasonable with the beef.
3: Fry some chopped garlic and onion in the same pot in some olive oil.
4: Add some cheap red wine until it covers plus another few cm/~1inch
5: Quickly add basil, thyme, chopped carrots (I prefer the pieces relatively small but different strokes and all that) and ~half a handful of chopped root parsley (the white stuff you can buy. Its a root, not the green parsley leaves) and put the lid on. Faster is better
6: let cook for at least an hour, preferably more AND DO NOT OPEN THE LID! You want the alcohol from the wine to make the meat super delicious and tender but dont be an ass about it either. Use common judgement compared to the amount of wine you have in there.
Half an hour before eating, remove the lid, add a few cans of chopped tomatos, some paprika, some ground chili, ~5 grams of as dark chocolate as you can get (trust me on this) and mushrooms if you are into those sort of thing. Im personally not but hey.

In the other pot you make mashed potatos. Cook the fuck out of a bunch of potatos (smaller pieces are faster) with a bunch of veggie boulion - not salt , drain the water (but keep it for now), add some butter, mash the fuck out of the potatos, add some nutmeg, stir forcefully, adding the water back in a little at a time until you get the desired consistency.

You can use a little starch for the sauce if you want to - some prefer it thin, others dont. I prefer it somewhere in the middle.

oh and make sure to taste your food before serving but not until you think it is done. Redwine sauce tastes horribly until it has cooked for a while

Pic of it is there >>27860940

>>27866714
Cool. Thanks. Will try.

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>>27866714
You can also make fruit leather if you are feeling up for awesome smelling mideval candy. It looks wierd but tastes absolutely delicious.

First take an iron place and place it in the sun (I assume you play in the summer?) where it will get really fucking hot.

Next cut the seeds from a bunch of apples (6 per large oven pan... ish), cut them in small pieces and into a pot with a tiny bit of water (like half a cup or something) where they will dissolve into apple porrage. Add cinnamon, lime and honey until you like the taste and make sure it has cooked at least 20 minutes (preferably more).

Smear it over the iron plate in ~half a centimeter thick layer (or 1/4 inch) and wait. You need to start this in the morning because it will take a while but eventually after 10-12 hours of super delicious smell which will attract a horde of guests, you will have a dehydrated version of the porrage. Rip it in small lines and you have some great candy which is even authentic for the middle ages.

You can use any kind of fruit to make this btw and you can even make it in your oven at home if you use it at 50 degrees celcius and the hot air setting. It takes ~12 hours and keeps fresh for at least a year if you keep it air tight and not too hot.

Pic related, I made this from raspberries and a single apple to give it texture and it was super delicious. I have a large stock I intent to bring to the next larping event I attend and sell it there

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>>27866843
And here is the other side except this was an all apple version

>>27866762
You´re welcome. I hope you like it.

Other winners are small skin/boneless pieces of chicken, fried in a little oil with added rosemary and a generous amount of limejuice. Let it get some color before adding the juice and then let the juice reduce for amazingly tastey pieces of chicken. Serve with rice or whatever you feel like serving chicken with

>>27866843
That is awesome!

>>27866301
there's a really simple dessert you can do by just combining berries, goat cheese and honey. you could eat it straight up, or use it as a spread on cookies, puff pastry or sweet biscuits. you could also top it with some shaved dark chocolate, or a sweet balsamic sauce.

one thing i've done that goes over pretty well is fish tacos. you use any firm whitefish, and grill it (healthier than batter/deep fry). then serve it up with warmed corn tortillas, shredded radicchio, chopped onions, cilantro, a chipotle sour cream and a few wedges of lime.

>>27866843
>ext cut the seeds from a bunch of apples (6 per large oven pan... ish), cut them in small pieces and into a pot with a tiny bit of water

Do you use the seeds or the apple itself for this? I'd assume the apple, but the way you write this, it looks like you're talking about the seeds.

>>27866939
On that vein, there's another tasty treat for hot summer days.

Take firm, plain yoghurt (sold as greek or turkish yoghurt over here), add a little liquid honey, some mint leaves and some bits of crushed hazelnuts or almonds if you have. Stir and eat with spoon.

Absolutely delicious.

>>27866971
Ah sorry yes you are right and Im an ass. I dispose of the seeds. Only the meat of the apple is used. If you want to peel the apples or not is up to you. Some like the texture, some prefer it more plain but i guess its the same discussion as with peanutbutter.

Btw, if you make it at home, I strongly suggest that you use a hand blender instead of just mashing it up because it makes it much smoother

>>27866714
everybody should learn how to make this dish. it takes very little effort, and has a very great appeal. same goes for similar dishes, like coq au vin.

>>27867009
Sounds delicious. My wife really likes eating that stuff at the moment. Im personally not big on nuts but she really enjoys it. She uses a kind of youghurt called Skyr which is very very high on protine (10% I think) and super low on fat (0.2%) and a very liquid honey. She eats it for breakfast sometimes.

If you want it to look nice, you can put it on a small plate, smear it out in a ~2cm layer, sprinkle honey but dont mix it and then sprinkle small pieces of walnuts all over the place

>>27867170
or use it to make lassi. mix the yogurt with mango, sugar/honey, and milk.

>>27867153
Saved. Thanks for sharing. That looks super interesting. I would love to be able to dry out potatos

My players happen to be the people I live with, and I cook for them once or twice a week.
However, I don't cook on game nights, possibly because I don't want anyone eating around my stuff.

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>>27866843
>It looks wierd but tastes absolutely delicious.
important question: can we make it look like more disgusting? Because there are two kind of things I make at larps: delicious looking stuff that makes you vomit if you taste it and stuff that tastes delicious but the look if it makes you vomit... or so am I told

>>27867797
Sure, just add long strings of un-blended potato for instance to make it look like tried up worms. It shouldnt be a problem but I guess you would have to keep it strictly apple in that case.

Thus far my storage is made from
Apple/Ginger
Apple/Cinnamon
Raspberry/apple
Banana
Banana/apple
Grape (fucking 10/10 God Tier delicious but its one hell of a ton of work to make)
Orange/Banana
Peach/Cherry/Apple/Plum/Banana mix
Cherry/Apple
Strawberry
Strawberry/Apple

>>27860626
Bragg is that you?

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>>27867898
Nope, im from scandinavia. But have a bunch of pancakes!

>>27867919
ah well, thought you were a foodie fa/tg/uy I know. Thanks for the thread anyway, shit looks delicious

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>>27867896
that's a wonderful idea! I will totally use it next time. Maybe with a few drops of food color

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For when you want everyone in your gaming group to die within a few hours, but don't want to be charged with a crime.

>>27867964
That looks pretty disgusting. What is it?

Also, I meant apple strings - not potato strings sorry about that.

Or you can leave a few plump pieces of stuff which looks wierd in the mix. A peeled cherry looks really wierd and its easy to do if you just cut it in half. People think cherries are red inside but in reality they are more like flesh colored so I guess you could make what looks like a hide of flesh if you wanted to - add a few well placed halved cherries to make them look like boils (and they will actually remain more soft than the rest of the leather piece because they are thicker and retain liquid better) and you should have a winner. If you also go around talking about that plague victem you skinned or something, it should be a definate success!

>>27866714
Doh its called Horseradish and NOT parsley. The words just seem alike in my language, hence the mixup. My bad

>>27868025
I almost got a heart attack just looking at that.

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>>27868052
sour cream and canned tomato herring mixed together and a little green food color

Stews are the ultimate game night food.
1. Stews are incredibly easy to make.
2. Stews are relatively cheap to make.
3. Stews are delicious.
4. You can start up the stew before you begin gaming, and it will cook while you game.
5. While cooking it will fill your house with delicious aromas.

I feed my group pure RAGEHAET.

TPKing is fun

>>27868134
Sour cream and tomato go well together? I never knew that.

>>27868184
6. Stews won't get your hands messy.

>>27868219
7. It's really fucking hard to ruin a stew. As it is to perfect one.
8. Even Tolkien mentioned it.

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>>27868184
Fried rice is pretty excellent as well. You can make a nearly infinite amount for a few dollars, it's quick and easy to make, and is fucking delicious.

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>>27868134

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>>27868198
everything go well with sour cream (although I'm not sure it's sour cream but who am I to argue with googel translate?) Also the tomato is just some tomato sauce or something that was part of the canned herring so it's not like it's real tomato.

Also another little something, this one is sausage slices and spaghetti... whatevers

>>27868184
Friend of mine once said "There's no better air freshener than home cooking"

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>>27868260

>>27868134
My asperger's syndrome refuses to let me eat that.

>>27868260
>not arguing with Google Translate
As you are Hungarian, the actual translation for every food you mention is "chili pepper".

>>27868296
As does my choke reflex...

But only because I despise canned fish in tomato sauce.

Does anybody have a recepie for meatbread that's actually good and also won't kill you through acute cholesterol poisoning?

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>>27868336
nah, that's not a real food. That's just some fundamental thing. Like water

>>27868363
It's called a sandwich.

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>>27868383

>>27868383
You can't just keep posting pictures of weird shit in a pan without telling us what it is.

>>27868363
Use puff pastry to wrap your meat and put lots of veggies into it.

>>27868417
Did somebody already eat that?

>>27868452
we ate from it but didn't put back anything if you ask that

>>27868434
well it's basically oat-flakes in boiling water, plus some eggs and bacon

>>27861197
LOL, I hear you. Back in the 80's, the common etiquette was that the GM would provide the game, someone (often the GM) would provide the place to play, and the others would provide the munchies.

>>27868363
Make some standard wheat dough (½ liter water lukewarm water, add a teaspoon or two of salt depending on your temper, add 25 grams of yeast and make sure it is dissolved, stir and add a good cup or two of oat meal along with 2-3 table spoons of olive oil. Wait 10 minutes and add flour. Stir the dough as you add more flour. When you cant stir any more, place some cloth over it, let it rise for an hour, put some flour on the table, pour the dough on the flour and work the dough, adding more flour if nessecary.)

Fry some garlic, onion and minced beef, add a cube or two of beef boullion (not dissolved just crush the cube with your fingers), some concentrated tomato OR a good splash of salsa to the mix, add any veggies you want (FINELY chopped). Protip: To save on meat, use some lefover rice from the day before.

Roll out your batter, spread meat mix and roll the batter into a.. well... roll. Chop in squares, make them flat in whatever way you want, paint with whisked egg or milk or water and put into the oven at 180 degrees for ~7-13 minutes depending on the thickness.

Protip: Try one before you take them all out

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and this one is oat-flakes but with home-made jam. Sometimes we put pineapples in it too

>>27860669
>Do you even food

I laughed way too hard at that.

>>27868607
If you want a porrage which looks disgusting yet tastes amazing you should try boiling a little water, add oatmeal and a little wheat flour along with a little salt and a few table spoons of sugar.

Let it thicken a bit, adding more oat meal or flour if you want it thicker. Then add almonds, raisins, cocoa power (not the shitty blended crap - just real faw cocoa powder) and cinnamon.

It looks truly disgusting and a little like vomit but fuck me if its not awesome and delicious. It gives you such an energy boost you´d think I was shitting you.

>we /ck/ now

>>27868696
Yeah, talking about practical food and how to make other food look like vomit without comprimising on taste sure sounds like /ck/

>>27868696
I'm more than okay with this.

>>27868198
Have you never had a taco?

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>>27868675
I know that you are not shitting me. basically every oatmeal stuff is good, delicious and gives you energy boost. Also 99% of them looks disgusting, it's just the question of personal preference of what kind of disgusting you want. And again: food color can do wonders in the visual-terrorism department.

Also here is another pic, I have nothing to do with it, sadly

>>27868675
Oh yeah you can also add hazelnut to the mix along with pieces of apple and some honey. It is all just variants on the same recipe obviously.

>>27868696
>now
http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/930585/

>>27868742
Yeah I know but using the cocoa really makes wonders happen with that, both from a taste perspective but also from a "you look like you have an ulcer and then vomited" perspective

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>>27868782
in my experience the home made apricots jam better for it (and when I said peach before I meant apricots). I mean not the from the shop shit but the good old home made one which is technically a liquid but with bigger and smaller parts of apricot fiber.

Now what's really hard on the other hand is making something that looks good and shit it up so much that you want to vomit from it. I did this only with potions because if you can make a potion that doesn't smells bad but tastes like shit then you can pour it on anything and everything... one of the reasons why I'm not allowed unsupervised near to any water source or food...

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More and more I find my group conveniently forgetting to have breakfast before coming to D&D.

>>27868876
10/10 potion would drink and instantly regret it

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The other week we had a great thread about making alcoholic beverages for a LARP.

Any ideas beyond mead and cider?

>>27860626
>>27860640
Meatballs made with fish is common in Norway. It is called Fiskekaker or Fishcakes. And you are correct it is truly delicious.

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>>27868901
That is some horrible bruschetta my friend.

You oil and bake or fry the sliced bread by itself, then you rub fresh garlic on it, then comes the tomato basil salsa.

>>27868741
what kind of stupid inbred cunt puts tomatos or sour cream on a taco? jesus christ i have never heard of anything as terrible as putting either of those things in a taco. i am legitimatly disgusted by such a foul thought

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>>27868910
>and instantly regret it
fun fact: you don't have to drink it, just open it. I make exploding potions too

>>27868926
Beer was always popular with the working men and women of history, even 5,000 years ago.

>>27868934
I always just put Asian fish paste into my pork+beef meatballs.

>>27868926
Wine. Wine wine wine. And also wine.

It is awesome, tastes great, gets you a plesant warm kind of drunk and is fantastic in food. Wine, All day erry day.

I have a few mates I usually to to a larping event with once per year where we always play a wine merchant family. We always spice it up with different relations and characters obviously but we also always make sure we will play a cosy kind of game and just drink wine all day while selling the less good stuff to other players (for real money so we dont have a massive hit on our personal economy ofc as well as for ingame money). One guy loves political play so he always tries to get us in with the local authorities by bribing them with wine, I love spying so I always happen to end up in the wierdest of places and two guys who always play brothers love playing our muscle so they spend all day on the tavern.

And naturally I cook if the others voulenteer to do the dishes and peel potatos. Fuck I hate peeling potatos...

>>27869011
Also, obviously its a great excuse to be slightly drunk all day for a week and spending time singing bad songs on the tavern in the evenings. Fuck I love that week

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>>27869011
also: honey-wine basically it's the wine equivalent of mead

>>27869011
We're a merchant guild. So we need strong shots to get customers into a spending mood and celebrate done deals.

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>>27869068
aaand... that wasn't the pic I posted...

>>27868992
WTF did you fill it with shit!?

>>27869087
4chan does that, substitute random images under your filename...

>>27868926
Some good liquor. Armangnac is very old, and a medieval bishop supposedly attributed healing qualities to it, so that's a good one. Whisky as well.

>>27869068
Never tried that but I do make a mean honey schnapps. I got the recipe from my grand father and I am pretty damn good at making it now.

Basically take a 2 liters bottle, pour 1½ liters of schnapps in in along with 250grams of good honey and 5 pieces of anis. Shake very very well (or mix the schnapps and honey in a bowl and add anis when you pour it in the bottle). That is it. It has to stand for at least 3 weeks and you should shake it a little every day until its done (I just turn it on its head and then back again). Also, remove the anis after 3-4 days unless you want it very anis-y.

If you do it right it smells and tastes absolutely amazing. I really dont like schnapps at all and I know very few people who do - but I still dont know anyone who doesnt absolutely love this schnapps.

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>>27869093
remember when I said that I make either disgusting looking but delicious stuff or delicious looking stuff that is disgusting?
Truth to be told sometimes I make disgusting looking stuff which is... well, disgusting.
But that stuff was basically had too much green and red food color so it became that brownish stuff. It had cinnamon and hot sauce in it and sodium bicarbonate (hence the exploding part, put it in, seal the vial fast, then shake it and hand wait for someone who tries to open it. obviously you need a sealable vial for this)
Plus a dozen of various aromas I can't remember

>>27869131
Too costly. There's hundreds of thirsty people at that event...

>>27869165
so you put hot sauce in something that is going to blow up in people's faces? are you a BBEG?

>>27869131
Making liquor is fucking difficult, doubly so if you care how it tastes.

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>>27869193
I'm not just give it to them simply. I mean I made it with hard work after all!
I sell it to them. And not for cheap either.
Also sometimes it's called "healing potion" may or may not with actual rules-wise healing effects

>>27869237
so not only are you making stuff that might explode hot sauce into the eyes of people, you are also hustling money from them at the same time?

>>27869237
You always have the best LARP pics!

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>>27869281
yeah, but it's for the sake of SCIENCE!

Although there was one guy once who didn't know what kind of things I make and saw a packet of powder I hade and thought it's some kind of candy stuff or something and asked if he can have a little.
I being a friendly person of course gave him the whole packet. It was one of my pre-prepared powders so that I just have to add water to it and BAM instant disgusting stuff with a fuckton powdered chilly, pepper and fizzy tablets (with added C vitamin, because I care)
Later I was killed by the same guy but I still think it's totally worth it to see him agonizing for half an hour

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but we are getting sidetracked and I should have gone to sleep two hours ago, so I go now.
Here is a pic of home made bread and other baked goods

>>27869420
ahhh, so justice was served. I bet you became his arch nemesis or something.

>>27864713
You nihilistic fuck.

>>27869533
What did you use for the one on the left? Looks delicious.

>>27869533
I'd put a loaf in their ovens, if you know what i mean.

>>27869599
Yeah I´d totally loan their kitchen to make food in, perhaps prepare some nice bruschetta and have a great meal with my wife if you...

wait what were we talking about again? Anyway, I need some sleep I guess. Im supposed to get in 4½ hours which kind of sucks.

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>>27869599
they sure raise my dough, if you know what I mean.

>>27861894
>Would it be remotely worth the while?
Absolutely. I'm so sick of pizza every week, and this stuff sounds amazing

I hope they don't have a yeast infection, if you know what I mean.

>tfw bitch ass food intolerances, can't eat half the stuff gamer fuel guy makes
Live the dream, my friends, for I cannot

>>27869851
before I head to bed, which intolerances are those? I may have something you can make if its not too wide spectred. Im heading to bed in 5 minutes though

>>27869890
Wheat, Soy and Dairy, I make a lot of plain poultry dishes

>>27860933
Where are you. I would totally come over to your house and eat your food, I mean play your games.

>>27867919
oh god, my childhood. my grandma makes those, and serves them with lingonberries and whipped cream. she's swedish/norweigan 1st generation american. i have the cast iron skillet her swedish mother got over 100 years ago. heirloom cooking implements.

>>27869929
Well that is silly. Try egg fried rice and exchange the soy for some water and salt (or even better: use boullion of your favourite kind instead!), beef borgognion (as explained in this thread), salads in the thousands like in >>27862680, you can roast a pork filet in a large pot, add onion, garlic and rosemary and cover it all in red wine, add a few cubes of pork boullion and a few potatos to the mix.

Boil some more potatos on the side, after an hour or so, take up the meat, blend the sauce with the potatos you cooked in it well to make it thicker if you like and enjoy a grand meal. The pork will be super delicious I promise.

I have a ton of recipies without wheat because I always ever use potatos to make my sauce thicker (just boil potatos in the water you make your sauce from and blend them with a hand blender - make sure you cut the potatos as small as you bother first because they cook badly in sauce as compared to normal water and I have no idea why)

You just need to avoid diary, pasta, bread and the likes but you can easily eat potatos or rice for instance and as long as you know how to make sauce without flour, there is no reason you cant make glorious red wine sauces for instance.

>>27868926
stouts. with lemon.

like what fatty fat king baratheon drank in GoT.

>>27870075
I feel it man, to be honest I don't have a lot of practice cooking, though It's something I need to get into. Thanks for the recipe

>>27870075
Also, spices and boullion. Use it. A lot.

I never salt my food if I can add boullion. Its a little more expensive but it really lifts up everything and I cant remember the last time I didnt make a sauce which wasnt basically just onion, garlic, potatos, water/wine and boullion and just finished off by blending it. It can be reheated, frozen or whatever you want - just make sure to blend it again after you thaw it if you freeze it because otherwise the texture will be a bit strange but other than that you will feel no difference what so ever.

>>27868934
or fiskebullar.

>>27870141
Practice makes perfect my friend. And once you learn a few good recipies, start experimenting. If something smells like it would be great in that dish, try adding it.

super dark chocolate is great in anything with chili in if you only use it very sparingsly (like 2-5 grams of chocolate). This is basically the only thing you probably wont just stumble across on your way, but other than that there is no other secret.

I admit I become a little obsessed when trying new dishes. I usually find something I think sounds interesting, check 5 different recipies of it on google, take whatever is in common in those recipies and then what I feel like from the ones which are not similar to the others and from there I experiment and try the same dish but with small variants a lot of times. Probably up towards every 3 days or something. Once I get it just right, for some reason I stop making it for at least a few months - no idea why but I guess its because it stopped being interesting.

But yeah, practice and dont be afraid to try new stuff. Just get your fundamentals right and you are off to a flying start. Also boullion and spices. Always

>>27868025
made one of these last week. not for a group, just for me. Really good, but I used less sauce than recommended and regretted it.

>>27870232
Good advice, I appreciate it and I'll save it for later. I had forgotten about boullion, that'll be a nice addition

>>27870304
You are welcome.

And good night /tg/ it was nice to have such an awesome thread.

>>27868025
I've done one up at a dnd session. We did a fry night, I have a small deep fryer and we arranged it so everyone brought stuff they wanted to fry, we made several batters had it freshly filled before people showed up and changed the oil twice that night.

We had all the general stuff:
mushrooms, cheese, onions, green beans, chicken, taquitos, potatoes, hush puppies, hotpocket

and then some odder stuff:
twinkie, snowball, snickers, pickels, stuffing (which was really damn good dipped in gravy)

Everyone there felt like crap after eating that night if we had gone any farther we probably would have all croaked. We haven't used the fryer since and that was almost two years ago.

>>27868710
>implying its not

Carrot, celery, and olive plate with dip/dressing in the middle.

Pizza if everyone pitches in.

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What is all this fancy chef-porn bullshit? Pepperoni pizza and colt 45 malt liquor is all my gaming group needs.

>>27873146
none of these dishes are really that complicated, and you are a pleb for thinking they are. they're plated well, though are very unpretentious.

>>27874421
Anything past a paper plate or microwave safe tupperware is fancy.

>>27874706
I take offense to this as I am a malt liquor connoisseur.

Old English and a dab of orange juice every time.

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>>27874706
Enjoy your greasy processed foodlike products.

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>>27873146

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I'd like to make one of these for a game night someday.

Latkes, nothing but latkes. Zucchini latkes, pumpkin latkes, spiny latkes, cheesy latkes, sweet potato latkes, latkes and chicken sandwiches, pizza latkes

It's all I can make. I have lived for the past five years eating mostly latkes.

Anyone here remember about... three years ago, I think, when someone said they were going to make a chili-cheese meatbread Gigantor for New Year's? Did he ever post the results?

>>27860626
Usually we just get chinese. Shit's delicious.

However, were I to cook, it would either be kedgeree, or X and chips.
Kedgeree is an old british recipe. Smoked haddock, boiled rice, and hard-boiled egg all mixed together. Delicious, fairly simple to cook if you get the timings right, and GREAT for cold winter nights. It's tasty, hot, nutritious, and you can just shovel it in with a fork.

X and chips is basically whatever I have on hand, cooked up and served with chips. Proper chips, not what you americans call crisps. Either something like fish fingers or turkey drummers or fried egg, or the like.
If I have eggs and a bunch of leftovers, I make omelette, because those are delicious too. Eggs, a splash of milk, and sliced-up bits of whatever.

I also bake. So, snackfood can be provided in the form of chocolate muffins, or maybe a cake if I feel like crafting something. But muffins are piss-easy to make from the recipe.

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We all just usually go to McDonalds.

We had cooked chicken once, though.

>>27868025
> worchschire sauce
> WORCESTERSHIRE
> IT EVEN SAYS IT ON THE FUCKING BOTTLE
> IT'S A FUCKING PLACE FOR FUCK'S SAKE
> Fucking yanks...

>>27878982
Yes, but how do you pronounce Worchestershire?

Because here we say Woster

>>27878982
Which came first, the sauce or the place?

Or is it like a chicken and the egg thing?

>>27869002
Note, that was ALE. Not piss-tasting lager that comes in cans. So, you'll probably have to find some real ales for the occasion.

>>27868926
Spiced wine. Take half-decent wine. Add spices. Heat or chill. Serve.

>>27879015
What spices? Cinnamon?

>>27879003
Woostersheer.
But I'm sure part of that's my accent. 'Shire' isn't really meant to rhyme with 'sheer'. Strictly meant to by 'shy-er', but I'm from berkshire. So fuck pronunciation and posh accents, bruv. Innit.

>>27879013
The place. Sauce was invented there by accident.

>>27879026
I would use cinnamon, cardamom, aniseed, cloves, and orange peel.

But I am somebody entire different.

>>27878306
pretty sure in a keto diet this is allowed..you need to get rid of the pizza though

>>27879026
I don't really know, don't drink the stuff. But I'd think cinnamon, maybe some cloves, maybe some paprika.
I'd experiment with glass-fulls first, to check different blends.

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>>27879042
>'Shire' isn't really meant to rhyme with 'sheer
AND YOU BETTER KNOW IT!

>>27879003
Wurr-sturr-shurr

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No complaints thus far

>>27879042
Bruv. Bruv. Innit

>>27879353
Dat sum toothpaste-dog?

>>27879361
You disrespecting me?
I'm not bovered.
You disrespecting me?

>>27879384
YES ANON!

You see dat football game? Yer. Tottenham! Innit bruv!

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>>27879374

Pan fried burgers or the occasional $2.00 steak on sale

Thankfully this isnt often

>>27879003
its woo-ster-sheer in almost every accent

>>27879437
kys bad kitchen

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So how would you make a rat burger?

From medieval cities to space stations, the rat burger is a staple in fiction. It sounds disgusting but tastes great, that's the trope. What's the recipe?

I would start with a mix of minced, ground, and diced beef and pork.
A few strips of sliced pork belly for that pork skin/rat innards texture.
A hand full of dried basmati for some crunch.
Fish sauce for a slightly rancid odor.
Garlic for those sulfuric aromas.
Diced mushrooms for chewiness.
Half a large onion cut along the stem but only to the center and then sliced across for tails and guts.
Chili, cardamom, turmeric, coriander, salt, and a little sugar because it's street meat.

Whadayathink?

>>27879834
Maybe something a little gamy in the mix? Rabbit instead of beef? Deer?

>>27879834

I say fuck you are your pompous as fuck recipe. Go to a local pet store, buy a bunch of fucking rats, butcher them and make the burger out of pure rat meat with a little salt and pepper for seasoning. Jesus Christ it's not fucking rocket surgery.

>>27879973
Kill them humanely, bite their heads off.

Every rat deserves an end worth of mention.

>>27879973
>pet store
That's not street meat!
Catch your own sewer rats you newb!

>>27879965
I'd say rabbit; venison is expensive.

>>27879834
It's meant to smell great too, though. I don't see why it has to be anything other than a burger obviously made from a small animal. Hence the rabbit.

Otherwise, if you want yer authentic ratburger, you gotta get rats. One will get you a couple of 1/4lb burgers, plus a little left over. Either set up snares and traps, or go to yer local rat-catcher or farmer. Farmed rat is expensive, but good fer a fancy burger.
Skin, butcher, and gut the rats. Chuck the meat through the mincer. Don't worry about the little bones, you barely notice them. Add a little fat; you can get it in slabs from the large-animal butchers cheap. If you don't want to know where it's from, it's REALLY cheap.
Salt, a little pepper (not too much, they're a little spicy around these parts to begin with). Then comes the magic. After making twice as many burgers as you had rats, you take the excess meat and make chili. That's my secret recipe, though, especially the sauce, so I ain't telling you that.
Fry the burgers up. Slap some cheese on top.
Yes, cheese. Goat's cheese. What, you think it'd be rat cheese? You disgust me. And it's impractical as hell. Ever tried to find a rat's nipples, let alone milk them? Sheesh.
Then you stick it onto the bottom of the bun, and add the chili over the top. Stick the top bun on, and serve.

>>27880172
You don't milk the mother's teets, you milk the babies' stomachs.

>>27880201
Yep. Grossed out myself a little bit there. Had to put my jerky down.

>>27880215
It's rat baby jerky

>>27880201
Goats are still easier. Less ornery, too.

Not quite as hardy as the pigs, though. Local mob boss keeps a bunch of them, feeds 'em solely on snitches, fuckups, and rich cunts.
Them's some fat pigs.

>>27880277
What's that? You say pigs need vegetables too?

Yeah, he accounts for that. Stuffs the victims full of vegetables first. Literally full.

>>27880292
Forced fed pellet fodder until you suffocate, then fed to animals, then pooped out....

Should we get back to actual cooking?

>>27880327
You don't know terror until you've heard someone drown in hot vegetable soup...

But yeah, actual cooking, and not writefaggotry.

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>>27880350
> Oi! Keep your fingers out of my soup!

For some reason I've been lucky enough to have been in two groups where the DMs girlfriend decides to cook puddings for us. Crumbles and fruit pie and this really nice Hungarian Bread & Butter pudding with a shit tonne of poppy seeds in it.

Normally everyone brings a selection of crisps & sweets anyway and recently we've been getting pizzas and Chinese or Indian snack boxes from Iceland. Less classy but it feeds us on the cheap.

No photos, but one thing I really like is sticking chicken, vegetables and chopped ginger in a ball of tin foil, adding some apple juice, and sticking it in the oven. Veggies come out beautifully steamed, chicken cooks nicely, the apple and ginger make it tasty, and it's basically single-serving pouches which make it really easy to customise to tastes and leave one in the warm oven if someone's a little late.

>>27880552
Take a whole chicken, stick everything inside > oven (takes a bit longer to heat through, start with slow heat at first).

You cannot beat roast chicken. That crispy skin fries itself perfectly.

>>27880597
If you're doing a proper roast chicken, do it with proper roast potatoes.

Take a fuckload of potatoes. I use Maris Pipers, they're not necessarily the best but they're damn good for this. Peel, chop into even but fairly large chunks. Boil/simmer them for ten minutes. Drain, hold the lid on the pan, bash around until they're all fluffy and fucked up. Remove heavy tray with hot goose fat (duck fat, oil, whatever, but goose tastes best and it's still fairly cheap) from oven. Roll them around on it to get them more or less coated, optionally put chopped (1cm or larger cubes) whole lemon scattered over the pile of potatoes, roast for 40-50 minutes. Turn occasionally.

Realise you should have cooked more because they're incredible, resolve to cook the entire bag next time however much it looks like you're preparing too many.

Serve with properly roast beef or chicken, appropriate gravy, and other vegetables I guess.

>>27880634
greased carbs
>other vegetables
>other

Sounds great.

After reading this thread, it's no wonder all of you guys ARE SO FUCKING FAT!!!

>>27880665
You don't use much, and I wasn't counting potatoes as vegetables - I was thinking of your basic roast dinner set and then thinking "well, add other stuff". I'm not here to talk you through a proper roast dinner, just the taters.

>>27880680
And they do sound great.

I will try smashing and tearing them half cooked instead of cutting them raw. Seems like they'd absorb more juices (I put them in the same dish as the meat usually).

>>27880719
You can put them in with the meat, but if you're doing beef you want it out of the oven a good 15-20 minutes before the potatoes (and the rest of the meal) are ready.

You don't have to fluff them up too much - and yes, apparently that is the right verb - but the more you do it, the better the crunch. They'll be OK if you just shake them a little. Test them before shaking by running a knife along the potato - if you get a smooth, tight cut they might need a bit longer.

>>27868134
>sour cream and tomato herring mixed together
>mixed
that is not mixed, faggot. It has to come out in a pinkish color.

>>27880634
King Edwards are the best, but Maris Pipers are nearly up there, and FAR more reliable, quality-wise. Much less tendency to rot in the bag.
Also, you forgot the chipolata sausages wrapped in bacon.

>>27880597
Sure you can. Roast turkey, or roast beef. Hnnnng roast beef.
Also, hnnng xmas turkey. Literally, that is the only good thing about the festive season. That fucking turkey. One meal of it hot, eating as much as you can. Then another of it served cold, with cold stuffing and more vegetables and stuff done as well. Then whatever remains is eaten in sandwiches for a few days.

The absolute best breakfast on boxing day is a turkey sandwich, with sausagemeat, stuffing, smoked salmon, and chipolatas.