Archive: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive.html?tags=Harry%20Potter%20Nasuverse%20QuestTwitter: https://twitter.com/HPNasuQuest=====You are Harry James Potter, and you just killed a man.To be fair, he was trying to kill Illya. Well, at least, you are under the assumption that since he was a deranged and murdering psychopath who tried to kill -you-, Illya would have been next on his list of "people who I'm going to kill today." It's a good thing he only tried using the Avada Kedavra on you, as trying to kill The Death of Things with a spell that imposes Death doesn't exactly work.The Aurors - or rather, Auror - have arrived, unfortunately too late to do anything particularly useful. You suppose Mr. Kiritsugu's low regard for Law Enforcement response times applies to Wizards as well. Tonks is giving the sole Auror to arrive on the scene goo-goo eyes; apparently, this Regulus Black fellow is highly decorated, and something of a national hero.Personally, you think Professor Snape is more competent, though your vision may be colored by the fact that he didn't die when he was killed. At the moment, you personally feel the compartment that you're in is getting a little corpsy. It takes a bit to convince Regulus, but between your word, Illya's word, Snape's word, Neville's silence and an impassioned speech by Tonks about how she dreamed to follow in Regulus' footsteps, you manage to pass the buck onto Tonks and get away from that eyesore sickening feeling drilling away at your stomach. Ron eventually takes the three of you to a trolly occupied by two of his older brothers, and one of their friends. You suspect that said brother's aren't named Gred and Forge, but you've heard less likely names coming from Magi, so you'll take them at face value for now. The two of them, and Lee, seem to be a pretty swell pair of blokes.>Field too long.
>>27014512On the way there, you stopped at the trolly, to grab some sweets in celebration of not dying. You get yourself...>A pack of Berty Botts Every Flavored Beans.>A container of chocolate frogs.>A couple of Licorice Wands.>A bag of pepper imps.>[OTHER]
Harry James Potter[ATTRIBUTES] Strength - D+ "You're a wiry lad, built for speed more than strength." Agility - A "You're fast on your feet and quick with your reflexes" Endurance - C+ "You're cousin's made sure you can take a beating." Intelligence - B+ "You're no genius, but you're smarter than most." Luck - B "You've got better luck than most." Circuit Quality (CQ) - A [13 Prana per Circuit] Circuit Quantity (CC) - B+ [26 Circuits, one of which has been opened]Magic Circuits Open - 4/26Prana Available - 52/52Wounds - 0/6[SKILLRATINGS] Academics (Mundane) [INT] - D Academics (Magecraft) [INT] - E+[9 (11)] Academics (Wizarding) [INT] - E (D) Acrobatics [AGI] - D+ Athletics [END] - D+ Capioera [AGI] - D+ Cooking [AGI] - D+ Craft (Mystic Codes) [INT] - E+ Discernment - D Mystic Eye Lore [LCK] - D Origin Magic [CQ] - E Reinforcement [CQ] - E+ Stealth [AGI] - D Wandlore [CQ] - F[TRAITS]Spiteful - Your stealth rating increases by 2 when you're out for revenge.Compassionate - Your healing spells cure one additional wound.[PERKS]Devil's Luck - You may temporarily reduce your luck attribute by 1 step to negate a critical hit against you.Practiced Runner - Your Athletics rating is increased by 2 when running.Multitasker I - Multitasking penalties to skill checks are reduced by 1.Mystic Eyes of Death Perception - You see the Death of things, and deal additional wounds when using a knife.[LEAST] - You can discern the difference between lines of concepts and lines of objects, allowing you to choose which to cut.Mystic Eye Focus - You've grown accustomed to the use of your [MYSTIC EYES], and have unlocked it's [LEAST] secondary power.Parseltongue - You possess the ability to understand and speak the language spoken by snakes and certain other reptiles.True Magic Innoculation - Penalties for True Magic vs Sanity decrease by 2.??? - ???
Wand of Maple and Dryad - You heal one additional wound when using Wand Magic to heal.Spellcraft for Squibs - Up to rank B, add 1 rank to your Academics (Wizarding). Up to rank C, add 2 tanks.Changeling Spear - A spear that can take the form of a staff, a baton, a glaive, a boar spear, or a javelin.??? - A dagger that, apparently, only you can perceive.Mirror Phone - Your first mystic code, it is a clamshell mirror connected to a matching mirror you gave to Illya, allowing you to secretly communicate and stir up all kinds of ruckus.MARTIN MIGGS Omnibus - Increases Fun Rating to A+.
>>27014526>A pack of Berty Botts Every Flavored Beans.LIVIN' ON THE EDGE!
>>27014526>A pack of Berty Botts Every Flavored Beans.Its a Mystery Box in candy form. What other choice is there?
>>27014526>A pack of Berty Botts Every Flavored Beans.Because nothing says fun like vomit-flavored beans!Oh, and Threadly reminder that the updated Ebook can be found at http://pastebin.com/kbGzcbDb and will be updated after Friday's thread.
>>27014601>>27014645>>27014738Harry also mentioned their lines are pretty fucking trippy or something to that effect. I'm not quite sure the Eyes are supposed to work like that, but that's okay anyway.
>>27014512>A pack of Berty Botts Every Flavored Beans.>>27014790Maybe they'll be like magical LSD for us.
>>27014790I think thats because they were created with Wizardry. Unnatural stuff looks kinda screwy because it sees the object as well as the enchantments and shit, at least thats the way I understand it.
>>27014834>>27014839Either way I'm all for it. Screwing with Lines can only be a healthy outlet for our fragmented sanity.
>>27014526>[OTHER] Sour Snakes, snakes so sour that when you pucker your tongue and lips, you can speak squeeky Parseltongue.
>>27014790Neko arc probably made them or some one as silly, actualy beans that could be any flavor even ones that dont exist seems right up zeldriches alley
>>27014526choclate frogs, duh
You of course decide to grab a jumbo sized sack of Berty Botts Every Flavored Beans.You insist to yourself that you are doing this for purely scientific reasons, born of a fascination with the possibility of something that claims to have every possible flavor. Certainly not for some innane and shallow reason such as how they look under your gaze tainted by the visions of death. Though you will admit, taking a look at the bag over your Mystic Eye Killers, the lines of death on these things shift in such wonderful and interesting ways, painting your vision with a psychadelic spectrum of infinite possibility.Maybe that's the key behind their claim. Maybe these jelly beans, these jelly beans are an embodiment of infinity, directly connected with the Root!Or maybe you're just being silly."Berty Botts, huh?" Gred - you can tell by his lines - says. "Excellent choice, if you don't mind my opinion - those can be some of the most delightful candies you'll ever have.""Or some of the most disgusting," Forge pipes in. "I once got myself a bag where every bean was a different sort of rotten fish.""Bro, that's not sporting," Gred says. "You were supposed to wait until he got a garbage flavored one.""He's Harry Potter, bro," Forge replies. "We owe him one for finishing off old Moldy Voldy when he was a tyke.""So long as it's only one...""Well obviously."You...>Eat one of the Beans. [Roll 3d6]>Trick Illya into trying one of the Beans. [Roll 3d6]>Trick Ron into trying one of the Beans. [Roll 3d6]>Trick Gred and Forge into trying one of the Beans. [Roll 3d6]>Ask Illya why her grandfather seems to be on a trading card.>[OTHER]
Rolled 4, 2, 3, 3, 2, 4, 6, 6, 6, 3, 2, 6 = 47>>27015196>>Eat one of the Beans. [Roll 3d6]>>Trick Illya into trying one of the Beans. [Roll 3d6]>>Trick Ron into trying one of the Beans. [Roll 3d6]>>Trick Gred and Forge into trying one of the Beans. [Roll 3d6]
>>27015196Ask Ilya about her grandaddy. We bought these things to look at.
Rolled 4, 6, 2, 1, 3, 5, 5, 6, 4, 4, 2, 4 = 46>>27015196all of the aboveduring laughter ask illya why ger grandfather seems to be on a trading card
Rolled 3, 1, 5, 1, 6, 2, 1, 5, 5, 4, 6, 5 = 44>>27015240>6, 6, 6Poor Ron. He's gonna get the taste of defeat.
>>27015196>Eat one of the Beans. [Roll 3d6]Why the hell not.
Rolled 6, 4, 4, 1, 3, 4, 4, 4, 3, 1, 2, 3 = 39>>27015601>>27015240yeah im pretty sure he just had an allergic reaction, that or he got the "scorpion poision" flavored one
>>27015703No, I think he got one that really is "the bitter taste of defeat" flavored.
>>27015703>>27015719Either way, I'm sure it will be a spectacle, which is the entire reason to have them.
>>27015731>>27015703oh lord, im not even gonna bring up all the horrifying flavors we could come up with, or worse if we hopped over to /b/ for a sec>>27015703u can disregard this i left my dice on from this>>27015327
>>27015703Wow, that was almost dead average.
[TARGET NUMBER = AGILITY + LUCK - DIFFICULTY MODIFIERS][TARGET NUMBER = HOLY SHIT WE'RE NOT EVEN GOING THERE][ROLL = I DON'T EVEN KNOW ANYMORE][I'M NOT EVEN SURE WHETHER YOU FAILED OR SUCCEEDED][ERROR CODE 485: YOU HAVE BROKE THE SIMULATOR]You attempt to be subtle.There are a myriad of ways that you could accomplish your mission - to trick everyone around you into consuming one of these infernal things, including yourself. You slip off your glasses, which get's a worried look from Illya. You pay it no mind. You're on a mission for SCIENCE, and you will not be stopped. You wish to determine just how the beans work, just why their lines of death shift so unpredictably, compared to those of other objects.With utmost subtlety, you begin your operation. The twins, you note, are the most likely subjects to realize that they are being victimized, as they themselves boast of victimizing so many others. Your hands are swift as lightning, throwing two beans at each of their mouths with all of the precision you were taught by Mr. Kiritsugu.Sure, that was meant to be used on throwing knives, against people who meant you and Illya harm, but hell. This is practice. And practice makes perfect."Hey!" Gred exclaims. "Nice party trick, and... Ooh, a good one! Chocolate!'"My brother has all the luck," Forge bemoans, "Brussel sprouts. Blech."Interesting, you note. The lines were shifting in each bean up until they came in contact with saliva, at which point they stabilized into a unique and solid form. Perhaps... perhaps the flavor is not determined until it comes into contact with the subjects mouth. Further data points are required for the ruleset to be established. >Fielld too frickin long.
>>27015963One in each hand, two more beans are flung, this time at Hermione and Neville, who are quite busy chatting about the finer points of the Herbology textbook. Apparently, for a person as morbid as he is, Neville truly has a fondness for plants; whether or not that's born out of a love of flora, or an interest in crossbreeding and toxins is something that you aren't sure of just yet. At the moment, it just seems to be the former, but..."Harry!" Hermione cough. "I could of choked on that, and... hmmm... actually, that's not bad. Raspberry.""Speak for yourself, Herm," Neville grimaces. "Who in their right mind would make a jelly bean with a 'bangers and mash' flavor? I mean, it's not bad, but... it just doesn't work..."You note the same sort of transformation among the lines of the two beans that you flung their. Not enough data points for something if it was going to be a peer reviewed study of the nature of said beans, but more than enough to informally confirm the hypothesis formed from the reactions of Gred and Forge. Three test subjects remain - but for some reason, you don't feel like getting Mr. Jordan involved.You take aim with two more beans..."Bloody hell mate!" Ron exclaims. "Come on, you did two at once for me? Where everyone else only had to sit through one? That's just not bloody fair..." He chews. "Huh. Calamari and Marinara. I guess it could have been worse..."You look at Illya, who is currently staring in shock at one of the cards she found among her pack of chocolate frogs, and a wicked idea crosses your mind. Sure, it might make Illya mad at you, at least in the short term, but it -would- confirm or deny the final test of your hypothesis.Do you go through with it?>Yes>No>[OTHER?]
>>27015972>[OTHER?]Sacrifice ourself instead.
>>27015972This is for science, and for the myriad silent deaths these things amuse us with.
>>27015972>YesMoody: "I swear to god I'll pistol whip the next guy who says 'shenanigans'!"Harry: "Hey Ron, what's the name of that restaurant you like with all the goofy shit on the wall and the mozarella sticks?"Ron: "You mean Shenanigans? You guys are talkin' about Shenanigans, right?"
>>27015972>[Other]Touch it with our tongue to confirm flavor>Give to Ilya if good
>>27016134B-b-but Anon! That's an indirect kiss!
>>27016134That'll ruin our test. Do you want to flirt or do you want to commit nominally scientific vagueries?
>>27016151>Worrying about -indirect- kisses, when so many people are saying to follow through with the idea.
>>27016179well, we could just lick it and then look at it. Or drool onto it.
>>27016151>That's like half the point. We get to test our theory, give Ilya a treat, and see her blush with realization.>>27016179Actually, this gives us more data. We see what happens when a bean touches one mouth then another. Will it switch in between the two, or stay the same?
>>27015972yeswe are going to find a way to put this to use in combat if its the last thing i do, gotta put them crits to usemaybe a rapidly changing spell that cycles through a dozen different incapacitating spells before it hits them, making it impossible to counter?
>>27016296Now thats thinking with SCIENCE!
This seems like a remarkably childish thing to do.Which, I guess means it's in character.
>>27016311Protego, the most common shield charm, is pretty much all-purpose, though.
>>27016320or maybe a lump of iron that when throw shifts between dozens of different weapons? would be a bit less impractical
>>27016311Given that pretty much any spell can be deflected by any other spell, this probably won't really do much for us.
What about a mystic code in the form of a knife that, when thrown, varies between being anywhere from 1 to 20 knives until it strikes the subject.
>>27016357we could incorporate crack/death magic into it allowing it the ability to exploit the cracks in the shield. tho im not sure how these eyes of ours work exactly as i havent seen the cannon for them
>>27016360I think a constantly changing poison would be more practical, and more in line with the Burty Bots Every Flavored Beans.
>>27016385that could be good, you wouldnt know which to block, great for confusing the enemy
>>27016398Go watch Kara no Kyokai. It's faster than going through all of Tsukihime, and it'll give you the rundown on the Mystic Eyes of Death Perception.Also, they're called "Lines".
>>27016416didnt think of that one, thats pretty much insta-death even with magic antipoisionsnot that we need anymore ways to kill people but we should still do it
>>27016398The MEoDP allows one to perceive, and sever, the Concept that supports an Existence, thereby bringing that thing to Death.
>>27016440the movies?>>27016449thats pretty much the basis that ive gathered from this quest
>>27016471The movies are far better than the light novels.
>>27016481i was just confirming, i never have really been able to get into things that jump around so much like that. just when it interests you it tears away and goes to a completely new story
>>27016471Incidentally, if you could reverse that, you'd probably be immune to the Eyes. It has so many fucking obnoxious implications that purists would want to hang me, but major characters do get a free rulebreak in Nasuverse.
>>27016471Yes. One of only three good Nasuverse anime. The other two are the Fate/Zero animu and Carnival Phantasm.kimi to hai issho ga ichiban ieisuki yotte motto gyutto nekimi wo hai atarashii basho e to ieihippattecchaururanra! okurenai de ne
>>27016510Yeah, it's out of chronological order, but the movies themselves are largely episodic and you can't really miss the overarching themes.
>>27016557Oh fuck you, now it's stuck in my head.http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GI-AeHFJ_hE
>>27016557ive seen fate/zero and it was great and im looking forward to the remake of fate/staynight>>27016544im sorry, reverse what? the line severing? and Eyes?
>>27016608Basically, I'm saying MEoDP vs AT fields.
>>27016608>remake of fate/staynightProbably gonna be a while. The Tsukihime remake has taken YEARS, and they haven't even ANNOUNCED an F/SN remake.Or wait...Do you mean...I just googled.Ufotable is doing an F/SN anime?!They had BETTER do Tsukihime after that. It deserves a good anime.
>>27016608i vaguely understand now, kinda>>27016652yep, all of my yep
>>27016677fuck the top one of this>>27016677is to this>>27016625
>>27016652If they do make Tsukihime, I hope it'd be similar to the manga. Though it'd probably coincide with the remake, which is a bit of a shame.
You decide to go through with it.Oh boy is Illya going to kill you. Maybe.Oh boy is Mr. Kiritsugu going to kill you when he finds out. Probably.Still, worth it. For science, among other things. Besides, you've already confessed to one another earlier, even if you were having a bit of a break down, it's only natural for you to do certain things like that. I mean, it's not like you're doing any of the horrible icky things that Mrs. Irisviel showed you in all of those horrible horrible horrible horrible disgusting comics from Mr. Kiritsugu's homeland. That's actually enough to make you second guess your decision to follow through with this idea of yours. The very thought that -this- might wind up leading to -that- is enough to give you pause, and make your stomach perform more backflips than a circus performer hyped up on too much caffeine. But no.You must go through with it.For science."Harry, what's wrong?" Ron asks. "You've been staring at that bean for a while now. It won't be -that- bad; pink's a safe color. The worst I've ever gotten from that was some sort of sickly bubble gum flavor, what's the worst that could happen?""It could wind up being human flesh!" Gred cheers."Or cold sores!" Forge adds.You hope it's neither of those. That would be sort of freaky; and disgusting. You pause for a moment to wonder how either of those brothers would -know- what either of those taste like, or how you would know if you got it, before setting the thought down. You can't overthink things like this. Not with Science on the line. Not with Illya on the line.You pop the jellybean into your mouth.Strawberries.Thank heavens. Illya loves strawberries.>Field. It's long. Too long.
>>27016930You lean over towards Illya. You don't approach all that slowly, as if you did, you would probably lose your nerve. Or get slapped for invading her personal space. Well, that last bit is probably going to happen anyways, but you put the thought out of your mind. You really don't have the nerve to think things through that thoroughly at the moment.Before you go through with it, an odd thought pops into your head.You killed a man before you had your first kiss.Wow.That's kind of sad. Tragic, even.But that's not the point. The point is, as fastly as you can manage without bumping your head into her, you lean into Illya and kiss her. You can vaguely hear the catcalls of immature teenagers applauding your boldness as you then proceed to use your tongue to transfer the jellybean from your mouth to hers. Then, near as quickly as you did it, you lean backwards, your face no doubt a shade of bright, bright red."Strawberries..." Illya says, half in a daze. "I mean... uh, Harry, WHAT THE HECK! Not that I mind or anything, but sheesh, give me some warning next time, will you?"You...>DISTRACTION! Hey Illya! Why's you're grandfather on that card.>EVASION! So, uh, did the bean taste like strawberries then?>BEG FOR MERCY! Oh god please don't tell your father I just did that.>[OTHER]>[JOKE] MAIYA INTERRUPT! No bad touchy!
>>27016943>EVASION! So, uh, did the bean taste like strawberries then?
>>27016943Well, we've got what we came for, so we can change the subject.
>>27016943>DISTRACTION! Hey Illya! Why's you're grandfather on that card.
>>27016943>DISTRACTION! Hey Illya! Why's you're grandfather on that card.We shall have info-dumps if it kills us.
>>27016943[x]EVASION! So, uh, did the bean taste like strawberries then?I kinda want to vote MAYA INTERRUPT, just to see if Kerry is on a helicopter following the train.
>>27016996>A sleep dart suddenly hits us in the neck>Wake up strapped to a metal table.
>>27016943Lets go with the spoilered option :V
>>27016943distraction, deffinatly distraction. we get the added bonus of looking aloof/cool while gaining usefull info
>>27016943>[BRAVERY]"No promises about that Illya. So, strawberries you said?"
>>27016943>BEG FOR MERCY! Oh god please don't tell your father I just did that.
>>27017033yeah let not look like a pussy after our first kiss that happens to be with the person we love and will marryshut up tonks waifufags. illya is who we have feelings for, dealwithit
>EVASION! So, uh, did the bean taste like strawberries then?Confirm the experiment's success>DISTRACTION! Hey Illya! Why's you're grandfather on that card.and then CHANGE SUBJECTS
>>27017089It's not about not going Ilya routeIt's about NOT BEING KILLED BY HER PROTECTIVE MAGICAL ASSASIN DAD
>>27017089THE WAIFUING CAN'T BE STOPPEDDON'T TRY TO FIGHT IT
>>27017097I agree with this man
>>27017121TO BE PERFECTLY FAIR, Iri was actively and obviously trying to ship us. She might shield us from the wrath of Kerry. Maybe.
>>27017134But we must, for Illya shall finally have a universe where she wins. REJOICE the promised time is at hand
>>27017121Her dad loves us and would love for nothing more than for us to marry her
>>27017316Of course we have to beat him in a fist fight first, and by fist fight i mean full city hunt and destroy operation
>>27016943>DISTRACTION! Hey Illya! Why's you're grandfather on that card.Don't let anyone have too much time to think about what they just witnessed.
>>27017225Yes, that little girl deserves happiness more than anyone else I've ever seen or heard of
>>27017342> implying irisviel wouldn't destroy his ass before we even started
"So, uh, did the bean taste like strawberries then?" You ask."Harry!" Hermione interrupts, scandalized for Illya's sake. "That... that was -horribly innappropriate-! Thatthatthat is HARDLY appropriate behavior for... for.. for two eleven year olds to be doing in the middle of... Youyouyou should APOLOGIZE, apologize to Illya for being so... so INAPPROPRIATE!"There is a beat."Hermione~" Illya chirps, latching on to your arm. "Just because Harry's all~mine~ now doesn't mean that I'll be neglecting you~! Ohohoho~ No, that would be such a wasted opportunity~"There is another beat.Ron, Lee, and the Twins snicker. Neville, who seemed to be nearly as scandalized by your display of public affection as Hermione was, quietly buries his face into an advanced herbology textbook, no doubt meant for NEWT level students. You are somewhat glad that Illya isn't so very very mad for the liberties you just took, and also somewhat horrified at the same time. Hermione, if anything, is more scandalized than ever.She takes a deep breath, and looks you dead in the eyes."Harry," she says. "Snog her again please.""Either way, I win." Illya sounds happy. Too happy. She practically -sung- that, and the implications terrify the pants off of you. Actually, no, that's a bad metaphor. The point is...You then notice the way that she's smiling.Oh dear sweet christ she's just like her mother, isn't she?"So, ah, Illya!" You say. "I noticed that your grandfather was on one of the Chocolate frog cards! What's that about?""Oh, nothing~" she says. She also happens to be leaning uncomfortably close to you - actually, no, she's full on pressing herself against you. And it's extremely uncomfortable, as while you would not at all mind marrying this girl and starting a family with her - NOW IS NOT THE TIME. "Old Man Acht apparently has a bit of a... history with some guy named Albus Dumbledore, is all...">Field too long.
>>27017453You...>Point out that Albus Dumbledore is the headmaster of Hogwarts.>Ask to see the Card, so you can find out what she means by "history".>Try to regain some of your lost personal space.>[OTHER]
>>27017461>Ask to see the Card, so you can find out what she means by "history".
>>27017453>>[OTHER]Kiss the girl, then ask to see the card.
>>27017461>>Point out that Albus Dumbledore is the headmaster of Hogwarts.>>Ask to see the Card, so you can find out what she means by "history".
>>27017461Distract Illya from kissing with cuddles. Then ask about history.Illya is like a river, you gotta channel her not block her.
>>27017461Ask for the card. This oughta be good.
>>27017461Kiss, then ask after the card.
>>27017494This.If only to see how long it will take before Maiya swoops in, throws tear gas into the compartment, and then takes us to Kiritsugu.
>>27017590Kerrytugu wouldn't follow us this far, or he would have already interrupted when somebody blew up our compartment and we were running around dead bodies, groping his daughter.
>>27017461kiss, then as about card, then point out about dumbeldore
>>27017453[X] Try not to lose your cool[X] Proceed to lose your cool
>>27017453Kiss her until she backs off, and then look at the card.
Harry is disturbed by the Illya's reaction to the kiss. We shouldn't kiss her again. Try to stay in character people.
>>27017813He's trying NOT to lose control. We're the voice in his head telling him to do just that.
>>27017813Very much this. As much as I love Illya route and all, it makes no sense to do it again
>>27017813Yeah but harry hasballs/rises to challenges He'd do it if prompted like that
>>27017844I disagree. He seems generally freaked out that Illya just transformed into her mother after that kiss. Losing control right now isn't more kisses. Losing control would be running away.
>>27017853Maybe we should use Hermione as a human shield/sacrifice?
>>27017882Rereading...you may have a point.
>>27017886Yeah, we should sacrifice her chewtoy in trade for the card.
>>27017453>Ask to see the Card, so you can find out what she means by "history".Oh Root...Acht is Grindelwald, isn't he?
>>27017898Harry doesn't lose control, unless you try to kill illya
>>27017926Or if a lady homunculus gets amorous.
>>27017926True dat.And sometimes for -piece of shit bullies- as well.
"Any chance I can take a look?" You ask, slinking back a bit in a vain attempt to regain some of your lost personal space. Yeah, you don't think you're getting that back until someone pries her off of you. "Considering the fact that Albus Dumbledore happens to be, you know, the headmaster of the school this train is heading to, it would be nice to know whether there's any bad blood between him and the von Einzbern's."Illya pouts."Oh, you're no fun," she complains. She takes the card, and... of course she hold it just outside of your reach. Actually -giving- you the card would just make things too bloody easy, wouldn't it. "Fine, I'll give you the card, on one condition."You nod slowly, dreading the worst. Illya, she never really believed all that much in fair deals - more than once, she managed to extort some of the other girls in school into dressing up like maids for her, in exchange for various favors. It.. never worked more than once, as generally few enough classmates were stupid enough to ask Illya for a favor more than once. Quite frankly, you fear for your chastity. Which is odd; isn't it usually the -girl- whose the one who is supposed to be fearing for -her- chastity, and isn't that only supposed to hapen when the two parties are alone. But you suppose that this is your only path... you don't think Illya will do anything that you'll come to regret later.Hopefully."More cuddles!" She says, latching on to you. Wait, wasn't she already sort of pressing herself into you? You aren't quite sure of the mechanics of this maneuver, but at least it isn't nearly as overtly innappropriate as it was beforehand.You sigh in resignation."Fine.">Field too Long.
>>27017977The card passes into your hand, and you take a closer look at it. You're in all honestly quite surprised - whenever this portrait was made, it had to have been ages ago. "Old Man Acht" looks maybe a little bit older than Tonks, a little bit younger than Regulus - a young man in the prime of his life. Certainly not the wizened and ancient old Magus who is known for never leaving his castle.===JUBSTACHEIT VON EINZBERN===Little is known about this enigmatic alchemist, save that he was for a time apprenticed under Nicholas Flamel. Having disappeared and reappeared throughout the past two centuries, it is believed his name may have become a title, taken by multiple wizards, likely his descendents. His last confirmed sighting was in Hogsmeade, October 31, 1981, sharing a drink with his fellow apprentice: Albus Dumbledore.Consistent among his many appearances are his white hair, golden eyes, and his accompaniment by a small battalion of maids - speculated to be Homunculi. He received the Order of Merlin, First Class, for his single handed defense of his homeland of Bulgaria during Grindelwald's War.======This just raises further questions. You know who Flamel is, but...>Who the heck was Grindelwald?>What's an Order of Merlin? What's First Class supposed to be, anyways?>Wasn't October 31, 1981 the day your parent's died?>[OTHER]
>>27017913I can just imagine Hermione's expression.
>>270179841and2Also, do not neglect cuddles
>>27017984>Acht has been planning this the whole time>It's why he *Really* sent kerry and Iri to England>Dumbdoir an Zelrecht are in on itOh god we're so fucked.
>>27017984>Ilya got her maid fertsh from grandpa
>>27017984All of these are important questions, roughly in the listed order.Now make with the sacrificing.
>>27017984>>27017977so is your grandpa some sort of undead vampire wizard as well? cause 2 centuries is along time to live under any circumstances.
>>27017984>>Who the heck was Grindelwald?>>What's an Order of Merlin? What's First Class supposed to be, anyways?>>Wasn't October 31, 1981 the day your parent's died?
You are now aware that some time there will be shenanigans afoot that will force us to dress up as a maid. We will have to spend the entire time avoiding Illya or else she rapes us right then and there.
>>27018089Yeah I'm gonna do everything in my power to sabatoge that sneak attempt
>>27018089>maid rape>implying thats not good end for illyapoor house elves.
>>27018163But house elves don't wear clothes...
>>27018174It's not like we would keep one anyway
>>27018038>Jubstacheit benefiting from you being happy.>A bad thing.Jesus, you guys are almost as bad as the people who think that good old Uncle Tom doesn't have Tonks' best interests at very warped heart. He just wants to win the #1 Bestest Uncle of the Year Award, guys, even if he's really, really bad at being good.>>27018055Yeah, pretty much. Why else do you think -every single canon von Einzbern Homunculus- is a female, and a Maid, with the exception of Iri (who probably would have been a maid, if Kiri didn't marry her)?>>27018089It's not rape if it's Illya. It's friendly skinship.
>>27018202Paranoia is endemic in the roleplay community.
>>27018202Zouken's waifu wan't a maid....was she?
>>27018216Think about it from the character's point of view. What reason does Tom have to be Tonks' enemy, and what reason does Acht have to be ours?
>>27018136>>27018163Just remember that she might get kicked out of hogwarts if she rapes a student in the open.
>>27018202We must be in the same house as illya, no compromises Wonder when the timeskip are gonna be
>>27018253That goes without saying
>>27018252No it would just be public indecency, we'd cover for herPlus, it's not rape if you like it
>>27018089Why would we avoid her?
>>27018202I think its less paranoia and more 'oh shit how much of our life has been carefully planned and more importantly WHAT DO THEY EXPECT US TO DO"
>>27018268 no way, there would be tons of interesting hooks available if we weren't in the same house as her.
>>27017984>Wasn't October 31, 1981 the day your parent's died?
>>27018303Yeah.Meathooks.Meathooks and chains.Ilya's kinda posessive.
>>27018297>WHAT DO THEY EXPECT US TO DOKill things, probably.
>>27018038I vote we realize this and all the implications.
>>27018303> trusting anyone else to see her in her pj's first thing in the morning with a cup of hot coco in the common room/lounge while it freezing outside Alright now I'm waifuing, this will be much better a few years from now
>>27018297In Acht's case, he just expects you to love his beloved grand daughter and add the strength of the Peverell's to his family's own by way of lots and lots of darling great grandchildren.It helps a LOT that Kiri succeeded in winning the von Einzbern's the grail. That a von Einzbern branch will inherit the Emiya crest, well that's gravy. Now that his ambition is fulfilled, he can sit back and play benevolent patriarch while his grandkids squabble for the right to inherit the family Crest.
>>27018354Can you rewrite like the entire HP series?
>>27018354I like this old dude already
>>27018354Yep I knew it. Its grandkids.Does this mean Acht will back us up if Kiris on the prowl for fooling around with Illya?
>>27018367No timeskips? That'd be hard> captcha: snuggling raceha
>>27018391It'd be pretty boring.
>>27018331THE HOOKS.THE HOOKS.THE HOOKS LAD.
>>27018367It would probably end up a trashy lesbian action romcom.>>27018378No. Not unless a ring is on her finger and you're prepared to take her name like her father took Iri's.
>browsing /tg/>Harry Potter Nasuverse Quest Thread"Yeah, that's gotta be a pile of sh-">You are Harry James Potter, and you just killed a man."-ining glory and awesomeness, I'll give 'er a go."
Well this thread got lewd.What are we going to do next? Hold Illya's hand while we wait to be sorted?
>>27018410No, to many guys that would try to take advantage of her later in school Also, anyone who ever tries to do anything even remotely romantic shall face our dead eyes wrath
>>27018422I know that feel!When I first was it I was sure it would be crap, but then I read it and learned better.
>>27018447Unfortunately, it's alphabetical, innit?
>>27018633Why in the world would it be alphabetical?
>>27018633Well it depends on weather they count the Von as part of Illya's name. If they don't Einzbern will go before us.
>>27018422note, we may be the Shiki of the universe, and we Dotstabbed the fuck out of voldy's minion literally in 5 minutes on the train, it was hilarous.also this game is a glorious pile of clusterfuck and shenanigans.
>>27018673...because it vvas so in the books?
>>27018710I thought you meant where they go would be alphabetical
>>27018682>also this game is a glorious pile of clusterfuck and shenanigans.Now where have I heard THAT before...
You attempt to initiate maneuver number seven hundred and sixty two, in an attempt to force through an on screen info dump. There are so many questions this card brings up, questions that need answering - you almost forget to fulfill the snuggle quota that Illya demanded in recompense for showing you said card. Who was this Grindelwald character? What is this 'Order of Merlin, First Class' thing that Illya's grandfather was awarded? Why did Old Man Acht meet up with Albus Dumbledore on the night your parents died?Unfortunately, all but one of these things can be answered with outside knowledge, independent of this story and rooted within J.K. Rowling's Canon. The very threads of the Universe rise up against your attempt to invoke an info dump, and in their haste they throw the baby away with the bath water. Gaia itself screams in rage, that one would dare violate the sanctity of her rules, that no walls of text shall be dedicated to mindless infodumpery, and shunts all of the information into the depths of the off screen.The rest of the ride towards Hogwarts goes without much incident. You ask your questions of your friends new and old, and between the cultural knowledge of Neville and the Weasleys, and the textbook knowledge of Hermione Granger, your questions are answered. Grindelwald was a necromantic douchebag who was basically Wizard Hitler. The Order of Merlin is like the American Medal of Honor, only much more magicky sounding, and First Class is the highest that can be bestowed.Somehow, in the middle of it all, Illya winds up falling asleep on your lap. You cradle her head for the rest of the ride, somewhat glad that her... excitement... died down a little.>Field too long.
>>27018750Before you know it, the train comes to a stop - the jovial voice of the conductor announcing that you have arrived in the town of Hogsmeade. You aren't quite sure what it is with these Wizards and their obsession with Pigs, but you aren't going to question it. You wake up Illya, and the two of you walk hand in hand off the train together.In the distance, you see a large man who's posture reminds you of Illya's big friendly dog. In one hand he holds a great big lantern, and in the other hand he holds an enormous, Pink umbrella."Firs' years!" he calls. "Firs' years over here!""Well, that's us." You say. "But why only the first years?"As you walk over, Hermione is more than happy to show off what she learned from Hogwarts a History. Of course, if you're reading this, you've probably already read the books or watched the movies, so there's really no need to explain it a second time. All you really need to know is that there are four to a boat, and unfortunate Ron and Neville went off to join up with some of there friends from the Wizarding Community.You, Hermione, and Illya get in one of the boats, and they way things are split up, there is room for one more. You decide to take...>The African fellow with a Scottish accent.>The timid brunette girl with short cropped hair.>That one guy who for some reason has two last names.>[OTHER]
>>27018758Find a dense-looking guy vvith spiky red hair and an ugly svveater under his robes.
>>27018758I don't remember any of these people. Have the snake pretend to be a fourth person so we don't have to let them in.
>>27018758>[OTHER] Take nobody else, turn everyone else away and claim the seat is taken.
>>27018758go drag dean over here hes the african fellow with the scottish accent
>>27018784In order:Dean ThomasAnne Choi ("M"GQ)Justin Finch-Fletchley
>>27018758>[OTHER]That blue haired girl with glasses. Is she eating curry somehow?
>>27018823I wanted to guess but all I was coming up with were generals and actors.
>>27018835THIS.But Ciel-senpai is probably still a senpai here, which means that she wouldn't be here... shame.
I'm gonna let this one stew overnight. Even conglomerates of over six hundred beasts need to get sleep sometimes, you know.
>>27018783[x] Yeah I vote for that guy.
>>27018783Is he going to have a sword keyring or something?
>>27018979Nah, his vvand vvould be in fact a svvord "cleverly" disguised vvith some tvvigs.
>>27018758>Anne Choi ("M"GQ)I don't know who this is, but she has my vote.
>>27018783The guy who thinks he's a sword is a year or two younger than Ilya. Sadly that means no Rin either.
[x]Short kid with the fancy staff for a wand
>>27019049OH DEAR GOD, THIS
>>27019041...dammit, indeed.>>27019049Voting for this then.
>>27019014>Mr. UNKNOWN Shirou, where is your wand?>Right here, sir>Pretty sure that's sword. Badly hidden inbetween some twigs>Haha but that can't be right, look, It has a handle and the wooden extension right here>Truly marvelous wand, Mr. UNKNOWN>Haha, why thank you.>That was sarcasm>Excuse me, what?I kind of see It
>>27019049>>27019053Yeah sure.If you want to lose Illya, Hermione, Tonks, et cetera to his swag, I mean.>>27019037MC of a quest I ran under the name ReADS. Shy, not particularly self confident, really good at tinkering, one of the few baseline humans without any genemods, and eventually broke the setting by hacking entropy.In this, she'll be haremette option number 462, who if left unpersued romantically will probably wind up dating Luna Lovegood or Ginny Weasley, depending on circumstances.
>>27019049Don't be silly.[X] Dean he only becomes a cock-end later if memory serves.
>>27019103>If you want to lose Illya, Hermione, Tonks, et cetera to his swag, I mean.What would our odds of turning the tables and stealing everyone's favorite librarian from him?
>>27019103>If you want to lose Illya, Hermione, Tonks, et cetera to his swag, I mean.Fine. Though he technically goes to Britian's other magic school, right? Triwizard Tournament might get interesting if non-Durmstrang/Beuxbatons schools get included
>>27019103... Eh, she works.Voting for the chick to see lesbian makeouts down the line.Besides, we drop Ilya now I think there's going to be violent murders.
>>27019140Worse than none.As in, you might join his harem if you try.
>>27019143Dear lord, you're right. What servant would he summon though?
>>27019103Man's got a harem and a lolipire. He doesn't need to jack our shit.
>>27019143>Clocktower brats get invited to Triwizard>Shit completely hits the fan
It's true I'll hunt you all down then off myself for failing to stop it.
>>27019158Well then it is NOT worth the risk.>>27019166He's Welsh. That means he is, inherently, a fucking mongrel who will steal your shit for no good reason. The Welsh are a mongrel race who should be wiped from the earth.
>>27019180God damnit. I wish we had a lolipire.
>>27019174Whoops Kent to reply to this >>27019149Came out way creepier ilthan intended
>>27019166You imply he'll do it intentionally.That kid makes the Tohno Gland look like weak sauce.>>27019180Well, either that, or they become mega otakus who hack the universe to change their names, go to teach at a Japanese Catholic School, and fuck with people who have the MEoDP.
>>27019208> KentFuck phone posting really just fuck it.
>>27019209I think he's more a salsa kind of guy.
>>27019158Wait what if we counter this by getting that strange clumsy kid who has a nack for falling into girls skirts and all other forms of cloathingWhile these two duke it out we got free rain over Illya
>>27019159Guys. Guys. Guys. Guys. Guys.Guys.I've said it in an earlier thread. I'm not going to write a grail war for this quest. Not unless you want it to feature Old Man Harry and Granny Illya duking it out against all these young whipper snappers and their fancy augmented reality and their transhumanism and their declining magic...Actually, that sounds hilarious. I might just do that, as an epilogue.
>>27019201>Rakan vs Archer>So many swords it collapses into swordularity
>>27019251Won't work. You'd just have the two harems engaging in open warfare in the halls of hogwarts.
>>27019268I think Rakan has more swords, by nature of his artifact, plus every other kind of weapon.
>>27019277Thats the point their war will keep them distracted form taking our Illya, also lets throw more fuel on to this fire lets grab Japanese austin powers and pokemon with tits protag man
>>27019266that sounds like the greatest sequel known to manand you know it is.
>>27019294Raken would have more swords up until he actually uses those swords. Archer has all of those plus all of gil's swords plus his own two.
>>27019358>Archer has all of those plus all of gil's swords plus his own two.Plus every single sword he encountered over the course of his life.
>>27019294You cannot have more swords than Archer. If you do and he sees them then he has them too. And he can make loads of them at once.
>>27019377>>27019358Once he figured that out he'd switch to I dunno, Axes? Magical Arrows? Anything not a sword?
>>27019377in other words archer is broken as dicks and really had no reason to lose against bahsahkah in all honesty.
>>27019393HE can do all those too.
>>27019393Archer can duplicate nonswords.
>>27019393>implying that matters>implying your shitty axe will do will against excaliber, or any of the gates of babylon weaponsor the nine tails, or any of the other giant piles of magical bullshit he has.
>>27019400>had no reason to lose against bahsahkahNo, he did. Bahsahkah was stronger. Archer is the ultimate hard counter to Gilgamesh, and is surprisingly strong for his class, but he isn't even near Herakles' level in a straight fight.
>>27019437>ultimate hard counter>would still get raped in the ass by EA extremely badlyseriously Gils Noble is broken as almighty fuck when the damn thing even shits a hole through gaias reality marble.
>>27019460Ea is a hard counter to everything. It's a perfect object that predates its own Concept.
>>27019400Yeah, he did.All the swords he summons receive an automatic rank-down from their original forms. And aside from his FUCKING INSANE stats and NINE GODDAMN LIVES, Berserker was also flat immune to any attack below A rank.Archer didn't have all that much in his arsenal capable of hurting him, much less killing him nine times over in a single fight. I think he still ended up killing him like 4 or 5 times though.
>>27019460And yet, Proto-Archer Shirou completely hard-countered Gil's shit.Ea? Just cut off his arm before he can use it, because Gil is a fucking SCRUB when he can't just swordspam.
>>270194835, yeah.Archer is FUCKING HARDCORE when his master's hormones aren't turning him into a suicidal jobber.
>>27019483He killed him seven times, I think. And then, because those wounds weren't able to heal, Caliburn killed him again, once for itself and then once more for all of those wounds Archer gave him. So Archer killed him fourteen times without his Reality Marble.
>>27019460Well yeah Ea trumps everything short of Avalon, but given how Gilgamesh won't use it if it's someone who isn't worthy of it (and a mongrel faker definitely wouldn't be worthy) then Archer is just flat out better at their fighting style than him and by the time he'll be desperate enough to pull out Ea it'll already be too late.You can't just say "Well what if Gilgamesh did something he would never do?" to dispute a hard counter status.
>>27019485That's only cause he got overconfident and didn't wear his armor. Serious Gil is near impossible to take down.
>>27019527>UBW happens>implying a marble phantasm isn't worthy of being EA'd to fuck and back
>>27019556>Serious Gil is near impossible to take down.Gil doesn't GET serious for anything. It goes completely against his character.
>>27019563Like he instantly pulled out Ea when Shirou dropped his Reality Marble on him oh wait.
>>27019556Gil has all the rulebreakers, though. He's the perfect example of a perfect being, with chains that bind god, the purest examples of all divine mysteries and Noble Pantasms, a Sword that predates Sword, and I think I heard once that he has a trinket that gives him some resistance to True Magic, but I'm pretty sure that's bullshit because I don't actually remember reading it anywhere except a conversation about him.
>>27019460Ea may be the ultimate Noble Phantasm, but its got a very distinctive charge-up time, similar to Excalibur in speed. You cannot match it in power or block it, but you can dodge it, or stab him to death before he gets the attack off. Shirou did the latter, so it stands to reason that Archer could as well, considering he WAS Shirou (but better in every conceivable way, at least when not master-less and conserving mana) in terms of fighting capability.Gil might win if he went full ruthless and concentrated on nothing but winning at all costs, but that isn't how he rolls, especially not against a goddamn piece of shit faker like Archer. When his opponents piss him off he likes to toy with them and humiliate them to prove his superiority, its kind of hard-coded into his personality. Ea is his only true trumpcard in this matchup, but his retard-level arrogance prevents him from using it until the last possible moment when it may or may not be too late.
>>27019582nvm your righti keep forgetting exactly how much of a retard gil actually is.
>>27018758>>The timid brunette girl with short cropped hair.Yessssss
>>27019563UBW is a Reality Marble, not a Marble Phantasm. Two completely different things.Lemme try and remember how it was explained to me.Picture a jar, filled with 99 white marbles, and 1 black marble.Now picture two people. Both can always pull a black marble out of the jar.One, we'll call her Pam, does it using a Marble Phantasm.The other, we'll call him Robert, does it using a Reality Marble.When Pam reaches into the jar and triggers her Marble Phantasm, she just always pulls out the black one without really needing to try or think about it. The Marble Phantasm rapes probability so that she has a 100% chance of pulling the black marble, instead of the 1% a normal person would have.When Robert reaches into the jar and activates his Reality Marble, all of the marbles turn black. His Reality Marble rapes the universe into being how he wants it to be.
>this quest thread started by being on the rails>gets completely derailed by powerlevels and who beats who and why>all because someone mentioned the holy grail warlol
>>27019645thanks i always forget how the 2 go and it gets confuseing as to who gets what sometimes.
>>27019650Welcome to Nasu, enjoy your stay.
>>27019645A more simple version of that:Marble Phantasm is the ability to always pull the one black marble out of the jar.A Reality Marble is the ability to turn all the marbles green, and have them dance around playing traditional mexican folk tunes while wearing sombreros.I find that gets across the "I reject the very rules of reality and substitute my own" factor inherent in Reality Marbles.
>>27019666As opposed to a Marble Phantasm, which breaks out the whips and chains and makes reality beg to its mistress.
>>27019714Ya know, despite how talked up Marble Phantasm is, Arc doesn't really do much fancy stuff with it.
>>27019745She uses it all of once in Tsukihime proper, and it's pretty impressive there, if not terribly fancy.Then comes Melty Blood and suddenly Marble Phantasm is CHAINS, CHAINS EVERYWHERE.
>>27019071...that gives me an idea.Harry is learning to make Mystic Codes, right?And Kerry recognised wands as a primitive kind of Mystic Code.With a bit more time and training Harry could modify his changeling spear into acting as a wand for casting HP-verse spells.This is all hinds of awesome.
>>27019989>spear>in the NasuverseAre you guys TRYING to get us killed? So much as coming within ten feet of a spear is enough to give you bad luck for a week. Fucking MAINING one?! That's just asking to die horribly.
>>27019989Yes, yes it is.
>>27020015I'll just leave this here...
>>27019766She was weak as piss in Tsukihime with what being killed as far as she can die.
>>27020009We could try fucking with the invisible, perfect knife.
>>27019159Toki. because healing.
I'd still like if we worked on Serpensal Mystic Code, if only for Illya to be able to talk with Gil-kun.and for us to retain the ability just in case after Voldie's dealt with
So uh, when/are you going to publish the system at any point?
>>27022595This, I am incredibly curious as well.
>>27020480Are we not also really good at healing?...wait...what if once we learn spells that heal injury...we tried using our ability to see lines to kill the injury...or use our knowledge of how the injury could kill us to better and more quickly/efficiently mend both ourselves or others...Can we use the ability to see the death of things to spite death on some occasions?
>>27023523Are WE good at healing? Maybe, maybe not. We haven't tried. Our WAND is good at healing, though.For your second question, canon Ryougi saved someone's life by killing their appendicitis and canon Tohno stopped a suicide by killing the poison they had already consumed.
>>27023591Our compassionate trait gives us a healing bonus IIRC
>>27023731So it does. I tend to forget a lot of the traits and feats we have, on account of us having become death, destroyer of worlds.
>>27023523>>27023731...We will be a doctor fueled by Spite, Compassion, and a view of magical SCIENCE! We will one day work at St. Mungos and operate on a scale not dissimilar to Gregory House.
>>27022935If i'm reading the statblock right, it's almost a dead ringer for GURPS with some slight modifications.
>>27023752Harry Potter is the cure for the common cold.
>>27023767He does seem to be more of a Utility wizard right now, eyehax notwithstanding. Reinforcement, mystic codes, healing, stealth and physical skills. ...christ, he's perfectly set up to be an utterly infuriating prankster. Combine that with Ilya's mischief and Alchemy, Hogwarts is going to be in damned chaos.
>>27023763You mean where we do absolutely nothing until a stupidly unusual or rare case comes by, which might prompt us to activity once every few weeks at best?
>>27023860If he's banging ilya in the interlude weeks then fuck yes.
>>27023860No, when that happens we just dotstab whatever's ailing the patient and be done with it.
>>27023872Either her or Tonks. Or both.
>>27023878But then we're a solitary miracle worker unless we develop a type of magic that works on illness like we work on death.
>>27023890Given Harry's recent loveyness with Ilya spiking, I am hard pressed to see him not sticking with Ilya. And maybe whoever she turns into her maids, iunno.
>>27023852The line between prankster and assassin is merely the lethality of the tricks.
>>27023912Eh, we're eleven. There's still a long time for stuff to happen. Also, Tonks is, like, sixteen so it'd be kinda creepy right now.
>>27023852the weasly twins shall have worthy successors
>>27023852But will Peeves listen to him?
>>27023940If he doesn't, we can probably kill him.
>>27023940The moment he demonstrates what a dotstab can do? I should expect so.
>>27023944I just thought of something. We might be able to make Nick fully headless.
>>27023956Dumbledore walks in on us with a boradsword and Nick resting his head on a desk right before we chop it off. wat do?
>>27024004>Chop his head off>Say: "He's dead! I cut his head off!"
>>27024004"Let's be fair, this is not the worst thing you've caught me doing."
>>27024004Explain to Dumbles that interrupting delicate surgery is a very bad idea.
>>27024004"Oh Good evening Head Master. Young Master Potter here believes he has found a magical way to make me a fully headless ghost, that I may finally be able to join the headless hunt. I saw no harm in at least letting him attempt the procedure...and admit no small amount of hope that he succeeds" said Nicholas.
>>27024029>That line>Harry makes awesome shit>Is snarky and clever>defined by nasty injury>Has devoted girlfriend depite trading innuendo with everything with tits>Parents left him a fortuneChrist, all we have to do is make Harry an alcoholic and he's Magical Tony Stark
>>27024094I push all my characters toward alcoholism to begin with, and the Wizarding world has a very positive view on drinking.
>>27024094My goodness, this will end delightfully as a course of study.We're well on our way to just being a degenerate Stardust the Super Wizard
>>27023763Y'know, House is fun, but if we're gonna become a doctor, we could probably do more good as a muggle doctor. A Neurosurgeon, to be specific.
>>27024094As long as we keep Illya as the devoted girlfriend, I'm fine with this
>>27024202Why, so we can save the life of a young boy who becomes a horrible monster? No thanks. Tenma's cool, but I wouldn't want to be him.
>>27024202No no no, we blend Magical Medicine and Mundane Medicine for the benefit of all and become the kick off point for a future where magic exists in the open...because if the Statute of Secrecy bullflop carries on for much longer, the Wizard Community is going to be soooooo far left behind. I know it shows up in their Mundane Fantasy lit....but is it widely realized that Muggles have been to the moon...and have harnessed the power of atomic fire?
>>27024252By saving his life we would cause dozens of other people to die. We can't not do this it's practically written into our existence.Also guys I'm unclear, at first I thought we were supposed to take Harry and Illya's "I love you"s as trauma induced not yet serious but I'm not sure any more.
>>27024326So you're saying we're doomed to become Wizard Kenzo Tenma?On the one hand, I fuckin' love Monster, so I'm cool with this. On the other hand, being Tenma is suffering, almost as much as being Lancer.
>>27024375"Sorry, this seat's taken."Those are your only words as various other first years try to board the boat that you, Illya, and Hermione have taken for yourselves. Hermione seems somewhat annoyed that you're not even -trying- to make nice with some of the other first years. Illya on the other hand seems delighted - quite possibly because your efforts are reserving her a boat alone with her two favorite chew toys.Of course, some of the students are a bit curious or impetuous enough to demand to know -who- has taken the vacantly occupied. This is where Gilgamesh comes in. Being a possibly venomous and certainly unidentifiable snake of unknown breeding and species, he is the perfect candidate for driving off people whom you don't much care to sit next to. You do sort of wish Ron and Neville stuck around - you could probably get away with letting Illya sit on your lap or something - but something came up about "cute Indian twins."You're kind of glad that you won't have to go through with any of those bizarre courting rituals with Illya. Hopefully. Though honestly, you wouldn't be surprised if she demanded that you go through them for the sake of tradition, love, and justice. "'Ey mate, wha's all these cholo's saying about me?" Gil asks."They're intimidated by your magnificence," you tell him. "You're a pretty big snake, Gil, and an exotic one at that. I think they might think you're venomous.""Bloody right, I am," he says. "Me mum always told me - all the venom in the world was ours, if we wanted to use it."Now that's interesting. The muggle textbooks on snakes weren't much to go by when it came to identifying just what sort of creature Gilgamesh was. Neither was the copy of Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them that you picked up from the bookstore in Diagon Alley. Gil having any venom he wanted - even if it was just limited to those of mundane serpents - was another data point to work with."S-so cute...">Field too long...
>>27024710Your musings are interrupt by a soft and stutter voice saying something you weren't quite expecting. Cute was hardly the adjective you were aiming for, letting Gilgamesh off of your arm to slither up next to Hermione. You were hoping for something along the lines of "Scary", or "bloody terrifying", or at the very least "Cool"."C-can I p-pet him?"Gil turns his head to you, a bit surprised that this one isn't scurrying off like all the others."Wha's this one saying 'bout me, mate?"You blink. Hermione glares at you, with a look that says "Harry, I swear to God if you find an excuse to keep the -one- person who wasn't intimidated by your pet off of this boat, I will blast you with the full destructive power of friendship." Illya doesn't seem to be paying much attention, having fallen asleep again."She's saying you're... cute." You tell him. "She wants to pet you."There is a beat."I like this one, mate," He says. "Not a cowardly fookin' cholo like all the others, tha's for sure."There is another beat.Hermione's glare intensifies.Oh, fine. You suppose you will have to get used to dealing with new people - besides, it's not like Dudley is here to turn them all against you! A fresh start, without any -piece of shit bullies- who all want to join in on the Harry Hunting..."Yeah, sure," you say. "Come on in."Huh. The moment that the newcomer - Anne Choi, she says her name is - takes a seat next to Hermione, the boat start shuddering forward. As you watch Gilgamesh wrap himself around the girl's arm - and you swear, he's -preening- from her attention - a thought runs through your mind. Was this some sort of test? Would you have been dropped from the program, if your antisocial tendencies prevented a fourth from coming aboard?Either way, you find the boat ride to be...>Choppy on the windy lake, nearly spilling you overboard.>Smooth sailing all the way down. Almost boring.>A bit rough, more reminiscent of a log ride than a rowboat.>[OTHER]
I know I'm literally just posting this, but one of my mates just got his car parts in, and needs a lift to the shop. It should only be a short jaunt, but yeah.
>>27024719>Choppy on the windy lake, nearly spilling you overboard.
>>27024719>[OTHER]somewhat ruined by sea sickness
>>27024738lol kBut seriously, Sensei. Do hurry up[x] Magical experience. You're on a BOAT, motherfucker!
>>27024719>Choppy on the windy lake, nearly spilling you overboard.LIVIN' ON THE EDGE!
>>27024719>Choppy on the windy lake, nearly spilling you overboard.We must stand proudly on the stern, like Washington crossing the Potomac!
>>27024719>Choppy on the windy lake, nearly spilling you overboard.we are so excited our magic riles up the waves
>>27024815>like Washington crossing the Potomac!I have a suspicion you did that on purpose, but he crossed the Delaware.
>>27024815Washington crossed the DELAWARE river, learn yo history.
>>27024815>emulating the colonies
>>27024863>http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R7yfISlGLNUWe're on a boat mother fucker...don't you ever forget
>>27024815Washington crossed the Delaware to kill Germans in their sleep on Christmas. He was born on the Potomac.This post is not spam, god damn it.
>>27024719Ride the [BOAT] like the [MALE] you are!
>>27024719Perhaps we should also talk to the new girl who seems so enthralled by our sna-...I'm not going to finish that sentence.
>>27024977A lot of people seem to be enthralled by our long things.
>>27024995Wand, Snake...we are collecting a might too many phallic things...this can only end in continued misunderstandings...hilarious misunderstandings.
>>27024788There is no room for mundanity in a magical Wizard that can see Death.
>>27025046Don't forget that we gave Hermione our magic stick
>>27025191...Illya will have a score of maids drawn from the women we will have had misunderstandings with.
>>27025346But wouldn't that lead to Illya having misunderstandings with them?
>>27025466Misunderstandings for everyone!
>>27025554guessing op is dead right?
>>27025736Patience Anon. Try waiting for three months
>>27025748He's just giving a friend a lift to the autoparts store, all's well.
>>27025748your giving me nightmares alreadyi just can wait till me go for a practice duel and we pull out a gun, or use wandless magic and everybody WTFs at us
>>27025775or we kill someones wand and they just stand there not knowing what to do
>>27025772>He was in a car accident>He really is dead.
>>27025748>Followed "M"GQ>It died>Followed CPMGQ>Rejoice when "M"GQ returns>They both die>Follow HPNasu quest>It died>Rejoice when it returns>Learn they all came from the same personI have no faith that this quest will reach completion. I'm still going to come along for the ride, as long as it lasts.
>>27025775 I'm pretty sure that won't happen. We're not that stupid.I'm hyped for any kind of magical contest like thing. Honestly, if we finished first year and then did a new story with a time skip to year four, I'd be ecstatic.
>>27025865Cyberpunk Magical Girl Quest.Also had heavy Lovecraft elements.Lasted all of what, a month?
>>27025879we wont pull a gun but i do support pulling out our spear or at least our knife. also, we are making magic code armor to where under our robes. and cqc is always a very very fun option
>>27025881I thought he said it died because of lack of interest. Considering the amount of hype happening because of the return of HP Nasuverse, I doubt it'll die that fast.Also, I reuse to let this die until Illya's happy end is set in stone.
>>27025917and almost all the teachers can use wandless magic, it wouldnt be unusual for a prodigy to be able to. it would just impress the fuck out of pretty much everyone. "Hah, you've lost your wand, your mine now harry!" we proceed to cut off his hand with our magicaly reinforced hand
>>27025974> Not cutting it off with our invisible knifeUnless we're wearing out glasses. Actually, do we know if we can use the knife as just a knife?
>>27026025i imagine so, but we should save the actualy knifey bit of that as a backup. if we're ever kidnapped theve obviously wouldnt take itplus, using our hand to take another persons hand off its just terrifiying. barehanded killsshowing off our reinforcement like its nothing, that or we just play it off like we've always been able to do it
>>27026025Also can we see the knife with our glasses on?
>>27026308>>27026025i dont think the glasses have anything to do with the knife, i think the only thing that the glasses do is prevent us from seeing everything around is die, which actually sounds like itd be better as contacts cause the edges, unless its a magicy thing that neutralizes it while theyre on, and if im not talking out of my assalso i imagine that the dagger is only visible to those of the potter bloodline
>>27026375>potter bloodlineYou might be on to something, but I think you might have the family wrong. It's probably the Peverell bloodline.
>>27026403 Old man Acht is going to be very pleased with his great grandchildren.
>>27026403peverell? havent brushed up on my lore from any og the universes
>>27026443The three brothers who were the original owners of the Deathly Hollows. Harry is a distant descendant of the youngest brother, and Voldemort is one of the oldest.
>>27026443The family who created the deathly hollows, whose heirloom is a permanent and undetectable invisible cloak
>>27026463oh yeaas i remember, that makes sense. tho it doesnt really impact us all that much>>27026474didnt snape take that from us at some point?
>>27026463Wait, no, the middle brother. Not the oldest.
>>27026487We haven't gotten it yet. OG Harry didn't get it until Christmas of his first year.
>>27026474we could sew the cloak into the armor we're gonna makelittle op but still, assassins dont turn down opness
>>27026540Or simply study it and uncover it's secrets.
You are Harry James Potter, and you are in for one wild...Wait, this isn't the start of a new thread."Ohgodohgodohgodohgodohgodohgod..."Hermione is clinging to the sides of the boat like it was some sort of life preserving flotation device. Anne is doing much the same, though instead of hyperventilating prayer's for mercy into the cold blue of the night she just looks a little green. Illya, of course, is sleeping soundly as the windswept waves knock the boat around in a hypnotic, drowsy rhythm. You, on the other hand, are doing something -extremely- stupid.Your faithful snake wrapped around your arm has perched its head upon your shoulder as if it were some sort of exotic bird. You yourself have taken the stance of the Pirates Privateers that scoured the seas in the name of Great Britain. One foot braced against the stern of your ship, one foot firmly planted on the deck, you do not flinch nor falter in the face of the ripping winds or the icy chill of the lake spray.You wonder if you could have avoided this if you cast off earlier, and not prompted the boat into catching up with the rest of the Fleet of the First Years."Wha's in sa hells are we doing, mate?" Gilgamesh asks you."Being awesome." You state succintly."HARRY!" Hermione yells over the rip of the winds. "Quit talking to you snake and sit down! You'll fall overboard!""These winds are nothing!" you roar over the windy roar. "There's not a chance in hell that I'll fall overboard."Well that's just tempting fate. Really? In the middle of a wind ripped lake, as waves are rocking your boat back and forth, while you do the incredibly stupid and perch yourself on the stern, assuring someone that no, you won't fall overboard? That's just asking to have some twist of circumstance push you overboard, isn't it?>Field is too long!
>>27026973So of course, right as you finish your boast, the boat quakes, your foot slips, and you find yourself and your pet suddenly plunged into water that is suprising warm. You suppose you have to thank the fact that it's the tail end of summer for that; it must not yet have cooled off from the heat of the month of August. Still, being suddenly submerged within lakewater is far from the most pleasant of experiences, and you would much appreciate the opportunity to go back and -not- screw around.If only so your clothes weren't wet anymore.Seriously, if you had been in your swim trunks, you'd probably be okay with this."Harry you -IDIOT-!" Hermione yells."Blech!" Anne moans, as she loses her lunch over the side of the retreating boat."Chocolate syrup?" Illya murmurs, still asleep. "And you want to... well now Harry... how could I say no to that~""Cholo," Gilgamesh curses. "I hate taking a swim. Always chills my blood down to the cartiledge when I get out... Get back to the boat."You...>Attempt to swim back to the boat, something well within your abilities.>Sit back and relax. The water's rather nice, and they'll send out someone eventually...>Feel something vaguely snake like wrapping around your torso.>[OTHER]
>>27026982>>Feel something vaguely snake like wrapping around your torso.
>>27026982Knife fight a giant squid.
>>27026982Back to the boat.Unless that tentacle isn't a giant squid and is instead a certain squid girl.
>>27026982>Attempt to swim back to the boat, something well within your abilities.And don't try to act casual. To those other 10 year olds kids we're already know as "that one kid who actually fell into the lake"
>>27026982yes im asking for it>Feel something vaguely snake like wrapping around your torso.if its a snake we could have a lake moster friend?
>>27027024Seconding the knife fight, assuming we don't actually injure the poor giant squid
>>27027043now we'll be know as that one kid who fought a lake monster and wonseriously, what could go wrong?
>>27027050i wonder if we can kill the water?
>>27026982>Feel something vaguely snake like around your Torso.The boy who lives can have a peaceful day when he's...actually all things considered even death won't be enough to give this boy peace.
>>27027068We would have to kill the lake...that would make many people unhappy and we might get detention.
>>27026982>the retreating boat.Hey, that's no fair! The boat won't leave without four people, but it's perfectly fine carrying on even without the full occupancy? Stupid boat.>Attempt to swim back to the boat, something well within your abilities.>Feel something vaguely snake like wrapping around your torso....it's our snake.>>27027043>To those other 10 year olds kids we're already know as "that one kid who actually fell into the lake"And for the next week, we were known as The Boy Who Slipped.
>>27027115>And for the next week, we were known as The Boy Who Slipped.Oh god, this is exactly how Snape is going to call us from now on.
>>27027109Well the component parts of the lake would still be there, and they don't know we can attack Concepts.
>>27027109but itd be worth it, if only for the looks on everyones faces
>>27026982>Attempt to swim back to the boat, something well within your abilities.Lets not fight the kraken on our first day here.
>>27027153we could just kill it into hydrogen and oxygentho that would be a potentialy deadly bomb if it doesnt dissapate fast enough, which it would
Well this is great.You can only imagine that from now on, you won't be known among your peers as the magically potente childe whom slew the Dark Lord with but a thought in his infancy. No, you can see the laughing and jeering faces dancing all around you, your newfound friends turning their backs on you. Life would be little different than it was back when you were in grade school, except now you wouldn't be known as Hairy Harry or Potty Wee Potter. Now you'll be known forever more as the Boy Who Slipped.You sulk there in the water, face down and blowing bubbles, ignoring your pet snake's requests for you to swim on and catch up with the boat as you wallow in your own self pity. Poor, poor Harry Potter - that sad, sad eleven year old boy who is cursed to see the deaths of everyone he loves, a loser whose hands are already tainted with blood. An indelible mark upon his soul, the mark of a...You are interrupted from your attempts at being emo by the fact that some vaguely snake like thing is wrapping around your torso."Hey Gil," you ask, hesitantly, "Tell me that you're wrapping yourself around my chest for warmth, and that's not some sort of lake monster getting ready to devour me...""I don't know about any lake monster, Harry, but I can be bloody sure that that's not me," Gil hisses into your ear. "I went for your shoulder - everysnake knows that tha's where the warmest part of a human is.""Oh," you say. "Bugger."You feel yourself being hoisted, up into the air. You have but a moment to react to the actions of this creature. You decide to...>Attack to kill! No lake monster will be getting the best of Harry James Potter! [ROLL 3d6]>Attack to incapacitate! You don't want to be eaten, but you've killed enough things today... [ROLL 3d6]>Sit back and enjoy the ride. It's not dragging you down into its maw to be devoured, is it now?>[OTHER]
>>27027349>Sit back and enjoy the ride. It's not dragging you down into its maw to be devoured, is it now?
>Sit back and enjoy the ride. It's not dragging you down into its maw to be devoured, is it now?We shouldn't attack him, he's just trying to help us out.
>>27027349"Sit back and enjoy the ride. I can't imagine a school wouldn't have safe guards in place for new students. Though keep on guard in case we need to kill it later
>>27027349Is it the Giant Squid? Hes friendly!
>>27027415He was friendly in the books, too. He helped out Dennis Creevey when he fell in in Harry's third year.
Rolled 2, 1, 2 = 5>>27027349>Attack to incapacitate! You don't want to be eaten, but you've killed enough things today...
>>27027349Sit back and enjoy the ride. It's not like it's pulling us under...and besides, they send a large group of (likely) sugared up children who are stir crazy from the train across these waters each year. Falling in must be reasonably common and non lethal.
Rolled 2, 6, 3 = 11>>27027349Attack the monster. We don't know what it is, so we better defend ourself.
>>27027349kill the lakeif not then sit back and have a peacefull conversation with it
Giant squids are among the foremost allies of man and I'm both shocked and horrified that any would consider attacking them.
>>27027349>Sit back and enjoy the ride. It's not dragging you down into its maw to be devoured, is it now?SURELY they wouldn't keep a hostile kraken in the same lake they make the entire first year class take a boat trip over on their first day, right?That just don't make any sense.
>>27027446>>27027468It seems like a perfectly reasonable test for a magus. If they can't make it across the lake with everything provided, they clearly don't deserve to stay.
>>27027349>sit back and enjoy the ridegetting picked up and put back in our boat is a pretty fair way to repair the reputation we just screwed up
>>27027468dude this is hogwart, look at the forest of doom thats right out backstill vote for relaxing
>>27027349>>Sit back and enjoy the ride. It's not dragging you down into its maw to be devoured, is it now?>Stay on guard nonetheless, because that's the magusly thing to do.Probably isn't the first time a student has fallen off the boat, and from what we know about these sorts of wizards, they probably would've thought it'd be a good idea to put a helpful giant squid in the lake to help fallen students rather than, y'know, just having the boats stop. Like a reasonable person would've.Though I guess there's something to be said for going with the over-the-top cool way of handling things as well....but that said, they have to be feeding the squid something, don't they? Time to hope it's not a randomly selected pool of school applicants.
>>27027508Something just occurred to me.If first year students being eaten by the squid was a thing that happened, Hermione would have been all like "NO HARRY WATCH OUT FOR THE GIANT MAN-EATING SQUID, I READ ABOUT THIS IN MY BOOKS!"Unless she just failed to mention it specifically to set up a situation where Kaleido-Pink needs to rescue us.Oh god... she's going to blast the squid on magical girl reflex isn't she?
>>27027545if she does i vote we kill the baton. no one fucks with our (possibly) snake buddies
Pissing off the owner of the tentacle isn't necessarily a good idea if it's not attacking you.
>>27027735It's grappling us, and thereby provoking and Attack of Opportunity. I intend to take it up on that offer.
>>27027760maybe it just lonely? maybe ol hagrid forgot he was there?
>>27027806or maybe we get moar waifus in our harem
>>27027806We know nothing about the squid or the Hagrid. This is clearly an attack on our person.
"TTTHHHEEERRREEE'SSS AAALLLWWWAAAYYYSSS OOONNNEEE IIISSSNNN'TTT TTTHHHEEERRREEE???"The voice you hear is long and drawn out, a deep and gutteral blubber that sounds like some six foot seven bass singer was speaking into a series of bubbly tubes. From what you can tell from its tone, it is halway split between amused and aggravated, like a parent or a sitter woke up in the morning to see the children in their care doing something as stupid as it is adorable. The voice is oddly reassuring, and you do hope that whatever spoke was the creature that currently has a grip on you."Um, hello?!" You call out."OOOHHH, TTTHHHAAATTT'SSS NNNEEEWWW!" The voice seems excited. "III'VVVEEE NNNEEEVVVEEERRR MMMEEETTT OOONNNEEE WWWHHHOOO CCCOOOUUULLLDDD TTTAAALLLKKK BBBAAACCCKKK BBBEEEFFFOOORRREEE! WWWHHHAAATTT'SSS YYYOOOUUURRR NNNAAAMMMEEE LLLIIITTTLLLEEE BBBRRROOOSSSEEEPPPHHH?"You see something rise from the deeps. Cthulhoid, a Kraken, a beast that belongs a thousand thousand leagues below the surfave of the ocean. Two onyx glinting eyes belying an alien and unknowable intelligence a thousand years old, a chittering beak-maw speaking in a black tongue that your gift of Parseltongue can barely make sense of. It opens, and beneath its words you hear a song-call of ten thousand thousand thousand burning souls and the consumption of this world by the uncaring entropic nothingness.You call out to it, a point of light shining against the darkness. It pitch and florid tentacles pass you from one to another as you speak, moving you in some non-euclidean pattern that does not actually bend the fabric of space and time. But oh boy would it be cool if it did."Umm! Harry! My name is Harry! Harry James Potter!">My field! It is too long!
>>27027878It's eyes blink once. In this blink, you see the fires of creation, reflected glories of an age long past. A more perfect time, before Man degenerated into this pale shadow of its species, save for a fragmented handful of the old clans that struggled against their decay."CCCOOOLLLIIIOOO, LLLIIITTTLLLEEE HHHAAARRRYYY! III'MMM XXXGGGLLLUUUBBBFFFNNNIIICCCKKK, TTTHHHOOOUUUGGGHHH MMMYYY BBBRRROOOSSSEEEPPPHHHSSS CCCAAALLL MMMEEE GGGLLLUUUBBB.">Nice to meet you Mr. Glub! What's it like, being a lake kraken?>A pleasure! Though, would you terribly mind putting me down?>IA, IA XGLUBFNICK FHTAGN! THE BLACK SQUID OF THE LAKE WITH A THOUSAND YOUNG!
>>27027847we are NOT going harem on thisbut i would love for a giant squid/snake friendimagine the faces of the other first years when it gently sets us on shore infront of everyone
>>27027886>>IA, IA XGLUBFNICK FHTAGN! THE BLACK SQUID OF THE LAKE WITH A THOUSAND YOUNG!There's no reason to not say this.
>>27027886>IA, IA XGLUBFNICK FHTAGN! THE BLACK SQUID OF THE LAKE WITH A THOUSAND YOUNG!
>>27027886>>A pleasure! Though, would you terribly mind putting me down?So Krakens are actually a type of snake, huh.You learn something new everyday
>>27027886umm this?>IA, IA XGLUBFNICK FHTAGN! THE BLACK SQUID OF THE LAKE WITH A THOUSAND YOUNG!unless it hostile, then this>Nice to meet you Mr. Glub! What's it like, being a lake kraken?
>>27027878>>27027886Okay, now I'm thinking this isn't actually Parseltongue and is something else entirely, that also lets us talk to snakes.Anyway.>>A pleasure! Though, would you terribly mind putting me down?And be sure to thank him and promise to come out to the lake every once in a while to chat.
>>27027886>A pleasure! Though, would you terribly mind putting me down?
>>27027931We can only barely understand it because it is only barely related to the tongues we speak; we're probably still speaking Parseltongue.Also, we've found yet another reason to have taken Space way back when.
>>27027935so doe op take first to 3? or does he count? or does he just wait for consensus?got mixed signal from the archives
>>27027893b-b-but why ?
>>27027886I hope the "thousand young" part isn't like calling it a whore. Also, it seems like a dude, so... I don't know man.
>>27027961becasue illyanot only that but kerry would actualy kill us if we even thought about another woman
>>27027976It's probably intended to be a joking reference.
>>27027886>>Nice to meet you Mr. Glub! What's it like, being a lake kraken?
>>27027987FHTAGNPart of a phrase in HP Lovecraft's Cthulhu mythos. Translates roughly to, "dreams," "sleeps," or "waits."
>>27027893Are you against harem in general, or just adding the squid?Because, while I love Ilya and wouldn't let her go, if Second Magic Shenanigans happens I want to get in on some Triumvirate of One.
>>27027961HMMMM, I WONDER?
>>27028019Page 9, we're sinking like R'lyeh.
>>27027886>Nice to meet you Mr. Glub! What's it like, being a lake kraken?He hasn't had anyone to talk to in a while, lets be polite.
>>27027886>Nice to meet you Mr. Glub! What's it like, being a lake kraken?
>>27027886Nice to meet you
>>27028013in general, though some certian situitations can pull it offits really about if the characters would actually be up for it and it not just forced. in this case while illya may joke like she does, she would actualy be apart of a harem, we are to high maintenece for her to look at others. she would be down for a threesome later in life though
>IA, IA XGLUBFNICK FHTAGN! THE BLACK SQUID OF THE LAKE WITH A THOUSAND YOUNG!so basicaly this says "here waits/sleeps/dreams glub, the black squid of the lake with a thousand young
===TEACH ME TONKS-SENPAI==="Tonks-senpai, Tonks-senpai!" You run into the room, tripping over the wire of Tonks-Senpai's controller, disconnecting it from her favorite video game. "So are Krakens actually a type of snake? Huh? Huh?""Ohohoho~!" Tonks-Senpai replies mischeviously, the malicious glint in her eyes not at all related to the fact that you broke her SNES. "That's a very good question, Anon-kun! Unfortunately, the answer is rather complex, and full of Nasu-type conceptual bullshittery!""But what does that have to do with anything?" You ask, bamboozled by the apparent non-sequitir. "They're conceptually a snake?""No! But they are conceptually a Dragon!" Tonks explains patiently to her thick skulled student. "You see, Dragons - often known as Wyrms - are related to snakes on a conceptual level. Many of their roots - especially their reputation for evil and their association with Satan - are born from the myth of the Snake of Eden! Krakens, conceptually, are the dragons of the seas. Where Parseltongues can understand a Dragon like an American talking to a Brit, a Parseltongue can understand a kraken like an American talking to an english speaker from china!"
>>27028067On the plus side, trying to understand the Death of an Outside thing should help us better understand the nature of reality or something like that and give us more SAN loss.
>>27028031 New thread ahoy. Also,>Nice to meet you Mr. Glub.
>>27028094The more you know!
>>27028094Thanks, Tonks-senpai! Now I know!
>>27028031Wait shit, are we on Auto Sage already?Bugger.I'll make a new thread then, after I refresh the archives.
>>27028123For 120 posts already
>>27028094This is amazing
>>27028094Thanks, Tonks-Sempai!So then we're doing more intelligent dragons than in the HP canon, where they're essentially hungry beasts.
>>27028123We were autosaging by the time you got back from helping your friend.
>>27028143intelligent is a relative term, look at the snakes in cannon. theyre smart but still like snakes
>>27028168Why would you put a snake in a cannon?Thats animal abuse, you monster!Apologize to snakes!
>>27028168True, but if Parseltongue worked on HP dragons, that one challenge of the Triwizard Tournament would have gone a lot differently. Also the breaking of Gringotts in the last book.
So during the triwiztourneything we're just going to casually talk with the dragon and request an egg?Are we going to flirt with dragon milf and win the task just like fuckin that?
Rolled 14>>27028201>>27028195rollin to seduce
>>27028188we'd never put Gil in a cannon
tell me, whats so bad about auto-sage that makes most GMs avoid it like the plauge? is it cause it wont be on page zero?its not like we're gonna 404 for awhile
>>27028303Actually, we're on page 9, so we will 404 in a few minutes to a half hour.
>>27028303We're on page 9, actually, so we're fairly close.
>>27028336>>27028338id say minimum of an hourbleach quest used to run well over a thousand till we were the last on page 10
>>27028303It's not Auto Sage that had me worried, it's that we're Auto-Sageing on page nine.
>>27028201I was hoping we could do this in front of a terrified crowd of Wizards, though.
>>27028363Well yeah, and Shadow Quest goes to 1500+ post every thread, but this is a much slower paced thread than either Bleach or Shadow.
>>27028363It also runs late at night during the least busy hours./tg/ runs MUCH faster during the day.
>>27028369>tourney starts, we walk out of the tent>calmy approach the dragon>kill its fire>talk it down>seduce it>weasly twins make a fortune>we get egg
You realize what this means though, right?VOLDEMORT CAN ALSO TALK TO DRAGONS.
>>27028417>second match>enter lake>have our new friend glubb help>save Illya>take her on a date through the lake
>>27028456Voldemort's an immortal, shapeshifting demi-lich with an extreme grasp on True Magic. I really want to see how he's going to get buffed, though, and how much it'll bite us in the ass.
>>27028473>Third task>Enter hedge maze>cut our way through>Enter graveyard and shit hits the fan>Kerry brings close air support>asks us if we've been following the five minute rule
>>27028493hell yeahi wouldnt do justice to kerry coming after illya gets kidknapped
>>27028493What would Iri do? her future grankids would be on the line after all. Anybody have an idea of what her response would be?
>>27028493>asks us if we've been following the five minute rule2 seconds later, a new record is set for fastest sprint speed
>>27028590>Implying she isn't the one driving.
>>27028611>>27028590>implying iri isnt scarier than kerry when it comes to protecting things she lovesthat bitch is like Unohana
>>27028480Well besides the Parseltongue buff, he's probably going to have at least a basic understanding of the Magus side of magic so we shouldn't rely on him making typical Wizard mistakes.I'm still betting on him having gone full Dead Apostle.
>>27028590She'd probably chuck magical explosive concoctions or vials of insanely strong acid at our enemies.
>>27028667his only powerful spell is avdacadbra, we winor we make him rewrite his entire spell book to fight us
>>27028709Well, we've no-selled AK twice now. Canon Voldy is kind of stupid, but I doubt he's stupid enough here to keep trying to kill us with a spell that literally hit us dead on and did absolutely NOTHING.
>>27028709This is wrong to the point that it's not worth discussing.
>>27028709I honestly have no idea why he ever used that spell. In fact, it only seemed very good for terrorist mooks.
>>27028922 New thread, folks!
>>27028789Watch, he tries to pull the ritual spell at the end of Goblet of Fire and then AK's us, only for the spell to still *DO* nothing to us."Getting real tired of your shit, Riddle"