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Spell List

Feel free to reroll or support existing suggestions if none are successful. Invalid suggestions are ignored in the counting. Very small questions or actions may be answered without a page.

Fuck I forgot to put text adventure quest in the title again.

Archive: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive.html?tags=Text%20Adventure

Twitter: @tgtextadventure

bump

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>>26858696
whoops.

Will bump occasionally with highlights

Bump of support. Kept up with the quest through the archive. Have class soon, keep up the good work op.

>>26858764
Thanks.

Just gonna chill and bump every now and then until regulars see this.

>>26858803
suggest a threeway

>>26858912
Roll

Rolled 14

>>26858941
>>26858912

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>>26858995

>>26859091

Find Elyria, explain how screwed up things got with minotaur marital traditions. We had no idea about any of that.

Meanwhile, how is she? Is she hurt?

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>>26859194

>>26859294
>Stop whining about sex. We have a minotaur tribe after our heads.
Send off a skellington diplomat.

Also: we got the alliance on alert now. One of those spheres flew of to that big city. Hoolios, or what it's name is.

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>>26859310

Rolled 9

>>26859409
MIND CONTROL ATTEMPT. GO.

>>26859450
FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK.

>>26859450
Dicegods. Why? Why are we punished like this?

>>26859473
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QJNU3Zddt30
THE JEWS, I TELL YOU.

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>>26859450

Rolled 2

>>26859569
Attempt to GRECO-ROMAN WRESTLE out of the grip and pin her.

>>26859631
Well, fuck, do we break our own bones?

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>>26859631
Also I wanted to pull a move similar to pic related.

Rolled 18

>>26859637
First even ending post, so lemme try save this
>>26859569
Attempt to mind control them both

>>26859673
EMPEROR BLESS YOU.

Rolled 20

>>26859682
That post doesn't count. Or if one would reroll for it, the dice roll of 18 wouldn't.

So. Fuck it I'm rerolling for this >>26859673 guys idea. There's nothing what could go wrong I believe.

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>>26859720

>>26859720
The random number god has blessed us

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>>26859720

Rolled 11

>>26859802
find an unconcious guard
gently slide your cock into his mouth

>>26859802
heal self

>>26859862
Don't do it.

>>26859862
There are no unconscious guards.

This is invalid, thank god.

>>26859802
find grave yard raise army

>>26859888
All the dead in the area have already risen to your aid. They stand in your army in the village square.

>>26859802
Find out why did dodo leave earth.

>>26859912
than heal our selves and see how many people we just got control of

>>26859912
We should release control of Elyria when she comes around.

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>>26859932

>>26860023

Tell her that she had too much to drink, but shouldn't worry about it.

Then start caressing her.

>>26860036
>Caress them both.
FTFY.

Rolled 6

>>26860023
claim to be a eunuch, this way we can escape being her mate

>>26860077
second

>>26860071

Even better!

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>>26860036

>>26860205
OUR MINDS ARE INTERWOVEN. CREATE THE TRIUMVIRATE

>>26860205
"I think there's been a few misunderstandings here"

Need an even or the third odd reply guys

Rolled 18

>>26860205
Attempt to regain control

>>26860367

Seconding this.

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>>26860399

>>26860454
Keep the minotaur bitch mindless until we find something to do with her, free Elyria of our control.

Rolled 10

>>26860454
Try to not fuck up

>>26860454
THREESOME.

Rolled 10

This: >>26860477
Also,What is with the guards we controlled?

>>26860477

This.

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>>26860490
Threesome with completely mindcontrolled puppets.
Sure sounds exciting.

>>26860454
get daya to agree to break shit off
lightly fuck with her head if we need to

>>26860503
They were killed in the monstergirl fight outside the facility. The girls didn't distinguish between them and the others.

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>>26860490

>>26860508
>Mindbreak
>Not completely fucking sexy

Taking a half hour break. Be back soon

>>26860678
Noice.

Rolled 15

>>26860678

Try and mindbend them in their sleep into not wanting to kill eachother/you.

>>26860678
Communicate telepathically

Ask them if they have calmed down enough to be allowed their brain privileges back.

Rolled 19

>>26860713
yea its nap time after this prepare a defense and rule of the city, then plan the take over of the next alliance city

>>26860678
>She moos

Lold at that, everything else is berry nice indeed.

>>26860678
Let's go back adventuring, take our revenge on the Jester. It's been too long since we last adventured.

>>26860984
We have to bitchslap the alliance first.

Then we can descend on the Jester with all the fury of an angry god with an army of monstergirls and skeletons

>>26861021
No, man, we need to fight something, get in some danger, get some insane rolls, do some crabwalking, all that shit

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Not because I need to but because I want to

Well? What do we do?

Rolled 2

>>26861903
well in terms of playing this >>26860756 is the valid post. But I don't know where OP is.

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>>26860756

And we're back. Sorry for the late return, had some internet troubles.

Explain the situation to the girls? How we are all connected now and what not maybe?

>>26862131
Well ok. If she gets too annoying we can just get rid of her like we did of the rest of her family
>implying we care

>>26862131
Okay, well now that that's settled, let's go home and plan our next adventure.
I want to check on
The skeledog
The skeletroll
The three skeleguards (not exactly skelegntons)

>>26862131
Can you give us an overviwe of the current situation?
I'm kind of out of out of the loop.

>>26862233
>>26862234
These are compatible yes?

>>26862234

Go through the archives and read the first post of each thread. I recap the previous chapter.

>>26862233
This.
Also bring our Army. We'' march into town as victors (and as advertisement for our new and diverse brothel back in business)

Need an even reply or third valid odd reply for this >>26862131

>>26862315
Then I'm just gonna re-roll for this guy >>26862233

>>26862233
The skeledog is captured or dead.
The skeletroll is part of your army
The skeleguards are dead, killed by the monster girls

You heard about a new Jester cave, and a snake problem in Belltown a couple chapters ago.
>What do you do?

>>26862430
Let's get a little organized first. Get into our town, reopen the brothel get guards and scouts going.
If we can send some sneaky propaganda with the 'benefits' of joining us to neaby villages that are not in the Alliance yet.

Then we can go adventuring
Snake problem?
>Ara ara~

>>26862430
We overrun the Jester, of course. That asshole.

>>26862430
Let's see what happens if we let the two go for now. We need to find a way to deal with our problems that isn't mind control.

>>26862430
>Jester Cave

Fffffuck that guy. Let's go steal his shit.

>Snake problem

On the other hand, lamiae.

>>26862466
But yeah, this first.

>>26862466
>>26862479

Hora Hora

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>>26862505
We all know what's coming.

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>>26862466

Rolled 7

>>26862562
Stand up on a pedestal. Ready your shouting voice and charisma. Announce to the town that Mr. Bone's Brothel is back in business with new tastes, as well as security service.

>>26862576
Ok that's the plan for dealing with the people.

What about logistics? You have several hundred assorted monsters.

>>26862505
Better yet, ORAORAORAORAORAORAORA!

>>26862594
"WHO WANTS TO HAVE SEX"

>>26862562
Speak with the major, say we run this shit now. He can do most the political and organisational stuff, give him pretty free reign but also make clear that we run this. The town is now free of the alliance, blabla. Tell him to gather support for our cause.
We appoint our skeletons to wall and patrol duty, 24/7. The catgirls that are better at fighting come with us, that one leather girl (totallynotcatwoman) can train our militia. There have to be some former guards left, appoint the experienced ones to train a regular militia, benefits include cheap entry into our reopened brothel.
Other than that our town runs normally. Explicitly forbid the girls (especially cats) to rape townspeople at random.

>>26862594
It kinda sucks having to type out longer stuff since people will get the short and stupid blurts out much easier and faster.

>>26862656

Which is why I leave it to chance. It seems to have worked out in this case.

>>26862656
As for logistics, if it really comes to that, offer free sex to the man who cares to quarter one of our girls (and death to man who mistreats them). This adds to advertise. Keep the more dangerous ones at our personal place.

Later, we'll earn enough cash to make a brothel proper.

>>26862684
I can samefag something stupid 3 times faster than I can type out a paragraph though.

>>26862686
Our mansion/brothel is freaking huge though, with an even bigger park. Most of the girls prefer to stay outside anyway.
I don't think space is a problem.

>>26862562
"I'M MAYOR NOW.

I HEREBY DECLARE THIS TOWN TO BE A FREE HAVEN FOR MONSTERGIRLS AND HUMANS.

FUCK THE ALLIANCE Y'ALL! ALSO I WOULD APPRECIATE IT IF YOU ALL KEPT THE RAPING TO AN ABSOLUTE MINIMUM SO THAT I DON'T HAVE TO REMOVE YOUR BRAIN PRIVILEGES."

Set up skellington patrols and guards. Also, equal opportunity employment for monstergirls and humans in positions of government.

>>26862727
OP said there was an issue of logisitics, I presumed that was the case.

If not, is food an issue? Having the town feed them out of their own pocket for now would be good.

>>26862756
Well we threw the alliance out, which no doubt used the resources of the town as well, and it was still running apparently.

If anything our girls take less food than the alliance, especially if sufficiently supplied with semen.

>>26862705

True but if that truly becomes a problem I can just invalidate the retard posts.

Maybe we could look if the phylacterys are still there. If so we can examine and learn to create them.

>>26862790
That is a terribly good idea.

Put "quest" in the OP so it can be filtered.

OP can you be more specific about these logistical issues?

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>>26862656
>>26862686

>>26862853
Space and nothing else. Most of the monstergirls live off semen and eat and drink as a treat.

>>26862825
I forgot, sorry.

I didn't realise people filtered these quests out so often.

>>26862933
1.) Send scouting parties consisting of girls and guards to other towns with both flyers and offers of meceranry work.
2.) Also look for some good engineer's and builders, and offer both cash and sex to design and build a brothel
3.) Post a bounty for the Jester. A big one. Like "free sex for life to the man who captures him alive, 50 years dead"

>>26862933
Can we get a quick description of all our left over girls fighting skills? And if you like (you apparently do) also their appearance?

>>26862965
Most people don't, but the ones who do get really, really pissy about it if even one slips through.

>>26862994
They use our luxurious mansion for now, I think that's pretty good already, we just need more room. How about just expanding it and putting maybe a bar or something into it too?

>>26862933
Acquire slimegirl waifu, send the others off to do whatever they want but preferably find a job doing something.

>>26863006
The three alraunes each have different skin tones, pink, white, and yellow. Petals protrude from their body, forming rudimentary clothing that flap as they move around. They are all have short hair, with petalled crowns.

The blue-slime girl is a translucent, young girl made of blue jelly. She breathes bubbles of air, that visibly float into her body and dissipate, evidentally sustaining her weird form of respiration.

The immortal is a totally normal 12 year old girl, except that she is actually 485 years old, and cannot die by any known means. She is regenerative and wise far beyond her visible years.

The succubi are horned and tattooed intricately over their mostly exposed bodies. Each is winged, with a horned tail and shorts horns sprouting from their silver hair. Naturally they are all incredibly attractive, and ooze sexuality constantly.

The three catgirls are little more than children, useless in a fight for sure. They giggle among themselves.

>>26862994
No bounties for the Jester. He's ours and ours alone.

>>26863114
I don't want to go near the guy again, not after last time.
If we really want him that badly, then lower the bounty dead to 10 years.

>>26862933
We're gonna have to deal with Taya eventually.

>>26863107
>The immortal is a totally normal 12 year old girl, except that she is actually 485 years old, and cannot die by any known means.

I take her and a part of skeletons into the jester dungeon, to fuck him up.

>>26862933
Expand the mansion.

Begin plans to turn the entire town into one huge, never-ending party. A party so good that the alliance won't fuck with us because they might get left out.

>>26863107
I missed a chapter or 2, what happened to our cat girl army?

also, archive where?

>>26863107
Ok, the loli, the succubs (I assume the wings are functional) the slime and the alraunes could be useful. Furhtermore I think we should also take Katya with us on adventures.
Anyone else I'm forgetting before we go snake hunting?
>hora hora hora

>>26863143
>Implying she won't conspire with him, a fellow immortal, and make a deal and they fuck us both
I say we keep a close eye on her. Befriend her if possible.

Treat her with the respect she deserves if she does have the intellect and wisdom of the centuries. Offer her whatever she wants, she can choose not to have sex, ect.

>>26863167
The catgirls are supreme distraction tools. Don't underestimate that.

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>>26862994

ARCHIVE: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive.html?tags=Text%20Adventure

TWITTER: @tgtextadventure

>>26863238
Get to know the immortal better.

>>26863238
Gather our party, investigate snake problem.
We take with us the immortal (attempt to become friends), the succubi, the slime, the 3 catgirls and the alraunes.

>>26863260
Oh and Katya too, I want to get to know her too.

>>26863238
>disregard bitches
>acquire power

I, FOR ONE, HAVE NOT FORGOTTEN, GEORGE, JIMBO, HEADLESS AND SKULL MACE AND I WANT THEM BACK.

Back to our lair to study necromancy.

>>26863280
Money is power. Sex is Money.

We need resources if we're going to go scouting for more dead things.

Also, we haven't forgotten them and that terrible accident. George's skull is hangs in honor on our belt (alive too I bet).

>>26863312
Money won't help you stop fucking up those necromancy rolls that cost you your entire army and one hand.

>>26863337
No. But it does provide skeletons, cadavers, armies, useful things.

Still, increasing our personal skill should be a priority.

In Chap 4 there was the Quastion, if we still have Georges head on our belt. Well... do we, OP?

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>>26863250

>>26863350
George had an esteemed place in your basement, but it was ransacked by the alliance. You assume it was destroyed by the alliance when they realised a chattering skull was useless.

>>26863384
Remind her that anything she wants, she gets. Also ask how goods her sword arm, or any kind of weaponry, and if she's interested in following our adventure personally.

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>>26863409
They killed george.
They KILLED GEORGE

>>26863409
No....

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>>26863434
Well, he was a skull to begin with. But I guess you shouldn't speak ill of the dead.

>>26863409
>>26863434
Huh? Feorge was already dead before, and we had his Skull on our belt, i believe. Well I'll be watching it up

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>>26863414

Rolled 14

Go back to liar, read up on necromancy, recreate George, Jimbo and Skullmace.

>>26863528
>>26863547
This, but also ask some of the alliance guards if they know who sacked the town and if any of them personally went into our house.

There's still hope to find George. Never forget.

>>26863528
We need to talk to Elyria I should think. We can't just mind control all our problems.

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>>26863562

http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/26809233/#p26811751
http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/26809233/images/1377393027699.png
Well, we had him on our Belt, until we became unconcious for quite a time. But just details.
Anyways. He's gone. Alliance threw it away, since it was just a dead skull to them.

Also to the matters at hand: reroll for >>26863547

>>26863637
Give them appropriate wear.
A captains helm for Jimbo.
Armor for Mace
George get's a robe/cape/accessory thing, he'll be our personal assistant.

Go to the dungeon. It's MAGIC time. I say we try to repeat our first experiment with a moderate amount of skeletons (none of the named ones) and read every single page of the book.

>>26863644
Disregard this. My internet went nuts for a moment.

Maybe we can enhance the Skullmaces Weapon with our majick

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>>26863670

>>26863730
>Jester's New Cave
wot? I hope you mean ours.

>>26863730
I think he meant we go to our dungeon to become better at magics.

>>26863753
Did dungeon not mean the Jesters new dungeon?

Rolled 15

>>26863813
>Go to the dungeon. It's MAGIC

Pretty sure he wants to make a huge fucking skeleton golem again, but without our named guys.

>>26863813
Prolly not. I mean I'm just saying it because I really want to go investigate those snakes.

But we should train first.

Rolled 7, 13, 1, 12 = 33

>>26863900
Attempt another bonegolem. This time nothing that is autonomous, just a big fuck you button we can push.
Also become better at the whole "control skeleton while still alive thing" I think this could be very useful.

Rolled 2

>>26863928
You just had to roll all 4 dice on your own, didn't you?

>>26863973
You're not helping either.

>>26863928
Oh dear.
OP, don't forget we have +2s for some of these.

>>26863928
I just wanted a fuck huge skeleton man. Now we're gonna get a fucking skeleton dog or something like those assholes in Dark Souls in the Tomb.

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>>26863928

>>26864091
I imagine a bone golem to be nothing but a fuckhuge skeleton. And even if we get a dog, why not? Sounds awesome.

>>26864143
Recover for weeks, read up on necromancy to get +x to rolls. Try again.

>>26863999
My bad, doesn't change the outcome.

Only the bonesmithing first value gets the +2

>>26864143
Welp. At least it's gonna fuck up the alliance good.
We recover, let's get to know that particular catgirl.


>>26864174
I think we should stop with the constructs. It is simply not meant to be.

>>26864189
>I think we should stop with the constructs. It is simply not meant to be.

You can't stop it now. The bone golem is happening. You can't prevent it.

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>>26864174

Rolled 4, 1, 12, 3, 15 = 35

>>26864274
Rollin'

Rolled 20, 16, 2, 4, 18 = 60

>>26864274
HAHA, TIME FOR 1S

Rolled 13, 7, 8, 19, 16 = 63

>>26864274
Lord have mercy

Rolled 11, 2, 17, 2, 6 = 38

>>26864274
It's HAPPENING

>>26864291
You motherfucker

Rolled 1, 15, 14, 5, 20 = 55

>>26864274

PAPA NEEDS SHOES

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>>26864307
This one wins, right?

Is it happening?

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>>26864307
Thank god.

>>26864329
First linked or unattatched roll.

Sorry

>>26864342
I thought it was first even or 3rd odd?

Bullshit!

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>>26864342
We are so dead.

>>26864342
>If OP requests a roll, the next roll linked to the action, or the next unattached roll is used.

captcha: indicates failure

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When we survive that we shoild totally build this.
Pic stolen from /vg/

>>26864475
>helilich.jpg
>not skelekopter.jpg

apply yourself

>>26864291
>deja vu

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>>26864567

>>26864567
don't tease us like this man

>>26864368
I thought you meant the roll linked to the winning action, which is always the third odd or first even ending post number. I'm confus, Mr Bones. But w/e, it's your adventure.

Rolled 12

>>26864587
Telekinesis it into the sky, through the roof, and hope the fall fucks it up.

Rolled 8

>>26864587
Oh no, not our floor!

Cast mind control at it, and get our skeletons in here. Or whoever is near and can help us.
Where is that damn cat when you need her?

>>26864587
If we ever. EVER. try to make one of these again (and we won't for a LONG time) I demand we build a containment facility to house these loosed creatures. We can't just let them run off willy nilly with all our power when we can hold them, sihponit back, and possibly break their loyalty.

>>26864607
>Third odd ending post or first even ending post
>Action is locked in
>Requesting a roll
>First roll linked to me or the action, or first unattached roll is used, no need to wait for the third odd/first even.

Otherwise we would be here all day. The rules are established in the OP and I never bend them to prevent controversy/.

>>26864587
Feed Elyria to it.

I ain't raising no kids.

Rolled 3

>>26864659
Well, perhaps, but in this case, this was kind of a special scenario, because aside from the roll, someone could have described what they want the extra D20 to be used at.

>>26864655
Why not use the alliance town's facility? They seem to had things set up pretty well, they even had nocromancer oriented rooms and equipment.
The hell are we doing practificing necromancy under a brothel?

>>26864682
We're not very bright.

>>26864655
Shit I also had the idea of building a safe place for building monstrositys last night. totally forgot about it.

I just remembered this exists, do you think we should try make it?
http://supocalypse.wikia.com/wiki/Double_Skeletal_Dragon

>>26864698
We're a fantastic pimp, tactician, manipulator, healer.

We're good at everything but Necromancy.

>>26864732
Only after we
a). build a wizard facility proper
b). take over the wizard facility proper in alliance town
c). fucking STUDY necromancy, holy crap

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>>26864634

>>26864732
>http://supocalypse.wikia.com/wiki/Double_Skeletal_Dragon
>30 meters long
>weighs 2 tons

PFHAHAHAHA

>>26864732
You know if you build that you will immediately have to fight it.

Rolled 19

>>26864772
DICE GODS. HEAR OUR PLEA

Rolled 18

>>26864772
force/darkness push!

Rolled 11

>>26864772
Pull it apart with shadows

Rolled 10

>>26864772
Dive in the shadows to get into a better position
>>26864804
Holy crap, we found our Dice God Cleric

>>26864804
So, uh...... this is the first even response to the post. But... what's the action? Just "get lucky"?

>>26864820
Taking this one guys.

Rolled 16

>>26864834
No, we clearly rolled 19 for divine intervention.

>>26864834
Fair enough.

>>26864843
I agree. We rolled 19 for Lady Luck's meddling

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>>26864820

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>>26864955
Call the cavalry, guards, minotaurs, everyone (why didn't we prepare this earlier).

"Bring it down! Bring it down! Bring it down!"

Rolled 4

>>26864955
Restrain it with shadows to make it easier for her to kill it.

Rolled 13

>>26864978
Well. At least it's not a 1.

>>26864977
>why didn't we prepare this earlier
Seriously. Two critifuckups, weeks of healing, and we haven't learnt our lesson?

>>26865010
Of course not, we are more than only slightly retarded.

>>26865010
Dude, don't you want a golem?

>>26865030
I want a golem.
But I also want us to be able to make one in the first place. And not to get massively fucked over if we fail.

Next time, we're using the alliance facility. If we're going to ever do a next time.

>>26865048
>If we're going to ever do a next time.

No brakes on the retard train.

>>26865030
Hey yeah, now that I think about i.... NO, WAIT, THAT'S THE KIND OF THOUGHT PROCCESS THAT GOT US ON THIS SITUATION IN THE FIRST PLACE! Altough yeah, bone golems...

>>26865048
>implying that as soon as we survive we aren't trying again

You can't stop it.

Rolled 16

>>26865085
Plus, once we have a bone golem, he can help us make more bone golems and subdue the failures and sex up the monster girls!

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>>26864978
ROLLS

>>26865118
For that, we'll use the Rape Troll as the base.

Hey, OP.... doesn't the extra d20 you gave us in >>26864274 make us *more* likely to critfail? Isn't that kind of a problem, given how massively we've fucked up every single one of these?

Rolled 10

>>26865123
Dark Energy crush all three of it's skulls.

Rolled 16

>>26865123
Attempt to peer into the creatures mind with every last bit of magic we have.

Rolled 11

>>26865123
Attempt to pull the mind fragment we put into it back into us.

>>26865148
That dice determines ability. So a critfail would give it a slightly detrimental ability that it would have to use.

In addition to the critical rolls, you seem to end up with them in the control step of construction, which is done in the same order every time.

>>26865189
Yes, but if we critfail at any stage of the process we're kind of screwed. (And apparently the DC for each individual roll is really quite high even with our +2. What are the actual success/failure boundaries? Can you tell us that much, at least?)

There better be some coitus at the end of this, or this is going to be the shittiest day we've ever had.

>>26865259
Surely we've had plenty in our weeks of healing.
On another good note, we should be extremely wealthy by now.

>>26865259
How about surviving this day first?

>>26865309
We have other priorities.

>>26865278
I don't know about that wealthy part, we kind of trash our mega brothel every month trying to make yet another construct.

>>26865278
Not if we're knocking crystal chandeliers off the ceiling.

Also, why aren't regular whores plotting against us? They must be plotting against us...

>>26865342
Who cares about them?

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>>26865160

>>26865342
What makes you think there are regular whores at all? This is a place where sex is almost always commonplace. Walk into any woods and you can find a sexy-crazed monster girl.

>>26865342
Well shit, I never even thought about the regular whores, I mean we never mention them, but I'm pretty sure we have those.

RECOVER
STUDY NECROMANCY
DO IT AGAIN
I WILL HAVE A BONE GOLEM, OR DIE TRYING
FINAL DESTINATION

>>26858529
Fucking put quest in your fucking quest threads

>>26865377
ugh, well at least somebody is impressed with how we fight, not our necromancy skills.

We need to get out of this place. How's that job hunt going?

>>26865392
It was one mistake dude, this is the first time.

>>26865248
each roll is a stage
1. Body Construction
2. Power
3. Mind and It's control over its body
4. Loyalty
5. Magical ability.

So the dark creature failed mind, and thus barely had one, and also failed loyalty.

Success depends on the difficulty of construct, but generally below a 50% total value it gets bad.

Constructs are powerful, and therefore hard to create. They also make badass boss fights.

>>26865377
Recover and attempt to create tiny Bone flying scouts

>>26865377
Let's assemble a team to go investigate that snake problem. I'm tired of this place.

>>26865392
qq

>>26865377
Alright there guys, let's try out those Alliance facilities, maybe they have some kind of room you can flood with positive energy, kills the baddy and heals any cuts they made? How 'bout it?

Rolled 13

>>26865377
make another

>>26865378
>what makes you think there are regular whores at all?

Mostly paranoia. Also because we can't get that stinking rich without attracting SOME attention, so I'm constantly worrying that someone is targeting Mr. Bones even if we can't see them, which is perfectly reasonable. That's just another form of paranoia isn't it?

>>26865435
Stop already.
It has lost its humor long ago.

>>26865377
Also, what would be a rough guesstimate of our stats, from what I can glean we must have hella crazy dex and strength, no wis or cha, and maybe a bit of int.

>>26865452
You can't stop it.

>>26865460
>and maybe a bit of int.

Haha, no, none at all.

>>26865460

Low actual strength
High dexterity since you pick up rogueish qualities from dark magic
Low wisdom, fucks reliability
High intelligence, potential for powerful magic is high
Charisma, pretty poor. Generally get sex by mindbreaking, getting raped, or reward,

>>26865460
No cha? The leader of the catgirls only slept with us because she tought we were pretty, we have plenty of cha. We're the chaest

>>26865495
>High intelligence
How come we make such bad decisions and planning then?

>>26865511
High intelligence, low wisdom. Read again

>>26865511
We're not very wise

>>26865511
That's your fucking fault.

>>26865507
Low charisma doesnt mean ugly, and a horny catgirl does not a handsome man make.

>>26865511
Well, its because WE play the character.

>>26865540
I'd say we're more of the embodiment of non-existent wisdom. I mean sure we know how many spiders you can fill a vagina with, but what application could that ever have?

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>>26865422

>>26865566
>I mean sure we know how many spiders you can fill a vagina with
We do? Ought to make some spider skeletons one day and see if we're right.

But beyond that, who else things a horde hive of tiny spider skeletons to unleash on your foe is a good idea?

>>26865566
Well none since it's not actually that many spiders. I remember it was somewhere around 130, no?

Shit is the quest going downhill in quality? The suptg votes are dropping like a brick.

>>26865603
What's the status on our great job/mercenary hunt? Any of the guards report anything?

>>26865611
>spider
>skeleton

You know that is going to look like a normal spider because exoskeleton?

>>26865621
>waah, write quest in your title or imma downboat you >:(

>>26865621
Relax, there's always this group that likes to downvote every new quest or something. Mentioning it doesn't help either.

I like the quest as is.

>>26865603
Consult with Daya, Elyra, and the Immortal on what our next move should be.

>>26865621
/tg/ now hates quests if you haven't noticed

>>26865618
I haven't actually saved that image, but 130 spiders could potentially cause a ruckus, I mean just one widow spider usually gets people to scamper about.

>>26865645
It'll still be pretty fucking awesome.
On another note, does that mean we can control any bug we happen to see?

>>26865603
Ask the Immortal how not to fuck up our Necromancy.

>>26865679
Let's keep to skeletons, gooey bits lead to situations like Skullmace Jr.

>>26865676
Does it? Thing is tiny and slow.
I'd want to get some big, fast ones. Big ass Wolf spider or something.

>>26865679
Yes actually. We can also control everything with an endoskeleton. Just bend manipulate the bones like we want, or even easier bend one leg a little bit in the wrong direction. I assume pretty much everyone would listen to us after that.

>>26865621
How many times must I say it? Don't pay attention to the votes because they mean nothing nowadays.

>>26865763
Seriously.

The moment fucking BLEACH QUEST got gold rating, it became clear that votes were meaningless.

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>>26865611
>>26865645
>>26865679
>>26865726

>>26865726
Pretty sure the number of wolf spiders that would fit in a vagina would be significantly lower. Maybe in the high teens if you really packed them in there.

Hell of a lot more deadly though, I guess.

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>>26865628
>>26865650
Combined. Made sense.

>>26865946
"I like popcorn too, I wonder if they'd go good with caramel"

Next course of action, the Jester. I say, we dig out the tunnel, hell, hole the hole mountain. Send word for engineers and professional dungeon explorers, to dig out any trap mechanisms.

>>26865946
Right then. I don't think we're good enough to take on the Jester yet. Take Katya, the immortal and some skeletons and see what is with these snakes.

>>26865946
Lamia time

>>26865946
Which one is Daya? And what happened to Palla?

Rolled 16

>>26865946
Attempt highly dangerous diplomatic manuveur

>>26866051
Daya is the minotaur leader of the tribe and your life mate.

Palla rejoined her tribe once the centaurs were released from the alliance harem.

>>26866002
Fuck. We should not mess with that fucking clown. You remember what happened last time.

>roll1d1000
>1

>>26866076
We're not messing with him.
Our army and engineer's are.

We'll dig the fucker out.

>>26866090
>implying he is there

>>26866099
Even if he's not, might be some treasure in there. At least we can boast that we've triumphed over the Jester and he ran away in shame.

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>>26866002

>>26866230
Fuck the rules.
Buy catapaults.
Start a siege

>>26866247
This. Tear to the ground. We're not going in there with 500 men, let alone 5.

>>26866230
Fuck the rules
Build skeleton catapults
Start a siege

>>26866247
I like your style.

Well there goes Elyria, she had a good run I guess.

>>26866230
It sounds like we will get brainwashed into waifuing yet another chick if we succeed. We don't need that shit. Go find some snakes instead.

>>26866247
>only catapults

We should initiate operation: fuck you
Poison the groundwater, use catapults to throw rotting cadavers over the walls (which we then control) and let the skeletons handle all the siege equipment. We work 24/7 and since we don't have to worry about supply lines with undead we ARE going to starve that fucker out.

>>26866313
It's of no difference.
As much as I'm, and I'm sure the actual Mr. Bones, is against the idea of loli's, our true heir should be of the immortal.

>>26866335
>Implying an immortal needs food
>Nor has a stockpile worth centuries