>>25831757

The rest of the day had been...an eye-opener, so to speak, on what an idol of Kirishima Ruri's popularity and personality gets to on a typical day. Well, not so typical, she'd reminded you - today was to be spent generating hype for the concert tomorrow. Teasing the hordes of fans by appearances and interviews and photoshoots, to whet their appetites for the real thing.

The poolside swimsuit photoshoot was...it was certainly a part of that, you can't find a way to describe it better. You and Sayaka accompanied Ruri to the Mitakihara Community Center Pool, the entire facility seemingly having been reserved for just this shoot.

You discovered this because of the horde of fans crowding around the entrance, all of them eager to see their idol in skimpy swimwear - as well as the bawling children being comforted by their parents, grasping colorful inner tubes and water wings that would unfortunately not see use that day. You'd have pointed it out to Ruri, but you were busy elbowing a fan that got too close for comfort in the face to do so. This, of all things, got you cheers and applause and quite a bit of squealing from the crowd. Sayaka had to bodily drag you to get you walking again, you were that stunned.

The trip to the pool was also interesting. Kyosuke drove the three of you there, driving the ugliest, blockiest car you've ever seen, a huge metal block on huge metal wheels that made an ugly roar with its gas-guzzling engine. You were told that this was a an armored Hummer, built to ferry VIPs around.

...You'd have preferred Kharn's Marauder. Sure, it had skulls on the bumper and hubcaps, but it had a bit more finesse than this. It had a bit more style. But you kept your complaints to yourself - at least the route taken was secure enough, and you were also escorted by two similar vehicles, manned by half of Kyosuke's goon squad.

[1/2]

>>25831768

In any case, the trip was a quiet one. Sayaka didn't seem in the mood to talk, glaring at the rear view mirror from time to time, or checking her phone. Ruri seemed to be busy giggling and chatting quietly with someone on her phone, too, leaving you to blow cigarette smoke out the lowered window. Deepthroat had kept the camera trained on all three of you the entire time, so even if Sayaka was up to talking business, you couldn't really talk about work.

The photo shoot itself was an ordeal. Ruri had tried to get you and Sayaka into swimsuits too, which the both of you vehemently refused. You very nearly pulled a gun on her, until Sayaka took one for you by relenting. She was scowling at you and Ruri as she did it, but you have the nasty suspicion that she was actually enjoying it, from trying out several expensive-looking swimsuits to being in the shots that Ruri took.

It's here that you also saw just how...well, well-toned Sayaka is. She's even got abs, for fuck's sake, something you never really noticed, even if half her midriff is bared in her Magical Girl costume. She did have a few scars that need covering up by makeup, but other than that, even Ruri was impressed. You very nearly choked on cigarette smoke as the idol spent quite a few minutes rubbing and petting Sayaka's abdominals, making the latter blush and fidget awkwardly.

After the photoshoot was the radio interviews, and those went by pretty quick. Just some wisecrack DJs trying to flirt with Ruri, and the superidol shilling the concert. You didn't need to participate then, just stand outside the recording booth while Kyosuke and his goons covered every entrance to the small broadcasting building. Uneventful, for the most part.

[2/3]

>>25831773

You're now at Mitakihara Stadium, having arrived here half an hour ago. This time, there are no crowds to speak of - only, well, the horde of idols that Ruri's entrance seems to have interrupted in mid-rehearsal. All of them met the super idol with a smile, a cheerful greeting and a bow - but even you could detect the underlying tension in the air. You're not just sure if it's aimed at your client or you, having caught a few of the idols staring daggers at you once or twice. One of the idols in question you recognized as Miki Hoshii, the blonde who got on your case while you were trying to clear the air with Iori.

The stage the idols are performing on seem to be built right at the center of the stadium itself, its construction only very recently finished. It looks stable enough, the rigging and scaffolding for the lights and fireworks looking solid even by your inexperienced eye. More construction is ongoing even as the idols are practicing on the stage itself. Despite it being a rather pleasant day, the stadium's ordinarily open ceiling was shuttered, most probably to shield the idols from the heat.

...Speaking of which, Iori is also here, looking quite energetic despite the intense dance routines you've seen them practicing. She didn't exactly call you out and greeted you herself, but she did brighten up and waved at you as they took a brief water break. Takane also acknowledged your presence with a small, discreet smile and a nod. Chihaya, the other idol you recognize, merely stared at you in silence, before averting her eyes as if to ignore the fact that you exist.

[4/5]

>>25831782

That's...fine, really. You've had enough unwanted attention for the day, and you'd like to do something that has to do with work more than simply playing up for the camera. Thankfully, Ruri's dragged Sayaka off to the changing room to get into costume - it seems that the super idol was impressed enough with the photoshoot that Sayaka was definitely going to be included in the number. You could only hope that the Eversor provides enough of a distraction that you're saved a second time from such a fate.

Lucky, too, that Deepthroat's gone with them - or at least, that's what you last saw of the sweaty, awkward assistant. It's disturbing, sometimes, how you don't even notice she's around until you hear her stutter, or catch a whiff of sweat-dried hair.

With the rest of his goons patrolling the stadium, Kyosuke is the only other non-idol there with you. He's looking distinctly uncomfortable himself, moreso when Sayaka's around. He's standing a respectable distance away from you, while you lounge around in one of the front seats nearest to the stage. You've also caught him sneaking glances at you, as if debating whether or not to talk to you but cancelling at the last second. At least, that's what you think. You have no idea otherwise why he'd be doing that.

You lean back, letting out a sigh as you rest your feet from your heels. You wanted to smoke here, but apparently it's prohibited- some of the idols being allergic to cigarette smoke or something like that. You'd have argued that the pyrotechnics they'd be setting off during the concert would be much worse than your cigarettes, but you didn't push the point. This has been the longest day, and you're not looking for an argument. Not right now, anyway.

[5/6]

>>25831791

You take another glance around, and catch Kyosuke looking at you again. You give him one of your glares - and he quickly pales at that, turning away and looking quite sheepish. Fiddling with what appears to be a spare headset in his hands, similar to the one he's wearing now.

You shake your head and watch the idols start up their routine again. Ruri and sayaka are also there - wearing the same, flowery white gown that you'd seen Iori and the idols wearing when you met her in the coffee shop. It looks uncomfortably warm, but you have to admit Sayaka's pulling it off. She's got enough chest for it, at least, something you clearly lack. ...Not that you ever compared or anything.

Any way. You have some free time now.

What do you do?

>>25831796
[X] Talk to Sayaka.

>>25831796
Do we have a headset? if not
"oi, throw that 'ere, if youre gonna use em, share em"

>>25831796
Go over to Kyouske and ask what the fucking deal is. Why does he keep staring at you like that?

>>25831812
>>25831811
[x] Both of these

>>25831796
[x] Take the damn headset from Kyosuke, since he obviously doesn't have the balls to hand it over himself. Ensure that our reinforcements are present and competent. Inform them that if they spot someone with a gaudy Golden object, they are to report it to us immediately.
We'll have to set it up so that all jewellery is confiscated at the entrance.

>>25831826
[x] Same. See if we can get in on the security headsets too.

After 110 threads of archiving, i've finally caught up, and gotten on a thread when it started.

>>25831796
>What do you do?
>[x] Text Midori mildly annoyed message since in the long run this whole Murder Mayumi thing is her fault. And that you hope she's doing fine after recovery.
>[x] Check if QB got any update on the infor we requested.
>[x] Go have chat with Kyosuke. (But don't pull "kneepcaps" card again just yet).

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>>25831773
>Dat tomboy Sayaka build

>>25831796
[X] Ask what's wrong with the goon squad leader.

>>25831796
[x] Talk to Kyosuke and grab the extra headset, ask why he's so cagey around us and Sayaka

Well, it's obvious why he's cagey around us

>>25831796

Talk to Kyosuke. See what it is about him that's upsetting Sallaka.

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>>25831796
>>Chiaki worried about being flat.

It's okay, Murderface. It's a status symbol.

[X] Go annoy Kyousuke. Find out what his deal is with all the staring

>>25831796

[X] Why do you keep looking at me?

>>25831796
>>25831826
[x] Let's go with this.

>>25831796
Did we already get our headset or does he have the one we were supposed to get? Now's a good time to nab it, but in either case beckon him over here. "Is there something on my face, or what? The geek with the camera staring at me awkwardly is bad enough, do I have to take it from you too?"

>>25831896
She just looks so... *pleased*

>>25831796
[x] Call Midori
[x] Tell her that she is in for one hell of a ride once we come back for the whole MMxMM-Thing and how it got out ot control

Teasing Midori has never failed to put us into a better mood.

I've been lurking and reading archives on 4chan for months... and you know what? I still don't think I'm ready for this.

>>25831796

>[x]Talk to Kyosuke.
We better get any awkwardness out of the way with at the start rather then let it build where it blows up in our face later.

We should ask Ruri to pack up the swimsuit that Sayaka liked the best for us. Gift for Kyoubro.

>>25831917
>name
>email
>offtopic posts
No, you clearly are not.

>>25831905
that's borderline yandere expression if you ask me

>>25831923
YES
SOMEONE WRITE THIS DOWN
Hopefully a drawfag will pick it up, do want girl abs.

>My face when Midori gets the word about her anime getting publicized this way, checks out the footage herself on her smartphone, and then pees a little in horror when she sees us there.
>Then turns off her phone for the rest of the mission.

>>25831896
I like to think these are all drawn by Midori as she's fantasizing. If she can't have the real deal (yet) her self-insert damn well will!

>>25831930
Green Green may be borderline yandere in the first place, on some level.

why are you guys doing swimsuits, have you jerks saved madoka yet? no I dont follow this quest with any regularity

>>25831796
Take all the photos we can of Sayaka

Also maybe we should try and get Mami an autographed picture or something as a souvenir. While she doesn't seem a huge fan of Ruri she does like MMxMM and Ruri is voicing Midori

Maybe an autographed copy of her script or something

Anyway while we are waiting here in between bothering Sayaka with our phone and finding out if they have any cameras recording this so we can nab a copy for Kyouko ask Kyousuke what his deal is and why our Blue friend seems to want to tear his arms off and slap him with them

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>>25831965
>He doesn`t know about the obligatory Beach/Hotspring-Episodes

>>25831965
Long story short: Madoka doesn't want to be saved, at least until she torments us by making us hunt down her toys, and we're hired for Idol security detail in the interim. On the plus side, this time around we probably won't almost get our client raped. On the negative side, our client may be secretly evil and we may be ambushed by a golden weapon user(which may in fact be our client.)

>>25831934
woah hold on there we don't want this to turn into BFQ

no seriously
DO IT

>>25831947

keep in mind that her original Meeting was in fact Midori "Rape 'em All" Hanegawa

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Ok, thinking about it from last thread. The presence of Kyosuke has added a further complication to this mission.

Unless Deculture has changed Kyosuke so that he was a sporty guy instead of a musician. Then Sayaka's wish has essentially failed, since she wished the use of his hand back so he can play violin again and Sayaka can have gratitude sex not be a security guy.

Anyway, the point is that we should keep an eye on Sayaka and Kyosuke because if we fuck up too badly then the curse of the von Seckendorffs might be realised.

and Kyoko will hate us forever

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What if she has a Golden Weapon?

>>25831995
Swimsuits are a fetish now?

Man, I need to spend some more time on /d/.

>>25832007
That is slightly wrong, she did tell the otaku to not touch Chiaki and she was going to take us out cleanly as a show of respect

Then I expect she was going to hang onto our corpse and soul gem and masturbate with them for the rest of her life because she was so obsessed with Chiaki

>>25832028
Don't
It is still just dicks all the way down

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>>25832023

AHHHHHHH!

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Did somebody say 'Swimsuits'?

>>25832023
What if I have a golden dick?

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>>25832022
C'mon, Anon, what's the worst thing that could happenn?

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Office hours about to start.

Found MGNQ precisely one year ago. Decided to redraw my first piece of fanart to commemorate.

Have fun guys. Don't let anyone get killed!

[X] Call Kyouko. Then go talk to Kyosuke.

>>25832057
Nice!

>>25832007
>My face when my nickname catches on

>>25832076
Next thing you know Decu will make it canon!

>>25832076
Man, tell me about it. I called her Emi once and it stuck for following 20 episodes.

>>25832103
To be fair it took that long to get her new legs.

does anyone have the compilation image (animated gif) of all the OP's?

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>>25832136
Sure.

>>25832103
To this day I'll never know if it was mostly a huge joke where people called Iori Lori, or if a lot of people were honestly confused on the matter.

>>25832057
Missed the voting, damn it.

Any chance of Chiaki going "Gokigenyou, Motherfuckers" coming up soon?

>>25832214
He never did do a real Midori intro image. Maybe after Mami and Kharn he was sick of drawing boobs.

>>25832222
We are not in a maid costume. No.

>>25832083
>>25832103
I called Madoka Pinky in the first thread and it stuck for the next 100 odd

>>25832214

>The hat
Man.

>>25832232
Referring to the possibility of having a drawing of it, should've clarified.

>>25832235
She ain't Madoka anymore, that's for sure.

>>25832220
It's an ongoing joke in the iM@S community.

>>25831811 >>25831812 >>25831826 >>25831869

It's with an irritated grunt that you turn back towards the awkward young man and wave him towards you. He blinks at this, puzzled as he looks around, before pointing at himself, as if to ask if he was he one you were motioning to. ...Of course, who else would it be, for fuck's sake? You two are the only ones in the audience seats.

You wave him over again, and he finally gets the hint, quickly standing up from his own seat and making his way towards your row. He stands in front of you, saluting nervously yet again, like a soldier waiting to be ordered around by a superior officer. You'd have laughed at this if it weren't for the idols up on stage already giggling at him. You instead shake your head and gesture for him to take a seat, which he does - a couple of seats to your left, anyway. A respectful distance.

Somehow, you find that a relief and yet an annoyance at the same time.

"Yes, er, ma'am? Anything I could help you with?" Kyosuke asks after a few moments of painfully-awkward silence.

Well. Maybe something you could help him with, seeing as you've been catching him eyeballing you earlier. Is there something on your face, or what?

"Ahah. No, ma'am, there wasn't anything on your face. S-sorry about that, though." A nervous laugh issues from him as he shakes his head. "I was just...well, I wanted to give you the headset you were asking for, back at the hotel. All of ours are rather used, and we didn't feel that it'd be right to give a proper lady such as yourself something we've been using. So we had a new one sent over from headquarters, and...uh, here." He holds out the headset to you, reaching over the empty seat to do so. It's a sleek thing, one that clips to your ear with a thin stalk that curves outward slightly for the mic. "Set to our frequency and synchronized with our own network."

[1/2]

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>>25832312

You take it from him, surprised. It's...the first time you've been considered a 'proper lady', and probably the first time anyone's taken such a thing into serious consideration. Or maybe you haven't really been around guys all that often - at least, the sort you don't gun down at first sight. You don't quite know how to respond to that, so you try to ignore it for now, clipping the headset on but not switching it on at the moment.

You do however take note of the young man's speech - how he seems to adopt a more...reserved-sounding vocabulary, at least when he's away from his comrades. In their company, you've caught him resorting to a rougher sort of language, the kind that's peppered with a lot more 'bros' and 'man' and half-hearted profanity.

He didn't answer your question, though. What's with the staring?

"Well...um, please don't take this the wrong way, ma'am, but I couldn't help it. This is the first time I've worked a high-profile security job like this. It's usually bank and prison runs for me when I'm on active duty." He manages to work up a smile despite the fact that he seems to be sweating under your gaze. "It's...well, this is the first time I've seen a Magical Girl in the flesh, ma'am. Everyone in the agency's sworn up and down that girls like you exist, but I've always been skeptical. I thought they were just...jerking the new guy around, something like that. Turns out they weren't, and..." It's then that he laughs nervously, again. "...Sorry, ma'am. I'm sure you're finding this stupid."

Huh. That's...well. You've no idea how to take this, especially from someone who you've threatened to blow their kneecaps off earlier.

How do you respond?

>>25832312
>proper lady
Boy needs to get his eyes checked.

>>25832312
[X] Scratch headset; realise under the paint it's gold coloured; pull off Kamjou's face to reveal him to be Jyuubey; solve mystery forever

>>25832332
[x] THIS >>25832339
oh god this is perfect
Then tell him to fuck off and do his job.

>>25832332
So, someone is actually in awe of us?

Let's celebrate being officially awful by getting a drink, and giving Kyosuke one too. Just a small one - we are on duty, after all.

>>25832332
Huh, well that was boring. I...don't really have anything to say to him.
[x] Whatever, you've met dumber.

>>25832349
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xRmgfJuj-eA

>>25832007
>>25832030

She fell in with the wrong people and was probably coping by slowly becoming one of those bad people.

But luckily she had a wake-up call in the form of both of her legs being shot out, and having a week or so in a antimagic refrigerator to re-assess her life choices.

>>25832332
>How do you respond?
"You sound way too sophisticated for this job. How did you get into this? Did you just wake up one morning thinking you'd be bodyguard or has that been your dream since childhood?"

Don't reveal that blueberry noticed him just yet. Maybe he honestly doesn't know and there is no need to tell him.

>>25832332
"We're real and we're as good as they say."

"We're also professionals, and speaking as one professional to the other, while I appreciate the thought, the security of the principal outweighs my comfort."

"Anything out of the ordinary happened so far?"

>>25832332
[x] Sorry for not exactly being the paragon of staff swinging and star-spreading magical girls here. Ah, whatever. I'll buy you a shot of whiskey if you tell me why Blueberry had such a reaction to you..and how to duplicate it.

>>25832332

Tell him you hope it won't be necessary to show him what a Magical Girl is actually capable of.
Then try a nicer approach. Up until now he delivered a quality service, after all. Say as much.
Maybe ask him about Sayaka.

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>>25832332
"Well we're real, and we're not freakish monsters or whatever your co-workers may have said about us. So stop staring and do your damn job."

>>25832332
[x] This >>25832376

Optionally preceded by >>25832339

>>25832332
[x]"Try not to make it the last time, kid." Test headset; make sure it's appropriately working. Order this guy somewhere discreet since he's not supposed to be standing around gawking.

>>25832332
"Oh. Huh.

Well, now you know. The most important lesson learned, between magical girls, and idols -" *Knowing glance to the stage* "-, the most dangerous things in life come in small packages."

>>25832397
I think we've found the best MGNoir art now.

>>25832332
Ask him what the deal between him and blue is
She reacted when she heard his name and then looked like she wanted to messily murder him and then he has been looking like a scolded child since

Also snap some shots of Sayaka while she is wearing Idol clothes, we need as much blackmail / Kyouko present material as this job throws at us

>>25832332
[X] Test headset while commenting: "You don't look like the type to be in this line of work."

>>25832332
[x] "Eh, a healthy bit of skepticism is okay. But Magical Girls are more dangerous than we look. If you see one, fall back and call me."

>>25832376
[x] This. Let's not clue him in too soon if he's dumb enough not to have noticed (which he may well be).

>>25832397
did u make that pic?

>>25832332
[x] Snort derisively about the "proper lady" comment.
[x] Then ask him >>25832376

>>25832443

[x] General consensus of not clueing people in to Sayaka yet. If we're lucky, nobody else other than Ruri might have made the magical girl connection yet.

>>25832563
We aren't for telling him that she is a magical girl but we want to know what the deal between the two of them is since even Noriko would have noticed that there is something serious in their past given both their reactions

>>25832581
>both their reactions
He hasn't even noticed her yet.

>>25832618
>He hasn't even noticed her yet.

How. She was in the fucking room when waltzed in.

>>25832546
We certainly drew the crude pantsu on head. The actually good part, not so much no.

>>25832634
And? He saw a person, but not Sayaka.

>>25832634
He saw Sayaka, but he didn't recognize her, it seems. Sayaka didn't even recognize him until she heard his name, so it's definitely been a while.

>>25832634
She didn't notice him either until the name was mentioned. If they were childhood friends or some such it has been a while obviously.

>>25832643
>>25832651
>>25832652
Plus it's been long enough for him to get huge; Sayaka, being a Magical Girl, probably stopped growing a while ago.

>>25832669
> long enough for him to get huge

Now we need Kyosuke`s face poorly shopped onto GIGANIGGER`s body.

>>25832669
How old is Sayaka anyway? Hell, how old are all the MGs?

>>25832376
>>25832378
>>25832384

[X] These three

>>25832756
A couple friends and I figured that in MGNQ the meguca are around eighteen, but who knows.

>>25832756
I think it's been said that most of them in this story advanced to their late teen's.

>>25832756
Chiaki is over a century old, according to Pinky.
As for the rest, I think we're 2-3 years after canon. Maybe. Decu can confirm.

>>25832756
Late teens, like 18-19. Mami's 21, Pinky/Madoka might be a little younger. Kumatora's like 16.

>>25832777
*Physically, anyway. Pinky and Murderface are a bit special.

>>25832376 >>25832378 >>25832415

You let him stew in his own silence as you test the headset, switching it on. The muted, clipped conversations of the security detail coming alive at your ear. ...You have to admit, you're impressed with their radio chatter, if it could even be called that - they're not bantering to each other uselessly, but rather keeping the conversations short and quick in their team argot. Checking in with each other from time to time as they go about their patrols.

You murmur an inquiry into the mic after a few moments, hoping to catch them off guard - Kyosuke himself flinching in surprise at this - but commendably, despite you bursting into their frequency unannounced, they give you the report you asked for in no time flat. No, no intruders or unauthorized personnel spotted at the moment. No anomalies to report either, which is good.

Satisfied, you lower the volume of the headset down until it's barely audible, before turning to Kyosuke. You've half a mind to snort at him for that proper lady comment, but there's no need to make the help more uncomfortable than they already are.

You simply tell him, then, that you'll forgive him for staring if he satisfies your curiosity. He should have his eyes checked, by the way, if he's finding you something to gawk at.

"Ah...aheh. Uh, please don't take it the wrong way, ma'am. Nothing untoward. But I'll try to answer as honestly as I can."

Fine. How'd he get into this kinda job? He sounds way too sophisticated for bodyguard duty - is he one of those secretly-rich kids looking for cheap thrills by putting themselves in danger, or something? If he is, then he'd be better off cliff-diving into a volcano, stuff like that. This kind of scene needs professionals.

[1/2]

>>25832823

"Huh? Oh, er, n-no, nothing like that, ma'am!" Kyosuke shakes his head, holding up both hands. "I...well, I did have some formal training, Miss. Violinist. Back when I was still in middle school. It didn't..." He grimaces slightly, here, as if dredging up a particularly painful memory. "It didn't exactly work out. Some stuff happened, and then some more stuff after that..." He glances up at the stage, where Sayaka seems to be receiving advice from Iori and some of the idols on a particularly difficult dance move.

"...After that I decided to, uh, find another line of work, something that didn't involve scales or stuffy recitals or teachers who'd smack your fingers with a violin bow if you'd so much as get one note wrong." He laughs lamely at this, looking back down at his right hand, which is covered in a black leather glove. His other hand, strangely enough, is bare.

"A friend got me into the agency, and I tried to see if I could get in. I managed it after two tries, and I only barely got through basic training. The rest was easy after that, and now..." Kyosuke shrugs again, before smiling at you in a sheepish way. "Er, sorry, ma'am. I'm sure you're getting bored by all this. It's really nothing exciting."

Well, it isn't, but him sneaking glances at Sayaka's got you even more curious now. Is there something between him and her? Something you're not aware of?

"A-ah. I guess...I guess you can say that, ma'am." He nods reluctantly, as if confirming it by that gesture cost him quite a bit. "Are...are you friends with Miki-san, ma'am?"

How do you respond?

>>25832827
"... for a given definition of friend yes. specifically the one where both of you are plotting to murder each other at the drop of a hat but cant because politics"

>>25832827
"Not really, no."

Leave it at that.

>>25832827
"Coworkers."

One word. Deadpan.

>>25832827
[x] She is a co-worker and a colleague. Friend may be pushing it, but we will not tolerate anyone messing with her.

>>25832827
[x] "I almost blew her head off a few weeks ago. Now she takes care of my horses."

>>25832827
bahahahahahahaha

so much for prodigy, guess sayaka's ear for classic is as bad as her decision-making skill for career path

>>25832851

[x] This

>>25832827

[X] not exactly but we share a mutual acquaintance, they're quite happy together.

>>25832855

[X] Seconding this one. If only to keep him off balance.

>>25832827
[X] "For a given measure of it, yes." Do not pry into what his right hand is. We know all too well when someone wants to hide something they find uncomfortable.

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>>25832855

>>25832827
I have met her before, she works for the same company as me in a different department

Technically true and it doesn't give anything away

>>25832827
>>25832855
[X] Let's go with this.

>>25832888
>inb4 it's a golden prosthetic hand

>>25832827
I vote [x] >>25832855

>>25832860
I'm betting he's playing his cards close to his chest and that he really didn't get his hand fixed all the way. Maybe he has a prosthetic, hence the glove.

>>25832827
>How do you respond
"We work at the same office and encounter each other fairly often. I wouldn't say we're friends though. Definitely wouldn't say that."

>>25832827

We have mutual friends, and we don't kill each other, so "yes?"

>>25832903
Just going with what Chiaki would've done. If we must ask, let's keep it quick.

>>25832855
[X] This, while adding that we're colleagues.

Sallaka is bery foolish

>>25832827
"She's kind of more like... a relative you don't get along with, but will still bail you out of jail. I'm not sure what happened between you two, but this isn't going to get in the way of your work, is it?"

>>25832827

[X] She is a co-worker and a colleague. Friend may be pushing it, but we will not tolerate anyone messing with her.

>>25832855

*facepalm* I want the chucklefucks to leave....

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>>25832903
>"Kyosuke, I am your father."
in b4 that's not the quote

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>>25832855

Well that didn`t long for a completly retarded option and people who are retarded enough to vote for it to appear.

>>25832922
Or Sayaka broke up with him and wished for something else, so his hand never got fixed in the first place.

...Where's Hitomi?

>>25832965
>MUH SRS QUEST

Threadly reminder that the updated Ebook can be found at http://pastebin.com/kbGzcbDb

>>25832827
Voting for >>25832851

>>25832945
>>25832965
>What is telling a joke?

I want the autists to leave.

>>25832851

[x] Voting for this.

>>25832966
>Sayaka broke up with him
Impossible. They were never really "together".

>>25832855
[X] This

>>25832965

On the scale of Soul gem licking to Get Fucked, this really isn't that bad. It's supposed to be a tongue in cheek joke at his expense.

Punching him in the face would have been dumber.

>>25832972
>>25832978

What does it have to do with SRS? If you plan to be autistic be autistic somwhere else #GETFUCKED #TAKECOOBIEINTOTHEBARRIER

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>>25832972
>>25832978

>>25832851
[x] This sounds neutral enough.

>>25832997
>this fucking retard thinks they are comparable instances

Point at him and laugh.

>>25832972
>>25832978
It's not that, but rather that the vote is a self-demonstrating piece on what can happen if this were a critical moment.

Just like: >>25832997

Votes like that are acceptable for times like this, but when the shit hits the fan, it should be shelved.


>>25832995
True.

>>25833014
>this retard thinks they aren't

Please kindly go jump in traffic

>>25833014
Why don`t you do everyone a favour and add a trip, so we will always know who makes the retarded ideas and can filter them?

>>25833027
#1 throw a character with little to no combat value into a melee fight that saw one of Kharn's arm torn off

#2 bring a critter that Madoka has always viewed with..distaste ino the magical barrier of a half-crazed abomination

vs

#3 a tongue-in cheek response with no consequences whatsoever

Yeah, you're an autist. Or a retard. Vanish.

>>25833027
>Cracking a joke to a friendly side character during downtime
>Comparable to actions that present an obvious danger/risk of worsening existing danger at a plot-important point of the story

Dude, what?

>all these autisms
HOW ABOUT WE MAKE THE JOKE THEN GO WITH THE SERIOUS ANSWER?
JESUS FUCK.

Jesus, why can't we have a thread without people being massive homosexuals about choices and votes?
Cast a vote and shut the fuck up.

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>>25832988
To a Nice Girl like Sayaka, that counts as a relationship.

>>25832855
>>25832851

Both of these.

Lead with "almost blew her head off" then follow with the respect.

>>25833053
>Bu-but muh shitposting autistic arguments that everyone hates! It's not a MGNQ thread without them!

>>25833044

Seconded

>>25832945
>*facepalm*

And you're calling other people chucklefucks?

>>25833020
But this isn't a critical moment. You can't be afraid of all attempts at levity just because Decu miscounted once. That's boring.

>>25833104
That's the tricky part, it seems. Getfucked and BringCoobiealong really rustled people's jimmies.

Wasn't there for the first one and I can't remember what I voted on for the second, sadly.

>>25833104

There was that "get fucked"...

Granted there was no way to tell that was going to lead to Midori charging ribbonhomu.

>>25833104
Because telling someone we nearly ventilated our coworkers head is really a good joke

You need to learn to pick your audience a lot better or just stop trying to be funny

>>25833122
we're murderface, we kinda have a reputation to uphold

>>25833122
>Because telling someone we nearly ventilated our coworkers head is really a good joke
We are already regarded as an avatar of death and destruction.

>>25833104
Yeah, man! You are correct! Telling someone that we nearly killed our coworker is a great joke!

And you know what? I raped my niece! Isn`t it funny?

>>25833145
Nyet, we're not simply Murderface anymore.

>>25833122
>>25833147
>>25833148
To put it in another way, Kyousuke isn't the type to appreciate gallows humor.

>>25833148
Are you underage? You sound really young and not a slightly irrational.

>>25832943
Seconding this.

>>25833148
>implying blowing her head off would even slow Sayaka down
HER POWER IS SUPER-REGENERATION.
IF IT DOESN'T BREAK HER SOULGEM YOU MAY AS WELL NOT BOTHER.

>>25833148
Did she make those delightful screams little children in pain do?

Very.Remove the stick from your ass.

>>25833104

I can respect the fears of some people. What with /tg/ always trying to get the best ending and there are those -50 X person points thing that happens from things like this.

But the amount of bitching that has started to take place is getting out of hand. We used to have real discussions between posts, now people are at each others throats more and more. With half always bitching at the other because they think a suggestion is stupid. It needs to end.

>>25833148
It's less of a joke and more stating a fact. We nearly did ventilate her more than once.

You sound like a total tool, though.

>>25833186
They are autistic. They literally cannot stop themselves.

>>25833148
Hilarious.

>>25833148
>>25833122
Wait, it's the "we almost shot her in the head" part people have a problem with? I assumed it was the horse part.. I didn't get it, so I assumed it was a dumb meme or injoke or something.

Our Chiaki has a really morbid sense of humor, and saying we nearly ventilated a co-worker is pretty tame in our eyes. It's not like we're tiptoeing around a little kid, anyway, Kyou's a bodyguard and it's not like Chiaki censors herself a lot anyway.

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>>25833163
I don`t know, are you retarded?
How exactly is it rational telling someone that you tried to blow your collegue`s head off? So.. are you? Retarded, I mean?

>>25833171
Is this you?

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ITT: pic related

It's like I'm on /a/....

>>25833200
Actually since we came back from Siberia we have quite a bit

All part of the "not wanting to be a miserable murder hobo who smells of whiskey and blood" deal we are trying for

>>25833200
>the horse part
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Equerry

>>25833203
It's a joke because it really happened, but he doesn't know it so he'll probably assume we're joking, and that will be extra funny to us. She lived, anyway. Come on, black humor is a noir staple.

>>25833159

That's right. Murderface wouldn't have acknowledged him at all. She would have punched him in the gut for letting the Yakuza in before he got to explain anything, took his headset, and relieved him of duty. We are acting like what we think a Warmaster Chiaki "Murderface" Matsuda would act.

I'm not about to change the way Murderface acts around people because she might think it would hurt someones feelings. It they get upset, well that's her. She doesn't know Kyousuke enough to act one way or the other around him.

>>25833216
Huh, the sheer incongruity of it actually does make it kind of amusing.

>>25833186
I half expect the -50 Character Points posts are to mess with us, like the redux of meeting Pinky in the barrier after Coobiegate.

It would've been better if Decu didn't tell us we could have saved Mirai until the end or something, I think.

>>25833216
Now I get it. And yeah, it would be kind of funny.

>>25833237
>It would've been better if Decu didn't tell us we could have saved Mirai until the end or something, I think.

If anything, that would've made these fuckers even more paranoid.

>>25833193
>this post

Just more passive aggressive bitching. I'm not going to agree with you. An autist is calling someone else autistic.

/tg/ has become /a/ 2.0....

>>25833271
Well, it is mostly an /a/ quest.

>>25833271
/tg/ always has been [insert board here] 2.0

>>25833214
There's a difference between "Not wanting to wake up in our own stink with whisky amnesia and zero friends while shooting neutral people in the kneecaps all the time while snorting crushed vicodin" and "Going all PG-rated with our dialog and sense of humor".

>>25833271
/tg/ is every board 2.0.

It's like you don't even need other boards

>>25833271
>Stop having fun on my board!
Pathetic.

>>25833293

This, seriously. Murderface HAS toned down quite a bit. But they don't realize that no matter what we do, we will fuck up at some point and shit will hit the fan.

NYAN NYAN

NYAN NYAN

>>25833332
NYAN NYAN

NIHAO NYAN

>>25833345
GORGEOUS

>>25833344
good job mate

>>25833344

ONE. JOB.

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>>25833344

>>25833332
>>25833339
>>25833344
>>25833354

So how does this decu summoning thing go? I kind of get it, after reading the last few threads; it's
"Nyan nyan" X 2-5 times
"Nihao Nyan" 2-3 times
"YOU HAD ONE JOB" or variations on the phrase
Then a bunch of stuff and then Decu turns up, right?

That's how it goes?

FUCK YOU ALL WE CAN MAKE THIS WORK
>>25833351
DELICIOUS

>>25833344
It doesn't even work...

I don't even know what's more pathetic.

The fact you can't do It or the fact you're still trying

>>25833324
As much as possible, I'd like not to fuck up, thanks.

>>25833376
I'm waiting until they finally give and go straight for animal sacrifices.

>>25833376
>That's how it goes?

You nailed it.

>>25833377
DECULTURE

>>25833387
The latter.

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>>25833376
gr8 b8 m8

>>25833376
Well, it's supposed to be
NYAN NYAN
NYAN NYAN
NIHAO NYAN
GORGEOUS
DELICIOUS
DECULTURE

but /tg/ made MAG our dump stat

>>25833388
The more you try not to fuck up, the more likely it is you do.

>>25833376

It would work if everyone just let one person do it. Instead of thinking, "I can post the next phrase and speed it up." No, you cannot, it will just fuck the whole thing up.

>>25833415
We didn't even buy any of the awakening qualities.

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>>25833415
>>25833376

>>25833415
Alongside INT, for that matter.

>>25833430
Unless you've thought about it first, which is hard to do considering we're doing this on an anonymous image board.

>>25833460

Nice, I was looking for that image but guess I missed that one when transferring files to my new computer. Thanks anon.

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>>25833430

>>25833388

It's fine to try not to fuck up. It's not fine for so many people to start bitching and bring up past fuck ups when they think a post will cause a fuck up. Like that's going to help.

>>25832855 >>25832851

Friends? Well. That's one way of looking at it. You've never really been friends with the blue-haired Eversor - more like barely-tolerable acquaintances on both your parts. Still, you haven't tried to kill each other lately, so...you decide to be honest about that, at least.

A small smile quirks the corner of your lips as you tell Kyosuke, offhandedly, about how you very nearly put a bullet in Sayaka's brain a few months ago. Now, she takes care of your horses.

The young man blinks at you, his face going pale. "E-er. Aheh. That's...that's a joke, isn't it, ma'am? I...I don't get it myself, but..."

You look at him, before taking a cigarette from your inventory and sticking it between your lips, unlit. It's only after a few moments of you stretching out the silence between the both of you to an uncomfortable, painful thinness that you reply.

Yeah, just a joke. You're not into horses. But if he's asking that if you're associated with Sayaka in any way, yes. She's a co-worker and a colleague. Friends...that'd be pushing it, but you won't just stand by if you see her getting harassed by anyone.

"Ah. I...I see." Kyosuke smiles a rather helpless smile, the smile a father makes when you've just told him that his daughter will never be a ballerina, due to someone having blown her knees off while you wave the smoking gun in her face. "Well, that's...that's sort of like a friend, I suppose, ma'am. I'm glad she has very good friends." The young man nods, more to himself than to you, as if to affirm something. "I've...I've always suspected something was up, but..."

But...? If he's going to say something, he should finish it, you know. You hate being kept in the dark.

[1/2]

NYAN NYAN

>>25833497

"It's nothing, ma'am. If it's alright, I'd like to keep it to myself. Personal. I hope you understand." The young man shakes his head, letting out a sigh.

...Of course, but you have to know if this is going to affect the op in any way. The last thing you need is people taking things too personally and not having enough room to act professionally.

"It won't, ma'am. I promise you that."

Good. Just so the both of you are clear, then. If he's got shit to settle with Sayaka, then they should do so only when the principal's secure in her suite, never here where things could go wrong.

"I understand perfectly. Crystal clear, ma'am."

Despite his response, Kyosuke sounds absolutely wretched, and you can't help but feel just the tiniest bit bad for him, if this is at all how you think it is. Telling him about Kyoko would probably twist the knife in even further, and you heard from Midori about how some guys are into that.

Some perverts in this town.

"Well. Um. It's been good talking to you, ma'am. I'll...go on ahead and join my team on patrol." He stands up from his seat, and taps at his headset. "If you need backup or support, ma'am, just shout for us and we'll be here in ten seconds flat, maybe less. We'll contact you directly in case we find anything."

[2/3]

>>25833500

You nod at this. Sounds reasonable.

Kyosuke gives you another salute, before straightening his suit and walking off, murmuring into his mic as he does so. Now leaving you well alone with Sayaka and the idols. ...Truth be told, Sayaka's actually getting along fairly well with them, even when she seemed to be completely disillusioned about them earlier. She's even giggling, now, as Ruri practices some steps with her with an exagerrated flair, their hands on each other's waists.

What do you do now? Seems they'll be taking a break soon. To the side of the stage, Deepthroat's sitting by herself, on the floor, sniffing as she despondently nibbles on a sandwich. A half-empty water bottle on her lap. The camera has also been turned off for now.

What do you do?

[]Call Kyoko for a report.
[]Call Deepthroat over.
[]Wait for the break, and then try to talk to Iori.

>>25833513

>[x]Call Deepthroat over.

>>25833513
[X]Call Kyoko for a report.

>>25833513
>[x]Call Deepthroat over.

It's time for spaghetti.

>>25833485
I'm throwing money at my screen and nothing's happening.

>>25833513
Can we have more than one choice per poster?

>>25833513
[x] Deepthroat

>>25833513
[x]Walk over to Noriko.

"You alright?"

>>25833513
[x]Call Kyoko for a report.
Let's see if Midorin can out-spaghetti Spaghetti-tan.

>>25833513
[x]Call Deepthroat over.

Ey, kiddo, wanna be awkward together?

>>25833513
>[X]Call Deepthroat over.

Girl needs a friend

>>25833513

>[X]Call Kyoko for a report.

>>25833513
TAKE PICTURES

Seriously not enough blackmail material yet

Then call Kyouko or something

>>25833513
>[x]Call Deepthroat over.
followed by
>[x]Wait for the break, and then try to talk to Iori.

>>25833545
Generally Decu will work multiple posts in if they work together. Here, they won't really.

>>25833513
[x]Get deepthroated.

>>25833513
>[]Call Deepthroat over.
Let's see if we can get a spaghetti singularity going.
No, don't actually try to make one, just talk to her.

>>25833513
>[X]Call Kyoko for a report.

>>25833513

[X] Call Kyoko for a report.

Business first; see how things are going with Red and Green. After that...

[X]Call Deepthroat over.

>>25833576
Thanks, make my one vote count then.

>>25833513
[X]Call Kyoko for a report.

>>25833513

Its too early for Kyoko to have come up with anything.

>[x]Call Deepthroat over.

We might as well know everyone.

>>25833513
[x] Call Noriko over
She needs to wash her hair at least.

>>25833513

[x] Check the phone app.

>>25833589
This is te first day of te kidnapping case, and Kyoko already said it would probably take 3 days.
It's too soon to expect results and it'll seem like we're micro-managing if we call.

>>25833513
>[x]Call Deepthroat over.

Kyouko would let us know on her own initiative if something was up and about. No need to pester her.

>>25833513
[x]Call Deepthroat over.
It's not often Chiaki gets to be the social butterfly.

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>>25833513
[X] Call Deepthroat over, then talk to Iori after the break

>>25833638
But the other idols are going to eyeball us then someone will say something rude and the whole atmosphere will go to shit and we're not even halfway into the event

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>>25833500

>Despite his response, Kyosuke sounds absolutely wretched, and you can't help but feel just the tiniest bit bad for him, if this is at all how you think it is. Telling him about Kyoko would probably twist the knife in even further, and you heard from Midori about how some guys are into that.

heh.

For some reason I can imagine Kyosuke getting approached by Nico/meduka!Bakura/meduka!Marik/or whoever made those cards and get told "Hey, I got this card that can make Sayaka realise her feelings for you she got buried deep down inside. She doesn't look like it but she has enough money for you to quit your job and go back to playing the violin AND you will be able to pay her back for sacrificing her humanity to fix your hand. All you need to do is help me kidnap Ruri"

>>25833638

If you cut ties, you need to leave them cut. It wasn't as clean as it could have been, but it's done.

>>25833659
Not if we get her somewhere private. Text her or something.

>>25833677
...God dammit, rebooting the shadowrun array now

>>25833685
ESPECIALLY If we're to get her somewhere private. Once some bitch idol sees us with Iori in private she's going to throw a shitfit and It will end in even worse Chiaki-Idols relationship.

And It will also ruin Sayaka's day

>>25833685

And talk about what exactly?

>>25833677
...Kyousuke's the compromised agent.

Blueberry's gonna hate us again.

>>25833716
>again

How long until the shooting starts again? We haven't had nearly enough flesh of fallen angels lately.

>>25833677
>>25833694
You're only thinking of that now? I've been suggesting he's a plant from all the way up at >>25832349

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>>25833677

>>25833711
No one, someone, anyone. Just check in on the girl, shoot the shit.

Fuck the bitch idols, Iori's one of the only friends we have.

>>25833726

Decu said it's possible this mission could be a bloodless one. So probably not till we get to the oil rig in 4 days.

>>25833732
Do it in a way that's less retarded next time.

hue

>>25833726
You'll look at this oasis of peace with nostalgia once it's back to inter-officio warfare and our skin being on the line every post.

>>25833742
Possible =/= likely.

We're pretty much guaranteed to screw something up here soon enough.

>>25833742
Bloodless version is the one in which we throw both the mole and the villain into concrete pool

>>25833742
That's IF we do things right, instead of messing up and making Mami disappointed in us again.

>>25833740

It's too soon for us to shoot the shit with her. It's going to bring up unwanted shit that we don't need right now. Shit Iori doesn't need right now.

It's been what, 2-3 days since we shot her down? Way too soon. Lets get though this assignment unhindered, kill some people on an oil rig. Then maybe we can do something about mending things with Iori.

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>>25833758
>disappointing Mami

Now why would you suggest we go and do something like that?

I've had a thought. Since we're warmaster now, can we get in contact with the other warmasters? Just be as blunt as possible and just ask if they have any golden weapons? Yes I know, probably not the smartest idea.

Or we can have a few meet n greets, talk about the looming disaster that is Frost. I think after we finish up this Prophet bullshit we should start seeing the other Warmasters.

>>25833823
>Hello this is Warmaster. Do you have any golden weapons?
>Yes
>oh..okay...

Also
>Frost
You mean Faust?

You are now aware that these four days that we're away would be an excellent time for the Prophet to kill Mami.

>>25833845

No, obviously I mean Tobin Frost. He knows too much.

>>25833513
[x]Talk to Deepthroat, ask her why she has that fuckin name

>>25833860
Put the Shadowruns away before you hurt yourself.

>>25833823
It's not a terrible idea. First, check if we're friendly with any of the other officios, then send out a memo to them.

For those ones that are not on friendly terms with us, we can probably put out a missions for them; get someone to sort out a few fake companies, then put a bounty on golden weapons (though, we should specify not golden deagles, bangles or katanas)

>>25833513
>[x]Call Kyoko for a report.

>>25833860

I still think we should consider putting her in the golden weapons vault.

>>25833860
Fuck you
Someone get the shower curtain image up

>>25833873
Its the only thing she's good at?

>>25833880
>>25833823
>call the first warmaster from the lot
>"Uhm, yeah. So anyway do you have any gold weapons? The crazy kind? I have a shitton already, wanna duel for some?
The we fortify both the offcio and the information network and see which officios started any movements.

>>25833904
I think we should kidnap her and place her in the inventory.

>>25833860

But Mami has been warned and has Magical Girl security details looking out for her.

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>>25833677
>>25833860

[x] Stick The Cap on Mami.

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You are all now aware that Mami has golden hair.

>>25833935

But we could be with her RIGHT NOW.

>>25833909
It's the pet trick Ruri makes her do at parties.

>>25833963

All electronics also use gold in their components.

Coincidence?!?!?!

>>25833933
This, it would be the safest place.

>>25833982
Pinky is a clever girl.

>>25833985
I am sceptical.
We have a lot of explosives in there.

>>25833534 >>25833544 >>25833549 >>25833550 >>25833558

You decide to go ahead and talk to Deepthroat. You approach the stage by the side, so as not to interrupt the dance routine currently being practiced - and you sit beside the sniveling girl, as quietly as you could possibly manage. Both your legs dangling off the lip of the stage. She doesn't seem to have noticed you yet, seemingly so focused on her snack, as if trying to savor the pitiful little sandwich with every fiber of her being.

It's only after she's halfway through her sandwich - the filling seems to be a very thin spread of cheese and mayonnaise - that you tap her shoulder, carefully. Deepthroat very nearly shrieks at this, her hands reaching up to slap over her mouth as she turns to you with ringed eyes wide with fear. She shrieks again as her eyes focus on you, but this is muffled by her hands, so all it amounts to is a feeble, drawn-out whimper.

...You're not sure if you've met anyone as jumpy, as twitchy, or as nervous as her. Eveen Midori wasn't this twitchy during her first few days with you, and she knew first-hand how you were like. You wait for her to get her wits back about her, though, and she manages to compose herself enough to drop her hands to her lap.

"I...um...c-can I help you with anything, Miss Matsuda? Do...do you want something to eat? M-maybe some coffee...?" She manages to whimper this out after a few moments, her large green eyes fearful and glistening, as if just about to burst into tears.

N-no. No, you don't want anything. You just thought she'd want some company, seeing as she's by herself right now...

"M-me? You wanted to...keep me company?" Deepthroat squeaks, before shaking her head slowly. "H-heh, p-please don't make jokes, Miss Matsuda..."

You're...you're not trying to be funny. You just noticed her eating by herself, and she looked like she needed someone to talk to.

>>25833985
>stick mami in with golden weapons

Yyyyyeah you didn't think this through did you.

>>25833998

"O-oh. That's...I was having my lunch. My little brother makes it for me, and--" It's here that the girl notices that her hands are empty, and her eyes go wide as she looks around. "W-wait. My...my lunch, where it'd go--"

She looks down, down to the floor below the stage. You follow her line of sight--

Oh.

She'd dropped her sandwich in her shock at seeing you, along with her water bottle. The sandwich, having fallen apart at the impact, was further destroyed by the water bottle emptying itself on top of it, turning it into a slurry white mess.

". . ."

Silence. Utter silence.

How...how do you react, again?

>>25833949

Putting the Warmaster hat on Mami would result in her getting swarmed by the other girls in the Officio. Mami would have to butt-stroke magical girls with her muskets to prevent rape.

>>25834002
>[x] Timestop and get her a foot-long from the nearest subway

>>25834000
The Golden weapons are either in a vault or on our person, not in the inventory. She would be fine.

>>25834002
she can eat the spaghetti

>>25834002
[x] Sigh. "Sorry. Guess we're both fuckups, huh."

>>25834002
SHIT WHAT WOULD KHAR- bad idea.

[x] make a dashing escape together with Noriko before anyone gives us shit for messing up the place.
Offer snacks. And pat her on the back, I guess.

>>25834002
[X] Damn. My bad. Let's go, I'll buy you a new one.

Ask why she's so jumpy?

>>25834002
Well. That just sucks. Poor Noriko.

[x] Let's buy her a new one at a vending machine.

"Sorry. Come on. Let's get you a new one. Won't be filled with love though."

>>25834002
[x]Call Kyousuke, let him fetch new sandwich for her.

>>25834002
[x] "Sorry about that. Hey, I can't leave, so could you go out to a convenience store, and get me a bottle of ice cold water? And get something for yourself while you're there, my treat."