You are Ssen, a Lamia raised by a human Paladin who adopted you after killing the ones who birthed you. You are grown now, and Father has passed on. After a great deal of work, you have become a Paladin like your Father, and now take up his duties. You are accompanied by your best friend from childhood, the insect druid Tricia; Mage, a magic user who ran away from his family of cannibal raiders known as the Ghouls (Yes, his name is Mage. It was his idea); Persephone, a 22-year old thief/ex-guerllia fighter (She goes by Peri), and Mari, a 13-year old prodigy scholar/now sniper, who has her mind and soul trapped within Peri's body; and Lea, a deeply religious musician/martial artist, trained by her father, a famous trainer for arena fighters, she's covered from her mouth down in bandages to hide the horrific state her body has become thanks to the 'cures' that saved her from cancer.Your journey continues...Opening theme song (NEW for Season 3!): http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AMyj9SEDHZIhttp://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive.html?tags=Lamia%20Quest1d4 chan page w/battle stats: http://1d4chan.org/wiki/Quest:Lamia_Daughter_Quest
YES, been waiting for this!
>>24981108me too, anon. Me too.Now shut up, I'm listening to the theme.
Are we all still set for operation punstorm, or have we thought better of our dumb plan? We usually don't think better of our dumb plans.
Your plan to usurp Comedy/Thisleblossom's control over the Fey Court by turning Mage into Queen Mab's reincarnated husband Dagda The Good...could have gone better.The Dramatae has been dominating the court by way of fear and executions of any who oppose her. Also, she not only was excited to see all of you show up on her doorstep, but played along with the charade as well, calling Mage to be her 'Daddy.' (Something that will haunt you for years, no doubt.)She then led you to the main throne room, where you saw Mab. Trapped and terrified of her returned 'daughter,' as well as your uncle, Paladin Julian Grave, captured and tortured.But the surprises weren't done. Not by a long shot. Comedy then introduced her special guests of the evening. The reanimated bodies of Donovan, Lea's Father, Tricia's Aunt...and the lamia that was your biological mother.They all seem very pleased to see you...in a genuine 'loved one' manner, not an 'evil undead seeing next meal' manner...which is even more disturbing.
We need to see if comedy gets the leviathan joke
>>24981165I feel sort of bad about the "loved one" manner of the zombies.I hope that's an act. I really hope. Otherwise this shit is gonna get fucking brutal.
>>24981165Tell the leviathan joke. The only way to win is to out-weird comedy. Which means we probably should have brought Dana
>>24981209>>24981169Fuck the leviathan joke. We've got the huge fuck puntastic speech to give.
I'm pretty sure the general consensus was to do shock, followed by a quip, followed by a barrage of graveyard puns.
>>24981209>>24981169guys.It's not whether or not comedy gets it that's important.It's whether or not our "mom" gets it.Because if she gets it and comedy doesn't, either they ARE intelligent, or comedy is a super good actor.
Y'know, the hostage thing is really starting to get old. And zombies? Points for surprise, but really, its a joke that needs to be buried. I guess its true what they say, Comedy, your sense of humor is long dead. Whats wrong? You're silent as the grave, and your delivery is a little stiff.Seriously, what did you expect to get out of this by raising a mummy lamia instead of my father? She was Citadel-corrupt, called me a monster, and killed my sisters to save adventurers from hard moral decisions. I don't even know her name; is it Morgue-ana? She may have given birth to me, but I had only one parent, and I buried him in River's Crossing. Why isn't he here instead of someone I never even knew? No wait, don't tell me, you maggots couldn't worm your way into his mind even after death, could you?When you pull the 'loved ones from the grave' shtick, you're supposed to pick people we actually loved. They're all colossal assholes, or deeply corrupt, or both.Donovan you and Mab already know about, he shouted his sins to the world.Tricia's Aunt? Obviously hit the royal jelly judging by the red stuff dripping from her mouth, which is a big no-no. She's the sort who gives wasp witches a bad name, and no doubt she's the reason that Tricia's parents freaked out about Tricia potentially becoming an insane wasp witch. So that parental hostility toward Tricia? That's her fault. Thank you, Queen Bee-tchAnd as for Lea's dad, he was a monster who abused and dominated the ones he was supposed to protect.(continued)
>>24981226But if corpse-mom doesn't get it then we know they're just soulless husks programmed to act off of rage's notes. They probably are anyways, considering our mother named us "fourth-born, monster" and she's acting awful friendly
>>24981226true, we do.>>24981238Do you want me to pull up the punstorm? I have a modified version prepared.
You're really digging your own grave here, undertaking this scenario. The whole thing is rotten. I'm impressed you could dig up all this dirt on us, but Peace's dad already pulled that shtick far better; you don't even know about the bags. You're really beating a dead horse here. Frankly, the joke stinks. And it's starting to bug my wife. You're seriously killing her buzz here! I'm afraid that's just the final nail in the coffin. You'll have to do better to urn my respect, or to break de-composure of a Paladin."I am, of corpse, still mort-ified. It's almost tomb-uch, but necromancy has always been crypt-ic to me. Now, scythe and desist, or the pun-ishment will continue."
>>24981266I just pulled what was finished at the end of the archive. I forgot if we further refined it or not.
You stare at the face of your mother. Despite the stitched up scar, shedding hair, and the undead pallor...she's actually very pretty. A part of you does hope you'll look that good when you're her age...minus the whole rotting flesh thing."What's wrong Paladin Serpent?" Comedy says. "You've always been one for speeches...have you nothing to say to your mother?"The other Dawnchasers are just stunned into silence by the special guests.
>>24981293SAY THE LEVIATHAN JOKE
>>24981287I modified that version to be less redundant, as story's work often needs. Doesn't matter though.
>>24981293>>24981299If she doesn't get the leviathan joke, I say operation punstorm.If she does, then... shit. SHIT.
>>24981299Fuck off, we got a pun storm.
>>24981299Nooo, Pun Storm!
>>24981311>>24981320THAT'S NOT THE POINT. If she doesn't get it, she's just a zombie that's been cleverly programmed. We can't just punstorm and stab everything, we need to prove to our party that these corpses AREN'T really their loved/hated ones. Can you imagine what they'd think of us if we just spouted off a bunch of puns and stabbed our mother in the face? We need to be able to explain ourselves.
>>24981311Even if she does get it, she was Citadel Corrupted and I doubt being a servant of Comedy has helped that.
>>24981351that's what I said. Joke, and then if it fails puns.What I'm worried about... is if she gets the joke.
>>24981300>>24981351The redundancies may be a good thing. The speech would actually be a leviathan joke, and the puns are just a red herring (HAR).Assuming Echo is cool with that.
>>24981368My money says she's just a cleverly programmed zombie, on the grounds that she named us a monster when we were born
An important thing to ask or figure out:What exactly is the point of bringing these ones back? They can't expect this to really fuck with us.
>>24981378Which Leviathan joke? I'm seeing a bunch in the old thread, or are you talking about the Punstorm?
Another question:Our father said the lamias were near skeletal when he finally returned to the tower to bury them.This one isn't a skeleton.EXPLAIN, COMEDY.
>>24981440Punstorm is a levithan joke due to the reduncies of the unrefined version I posted. The puns are merely a red herring.
>>24981368why? if she gets the joke, we start asking her questions in snaketoungue to get info and piss off Comedy. plus, we can have a little mother-daughter bonding before the plan goes even more to Citadel
>>24981368What kind of difference would this really make? Remember that our mother called us a monster and tried to kill us.
>>24981462Or maybe I don't quite get leviathan humor.I don't fucking know
>>24981462>>24981440he's asking if that IS a leviathan joke. the punstorm.I, personally, say we should try with a mathematical one.
>>24981460Her skin was regenerated by the power of plot holes.
>>24981490I just said I thought it was one.
You take a deep breath and begin."Y'know, the hostage thing is really starting to get old. And zombies? Points for surprise, but really, its a joke that needs to be buried. I guess its true what they say, Comedy, your sense of humor is long dead. Whats wrong? You're silent as the grave, and your delivery is a little stiff."Seriously, what did you expect to get out of this by raising a mummy lamia instead of my father? She was Citadel-corrupt, called me a monster, and killed my sisters to save adventurers from hard moral decisions. I don't even know her name; is it Morgue-ana? She may have given birth to me, but I had only one parent, and I buried him in River's Crossing. "Why isn't he here instead of someone I never even knew? No wait, don't tell me, you maggots couldn't worm your way into his mind even after death, could you?"When you pull the 'loved ones from the grave' shtick, you're supposed to pick people we actually loved. They're all colossal assholes, or deeply corrupt, or both."Donovan, you and Mab already know about, he shouted his sins to the world."Tricia's Aunt? Obviously hit the royal jelly judging by the red stuff dripping from her mouth, which is a big no-no. She's the sort who gives wasp witches a bad name, and no doubt she's the reason that Tricia's parents freaked out about Tricia potentially becoming an insane wasp witch. So that parental hostility toward Tricia? That's her fault. Thank you, Queen Bee-tch"And as for Lea's dad, he was a monster who abused and dominated the ones he was supposed to protect.(cont)
Apologize to our teammates for our harsh tone once this is over.Because it's mostly bravado here in the hopes of getting into comedy's head. Gonna make the BIGGEST fucking grave for that lamia. Save the fuck out of julian too.
"You're really digging your own grave here, undertaking this scenario. The whole thing is rotten. I'm impressed you could dig up all this dirt on us, but Peace's dad already pulled that shtick far better; you don't even know about the bags. You're really beating a dead horse here. Frankly, the joke stinks. And it's starting to bug my wife. You're seriously killing her buzz here! I'm afraid that's just the final nail in the coffin. You'll have to do better to urn my respect, or to break de-composure of a Paladin."I am, of corpse, still mort-ified. It's almost tomb-uch, but necromancy has always been crypt-ic to me. Now, scythe and desist, or the pun-ishment will continue."Everyone turns and stares at you. A few people blink. Tricia and Mage have their jaws open in shock.Yes, this is a horrible sight, and anyone with a normal brain would be crippled with many emotions...and you do feel horrified and saddened a little...but you don't have a human brain. You have a Dragon's Pride that refuses to bow to fear, and a Leviathan's Outlook that well...lets you say things like THAT.The silence is broken by a choking noise. Mab has her eyes winced and a hand over her mouth. She's trying not to laugh.Tricia then closes her mouth and it's clear that she's biting her tongue.Lea puts her face in her hands and shakes her head.Peri/Mari and Mage both relax a little as they just look from the dead, to you, back to them, and then to you once more. They sigh and relax.Comedy's fists tighten to make her knuckles white."Puns are the lowest type of humor." She says, and you can't see, but you KNOW she's doing it through gritted teeth.
>>24981679Stop that! Much too silly!Also, I think Ssen gives a fair amount of fucks, but she is simply going to feel very terrible about that later (after stabbing comedy). A trick we got from Dana.
>>24981684>puns are the lowest form of humorI will now listen to this, as I think we've earned ithttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YGzqbEeVWhs
>>24981684"High brow humor is sooo pretentious."
>>24981684Can't you let me have my pun before I chop off your stupid masked head?
>>24981684Finish her. Use the leviathan joke we found in the book. Puns too low for you bitch? TRY A LEVEL OF HUMOR YOUR BRAIN ISNT EVEN EVEN EQUIPPED TO HANDLE
>>24981739>>24981731>>24981741In order, with "Lets see you try this instead" in between 2 and 3
>>24981684"I don't think so. It real good at heckling an unfunny comedian"
Guys. Comedy is an Aristocrats joke.
>>24981806We have to steal the punchline."And with all this, really? Who do you think you are, the Aristocrats?"
"Disregarding puns would be a GRAVE mistake. You spend too much time laughing at your own jokes to notice that you're dying out there."
>>24981815Are you trying to make them canon in universe? we already got jello. Not to mention Comedy might have started or had an hand in them given that she is an elf.
>Lowest form of humor.guys she just set us up for one last pun.
WE DID SAY THE PUN-ISHMENT WOULD CONTINUE.I DIDN'T SEE HER STOP.
>>24981831She could be doing all this as the lead-in to it. All her parties, they could just be part of the joke with the longest set-up of all time. Stealing the punchline would just piss her off to no end.
Is it just me, or has Ssen's strategy for the last two dramatae been just "explain to them exactly how stupid their plan is and then go back to stab them later"because that's exactly what we did to tragedy, and we're in the process of doing it to comedy.
>>24981741"ξn = n/T, and Δξ = (n + 1)/T − n/T = 1/T"FATALITY.
Nah this time its tear down their plan in front of their eyes. Then stab them right after.
>>24981862Nobody appreciates comedy's art.
>>24981838Fuck, I can't think of a good way to word it.
>>24981838>>24981889"I don't know, it's hard to go lower than where you went to dig up your material."
>>24981862I don't know, I've never watch the Aristocrats.>>24981864We might just be enraging her until we can just lop off her stupid berserking head. However we are beating them at their own game. Makes you wonder bout how the Fifth is contacting Ssen and her being called a monster and all that.>>24981874Care to explain to someone who sucks at math?
>>24981838"Then let it RAISE above the norm! It is not a long dead of comedy!"
>>24981862Good point, better make sure to say aristocrats before her.
>>24981932long dead form of comedy rather
>>24981912>>24981925let's modify that."I don't know, I might be low, what with slithering along the ground, but at least I don't have to go digging when I want to find some new material."better?
>>24981913It's a set of definitions that help you find the sum f of a Fourier series.It's a little above my level even.
>>24981983Not really. The first one had a cleaner delivery.
>>24982006well then, ignore my modification. I shouldn't second guess myself.
>>24981989Yeah I barely passed basic trig and college algebra
>>24981912>>24981932"I don't know, it's hard to go lower than where you went to dig up your material. In fact, why not let it RAISE above the norm? It's not a long dead form of comedy!" - and have our face look alight with the puns."But in all seriousness," -and our face droops into an intimidating glare- "You should probably rethink a few things. What has happened everywhere I go, to every enemy I face? Do you think this will end any differently? I'm not above mercy, but continuous provocation has caused a great lack of sympathy for the wicked. I say again, you should rethink a few things, it may do you good."
"I don't know, it's hard to go lower than where you went to dig up your material. Can't you let me have my pun before I chop off your stupid masked head?" You snap. "High brow humor is sooo pretentious. Let's see you try this one...it's a bit of an old one...Ei(x) = + ln(x) + (e^t - 1)/t DT = gamma + ln(x) + (n=1..inf)x^n/(n*n!)""WHAT?!" Comedy says. You mother tilts her head...and smiles."Ssen, please...enough." Tricia says. "The room's just dead.""No sense in trying to exhume old Leviathan humor." Mage says."That joke really is the type that makes the audience go searching for brains." Lea says."Eh." Peri says, waving her hand at Lea."Cut me some slack, I'm not good at this." She snaps."Well, Comedy must be, she's already killed most of her audience by what we've heard." Mari says.You hear a faint chuckle from Julian."ENOUGH!" Comedy snaps. "Fine." She points at Mage. "Tonight we begin the trials...but first...we need to have a nice meal...all of us. Together." She claps her hands and a squad of Fey COurt come in."Ready the banquet table, and escort the Queen there...oh and make sure that our guests are seated next to their loved ones...this is a treasured reunion after all." She points at Julian. "Get that one ready too, if he or they make any trouble. Kill them."Comedy storms off.A Fey Court soldier is at your elbow. "This way, please."
>>24982032Well this is gonna be awkward, stuck between your undead mother and your uncle who wrote a book that helped the further the science of killing your species.
>>24982032"Sure. Make sure Julian gets cleaned up, with some bandages and new clothes. Can't have a regal dinner with him like that, can you?"
>>24982063honestly, it might be nice. I don't actually hate our mom- in fact, I still like her a lot. If she's intelligent, why, we could break her of all this bullshit. Theoretically.I mean, we want to un-corrupt-ify living lamias.
>>24982032... fuck, so that actually is something of our biological mother left in there.Now Comedy dies, and she dies bad.
>>24982032"I'm DYING of anticipation."
>>24982032<How awake are you, Mother?>
>>24982088haha, yeah. Comedy is not going to have a good death.
>>24982103we can ask her while we're eating. Good question though.
>>24982032How about we get Mage to get his translation spell ready, then get Donovan talking the Ancient Tongue
>>24982088>>24982082Hell we might even get an apology for the name.Please echo?PLEASE?
>>24982032"Jeez, talk about beating a dead horse."
>>24982123thanks. you're right though, don't want Comedy asking questions yet
>>24982032Stay calm, attempt to initiate conversation with mother dearest, making sure to do so in a language Comedy shouldn't know.
>>24981684>>24981567>comes home>opens catalog>opens Lamia Quest>...>...You fuckers. You glorious motherfuckers. You actually went and did it.
>>24982243You'd really think we'd not?
So.Is it just me, or is comedy having a hard time being taken seriously now that we've shown up?
>>24982243Operation Punster Storm
>>24982260No. This is /tg/.I just thought Comedy would attack us outright afterwards.>>24982302Stahp.
I'm looking forward to dinner. We've not eaten properly in a while, traveltime and all.Shit. It's elvish dinner. I wonder if they'll even have enough meat to feed a lamia, let alone a lamia and her zombie mother.
>>24982290Which is why she's so angry. We're making a fool of her
>>24982290We did just reduce her into a barely controlled mess. Peace isn't gonna be happy
>>24982290Her control is dead and buried.We just inserted some liveity into the situation.
>>24982320It's probably going to be people.
>>24982346all we need now is a livelier audience
>>24982362look, comedy, you KNOW I don't eat things that can talk.Get me like, a cow. And don't you tell me that it's an elf secret cows can talk. That would just ruin my dinner.
>>24982372That implies she tries to hide what it is.
>>24982362Then we simply refuse to eat and smite Comedy with even MORE prejudice.
>>24982374We just handed her a decease and desist notice.
>>24982362If comedy ruins a nice dinner like that, then her crimes are unforgivable.I can put up with nearly anything, but you don't mess up din-din time.
>>24982408we should stop with the puns for a bit though. don't want this great idea beaten to death before dinner
>>24982438yes. We're winding down on the puns.We will TRY to wind down on the puns.Later: It turns out Ssen had the lamia equivalent of a stroke just now. She can't not talk in puns.
>>24982438I just prefer sticking to the really awful puns. Sure everyone can use idioms like dead in the water, so they're repeated endlessly, but it takes guts to come out with decease and desist.
in fact... yeahhh, it'd be interesting if this was just an odd way our leviathan mind decided to cope with the horror of what we just saw, if for a while, we can only speak in puns until our mind catches up and calms down
>>24982469and a imagination that isn't dead and stagnant.
>>24982451GUIZ! GUIZ! I figured out what our snappy one-liner should be!"And that's a wrap, folks!"
Hope Echo didn't commit suicide after reading all these awful puns.
>>24982487Shit we should kill her like that. Pop her head off like we did with the ghouls a while back.
We need to tell comedy that she, as an aristocrat, should develop an appreciation for all forms of humor. Just to make sure we steal her punchline. Also, this is an interesting opportunity. We can actually speak to her over dinner. I don't know about you guys, but I always like learning more about the villains of a story.
>>24982500no, but he DID melt into dust and blow away on the wind.
>>24982518yeah, this will be a fun dinner. Assuming comedy doesn't ruin it with eating people.
>>24982527If we ask her if she thinks she's some kind of aristocrat while she's swallowing, she might choke and die.
"I'm DYING of anticipation." You say, and then sigh. "Jeez, talk about beating a dead horse.""Ummm, yes." The solider says. She looks at you with fear and confusion. Obviously baffled about how someone can be so...calm...around Comedy."Make sure Julian gets cleaned up, with some bandages and new clothes. Can't have a regal dinner with him like that, can you?" You say.He nods. "I'll see what can be done."He leads you into another room that looks like the walls were made from branches and glass. Mab, and her hair are being placed at the center of a long banquet table. Mage is placed next to her, looking very much out of his depth.Sadly, Comedy has regrouped, and now you and the other Dawnchasers have been scattered around the table. The only immediate company being their 'loved ones.' Tricia is trying to ignore the questions and gentle touches of her aunt, along with the large red ants that creep over her skin.Peri is gone. Mari's in control and trying to stay calm with Donovan talking about...personal...things regarding Peri's past.Lea is rigid and at attention. She's looking straight ahead and not doing anything without her father's nod of approval.It's obvious that they're better now, your humor getting them through he shock, but they aren't anywhere near being okay with this situation.Julian is three seats away from you, down the table. He's been given a shirt, and the blood washed off...but that's it. It looks like he's having trouble to pick up so much as a fork. The fact that he's still conscious after all of this is testament to his strength.Mother is next to you. She calmly picks apart the skinned rabbit that was set in front of the both of you.<How awake are you, Mother?> You ask.<It's very cold...and I miss my beloveds...> She says. <You were...fourth...my only.> She nods. <I don't hear the whisper...I don't feel full...I'm cold...it's very cold...>
>>24982545Poor zombie mom. I don't even know if you should kill a zombie. Or if they're just suicidal on their own, in lieu of a necromancer.My theory is zombies don't even need a necromancer once they've been raised, but will generally kill themselves unless ordered not to, since it really sucks to be a zombie. Unless they have something way more important to do than the afterlife.
>>24982545Ask her why she named us monster
>>24982545<I'm sorry you got dragged into this. You already died once, and your rest was stolen from you. You deserve better than this.>
>>24982545<I'm sorry you had to be pulled into this...and rather surprised that you could be. Do you know how you came to be here again?>
>>24982594give her a pat on the back, or a tail/tail hug, or something too. We DO miss mum, monstrous as she was.
>>24982545>zombie antsBy the Light, how horrifying!
>>24982589>>24982594>>24982612All of these
>>24982545so. How the hell do we help julian?Do we have a health potion? Can we slip health potion into his food without anyone noticing?
>>24982612I don't think we do. Honestly I got the impression that we really just pity her and are grateful she didn't have time to bite us before Liam got there.
>>24982633I'm not going to lie, given how Ssen is with the kids and grandma, I think she has some mommy issues. Though, she's working through them quite stellarly.
>>24982633We don't seem to remember very much of her. But the bad things, like kissing our sisters to sleep and naming us Monster, were the work of Citadel. If we can, it'd be nice to see how she acts outside of its influence
>>24982629He seems stable. Nothing bad is gonna happen to him if he gets left alone for the duration of the elf murdering.>>24982633Nothing has suggested that she was particularly cruel with us, weren't we playing hide and seek when daddy showed to get to purgin'
<Mother... I never knew you...> and just look at her with our head tilted slightly, perhaps a little sad, and maybe a little confused as well.
>>24982666She was busy killing our sisters. She didn't have time to do us before Liam came. I don't blame her; the whole race was driven mad by Citadel magic and turned into animals who were hardly even self-aware.
>>24982666we technically were hiding from the lightning.But yeah, our life with her wasn't awful. She wasn't cruel to us. she WAS citadel, which means she was on her way to kill us when julian arrived, but in as unpainful a way as possible.
>>24982691>>24982688Guess I need to reread some fifth humor conversations. Swore it said something when I was rereading some of the quest las tnight
<I'm sorry you got dragged into this, and a little surprised. You already died once, and your rest was stolen from you. You deserve better than this.> You say as you poke at your rabbit. You're pretty sure it's not poisoned...not that it would matter,, but you don't really have an appetite. <Do you know how you came to be here again?> You ask.She shakes her head. <I was as stone. I would feel the wagons as they went over me...it hurt...but I felt something at least...the walls scream all the time...they don't feel anything...or someone puts something in front of them and they shriek about the dark...I had warm sun.> She sighs.<Why did you call me monster?> You ask.<Because you belonged to It...and that is what It wanted you to be named.> She says. <My fangs are empty...I am empty and cold.> She looks at you and smiles. <You should eat...it still has blood in it...it makes your scales shine.>
>>24982754bastards. they turned her into a road or bridge or something...
>>24982754well, that's horrific. Good work, citadel.
>>24982754<I suppose. This will be over soon, no matter the outcome. Then it won't be so cold any more, I hope.>Hmmm, so souls that get recycled by citadel can still be salvaged in some way, but almost certainly not unscathed, and probably not returned to true life either - though, you never know, Comedy didn't need anything more than cadavers for this, so she might just have gone for the easier and less resource-intensive solution.
>>24982754>mom telling you to eatEat, then. I don't care if you swallow it whole, but you gotta stay paladin strong and healthy.<That's terrible. I had no idea there were so many, and that they were in such suffering.><Tell me; I plan on doing something about that one in the mask. What would you like to do, if she falls and holds no sway over you? I'd hate for you to go back to the stones.>
>>24982754<Thank you but, scales or no, I'll shine all the same. I think you should know I no longer belong to that which took you.>
>>24982754<That is information that is both good and saddening to hear Mother>
>>24982813there's NO FUCKING WAY we're re-embodying all of these citadel people. they legit died.The best we can do at this point is to free all the souls. Smashing the bricks might NOT be the best idea though, given how apparently they feel pain. Though smashing them might be "killing" them, which would thus free them?Augh, magic is confusing.
Oh god. Worst suspicions confirmed. All those who accept Citadel's gift become Citadel.Alright. I think we need to get Julian healed up. Use Quick-Quick to slip some healing potion into his drink.
>>24982866>Though smashing them might be "killing" them, which would thus free them?Or you just split them into a thousand different pieces forever.
>>24982866We'll find a way, but bottom line they must stay dead. We will exert the natural change which Citadel averts.
>>24982877I thought mage was in charge of healing pots
>>24982886Good point holy fuck, smashing is out of the question until we truly make sure we know what we're doing.
>>24982754We'll have to ask Mage if we manage to dispel the necromantic magic animating the bodies, where would the souls go?
>>24982754<The Masked one will make you try to kill me. It won't be long now. But before then, I want you to know that I do not belong to the Whisper. My name is Ssen, Mother. It's what I called myself when I was young. Did you... have a name? Before the Whisper?><Please know that I don't blame you, Mother. Not for when you kissed my sisters to sleep, and not for what you will soon be made to do. I will do my best to send you back to the place with the warm sun again.>
well, now I feel a bit worse about using our nightmare and wagon carrying 600 pounds of lamia and going at car speeds.That's gotta wear the roads.
I think the best way to free them is just destroying Citadel. They might have to be cobblestones again for a few weeks, but after doing it for years...
>>24982945we're arguing on how we can destroy citadel effectively at this point.it's probably NOT smashing the bricks into smaller pieces though, given how that could backfire.
>>24982897we can use lizard tongue to have him slide the potions under the table to us then use our tail to get it to Julian.Its certainly long enough.
>>24982928>Did you... have a name? Before the Whisper?It'll just be "first born" or something. Like every other lamia name ever.
>>24982967or we could pull a "Oh, Julian, you simply MUST try these, they're the best I've tasted yet" and have one handed to him.Also, I think lea is our healpotiongirl. Mage has the trollsblood.
>>24982968yeah, but we want to know.For the tombstone.
>>24982968At least we'll know it, and what's left of our Mother will know that we're free of Citadel's control.
<That is information that is both good and saddening to hear Mother. I had no idea there were so many, and that they were in such suffering. This will be over soon, no matter the outcome. Then it won't be so cold any more, I hope.> You say.<Tell me; I plan on doing something about that one in the mask. What would you like to do, if she falls and holds no sway over you? I'd hate for you to go back to the stones.> You ask.<That one does not have sway over anything.> She says. <She only asks, and It gives. There is only One who has sway over It. She pushes her rabbit towards you.><Thank you, but no. Scales or no, I'll shine all the same. I think you should know I no longer belong to that which took you.> You say.She nods. <Yes...I remember.> She says. <I wasn't yet gone when I saw you taken by the one who cut my face off and let me die...it was painful.> She looks at you. <I saw you hold him, and I watched him walk away...I hoped that you would bite him, and come back to me...and then kiss me. But you didn't.> She says. <It took a long time, and a lot of pain...and then It took me...and now I am here.> She looks at you. <But you are mine, and I love you.>
<Did you... have a name? Before the Whisper?> You ask.<Ssuah. Second born, monster.> She says.
>>24983036I think zombie mom deserves a hug.
>>24983036(dwaa)<He wasn't a bad person. He was tricked into thinking you had raided the local village He raised me well and I loved him as a father. It is because of him that I am here to kill the masked one as well as her allies. It was also because of him that I met my mate *indicate Trica* who is the daughter of one of his friends.>
>>24983059Yeah, hug time.<I am glad I got to see you, even if I am not for the circumstances.>
>>24983036>>24983059welp, that wasn't depressing at all.Alright still advocating slipping Julian a healing potion.
>>24983036>>24983059>I hoped that you would bite him, and come back to me...<I'm glad I didn't. That man's name was Liam. He was a good man, mother. What he did that day haunted him. He loved me well and raised me as his own, giving everything he had for my sake. It was his penance. I'm sorry it hurt so much, though Mother. But I'm not yours, and I'm not his. I'm my own woman now.>
>>24983059<I have called myself Ssen since that day, Mother. And as angry as I am that you have been used like this, I was glad to see you, one last time.><I didn't get a chance to say it the first time, so if I don't get to say this later, I still love you, Mother. And thank you. And... good bye.>
>>24983059Does Ssen know the name for "Second-born, loved"?
>>24983174This, but mentioning that Liam fought against "It". She knows what It is.
>>24983207It's "Ssah", the name of the little one we adopted.
you guys come up with some intelligent linesI will be busy blubbering like a bitch
>>24983232Oh, duh. Good catch!Might want to apologize to her for our words earlier, that outside of It's influence, we're glad to have had the chance to meet her as Ssah rather than just Ssuah.
>>24983192>>24983217Both of these.
Everyone but ssen:Have a much less pleasant and heartwarming re-union than Ssen is having.
we're not sorry that we didn't bite liam.we're not sorry that we went with liam.I am kind of sorry we didn't say goodbye to mom.
>>24983263Yeah, but we can't honestly say we love her. We don't even know her. Hell we were too young to remember her at all.Sidenote: The addition of that guttural 'u' after the hiss which begins the name is what designates it as "monster".
>>24983281We ought to strike up a conversation with someone else, too, if for no other reason than to distract them from bothering their intended target.
>>24983281More like, Ssen: Talk about how they're just mockeries of our former family.Proceed to have heartwarming reunion with mother.
>>24983307Granted, but it's clear that outside of It's influence she cares about Ssen.
>>24983307From what it seemed, we... sorta remembered.Like, we remembered they always found us after hiding. Also, I think "this isn't the hard part" MIGHT be something our dad said on the day he picked us up, which is why it's in our brain so hard.
>>24983317we should really do a Ssen: Apologize for harsh language earlier, it was mostly for the puns.
>>24983310Good plan, once we tie off our conversation with mother dearest.
>>24983310I don't know about the others, but I can't help but be tempted to slip a little white venom in Donovan's drink.Must be a good Paladin, must be a good Paladin...
>>24983335I'd like to talk to julian soon. he's been fucking tortured.He needs like... a cigarrete. some chicken soup. A hug. Various things.
>>24983352chicken flavored cigarette soup
>>24983352at least a snake-tail-around-ankle hug. At least.If we can slip him a healing potion with than snake tail then so be it, but the hug is more important.
>>24983352Soup flavored chicken cigarette
>>24983351Good Paladin puts down rabid animals and willfully irredeemable monsters. Maybe if he had been a bit more gentle than choosing to sterilize poor Peri with some horrible poison, we'd give more fucks about putting him down the same way, but we digress.
Should we tell zombie!mom that we became a Paladin?
>>24983393look bro.Stop trying to poison zombies.
>>24983352This indeed; Julian does seem like the one who needs the conversation most, and we can talk to the others later. Given the typical length of a formal dinner, we should have time to talk to several people before the end.
>>24983407Donovan probably isn't dead.
>>24983435he is SUPER DEAD. white eyes and rotten armstump and everything. Unless you think he's faking being a zombie.
>>24983444Missed that part. I'd assumed he was still alive, since he was when we last saw him, but looking back you're right.
>>24983444actually, faking being a zombie might be a thing. after all, why would the Dramatae kill someone who already hates us?
>>24983491Tragedy probably isn't dead. If anything he's gonna be used in the trials.
>>24983059>>24983036If not hugs, then at least put your hand on hers. Something.Fuck this is touching.
>>24983487Hate to say it, but it might not have been the Dramatae who killed him. "Our" side might have done it, after extracting all the information they could from him. They certainly made no secret of their plans to torture him.
>>24983487The Paladins executed him not the Dramatae. Remember he was a terrorist, being right or not.
>>24983487He was anti-citadel and an obnoxious uncontrolled variable.
>>24983424Anyone else getting an Imperial Banquet vibe here?
>>24983540I must admit... I don't recall any of that game but the beginning.I only played it while I was the littlest of babies
<I'm glad I didn't bite him. That man's name was Liam. He was a good man, mother. He fought It. What he did that day haunted him. He loved me well and raised me as his own, giving everything he had for my sake. It was his penance. I'm sorry it hurt so much, though Mother. But I'm not yours, and I'm not his. I'm my own woman now.><I have called myself Ssen since that day, Mother. And as angry as I am that you have been used like this, I was glad to see you, one last time.><I didn't get a chance to say it the first time, so if I don't get to say this later, I still love you, Mother. And thank you. And... good bye.>You say. You are NOT crying. Dragons never cry, and like the Mer, you can put off feeling sad and weep when it's convenient to you and you don't have elf bitches to decapitate. So you are NOT crying.You will though.You put a hand on hers. It's cold and clammy and you feel no pulse. Out of all the things, that's the bit that repulses you the most. You know hearts. Peri and Mari's odd thumps that change when they swap. Tricia's buzzing thump you know well. Lea's racing pace when she fights. Mage's slow but steady. Granny's, the girl's, Tara's, even Isen's...you know the hearts of those you care for. They're your horde after all...and Mother's is...empty.Gah! Enough of this crap. Fuck, you can SEE Comedy is just loving this. The discomfort, the fear, the denial, the pain. This ends, now.Julian needs healing. Mage has the troll blood vials that he activated, and Lea has the regular healing potions.He needs one of those. Quickly.
>>24983540Stitcher, you continue to become a classier motherfucker, thread by thread. That was one of the few good Final Fantasies. And it was -great-.
>>24983597<Mage! Can you get a vial of troll blood to me?>
>>24983597Lea. Mage is too far away for us to tail-snatch a health potion.
>>24983597Which is more effective in an immediate timeframe? Troll blood or standard healing?
>>24983626We might want to use the standard healing potions; troll blood in polite company might raise uncomfortable questions. On the other hand, using something from Mage would be an opportunity for him to show off and be magnanimous; perhaps he should be the one to offer it rather than Ssen.
>>24983623Yes but Mage could whisper sweet nothings in his beloved Mab's ear and have her use her clout in this farce to get the potion to Julian in a surreptitious fashion.
>>24983597Mage is the one who isn't dealing with undead family members right nos, so that'd be our best option I think.
>>24983597Shit we need to cool off on the dragon thoughts,we are a paladin REMEMBER THAT
>>24983597use a regular potion-troll blood might be better, but i'm not sure how Julian would feel about drinking one
>>24983651hey, it's fine if our horde is the peace, love, happiness, and freedom of those we love and have sworn to protect.That would be a paladin-as-fuck dragon if you convinced them those things held value.
>>24983622... can Lea even understand lizard-tongue? Because in terms of covertness, that's one option. Quoting scripture and prayers at Lea might be the other. I doubt Comedy would know the meanings and references
>>24983651This was Dragon in the good way. Not the egotistical way, but the "stern, stalwart fortress of principles" way.
>>24983651We are a Paladin, a Leviathan, a Dragon, a Lamia, and many other things. No sense not using our strengths, as long as we don't let any one of them take over.
>>24983680>stern, stalwart fortress of principlesSo, basically a paladin, in other words.
>>24983597we could just brass-balls say "Oh, Julian, it's been so long since we talked. Here, you must simply try the concoctions the conclave is making, the new vintage is much better than the old I'm told"grab a health potion from lea while we're talking with our tail and hand it to him.what're they going to do, STOP us from having him sample something at a snooty high class meal?
>>24983669Dragons are pretty much hardcore at whatever they are into. The problem is that their default is giant winged scaley cat that breathes fucking fire and is far more clever than most mortals.>>24983669>>24983685Good points
>>24983597>>24983679go for Lea, quote scripture and perhaps it will help her out of her terror of doing anything wrong in front of her father.
>>24983718>You look like you could use a drink, Uncle. I brought a bit of your favorite whiskey with us just in case.>Really, you look like you need it.>Just drink the Light-damned whiskey.
>>24983718>could just brass-balls...>Dawnchasers>Implying our -default- course of action doesn't require more brass balls than a steampunk bukkake jamboree.
>>24983754>I really appreciate the thought, lass but I don't think whiskey is what I need right now.>I've been trying to cut back lately, I'm fine.>Alright alright... It tastes a bit funny.
You take a deep breath. Well, you've been getting pretty far already by going over the top. Might as well see how far you can go with this."Oh, Julian, it's been so long since we talked. Here, you must simply try the concoctions the conclave is making, the new vintage is much better than the old I'm told." You turn to Lea. "Lea, if you would?"Lea looks up at you. You never thought that she could look like a little girl more than she does right now. She even has her hood pulled up over her head as much as she can."Lea. What is that?" Her father asks."That's Paladin Ssen Patrick, Father." She says. "She's my commander.""She's a lamia." He says."Yes, Father.""You take orders from a monster?""She's not a monster, Father. She's a Paladin, and a friend." She says."So, a lamia became a Paladin before you did. Hmm." He says."I'm sorry, Father." Lea says."I didn't say anything, Lea." The corpse says. "You still remember the Teachings?""Yes, Father.""You still practice those forms I taught you?""Yes, Father.""Well, I'm sure you'll be a Paladin eventually then. Until then, you can serve the lamia who became one first. Maybe you'll learn a few things from her, and fix your flaws.""Yes, Father." She says."Good, now eat your rabbit.""Yes, Father." Lea says.
>>24983733even if scripture doesn't knock her out of it, we should probably start with her for backing up our companions. Everyone else has gotten at least a little bit of closure, Lea hasn't
>>24983855"Leeeaa." Snap our fingers. "Remember where we are. Now, about that conclave concoction."
>>24983855Ugghhhh Lea you poor thing! God damn it that's it; once we turn Comedy inside out we are making this woman feel as fucking beautiful as she deserves to, and teaching her to relax.
>>24983855Whisper to Lea: "You remember when you verbally kicked me in the tail and reminded me how to be a Paladin when I'd started to forget? And if you say 'Yes, Father', I'm going to scream."
>>24983855Rub Lea's back with your tail while handing Julian a potion"All are perfect in the Light. Lea has gotten as far as she has because of her flaws, not in spite of them. She has taught me more things than I could ever hope to teach her, and saved my life more than I can count. If you feel the need to try and destroy everything your daughter, my companion and friend, has done, I would ask you to shut your mouth until you have something better to say."
>>24983957I don't think we CAN whisper to lea here.But we should bring up that Lea knows way more about being a proper paladin than us, and the only reason we are a paladin in the first place is because we're quite unwise. Diving in front of poison and all that.
>>24983997I like this one. Lea's a fucking boss, we need to talk her up."Also, once I swear she punched a hole right through a guy"
>>24983855This to Lea:"You have a stronger faith than anyone I know, myself included. You've already proven it time and time again."And>>24983997this to her father.
>>24983855"LEA - you're good. Are we clear?""Now if you will, kindly pass that tasty little refreshment to Uncle Julian. Julian, I think you'll find this is even tastier than the whiskey you usually go in for. It's a bit peaty by my tastes, but I'm sure you'll like it."
>>24983855"Well, I DID have the advantage of being raised by a paladin. He was never so harsh as you seem to be."
(Smiling)Lea has done more than anyone to keep me on a righteous path. Her advice and her skills, not to mention being a close personal friend, make her invaluable to me. I don't now where I'd be without her!
>>24983913"Leeeaa." You snap your fingers. "Remember where we are. Now, about that Conclave concoction.""Father, I'm being given orders by my Paladin." She says."If you feel you have to be rude at a royal table, then that's fine." Her father says. "Just know that your actions have consequences for your entire family.""Everyone is dead, Father." Lea says."Lea. You know better. Teachings 35:12, Lea. What is it?" Her father says with a little bit of steel in his voice."That what we lose we have not lost. That which has left us has not left. Memory remains, and that is eternal. It stays with us, shapes us, and we shape them." She says. "Honor them, for it is what you can never lose.""You're using common language and the New Summers Translation." He says. "Was the Newgate Translation suddenly declared obsolete after I died?""No, Father. I'm sorry, Father."He nods. "Summers Day is considered an adequate translation, but you should not use common language, dear. Those are the Holy Words, not just some soup recipe." He pats her on the shoulder. "We'll go over them again later, and make sure you aren't making more mistakes.""Thank you, Father." She takes a stuttering breath. "But I'm still getting up and giving my friend this vial."She stands up from her seat and tosses you a vial of the potion.Comedy just glares at Lea's father.He shakes his head and looks at her. Then he turns away from her when she sits down."I'm sorry, Father. That had to be done."He says nothing."Father..."Nothing."Father, please...it's for the other Paladin...Father..."Still nothing."Yes, I was bad...I'm sorry Father. You're right." She sinks into her seat.
>>24984111Oooh boy dis gonna be good.
>>24984111hmm. It seems that Lea is REALLY stuck in this one. She's trapped in some kind of parental hell.
>>24984111"One of you recites the teachings, one of you lives them out in her daily life. I'd choose the latter over a "proper translation" any time, and it is NEVER something that requires an apology."
>>24984111I dunno if we should ask the guy, "In what way are you right?" He gives any book answer, we can go "Are you the paladin here? No you're not. Be silent."
>>24984111What's Lea's last name?"Mr. (Name, or just Lea's Father), I'll have you know as a Paladin of His Light that the common tongue is the only appropriate tongue for spreading the message of the light. It is the most accessible language, and as such spreads His Light the most effectively.I believe it is also against His Teachings to be an asshole, so cut it out."
>>24984111Give Julian the potion.Lea, you know why the Newgates Translation isn't the best source. And why. And to speak common is needed otherwise how would you reach those who do not speak other? Your father is wrong to reprimend you.Then qoute something to do with how the dead cannot see the world of the living and so the living must make their own decisions. Change is eternal after all.
>>24984111"Thank you very much, Lea. You've done quite well, regardless of what he says. You live the teachings much better than he does."
>>24984111This:>>24984020, but also, does Ssen know enough of the Teachings to dredge up something about faith caring about actions rather than words, and that the words are empty without the faith behind it? He's got the forms, but has lost all purpose. She has more faith than he ever will, and the purpose of quoting the Teachings is to teach, not to demonstrate memorization.
>>24984176"A faith that is not lived is a shallow faith indeed."
>>24984111Wow, she has issues. I mean, we knew that, but this is worse than I was expecting.
>>24984226FUCK if Ssen knows the teachings. I don't think our pappy was super into making us memorize or learn that stuff.Ssen really has very little in the way of education. She came from a peasant town.
>>24984254I'm hoping that something like that would be a pretty well-known quote (though perhaps not in Citadel lands, where the form and the empty words are all that matter). It's also exactly the kind of key passage that Liam would mention.
>>24984111"Lea. Words are wind. You walk in the light more than your father ever did. Don't let his twisted emotional manipulation forget how noble and beautiful a person you know, hell we ALL know you are."
Ssen knew her scripture well enough. The priest was one of the few who accepted her beyond Trisha so she must of spent some time talking to him.
>>24984270Perhaps it should be mentioned that knowing/memorizing all the verses of some holy book or teaching doesn't automatically make someone a good person? Especially if they just speak it but don't seriously practice the meaning behind all of the sayings?
>>24984305That's exactly what I was going for, yeah. Much like the conversation we had with Lea last thread about the Light, the Great Phoenix, and the Summerlands; if Lea can accept differences like that as readily as she did, what translation of the Teachings someone chooses to use pales into insignificance.
>>24984340Lea was also the first person to point out that Ssen may have been going down the path of being a murderhobo and/or dragon. Everybody else was pretty much fine with it, but Lea was the person who stood up and reminded the Paladin that she may have been straying too far from the Light's teachings in favor of overthrowing Citadel.There's a speech here about Lea's father that involves that stuff that Batman said to Superman during Infinite Crisis. Something along the lines of "The teachings of the light say that all of its followers should inspire those around them to do good. Not just to parrot the sermons and creeds and verses; but to genuinely help people to better themselves and the people and the world around them, so that all may flourish even during the hardest of times. And let's face it... the last time you really inspired anyone to be so much more than they were was when you died."
>>24984111I'm fairly certain the teachings have something to say about those who would twist their words towards evil ends.And to use them to frighten and abuse your daughter is a much a perversion of the light and it's teachings as I have seen, and I have seen some terrible things.You have no right to attempt to school Lea in the teachings. She knows them better than you, and more importantly she LIVES them better than you ever have.
You glare at Mr. Ughruda. "A faith that is not lived is a shallow faith. Teachings 10:1. One of you recites the teachings, one of you lives them out in her daily life. I'd choose the latter over a "proper translation" any time, and it is NEVER something that requires an apology."Thank you very much, Lea. You've done quite well, regardless of what he says. You walk in the light more than your father ever did. Don't let his twisted emotional manipulation forget how noble and beautiful a person you know, hell we ALL know you are.""The teachings of the light say that all of its followers should inspire those around them to do good. Not just to parrot the sermons and creeds and verses; but to genuinely help people to better themselves and the people and the world around them, so that all may flourish even during the hardest of times. And let's face it... the last time you really inspired anyone to be so much more than they were was when you died."Also, Supplementary to the Teachings by Paladin Liam Patrick, 6:5 Ratified by Her Illuminated Self in the Seventh Age, "Those who would lay down others to feel themselves highest only serve to push all away from His Light.' Modern translation as by Ssen Patrick, 'Thou Shalt Not Be An Asshole."Lea stares at you, and then she pulls her hood down and sits up straight. She nods at you in thanks and then takes her mouth bandages away and starts to eat.(cont)
>>24984627You go over to Julian and pour the healing potion into a goblet."Here." You say. "It's not exactly your favorite whiskey, but I think you'll like it."A shaking hand takes it...you have to help him get the goblet to his lips. He drinks it greedily, some of it spilling over his lips and onto the shirt. He finishes it with a pant."By His Light...I thought you were a delusion from the pain." He swallows. "That elf by your friend. He's not supposed to be. I put his corpse into the furnace myself in Citadel." He grabs your arms. "I don't know the how...but I know the WHAT. The elves don't know. But I've seen it. I never thought of it...but now...oh by His Light..." He swallows and looks at you. "You never lived in Citadel. So you never knew...but now I know why there are no graveyards, undertakers, or funerals in Citadel." He shudders. "There is no rain in Citadel...and no death. At least, not in private. People just 'leave' their houses empty, but everyone knows they're dead...I've seen where they all go." He looks ill. "She made them from that...mountain that they keep." He looks at Comedy. She's just idly eating her rabbit and salad. Not a care in the world. "Ssen...you have to forgive me." He says. "I thought your Father had gone senile when he told me the Truth."
>>24984640"There is nothing to forgive. I had not thought even Citadel capable of something so twisted until very recently, when some dear friends of mine told me right before they met that fate themselves."
>>24984640"Oh no, it's a completely mad story. Nobody in their right mind would believe it, unless they saw it at work themselves. Living cities and masked conspiracies and all that."
>>24984640I don't blame you for not believing Uncle. Citadel has been synoumous for prosperity... and most would say how that could be evil?But it is. Oh how it is evil. It is nothing but the Darkest of places. My birth mother just told me she has been a bridge before that woman brought her here in a false body. It eats souls to grow.
>>24984640If I hadn't seen it myself, I would call you mad even now Uncle. Father never told me, I had to make that discovery on my own.
>>24984640"Glad you're back with us, Julian. Stay that way for a while, would ya?"Can we eat that rabbit yet? I'm getting my appetite back.
>>24984640>that... mountain that they keepI am afraid to ask of what the mountain is made of.
>>24984838Tears and broken dreams.
quick, whats the biggest building in Citadel?
>>24984847To be fair, the other ~99% of it is human ashes and unburnt bonemeal.
>>24984861the castle.Made of a mountain.What do they keep in the mountaincastle?
>>24984874The Heart of course. And probably the mouth to feed Citadel as well.>suddenly remdinded of Dungeon Keeper by having a living heart for a city
>>24984640>comedy doesn't give a shit we're having a wonderful dinnerContinue having a wonderful dinner in spite of her to show we give EVEN LESS OF A SHIT.
"Oh no, it's a completely mad story. Nobody in their right mind would believe it, unless they saw it at work themselves. Living cities and masked conspiracies and all that." You say, you smile at him. "Citadel has been synoumous for prosperity... and most would say how that could be evil?"But it is. Oh how it is evil. It is nothing but the Darkest of places. My birth mother just told me she has been a bridge before that woman brought her here in a false body. "It eats souls to grow."Julian shakes his head. "Vile.""There is nothing to forgive. I had not thought even Citadel capable of something so twisted until very recently, when some dear friends of mine told me right before they met that fate themselves.""How many souls have I sent to that Darkness?" He says. He takes a deep breath. "No...I can't break apart now." He looks at you and nods. "Get me a blade, and I'm ready.""Glad you're back with us, Julian. Stay that way for a while, would ya?" You give him a smile and a wink.Julian chuckles. "You look like your father when you do that...usually that ended up with something flooded, broken, or on fire."
>>24984916Probably all three I'm afraid. We'll try to keep it to her place of refuge though.Lets see how Tricia is doing next.
>>24984916Tricia next; she should be easier to snap out of it. She's uncomfortable, but not necessarily mentally scarred like Lea. She's already coming to terms with how she is now, and we've already had that conversation with her many a time, the last several times she started "babbling".
>>24984916"...I guess I really am a daddy's girl, huh.
>>24984916"You know, I really try to avoid the broken, flooded fires. They just keep happening. Must be a family curse."
>>24984916"The way we work, something will be flooded, broken AND on fire before we are done."
>>24984916I have yet to flood AND burn a thing at the same time, but Light willing I will try.Let's meet the Aunt. It's important to know our in-laws!
>>24984916I expected nothing less and hope for one decapitated elf.
>>24984952yeah, tricia is probably the one who least needs our help.We should perhaps check in with peri and donovan, but I don't know how to make dead-ex-boyfriend less creepy.
>>24984916"Oh no, it's more dire than that. We plan on pulling this one off peacefully. Brace for the worst."
"The way we work, something will be flooded, broken AND on fire before we are done." You shrug. "I try to avoid them, but I think it might be a family curse."You slide over to where Tricia is. She looks up at you. "Get. Me. Out. Of. Here." She says through gritted teeth.Auntie is gorging herself on a rabbit and salad that are both covered with heaps of honeycomb, sugar cane, and molasses. Tricia points down. She's got large red ants crawling over her. "Be glad you don't talk insect dance and pheremones." Tricia says. "She will not shut up. At all."
>>24984952agree. After that we just have Mari slap Donovan, because Mari isn't traumatized, just Peri,, and Donovan deserves to be slapped
>>24985061Ssen: Barely suppress a giggle and look down to see if any of the ants appear to literally be dancing before continuing other actions.
>>24985061and here I thought we were just talking to people over a table. I guess we're moving about.Also, Tricia's situation is comical from the outside. An AUNT made of ANTS who just jabbers on? Priceless.
>>24985061snakes eat insects. Be the Predator whisper (hiss) at her aunt.
>>24985061"Someone should really tell her to not talk when her mouth is full. It's rude."
>>24985061"Sorry, the rest of you really got raw deals. I'm having a rather pleasant meal."
>>24985061We already found out that Tricia's bugs aren't affected by liquid when they're part of her skin, when she fell in the fountain after we teleported away from Tragedy's manor. So, we could "accidentally" spill some water on the ants. Not exactly subtle, though.Similarly, does Tricia have any predatory bugs around? Perhaps some that might want some crunchy little ant snacks?More subtly: strike up a distracting conversation with the aunt and see if she can hold two conversations at once, especially when the one out loud involves talking to a Leviathan.
>>24985061That's Tricia's last name?We don't fucking know anyone's last names."Ms. (tricia's last name), you should really give Tricia her personal space. She's not a little girl any more, doesn't need the pinches on the cheek."
>>24985182and then we get to have Tricia in wet clothes.Sorry that was completely inappropriate, but your plan is a good one.
>>24985223NOT IN THE ELVISH BANQUET ROOM
>>24985061Introduce ourselves to the Aunt.I'm sorry but you have me at a disadvantage, I don't speak insect. I do speak lizard though! So you're Tricia's Aunt? I'm so glad to meet you!Lets get chatty.
>>24985243Or we could pretend to speak insect, have them crawl on Ssen, and then all die due to a touch of exuded poison.
>>24985270She hasn't done anything to get that treatment yet.Yet.
>>24985243>>24985270we totally don't speak insect.Though, I am 100% for plan "get chatty". though, chat implies short little questions and answers. That might be hard to do in our format. Either way, let's go with things like tastes in food or paintings. Things that are unrelated to matters of import.
"Someone should really tell her to not talk when her mouth is full. It's rude." You whisper. "Sorry, the rest of you really got raw deals. I'm having a rather pleasant meal."You clear your throat and look at Tricia's aunt."Ms. Greats, you should really give Tricia her personal space. She's not a little girl any more, doesn't need the pinches on the cheek."She looks at you."I'm sorry but you have me at a disadvantage, I don't speak insect. I do speak lizard though!" You say."You are a lamia. Also you have little Tricia's scent and pheromones all over you..." She pauses. "You two are together? How lovely, I had a female brood-host once. Your tail must be able to fit many many larvae." She smiles at you. "Has my Tricia planted any of herself within you?"Tricia goes beet red. "Don't answer that!" She snaps.
>>24985359Bugs in the cloaca~I love how you took that and ran with it.
>>24985359Laugh. That's some funny shit.>>24985382Not in the long-lost-relative-reunion!
>>24985359Laugh. "Only a few times, but this isn't really appropriate dinner conversation."
>>24985382>>24985359Bugs? In my cloca?More possible in canon that you think!
>>24985359"If you don't mind, ma'am, I'd rather you not embarrass your niece or have me say anything that would do the same-polite company and all. I would love to get to know you better though, you seem like a wonderful woman. Perhaps after dinner?"
>>24985359I'm sorry its rude to discuss such matters at the table.
>>24985359"Why, I'm taken aback. you should know a lady's love life isn't proper talk for a fancy dinner like this. Gossip comes after!"
>She was talking about planting larva in a living host. Ouch.
>>24985407no do not say this.it is a secret to everybody. And we only tried it that one time. And it was really unpleasant for everyone.
>>24985359I think Tricia just did answer that for her.
>>24985395>>24985407No laughing at Tricia's embarassment.>>24985359"I'd ask if your insects have as dirty a mind as you do, but I've seen what royal jelly does to someone, and you have to have a mind for it to be dirty."
>>24985424yes. she was. we do it... a different way.This is all extremely embarrassing.
>>24985440>we do it... a different way.Yeah, we're making plans for Ssen to bone Tricia. Rib bone, specifically. And how did I not realize until just now that we were pulling an Adam? More symbolism, Echo?
>>24985359Laugh a little, "No, no children yet! We're waiting to settle down after all this is over."
this is terrible and horrifying. We may have to cancel plan "have kids with tricia" on grounds that they'll be monstrosities. In the "I should not be" kind of sense.
>>24985458Oh man, we kind of ARE pulling an Adam.
>>24985474nonononono we're PALADIN SATAN. not Adam.
>>24985474>>24985458except we used out funny bone
>>24985359"That's hardly a conversation for the dinner table. Or for my wife's arm, if you don't mind, if your insects dance as dirty as you talk."
>>24985359just stare at her for a second, then say "wow, that is such a wildly inappropriate question its actually kinda impressive that you'd ask it in public."
>>24985493I think she may still technically be our girlfriend.Sine it's a dragon BONDING, not a dragon marriage. Dragons don't have marriage. We still have to get normal married.The rest I'm cool with.
>>24985483Better to reign in Stone Hall than serve in Citadel.>>24985505We still want to do the formal wedding as something we can invite family and friends to, but we already did the "you are mine and I am yours" thing; doesn't get much closer than that.That and we already said it once:>>24981684
>>24985061>Auntie is gorging herself on a rabbit and salad that are both covered with heaps of honeycomb, sugar cane, and molasses.Wasp witches -really- love sugar...First downtime we get, we're baking Trish a pecan pie. She'd love it, and we'd get to try our hand at something which isn't an anarchic justice crusade.
>>24985473We have a much better plan than the disturbing one her aunt has in mind. And that one isn't one to share at the dinner table, either.
>>24985541>implying we can bake ANYTHING made mostly out of fruit properlyI say we cook her a honey ham.
>>24985541>First downtime we get, we're baking Trish a pecan pie. She'd love it, and we'd get to try our hand at something which isn't an anarchic justice crusade.And now I'm curious if Ssen can cook.
>>24985493"That's hardly a conversation for the dinner table. Or for my wife's arm, if you don't mind, if your insects dance as dirty as you talk." You say. "I'd ask if your insects have as dirty a mind as you do, but I've seen what royal jelly does to someone, and you have to have a mind for it to be dirty."She sneers at you. "You are a very rude monster. No wonder Tricia likes you, you are vastly too much like her father." Her ants retreat into her body and Tricia sags with relief. "I officially would like dinner to be over." Tricia says. "When are we going to try and kill Comedy?"
>>24985575"Don't worry hun, we'll do it soon. I'm just going to check on Mage."
>>24985502That works for me.
>>24985560Pecan pie is really just pecans, corn syrup and a fuckboat of molasses. It's ridiculously sweet.
>>24985575"Honestly, I was going to wait until after the trials."
>>24985598Is that a metric or imperial fuckboat?
>>24985575"After the trials I'm afraid. We must deny dear Thistle her army of elves and killing her now will force Mab to defend her."Now to Mari and Peri.
>>24985541or Pear roasted in Maple syrup and bacon. (damn I need to find that episode of Iron Chief)
>>24985575"as soon as we are sure the fay court won't try and stop us. "
>>24985592why mage? No one is bugging him.
>>24985592mage is probably fine, Peri however...
>>24985575"As soon as we won't get murdered by the elves for harming dear sweet Thistleblossom. Why, getting antsy?">>24985630Yeah, we'll save him for last; he'll probably need some backup with Mab and Comedy, but only after we've helped the others. Mari and Peri next, definitely.
>>24985562mage has TOLD us we can't cook. And he does all our cooking for us at this point.
>>24985575"when the time is right."
>Lamia cookingWe're going to kill her.
>>24985608It's a Scandinavian fuckboat, which is equal to three greek fucktriremes.
"After the trials I'm afraid. We must deny dear Thistle her army of elves and killing her now will force Mab to defend her.""Ugh." Tricia says. "Do we REALLY need them?"
>>24985654Yeah, unfortunately, but hey, if something goes awry, it's a melee.
>>24985654At the very least, we can't let them fall under Citadels sway.
>>24985654"It's not that we need them, so much as we're saving them."
>>24985654Perhaps not. But I think earning a debt from Mab will help for a long time after Citadel falls.
>>24985654"One less army against us would be nice. One more on our side would be even better.">>24985681That too.
>>24985654"we don't need them, but we need to keep them as safe as possible."
>>24985641for inspirationhttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qYNeT2nzEgAjoffrey is Donovan.
>>24985654"Less that we need them, more that we need the Masked Bitch NOT to have them. If it's any consolation, I think Mab won't need convincing. She seems to be looking for any way out she can find."
>>24985654Still tempted to ask her if she's getting antsy. Just because it's exactly the kind of thing Ssen would say.
To whoever archived this thread: you made a fine choice of tags.
>>24985771... yes.the puns must never stop.
>>24985647good thing she can just sort of make the bugs eat it for her.Hopefully she won't throw up again.
>>24985796At this point I'm pretty sure that the puns have become some sort of pseudo-prayer to the light for us. In the way that anything Comedy hates is good.Onward, Pungeon Masters!
>>24985823no, I think it's just a combination of the fact that A. Ssen likes puns and B. Ssen likes how much comedy hates puns.
"It's not that we need them, so much as we're saving them." You say. "But I think earning a debt from Mab will help for a long time after Citadel falls." You say, then you smile at her. "So, you're not getting antsy are you?"Tricia gives you a look. "Keep making puns like that and see what happens."You slide over to Mari. She is just poking her food. She looks up at you and just shakes her head at you and jerks for you to move on.
>>24985841"That bad, huh?"
Give her shoulder a reassuring squeeze and lover boy a not so reassuring squeeze.
Man, for someone called Comedy she sure is uptight.At some point we need to ask her "Why so serious?"
then off to Mage
>>24985841As long as Mari has the situation in had."Just let her know I'm here."
>>24985841Probably best to take the hint. I'd bet Mari has this one covered with some internal conversation. But cock our head sideways at Mari a bit first, and try to get a nonverbal "are you sure?".Then head over to Mage, Mab, and Comedy.
>>24985841"You hang in there, peri." to peri."Donovan." and a tip of the circlet to donovan.move on.
>>24985863nope, Mari's just got this.The advantage of having to minds in one body.Peri can just wait on a mental beach for this to pass.
>>24985841Do the paladin smile.Then give donovan the paladin glare.Then on to mage.pic related, the closest i've seen to a paladin smile.
>>24985841nod and start to move on, but not before warning Donnovan to not get handsy
whatever you do, keep it real simple and short.
>>24985795Why, thank you.
Mari seems to have this handled for peri. I wonder how mage is doing. Master dagda.
>>24985923That's just adding insult to injury.It's brilliant.
>>24985923I thought we were trying to stop with the puns.Oh god Ssen can't stop can she?
>>24986180A few days form now it'll get annoying and we'll just start begging for help in tears, while still making puns.
>>24986180nope, and since comedy isn't living up to his title, Ssen's a dead ringer for funniest person at the banquet
>>24985923>nod and start to move on, but not before warning Donnovan to not get handsyI didn't even catch the pun here until>>24986165reminded me of his current state. Nicely done, and we should *definitely* say this.
>>24986210comedy is a she. All the male dramatae have died or been unmasked.
>>24986257So I guess all we have left are drama queens?
>>24986180Not until Comedy's head explodes. And even if we pull that off, that'll just encourage us.
>>24986290...can we roll for this?
>>24986305>>24986290but we need that head
>>24986315SHITWE DIDN'T GET TRAGEDY'S HEAD.
>>24986341Tragedy is not dead, he's at the grove.We don't know that IC.
>>24986315I'm willing to bet that Old One will accept some dripping pieces and the most punderful story ever in lieu of it, as long as we have the others.
>>24986203>I have grave news, I can't decease making puns! No seriously, it's Bee-coming a major buzzkill. AAAUGH!
>>24986443>... HELP ME TRICIA... HELP... ME...
>>24986473>>24986443guys stop joking about this or echo will make it true
>>24986433Maybe not. I get the strange feeling he doesn't like puns. Or humor in general.
>>24985923this one works. better'n mine.
>>24986511Who's joking?>>24986519I don't know about that, but I think he'd deeply appreciate the idea of slaying Comedy with them.
>>24986541"Ah Little Dragon, you slew your enemies with their own namesake."
"That bad, huh?" You ask.Mari shrugs."You hang in there, Peri." You say, squeezing the girls' shoulder."Donovan." You say."Serpent." He growls.You two give each other appropriate glares and then move on.Mage is next to Mab and...well...he's looking a little relieved."My Queen, I present to you, the famed Paladin Serpent. One of my...followers." He gestures to her. "As you can see, even the mighty Paladins bow before me, for they know who I am." He gestures for you to bow, while mouthing 'sorry.' "Show your deference to your betters, Paladin Patrick."
>>24986616"Of course, it's only natural to bow before royalty."How low of a lamiabow can we do without being inappropriately low-bowing? because we can really go as low as we want.
>>24986639I mean, right? Paladins bow before the respective royals of countries, right? We've done it for princess mumei and Isen's family.
>>24986616"Of course my Lord."
>>24986616Bow as only a lamia can.Completely truthfully: "I would follow him to the very ends of the earth."
>>24986639That won't really sell it to the Elves of the Special Snowflake. This isn't something we'd do for just any royalty; in their eyes, only Dagda the Good could dream of commanding such loyalty and respect.
>>24986725hmmmmmmM. that might be true. I'm not sure. Feel free to discard my suggestion.
>>24986776>>24986672This also means:Mage, you cannot escape us.
>>24986792Heh. I hadn't even thought of that interpretation, but I bet Mage would.
>>24986672Gonna have to go with this
"Of course my Lord." You bow as only a lamia can, your entire body dipping to the ground with your head looking up. "I would follow him to the ends of the earth."Mage looks a little touched and mostly embarrassed.Mab looks impressed. "So..." She clears his throat. "I have decided that the tasks will be done. To prove to one and all that this is my beloved Dagda, returned to us to help us restore ourselves to glory...and get us back on the right path.""I'm happy to have my Daddy back!" Comedy chirps. "I'll do the last task.""Traditionally, darling daughter...I do the la-" She stops as a glare from Comedy. "Yes...of course.""The first task is always set by the people themselves." She declares to the room. "Is there any here who would set him a task? Something to prove this man's strength is that of Dagda's?"Comedy looks at you then, she points to Mother and then she points to Lea's father. Then she gestures to you.She wants you to pick one. Ohh, this can't be good.
>>24986847Do we have a coin?Do we want to make a "heads or tails" joke?
>>24986847>"The first task is always set by the people themselves." She declares to the room. "Is there any here who would set him a task? Something to prove this man's strength is that of Dagda's?"So, they're looking for a feat of strength. Lea's father would likely have martial artist skills similar to Lea's style, and he would be entirely antagonistic. Ssuah would be have all the fighting prowess of a Lamia, but seems somewhat friendly to Ssen at least. We could hint to her to play along a bit, have Mage take some of the antivenom we've prepared, and put on a show here.
>>24986897>antivenomShe's been dead for ages. The venom decays really quickly, remember. Also she actually told us.><My fangs are empty...I am empty and cold.>
>>24986937Ah, you're right. That'll make the show even easier.
Mage would have an easier time with lea's dad in a fair fight, I think.I don't know if we're allowed to champion for him. And we can't be sure that citadel will allow our mummy to pull punches, even if she agrees to it.
>>24986951Given that the purpose of the test is to demonstrate strength, not loyalty, he almost certainly can't declare a champion.And I don't think Mage would have any easier of a time with Lea's father. Plus, who says he's going to fight fair?
>>24986951leas dad taught her how to fight. he's probably about as skilled as she is. i'd wager a venom less lamia would be an easier foe.
>>24986985well, I DO suppose that citadel lamias don't have access to quick-quick...
>>24986847It occurs to me that this doesn't necessarily have to be a fight. It needs to be a show of strength.If he has access to levitation magic, he could show that he can lift a full-grown Lamia, for instance.
I guess people are voting for the mummy then.
I say we pick our mother to pick a test of strength.
>>24987084"Constrict that moose to death"
>>24987090stone to mudmud to stoneOne constricted moose.
>>24987107(or we just lend him some scales so he can go Lamia.)
>>24987107I wasn't arguing against it, I'd legitimately like to see mage be given physical challenges.Preferably fighting a guy with a giant Q tip, but beggars can't be choosers.
>>24987122It needs to be flesh. And I doubt he's very keen to do ghoul transformation again.
>>24987150nah, his sister did fine with Lamia scales.
>>24987165His sister is not someone he's going to be eager to emulate.
>>24987165No, it needs to be flesh for ghoul magic. The lamia was one of her "favorite forms", she already had it. The scales were just a tasty snack.
>>24987165(And she didn't use those to transform, she just ate them. Plus, remember what Old One said about scales versus flesh and blod.)
Neither of these choices are SURELY bad. Really, either could turn out okay!
(I picked our mother because Lea's father is shure to demand a barehanded fight.)
>>24987235Okay, so...this is the Test of Strength decided by the 'populace' and obviously influenced by Comedy. She's letting you make the call though, do you pick Mother or Lea's Father.Calling for a vote.
>>24987255I see this being a sort of twisted fight to the death. I feel Mage, has a slightly better chance against Lea's father than Ssen's mother.
>>24987255I thought we picked the mother?She'll probably choose an easier physical challenge. Or prove to be an easier challenge, maybe.Assuming mage doesn't have a phobia of fighting snakes from his time with us.
I'd pick Lea's dad for the purpose of having Mage kick his ass, but Mom has less unknowns. Call in the family!
THE CHALLENGE:Arm wrestling. Tara style.
>>24987255Lea's father, he wont be expecting lightning bolts.
>>24987376its a test of strength. pretty sure no obvious magic.
>>24987285Among other things, Mage had access to the information in the book Julian wrote, about how to fight lamias.>>24987255We could be a bit showy about it, as well: "If a test of strength is called for, there are few who can match the strength of a lamia, my liege Dagda among them. Perhaps a sparring match, then?"And/or we could fish for what the terms of such a contest would be, since some types of contests would favor one choice over the other.
>>24987391let's not actively suggest combat now. It could just be lifting a rather large rock.
>>24987391from what I understand we are picking who picks the actual contest.
>>24987408Yeah, that's why I suggested fishing for the terms.
>>24987391>Mage had access to the information in the book Julian wroteGood point, and we pointed out the weak spots during the fight with his sister as well. I hope he remembers them.
You gesture to your mother. Comedy nods.Ssuah rises up. "I have a challenge for this would-be Dagda." She says. "A true elf king can withstand any pressure and any bonds. Dagda's strength was enough to rip trees in twain." She says. It sounds like she's reciting from a script, or someone else has put words in her mouth. "So, Dagda, break free of my coils and I will say that you are who you are.""That is the challenge 'Daddy,' one you MUST take alone." She giggles. "So...are you going to accept this..or admit that you're nothing but Citadel spies and trespassers who have been QUITE rude during dinner?"Mage looks at you for a moment.
>>24987500man, that's a great challenge. Anyone got a stupid idea?
>>24987500breaking bonds and endurance.... staring contest? also sleep spell on Ssuah?
>>24987500Point to Mage, attempt to gallop like a horse, fail miserably. Pout.
>>24987500Breaking out of our coils is what, 16+? And he'll probably get a bonus if he can distract her by smacking her weak spot. And she's weak because she's rotting. He can totally do it. We've faced worse odds. Although I really hope we're not still using the average system because we'll never get an average that high.
>>24987541"I'm sure he'll overcome that challenge with great HASTE."this is a stupid idea.
>>24987500Well, if Comedy has this much control, it seems unlikely that Mage can fully count on a helpful opponent, though it can't hurt to try.Are lamias ticklish?More seriously: lamias are somewhat cold-blooded, and Mage has enough control over cold to freeze things, so if Mage could exude cold that would work nicely.>>24987564He hasn't practiced casting it on humans or lamia.>>24987541What idea are you getting at there?
>>24987500"I shiver with anticipation."
>>24987574he was attempting to get at the haste spell.
I'm kinda puzzled at what good the haste spell would do here too.
>>24987589Cast on what target, for what effect? Not like he can safely cast it on himself.
>>24987607It increases muscle size.but that DOESN'T MATTER.because we can force a success on any action with a successful beacon charge.Is there any non-combat way to do that?
>>24987621He has to do it alone, and Beacon is not even remotely subtle.
>>24987574>More seriously: lamias are somewhat cold-blooded, and Mage has enough control over cold to freeze things, so if Mage could exude cold that would work nicely.Hmmm, though, would that even work on one without bloodflow? Though, she *did* say she was cold...
>>24987538>sleep spell on Ssuah?That one works by affecting bloodflow, which might not work here.
well, he could simply spot-weld his way out of mummy dearest's grasp.It's just not... so great.
>>24987500If Comedy is exerting control over Ssuah and the others with a spell, could Mage take it over by using her true name? That would probably help.
We might have to acknowledge this was a stupid plan and just start killing elves.It's a very real possibility.
>>24987549I think he can definitely pull it off. Cold might help, hasting himself might work as a last resort though it's more insane than most Dawnchaser plans (including the one that got us here in the first place), and in any case it's not like he can't keep trying a couple of times. Just make a show of it.
I think making her cold would work actually. "My Lord she complained of the Cold. Please don't make it worse. Though I know her little she still is my mother."
Okay, CHOICES:Mage could try FREEZING his way out. It would eventually stop the lamia, whether she's cold blooded or not, by sheer frozenness. He would then squirm out of the frozen coils.Mage could SPOT WELD his way out. This is horrible, but would work.Mage could try DANGEROUS HASTE on himself. Some chance of explosion.He could try SLEEP VARIANT on the zombie, to move blood around, but it probably won't do anything.Any more options?
>>24987764Too overt, I think, but yeah.
>>24987769we could always offer some of our flesh to mage, lamia transformation?
>>24987769Slipperiness. Stone to mud underneath himself and slipping out down rather than up. Cooperative Ssuah. Flesh-shaping magic, if that wouldn't break the "on his own" requirement.
so cold to weaken her and haste to buff himself? now how do we signale that to him... maybe something like "to think that dagda would get such a cold reception. I'm sure he will overcome this challenge with great haste."
>>24987769guys, remember he's a dragon servant. He gets some of our might.
>>24987775"Try not to be too cold blooded about it, m'lord."Is this the appropriate level of innuendo?
>>24987769Raw muscle power is always an option, though not a very good one.
>>24987804That'll definitely help, I think.And we haven't actually seen many opportunities for him to demonstrate physical strength. He might surprise us, and himself.>>24987808That or just shivering.
>>24987804I don't doubt it will give him a bonus. probably a small one though, as it was supposed to take years to work.I REALLY REALLY hope cold works on zombies. Freezing does, but that might take too long, so I hope cold itself works.
So...I'm seeing the tide drift to Cold+Haste. Is that it, or am I calling a vote?
Ssen should prepare a witty quip for when Mage escapes her mother's coils
Well, we could take this outside so more elves could see this. We know that zapping brililite will cause some anti magic so if Mage zaps the Brililite that dispelled the illusion hiding the door to the Fey Court, it can and will weaken the necromantic bonds on Ssen's mom.
>>24987855Haste seems like something best used only in desperation, given the risk, but yeah, cold with haste as a backup.
>>24987855It's mostly to cold. Haste is a maybe, assuming it's not the stupidest idea on the planet. Mage would know on that point.Flesh shaping seems a bit too much like cheating, an elf could call us out.
>>24987855If you think you see where the general consensus is leading, go ahead and make a call and write something awesome; you don't have to make it an explicit vote every time if you've already seen convincing arguments you like.
>>24987913 Yeah, I know, but there's been issues and drama before, so now I make sure. >>24987800"To think that Dagda would get such a cold reception. I'm sure he will overcome this challenge with great haste." You say.Mage nods. "Come lamia. I am not afraid, I will show you what I am made of."The table is cleared and Mage steps up onto it. Ssuah gets onto the table and coils around him.<I am going to try and kill you.> She says calmly. <I have no choice, also, they promise me that I will not have to go back to It.>"Ssen? I didn't get all of that." Mage says. "But I'm thinking that it was pretty bad...are you okay with me going as far as I can, cause this might go ugly and..." He shrugs. "I mean she's still your mother."
>>24988046"She is my mother yes but her current life is unnatural and I would see her returned to the embrace of the earth where she belongs"
>>24988046Thanks you, but she's already dead. The only thing we can truly do for her now is free her soul to start it journey to his light.
>>24988046"And she's suffering. Do what you must."<Sorry, Mother. I'll at least make sure you find the warm sun eventually... along with the rest of our kind enslaved and slaughtered by the Whisper. At all costs.>
>>24988046It's fine mage. You do as you must.
>>24988046She's already dead, Lord. Don't hold back on my account.
>>24988046"She is already dead. Do what you must, if it comes to that. The dead should be allowed to rest in peace."
>>24988046Well, it's only fair he fight back if she fights as hard as she can."Go ahead. she's only visiting, anyway."feel free to disregard this, we only really need one sage words.
>>24988046"Do what you must, my Lord. I can be sad whenever is most appropriate."
>>24988164>"Go ahead. she's only visiting, anyway."Nicely said.
>>24988046Another alternative: "You would not be the first, and I forgave him for it as well."
>>24988207That's actually rather poignant. You have my vote.
Rolled 1"She is already dead. Do what you must, if it comes to that. The dead should be allowed to rest in peace. You...you would not be the first, and I forgave him as well."<Sorry, Mother. I'll at least make sure you find the warm sun eventually... along with the rest of our kind enslaved and slaughtered by the Whisper. At all costs.>Mage takes a deep breath and nods. Ssuah coils around him, and starts to squeeze. Mage starts to chant and you can see the magic light come from the tip of his staff.
>>24988362I hope that's a 1 for her, and not us.
>>24988376As do we all.
>>24988362yeesh, thats a horrid roll.
>>24988362>Rolls a 1.IT BEGINS!!!!
>>24988362Well, whatever that does might end up getting him out of her coils, just not the way he intended. Hopefully in one piece and not many.
Rolled 14Mage grunts and sweats, you can tell he's using his staff as a way to keep your mother from completely crushing him, as he's holding it at an angle rather than straight up and down. How long is that spell going to take?So far, thankfully, you aren't sure if it's the reanimation process, Mage's spell, or Ssauh just not wanting to do it deep down...Mage is holding his own.The light grows brighter and Ssuah squeezes tighter.
>>24988435Well, if that last roll was good, this one is bad!
>>24988362... this either is a very good thing or a very bad thing.
>>24988450Depends, that one might have been Ssuah, and this one might have been Mage. We'll find out; nothing Ssen can do about it one way or another.
>>24988462Ssen can CHEERLEADOr tell a precisely timed joke to ruin mom's concentration.
>>24988435Well, if that was Mage's spell, it was definitely a hit.
Rolled 2>>24988435"GAHHH!" Mage screams in pain as Ssuah squeezes tighter and tighter, you heard a familiar crack. That's a cracked rib right there. Not fatal, but...not good either. Hopefully the other two tests wont be as strenuous, or won't be something he has to do in person. The light is growing brighter. He's about half way there.Ssuah squeezes more. Mage continues to focus despite the pain. You want to look away, oh by the Light...was that the look on ALL of your victim's faces?
>>24988483Oh, I see. This is rolling up to a target number, isn't it?
>>24988483I thin high rolls are bad on this one, given how that last one hurt mage.Therefore, this is good!
>>24988483Wow mage is really gonna die, isnt he?
>>24988483This mite be good
>>24988492or it is a set number of rounds, and these rolls are Ssuah's attempts to kill Mage.I am thinking its the later, as he was fine on the 1, and got hurt on the 14.
Rolled 2>>24988483Mage regroups. Oh, that book from Uncle Julian! You can see him gesturing to Mage, on how to twist his body and how to bend certain parts of his limbs to go with the compression to minimize the damage. You think back to all those time that Father or Uncle Julian asked you to give them a 'tight' hug when you were little and how they'd try to wiggle out of it. You just thought it was a game.Now it's saving Mage's life.He's almost there, but Mother gives one last hard squeeze.
oh god this is nerve wracking. (and bone breaking)>>24988492probably. He has a certain number of turns to reach a target or he dies and we aren't moving fast enough damnit.
well, mage has like 5 wounds.I have no idea how many wounds a lamia constrict does, we tend to 1 or 2 shot people. We've never constricted a boss though.
>>24988509Yeah, looks that way.
>>24988510hah, all these 2s.
>>24988510fuck, mage, you might die.How do we save mage if this goes foul? We might need a plan b.
>>24988510Mage you're a champ.
He takes a troll potion right after this paticular test.
>>24988536low is good here.
we COULD be building up for a target number.or we COULD be seeing if mage can survive X number of turns, where X is how long the spell takes.
>>24988573Knowing would be nice hah.
>>24988573>Tfw the spell doesnt work at all, or is discounted due to magic.
>>24988573current pattern indicates low is good.Unless echo decides to be a dick
>>24988591nah, the words saaid nothing about how he was to free himself.
>>24988603Its a test of strength, unless you REALLY stretch the wording of that, magic usually does not equal muscle.
we should perhaaaaps move in at some point.And then I guess kill all the elves.
There's a flash of light and Mage fires off two spells at once. He didn't QUITE get your hint. Oh he got that he should use the freeze spell and the haste spell...it's just he thought he should use both of them on HER instead of using the haste on him.It's actually a rather clever, if horrific, application. The freeze spell causes the tissue within a person to slow down or even freeze causing some damage. Then the instant application of the haste spell causes the same parts of the body, lungs, brain, certain muscles, etc, to rapidly expand in order to work harder and faster.Basic science. What happens when an object at lower temperatures is forced to rapidly expand?Mage would later call this spell 'Rupture'. He considers it one of his most horrible creations.You mother stops moving and just goes limp. Black goo drips out from her mouth, ears, nose and eyes. She's gone. Her insides pulped into mush.Mage steps out of her coils and gently steps down the table, holding his side. He looks at you with a combination of shock, horror, and relief."He used magic!" Comedy says. "That's totally-""Fair." Mab says. "My Dagda was an astonishing magic user, he is free of the coils of the lamia. Is there any who doubt the strength of this man? Who among here can equal such a feat?"The elves that are there say nothing."Those who say that this one has the strength of Dagda the Wise?" Mab says."AYE!" Everyone says."Good...now...it is late and we must retire." Mab puts a hand to Mage's chest he winces gingerly. "As tradition...we will spend the night together...a CHASTE night...for was that not how we were on the night before Our First Wedding?""Mommy!" Comedy shouts."YOU, young lady, shall spend the night in your room...such as you did during our SECOND Wedding when he returned to me before."Comedy glares at you as she walks by you. "This isn't over Paladin. I promise you, there's going to be an extra corpse going to the mountain."
>>24988692No we are not murdering the elves. We need Citadel to not have them. We also require info on where exactly the monster army is so we can purify it.
>>24988729Shush comedy for a moment.Go and say goodbye to mom. We didn't last time. This is important.
>>24988729So you mean you're going to be beheaded. Thanks Comedy. You're a pal.
>>24988729by his light mage... you are terrifying.I think we have someone who can top our venoms for horrifying ways to die.
>>24988729OK. Next time we need to drop a hint, fuck subtlety.
>>24988729Thankfully Mab is on our side completely, and is about to probably teach mage the old tongue or whatever it is.
>>24988758now now, this one is fast.It's painful, but fast. Ours are slow.
>>24988729"It worked. I'm sorry she had to go like that but it worked. My Lord might i entreat you to take a healing potion? I know the sound of a breaking rub when I hear one."
>>24988729>Comedy glares at you as she walks by you. "This isn't over Paladin. I promise you, there's going to be an extra corpse going to the mountain.""Two, actually, but we'll make our Peace with the second one later."
rub = rib
>>24988729"Shut your Light-damned mouth."And see that what's left of our Mother receives proper attention. Because it's the least we can do.
>>24988794yes. Shut comedy up. Attend to mother.Do we know any last rites?
>>24988794time to bury her again. With full cermony.
>>24988729>Comedy glares at you as she walks by you. "This isn't over Paladin. I promise you, there's going to be an extra corpse going to the mountain.""No, not a whole corpse, just your head. I made a promise about the head, but I'm not lugging your fat Thistlebottom the whole way there."(We *are* taking her head to a mountain, after all---Old One's mountain.)
>>24988754>>24988794Agreed on proper treatment of the dead. I don't think we should say anything to Comedy, because fuck that bitch. We'll get our shot at her eventually, and we have more important things to be doing with our time.
>>24988834We've been snarking at her this entire dinner; why should we stop now?But I definitely agree that we should take the opportunity to do now what we never could before. Last rites, and whatever a non-Citadel lamia would traditionally prefer done with the body.
>>24988865we don't know what non-citadel lamias traditionally do with a body.Other than let it go into the ocean, if they live on the ocean. But we don't have time for a viking funeral.
This time, go to the light.
You look at Comedy. "Two, actually...sorta. I made a promise regarding Tragedy and your heads." You snarl. "Now shut your mouth before it spews any more Myriad Darkness or filth."You look at Mage."Sorry." He says.You shake your head. "It worked. I'm sorry she had to go like that but it worked. My Lord might i entreat you to take a healing potion? I know the sound of a breaking rib when I hear one.""I will tend to his wounds." Mab says. "He will be safe with me. I promise." She looks at you. Honestly, this is such a stupid farce. Mab has the power, and thanks to Comedy going off the deep end, they're willing to go so far as to go along with this plan, when all they need to do is pump Comedy full of arrows. Solve a LOT of problems.But then they wouldn't be Elves of the Fey Court, you suppose. Either way, this isn't bad. Julian, since he is your 'uncle' is put into your care. Sadly, that means that Tricia, Peri, and Lea are still stuck with their 'loved ones.'"Take these servants to their separate quarters, as tradition...and ensure that NO ONE. Not even her highness the Princess disturbs them." She looks at you and Julian. Julian still has trouble walking, he's away from Death's door, but he can still see it.Then Mab looks at the dead corpse on the table, she looks back to you. "When you're ready, Paladins, you may ask to be shown to your room.""Come, Lea. We have meditation to do.""Yes, Father.""Auntie, please shut UP about the pupae! I KNOW about the pupae...and NO. I DON'T WANT WINGS!""Come on kid. Let me at least say something to her.""No. You sleep on the floor.""Kid, don't test me.""Test me and you don't get a pillow."The guards take the Dawnchasers away and Mab and Mage go off together, with Mab's hairmaidens carrying the mass of Mab's hair along. You and Julian are alone in the hall, with your Mother's corpse.Julian puts a hand on your shoulder. "I'm sorry."
>>24988865Because our mom just died... AGAIN. Now is not a time for snarking. Now is a time for giving Comedy a Paladin Glare so fucking hard she sees premonitions of her own brutal death locked in our coils, struggling to free herself as her every breath causes our body to tighten around her lungs until there's nothing left of her but a slurry of blood and bones held together loosely by a sack of skin. Like chunky elf peanut-butter in a tube.She will know of her fate, and she will have time to think about all the things she's done to deserve it.
>>24988952"I'm happy to have gotten to speak with her. "Lets take her to be buried. Or maybe cremated. Whichever is easiest \ most correct.
>>24988952Come on Uncle Julian, we still got the last rites and the funeral to do.
>>24988952"Me too."And then a poignant pause, before we say whatever else. Whatever else might be, in this case,"At least she'll go to the light this time. I'll make sure of that." Then let's proceed with the last rites. And then after we do the last rites we proceed with destroying citadel.
>also three trials, three zombies. Damn Comedy is going to have mage kill them all in these bedamned trials.
>>24988952It's okay. I never really knew her. She was a monster, and I'm glad that Father found me... but she never deserved this. To be resurrected and a dance like a puppet. At least I got to talk, and to say goodbye.
>>24988952"I mourned her long ago, when Father first told me. At least she had her own mind free of the whispering, however briefly, and she can go to the Light now instead of a random cobblestone. I hope 'Dagda' can forgive himself, though. But at least I had a chance to speak with her, and we can give her the funeral she never had before."I'm also starting to get the idea of why Citadel is going to collapse, literally, when we take down its eponymous spirit: all the cobblestones
>>24989060yup, even if we free the Heart instead of destroying it those souls will still have to be freed. Which means the city will still collapse.
>>24989040Like I said before. Comedy is going to die, and she is going to die badly. Not out of hate, but because there is literally no brutality we could visit on her that would suffice.
>>24989074well, it might not COLLAPSE collapse. It will just stop being maintained indefinately by souls.Which means the bricks will need to be replaced after wear.Which nobody does in citadel.
>>24989060Dunno where the end of that sentence went, but I guess the meaning was clear enough anyway.
>>24989078that sounds kind of like out of hate to me.
>>24989094yup, definately a bit of hatred there. I prefer a nice quick death. Less chance for her to wiggle out of her much deserved reward.
>>24989040I'm oddly unbothered by that for the other two, if it comes to that. They're all dead already, and Ssuah is the only one who didn't really deserve it.
>>24988952>I KNOW about hte pupae... and NO. I DON'T WANT WINGS!come on tricia.wings. wiiiings. wiiiiiiings. We'll do a bellydance if you do the wings.
>>24989144you convinced me. I don't think Tricia is that easy though.
we might be unbothered but Lea probably will be. Even if he is a controlling jerk hes still her father.
damnit google, tell me what some last rites are, don't just tell me they're from the book anointing stick. I needs me some inspiration!
>>24989094She's gone out of her way to visit suffering on others. She's cruel, sadistic, and remorseless. Putting her on the receiving end for once isn't hatred, it's balance.
>>24989192no, that's pretty much hate's MO. I don't mind giving her a bad death, but I remind you: We're giving her head to a dragon. He fully intends to cast foul necromancies on them to make them suffer forever and ever.We could perhaps give them a quick death, for expedience sake.
"Me too." You say."I'm happy to have gotten to speak with her. But she didn't deserve this." You say. "At least she'll go to the Light this time. I'll make sure of that." You say. "I hope 'Dagda' can forgive himself, though. But at least I had a chance to speak with her, and we can give her the funeral she never had before.""They aren't going to let us bury her." Julian says. "Are you?"The Fey Court guard shakes his head. "It's rotting necrotic flesh that's filled with toxins...she goes to the fire.""Give us a moment." Julian says. He goes up to the Lamia and places his hand upon her forehead. "May His Light look upon this soul and take her on her Journey. I take upon the burden of her sins, the weight of her grief, and the ache of her sorrows, so that she may find her way to you and Enlightenment and not be lost.Ssuah of Bright Tower, Ruin Forest. Child of the Light...blessed be your Journey. May we all meet once more, at the Last Sunset...and may we see you again for the Second Dawn."Amen."
>>24989185"Riposa in il Caldo"
>>24989223Cremation seems more fitting, anyway. She did speak of being cold, which makes a burial seem inappropriate.
"Rest in Peace Mother. If your soul once again goes to that place I will free you."To the gaurds:"Careful of the smoke theres a lot more then just one toxin in her."
>>24989223"Amen." Kiss her cheek, mind the gross black stuff, and then call for an attendant to take us to our rooms.My god is this going to hit us later. Or now. I bet when we get to the room.
>>24989264She said her fangs were empty. No lamia venom there.
>>24989254Plus you can't make a zombie out of ashes.
>>24989280how naive.>>24989282Donovan was ashes. I think all you need is the soul. The body can be remade.
>>24989280>>24989289it doesn't matter if there's no venom in there, she still has the ability to make the venom and all the parts to make the venom all kept in sacks very close to one another.Just... don't breathe the corpse smoke. Not a hard request.
In fact thats how I bet Trivalion (I think that was his name) was going to be revived. They take him outta whatever brick he inhabits and make a body for him. I bet Comedy just made these bodies mostly dead to drive in the fact that they WERE dead. What a cruel woman.
>>24989289Wait, if Donovan was rebuilt from nothing, why did he still have wounds like the missing arm?
Well, time to rest for the night with julian. He gets the bed. Torturees earned it.We'll just be over here in a pile. Crying or punning. depending on our stage of grief.
>>24989223>Ssuah of Bright Tower, Ruin Forest. Child of the Light...blessed be your Journey. May we all meet once more, at the Last Sunset...and may we see you again for the Second Dawn.That really makes Dawnchaser sound a lot more morbid. And apocalyptic.
>>24989406Dawn chasers are extremely apocalyptic. At least one apocalypse.
>>24989406Consider we ARE pretty much bringing about an apocalypse....
Well, let's go just sleep off all this emotional trauma and torture. Get a good 8 hours in.
>>24989461First time in a long time we won't have Tricia around when doing so, and by the Light could we use someone to cuddle with right now.
>>24989513I don't think julian would appreciate that.
>>24989521That was rather my point, yes.
"Rest in Peace Mother. If your soul once again goes to that place I will free you." You say. You kiss her on the forehead.You nod at the elves who are waiting. "Careful of the smoke theres a lot more then just one toxin in her."They nod and take her away. Another guard leads you away, Julian leans on you to walk. The room you're given resembles a Traveller's Tavern room. Half-decent bed, chamber pot, small basin of clean water. Jullian staggers to the bed. He looks at it, and you nod. He collapses upon it and goes to sleep.You coil yourself up in a corner. Okay...you have time now, and if you put it off any longer you'll forget about it, and that's what makes mer REALLY crazy...or grows white scales.Your mother loved you, died in pain, existed in hell, and now she's gone again, most likely back to that nightmarish existence that Robin, Ryan, and Jessi...along with countless others now share. You're glad you have no legs, because your pretty sure you wouldn't be able to stand at this point.Eventually you exhaust yourself of tears, and you fade to sleep. And even that is no relief. The thing of Shadows and Sparks is there...and now you know what those countless sparks are.
>>24989529well, we could always ask for an elf to come take one for the team so we can sleep well. But I doubt they'd go for it, or that it would help. We might just have to be cold for a night. Maybe extra blankets.
>>24989543It's not warmth we're looking for. It's comfort, and there's only one person for that.
>>24989533>citadel is there too!Fkoff citadel, get out of my dreams. I want the grass-hunting dream again, that one was nice.
>>24988952Totally should have killed Lea's dad. Save her the agony of him being around.Gags for those three might be a necessity, even if Auntie requires full body gag (or we get Trish to spend the night with us)
>>24989533Oh Citadel. Will you give those up if you are freed? Or will it take your death?
>>24989583I think "free citadel' was a euphamism for stabbing the main creature to death so the sparks can run free.
>>24989533That's not a happy thought.You know, I was kinda in the camp of killing Comedy horrifically, but the Dramatae are beyond that. Send them on the Journey with all due haste, and let the Light sort it out.
>>24989623nah killing Citadel will free those sparks too. But Citadel is a bound monster just like all the citadel corrupt Comedy has gathered., so it might be something to free it from the spells Peace has it under.
>>24989623if it wasn't then, it is now.So what if a lot of people will die, better death than that.
>>24989696see you friday!Also poor Ssen. So much trauma. Poor julian. so much torture. Poor lea, so much discipline. Poor tricia, so many WIIIINGS. Poor comedy, gonna die badly.
Okay, night.Next thread:MAYBE: Friday, May 24, 7:30-9pm PST.WILL BE: Saturday, May 25 3-5pm PST
>>24989730Night Echo, see you then.
So. we've thoroughly beaten comedy today. but can we keep it up? Comedy did a REALLY good job of making this unpleasant for Ssen, even though we were able to bravado our way through it.
I'm kinda worried how Lea and Tricia will take the re-death (hah) of their family. Tricia might not be as close to her aunt as Lea is her dad. But family is family. We barely knew our mother after all.And then there are the actual challenges. The next one should be doable... however the one Comedy is picking has me worried. She is gonna stack the deck as much as possible.... I wonder if we can get Tricia to eat her aunt's ants.
>>24989797no, we will not make tricia eat her aunt's ants. We'll just set them on fire. Or stab her black heart, something she still has, given our anatomy lessons with tricia.I sort of hope Tricia's aunt drives the knowledge of how to get wings into her by constant chattering tonight. I also hope it's just meditation with lea's dad, less of the verbal abuse.
>>24989837killing her is out of the question. Sabotoging her weapon is something we should consider as Comedy will definately cheat.
>>24989871I dunno, I was sort of assuming all the zombies would be dead by the time this was done.Too bad we don't have tricia here tonight, we could taunt her about that planting bugs thing her aunt said. Also, thanks mummy for the scales beauty tip. We'll keep eating things nice and bloody rare.
>>24989897these zombies ARE the trials. Comedy has set this up for Mage to fight our loved ones. Getting rid of Tricia's Aunt's Ants is a good way to hamstring a trial, or at least weaken it. (These zombies were probably meant for Ssen actually, these guys are all physical fighters, not magical.)
>>24989939maybe Ssen will have to champion a fight.But if ALL the trials are zombies, I am going to, once again, take comedy apart for lack of creativity.
>>24989730Good night, Echo, master of the gutpunch.