what's the problem? that's the DM's job

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>Pathfinder
>Playing a bare-fisted barbarian
>Only other melee fighter is an eidolon with lots of natural attacks
>DM decides fuck you guys
>Volcano explodes (with a dwarven city inside, but details, details)
>Awful little rock/magma elementals running around
>Throw chucks of rock/lava that explode on impact, only need a touch attack to hit, and give everyone hit a chance to immolate
>Every time they're hit with a natural attack, some damage, and a chance to immolate
>my fucking face when we level up in the midst of this and I get DR 1.

>>24641178
No, it's fucking not the DM's job to fuck with the party like a passive-aggressive douchebag cocklesuck.

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>>24641178

Rolled 82

>>24641178
The DM's job is not to make every choice of the players the wrong one.

This wasn't even choices in game that he is punishing for, this is punishing for basic character creation. (Rogues and Illusionists are charaters you can expect in a game.)

The DM should not try to ruin the fun by making every PC worthless.

As a DM I occasionally have players who are relying to much on one skill/spell fight an enemy who that skill/spell doesn't effect, but I only do this if I feel the player needs to explore other abilities, that being said I consider it poor taste to make an encounter where someone is totally useless, that just takes the fun of playing away and my motto as a DM has always been 'it's my job to make it fun for the players.'
That being said sucks that your DM doesn't let you use any of your classes special powers man.

>>24641188
>3.5
>Be a monk in a non-optimized group
>DM starts to use Azer, Fire elementals and other crazy shit creatures that are made of fucking fire and damage you if you touch them unarmed.
>Looks at me and smirks

>>24641108
First thing is not a problem.
Second thing is douchebaggery.

A better alternative is to play up both, and make it so characters have to use complementary skills to overcome these challenges and wreck shit through creativity.

>>24641249
>put on leather gloves
>dip hands in liquid nitrogen
>punch

>>24641235
Some classes can't rely in more than one gimmick

>>24641108
>Cersei = DM
>Tyrion = You
>Tywin = Your mom

>>24641249
I would just straight up quit if a DM would do that. And key his car.

Seriously do people just take this shit with a smile?

>be the DM
>stock ancient necropolis dungeon with a variety of undead
>find out the halfling rogue has neglected to take any of the options that let him get sneak attack on undead, AGAIN
>despite being gimped by that in the last four games he's played in, and the rest of the group having explained to him every one of those options complete with relevant books and page numers.
>feel pity, drop a +3 short sword sized for a small character and a Greater True Death augment crystal in like the third room of the dungeon
>he pockets them, never uses them, clears the dungeon, and complains how he was useless with all the undead.

I am going to strangle this mother fucker.

>>24641483
Just do it, no one will miss him and his parents will throw you a party

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I had a player who was pretty good at avoiding DM hate, one campaign however he tries to test me.

I have this method of railroading the game I use sometimes, I basically hint very strongly that a meteor
MAY hit the area they want to go to, but the path I've laid out feels very meteorless. I know it's childish and stupid,
but my group is childish and stupid, so they need to be
shoved in the right direction some times.

So this player, he's a real min-maxer, and we are playing pathfinder with a few 3.5 books thrown in to open up a
few other class options. The player manages to make a character is 3 times per day can deflect a projectile as a
free action. So when the time comes he dares me to throw a meteor at him, so I do (I don't BS when it comes
to DM threats) and he legit flings it back into space. I accept this as it was a pretty clever use of talents and
character abilities.

The next time he tries this it goes a little differently
>Oh you don't want to go over there, feels very 'meteorish'
>"nah, I'm going over there"
>okay, you look in the sky and see not 1, but 2 meteors falling towards you
>"S'all right, I still have two free projectile deflects today"
>But wait! It seems one meteor is attacked to the other with a stick of some king...
>"...so?"
>OMG! One of the meteors is WIELDING the other!
>"...still lost as to how this matters"
>It's no longer two meteor projectiles coming in! It's now one meteor attempting a melee attack against you with another meteor!
> :|

Players Face when he realized it was his PCs last day.

>>24641612
Using such a random bullshit thing as meteors to railroad is a lazy, shameful thing to do. That's almost as bad as having an anvil drop on a character's head every time they critically fail to shoot someone.

>>24641612
That is by far both the most hilarious thought and most dick move you could have pulled.
I would have laughed if it was my character, but I tend not to make gigantic dick-people and challenge the DM.

>>24641612
You are everything wrong with the world. If you weren't so lazy and unimaginative, you wouldn't need to railroad so hard.

>>24641746
For what it's worth it was not terrible against the setting of the campaign. I was using a world plagued by natural disasters. Floods, volcanoes, plagues, earthquakes, etc. The whole idea was that it was a plane of existence that had really pissed off the gods in some way, and the PCs were attempting to find out why and fix it.

>>24641772

No, it's still lazy and bullshit.

>>24641178
no it's not. it is not realistic or sensible for every foe to be tailored against the party.

>>24641612
you, i like you

>>24641108

Can I say something, though?

It seems that the 'final bosses' of high-level campaigns are always undead or demons. Like, the Age of Worms adventure path: ALL UNDEAD, ALL THE TIME.

You literally fought Undead and the occasional demon from 'Return to the Whispering Cairn' onwards. I have no idea what Clerics and/or Rogues were supposed to do in that campaign.

And I think Savage Tide was entirely about demons.

>>24641178

The DM's job most certainly isn't to play against the party. Unless it's very specifically clear to all paties involved that the DM/Player relationship will be adversarial, it's just a massive dick move.

>>24641612

Go and enroll for astrology 101 and come back later fagget.

>>24641890

Either you're playing a bad system or your DM lacks imagination.

>>24641612
You're a bad GM and you should feel bad.

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>>24641612
Sounds like agony playing with you. Follow the yellow brick road, that's where all the special snowflakes I made are.

>>24641927
Are.. are you making the assumption that real-life physics are the same as in a fantasy game?
I'd like to clarify that point before opening my folder of sarcastic reaction images.

>>24641612
That's a dick move, but it's an entertaining dick move.

>>24641249
This is why you carry a backup weapon, Quarterstaff, Nunchuks, Sai, whatever!

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>>24642047

>using 'durrhurr magic' instead of at least attempting to use logic in your campaigns

High fantasy where random shit happens because magic is boring as fuck.

>>24641890
Clerics? Did you something else?

>>24642047
>astrology
>anything to do with real world physics

>>24642117
> astrology
> Anything to do with reality

>>24641612
A meteor isnt a creature so it cant "Wield"
You are wrong both morally and objectively

>>24641612
You do know that "meteor" is synonymous with "shooting star" and refers to the trail of light, not the actual projectile?

>>24642077

If you wanna play a character who punches shit to death you should be able to play a character that punches shit to death without some asshole of a DM dicking you over.

>>24642137
Why don't you have meteor elementals in your campaign?

>>24642159
Meteor isn't an element. Granted, there could be meteor golems.

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>>24641612

>It's no longer two meteor projectiles coming in! It's now one meteor attempting a melee attack against you with another meteor!

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>>24641108
>>Tailor-mades every encounter according with players weaknesses

I generally like this, but there's a fine line between a smart encounter which you can't just rape to death and when every battle becomes a fight for survival because DM keeps using meta knowledge about your characters for completely out of place enemies and situations.

>>24642173
>regular /tg/ threads with elemental plane of breakfast
>meteor elementals are not acceptable

>>24642159
>>24642173
They could of been para-elemental meteors
But that was not the situation posted

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>>24641612

>>24641612
I bet you didn't even roll initiative.

>>24641108
>Tailor-mades every encounter according with players weaknesses
This is fucking douchebaggery on an epic scale.
> Hey DM I want to play a character who can do x
> THEN YOU WILL ONLY FIGHT STUFF THAT IS IMMUNE TO X!!!! EAT THIS FAGGOT! DID YOU REALLY THINK I WAS LETTING YOU HAVE FUN???

>>24642197
Well that was an entire elemental plane of breakfast. That anon has yet to say if his setting has an elemental plane of meteor/s or an elemental plane of space rocks yet.

>>24642192
>transcript error

fuck

>>24641317
I want to punch Cersei in her face every time she smiles or says anything. I cannot describe how much I hate her character. Either the actor is very good or she just has a very hate-able face.

>>24642155
If the GM has every encounter somehow prevent you from using your specialization, sure, it's bullshit.

But the situation described doesn't even prevent you from punching things to death, it just makes it an unappealing choice. If the majority of the monsters he set against you hurt you if you unarmed attack it though, you'd have every right to complain.

>>24642117
>>24642124

Astronomy, a simple typo mistake guys.....

But seriously that guys story is just random retardness,
lol i send your meteor,

Yeah how about...meteor who uses melee atack lol whoo
owned bitch.

>>24642370
>It makes punching things to death unappealing
>for a monk
>A monk who's only ability is to punch things to death. And he's not very good at that.

So, given that the only choice he can make is bad, he's supposed to, what, spend the encounter holding his dick?

>>24642370

The DM deliberately did just that in this case. If you take somebody's character concept and actively punish them for playing said character just because, it's assholery no matter how you slice it.

>>24642100
You mean D&D? Everyone always disregards the practical use of certain spells like Create Food and Water.

>>24642330
You know the hate fucking would be out of this world.

>>24641108
I love my DM, all our encounters are designed to play to our strengths. Our party has three thevies, an assassin and a cleric and suddenly it's solitary guards, shadows and undead everywhere.

And then one guard makes his escape and suddenly every torch in the fortress springs to life and now a platoon are braying at our heels.

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>>24642330
Can't be her face. Lena Heady is adorable.

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>>24641612
my meteor sense is tingling

>>24642192
For a final boss battle, after the BBEG has watched your progress and calculated it all. Fuck yes tailor make it
>>24642464
Last game i played in, 2 character got rings of sustenance as fast as they could. I facepalmed loud enough for our characters to hear

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As a DM, I have an agreement with my players.

I will try my hardest to kill them with level-appropriate encounters. In exchange, I do not know the full extent of their power beyond what they do in-game. I need to estimate their classes, abilities, and sometimes even races, if they play somebody always encased in armor. I must think like the BBEG, using only what the BBEG would know about them to fight them. All 3.5e books are allowed in my campaigns, so that's not easy.

But it works. And my players love it, so that's all that matters.

>>24642674
sounds good as long as your players aren't disgusting cheatyfaces

>>24642574
she looks like a dude i'm not complaining or anything

>>24642674
You're lucky, a lot of DMs aren't able to trust their players to not kill every NPC they meet. Let alone have free reign on their characters

>>24642674
That actually sounds like a fun way to play, as long as you can all trust each other.

>>24642515
I've got to say, the one time I did get a DM that played things like this, it was amazing.
Basically, as long as things were going according to plan, the encounters would be pretty easy. If we fucked the plan up, suddenly everything was hard and we were heading on a 300mph collision course with death.

Having downtime between the hard encounters really makes you appreciate the big battles more.
And also, the rush of a perfectly executed plan is always great.

>>24642574
Yeah, it's the face. I have to admit it's a great match for the character.

>>24642707
>>24642747
>>24642753

They know not to cheat. I'll find out eventually.

That's when the legion of winged hellfire engines appears.

>>24641188
DR is automatically overcome by energy. So the fire damage still hurts you.

I had a group that I played with back when I came home from college, who incorporated perpetual misunderstanding of rules. That is, they fuck up reading the rule, have played with it, and refused to listen to me when I tell them their rules are wrong. Their misinterpreted rules become house rules.

Example: Keen and Improved Critical stack.

So they'd perpetually have to fuck with the encounter level and ramp up the enemies of the players because of the broken-ass rules which allowed enormous exploits. One of my buddies was very adept at min-maxing, and would routinely roll ungodly amounts of damage. And because they refused to fix the flaws (relearning the game), they would have to cheat the shit out of it.

They had a habit of declaring perfectly good rules to be null and void. For instance, when I came home to do a guest-DM spot, I wasn't informed that they had unanimously determined that Death magic/save-or-die spells were "unfair". Because nobody ever thought to play a caster with death ward. Damn near had a revolt when one of the PC's lost a roll..

They'd essentially play one game style, arbitrarily determining that other rules are not good to play in, and then consequently have to BUFF the EVER LOVING HELL out of their enemies in order to be competitive. The normal DM would routinely overpower the BBEGs to account for my one buddy mentioned above, which necessitated the entirety of the group of do their damnedest to min-max, which necessitated yet another massive overpowering of the BBEGs with rules-breaking decisions, etc.

It was an ugly spiral.

>>24642843
Save or die spells _are_ unfair and banning them is a good idea.

>>24642869
Yeah, but in games where death is a revolving door, it isn't that big a problem.

>one of my first 2nd Edition AD&D campaigns as a player
>DM made every single fucking shop-keeper always just say "the last enchanted weapon was just sold, I'm out of them, lol" or something along those lines
>never found a goddamn one either
>only 1 wizard in a 4 players party
>shit that can't be damaged by normal weapons is found at last, and many of them at that, we escape every time, EVERY time
>time passes, finally starting to find/buy +1 weapons
>enemies now are damaged only by +2 weapons or higher
Fuck that guy.

>>24641108

Casters break the game causally. The first one isn't a problem at all.

>>24642869

And we'll ban wizards from using fly spells and a druid from using wild shape/natural spell against a party of melee characters.

So we should make it a cakewalk for players?

>>24642879

Games like that are retarded. Fuck raise dead/resurrection.

>>24642869
Stat reducing spells are unfair, too. Man, Ray of Enfeeblement is hella OP. Better nerf it because my fighter will be inconvenienced with it.

>>24642869
Is it THAT hard to get something that Resurrects?

>>24642781
you crazy bro.

>playing pathfinder official campaign
>never come across magic weapons for first 3 books
>ever boss/subboss/important anything is a wizard
>books out the ass
>party wizard is broken sooner than normal
I know 3.x writers have this perpetual fear magic will be outshined by AC/physical damage/skills, but can they hide it a little better?

>>24642574
It must be the hair. The Cersei wig transforms her from a normal human being to a sadistic monster.

>>24642905
Hey, I agree. But if the dead can be brought back by magic, there should be no problem just killing someone with magic.

>>24642905

Agreed. Except for RunQuest, where resurrection involves the priest of the healing goddess literally chasing down the soul of the departed through the Underworld before it can pass through Death's door. That shit's metal, yo.

>>24642988

The strange thing is that Cersei is one of the less objectionable characters, morally speaking. Lena Heady just does such a great job portraying her as a horrible prick that you can't help but hate her with a passion.

>>24642952
At least in 3.5, Death spells and its ilk can be res'd from.

>>24643031
can't*

>>24643019
She's a woman, so it's horrible cunt, not horrible prick.

>>24642897

>Implying save or dies are the same thing

Eat a few dicks, seems to be what you want to do.

>>24641108
You do know that undead are NOT immune to non-mind affecting spells, right? For example Minor Image. They also have crappy Will saves.

>>24643096
a wizard with fly vs. a fighter essentially is

>>24643050
> implying cunt or prick are gendered insults
Knob off, you prat.

>>24642197
You will find that /tg/ is almost always completely full of shit.

>>24643107
Constructs auto fail disbelief due to low INT as well.

The DM for my level 18-20 game would for a long while frequently make sure to have big fights or situations that completely jacks up our characters.

Now I don't mind a boss fight but these were happening often, and outside of the actual story path that we were supposed to be doing. He would effectively hook us with a plot hook then do everything in his power to make sure we never got to do it.

When my Gnome wizard was eventually run off (well okay that character deserved it) I knew there was only one way to get us on course. So I created a Cleric with Leadership, then made my follower the most DM abusable character ever. He was a level 10 rogue/level 8 Bard who I said had been saved/redeemed by the cleric at some point and had become a bit of a coward. I also talked the DM into allowing him a special ability called "By the Skin of his teeth" that would make it so that any time he would take a colossal amount of damage, he would just go to 1 HP and pass out for a while until DM fiat declared otherwise. Outside of this he was almost worthless in both build and equipment.

From then on, any time that we encountered a situation where the whole party would normally be toyed with by some super-being, instead only my follower was tormented while the party got on with important business. This proved to be entirely successful until the game died off a few months later.

Question for 3.5 gurus.

If you were to hide in some bushes a ways back from a well travelled road and use an illusion spell to hide your party (ie. add more bushes), would a passing column of soldiers (say 10,000) get to each make a will or perception roll to see you?

Bear in mind that they are not actively looking for you and none veer off the path.

>>24643203
depends on the DM

>>24643173
>He would effectively hook us with a plot hook then do everything in his power to make sure we never got to do it.
This...It's...WHAT?!

>>24643203

This depends on DM determination really. He might only have scouts make those checks, or do loge scare checks like a die roll per 500 guys walking past, since only so many of them would be in a position to see you in the first place.

>>24642884
Yeah, that's horseshit. A DM specifically making his critters undamaged besides from a tier or above, and then NEVER gives you that. Fuck that guy, indeed.

>>24643203
By RAW?
Yes.
That doesn't mean rolling 10000d20 wouldn't be stupid as shit.

>>24643203
Would probably have a dedicated look out ever 1000 men or so, so 10 checks in all is how I would do it

>>24641108
>3.5
>join ongoing campaign
>make stealthy character who has access to invisibility
>holy shit every NPC whether friendly or enemy has blindsight.
>later learn that dm hates thieves and stealthy characters

>>24643203

I might make a single roll, but have the chances of them finding you be a high difficulty, like a nat 20 or a nat 100 on a d%. Just on the off-chance that one guy is a sorcerer and doesn't know it and feels magic, or someone is familiar with the area, that sort of thing.

>>24643019
>Less objectionable
>Cersei

Hell no, man. Cersei is just about the only character that pretty much everyone can hate. She is a terrible human being, having people killed for tiny bullshit, and just generally being a cunt.

On topic, though, I have played with a DM that you should never play a female character with, unless you have rape fantasies. I had one character that was brutally gang raped by the town guard for dancing in an inn, due to her being a goddamn dancer. This was before I had even met the other members of the party.

>>24643281
I admit I got excited when running a campaign, and saw Unnatural Aura on wraiths. I hate animal companions

>>24643019
She really isn't. Granted the show doesn't do a very good job of telling her story, but still.

>>24643317

Who exactly has she killed? Also Tywin is a far bigger douchebag and everybofy likes him.

>>24643373
Tywin is in about the same place on the dick-o'meter, but he's actually competent, and has a clear set of goals and motivations. Cersei is a ball of violent derpery.

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>>24642137

What if the meteor is Lavos?

>>24643333
But did you put friendly wraith NPCs in the region's largest city just to get rid of them? This dude had the generic city guards casting legend lore to find shit out.

Legend lore being a 4th level spell for bards and a 6th level spell for wizards.

Bear in mind the party was level 4.

>>24643438
I did take away loot when I got sick of the munchkin habits. If you can't wait for me to finish the subboss introduction before you're rolling damage, you get no shinies

>>24641178
DM does this now and again.

As a dread necromancer, I am less usefull against constructs immune to my spells and abilities. (so I send my enhanced shock troopers against them)

Really the problem comes from fighting a liche, if we come within 100 feet of it, we get cone of cold in the face for 15d6, at lv 8. average damage is going to be around 45, and only recently did my caster get 49 hp.

He has slain two party members by surprising us with cones of cold as we come around a corner, unknowing of the lich.

Tis frustrating.

>>24643482
That's not unreasonable. If your players care so little for what the boss looks like or says that they immediately start rolling damage (initiative is understandable) I'd probably do that too.

>>24643373
I didn't say she killed anyone herself. I said had people killed. By all accounts it seems that she was behind Jon Arryn's poisoning, as well as Robert's (even if those were most likely orchestrated by Littlefinger or Varys, she still wanted it done). She ordered Ser Mandon Moore to kill Tyrion, she had Margaery imprisoned, and also attempted to have Bronn killed. She is a cold-hearted hypocrite that needs to be killed, not paraded through the streets naked.

>>24643511
Average of 15d6 is 52.5. I don't think your dm wants you winning those fights.

>>24643373
She shoved her best friend down a well while she was still a teenager, she sends people to the mad scientist for experimentation. She's a terrible person.

>>24641927
hey. faggot. dontcha mean astronomy?

I don't need my fuckin fortune read ya know.

>>24643552

>Cersei was behind Jon Arryn's poisoning

Hah! Nope.

>>24642674
haha

play a summoner, minor priest of whoever.

BBEG fight comes along, THIS ISN'T EVEN MY FINAL FORM WORM!

>>24643373

Tywin is a villain, Cersei is a douchebag.

I have to make sure to pack the Deflect Arrows Feat on whatever melee guy I use just to avoid death by archer in my first few levels. Yes I know I need a free hand, I have to one hand a sword just to live long enough to make it to the bad guy.

Things got better with quick draw so I could get close and draw my big weapons.

>>24643552
Good god, anon, those spoilers within spoilers. I think i'm looking at some sort of spoiler-warp, a black hole with which information will never be released.

>>24641178
The DM's job is to kill the party as fast as possible without making it look rigged.

>>24643618
Then who was?

>>24641612
I now have this image of a comic in which a baby meteor goes to earth for some fun, gets told to fuck off by the PC in question, goes hurtling past it's mummy and daddy meteors, to which the mother grabs a stick, shoves it up the arse of the father and hurtle themselves towards the PC, all the while with enraged faces on them screaming "you dare touch our son!?? Fucker, take this!"

>>24643672

Littlefinger had Lysa (who is crazy in love with him) poison Jon and send the letter to Catelyn.

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>>24642884
It's like the opposite of my group
>mfw the DM says roll 1d100 at character creation
>mfw he says everyone starts out with a random magic item because fuck 2ed we're all going to die anyways
>MFW +5 longsword for my elven fighter/wizard at level 1
>Paladin player gets +1 arrows

Favorite DM, mostly because he isn't omgsoserious like the other one and isn't out to constantly fuck the party over.

>Other DM is an ass
>No matter what there was some things we could never come across, like mounts that could fly.
>Wizard decides "Fuck you, I polimorph my horse into a gryphon."
>DM makes wizard roll a d100 or something, fucking gryphon comes out retarded.

>Homebrew
>Our party getting more and more powerful:
>Rock Dragon/Demon
>Avatar of Light (Medic)
>Wraith Brawler with 130+% chance of instant death
>Gypsy-hating warrior
>suddenly Anti-magic campaign
>Constructs
>Death-immune
>Demons
>Swarms
>Demon swarms

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Yes, the bard may have left to answer the call of nature buuuut he didn't make it too far. I, a skin-walker took over his role. Now I'm simply stalking the opportunity to infiltrate and divide the group to feed on them easier.

Oh the thrill of the hunt.

>>24643860
Fucking skinwalkers, still think my dog might be one since that thread.

>>24643860

Ignoring your post, I'm currently watching Psycho-Pass and really liking the Minority Report-esque vibe it's got.

>>24644486
holy fuck I've been trying to remember the name of that movie for months. thank you

>>24644698
>movie

>>24644731
I was thinking about the movie but couldnt rememeber the name

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>>24644731
Some people likely never knew Minority Report was a short story before they made a film based off of it

Clam down

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>>24644804
>>24644801
Sorry for intruding, I thought you called soiko poss a movie.

>>24642895
OP here.
The first is trully a problem because we can't deal with the shit he throws at us, every class he allows has a few gimmicks and then he hinders them.

At least if you're a good caster you can try another way.

>>24642674
You sound nice, hope no one betrays you.

>>24644804
I knew it was a short story, I just was reminiscing about the movie but couldn't remember the name

>>24643203
My actual DM does this shit.

>Rogue uses stealth
>In 1km around every enemy rolls: Spot, Listen, Smell, Sense Chakra, Sense Cosmos, Spider Sense, Eco Sonar...and stuff, until he rolls enought to spot the rogue.

He hates stealth, and bluff, and diplomacy

>>24645157
so your DM is metagaming?

>>24645157
and that's when you quit the game

>>24643685
>mother grabs a stick, shoves it up the arse of the father
ouch

>>24645876
have you ever been so mad that you shoved a stick up your spouse's ass?

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>>24645989

>>24641108
Done occasionally, this can be good; after all, once the party gets reasonably well known, their nemesises/nemeses are likely to get to know their weaknesses. Done constantly, it's moronic pointless metagaming.

>>24646019
Is this from a rebuild of Evangelion?

Are those things worth watching?

I watched the original series and it was pretty decent.

>>24646207

It's worth watching until Rebuild 3.0. Rebuild 3.0 is very.. well, let's just say it doesn't even bother trying to follow the events of the series anymore

>>24646242
What happens in there?

>>24646207
The rebuild of EVA series is pretty damn good. Shinji is, on the whole, a lot less whiny. The plot is at least somewhat coherent. The overall production quality is higher. etc.

Also, although the first movie (You are [NOT] Alone) is roughly identical to the first couple of the original series, as the ova/movies progress, they deviate further and further.

Also: It's not a remake, it's a sequel. It takes place after the events of the original series and movies.

>>24646269

14 or so year time skip

>>24646310
but wasn't Shinji being whiny sort of the point

>>24641385
>implying keying a car isn't a douchier thing to do.

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>>24646354

>>24646362

B-but muh hotblud ;_;

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>>24646407

And Zoid-Evas

I wish I was kidding

>>24641108
You aren't the only one who hates this bro. However, I've played games of this sort that were being run by DMs of excellent quality and ability and the game was fun rather than frustrating. Its not totally impossible to run a game like this and it be a good game.

>>24646662
Zoid?
Do you mean Zord?

>>24646726

No, Zoid.

>>24646662

To be ABSOLUTELY fair, that only happens for a single scene. Still unnecessary, even if not egregious.

>>24646739
i don't understand

>>24646662
>And Zoid-Evas
I don't have a reactiongif for that.

>>24646739
No idea what you're referring to. Explain please.

>>24646749

Zoids are mecha-animals, with a model line and animu with the same name.

>>24646749
>>24646766

http://lmgtfy.com/?q=Zoid

>>24646739
>To be ABSOLUTELY fair, that only happens for a single scene. Still unnecessary, even if not egregious.

Beast mode was a thing in Rebuild 2.0. I hated it there, too

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>>24646814
Found this after clicking that link. Thanks /tg/

>>24642832
you mean dr_energy is automatically overcome by energy.

>>24647054

No, *all* damage reduction is bypassed by energy damage. It only applies to the physical damage types (bludgeoning, slashing, piercing) and untyped damage.

>The creature takes normal damage from energy attacks (even nonmagical ones), spells, spell-like abilities, and supernatural abilities.

A fireball bypasses DR10/- as surely as it bypasses DR10/good or DR10/silver.

>>24647105
that sounds like the kind of thing the group wizard tries to bullshit into truth. You've been bullshitted, good sir.

>>24647158
No, anon, he's right.

>>24647189
Well, I'm glad that rule has been universally ignored in all the games I've been in. 'tis bullshit.

>>24641746
ITT: Entitled players that have unrealistic standards of how DM's should run a game.

They're not paid for it, you know.

>>24647206
>entitled
You have now lost the discussion. Just like bringing up nazis.

>>24647158
From pfsrd:

A creature with this special quality ignores damage from most weapons and natural attacks. Wounds heal immediately, or the weapon bounces off harmlessly (in either case, the opponent knows the attack was ineffective). The creature takes normal damage from energy attacks (even nonmagical ones), spells, spell-like abilities, and supernatural abilities. A certain kind of weapon can sometimes damage the creature normally, as noted below.

>>24647203

Honestly blaster wizards are already the weakest of the weak, forcing them to contend with DR only pushes them further behind summoner-wizards, buffer-wizards, and save-vs-dickrape-wizards.

>>24647228
well, I guess I'll just burn that golem to death with my torch then.

>>24641890
>You literally fought Undead and the occasional demon
>I have no idea what Clerics were supposed to do in that campaign.

wut. Clerics are supposed to excel against evil outsiders and undead. The Good gods are ashamed of you

>>24647248
it's not about the blaster wizards so much as it doesn't make sense.

Hence the burning-golems-with-torches argument.

>>24642781

Most of her roles (and photoshoots) make her grimace like she's constipated, for whatever reason. When she actually smiles she's adorable and looks far younger than 39.

>>24647255
DR (damage reduction) is for physical damages.
Resist is for energy.

It's not that hard.

Though I do prefer the way that 4th edition rolled them into one category.

It is funny that they take full damage from mundane sources of energy damage. I guess they thought that immunity to magic was sufficient.

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>>24643019
>Cersei is one of the less objectionable characters, morally speaking

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>>24647468

>>24641108

>You are hopelessly overpowered and crush everything under your feet as cookie-cutter encounters are chewed up by your spellcasting might.

>You are overshadowed by your teammates because your class and character concept is obsolete and antiquated, and you are not minmaxed enough to make a difference.

>Every member of your team is challenged in encounters that play to the strengths and weaknesses of each player individually, so that everyone serves a purpose.

Pick one.

>>24650672
1!...no,no, this is a tricky question right?, 2?, no, wait, none of them!, yeah, that's the real answer.

>>24650381

That... that looks like fucking brain damage. Or a stroke.

>>24650900
or just in the middle of talking.

>>24650672
I kinda like 1

>>24650973
We have videogames for that.

>>24651106
it's not enough

>>24651290
We have literal circle jerks for that.

>>24646207

Its the Remiel fight from Evangelion 1.x. The first two films are absolutely worth your time, 1.0 follows the plot of the first six episodes of the series more or less exactly, 2.0 jumps off the rails in the first five minutes but is still good, I have heard only batshit crazy things about Evangelion 3.0.

>>24642447
Yes, because if he can ejaculate into a fire creatures eye with a well aimed think load he may be able to jizz on it's fire-based brain, temporarily putting it out and giving his allies an opening.

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>>24652620
>I have heard only batshit crazy things about Evangelion 3.0.

Hey man, Anno won best director for 3.0. Japan loved the movie, they thought it was revolutionary.

>>24652620
The third one is very much the one "in between", the first two set things up, the next one will (hopefully) wrap things up, this movie is where all the new question marks are dumped on us, and most of the new plot threads start.

>>24643552
>>24643646
Not that anon but I've been here years and I'm not good enough with spoilers to do that.

>>24647224
I think you need to check your privalege

>>24647224
No, not really. The DM let the guy use a "deflect projectile" ability to deflect a METEOR. He just didn't let him do it a SHITLOAD of times.

>>24642137
>rpg rule
>anything to do with morality

nigger, what the fuck are you saying ?

>>24642155
>Muh speziul snowflake doesn't like challenges.
If you want special treatment, discuss with the GM before the game, instead of being beta and complaining on /tg/

>>24655516
>Wizard
>Suddently antimagic fields arr day erre day
>Dude complains
>"Muh speziul snowflake doesn't like challenges"

Dude, monk are only good in punching things, and they aren't even that good at that. If the guy specialiced his character to do that, is fucking understandable that he complains when the DM does such a dick move, dickier when you realize it don't affect anybody else but the monk

Imagine all those magic objects for unarmed attacks, all going to thrash because the DM felt like it.

>>24641249
it depends what kind of campaign you are playing. if its just a dungeon crawl for 1 session and everything is made of fire its a dickish move. if its a long open-world campaign there will be places where one or more of the party members will be at a disadvantage. which makes it ok to place such encounters. it makes the party play together because you know you need someone to watch your back when you find yourself in a situation where you are useless.

>>24648010
>I guess they thought that immunity to magic was sufficient.
Well guess who made golems in the first place.
Wizards.
No sense of right or wrong.

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>>24641108
>In this setting magic is ILLEGAL!
>If one person sees you casting even prestidigitation and angry mob is going to brutally gang rape you and burn you at the stake.
>No one decides to roll a spellcaster of any type.
>BBEG is, of course, a fucking badass demon summoning cultist necromancer.
>get our asses handed to us because none of us know magic
>DM: "I'm surprised no one rolled a spellcaster, you guys really could've used a wizard or a cleric or something."

>The one party member that is invariably plotting the moment when he backstabs everyone else for loot
>The guy who complains if he doesn't get dibs on anything that strikes his fancy
>The other guy that is constantly collecting 1000lbs of discarded shit from everything you pass

AND MY PERSONAL NIGHTMARE

>The guy who rerolls a new character mid-campaign specifically to min-max for the setting and adventure path you're on

I ran a campaign where technology was considered an abomination and the clockwork foes that the group began running into around level 4 were heavily hinted to be 1) important and 2) recurring threats. I telegraphed this early so people could start thinking about where they were going to be building their characters towards. I also gave everyone the option of starting a new character (originally this was in mind for character death) at the beginning of the level behind the average party level.

We had a few player deaths, but at about level 12 one player flat out quit on his druid and rerolled a hunter with a ton of supplemental fuckery and feats specifically for constructs, which rendered him ultra-lethal to the things without the hinderance of having to work through all the levels in which a lot of that stuff would've been useless. The others that had died at this point pretty much just rolled what they though was fun and took some of the toolkit to specialize. This dude went the full retarded munchkin route.

>>24660736

We ran that campaign to level 20, and most of the rest of the players had absurd amounts of fun because they'd actually built characters that were fun to play in situations that weren't just "hit robots until they stop moving." The one guy spent long stretches of time complaining that he had nothing to do when all he had built his character to do was hit robots.

Marshal the cities to prepare for a siege?
>But I'm useless for diplomacy.
Investigate the slums to find out who's been dealing mage cadavers to buyers outside the city?
>These guys aren't robots, why should I care?
Negotiate/beat some elemental powers in assisting.
>Man, I can't do anything to elementals, wtf is this?
Corral a cave system of rust monsters and transplant them into hollows in the path of the advancing construct army?
>I can't get close to these things and I didn't take aberrations as a favored enemy, why did the party want to do this?

Sorry dude, I know the campaign was pretty heavily focused on constructs, but if all you can do is kill constructs and ignore building anything up for any other type of play, I'm not going to cry when the rest of the party decides to hare off on something that you contribute next to nothing to.

Guys, is it bad that I plan on having my PCs be the (unwitting) catalyst for the Apocalypse all because they fail to see the problem with keeping a seemingly useless artifact?

>>24660871
Yes.

>>24660887
Even though I've made it perfectly clear this artifact is bad news?

>>24660893
If you want to explain stuff, explain it in detail. Also tell us what kind of guys you're playing with. What's the theme of the campaign, but what is the theme the players want out of this campaign?
And so on and so on.

>>24660480

Eh, that sounds fair. Actually, it'd make playing a mage appealing to me. I love being on the run, and trying to operate clandestinely. It'd make me question whether I should use my fireball in this situation, balancing our chances of success with the chances of word getting out there's a spellcaster in the party. Social stigma, or in this case, outlawry, is a good tradeoff for how powerful spellcasters are.

>>24660917
Its not at all fair to penalise spellcasting so much you can never use it in the view of people you are not willing to kill then criticise the party for not having spellcasters.

>>24660893

Yeah, if you've made it clear that "the One Ring is bad news" and they've chosen not to take it to Mount Doom, they shouldn't be surprised when Sauron starts knocking down the Shire.

>>24660903
Alright, the artifact is a stone egg, through which Lucifer is going to break through the mortal plane, and raise an army to reclaim Infernus. Minor Apoc in a small part of the world, lots of adventuring to be had. This was before I got backstories from my players, who ended up wanting to fight undead. So, I made the egg part of a ritual, and all they have to do is chuck the egg in the middle of the forest and the world is saved. Now, they've had a meet up with necromancer who told them EXACTLY what this egg is. And they still kept it. Well, one member of the party handed it off to the doorman of the local Mage's guild, but antoher one picked it back up because, his words, not mine, "I think we're ruining [My name'] plot." Being at the center of this isn't going to kill them because of DM fiat and divine intervention, but its like he's begging me to start two armies of death and destruction.

>>24660917
No, that type of setting is pants on head retarded, because no mater what, the players are being punished for their class choice.

Pick a spellcaster? welcome to hell, I hope you like overzealous guardsmen and overly suspicious NPCs tracking your every move daring you to cast something.

Not rolling a spellcaster? Welcome to double hell, I hope you enjoy being useless against all the demons, undead and magical traps that you'll be running into in my "low-magic" setting.

>>24660947
really what it was, was a dare, he was just daring us to roll a spellcaster so he could fuck with us.

>>24660999
Okay, if you've spelled it out for them, then it's their own fault.

>>24660999
>dem trips

but yeah, I don't feel that the situation is entirely their fault. You're expecting the players to act against instinct and discard something they view as "important". They're never going to start viewing it as "dangerous" until it actually starts hampering them. Stat penalties, spawning demons that attack them, inducing madness, you know the kind of things you expect from a "cursed" item?

>>24661152
Its not cursed though, its a conduit. But yeah, I guess I should turn up the cursed factor. Could be fun.

>>24660736
You have to think that your players are retarded, some times your hints are so subtle they don't get it, some times they think you're hinting something you don't.

>>24652904
I don't think that's all that hard, reallyAnd I've been hanging out here for like three days.

>>24664575
And now I have discovered that you can't nest more than two layers of spoilers. Fascinating.

>>24661010
>No, that type of setting is pants on head retarded, because no mater what, the players are being punished for their class choice.

Eh, can be done right if it's worked out in the setting well (Aren't mages hated in Dark Sun because they suck the life out of the world?)

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>>24660999
>Alright, the artifact is a stone egg, through which Lucifer is going to break through the mortal plane,
>Stone egg
Oh shiiiit.

>>24643765
so the dm is restricting your movement to a 2-diminsional field
how is that not fun?

I like the other gm though. I'll have to try that next game I run.

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>The DM who honestly thinks Barbarians and Rogues are "just as bad as casters"
>Allows Clerics
I quit

>>24665246
>I quit
No, no!
Step 1: show him a CoDzilla.
Step 1.5: watch him ban it.
Step 2: show him the most broken fighter you can find.

Repeat until he runs out of allowed classes.

> most broken fighter

That is like saying gold medal winner at the special olympics

>>24665345
>That is like saying gold medal winner at the special olympics

But when everybody is playing nonminmaxed fighters... Well you ARE participating in special olympics.

Nevertheless, showing him a cleric still oughta be fun.

>>24665287
Too late, group fell apart because the DM is a retard. You guys in the mood for storytiem?

>>24665422
/tg/ is always in the mood for storytime. Unless you spell it storytiem, we take spelling seriously around here.

>>24665422
>You guys in the mood for storytiem?
Always.

>has Cponsur
Yes captcha, we have a sponsor. Although you need to fix your spelling

>>24665422
Yes.

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>>24665422

>>24665439
Whatever, I've seen it both ways on here.
>Get invited to D&D, figure I haven't played in a while, why not?
>Get introduced to everyone, they all seem cool, DM is a little nerdy but not overtly sperglord
>Everyone starts making characters, DM pretty much breaths down our necks as we do
>"Core only, no Casters!"
>Cool, I'll be a Barbarian, nice, low magic...
>"No Barbarians, they're just as bad!"
>What? Fine, whatever, group needs skill monkey, I'll be a Rogue
>"Rogues are pretty much casters too! No Rogues!"
>If you wanted fighters only, then just fucking say so

>>24665525
That was a terribly boring story. Try harder next time.

>>24665548
Shh, it's a setup (which WAS already said, so it's a not too good setup, but there's probably more to follow)

>>24665525
Party ends up being as follows
>Fighter who hits things
>Fighter who shoots things
>Fighter who is doing his best to be a skill monkey (me)
>Cleric who...wait, what the fuck?
>Guy who I assume must be blowing the DM or some shit gets to roll a Cleric
>"You guys need a healer, don't worry, he's balanced"
>You keep telling yourself that
>Everyone is suddenly starting to get the hint that this is going to be a trainwreck, but we all go along with it
>Meet in a tavern, big surprise
>Hitty fighter wants to start a bar brawl, go figure.
>Barkeep has a MOTHERFUCKING WAND OF FIREBALL
>We're all first level, except for the Cleric who can pretty much do as he pleases
>Assume it's because the fucker can suck a basketball through a garden hose

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>>24641108
>>Plan a campaign in which the players are going to start out as shipwrecked slaves with next to no gear
>>explain that the game will be gritty and realistic, and survival based.
>>explain that they will have to find, steal, or make their own armor, weapons, etc. (A club or quarterstaff is as easy as finding a good tree branch. A sling takes about an hour to make from rope and can throw rocks. I've explained these kinds of things)
>>Explain that the game will also be roleplay heavy, and they'll have to deal with locals, and do some dungeon crawling, but work their way up to being real adventurers. Mainly ply their trades and get an honest coin here or there. Befriend and help locals, etc.
>>Low magic campaign in which spellcasters will have to research spells and gather reagants, etc.

>>THAT FUCKING GUY decides to play a spazztastic half-elf sorcerer with Eschew Materials, who picks the most colorful and ridiculous spells, and treats every situation like a joke and gets the party run out of every town they visit.

>>24665525
That sounds like the most boring setup any GM could think of. All guys specialize in hitting things with sharp things on the end of sticks.

>>24665670

You fucked up by allowing that, and allowing a feat like Eschew Materials in a campaign that was obviously diametrically opposed to such a thing.

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>>24665624
here you go.

>>24665624
>Decide this place is fucked, we all get the hell out of Dodge
>We're told that we "run into the woods" because this train has no brakes CHOO CHOO
>Suddenly zombies
>No explanation, just zombies
>Make Cleric deal with it, cuz he's a Cleric
>He mops up no problem, we explore and find a dungeon
>More zombies and spooky skeletons
>Fighters are useless, because for some reason 18s and 19s aren't hitting
>Finally roll a 20, my time to shine
>"You miss and get counterattacked, 5 damage"
>Fucking what?
>"I don't use criticals, they're unfair"

>>24665670
You are the DM, it's your job to tell him he's a cunt and should pick something that fits the setting.

>>24665713
>>"I don't use criticals, they're unfair"
Oh wow damn.

>>24665713
How can one DM be that stupid? Fighter focused setting with no criticals. Did he also ban weapons and armour?

>>24665713
It's not even circle jerk, he's just wacking-off 1 guy

>>24665713
>I let that sink in as we keep going through the dungeon
>Strategy for every fight is "Let the Cleric do it"
>Except when there's an enemy caster, then it's "Let the Cleric do it while the rest of us run away"
>Notice we're not being awarded XP while the Cleric is getting it willy nilly
>"You guys aren't in combat, therefore no XP"
>Literally can do nothing in combat
>Suddenly dracolich
>At first level
>Of course the Cleric handles it
>He and his butt buddy laugh, rest of us are sick of this shit
>"Wasn't that fun guys? We should do this every week!"
>We leave without a word, never come back, never see or speak to the guy again

>>24665785
>How can one DM be that stupid? Fighter focused setting with no criticals. Did he also ban weapons and armour?
Not even a +1 in sight, I bet. (Unless cleric has them, of course)

>>24665713
>18, 19, 20, not hitting
If you literally can't do anything, it's time to leave. At this point, it's as much your fault for staying as it is his for running it.

>>24665525
You did it completely wrong.

-
This story happened to me a few years back, one of my worst gaming experiences.

>me: 19, rather thin and new to D&D.
>I look online and find a group around two miles from where I live.
>Bring pizza & coca-cola to first session.
>I find the address on my house, it is in a nice suburban neighbourhood. I am surprised because the DM said he was a 19 yr old student.
>I knock on the door, wait a bit and am greeted by an old woman. I immediately apologise for having the wrong house but she stops me. "Hey Anon, you're a real beefcake you are. You must be one of Harry's internet friends".
>Something is amiss, but I go in anyway. The kind old woman leads me into the living room where I see it.
>5"8' at least 20 stone sperglord neckbeard wearing Star Wars Pyjamas at least two sizes two small for him, a fedora painted blue with yellow stars on to resemble a wizards hat and and this godawful trenchcoat. I can't even describe the smell reaking off of this guy, it's literally raw sewage and sweat.
>There are three other people around the table, two of them are like him and wearing fedoras and pyjamas. The other seems pretty normal, and is just wearing a polo. He is cringing slightly.
>"Welcomthe Adventurrer from the darklands of Suburbania, dare you enter the magical realm of Harry-San"

The two people begin chanting "Harry-San our DM, Harry-San our DM", the guy in the polo is silent.

>"Stho. YOU ARE LATE! Buth we willth forgive you, but our adventhurers shouldth have a bit of INTENGRITYY" the DM shouted at me.
>I'm incredibly uncomfortable right now, and am considering running out the door when one of the other two guys pulls me down.
>"Helllooo, I am Danthar the Destroyer Level 8 wizard. We are currently rolling up characters"

>>24665713
At this point, you're just as retarded for sticking around as he is for running this.

>>24665713
Why did you even keep playing?

>>24665811
So basically fighter-heavy game without skills, feats, gear or anything useful. Did you fuck his sister or did he actually think this was a good idea?

>>24665713
You are fucking retarded if you didn't leave at this point.

>>24665824
>>24665838
>>24665854
I'll admit, I should've left sooner, but at least I got a new gaming buddy, a stupid story, and some free soda.

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>>24665830
>dare you enter the magical realm of Harry-San"
picveryrelated

>>24665864
You're not pointing your quoter at the storytimer, Anon.

>>24665864
I'm guessing the DM wanted to run a two-bit Shounen anime campaign, with the Cleric friend as the special protagonist and everyone else as the cheerleading squad.

>>24665830
We introduce each other. At the table is Harry (we must refer to him as DM Harry-San), Richard, Doug, and James. I am Chris. Richard and I are tasked with creating new characters, we have both seemingly responded to the same online ad in our area.

>Richard says that he wants to play a cleric since the party had no obvious casters.
>The DM stands up, his rolls of fat seemingly grow as he stands up to a mighty height of 5"8', he looks down at Richard and screams "CORE ONLY, NO CASTERS"
>"B…but Doug is playing a wizard"
>"Doug canto be trusthed, not like you! Pickth another clasth" he spits everywhere as he says this.
>"S…sorry"
By this time I am beginning to resent Richard for being a craven. I step up: "I would like to play a barbarian"
>Our DM turns around, this takes literally ten seconds as his folds of fat move around to look at me sitting on the floor. "Barbarianthss….. Barbarianthsss. They're just as bad as casters"
>I look up at him "Look, can you just be frank. What can I play?"
>He looks down at his book and back up to me and smirks: "becauseth of your rudeness, truenamer. And you will addressth me as DM Harry-Sthan"

Harry turns around again looks at Richard. "andth because of your rudeness, you will play a samurai. I will decide your sthats"

>>24665830

>bestbetrollingnigga.jpg

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>>24665830

>>24665810
Jesus Christ, dude. That experience sounds akin to getting mugged.

>>24665930
>"Barbarianthss….. Barbarianthsss. They're just as bad as casters"
>>I look up at him "Look, can you just be frank. What can I play?"
Shit, they're multiplying.

>>24666060
Probably spore based. Or the whores have really low standards now.

>>24666060
seriously
like
barbarians are awesome
and fun as hell.

I get the casters thing, maybe. Maybe. But holy shit "Barbarians are as bad as casters" is dumb.

>>24665525
>Rogues are pretty much casters too!
But he's right, at least if you're playing them correctly

>>24666141
But they're less gay.

>>24665930
>I agree, I didn't want to waste a night so I went with it and made a reasonable enough level six true namer.
>I was two levels behind the rest of the party which made things harder for me.
>Richard had apologised, and was allowed to play a fighter.
>I have dignity

The campaign starts, and I'm just playing a guy with a wand of fireballs. My class abilities are so terrible that it's just not at all worth playing anything else. We start in a tavern sitting together until we are told by an adventurer that there is something in the wizards tower.

We decide to go to the wizards tower. I thought it would be funny if I stayed behind and did some peasant-tier quests back at the tavern but the DM told me: "I'm on the edth of my tetherth with you, stopth trying to derail this game you silly troll. Inthfact, as punishthment I will maketh you a troll" and with that, I was made a large green troll. He recalculated my stats, and said that because I was a troll I was not allowed to use wands because they were made for humans and because I had specialised in mental skills I had VERY low strength so couldn't wield a club very effectively. This took a good fifteen minutes, meanwhile we had to be silent.

Doug, or Denthenor asks the DM if he is allowed to get rid of a spell slot so he can cast a spell that makes me under his control since trolls have violent impulses.

>"Hue hue hue hue. Yesth you can denethor, yes you can!" and he looks at me for a good twenty seconds and smiles at me. I keep a pokerface.

Anyway, we head to the wizards tower and see a wizard floating about. The wizard uses telekinesis to pick up Richard (no save) and he is suspended in mid-air.

This is where things start to get really damned awkward.

>>24665830
>That scenery

I would have answered
>Jehova's witness, do you mind if I speak to you about salvation and stuff?
And pray the gods they kick me out quickly.

Nice save.

>>24666186

I have no idea whether you are trolling or not, but this tale intrigues me.

>>24666327
>turns into a troll
>trolling
Of course he is

>>24666141
>He's right
2/10
You made me reply

I can still see it now. Harry, our DM standing up and putting a tight grip on Richard's Leg. He is obviously really shy and too scared to actually do anything.

>"The wizardth makes you a catboy. DOUGTh, GET THE NEKO EARS"
>Dug runs upstairs, which is rather a sight because of how large he is. When he returns, his fedora has fallen off and he is holding it in his hands.
>I look inside the fedora.
>There are are some handcuffs and a ballgag, I am not even kidding.
>Richard says that he is uncomfortable.
>"Uncomorthable are you? Wellth, we are not allowing you to powergameth. You will ruinth the adventurer"

Richard is literally so nervous, he lets them put the ball-gag and cat ears on him. I literally cannot believe anybody would let this happen. The reasoning is that since a cat cannot speak it will prevent metagaming but personally I think it's absolutely fucking mental.


>After a minute of struggling, Richard is lying with cat-ears, a ballgag, handcuffs on the floor.
>James smiles "May I do the honours sir DM-San?"
>A sharpie draws cat whiskers and nose onto Richard.
>I look in horror.
>"Make a willth save, Christh"
>I roll my dice, the obese DM is staring directly at me.
>Natural 20.

There is a moment of silence. The DM doesn't even look down at the dice, instead he stares directly at me with a smirk in the centre of his many chins.

"Fail"

This better be an aristocrats joke because I refuse to believe the story is true.

>>24665930
wait
maybe i'm misunderstanding this
but
aren't truenamers a type of caster?

I call magnets, this story can't be true

>>24666453
Yes, but they are terribly weak.

>>24666453

Technically, yes. Good luck hitting the 20+ DC skill checks you'll need to achieve any kind of usefulness at early levels, though.

>>24666453
They are the weakest among the weakest, they can do magic in any situation, but for some reason, some retarded dude thought that's broken as fuck so they made them in the same tier as the samurai and monk

>>24666535
that's dumb as hell
because the fluff is cool as shit
I mean, manipulating the universe by speaking the TRUE NAMES of things is such a cool idea.

You know what'd be fun? A character that's some sort of scholar/librarian kind of thing.
They use truename magic and writing down runes as the focus of their abilities, as well as some lore stuff.
Lots of studying, enjoying books, and it's all about language. You could even do a linguist character, who speaks many languages, including true name magic stuff, and serve as a sort of diplomat character. Like a bard, almost, except instead of music, it's all about your voice. Convincing people, manipulating the world with true names, that sort of thing.

>>24666372
Everything seems to happen at once. I feel a sharp pain in the back of my head, I feel warm blood trickling down the back of my neck and move to put my hand and feel it. Harry the DM standards up and takes off his glasses and blue fedora to reveal a balding head, he has to be about twenty or so but his acne, patterned baldness - tied with a ponytail at the back, weight and small eyes make him look far far older. He smiles and clicks his fat fingers together again, I feel another sharp pain in the back of my head and my vision goes blurry. I turn around to see Doug hitting me with a chair-leg.

I'm sure a lot of people won't believe this, it really does sound too shocking to be true but I was being hit over the head by these man-children seemingly as part of a game they had taken too seriously. I collapsed onto the floor coughing blood all over the carpet, I couldn't find the will to stand up - I felt nauseous. I began to crawl towards the exit. Then, I think I was kicked in the side of the head by Harry.

I woke up later in a hospital, I had been knocked unconscious. A day later, police came to question me about the incident. I explained the story as I have just done above but was told that these people tell a very different story, about how I got aggressive and attacked one of them. I asked them about Richard, but the police said they hadn't interviewed one: he had obviously escaped before the police came.
I wanted to press charges, but I did not have the money for a solicitor or any evidence.

>>24665830
>>24665930
>>24666186
>>24666372
>>24666634


Bullshit.

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>>24666634
what a let down

>>24666665
An obstute observation, I second your outcall.

MALE BOVINE EXCRAMENTS!

>>24666634

> no evidence
> self defence wounds only
> other party untouched

Cool story bro tell me another. Do you even csi?

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>>24666634

Even the captcha saw it coming.

>>24666741
The police basically told me not to press charges because I wouldn't get very far.

>>24666833

I am honestly curious why you pulled back in the last part. You had a great build up but then fell flat. Was it just writers block? It kinda feels almost like it was written by a different person.

>>24666943
Yes

>>24666943
>It kinda feels almost like it was written by a different person.
Mm yeah, greentext suddenly vanished from the format..

>>24666956
Should've gone for Aristocrats.

>>24666634
Somebody tried to hijack the story. Nice try lol.
-

The rest of the session was really zany.
>Richard spent the rest of the session as a 'cat', which meant wearing a load of weird gear to stop him from moving and such.
>Doug got really touchy around Richard, stroking him and everything. This was part of the 'roleplay'
>The wizard cast telekinesis on me.
>Do I get a save?
>"Nopeth, you don't get anythingth"

And with that, I walked out. I don't know what happened to Richard but I felt a little guilty leaving him behind. The mother had been sitting by the door on a chair listening.

>"Where do you think you're going?"
>I told her that her son was mental and swaggered out.
>Since I still had the postcode, I ordered thirty pizzas to the house. I didn't get a callback to confirm, seemingly they actually bought them all.

I never went back.

>>24641483
There's only so much you can do.
>Last night running Deathwatch.
>Killteam on feudal planet, about to defend it from Plaguemarines. Which have been building in story, but didn't really intend for them to fight them, but they're doing it, so fuck it.
>Try to be good GM.
>A captain of the Royal military mentions that there is a sub-basement under the royal palace that has a vault that has never been opened that contains an Astartes only gene-authentication system.
>Put a couple of old supply droppods in a bunker that the palace was built around. >Contains plasma guns, pistols.
>Fucking derpwit tactical marine uses his bolt pistol in CC. And seems to be frustrated that it's not doing anything.
>MFW.