Previous threads: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive.html?tags=bizarre%20adventure%20questIt was a quiet night.Quiet, save for the crackling of flames, the screams of terror and the blood dripping from the blade of your axe.Men, women, children. It didn't matter so long as they were foolish enough to raise a hand in resistance against you.Your breath hung heavy underneath the falling snow, the fur cape draped across your shoulders doing little to grant you warmth. It had been a long night."J----! J---- J-----------!" your uncle yelled, waking you from your musings. "Quickly, before she gets away!" he cried, pointing in the distance.Through the light of the burning houses you see her, back turned to you, crying in terror and covered in blood. She had a large head start from you, too far to run down in your current condition.You grip your axe and raise it over your head to throw it.A woman, terrified with her back turned to you.[ ] Kill her.[ ] Miss on Purpose.
Whoa, BAQ this early in the morning? And I'm awake to catch it? That's a great way to start the day! [X] Miss on purpose.Story conventions tell me the fleeing woman is our universe's Lisa Lisa
>>23240088>[ ] Miss on Purpose.there is no honor in killing her if she doesn't turn to face us in combat.
>>23240351>>23240418Your axe left your hand with a mighty toss, blade spinning wildly in the air and heading straight for the woman with wild abandon.And you wake up, the top half of your body having fallen to the floor while your legs remained on top of your bed. You sit up, rubbing your head and yawned loudly, rubbing the sleep from your eyes.Light streamed in from the slit of your tent's flap. You woke up having some kind of nightmare, but you couldn't exactly remember the details of it. No matter, it was a brand new day in this bizarre little adventure you found yourself in.Freshening up, you step out of your tent to find that it was just a little past dawn. When you got here, late last night, it seemed like you, Lisa Lisa and several others were the only ones here. Now however, people filled the streets of the tent city as the morning buzz started all around you.People of various shapes and sizes were walking around, going about their business. What do you do?[ ] Investigate the man from the tent in front of yours, seemingly doing a slow dance.[ ] Check the strand of silk stalkings Lisa Lisa gave you[ ] use the ring to summon Loranz and ask him about the race[ ] check the commotion down the street were a crowd was starting to gather[ ] Breakfast!!!
>>23240534>[ ] Check the strand of silk stalkings Lisa Lisa gave yousee if it still securely tied in our beard.>then ask the man across the street what the commotion is about while we summon Loranz to get us breakfast.>heh.
>>23240534>[ ] Breakfast!!!Everyday must start with a balanced breakfast.
>>23240534breakfast. but if going to breakfast we just so happen to go past the commontion, then who are we to argue
>>23240632>>23240697You feel your beard and are relieved to find that the string is still securely tied to one of its locks. the long end flowed to an imaginary wind, no doubt pointing in Lisa Lisa's direction. It maintained pointing her direction steadily, so she was probably still asleep.You feel a grumbling in your gut. Looks like it was time for breakfast, you think to yourself as you pull out the ring that summoned Loranz. Not sure how to use it, you merely yelled. "Oi, Loranz! Bring me some food!"There was a buzz, and the ring shined, Loranz's voice echoing in your head. "Sorry buddy, but it ain't in my contract to play your personal nanny." he said, agitated to have been bothered so early. "Ciao." With that, the ring stopped glowing, and you were standing here still without food in your belly."Impetuous cat..." you grumble as you warily eye the commotion, approaching your neighbor. "Good morning! what's that all about then?" you say, jutting a thumb to the crowd.The man stopped what he was doing and opened one eye, tilting his top hat. "Just the fires of youth, nyohoho." he said cheerily, then closed his eyes, resuming the rhythmic, slow movements he was practicing before.What do? Choose one[ ] investigate the commotion[ ] ask what the man is doing?[ ] breakfast
>>23240836he seems busy, lets ask him about it if we see him again.the commotion has sparked my interest but we really need to eat. maybe Sanji has more of that meat.
>>23240908You thank the man with a tilt of your hat and give the commotion one last gaze before you head for the direction of Sanji's restaurant.You were curious but these things could wait. A real man knows the importance of a balanced breakfast to start the day. And by balanced breakfast you mean meat. Lots and lots of meat.Finding Sanji's restaurant was easy enough even if you've only been there once, you just followed the scent and the traffic of people all going in the same direction. You step inside the tent, finding yourself in the same lavish place, Sanji hauling trays of food around from table to table.He eyes you, grinning in amusement at your new clothes. "Hey asshole! Now that's better!" he said over the bustle of the diners. "Go find a table!""Thanks, girly man!" you yell back cheerily. "Bring me the same as last night!"Soon enough, you munched down happily on your leg of meat. That was when you felt a cold chill run up your spine. "Eh?" turning around, you see that a pale face was staring at your back.The Joker was seated in the table behind yours, Harley Q next to him, eating a bowl of oats.Lisa Lisa had said that she suspected he was stalking her, and that encounter last night still grated on your nerves. Still, she did ask you not to intervene. Now however, his cold eyes looked at you with the gaze of a butcher eyeing a beast to cut up. What do?[ ] confront[ ] ignore
>>23241119>[ ] ignoreif he wants to ogle us fine, but we don't swing that way, let's just enjoy the great food we have been served and be on our way.
>>23241119Ignore him. A real man does not let the gaze of cowards interfere with his breakfast.
>>23241228>>23241253You don't give him any recognition whatsoever and turn back to resume your meal. If he wants to keep ogling your back, let him. A man does not let the gaze of cowards perturb himself.You hear Harley Q's voice from behind you. "Where are you going, puddin'?" she asked confusedly.A few seconds later, Joker walked up to your table, his bowl of oats in one hand and pulled up the chair across from yours, sitting down in front of you. "I hope you don't mind some company?" he says with a voice that was exaggerated for theatrics sake as he takes a spoonful of the oats.The tables surrounding yours started to hush, and more than one person took their meal and left the immediate vicinity.
>>23241373What do you do/say?
>>23241373>>23241394i do not mind.then get back to eating, breakfast is more important that this creepy guy.
>>23241394Tell him he's welcome to sit here as long as he does not interrupt our breakfast.Then ignore him and get back to eating.
>>23241519>>23241586"Go ahead." You say gruffly, marveling at how you were able to keep your temper in check. Instead, you distract yourself from the creepy guy in front of you and proceed to continue with your meal. "Just mind yourself."It was a low rumble at first, before the Joker broke out, bellowing in laughter as if he'd just heard the most hilarious thing in his life. "Why so serious?" he asked, a manic grin on his face. suddenly, he swept his hand across the table, knocking all of the food and dishes to the floor in a clatter. "I know what will lighten you up, Mr. grumpy-grumps." he said, producing a deck of cards that he shuffled in his hands. "How about a magic trick?"You have no recollection of your past save for nonspecific snippets of memories, but you suspect that your patience has never been tried to this extent.What do?[ ] yes, a magic trick sounds lovely[ ] No, i'd rather not[ ] flip table over[ ] calmly get up and leave
>[X] yes, a magic trick sounds lovelyNow I'm just plain curious.
>>23241689He... he just knocked our breakfast off the table?Motherfucker, flip the table and go get more breakfast.
>>23241689>[ ] yes, a magic trick sounds lovelyHe's just doing this shit to piss us off, keep calm and don't let him get to you.
>>23241768>>23241772Since there's only two of you jojobros for now, roll 1d100 with your choice
>>23241689>[ ] yes, a magic trick sounds lovelyhe's trying to get a reaction out of us, trying to see if we're amusing. let's see if we can turn this around.>there are probably 3 jojobros here
>>23241768>>23241815>>23241847The bastard just tossed away your food, you say to yourself in disbelief. You could feel the vein throb in your forehead, and Tryggr The Warrior's Code rose up from behind you, folding his arms across his chest menacingly. The both of you give the Joker a venomous glare that the clown just plays off, grinning eagerly back at you. He's fishing for a reaction, you say to yourself. He's goading you into doing something stupid. "Yes, a magic trick sounds lovely." You manage to say without clenching your teeth in anger."Wonderful!" The Joker said as he started to shuffle the cards in intricate ways, tossing them in the air and catching them behind his back or making them spin in his hands. He dealt three cards in front of him and set down the rest of the deck to the side. You stare at him for a bit, prompting him to clear his throat. "Pick a card!" he says cheerily.Do you say anything? What do?[ ] pick a card[ ] raise the manly eyebrow and stare him down
>>23241945>[ ] raise the manly eyebrow and stare him downi wonder what this guy will do when we just sit here and don't pick.
>>23241945Raise the manly eyebrow, this is not a magic trick, he is putting pieces of card in front of us.I am a viking and what is this?
>>23242000>>23242043"Hey... Pick a card." The Joker said again, his grin somewhat fading.You raise a manly eyebrow and stared at him expectantly. Magic trick? You see glimpses of your past life flash a bit before you. You've seen magic, performed by shamans, but you don't quite remember the context. Whatever this was, it was most certainly not magic. You sit there and say nothing, staring him down.The smile on the Joker's face fades entirely. "Hmmm..." he says, looking you over thoughtfully. "Are you stupid or deaf? I told you to pick a card." He leaned back on his chair and folded his arms, looking up at Tryggr the Warrior's Code who was looming behind you. "So that is your stand? Pathetic." he said. Green gas started to rise from his shoulders, quickly forming a cloud above him. "Stay away from Lisa Lisa." he says bluntly. "She is mine."What say?
>>23242167"You're trying to threaten me? I guess you can tell a good joke when you try."
>>23242167Ask why. Also, challenge him to a drinking contest. He has to leave her alone when he loses.
>>23242167i have seen magic and this right here... is not magic.you say she is yours, and yet she doesn't want anything to do with you.all i see here is an unmanly bully trying to force himself on a kindhearted woman.that's not funny at all.
No. Not a drinking contest.An eating contest.
>>23242167I don't think you're man enough to handle her.
>>23242351>>23242303>>23242283"You're trying to threaten me?" You observed, stating the obvious. "I guess you can tell a good joke when you try."If it elicited any kind of reaction, the Joker didn't let it show on his face. So you decide to beat him at his own game and goad him some more."I have seen magic and this right here..." you say, pointing at the cards. "Is not magic."He says nothing, and a humanoid silhouette appearing in the swirling gas above the Joker, blue eyes shining through. Tryggr The Warrior's Code locked gazes with it and engaged it in a stare down."You say she is yours, and yet she doesn't want anything to do with you." you continue, referring to Lisa Lisa. "All i see here is an unmanly bully trying to force himself on a kindhearted woman. That's not funny at all." You say seriously. "Why are you harassing her?"Still, The Joker said nothing, and you weren't sure if his silence unnerved or annoyed you."How about a competition?" you say. "You lose, and you don't bother her anymore."That finally earned a reaction from the Joker, who laughed heartily. "Sorry, but I don't play with others like that." he says. "The Joker plays by his own rules. As for Lisa Lisa, hers or your opinion matters little to me." he said, picking up the deck of cards from the table. "I tried being civil, asking you to step away. But I suppose you're too savage for that, now aren't you?" With a flick of his wrist, he threw the deck of cards in your face. Suddenly, in mid air, you see the cards' edges gleam in the light. They were razor sharp, you realize.What do/say?[ ] Deflect the cards![ ] Dodge!
>>23242609Deflect inferior CARDS with superior BEARD.
>>23242609Stand and tank them with your abs. Then flex to push them out.
>>23242609>[ ] Deflect the cards! in style!savage? says the wimp throwing sharp cards.
>>23242670>>23242686>>23242748Instinctively, Tryggr the Warrior's Code dove back into your body, and you feel your skin and muscle harden as the Stand imbued you with it's strength. there were a lot of cards flying at you, more than what you could probably deflect. Your Stand made you stronger and faster, but you wondered if it made you tougher as well.Roll 1d100 for tanking/deflecting!
Rolled 62>>23242823And POSE!
Rolled 83>>23242823Or I could fuck it up and need to try again. Derp.
Rolled 20>>23242859>>23242914>>23242987Joker smirked. "One Bad Day."(cont'd)
Rolled 14>>23243029Your form was excellent as you stood up, Tryggr the Warrior's Code's arms blurring as they unleashed a barrage of punches at the cards. But something was making your movements feel sluggish or unnatural. Maybe it was the light that got in your eyes, or your muscles were still weary from sleep. Whatever it was, you weren't deflecting as much cards with your punches, and a good number of them make contact on your body.Still, your muscles tensed and they failed to even break through your skin. You almost grinned cockily until you realized something, the cards were just normal playing cards, not the razor sharp weapons you thought you saw.But you know what you saw, you tell yourself. Joker must have somehow changed the cards while they were in mid air. Was that his ability?"My, my..." The Joker said with a satisfied grin. "Aren't we jumpy. It seems my suspicions were correct; Your stand is pathetic. With power like that, you have no right to stand between Lisa Lisa and myself. She's pretty, right? I bet you she's also delicious."What say?[ ] attack him[ ] stay your hand
>>23243178>[ ] stay your handAgain, it's obvious he's trying to bait us into doing something rash. Plus fighting in the camps is against the rules. His plan is probably to get us to break that rule and have us kicked out/disqualified/killed/etc.
Rolled 45>>23243178Pick up one of the cards, preferably the joker.Then tear it in half."I've picked my card."
Rolled 61>>23243178>[X] stay your handFighting in the camp ain't allowed, right? Also, considering the way she first dropped in, would probably piss him off to tell him about knowing exactly how delicious though firsthand experience, hah.>kelyuth testiI think captcha is trying to warn us that one of the elder gods is cranky today
>>23243178>[ ] stay your handshould we tell him she gave us a kiss? i bet that would piss him the fuck off."that's funny because she kissed me, and not you."or some sassy talk which i can't think of right now>i think his stand is messing with our head, being gas and all.
Rolled 61>>23243242The laugh hysterically at your own bad joke and ask him if he gets it.
Rolled 5>>23243222>>23243242>>23243267>>23243272The two of you lock eyes, and a smug grin started to grow on the Joker's face. You'd have love nothing more than to smash his face in at that moment, but you managed to control yourself. This was his game. The Joker said he only played by his own rules, and you think to yourself it's time to play by your own.Picking up one of the cards on the table, you look at it to see that it was appropriately The Joker card. "I've picked my card." you say, showing it to him. You then proceed to tear it in half, throwing the pieces in his face.It was at this moment that Sanji appeared, finally checking up on the commotion and looking livid. "Hey! Why are you assholes wasting food in my restaurant!" he growled, turning to the Joker. "Hey, I warned you before not to get cute around here, clown bastard!"Joker merely smiled. "Sorry, my hand slipped.""The hell it did!" Sanji yelled angrily, much to the joker's amusement."Sorry Sanji." you say as you turned to leave. "I'm going, I've lost my appetite.""Watch your back." Joker called out to you as you left. "Would be a shame if something happened to you."You turned to see him looking smugly at you while Sanji was busy cleaning up the mess. "Hey, clown bastard, you're right, Lisa Lisa is delicious." you say, remembering how you met her. "I should know." That wiped the grin on his face, and you turned to leave, content on leaving him simmering.You make your way back to your tent, and you seem to find your way instinctively back to your 'street'. The man was still there, moving rhythmically in front of his tent, as well as the commotion down the street. You needed to distract yourself from what just happened or your mood would be foul the whole day.What do?[ ] check out the commotion[ ] investigate the man
>>23243498>[ ] check out the commotionAcknowledge the man as you're walking past. A wave or nod.
Rolled 3>>23243498[X] check out the commotionI smell shenanigans! ONWARD TO...erh...SOMETHING!>Rolling for the hell of it, and this where I have to be going. Accursed job. Keep being excellent, good sirs!
>>23243498>[ ] check out the commotiongreet the man and check out the crowd
Rolled 16>>23243600Cheers jojobro, you can always catch these on the archives, have a great day! will start to do these more regularly on the weekends when my schedule saturates, don't worry.
>>23243498Check out the commotion.
Rolled 3>>23243576>>23243600>>23243615"Hail, neighbor!" You give the man a friendly nod and tilt your hat as you pass him by on the way to check out the commotion, and he smiles at you, tilting his own hat, before resuming his exercise.There was a crowd of people, mostly men, and they seemed to be cheering as something happened in the middle. Making your way through the crowd, you get a glimpse of what the commotion was all about.Two men were sitting on a table, their arms locked together as they arm wrestled. One of them, a larger man, was straining furiously, his muscles bulging with effort as he tried to make his opponent budge. His opponent was a considerably leaner man with blue hair, tattoos all over his upper body and wearing a pair of orange shades, grinning with amusement at the larger man's efforts."You think you can beat me?" he says with a wry grin. "Who the hell do you think I am!" he shouts as he slams the larger man's hand down onto the table.The man fell to the ground, clutching his arm while the crowd cheered."That makes win number 43 for today!" the blue haired man says cockily. "Any more challengers?"What do/say?
Rolled 20>>23243783Ho, Friend. I shall face you in this test of might!
Rolled 28>>23243783if i can beat the smith, you sir are an easy challenge.
>>23243783arm wrestling a sport of manly men.we need this after that little run in with Joker.
>>23243806>>23243856>>23243891Arm wrestling, you observed, a smile creeping on your face. What with the no-hostility rule in the camp, this was probably one of the few ways that people could let out their testosterone driven frustrations without stepping out of the camp and killing each other. This was exactly what you needed to clear your head and cleanse your palate."Ho, friend!" you say out loud with a smile on your face, stepping out of the crowd and striking a pose. "I'll challenge you!"The blue haired man smirked at your antics. "Well, I don't think I've seen you around before! You new?""Came in last night." you answered."Well take a seat! Take a seat!" he said, waving you over to the table. "Let's see what you got!"You grin cockily as you set a large muscled arm on the table. "It's only fair to warn you, I've beaten the Blacksmith." you say cockily as he set his considerably thinner arm on the table. "Don't blame me if you hurt yourself.""You beat the Blacksmith?" he said with amazement, before breaking into a toothy grin. "Wow! I thought I was the only one who could!" he gripped your hand in his, and you were taken by surprise at the pressure this smaller man exerted with his grip. This little man was very strong, you think to yourself. "I'm looking forward to this!"Roll 1d100, best of 1st 3, must beat my roll.(cont'd)
Rolled 5>>23244090roll 1d100 and beat this roll, best of 1st 3
Rolled 52>>23244090haha. thank you.
Rolled 50>>23244102Well damn.
Rolled 1>>23244102sure, let's try that
Rolled 69>>23244148>My sides.
Rolled 58>>23244148god damn it
>>23244102>>23244124>>23244148either we beat him or we somehow get a draw when everything within a 3 meter radius starts breaking under the combined pressure of so much manlyness in one place.
Rolled 91>>23244180or we were beating him, then swoon over his manliness and accidentally lose.
>>23244148Well I feel a bit better, haha>>23244124>>23244155The both of you start to exert pressure, and even if you prepared yourself that the man in front of you was stronger than he looked, you were still taken by surprise at just how strong he was. Slowly, steadily, despite your initial set back, you exert a burst of strength and manage to gain the upper hand. Tryggr The Warrior's Code appeared next to you, boosting your arm as you slowly started to overwhelm him.Even when he was losing, the man's smile never left his face. On the contrary it was getting wider. With one final push, you manage to slam his arm down the table with a victorious roar."Victory!" you say triumphantly as the crowd cheered around you."Wow." he said, "You're pretty strong!" He stood up on the table and addressed everybody. "Hey everyone, let it be know that from this day forth, this man is now my little brother!" he says, grinning down at you enthusiastically.You didn't know how you felt about that.what say?
Rolled 61>>23244318No worries Big Bro, it is always good to have a MAN in the family.
>>23244318lock arms with the man "you are a true man! i would be honored to call you brother. alas you may find me to be not that small!"
>>23244431>>23244364You lock arms with the man. "Hah! Call me what you wish, even if I'm not so little! My name is Dio!" you say cheerily. "It's good to find another true man around here! I'd be honored to call you big brother!""Kamina!" he says, shaking your hand. "You piqued my interest, lil bro! So why not indulge me in a rematch?" he was still smiling, but there was fire in his eyes as he raised his other hand. "Care to take me on with me using my dominant hand?"You were impressed. all this time he was using his nondominant hand.Then you realized something. You only beat him after he went through 43 other strong men consecutively. He was also not using his stand.You frowned."What do you say?" he said cheerily.[ ] take him on![ ] decline
>>23244597>[ ] take him on!i don't even mind if we lose, he's been a real champ.
>>23244597you think that i would back away from a challenge from a fellow manly opponent? who the hell do you think you are?
>>23244597>[X] take him on!
>>23244641>>23244649>>23244691"You'd think I'd back down from a challenge like that?" you say proudly, pointing at him. "Who the hell do you think you are?!"He laughed at that. "I wouldn't expect less from somebody I'd call a little brother!" Kamina said grinning as you two lock arms once again. You see something rise from his back, folding it's arms as it watched you impassively. "This is my stand, Gurren Lagan." he says matter of factly. He turns to the crowd and calls out. "Hey! You guys try not to die, okay?"Wait, what?(cont'd)
Rolled 82>>23244802roll 1d100, taking the best of the 1st 3
Rolled 85>>23244802>>23244813holy balls.
Rolled 16>>23244813oh dog
>>23244831>>23244826>>23244813Even if this was your second time taking him on, the first time was nothing compared to the force he was exerting now. Your muscles bulged as it strained against his arm, the exertion showing on your face as your veins throbbed, trying to keep up with the demand of your muscles.Kamina grinned manically as both your arms started to shake, neither one backing down. Above the both of you, Tryggr the Warrior's Code and Gurren Lagann had also locked arms, mimicking your own display below.A strong gust of wind started to pick up, surrounding the both of you in a tornado of sorts, and the crowd backed away as the very ground seemed to shake with your battle.How was this small man so strong? You ask yourself as you struggled to even match his strength. This was a true man. It'd do him dishonor if you gave up now."ORAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA~!" you roar, the veins of your neck throbbing as you reached deep within yourself to tap into your strength."COME ON!!" Kamina roared as he felt your sudden burst of strength.The very ground threatened to break, until slowly, surely, you started to move Kamina's hand down. The table started to crack, little pieces of it floating in the air."WRRRYYYYYYY~!" with a sudden burst, you slam his hand down hard on the table, dissipating the wind around you.The two of you panted, and the crowd slowly started to come back, cheering."That..." Kamina started to say, a glint of seriousness in his eyes, before splitting into a grin. "THAT WAS AWESOME!""Thanks..." you panted.What say?
Dear Jojoguy;When this quest started, I had high hopes for it. The first and second threads were of high caliber. However, I do not care for the frequent cameos from other anime/manga, regardless of dimensional nonsense, and therefore will no longer be following this quest.However, I hope this does not discourage you from running further, and wish you the best of luck in your questery.Sincerely, some guy on /tg/.
>>23245093"we need a drink." while grinning at him.>have to go now.>good luck gentlemen.
>>23245101No probs, it's my first quest and I'm still learning the ropes. Different strokes for different blokes I guess, I'm not so creative as to make original characters and using strictly jojo characters seemed too dull for me. For a random guy on the internet, I appreciate you putting up your grievances so eloquently.Cheers to you good sir, the world needs more people like you.
>>23245093first ask around to make sure our manly battle did not harm anyone in the crowd. then go drinking. We need to introduce this young man to how Vikings! party. and probably wonder if this is what these people do all day until it is time for the race
>>23245183>>23245266You manage to get up and stay up on your feet as you look around to assess the damage. Everyone and everything seemed to be okay, you observed as the crowd cheered on. You feel an arm on your shoulder, and you turn to see Kamina panting, but with a smile on his face."Damn, lil bro!" he said in between gasps for air. "You're pretty strong!""You too, big bro." You say, "You're probably the strongest guy I've met around here. Is this all you guys do for fun?""Oh, this and that." Kamina replied. "Boredom can make a guy go crazy, and trust me, there are already some pretty crazy guys around here that we don't need to add to their numbers.""Oh, I know." you agree, thinking back on your past experiences. "So... Is there anywhere that we can get a drink in this hell hole?""Is there?" Kamina replied, laughing. "Come on, big brother's gonna give you the grand tour!"Wrapping it up here for now, cheers jojobros, thanks for participating.
>>23245530Thanks Bizarro, entertaining as always.
Rolled 7>>23245101I kinda agree with this anon, I'm afraid. I really like the style you've got, and the things that are happening, but the character inserts hurt the whole thing.I'll stick around though.
>>23245783This is some food for thought now that I know it bothers at least two people. Will do my best to incorporate more JoJo and original characters in coming updates, but there will still be some cameo inserts, just not as much as I had originally intended.Cheers
>>23246056i havent read jojo, so any character that you introduce i will usually have to look up. but so far i am enjoying the quest