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Jesus fucking christ why.

WHY YOU FOOL!

YOU'RE ONLY MAKE IT SO IT NEVER DIES!

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IT CAN NEVER BE UNDONE

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WHY

>>23165167
>>23165230
>>23165248

I can't help it. It's holding a piece of my soul enchanted, crying "once more! Play me once more, that I may yet live, or I shall surely perish..."

I'm so very sorry.

>>23165116
We start, where anyone would, with the cover. The book is called a "Game Master's Bible", in spite of the fact that this is really a book which is for both players and game masters, since it has all the rules for creating Player Characters in the first three-quarters of the book... roughly. See, there's no unified "creating a character" area, which is why it took me so goddamn long the first time I tried it.

So, onward to the introduction area: "Welcome travellers and adventurers to the new and wonderful world of Atlantasia; where magic roams freely and Dragons rule the realms."

Don't know if you caught it or not, but the word "travelers" is misspelled in the first sentence.

Oh yes, we're going through one of these. Such quality writing, can you believe that this cost $49.99 less than two years ago?

And what is the deal with magic roaming freely? Well... it doesn't, really. in any way more remarkable than wizards and magical beasts roam the world, so just like every other fantasy setting ,ever. and how do dragons rule? Well, they don't, actually. they just happen to be stronger than normal monsters that are fairly smart and have magic spells. So, kinda like most other fantasy games, at least, since 3.5 came out.

Anyhow, the introduction is a train wreck all by itself, it goes on about how fighters can simply charge in and wreck any early encounter, and how other classes are being given in order to "enhance their gaming experience", whatever that means. And it dillies on a bit about temples of worship and schools of magic, but, I'm gonna gloss over that, just to get to the good stuff:

Character creation! We have four races to chose from: Human, Elf, Dwarf, and *shudder* Gnome.

Rolled 1

>>23165378
Of course, as with my previous character creation, i shall be doing all of this stuff *randomly*, by rolling dice wherever opportunities present themselves, and using whatever is available to make my PC. Right now, four racial choices, so i'm rolling a d4.

A word about each of the races
Humans: you knwo them. Hell, you are one of them. Nothing special about them at all. no bonuses, no penalties (not that the penalties ever actually *matter*)

Elves: there's 7 different types of elves. Seven. And if I roll a 2 on this die, I'll have to roll again to pick which kind of elf I am. All of them are such stereotypical elves that the only reason to have this many different breeds is for pure elf-wank.

Dwarfs! Are hearty and well-rounded and I'm-not-biased-at-all. Except for the fact that they are also bland and generically dwarven. Seriously, the biggest thing for dwarves in this setting is that they make good warriors.

Gnomes. Are Kender.

Yeah, that's all I'm gonna say.

Let's see how this roll goes: because, as this die falls, my fate is sealed.

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Why wouldn't you let it die OP? Why? Now I have to try to destroy all traces of this game once more and hunt you down and kill you.

>>23165116
>You see, a little over a year ago, /tg/ discovered a fantasy heartbreaker so godawful, so mind-numbing, so insanely ineffective, that I, being an idiot, had to try and make a character for.

Holy shit! I remember this!

I am glad to learn that the experience did not leave you to die of some lingering scar rent into your spirit.

Rolled 3, 4, 2, 1, 9, 6, 2, 9, 10, 4, 3, 2, 4, 3, 4, 4, 6, 3 = 79

>>23165503
Whew! okay! I'm human. That simplifies things. Because Humans have no ability adjustments

For comparison's sake: Elves adjust four stats, Dwarfs have SIX stat adjustments, and gnomes sit right in the middle with 5.

But... my next job is actually getting my stats... and how is that done?

Uhh... Page 11. "Setting Up The Character"

Allright, this is going to hurt a little. You see, PC's have 6 "outer" attributes (strength, intelligence, wisdom, dexterity, charisma and 'psychic strength'), and to determin the value of these stats, i have to roll 3d10, and then take the highest, for each individual stat.


But then 6 "inner" attributes (constitution, mental quickness, mental retention, agility, magnetism and psychic defense.), which exist independent of the outer attributes, and I have to roll 2d10 and take the highest for each of those six.

So, 12 attributes total, and 30 dice rolls required.

This first set of 18d10 is for my primary six stats...

Rolled 8, 6, 5, 3, 2, 8, 9, 9, 6, 4, 9, 6 = 75

>>23165718
Ohhboy... first problem with character generation: Stats are Swingy as hell.

>Strength: 4
>Intelligence: 9
>Wisdom 10
>Dexterity: 4
>Charisma: 4
>Psy Strength: 6

Well, with stats like those, I might make a halfway decent spell caster of some kind... a pity i'm letting the dice decide what role i take in this game...

Now, this roll is the "inner" attributes, which i guess is supposed to represent internal abilities that are not immediately evident or something, but the book never explains it, since agility and constitution are things people can normally see, whereas psychic strength is most definitely not... I dunno.. shutting up and rolling!

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>>23165116

Oh god I remember this! He went down Gate Of Babylon style.

Rolled 4

>>23165844
>constitution: 8
>mental quickness: 5
>mental retention: 8
>agility: 9
>magnetism: 6
>psychic defense.9

Okay! I'm rockin' some good psychic defenses, extremely high agility, given my dexterity is a 4, and i'm fairly magnetic for a guy who has a 4 charisma.

So, I've got my stats, let's move forward...

Oh, wait, it's time to choose a class, wait, sorry "Career". Because nothing says job stability like the manner in which you bust skulls open.

See, each class has it's own stat adjustment, oh, and there are Fifteen classes.

Those classes? Warrior, Knight, Champion, Forester, Barbarian, Sailor, Priesthood, Mage, Mindweaver, Thief, Assassin, Spy, Gypsy, Noble, and Bard.

a) Mindweaver, seriously? Proof that the Battlemind can evolve completely independent of 4e.
b) Gypsy is a class? I thought it was an ethnic group of nomadic Europeans.
c) Why call the class "priesthood" and not, I dunno, Priest, or Cleric? Every other class is a simple title.
d) Forester, and TV's Frank (too obscure?)

Anywho, I figure i have a 3/15 chance of getting a decent job...

>>23166047
>dose classes
Sweet jesus

>>23166047
>rolled a 4:

Oh gods, i should not have mocked the Forester class.

Okay, so what is a forester? Well, it's not described in character creation. It's also not in the first hundred pages... or the last 444 pages. To find out what a Forester is, exactly, write a letter to John Holland, C/O Somewhere in Canada...

Until he responds, i'm just going to guess that it's a lumberjack.

Yeah, a lumberjack, and that's OK.

So, foresters get a +1 Str, +1 int, +1 dex, -1 agi, -1 mag, -1 Psi Str.

I make the proper adjustments, and continue moving.

>Strength: 5
>Intelligence: 10
>Wisdom 10
>Dexterity: 5
>Charisma: 4
>Psy Strength: 5
>constitution: 8
>mental quickness: 5
>mental retention: 8
>agility: 8
>magnetism: 5
>psychic defense: 9

Oh, wait, next to my stat adjustments, ther's this little note:

"(magical stuff rolls: the Forester rolls even for all rolls *)"
>even for all rolls *)
>all rolls *)
>*

Aww crap. what's the asterisk...
Now, traditionally, with an asterisk, you put the notation at the bottom of the page, right? Well, not in this game! The author, instead, appended the asterisk to the end of the next page, where it lets us helpfully know: "These percentages are for set-up rolls only"

Splended.

So, it's time to move forward. We're up to page 14 of the character setup section, and we finally get to find oput what our stats do! No random rolls here, just layin' pipe to the next bit.

>>23166254
So, With my current stats: Here's what I get:
>Strength 5: No damage bonus
>Constitution 8: +1 to each life point die

Yes, You don't have hit points, you have Life Points. Abbreviated as L.P.s, yes, the periods are strictly necessary, and no, they do not increase your record collection.

>Intelligence 10: +2 languages
>Mental Quickness 5: No bonus on learning rolls.

Okay, I speak +2 languages... over how many base languages? I'm human, so, i should speak a common tongue, right? Well, quickly searching language in the .pdf file, we find rules for languages on page 31. All players begin the game speaking common! awesome. Except i don't actually start the game with these two additional languages known, i have to find someone willing to teach them to me, and it will take one "season" to learn a new language...
Oh gods, the seasons.
No, no, i'm gonna put off discussing time in Realms of Anastasia for another post. MOVING ON!

>Wisdom 10: +25% bonus to diplomatic rolls
>Retention 8: +1 to spell roll (memorized or deity granted)

First off: woohoo! +25% diplomacy is a godsend in this game. why? because every diplomatic skill check in this game has THIS built in:

>01 - 30%: backfires and either a battle or a war is started

Yeah, imagine that for a minute.

"Good morning neighbor."
"You Pig! Insulting me like that! This means War!"

So, I just shrunk my odds of accidentally starting an international incident from 30% down to just 5%!

And second: +1 spell roll sounds awesome... what's a spell roll?
>Searches
>no results.

Okay, so, we haven't finished defining what our stats do yet, and we've already found a hole in the rules.

The last time I found a hole in the rules, I got my leg torn off by a flying shield.

Well, since Retention has to do with memorization, it might mean that when a spellcaster rolls for extra spells, they can learn One MORE spell? I have no fucking idea, i'm not a spellcaster, so really, it's unimportant.

>>23166607
>Okay, so, we haven't finished defining what our stats do yet, and we've already found a hole in the rules.
>The last time I found a hole in the rules, I got my leg torn off by a flying shield.

You know, this is exactly why things like beta testing were invented.

Seriously, does nobody care about this? Fuck you, this board fucking sucks.

We are too busy waiting for you to post more

>>23166796
Well fuck off then. I can't be arsed to post anymore since you don't give me any attention.

>>23166607
>Dexterity 5: No bonus*
>Agility 8: No bonus to defense rolls, +10% to pickpocket rolls.

Ahh, this asterisk is placed fairly reasonably. apparently, whoever has the highest dexterity goes first. This kind of information should really be placed in, I dunno, the combat rules?

The exact passage here is as follows:

And as for my agility: Pick-pocketing is easier, and gets a bonus sooner, than personal defense?

Oh, wait, i found another typo.

>07 - 08: no bonus to defense rolls; +10% to pickpocket rolls
>08 - 10: +25% to defense rolls; +25% to pickpocket rolls

Huh, is that +0/+10, or +25/+25 for having an 8 agility?
You know what? I'm going to err to the side of awesome, and take the higher value, so I just got +25% defense, and +25% pick-pocketing.

Actually, what i'm really noticing, right now, is that most stats are pointless.

No, seriously, there's no functiona difference between having a 1 strength and having a 5 strength, both net +0 weapon damage.

The same is true for all other stats, 1-5 is nothing, 6+ is what gives bonuses.

So, functionally, that makes half of all people, who have 5's or lower, absolutely equal, for purposes of character creation.

And then, all the stat spreads have little variance to them: 1-5 is nothing, 6-8 is +1 9-10 is +2, and over 10 is +1/3 or +5%/1 or whatever.

Really, you could do this with d4's instead of d10's. roll 12d4, don't lose any in the carpet, and use the charts.

Urk... logic, interfering with my ability to finish explaining my stats. Move on move on!

>>23166762
HEY! That's not me! Goddamn it... I don;'t want a trip code damnit.

>>23166762
I'm enjoying it at least. I attribute the lack of response to a sort of stunned, horrified silence. It also seems weird posting in a character creation thread if you're not participating.

Also I can't imagine a Thursday afternoon being /tg/'s busiest time.

>>23166822
You are not me, goddamn troll. Let me suffer in public.

>>23166833
Alright, i've got a tripcode now. so >>23166762
>>23166822 can see themselves to the door. I'll continue the statistical breakdown without their interference.

Rolled 33

>>23166893
Alright, i'm sorry for that. we're still good? i love you all, seriously, I just have to get this out of my skull and I'm glad you're here to watch.

>Charisma 4 (nyet)
>Magnetisim 5: (Nada)

These stats govern "charm" and "attraction" which, in addition to being a type of quark and a universal gravitational constant, are basically two words that mean the same damn thing. If you are chartming, people will be attracted to you, why are they attracted to you? because you have charm.

Though, going through the .pdf, I come across the word "charm" only in reference to the spell of the same name (it's a basic mind-control spell, available in basic, bardic, godly, and massive varieties.)

Meanwhile, Attraction is actually about drawing others to your cause. Check out the attraction chart on page 54. If you roll a perfect 100%, you get 300 respondents. Note that this is not dependent on where you are, or what you are doing.

Standing on a rock in the middle of the desert? "I roll Attraction!" and suddenly, people just, come to your aid.

Okay, last pair of stats.

>Psi Str 5: No extra spell damage
>Psi Def 9: +25% to spell save rolls.

Okay, that's pretty cool. One of the worrying things about high Psychic strength is that it becomes a multiplyer for spell damage, instead of just an additive quality. A 10 Psi Str gives an x3 multiplier. Imagine a 1st level D&D player chucking out

So, really, my stats this far have been distressingly... average. But i'm okay with that, because next, we move, forward!

To the age modifiers.

Aww fuck.

Okay, Modifying for age: Humans, don't have listed maximum ages, or minimum starting ages, but they do get two stat changes, one when hitting 50, and the second when hitting 60. So, i'm rolling the dice. I figure 1d100 should be good for figuring out how old my character is.

Rolled 73

>>23167392
My Character is 33 years old! Absolutely nothing changes! But now, i get to roll on the social status chart: Which doubles as both a quicky character background (Covering every social status from Street Urchin to Nobility), and as a modifier to my current _flat_ roll to starting wealth. Now, the bulk of the chart is "middle class"... which, logically, should not exist in a fantasy setting, but i'm digressing. Rolling for my Human Forester's background.

Rolled 135

>>23167479
>73
Aww, so close! I just barely missed making it out of the "middle class" and passing in to the *upper* middle class, which would have given me a whopping +10% to finance, and +5% to magic stuff!

Oh well. This time, we move in to the... Oh crap.
I was hoping we could just slide around this, but, it was unavoidable.
I now have to roll for my birthday.

You see, In Realms of Atlantasia, there are five seasons: The season of Air, Season of Fire, Season Of Water, Season of Earth, And Season of Chaos.

Each Season is 80 "cycles", except chaos, which is 40 "cycles"

Oh yes, the season of chaos has a rigidly defined schedule.

Each day, i'm sorry, each cycle is composed of 20 "segments".
Each Segment is made up of 10 semi-segments.
Each Semi-Segment is the default length of a single round of combat.

I hope to hell you've just figured out the first major setting-breaking flaw of this game, right here.

If we assume standard, Dungeons and dragons time scale, where 1 round = 6 seconds: A "cycle" / day is only 20 minutes long.

Oh, and 360 of these "cycles" (that's the four 80-cycle seasons and the one 40-cycle season): the number that's supposed to be analogous to a year, but, for stupid reasons, is called a "rebirth"? It's about 5 days.

I'll just let that sink in.

Once again: BETA TESTING. or at the very least, proofreading.

Okay, this is one of the few places in the book where it tells you exact rules, so i'm going to have to stick to them, rigidly. First, I must roll a d5 to determine which season i was born in. Then, I must roll a d4 to determine which quarter of that season i was born in, and then i must roll a d20 to figure out which day exactly I was born on.

Which doesn't really work for the season of chaos, since it's only half as long as the rest of the seasons. So i guess you're supposed to just flip a coin there.

Orrr... i can just roll 1d360 here on 4chan, and then work it out for myself.

>>23165116
>You see, a little over a year ago
I-it's really been that long?

>>23165167
Man,I remember Fairy warband. We never finished!
>>23167844
Suuunriiiise, suuuunset!

Swiftly fly the years
One season following another
Laden with happiness and tears

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>>23167844
You are now aware that the rules kittens sticky has been up for almost two years.

>The Realms of Atlantasia

Oh man I missed these threads so much. Wasn't there a secret god that used an ability with a 1% survival chance while being a pacifist?

Rolled 21, 57, 87, 71, 68, 60 = 364

>>23167844
Yeah, it was 2011, early December, if that helps, when we first learned of this magnificent trainwreck.

>>23167879
>>23167880

Damnit, now i'm slightly more aware of my own inevitable mortality. Such is life.

>>23168009
Oh yeah, Par-Traxx. The author avatar. I'll get to him eventually.

>>23167802
>135

Okay, so by that number, I was born on the 55th day of the Season of Fire. Sounds awesome? Well, it's absolutely meaningless. The only place in the entire book where the season of fire is mentioned, is right here, page 17, in the description of time here in Atlantasia. No bonus skills, no elemental affinity, no special anything,. just. "it's a season".

Now, season of chaos? that gets it's own special spell casting chart, Multiple monsters only appear during the season of chaos, Hell, the season of chaos only exists because of Chaos dragons, whose wild mating rituals during that time period sweep away 30% of the population to other dimensions.

Yeah, I said it: 30% chance of members of a group being pulled into the wake of a chaos dragon mating ritual. Just extend that rule, which was stated as if it only applied to player character,s to the rest of the population, and we have a planet that faces apocalyptic destruction every 320 cycles. Season of chaos takes away certain magic relics, Hell, the biggest perk of the mindweaver class? That it's spell casting is unaffected by the season of chaos!

Well. no time to worry about such things. Now is the time to make a

>>23168056
"ahem, now is the time to make a fortune, by rolling on the SIX finance charts.

Well, that's what happens when you copy & paste without proofreading.

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Rolled 1, 5 = 6

What madness has consumed you, fool?!

You doom us all!

> Cast firebolt at Spider, the Steel Dwarf.

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Rolled 5, 7, 2, 2, 5 = 21

>>23168118

>Rolls dice behind the GM screen
"Your Firebolt hits Spider in the leg! Unfortunately, that leg was shorn off by a flying shield in the previous adventure. so it only succeeds in obliterating his peg-leg, and setting the stump on fire.

>>23168079
> 21, 57, 87, 71, 68, 60

So: My finances: unlike most games, which will happily give you a simple fistfull of gold pieces and point you to the nearest generic adventuring supply store, Atlantasia gives you Platinum! Gold! Silver! Copper! Precious Gems! and Jewels... and... wait, isn't a gem and a jewel the same thi- Oh screw it. we've got six tables, let's see what loot we got.

>21: 0 platinum chips.

Oh, that's right. Atlantasia doesn't use coins. they use "chips"... which are either crunchy and delicious, or useable as currency in Fallout New Vegas.

>57: 1d10 x 100 gold chips.
>87: 2d10 x 1,000 silver chips
>71: 1d10 x 5,000 copper chips
>68: 1d10 gems (value: 100-1,000 gold chips / gem)
>60: 1d4 jewels (value: 100-1,000 gold chips / jewel)

Oh I hope I roll high on the gold chips, because this brings us to the next issue of Atlantasia: After Time, the next big screwup is money. There's no currency conversion chart. While I would like to assume that 10 copper = 1 silver and 10 silver = 1 gold... it never. actually. says. As a matter of fact, the equipment section only serves to further confuse the value of things... but i'll get to that *after* i've figured out how much loot i have. These dice rolls? my gold, silver, copper, and gems.

>>23168056
>30% of the world is killed every 5 days
In 2011, the world bank released the population statistic of 6,973,738,433 persons on this earth.
If we went by the same season/time schedule as Realms of Antlasia, after the first 5 days 2,092,121,529 people would be dead, or running around in other planes, leaving 4,881,616,903 people to inherit the earth.
After 10 days, another 1,464,485,070 people would die, dropping the world population down to 3,417,131,832 people alive, barely halfing the worlds population.
After 30 days, or one month, there would be only 1,172,076,218 people alive in the world, and the death toll would be at 5,801,662,215, almost six BILLION people dead in the course of a month.
After 90 days, or three months, there would only be 16,223,043 living humans on this earth, and the death toll due to horny dragon fucking would be at 6,957,515,390, almost SEVEN BILLION PEOPLE DEAD in a period of 3 MONTHS.
Let's fast forward to the end of the first earth year, shall we?
After 12 months, or 365 days, or a total of 73 dragonfucking seasons, the world population would be at only 0.07%* OF ONE PERSON LEFT ON THE PLANET, WITH A DEATH TOLL OF 6973738432.93 PEOPLE.
AND THAT'S JUST ONE FUCKING YEAR
*Calculations may be inaccurate since I lost count a few times.

>>23168321
Wasn't one of the features bragged about in the last thread currency exchange? Also, good stuff, Spider. I am approve.

Rolled 375, 51, 420, 591, 355 = 1792

>>23168392
Luckily, the population of atlantasia is protected by Tam-Paxx! Or Car-Traxx, or whatever his name is, actually don't care enough to look up thread and see what I wrote.

>>23168416
Actually, last thread, I bitched about it too, I just felt like revisiting some classic material. It's been over a year, i'm good.

>>23168321
>500 GC, 9,000 SC, 10,000 CC, 5 gems, valued 100-1000
Well, the system this far suggests that each gem should be worth 1d10 x 100, buuuut... i'm gonna roll 5 d900, for shits and giggles, then add 100 to each.

Oh, the difference between Gems and Jewels: Jewels might be *magical*... as in, they might have a spell inside them. Except magical jewels are worth, on average, a metric arseload, so the only way that you get a magic jewel is if you roll EXACTLY 100, and then you have to randomly roll for your jewel to be worth between 5,000 and 50,000 gold. But that won't really help you, since enchantments are so ridiculously expensive... they are completely beyond affordability. A human asking an elf for an enchantment? Expect to pay triple. TEN FOLD if he suspects you've ever insulted another elf, anywhere. On the plus side, magic schools could probably make some serious dough by enchanting jewels.

Rolled 1

>>23168596
Okay, take those numbers, add 500, and I pull in another 2,292 more Gold Chips worth of loot.

So, to save some time, I'll just cash those in, and add it to my existing 500 gold chips, giving me a more respectable 2,792 gold chips.

Reminds me: rolling 1d4 for number of jewels.

Rolled 174

>>23168728
Damn, okay, just one jewel. Well, it's still worth somewhere between 100 and 1,000 gold. rolling another d900 Maybe it'll be halfway decent.

Rolled 76, 61, 69, 47 = 253

>>23168751
And adding 274 to my total, yields me a more respectable 3,066 starting gold coins. I swear, i will try to use them well.

Am I done rolling for my starting loot? can i go buy equipment?

Noooooope!

Now I get to roll for starting magic items! I've got perfectly flatly even stats here, no modifications for our 33-year old forester. let's see how it goes.

Rolled 2

>>23168807
>Magic weapon: 76: ... "of damage" (Weapon inflicts +1-+6 damage)
>Magic Armor 61: ... "of protection" (armor adds +5-+30% defense)
>Ring: 69: 1 roll on the magical ring chart
>Item: 47: 0 magic items.

Okay, awesome. Last time, all i got was a ring of brain-shielding, that did nothing much, this time, weapon, armor, and a ring! Oh, wait, we have to figure out how much my "... of damage" and my "... of protection" are for... this is 1d6 for the "of damage"

Rolled 19, 10 = 29

>>23168885
So, whatever weapon i get now does +2 whole damage, flat. that's awesome for a starting character with a 5 strength.

... and here's 2d30, we'll take the first one over 5%, and use that as my armor of protection's value.

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>>23168596
>Luckily, the population of atlantasia is protected by Tam-Paxx! Or Car-Traxx, or whatever his name is,
So you're saying I went full autism for nothing?

>>23168986
For what it's worth, I thought it was funny.

Rolled 29

>>23168926
So, my armor is +19% defense. Also very good, since i doubt foresters will get to wear heavy armor.

I guess the last thing to do is roll up my magic ring...

uh...

hang on...

where the hell is the magic ring chart?

i've searched "Magical ring", which yielded only a few results, all in treasure descriptions, I've searched just "ring" which is hitting on nearly every single page of this 545 page document...

Oh gods.

Okay, i found it, on page 192. "Special Ring Table". there are 100 different special magical rings. I'mma gonna roll.

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Rolled 13

>>23168986

I thought it was funny as hell, just trading quips :)

>>23169128
And it yielded "Of true sight".

... no explanation. just... of true sight.

Okay, what does that mean?

Ctrl+F

Okay, after numerous false positives, on page 250, that's 58 pages away from where I got the ring, I learn that magic items that are "of true sight" are created by khiet-sheen, which i guess are like, priests? It contains 1-20 true sight spells... oh Christ, I have to find that now.... and it's worth 600 Gold points- I mean Chips. I'll roll 1d20 to figure out how many of this spell I've got.

Oh hey, searching for "true sight" through the document? Yeah, on page 509, invisibility trumps true sight. isn't that a little backwards?

Okay, True Sight, on page 331.

>"Khiet-Sheen's version of this spell is two-fold. First it allows the Priest(ess) to determine if a target is being truthful or not and secondly, it enables the caster to see anything covered by an invisibility spell (or item that does the same thing) except for those cast by Dragons or Mindweavers. The duration of this spell is as follows:"

... so... it's a visual lie detector? The fuck? Does it just put a big "LYING" sign over their skull?

Well, How long does it last for?
lv. 1 - 10: 2ss

TWO TURNS? What the fu- that is completely useless! two turns?

Turn one: Hey look! there's the invisible guy who isn't a mindweaver or dragon! Ha! ha! Charge!
Turn two: I'm next to you! now i will attack!
Turn three: and he's invisible again, why is there a knife in my back?

*as is the way of engineers dealing with dead ringer spies.*

okay, so I have 1d20 castings of this spell. maybe it'll work out for me, maybe i should just hock the ring.

Rolled 62

>>23169406
And now, I have found out that i completely screwed up my ring acquisition.

Because: two pages earlier, there is a chart that is just labeled "rings".

Not "magic rings", just "rings" on page 191, over 100 pages away from where we were first required to roll for our magic items

I now need to roll 1d100, to then roll on one of five other charts OR roll on the "special rings" table that i just rolled on, and spent a post bitching about.

Rolled 19

>>23169491
Okay, table 3... and... Huh... just found another typo.

This chart goes from 01 to 99. There's no result for 100.

Strange, but, given quality control in this book, i'm not surprised. If i roll 100 by some miracle, then i'll take that ring of true seeing.

Rolled 1

>>23169525
...of magic resistance. Well, off to page 250

>5-30% resistance to 1 magic.

To one magic? How many different kinds of magic are there? Urgh, Rolling a d6, multiply by 5 to find my magic resistance.%

>>23169575
Pretty useless ring you have now.

Rolled 2

>>23169575
Okay, 5% magic resistance, to what one type? i'll figure it out sooner or later.

Urgh, i've been making this character for four hours now, let me review what i've got so far.

>Name: ?

I... er... i don't have a name for him... he feels very... blah. middle class forester with nothing really special about him, yet.

>Race: Human
>Career: Forester

>Str: 5 Con: 8
>Int: 10 Men Q: 5
>Wis: 10 Ret: 5
>Dex: 5 Agi: 8
>Cha: 4 Mag: 5
>Psi Str: 5 Psi Def: 9

+1 L.P. per die, +2 Langages, +25% diplomatic rolls, +1 spell roll, +25% defensive rolls, +25% pick-pocketing rolls, +25% spell save rolls

>age: 33
>Born: 55th day, Season of Fire

>3066 gc, 9,000 sc, 10,000 cc
>Magic weapon "... of damage" (+2)
>Magic armor: "Of protection" (+19%)
>Magic Ring: "Of magic resistnace" +5% (school?)

Okay... summary over. we're nowhere near done, hell, we haven't even looked at our actual class skills yet. I'm next going to figure out what school of magic we resist:

There are SIXTEEN different sources of magic, that's including both 8 arcane and 8 divine sources. so, I've got a 5% resistance to the magic of ONE of these schools, Rolling 1d16 to figure this out.

>>23169870
>he feels very... blah.

Chuck Woodsplinter?

>>23169870
Jack Johnson.

Rolled 42

>>23169870
>Second school. Okay, well, that's the school of fire.

Hrm. born in the season of fire, resistant (slightly) to the school of fire...

Hmm.. okay. well, i think that's done. So, what's next?

Next, we go back, from the magic item charts in the mid 200's, to page 24: Career Talents!

I get ONE roll on the career talent... my possible talents are: animal healer! Herbalist! Tracker! and... Weather Predictor.

So, I could be a Disney princess... or a quiet healer, Dog the Bounty Hunter, or... Al Roker?

Oh gods of RNG, bless this roll, for yea, it shall suck.

>>23170041
Weather Predictor rocks.

>>23170095
Only in mouse guard, where hailstones are as large as you are. In a game like this, you would roll, and have the GM tell you what the weather would be, not the other way around.

>>23170041
>herbalist (+40% to knowing healing & food-source plants)

Okay. Alright. so, i guess i'm a survivalist, who heals people with natural herbs.

So what do healing herbs do?
>Ctrl+f "Herbalist"
2 results, 1 is the forester, the other is the gypsy
>Search "Healing herbs"
0 results
>Search "Healing"
Too many results, all of which deal with magical healing, and compounding multipliers (seriously, there's a crown that multiplies your healing by 3, and a skill that doubles it, and magic items that double and triple healing everywhere.

Okay, I'm giving up on that. I can't even find if there's any section in this book about natural healing, the kind you would get from rest or just downtime. Hell, several classes have access to self-L.P.-restoring abilities, (Barbarians heal 1 "Life Point" per "Semi-Segment" while enraged, Champions have an inate skill that restores 1d10 of their own life points, once per "cycle".

There's no specific rules for medicinal herbs at all. If you are going to include a skill, you have to include the Logical end result of said skill too. If there's herbalisim in a game, I want herbalisim to be able to treat diseases, or increase healing time. I don't want it to be "oh yeah, and then the GM makes up some shit about what plants you find". That's lazy on the part of the game designer. Hell, even just a little random chart of common herbs in some environments, and their special effects would be nice. You wrote a hundred-entry chart for magical rings, could you throw me a bone and make 1d6 herbal remedies?

Ugh... such sloppy design!

Alright, we're moving on now: To Resistances!

All players have a basic magic resistance of 10%, this gets augmented by a couple of things, luckily, i don't have to roll for any of them.

Rolled 22, 20, 33 = 75

>>23170342
>Okay, my Psychic Defense gives me an extra +15% magic resistance... they could have put this in the description of Psychic Defense instead of, I don't know, sticking it nine pages later, but i'm just being bitchy.

>25% magic resistance (30% vs School of Fire, With Ring)

There's also resistances to fire, electricity, heat, cold and undead... wait... Fire... and Heat.... are two separate elements...Nnngggg...

Okay, Moving on, I have a 5% resistance to each of those, it can ONLY be augmented by magic items. So no takebacks.

>Resist Fire, Electricity, Heat, Cold, Undead: 5%

And against mental attacks, I use my Psychic Defense, Which according to this chart, My 9 gives me 20%.
>Resist Mental Attacks: 20%

Kinda surprised they don't use, say, constitution to resist heat and cold, or something... you know, like a fortitude save vs. environmental effects... Oh, hey, we're done with resistances! and moving on to... weapon proficiencies.

Oh goody.

So here's how weapon proficiencies work.

First, I have to roll a d100. If I roll EXACTLY 100, i'm ambidexterous. If i DON'T roll 100, then i have to roll 2 more d100, to determine what percentage of handedness i am, in each hand. I then must list the proficiency with my own hands, on the front page of my character sheet, under L.H. and R.H.

I am not kidding.

Oh, and how well I use my own hands, which is not determined by agility, or dexterity, but by this, singula- er- triad of dice rolls, could mean as much as +/-10% to my to-hit number.

>>23170571
>20% ability with left hand
>33% ability with right hand
We carpel tunnel now.

Rolled 5, 7 = 12

>>23170571
>Left Hand: 20, Right hand: 33
>Screams Internally.

Okay, So, i'm right handed, and my nickname is "butterfingers."
Because of this shitty roll, I get these fantastic little modifiers.

>Right Hand: -3%
>Left Hand: -6%.

Let's move on to to-hit calculation:

Now, all characters start with a flat +10% to-hit... after my penalty for being unlucky, I'm down to a +7% / +3%. My low strength of 5 gives me a 0% bonus. My low dex, also 5, gives me a 0% bonus.

>To-hit: +7% / +3%

Alright. I'm not totally dead yet. I've still got some life left in my 33-year-old body. Let's see about my defenses.

Now, everyone starts with a base defense of 10%, and my Agility, which is, thankfully, an 8, gives me a +15% bonus! kicking me up to 25%! Plus my Magic armor... of protection, kicks up another 19%, giving me a total of 44% Defense before i've even bought my first leather boot. Mental quickness also would give a bonus, but since my mental quickness is 5... yeah, you guessed it, +0%..

Defense: 44%

Now, i'm skipping a bit about special magic-user calculations (vbecause, once again, i'm not a wizard) and getting straight to the next bit: Life Point calculation. As a forester, I get 2d8 + my constitution bonus at first level! Thankfully, i have a decent constitution, so i'll be getting 2d8+2 Hit- er, LIfe Points!

>>23170753
Okay, 14 Life Points... that;'s okay at first level.

Next bit is about languages, I know one, but don't have time to learn any more. so I'll just stick with common.

And finally, we reach the armory. Time to go shopping...

Or is it?

See, i'm a forester, is it okay for me to just spend my... (checks ginormous sack of loot) 3066 gold chips, 9,000 silver chips, and 10,000 copper chips so rashly? Or are there some... restrictions?

On page 257, i get my answer... Nope! no restrictions at all. But... i do get some more nifty class abilities.

>Weapon Proficiency: 1 main proficiency.

Okay, you know how D&D treats "weapon proficiency" as "you can use this group of weapons"? Well, Realms of Atlantasia treats "weapon proficiency" as "You can ONLY use this ONE weapon.

Proficiency is literally how good you are with one weapon, not access to that weapon, or it's weapon group. Everyone can pick up any weapon they like, but they only get their proficiency with whatever the first weapon they lay their hands on is.

BUT, you gain more proficiencies as you level up. Making more weapons available to you! Actually, that kind of makes sense in the "trained from birth" sort of way, a sword and an axe are different besasts after all... so, you probably expect to pick up more weapons quickly, as daggers and shortswords and swords all flow into each other, right?

Wrong. I have to wait until i hit level 25 before I get another shot at the whole lefty / righty roll-off, to see if i'm MORE "proficient" with whatever new weapon I pick up.

Level 25. It's only 120,000 experience points away.

Oh, if you are wondering, level 2 is 1,500 experience points distant. I could, conceivably, make it, if i defeated an enemy, and rolled really well on my treasure table.

Oh yes, treasure is worth experience. How delightfully 1st edition. Only you don't have to give away the treasure to get this experience, just receiving it is enough.

>>23171077
I'm digressing, hard, and I really want to get this done before midnight. So, what other specials do i get?

Well, Lucky me, I have that old Ranger, I'm sorry, Forester standard: 2 attacks per round.

Now, this is actually entirely independent of whatever weapon i'm using. at no point does it say "2 melee or 2 bow-shots per round" so I COULD use a crossbow twice per turn.

Also, I like how they use the word "round" here, instead of "Semi-Segment". Makes me feel a little more secure... Except they then stick on the abbreviation 2/s.s. just to spite me.

I also gain the following laundry list of skills:

>Tracking +5%, Know # in group + 5%, Communicate with animals +1%, Communicate with trees +2% Predict Weather +5%, and Find water +10%.

I'm sorry, Communicate with Trees?... It really bothers me that, as a forester, I have a better shot of talking to trees than I do animals. And that I'm FAR better at finding water than I am at Anything else.

I wonder if diplomacy with a tree could start a war...

Rolled 1

>>23171200
Another funny thing: Know # in group:

>A forester stands in the middle of the superdome, and stares up into the stands at the super bowl crowd.
>Rolls well.
>"There are 70,435 of you."

>forester looks at his own group of an elf, a dwarf, and himself.
>rolls poorly.
>There are nine of us.

Okay, Back up to the store Now, I don't want to overspend, but, at the same time, I am fairly weak, so that limits my armor and weapons choices.

Oh, I should mention: Armor Prices are on page 32. Armor descriptions, which entirely consist of Durability and defensive bonus %, are on page 46. Because, why make a single, easily read and referenced chart, when you can just put all the information fourteen pages away?

I'll start off with a Steel Helm (25 durability: +3% defense), Then Studded Leather chest protector armor (Durability 20, +10%). I'm skipping the shield, right now, and getting steel bracers (durability 15, +3%) and steel shin guards (20, 5%) and, after that little spending spree, I'm down to 1,216 Gold Chips, and i need to save some to buy a weapon.

I'll make the Steel Helm into my enchanted magic armor, since it is, by far, the most durable of my lot.

Actually, if i really want to munchkin out on my defenses: having a CLOAK gives a +2% defense (almost as much as my bracers) and it only costs 85 copper chips. So into the shopping cart it goes.

Also: fun things you learn while poking around in the file, any magically enchanted item has it's durability increased by 10. now isn't that nice for my Steel Helm of Protection, which is now more durable than a Crown?

Urk... gotta keep movng. Only a few more to get through...
Because of my shitty strength (5, perfectly average) i'm restricted from using most weapons,. So i only have 14 weapons to chose from. In the spirit of frienship and cooperation, i'm rolling for it.

Rolled 12

>>23171711
>Weapon #1: Throwing Knives (3) requires 2 dexterity.

Oh you are shitting me... at 75 GC for 3 lousy little knives, i'm going to go bankrupt buying enough to kill anything. The do a masterful 1d4 damage.

Of course, i can toss two at a time. So that just means i need to buy a lot more of the suckers.

Actually, i think weapons & armor is enough for this character. I'm just going to run him through a random encounter, so how many throwing knives will my remaining 1,216 Gold Chips buy?
>16 sets of 3 knives = 48 knives.

Okay, 48 throwing knives, at durability 8, able to inflict 1d4 damage each. This is it ladies and gents, Last time, i got taken out by thrown objects, now it's my turn to do some flinging. AAre you ready for us to start making the reciprocal random encounter?

>>23171802
Okay, there are 20 different random encounter charts in the book, and that makes this next job easy: rolling 1d20 for which table i'm going to use.

Oh, if you're curious, encounter tables include locations like city (day and night) Jungle (day and night) Saringetti... yes, i'm not kidding, Saringetti is an environmental type to our author, and not a location in Africa. That much is clear.

So, where will out 1d20 roll take us?

Rolled 14

>>23171954
Typos make fools of us all.

Rolled 27

>>23171966
It's a SWAMP encounter! This is fan-fucking-tastic news. Why? Because swamps have NO NPCs on the encounter chart! First time, i rolled an encounter against a hoarde of 15 level 20 warriors escorting a merchant caravan. Then i rolled a single level 15 wizard who could vaporize me with an errant glance, here, all i have to worry about is some goblins and maybe a "mossman" whatever that is... i can practically smell my survival chances improving! Rolling d100 for exactly what patheric, easily killed monster i fight...

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Rolled 4, 2, 6, 2 = 14

>>23172040
27: Troll (4-24)
...
I only have 48 knives...

Ohhh, this is gonna suck...

Okay, how many trolls do i encounter. 4-24, that's 4d6 of them, right? I have never prayed for a roll this low before... maybe if captcha eats some of my dice...

Rolled 88

>>23172101
>Encountering 14 trolls
>As a first level PC.

Well, it was nice knowing you guys.

Okay, i'm not completely doomed. Just... most excessively doomed.

Alright. I need a scenario... once where I can beat a troll... just one. or... um two...What are their combat stats?

>Speed: 150' per s.s.

Holy shit that's fast! that's like... they actually have a move speed... wow. You know who doesn't have a move speed? Me! People in general don't have movement rates! So, either I'm much slower than it, or move at roughly the same speed, or maybe I run faster, i don;t know. except moving 150' per round is terrifying.

Okay, well, maybe these trolls don't have Regen, maybe they're more like the rock trolls of-

>Trolls have an amazing regenerative ability (if an arm, or leg, is cut off, they will grow another within 5ss and the cut off appendage will grow another troll within 20ss) but are very susceptible to fire (which is the only true way of killing a troll).

Aww fuck. Okay, well, they don't regain Life Points, just limbs. So, i'm good for that, I hope. I don't plan on cutting off limbs, just poking a lot of little holes. Oh hey, what about weapons?

>Trolls will use whatever weapon(s) available but if they have no weapon they will use their claws and fangs.

Okay, so they probably just do the claw / claw thing, right?

>Attacks: 3/ss

Fuck, they can attack faster than me.

>To Hit: 36%

Aaand they are much more accurate.

>Defense: 30% + armor

But i have slightly better defense.

>30% immune to electricity, only fire can truly kill a troll

Okay, so basic resistances. I bet i could get som poisonous herbs and-

>100% immune to poisons

Oh fuck you. Well, still, it can't be that hard to put down, what's it's life total?

>L.P.s: 200

...
Okay,

now, If every one of my throwing knives hit, and inflict maximum damage... I'll STILL only do 192 HP damage.

And I'll be out of throwing knives.

>>23172338

>Physical Attacks: weapon damage + 3
>fangs: 1d10
>claws: 1d6/claw

Damnit damnit damnit... He could, concievably, kill me in one turn with a claw / claw / bite.well, does he at least have any good loot after i kill him?

>25% chance for magical weapons, armor and items
>05% chance for magical rings

Okay. I don't think there's anyone else in the thread tonight, so i'm just going to leave this final notice here:

As bad as this game is: I don't hate it.

Yes, it's frustrating, it's like a dinosaur, something from another era, it's full of typographical errors, bad spelling, and questionable balance choices. But, damn it, Someone TRIED. and i can respect that.

Hell, the author wrote that he had been working on it for 19 years. And it shows. Because some of the ideas here, CLEARLY sounded good to a 12-year-old who had just discovered D&D, but would definitely not pass roster for the 31 year old who decided to publish.

If you ever decide to get off your ass, and make that RPG fantasy heart breaker you've always dreamed of? I will support you every single step of the way. But, please, for the love of god, hire an editor, and play test it with everyone who is willing to play test it. And then, as you play test, listen to them. if they cannot find it in the book, or if you have to repeatedly find something for them, or make rulings for them? Then it's your responsibility to write down those rulings, and put them in logical places in the book.

Oh, and for the love of god: WRITE AN INDEX.

I'm tired I've been writing Jack Johnson here for seven hours, and only just finished him. It's time for me to hit the sheets. G'night folks.

>>23172504

Oh, for anyone who wants it: 7 hours of character creation, and over a hundred dice rolls, produced... this

>Name: Jack Johnson
>Race: Human
>Career: Forester

>Str: 5 Con: 8
>Int: 10 Men Q: 5
>Wis: 10 Ret: 5
>Dex: 5 Agi: 8
>Cha: 4 Mag: 5
>Psi Str: 5 Psi Def: 9

>age: 33
>Born: 55th day, Season of Fire

>16 gc, 9,000 sc, 9,915 cc
>Magic weapon "... of damage" (+2)
>Magic Ring: "Of magic resistnace" +5% (school of fire)

>Right Hand: -3%
>Left Hand: -6%

>To-hit: +7% / +3%

>Defense: 67% (10 base + 15 agility + 23 normal armor, + 19 magic armor)

>14 Life Points.

>+1 L.P. per die, +2 Langages, +25% diplomatic rolls, +1 spell roll, +25% defensive rolls, +25% pick-pocketing rolls, +25% spell save rolls, herbalist (+40% to knowing healing & food-source plants), Tracking +5%, Know # in group + 5%, Communicate with animals +1%, Communicate with trees +2% Predict Weather +5%, and Find water +10%. 2 attacks per round

>Equipment:
>Steel Helm Of Protection (25 durability: +3% defense + 19% defense enchantment, +10 Durability)
>Studded Leather chest protector armor (Durability 20, +10%)
>Steel bracers (durability 15, +3%)
>Steel shin guards (20, 5%)
>Felt Cloak: (durability 2, +2%)
>48 throwing knives of damage (1d4 + 2 magical enhancement)

>>23172504

I really enjoyed reading this. but you should try and fight something appropriate. just because <_<

>>23172603 Maybe, if this thread is up tomorrow morning.

>>23172555
Look what i found! A table which shows some relative price ranges! From this we can deduce that 100 S.C. is 1 G.C.

Also if you search herb you will find a list of herbs, their price and what they do.

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>>23173734
oh wait forgot picture