File: 1349902071522.png-(956 KB, 1653x2338, skeleton art pt 2.png)

http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/21044136/

Previous thread.

Pet the horse and chat with Gerlad on the trip back to our town.

>>21071586

"Gerald. My best friend happens to be a giant spider. If you flip out and try to lay even a finger on him you end up worse than Big Bubba. He died painlessly"

>>21071654
You mount the horse and give it a little pet to calm it down.

On the ride back you and Gerald make pleasant conversation about nothing.

Eventually the conversation turns to you.

>"So why exactly are you killing these guys? I haven't heard about their activities."

"Need to do it for my boss."

>"About that, are you sure that's what he wants?"

"Can't see why not. With no one else threatening him with magical destruction, he'll have all the time in the world to read his drivel. And it's in my bones, gotta have something to kill."

>>21071677

You explain the situation with Stumbles to Gerald.

>"Got it, don't hurt the Spiders. What could you do that was worse than Buba, though?"

You tell him of your watery grace ability. He shudders.

>"I almost drowned once, worst thing in my life. And your God just gave that to you? As a weapon? That's fucked up."

The conversation makes the miles fly by, before sunset you're already seeing the manor in the distance. A little while after that you're home.

What do you do?

Go see stumbles and Rebecca.
Also check on the hornets and see how their nest building is going

>>21071747
This. Give them the trinkets too.
Also report back to Eric. Inform him you felt really shitty about killing the poor guy and that there was nothing worth looting.

>>21071725

If Rebecca asks us what we killed we just say "An illusionist." We aren't in the mood for her idealism.

We should get Stumbles to weave some kind of tapestry of our adventures.

>>21071747
You tell Gerald to make himself comfortable in the scholarly room while you see your friends and family.

You enter Stumbles' workshope, and he comes skittering across the floor and hugs you in a greeting.

>"I am glad you're back, Daniel."
He tells you before going back to his workbench.

>"So did you kill more civilizations or gods?"
Rebecca asks.
You hand her the trinket box and tell her you stopped a crazy illusion wizard who had killed too many innocents.

She concedes, and leaves it alone.

You tell them that you have a guest from your travels, and that they should come and meet him. Stumbles says he needs to get changed into his formal attire. Rebecca agrees with him.

You return to the scholarly room.

Gerald has made himself comfortable in one of Erik's great leather armchairs.

He's found a bottle of brandy from somewhere. You can just read the bottling date. 400 year ago.

Soon enough Stumbles, Meryl and Rebecca all come and join you, Stumbles and Rebecca wear matching attire, plain black and white suits, both form fitted for her size, and Stumbles' thorax. Meryl is in her gardening cloths, and has dirt all over the knees.

After an hour of conversation Erik wanders in, looks around, spots Gerald.

>"Good evening, esteemed guest. I see Daniel has brought another one home. I don't think I'll have many rooms left soon..."

Gerald says he's only staying for the night, and Erik tells him it was just a joke.

What do you do?

>>21071846
OH, ask Stumbles how the father situation is going. We never talked to the girl either.

>>21071866
The girl? Rebecca?

>"Meryl is getting ready to lay the eggsh, Daniel, shesh made a burrow in one of the hillsh around the manor."

Damn that's going to be creepy to see.

What do you do?

>>21071900
No, Meryl. We never asked her how she felt about being a mother. We've hardly spoken to her at all.
Maybe just see how she's settling in?

And report to Erik.

>>21071900
Marvel at the possibilities of such things. And then wonder what we might have unleashed on the lands.

>>21071900
report in to erik, and check on the hornets

>>21071960

A swarm of adorableness of course!

>>21071941
Meryl is still a bit nervous talking to you, know who you are and what you do. But she still answers.

>"I am very excited, my species are very big on children and families. I've wanted one ever since sentience in Beric's castle."

>>21071960
An army of spider/mantis tailors. A truly scary idea.

>>21071964
You talk to Erik in private out in the halls, as to not spoil the mood of the evening.

>"I know what you did, Daniel, I could feel a great release of magic returned to the aether when you did your duty. I know you must feel bad, but you have to know, it was right."

Erik gives you that little solace, then returns to the little party.

You check in on the hornets before returning.

From outside your room you can hear the buzzing.

When you open the door, you're not sure what you're seeing.

It seems the hornets have cross bred with bees. The walls are covered in sticky honeycomb, and so is the ceiling. The entire room is one massive hive.

What do you do?

>>21072005

Look at all this honey we can't eat!

Man, having no taste sucks.

>>21072005
Order some of the beehyrbids into the chest cavity. Perhaps get some kind of lining so they don't get honey everywhere.

Who's left to kill?

>>21072093
You can't eat it, but Rebecca, Stumbles, Meryl, Gerald, and Stumbles' children all can.

>>21072108
You order some of the soldiers into your ribcage. The oblige their deal and nest themselves, waiting for action.

What do you do?

>>21072132
Check up with the folks in town, see if anything interesting happened in your absence.

Check the list of targets still on this continent.

>>21072132
lets go find our apprentice/backup dancers

>>21072132

Lets check out Team Frienemy!

>>21072132
Time to do some home improvement, and check in on Mort. We should see about our apprentices as well

>saries agramaze
Does the mansion need a maze? I sense potential

>>21072156
On this continent there's only John the Battlemage. You'll find him in any chaotic warzone.

>>21072164

You head to the town, but tell your friends that you're heading off on business and not to wait up. Everyone but Erik is drunk and promptly says goodbye.

You find the two boys, Steve and Gary, at Mort's club.

Steve is asking Mort to get some of his skeletal band to till his fields while he trains with you. Mort is refusing until you ask him, and he immediately sends a few over to work the fields.

Your two apprentices, Steve the farmer and Gary the merchant's son, are both enjoying cold cider and talking about future glory.

You ask them if they've been training, and they show you their muscle development. They can't show their improved blade skills without Mort kicking them out, and promise to show you tomorrow.

You don't say anything about the drinking, as the career entails heavy alcohol intake. They'll need to build some resistance, and Farmer McGavin's cider can strip the rust from a sword in seconds.

>>21072173
They are on the other side of the country seeing to personal matters at the moment. But I reckon you'll see them again.

>>21072219
Meryl has already planted sapplings, they should be grown by August.

What do you do?

>>21072244

Do we know John's preferred spells, fire, ice ect? And is there a chaotic war going on at the moment?

>>21072244
Engage in some intel gathering. We need shazbot to do.

>>21072244
lets ask mort about anything interesting going on in the town, and also see if he knows anything about the battlemage

>>21072299
There's always a war going on somewhere. As for John, he's not an elemental, he's a battlemage. He uses his magic to empower his combat skills, like speed and strength. When he enters a battle with his warhammer all sides turn on him, or things get messy, fast.

So far of all the magic users, John has the highest body count.

>>21072328
>>21072319
Everyone and their mother knows about John the Bloody, he's like a campfire story.

The story goes that a knight challenged a warlock to single combat, and killed the warlock, who bet his power on the fight.

John's mind wasn't prepared for all that new power, and snapped, only seeking a glorious end in battle like so many of his brothers in arms.

When he was just Sir John he would fight with a maul that could crack most chest plates. But after he gained his power he forged a great hammer made of granite, and armour from the same.

He naturally gravitates to any battle that's particularly bloody and enters the frey, taking no side and discriminating none from a brutal end.

What do you do?

>>21072244

Rebecca's drunk?

>>21072366
lets try and figure out if anyone in town knows where he is now

>>21072431
A nip of gin, no harm, just social grease.

>>21072439
>"I thought 'e'd be at Kerm."
>"Well, there's that little war of attrition between the west and east churches. Each one's saying they're the true church, and all heretics must perish. If he hasn't shown up, he damn well will soon."
>"Could be out north, in the frosts. There's a raiding party like nothing anyone's ever seen moving around, plundering settlements and killing everyone."

Three different ideas, everything else just repeats these.

What do you do?

>>21072466

I hope he's in the frosty lands. We don't need protection from cold but he has to wear a big fluffy coat or use some magic. And magic keeping him warm is magic not making his hammer nastier!

He probabley has enough magic to be warm and smashy but every little helps! Plus ice is frozen water! Hydra loves water!

>>21072526
That's some good lateral thinking there.

What do you do?

>>21072538
I think we should go check out the raiding party idea

Go to the frosty lands. Also bring our siege bow.

Maybe we should get some kind of insulation for the hornet/bees before we leave though

>>21072639
You think that north in the Frosts would be the best idea, as those cultures tend to value a death in battle more than most. John the Bloody would be well at home there.

>>21072645
It's settled, you are heading north first thing tomorrow. And you're bringing your siege bow.

You return to the manor and find everyone red faced and laughing, you allow them to their festivities, you have other things to attend.

You leave a note in the main hall detailing where you've gone, and how you'll be back when it's over.

You tell them about the horbees, too, and to grab some honey.

The road north is covered in forests and trees, so it would be a good idea to join up with a group that knows the way. The Trader's rest is where all traveling merchants settle for the night.

What do you do?

>>21072671
The Horbees generate their own heat just by being alive, they actually produce heat upto 80 degrees Celsius if they group together.

>>21072692

Go to The Traders and ask for a tour guide. There's a jarful of honey if he agrees!

>>21072745
this, but if no one seems interested, dance the dance of persuasion

>>21072745
Yeah, honey or our services as a professional bodyguard. You wouldn't like to meet up with a white dragon or a frostling raiding party, oh no.

>>21072745
You enter the Trader's rest, and ask about anyone heading north. There's an arms trader, going to a stronghold to deliver a shipment of sword and armour, and he'd be glad to have some protection along the way. The honey only sweetens the deal as it doesn't rot. Ever. And'll make the cold nights a bit better.

You've joined a trade caravan that's leaving at 8 O'clock in the morning.

What do you do?

>>21072803
Check out the local stores for cantrips and minor items. Also maybe a cloak white as snow to hide and backstab. Not very honorable, but smart.

>>21072803
go to the lads, take them to the mansion, have them show you their skills, show them new skills and techniques to practice, and to perfect their current ones
set out harder exercises, dont want them plateauing
pick up some new equipment to replenish used ones, and make sure that we have more than enough siege arrows

>>21072803
Begin sidequest to find a dragons bacculum for use as a warhammer

>>21072848
All the stores are closed due to the time. Only Stumbles makes white clothing in the area, and he's drunk in the manor house.

>>21072877
The two apprentices are drinking in Mort's club, and wont be of any use other than amusement. But you do set out some harder exercises and training schemes for them.

The blacksmith that you buy your siege arrows from always has a bundle of them in his workshop waiting for you. You put down the money and take them.

It's all in good faith.

>>21072939

Dragons haven't been on the same continent you're on in hundreds of years. You could go out much further east, but you'd lose John the Bloody.

What do you do?

>>21072803

>The honey sweetens the deal

:3

Oh and can we get snow shoes? Or tie planks of wood to our feet to walk sturdier?

>>21072955
Continue pursuing john, keep dragon's bacculum in mind.

>>21072981
You are actually very light, you're only bone and armour, and the only thing on you that really increases your weight is the bow.

Overall you weight a total of 80 pounds. Less than most wolves. It's your sheer strength of will that stops you being knocked about like a doll.

>>21073003
You wait with the caravan until the driver comes along in the morning and asks if you're ready to go.

You tell him you are and you travel north through the mountains. The going is slow, but atleast it's going in the right direction.

What do you do?

>>21072955
Meditate the remaining hours of the night. And by meditate, I mean dance.

>>21072955
Put on the Ninja FlipRing, the Fog Ring, and hunt us down a fag in rock armor. Preferably by killing him in an ironic way involving him being crushed by his own armor

>>21073030
Get to know the trader, see if he has any good stories. Try to set a network for the distribution of Stumbles' goods.

>>21073050
You start to talk with the man, but he stops you before you can really begin.

>"I don't want to get attached or friendly with you, nor should you with I, just incase one of us dies or something. So no names, got it?"

You agree.

>"Well, I started out as a blacksmith's 'prentice. But there was no glamour, or money. So I took my wares, and sold them, three times the normal price, mind you, to soldiers who lost theirs in battle. I actually add a little magnesium, and tell them to stick it in a fire. Hehe, gets 'em every time. They all think it's a magic sword, and they're unbeatable."

You can tell this man is an opportunist, thriving off the deaths of others.

You're past the mountains, and into the flat expanse beyond. Where everything is cold and white, and the skys grey.

What do you do?

>>21073104
ask him how much a dragon's bacculum would cost

>>21073104
Not much to do till the confrontation really. Wait, dance, gather honey. Maybe compose a heroic tune using our bones as a xylophone.

>>21073104

"I spy with my little eye something begining with "S"".

>>21073195
The man stares at you in disgust.

>>21073199
You decide that there's really not going to be anything worth seeing or talking in these frosty lands, so you let your mind wander.

Before you know it, you've arrived at the strong hold the man wanted to reach, no raiders descended upon you, they were most likely busy.

You enter the strong hold with the caravaner to ask about John.

None know the name, but when you start describing him they all quickly turn away. It would seem everyone north knows of John, by his deeds, but none wish to talk about him, or even think about him, really.

What do you do?

>>21073259
Go into a bar, look for the most mysterious stranger, get him into drinking, make him spill the beans. Simple.

>>21073259
"Don't give me that look, one of those would make a bitchin mace. Even has the whole insult to injury thing."

>>21073259

Ask if they've seen or know of John blocking powerful attacks with the use of magic or if he's all out attack.

>>21073279
This is an outpost, not a village. The closest thing to a bar is the cellar. So you decide to enter there, anyway, looking around you see a lot of mysterious strangers.

It's mainly because you know no one here, and it's cold so everyone keeps their hoods up.

You ask the one in black at the end of the room, smoking a cob pipe.

>"Yeah, I know. Buy me a drink and I'll tell ya."

You purchase a drink for the man, something warming, like a mug of flaming ethanol.

>"That'll do it."

The man slaps his hand on the mug, killing the fire, and knocks back the potential fuel.

>"The Stone Giant, or John, as you call 'im, is coming this way. Last I heard he figured a military outpost ought to have some good fighters, so he'll put 'em to the test. He was a day behind me, and I got 'ere this morning, and I'm leaving now. Good luck, thanks for the drink."

The man hastily leaves.

It would seem John, or the Stone Giant, as the locals call him, is coming to you. Seems simple enough.

>>21073344
>"None of us 'round 'ere use that 'eathen magic!"
The men spit on the ground at the utterance of "magic".

Seems no one's really tried.

What do you do?

>>21073371
"Good to know. Can people tell me a bit more about John, I know all the stories but I'm wondering if anyone has first or second hand accounts of how he fights."

>>21073371

Get something white to cover yourself with such as curtains, get up to a high place and be on the lookout for the John with your siegebow out.

Also do we know what he looks like?

>>21073398
Another man to your left pipes up, he's missing both legs and an arm.

>"I saw him! I saw the Stone Giant in battle!"
The man sounds half man.
>"I was there on the fields of the white poppies, and all the fighting stopped. The earth itself shook with fear at the sight of him. He towered above the tallest of us. None of our arrows could pierce his armour, nor swords or mace or hammer. But that weapon of his, oh gods, what a weapon! He twisted himself like a screw, bringing it back around almost all the way. Everything he hit turned to red mist!"
The man takes a drink with his remaining arm.
>"Anyone who ran was crushed by thrown corpses, anyone who met him was destroyed by that hammer. There was nothing we could do but hope for a quick death. He came to me at the end, shattered my legs and arm. I hid under the bodies of my brothers, I know I should of faced him to the end, but they way he moved from one man to the next terrified me. He didn't regard us as men, no, he saw us like flies to be crushed."

The man continues his drink, now thinking of the day he met John.

>>21073447
Like 9 feet of walking rock.

You grab a tarpaulin and shroud yourself on the battlements, waiting for dawn and the fight to come.

What do you do?

Dig a hole in the main path into town then hide in it and as soon as john comes into town crush/drown him.

>>21073447
He will have the unmistakable stench of death around him, a cold glint in his murderer eyes, and a fucking huge granite armor.

Perhaps an avalanche might do the trick?

>>21073481
It's flat expanse for miles around.

>>21073477
Will you dig a hole or wait on the battlements, camouflaged?

>>21073500
dig a hole. grab him by the ankle and explode him

>>21073500
Play possum naked and surprise him with a super pressure touch? Wait, would that turn his armor diamond or something? Perhaps the drowning touch would be a better method here.

>>21073474
Hmm so he just buffs up and runs amok.
Let's get sneaky.

If we could make him trip and fall he might break himself apart, or atleast his stony hide, and leave him open for assault.

>>21073515
Stone has little care for water pressure.

>>21073515
this, but if you cant reach skin. maybe just drowning touch

>>21073515
You decide hiding in plain sight wont do the trick. You grab a shovel from the stables and head out and along the main path, where John will come from.

You dig down several feet, and wait.

Dawn comes after night, but everything is still just shades of white and grey.

Then you feel it, the very ground quakes with each of his steps.

You peek over the hole, covered with the tarpaulin.

John walks like his own army on a warpath. You can see the handle of the hammer on his back, think must weigh as much as you.

He passes by you and stops, he can sense the magic than animates you, but doesn't have the intelligence to figure out where from, especially when everything looks exactly the same.

What do you do?

Rolled 57

>>21073515

"Yo Hydra! Can I kill him this way or do I need to touch bare skin?"

>>21073581
Needs to be over 70 for guidance.

Rolled 79

>>21073586
HYDRA, GRANT US GUIDANCE!

>>21073608
The voice of your god comes from the snow and the caverns around the area.

>"I do not know this creature, he doesn't come from the oceans, or the lakes. He's a man, grown mad, truly, with power. Don't let him hit you, that much is certain."

What do you do?

>>21073630
wait for him to make the first move

dance the dance of hiding

>>21073630

Haha, I ain't touching him, no way! Sounds like sniping him with arrows is the safest way to deal with him. Lets wait until he moves away (say 100ft) then fire!

>>21073630
>idiotic meatbags
>having any patience
Just wait, he'll either retreat or fall into the snare. Unless he's got some magic detection spell or ability. but he'd have used it by now, I think.

>>21073630
He doesn't know where we are? Good. let him go a bit further and then put an arrow trough his back. If he comes close, then Crush the man with the power of the deep darkness.

>>21073672
John has no idea where you are, just that you're near. A man, or thing, like that will wait for ever for his quarry.

John takes his hammer off his back and places it infront of him like a knight guarding a bridge. You're gonna be here for the long haul.

What do you do?

>>21073630
We could try siege bowing him, but honestly I doubt doubt that's going to do that much.

Let him get to the hole and fall, if he doesn't our best bet is to sneak up on him, climb onto his back so he can't swing to hit us and in a position where he can't really grab us and then drown him.

Rolled 81

>>21073700
Ask the hydra to move the snow to create a snow storm. Whittle down his armor when he can't see.

>>21073700

Which one of us is an immortal skeleton here? I'm sure we can wait him out.

>>21073732
Hydra intervenes when you hit over 90. At only 80+ you get a nice little bonus, isn't that good?

Session bonus: Resilience. Your bones wont turn to powder on impact, just shatter.

>>21073734
You can, but can your Hornbees?

What do you do?

>>21073700
Whelp, guess it's time to man up and face him in the field of battle. With a kickass battle music.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tP27A1RYba0&hd=1

>>21073760

Ah! I can send hornbees out to distract him so I can leap on his back!

>>21073801
We need to tell the bees to find some holes or gaps in the armor and get inside. If they get inside his helmet or something like that then he's going to be very sad.

>>21073801
"Right then, do your thing, hornbees!"

They swarm out of your chest cavity and go straight for John. But they can't find any gaps in his armour other than the mouthpiece, and he's just eating the ones that go through there.

Every sting that lands isn't even registering with him. And now he knows where you are.

John lifts his hammer and walks towards you.

What do you do?

Rolled 73

>>21073760
Grab his legs and drag him underground. This is to stall him for a time while we relocate.
Once he knows we're there try to find a forest to run to. The plan being to dig another hole there and trap him there.

>>21073850
As he gets closer you grab his legs and pull. But fuck, is he heavy.

Roll 1d100 for test of strength. Over 80 succeeds, only first 3 goes.

>>21073842
Drag him down, climb onto his back, wrap around him, DROWN THE FUCKER.

Rolled 67

>>21073870
Rolling to pull the mountain down.

Rolled 4

>>21073870
HYDRA!

Rolled 43

>>21073870
At least we got res...

Rolled 96

Please work!

>>21073884
>>21073889
>>21073894
Welp.

John resists any attempt to move him.

He cocks his leg back, and sends a kick right for your head.

The impact removes you from your hole, and sends you sliding backwards about 20 feet.

John thinks it's another worthless kill until you stand up.

He's moving towards you now.

What do you do?

>>21073907
Dance the dance of superior mobility. The sea wears down stones every day, he will tire before us.

>>21073917
Roll 1d100 for dancing. First three only, highest is chosen.

>>21073904
Well... Damn...
>>21073907
Release arrow. Run away. Release arrow. Run away.

>>21073907
Feint rushing at him, get him to swing his hammer a second too early, dodge that, cover the rest of the distance and grapple the fucker, preferably by grabbing onto his back. Do what the Man in Black did to Fezzik in the Princess Bride, but with more drowning.

Rolled 28

>>21073922
Let me show you the dance of my people.

Rolled 39

>>21073922
DICE GODS BLESS US, IN HYDRA'S NAME

Rolled 74

>>21073922
Fear our fleet-footed fury!

Rolled 70

I'd better not pass while at 4th place again.

>>21073907
>No More Heroes - We are finally Cowboys
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FISXJNCcLM0&hd=1
So it has come to this. You must outdance him in the field of battle and apply a pressure attack on his armor. Either it will collapse on itself, crushing the Warlock to death, or it will crumble and allow him to be harmed by conventional attacks.

Rolled 27

>>21073922
Fuck you /tg/ dice.

>>21073925
You hop back, loosing arrows as you go. Each one just shatters on the monstrously thick plate of his.

>>21073942
You loose a final arrow, knowing that it's pointless, and fall back on your ultimate weapon. The dance.

You allow John to close in and swing, but your moves are too fresh and you duck under the stone hammer just in time.

But every sword blow just nicks off the armour.

John gets bored of your games and backhands you, sending you to the floor once again.

He's moving in for the kill.

What do you do?

Can we start a fire if we have the hornbees hover near some dry kindling?

>>21074001
There is no kindling near, and they don't produce that much heat.

>>21073992

Concentrate all of our great power into one punch rigt in the centre of his chest. Hopefully trying to break a hole in his armour.

>>21074020
Roll 1d100.

For all combat moves against a "boss" character, just roll that 1d100.

>>21073992
Get inside his reach, use our dance powers to stay in hand contact with him while avoiding his blows, and drown the fucker with magic. Maybe even explode him if we can jam our arm through the mouthpiece so we explode him in the armor instead of outside of it.

>>21073992
Strike the back of his legs, and once he falls start hammering on his skull.

Rolled 59

>>21074036
Rolling

Rolled 74

>>21073992
stab through his mouth slit

Rolled 4

>>21074030

Power smash!

Rolled 95

>>21074035

Rolled 8

>>21074030
Roll out of the way of harm, ride the shockwave produced by the hammer hitting the ground and recover mid air. Continue offensive actions.

Rolled 56

>>21073992

Might as well try Hydra's Decompression by punching him. If we fail, we'll never see the baby Stumbleses...

>>21074078
I think we need actual skin contact, something that his armor prevents.

>>21074020
Why in the centre? We already know that there's a hole to his mouth, so why not punch/strike trough that and make a milkshake in stone.

>>21074045
You can't get a clean shot at the backs of his legs, and fall short each swing. Having to dodge again and again is a big factor.
>>21074047
You stab through, but there's not enough room to go for a killing blow. You have to remove the sword.
>>21074048
*Dink*
Nada.
>>21074057
You go berserk on his mouth piece, eventually smashing it it open enough to put a hand it.

You grab his through and feel the seas flow through you.

Before long John is down on his knees, water spewing from his mouth, if you'd of stayed on a few more seconds it would have knocked him out. But as it were, he gave you an uppercut that shattered you jaw.

You rise at the same time as him, and you can see his mouth, pumping the water out of his lungs and through grinning teeth. John doesn't know how this'll end. And he likes it.

What do you do?

>>21074107
Here.

>>21074057
>>21074035
Somebody else had the same idea, I guess...

>>21074114
Replace "through" with "throat".

Oops.

>>21074057

This looks hopeful!

Rolled 75

>>21074114
We're pissed now. Stab him in the face with our broken jawbone.

Rolled 5

>>21074114
Hydra give me strength to cleave the armor of this unbeliever.

>>21074150
Hydra is busy fapping and can't hear you. The sight of this godlike abomination pleasuring itself would drive mortal men to untold depths of horror and madness. It would make you want to knock first from now on.

>>21074141
You remove your own jaw bone, and stab him through the hole in his mouth guard. You break through his skin and into his jaw.

Blood starts pumping out as his body deals with a sensation he forgot so long ago. Pain.

He pushes you off and raises a hand to his own mouth, removes his fingers and examines his own crimson life source.

He gives that same smile as when you almost drowned him.

What do you do?

Rolled 28

>>21074176
shoot him in the face with the bow

Rolled 27

>>21074176
HORNETS

Rolled 85

>>21074114

WE, CANNOT, KISS, CLARICE!

Grab and start punching him in the face, the fourth hit Decompressing him.

Rolled 79

>>21074176

Shove our sword into that mouth hole and twist it around. Mush him up real good.

Rolled 33

>>21074176
Have the hornbees attack his unprotected face, and then stab him once he's distracted.

Rolled 20

>>21074114
Feint him into a downwards hit, dodge out of the way and capitalize on his temporal unbalance with a touch attack to the mouth, which will naturally contain the other Daily.

Rolled 88

>>21074176
Beat the fucker with all the force of your pent-up sexual frustration

>Out on the strong hold

>"Shit, is that guy actually fighting John?"
One soldier says to the other.
>"Yeah, looks like he's winning, too."

>"Yeah, but for how long?"

>"Long enough to place bets. Get the guys, we're gonna make some money on this."

>>21074185
You jump back and fire off an arrow. John shoulder barges into it.

>>21074198
Roll 2d100 for your romantic rage.

Rolled 19, 9 = 28

>>21074216
This love was never meant to be.

Rolled 80, 10 = 90

>>21074216
I AM NEVER GOING TO FUCKING GET LAID AGAIN. I CANT EVEN RUB ONE OUT HYDRA DAMNIT. FFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

Rolled 72, 16 = 88

>>21074216
rolling

Rolled 78, 20 = 98

>>21074228
TAKE MY LOVE, MY ANGER, AND ALL OF MY PENT UP SEXUAL FRUSTRATION!

Rolled 85, 74 = 159

>>21074216

Rolling for great justice

Rolled 22, 30 = 52

>>21074216
I roll to seduce

Rolled 32, 70 = 102

>>21074216
"DO YOU KNOW WHAT IT IS LIKE TO NEVER KISS A PRETTY GIRL AGAIN?! TO NEVER FEEL THE FUCKING WIND, RAIN OR SUN?! YOU MISERABLE FUCK, YOU STILL HAVE FLESH AND YOU COVER YOURSELF IN GRANITE AND DO NOTHING BUT FIGHT! YOU FUCKER!

You're going to have to hit over 170.

Rolled 4, 63 = 67

>>21074216
WHAT IS LOVE!?

>>21074240
since we're missing a jawbone, wouldn't it sound like ggghhaghaaaaaaaghaaaaaaaaa

Rolled 62, 58 = 120

>>21074216

Let me show you the true power of <3!

Rolled 34, 77 = 111

>>21074258
DICE GODS, LET THE WORLD KNOW OUR ANGER!

Rolled 83, 42 = 125

>>21074262
...BABY DON'T HURT ME!

Rolled 72, 8 = 80

>>21074258
LET US DANCE THE DANCE OF ROMANTIC AND SEXUAL FRUSTRATION!

THIS IS HOW YOU CHANNEL ANGER/SWAGGER.

Rolled 11, 20 = 31

>>21074258
Dayumn, that's like a 5% chance.

Rolled 35, 51 = 86

>>21074274
NO MORE

GODDAMN IT FUCKING EMAIL

Rolled 81, 19 = 100

HYDRA, GIVE ME ALL YOUR LOVE!

Rolled 29, 1 = 30

I don't think the dice gods want us to have this one guys

Rolled 62, 53 = 115

>>21074258
I sentence him to Death. Death by Snu-snu
[spoiler]And by Snu-Snu I mean my bony hands crushing his windpipe.

It seems as though you can hit him in the face with ease, but when ever you go in for the decompress, you knocks you back.

John is getting tired of these games. He stands and you can feel the pressure in the air change.

John is marching towards you.

His hammer raised high and ready to swoop down and crush you.

Roll 1d100, first 4 returns.

Rolled 80, 70 = 150

goddamn it I SAID FUCKING ROLL

Rolled 21, 29 = 50

>>21074299
It's like we're spamming this until we hit it-

Oh wait.

Rolled 50

>>21074303
MOVE BITCH, GET OUT DA WAY

Rolled 27, 61 = 88

oh well

Rolled 54, 1 = 55

>>21074216
come one dice gods

Rolled 44

>>21074303
Jam our sword through his face.

>>21074216
*sobs*

(first dice roll)

Rolled 92

>>21074303
dodgan

Rolled 40

>>21074303
Sweep the leg and stab him in his face.

Rolled 29

>>21074303
Could we perhaps start using our sword to hit him in the face?

Rolled 97

>>21074303
Feint him, then hit back.

Rolled 28

HERE WE GO, DERPAHERP NO GOOD ROLLS TODAY!

Rolled 47

>>21074303
we are SO keeping this guys corpse for erik. And beating it with a dragon bacculum to relieve frustration

>>21074328

This is the 3rd 1d100 roll Mr Storydude, please notice... please...

Rolled 31

>>21074303
the dance of dodging

>>21074350
>>21074303
Let's not use the explodey daily, and take this guy's jawbone when we kill him.

Enough rolls now.
>>21074338
John sweeps the hammer low and hard, but you raise your sword like a flag.

The hammer never connects, you look up and see the point of your sword sticking into his jugular. His scarlet essence escaping from his throat and mouth.

John falls to his knees and drops his hammer.

He looks at you,

>"Finally..."

The voice is like a great drum, shaking your bones as you grip his throat and do the old miracle.

You feel the warm body explode and escape from the only exist available. The helmet.

9 feet and 700 pounds of flesh all come shooting out and hit you like a geyser.

>Out on the battlements...

>"HOLY SHIT! HE DID IT!"

>"That's everyone's money, too me! Ha! I can't believe you bet on your own deaths. Idiots."

>Back on the field of battle.

There's an empty suit of stone armour and a thick coating of goo where a man once resided.

What do you do?

>>21074405
Scream your sadness to the heavens, and search for his jawbone to replace your own

>>21074405
Check the inside the armor for relics, or failing that break off a piece for Erik to study.

>>21074405
Give the man a grave.

Dig a hole for it, put all the flesh and his armor in and as headstone jam his hammer into the ground with the helmet rested atop it.

This guy was just like us with a bit more crazy boredom.

>>21074430
Not all the flesh. He owes us a jawbone.

>>21074436
Oh shit. Without a jawbone we can't explain why we're a skeleton to those soldiers.

>>21074429
The armour was just stone, very thick and heavy, John must of been more monster than man to use it.

>>21074414
You find his jawbone piercing your chestplate. By 4 inches. You attach it to the bottom of your skull, it fits, pretty nice.

>>21074430
You dig a grave with the shovel you left in your own pit.

You push the armour and the bits you can find into it, save the helmet and hammer.

You cover it and return it to the earth, then place the hammer as a marker, with the helmet standing on it.

What do you do?

>>21074446
Well, we didn't need lungs, tongue, windpipe or mouth for that either. So maybe Jawbone ain't so important.

Rolled 1

>>21074472
Dance the Dance of Burial.

>>21074472
Find souvenirs for the folks at the manor, and then head home

>>21074487
...Everything rejoices the death?

>>21074472
Pray to Hydra to make sure that he rests in peace, untormented by his past, his madness and the weight of those he has killed.

>>21074472

"Testing. One, two, three. Clarice has nice tits."

Is our voice okay?

>>21074487
O dear, stop already, we don't want the likes of him rising as an undead.

>>21074446
You think they gonna argue? WE JUST ICED THAT FUCKER, WHO'S GONNA ARGUE!?

Take his jawbone, as a sign of respect. Give him an impromptu burial.

>>21074405
Take the armour for yourself.

>>21074487
Your dance is a solemn stance above the grave, showing respect for a great warrior gone astray.

>>21074498
There's nothing here but bits and death. No one would want that.

>>21074509
You feel the gaze of Hydra upon you, even this far from the oceans.
>"He rests below now, free from his torment in life. He found a glorious death, and is thankful."

>>21074511
You give a little test, it works, but your voice sounds two octaves deeper. Weird.

>>21074527
Your head only reaches upto the breast plate on it. And it's six feet under anyhow.

What do you do?

http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/21071586/
Archived.

>>21074556
Pack it up and head home, see if erik can put your voice back. Also, bring the pieces of your jawbone just in case he can fix them

>>21074556
Take the hammer.

>>21074556
Start the long trek back home. There's nothing more for us there.

>>21074578
John threw the bits into the snow after pulling them from his own face.

>>21074585
The magic that let John use it is fading. Are you sure you want to rob his grave?

>>21074556

Go back to the merchant we're with.

"The name's Sir Daniel. What's yours?"

>>21074597
Do not rob his grave, let him rest.

Go back to the bar/cellar, enjoy the congratulations and try to drink an ale.

>>21074597

Leave the hammer, if the magic's fading, it'll be no good to us.

>>21074609
>"F-F-Fredrick! Sir!"

>>21074617

The ale just spills through your ribs and pools underneath you.

This is it for tonight then, hope you had fun.

>>21074646
"Ha ha, dangley parts. Man, this new voice is weird."

It was scary, I thought we where going to die!

>>21074696
You ARE dead...

>>21074705
Does the deep voice mean we gained the power of Barry White songs, in addition to the power of dancing?

>>21074745
Yeah, sure.

>>21074764
Fuck year.