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File: 1349300217717.png-(90 KB, 300x300, Erik the Lich.png)
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You are Sir Daniel, an old hero long dead, or were, until Erik the Lich resurrected you to be his helper.

Fortunately, Erik is the laziest man you've ever known, and only wants to read erotica. But you're a good servant, and want to help your master by clearing the ladder to the top.

Last time you killed Beric the Elemental with a Siege arrow, splattering him upon his castle. In his home, which you looted after murdering him, you found a collection of old books and tomes, plus Meryl the Mantis lady, who is being courted by Stumbles.

You took Beric's body back for Erik to practice on, and he succeeded, in making him talk.

You gain four new things, the first two are rings, the first protects from lightning, the other a luck charm, or so Beric says. The third is a chest cavity full of angry hornets that follow your command, and the final a werewolf pelt cloak that has feelings for you.

You have one more target to deal with in the local area, Martin "Mort", another Necromancer, and a classmate of Erik's.

You don't know how powerful or evil he actually is, as he keeps to himself in his family's crypt.

What do you do now?
>>
First.
>>
Previous thread.

http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/20962433/
>>
>>20976897
Mort might have skeletal minions already, that means we can sneak up on him pretending to be one of his minions.
The problem is, that we are too clean. We should dirty up a little to look like a stereotypical skeleton minion.
Thought, we might want to learn if Mort actually has minions and how they look like before we dirty ourself
>>
>>20976897
have we gotten a necropenis attached yet?
>>
>>20976897
have we checked on our great great great great niece and her service towards stumbles tailoring business
>>
>>20976968
No.
>>20976979
She said she'd ask her mother when she returned.
>>20976955
You decide to check just how strong Mort actually is, you'll need to infiltrate his crypt. It'll be a lot easier if you look like just another skeleton, you tell yourself.

You promise Erik you'll try to be soft on Mort, but you'll still deal with him in the end.

The road to the cemetery is empty, as a funeral had happened the day before. It was for your grand nephew.

The opening to the crypt is two great marble doors leading down into the earth.

You're standing outside them in the growing gloom of dusk.

What do you do?
>>
>>20977041

Knock on the doors.
>>
>>20977041
STAKEOUT!

Lets observe for a while.
Hide somewhere, like behind a bush or something and wait.

Or just sneakily go in, being quiet and stuff
>>
>>20977067
Why not just bumrush him and be over with it?

We want to learn about him first before doing anything. Revealing ourself is counter-productive
>>
>>20977041
first we must get naked and dirty ourselves in the mud. stumbles can clean us later. also no more speaking only garbled speech from now. skeletons arent capable of speaking
>>
>>20977093

Nigger, we promised we'd go soft on him. Obviously we're not supposed to just kill him!

He's not even certified evil.
>>
>>20977067
Against all previous planning and reasoning, you decide to knock on the doors of the crypt.

After a few minutes, there's no answer. Mort is most likely deep within and can't hear you.

>>20977082
You decide to hide and wait, and watch for activity.

There's thick foliage covering some of the graves you climb into one and make a small hole to look out.

Hours pass by without activity.

Then the doors open.

And they come out in droves.

Naked skeleton, all with musical instruments, some using themselves or others as instruments. A mass of xylophones and and drums, some using maracas and guitars.

Mort is following behind with a trombone.

The skeleton parade goes on for sometime, then back down into the crypt. You're not exactly sure what just happened, but it was entertaining.
>>20977097
You remove your armour and dirty yourself. You now look like a freshly dug up corpse.

What do you do now?
>>
>>20977104
>>20977104
Well, we still need to LEARN about him more before trying anything.
If it comes to fight, we will have advantage of information.

If we want go softly on him, I have nothing against it but I want us to be more knowledgeable about the enemy first.
We won the previous fights by being smart.

Also, he wants or already is a lich. A proper lich. You need to do evil shit to become one (I think)
>>
>>20977170

He is not a lich yet, that's the whole reason he got in a fight with Erik. Read the previous threads before you jump into this.
>>
>>20977167
We need instruments.... Are there any bones lying around? Lets find some if not and then wait for them to return and join in the musical parade!
>>
>>20977167
Okay, we need to get a musical instrument.
Lets get a flute or something.

Then, the next time this happens, we sneak into formation and pretend to be one of his and go down the crypt.
>>
>>20977193
I read the previous thread.
Eric was recounting the events of DECADES ago.

He might have become a lich already, even if not, he WANTS to be one.
>>
>>20977217

Well you already have your answer. He's not a lich, and just because you want to be immortal doesn't mean you're automatically evil. Dumbass.
>>
Rolled 8

>>20977167
Skeleton band.
Kickass.
Do we play any instruments in our undeath? We might talk him into letting us join his band if we want to infiltrate his crypt.
>>
File: 1349301933812.png-(Spoiler Image, 218 KB, 954x766)
Spoiler Image, 218 KB
>>20977167

Grab a couple sticks and become the xylophone. Then head down into the crypt, all casual like. Take a look around.
>>
>>20977229
>just because you want to be immortal doesn't mean you're automatically evil

You are, if you want to achieve it through lichdom (unless it can be achieved through not evil means in this setting).
>>
>>20977204
You have no lunges to play the flute with.
>>20977202
There are none lying around, but there are spares in your chest.

"Go and hide somewhere" you tell the hive in your chest. Then you grab the bottom two, and pull. A soft pop, and you've got the stick.

You run them up and down, and sound comes out.

You wait until the next day for another parade.

Then as it's getting in full swing, you join in.

The music overtakes you and when it stops, you're in the crypt down below in the skeleton's quarters.

What do you do?
>>
>>20977279
Hmmmmm... Well now were just hiding in plain sight.. Whats the crypt look like?
>>
Rolled 14

>>20977279
Take a look around. As long as nobody notices our existence, it shouldn't be too hard to locate our target.
Try to reason with him before we outright murder his ass.
>>
>>20977279
Bear our surroundings.

Observe what Mort is doing.

If possible, find his journal and read it.
>>
>>20977272

Think about it. Why do you think he's spent so much time trying to become a lich yet has failed to do so? Because he can't stomach the method necessary to become one. That's why he got so pissed about Erik becoming a lich for free.
>>
>>20977298
I'd like to reason with him in position of dominance and control.
Like binding him when he is asleep or something. That way he cannot hurt us if he is unreasonable.
>>
>>20977292
It's old and stone, with marble busts of long dead family members above doors leading down into private lower crypts.

Torches burn in holders on the walls, and there's a speak-easy jazz feel to it.

>>20977298
You see Mort sitting at the end of the hall pondering over music papers, and notes on musical theory.

What do you do?
>>
Rolled 17

>>20977350
oh joy! lets roll to come up with a new beat to inspire Mort! Mabe while hes distracted its our time to try to reason with him!
>>
>>20977350
sneak into his bedchamber or study to look over his notes.
>>
What about my undead bride, Erik?!
>>
>>20977383
You walk along the side of the room and through a door in the side and into a bed chamber.

There's a trombone, a bed, a nightstand and a chest.

The chest's locked and you wont be sneaking if you break it open, but the journal is unguarded.

You decide to read some of it to get to understand Mort.

The most recent entry reads;
>Curse that Erik, with his new servant, why didn't I think of it? An old hero, that way the townsfolk would be bound to love me!

>Still no progress on Lichdom, and I dare not ask Erik, for want of my dignity. I know what I must do, but some part of me denies it. There has to be another way, if I can recreate Erik's event, I'll have it.

>I'm starting to lose interest in magic, I think. Sure it's good, but music is real power. I can make people do what I want as long as I say it with a beat.


It seems Mort is getting tired of failure, and might turn his interest to other pursuits.

What do you do?
>>
>>20977440

Do we still have poison on our blade? If so then can we dab some onto the tromebone's blowy thing?
>>
>>20977440
Oh, seems like he is not a bad fellow.

I guess there is no harm straight up talking with him. We might want to try to reconcile him with Erik so that they are friends again.
>>
Rolled 8

>>20977481

No, for chrissakes. Let's talk to him, convince him to give up his magic studies and give us his books. Maybe even become bros with Erik again.
>>
>>20977481
That might kill him.
This new information does not paint him like a bad guy. We should talk with him
>>
Rolled 15

>>20977440
'Convince' him to give up magic
>>
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9HgzNh4T46Y
>>
>>20977481
We have no blade on us, it's in the bush with out armour. A skeleton walking around with other skeletons isn't suspicious, but one walking out without the leave of its master is.
>>20977496
>>20977495
>>20977484
Reason stays your hand, Erik asked you to be nice, and you bloody well will be.

"Martin" you say, walking upto him.

Every skeleton in the crypt pauses and turns at you as Mort sits up.

>"I knew it! Erik sent his one man kill team after me! I've seen what you did to Beric and Roland, and you'll not take me! Minions! Tear him apart!"

"Calm down, calm down." you say as you smash the skeleton nearest you with your fist.

"Erik sent me to talk, he wants to know if you want to be friends again. Yeah, I've been bumping off the other magic users, but Erik doesn't want me to kill you. And believe me, if he wanted me to, you'd never know."

>"True... true... Minions, halt. OK then, Sir Daniel, you're going to do something for me. If it you succeed, we'll go talk with Erik. If not, well. I'll destroy you."

Mort lifts his hand and mutters a spell.

Roll 1d20 for ingenuity.
>>
Rolled 5

>>20977558
>>
Rolled 13

>>20977558
WERE BEING HIJACKED
CHARGE HIM
>>
Rolled 2

>>20977558
>>
Rolled 1

>>20977558
>trusting /tg/ dice for anything....
>>
Rolled 5

>>20977558
Praise your bones that Erik doesn't call you "minion".
>>
Rolled 1

>>20977563
Please take this one instead of the others
>>
Rolled 9

>>20977592
Or not
/tg/ dice, man
>>
Rolled 15

>>20977558

It's "dice+1d20" in the email field right?
>>
>>20977558
Roll away! No need for ingenuity!
>>
>>20977584
>>20977577
>>20977575
>>20977568
>>20977592
>>20977563
(My god...)

"THIS QUIET OFFENDS SLAANESH"

>"Who?"

"THINGS SHALL GET LOUD NOW."

>"What?"

"My fellow skeletons, hit it!"

The skeletons, who answer more to the feel of command, rather than actual command, begin to play. It's a jazzy beat, you snap your finger to the rhythm.

"Down down down down
Down down down belooooow!
Where plant's don't grow and the light can't show.
It's the hippest joint in town, the place to be, where the music raises the dead.

Dooowwwn belooow

In Mort's Musical Mausoleum!

Down belllooow!

Come on down, my baby doll, it's time to dance with death! Just gimme one, and make it slow, come on now, let's put on a show!

Dooowwn bellooow!"

You sing the song a few times, it's good enough.

>"Hmm..."
Mort strokes his chin.
>"It'll do. You've won, servant of Erik, lead me to him. We'll discuss our futures. I've decided to open a swinger's club, though I don't know what that actually is. I'm sure it'll catch on. Martin's Musical Mausoleum, as you put it, will do."

Through the power of song, you've won.

You lead Mort up and out, don your armour, and leave the graveyard.

The Manor house is illuminated against the night sky, a beacon of how much better its owner is than the common serf.

You knock on the door, and just enter.
>>
>>20977717

You take Mort to the Library to speak with Erik.

>"Seems you've done it again, my good man." Erik says to you.
>"Ah, my old friend Martin, I do hope it's all water under the bridge, between us. And I must ask, please, give up magic. I don't mind, but my friend Daniel has gotten it into his head to murderize everyone above me. It's the old adventurer blood."

Mort agrees to Erik's request, and sits down to speak of old times at school together.

What do you do?
>>
>>20977717
Oh god my balls
>>
>>20977724
>but my friend Daniel has gotten it into his head to murderize everyone above me

Wait, that was OUR idea?

Anyway, I like the idea of Swinger's Club. Would be a great place to relax. We should encourage Mort
>>
>>20977724
time to clean our bones again call stubles to draw us a bath. we need to wash up and maybe get our armor polish and clothes washed! we must be gentlemen if we are to help promote this musical mausoleum! and of course get all of Morts books.
>>
>>20977724
Well, we're still a butler, aren't we? Get them some tea and crumpets. Well, get Martin some tea and crumpets. Erik being a lich and all that.
>>
>>20977759
>Well, we're still a butler, aren't we?

Nah, we're Skeleton McBadass. That butler job is more suited for Stumbles.
>>
>>20977724

Check on Stumbles, has his tailor business got off yet? Has he got little mantis eggs? Will Eric be a Grandad?

Oh and change into Nobility Clothes.
>>
>>20977756
"You should go through with the club idea, there's empty buildings in the town where the economic boos will be appreciated."

>>20977758
"Stumbles!" you call for the spidery servant. "Would you draw me a bath? I've gotten a tad dirty."
>"Yesh, Daniel." Stumble's usually perfectly worn attire is slightly torn and a bit of a mess, like it was ripped off of him in the dark. Odd.

>>20977759
You're a servant, but no longer a butler. That's Stumbles, you're more like Erik's handy man. If something needs to be done, you do it.

There's no food in the house anyway, as the only things that eat prefer live prey.

Stumbles shows you to the bathing room, thick with steam, and takes your armour to scrub it down.

You climb into the hot water, and with your trusty brush, have a good scrub.

The water soaks you deep and proper, while you saturate in the water, you have time to think of what to do next.

There's 9 more people that need a good taste of death, but they're in other lands far away. So you can either deal with them, or handle issues at home for now.

What do you do?
>>
>>20977856
We have already done a lot in these few days.

We should not pursue killing mages for a while and focus on home matters.
We'd want to set up tailor business first and maybe help with Mort's club idea
>>
>>20977856
>>20977880
i agree with this lets get the tailoring business and club going! and bring our musical brothers and have stumbles make them gentlemen clothes!
>>
Stumble's tailoring, or Martin's club.

This is going to have to be a shorter thread, I've got somewhere to be tomorrow.
>>
Rolled 12

>>20977943
Stumbles tailoring! we need to dress our musical brothers and have the town in gentlemen clothes, plus our niece's apprenticeship!
>>
>>20977943
tailoring first then

>This is going to have to be a shorter thread
ah, shame`
>>
>>20977943
Let's work on the Tailoring business, but tell Mort that he should contract out to Stumbles for clothing for his musicians once he gets off the ground.
>>
Rolled 16

>>20977943
Ask Martin if he's interested in costumes for his skeletons
>>
>>20977975
I know, but I'm going to sleep on the bus and missing my stop. So I need a night of solid sleep.

>>20977984
>>20977974
You leave the bath and don your noble man's attire and go to find Stumbles.

He's in his make shift workshop, perfecting his craft. There's a strand of silk coming from his maw and into a sewing machine, he's using it as thread to tie a dress together.

"Stumbles, I've decided to help set up your little tailoring business. Is there anything you need doing?"

>"Thank goodnesh you ashked, Daniel, could you go into the town and hire me some help. Thish is all getting too much for little old me."

Stumbles needs a hand, his six aren't enough.

What do you do?
>>
>>20978058
Ask him what kind of help he needs and then go search for it
>>
>>20978058
lets go see if our niece is ready to start her apprenticeship!
>>
>>20977856
We should ask Stumbles if he's all right something might be wrong
>>
>>20978079
>"Jusht shome one to run the mashines, I need to make shilk, and run it through, but it keepsh clogging."

>>20978086
Little smart arse better be.

>>20978092
>"I'm fine, it'sh jusht, well, I'm going to be a father. I've never had resphonshibility before! And now it'sh sho much. I don't know if I can handle it. What do I do, Daniel?"

What do you tell Stumbles?
>>
>>20978058
Go get Rebecca, and don't take any shit from her
>>
>>20978058

Maybe that creepy smart girl might want to help. Girls her age love dresses, right?
>>
>>20978111
Tell him to be himself ;_;
>>
>>20978135
>"I'm a magically mutated shpider monshter, Daniel. Myshelf ishn't fit to be a father."

Damn Stumbles, that's some serious self esteem issues right there.

What do you say, if anything at all?
>>
>>20978111
"So you and Meryl really hit it off.

Well I'm not the best person to get advice from, back when I was still heroing about I slept with plenty of barmaids, shepardesses, grateful maidens, a few witches, that one supposedly chaste priestess and I didn't call back in the morning that often.

But what you have here Stumbles is a chance to have a family, to make a life with Meryl. Just be yourself, I know you're going to be a great dad, like I never was."
>>
>>20978154
Tell him not to worry, we'll be here to help him always if he'll need it but we're sure he can handle it
>>
>>20978163
go into town and get your niece no more games! she'll be fine with stumbles if shes okay with us! btw where is meryl?!
>>
>>20978111

"Wait, if Eric created you and animated me then that means I'm gonna be an Uncle!"

"Oh and be strict but caring, let them know that you love them but you won't tolerate any misbehaving!"
>>
>>20978190
"You're right, thanksh, I just needed shomeone else to shay it."
>>20978198
Stumbles chuckles
"Uncle Daniel, the shkeleton. Heh."

After boosting Stumble's confidence you walk down to Gallowmere, and knock on your niece's door.

>"I see you're back, uncle, come to revel in more slaughter?"

"No. You, and your family, are coming with me. With your father dead you've got no source of income. And it falls to me, to provide for you. You'll be Stumbles' apprentice girl and learn the trade, your brother will maintain the grounds, and your mother shall maintain the house while Stumbles works with you."

>"Oh, so now that the man's dead, the women are doomed, eh? Control that patriarchy, uncle, you're oppressing me."

You've never hit a child, but there's a first time for everything.

Before you can spank the little shit her mother comes out and thanks you profusely. It seems she has epilepsy, and can't hold down a job as she brakes things in her fits. You tell her Erik doesn't even know he has things other than porn, and you'll get medicine for her.

They pack their things, and follow you. You look like a mother duck with her ducklings in tow, Susan, Rebecca and Brian all following in a line up the hill as townsfolk gawk.

You guide them to their rooms, pop into the Library to tell Erik.

>"Fine, but you'll have to walk and clean their litter boxes."

Then you lead Rebecca to Stumbles' workshop.

How do you want to introduce them?
>>
>>20978294
Tell the child to stop being a smart-ass, those wolves were deliberately seeking out humans to kill them brutally. Just because she's slightly smarter than other kids does not mean she knows everything.
>>
>>20978294
"STUMBLES WE HAVE YOU AN APPRENTICE GIRL!"

"Rebecca this is Stumbles a mutated human spider. Hes a pretty cool dude."
>>
>>20978321
Well, do this AFTER the introduction.

Tell Erik that they are family and will be living here from now on. He probably wont care.
Tell Stumbles that the child is his apprentice and a helper now.

Oh, also make sure to give warning to your relatives that Stubles is a big humanoid spider before they meet him
>>
>>20978294
"Stumbles, this is my niece Rebecca, she is too smart for her own good and seems to revel in contradicting me.

Rebecca, this is Stumbles, entrepreneur and overall wonderful guy. I do hope you two get along."
>>
>>20978294

"This here is Stumbles. He will be your boss. Stumbles is harmless so don't be afraid. Also lass, don't be rude to him. Stumbles, if the kid gets uppity talk to me."
>>
>>20978321
You grab the child and say
"I let you be a smart arse with me, because I like conflict. But you will be only respectful to Stumbles, or so help me God..."

She sighs
>"Yes, uncle."

"Stumbles! I've got you an apprentice!"
The door opens and Stumbles scutters out.
>"Sho nice to meet you, Daniel shpeaks sho fondly of you."

>"SWEET MERCIFUL FUCK WHAT IS THAT?!"
Rebecca passes out.

"Hmm... Should of told her you weren't human. Oh well."

You and Stumbles shave a good laugh at Rebecca, little miss know it all, getting scared.

"Oh well, Stumbles, take her in and wait for her to wake up, then show her how things work. Soon people will be coming for your fine cloths from across the lands, my friend."

>"Really? You think sho?" Stumbles sees a bit giddy now.

He picks Rebecca up and carries her inside.

That went better than expected. You'll check in on them tomorrow.

Archived.
http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/20976897/

Now I must depart, sorry this was so short, but I'm a danger to society without my sleep.

More tomorrow.
>>
>>20978443
see you next time, op
>>
>>20978443
Sweet dreams OP
>>
>>20978443

Night OP


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