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>>20774860
Kikki’s really a lightweight, it’s kinda cute. A beer and a half, and she’s already spilling her guts in her cute little drunk voice.

“’Tanks for taking me out Lilly, I appreciate it…”

“No probs, I wish we could hang out more. You’re a cheap date anyway, not even two and you’re done!” I probably shouldn’t have been so mean, actually, she seemed to take it pretty hard.

“Shuddup, I don’t need YOU to remind me I’m a milk-drinker too. It’s not like I can help it or anything, I’m Felim!”

“Oh~? Sir Fearghaile giving you a hard time?”

“Lem drinks me under the table every damned time.” She took a deep swig of her tankard, one I think she immediately regretted.

“He makes fun of you for it?”

“Well… no, not really. He always says I don’t have to push myself, that it’s fine if I take it slow, but even then I’m always the one who’s trashed at the end of the night. Splitting headache in the morning, and Lem’s as fresh as the morning dew… it’s not fair.”

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>>20774884
Kikki sighed heavily into her drink at that point and spoke a little softer and lighter. “He always takes care of me though, always nurses my hangover, always gets me breakfast. Makes it himself if he can. I don’t always remember it, but he holds my hair back if I get sick and start throwing up.”

“Sounds like he really loves ya.” I actually felt a bit nostalgic about something I couldn’t put my finger on. I’ll have to look into that.

“You think?” I wanted to believe that she said it sarcastically, but would you believe she actually asked seriously? “I mean, after almost five years… he’s never touched me. Well, I mean, not like THAT, you know…”

It kinda surprised me actually. Sir Fearghaile has that same “starved” aura around him, even though I’ve barely every seen him. He must have a will stronger than any steel to hold himself from Kikki like that. No wonder he’s such a damned good diplomat.

“Yeah, I really do think so. James told me that back in their old realm ‘you know he loves you if he holds your hair back when you puke’.” Well, I still think that one’s a load of bull, but like hell I was going to tell Kikki about the sorry state Fearghaile was in while she was being treated for that nasty strike from an Ork mace. Would make the poor girl feel worse. At least this one seemed to raise her spirits a bit. “Have you tried making a move yourself?”

“Well… no… not really… I’ve kinda started, but it’s… it’s really, really hard to find the right time.” I could tell she wanted to say more the way her eyes darted back and forth. It was SOOOO HARD not to just read her mind there. Being a Good succubus can suck SOOOO much. But she seemed like she was sobering up a bit.

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>>20774936
“Barkeep! Two more!”

“Oh, Lilly, I really can’t, I gotta get back for dinner soon,”

“At three in the afternoon? C’mon, go on~”

Kikki hesitated for a moment and took a swig from her filled tankard. “Alright, well… there was this one time… We were on a diplomatic mission to the Halfling Shires, something about how Harem Knights were infecting their youth with wanderlust or something. Well, they make some sort of special whisky. After he had a taste, he bought a whole case of the bottles, something about it being just like home. Something about it was… different. It really mellowed him out, and it was strong too. I couldn’t even finish my first glass. And then we sorta started… making out, fooling around… but he stopped me. He carried me over to my bed, and tucked me in. Said it wasn’t right or something. I – I don’t know, I shunt rrly be telling you this.” She was starting to crash. I started to think I should take her home.

rolled 6 = 6

>>20774860
>good succubus
jeffgoldblumasbrundleflyin1986's"TheFly"puttingashotguninhismouthandbeggingforsomeonetokil
lhim.jpeg

why cant i find this image or video on the internet

>>20774964
Theres a long history of Succubi trying to go good in tg. My favirot was from Planscape Torment.

rolled 10 = 10

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NH-8L1iZq20&feature=related


here we go this should end some boners

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>>20774964
That's what I said in the last thread.

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>>20774994
>Implying I'm trying to cause boners

>>20774962
“Ready to go?”

Kikki rubbed her eyes and yawned a bit. “Yeah. Lilly, you get along with Sir GearHeart so well, what d’you think I shud do?”

If only she knew. Kikki leaned on me heavily as we walked out the door. “Well I don’t know if a succubus is the best person to ask, but since you did, bring him to me, so I can suck out his soul through his cock!”

“Hey” She punched me in the arm, probably harder than she meant. “I’m not that ducking funk.”

“Haha, got me.” I acted like I thought for a moment, but shit, if it wasn’t obvious, by now, she’s got no hope. “Just go for it. Tell him how you feel, and if he tries to stall again, tie him down and jump his bones! Don’t let him give you the runaround.”

“Hnnnh” Kikki was half-asleep on my shoulder with this cute little look on her face and OH so exploitable.

Now, now, I didn’t do anything, I said I’m a GOOD succubus now, didn’t I? I saw that she got right into Fearghaile’s bed so she could sleep it off when dinner came. Aren’t I a cassanova?

On an unrelated note, I just entered twice in the Lem & Kikki pool. Three day spread and vows on the next Day of Union, or it crashes and burns spectacularly (disturbingly popular).

That’s all for now, Journal

Love,
Your owner Lilly~

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Good Morning. Im back

"..."

"W-WH-WHERE ARE YOU? Y-YOU I-IDIOT IM GOING TO KILL YOU!"

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>>20774994
>Implying that theres not people jacking off to that this very second.

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>>20775021
Because REASONS. It's magic, I ain't gotta explain shit.

>>20775050
You know I think this is the first troll infestation, we have reached a mile stone.

>>20775074
Well to be fair, I did sort of bait it just a little bit, with the picture and the title and everything.

Also, for newcomers, The story so far, sorta: http://1d4chan.org/wiki/Harem_Knights

>>20774964
>>20775021
I am of the opinion all reformed succubi should look like old hags since they no longer contain the demonic corruption required to seduce men and should act like that slightly overbearing kindly old grandmothers

Godamn shitcunts guys you are making it so hard to stay up to date when you don't have that much free time in the day. Especially when you are trying to write a character into a world advancing farther and farther making it a perpetual game of catchup. Was planning to do chapters about a year at a time until I caught up but now i'm thinking of just making my current one last 3-5 years and just handwave a lot of stuff into the background.

I have a bunch written up in a notebook, but its written in the same monologue style as my first chapter. Was that an okay style or should I just not bother?

>>20775199
Don't worry. It's not a race; stories can take place anywhere in the timeline, and I think some of us jumped around a little bit until we got the hang of writing this.

>>20775175
That's very nice.
>Implying I give a shit.
>Implying that she is reformed.
>Implying that shes not still demonic and fucking every thing she can

>>20775255
Maybe it's just a quality of a poor writefag, but my stuff would make literally zero sense if not done in chronological order.

>>20775265
I never said she/you/whatever was/did/whatever, I was just stating something slightly related to two other posters. I haven't even really read any of these threads, so I don't even know how whatever this is works.
Saging since I'm still offtopic and I guess I should have the first time around.

>>20775307
Then put it in chronological order and make sure to line it up with the dates of major events. Nothing really wrong with that.

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>>20767172
It is unfortunate, but all drunken revelry must end, especially when you have things to attend. I removed the bucket from my head and donned my sallet. The arena was filled with more people, eager with anticipation as to who would pass the semifinals. The other contestants and I needed only to raise our swords to gain a cheer from the crowds.
Scanning the crowds I saw a lot of unfamiliar faces. I knew less people than I thought. There was Artorias. Thank the Emprah he wasn't competing; I had no idea whether magic was legal, and it was the only thing that could explain how a man one hands a greatsword like he does. Quite a few children attempted to peer over the railings, no doubt cheering for their favorite knight, perhaps their father. And there was Sera, saying something that was drowned out by the noise.
Waving, I stepped out onto the field. A few yards away was some man dressed in full samurai armor, no doubt a massive weeaboo in the Old Realm. I raised my shield, grinning beneath my helmet.

"Let's rock!"

I have begun working on part two. Lets see how far I get.

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>>20774860
>Catgirl and a Succubus walk into a bar

What is this bullshit?
Why do we get inundated with this kind of crap?

>>20776159
Go play Catan

>>20775881
Hey mate, you're free to write me into the Fencing championship. I was gonna write about it, but alas I have work.

Sir Kasai would/will fight with his sabre, wearing only his chainmail underneath his khaki's. Focus on his footwork and movement to wear the enemy down. I was gonna have him get to teh semi-finals, but if you wanted a cool opponent for the finals you can use me if you wish.

if you do, give me a good quote from Sabaton when I loose!

>>20776221
Let's decide the winner with a roll...

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>>20776221
I'll keep that in mind, thanks! I was tempted to write another character into the contest as a sort of final boss, but it felt rude to ask.

>>20776221
>>20776324

I am now saddened that haven't had a chance to establish my character's martial prowess.

>>20776196

There's been a recent resurgence of waifufags lately. I want to blame all the /v/goers that hav recently started visiting but that's probably not fair or accurate. In any case I have to agree, it's self indulgent That Guyism. But it's not breaking any rules, so there it is.

>>20776379
If you'd actually be bothered to look through 1d4chan, you'll actually see that this is a world-building exercise, so if you don't mind, we'll be having fun over here, while you go and jack off over AD&D 2nd edition over there.

>>20776379
>I want to blah blah
this board is filled with people lusting for monsters since the beginning. "inquisimod" recalls something to you? and please. waifu is a term that spreaded in all the damn internet today. don't start pointing and roaring "WEEBS" "FUREYS" "DEEEE" like is still 2006.
don't like thread?
HIDE IT.
now go play Catan.

>>20776567

Well you certainly got mad. Why don't you calm down? You seem to mistake my dislike for an active attempt to stop you. Feel free to go ahead an continue being an autist. Like I said, it's not against the rules. Another tip: it's 4chan. Learn to deal with people calling you a faggot for liking stupid shit.

>>20776669
>>20776567
Both of you, hush.

So, what's the ETA on red white and btirfag's next story, if anyone knows?

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>>20776669
you, pic related
>>20776696
you, go hush your grandmother

>>20776696
A long fucking time. Let's just say you shouldn't hold your breath. I spend so long second-guessing myself, I often have to go back and re-write whole sections, which then have a knock-on effect. Add to that, this is a long-ass sucker. Gods only know how long it'll take me, I'm afraid. I'm not a very consistent worker.

>>20776669
If only you knew that being an autistic allows you to do magic.

>>20776744
your mail is showing, cucumberhead!

>>20776742
If you need help developing, throw it onto a google doc and send it to me. I can leave you notes if you like.

tums dis up f u cri evry tiem :(

>>20775881
My opponent took an iai stance. Clearly, he planned to open up with the speedy move. I enjoyed it back in the Old Realm, one speedy strike to the head could give him an early advantage here. I stepped back, pointing my sword forward.

Time stood still.

He swung his sword.

I swung my shield.

The two crashed into each other, his blade knocked back as I parried the blow away. He took another step back; without that technique we were on even footing. As a sign of good faith, I removed my shield. It was time to solve the mystery of every sword thread I had ever read.

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>>20777210
Longswords and katanas have fairly similar movesets. They both have similar basic stances and swings, albeit with a few subtle differences and uses. This was a close match. The swings were wild and fierce, blades sliding off each other, locking and dancing like we were crazed, salsa dancing men, but with swords. Sheer exhaustion soon made our defenses weak. Stamina and willpower would decide the victor here.
Clang.
A hit to the torso knocked me to the side; I used the momentum to spin and strike back.
Clang.
He stumbled, then thrusted, hitting my shoulder.
Clang.
I slid in, brought the pommel to his chin. He stumbled down to his knees, giving a few wild slashes, before I banged him on the head.

"Match over!"

Is anyone here? I'm the only one who's posted in like an hour.

>>20777653

I've been writing something up for the past two hours. Waiting to finish before I post anything.

>>20777653
I'm hanging around, but keeping a quest thread running at the same time, as well as trying to write my story... Hence the lack of contributions.

>>20777692

Quest thread? Which one?

>>20777653
I atleast am about to post a story of my own, hopefully it's adequate enough!

>>20777680
>>20777692
Oh good. For a second I was scared those other guys had chased everyone away.

>>20777704

There is nothing capable of chasing me off. I'd just hide in a corner until the appropriate time to strike comes.

>>20777704
Nah. I've just been waiting from something to comment on.

The slower speed of the thread is good for me. It means my copying/proofreading backlog doesn't get bigger.

Not as quickly, anyway.

>>20777733

I need a good name for all the people running around with fox ears and tails. I'm trying to avoid Kitsune to refer to them as a whole, saving that for the magical kind.

>>20777704
Actually, I think I actually posted the wrong thread number again. Well, if anything it means people can catch up easier.

Personally, I'm having just a tad bit of trouble properly framing the dialog in this. Well, in this case it's more of a monologue. Getting into the characters' heads can be fun.

>>20777769
Wouldn't they just be an offshoot of Kanin? So Kanin should be fine, just call them "foxy"

>>20777789

Fox Kanin then?

Also still here, but I wouldn't count on anything significant from me before tomorrow. I could post a smaller block now but it's all character development without much(any) real action. Figured it would put people to sleep as is.

...hopefully i'll have my waifu around Saturday...assuming these threads are even running by then.

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>>20777802
I can roll with this,

>>20777704
Those ratty scum? Pah! Can rot in a pit, for all I care.

>>20777700
Civilization Quest, of course!

Polite sage for off-topic

>>20777769
Reynards.

>>20777802
Have them still technically be Kanin, but the Kanin and they refer to each other as "cousins", in a sense.

>>20777769
Inari should work

>I'm the guy from the last thread who made up the idea of a wizard being asshat before, harem knights not being the first outlanders in this world. I might not be able to write a proper antagonist like I originally planned, but I have something else to give you fair folk.

”Ladies and gents, the beautiful people who share this tavern with me tonight, I welcome thee to my divine performance! If the handsome gentlemen of the tavern would keep their eyes away from my chest for a tiny while, and the beautiful ladies dissolve the veil of jealousy for even longer! My furred ears have heard legends from far and wide and thus, I am here, to share these legends with thee!”

>>20777897
”One legend surfaces in my mind, thanks to the brave knights of the castle of Waifu, who reside just few miles distant! Most do not know, but they were not the first outlanders that set their foot upon our world! Years have been since their kind were seen last time. These souls, were held up against their will, by a wizard, no surprise, gone mad from the art he practised. These noble outlanders did not survive the horrific experiments of the maddened wizard, apart from one single soul. The outlander struck down the wizard on a moment of chance, and escaped! For days the brave outlander, named Samuel, wandered the woods and plains, but the wizard lived far from other folk.”

>>20777910
”Poor Samuel's survival was not guaranteed. However, light shone upon him! A lone hut, by the great sea. With the last ounce of his strenght, Samuel knocked on the door, and passed to an exhausted dream. Opening of his eyes was much more pleasant to him than expected, for by his resting place, which happened to be a soft bed, sat a beautiful maiden. The maiden, not named by the legend, explained that she took the poor Samuel in, cleaned his wounds, and put him to rest on her bed. Samuel's heart throbbed with a feeling like never before. Instantly, he knew. For the love of his life, was sitting beside him.”

>>20777917
”Samuel and the maiden lived together from that day onwards. Their own little paradise, in the litte hut by the sea. Sea provided food, and so did the garden maiden so cherished. Samuel spent his days practising the art of the sword, for he was ready to defend their paradise with his life. His thoughts and skills he recorded to an leatherbound diary that he had stolen from the wizard while escaping. He felt important to write his new, happy life into the pages of the diary.”
The Felim takes a large, white feather from the wide-brimmed hat that rested on her sandy-brown hair, gently sliding it across her face while her warm smile glows in the room.
”But, for the world is not fair, things were not meant to be.”

>>20777858
It doesn't even have to be that. Fox-like traits can just be another set of Kanin physical attributes, like humans have different shapes of ears, noses, and brows. Think simple. There's no reason to make yet another marginally distinctive race if we can just mix it with another within reason.

>>20777885
We already got Kitsune, bro, and foxes (and fox spirits) come out of the west as well.

>>20777922
”Thus was a stormy evening. Waves roared against the beach, wind howled its rage, and rain pummeled the ground like army of angry halflings. However, such weather did not frighten Samuel. He had made a promise to his love. It was her birthday, and he would give her a grand feast, with fresh game from the nearby forest. He took his fine sword and took off, sharing a loving kiss with his love at the moment of departure. Upon his return, he heard a sound never heard before. Large roar, almost deafening, pierced trough the storm wind easily. Worry filled his heart, and Samuel rushed home with everything his legs could give him. At the site of their homely hut, he found the sight most horrifying.”

>>20777929
”On the beach, was a massive creature of the ocean, it's long neck extended towards the skies, the deafening roar bellowing from its humongous mouth. The hut, was devastated. The walls and roof were no more, furniture nothing more the pieces of wood along the ground. Before Samuel could even yell the name of his love, the creature of the ocean had already started to dissappear towards the roaring ocean. Samuel did not care for that though, for he was already digging the ruins of the hut. And there she lays, wounded beyond belief, breath barely in her chest. Samuel was struck with horror. However his fair maiden, with her last breath, vowed eternal love for Samuel. And thus, her life slipped away.”

>>20777935
”The storm wind hid the broken yells of Samuel. He cursed every single being that he knew, for he was first taken away from his own realm, his comrades slain by the insane wizard and then, his only love was taken away. His soul was turned grey with grief. Samuel was ready to end his journey on this world, however, something in his mind stopped him. He gathered the few items that were not destroyed by the storm, like his trusted diary, and set off. Legend tells that he travelled trough the lands, gaining even more prowness in the art of sword. In his grief, he also crafted a knightly armor to wear. The armor however, shared the grief of its creator, and began weeping the moment he wore it. His sword could be heard crying in the dark nights, and even while slaying his opponents. His diary still recorded his thoughts, now tainted with the darkest of sorrows.”

>>20777940
”On his travels, Samuel saw others, who were luckier than him. They had found love. This, invoked only jealousy and rage in his heart. Why these people are allowed love trough their lives, he was heard bellowing, like the monster who had slain his love. His jealousy and grief clouded even his sight, and he wandered once more, without even slightest of directions. Legend tells that Samuel of Grief returned to the site of death of his love leaping into the ocean, not being able to bear the pain of living without his love any longer! The legend also tells that he left one thing behind... The diary, filled with his every sorrowful thought. They say that if someone finds the book and reads it, Samuel of Grief appears once more, and will hunt down every single person who carries love in their hearts, fueling his endless grief and jealousy.”

>>20777944
The Felim bard slipped the white feather into band of her hat, her red lips smiling once more. Her delicate fingers brush trough her locks of hair while her warm, orange eyes scanned trough her audience.
”Is this story just a tale, or does it carry truth inside it? Whichever it is, my dear ladies and gentlemen, if you find an old leatherbound book, please do not open it. For diaries are private, are they not?”

>The end, folks! The Bard is not really my character, but instead a framing device, telling stories and rumors about the world for others to chase! Hopefully it wasnt bad read!

>>20777885
I'm trying to avoid giving races Japanese names, they just don't seem to fit in with the rest of the names for the non-humans.
This would be different if we happened to be in a region where the locals spoke Japanese, but we haven't ventured there yet.
If it exists.

>>20777858
>>20777927
So you think I should just use Kanin then?

>>20777957

Add fox if it's necessary to make the distinction between the different types?

>>20777952
Ok just going to say that that was full of Rape and Adverbs. Not bad but I just did not like it. But hey I don't know jack

>>20777512
That picture is a very well made and concise explanation of Kendo/Kenjitsu. I don't know about European fighting though. Where did you find it?

>>20778019
Well, rape and adverbs are a chessy bard's stock and trade, after all.

But meh. I don't really have any strong feelings on that story.

>>20778093
I got that a while ago, on either here or /k/.
If you take a look, the European stances match the Kendo stances pretty closely, and a little research (read: Wikipedia) shows that they're used pretty similarly.

>>20778111
Like I said not bad not great just sort of in the middle.

>>20777952
I thought the final line was a great ending.

>>20777957
Yeah, Foxes and wolves are in teh same family (Pretty close anyways) so Kanin relatives works for me.

I was going to place the Kitsune as a bunch of clans that live in teh valleys and mountains on our south forest/mountain range, fairly secretive/secluded, you know?

>>20778019
>>20778111
>>20778141
Uhm... As I am not native english speaker... What does "rape" mean in this context? Am I raping the lore? The setting? Adverbs were used tons on purpose, but... Rape? Huh? Sage for offtopic.

>>20777952

I like it, even with all the Rape and Adverbs. Makes it sound a little more like a bard's tale.

>>20778149
Struck me as overdone. But I guess bards would overdo things anyway.

>>20778164
It's mostly a reference to something posted last thread.

>>20778164

My understanding is the 'rape and adverbs' is a single phrase. I think it means that the adverbs have been overdone, hence 'raping' the story.

>>20778164
Sorry its a little in joke in the last thread I brought up a sort list of writing tips by an author and he said that "She wrote her stories full of Rape and Adverbs." The meaning is the adverbs were just a wee bit heavy.

>>20778163

I have them living in a place well off the charted maps, where everyone speaks Japanese! 'Cause you know that not all the humans across the whole world will speak English.

>>20778222
MAGIC

>>20778229

I counter your magic with Trade Languages!

>>20778163
You up for doing a little retroactive ass kicking of some slavers in my writings Kasai?

>>20778163
I was going to put them up to being feytouched. Semi-immortal magical beings that are "awakened" from being mundane animals. It would explain their rarity and magical powers and it would actually put them right in line with the mythology around them.

>>20777971
That's not even really necessary. Just indicate fox-like traits.

Today I’d like to share the story of Patcheye the wandering merchant if you’d like to hear it, then sit awhile and listen. When the harem knights made initial contact with the elves and it seemed likely that they would kill us all due to several incidents of aggression and ignorance, one man argued very strongly in favor of pursuing better relationships and trade agreements with the elves at any cost. Reasoning that we could not possibly last much longer in a strange land without access to shelter and a steady food supply. This man, Patcheye as he became known much much later, was largely ignored by the rest of the Teegeeans who felt that despite the desperate situation an alliance with Elves would result in us becoming little more than indentured servants. Infuriated that the ‘knights’ would not listen to what he thought was nothing more than a necessity for survival, Patcheye stormed off on his own equipped with nothing more than a dagger, a crude map of the area, a deerskin cloak that doubled as a blanket, and a small book of the local edible plants.

>>20778180
>>20778193
>>20778200
I see... Thank you! Well, like I said, the adverbs were used on these levels knowingly. The character is very typical bard-like, so her dialogue must carry sparkles of sorts.
I am glad to see it wasnt absolutely horrifying story though. My confidence in my writing is at the gutter, and the first word describing the story being "rape" was only SLIGHTLY scary.

An unused storeroom adjacent to the library has been given to me by the Council. After some remodeling and a sound nullification enchantment, it is ready for use. I am considering applying this to the library as a whole, as well.

The Fey continue to bother me when they get bored, and so I have taken the liberty of enchanting the door to teleport anyone who tries to open it to Harbinger’s quarters, assuming they radiate enough magicka to trigger the enchantment. So far, it seems to be working.

Cerran expressed her thanks, so that she will be able to spend more time with me. Despite her abundant amounts of energy, I seem to be enjoying her company. It is getting harder and harder to refuse her offers of courtship.

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>>20778222
Please please please

>>20778265
All these things he had gotten in trade from the elves in exchange for most of his personal possessions that had come with him from the oldworld including a PSP with about 2 hours of battery life left, two condoms, a stick of spearmint bubblegum and half a snickers bar. He did however keep the one badly rolled cigarette he had left, and his small trusty digital camera that had been a birthday gift from his father. Sadly, he departed roughly five days before first contact with the Felim and by that time few knew he was even gone and fewer cared. Making his way steadily south- southwest his next few weeks were spent walking while looking out for both food and danger. As Patcheye began to near the edge of the Elvish realms food became more and more of a concern as he saw less of the edible plants detailed in his book. By his reckoning, according to the map the Elves had given him he was about five days away from what seemed to be a small village, but by this point he had not eaten a full meal in quite some time.

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>>20777512
There were shitstorms, then there was the result of that match. All the Outrealmers gave deafening screams of joy or frustration, drinks were spilled, a few thrown. I got the feeling that this one longsword versus katana match would garner more attention than even the final match of the tournament the next day. Best to enjoy the attention while I had it.
I raised my sword skyward, and with it the screams met a crescendo. Laughing behind my helmet, I relished the cheers and tears.

Drinking is a lot of fun right after a sports match, something I learned the fun way not an hour later. I heard that some fans could really go overboard with partying, but my god I had never heard so many victory songs in one evening.

>>20778276
Harbinger informs me that Aixys has been using the door to interrupt him whenever she pleased, and so requested that the enchantment be removed. That, and the enchantment won’t work on Ayxis anyway.

The enchantment was removed.

>>20778242

Anyway... I have Kuro (my dragon) picking up Belle (my fox girl) and her name in those far off lands.
You can cover a lot of land in 90 years. Ruby the fox came around a little later, after Kuro got bored and zapped a fox with some magic and gave it extra red fur.

>>20778292
It’s been eight days since the Fey sisters’ last prank. I doubt that any of my efforts to drive them away have worked; they probably found someone they deem more interesting to annoy. Whoever it is, I pity them.

>>20778270
Sorry bout that mate, I had ya figured for a returning participant in the thread and figured ya would have gotten the reference to the last thread. Its a good story, just not me style.

>>20778286
Suddenly an unexpected reprieve found its way to Patcheye in the form of a small band of Gnomish traders on their way back from the Elven realms, their ponies and wagons laden with the furs of woodland animals. They were skeptical of a human begging nonhumans for help but were very interested in his tale of how he and so many other strangers had come to arrive here, in particular they were amazed by his digital camera the likes of which they had never seen and were very excited at how it could apparently trap scenes instantly, they wanted him to show them more but Patcheye was worried about the battery life and told them that once it had used up its energy it would die. The Gnomes are a very curious and technologically minded race and they immediately began bombarding him with questions about what its energy source was. When explained the basic concept of batteries one of them excitedly proclaimed that an uncle of a friend of his father’s brother had been working on something similar. Filled with hope at the prospect of obtaining a renewable energy supply for his beloved camera Patcheye eagerly agreed to help the Gnomes with the unloading and loading of their trade goods in exchange for food and passage to their hold.

>>20778304
Cerran has decided that I should write about what I had done during the Ork attack. Unfortunately for any excited readers, I didn’t do much. I had fortified the library with the help of some of our mages, and it became a shelter for those who couldn’t evacuate the city in time. I admit, I was rather frightened at the time. We all were, really.

Cerran would like to say that I’m being too hard on myself, and that I showed “courage and determination in a time of crisis.” I believe she is exaggerating my contributions, though I did try to at least pull my own weight. Really, all I did was serve tea and try to keep everyone’s spirits up. A number of those who had hidden in the library became regular attendees of my lectures, so it seems to have worked.

>>20778317
Along the way the gnomes made several stops at various small towns and villages, mostly to trade with other gnomes but occasionally with other races as well. As they went Patcheye gratefully upheld his end of the bargain and in the process listened and watched the gnomes as they made their transactions, he began to memorize names of traders, what they dealt in and the prices of some of their goods. He impressed the Gnomes immensely when he managed to haggle a single deer pelt to a gnome with a reputation for being a skinflint for no less than 15 ounces of tobacco and a brass laden spyglass that he had taken a fancy to. When he proudly displayed his earnings to the gnomes they congratulated him on managing to work the old codger down from triple the going rate to one and a half, at this Patcheye grew somewhat red in the face and went back to watching and listening the Gnomes as they did their business. Patcheye was to spend over two years with that same Gnomish caravan traveling the land and learning the bartering business, he of course heard of the making of the Teegee nation and on occasion went there to trade but he still felt slightly put off by the ‘can do’ attitudes the knights all seemed to have and honestly never felt entirely comfortable there. He was glad that they were building bridges and trading with the other races like he’d hoped, but he never expected them to become so… Intimate with their newfound neighbors. More than once he was forced to sharply dissuade the advances of various monstergirls under the impression that ALL Teegee men were basically mansluts. Ever had to say ‘no’ to a seven foot tall drunken Minotaur? Patcheye did, and the bar he was in may as well have been the proverbial china shop.

>>20778342
Now partly because of this, Patcheye preferred to travel alone when possible. What few times he had decided to hire guards he had found them largely unnecessary, or otherwise simply loud, obnoxious, and very smelly. Patcheye was well aware that he could make more by signing back up with a merchant caravan, and had in fact received numerous offers from the Gnomes and from Teegee merchants eager to travel with someone already fluent in the native tongues and customs of several prominent races, but while Patcheye enjoyed making money he enjoyed the solitude and peace that wandering the land and seeing its sights brought much more. Thanks to the Gnomes he never really had to worry about his little camera running out of energy and while printing the pictures was impossible he had the memory space to store hundreds and enjoyed reminiscing about the places he’d been by looking at them before going to sleep each night. As more time passed and he became more proficient in the ways of trade Patcheye set his sights further and further afield and began traveling to distant Servid by way of the Thousand Sands. On one of his first trips Patcheye had the severe misfortune to be spotted by a pack of Gnolls on his way through the wastes. Patcheye was forced to ride his horse harder than was good for it in order to escape and by the time he was sure that the gnolls had given up pursuit the poor animal had collapsed from the heat, far from any of the known watering holes he had little choice but to put it out of its misery.

>>20778314
No problems, I figured quite fast that it cant mean excatly what I thought it meant. I did write this story with a help from someone woh participates in the threads often so I tried to keep it clear from literaly rape.
I have stories in mind for atleast two more legends, and I will be writing them relatively soon. Around tomorrow perhaps. That is if they really aren't bothering anyone.

>>20778354
For the first time since he had left the Teegee camp in his fit of outrage years ago, Patcheye wondered morbidly if his tendency for solitude and travel had finally killed him. He had at best three days of water and food in his pack and while that would have been enough to reach Servid on horse, on foot he was as good as dead under the scorching sun. Still, Servid was the only hope he had and he would have a better chance of meeting someone on his way there though the trade route than any other direction. Traveling in the morning and evening and resting through the hottest part of the day, his progress was tortuously slow. One day as he ate the last of his food Patcheye began to despair that he would meet anyone ever again before the desert sands simply swallowed him whole when he was broken from his reverie by a large black shadow falling from the sky and landing roughly beside him. After leaping back the startled man realized that what had landed was in fact a harpy, black of feather and lithe of limb, perching on his pack and staring at him curiously. Patcheye had never seen a harpy before and struggled to remember what he knew about them. Communal avians that live in matriarchal societies. Able to speak the common tongue and possessed of a remarkable capacity for sound mimicry. Omnivorous, mostly fish and smaller animals like rodents and lizards or fruit. Very attracted to shiny things. The feral ones were known to kidnap potential mates.

>>20778367
Hesitantly he greeted the curious avian and was heartened when she replied back in kind. His enthusiasm quickly died as it became quite clear after a few simple questions that the harpy was in fact a feral with no language comprehension simply repeating everything he said. Exasperated and feeling more than a little grim Patcheye flopped down on the hot sand, eyed the black feathered omen of his impending death and said:

“Hey… hey bird, say ‘Nevermore’ .”

Bobbing its head and smiling the harpy happily obliged him several times before hopping off his pack and wandering up to him to peer curiously down at his tired face. After a moment or two of this uncomfortable exchange the harpy abruptly attempted to seize Patcheye by the shoulders in her strong feet and take off, yelling in alarm and flailing wildly while the damned thing screeched nevermore over and over Patcheye realized that he was in danger of being abducted and forced to live a sedentary life as this impertinent birds mate on top of some impossibly high plateau or cliff face where there would be next to no chance of escape surrounded by hundreds of its lunatic relatives. After some brief mental arithmetic, Patcheye came to the conclusion that death in the sun a few days was preferable to a life of enforced parenthood trapped on some mountain with nothing to eat but raw meat and fruit. Regardless of his personal preferences this particular bird was too young to carry a full grown struggling man and as she came to that very same conclusion she angrily dropped Patcheye, hopped over to his pack and started to fly off with it.

>>20778362

Keep at it. Legends from the locals are always good to hear.

>>20778389
Crying out in alarm Patcheye surged forward and grabbed on to a loose strap, tugging for dear life as his remaining water and most of his other possessions were inside the disputed luggage. With a final sharp pull upward the harpy wrested the pack out of his grip and poor Patcheye fell on to the sand only to be hit sharply on the head by his brass spyglass that had fallen out in the struggle. As the thief began to grow small in the distance, still triumphantly crying out its call of nevermore, Patcheye began to feel tears of despair well up in his eyes that he did his best to stop lest he waste precious water. With no choice but to move on or give up then and there Patcheye despondently continued his march across the desert sands now with nothing but his little camera swinging from his neck, the brass telescope, hot from the desert sun and burning his hands, and that same cigarette he’d been saving ever since he arrived in his pants pocket. Every rolling sand dune felt the same to Patcheye, and his steps became slow and ragged and the day wore on. When he finally stopped to rest and look about through his telescope at the top of a particularly large dune he noticed something strange in the distance. A trio of Lamiae basking in the desert sun and looked to be having what he swore was a picnic. Fascinated and hopeful that these particular Lamia did not appear to be feral, Patcheye decided that further observation was in order before attempting to approach them. Unlike Harpies, Lamia had been known to kill humans on sight in some areas while being ‘very’ friendly in others, it seemed to vary based on the tribe and local customs. As he watched them, Patcheye was constantly reminded of how thirsty he was whenever one of them took a drink from a pitcher that was being passed around.

>>20778389
I like the cut of your jib

>>20778411
After a minute or so a new pitcher was brought out and Patcheye found his eyes widening and the rim of his copper telescope pressing sharply into the flesh of his face as one by one the Lamia began to remove their tops and skirts revealing subtly muscled backs and abs, coupled with shapely breasts and hips.

“Dear Emprah... Am I hallucinating?”

Patcheye said quietly to himself as the trio began to lather each other’s bodies with oil from the new pitcher.

“This is extra heretical.”

He mumbled as his little inquisitor stood at attention, alert for Zenos. Dimly in the back of his mind Patcheye wondered amusedly if he was dreaming that he was some protagonist in a Papa-N thread and if soon some giant sand worm would swallow him whole and he would simply wake up in the bed of some inn. Steeling his resolve, Parcheye began to wave his arms and yell in their direction, but only after a half hour of watching their ‘activity’ through his spyglass, for safety reasons. Finally the trio noticed Patcheye and began to move in his direction in a confidant manner, they hadn’t even bothered to clothe themselves. Tired of moving and too weak to run or fight Patcheye nervously waited for them to reach him, accepting that whatever they had in store for him would be his fate.

>>20778434
When they were about ten paces off they stopped and the largest one hailed him in the common tongue and Patcheye felt a jolt of relief, these Lamia were not feral and they at least seemed friendly. After explaining his situation the Lamia gathered together for a moment hissing among themselves while casting overt glances in Patcheye’s direction, making him feel slightly nervous as he lacked the ear to understand their native tongue or the means to speak it. Finally it seemed they reached a consensus and the largest of the three once again spoke to him.

“We sisters are Asenej(Youngest), Ecila(Middle), and Namai(Eldest). We find it surprising that a human does not run from us or try to kill us and we ask your name.”

From what little I knew of Lamia culture I remembered that a name given is a sign of trust for them, a stranger who will not name themselves or gives a false name is someone to be driven off. When I told them my name the smallest one giggled and said something in their tongue to the other two. When I asked, doing my best to keep my eyes from wandering to far below their faces, what she had said, the elder sister responded with a subdued laugh that her little sister had thought Patcheye was a more suitable name for me. Seeing I was confused at what they meant the middle sister produced a small handmirror, I have no notion where it came from and no intention of finding out, and looking at my reflection I realized that the time I had spent ‘investigating’ the three lamiae had earned me a deep sunburn everywhere on my fair skinned face except for the eye that the spyglass had been pressed against. I do not know if they could see my blush under the burn on my face but they laughed as though they could.

>>20778298
Alright, unless you're trolling, this is starting to become more and more, for lack of a better word, stupid. It kind of feels thrown together with the idea that "Yeah, this is cool" rather than meld these ideas using a more organic method. Throwing Fantasy Japan into the world is just a bad idea, especially since there's no narrative increments to the far east. This isn't fantasy wank, this is narrative world development. Things aren't added "Because they're cool" but because they fit the "character" of the world narrative. That make sense?

>>20778458
This transaction seemed to cement some decision they had already made and the elder sister casually invited me to come and stay with them in their cave. Not thinking twice I happily accepted and did not notice the blushes and excited glances and whispers exchanged between the middle sister and the youngest. I have since learned, very thoroughly, that an invitation from a Lamia to stay in her home is not dissimilar to a marriage proposal in our society and although the Eldest sister had tried to appear casual in her invitation it was actually quite a serious matter for them all. Apparently it is not uncommon for sisters in Lamia society to share a ‘husband’. Hardly daring to believe my good fortune I followed them to their home where I was treated to water, wine, and a delightful thick and spicy stew with what I believe was rabbit in it. Later that night when they visited me together I could find no justifiable reason to turn down their advances, they were after all quite attractive. With that I finally had a justifiable cause to smoke that ragged old cigarette, lying smug and comfortably entwined in a mess of coils and hands that did better than any blanket to keep out the chill air of the nighttime dessert. I spent some weeks getting to know the three and regaining my strength before I actually became aware that I was in fact their ‘husband’ but by the time I found out I realized I was really quite pleased with the sudden development. Now whenever I go out wandering the realms of this strange and fantastical world one of the sisters is there at my side while the other two patiently wait for us to return with new stories and treasures to wonder at. Tonight as I gaze at the one photo in my trusty old camera that I’ll never delete, a family photo of I took of all of us a few days after meeting (thank you based timer function), I couldn’t be happier.

>>20778399
Alright then! The alluring felim bard will continue her tales for longer!

>>20778499
The end /tg/, hope it was enjoyed more than my previous attempt at writefagging, and thanks to those of you that gave me advice.

>>20778489
As I think about it, it does sound more and more stupid. I'm not the best for coming up with ideas though.

>>20778512
This story was a lot of fun.

>>20778499
>lamia threesome
Niiiiice.
I'm looking forward to more of your stroies.

>>20778531
The other word I could use is Sueish, but that would be a bit cruel I think. Just think within reason so we don't get to that point. Even more interesting would be why a Dragon is hanging out with a Kanin like that. Seems like a real oddcouple, and an oddcouple story is a good way to flesh that out.

>>20778594
>>20778562
Thanks, I keep telling myself I'll stop writing in these threads and do my actual school work, but this is just so much more fun. I'm glad that at least one of my stories is getting positive feedback.

>>20778631

I'm attempting to come up with a good story for how they're together. So far all I have is Belle being the daughter of traders and Kuro being a caravan guard for a time. Needs more work. Everything I do needs more work, I'm amazed that I've managed to get this far.

>>20778631
Hey, question? How many dragon waifus do we have in the castle now? This may put a slight spanner in the words of one of my plans...

>>20778730

Two? I think mine takes the number to three.

>>20778652
I keep telling myself that I'll stop reading in these threads and do some schoolwork. We should be friends!

>>20778760
Out of a thousand knights. Hmm... Well, it's disproportionate, but not unbalancing, or totally unbelievable yet... Thanks.

>>20778760

Do we happen to have any sort of lifespan on dragons?

>>20778825
A very long time.

>>20778825
take however long they want to live and add a century.

>>20778244
I'm in. Last thread I posted a Sir Gary weapons observation.

Alright, now that my retcon is in place, time for more chaaaaracter development.

>>20778662
Tell me what you think of this: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1H4niv_0VK1m56hZZCSSTyVi36B_NMtu7EfkBndbaLfg/edit

If you like it, feel free to use it, abuse it, or change it as you like, or even ignore it all together.

>>20778943
Thanks!

God I wish I had artistic talent, I want to draw my character so bad. If only we had a kind and honourable Sir Drawfag among us.

>>20778974
There is that chap who drew that adorable medusa comic, he seems pretty good.

>>20778943

What would be a good reason for keeping a fox as a pet, other than they're cute, or do you think that's good enough?

>>20778499
>accidentally marrying a lamia
been there

>>20778730
i have Rydia, not sure about anyone else

File: 1348018349930.jpg-(316 KB, 888x1156, lamniatacoshitscribble.jpg)

>>20778974
Haha, don't we all. Unfortunately, I only have shit-scribble abilities, pic related.

>>20779077
Yeah, that's pretty much good enough. Simple as a fox-pup wandering into your camp with no sign of the mother. It wouldn't be too far fetched to presume the Mirthan nobility go on fox-hunts, so it works.

>>20779094
A whole coven joined us, didn't they? I mean, there are a few, but they're sort of spread out and kinda do their own thing.

File: 1348018687870.jpg-(508 KB, 1420x650, ds wolf.jpg)

I fucking hate dealing with new recruits. TeeGee has been growing, that’s no surprise. We get all kinds of people from all over and all walks of life. Lots of them come in wanting the life of diving into dungeons, killing monsters, and getting loot because lets face it, it can be an awesome life. Eventually, some of the other knights and I decided to found a formal little organization, mostly to just help keep track of who was where, if they were dead, and what loot they brought back, called the Dungeon Delvers (or Dungeon Crawlers, both are technically correct, but I use Delver). We were fairly loose knit and easy going (which I suspect led to more than one person underreporting their loot haul), and combined with the lifestyle we offered, we got a lot of new recruits. Granted there were some former soldiers or mercenaries who actually knew what they were doing, but a vast majority of the people we saw sign up were just average joe nobodies looking to make either money or a name for themselves. I suppose that I shouldn’t be so mad, given how most of the Outrealers used to be, but if you deal with enough idiots it starts to get to you, and I did have to deal with them. Just like any company with new employees, these guys needed training, and they had to get it from somewhere, which brings me to my last outing.

>>20779117

Ok now. I'm going to post what I have so far. Stops just before breakfast, so no background yet. Still need ti write that out.

>>20779187

That is so weird, I am writing about guard recruitment at this very moment...

>>20779208

Better start snatching up the good ones before their all gone.

File: 1348018846908.gif-(956 KB, 500x282, capra.gif)

>>20779187
I had been assigned a fresh batch of four noobs to train; a coininoch and three humans, one of which was named Taylor, but I’ll get to this retard later, along with Ana (don’t know why I even bother mentioning that she’s with me, she always is). I already had a mission in mind; there was a cave a couple days walk away from town where a trader said his son had lost a bag of prismere to some imps. I figured it would be an easy mission, (and I’ll admit, I was wrong) I loaded Everest up with some basic gear and we headed out. When we first got there everything was smooth sailing. We left Everest outside, headed in, killed some imps, and headed deeper in. That was when everything turned to shit, because that is when we ran into a Capra demon. For those of you who don’t know what a Capra demon is let me sum up what they are: bad. Very, very bad, not that kind of cute bad like you see with Lilly sometimes either, but more of a kill you horribly kind of bad. Now I may not be the sanest person around, but I’m still smart enough to realize that if we try fighting a Capra demon, especially in an enclosed space, that these recruits are going to die, along with possibly me. Luckily it hadn’t seen us yet, so I tell them all in the simplest way I can think of that we are not going to fight that, we’re going to turn around and go home.

>>20779223
And that’s when that idiot Taylor decided to show off his shoot first ask questions later mentality, literally. He picked up his crossbow, shot at the Capra demon, and then asked what he was supposed to be afraid of. Naturally, he got his answer very quickly, because the damned thing charged at us. I yelled at the recruits to run (now he listens), and Ana and I held the demon off as best we could, which ended with me using up one of our few grenades to bring the damn ceiling down. Unfortunately, it wasn’t before Ana got hurt. That thing’s sword went clean through her gauntlet and tore into her arm, even biting into the bone. Worse, its sword was poisoned or cursed or something. Ana could barely stand. I picked her up and carried her to the mouth of the cave, where the others were already waiting, patched her up as best I could, mounted her on Everest’s back, and then headed home as fast as I could. When I got there I got Ana straight to the clinic. She’s still there, whatever that demon got into her is resisting healing magic, Kari and the others are trying to come up with new medicines, but haven’t had much luck yet. They’re saying they may have to amputate. Really hope to avoid that, even if I had the money the Mirthterran crown and church keep a heavy control over healers capable of growing limbs. The Hole hasn’t had much luck with their arcane prosthetics and the only other place I can think of for a new limb is Harbinger, and I don’t even want to know where he’d get the limb.

>>20779246
Damn near killed Taylor when I saw him. He ran off, haven’t seen him since. Good, I’d prefer to never see him again. The coininoch and one of the other humans I recommended for a second mission, the last guy was too scared to go on another run. Still one giant question left though. What the hell was a Capra demon doing this close to TeeGee? I’ve never seen any demons that powerful within 200 miles of here before, and that one is still out there.
Update: the healing is taking a lot longer than normal and she spent a week in a coma, but Ana is expected to make a full recovery. Was a bit upset but cheered up when she saw her apple trees starting to blossom.

File: 1348019048493.jpg-(296 KB, 900x675, Fluffy tail.jpg)

>>20779196

I awake when the sun’s light begins to fall on my body. Opening my eyes, I see Belle clinging to me tightly, her face buried in my chest. She groans and raises her head when I shake her, “Is it morning already Kuro? I want to sleep some more.”
“You’re welcome to sleep as long as you like, just get off me first. I want to start exploring the castle soon.”
Hearing that, Belle sits up with a jolt, “Wait! I’m coming with you.” She jumps off the bed and tosses me my clothes and starts putting on hers.
“Why the rush? We have all morning, the castle isn’t going anywhere.”
She stops and blushes when she notices me staring at her while grinning. “Didn’t you get enough last night?”
“Maybe.”
Belle turns around and finishes dressing; she then tries to bolt out the door. I jump off the bed grab her tail before she’s able to escape. She gasps at my touch, and turns around to say something. My kiss silences her before she can get out a word.

File: 1348019101735.jpg-(453 KB, 2048x1361, Watch fox.jpg)

>>20779263

“Take Ruby and go downstairs, I’ll join you shortly. And don’t forget to order something good to eat.” Belle nods once, and then scoops up Ruby and runs out the door. I quickly throw on my clothes, grab my sword and daggers, and follow her downstairs.

The table Belle’s at is easy to spot, with Ruby standing at attention on it. I take the seat between them and scratch both behind the ears; they lean back into my hands.
“So what did you get to eat?” I say to Belle.
“A little of everything. I wasn’t familiar with most of what the innkeeper said he could get for us.”
“Food we’ve never heard of before? This ought to be interesting. I wonder what it tastes like…” My thoughts wander off as I fantasize about all kinds of strange dishes. I’m brought out of my reverie when Ruby hops into my lap. Looking up I see the innkeeper and a young Felim setting dishes laden with food on the table.

>>20779270

He takes a seat across the table from us as the girl bows and runs back into the kitchen. “I’m Brian and that was my daughter Karen. “ He turns to Belle,” I never did catch your name last night.”
“I’m Belle.”
“It’s an honor to meet both of you. Dragons are a rare sight, even here in TeeGee. If you don’t mind, could you tell me how you two met? ”
“Sure. The tale may be a little long though, so I think it would be best if we ate before I begin.”
“Take your time.”

>And that it for now. I keep working on the background story, and try describing what the natives might think of food from the old world.

>>20778489

I think that yes, we will eventually expand the setting, but I don't think we should just skip around. Lets work with what we have, and then slowly expand out.

I'm thinking that beyond the dessert and wastes to the south there is more of an arid savannah type of terrain, with more "feral" version of various species. Further to the east it probably taiga forests heavily inhabited by the Elves, transitioning into mountainous terrain and tundra inhabited by more hardy versions of some species.

In the opposite direction, across the great ocean are probably some archipelagos of again, more feral/islander/aquatic species.

I don't think you would start getting into the REALLY exotic stuff until you go even further in either direction. The world is vaguely based on ours after all right?

>>20779208
I have a fair amount of Air Force Cadet experience. Write me in as helping, with drill and commands and general whipping them into shape. Sergeant-Major of the guard to help the Captain?

>>20779298

Uhh, sure. I could always use a hand to do everything for me... Heh.

rolled 4 = 4

>>20779223
I TOLD YOU NOT TO MENTION THAT FUCKER! Where's my green paint?! You have no IDEA of the kind of angry-ism that thing's name ALONE gives me! Or maybe you do, having played Dark Souls yourself.

>>20779208
Incidentaly, you mean just guards, folks from the militia, or actual men-at-arms? I think it was mentioned a while back that after the orc attack, Teegee's armed forces were re-organised like Marius got his hands on them or something, as just a handful of knights at home at a given time, with whoever wanted to take up arms, just wasn't going to cut it.

>>20779324

Well, if you want to make me Gaius Marius, I'd be certainly proud to accept that title!

I was writing the notion that I would be training a larger mass of troops to act as a real standing guard for the castle.

>>20779324
i see a high powered demon within our borders, i mention it, and considering that the thing damn near killed one of my waifus, i'm plenty pissed at it and ready to kill

>>20779324
pst, hey bro...[spoilers] don't let those dogs get you bro[/spoilers]

>>20779381
oh the shame, /tg/ finally has spoilers and I fuck up.

File: 1348019885948.png-(77 KB, 400x600, hm3-beta.png)

After dicking around with that herolab thing I bring you something that looks nothing like sir gearheart but would fit a description of him. In short I suck even at cut and past art.

>>20779414

At least you tried.

>>20779381
I swear, I will end you and everything you love. Those damn dogs made me want to go and stab puppies in real life, let alone Dark Souls!
> Totally over it now, just playing it up for lulz.

>>20779350
That'd be the Men-at-arms then. I should probably write something up on our version of the Marian Reforms. Heh... Call it... The Codex Update.

Ah, recruitment day. A wonderful time in my opinion; scaring the daylights out of the youngin’s, and just generally putting on an affront that I don’t get to do often. I woke up that day, warm in my bed with an arm around my side, not wanting to leave the comfortable folds of fabric and the embrace of my Waifu Evette. Begrudgingly, I slumped out of bed and across the worn wooden planks of my home. I rustled the embers of the fire with an iron poker before yawning widely, and walking back to my bedroom to get dressed. I took out a pair of pants and sat on the edge of my bed and pulled a leg through. Leaning back to get the other foot through the opening, I feel back asleep, only partially completing my quest for pants. I woke up to a hand on my chest, poking and prodding me, a faint voice heard through my sleep addled ears;

“Joe. Joe. Giovanni. GIOVANNI. WAKE UP! You have recruits to draft, and you can’t be lat-“

She was not able to finish her statement as my eyes shot open, I completed my pantaloon quest and grabbed my gear and ran out the door. Evette just lay in bed, hand propping up her chin as she gazed out of the room to the open front door.

“Are you at least going to close… the door?”

With a harrumph she scrunched her brow. Why was she surprised…

>>20779493

I ran through the town, tipping my hat and saying my good-mornings, belting on various things, and still climbing into my clothing and equipment as I trotted towards the barrack. I could hear the playful laughs of some of the other waifus as I did so, and I just hoped that the recruits were already in the drill square, and not out in the streets where they may see me. I skidded around a corner, and took the moment to compose myself, straightening my belts, and rustling my equipment to sit as they usually do when I have time to prepare myself. With everything comfortable, I strode into the square, sword at my side and bow across my back. I was greeted with a dissatisfied face from Sir Kasai, my Sergeant-Major of the guard and drill master. I walked slowly in front of the large mass of men and women that stood in the drill square, roughly fifty in number. I was hoping for more, but there was always time to draft new recruits later. These people were from the castle and the surrounding area. I saw young and old, but no one that I deemed unfit.

I addressed the rabble as such, and the first task at hand was to find out the natural positions of these fine… “soldiers.” I had to empty the armory to have enough equipment for everyone to try their hands at everything, for I believe that a person will fight their best when they use a weapon that feels natural to them, and not forced to train with something they struggle with. Naturally, everyone will be trained to fight with many different styles of weapons, but they will be organized into formations depending on their preference.

>>20779498
If no R.Lee.Ermy impression for the troops, with an appropriately awesome 'kettle-hat' helmet, I will be exceptionally disappoint.

>>20779350
So, TeeGee's standing army. Small, professional and dedicated.

Home Guard Regiment
Sir Giovanni, Captain-Colonel
Sir Kasai, Regimental Sergeant-Major

Dragoons
Sir Fearghaile
Sir Perrin, Bearer of the colours
~100 cavalry, a company.

Several companies of Men-At-Arms/Guardsmen, led by Knights and stuffs, around 300-500 men. Includes Castle Guard on rotation.

Light Horse Squadron
~100 men, trained to fight on both horseback and as infantry. Mostly scouts and a fast reaction force, they are lighter armed and armoured force.

>>20779530
Eventually Sir GearHeart starts a little force in 6 A.A. Not that that really maters till I finish that story. I really need to work on only one at a time.

Anyway they are the Combat Monsters, basically after things GearHeart starts teaching people how to fight dirty and prepare for everything. Probably at first just like twenty odd men. Their fighting style is weapon in one hand and magic in the other with a liberal application of gadgets. Also training is very Spartan/Darwinism. Infact I think I am going to put a hold on my current piece and do a little bit about the Combat Monsters.

File: 1348021702216.png-(216 KB, 775x981, 1346094870528.png)

>>20779527

I do not have a kettle hat sir, I am pretty much the /tg/ knight, but with two quivers, a bow and a green scarf.

pic related

>>20779530
Don't forget the Blades, while not organized as line troops, they are very well trained in raiding and ambush tactics. They would serve well as skirmishers if need be and number around a 120. However, in most cases, the vast majority of them are deployed at any one time, normally only leaving a few dozen at the castle for training and reactionary purposes.

I'd love to get a little time with the recruits, either teaching them some basic fieldcraft or fighting, or maybe even for a special little PT session, give me a chance to channel my old Drill Sergeant.

>>20779527
>R. Lee Ermy
>not George S. Patton
Pfft, do you even speech?

http://youtu.be/YlzIPoRbF_A
(don't watch past 5:11)

>no one has written a story about some poor arachnophobe accidentally wandering into spiderfall barrows.

Please? I'm throwing money at my screen but nothing happens.

File: 1348022735563.jpg-(25 KB, 640x480, Alaric Unfinished.jpg)

>>20779117
Alright, I have no way of getting it cleanly from paper to computer, but here's a quick, unfinished sketch I just scribbled. I'll try and get something less fuzzy ready tomorrow, and if people like it I'll probably make a few portraits or something.

>>20779805

I heard there was plenty of arachnophobia going around when they first started exploring Castle Waifu.

>>20779846
Damn, it looks even fuzzier now that I posted it. I swear it looked better five minutes ago, I just need to adjust the camera or something, and I can get something of better quality tomorrow.

Someone give me a list of breakfast foods that /tg/ might have recipes for. Need more foodstuffs.

>>20779874
Pancakes, muffins, several ways to cook eggs, toast, off the top of my head.

>>20779805
Someone already did. He was watching some goats when one wandered off there and he went into a cave after it during a storm and ran into a Drider. Long story short she ended up moving into the castle and taking over part of the basement for her lair.

>>20779874
french toast
waffles
those little toast with the middle cut out and an egg put in things
english muffins
oatmeal
meatbread

>>20779874
Waffles, if someone is willing to make an iron (which they will if I have anything to say about it), Hash browns, maybe bagels, possibly donuts, bacon, sausages, and possibly some fruits

I'll finish the rest of that story tomorrow when I am not dying of starvation, sorry gents.

>>20779888
>>20779900
>>20779902

Add this to the stuff my grandma makes, and I think we have a proper feast.

>>20779915
And cinnamon rolls, if we can get the spice

>>20779934

They better have it.

>>20779894
guess I need to reread the older threads a bit.

>>20780008

That's what I've been working on.

>>20779934
we could probably put it in the rainforests somewhere on the continent, or maybe in the Asia equivalent. The only potential issue I foresee is the question of whether or not corn potatoes and cacao (chocolate) exist on this continent, or are they from the new new world (which won't be discovered for 70+ years, and even then its only one person that makes it there) like on earth

>>20780055

... if we have oversea trade.... I must become a privateer.

>>20779874
Good old fashioned Oatmeal. Put some raisins, applesauce, and cinnamon (sorry chef) in it and it tastes like beauty itself. Don't add too much cinnamon, or it will easily overpower the fruits. Have some toast with homemade bread as a side dish and you can't go wrong. I'd post a recipie, but I need to head off to bed and this is my last post for the night. Perhaps tomorrow afternoon, if anyone's interested.

>>20780079
Raid the elves if you don't mind. They have an active hatred of us, and have actually attacked us in our home area. Everyone else is just terse relations for now.

>>20780102
You have no idea just how interested I am in recipes for all of this food.

>>20780109

I would gladly raid any elven ships as a privateer for the TeeGee Merchant Navy!

>>20780109
>>20780129

The problem with that is we currently don't know of any body of water that borders the Elven lands.

>>20780149
and that the other continent won't be discovered for 70-80 years

File: 1348025337923.png-(130 KB, 512x384, 1342067941288.png)

>>20780180

God dammit. I just want to sail the seas, raiding and pillaging our enemies trade vessels.

>>20780221

There's always the slavers.

File: 1348025752852.jpg-(446 KB, 1500x1000, 1318733488602.jpg)

>>20780231

Do they sail the ocean blue?

>>20780309
are oceans blue in this world?

>>20780309
Yes.

>>20780323
Maybe?

>>20780349

Then Captain Mortimer Black Lives again!

While sorting books earlier today, I stumbled upon a superball of all things. After picking myself up, I pocketed the item and went back to sorting.

In a fit of boredom, I decided to enchant the superball. And while I do not mind having a skylight, the people in the five floors above me might disagree.

Okay, holy shit, I did it. I fucking did it. This little drama bullshit. There will be laughs, there will be cries, there will be feels.

Does anyone wanna proofread before I post it? I'm pretty sure on its quality, but eh, better to doublecheck so that it doesn't end up as QUALITY.

>>20780812

I don't think you want me to proof read it. I somehow managed to change the tense in my story, and I can't figure out of to change it back.

>>20780812
I guess I have a bit of time available to me. Depends on how long it is.

Just post it, after all of the posts you've shared so far, I dare say we trust your writing abilities

File: 1348029558193.jpg-(199 KB, 600x889, 8fc00a8f658012898fe525e2a(...).jpg)

>Alright then, here goes

>>20775030
It’s been a while since I’ve been able to cook in my own kitchen, or, well, do anything at all in my own home with my duties keeping me away. Now that I finally have someone to share the load of party face with, it’s nice to do the mundane for myself again, which is why I’m carrying a pheasant from the butcher.

“Yo Lem, Kikki’s at your place” Gary called as I passed by. Shit doesn’t get by him to easily.

“Really?” Already?

“Yeah, coming from the bar district with one of Jim’s girls. Lilly I think, you know, the one with the horns and the tail?”

“That doesn’t tell me anything, but yeah, I know about Lilly. She still there?”

“Who, Jim’s girl? Nah, saw her walking back the other way a few minutes later. Just thought I’d give you a heads up.”

“Thanks Garebear” I will never get tired of calling him that.

A quick look around found my fair maiden in my bed. The evening sun splashed yellow across her complexion, still tanned from the last time we were in the desert. Her dark, cropped hair played across her soft features, lithe (and clothed) body half covered by the sheets. A slight line of drool darkened a spot in the pillow, features relaxed from sleep. I really couldn’t help but grin.

>Captcha: Midsommer sufaft

>>20781003
I sat down on the bed besides Kikki’s sleeping form carefully as not to disturb her and started running my hand through her soft hair, pulling the stray strands from her face. A wave of calm washed over me, despite my racing heart. I tucked her in and began to remove my hand

“Hnnmm, don’ stop...” Kikki stirred beneath the sheets, alcohol glazing heavy eyes.

“Gotta make dinner, kiddo. Have fun at the bar?”

She nodded sleepily. “Wait, how’d you know?”

“Saw Gary on the way in. I swear he sees everything. Kinda surprised me Lilly was the one dragging you back. Well, not really...”

“Hey, I’m allowed to have friends other than you, you know...” Had she been more alert, she would have been much more biting, probably imply I had no friends other than her. Naps really tend to mellow her out.

“Hmmm, Alright I’m gonna go make food.”

“You want me to help?”

“No, keep napping, I’ll be fine” I didn’t even have to say that much and she seemed to fall right to sleep as I caressed her cat-like ears. I got up and as quietly as I could, I walked out the door, closing it behind me.

File: 1348029648245.jpg-(1.68 MB, 3072x2304, 05-22-2012.jpg)

>>20778974
I've been learning to draw since January, but I'm not that good yet. Pic related is my best work so far, and that took me around two weeks to do. If I'm remembering correctly, anyway.

I might draw something for you guys, but no promises. Besides, I promised my grandmother I'd draw something for her birthday on the 22nd.

File: 1348029742267.png-(1.08 MB, 1161x1534, 8e2926e1cf35d1b4a2ff55acc(...).png)

>>20781020
‘OhDivinesOhDivinesOhDivines, did he see? Did he notice? Jesus, I’d never hear the end of it if he found out. Damnit Lem, why do you have to make me like this. I’ll have to flip the mattress to hide the wet spot.

‘Damnit, why does he have to be like that, it’s not fair. I show up at his place and crash on his bed drunk as a Dwarf and just pats my fucking head like I was just some kid. Ugh, maybe I shouldn’t have gone out with Lilly after all. But she’s right, I gotta do something, I’m just so sick of these mixed signals.’

My thoughts were as panicked as my heart rate. I made sure to get my britches back on and remake the bed after the mattress flip. I flopped back down. “This isn’t like me.”

>>20781041
I drifted in and out of an uneasy, lucid sleep for a time, having strange visions of Lem and not Lem and him kissing me and then shoving a knife it my gut. It was a weird, but somewhere in that strange, alcohol induced delirium I had a thought. What if he wasn’t into me like that? What if I was more of a sister to him than a girl... a waifu. Was I being selfish? Trying to force myself on him?

The smell of roast pheasant brought me to. That’s my favorite dish, but it’s so hard to get and costs a bundle. I walked down and into the kitchen. The table was already set and his good tablecloth was down. The ambient glow of the candles on the table warmed the scene, but I had no idea why.

“Wow, what’s the occasion?”

“Huh? It’s your birthday. Don’t tell me you forgot.” A light chuckle. Oh, so that’s why he’s been so soft on me today.

“Uh...” Actually, with all the work and the chaos going on around, I really did forget it was my birthday.

“Ha! You did. Well, I’ll take the blame for that, go on, sit”

File: 1348030091395.jpg-(130 KB, 420x650, 01720b768ef68fd3c1a8df9c5(...).jpg)

>>20781055
Kikki’s acting differently today, and it’s not because it’s her birthday either, that barely registered for her. I poured us some wine I got and we got down the food. Crushing silence. Something was definitely wrong. Kikki was barely touching the pheasant meat, even though I managed to cook it perfectly.

“The pheasant okay?”

“No, no! It’s perfect.” She took the cue to eat a bit of it. “It didn’t cost too much, did it?”

“It’s rude to ask how much a present costs, you know, and no, the wine cost more, and both were more than worth it.” Speaking of the wine, she was drinking that down pretty fast. I didn’t like where things were going.

More crushing silence. This was really getting to me. “So you hung out with Lilly today, right? How’s she doing?” I watched as Kikki downed her entire second glass in one long swig. “You guys talk about anything interesting?”

A clink and a clang as Kikki brought her glass down on the table. Her face was as red as the wine in her glass. “Lem, do you like me?”

Shit.

“Well of course I like you, you’re my best frie-”

“That’s not what I meant. I mean, do you LIKE me. I mean... well all my friends are waifus and I see them around with their guys and...”

Here she goes. Kikki’s done this before, she gets drunk, asks me this question, talks for a little while, and then apologizes for asking such a stupid question at the end. She really gets self-conscious when she’s drunk. I just have to stay quiet and let her work through it.

“Oh fuck it, I’ve said this all before, I just gotta know. Lem, just what the hell am I to you?”

Shit.

>>20781100
“It’s... It’s complicated.” I know, great reply, right? Kikki, didn’t really get angry, but instead just sort of slouched, defeated.

“Of course. Of-fucking-course.” I could hear quiet sobs.

“Kikki...?”

“D-damnit Lem, WHY?!” Tears were streaming down her face from pleading eyes. “I am n-n-not good enough or something? Is there s-someone else? *hic*” She was starting to hyperventilate a bit.

“K-Kikki, no, nothing like that.”

“Then what? You can stare death down in the face every day, but you can’t face me with a fucking straight answer? You’re the worst!”

I was losing my words. She was hitting a little close to home. “It’s not like that, I-I, I just don’t want to tie myself to you.”

She stopped. Rather than angry, she looked disgusted now. I felt awful as soon as I said it, but I kept going. “If I die, I don’t want you to feel like you need to cling to my memory, I don’t want to leave loose ends.”

“No, I got that.” Kikki spoke more calmly, though she was still tearing. “I just can’t believe that you’d think SO LOW of me. You’ve known me almost five years! What am I, a delicate little flower? Afraid you’ll break me? I’m a Big Girl, Lem. I can handle myself. You know what, fuck you.” Before I could say anything, she unsteadily got up and started moving around the table right at me. I got up and tried to catch her in cast she fell, instead, I got pushed back onto my seat and straddled. “If you’re not going to tie yourself to me, I’ll tie myself to you.”

>>20781111
Kikki’s mouth pressed hard up against mine, her tongue forcing its way into my mouth. A Felim hand made its way down to my hosen and started undoing the thong that held them together. I had to resort to pulling her tail to get her off. I won’t lie, it was kind of kinky, as all hatesex is, but even if this was a good time, she was clearly drunk. It was wrong.

“Kikki, stop it, you’re drunk” By the time she was off, Kikki was bawling.

“W-why the f-fuck do you think, huh? Why the hell w-would I ask you o-only when I’ve had t-too much? It’s cause I’m too CHICKENSHIT to ask you sober. I gotta build myself up to it ‘c-cause I’m afraid I’ll get an - an answer.” She spoke softer this next part, but it cut deeper than anything else, “And so are you...”

She took the wine that was left in my glass and downed it. “Now Lem, Now you gotta choose. Tell me now. If you love me you’ll tell me right now that I’m your waifu. If not I’ll just walk out and I’ll never come back, I’ll never burden you again. C’mon Lem, CHOOSE!”

>>20781111
I have two feels. The first is the natural one, "Kinky". The second is, "Is this a violation of the Bro-code?"

>>20781119
Make that three. Sadness.

>>20781119

Punch Double-Dragon style, carry to bed, make sexy times, problem solved.

File: 1348030560951.jpg-(184 KB, 800x800, 8ac9e8ab1c8a183a2fa99748a(...).jpg)

>>20781119
I did it. I finally did it. I gave Lem an ultimatum. HOLYFUCKWHYDIDIJUSTDOTHAT? Well, it was too late to take it back. And if he said no, it would probably have been for the best.

But he didn’t say anything. Instead, he just gave me a look. One I’ve only seen him make once, which is alot considering how he emotes, a look of a man utterly and completely defeated. “Th-that’s not fair Kikki,” He said, almost too quiet for me to hear.

I couldn’t deal with it anymore. I just slumped down on the floor and bawled. “Y-y-y-you’re not fair...” was all I could manage to get out, but before long I felt a pair of strong arms around me.

“You’re right. I don’t deserve you. Look at me, making a girl cry on her birthday.”

“D-d-don’t talk d-down to me...”

“I wouldn’t imagine. I’m sorry, can I keep you wondering just one more night?”

“Hmmm?”

“I’ll have your answer in the morning, and then you can do as you like. Is that alright.”

“I guess...” Now look who the defeated one is.

“You can stay here for the night, do you need me to help you up?”

“No, I’m fine” I let Lem lift me to my feet anyway. It wasn’t even that late, but I felt completely drained.

“Sleep wherever, I’ll see you in the morning.” And then my heart raced as Lem planted a kiss on my lips and shooed me to the hallway.

File: 1348030610715.jpg-(502 KB, 1800x1200, Knights.jpg)

Sir Giovanni,Sir Gearheart,Sir Alaric

Hmmmm... now I'm wondering if I should just leave it here on a cliffhanger or if I should give you the last post for the end...

>>20781179
GLORIOUS

>>20781003
My face when all my girls have horns and two have tails.
My face when I don't have a face for this feel

File: 1348030804626.jpg-(28 KB, 600x601, 133139298537.jpg)

>>20781179

Brilliant. I love it. Quivers are in an odd place, but thats beside the point of its greatness. Thankyou a big huggy bunch anon.

>>20781192
I dunno, man.
>>20781179 looks like a face to me.

>>20781179
You sir are a gentleman and a scholar

>>20781179
Ohhh, nice! I'm a bit jelly, the knights get all the glory, but whatever, nice to know we have drawfaggs about at any rate.

File: 1348031139874.jpg-(402 KB, 700x979, f1c3df77efc8de9678f277efb(...).jpg)

>screw it, let's do this.

>>20781171
Lem’s bed felt good to wake up in. The windows point east so that when the morning light filters in, it warms and wakes you. Lazing in the morning sun a bit, recovering from yesterday, I heard a rapping at the door, not that pleasant for a hangover, but I felt, well, not good, but relieved, because I knew exactly who was on the other side of that door.

Lem tried hiding what he was holding, a small ornate box. He also tried saying something: “Kikki, I-”

I wouldn't have any of it. I grabbed him and I kissed him, and more importantly he reciprocated. That was all the answer I needed.

“Kikki, but what about -”

“I know what’s in the stupid box, Lem. Now get your sweet ass over here and fuck me.”

>GOOD END

>>20781271
And that's a wrap. Glad to finally be done with that.

Thoughts? Concerns? Opinions? Undying declarations of love and devotion?

>>20781271
YAY!

This made me tear up a bit.

>>20781283
>Concerns?
So who won the pool?

>>20781271

So... Kikki is a catgirl.. does that mean she... fucks like a Tiger?

>>20781271

She went from timid to blunt overnight.
I like it.

>>20781271
I think this may cause Lilly to catch the cupid bug.
>>20781317
Frustration, Alcohol, and Succubi advice can have that effect.

Sir fearghaile.... I must say... Your story left me with some serious feels... As I anxiously awaited your post, repeatedly slamming my refresh button, I admit I was conflicted, will the noble ambassader finally confess his love? Or will he cave to the pressure, for certainly this is the scariest thing he has had to endure.

When I finished your story I couldn't help but physically root for fearghaile, having finally conquered his greatest enemy, his own fear of commitment.

Good job on a splendid story my good sir!

rolled 41 = 41

>>20781271
>>20781295
i don't know but i swear if it's lilly i'm calling shit, i thought we weren't allowed to interfere and she gets kikki drunk in his bed. if i knew we were allowed to do that i would have just slipped them both some aphrodisiacs and locked them in a room

alternatively, roll a d%, highest roll wins

>>20781344
I think Harbinger won.

>>20781283

Molto Bene, Sir Fearghaile. I had the feels, and then more feels, and now I feel good.

Good feels.

rolled 60 = 60

>>20781344
Never heard that rule. Besides it wasn't the being drunk, it was the advice. Also rolling even though it is ultimately up to the Aurthor.

Now I feel the urge to write about some big brown elf boobies...

>>20781385

Hmm?

What?

Did someone say anything about brown elves, and boobies?

I happen to have a brown elf waifu you see, and this is extremely relevant to my interests.

If it is alright with you all, I would like to join in this story as well. I have had the itch to write since thread one but due to....personal(read as: confidence) issues, I have delagated myself to lonesome lurker. I hope anything I add will meet your standards of quality and if not... We'll cross that bridge when we get to it.

>>20781344
>>20781295
Fatwelder got the biggest cut. Changed his bet that same day for that day, who would have guessed?,

Lady Samantha called in a 2 week spread the moment Lem left. Called it "women's intuition"

Lilly has a cut pending if the ceremony happens the next day of union.

Everyone else who rolls under 20 after this post gets a return on their bet as multiple of their roll. Sound good?

Oh, and those who bet against them get laughed at and made fun of.

rolled 20 = 20

>>20781407
Welcome aboard, and don't worry, can't be as bad as some of the stuff I've written. Some times it feels like I can't even into english

>>20781412

I didn't even know people were betting on something.

rolled 26 = 26

>>20781426
I take it 20 doesn't count as under 20

>>20781426

Hopefully, I have a weird style of writing, I picture it all in my mind then display it in all its descriptive goodness. However, when I look at it I always feel as if I have no idea how to proof read...

>>20781432
this is TeeGee, we bet on damn near everything

>>20781407
bro, I have confidence issues in spades, join the club and share your tale.

>>20781456
No, that'll count. Lilly probably changed your bet too.

>>20781466

Yeah man, I am no good at writing, yet I've written like 9,000 words for this thing.

>>20781466

Writing isn't exactly my thing either.

>>20781482

Sounds like a plan then!

However, seeing as it is 12:30am where I am and work in the morning...my tale will have to begin at a bit later, see you then!

>>20781497
Good point. That does sound like her. Also amazing story man.

>>20781511
I despise writing
Still probably gonna end up doing it for you guys again though

mfw I get happy drunk and start thinking it's a good idea to try and whip up a picture of Patcheye staring through his spyglass in MS paint, get halfway through and suddenly look at what I'm doing and am no longer so happy, my face when I wont post this face under pain of death. Now I feel bad for making fun of the sonic fanartists.

File: 1348034929594.jpg-(292 KB, 1800x1200, Newstowries.jpg)

"What the matter honey?"


"Mom... I can't sleep. Can you tell me a story?"

>>20781284
>>20781317
>>20781337
>>20781361
>>20781540
I thank you all for the vote of confidence.

Next story I'm probably gonna tackle is a bit back, covering the first time Lem experienced that "defeat". Not diplomancing, Quest time.

I might also later detail what happened that night and maybe that morning

>>20781839
YES

Just noticed, this hasn't been archived yet.

>>20781953

Just archived, vote it up :)

> Short little something before Sleep.
Today was an important day in my book. After the Ork incident, the war with the Elves, and encounters with bands of Mirthterrah soldiers, I had decided to do my part. And since a group of people can get more done than just one person. I had put out a call for anyone who wanted a chance to prove themselves. I got a decent response of sixty willing individuals of various levels of experience. Most of them were natives, some where a few of the Outrealmers that never really found a place for themselves.

“Listen up, this will not be easy, most of you will not pass my test, some of you may not make it. But I promise you this, you stick to it an you will fear no ever in the valley of shadow and death for you will be the baddest mother fucker in the valley, provided that I am not in the same fucking valley.

The fighting style can be summed up as follows: brutal, quick, to the point, and cheap and dirty as hell. It is not a style for sport nor game, its sole purpose is to make sure you can kill anything that moves. Today we will be covering one lesson and one lesson only. It is quiet possibly the most important lesson you will ever learn. Fear is your lesson, I have three basic rules I tell everyone who asks me for advice. Never let them see you sweat, Always keep them guessing, And always be ready for any thing.

File: 1348036627053.jpg-(775 KB, 1200x1200, 1331948712492.jpg)

>>20779223
Looks like someone found Tarkus's cave. Well, now you know why it's off limits.

Maybe we should put a sign up so people will quit going in there.

>>20779530
I'll take a unit of heavy swords if it's the same to you, but only about 30 or so. Much more than that and I'd have to get subordinates to control them properly. That and I play too much TW: Shogun II to pass up on copying something from it.

Also this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lTs6a0ORdQU should be our army's marching song.

>>20781271
This is the kind of thing I stick around these threads for, for4 the catgirls, and the doggirls, and the...well you get the point.

>>20782034
That's when I used a illusion spell to disappear and Lilly popped in behind them with a flash of smoke and flame, brimstone filling the air. She was dressed in what could only be called a over the top dominatrix outfit.
“PUNY MORTALS I SHALL ENJOY FEASTING ON YOUR SOULS!”
I started another illusion that darkened the sky and added some clouds and lightning. For extra effect. I was actually rather pound of the little group, as a good number of them stood their ground. They were hopelessly out matched as long as she had air superiority. There were only a few who had any sort of ranged skills. The lightning bolts and fireballs were controlled enough so that no one was getting to hurt, even though the bombardment was near constant. Eventually this big burly Giant picked a Felim girl and threw her at Lilly. Lilly flew up to dodge out of the way, but the Felim girl pulled a net out of a pouch on her belt and threw it at Lilly. The net tangled up Lilly's wings and she fell to the ground. This evened out the odds a bit. They swarmed her like gang-bangers on a bucket of fried chicken. Luckily for her and unluckily for them conservation of ninjustu was in full effect. And really it wasn't far, what with super human strength and plenty of training in the martial arts. It was nice to have a sparing partner that could go at my level. Back in the Oldworld most people just didn't have the drive or did know enough. Course Lilly preferred ground fighting over standing, to her it was foreplay.

So when the majority of them where on the ground I stepped in.
“That's enough for today class. Be back tomorrow with a plan for how you could have dealt with this scenario, 'cept Colossus and Wolverine here, you two I want to talk to.”

>>20782039
The others left and I invited the two to join me for a drink. Lilly had already changed into her “Hostess Outfit” as she called it, a simple red dress. She was standing behind me and I could just about see the evil grin she was giving the two.
“So whats your names?”
“Gomez”
“They call me Aerlo.”
“So Aerlo and Gomez, tell me whose plan was it?”
“It was mine. It and variations of it have been growing popular amoung Felim ever since Sir Fearghaile and Kiki The Flash did it with a shield.”
“Ah yes I've heard the story. Well congrats on passing the first test with flying colors. Now if you wouldn't mind tell me a bit about yourselves.”
“Well I worked a bit as a travailing dancer and acrobat before this, I had heard the stories about TeeGee and the Outrealms and since I happened to be in the area I stopped by to check it out. After a few days in the city I was really impressed and wanted to join up, that is when I saw you poster. I am good with a bow and even better with my daggers,” She said as she pulled two daggers seamingly out of nowhere.”
“Nothing up your sleeves but cold hard steel eh?”
“Close, quick, and safe is my motto.”
“I like the way you think kid. Now big guy what about you?”
“Me Giant, named Gomez. Don't talk much. Want to be a hero.”
“Well I can work with that.”
We chatted for a bit and I got a better feel for their personalities. After a short while I felt it was time for the next part.
“Now that you've had a short rest I would like you two to do a little hand to hand work with Meina.”
“I'm up for anything.”
“Me ready.”
“Careful what you say honey, a girl might get ideas.” Lilly said, her eyes sending a message most primal.
“Well you two get ready while I go get Meina, I didn't think anyone would do so well on day one.”

>>20782046
I went and got Meina from the back garden, its where she spent most of her relaxation time. Don't blame her the Orchard was coming in nicely and the flowers were in full bloom.
“Hey Meina, you feel up to a little work out?”
“Yeah I am feeling a bit better now.”
Meina had been acting odd for about a week now, throw in odd eating habits and morning nausea and it didn't take someone with my analytical powers to figure out what was going on. Though it had only been a week, could just be a bug. And if you believe that I have a bridge to sell you.

I escorted Meina out to the training yard.
“Ok listen up the rules are simple. No weapons, no magic. Last person standing is the winner, Oh yes its a three way battle.

>>20782055
The battle started off like a heard of turtles. Meina just stood there in a crouched stance, making a come at me gesture with her hand. The other two spread out and were sizing Meina up, but kept giving flickering looks at the other. Finally they made their move and charged her. Meina did a somersault under Aerlo and kicked out into a handspring, her feet coliding with Aerlo's baby maker. She fell to the ground hands between her thighs.
“Hey Meina don't rough her up to much, she needs that.”
“Lilly be quite unless you want one two.” Meina said as she ducked a powerful punch that sent a strong gust of wind across the room.
“Nice try big guy, but your have to do better to catch me unaware. Living with Lilly keeps you on your toes.”
Thats when Aerlo kicked Meina in the shins sending her to the ground. Gomez jumped into the air, going for a body slam. Meina rolled out of the way and Gomez landed with a painful sounding thud. By this time Aerlo had gotten to her feet and was dancing around the ring like, well a dancer/acrobat. She was wasting to much energy though, to many unnecessary movements. She would run out of steam quickly at this rate. Gomez was not making so many pointless movements but he lack any form of grace and telephoned in every move he made. In any normal fight they would be more than capable. Against a battle hardened adventurer not so much. They lasted far longer than they had any right to. But it ended with the oldest trick in the book.

Aerlo and Gomez had backed off from Meina and had gotten on either side of her, once more they rushed. Meina countered with a split jump kick to their faces. Ouch looks like Aerlo got a busted nose and Gomez lost some teeth.

>>20782058
After they had a few minutes to recover. I had a talk with them.
“Ok first off, you both telegraph your moves way to much.”
“I thought with my dancing it would cover it up.”
“Yes and no, your dancing covered up most movements, but your eyes gave everything away. Same goes for you big guy. Also you over exaggerate your moves. Yes more room to move means more power, but it takes longer to close the gap and you give your opponent more time to react. Now about your dancing, you waste to much energy on pointless movements. Every move should have a point. Not telling you to stop just tone it down. Finally you two did your best when you worked togeher and I am proud of you guys for not attacking each other. Now go and get, tomorrow we start magic training and It will be harder.

That was the first of many more days of training for the Combat Monsters. I would whip them into shape but it would take time. But that day I knew that Aerlo and Gomez were bound for greatness.
>and thats it hopefully I'll finish the tale of the snow queen on the marrow

>>20782046
>Sir Fearghaile and Kiki The Flash did it with a shield
Oho~ I don't know if I remember this one. Be sure to remind us if tonight is too late.

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"If I tell you a story, do you promise to sleep?"

"Yes, Mom I promise."

"Do you wanna know how i got this scar?"

>>20782055
Wait, didn't Lilly take Meina as her own Waifu. Would this imply, if her condition is the one you are hinting at, that Lilly is the cause?

>>20782153
not sure where this is going but warmly waiting.

File: 1348039973501.jpg-(388 KB, 1800x1200, Newstowries2.jpg)

"Back then, Mommy was quite the naughty girl. Mommy would burn entire cities, Light up towers on fire to roast the wizard inside, eat livestock, demand sacrifices from the villagers and kidnap princesses."

"..."

"Ah, I miss those days."