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>>20666515
>mfw
Storytime!

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As our saviors, the Felim provided food, medicine (strange as it was, it worked), and information. It turns out that we had been summoned to an entirely new realm, one of dragons and magic, one most of us relegated to our imagination. As with the original summoning, some despaired, others hopped up excited for the new adventure before them. I? Well, there was no use sitting in terror, though this change of residence wasn't exactly what I had planned for my life.

Once we had stabilized our food and grown stronger, the ones with greater leadership qualities had come together. While there were still plenty of weaker kids, many among our number had experience in trades: chemistry, smithing, and physics. Others were natural-born leaders, able to keep morale up just enough to get them through the day. It seems that some of the men had taken a liking to the female of their Felim messiahs, and as they seemed at a majority female (and quite matriarchal in structure), this was not only accepted but encouraged by their leadership. I suspect they were just happy to have humans who didn't treat them like utter shite as I had heard about the attitudes towards them in human cities. It was strange to them for humans (or any male of any species) to dote upon them like our companions did.

It was with this in mind that the first of us, Giovanni as he called himself, stated we should settle down here and begin an order of knights. An order of Knights! As if someone calling himself "Sir Lancelot" would suddenly become right hand of the realm! Aside from the obvious problems of legitimacy, where would we get our arms? Our armor? Our Steeds? The very skills with with which to wield them?

Well, what happened after that, it frankly surprised me.

>>20666597

Excellent. Keep going, though, give credit where credit is due Fearghaile, Sir Earrubber was the man with the devotion, I merely volunteered to guard the home.

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>>20666597
It had turned out our Felim friends had wanted to, if not properly settle down, create a central hub for their trading, and were willing to help us realize it if we could provide the manpower to build and protect it from simple threats. Our smiths, handymen, and physicists were capable of overseeing the repairs to our new dwelling (which some of the men had taken to calling "Castle Waifu" in half-jest) and in two spring months, I had not seen so much done with the most advanced machinery. Light spellcasters within the Felim ranks were of course a help, but the revitalized morale of the former internet dwellers was truly what brought the project along, including the more... intense relations with the Felim.

But of course, such progress did not go without notice. Clearcutting some of the trees for grazing pasture and agriculture, eight Felim and Human were found dead near the forest, peppered with the same arrows that had found our brave poachers during the hard months.

>>20666689
Im not Sir Earrubber, but I still find it hilarious that this whole thing was started by my determination to rub some elf ears.

>>20666728

Rubbing ears and thirst for adventure.

why am i F5ving so hard right now?

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>>20666720
As fate would have it, a minor Elvish kingdom was near and very upset at our progress, and in two weeks after the attack, there would not be a more prepared force in the realm. Yes, somewhat loose fitting armor and only six weeks of practice with the blade. We marched with fire in our hands AND hearts. Many had not more than six weeks experience holding the blade, of which I was a help considering my previous experience with the sword. Expecting us to run back and cower in our citidel, the Elvish forces had no idea what was coming for them, and so they foolishly did nothing as the scouts told of our massing. The forest raged that night. Every Evlish dwelling was ransacked. Every male was slaughtered, old and young. The women were gathered together and, this part was what bothered me most... they were alright with it? The Elves made most elegant crafts, but their society was less so. Agressively patriarical, women were treated as cattle and oppressed at every level, even though many of them were skilled artisans and farmers. They gladly joined our ranks in exchange for their expertise in craft and agriculture.

With this new influx of population, talk of "Waifus" had risen, especially with all the fraternization that was happening. The doting the men put upon the Elf women was new to them, and most welcome. The gratitude given back was enough to stoke more than a few hearts. but this wouldn't end with just the women of the Wood Elf Kingdom (which we would later learn was called "Selliik" or "First Front" in their tongue).

>>20666689
Yes, yes, of course, I'm just recalling your first suggestion.

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>>20666786
Well yes. No life is complete without ADVENTURE!
>>20666823
Because you don't have 4chanX

>>20666840
more sense in one fragment than i have seen in a pagraphical sea of replies on this board. thank you.

>>20666823

Because you haven't noticed the Auto-update button at the bottom of the window?

>>20666835

As long as I have my trusty sword and flintlock rifle, and my elven waifu, you are telling an amazing story sir.

>>20667004

I thought you were still searching for "the one"?

OM NOM NOM NOM MORE STORY! Love it so far!

>>20667017

Oh, that's the plan sir. but I love them them elves

>>20667052

Won't that make your other waifus feel inferior?

>>20667081

I am a one Waifu man. I only need one.

>>20667081
Not if he only has one waifu. Not every Harem Knight needs to actually start a harem, nor does every man become a Harem Knight. Some may want the peaceful life of a town guard and the doting love of a single elven waifu.

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The surrounding woods, now out of the oppressive thumb of its Elven lord (I would know, he fell at my blade) came a small assortment of humanoid tribes. "Savage" by their technology and magic, but largely understanding our speak (also known as "common") and having all manner of problems to be solved, from exploring ruins to clearing out "cursed" caves. Trading caravans too brought more of the outside world beyond our little city in the woods, "Castle Waifu". By the next winter, we had multiplied our ranks with runaway female Elves, and species of all sorts who come to find the peculiar brotherhood of humans who have no prejiduce towards non-humans. After eight months of conditioning and adventuring, the core of our new society, "The Knights Harem", were a fighting force to be feared, as scouting parties of aggressive Elves soon found (they have no net attempted an invasion, though it seems that Elvish Lords do not tend to like each other very much). And the rest? Well, let's say that not a single resident in our new lands went the least bit hungry after our end-year harvest.

Such stories can only remain unnoticed for so long, and so the nearest kingdom, the Realm of Mirthterrah (named so after its patron god), who's abandoned citidel we now occupy, has sent missive and demanded our presence in their High King's court, presumably to demand what we are doing occupying "their" citidel.

Oh God, it's like the old 4chan Archipelago threads except less autisms and kind of adorable.

>>20667112
>>20667098

No no, far as I can tell, Giovanni is still searching for his "one", hinted by his "that's the plan". If the plan was complete, he would have said "that was the plan" or something else.

Next, he said he loves elves. More than his one. Why couldn't he say he loved his elf if he only has one waifu? Is Giovanni sleeping with other elves behind the Harem Knights' back?

>>20667154
>No no, far as I can tell, Giovanni is still searching for his "one", hinted by his "that's the plan". If the plan was complete, he would have said "that was the plan" or something else.
Clearly he meant in relation to the storys timeline.
>Next, he said he loves elves. More than his one. Why couldn't he say he loved his elf if he only has one waifu?
Elves the race. As in his waifu is an elf because he loves elves. That had to be willful obtuseness on your part.
> Is Giovanni sleeping with other elves behind the Harem Knights' back?
Do not make such accusations so lightly, outlander.

>>20667154

Sir I care not for your slanderous wording of my current situation within our kingdom. I have not said that I do indeed have a waifu, but that I am looking for that *particular* elven Waifu. The One for me.

>>20667154

I think we got another spy here.

There are no rules saying you can't have two elven waifus, just like there are no rules saying you can't have human waifus

>>20667266

What do you do for Teegee, Jim?

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>>20667126
It also got pretty brotastic last thread.

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Waiting for op. I guess I can start writing my own faggotry in the meantime. It will probably conflict with ops, but oh well.

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>>20667362

By all means! Just pick a different time frame, or perhaps some tales of the Adventuring knights or something.

>>20667281
I mostly build machines and the like, but i have been known to make some less-than-sane creations, like the belt-fed shotgun, hence the title

>>20667395

Did you learn from the orcs?

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>>20667117
And so I am on the road to Midyahs, their capital, the "City of Gold" as they call it. And I am still not sure why it is me.

My company well know that I am the dissenter among the Knights, the only one who as every spoken a harsh word against their blind fraternization with other races. Not that we should shun them or treat them as the other humans apparently do in this world, but there are dangers to these things, both known and unknown. There might be incompatibility with each very touch! Even by look if stories of petrifying gazes were to be true.
Not that I am completely innocent of this. Even as I write this (in ink and quill of gnomish and elvish make, respectively), my own travel companion makes light and soft conversation, conversation that makes my heart at ease, light even. Kikki (her name is unprnounceable by my tongue, though I have tried, this is the closest), one of the Felim who encountered us cold and starved, well I would be fool and a lier to say she wasn't a light for me in my darkest moments, even after I killed that Elf-king right before his daughter without so much as a blink. It does make me wonder what sort of man I would be without her soft touch ---

>>20667412

Oh my, that is just adorable.

Cheers to you Sir Fearghaile, excellent work so far.

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>>20667412
Well look at me, I'm writing as a blubbering idiot composing sonnet lines to the local bar wench! Though still, her insistence I go and she with me pushed me into this, so I have not had time to question my assignment. I suppose it might be simply to be rid of me, as the youngers consider me harsh and my more terse attitude seems to somehow put people in a bad mood. Maybe they're even hoping this trip will loosen me up a bit. If this city is anything like I expect it to be, HA! Not a chance.

Though that will not for a second waver my heart. Despite all my reservations, and despite plenty thinking I have an unmoveable rod stuck up my arse, I think we've done something good here, and I don't for a minute plan to let anyone change that. Us "Outrealmers" can hold our own, especially since that coven of dragon-maidens has pledged their support not a fortnight ago. I pitty any general who marches their forces on TeeGee territory today.

-- Abridged from the Short Memoirs of the Fearful Gale, Year 02 AGS (After Grand Summons)

>>20667516

Sleep with her.

Can any of those so inclined have even husbandos?

>>20667404
No


maybe

>>20667570

Go for it.

>>20667570

Yeah, naturally. 'Twas discussed previously.

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>>20667516

Excellent, great work m'lad. Perhaps those that would be inspired to write other thing about our Kingdom of Teegee, and castle Waifu would do so.

Hell, even I am now entertaining the thoughts of grand tales of adventure and life within our home.

so did the guy with the useful infographics from the last thread ever upload them?

>>20667625

Do so. Let word of our kingdom spread. Let Teegee be known as a Kingdom that does not judge.

>>20667412

You have a beautiful waifu in Kikki, Sir Fearghaile.

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>>20667570
While we did loose two thousand in that first two months (I do not wish to describe how the rest survived it, thankfully, most do not know), there are still plenty among our ranks where I simply could not keep track of everyone. I'm sure that those who would consent exist and have wandered into our fold. It's not as though it's against the rules...

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This thread is adorable..

>>20667734

It makes sense when you think about it. When you embrace your enemies and found a kingdom upon mutual kindness, how can you go wrong?

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>>20667786

Biological diseases.
Distrust among splinter groups that spreads.

>>20667807

Sex and waifus conquers all.

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>>20667816
>>20667786

More writefaggotry you two!
I AM ENJOYING THIS IMMENSELY.

>>20667835

I am not gifted in the art of the written word. Giovanni might provide something, however.

>>20667816

Indeed, any that seek the fall of our kingdom are louts of the most chaotic evil.

>>20667807
i know thats gunnerkrigg court, but i can't remember that purple character, is that a porn spinoff or something?

>>20667877
Shes a one off character whos a friend of that dude what makes everything ordered and teleport girl.

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>>20667877

I honestly don't know.
I saw the picture on /tg/ once and fucking saved that shit because I liked it.
I found it very fitting to this thread.
Sorry I do not know where it comes from.

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>>20667877
That's one of Parley's upperclassman friends, which is shooped using the character reversed out of the fourth frame.

>>20667920

I can understand the misinterpretation of our kingdom's ideals, but I assure you there is no rape to be had in the glorious land of Teegee!

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>>20667957

I don't think you realize.
It's not rape if its an elf.

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Alright, my interpretation of the first thread was a little bit different and not as inspired and a little softer than op’s, but I was writing it since last thread so here goes nothing!

As I sat in Castle Waifu’s feasthall, I was too excited to eat all the splendid food laid out before me. I was jittery, for I had just finished my training and been inducted into the Harem Knights. Tomorrow I would go on my first quest and perhaps even find my very own waifu! But I was nervous, for mostly outrealmers surrounded me now and for the first time in my life since I immigrated to the Kingdom of Teegee had I felt out of place, as if this order existed for the outrealmers alone and I was intruding. Of course, they would have none of it when I tried to voice my concerns. Sir Bearington, a broad axewielding bear of a man with a statue of a minotaur adorning his helmet and one of the first founders, clapped me on my back and forced me back into my seat.

“Relax boy! The pursuit of a waifu is every man’s birthright! Did we ever tell you how we started all this mess?”

“W-well no milord, but I imagine it is a glorious t-tale.” I barely managed to stammer. I am not afraid to admit how much that burly man intimidated me.

“Oh ho ho! How right you are, lad!” Sir Bearington said whilst roaring with laughter “And how dreadfully wrong, too! Sit there and let me tell you of how the Kingdom of Teegee came to be!” I sank into my chair as Bearington’s Minotaur waifu served us another round of ale and sidled up next to the man, as eager as I was for the storytime.

>>20667996

Indeed I understand this is a belief held by many, but we have much more than Elves here.

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>>20668031
“As you all know, we outrealmers we brought here by some sorta bastard wizard from a realm far away. A realm where such things as elves and magic are but the daydreams and fancies of bored minds and where hard labor was a rarity rather than the norm. We don’t know why he brought us here or where he went after that, but knowing wizards, it’s because the old codger doesn’t have any sense of right or wrong and simply didn’t give a shit! So there we were in the midst of a vast wood with little more than the clothes on our back, most of us completely out of our element with only a vague idea of the land we now inhabited. After getting over the initial shock, we immediately began making plans. Some brought with them knowledge from the Far Realm and sought to replicate old technologies, others wanted to use their knowledge to impress the courts and land a job with the nobles, still others were more than willing to resign themselves to a peasant’s life. Then a voice spoke up from amidst the crowd, a voice that came from a man who was not the strongest or cleverest man, but arguably the most determined. A voice that spoke the words that changed all our lives forever:

‘I’m going to find an elf girl and rub her ears.’

Thus was born Sir Gavran Earstroker, Rubber of Elf Ears. Some contested this plan, asking him how he was going to do it or what he would do if it got him killed, what if it was considered rape or against elven culture, but he was resolute. He would find an elven maiden that caught his fancy, he would romance the shit out of her, and then he would rub her ears to his life’s content. Nothing else about our new life mattered to him (Sir Gavran looked embarrassed by this bit, which only seemed to amuse the brown skinned elf who was nestled comfortably in his lap).

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I write these memoirs in an attempt to record the goings on around me, and to document the marvels of what has transpired in the last few years. I was a fan of the fantasy realms that many others before me had been dreaming of and creating in their minds, and upon that baleful (and fateful) day whence me and so many like me had been transported to this realm, everything I knew had been changed forever—but you all already know about that.

Today I am recalling my first few months as a guard around our citadel.

We had begun to scrape together our meagre supplies in an attempt to feel useful to the unbelievably kind Felim that took us in, and we finally started to have a sense of a real community among us. Some had fashioned crude weapons to defend ourselves, some had found things to trade for more sophisticated. We had some among our ranks who were knowledgeable in the practical arts such as smithing and farming, and even some novice engineering. As for myself, I picked up a hammer and watched the surrounding forests. I didn't know at that point that I would be one of the few that stuck it out at home, and did not gain the fame or glory to come, nor the hordes of Waifus and loot, but I guess it was in my stars that day.

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>>20668047
Strangely, the planning and the discussions became much more agreeable and friendly from that point. Some teased Gavran about his obsession with obtaining an ‘IRL elf waifu’, a concept left over from the Far Realm, but for the most part, everyone began working together with a single mind, planning to follow our dreams just like Gavran and go adventuring. Those who desired to make guns and weapons did so for the sake of adventurers and the homesteaders helped establish a place for us to live. What started out as a joke soon became our unifying motivation. After all, what man doesn’t want a waifu?

Not long after and thanks to some trading with nearby villages, we had a proper adventuring party. We even cast aside our old names to symbolize our abandonment of our old lives. Ironically, we did not even get to go out to quest for Gavran’s waifu, as all the din and bustle had brought a tribe of elves to our humble camp, seeking to inquire what all the fuss was about and fearing that we were gearing up for war. Needless to say, Gavran jumped at this opportunity fortune had gifted him with and explained our plight to the elves, endearing them to our cause and earning us a guide.

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>>20668074
And the rest, as they say, is history. We went questing, we ransacked dungeons and romanced monsters, we used the loot to spruce up the camp and do it all again. Soon, Camp Waifu became Fort Waifu became Castle Waifu and a village became a town became a city became a kingdom. So rest easy feast well, lad! Tomorrow is your first day as a Harem Knight, and you need all the good food and rest you can get! For your waifu is waiting for you out there, calling you to adventure! And tomorrow, you answer that call!”

A new vigor surged through as I knocked back a swig of ale and joined in the revelry. Yes, this was the life I wanted! The life every man deserved! One of adventure and romance! Mystery and peril! Loot and waifus! Yes, tomorrow I was to be a Harem Knight, and I would make damned sure I was good enough be considered one of this prestigious order! So caught up in my own thoughts was I that I was caught completely unawares by another clap on the back and hearty laugh by Sir Bearington. I spluttered ale everywhere as he exclaimed.

“And if you’re lucky, you might be answering that call more than once, do ho ho ho!”

Oh, so tempted to do a writefaggotry. Never done creative writing for pleasure though, this'll be interesting.

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>>20668047

>Brown skinned elf
>Delicious chocolate elves.

This setting just got x4 better.

>>20668130

It is the best setting.

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>>20668130
No setting is complete without Brown Elves.

Teegee's National Anthem.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4nyHPIcbn88

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>>20668148
>>20668144

>>20668144
Its nothing but high adventure and waifus, of course its the best setting. Its astoundingly adorable, too.

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>>20667835
>>20667865
>>20667874
Well, if you must know, I learned exactly why I had been chosen as Envoy on that very trip, though there may be some details that we Knights TeeGee tend to... conveniently forget? Our peace with Mirthterrah isn't exactly rainbows and unicorn farts, though at the moment stable. Shall I regale the tale, or would it best be to keep it under wraps for the security of the state?

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>>20668155

>>20668174

Sing us a song, piano man.

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>>20668174

>Questioning whether or not to continue story time.

MY GOD MAN DON'T STOP.

Though I would play the FUCK out of this if it was a DnD setting.

>>20668179
>handheld waifu.gif

>>20668198
>Harem Knight Beserker.jpg

>>20668217

Yes, Sir Lennex The Crimson Tide was indeed one of our kingdom's staunchest protectors. This is just another of many reasons that none dare trifle with our land, for their is none more powerful than a man protecting the honor of his Waifu!

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All it needs now is monster-girls!

>>20668293

Have you not been keeping with the adventure, my friend? For there are monstergirls aplenty!

http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/20660866/

>>20668293
Last thread did, we just didn't discuss them much in this one.

>>20668324

This thread is for stories from the brave Harem Knights of Teegee.

>>20668338

Which means ask them to include stories about the monstergirls they met.

>>20668324

You speak the truth, but these have been mostly personal tales. The knights that wrote them clearly preferred more humanoid races than not.

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>>20668120

Any writers out there got some advice? I'm finding this harder than expected.

>>20668057
Though primitive in comparison to the Old Realm, it was quite more advanced and rare in this one. Operating on a cartridge based single action mechanism; it was truly a unique and terrifying beast to behold. I pleaded with the merchant, offered him everything I owned for it, but he wanted nothing I could give. Crestfallen, I returned to aid the women in their hunt for specific things, unknowing that someone had watched my ordeal.

I had returned to my modest home by the walls to find a long object wrapped in a green cloth, a small note scribbled elegantly upon a piece of parchment.

“Protect us well.”

Was all that it said, but I could tell that it was an elven hand that had written the note. I uncovered the rifle, and a pouch of ammunition. It confused me; I thought “Who would have done this for me?” I had no Waifu of my own, and not everyone would give up the great amount of wealth needed to purchase this from the merchant. I begun to think that maybe, just maybe, the one for me was already within my reach, but I just couldn’t see her.

>>20668338
Thats what I said. There has just been a lack of monstergirls in the storytimes.
>>20668355
Bearington had a Minotaur waifu, though.

>>20668362

Woops, that is part 2. Read this one first! SORRY!


Most Knights regale the others with their tales of adventure and excitement. Slaying foul beasts, saving their women, ensuring the freedom and equality of those they find. Righteous stuff if you ask me. After we had erected some walls fit for defense, we set in the long months of adventure. Many of the Outrealmers left, as their hearts lusted for the excitement and thrill of wandering, while I and a select few remained to guard our new home. It was a solemn duty, no one said thank-you because we never asked for gratitude, and we viewed ourselves just the same as everyone else in TeeGee. Yes, we didn’t bring back the mountains of wealth, nor the refugee counts of other females they had encountered, but we kept everyone safe, and that was all that mattered.

It was quite some time before traders began to bring us exotic items and wealth from distant lands, and upon one particular occasion I was helping some of the fellow knights Waifus to shop for things. A merchant from the far eastern lands was bearing something that I would have never dreamt I’d see again. As I approached the small man knew what I sought and held it up to my grasping hands.

A Firearm.

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>>20668184
Very well, Earrubber, but don't blame me if we get another complaining Emissary for spreading vile rumors...

It was our first day in the Golden City,which certainly does live up to its name, well, as long as you’re in the innermost walls. Everything else is rather wooden and granite and smells distinctly of squalor. I could see the eyes on me. My style of dress was rather… unorthodox, especially in this city. Then again, when you mix Elven, Felim, and 21st century earth nerd fashion, spun by spider-folk no less, you get something a bit out of the ordinary. To be certain, I did not fit in. What bothered me more were the eyes on my companion. While my dress was as likely to draw awe as ire, Kikki brought instant distrust. The realization of this for her seemed familiar, but all the same alien. Being with my merry band certainly is a difference.

But I digress. Once we reached the gold and silver gates of the primary manor district, where I assume the nobility kept houses, an impressive looking man on an impressive looking horse with an unimpressive look rode up to us and said to me that I was to see the High King in his court at once for a welcoming feast. The High King had to wait for a half hour, though, as I painstakingly explained that my cat-eared companion was in fact my equal, not my slave. Even after that I had to insist that I would not see the King without her in order for them to let her through. (Kikki objected to this, of course, as it wasn’t that big a deal. I of course, insisted otherwise).

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>>20668376

>>20668358

Tell a tale, it need not be of extraordinary articulation. This is your story, tell it however is your way.

I need more raw materials to build guns by the way, I've ALMOST perfected the revolving revolver I've been working on

>>20668366

A huge minotaur. Tallest living being on two legs that I've ever seen.

>>20668423
Bah, forgive my lack of signature. This one is being done on the fly, so I hope you'll forgive the speed it's being produced.

>>20668424

I'm not sure if that is a slight or a compliment to be honest.

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>>20668423

Please.
Do not stop.
This tale is extremely enjoyable.

>>20668438

Find the mining guild, Mek.

>>20668424

I must admit, this captioned picture's meaning eludes me...

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>>20668472

Its a compliment.

>>20668428

Is it acceptable to basically write me and how I'd act in this situation? I hear a lot of hate for the self insert in writing, but I'm not much of a writer.

>>20668502

Though I do not know your name, Sir Knight, know that our tales are of our own experiences. There is no hate for sharing a diary entry.

>>20668502

It is easiest to write what you believe you would do in this situation than to play a part. If you honor the ideals of TeeGee then may all that hate you hate all the Harem Knights!

rolled 2 = 2

>>20668358
Just let it all flow out man. Write it, give no fucks about what it is, then go through and proof it, then post it.

You're posting anonymously on 4chan - quality is encouraged, but entirely optional.

>>20668484
But the guildmaster hates me for some reason, that's why i try to avoid having to deal with them as much as possible

>>20668542

What could have possibly done to earn the hate of the guildmaster?

>>20668527
>>20668530
>>20668540

Your words fill me with confidence, Brothers. I shall write, and display it for all to judge.

>>20668557
i don't know, but it probably involves gunpowder

>>20668655

Did you blow up his house?

>>20668678

I believe it was his outhouse.

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>>20668423
>>20668471
Leaving aside my clear chivalry (I write in exasperated jest), we walk in right into the court. After a few melodramatic gasps, more than expected chuckles, and even more ~scandalous~ gossip behind expanded handfans, the prim and proper court of High King Chekovich IV yadda yadda, list of titles far too long for me ever to bother remembering, got up and did the most impressive display of kissing my ass since that one trainee, what was his name… James! James Brandy had tried getting on my good side and was crying by the end of the day. That might be why I have my reputation… well, regardless. It was some horseshit speech about how honored he was to have such an esteemed adventurer in his court and I quote “Such an… eh… exotic companion!” Oh my goodness, they could probably smell the feces in Castle Waifu. He then insisted we now go to the Cordial Hall to have the grand feast.

There was a man behind the throne, tall and gaunt, who was watching me and Kikki most intensely. He would not show it, as if I casually met his eyes, he would avert, as though they were passing by, but I could feel his gaze and spotted it most often at my peripheral. He whispered something to one of the servants on the way out. I had no idea what he said, but I got the inkling that the feast wasn’t exactly something I should be partaking of. No one has ever kissed my ass because they genuinely like me, because everyone who genuinely like me know better than to try.

>>20668691

How...

>>20668691
Well now its his blown uphouse!

>>20668376


The next few days were mundane. Helping out around the Castle, talking to the familiar faces and generally being polite to the few harems set up by various Knights. One day in particular, A few other of the Homeguard were asked to escort some of the “Liberated” (Non-Waifu) women outside the walls, and into the forest for foraging berries for deserts, as a large contingent of Knights were due to return from their adventuring in short time. Five guards and twelve women of varying race set out into the forest, the women talking amongst eachother, and the some of the guards doing the same. I didn’t talk much, but responded well and kindly to anything asked of me by our charges. When a suitable patch was found, I set out to begin patrolling around the area, just air on the side of caution, as there were reports of bandits and rouges inhabiting these woods of late. My plain smiths hammer at my side, and my rifle in hand, I casually, but cautiously walked the surrounding groves and ferns, it was not until I heard the crackling of branches and shouts did I realize something was wrong at the main party.


Cont.

>>20668744

I began to run, run as fast as my feet could take me and my heart allowed me. I saw figures locked in combat ahead, and skidded to a stop a ways away from the conflict. Seeing bandits or rogues of some kind attacking the guards, and women, I shouldered my weapon and took a deep breath, one eye closed and my cheek against the wooden grain of the stock. Finding an enemy that was about to strike down a comrade, a crack of thunder echoes through the glen as my rifle loosed a ball of lead, killing the bandit instantly as it penetrated his thin leather armor. I began to run towards the rest, as it would take too long to reload my weapon. Dropping it as I ran, I drew my hammer and raised it against my foes. Letting loose a cry fit for barbarians I drew upon a bandit, a male elf, and brought the weighty hammer down upon his shoulder, and again his neck. With the elven male dispatched, I could see a lamia woman strangling a bandit’s life from him in her tight coils, and a Felim viciously clawing at another. They began to flee after a short reposte, and with no serious sounds outside some cuts and bruises, we made our way back towards the castle. I stood at the gate, and a fellow guard nodded and put his hand on my shoulder as he walked past. I was fiddling with the cartridge of the fired bullet when I dropped it and heard above me;

“You protected us well.”

I quickly rose to see who had spoken, but the voice was lost in the myriad of people entering and exiting the main gate. I was not sad, nor disappointed at this. I was happy, for I knew, she lay out there, somewhere within my walls, the ones I guarded so dearly.

>>20668624

In the old world, I was nothing of importance really. Nothing wrong with that, most people aren't. Just a cog in an ineffable machine. Then I, and thousands others, were brought to this world. Funny thing is, despite the obvious fact that I was here, and painfully twisted my ankle on the first night, I kept reffering to my old home as "The Real World". I think I wasn't alone in that regard.

Then Sir Gavran said his infamous eleven words. What seemed a joke became a rallying cry. A bizarro version of Joseph Campbell's famous Call to Adventure. Somehow it was what we needed to hear. We had a goal. Something to live for, beyond the next sunrise. The old outpost we found ourselves at was slowly repaired, enough to live in. I chipped in where I could, but I was no metallurgist, no chemist, no farmer. Nothing of importance. Being of reasonable fitness, and able to survive on one meal a day, I figured I could be useful on guard duty. So I acquired a spear and set about a basic patrol route around the camp.

The bodies were the worst. You could just be walking through the trees, when you'd come across a familiar face, or what was left of it after the arrows had their way. Most were brought back for a proper funeral, or what we could offer at any rate. Some, however, were only recently dead, the blood still dripping out. It shames me to admit, but I ran from those at first. I figured the murderers could be nearby. It wasn't until later we learned our unseen foe engaged in hit-and-run tactics, never staying too far. Even to this day we find the occasional body, some little more than skeletons, flesh rotted or consumed by the wildlife.

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>>20668744
>>20668750

I don't know if that is any good, but I'm just coming up with it off the top of my head.

>>20668864

I'm enjoying it. Hell, I want to know who your mysterious benefactor is.

>>20668877

No doubt it was Sir Gavran Earstroker. He's the reason we exist at all. I wish I was as good as he was with a blade, but I must be content to hopeful wishing and having a similar name. Maybe luck will smile down on me with this name?

rolled 4 = 4

>>20668864
>>20668846
Your writing's good and you should feel good

Perhaps someone (bagsy Not It) should start a 1D4Chan article about the Kingdom of TeeGee.

>>20668704
I don't know, but I do know that most people tend to blame me for most gunpowder-related accidents, given my reputation.
On an unrelated note, are there any unused shields lying around? I had this great idea for shield mounted guns...

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>>20668702
The feast was most certainly grand. If they can do one thing in Midyahs it’s prepare a high quality feat. It made me wonder what kind of food those in the lower levels of the city get, but to be truthful, I was a bit worried about what might be served me. I politely declined a few dishes, spouting some nonsense about religious dietary restrictions, and instead focused on entrees that other guests partook of that were already on the table. Likewise, I only drank of the wine that the rest of the court drank of. However, I think that Kikki may not have gotten the hint when I turned some things down, so after not too long, I found her half-way asleep. Well, not unlike her, but not in this manner. It seemed a bit more uncomfortable than her usual itis. I suspect it was some sort of colorless, odorless water soluble drug they sprinkled in the food and wine, because Kikki’s rather good with that sort of thing. As though on cue, I myself feigned exhaustion and ask that we retire for the night, citing a long journey and a delicious meal. I managed convince the staff through some mighty fake yawning that Kikki stay in the same room as me.

I didn’t have to wait long that night…

>>20668956

Why would anyone want a shield mounted gun?

>>20668978

If it's a tower shield, you could use it as cover, point in the enemies' direction and fire. Even if it doesn't hit, it'll still prevent further advance.

>>20668978
why would anyone have to ask why anyone would want a shield mounted gun?

>>20668928

I lament on the fact that if I were to right a novel on this subject I would most likely fail, monetarily speaking. I think that I shall write on this at great length in the coming months, would any of you gents read a 150-300 page novel about the Kingdom of TeeGee if I wrote it and gave it out for free in .pdf form?

>>20668978
so you can shoot while you block? Might work well against enemy archers....

>>20669021

Abso-bloodly-lutely. In a heartbeat sir.

>>20669021
I would

>>20669021

Hell, I'd read it.

File: 1347256744450.jpg-(26 KB, 300x370, White Knight.jpg)

It's odd to actually be an adventurer. It's something I read about in the old realm, something I fantasized about, pretended to be in games. It's another thing all together to actually dungeon dive, to meet some fine nonhuman ladies, and to sing in a tavern with your brethren. Not my "real" brothers of course, they didn't come over here. Actually, my real life seems far away now. All those years trying not to drop out of school before getting a degree, and now my main job is hacking away at skeletons. Funny, isn't it? It was actually a little hard to let go of my entire life, hell, I haven't even picked a new name like most of the others have, yet, but this is a one in a billion chance to be who I want to be. Not some lazy guy worrying about his career, trying to impress his friends, and settling for a life alone, but a young, aspiring adventurer, with brothers in arms who would lay down their lives for you. Of course, with all the interaction between us and our newfound friends, I doubt any one of us would just lay down and die. Indeed, the women have such an appeal I didn't see in the old world, this must be some fairy tale land.

(cont.)

>>20669021
I would give you a small sum (Especially so given the length, subject matter, and quality), of perhaps five to ten gold pieces, provided that it is not a mandatory price.

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>>20669051
And believe me, we try hard to impress these ladies. When we first arrived, you could count on your fingers the ones who weren't overweight or emaciated. Now, most of us are shaped like men, some leaner or more thick than others, but manly all the same. It's not surprising we were able to get fit, considering our adventuring. Droves of us spliting into parties and cleared dungeons, first armed with simple spears and shields, then as our wealth grew, with armor and steel swords, hammers, and axes. Using the money, we've also almost completely refurbished "Castle Waifu", a large, old castle, big enough to house most of us, and we've started adding a small yet functional town around it; not only do we live there, we've acquired an increasingly large following of nonhuman women. Interestingly, it seems like most of us are always geared for adventuring, even while off duty. I guess it's because it makes us feel and look heroic. I certainly feel that way, I was able to acquire a nice surcoat and bought several different swords, courtesy of local artisans. I always was a "swordfag", as we would say in the old realm. Some of us joke, calling our weapons "plus two stabbermeisters" and the like, most others have given them more meaningful names, usually after their waifus. Hell, I just realized that I haven't even settled down with anyone yet. There is that nice Lamia girl who works at the trinket shop. Guess I'd better start trying my hand before someone else does, eh? In any case, I've rambled on enough for now. It's time for me to drop the quiet act for a bit, and act assuredly, with an adventurer's persona!

.....and then, maybe that will impress her? This ought to be fun.

>>20669021
i would read the shit out of it, change my major from physics to english, become an english teacher, and make my students read it

>>20669051
>>20669060

Good job Sir Knight.

>>20669066

Well, I hope to please then. In my old life I always wished to write fantasy novels, but now that I'm here and have heard and seen the things I have, I do believe tales of love and honor should be their main focus.

>>20669090

Well, now is your chance. We can make it reading material in our first school.

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>>20669060
You're pretty good.

Better than a lot of fanfiction I've read

Honest criticism? You're can write, which is more than one can say about a hell of a lot of people, however you are also rather generic - You don't have a "Style", a personal flair, a touch that makes it Yours. That's not something you can learn though - it's something that just comes into being.

Please, continue.

>>20669066

Oddly enough, as a History and English double major, this appeases me greatly.

So... what's the story behind your names? Why did you choose them?

>>20669125
>You're can write,
>which is more than one can say about a hell of a lot of people
present company included

>>20669156
Myself included! Sure, I can write proper Queen's English in a coherent manner, but a well thought out character, with realistic strengths and flaws? Anything involving romance or the opposite gender? Plots? Combat? Character development? FUCK NO. I can't even stay in character in an RPG!

I swear this oath to you, fellow Harem Knights and citizens alike.

I shall not allow this project to falter as so many of us have on TeeGee.
I shall see this through til the end, for better or worse.
I shall try my hardest and should I fail I shall do so with the knowledge that there was nothing more I could do.

I swear this on my honor, should I fail to deliver may the Gods strike me down that I might never rise again!

>>20669156
>>20669125

I wouldn't say I am particularly good at writing, I just enjoy doing it.

>>20669151

Personally, its my middle name. Much more interesting than my first name, and a HELL of a lot cooler sounding than Luigi, my other middle name.

>>20669125
Thanks, that's good to hear. To be honest, I've been aware that I'm a little generic; I need to work on that, but I love classic, vanilla things, even if they seem cliche. Then again, this was also more of a "what I would do/be" entry, so there is that.

I'll see if I can't post something better in the upcoming afternoon, but first I'm gonna hit the sack.

Night, /tg/.

>>20669191
>Not wanting to be Sir Luigi, Waifu Romancer Extraordinaire.

>>20669181
We'll hold you to that.

>>20669191

Giovanni is a boss name man. Literally Red

>>20669217
>Night, /tg/.
holy crap it's night!!!

>>20669151

It resembles my full name. My title was given to me when I started training war hounds, they are now a powerful ally to our forces. They also make excellent pets.

>>20669229
I always thought you got your title from the sheer number of canid waifus you have

>>20669258
That too.

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Every gods damned day.

I woke up with a familiar weight bearing down on me. The figure on top of me snored contentedly, blissfully unaware of my struggling, tail strewn across my face, just as it is every morning.

The veteran knights warned me about dragons, but I just wouldn't listen.

I managed to shift my weight around enough to loose an arm from my captor’s grasp so that I could do that trick the outrealmer taught me. Be it dragon, liazrdwoman, or lamia, all scaled women seem to have a specific point near the tip of their tale where, when squeezed, relaxes them and looses their grasp. How the outrealmer knew this despite his land lacking monsters Ill never know, but I think the gods that gifted their sages Annie Mayes and Mahn Gah with this knowledge. Iskosaya awoke with jolt and rolled off of me as I squeezed her tail, hard enough to get her attention but gentle enough so as to be enjoyable. My escape was short-lived however, as she soon recovered and clutched me from behind, pulling me into a hug with her titanic strength.

“Well aren't you the early riser, my lovely little treasure.” she mumbled groggily into my neck, still half asleep

“Very funny, Isko, but we need to help the others break camp if we are to reach the coast by sundown. So if you would please let me go...” I tried to squirm free of her grasp, but that only caused her to tighten her grip.

“Don't you know, love? A dragon never parts with her hoard, and you're my most precious gem of all.”

“And as much as I would love to stay here and bask in each others splendor, we really must get going! If you have this much trouble waking up in the mornings, you could have just stayed back in Teegee, you know.” I knew immediately that I had said something wrong when she let go of me and let me get dressed without another word of protest.

Oh man if I wasn't so drained I'd totally writefag

>>20669258

Well I do have 6 WolfWomanWaifusWhileWe're on the subject.

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>>20668973
For being an assassin, he was pretty noisy. If not for the drugged food (which I assure you, Kikki really chewed me out for not telling her about it right out), he wouldn’t have been able to get to the door without a “Who’s there?” A second followed him, shackles at his belt. Snapping the neck of the knife-man while he stabbed at Kikki’s empty bed was easy enough. Knocking out the guy with the shackles was a bit harder, that caused a third man outside the door to come running in, and uh… he tripped over his own feet out the open window. It was a few minutes of incompetence I can scarcely explain. I later learned that they were the inbred bastards of one of the nobles, trying to make a name for themselves. Well, when the second woke up, scared to pissing himself, he spilled everything, that they were going to kill Kikki and capture me, use me as leverage in negotiations. Well, from there I dumped the other body out the window, and told the lone moron to go upstairs and open the window directly above mine.

“You’re going to let me live!” he said, piss still fresh on his hosen.
“Yes, if you do that thing.”

Anyway, he left, did that thing, and in the morning, after Kikki had some violent indigestion (never pleasant with cat-folk. Ugh, that hacking is gross), and we got summoned before breakfast since the bodies were found staining the beautiful marble walkway. This is where the real fun started…

Hmmm, should I continue? I know it’s already a bit late since I just admitted they tried to kill me, but I’m still here, alive and well, and I don’t know if I should really bore you with all these tales of my alleged gallantry, which you guys certainly don’t need to hear from me.

>>20669151

Virgil was a character in Arcanum, and I couldn't think of anything else. Sir Bob wouldn't work.

File: 1347258002075.png-(8 KB, 570x533, 1297986972417.png)

You know, this is has been honestly one of the best threads I've participated in for quite some time. Thank you chaps, you've really given me a wonderful setting and mythos to work with and dream about in my University classes tomorrow.

>>20669151

I always wanted to give my son the name Garrett, but it seemed unlikely that I would meet a woman in the Old Realm, so I took it for myself when I was thrown here with others. As for my title? That is a story I would rather not tell.

>>20669277

You're safe in these walls. Continue.

>>20669277

More sir! It's getting interesting!

>>20669151
I already explained my title, as for my name, I liked my old one so I decided to keep it, though I am tempted to change it to Zamanek, which was my great-grandfather's last name

>>20668846

Time passed, almost in a blur. We lost many of our number during the First Winter. When before we had funerals, now we had mass graves. Some fell to more natural causes such as disease, starvation, and hypothermia. Others were the result of accidents; a broken leg could be a death sentence in those times, without any hospitals to correct infection or ruptured vessels. Then there were the killings in the forest. It seems that our hated assailants weren't as impeded by the snow as we were. Overall though less of our number died at their bowstrings, since we daren't venture too far from camp when a sudden snowfall could drop visibility to the range of your forearms.

Thankfully the Felim came through. Whether this was coincidence, or divine providence, I'll let others debate. Beforehand I refuted the existence of any deities, but when I saw those strange, wonderful catfolk for the first time, I was given food for theological thought. Others have wrote of all they did for us, so I shan't repeat that tale again. All I will say is that everything we have today would never have happened if they'd never came. We owe them everything, and we can never truly repay them. They'll tell you otherwise, of course. They'll mention how they had food in plenty, and their medicines were cheap to produce, and that we gave them the respect that many had refused to pay them. One even said to me that he felt guilty about using us for their ends for such paltry repayment! I'd have laughed, but he was in the middle of administering some herbal salves to my leg after a nasty incident with some indigenous version of poison oak. Laughing at the man who's currently trying to stop your leg inflating like a baloon seemed rather like a bad idea.

So are we going to archive this thread as well brothers?
also, for names go here
http://draconic.twilightrealm.com/
plug something cool sounding in and get a new name

>>20669412

Tell us about thyself, I plan on using the characters established here in my work. If you tell your tale here I won't have to make up your tale there.

Last one for the night chaps.


More time had passed, and within that short span of the bandit attack, the frosts began to settle instead of the morning dew, and ones breath could be seen as they walked atop the walls. The green cloth that had given me my lever action rifle turned into a scarf that I wore loosely around my neck, and a thick coat over my plate cuirass that protected my chest, and honestly, I had debated putting it on that morning, and frankly I am glad I did. For that day an arrow decided to loose itself from the tree line, and imbed itself in the domed surface. While it did not pierce my skin, the sudden shock knocked me off my feet and flung me from atop the wall to the ground below. I awoke to a gathering of women around me, tending to me as I came to. They had pulled the arrow from my breastplate, and I woozily saw a few of them, lamias, arguing over it. Finally, a dark hand waved the others away from my side, and pointed to a home near where I lay. I felt the strong hands of a minotauress picking me up and carrying me through the door, and setting me down on a bed. Blinking painfully, I reached for my hat, and could not feel its broad brim, nor the large feather that adorned it. Sitting myself up a hand fell upon my chest, stopping me from rising.

The dark house made it hard to see, in addition to my concussed state, but what I could see made my heart drop, and rise equally quickly. It was her, I knew it was. Her pale hair, her olive skin, it must have been the one who sent me the message, and thanked me at the gate. I felt a hand push me back to the soft bedding and a hand caress my face as my eyelids suddenly fell heavy, and I drifted back unconscious, happy as any man could be.

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>>20669264
The rest of the morning went by without further spectacle, which was in itself a spectacle. As our party of Harem Knights continued their march to the coast, the young dragon remained quiet, not even talking to the other waifus that had come along for the trip as she had been wont to do in days past. I had often been warned of a the wrath of a spurned dragon and still remember how fierce she was the day we met, so I had reason to fear for my life. When we took our midday break, the felims and elves had run off into the woods, their respective knights chasing after them, but Iskosaya remained at camp, quiet as ever with her face an emotionless mask. I steeled myself for whatever punishment she was cooking up and prepared to apologize.

“Look, Isko, I-”

“I really am a burden, aren't I?” she cut me off, her eyes moist and her face sullen. “All I ever do is get in the way with my selfishness...”

“No! Thats not what I meant when I-”
I tried to protest, but she would have none of it.

“It’s like you said, it would've been better for me to stay back at Teegee.“ The first tear rolled down her cheek. “I just get in the way and I can’t even wake up on time for-”

It was my turn to cut her off. Not with words, but a kiss.

“It’s just that, of all the things I’ve hoarded over the years, you're the only treasure I’ve ever found.” she continued through sniffles “I never want to let you go...”

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>>20669543

“And I never want you anywhere but by my side.” I said with a smile. “I was worried for your comfort and safety, Isko, not mine.”

She wiped her eyes and smiled at me before bristling up and glaring in indignation “My safety? MY safety?! I am a dragon, love, and yod do well to remember it! There is nothing out here you will face that is diercer than I! Iskosaya the Illustrious! You worrying wounds my pride!”

I smiled, my own mood raised by her lifted spirits, and turned to break camp when she pulled me into another kiss.

“But do not think that means I do not appreciate your worrying, my lovely little treasure.”

They warned me about dragons, and I thank gods every gods I just wouldn't listen.

“Well that's relief, because I also worry about your snoring. Truly, it is the fiercest thing I will face in this realm. The loudest, too.”

“Well I never!”

>>20669551

Pray tell, my good man, what is the your moniker? That you might be included in my work as well.

>>20669581
You mean me or that character? Because Ive done a few different one-offs now, including Evarion Windfellow from the last thread, and I prefer to stay anon.

>>20669512

Ohh don't tempt me Sir Knight, I am a sucker for Character templates.

>>20669595

The character that the tale is about.

>>20669412
This is a good source too
http://www.rinkworks.com/namegen/

>>20669599

I already have much of your tale and it shall be weaved in with the rest, more likely than not an undercurrent of the main storyline.

>>20669604
Lets call him Sir Joran. Sir Joran of the Harem Knights, lover of the dragon waifu Iskosaya.

>>20669613

So it shall be written.

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>>20669337
>>20669344
Very well, but you guys already know this story.

>>20669277
Well, anyway, I went into their beautiful, morning lit white marble court, color splashes from the stained glass, and High King Chekovik IV stood up before me and acted all insulted that despite his fantastic “hospitality” I had gone and killed off two members of his court and permanently scarred another. Oops? Well, I showed up, quite alive to the great discomfort of the higher elements of the court. I could almost feel that gaunt man’s chafing, since he clearly failed really hard. No matter, after accusing me of doing it, and me giving a logical reason why that would be poppycock, especially since they had no business to be in my quarters in the first place, the fool then blamed Kikki for their deaths!
“Well that would be all well and good, my Liege, if she wasn’t in my bed the entire night!” The shocked gasps were golden, but nothing so brilliant as the shade of red Kikki turned. Worth it.
The King yelled nonsense and demanded the guards seize her, I drew the assassin’s blade from by cloak (they had taken our arms when we arrived. It made sense). “If any lay a hand on her, they lose it”

(con't)

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>>20669618
(con't)

“You see, I could regale you a story about how you attempted to drug me and then three armed men, one carrying a dagger with your court’s crest on it, with intent to kill my companion and abduct me entered my room late last night, and bumbled in the worst way to their own demise, or…” and here I pause for dramatic effect “Or I could say how wonderfully soft and luxurious the sheets were and express my condolences if we sullied them at all” There was no describing the look on Kikki’s face at that moment.

I remember she hissed at me “If we get out of this, I’m going to kill you!”
And I whispered back “Worth it!”

“So… we can take a moment to honor the dead, and then get to work on this trade agreement over breakfast? Or would you rather just be made to look as the weak fool to your Jarls and court?”

I can tell you, he changed his tune mighty fast there. I sensed that glorious horseshit once again.

Well, I guess the cat’s out of the bag now, though I don’t think it matters much at this point. I’m pretty sure by now Chekovik got deposed not long after, and by his own, slightly more competent bastard no less.

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Hey /tg/, this is a sexy girl and not a portal to another land. Isn't it nice?

>>20669632

You two are just adorable.

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>>20669636
No matter how many times I click it, nothing happens...

>>20669636

She is indeed quite beautiful.

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>>20669636

Uncalled for.

>>20669655

Keep clicking.

>>20669665

I must sleep now my fellow Knights, but before you too slumber upvote this so I can use it for reference.

http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive.html

File: 1347261390477.gif-(23 KB, 600x263, Wizards are dicks.gif)

>>20669636

>>20669370

Eventually we were no longer a collection of misfits. We were a society. And as a society, we decided to take the fight to those who had preyed upon us during our formation. We refused to suffer the killings in the woods any longer. Too many had fallen, and justice would be served. I was but a foot soldier, adept with my spear, but not a leader. Turns out we were fighting Elves, the same ones who's ears had rallied us so long ago. The fighting was brutal, but forgive me if I don't go into much detail: the battle rage that I didn't know was inside me had been given release, fuelled by the memories of dragging back the bodies of my friends to camp. All I remember are images. A young Elf, who looked similar to myself in age but probably older than my father, impaled through the lung by my spear. Two more, side by side, falling as my blade slashed across their face in a sweeping movement. And blood everywhere. Eventually the killing stopped, when we ran out of targets. We were left with only the women, who viewed us as saviours from their own kind. I tell you, when my injuries had healed and my body stopped aching from it's first taste of war, I rubbed more than ears that night. Turns out, for the Elf ladies, the idea of men asking for consent first is a foreign concept. That fact alone made me feel better about the partial genocide we commited.

>>20669769

That was all quite some time ago. Now, our Kingdom prospers, with people from multiple species all united under one banner, that of Teegee. Many have their Waifus, myself included. Remember that Felim I mentioned, the one who healed my leg? Well, he introduced me to a business partner of his, a travelling merchant. So now I spend my days on the back of a wagon, listening to tales from these two Felim and an Elven lady that wanted to see the world outside her village. One slightly drunken evening led to a VERY drunked evening, and now I have a Waifu. Two of them in fact. Well, three if you count the other member of our caravan, but I was drunk that evening and the males and females look so damned alike...

>And thus ends this tale, and my first attempt at writefaggotry.

>>20669776
>>20669769

Damn, will these be archived as well, or did I do it too soon? I know not how archiving works, besides how to start it.

>>20669796

No idea man, I've never requested a thread be archived.

File: 1347261950741.gif-(113 KB, 310x233, 1344643658629.gif)

>>20669776

>>20669817
don't bother, it already is

>>20669796

I'll admit, I have no idea. But I would think so, at any rate. Hell, I've seen archives where it's been submitted like halfway through the story.

And there's always Foolz.us; I think they archive everything.

>>20669825

Thanks!

>>20669839

I saved them just in case and now I really am going to sleep. Exquisite slumber Brothers!

Well its about that time for me chaps, excellent thread if I do say so myself. But I have to get ready for classes at 9:30.

Harem Knights of Teegee. Maybe I'll make a quest thread for it about a new Knight. One day. Possibly.

Best thread I've participated in for a long time. Good show gents! This had better not die out, there's so much potential.

>>20669851

Sleep well Sir Knight. May you dream of Waifus and Glory.

>>20669852

Study hard, Sir Knight.

And now I feel a little ashamed that I didn't tell a story for our fellow knights. Oh well. There were plenty to entertain old veterans and raw recruits. Maybe another time.

A time after I sleep.

So, 5 space marines appear in Castle Waifu.

How do they react?

>>20669892

Hopefully we keep The Kingdom of Teegee going for a while yet.

>>20669920

Probably the way they respond to everything unusual; with bullets.

>>20669938

Perhaps if someone makes a quest thread, our Kingdom will live.

I might make one tomorrow if no one else has plans to. Possibly. And if I do, probably late. Around 10 PM.

>>20669961

Wait, my writing is shit. Never mind.

>>20669961
>>20669970
Don't worry, I underwent the exact same thought process earlier.

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>>20669618
>>20669632
Damnit Lem! What the hell did I tell you about telling that story!? NEVER AGAIN, y'hear me? That shit NEVER HAPPENED. Nine Divines, it's like he doesn't even think...

And besides, you always forget the part where you panic after killing the first guy. I TOLD you that move breaks human necks. It only knocks out Dwarves!

>>20670045
Oh boy, this gon' be good.
Unfortunately though, I simply must be getting to bed, as I am legally required to be well rested before working on anything

My story starts just like the rest of ours; some insane wizard (that seems redundant) zapped me away from my home to some fantasyland and left me stranded with tons of other fa/tg/uys, never to return home. Eventually the days got colder and supplies dwindled, and people started dieing. Some people tried to live off of what they had as long as they could, others ventured out and tried to find sustenance elsewhere. I was among those that headed out. I was fairly confident in my chances. I had a good survival knife, strong boots, and I coat that kept me warm despite being holier than rusted metal (I still don’t know why I laugh at this joke). I was in fair shape thanks to being so poor I had to walk everywhere and knew a bit about self-defense from kung fu flicks and my military sister, along with some basic survival skills thanks to browsing random Internet sites over the years.

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>>20670497
Unfortunately, a good deal of my knowledge on what wild foods are safe to eat was absolutely useless, assuming it was ever good in the first place. All the plants on this world didn’t look a thing like the ones back on the Old World. I did my best not to die of starvation and tried out a few different things (do NOT eat the orange kiwi things) for the first few days before thankfully finding a lamia girl. Actually she found me, I could barely see her, her hair and scales were both as white as snow, with skin not far behind, some kind of camouflage. She saw that I was in desperate need of help to stay alive (do NOT eat the orange kiwi things) and, after a quick chat to make sure I wouldn’t kill her, she decided to make me an offer. She teaches me what is safe to eat (do NOT eat the orange kiwi things), and I keep her warm during the winter. Considering that my only other option was to get killed by the orange kiwi things, I accepted. For the next week or so Kari, as she was called, showed me how to get fresh, safe (do NOT eat the orange kiwi things) food (even meat) and how to get away from the local elves, who I found out weren’t very friendly, and I lived with her in the little den she had built. After that she slept pretty much non-stop. My day was pretty much just wake up, get food and water, come back, get wrapped up in her tail (not as nice as it sounds when the tail is cold), and go to sleep.

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>>20670505
The first month was pretty uneventful if you don’t count the elves. I killed more than a couple. Still haven’t figured out why taking a life didn’t freak me out more, maybe I’m just bottling it up till I snap. I managed to turn Kari’s bow into a crossbow pretty easily so I could hunt better. However, eventually I had an encounter with a wolf girl. I found out later that she had been separated from her pack thanks to a few elvish archers, and found me while trying to meet back up with them. She thought I was an elf thanks to the crossbow and lack of any kind of tail, so she attacked me, and I smashed my crossbow into her face. Knocked her out and broke both her nose and my makeshift stock. I was worried that other people would come thanks to her howling, so I got my ass back to the den and stayed up as long as I could with an arrow pointed at the entrance, but eventually I fell asleep and when I woke up there was a wolf girl waiting for me. Apparently everything I did to hide my trail from the elves wasn’t worth jack shit when I was being tracked by scent, how she did that with a broken nose I will never know, but I digress. She explained that since I had taken her down in a one on one fight I was now her “alpha”. I decided to trust her partly because I know that if she wanted me dead she could have offed me in my sleep, and partly because her tail looked (and was) really fucking warm. I decided to call her Ana, after a dog I had in the Old World, since her real name was mostly barks and growls that I couldn’t make sense of, and from there on out she helped me stay alive. She was great at hunting and could take my place in Kari’s coils when I got too cold.

>>20670517
Eventually, temperatures started rising and Kari woke up. I introduced her to Ana and after some initial shock they ended up getting along. When the snow started melting and moving around became easier, I decided to head back to where I first arrived in this world. Ana said that it was her job to go where her master went, and Kari said that she wasn’t going to lose her source of body heat, so I brought them along with me. When I got there I found that not only had some of the fa/tg/uys survived, they were practically thriving thanks to the help of a tribe of catgirls. Hell there was even talk about founding an order of knights. I helped out where I could, thanks to high school shop and college physics I was able to build simple structures and siege weapons to help defend the quickly growing base, and my newfound skills helped to gather food and materials. Kari managed to find her own place pretty quickly since she apparently knew quite a lot about making medicine, and Ana was a massive help on the hunts. Days past, I got a ring for Kari, a collar for Ana, and was officially sworn in among the others in the first line of Harem Knights. I was given a suit of armor and a helm with a lamia on top, and I painted the whole thing white.

Oh boy...I'm speechless at what that thread has become.

>>20670576
good speechless or bad speechless

>>20670497
>>20670505
>>20670517
>>20670519
Oh my, I can see some people not being very happy about that. Leave during the Hard Months and come back looking well fed with two waifus? Definitely gotta be some hard feelings around there somewhere.

>Forget to post 2 paragraphs when I needed to cut the text, herp.

I am neither knight nor artisan, I came along with everyone else, but never made myself known and prioritized my own survival while those around me dreamed big, but I couldn’t allow myself to do so.

I can at least take pride in the fact that I never, nor will I ever, worked against my fellow even while prioritizing my life: the motto that one cannot protect thy existence alone is much better than outright selfishness.

I stayed with the man of Teegee out of necessity, greeted and talk with the many arrivals and inhabitants while keeping a comfortable distance, but took up archery when elves settled with us after a few bloody battle, I can at least take pride in my aim: my built is less than stellar for a rank and file, but I can fire a few arrows, even if my arm tire out fast.
I was here from the start, suffered through the hardship and enjoyed the spoils in my own way, even with the many good hearted and sociable men of Teegee as bros, even with the increasingly exotic women taking interest in the apparatus on my face or simply wanting to talk; I kept a comfortable and polite distance.

I am called the lone wolf Alexander for I never took on another name, but I would be dead without the community, so why, exactly, am I telling you all of this?

A problem concerning a woman, of course!

At the height of our community with castle Waifu bustling with cats, elves, monster girls and increasingly able Teegee men, our abode was visited by an angel.

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I didn’t care much for the hierarchy, but she is without a doubt an absolutely magnificent woman, 2 pairs of rosy wings accompanied by long pale hairs, armed of course, discussing with the higher members of our fine order but for some unexplainable reasons her eyes crossed mine and I felt my heart skip a beat, I knew that feeling all too well for I had a crush on a childhood friend during the eve of adolescence and a few time during my stay in this world so far, thus, I worked on killing the feeling as soon as possible for that is simply who I am, a scared, worthless man.

Without crisis at hands, I opted to gem cutting: the incredibly careful work soothed both my nerves and my perfectionism, so concentrated was I that I could never hear any intruder.

‘’The warmth of the denizens of castle Waifu is overbearing, which make the sorrows of the few… enigmatic’’

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I take pride in my coolness, I was always a slow and introvert man: the hardships of this land all but increased these traits, so I simply carefully set down my tools and stood to greet the absolutely wondrous creature in my insultingly small room full of books.

‘’I have my pains, as all creature do, but a lady like you would find much more luck in healing someone else, for they have a more urgent problem than me’’

But she would have none of that.

‘’My name is Radiance, past hierarch of her ladyship [INSERTGODDESHERE] and I’m planning to make myself at home here, I will be in your care!’’

I don’t understand, even now after 2 weeks, I don’t understand, she listens to all my talk of our home without doubting me, she would smile when I grew silent, some of the festivity would be spent how I like: in a quiet spot of the crowd, enjoying a fine drink with the best of company.

Here ends the brief memoir of Lone Wolf Alexander, gem cutter and would be optometrist.

Will probably be continued.


[Hoho he also loves to tell story by the fire! His house is full of books too, I found one with notes!]

>>20670599
Good speechless. for now.

What would happen to loli-lovers like me ? Would they find a suitable race and live with them in peace or would they be hated and shunned for their preferences even by other Knights of Teegee?

Wow, I can't say I expected this much to be up. I'll have to add some more writefagotry when I get off work in a few hours.

Sit down young esquire, and let me tell you the tale of my arrival here in the days before the Lands of TeeGee spread far and wide. Although before I start, I must say that I find it funny you've chosen to pester old me for a tale and not one of the more famous Knights.

Well, my tale started one night as I returned home from working my job back in the Old Realm. Too tired to even bother kicking off my boots, I sat down at my computer and began to browse the hallowed board of /tg/. Quite stressed from the day's work, I picked my my sword and began to oil it, something that has always calmed me down. It was, and still is, my prized possession, something I was not allowed to own by the harsh laws of my old homeland. Well, as I was oiling and polishing the sword, I came across a link to an image, a picture. Clicking it, I activated a portal and was brought forth into this land with only my things I had on me. Only the clothes on my back, the things in my pockets and my prized katana and cleaning kit.

I arrived to find a massive amount of my fellows trying to keep a small community going, with not enough food and shelter to go around. Despite having no training with my weapon, I was one of the few to have an actual honest to the Gods sword with me, and the tales I was told were grim. Foragers and hunters went out, never to return or be found riddled with arrows from unseen hunters.

>>20670890
From what I know, /tg/ doesn't like much lolicons.
personally, I'd like to burn them all and throw the ashes inside /jp/.

>>20670901
I quickly offered myself to the small Guard that was forming, and found myself on patrol nearly straight away. I took over from a bloke who clutched a wooden spear kind of frightfully. He looked haggard and worn, but still held his head up high, a man doing what had to be done in a time of great peril. My first patrol shift was uneventful, as was my second and my third. I soon found out there was little to no co-ordination, and I helped a bloke who called himself Giovanni organize the armed men into a Homeguard. I wasn't much help mind you, but a small smile and a few pointers and just a general pisstake and talking shit helped keep the Homeguard running. Some took to calling themselves Guardsmen, but thankfully it never took off.

After several weeks we began to rotate the more confident men out with the foraging parties as the attacks became more frequent. Just about every Knight has his story where he goes out and heroically saves the day in those early dark times. I was blessed to not have to fight. Then, as Winter fell we were rescued by the Felim. Of course, you know all about that part of our history young esquire. I fought in the First Battles, killed my first Elves there. I took no Waifu, for I was not interested in an Elven Waifu, but I did claim a small plot of land just inside the city walls and was given said plot of land to build a house on. It still stands there, a small 4 bedroom house made of wood amongst the giant manors of the other Knights.

>>20670890
I dare say you could find a nice, dwarvern waifu. Unless what you like is the child-like attitude, in which case, get thee hence from the castle, thou cursed pedo.

>>20670965
Alas, guarding an empty city was not for me, I like so many other yearned for adventure. I was one of the first to join the Harem Knights, though I took no new name nor Title, as I had yet to prove myself in my own eyes, yet again those of my peers and bros. True I had killed and been wounded in battle, but I still had no Waifu. So I set out on one of the first outbound trading caravans, heading for a small fishing village to the west. Two Felim girls and an Elf sheila were my company, and I their guard. We traveled for about 2 weeks, sharing stories and jokes as we went. To my surprise, we reached the fishing village without being attacked, at all! Well, that was soon to change, not that I knew it then.

I bid Jacen, Elissa and Talissera goodbye as they set up their caravan in the Merchant's section and wandered down to the docks. The girls were all sad to see me go, and I them but the call still rang true for me. I had barely even scratched the surface of adventuring.

Well, down to the docks I went, and as I was casually walking around, getting funny looks from the locals due to my odd dress, I heard shouting. I ran to towards the sounds and came across an interesting sight. A small fishing ship, only a single masted ship, had docked and was offloading what appeared to be crates of something furry. Wolves? Dogs? Odd things for a fishing ship to have, and even odder was the fight going on between two men on the gangplank. With no room to move these two men were going hell for leather, beating the living crap out of each other.

>>20671028
With a mighty uppercut, the smaller of the two men knocked the other clean out, and he tumbled below into the water. A cheer went up from the crowd, and work seemed to resume. I walked over and asked one of the dockhands what just happened. He explained to me that the ship was a small slaver ship. They looked like fishing ships and sailed out to meet much larger pirate cruisers to offload their cargo and get payment. He said it as if it were normal, and it was in those times. he pointed out that the captured were mostly Felim, but he gasped at the last cage to be hauled up.

It was made of iron, much more sturdy and slightly larger than the wooden crates the Felim were kept in, and it had a beaten and bruised woman in it, chained up so she couldn't move her hands or feet. As the cage tilted in the wind, I gasped as I saw her fully. She was not a human, but a Kitsune! Her tails were in terrible condition, they looked like they were once red but were covered in so much dirt and grime. She wept softly as she resigned herself to her fate, sold a slave to some far away man of power.

She didn't know that her Knight was near.

>>20671095
Slavery, huh?

Alright, who here thinks the Knights Harem needs a navy? Given we have a few dragon waifus as well... Who wants to be the one to ask if they'd like to form an airforce?

Also: MOAR!

>>20671095
Even as the first cage was lifted aboard that ship and I was told what it was I had already set myself to the task of freeing those poor captured people, but trapping a Kitsune as well meant these bastards were going to pay. You see, back in the Old Realm my favourite 'mostergirl' as they are known back there was, and still is, the Kitsune. It was no longer the right thing to do. Now, it was personal.

I thanked the dockhand and walked back up to the markets. I waved to the girls as they did business, they seemed to be doing well. Walking past them, I entered the local tavern, a small and inviting pub. The bartender came across and offered me some ale with a frown on his face. I declined, making up some excuse that I had to stay sober as the guard of the girl's caravan. He smiled a little and commented on my weird outfit. I mentioned that we were from TeeGee, a fair and awesome land, not to far from here. The bartender laughed at that, telling me that if I was so awesome I would go and do something good before I left. I looked him in the eye and told him he would see, come the dawn.

>>20671142
Let me tell this story first, and then perhaps I will tell you of my days as the Fleet Admiral, before I got too old.....

>>20671145
I wandered the town until nightfall, discovering that the Slaver ship was still waiting on one last raider party to return before they sailed. Word was they would arrive tonight and then set sail in the morning. I watched them arrive at sunset, loading another half a dozen Felim onto their ship before heading into town to get drunk. After a few hours, the three of them emerged from the pub, roaring drunk and staggering. One of the men fell down, taking his two friends with him and I saw my opportunity.

Emerging from the shadows just like a good Anon does, I offered a helping hand. The men took it, and I hauled all three of them to their feet and steadied the most drunk of them, who announced himself as the Ship's Captain and head raider. I got his arm around my shoulders and helped him along, somehow getting him up into the ship. He waved off any suspicions, and I was aboard! After getting him into his hammock with the rest of his drunken crew, I slipped back above decks.

A single lookout was lazing about by the wheel, and I walked up to him with my flask out. Drink? I offered. He took it, and as he tilted his head skywards I slashed his throat. Catching the dying slaver with my other hand, I lowered him to the deck and took my flask back, keeping my katana ready.

Hey dudes, I wrote this bit of writefaggotry after seeing the first thread on sup/tg/. I haven't read through this one yet, so if it doesn't match what's been said here, that's why.

(If anyone decides this is worthy of screencapping, please leave out this post.)

>>20671227
The Kingdom of Teegee was a place where your destiny was your own choosing. In Teegee, your species matters not. Human, elf, dwarf, orc, lamia, anybody was welcome. And if you sought romance, it was your duty to venture out and find it for yourself. Becky was a child of this place, born of a human and a lamia. She admired her parents, and wished to follow in their footsteps. And when she came of age, she left to find the one for her.

>>20671232
She left for the mountains of Halann, to find her beloved. When she came back, she told stories of her adventures, to her parents, to Alec, her best friend, to all she had known in the Kingdom. But she had not found her beloved.

So she left for the plains of Narame, sure that she would find her beloved. And when she returned, she told the tales of her exploits to her parents, Alec, anyone who would listen. But she had not found her beloved.

Not to be deterred, she left for the faraway deserts of Solaria, determined to find her beloved. When she came home, she described what had happened to her parents, her friends, and most importantly, Alec. And she had realized that her beloved was right there, even before she left.

>>20671237
That's it. Now to read the thread and see what you crazy bastards have wrought.

If only I was good at writing...
pump life into this setting for me, brothers.

>>20671210
Every other Slaver on the ship was sleeping soundly, and I had free reign of the ship. The Slaves were kept the deck below the crew, presumably to make it harder for them to escape. I crept down the stairs to the slave deck, for their was no other name for it, and saw more than 30 Felim in their tiny cages. Each cage was constructed so a lock wasn't needed, simply a bolt that couldn't be reached from the inside. As I freed the first Felim, I shushed him and gestured to the other cages. Working quickly, all the Felim were silently freed and I sent them up the stairs and off the ship. They quickly left, eager to return to their families and freedom. Some of the girls
did stop and give me a quick kiss, but I waved them off to keep going. I had one last prisoner to free.

As I turned to the Kitsune's cage though, I encountered a real problem. Her cage and chains had locks, and I no keys. I walked over to her and whispered that I would return soon to free her before heading upstairs to the crew deck. Creeping over to the captain, I found he didn't hold any keys. Silently cursing, I spotted a small armoury to the rear of the ship. Sneaking my way over, I managed to find a small set of bolt cutters and a cask of rum, why it was there I shall never know. I took the bolt cutters and opened the cask of rum, pouring it on the wood as I walked down the rows of sleeping slavers.

I love this place just as i hate it. the clank of hammer on hot steel rings in my ears non stop, though one of the more magically and intellectually sound blokes got me a magical oxy-torch, so at least i dont feel like i have tennis elbow all day every day anymore.

The women, holy fuck the women. cat women, elf women, human women....and im still too much of a fucking coward to speak to them, still, leaves more time for working, and my metalworking skills are far better than what they used to be, i miss the old realm.
nine hour days five days a week, nothing like the days i'm working now. but, if these forges don't burn hot and heavy for damn near day and night the castle isnt safe.

Back home i always used to joke that i was a dwarf. with the filthy bushy beard that keeps getting singed and my height of around 5'5, and the fact i nearly eat, sleep and work in the forges, i suppose i've taken on that aspect even more.

sleep however is difficult and hard to come by, but one of the Elven mages helps me out from time to time, just puts a soft hand either side of my head, and pain, anger, all negativity just bleeds away in a wash of perfect calm sleep, but her services are often required by the knights, and considering they risk their arses to keep mine safe in this forge, i figured they deserve the healing touch more than i.


but today is special my freinds, today i craft my finest work!

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>>20671142
We don't already have an airforce? Rydia and I are more than willing.

>>20671334

My greatest project, see, i've been consulting with some Magi, about making suits of armor that are light enough to leave one unencumbered, but strong enough to ward off blows, as a sort of in joke, i mad a helmet of the materiel, shaped much like that of the space marines i remember playing in the old world, like an angry skull, with burning eye sockets of red glass.

overly dramatic i know, but the Knights of Teegee have become legends in their own right, i know guys whose tales are longer than an old 40k rulebook! and just as full of heroism against terrible odds, i know of men and women who have simply raised children, creating a new, mixed generation.

This is an age of wonder freinds, this is an age worth protecting, from what, i dont know, but either I'm paranoid or something wicked this way comes.

>>20671376
What keeps me rooted to these furnaces, keeps me hammering this enchanted steel? i need only look to those men and women who've found love, one look at such happiness, and my body screams for the fire, flames and fury of the forge, but my mind wanders, i want to make machines. linnishers, welders, belt sanders, grinders, all the tools we had in the old realm, all the machinery and industry that helped make manufacturing things so simple, so efficient, i want that to be my legacy.

but first i must finish the suits. first i must finish this last great smithing work, before i try my hand at engineering, My Healer freind, Alesia, she tells me it is better to make tools of industry, and weapons of war, she has such a subtle, gentle way about her, its just a damn shame i cannot spare any time to spend with her outside of the healing sleep and the talks that precede them.

when the suits are done,then i can live again.

>>20671322
Finishing my task, I grabbed the lantern that hung above the stairwell. Knowing that once I lit up the rum I would have a very short amount of time to work with, I took a few deep breaths. Calm and collected, I took the candle out of the lantern and lit the rum aflame.

I didn't stop to watch the fire spread, instead bolting downstairs to the iron cage. No longer caring about noise I set about breaking the lock on the Kitsune's cage. Two goes, and the lock fell to the floor as I wrenched the door open. I leaned in and cut the chains from her hands and feet as I said to her, "I told you I would return, but I this place is goona be too hot for me soon. Take my hand?"

She tried to stand but she just couldn't, poor thing was so bruised and hurt. So I scooped her up and carried her up the stairs as quick as I could. Taking the stairs two at a time I stopped and took a glance at the fire in the crew deck. It had spread across nearly the whole floor and yet the slavers all still slept. At that point I heard her voice for the first time, like honey dripping over fresh waffles, all sugary and sultry and sweet. She said just one word.

"Kasai."

The she punched my chest and I ran. I didn't look back, I ran up those stairs and into the cool sea breeze, not stopping as I hit the gangplank and ran down to the stone dock. I ran until I found a small seat overlooking the docks.

That was when I heard the first screams.

>>20666835
Mass murder. Of children.
Even if it is just your imaginary wankery...you are one fucking disgusting piece of trash.
Sage.

>>20671438
As I turned to watch that horrible ship truly catch ablaze, so did my rescued charge in my arms. We watched that ship burn to ashes, even as all the freed prisoners brought the townsfolk down. As the ship burned away to nothing and the fire died down, the Kitsune in my arms reached up and pulled my face down to meet hers.

"Arigato." she said, before kissing me deeply. As we broke the kiss she smiled up at me, those blue eyes of hers sparkling.

"Thank you, my Shining Knight. What is your name?"
"I have no name, for I have not done anything worthy yet, Madam."
"Then I shall call you Sir Kasai. Kasai means Fire in my language. And rescuing so many people is something worthy and just, especially on your own."
"Thank you, but it was nothing. I was just doing what had to be done, Miss?"
"Tomoe. Tomoe Mio is my name."

And that, young esquire, is the story of my first adventure, and how I got my name. Ah, would you look at the time! I must go, it is far past when I agreed with Tomoe I would stay out!

>>20671488
The man is the brutest beast of them all, my friend.

Were there any catboys?

>>20671757
Yeah, and now they're all heading to your home
with a supply of catnip and lube

>>20670890
I'm sure halflings and dwarves exist. Harpies can be pretty loli, too.

>>20671816
They're kind enough to bring their own lube?

Lovely~

This story must begin with our first winter. I remember it well, sitting around the campfires, protecting the weak fire from the cold with our trembling bodies. Apparently it was only a month, but to me that month felt like a year. Yes. I remember the chaos and the fear and the tears of those first nights. Some of us tried to keep everybody distracted with improvised role-playing games, jokes or just normal conversation. Not the easiest of tasks when entire groups would sometimes just disappear, swallowed up by the forest when looking for those bitter red berries that we knew were edible or just dying because of a mixture of hunger, cold and strife. It was around those days when some of the youngest begun to name themselves after their favourite characters, historical figures or just making up brand new names for a brand new world. I'll admit I first thought they were going insane (unfortunately wouldn't have been our first case; poor That Guy) and I kept using their real names when addressing to them, but soon I realized that those names were important, it gave them something to aspire to, they were a way for them to cope with the fact that we weren't in Kansas anymore. I named myself after a human NPC of a Rolemaster game I ran in what it seems to me now ages ago. Back then I thought I was doing this for them, to make them feel more comfortable in what they seemed to be our last days, but now I understand becoming Rhenel helped me survive the forest.

>>20671913
The arrival of the Felim was a miracle. I first thought I was delirious, that those red berries weren't as harmless as we thought they were, but no, they were there, almost at the last minute, like fucking Gandalf in the Battle of Helm's Deep. I can only imagine what they thought about us when they found us, sick, hungry, lying next to each other to keep us warm. Probably they felt pity. I know what we thought about them, though. Back in that first month there were big reunions where we discussed our situation and proposed ideas as to what to do. It was mostly something to keep groups in touch with other groups, stopping people from only interacting with others of their same nationality or region. Eventually most survivors (because that's what we were after the first two weeks) lost their interest, leaving it to those of us who still believed our only hope was to stay together and organize ourselves. We jokingly started to call ourselves the Council of DMs, because that's what most of us were back in Earth (Earth, it almost sounds like a magical kingdom now, doesn't it? Internet, planes, trains… perhaps it was. Perhaps it was). When the Felim showed up, the Council of DMs got together. I was there. I remember the wonder in our faces, the child-like smiles and the excited talk. But also the fear. Who were they? Should we trust them? Then one of them walked towards one of the groups and, opening her satchel, took what looked like bread and gave it to them. Soon other Felim were also there sharing their food with us. I didn't know that I was crying until one of the other DMs pointed it out to me.

>>20671919
Castle Waifu. Now that's a funny story. The Felim not only saved us, but also insisted on taking us to the nearest human supplement, an outpost in what I can only guess was the southeast. Turns out our new friends don't usually travel through these lands and their maps are dreadfully outdated. What was supposed to be a busy outpost with a guard and a surgeon was only a ruin populated by wild animals and silence. It was still better than sleeping outside, in the cold. Some of us quickly went to explore it. Now, what happened next? It took me by surprise. It really did. I was coming back to the courtyard from exploring what looked like a small chapel when one of the quietest guys, a Kiwi, was holding the hand of a Felim and saying that they wanted to stay together. I quickly looked for the other DMs, who were as confused as I was. We knew of the nomadic lifestyle of our friends, they've told us how the Humans here treated them, bringing us to this outpost was a risk for them and we the last thing we would ever want was to importunate them somehow. Before some of the most popular DMs could say anything others also spoke. They wanted the Felim to stay with us here. Together. Oh, man, the look of their faces. The Felim were shocked. And just as I wept in the forest when they saved us, I saw the tails of some of them raise and wiggle while hiding their face from us. More than half the Felim chose to join us, the rest left knowing that here they would always be welcomed as brothers and sisters. I guess that's how the word about us spread.

>>20671929
The Felim that stayed soon warmed up to our sense of humor. I spent our first night in what would eventually become Castle Waifu sitting next to a campfire, me and Fearghaile explaining Earth history to a pair of our native cat-like friends when out of nowhere this guy shows up, looks at the male Felim and proceeds to ask him how his relationship was with his family and if he happened to have some fae blood. We started laughing like crazy. For some stupid reason it was good to know that /tg/ never changed, even after all that happened. We soon started to plan our survival here. We asked the Felim about the native grains and fruits. It would take us years to finally have a decent agricultural system, but more humble legumes were harvested that very season. Since I was one of the few survivors with farming experience, I soon found myself teaching others to grow vegetables, legumes and helping to plow the fields (using wood, sweat and blood) next to the castle. We mostly sustained ourselves through hunting, even though the Felim hunters had no rival, I'm proud to say some of our guys weren't as useless as the rest of us when it comes to hunt down an animal. As time passed, we had to get further into the forest to find game. That's when the elves attacked.

>>20671939
They killed dozens of us, Felim and Human. Good people. We all got together in the courtyard, which somehow over the days had turned into a place for public debate and entertainment. We knew we had to do something, but we had no idea of what was the strength of our enemy, their number or what powers had at their disposal. We had no martial prowess and just running into the forest blindly was tantamount to suicide. We tried to negotiate with them, we sent bold diplomats to the forest only for them to be chased back by arrows, our offerings of food left untouched or worst, crossed by arrows. Our harvests were yet unable to sustain our population, if we wanted to survive we had to hunt, we knew that, but war? No. No, that was a price too high. Then one marvelous lunatic stood up, looked defiantly to the rest of us and proclaimed: "All I want is to rub some elf ears". At first there was silence. Then we cheered. We cheered like never before. Our new friends looked at us like we were insane, but perhaps one of those couples of Human and Felim looked each other in the eyes and understood. There was nothing else to say. We went to war.

>>20671951
I gripped one of the rusty weapons we found exploring the basements of the outpost, an axe. I've never used one of these and yet, there I was, my heart beating so hard I was worried I could be having a heart attack, my mouth dry, eyes wide open with fear. With me there were six other guys, two of them Felim. Around us, the tall trees, my imagination running wild, I was expecting an arrow coming from any shadow in any moment. I've never been more scared in my life. The faces of my group told me they were probably thinking the same thing. Then the arrows started flying, hitting nearby trees and taking the life of one of us. I'd like to say that we fought back, but we didn't. I was too afraid to move, the rest of the group fled. I remained still, back against a tree, my eyes fixed on the corpse. I looked to the left. The elf was there. I can only guess that that bastard wanted to take a closer look at his latest kill and assumed that we all had run like we always did. Well. I wanted to run. But I couldn't. So I forgot the rusty axe and jumped on him, screaming like a madman, the surprise in his eyes reflecting the fear in mine. I grappled him and, to his horror, I bit his nose off. He took out his dagger and stabbed me in the arm. I grabbed his hand and turned the blade against him. The combat was over, elf blood running down my chin, too excited to realize I was hurt. Then an arrow flew by.

>>20671961
Big mistake. I didn't think, my body just reacted. I charged towards the other elf, still screaming, an arrow hitting me in the shoulder, I didn't mind. I sunk the dagger in his belly, wrestling him with my left arm. A figure appeared out of nowhere, I almost jumped on him too. My group was back, they heard the screams. One of the Felim patched me up quickly and was kind enough to pretend he didn't notice the urine stains in my trousers. There was no epic speech then. I picked the axe and kept going forward, my legs shaking, but I wasn't alone then. We took their bows and used them against the elves, their daggers and swords way better than the ones we had from the outpost. My group lost three other warriors, one of them a Felim, but we marched on. I took the life of two other elves before reaching their city. And what a sight that was. Other units had done much better what we did and they were already storming the elven sanctuary. Our enemies chose to fight to the death, expecting their women to kill themselves after they fell to our blades. They almost did. The goddamn Earrubber stepped in and stopped them from doing it. Months later I asked him what the hell happened there, but his only answer is to look lovingly to his elf maiden, her head lying on his lap, and caress one of her ears with his hand.

>>20671983
The surviving elves at first thought the Felim were our slaves, but we quickly corrected them and explained who we were and how the catfolk had saved us. They looked to each other completely surprised, they were a proud people, willing to kill themselves before becoming a slave for another race. We told them we had no need for slaves, we only wanted to share the forest with them. Then a trembling voice was raised: "Y-you are always welcomed t-to our castle, my lady". Another guy, his face red, barely able to look at the Elven female representative. But that didn't happen right away, we had to recover from the war, bury our dead, discussing what went well and what almost made us lose the war. It was in that first war when some of us got their titles, I first I thought it was a joke, having people referring to me as a Sir after they heard about those two elves I killed in the forest. Turns out it wasn't and still I haven't get used to it. We went back to exchanging food with them. And those food exchanges soon evolved into friendly reunions were Elves and Humans would talk with each other for hours. It was no surprise when some people started to bring their Elf girlfriends to the outpost. That's probably when people begun to call it Castle Waifu. Of course, the name stuck.

>>20671993
Like I said, the word about us soon spread across the non-Human races of these lands thanks to the Felim and the Elves. A place of tolerance where everyone was welcomed as long as they brought no harm to others. And soon enough, other species started to show up at our gates. Others would instead hide in the nearby forest, trying to figure out if what they heard about us was right. Castle Waifu flourished, protected by the Guard and the Harem Knights (I promise it started as a joke!), strange creatures offering their wares in the courtyard market and looking for a place to live. We spent a lot of time making the dungeons and other castle rooms habitable for the new influx of inhabitants and their varied characteristics. We ended up having to expand the castle but it was definitely worth it. Our harvests no longer suffered from plagues or any other problems thanks to the help from Elves and Driads (and some even weirder races who somehow had taken a liking to some of us strange humans). Things were going too great. I was happy for everybody, love was flourishing everywhere around me… but I never had any interest in a Waifu. That's my secret: that image that brought us here? It was blank for me.

And yet, somehow, she found me.

>>20672012
What was I doing in that cave? Interesting question. We had just started experimenting with taming wild animals and, since the farm didn't require my attention for at least another month I volunteered to take care of a herd of goat-like creatures. It wasn't what you would call a stressful job, just making sure they didn't get lost into the forest. I tried to get a hound from Dythier but he was too busy arguing with a wolf-woman to pay attention to me. Still, I was doing ok. Until that bloody storm, of course. I took the goats inside the stable when I realized there was one missing. There was still light so I went looking for it into the forest only to end up finding a cave. It was pouring, so it made for the goat to be inside, away from the rain. And I was right. I found the goat, trapped in what was definitely the biggest spider net I've seen in my whole life. I just turned away and left the cave. Yes. That's what I did. Giant spiders are real here, I've seen some of them when cleaning the castle dungeons. What made me go back to the cave then? Fuck if I know.

>>20672029
I got in, my eyes exploring the cave for whatever monster could have built such a huge net. The goat was trembling, every spasm making the rest of the net tingle. I got near the poor creature, pulled out my Elven dagger and tried to set it free. The something blocked the light from the cave entrance. I turned and I found her eyes looking at me with hunger. Stupid me backed away from her, getting as trapped into the net as the poor goat. She laughed at me, the sound echoing in the cave with cruelty. I noticed her fangs, dripping with venom, just an inch away from my neck. Then I did what I had to do. I bartered my life. If she let me free, I would bring her more goats for her to eat. I was desperate, she had no reason for not eating me there, and somehow she accepted. I left confused, the goat-like creature behind as the first payment. Perhaps I wasn't a man of honor in Earth, but Sir Rhenel, survivor of the Elven War, DM and farmer definitely was, so I kept my word and I brought live animals to her on the following weeks. We almost never talked, she creeped me out. I suppose she had to notice. One night I left the cave and she started to follow me. I panicked and ran. She found me in the forest. She wanted to see Castle Waifu. That's all she said, her fangs again right next to me, her skin making mine crawl. What could have I done?

>>20672037
She found herself a place to live in the deepest chamber of the dungeons. I guess she must have scared away whatever used to live there before. Some nights, after working in the farm, I just like to relax in the courtyard playing some of my favourite songs using a Felim instrument that the surviving catfolk of my unit gave me when we got back. I'm afraid my music isn't exactly popular in Castle Waifu, I guess I'm still a hipster after all! Anyway, one night she was waiting for me after I finished playing. She informed me in her hissy menacing voice that I know lived in her den, deep down in the dungeons. She had scared a few Minotaurs into moving my things to her chamber. Then she dragged me down. Some nights I wake up in the bed of spider-silk she crafted for us and I find her looking at me with what looks like hunger to me, and I shiver, sending waves across the net. I wonder if her people eat their Husbandos as well. She's now my terrible shadow, always hungry, always furious, forcing me to wear the spider-silk clothes she crafts for me and sing my songs to her while she devours a still-living prey.

Outrealmers are impossibly easy to spot, I have come to find. Sure, we all know of their strange accents and bizarre injokes that they have brought with them from what has come to be known as the Far Realm and yes (I do not believe I will understand what is so humorous about the phrase “touch fluffy tail”), more often than not you will find them chatting up some nonhuman lass (or lad, in the case of some of them. They do not seem to judge), but there is something deeper than that. Something instantly recognizable the moment you look at them. Something...off, but not inherently wrong. They rarely seem to be in ill temper (lest you should insult their waifu, though even then the rage soon dissipates along with the offender’s spine) and they seem to hold different values. I have only spent a short time in the land of Teegee, and I still don't understand it all, but I will try to catalogue that I do comprehend, so that others will come to know why I chose to forsake my old life in favor of this one.

The first thing of note is that the outrealmers love their stories. Be it stories of their old home (a bizarre place that lacks magic yet contains magical constructs like hollow metal dragons!) or of other realms that simply do not exist, at least as far as they know. Their favorite stories seem to be the exploits of themselves and others, which is why so many of them took so keenly to adventuring, a thing that they could only pretend to do in the Far Realm.

>>20672050
And done! Please excuse all errors, I'm afraid English is not my first language and... yeah, I'm pretty sure I might have screwed it here and there. Anyway, hope you guys enjoyed the story.

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>>20672077
There is a certain fellowship here, that much is undeniable. One that stretches across time, space, and species. All are welcome in the land of Teegee, though none are forced to live here. If I were tell my younger self that he would be looking forward to his daily chats with a harpy mailwoman, he would spit in my face and scoff at my insolence. In this passage I have talked little on the concept of Waifu, the ideology that permeates this bizarre kingdom and binds it together. Perhaps at a later date when I more fully understand it, I shall attempt to do it justice. Sufficed to say in the meantime that it is a concept as alien as everything else the outrealmers brought with them, once again off but not inherently wrong.

-----Excerpts from the journal of Evarion Windfellow, former envoy of Drasavia, current whereabouts unimportant

>>20672050
Brilliant sir scribe!

I really should be doing something other than writefagging... Damn you all for winning me over with this setting!
> All spelling mistakes are intentional. Without spellcheck, I suspect my writing quality would suffer quite significantly, as you'll see.

Desk of Sir [Nope], 17th day of Second Seed, 7th year after arrival

I have never been a man much given to a life of action, or perhaps it is more accurate to say that I WAS never much inclined to a life of action. Since coming to this strange and unusual land, I have found that many of us have had to re-assess our lifestyles and I am no exception to this rule. I think the term fa/tg/uys, has never been less apt than now. Like so many others have, I shall here endevour to set into record a full account of my own experiences in this new world, perhaps to serve as a guide, or comfort to any future generations of our order, or perhaps simply as a relic of bygone times, should we fade into nothingness and our new home be discovered by some intrepid adventurer in some long-distant age.

>> 20672316
It seems so strange, even now, to contemplate our way of life surviving. In the earliest of days after arrival, it seemed unlikely we would survive two weeks, let alone through the winter. I was one of the few lucky ones to have anything useful on my person when I was drawn through the portal like a fish on the line. When I cast my eyes upon that image and felt the pull, I tried to resist, to grasp at anything to anchor me to the world I knew. In my desperation, I grabbed at the bookcase so near my desk, so that when I was pulled though, I brought with me a fantasy book, a book on Roman history and most importantly for our initial survival, a book on bushcraft by a renouned survival expert. I had no tools, but a few others had pen-knives and the like, so we were able to survive at least a little while. Some, sadly, could not cope with the strain of the change. Far too many of us either starved, fell to accidents and infection, or, most tragically, simply took their own lives.

>>20672325
A few of us tried to explore the forest, near to the castle in which we had appeared. Few returned, sad to say. Then, the winter began to close in on us. I heard a few of our number remark that it was similar to the situation the pilgrim fathers of America had faced in their first year in that country. The obvious difference, of course, was that, unlike those pioneers, we had no-one to show us how to survive in this unknown environment. Even with the knowlege we possessed between us all, a cold and terrible certainty slipped into our hearts that few, if any of us, would likely live to see the spring. A few of the 'Council of DMs' as they had begun to call themselves and of which I was one, proposed leaving the castle and trying to find civilization, but the fate of those who had been found in the forest disuaded us. Weak and starving as we were, we had no desire to face those who fired the finely-crafted arrows.

Dammit, I have more writefaggotry in the works, but I have to leave. This thread better still be alive in a few hours.

>>20672363
When the Felim found us... I am not ashamed to admit that I was among the number that fell to their knees and wept in relief. After living on handfulls of rosehips and what little else we had gathered for eight weeks, nothing has ever tasted sweeter in all my life than the broth they served us that day. After a few weeks of treatment, as the world started to thaw with the coming of spring, we too felt strength and life returning to us. With the Felim's coming, we found new hope that maybe we could survive after all! With that hope and vitality, came a new sense of purpose and pride. To this day, I have seldom seen a more steadfast brotherhood than that of those who survived that first winter. So when we again found bodies of those of us who had sought to clear land for farming, slain by those same arrows as the year before, it is little wonder that it awoke a fire in our hearts I hope never to see again.

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The days of the group that would become the Knights Harem stands as a point in history that many of us would rather forget. We, an ill-prepared group of strangers, were brought to this realm through means none of us have yet to understand. Those days were tragic, with most of us not making it through the first winter. Some, myself included, gave up our old names, half from the shame of our failures and half to aspire to something else, if only we make it through this alive. Our shelter, an old, abandoned citadel, was only marginally better than nothing, and what food we risked our lives to scavenge from the surrounding woods was not enough to keep us alive. Even now, all these years later, I still have to look back and wonder if there was more I could have done to have saved at least a few more of my fellows.

I shall spare you the details, as the memoirs of my fellow knights would no doubt do it more justice than I ever could, but we were a sorry sight indeed when the benevolent Felim found us, with most of us too weak from sickness, hunger, and exposure to do much, but they took pity on we poor souls and helped us. This and our subsequent struggles against the elves are also better documented by those with a better grasp of the details than myself, and my role in that war, if you will call it that, was limited mostly to a support role, getting my fellows into something resembling good physical condition, no mean feat after the winter, mind you, and during the battle itself relaying and carrying out the orders of those with a better tactical grasp than I posses.