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File: 1344623806123.jpg-(92 KB, 720x443, That guy... Is awesome!.jpg)
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Can we have an awesome that guy thread?
>pic related
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Kind of related?
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OP I think what you want is a This Guy thread, not a That Guy thread. That Guys are the worst people ever, the bane of any good gaming group, This Guys are the exact opposite, amazing gaming bros.
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I have a few more, I think. Looking now.
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>>20263974
>>
Does anyone know of a This Guy that played a monk? I'm fairly new to pen and paper stuff and I want to be a good monk, so I'm looking for role models.
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>>20263990
No, but there are these fellows you might want to use as an example.
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>>20263922
Oh, whoops. My bad.
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>>20263980

And I think I'm out. The other two screencaps I have that fit what you're asking for, OP, have already been posted.
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>>20263848
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LIo2mRqQWTI
totally reminds me of this.
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>>20263997
How in the fuck does WHM manage to be so amazingly awesome all the time?
I think we should convince him to dump stories in a thread until he runs out of good ones.
Except that would probably be multiple threads worth.
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>>20263997
So is the lesson don't be a monk? Because I feel ready to learn that lesson.

Also, my sides are hurting on their own.
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>>20264103
I think the lesson is whether you succeed or fail, do it together, and do it spectacularly.
>>
Monk Guide: TreantMonk's Guide to Monks, for Pathfinder:

http://www.d20pfsrd.com/extras/community-creations/treatmonks-lab/treantmonk-s-guide-to-monks

In Pathfinder, monks are actually quite good IF YOU BUILD THEM RIGHT (most people don't, hence the guide). In every other D&D edition I've seen, Monks are steaming piles of crap, but then, I prefer Pathfinder in general anyway, so it's not a problem for me.

In any case, more THIS GUY stories please.
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>>20264086
simple: he doesn't.

He's said it himself that no one wants to hear about the wizard who quietly helped save the world and only shares his best stuff with us.
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>>20264193
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>>20264162
That's beautiful, man. Goddamn beautiful.
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>>20264209
the man that did this should get fuck ton of metals.
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>>20264266

Waffles is the hero Gotham Deserves.
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You know one of his group members came by and started doing an depth story of Old Man Henderson right?
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>>20264209
WHM is a hero.

time to find out if this isn't already posted somewhere else on /tg/ today.
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>>20264318
yeah, it's on suptg, the wiki page for Old Man Henderson and everything.

I was going to post that myself after posting this.
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>>20264318
He's not just doing a retelling of Henderson.
He's retelling the whole campaign, upon our request, just so we can see what Henderson was fucking over.
It really is glorious.
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>>20264345
I wonder what happened to him?

He just stopped the story like 2 days after he began it.
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>>20264357
Beggar can't be choosers I guess.
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>>20264357
>my screencap
Nice.
I'd be willing to make them all look like that for consistency.

He said he was busy for the week.
Hope he comes back soon.
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>>20264386
Old using it because I was too lazy to make my own.
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>>20264357
he said
>I'm gonna call it there for now. Need sleep and shit. Not sure when the next one will be, since I'm gonna be pretty bust for the next week.

>Glad /tg/ likes storytime though."

http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/20097465/#p20111523
>Not sure when the next one will be, since I'm gonna be pretty bust for the next week.

that means it's whenever it happens, it happens.
But you know it will be gold when it does since a lot of shit must've gone down between the tanker truck incident and the yacht dropping.
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>>20264406
I know but I want it to happen now!

I love this fucking story. I want a movie of it made! Fuck we should start a kickstarter for one.
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>>20264386
Personally I prefer them more like the other OMH caps are.
The way the font is on yours is kinda thin and hurts my eyes a bit.
No offense though.
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>>20264422
What he said.
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>>20264422
I'm always messing with the font, can never find settings even I like.
Sorry about that.

I just REALLY hate the indenting 4chan adds.
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>>20264450
I have it set to the default setting and it looks like pic related.
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He's the hero we deserve, but not the one we need right now. He's a silent guardian, a watchful protector, a fa/tg/uy.

The hero we need now is a janitor to stop the shitposting
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>>20264487
I've seen more than a few threads disappear with a whisper these past few days. Henderson is among us, anon. And he still hasn't found his wee men.
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>>20264487
He's a shitty exaggerated THAT GUY.

He's basically a emblem for all the THAT GUYS pretending to be fa/tg/uys to hide behind.
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>>20264524

Did you even read the story of how he made Old Man Henderson?

The GM had it coming, and he actually typed up a fucking 300 page story full of random shit.

If you don't like him get off of this board and never return.
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>>20264524
nah, he's a This Guy playing as a That Guy in a way that's appropriate for the situation.

regardless, there are other stories to post aside from WHM ones.
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>>20264583
WHM are the best ones.
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>>20264480
You seem to think indentation only refers to text.
This is mine with a comparison.

Those indentations make me want to read that post, instead of the post I'm on, which can ruin a story.
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>>20264599
That's the stupidest OCD thing I have ever heard in my entire life.
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>>20264536
I don't think you understand what "had it coming" means. The GM had a discussion coming, not some chucklefuck pulling juvenile and unhilarious hijinks.

It's like you THAT GUYS don't know how to not be passive aggressive in the worst ways.
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>>20264613
Not wanting a story ruined because of a simple thing your mind does is OCD and stupid?
I'm sorry, I guess I should post how every book you would like ends, since that apparently wouldn't make you mad at all.
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>>20264599
mine doesn't look like either of those.

I suppose it resembles the lower one, but did you add all those black boxes yourself or are they just there?
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>>20264650
I added those to emphasize my point.

The inconsistent post length draws attention to a short one that's between long ones.
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>>20264318

WHM, the Tucker Max of /tg/.
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>>20264666
I actually like that feature.
Makes me feel like I'm playing tetras with my posts.

To each their own I guess.
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>>20264701

Oho! Wackiness!
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I see.
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>>20263922
I move to change the title of 'This Guy'/'That Awesome dude' to 'The Man' for easier clarification in the future
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I got enough free time to do the story of Henderson's 'Hat Trick'.

While killing a god is cool and all, that happens a lot in Tabletop Games. Granted it was a first for a CoC inspired game, but I digress.

Henderson has another record that I find far more irritating, for obvious reasons: Henderson is the only PC I've ever seen to manage to kill the same player's characters four times in a single session.

Namely mine. The bastard.

I'm gonna type this up in chunk around what I'm already doing, so don't be surprised if this takes a while.
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>>20271993

Technically I mistyped the end of the last thread: I REROLLED three times in one sitting, but I already had one character ready to go at the beginning.

When we first arrived for the game that day, I was determined to not get upset of a character death. It's just a game, all pretend.

I failed, eventually.

I don't even remember the name of my first character. The session began with the cultists using a mob front, planning to kill the son of a rival crime family. Incidentally, the same one Jim used to work for.

I was playing the role of the bodyguard, and I was quickly knocked out and thrown in the trunk of one car, while the kid was loaded into the back-seat of another.

Enter stage left: Henderson and Will. They see them wacky cultists up to no good, and they decide to nick the vehicle with the visible hostage. While will hotwired it, Henderson punched a hole in the gas-tank of their second car, and lit it off. They then sped away after unknowingly leaving my character to burn screaming in the trunk of the second car.

Approximate elapsed time between the start of the session and first character death? Two minutes and thirty seconds.
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>>20272083

I promptly rolled up a second character, and agreed with the GM that I should wait until a more appropriate time to join the scene than in the middle of a drive across town.

They then decide to pull into a local bar with the Don's kid to help him get off his problem.

My second character of the evening's name was Ronald. Ronald was a used car salesman coming off the tail-end of a bad divorce in which his wife gained all their worldly possessions, and then promptly killed herself and left it all to the new church she had found: The Disciples of the Yellow King.

At this pint in time, he was playing darts. Unbeknownst to him, a cultist from that church just let loose a powerful entropy curse after the car that was stolen from them. A curse with a very specific target: The brake-lines of the car coming in for a hard stop just outside.

Ronald looked at the perfect game he was playing, and felt genuine joy for the first time in weeks. Then he was ripped in half by a BMW coming through the brick wall behind him. This was less than ten minutes after the first death of the evening.
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>>20272165

Henderson gets out of the car, and the Bartender with the mob connections immediately puts a gun in his face.

"What the bloody hell do ya think you're doing?"

"Trying to escort a young man to safety. Damn cultists must've cut the brakes."

The bartender then recognizes the Don's son, and calls him over to see if he's alright. Danny, the boy, is confused but mostly unhurt. This saved Henderson's life, but the GM soundly refused to let me just take control of such a politically powerful character just to get back into the game quicker, so I started to roll up another: a cop, looking into a lead in a weird house across town.

A weird house connected to a cold case that his old friend Al asked about immediately before his mysterious death in the middle of a huge explosion.

A place the mob had just told Henderson and Will that should have answers for some of the questions they had, as a favor for saving their son.

They get there after me, and open the door to creep inside. I've already investigated the upstairs, and found notes saying something about a lab in the basement. Henderson in the meantime, had gone straight down on the logic of 'what the hell kind of evil cultist just fucks around in the living room when they have a creepy ass cellar to play with?'
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>>20264193
>"I turn into a moped. Beep Beep!"
>>
please keep going
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>>20272229

He finds an old summoning circle down there, and decides to spit in it's general direction, accidentally activating it as he walks out the far door, finding nothing of 'interest' in the room. Upon discovering that this other door leads outside, he circles back around into the house, and winds up in the study with Will.

Meanwhile, with my new lead pointing me at the basement, I run in, see the horrible thing taking shape, botch the FUCK out of my save against 'crawl into the fetal position and cry while losing 2d10 sanity'. Henderson meanwhile picks up a book off the shelf and flips it open to a random page.

"What the hell kinda gobblydegook is this anyway? How are you supposed to pronounce this: Al'whya al Cthulhu fhatagan? K'kili'far al is ar'arkas fal dep'wa?"He turns to Will, completely oblivious to the be-tentacled beast he just conjured into existence behind him, cocked eyebrow barely visible above the rim of his sunglasses. "What does that even MEAN? What's the point of wasting paper with that sort of nonsense?"

Will, having barely failed his SAN check, loses five points from his score and points behind him muttering something about a thing that 'should not be'. Henderson chuckles and says how he's not going to fall for that one again. Last time he did the tranny he was interrogating vis-a-vis his lawn gnomes had 'her' pimp beat the shit out of him and steal his wallet. So he leads Will to the kitchen, leaving the monster to it's own devices.
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>>20272689

In the kitchen, Henderson continues to be disappointed with the continuing lack of clues, while the professor is overjoyed to discover that the liquor cabnet was never emptied by the previous owners, and helps himself to a bottle.

Then with the local cultists getting a report of Henderson's location, proceed to kick in the door to come kill him.

Three of them are eaten by the thing Henderson summoned in the study, and while they're screaming the two of them take a peek at the next room, and Henderson smashes all the alcohol and lights it off while they run out the back door.

The abomination in the basement with me does nothing of importantance, while I regain my wits and attempt to leave. I burst out the way I came, see the fire, and immediately have a SECOND breakdown caused by a pre-existing phobia of fire (randomly rolled for) and then die burning, screaming in pain and terror.

Much like the cultists and the monsters.

Meanwhile, Will is asking Henderson why his car only has the Credence Clearwater Revival playing ever. It turns out that it's because the CD is jammed in there and the radio is broke. Henderson just never bother to fix it because Credence is awesome.

So they ride away happily listening to 'Around the Bend' while I fucking died for the third time in the last hour. At this point I was beginning to get a little pissy and break my promise to myself to not let the game get to me.
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>>20272807
I know it's laughing at your misfortune, but that's amazing.

Was he actively trying to geek you, or was the GM, or was it just amazing (bad) luck?
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>>20272875
Seems like amazingly bad luck.
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>>20272807
You have some pretty awesome stories.
>>
And he's not even near the end yet. Given what the original Henderson stories told, this "extended cut" could inflict SAN damage by the time he's done.

I'm currently assuming he's still writing the next section. Might be 2AM here, but this is worth staying up for.
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>>20272875

Nope. Technically, In Character, he never even fucking knew I was there.

>>20273252

I've been gaming and hanging with WHM for years. I have stories.

>>20273271

Technically, I can't even finish this section tonight. I'll do it in the morning if the thread's alive, otherwise I'll copy/paste it into a new thread later on.
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>>20264632
shut the fuck up
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>>20273280
Ah well, thanks for at least letting us know. I shall look forward to the continuation.
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>>20273280
>kills three characters in an hour due to rolls and narative
>"didn't even know I was there"
This is why we love the character of OHM. He is crazy awesome without even knowing it.
>>
>bunch of kids dick riding a tripfag over a few obviously fake stories
Wow, /tg/ is such shit nowadays.
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>>20273534
Truth is stranger than fiction.
Also, show me his trip.
>>
Shall I see if I can cap the bits we got today?
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>>20275932
Do it.
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>>20275959
Done.

Shall I post the other 3 caps of Nowhere's stories while I'm here?
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aw what?

Posting this so that A Self Called 'Nowhere' or WHM can see it.
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>>20276036
Derp, they're already there. That'll teach me to skip to storytiem, won't it?

Polite sage for off-topic.
>>
Live damn you
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>>20273534

I can't find it anymore, but on the front page it used to say that any stories posted here should be considered fictitious and not taken seriously.

Are the stories of Waffle House Millionaire and A Self Called Nowhere real stories of gaming? Most likely not. There's a slim chance they could be, but I'm not holding my breath. Are those stories entertaining and fun to read? Very much so. Personally I find them absolutely fantastic and gratifying to read because even though I know that there's no way WHM actually put on a Luchador Mask and suplex'd a villainous grognard, it's still an awesome story and like any work of fiction, it's fun to believe for the duration of reading.

There's no need to take any of these stories so seriously, just enjoy the ones you find entertaining, and ignore the ones you don't. Sure, maybe that one anon didn't actually play a Bear who had a ridiculously high bluff and disguise, but it's funny anyway.
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>>20273280
I don't feel like hunting for a new thread later, so bump.
>>
>Playing homebrew with friends
>We manage to find a fucking dragon head and hatch it without dying horribly.
>Well fuck, our party knows jack shit about dragons
>Go to wizard guild or some shit
>Get learned on
>Party warrior activates home teleport stone on party
>GM decides that the party only includes the player, and leaves the dragon behind
>Have to go back to guild
>Guards won't let us back in despite us literally having gone through there ten minutes ago
>Hot-blooded warrior is literally about to bust some ass
>Suave warrior who has decent CHA smooth talks our way in
>Guard spits at the hot-blooded warrior
>Starts a fight
>All the wizards join in
>Hot-blooded warrior dies
>He bitches to the GM about it
>GM TPK's with a meteor
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>>20279391
dragon egg*
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>>20279458
>>20279391

You may have the single worst DM of all time.
That is absurd.
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>>20273534
>kids
>implying you're not the retarded /b/tard who just rolled over and has never heard of OMH
>>
/tg/ I have a confession to make.
I...
I don't get Old Man Henderson.
I mean, it's a good story, but I don't see what makes it, well, great.
Or rather, greater than the other great stories.

Does this make me a bad person?
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>>20280204
He derailed a mediocre DM's plot HUGELY.

HUGELY.
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>>20280204
Partly nostalgia, partly fucking with a GM that deserved it. But most of it's because the motherfucker killed Hastur. And he did it with style.
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>>20280247
Hugely?

He broke the universe. The fucking setting can never be used again for that game.

This is like an imperial guardsmen fighting his way to the throneroom and fixing the Golden Throne which instantly brings the Emperor back to life. Then the Guardsmen is actually both mission primarchs and the primarch to the Grey Knights while also being the Emperor's father who's also an Old One.
>>
I fucking love this Old Man Henderson Director's Cut
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>>20280280
> This is like an imperial guardsmen fighting his way to the throneroom and fixing the Golden Throne which instantly brings the Emperor back to life.
I agree on this, but:

> Then the Guardsmen is actually both mission primarchs and the primarch to the Grey Knights while also being the Emperor's father who's also an Old One.
This actually sounds like on of the more extreme mary sues.
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>>20281607
That's the point of the comparison.
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>>20281626
I really wouldn't call Henderson a Mary Sue. I mean, sure, it doesn't get more speshul than him and his 300page backstory, but c'mon. He's ugly, sociopathic, psychopathic, paranoid, and shizophren. And yes, he killed a Great Old One, but he did so during the game, using the valid game rules.
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>>20281773
The point of the comparison was to show how much he broke the setting.
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>>20281773

And he died in the end. He was a lucky mortal, but in the end he was mortal. Didn't stop him going down in a blaze of glory though.
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>>20281788
but a guardsman magically turning out to be all the stated things breaks the setting in a completly different way.
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>>20281807
You can't read very well can you?

Talking about the ends, not the means.
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>>20281838
But it's the means that make Henderson so awesome. Taking that away is like leaving the nazis out of ww2.
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Thank you ASCN, your stories are glorius
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>>20272807

>Picking up where I left off....

I roll up another character, determined to do SOMETHING of consequence in this session. I end up with a nasty street-fighting thug named Patrick.

Somebody in a yellow robe gave Pat a pile of money and a picture of Henderson, asking him to make sure he 'disappeared'. Now normally Pat would think twice about accepting such a shady deal, since he preferred to 'rough people up' since it couldn't get you 25 to life.

However, it was a LOT of money. And I was getting to be very bitter about the whole dieing every fucking session thing. So Pat agreed to the job. I figured that this would end with me either killing Henderson or us getting into a scuffle and then Pat switching teams.

Oh how wrong I was.

Turns out, Henderson wasn't a particularly tough fellow to find, since there's only one crazy old fucker with a mohawk and Hawaiian shirt running around reeking of cheep whiskey and porcelain.

When Pat caught up with him, Henderson was taking a piss in an alleyway on the cardboard 'home' of a hobo that just tried to mug him, now dead. As he finishes up, Pat taps him on the shoulder, and he turns.

"You Henderson?"

"Indeed I am." And then Pat's right hook hits him in the face and smashes his aviator shades into a useless mess of metal and glass shards. At which point Henderson very calmly pulls it off his face and pulls out a spare pair of shades, puts them on and comments "Well that was kinda rude."

Then Pat caught him with a left.
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>>20283705

Henderson then tosses the second useless pair of Sunglasses aside, dons a third set and then says "Now son, I've only got one more pair on me and I've got considerably less patience than that. What the bloody all loving fuck hell are you doin?"

"I got good money from a man in yellow saying that you're a no good son o' bitch who needs to be put down."

At this, Henderson puts on a very surprised and concerned face. "A man in yellow you say.... Son, I'm afraid that there's been a very big mistake here."

".... I've been lied to?"

"Nah, you're pretty spot on." Henderson replies, before shooting out both my knees with his concealed handgun, followed by a pair to the balls. "But no man gets between me and me wee men." He then walks out of the alleyway, leaving me to bleed to death, and everyone at the table kinda looks shocked at the fact that Henderson just blatantly executed a PC right there.

I will admit to flipping my shit a bit, while the GM went to consult his 'notes' I confronted him.

"Why the fuck did you just kill me?"

"What?"

"You just fucking shot me dead!"

"I shot a random guy who threatened my life and started trying to beat the shit out of me in the middle of a crime scene where I totally just murdered a hobo? Yes, yes I did. What possible reason could I have to NOT shoot you."

"It's ME you cock! I've already died like three times TODAY."

"That's metagaming."

I went to make the call for takeout, knowing that I would've hit him if I stayed.
>>
>>20283705
>>20283830
Well, he does have a point.
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>>20283902
So does the other guy.

>>20283830
But please, do continue good sir.
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>>20283705
>>20283830
here we go.
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Bumping this Epic Thread~
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>>20283830

Before anybody says anything, I know getting violently angry over a game is stupid, that's why I walked away before it got the better of me.

Nobody in the group (except maybe the GM) was a 'that guy', but we all had a tendency or two that could have put us into that category.

WHM has a thing about the 'rules' and about characters that I'm pretty sure are signs of his OCD coming to the fore. It's a really mild case, so you wouldn't even know he had it if you didn't notice little things: like the fact that he never has the volume set for an 'odd' number.

If there are rules in place for a game, he expects them to be followed as written. If someone modifies the rules for some reason, that's fine as long as he knows in advance there's a change. The dice land as the dice land, and he tends to be very chill on the whole as long as you don't manage to piss him off.

Me, I like being a team player. I honestly hate playing a multiplayer game if it means going against my friends. I think this quirk may have eventually rubbed off on WHM as far as Vidya are concerned, but I digress.

So one of my sore spots is basically infighting. If two people start to have a fight, IC or OOC it ruins the fun for me. I don't give a shit if the random kobolds we're beating up are having a bad day. I give no shits about some random guy in a server I keep sniping. but that guy I'm shooting isn't Dave, my friend who let me move in after I had a bad breakup. That Kobold isn't Mike's new PC.
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>>20284013

Personally, I think this is where the line between That Guy and the rest of us is drawn: We're all geeks and nerds. Given what gets posted on /tg/ and 4chan at large on a daily basis I think it's fair to say that we're all assholes to some degree as well.

We all have in us some quality or two that might be detestable. The difference between us and 'That Guy' is that we're TRYING to at least be 'acceptable' if not good.

But now I've gotten off topic a bit.

I opted to go for a quick drive to get the pizza since it was a bit cheaper, and we were taking a break anyway. WHM decides to go with me, defeating the purpose of me trying to get away and clear my head.

On the way there was probably the time where we actually became friends. You see, up until this point we'd just been kinda hanging out in the same group, playing games and shit. But on this day.... I don't know what prompted it, but I got angry, and I kinda yelled at him. He took it in stride, came back with a reasoned argument and let the matter drop.

On the way back we bickered over stupid shit, but I think out of all the crazy shit I've seen and done with him: near death experiences, epic games, lan parties, late nights having to go help a friend, that time he talked down a jumper.... this was the one that stuck with me the most. Partly because I'd never before seen anybody just let their guard down and be honest like that.

I won't share what we talked about, except this: He actually bought St Anger.
>>
>>20284178

>He actually bought St. Anger

For fucks sake, are you ever going to let me live that down?
>>
>>20284195

That CD was fucking garbage and you know it.
>>
>>20284178

Tell me you didn't talk him into it. Tell me the fight was over him buying it. Because otherwise I have zero respect for you as a gamer, as someone who appreciates music, and as a human being.
>>
>>20284203

I didn't at the time!

Fuck, Metallica's pretty consistently awesome, how the hell was I supposed to know THAT was the album they were going to fuck up?

It was two fucking years before we even met, and I already apologized for it.
>>
>>20284228

Make all the fucking excuses you want man, the truth's out there now.

Now all the internets know you done goofed.
>>
>>20284252

Yep, he dun goofed.
>>
>20284178
>20284195
>20284203
>20284228

I fucking love you guys.
>>
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>>20284178
>>20284195
>>20284203
>>20284228
>>20284252
>>20284262

This is gold. You two are like an internet comedy routine. Continue!
>>
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pic related
and someone finally drew Rupert.
>>
>>20284178

BACK TO THE STORY AT HAND-

We get back to the table, and the GM has got some new stuff lined up. I decide to opt out of re-rolling and rejoining even though we were only like halfway through the session because I wasn't ready to have another character killed off just yet.

Will and Henderson bounce around trying to find a lead to work with for the whole 'revenge' plot they were kinda working on. They ended up meeting up with Jimmy to try and talk his girlfriend out of being a cultist.

Which ended up fantastic.

Jimmy basically agrees to go to one of the meetings if she promised to seriously have a chat with him afterwards about the whole 'joining a cult' thing. She agreed basically telling him that he'd totally change his mind once he saw what it was all about.

Jimmy was a smart boy, and he called Henderson's cellphone for backup in case things went south.

So pretty soon, Henderson and Will are sitting outside the church on the curb.

Waiting.

Henderson breaks the silence. "Man, I fucking hate stakeouts."

"They aren't that bad."

"Last time I was on a stakeout, two of my friends got killed and your bar burnt down."

"... does this shit happen on a regular basis with you?"

"Not causing it. Well, not usually. I remember I got arrested about a year ago for scaring a cook shitless."

"What? Why?"

"I told the motherfucker that I was allergic to olives. I get olives on my everything. I coulda fucking died if I didn't check it out."
>>
you know what?
fuck sleep, I was already up late watching toonami anyway.
>>
>>20284554

There's a silence.

Then "Fuck it, there's a Best Buy and a video rental place around the corner. I vote we get one of those portable DVD things and a movie."

"Fuck yes. Shit, we're just here in case Jimmy calls us, let's get baked and watch something funny."

So they went and got a copy of Grandma's Boy., got high, and laughed their asses off.

In public, outside a church they're supposed to be watching for cultists that already know what Henderson looks like.

Surprisingly, nothing comes of this until Jimmy calls them from inside the church. apparently they just called up some kinda demon, and told it to eat his girlfriend and him as a sacrifice to their god.

His girlfriend, shocked at the sudden change in tone from the companionable welcoming air that was there before, suddenly realizes that cults aren't as awesome as she thought.

And that's when Henderson and Will run inside, guns drawn. Jimmy, wise man he is, grabs his girlfriend and ducks, while full auto-shotgun spray kills every motherfucker in the room.

They go outside and into the car, Henderson starts it up while Will keeps the arson streak alive and sets the building on fire. As they pull away, Kary (Jimmy's girlfriend) goes all 'my hero' on them, and soon the two freaked teenagers are 'getting busy' in the back seat. Will looks shocked, while Henderson lights the bong up and starts hot-boxing while cranking up the stereo.

Which is when they passed a cop going in the opposite direction.
>>
I figure this is as good a place as any to ask this, but does anyone have the screencap of the hobo who keeps appearing in random games with a couch in surprisingly good condition?
>>
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>>20284904
Boxcar Joe?
>>
>>20284911
That's the ticket!
>>
>>20284911
This is fucking amazing.

I might actually make a bard for another campaign named Boxcar Joe.
>>
>>20284974
You don't make Boxcar Joe. Boxcar Joe finds you.
>>
>>20284982
...
Very valid point. Maybe not then.

What about an NPC cameo.
>>
>>20284974
You don't "make" Boxcar Joe from what I gathered. You have to use a random character generator and hope that he joins your game.
>>
>>20284911
If you really start to think of the implications, Boxcar Joe starts to turn into a /tg/ themed creepypasta.
Like there's some kind of nutball diety out there that's metagaming.
>>
>>20284997
We discussed this in one thread. Basically, Boxcar Joe and OMH = Gork and Mork. Insanely powerful godbeings that spend their days just dicking around with people.

Either that or Joe is like that SCP Frank who inserts himself into stories just because.
>>
>>20284982
See, that's one thing I've always wondered. Which random generators were used that included a sofa in the loot tables? I've never seen one that even does that.
>>
>>20285029
you mean in that Scraploota thread last night or so?

Boxcar Joe is sorta everywhere and nowhere and Old Man Henderson is currently in transit between dimensions last I heard of his most recent exploits.

Plenty of potential for weird shit to happen.
>>
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Obligatory. Part 1
>>
>>20284800

To this day, I giggle to myself thinking about what that cop must've been thinking when he saw that.

There's Henderson 'driving' the car, taking a hit off a bong the size of god, next to him is a dude who looks like a slightly less fat Kevin Smith looking bored out the window, there's so much smoke inside that you'd think the car's on fire, and there's a couple of people obviously fucking in the back seat.

I'd like to think that he was thinking about his family, or going to watch a hockey game at the bar with his friends. Or maybe finally asking the cute waitress out.

I just.... some part of me desperately wants to know why it took him two blocks to process what he just saw.

Henderson just keeps going, not a care in the world.

Cop turns around and starts to follow him.

Henderson keeps going.

Cop turns on his lights.

Henderson keeps going.

"Sir, pull over the vehicle." The cops says into his loudspeaker.

Henderson pulls into a drive-through.

The cops walks up halfway through an order for tacos and polietly asks what the fuck he's doing. Henderson responds with a 'hold on a sec' gesture and finishes his order. Then he asks if the cop wants anything.

The cop asks him to please step out of the car, sir. Offers of a chalupa are denied.
>>
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>>20285092
Part 2
>>
>>20264480
>chew through concrete in under a minute
>thickness unspecified

Behind every 3.5 caster exploit is a Dungeon Master too fucking stupid to breathe.
>>
>>20285105
Go on...
>>
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>>20285105

I'm patiently waiting for continuation.
>>
>>20285105

Henderson gets out of the car, a plume of smoke accompanying his exit, Jimmy and Kary are kinda blushing and avoiding eye-contact, mostly having recuperated.

Will, having seen three cosmic horrors in the last day, killed a bunch of people, and is still coping with the loss of his bar... apparently has no fucks to give. He just sits there, high off his ass listening to 'Fortunate Son'.

The cop interrogates him as to why he didn't pull over, and Henderson responds that was because he was color-blind, and that he didn't realize there was a cop behind him.

The cop asks him why he smelled like weed, and Henderson replied that it was because he just smoked a huge fucking bowl, but it's cool because he has one of those medical licenses.

When asked about the kids in the backseat, he stated confusion, and asked what kids, before looking back and seeing Jimmy.

"Hey Jimmy, when'd you get here?"

"You... you came to pick us up."

"No shit?" He turned to the cop. "Tell you what, memories the first thing to go, followed right by the memory. So how can I help you officer?"

After replaying the conversation a few more times, the cop made Will drive and they left relatively unmolested with their tacos.

I think Imma gonna call it there for today.
>>
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>>20285883
Thanks for the story.
Have a good night.
Have some owls.
>>
>>20285883
When... when will you be back?
This story... it's just so epic...
Must talk with.. overuse of ellipses...
>>
>>20285918

Man, fuck owls. Fuck all owls forever.

One time, I went to visit a friend. Went inside, there was an owl on a branch nearby. When I left, there were 15. Upon seeing me, the immediately took off in a coordinated swoop, and shat at least three gallons of owl-shit all over my fucking car.
>>
>>20285944
Owls don't shit. They throw up compacted corpses.
>>
>>20285976

..... Then it was some kind of bird that looked remarkably Owl-like, because there was all kinda of bird-shit all over everything.
>>
>>20285976
They do both.
>>
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Screencaped for future generations
>>
>>20285944
>>20286010
Excuse me, Mr. Millionaire?
A few friends and I are putting together a tabletop-centric website and one idea we had for a feature was dramatic readings of epic /tg/ stories. Is it alright if we do this with the OMH story?
>>
>>20286121

Man, I've been trying to get my own gaming site off the ground for like a year now. If you want to repost it there, be my guest.

Just make sure proper credits, etc.
>>
>>20286162
Cool, link your site?
>>
>>20286223

Don't have one yet.

Since, you know, it's been a massive cluster-fuck for like a year now.
>>
I seriously want to know the whole story of OMH now, despite seeing Daffy Duck molesting wildlife with his tentacle arms in my sleep last night (really, thanks to the asshole who actually DREW that image)
>>
>>20286291

Wait, what?

No really what? That what?
>>
>>20286314

>>20276059
>>
It's in this very thread, just up there^
>>20276059
There's also a pic of OMH smoking a necronomiblunt with his parrot
>>
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>>20279391
>playing a homebrew with a bunch of friends
>they have somehow acquired a dragon egg, I've no clue - I wasn't there
>we now have a baby dragon running loose, we've no idea how to control it
>we decide to go to a Mage's Guild, hoping that they would know more of dragon lore
>given special passes to be able to roam around, get constantly embarrassed by the others in front of the mages
>once all has been said and done, we teleport out of there; leaving our dragon behind. Woops.
>brawler runs all the way back to the guild and demands to be let in
>guards tell him to fuck off because they aren't allowed to just let people in without the proper documentation
>he kills two of them for spitting on his foot before being teleported away by another party member
>meteor falls, everyone dies.
>mfw
>>
I'll just check /tg/ for a sec, then go to bed.
>see OMH thread
The sun will be up soon...
>>
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>>20284178
And now let no man forget it.
>>
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I'm rather partial to this one.
>>
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>>20286291
you are welcome.

I didn't draw it, but I asked for that in a /co/ drawthread.
>>
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>>20286566
DM here, not my fault he bitched so much he turned the entire session in a drama-fest that nobody could stand.

I've been trying to restart the game, y'know.
>>
>>20289122
No you haven't. You haven't mentioned a damn thing about it.
>>
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>>20289153
Shit man, you missed it?
I spoked with the IRC already. I'm just waiting on that guy to come back from the hospital.
>>
>>20289162
He's been back. We had a whole fucking thing about it, you triple nigger.

And you better not try to start it when the other one gets back and I try to start the other Homebrew.
>>
>>20289162
>spoked
Jesus Christ, pardon me. I just woke up.
>>
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>>20289168
He isn't back home yet, he's been on and off for very short periods of time.

Or did he confirm going back home fully recovered already?
>>
>>20289181
He should be back by tomorrow or so.
>>
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>>20289185
Good enough for me. Let's do this shitnazz whenever possible.
>>
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>>20289122
>>20289162
>>20289181

I don't care what you're talking about, but keep it up with the 'why' faces. I've been trying to rebuild my collection of those after my hard drive asploded.
>>
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>>20289200
Are you sure? My folder is chock full of them, man. And wouldn't spamming these be considered against the rules?
>>
>>20289208
Just upload the folder and send it to him.
>>
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>>20289208

DO IT.
>>
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>>20289246
Here you go friend. Had less than I thought, but still.

http://www.2shared.com/file/As7pDnZw/HahaTimeForKornhauser.html
>>
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>>20289286

Where in the nine hells did you get this one?!
>>
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>>20289303
>nine hells
There's your answer.
>>
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lol
>>
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So I'm playing a Bleach based D20 game. The guy who almost always runs is getting to play and one of the other guys is taking over, so I was kinda cool just to try it out.

One guy, good role player, builds himself a Quincy. He was adopted, and one of his biological parents where shinigami, so his spiritual strength is understandable. I make myself a Shinigami, stealth style with Kido. The other two who aren't as frequently at game are a guy who usually makes Clerics makes a Shinigami who specializes in healing and a Shinigami character who has put everything into unknown power for Shikai and Bankai.

Our usual GM sits down and makes a Hollow, that's basically Philosoraptor. I read the sheet, and it's pretty basic, and get a few laughs here and there. Got a disadvantage in Extreme Phobia - Housecats and Under Gender, the guy just put "Raptor."

We get into game and The Raptor and the Quincy basically bro it up, because the Raptor only kills and eats hollows. The Raptor and I don't get along that well, after-all I am a Shinigami and he's a hollow.

We end up in one battle and the GM tosses out something fuck-powerful, and it hits the Raptor into Negitive HP with one hit, to where Raptor shoulda been pushing up daises. But because he fucked up, he was like "Alright, so the blow rips your mask up and you dematerialize. You reform in the hollow world and become an Arrancar,"

The Quincy goes Rage mode and he and I barely finish that battle, heal up and go back out hunting everything possible down. I'm more going out of being a bro with the Quincy than anything else.

Next session we have a big battle that a 5 foot something green haired girl saves us from, by punching the huge hollow out, then eating it. Turns out that the Ratpor's player decided that the "Clever-Girl" jokes we kept making should be more apt.
>>
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>>20290887
Philosoraptor guy gets a phone call last session and steps out saying his character will catch up, while I end up patrolling the city with Quincy guy. We end up running into the crazy, "The End is Nigh!" kinda hobo who is preaching how the land will be destroyed by big monsters. When he can see me, we realize he's talking about hollow's and he isn't quite crazy. We try talking him down but my presence kinda drives him over the edge and he pulls out this little trinket.

The Quincy player makes a knowledge roll and informs me that the thing is concentrated Hollow-Bait. He's holding it, ready to break it, while we try to talk him down, when Hollow guy comes in and is like "So, what did I miss?" DM informs him "You catch up to the party, but need to give me a will save DC 15."

Me and the Quincy look at each other realizing, that he's a hollow, so this is going to be horrible if he fails but we relax when he says, "Ah, I've got a base of 16," and then proceeds to roll a one.

So long story short, Raptor lost control and bit off the hobo's hand, and broke the hollow bait by biting down. Thousands of hollows are coming out of the now cracking sky, our primary fighter is rolling on the ground like a cat in a field of catnip, and we left There on a cliffhanger.
>>
>>20289318
all I can think about with this is Orks Row the Third.

>>20285106
>>20285092
what is it with barbarians getting up to so many hijinks?
>>
bump
>>
bumping this glorius thread so more people can find OMH
>>
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>Advanced Race Guide for Pathfinder is released
>That Guy asks me to loan it
>"Sure why not"
>A week passes
>He sends me a message, wants to chat
>Presents a race he had created using the book
>Suspicions of furry confirmed
>Anthro-bears
>Horrendously overpowered
>58 RP used to create it
>Background consists of them being chaotic good
>Behind most of the major things in my world, even if slightly mentioned
>Wants to reroll his character
>nope.avi
>"But it's made with an official book!"
>mfw

>Comes to the game with a new character sheet
>Made with the custom race
>Give him his old character sheet
>More bullshit thrown towards me
>I'm the GM bitch
>Point out flaws with the race
>He remains mostly silent for the sessions
>>
>>20293204
This makes me kind of sad, in a sense.

Is it possible to do a custom-race in some settings without being called a Furry?
>>
>>20293369

... Don't use fur?
>>
>>20293369
I don't think it's the anthro-bears being a problem so much as 58 RP and being Mary-Sue as fuck.
>>
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>>20293429
I don't understand HOW you can get it up that high, a race let alone a bear race should never be that powerful.
>>
>>20293369
go extra-terrestrial and/or have them be life forms non-carbon based.
>>
>>20293369
Make em rocks. No one hates rocks.
>>
>>20295184

Or metal. Metal works well too.
>>
This story just keeps getting better and better.

How many people does OMH kill for gosh sakes?
>>
>>20295327
so far we know the professor, that guy who was a friend of the detective, the detective, some other guy, the bodyguard, that guy playing darts, the street thug, the hobo, that cop...
[more PCs here that we haven't gotten to yet]

and a whole mess of cultists.
>>
bump before bed, just cause I'm curious what else might come of this thread.


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