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/tg/ - Traditional Games

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So I've been told online RP'ing is an absolute nightmare 90% of the time.

Share with me, your horries stories of online role playing, /tg/.
That should be horror stories.

I apologize for my stupid fingers.
My Inquisitor Lord Commisar Grav Chutes in, he has a bandolier of six vortex grenades, two combi-bolt pistol plasma pistols, and a Lascannon Digi-Weapon Ring on each finger. His entire body is highly advanced experimental bionics built for him by the Fabricator General Himself. He has a conversion field and a sacred relic. He's also met the emperor.

I'm paraphrasing, but that was pretty much his introduction. Guy was in his twenties according to other forum users and to this day I'm sure he was being deadly serious.
freeform is always a nightmare, but playing on IRCs usually isn't that bad.
so wait, is this some sort of 40k freeform? the hell?
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I got one before I go to work

>Back in the day
>Gaia's Barton Town (When it was actually pretty good.)
>See a simple "Tavern RP"
>"All right. This sounds interesting enough. What's going on?"
>First few pages have three half demons/angels, a kitsune with daddy issues and a werewolf with vore issues
>"Fuck me. Really?"
>Decide to just tough it up and give it a shot
>Make an eldest son of the local blacksmith
>Order a cheap drink
>Casually ask the bartender, "What's with all these outsiders? They're starting to freak me out."
>Suddenly, everyone is on my case about how they're gonna banish me to some wayward plane of existence
>Get threatened with magical artifacts (All of which were named from that show Shaolin Showdown)
>Stand up and walk out

I then joined a literate Superhero RP. That was MUCH better.
Interesting mistake. I might start saying 'horries stories'; you never know, it could be a blessing in the skies.

Anyway, my story:

I'm DMing this game of Pathfinder for this chatroom I frequent and a few friends I know IRL because no one else is willing to do it. We run into a little trouble getting the characters up and deciding on a proper time, but we manage to get a session hammered out.

I start working through the nights to get maps done, encounters hammered out, and shit generally finished.

I remind everyone that day to show up. One guy says he can't. Another thinks he won't be able to, but that I should give him the session link anyway.

Well, OK. Then the time for our session rolls up. Out of five people, no one showed.

I've never DM'd again.
Online roleplaying generally consists of the following:

>No agreed setting or a very, very loose setting.
>People are allowed to play whatever they can imagine or steal from other settings.
>People only care about their own personal storylines - or if there is a main storyline, their role in the main storyline.
>It turns into personality cults where people worship the people with the strongest personalities and opinions and form into stuffy little cliques where they think they're the best roleplayers around.
>On this strange political stage, the only thing people really care about is who is fucking who. Becoming the lover of someone with a lot of power and reputation on a website grants you a bit of that respect as well.
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>online RP'ing

I hope you like pretending to fuck.
My friend roleplayed on Gaia.

He met a girl there, and after exchanging a good number of private messages they ended up meeting.

After courting each other and moving in together, he changed dramatically, adopting all of her interests and views, and essentially becoming a male-ish version of this girl. Any remnant of his old personality and identity was constantly drilled out of him, and once they became married, I realized that my friend was dead on the inside.

He now spends his days looking wistfully out of windows, trying to remember what dreaming was like.
40K freeform, a few years back. It was awful. We were basically investigating a plaent that the 'Nids had "left for some reason", most of us were just grunts, y'know, survival horror starring the Imperial Guard.

Not that faggot. I left pretty quickly after that.
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If it is...


And yeah, freeform can be such a nightmare. I'm in a couple right now as I wait for the rest of my group's schedules to mesh properly.

First one is this fantasy-themed RP where three of the players are these all-mighty dragons by night who had a beach episode right after wiping out a battalion. I found that... Iffy to say the least.

2nd one's actually not so bad; Ravenloft-themed gothic RP about a power struggle between 3 vampire siblings. Those guys are like the Borgias only with less of the sex. Just started, so I'm waiting to see how it goes.

My problem with both of them is really all on tangible details like their writing...
>I've never DM'd again.
I've never DM'd since.

I'm not illiterate, I'm on 2 hours of sleep.


I-I'm sorry... I-I just want to RP as a superhero...
>Join a game
>Not check full background first
>Introduce myself to some players for two hours
>One is a Mary Sue
>One is a male half-dragon Mary Sue
>Check the game forum
>Half of them furries
>DM is a furry
>Not even a furry/anthro based game

Having fun yet actually, but I wonder how long I'll last.
>>20260876 AGAIN

I actually forgot the worst part.

He was juggling Vortex Grenades as he grav chuted down, "it helped emphasise his great manual dexterity"
>Freeform Space Empire
>Nice range of diverse alien species
>I'm playing catholic lizard people, woo, originality.
>Game plays kind of like a freeform spore. I'm second-to-last man standing
>Second RP
>Less freeform, similar premise but adds much-needed Industry systems to control how many ships we can support. Numbers got crazy last game.
>Eliminated third, still put up a good show.
>Third RP in series
>Switches it up, humans on earth with different continents
>Currently getting invaded.
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It was a few years back, bud. Long gone by now. I had played an alien whose race had just discovered long term space travel. They were a plant-like race and as such required water and sunlight to survive. Apparently, the energy from the Earth's sun was much stronger than that of their homeplanet's. So they had sent me down to survey the planet on a very long term reconnaissance mission. Then I found the entire world going to shit because super powered baddies were shit stomping everywhere.

"Using the powers granted by the Earth's sun, the Alien now known as Sunburst, made his debut on the superhero stage!"

Damn, that was fun.
Oh gods...
Gaia RP. Fantasy Inn sorta place.
Girl was half-angel half-vampire half-werewolf.
Also fat IRL (like FAT FAT, not chubby or anything).
Online relationships are shit.
Want me to dig up some logs?
Logs are found.
Oh sweet gods... This is making me depressed and happy at the same time.
Depressed at how stupid I was
Happy that I am better than I was back then.
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>Just read "back in the day"

Oh, well... Might as well keep looking. Thanks, though. The search continues...

>pic related because a bedraggled-looking knight looking in the distance
Aw man, curse Gaia for not keeping older PM logs. I can't find the AWESOME fight scene where my character draws his dual katanas (one ice, one fire, obviously) and goes after the vampires who stole his wife (who was also pregnant).
There was no fight scene btw, just the vampires relinquishing her or something.
Hm... What could I dig up for you chaps...
>13 y/o brother suggests a free-form war game to me
>not interested
>asks me repeatedly over the next year
>finally decide to give it a shot
>*my sword cuts you!*
>write up a neatly formatted ten page introduction
>entire thread loses their shit and tries to recover

There was some crazy shit.
>Join up with DH game on /tg/
>Meet everyone over skype, bros all around. Have to get up fuck early in the mornings because they're all americans
>Get up, turn on computer
>Non of them are on
>Wait for 20 minutes
>Go to bed
>DM was sick or something, told the others the night before, couldn't tell me because I wasn't on
>Okay then.
>The happens again next week
>No explanation, non of them are on for the next week
>Finally give up

That was over a year ago now.

Still not sure of whether they just froze me out or if the game really just died.

I feel you, most-likely-east-european bro
Nah, I'm danish. But pretty close.
>Reading this thread
>Be Dane
>Going to DH game tomorrow
Where do you live, Dane-bro?
Mid-western Jutland. Ringkøbing-Skjern Kommune.
Can't help you then, I'm afraid.
København here.

Though I'm open to the idea of finding a couple of other danes and running it on Skype.
Yeah, I became somewhat disillusioned with Freeform RP over the course of about a year and a half. That was really all it took. I RP'd on a forum with a big kitchen sink (fantasy, sci-fi, alt-realities...) setting where pretty much anything went, and it was just a whole lot of whining and crying as a few mediocre RPers passive-aggressively attacked people, really bad RPers spammed their bullshit and either stuck around forever or left in a glorious huff, people put spoiler tags around hidden borderline gorn and other shit, and the odd good RPer sobbed uncontrollably in the corner and wondered why they couldn't leave.

I quietly left. Then I moved on to an MMO, mostly intending just to play with a friend, and we both got sucked into a wonderful world of guild drama, goldshire-tier RPers flexing their super saiyan dick-waving characters, and other bullshit like otherwise nice but far too clingy RPers that bordered on just plain fucking irritating.

Now I only roleplay with close friends, and in one on one or small groups to boot. Fuck the mess of freeform RP. There are just too many people and it's not worth weeding out the good ones from the bad.
Yeah, that would be pretty cool.
Jeg er fra København!
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>MFW Danes everywhere

If you guys have Skype or somesuch, we could do this.
On another note, I've got to run in five minutes or so.
Send email so we can arrange something.
I roleplayed a bit in forums for Nationstates. In which, well, you play states. It was extremely freeform by nature which was one of the biggest draws except when it lead to giant, infallible Mary Sues as everyone's nation was their personal baby or self insert and people taking turns for their opponent, which was forbidden but people still snuck it in. And on a more autism level of annoyance was people roleplaying as one of your ministers or god forbid, your leader, which I imagine would be even worse in an RP where you are just the one character.

It was still great when you were playing it more casually, but I am way out of my league with all the armchair generals in the official forums.

And to actually answer your question, my biggest horror story would be someone effectively going "your nation breaks under the strain of war and you have mass uprisings because I don't agree with the economic or political systems of it therefore it doesn't work".

I think
No idea if anyone remembers me, but I'm currently in a freeform roleplay.
Basically, I have no idea what the story is but there's several dozen vampires and a DEMON KING and some drama.

I've been told eight times that "I CAN DEFEAT YOU WITH A SWIPE OF MY PINKY" and then after calling them out on it, they've teleported away. 8 times. EIGHT. TIMES.

Our party consists of Me, a human. With a mace. That's my character. A big bearded man with a mace. In a land of vampire demon angel weebs.

An alchemist. (Not some anime shit. He actually mixes chemicals and drinks them/throws them)

A ninja with some latent demon blood. (Using it shortens his lifespan. He has never used it.)

A Frost Demon (Actually not a Mary Sue, plays his character like a slightly arrogant asshole who hates everyone equally. Joined us in fighting the demon king because he's actually the son of an ACTUAL DEMON KING and felt insulted.)

Another fa/tg/uy. An old gray wizard with magic that usually hurts him depending on how powerful the magic is.

A dragon, human form is a guy with horns and wings. Just joined our party, not a douchebag.

Oh and recently a traveling priest joined us. He too has a mace but his magic allows him to seal demons. He's the Frost Demon's brother (IRL) and his character was made out of necessity.
I'll let you do the organizing, I think.

Still sending an e-mail to >>20261338
This is so true. Any "fighting" turns into watching kids play "cops and robbers" or whatever the politically-correct version of that crap is these days.
>NUH UH I HAVE [item of dubious canon to his cahracter] THAT PROTECTS ME
>BUT I USED [weapon from other game made by same company as his character] IT TOTALLY WORKS
>another couple cybering distracts them
Either my email is stupid or you've written the wrong one, because it failed to send you an email.
Our enemies include "THE DEMON KING ALTAIR" who successfully fought off me, the alchemist, the frost demon, and the Ninja at the same time.
Let me explain how.
He used his WINGS to fight the Ninja.
He used one hand each to fight the Alchemist and the Demon.
And he fought me with a floating sword.

Just as we were getting the jump on him, a random girl blocks my mace. Ten year old witches come down the stairs and yell at us, and his wife yells at us "WHAT GIVES YOU THE RIGHT TO KILL MY HUSBAND? HE HAS A FAMILY."

Our Ninja responded with this little gem.

"Your husband became King by virtue of killing the queen. Did she not too have a life? A family? Ones who cared about her? What gives him the right to enslave others? To slaughter as he pleases?"

She ignored him. He knocked us all back, and teleported the Alchemist away. I grabbed Alchie's jacket and jumped out a window. The ninja smoke bombed off. The Demon shook his head and walked away.

I sort of lost interest but we met a few fa/tg/guys. One of them left (COME BACK WE MISS YOU.) because I sort of lost the will to continue.
Anyways, now we're back. There's some sort of overarching story now. My group just wants to start a safe haven and provide shelter to the refugees of the coming war.
It'll be great.

I have a few more stories, but nothing too long or exciting.
Fights only work between people who are bros OOC (And thus won't pull bullshit on each other, and will normally edit if you call them out), or if you plan the outcome ahead of time. Otherwise?

No joke, I know an RP where the guy flew another guy into the sun.
Try sending me one instead.
Another danefag near København.
Can I join in as well?
I ran an RP tavern in Ultima Online for a little while. Does that count? As with any RP group in real life or on the internet, we had the same mix of guys. People who think they're awesome but suck. People who try too hard. People who get anal when anything bad happens to them. Then you have the people who actually got quests from me and completed them. The bros who actually want to roleplay together.
Yup, email me or post your own email. Whatever floats your boat.
The one I was thinking in particular there was that horrible hodge-podge of whatever anime and videogames are popular that any teenage one of those with no restrictions becomes. Someone being thrown into the sun would not even have rated taking a screenshot of.

I did that in WoW a couple of times actually. Only once did someone who wasn't one of my friends prior play along. No joke, I sent some low level guy who was begging for money on a quest to go collect some boar meat or something. He came back about half an hour later with exactly as many as I'd asked for.
Dude got handed far more money than someone his level could have needed, just for actually playing along.
We had one douchebag, Nero, based on the guy from DMC.

He PM'd my little motley crew

"So all I've seen you do is start fights and then bitch. What's your guy's deal?"

The thing was we've never started anything. My first interaction in that roleplay was walking down a street when I was called out by a Vampire-Demon. She told me that she was all powerful and could destroy me. Then started walking away.
I told her she was scared.
She turned around, LAUGHED, posted a video to some anime transformation sequence, then proceeded to showboat more.

My alchemist buddy walks in on the scene (It is a street after all.) and greets me.

Mail sent.
What gets me is that, even when they have huge amounts of "Common sense"/"Common Courtesy"/"Don't Godmode" rules and stuff, people still completely ignore them all the time whenever they can get away with it to make their own character more badass.

Or you get the fucks who make characters who remark IC about people's characters based upon what the PLAYER thinks about those characters, and sees all IC returned fire as an attack on them as a person.

I also used to know this guy who used a huge fuckoff multi-railgun in a crowded bar, and then got pissy when everyone present started writing about the enormous collateral damage it caused, because it's a fucking MULTI-BARRELLED RAILGUN.

"Stop godmodding my bullets!"

The tears were delicious, because he was a total cunt.
A vampire-werewolf-demon who, on the odd occasions he didn't use "u" or "ur," STILL did not know the difference between "your" and "you're," with daily activities consisting of brooding, being dark and mysterious, and strangely not suffering from any side effects or weaknesses of being a vampire, a werewolf, or a demon.

His best friend, a paranormal hunter of some sort who hardly did any hunting and was more into chasing ass. Literally EVERY female character was hit on him or another one of his characters CONSTANTLY. At one point he somehow ended up dating one of the other roleplayers, and if someone got anywhere NEAR his girlfriend's characters, he flipped out.

A stoner russian who just got involved accidentally (Me), a token slut party member, and various others with no notable personality quirks.

I eventually got banned for telling the vampire-werewolf-demon-guy to fuck himself.
Why did you stick around that place? Just to hang out and RP with the crew of yours? Sounds like you have to put up with a lot of bullshit.
In a land were everyone is a mary sue, it's hilarious to walk around as humans when no-one actually dares attack you for fear of godmodding.

Not that guy, but something like that I'd bet.
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My only horror stories are stories involving me. Over the years I've freeform roleplayed since I was 11 years old (I'm nearing 24 now). I picked up online tabletop a year back but no horror stories to talk about yet, and I hope to keep it that way.

The fact that I don't recall any horror stories from freeform, despite the fact that I'd been doing it for over a decade, is a real testament to how horrible I was as a kid.

My first character was a generic vampire who I based off Angel from Buffy the Vampire Slayer. I didn't even watch the show but I saw it momentarily while flipping through channels and thought, "Yeah, cool." Whenever I'd walk into the Red Dragon Inn (AOL 56k... ;_;), I'd say something like, "anon walks in grinning," because I used to think grin meant to grimace.

Later on, I roleplayed as a saiyan kid monkey in a DBZ freeform. Equally awful.

I'd like to apologize to anyone I was roleplaying with back then, who are now probably in their thirties and forties. Sorry guys. :(
Obvious troll.

... Wait, what?
Guys... uh.

It's possible to play a non-human character in a fantasy RP without being a Mary Sue and/or godmodding fuck... right?

Am I going to have to admit that making characters based on my drawings - no matter how much they end up having cliché things like funky eyes or tails or skin colours or whatever-the-fuck - is bad and I should feel bad?

Because I've played and enjoyed characters who were wall-crawling half-demon thieves with speech quirks, but they still nearly got taken out in any one-on-one fights with normal people and tended to just run the fuck away when shit went south. Does that mitigate it at all?


Having a few points on the Mary Sue Scale does not immediately mean you count as one.
But what if I like to pretend I'm a kawaii schoolgirl while doing it?
The big question is, are you having fun?
Still am sticking around.
I joined with the intent of bringing it down.
I'm slowly succeeding. The main bad-girl lost her powers. Altair's son ran away. The GM is "board". Nero is "channeling his power through the earf clan" to open some gate or something.

Basically I get to fuck up both sides of a war soon.
That's starting to get a bit too far up that scale.
Is the character's only "flaw" being "too beautiful" or "clumsy (but in a comical way and usually only falling into the arms of whoever you want to bang this week)"?
Subterfuge always leads to disappointment in the end.
Heard a story from a friend, nothing fancy

He gets invited to a server (which is all anthro all the time) by a friend of ours. Now our friend is incapable of being creepy about that sort of stuff but the other RPers there are not so restrained. With this in mind friend one made his character and electric lizard man thing, as a bodyguard. When ever anyone tried to "pet" him or any other such creepy behavior they would get shocked.
I'm no the guy who actually posted that.
I just did it for amusement.
If I know those, suddenly a somehow even greater evil power will emerge and do... something of some kind of evil act, and then disappear. And shit will just go back to status quo so the Mary Sues can continue to sparkle their way around town threatening each other.

was it furcadia

that fucking game, man....
Hey, I remember being eleven and having fun in that game, too.

Those damn tools that bought the phoenixes and dragons and ruined everything with godmodding.
Such assholes.
>DM decides to do mystery campaign
>Have us investigate mysterious masked men who keep coming into town at night
>All attempts to investigate fail, we turn up nothing more than than "well they come through around X pm..."
>When we complain to the DM, he blames us for roleplaying it out instead of calling for gather information rolls
>He stages an encounter where one of the masked men walks into the inn we are staying at and throws the naked, unconcious bodies of two of our party onto the floor
>The masked man who did it refuses to answer any questions and leaves
>DM acts dissapointed when we don't attack him
>Later reveals the masked men are a group of high level spellcasters that are important to the plot
>Nevermind, we persist and continue to discuss plans
>He keeps interrupting us to say "Oh wow you guys are so going to die"
>Ask DM whether he is trying to railroad us because none of us find it amusing or entertaining
>He insists he has an awesome plot thought up, starts blaming us for not moving the campaign along fast enough
Funny thing is, the wall-crawling half-demon awkward coward thief from before accumulated a whole lot of swag through in-character shit. It still makes me laugh how much the other players let me get away with stealing or acquiring.

Somehow, said character ended up with piles of gems, more than 500 gold, whole suits of armour, a chest that gave them whatever they wanted to wear... need I remind you that all of that is stuff other people created and then let me steal when I tried?

Then again, having a pocket-plane stored in a hat might have been cheating a little when it came to transportation.

And then, due to a magical item that I acquired during an RP arc having to be forcibly removed, they later ended up having a fucking cyborg hand.

Like, seriously. I feel so terrible for how much cliché bullshit that character had, but I swear I didn't plan any of it, people just liked to give them shit and save them whenever they were going to die. At one point, when a golem exploded, they took a shard of metal to the gut. I was going to have them die, but like four people were like "I HEAL YOU" and they were saved.

Why do other people insist on slowly turning my characters into magic cyborgs sitting on top of a mountain of swag? I makes it hard to argue that I'm not playing a Mary Sue twat. Somebody even had a character build a house for one of my characters once. I don't even fucking know.
Yeah, that's not me.

Said character was pretty damned flawed despite the swag and ridiculous checklist of clichés. They were a coward through and through, scared shitless of fights or dying or anything like that, and would get the fuck out of there when things went anywhere approaching south. They'd leave people to die if they had to, no matter how terrible they felt for doing it. Inherently selfish and greedy, but it wasn't so much that they were a horrible person (they had flashes of genuine care for other people) but more just that they were too afraid of people to let themselves get close enough to care about them.

Not to mention the fact that they were a terrible fighter, and absolutely pissweak when it came to things like endurance. Their only real strength was being fast and sneaky, and apparently quiet and unassuming enough that people liked them and kept giving them shit or not noticing that they were only there to steal your stuff.

Fuck, I'm pleading a terrible case for this character, aren't I? I guess I just want to believe I wasn't terrible, since it was the one thing I enjoyed playing back then.
They sound pretty reasonable to me actually.
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I used to play freeform pokemon RPGs. Sometimes I was a trainer, but most of the time I was an average gardevoir shaman with no outstanding special abilities except being able to summon rain by dancing and altering perceptions on certain weak willed people by causing them to hallucinate.

Freeform RPGs are such bullshit. There's no actual structure. Everyone is a fucking Mary Sue with some sort of TRAGIC DARK PAST AND EVERYONE HATES ME! And the pokemorphs. Oh god, the pokemorphs! They were fucking everywhere, stating it as their reason for people hating them. "OH, WE'RE SO DIFFERENT, FUCKING HUMANS!" crap gets old real fast.

Human trainers were often attacked or murdered. Non-pokemorph pokemon players were consistently mocked, especially if they played a less anthropormophised version of a pokemon. And the sex. Oh god, the sex. It was like one big pile of moving flesh, basically. Those rooms if they were real must have been covered in a really thick, sticky resin that no amount of club soda could wash out of your skin.

Because I wasn't playing a special snowflake, I was basically neutered and couldn't actually affect a plot outside of fucking my way through most scenes. I basically became a manipulative whore who was ineffective outside of the bedroom; and it did nothing but cause drama.

Never fucking again. This kind of shit right here, and the stuff I've read above makes me hate furries even more.
The chatroom that got me started on "roleplaying" was a Sonic the Hedgehog based one. I cannot remember many specific details, thank you all deities in every pantheon whose spheres of influence include the creation of alcohol.
But that does sound VERY familiar.
One of the big things about Sues that makes them so annoying is that they start off with all of their bullshittery. They don't actually have to do anything to gain all of their super awesome powers or anything because it's all explained by their backstory.

By actually having to accumulate all of the overpowered things you have over time, you are automatically a better roleplayer than a large amount of the 'roleplayers' who make Sues.

It's not so much the cliche stuff that's bad, it's how it's used (or not used) that's the problem- sticking to a personality and responding to situations in an appropriate manner is a cornerstone of effective roleplaying. Build on that and you'll be better than 95% of most freeform RPers.
Yeah, I stopped playing Freeforms specifically because of the drama and the self-righteous elitism and shit like that. Unless you were a super powerful character it was near impossible to influence the plot, so I stopped trying. The last things I was doing before I faded off the forum I was on were just social RP things, which were fun but there was just too much OOC drama. Too difficult to police, as well. At the very least the board I was on was PG-13, so I only had to deal with implied sex at worst.

Except violence. Apparently it's okay to graphically eviscerate people, but touching someone's dick is evil.
God bless America.
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Oh god, don't get me started on Sonicfags. They're the worst part of the furry fandom... yes, even worse than babyfurs, otherkin, and fursuiters. Bronies start getting close to Sonicfags, but by close, I mean they're the closest... and there's still a large gap between them and sonics....


Yeah, I never understood that. It's ok to talk about smashing someone's head in, but as soon as you start talking about sex and sensuality, the hammer comes in. Even if I implied that my character was sexual (she's a shaman, of course she's sexual) but didn't directly approach it, they got insanely butthurt.

I blame autism.
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Some of you probably remember this. Some of you may have seen it before, but don't know where it came from. So I'm going to tell you all a story, about the time /tg/ went a raiding on a kiddie (In reality, 14-16 year olds) RP forum.

Our story starts with one elegan/tg/entleman posting some of the character profiles he had seen on the site, and from there, it sorta snowballed. In the end, we got four people together to launch a raid. It was a cyberpunk setting with bullshit superpowers like emotion manipulation, so we decided to roll in as techpriests (And one tech ninja.) All was going well, no obvious flags, our techpriests were doing nothing but fixing shit, and in general, having more personality than the actual "Super srs guyz" characters that these people made.

Then the DMPC stabbed the shit out of a robot. So we captured her, held her down, made her apologize to the poor machine spirit, then chucked her into a dumpster. Then one of our players took pity on her, and said she killed an AI within the robot. So there was only one logical thing to do for any loyal follower of the Credo Omnissiah. BURN. DOWN. EVERYTHING. Our four man band hotwired a pickup, broke into a music store and stole speakers and an electric guitar, and barreled down the highway to city hall while playing the Star Spangled Banner Hendrix style to purge the Abominable Intelligence, and bring down the omnissiah's wrath through orbital strikes on the city. And make all the reactors go boom at the same time.

We gave them two hours to stop us. They didn't. So the city was purged in fire and brimstone, and we all walked away smiling, as the DM and everyone else looked shocked that they had been derailed so hard. They tried to recon it, but it failed, and the RP fell apart soon afterwords.
I remember that. Good times.
Yeah, it was fun. The reactions on their faces to the fact that we all committed suicide to destroy the city was pretty priceless.
When was this? Can't seem to remember.
May I think.
Would you want to stop robo-Jimi Hendrix from sticking it to the man?
I think not.
Succubi, amirite? Can't live with 'em, can't live withou- wait, what the fuck were we talking about again?
>Then one of our players took pity on her, and said she killed an AI within the robot. So there was only one logical thing to do for any loyal follower of the Credo Omnissiah. BURN. DOWN. EVERYTHING.

How exactly is that "taking pity"? Unless that's like taking mercy like "the emperor's mercy" which really isn't mercy at all.
In the same way that fire and brimstone is sympathy for gays.
Well... we originally were going to treat her like a saint that could find the AI's so we could purge them. Unfortunately, she went off and became all emo. So we said "Fuck her" and started our own AI purge team without her. And with blackjack. And hookers.
You know that anecdotal story about the newbie GM who thought he was supposed to make the players roll for EVERY action their character made? The one who made a character roll a Dexterity check while taking a crap to avoid failure?

The one who ruled that the failed roll meant the PC blasted shit all over everything and everyone?

I was in that game.
>posts that
>doesn't post story
I am disappoint.
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Also, more gems from the site.

"This is our world and we manipulate it as we please. But there is an order.
Me- creator/ god
Randomly chosen girl- goddess
Vampires/werewolves/nekos-top class citizens
Fairies/elves/other mythical creatures- middle class citizens
Humans- lower class citizens
Even though there are different class citizens each level has its benefits from the god and/or goddess"

And the dudes signature:
"You may break my bones, but you can never break my spirit.

Lord Dracula will rise again and when he does my enemies are in trouble.

My body is of Earth, but my mind is in an undiscovered universe.

Why must I be tortured by this planet?"
As in the literary Dracula or some weird dumbass demigod thing from their "game"?
Here's a funny little anecdote:

I once ran a roleplay on a forum filled with 13 - 18 year old kids, back when I was one of those kids. It was meant to be a Diablo-esque gritty horror-fantasy with legions of undead rising up to lay waste to the countryside at the behest of some evil warlord, yadda yadda. You know, typical "band of heroes gets together to rally together and venture into the heart of darkness" sort of thing.

So I'm approving all these bios, and they're pretty reasonable. One weeaboo-ish rogue girl, but fairly muted in power. Otherwise we've got mercenaries and fallen holy-men and stuff like that - traditional low fantasy fare.

And then there was Carlos. Carlos the Summoner.

Now Carlos had a vaguely defined set of powers. He was a summoner, y'know? He summoned things. I waved it through, not catching the obvious warning flags of vaguely defined but potentially limitless cosmic power. Hey, I was young.

As soon as the character begin to talk, Carlos starts to internal monologue about the time he accidentally wiped out a village to kill off a few heretics or something. He broods and angst over his apparently godlike power in a wall of text that I must not have really read that closely - or maybe young me was just too much of a pussy to call him out on it.

The forces of darkness attack the city, cutting our meeting short. The only escape is through a secret tunnel, and we must flee. The king is too proud to leave the defences, and the city will fall at his command, but so will we if we stay. We have to press on as quickly as possible.

Suddenly, Carlos summons his infinite power to call upon an old debt with a divine being. He tells us that he has this under control, and summons an archangel to distract the armies of undead marching on the city. Then he casually walks off to the secret tunnel as if nothing happened.

During the escape, several of us are gravely wounded - except Carlos. Carlos the Summoner. He just broods and walks ahead of us. He's just too cool for us. People slowly started to drop off as Carlos began to summon legions of golems to carry us to our destination on gigantic rock chairs, and we all silently agreed, I think, that it was best to leave the quest to Carlos. The game died.

Years later, I got curious. I found the old RP, and I found Carlos. You know what I found?

His last post on that very same forum was from mere months ago, asking if anyone wanted to RP a Pokemon trainer turning into a pokemon and fucking.
Honestly, all I can remember is
1) It was using the GURPS rules, and
2) We were in the wilderness at the time said incident occurred.

I've managed to block the rest out.
I'm not sure. I'll put some screenshots someone made of some of the shit he's seen on this site.
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This is why I only do 1 on 1 RP's these days. Got a friend I play with online pretty much daily for the past 5 years. Our roleplay has grown to contain around 100 characters (about 15 major ones).

At this point it's more like taking turns writing half a page of our story.

The log is over 2000 pages now. Had to split the file because word kept crashing trying to open it.
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Next one is a two parter.
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>15000 years old
>Looks 15

Not gonna lie... I threw up a little.

>Threw up a lot really.
What does this kid have against the Inuit people?
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The world weeps that such a sue can be created - and taken seriously.

age 15000. grew up with italians. wut.
Wait how did she grow up Italian if apparently she was turned into a vampire more than ten thousand years before Italy existed.
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Couldn't bear to read fully. But...

I bet she's a time traveller, too.
>It turns into personality cults where people worship the people with the strongest personalities and opinions and form into stuffy little cliques where they think they're the best roleplayers around.
>On this strange political stage, the only thing people really care about is who is fucking who. Becoming the lover of someone with a lot of power and reputation on a website grants you a bit of that respect as well.

Change out RP for Bullshitters and Website for Campus and that sums up my college experience quite nicely.
Let's see now
>virgin goddess of the hunt and moon
>twin sis of Apollo
>uncle is Hades
No, her uncle is PLUTO who rules over Hades
>pet dog is Cerberus
I don't think so, if anything Cerberus would be the pet dog of Persephone
>Athena, goddess of smartness
Wisdom actually, and also combat (and the city of Athens because fuck Poseidon)
>Aros, the god of love
It's EROS, and it's a minor deity

Surprisingly correct, but very "I skimmed the book gaiz!"
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I wouldn't doubt it. This one is also a two parter.

Maybe a Christmas killed her parents.
>Not Artemis Fowl but the goddes of hunt and moon kind of Artemis. LOOK HER UP!

It's good that they clarified this. Who knew the ancient Greeks had their own gods?
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This sort of shit makes me lose faith in man even more than a stint in /b/ does.
See the second bit, here
I thought Artemis liked to appear as a young maiden - also, Pluto is the Roman deity who rules over Hades, their underworld.

Hades is Pluto is Hades. Their the same being, with different names.

I can't stop, Arch-Magos. Why can't I stop? Please make it stop. I beg you to make it stop.
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This is possibly one of the worst things we have made as a species.
She got the part about Hades right.
Hades is the name of both the god and the relm of the dead.
Pluto is the Roman name.
>Inuit hunter


I have no feels. I'm sort of thankful my groups are not that bad.
>Maybe a Christmas killed her parents
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Honestly, my online RP'ing experiences have been pretty enjoyable. I was the Dealer for a Wild Cards group over IRC, which was really fun, and when one of the players left, I then had the chance to DM an AD&D 2e game, which was also great. Had to leave for various reasons though, which sucked.
I'm pretty sure Pluton (yay for English transliterations) was the dude who presided over the Underworld (Hades).
And yeah, appearing as a young maiden is another thing, pretty much everyone back in the day appeared as a young maiden (aside from some oddities, like the Fates)
Pluto was the God AND the place, but originally it was just the god.

Source: actually being Greek and paying attention to the 3 years of Ancient Greek History (and also Mythology).
This thread is making me think of the character I made up over years to use as a self-insert into non-vidya media I consume like books, shows and so on.

I could speak about.. it if anyone wants to hear. I don't think I've come up with something faggier, though.
You insensetive fuck, my parents got killed by a christmas
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It gets WORSE
We're mostly talking about Freeform up in here, not online PnP.
>Has pet crow, falcon and raven.
Choose one, motherfucker!

We're talking about free form RP, playing a PnP RPG or cards online.
>Head of SCP Foundation
Freefrom RP is the true face of humanity. Sullen, unoriginal, and dumb.
No, Pluton/Pluto Was the Roman god of the Dead and ruler of the underworld, as you pointed out, named Hades.

Hades is the Greek god of the Dead and ruler of the underworld, eponymously named for it's ruler.
>sign up for irc game
>touted as 1920's and zombies
>group of 6, all fairly normal
>work for mob boss doing job in beginning of game
>standard 1920's rpg was actually really fun
>zombies show up
>here is the theme song on youtube playing from the band
>the band are the assassins from homestuck and they're helping kill zombies
>one of the PC's is now a thousand year old egyptian loli from a different game a quarter of the group played
>the mob boss has given you a monster truck fully equipped for zombie killing

people left at that point and the campaign ended that first session
Oh. M'bad.
I was trying to forget I ever made that game, you son of a bitch.
First line on Greek Wikipedia page for it
Ο Πλούτωνας (αρχαία ελληνικά: γενικά στην Ελληνική Μυθολογία σήμαινε τόσο τον κάτω κόσμο όπου μεταβαίνουν οι ψυχές μετά θάνατο όσο και την ίδια ιδεατή ανθρωπόμορφη δύναμη που κυβερνούσε αυτόν τον χώρο. Η λέξη αρχικά αναφερόταν αποκλειστικά στον θεό.

Just checked another book on it I have, Pluto was both the dude and the place.
For further proof, look at Kronus and Rea's kids. One of them was Pluto. But Hades was ALSO the name of the god, so yeah, all is correct.
I found my group from a splinter-off of a group made on /tg/. For the past four years I have played with them online and I regret nothing.
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Do you truly know what foul depths of the internet I got these from? DO YOU!

Also, the follow up to the AMERICA truck and our destruction of the city. She unfortunately deleted the thread that the original story was in, so we only have a couple of screen caps of it.
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Here's a picture of a bunny eating a banana.


I don't know. Just... I don't know. My brain couldn't deal.

What happened?
Anyone at all?
I feel some catharsis is needed

Look here:


We pretty much blew up the city. Killed everyone including ourselves. She tried to start a second one, but it failed, as /tg/ spammed her with characters.
Oh hey go ahead and post, I managed to miss your post.

Go on. It's that time. It's fucking Oprah, /tg/-style, in here.

You're in luck, because that bastard and his bunny made me start YouTubing rabbits and shit and now I HNNNNNNNNNNG-

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Go ahead. In the meantime, the screencaps of the end of the AMERICA brigade.
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My spess mehreen is a clone of the god-emperor. Also he killed Horus, but he just let the emperor take credit.
My bad, I did wonder if someone here might recognize it.

Honestly it was a really fun game until the zombies showed, then things went downhill.

H-h-here I go

Bio stuff
Bascially, he's this dimension-traveller who tours through different universes, pretty much whatever book/show I'm using. He interacts with the environment and characters in my stead, but can do little to effect the plot because it 'destabilizes' the area. He also has powers literally on what he believes and what he likes, he uses all sorts of technology that he knows shouldn't work, but does because he thinks it might be possible after all, along with general energy blasting shit. To become one, one simply has to sort of achieve CHIM.

To survive and as a source of power, he needs 'humanity', energy generated when things happen that can invoke emotions in humans, or other things. People with the same power thus tend to pose as gods or demons or otherwise when they go around farming humanity, though he doesn't care much for it and prefers being mostly a silent observer. The explanation I thought up for them not subsisting on their own humanity is that existing like this consumes more humanity than they can produce, so they have to go around seeking it out.

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My turn.
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>Be in a freeform RP community
>People are welcome to join in as they like
>Power levels are often established before hand, especially the regulars
>Play a Moderate level magic user. Not terribly powerful, but can access artifacts and other mystical things to give him an edge
>Only ever carry around a couple at a time, making me stronger than the more powerful characters only in the right conditions, or with preparation beforehand.
>One artifact is a silver band that is always kept in in hat that makes large concentrations of mana in the air unstable
>Never have to use it on regulars, because they know to be subtle with their magic and are aware of the band's existence
>Newbie comes along and my character insults her half angel/demon heritage, claiming that one of her parents was a whore
>She gets mad and starts to charge a spirit bomb
>Band in hat activates causing all the energy to break apart in every direction.
>She goes bat shit, calling me a god modder.
>Point her to a rule in all the groups RPs that basically says, pre-existing characters or characters with group given titles(have to be earned from the admins) are always more powerful than new characters unless they agree the new person has a higher powerlevel.
>So she IC turns to my characters best friend as he enters and claims I was trying to molest him so he should kill me
>Friend gropes her ass and says, "No, I'm good."
>Never see her again

Freeform is pretty fun if everyone can agree to a set of rules and power levels of characters. Also having some good friends to do it with works well too.
I've only done freeform once.

>Play as Guardsman Bruce Willis
>Play him as an Oblivion Guard, complete with scumsense and neverending clone horde backups
>Pop into someone's private house, where a half-kitsune half-vampire is having sex with a "thousand year old" twelve year old witch
>"Stop right there, criminal scum! You're wanted for pedophilia!"
>He instantly zips over to where I am, pinning me down to the ground and breaking both my arms.
>Two more Bruce Willis' come in, shouting "Stop, criminal scum!"
>Zapped out of existence
>A Bruce crawls out from the fireplace as another breaks in through a window and two more breach through the door
>Get banned

It's what I get for trying to uphold the law.

I'm annoyed I didn't get involved when I saw this actually happening. Looks great.

I love you guise ;_;
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As for his own powers, he uses it to power a robotic left eye with geenral vision augments and seres as a port for him to interface directly with computers, a robotic left arm that looks no different from a normal arm but is significantly stronger, and brain implants that allow him to control his short-term memory and emotions and so on. He can also do generally crazy shit with his reality-bending powers so long as he believes it's plausible, but relies on mind-control and space manipulation more than anything. He uses whatever weapon fits the ocassion, usually dressing himself to fit the setting of wherever he's in, but always has a spear nearby because of how useful it is and how much I like spears.

Being practically immortal means he's had plenty of time to learn science and shit, and so his base (did I mention that all dimension-travellers liek him have a pocket space that they have complete control over?) is filled with machines and a bitchin' lab and stuff, though how much of it actually works and how much of it is just his powers manifesting, he doesn't know, though he wants to learn more so he can more finely manipulate his powers rather than just hoping it works as he thinks it will. He has a huge computer system where he regularly backs up his memories to insert into clones that are released if something ever happens to him.


That latin at the top gets me everytime. I know Latin well enough to know that it is clearly google translate, with a few words not even translating.

He has little fear of his clones overtaking him because they have a MAD scenario of some sort, if one of them decides to kill and replace him they risk having another clone kill them to take their place as well since it sends a message.
The whole clone thing was also sort of tied into a plot with his identity, he uses a variety of aliases because he doesn't remember which one of them is his real anme anymore, and can't remember up to a certain point in his memory. He suspects that he's a replacement clone and/or that he for some reason wiped out his own memories, but generally doesn;t give too many fucks anymore and just continues adventuring through the multiverse with his powers

And I think that's about it. God.
It's kind of a shame it never got started again on the second day. I wasn't around for the first day and I was really looking forward to getting in on it.
Rolepages was pretty fun to fuck up, though, if a bit unorganized.

If I'd been there with you, I feel we'd be those two old beat cops sharing weird stories of the service and complaining about how them "outsiders and freaks" always get a free run of the city.
Speaking of which, didn't that turn into an all dorf's all the time thing?
>be a member of a pretty good group with amazing rps
>we get kicked out of our site because mods don't want to moderate our threads
>given crappy free php board
>eventually make our own
>become administrator
>kick ass rps are now a memory because of the years of atrophy from not being associated with the site anymore.

It was vgmusic. Now we made up our own site called rphaven, that most people associate with the .com, but it's really .net. If i were an admin for it back then, I wouldn't have named it that. I really wouldn't have
God, I just realised how I thought this up over years and years of being bored. He was worse in the beginning before I came up with all this

And a game with everyone being godlike entities might be interesting

Use to do freeform on there with a bunch of bros that did it right.
>I rush ahead, swinging my sword low sweep for X's legs
>I didn't expect Y to attack so suddenly, jumping backwards to avoid the slash as I draw my sword, stumbling back
I looked it up about a year ago and I started to cry. One of the RPs was literally
>Son of Naruto: I use my Rasengan and hit you!
>Son of Naruto 2: NO! I use my Rasengan. It's bigger and cancels out yours and hits you!
>Son of Naruto: Well that was just a shadow clone.

And fuck, the damn RP settings. Last the list was
>Naruto/Bleach Crossover
>Twilight but NOT TWILIGHT
>Naruto/Twilight crossover

Back in the day, I actually made a setting that was motherfucking Kitchen Stadium, and everyone there was competing to be top chef. It did turn into a massive food fight with lots of casualties, but still.
Yeah, we just kind of set up a fort on rolepages and spammed the shit out of them.
Then we came back as bees. There was talk about coming back AGAIN with celebrity names, I think, but that never happened.

God that was fun.
OP here. Arch magos do you remember the second board that got raided after that first one?

Can't remember the forum, but we basically jumped into this shitty freeform RP about THE DEMANZ that was 40 pages of nothing but this lass and her one friend talking constantly about their "demon forms". Que 12 or so of us orbital dropping onto the world and the next 20 pages of HOLY SHIT, SPACE MARNS.

Highlights include my grey knight shoving a power first through the lass who started the game and the other poster trying to godmode everyone to death with his super powered demon dog, before we crushed it's skull and he got upset and ran off.

Then we called for exterminatus as some fa/tg/uy was running around as a daemon prince.
Fucking beautiful.
Oh god rolepages was amazing... the great dig was my personal favourite.
Oh yeah, I do. That was fun to read.

Arch Magos? D-Did he... Ever explain this?

> fragile, walk-crawling half demon thief that became ridiculously powerful and was healed when a golem blew up. Based on creator's drawings.

... Holy shit, is that you, Brighty?
isn't that what exalted is?
As far as I know, no.
>join friends forum based personally fantasy world after much insisting on her part
>read custom lore
>one race is dragons stuck in human form, but compensate with super strength or speed
>Go super speed
>Portray self as a wise-cracking coward who runs the fuck away

Then I met the other characters, oh dear.

Self proclaimed queen of the forest elves
A dimension hopper assassin that was basically Jace mixed with Batman mixed with furry
Another dragon-kin who instead opted for the unmentioned 'Super-seduction' option

Ah, memories.

Small mercies, then.
I don't know what Exalted is
I don't come to /tg/ very often
I'm currently designing a tabletop RP in which the players take on the roles of Mary Sues in precisely this kind of environment. It is their objective to escape the horrible story they occupy either through death or obscurity despite the universe itself existing to glorify their every action.

Does anything like this exist? Would anyone play it?
>Freeform must be bad because most of the people that use it are bad
>If I don't have rules I'm going to behave like a complete retard just because I can

It's not that hard to just simply not be a complete ass, right?
Pluto is the Roman name for Hades. Hades was both the underworld and the ruler of said underworld.
I play this every time I roleplay or play any game.

I fucking love making mole hills out of mountains.
It's a game from the same guys that do World of Darkness
>World of Warcraft Prologue private RP server
>Good parts of /v/ decide to establish the Slaves of Armok guild
>Get everyone together and head out for a place to settle
>Clear out Ulda for Armok.
>Admins sweep in and cockblock us by setting a huge rock in front of the dungeon
>Everyone is doing some great RPing
>People love us but most admins consider us trolls even though everything we do is legit
>Was the human chronicler of their journeys and am quickly accepted as one of the main founders
>Something happened
>People start to leave
>Dorfs go crazy
>The leader, Urist Stonechewer disappears
>Fear the worst
>forced to leave or be sacrificed to Armok
>Watch as all our work crumbles
Forced to join up with other friends I had met in their towns
>At least one brooding mother fucker in every town

I miss you guys.
I sure hope not. I plan on making another attempt at doing a super hero /co/ freeform.
>freeform shadowrun RP
> AI Wizard with robot body
> "Robot wizards are counter to the basis of the setting"

>People love us

Were the slaves that delusional? You guys were universally hated as shit roleplayers and OOCers.
I'd recommend Amber instead. You're basically a minor god jumping from universe to universe (and that includes any setting you and your GM can imagine) fighting a war against chaos.
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The first RP I ran was pretty much me and a couple of other guys being dorks and jumping dimensions so we could do things like set Sephiroth's hair on fire and clone Samus Aran.

Then one of the dudes (who happened to be an immortal dragon vampire caveman thing for some reason, friend to the player who owned the exotic alien scientist from a race of beings who like to destroy planets and civilizations wholesale just because they don't have absolute control over what their citizens do) introduced an equally-immortal demon tiger golem thing that he's been fighting since the dawn of time...

Long story short my character (200 year old shapeshifting alien avian psychic with a Forte/Bass ripoff power-suit and master of a superconglomerate which doubles as his private army) manages to beat the evil dude up with a giant-ass energy attack which literally burns his arm off for using it.

That...was the highlight of the RP before drama and GitS ripoff mechs and the alien chick's psychotic daughter (partially my fault) decided to ruin everything.

After that I migrated over to blkdragon*inn to play with the vampires who sat by windows in broad daylight, undead necromancers with their own harems, and the golden-winged angels with perfect bodies and 14 foot wingspans...that they mentioned every time they walked in...
You know guys, as much as I admire what you have done part of me kind of feels bad about you intentionally ruining the fun of other people. I know what they were doing is terrible and that I was not there to see it all but still it feels really kind of a dick move to do this with others.
You've obviously never experienced the horrors that were put to rest there.

Because then you'd know they deserved every bit of it and more. You'd know...
I used to do freeform RP in nationstates

Holy shit that was horrible
Mary sues need to learn.
Fuck that shit. When we went over to rolepages I logged on there a few times to watch the terrible sues.

One of them introduced himself floating into the bar and had a trenchcoat black angel feathers.



Those people deserve every ounce of pain they get.
Yeah, well. I'm pretty sure everyone has been at the "I'm an edgy cool Mary Sue maker" stage at some point in their internet history (that is, if they started browsing the internet that early in their lives). And some day, the victims will hopefully look back and think "I probably deserved it"
I wish someone were kind enough to call me out on my faggotry. I didn't Mary Sue much, but I did steal a lot (though I at least went far enough to add a fresh coat of paint to it.)

I suppose I was too young and didn't have a wide enough world view to have the capacity for originality.
Well, I did make a terrible sue character once. It's a long story, but in short, some guy on the DoW2 forums came up with the idea that we should make a chapter, create lore for it and each have a character within the chapter. A bunch of ideas where thrown around, but we ended up with the Storm Ravens (or Storm Eagles, can't remember). They where a drop pod based chapter with a heavy use of stims and combat drugs. I created the Captain of the 6th Company, Scarlett. I originally concieved him and his company as a bunch of ragtag outkicks who where always sent on suicide missions and somehow always survived just fine. A mixture of humour and tragedy where used since they where effectively dead men. The other guys in the thread suddenly turned them into badass Black Company esque sociopaths, and suddenly Scarlett and his second in command (another guy's character) where 10000 years old and had fought alongside the Emperor. I guess I'm at fault for not putting a stop to the stupidity sooner.

Then some other guys who where pissed that their own chapter pitch didn't get picked wrote a long "Our chapter kills your chapter" fic and the thread got locked.

I left the forum soon after that.
I may need a priest...damn you all. I thought I had left my dark freeform sueing past behind! I must repent for the atrocities I committed in my youth.
Also, I wrote this:

Though I still feel that one had some merit.

Ah, nationstates. I was part of a group that played an alternate history freeform there back when it was on the Jolt forums. Slowly we added rules and economic simulations. And then we got kicked off the forums because apparently roleplaying alternate history on NS was against the rules. The only reason we got noticed was because we wanted to be sure that if we included national socialism in our run up to our WW2 that it would be cool.

So over the course of like, six years now we've kept playing off and on in different incarnations on our own forums. Shit's pretty cash.

Years ago on the Funorb forums I...I would rp in the freeform style. There were so many...I...I was tainted by their sueishness and began to slip. I left but no matter how many times I did I always went back. Oh God-Emperor, I can still remember my login.

Back when I was a teenager with shit taste, I used to bum around on this IRC network called Espernet. I have never seen an IRC network more packed with furries and anime fans than this place, holy fucking shit.

I'm still on that network, but my closest friends and I mainly stick to our own channels, and we never play freeform anymore. There are about 20 of us and we've effectively made our own little sterilized corner of the network, a place for sane people to congregate, to get away from the furfags and rabid anime fanatics. I run a Pathfinder game there, but we very rarely roleplay outside of that, mostly using the place to keep in contact and keep up with each others' lives, and to organize other gaming (online stuff, like TF2 or Killing Floor).

The vast majority of channels on that network were (and still are) these bugfuck crazy "anything goes" crossover channels. You'll have Dante from Devil May Cry macking on Sailor Moon, and they team up with the cast of Tenchi Muyo and Dragon Ball Z to try and stop a guy who has the Space Rune from Saga Frontier from taking over all dimensions everywhere. Oh, and everybody fucks. Aside from a couple of the more tolerable channels with actually-enforced rules, all sorts of fucked up shit happens, erotic roleplay right there in public.

One of the earlier posters in this thread mentioned something about personality cults and cliques, and that is completely 100% true, and is still happening.
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I'm the guy who originally collected the pictures Magos was posting. I still mess around the site.

I found one yesterday where a player made a thirteen year old prostitute.

The website I found this in is targeted mainly towards younger teens. I'm not sure why he hasn't been reported yet.

I can get his character sheet if you'd like, and I also have a few more stories about him to tell.
Oh shit, I remember that! I bungee jump elbow dropped people.
In another game, he played a demi-god son of Slaanesh. It was horrible.
The cult of personality and cliques thing is totally true and is still happening. The vast majority of us started doing this shit in our teen years, so we brought the highschool popularity contest mentality into our interactions over on Espernet. A few of the more persuasive (manipulative) and narcissistic people started gathering their own little cliques, wherein they would run sessions where anyone who wasn't in their clique got their character beat up, or outright excluded. Sessions were run for the sole purpose of the clique's characters learning new powers or getting new weapons, or just to show off in that way teenagers like to.

A decade later and most of us are in our mid to late 20s. A few people I know are still, to this day, bitter and traumatized about how poorly they were treated, and never quite got over it. However, as I said before, this sort of thing is still going on. Elsewhere on that network, outside of our little protective bubble of sanity surrounded by furries fucking and anime fags comparing giant swords, there are 20 and 30 somethings still doing the clique thing. It would be funny if it wasn't so pathetic.
You honestly have to ask? STORYTIEM!
Gaw's Laws. Oh man, haven't thought of Gaw's Laws of RPGing in ages.

Wait, none of you guys actually did any of this stuff in your teens right?

Brother Nerrik reporting.

Don't forget everyone going full ANGRY MEHREENS.
The thing you have to understand about being a teenager is that it is the time of your life when it is not only okay to make mistakes, but also expected. Teenagers are incomplete adults. They are literally not finished, so it's only natural that teenagers would have shit taste and say and do monumentally stupid things.

That being said, it's still okay to point and laugh at the stupid, stupid, STUPID things teenagers like and say and do. Just remember to keep it in context.

Now, when a 20 or 30 something is doing the sort of shit you'd expect from a teenager -- the shit I described, like the son of Dante and Sailor Moon summoning his Guyver armour to take on a resurrected Mecha Freeza to stop him from destroying Yggdrasil the World Tree, or waging a campaign of intentional and systematic psychological warfare with your clique on someone who doesn't like the same anime you do?

That's not okay.
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>pic related
>imageboard RP
>mod actually steps in and asks 'what the fuck?'
>waging a campaign of intentional and systematic psychological warfare with your clique on someone who doesn't like the same anime you do?

This looks so much stupider in words than I thought it would when I was typing this.
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Alright, here's part 1 of his form. It's really big but still disturbing.

A bit about the player, he's 16 and should know that this is vastly inappropriate for the site, but always has a character who's 14 or 13, curvy, and scantily clad. He also tends to godmod at least one of his characters in order to "prevent godmodding", even in games he doesn't run.

We've been trying to overthrow his games several times in the past few weeks, and the one most vivid, the one I am about to tell you, is one where I was playing a simple man. A simple man with rampant alcoholism, an executioner's axe, and a hatred of werewolves on par with /tg/'s rage towards Ward.
Oh, hello there, Nerrik, what are you doing these days?
I have access to every character I ever made on these forums... screencaps are right out, but I can copy paste easily enough
>being a teenager is that it is the time of your life when it is not only okay to make mistakes, but also expected

I've always found that extremely, extremely stupid.
>that description
>doesn't touch her collarbone and shoulders

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Jesus Christ how horrifying.
Do you remember what it was like to be a teenager? You were an idiot, I guarantee it. Don't even try to deny it. We were all idiots when we were teenagers.

Some of us never really grew out of it, unfortunately.
like me
Alright here is one of them...

Ruler Name: H.R.M. Kin Drek fon Relios
Ruler Age: 15
Ruler gender: Male
Ruler Appearance: Kin has red,white, and black fur. He has greenish grey eyes. He stands 5'7" and weighs 119lbs.(54.0Kg) He wears a finely made coat of mail, steel gauntlets, and steel plated boots. He wears leather clothing under his chainmail.
Ruler Personality: Fair and just when it comes to ruling his nation, but feircely proud of his home and will go to war in an instant if his country is threatened.
Ruler Species: Werefox
Ruler History: Kin Drek fon Relios was

24-Jan-2010 22:35:44
Last edited on 24-Jan-2010 22:36:37 by Fox Archer66
born to Lag fon Relios and Iona Selim Relios in the year 357, Hollin reckoning. Kin rose to power one week before his fifteenth birthday after his brother assassinated both of their parents, so Kin is still new to running a nation.
Other: Kin is an very involved leader. He personally leads the Hollin 1st legion, 3rd cohort, vangaurd cavalry unit into battle.
I hope to never see any of my retarded characters from my younger years in this thread.

And on the topic of freeform;

I was part of a chatroom Bleach RP. There were only two other people who were actually good.

I met them both there, and someone else introduced me to this. She was a textbook example of GRIMDARK and SRS.

I did enjoy the characters I made for the setting though, even though I eventually got banned for 'creative' use of my power.

Please don't hate me, fa/tg/uys.
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why hasn't anyone made pedobear yet? at least for this mary sue?
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Pic 2/2

I should mention right now, this is less me doing something awesome (but I had some shit planned out), and more the creepy guy being a shitty DM and slowly killing his own game.

Now, the game I had the alcoholic, John, in, was run by the creepy ass with a budding lolita complex (if I haven't mentioned, his screen name is Dimentio). Dimentio's premise was that of a clan of werewolves and animagi, and, fortunately for us, various hunters.

So, I made John, basic backstory was that his family was killed by werewolves and so on, so he hunts them with an executioner's axe, a bowie knife, and flintlock pistols.

Dimentio made for his DMPC a werewolf, but not just any werewolf. He was a "natural lycanthrope", basically a super werewolf who could airbend, firebend, and had black magic which let him do an ill defined "number of things". He was also fifty and had a harem.

My partner in crime, a friend from /tg/, had a similar backstory to mine, but where I was based roughly on a classic monster hunter, she had a little red riding hood based character named Victoria. Now, Victoria had a family member who was thought to be dead, but hinted to be alive, and would be another character the player had made, a honey badger lycan we used for laughs but also serious roleplay potential.

Of course, Dimentio didn't get the hint as to who the sister was.....
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Yes, yes I do. I was concerned with getting good grades and impressing my elders while preparing for my future.
Working, beginning enlistment, bumming around on /tg/, starting an IG army. Quite a lot going on actually.
>11 years old
>presumably sorta-modern setting
>couldn't find her way home
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I like your glasses
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>In a forum for children

Anyway, continue Shadeslayer
We quite miss you in the monks roleplay, but I can understand if you have become too busy to participate.

A fine day to you, anyway.
Indeed, even when everything quiets down I think I'd be too far behind to really come back.
>Crtl+F HellMOO

Why hasn't this been mentioned yet? It's like Fallout meets FATAL.
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Cue Dimentio's secondary character Elika, a fox lycanthrope. She was 14, and slightly less scantily clad than the piece of work in my last 2 posts. We agreed to her being Victoria's sister for Emprah knows what reason, roleplaying potential, really. We wanted to actually play a game while doing this. Anyways, reading the backstory, she was Dimentio's favorite out of all his concubines, mostly there to stroke his ego/genitalia. Now, if you pick up the hints (I can fetch this form too, if you'd like, but it'll probably be a 2 parter), she was raped until the Stockholme syndrome kicked in. You thought John had a bad past? Victoria's little sister was raped and made a pervert's favorite whore.

We were assmad, and with a few other KW players in the clan's team, we were ready and had a long game planned out to, with only our two hunters, kill the clan, brood a little, and even had the end planned out.
You can always come back, in fact I would already have a possibility with which you can be fully reintegrated back into the RP.

But I see that you don't have any time, but you can drop by whenever you wish in the suptg chat #beegeneral, same as always
Ah geeze... I started freeform when I was about 13 for the express purpose of trolling the shit out of twilight RPs.

My first character was some asshole in a top hat and cloak that got pissed off at some werewolves for ruining his picnic in the park. He had silver stake-firing chaingun hidden under his cloak and took colloidal silver to make his blood poisonous to them.

Anyway I eventually started seriously RPing with them. I ran a pretty decent game which was supposed to be a subversion of the typical "School 4 Magic Kidz!" by having the facility more akin to a prison and brainwashing center. My most successful character so far has been something like a Monk that took a few levels in Cleric with the Attitude of a Paladin. Hit it off with another character's Elven Empress character and they drank tea and kicked ass together.

>when I was about 13

Oh you.
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>fox lycanthrope
>raped until the Stockholme syndrome kicked in
here have a cute wabbit, because i feel so damn sorry for the team
All of a sudden; the last RPs I partook in don't seem as bad as this.

And they were Bleach freeforms.

My god the horror stories I have from Barton Town. The one that stuck in my mind the best (or worst I guess) is the tale of Malice Nightshade. She was the daughter of the Czar of Russia who was adopted by a clan of ninjas that also happen to be the assassins that killed her parents (hence why there're no more Czars amirite?). She was trained by them and then brainwashed by a witch, but evenually she broke free and killed the witch who cursed her with her dying breath to be emo forever or some shit. After that she moved to Michigan because that's where the player happened to live. Over the course of the RP she became a vampire (of course) and disappeared for about an hour in game (a few days real time) to "become stronger".

Barton Town is the bed of my nightmares and a constant source of shame that I was an active and proud member in my youth.
>My first character was some asshole in a top hat and cloak that got pissed off at some werewolves for ruining his picnic in the park. He had silver stake-firing chaingun hidden under his cloak and took colloidal silver to make his blood poisonous to them.

That's pretty cool
My first character was some asshole in a top hat and cloak that got pissed off at some werewolves for ruining his picnic in the park. He had silver stake-firing chaingun hidden under his cloak and took colloidal silver to make his blood poisonous to them.

Holy fuck, that is AWESOME!
At the risk of sounding like a samefag; that actually sounds pretty cool.
It really does. Over the top yes, but cool.
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So, the game starts and John enters a tavern/inn, and immediately orders their strongest booze. Things are going to plan, then almost every Lycan save Dimentio himself is also in the exact same tavern.

So, we were panicking a little OOC, because John was burly, but these guys had near superpowers and we needed a sneak attack to get the upper hand. So after some chat with my /tg/ friend IC, and some very high risk chat with a second natural (naturals, remember, are stronger than normal ones. This was basically Dimentio's second in command.), we're both in adjacent bedrooms upstairs.

Then Dimentio finally made his first post. Like most people, he wanted it to say something about his character up front. Mine said "I am a manic depressive alcoholic". Dimentio's said "I survived six silver bullets to the chest and also I'm a little horny. Being me a little foxgirl."

Silver was still a weakness here, and he survived six silver bullets to the chest.

Then after he got an oil massage from Elika we decided to just go all out and attack his castle, investigating the howl he made at the beginning of his first post.

Then he summoned all the lycans (something like 200, never stated explicitly), as we were headed there.

I'm sure it would have been, had the thread progressed beyond the second page. I've done all of this on the same site, which is for forum-based play-by-post roleplay.

For anything to live longer than two weeks is remarkable, which is why I'm kind of amazed by all of the stories here. I wish I could be in a game that successful.

A game I'm currently in that I have high hopes for involves me being a C'tan expy that has no idea what he is, because he is an infant among his kind. He allows himself to be incarcerated by an SCP-like facility because he thinks they're very nice people, but is kind of incorporeal and they can do very little to actually contain him. He has yet to experience his first "feeding", whereupon all hell is sure to break loose.
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Shit's gonna go down.
I'm part of a freeform fantasy rp right now, but nothing's gotten out of control because everyone is on the same page and coordinates things through the irc and there's only about nine of us anyway, so it's gone really well.

I noticed really quickly how the players seemed a bit too occupied on discussing relationships and joking about "shipping" characters in the chat but I've actually been really impressed with how well they all play their interactions with one another and it's all been really fun.

The players are all really good at making sure everyone does have an equal role in the plot and are really organized and timely with turns during larger story-centric scenes.

In fact, it's probably because of how small and tight-knit the group is that's made it so enjoyable. Everyone's drawing art of the characters and scenes and one of the players has even written up a couple of short "alternative universe" stories.

And then I realized I'm the only male rper in the group

And also I'm the only member of the group that wasn't recruited over tumblr.

I fear for the worst but its too fun right now. I'm enjoying this far too much to leave even though in my heart of hearts I know this can only end terribly.

Help me.
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Shitty freeform combat ensues. We kill a random NPC werewolf just because, and get to the castle. John basically shouts "Hey asshole! Fuck you!" kids edition because the site had a filter. I did throw my axe at him, though.

Anyways, by now we had noticed something important, that led to the game's steady demise: Dimentio is rarely on. In a game he ran, he averaged one post per day, which made fighting him, something that should normally be fast paced and fun, the slowest fucking chore in the world.

Secondly, he was telling other players how they should react after they post. So he ignores my axe throw and assumes I still have it, then he pins me with said axe, but he also adds that I need to get him off or my axe will break. The axe I just threw, that is. Point being, he was railroading individual actions.
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Shit man.
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the fuck?....

Where is that pic from?
Oh god, that sounds horrible.

>mfw reading this reminded me of the Bionicle RPG I partook in on BZpower.

Oh god, I will always cringe when I think back to it.

I miss Cohdox and that other fellow.
Prequel Adventure. MSPA-style TES Oblivion fan-webcomic.
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Now, what, in my opinion, really killed the game was the OOC announcements he kept making, stuff like "this is my plan as DM, this town you have no attachment to is getting burned."

Then he announced, for reasons not even Tzeentch can fathom, "Shadeslayer, I am making you the protagonist."


After that post, everyone save Dimentio, me, and Victoria's player left without speaking. Me and Victoria only stayed because we wanted to end this at some point, preferably with gunpowder. So after a five post, 4 day OOC battle, it ends with Dimentio biting and infecting John.
What the fucking shit?
That's not even RPing anymore, that's just forcing players to act out your own fanfic.
Transylvania is her hometown.... and she's italian.
10/10 would publish
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no comment.... other than asking for a nuclear sized explosion
I feel sorry for you man.
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More to come, bitches. Don't worry though, we're almost at the end.
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>that feel when your fictional character's sister was raped into a willing sex-slave by an Unholy monster paedophile.
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Ahahaha, is that what you where doing whenever you went quiet on #beegeneral?

Good god.
That comic makes no sense.
>IQ 220
bullshit, that puts him over Einstein, Da Vinci, and Steven Hawking.
In the source, it's right after Mustang (the guy who is crying) attended his best friend's funeral.

There's more nuances and such to it, but that's the gist.
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Now, I had actually counted on getting infected. From a purely dramatic standpoint, a man who hates werewolves going on a final mission to kill a castle full would have been fun as hell to play. We even figured some posts would be pumping John's veins with silver to delay the turning, and after a few weeks IC hit endgame, with Victoria euthanizing John, it would be pretty damn cool.

So, I made a post, John's bleeding heavily, and tries to off himself but his gun's empty. We planned in an IRC that Victoria would almost shoot him, then we team up for an adventure.

Before that post though, Dimentio introduced another character out of the blue. An Italian, trenchcoat wearing (all his characters have trenchcoats for some reason) man with a sword, working for the Vatican who conscript most hunters, including our Victoria. He loudly announced that I'd turn in three days, but fortunately Vatican City was 3 days away and they'd cure me free of charge!
>... OH, NO.

I think this comic is backwards,
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i am sighing very hard at the stupidity that this Dimentio is churning out
It's from a manga. Read it from right to left.
that actually sounds like a half way decent set up for a 40k RP.
Have you never read a mango before.

The panels and bubbles go right to left.
I kinda want to join one of these games just to fuck around as Botanlich.

A kind and old lich (obviously insane) that loves growing plants above all other. What started as a curious hobby turned into a full time obsession over thousands of years locked up in an indoor garden at the top of his keep of doom.
His reasons for being on this quest is that he was chased from his keep by a party of adventurers.
They had been hired by a king who was jealous of the lovely gardens surrounding his keep (although that is not the story he told, no, he said he was an evil lich, and who doubts that a lich is evil?)
After spending so much time trying to get stuff to grow, he absolutely abhorrs the thought of ending (plant)life, and does absolutely everything he can to make things pretty.

His trick is in the fertilizer
I think my brain might need some bleach when this is all over.
Ohh right, and he dresses in a frilly garden dress and has one of those weird headdress' old women used to wear back in the days.
like this?

Yes, exactly like that
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And that, comrades, brings us to today. We just got to the place, they're currently giving John the cure that makes no sense from a mechanical or dramatic viewpoint, and Victoria got an audience with the freakin' Pope for no reason.

I really want to say that this ended with me lopping off Dimentio's head, putting Elika out of her misery, and reducing the castle to dust.

Unfortunately, Dimentio himself seems to have abandoned this game for others. He hasn't posted in 3 days, but has posted quite often in other games, including the one with the child prostitute.

So, for now at least, that's it. We're still on the site, waiting for a chance to fuck him up IC, and just messing around on random games.

If you guys want, I can tell you more stories of a game I run on the same site. It's much longer, and has nothing on the scale of Dimentio thanks to me DMing, but is still a long, hilarious tale about movie and /tg/ references, a maid, and motherfucking Krist.
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The Aether is a universe of effectively limitless energy, discovered by the Yamatai Star Empire in YE 20. Since then, aether has become the cornerstone of the SARPiverse. As technology grew, aether-powered generators became the primary power source of faster-than-light starships of all major nations, and then in increasingly smaller applications.

Aether Generators

Think of aether devices as faucets that pierce the dimensional branes and deliver energy on tap. You can get as much energy as you ask for, up until the point your device can't take anymore. The smallest aether generators are about the size of a lunchbox. The equipment used determines the power and efficiency that a device can harness that power.

Aether Bombs

With a bomb, one opens a bigger channel than a device could possibly handle, causing a brief but devastating dump of energy into regular space-time. Aether grenades exist, but are fairly rare. Much more common are starship-fired aether torpedoes, such as the AS-7.

Aether Engines

Aether can also be drawn and expelled out of a ship to provide propulsion, such as with Turbo Aether Plasma engines.
This the Knights Academy one? Do tell.
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Nekovalkyrja (pronounced “Nay-ko-wul-ku-ree”) are the cat-eared clone soldiers of the Yamatai Star Empire.


Nekos are primarily soldiers of the Star Army of Yamatai.
Nekos are born fully adult and are always female.
Nekos have catlike ears, which may or may not be covered in fur.
Nekos have brains with computer-like capabilities such as wireless communication and software downloads.
Nekos can fly and hover around.
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The Mindy's warm insides are composed of muscular flesh that is soft, slimy, stretchy, and wrinkly. The organic components provide shock absorption as well as augmented strength to the wearer. The flesh includes a sophisticated Hemosynthetic (blood-based femtomachine) system that can repair damage to the Mindy's interior. The interior is shielded from heat and radiation, to protect the wearer from the rigors of space travel and atmospheric reentry. Operation of the Mindy can be done through SPINE (for NH-29 models) or the headset system in the helmet (for Yamataians).

Life Support

The fleshy core of the Mindy houses the life support systems, which include the hemosynthetics system, a rebreather system, an oxygen supply, and a nutrient-enriched (sterile) water supply. Nekovalkyrja and Yamataian pilots receive oxygen and nutrients through their hemosynthetic umbilical port; oxygen can also be pushed through the skin. The Mindy can support its wearer for up to 15 days before replenishment is needed, or up to 10 years in stasis. If needed, the Mindy can filter outside air to replenish its supply (not usually done until absolutely necessary, though). The Mindy's interior includes a catheter organ that wriggles its way into the wearer's urethra and bladder, keeping the pilots from having to exit the suit to urinate. The interior flesh also will massage the wearer's body from time to time to encourage blood flow and provide increased comfort.
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Yeah, it's knights academy. I'm going to take a 10 minute break to get some food and stuff, and then I'll start typing up some stuff for you guys. Keep the thread alive for me in the meantime.
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>That horrible feeling when you remember using that picture with different colors for a character way back.

I...I can't...there are no words.
We're actually reaching autosage, but OK.

This archived yet?
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Ketsurui Hanako is a Nekovalkyrja serving in the Star Army of Yamatai. She is captain (and cynosure) of the YSS Eucharis and the protégé of Ketsurui Yui. Hanako is both a Player Character and Non-Player Character in that she is role-played in both roles by Game Master Wes. She is known for her caring, tolerance, and intimacy, but also for being passionately opinionated and somewhat reckless and impatient in combat.

Hanako's Personality

Hanako is a well-liked and well-known person among the Yamataian nobility; She was former Empress Yui's favorite servant and was loved like a daughter by the Emperor Ketsurui Uesu and late Empress Ketsurui Ayame. Thrust into captaining a ship by her family connections, Hanako has adapted well in taking the role of a leader. She is fair and loyal, and generally does a good job of following both the regulations and the missions she is assigned. She stays in the Star Army to protect her people from harm.

Pleasing others is a big part of Hanako's life; she derives her greatest pleasure out of being around happy, loving people who enjoy her presence. Hanako is generous, thoughtful, and caring. Hanako is also somewhat submissive and masochistic; she sees tolerance, endurance, and forgiveness as great virtues. Hanako also has motherly, sensual, and cute qualities to her. She enjoys joking, playful conversation, and touching and kissing the people who interact well with her. Most of Hanako's sexual desires, however, are self-satisfied in private.
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Hanako is opinionated, but never closed to new ideas. Some of her political beliefs are inherited from Ketsurui Yui; She agrees that Nekovalkyrja are a species that are superior (as a whole) to humans, but she sees humans as people and enjoys them.

Hanako has developed a reputation for being reckless in combat, at the cost of her starship. She is also an avid collector of militaria.

Likes and Dislikes


Nice clothing, fur, wine, rum, croissants, rice (white or fried), dark chocolate, cooking, physical contact, Music (especially trance, lounge, and soundtrack), pistols, starships, privacy, collecting souvenirs.


Beer, disgusting foods, unwelcome attempts at taking advantage of her. Hanako also strongly dislikes the Neo Mishhuvurthyar and the Lorath.


Hanako's favorite colors are black, white, gold, blue, and red. She likes stretchy fabrics (stockings and form-fitting clothing), frilly socks, dresses, and skirts. Hanako dislikes pants (other than for field use) and jeans.


“How colorful do you feel?”
“In Yamatai, tight is right!”
“You can swim farther when you go with the current.”
“Simple love and kindness is more treasure than a million swords.”
“Happiness is a fast starship and a face buried in your [CENSORED]”

>This is the last of my posts regarding this site. I do hope I've piqued your curiosity about how deep it goes. I will point out for future content seekers that the main antagonists of the setting are tentacle beings.
>Catgirls and tentacle monsters. In a supposedly serious sci-fi setting.
Well it depends, as long as you aren't a "OMG YOU CAN'T KEEL ME I'M 2 BOWERFUL 4" U rper you are okay in my books.

Like we had this one guy a while back who decided to be a Balrog in a LOtR, sounds okay right? Something that a decent person could play, dealing with that much power if they did so realistically. Excerpt this guy was the "king leader demigod" of all Balrogs. As you can imagine, he was awful.

He was obviously kicked out of the group quite quickly.
If we're hitting autosage, then could someone please make a new thread?
>Runescape Tavern RP a while ago
>In falador, giant white walled city policed by white knights.
>RP Elves trying to steal magical artifacts from the city
>disguised as a rogue, I am actually a White Knight Justicar
>Intercept theft, block their magical energies and tell them the white castle walls and knights guarding the gates will not allow them to leave.
>ignore me, tell me they have elven archers in the trees
>there are no trees.

I just said fuck it and left.
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words fail me
The fuck
Here's the link. >>20266015
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I didn't play it for long enough.

I was a thirteen year old MtF transexual that made a living as a prostitute and a pornstar that killed babies, crackheads and the elderly in her spare time. I described her as "A freckle faced girl with murder in her eyes. She looks suprised."

Also, this is a thread about bad freeform. HellMOO has actual mechanics and quests that revolve around rape, murderand similar acts. Despite (or maybe because) of this, everyone that plays is laid back and friendly, even to newbies (Goonshit not withstanding).

I was only ever griefed once (a vampire and her two suck-ups) and due to the fact that there is almost a 1:1 admin to player ratio, it was promptly dealt with.

Does anybody else have any tales of their time in HellMOO? And bonus points if you can guess what my characters description referenced.
I feel your pain. My current favourite character of mine is a knowledge devil turned planeswalker from a corner of hell I invented. It doesn't matter that I love the idea or that I feel like I wrote it well or that most of my friends seem to like it, every time I write that out I want to punch myself.

He's a lot of fun, though. Right now he's running around trying to trick a bunch of nazis into committing sins that will put their souls in his control when they die, and he's making a deal with a witch to help him turn an enemy of his into his slave.
I actually have only played (except for a couple of times) online. I'm actually in three (four if we count the one on hold) games my group runs (I think overall there are 5-10 though) and I have a lot of fun. We're pretty diverse both racially and in terms of taste, so we end up trying a lot of different systems. I could tell you about some great little moments we've had, but this is, of course, a horror story thread, so I'll focus on that.

A little more background is needed though. We all know each other from a different board and regularly talk to each other in group conversations on Skype. Not all of us in the group are into role playing games, but every so often someone who isn't into it will try it out, since the majority of us are, and we spend a lot of time talking about the games we're in together, systems, etc. There's this one guy, who we'll call him Doug (though that isn't his name), who is, over all, a really nice guy, if a bit obsessive over the things he likes. We're also pretty sure he has Munchausen syndrome, or something, because he keeps telling us all these really ridiculous, impossible, things that happen to him, but it doesn't hurt anyone, and he's not a dick about it, so we leave it be. Doug wanted to try out roleplaying around the time we were all first trying out Savage Worlds. The game we were playing was a homebrew setting one of us came up with (Slasher Monster Hunter society, basically), and we all said sure. Why not? What could possibly go wrong?

I can sum up what went wrong in two words: Prehensile Anus.

See, no one expected Doug to do what he did. He's a great guy, a regular paragon of virtue (save for the habitual lying) and niceness. He made his character a guy who had a long, prehensile, anus, so he could shit on everything and that's exactly what he did.

The tone of the game wasn't all that serious, but it wasn't quite a "Fuck around and who cares?" sort of game either. Throughout the session he shit on everything and everyone. He hopped around and rubbed his anus on everything. He even shit on the other PC's (myself included). Once he started shitting on us, our friend running the game had one of the other Slasher High Society guys knock him out so he could finish actually getting past the introduction.

Our characters have to pass an initiation to get into the society, so they bring us to some underground docks with a boat. The quest giver explains that the waters are infested with Sharkmen, and we have to kill one each to be accepted. We shove off in the boat, Doug's character wakes up, and immediately shits in someone's here. Then a sharkman jumps out and eats him. We continued on the rest of the session like his character was never there.

The other story i have is much more mild.

Basically, same friend was GMing a Deadlands game and it didn't go over that well. We let Doug try again, and he promised to not pull what he did last time. We were told to make Human characters who were nothing but human and just human (It was a point the GM stressed). I made a mad scientist, another friend made this cool cowboy mercenary, and Doug made a flaming skeleton. There was someone else as well, but they wandered off in the beginning and never came back, so they're not important. Doug didn't pull any crazy hijinks with his character, he just made a flaming skeleton man who was rather polite. He said things along the line of "Oh you know, I'm cursed to be on fire all the time, and it's terribly painful all the time, but I won't be a bother to anyone" in that Canadian way of his. The game ended with magical rain that freed his character from his curse (So he became a regular, dead, skeleton because the GM was pissed), and we never continued that campaign.

Doug feels terrible about both incidents and has never tried to play with us again, as he feels guilty about fucking around so much, despite us trying to get him to try again, and generally not caring about the incidents, as they were funny in hindsight.

The only other story I can think of would just be we used to have this one guy in the group who was the worst kind of Minmaxer ever. Every character he made broke the system and he generally made playing not fun. He eventually left the group because he felt he was getting too attached or something. Dude was a bit odd.
Future-Tech Nation-Stater here.
Was it Modern-Tech? I bet it was Modern-Tech. Those guys are clowns the majority of the time.

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