WE ARE BUTLER, 100% PURE DAPPER AND SWAG.From days of long ago, from unchartered regions of the multiverse, comes a legend.The legend of Swagtron:Seducer of the Multiverse!A mighty butler, loved by girls, feared by evil.>ARCHIVES HEREhttp://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive.html?tags=Mahou%20Shounen%20Quest>archive.foolz HEREhttp://archive.foolz.us/tg/search/subject/mahou%20shounen/order/asc/-=-=-=-=-=-=-LAST TIME=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-The two teams rematerialize in the Gym.You see two other girls on Yuki's team, one of which you recognize as that girl with the large robotic arms you fought in that other exercise with the basics that you participated in.The other, a girl with black hair and an oddly chipped katana in her hands."Okay kiddies, for the final match we're having Basics team-C against Advanced team-A.. You'll again be given thirty minutes to prepare for the next match." the Dude says from behind the table he and Mike were sitting at."We'll be adding some extra 'features' in the next round. So you guys best be prepared for anything." Mike adds."mmmpgh mmmpgh mmmpg." Erica says around your arm."Errr... I didnt quite catch that." you tell her.'I said, I don't like that sound of that' She mentillates.YOU HAVE 30mins TO PREPARE.WAT DO?>Enough to power a fleet of deathstars
Make barrels of molotov and store it in Kraus. Pull a bombing run on the enemy team like we did in that scenario.
>>19614246Go get the land raideralso fuck yeah!
>>19614246About goddamn time. I've got so much butthurt and neckbeard tears that I've been saving up for you, LG. Let's do this.
>>19614246Let's head down to the shop and pick out a few items.A staff of negation would do wonders in this fight.
>>19614257especially important given the summoners. The ability to destroy an army might be useful. It has been an hour since we last used the clone right?
>>19614246Get our FUCKING TANK.
>>19614259Seconding Fritz's idea. Tanks are Good.
Okay, I like the idea of getting our tank, but how do we get Jack in here to drive it for us?Or will Jakob be able to drive?
also make sure to bring our krieger.
My thought is that a Staff of Negation are especially effective against summoned creatures.It should give us a major advantage, if we can find one.
this quest is badand you are all niggers for not saging it with every post.
How do we defend against a meteor?
>>19614417We go all superman on it.
rolled 9 = 9THINGS THAT AREN'T THIS(MSQ) WILL HAVE TO BE PUT ON HOLD, FOR THIS(MSQ) HAS ARRIVED!And yeah, lets get our tank on.
>>19614442So your suggesting we blow it up?
>>19614417We take out the Hidamaris as fast as we can, before they have a chance to draw a meteor.Same with Yuki.Leave the colorful birds for last.
>>19614477More like meet it head on and push it somewhere else.
>>19614524Of course we're going to try to take down the summoners but what I meant was>What should we do if they manage to summon a meteor?
>>19614524We've still got invisibility and Bunny Mode, so while the rest of the team distracts them, we can go in for an assassination run.I think we should also take this opportunity to use our clone.We can either use him to help us take out the summoners faster, or use him as part of the distraction, so that the rookies don't realize we're not with our team.
>>19614589We do our damnedest to stop them from doing it in the first place.
>>19614594we can make them think we are in the land raider.
>>19614533>More like meet it head on and push it somewhere else.How about give a nudge in the enemy's direction.
Thing I'm worried about is this.If we use our molotov in the battle, it's gone.What happens if our tank gets smashed?
>>19614620That's what i was implying yes.
>>19614645Are we going to use a tea laser for that?
>>19614677>>19614677ope our pure manly strength and balls of steel.
Hey LG, if the Landraider gets wrecked in the sim, will it get wrecked for real? Because we seem to lose the potions for real when we use them.
>Get the tank"Hey, I'm popping back home for some stuff. Do you need me to get you anything?" You ask the girl slobbering on your coat."mmmppghmpgh" she answers as she shakes her head."Well, okay. I'll be right back." In the bottle, you quickly make your way down the beach, to Jack's encampment.There, you find Jack digging ditches and setting up more rows of concertina wire."Hey Jack." This greeting is met with a stiff salute."I'm gonna need the Landraider today, you as well of course."Jack nods. You take out one of those capsule corp patches you got at the RCS and slap it onto the tank's armor.After pressing a button on it, a puff of smoke engulfs the tank and a small pill appears in your hand.Jack shoulders his rifle, salutes again and waits for your next orders.----------------------------------------------------Outside, back at the gym, you walk into the doors with Jack marching behind you.At their table, Mike and the Dude have been joined by the Director to observe the final round.The Twins and Hina get off the bleachers and meet you on the floor."So Jack's here to watch?" Hinagiku asks"Err no, I need a driver for the tank.""..I don't think that's allowed." Ursula tells you"Yep." Her twin nods sagely beside her[ ]I see[ ]Wat[ ]ask Mike
>>19614743[x]ask Mike"We won't know it's not allowed until we ask."And if Jack can't do it, have them give Jakob a quick crash-course in Landraider operation.
[ ]Tell Mike we're taking jack.
>>19614810we have the tank now....time to wryyyyyyyyy
>>19614838That would require a road-roller.
>>19614843But don't have one of those...I'm sure the tank will work just fine
[ x ] It is better to ask forgiveness than permission.
>>19614953not if it disqualifies us.
>>19614743"I'm gonna ask Mike." you tell them."We'll come with." They tell you.You approach the instructor's table with your entourage in tow, Mike and the Dude watch as you do."Hey Mike, I was wondering. Can I bring Jack here with me into the simulation?""He's not a familiar right?" Mike asks"Err no.""Not a projection as well." The dude says "yeah, no.""Well, sorry kid, but you can't bring him in.""You're only allowed to bring equipment you can carry on you, or a construct made of majaik. Unless you can fit him into one of your pockets, he'll have to stay here.""I see... Thank you for your time."WAT DO?[ ]Try and find a way to bring Jack.[ ] learn how to drive the tank[ ]other?*add a roll*
>>19615006Kraus's storage subroutine?
>>19615006[x] Get Jack to teach Jakob.
>>19615006seamstress up a pair of pants with a huge pocket. put jack in it.
rolled 63 = 63>>19615006[x]otherHave Jack teach Jakob, in his Laplace Mode, how to drive the Landraider.
>>19615022Can't store living things.
rolled 16 = 16>>19615032this, except have him teach Lo instead.
rolled 34 = 34>>19615006[ ]Try and find a way to bring Jack.Make giant pocket or put him into a bag of holding (we have one right?)
rolled 88 = 88learn the FUCK outta that tank.
>>19615006What if we put one of the Portkey Stamps in out pocket, and give jack the corrisponding one, allowing him to pop out of our pocket, would that work?
rolled 86 = 86>>19615069This.
>>19615069Shit, son, that is fucking smart.
rolled 13 = 13>>19615006[x] learn how to drive the tankBecause we need to learn some time.
We need a pokeball from gullivers that is a trench system or fortifications so that we can summon and store jack
>>19615283But Jack is a person, not a program. I don't think that's a good idea.
>learn"Well, Jack. Since it seems you can't accompany me into the mission, I'm gonna need you to give me and J a crashcourse on how to operate the Landraider." You say as you walk out of the gym.Jack nods curtly.You bring out J and let him activate his humanoid form, you also pull the tank's capsule out of your pocket and bring it out in full size.Jack salutes you and opens the hatch for J and yourself.Jack begins pointing at stuff, inside the vehicle and pantomiming what they did."hmnnn... This isn't working." you say as you try and learn from Jack's display.WAT DO?
>>19615283And this demonstrates just how cruel pokemon trainers are.
>>19615299How much time do we have left. If we're quick, we could still run down to the shop quick.
>>19615299"Could you take the mask off, the whole hand wavey thing just don't cut it."
>>19615299try mentilating Jack?Ask Kraus if he knows how to drive a landraider, or if he can do something matrix style to give J the knowhow to do so.
>>19615299Have Kraus materialize a whiteboard so that Jack can write the instructions.Otherwise, "Jack, I need you to speak to us so that we can understand what you're trying to teach."
>>19615322THIS.Give him permission to speak freely
rolled 24 = 24masturbate furiously into your own mouth
>>19615296Anything from gullivers is an actual house so as long as we could carry his dwelling and therefore him we could do it according to the rules that were laid out>>19615299Soldier. Remove your mask and permission to speak freely
>>19615343While I'm sure that Erica and Ursula would love to see us do that with our clone, probably with the two of us dressed up in short skirts and H1 with bunny ears and H2 with cat ears, this is neither the time or the place. And we can only use the Clone subroutine once an hour, and we need it for this fight.
>>19615343Impossible. The MC is Japanese so he couldn't reach that
>>19615369The latter part of this, I think.
Also, we should tell Jack to observe the battle closely. S/He shoul know as much about the sort of battles we'll fight as possible.
As the three of you stood there in cramped confines of the landraider, jack still miming how to operate the thing, you can't help but think that this is not working."Err... Jack. Maybe you can take that gasmask off and speak? We can't really learn anything by your hand movements."Jack looks at you, head tilted, your reflection in the lenses of the mask."...""...""...Soldier, I order you to take off that gasmask. Permission to speak freely, granted." You tell him as you finally remember that Sousuke once said that Jack needs absolute orders.Jack salutes you and reaches up for the clasp on the mask's strapsROLLEM**
rolled 4 = 4>>19615595Be a babe, please.
rolled 7 = 7>>19615595
rolled 45 = 45>>19615595Either way we've accomplished something here.>1 = Another mask.
rolled 94 = 94>>19615595hot girl, hot girl, hot girl!
rolled 32 = 32>>19615595
rolled 11 = 11>>19615595Round and round they go where they stop... let's find out.
rolled 62 = 62>>19615595Another Mask, Another Mask, Another Mask.
rolled 46 = 46Hot chickSamus?
>>19615613I think we're good.
>>19615613Looking good so far...
>>19615613welp there ya go
rolled 79 = 79>>19615595Rolling for nested masks.
rolled 56 = 56Come on ANOTHER MASK!
rolled 18 = 18Seriously don't do the nested mask loop, it's too obvious.
rolled 32 = 32>>19615630I'll second a young-ish, armorless Samus.
rolled 6 = 6>>19615595>These rolls
rolled 22 = 22>>19615595Jack confirmed for disfigured older man. Way to go /tg/dice
rolled 93 = 93Oh, by the way guys. I forgot to tell you, but I had to suck all of MSQ's luck so we could beat Tassadar's fleet in Zerg Quest. So that's why you guys are all rolling shit. Thanks, Though!
rolled 4 = 4>>19615700Eh, we're fine. No 1s yet.
>>19615700Hey it came back.
rolled 64 = 64Right, I'm back, whaddi miss?
Would you all stop rolling?
rolled 10 = 10>>19615595
rolled 23 = 23*Thinks*I don't think it's physically possible for me to take off this roller.
>>19615613Jack takes his mask off.Under it... another mask."WAT." you say as you execute a perfect face fault.
>>19615700I guess the luck stayed stuck to you.
>>19615765Tell Jack to remove all of the masks
rolled 74 = 74"Become capable of clear audible speech, Soldier!"
>>19615773In before infinite masks.
>>19615765>fucking nested gasmasks....wat.
>>19615765"Eh. As long as what you say Is understandable, that's fine."
>>19615765SOLDIER! WHAT IS YOUR MAJOR MALFUNCTION!? I ORDERED YOU TO REMOVE YOUR MASK, IN SUCH I EXPECTED ALL MASKS TO BE REMOVED, AND POSSIBLY TO SEE YOUR TATAS!>>19615767Seems so. Should wear off eventually though.
>>19615816Oh the mental images.
"sorry bout that." came a muffled voice from behind the second mask, "layered protection."Jack rips off the second mask.Jack, the soldier you assumed was nothing more than a guy, was actually a girl."Wait... You're a girl?""Is anything wrong sir?" She asks."Err... No. So, huh... hmnnn.."She tilts her head as was her usual manner when confused. Without her mask in the way, she looks fairly cute doing so."Miss Jack, will you please teach us how to operate the machinery please." J comes to your rescue.She nods, smiles and says "Sure, It's all very simple."---------------------------------------------------------------The crashcourse over, you head back into the gym with the unmasked Jack."It's basically like driving a heavy tractor." you hazily remember her saying as you walked up the bleachers towards the girls."Hayate..." Ursula and Hina say at the same time"You come out of the gym for a few minutes, and you come back with a cute girl?" Erica puts their thoughts into words.WAT DO/SAY?
>>19615889"Huh? You've already met her before though. It's Jack."
>>19615889What? You guys already know jack.
rolled 1 = 1>>19615889"I didn't know, I swear. You've seen the uniform she wears, with that mask on it's impossible to tell."
>>19615889Technically the cute girl's been here since I got the Land Raider.
rolled 75 = 75"Why are you even surprised at this point?"Alternative: "Yes"
>>19615889"Same girl I left with. Jack, this is Erica and Ursula, my girlfriends. Girls, this is Jack, my... uh, driving instructor.">>19615901STOP ROLLING YOU FAAAAG.
The God-Emperor knew this would happen, didn't he?He planned all of this from the very beginning, just to see shenanigans ensue.
>>19615912Yes, I thought so.>>19615916Jeeze, I didn't mean to, I thought I'd already removed it.
Girls, allow me to reintroduce Jack the krieg guardswoman the emperor gave us to drive the tank
>>19615889Shit Erica quit your bitchin'
>>19615920Naturally, emps may be a bro but he likes to play jokes still
>>19615901"I didn't know, I swear. You've seen the uniform she wears, with that mask on it's impossible to tell."You tell them.Of course, the universe in all it's brilliant cruelty decides to give you a bit more hurdles to jump at that exact moment.Perrinne walks up to you from where she had been sitting with her team."..." she looks at Jack."..." she looks at you."..." she looks at the other girls."An excellent idea Perrinne." Ursula tells her with a nod. "Sister, It seems like our boyfriend here needs some 'education' this evening.""I'll look into the equipment we'll need." she answers with a dangerous look in her eyes."Jack, accompany us in watching the next battle. Maybe you could tell us more about yourself as we watch." Ursula tells the girl in the heavy coat."Ma'am, yes ma'am." The Krieger salutes her. ------------------------------------------------------------------You are now down on the floor, lined up with your team.Facing you is Yuki and her team, determination on their faces."Okay Kiddies, Like we said earlier, this battle will have some extra features in store for you.""The Director has graced us with her presence and will be observing this fight as well, so don't forget to give us a good show." Mike and The Dude tells you."Do your best, and have fun." They say as the world fades as the battleground is generated around you.**ROLL FOR BATTLE GROUND**1-30 Bureau31-60 City67-90 SPACE91-100 Roller's choice [just type in what you want]Taking the 5th roll
rolled 71 = 71>>19616161>our boyfriend here needs some 'education' this eveningThanks, Udz. All of our evening plans are now shot to hell.
rolled 89 = 89>>19616161the Titanic as it's sinking.
rolled 73 = 73>>19616161on a falling space station. because that is awsome
rolled 45 = 45>>19616161VOLCANO BATTLE
rolled 20 = 20>>19616161Our hometown.
rolled 32 = 32>>19616161on the motherfucking sun
rolled 69 = 69>>19616161Racoon City ZooLet's fight while zombie animals are trying to fuck our shit up
rolled 4 = 4>>19616161SPACE
rolled 28 = 28>>19616161A space station falling from orbit
rolled 17 = 17>>19616161Planet made entirely of Penises.
rolled 89 = 89>>19616191I second the Sun.
rolled 98 = 98>>19616190aw boring.
rolled 3 = 3The Engineering Bay of the All Under Heaven, with Cheryl and the Avatar of Virtue as the Announcers and the entire crew in the stands cheering.
>>19616232Comeon, we'd have the opportunity to nostalgia and blow the shit out of that place. Not to mention tactical advantages.
rolled 66 = 66Your Mom!
rolled 50 = 50A women's hot spring.
>>19616248I meant the fact that he rolled the bureau for our arena
rolled 46 = 46>>19616243This would be really funny. And very Meta.Perfect for an Editors game.
>>19616176Totally worth it.Can you name what those plans would be?
>>19616387Get Mio to help us search the house and beach for hidden treasure.Finish curing our batch of Moonlight and showing it to Ryu. Working on new potions (invisibility and sense enhancement ones).Working on making that natural pool pond for Mandy.
>>19616190The fade-to-black didn't work as you expected it to.Instead of finding yourself in a new battlefield, you find yourselves standing in the gym, in the same positions that you were earlier, with the confused opposing team still right in front of you.This happened last time as well, when you fought Nanoha and Vita, but instead of finding an abandoned Bureau, there all around you are the people watching and your instructors."Err... What's going on?" You ask Mike.The Director answers you in his place."Chosen battlefield, real world Bureau. Any and all collateral damage allowed. This is not a simulation.""Well, you heard her kid." Mike says from beside her."But what about the spectators?" You ask them now that you see that there seems to be no barrier in place like when you fought him."Let us worry about that. Now, start the match!" The Dude says from his seat next to Mike.MATCH STARTED,REAL WORLD STAGEWAT DO?
>>19616416All of which can be done another day.
>>19616176Should we learn to jam those conversations some time?
>>19616420Reality Bubble thing.Also how are we supposed to fight if we can actually hurt them now?
>>19616420Bunnymode. Drago. Punch one of the Hidamaris in the face.
>>19616420Sit down and declare this to be some ol bullshit
>>19616420butler assassin time.bunnymode invisible knife in the throat for the summoners.>>19616437with discretion.
>>19616420>real-world>not a simOh boy.Pull out our Molotov gun and begin lobbing paintballs as we clench our cigar in our teeth, creating Walls of Havana. Use the distraction to generate a clone, go invisible, activate Bunny Mode, shank the Hidamari girls.Mentillate to the team our plan.
>>19616437The normal way. You think the safeties haven't been engaged?
>>19616465Wouldn't put it past them
Contradicting orders... we need to really fight Yuki, but we need to protect her.Depressing story time!
>>19616487Just PTSD them all to avoid the fight.
>>19616420The hell with this noise then.Start doing something stupid and unrelated to combat to express how we feel about this situation. Maybe just grab Erica and make out or something.
>>19616420we could also try combat music: ultimate lullaby
>>19616420>Any and all collateral damage allowed. EEEEEE->This is not a simulation.Eeeh?Well, whatever.>playing Borderlands>activate weapon vendor>"Is shooting bullets just not cool enough for you? Get a Maliwan, and light some people on fire!"Yesssss. Paintball guns away!
>>19616523>>19616509>>19616487Im all for sleep or ptsd.If we knock them out tie them up with liquorish and declare victory in the name of Wonka.
>>19616520Are you going to be this stupid every time we're given orders to do combat exercises with friends?
>>19616542>"you don't need to be a better shot, you just need to shoot more bullets!"guess Sasha was made by Vladof
>>19616576>"Hyperion asks, what good is a gun that doesn't shoot where you point? Get a gun that's as accurate as you are!">just picked up a Hyperion shotgun>named Fatal DeathWell I guess I can be sure people will die when I kill them...
>>19616461This or get the landraider and drive over some god damn lolis.
we're agreed that we should avoid spilling blood if at all possible, until we know for sure that at least violence isn't going to carry over, yes?
>>19616648Accurate shotguns were pretty much the tits in that game.That and playing Mordeck Kai fully specced for dealing bullshit levels of dps with elemental revolvers.
I have to wonder if the purpose of this exercise is to train us not to hesitate in harming or killing eachother in the event of SUE contamination.
>>19616664Yes. Easiest method should be to ask Mike if the secondary barriers are in place.Or we can ask Kraus.
>>19616654The loli's would probably draw another tank and we have tank warsLoli tank battles actually sounds pretty cool
>>19616691Agents have gone rogue in the past, and it's our job to hunt them down. I think it was mentioned during one of our sims in Basic.
>avoid spilling blood"Director, a word please." you say with your hand up"Proceed.""Can we opt to subdue or capture the opposition instead of taking them out?" you ask her"... Your orders are to eliminate. Not to capture." She tells you."But ma'am!" you object with a look at Yuki"Kid, Just do as she says." Mike says."Or maybe you're willing to forfeit?" The Dude asks.WAT DO?
>>19616720We have to trust that the bureau wouldn't throw agents away in something like this so we fight them bit don't go all outUnless of course everyone else wants to step out then we now out
>>19616720Comply. It's not like the medical technology here can't heal up injuries incurred during training.
>>19616720"Ma'am, with all due respect, is this some sort of bullshit test?"
>>19616720start putting holes in people then, but don't go overboard.
>>19616720The lady says eliminate, we have to assume they'll be safe in the end.We hit Yuki, invisible knife mode. Gai & Hina each go for one of the artist girls, Erica... does Erica things.
>>19616720I am so willing to forfeit you don't even knowso willing
>>19616720>Your orders are to eliminate. Not to capture.New orders overtake previous order. Eliminate opponents, zero tolerance.Let us begin this battle, we will not hold back. Let's try to take out the sketchbooks.
>>19616750Erica can keep the two other girls busy with suppressive fire.
>>19616762As I said, Erica Things.
>>19616720Yeah that doesn't sound cool at all.Sit this one out.
rolled 96 = 96>>19616720Meh, they're not gonna go easy on us, take out land raider proceed to fuck shit up.
>>19616720This is a rigged ass shit test if ever there was one.
>>19616740Uh, injuries DON'T occur during training. That's the entire point of the simulations; nobody actually gets physically hurt.>This is not a simulation.This is the part I don't get. The only reason she'd have for pointing this out is to confuse and distract us.So yes, it IS some sort of bullshit test and>summoners>we're distractedBRING OUT THE FUCKING TANK RIGHT NOW
>>19616720[X] Call bullshit
>>19616743"I mean, it's possible and even likely that this is a simulation and you're just lying to me to see if I'll follow orders. But if so, I'd prefer to know."
>>19616720"Define what you mean by eliminate."
>>19616720Summon tank, crush Lolis.
>>19616804>So yes, it IS some sort of bullshit testOr, because we don't feel pain during most combat simulations (as evidenced when we blew our hand off during the class battle royale), not being inside a simulation means that we have to deal with pain and whether or not we can deal with it during combat.
>>19616784>>19616804>>19616876Guys, there's a time and a place for tank based mayhem, and that is after we've given Yuki our... personal attention.
>>19616883but people die if they are killed
>>19616893No attention later, tank now.
>'This is not a simulation'>People still suggesting cutting throats and crushing with tanks
Or you know we can ask out team what they want to do, and given consensus we do the whole tank thing.
>>19616912Gonna have to go with this guy.
"...We'll do it. But please have it on record that I am personally against this.""M-me too." Yuki says from across the floor."Noted." The Director says with a nod."Ehhh... We're doing it?" The girl with the X's asks her blonde teammate"Sounds like fun." she answers as she pulls out a sketchpad."Everyone, I have a suggestion." gai says loud enough for you and the oponents to hear."Let's move this fight outside, there we can move more freely and avoid some damage to the buildings and the people in them.""Agreed." The girl with the huge robot hands says on Yuki's side before she and the one with the katana bolts for the door, the rest of her team follows suite.After giving them ample time to prepare, you and your team also head on outside.FIGHT STARTED.WAT DO?[ ]Priority, drawing girls[ ]Priority, Yuki[ ]Priority, other girls
>>19616938>After giving them ample time to prepareDoesn't matter, we're fucked.
>>19616938[x]Priority, YukiHer summons are faster than that of the sketch girls, and could easily swarm us.
[X] Priority, TANK
>>19616938[x]Priority, YukiShe can summon tons of shit and is squishy, so she dies first.Next the drawing girls.
>>19616938[x]Priority, drawing girls
>>19616720No real reason to fight, as this is just training for the younger class, and they've promised us no reward.I say we just nope the fuck out of here, because the girls got their experience and were not going to attack our friends when there's a chance of them getting hurt.
>>19616938>[ ]Priority, YukiSee >>19616750>>19616930However, we take out Yuki, and she can't summon armies at the drop of a book. The best tactical option is to take her out as fast as we can.
>start the match>first opponent comes up>knife through the neck>next one gets laser to the face>blood and mayhem, snappin' necks left and right>audience is horrified>"What the hell are you doing?!">"You told me to eliminate the opposition! I even asked!"
>>19616938[x]Priority, YukiShe's able to summon a damn army.
>>19616938[x] Drawing girlsYuki probably has less raw power than 'Rocks Fall, Everyone Dies: The Graphic Novel' so yeah.
>>19616969Yeah this whole thing ain't sitting right with me.Maybe challenge them to a game of chess or something less killy.
>>19616938Realize that we are incapable of bringing ourselves to hurt our friends and go back inside.
>>19616995>Yeah this whole thing ain't sitting right with me.Then maybe you shouldn't have signed up to be a CIA Deep Cover Operative/KGB Wet Work Specialist/FBI Field Agent.
>>19616969I agree with this guy.
>>19617021I signed up to get space pussy.
>>19617043This is the price of space pussy.
>>19616983"Are you not entertained!?" you yell into the crowd."Is this not why your here!?" you throw your belt sword at the Director.
>>19617077Well fuuuuck that. I'll stick to the regular stuff then.
>>19616969ThirdedSomething is off about this whole thing
>Priority YUKI"You guys keep the others occupied, Gai see if you can take on those two that went ahead first. From what I remember the white haired girl is a physical fighter like you." You begin laying the plans for your team"Erica, Hina, you two keep the girls that paint pinned down. Don't let them draw anything. If we can stop that, they're pretty much useless.""and you?" Erica asks"I'll take on Yuki."The four of you split up, aiming for your targets.Gai follows the two girls in black out into the open quad, Hina nad Erica approach their targets that have stationed themselves on the cafeteria roof, and you follow Yuki as you see her enter the Library.---------------------------------------------------The library, this labyrinthine place is basically an armory for Yuki. Any book she grabs off the shelves could be used against you and your team.You must take her out, and take her out fast.**ROLL TO FIND AND INTERCEPT YUKI**>taking the 6th roll
>>19617043And the price was being an enforcer.Said so right up-front.And the rest of you guys are acting as if the Phlat-Armor isn't even turned on.
>>19617087The "something off" is that this is a simulation, and the Director is lying about it to see how we react.
rolled 61 = 61>>19617099Totally not the sixth roll.
rolled 59 = 59>>19617099Go invisible. It should help. Unless Yuki's already summoned guards.
rolled 42 = 42>>19617099Not really feelin it but alright here's some dice I guess
rolled 42 = 42>>19617099Let's get it started.
rolled 5 = 5>>19617099"Yuki, I don't like this, but if you don't show yourself i'm going to set this place on fire.
rolled 25 = 25>>19617099I just hope she doesn't Summon Bigger Fish on us...
rolled 34 = 34>>19617099Findan skills.Not 6th post, but hey, rollan filler.
rolled 7 = 7>>19616938
rolled 56 = 56>>19617104Still don't think murderin' little girls is the best way to react then.
rolled 54 = 54>>19617099Rolling.You know, this reeks of being a test set up by the Director specifically for us. We did tell her we were going to protect Yuki, didn't we?
rolled 9 = 9>>19617099We must trick her into reading an adult romance book, preferably one where a cute librarian is whisked away by a dashing gentleman.
rolled 92 = 92>>19617120Well, it could be worse.
>>19617120Gentlemen, I hope you like Spartans.
>>19617127And is coddling her really protecting her?
>>19617127We really don't have anything to lose by calling bullshit.We've performed hella well in every combat sim so far, they already know we can fight just fine.
rolled 1 = 1>>19617141it also could have been much much better,
>>19617146Stabbing her in the gut or whatever definitely isn't.
>>19617150Stop rolling, Lookout.
>>19617104Almost certain it's this.
>>19617150I am highly amused now.
>Woohooo rAIN!I really really hope that's a local weather tweet.>>19617150Fucking typical.
>>19617141>>19617150Well that was amusing.Lookout, pic related.
>>19617099Forfeit the match already this is unsettling.
>>19617104No you fucking grognard there is something aside from that wrong about this situationBeing lied to about the sim is nothing, their reaction to us asking about it is wrongIs this bureau mostly empty? Or is there people around going about their business while we go wrecking things?
>>19617178We already agreed to do it.
>>19617188Grow a fucking pair and don't get cowed into hurting people because >hurr orders is orders
>>19617188Personally, I'd rather see where this is going, first.
>I see the ending. and dear god it will leave a lot of bad taste in your mouths.Don't suppose he planned this, do you? Yeah why am I asking? I know he did.
>>19617120You walk swiftly down the book-lined halls looking for that girl that had been placed in your charge recently.As you turned down one aisle, a large lion with a ram's head growing out of it's back confronts you with a mighty roar.It's a goddamn chimera.**ROLL FOR FIGHTAN**
>>19617185Don't suppose negabureau do you?
rolled 37 = 37>>19617242
rolled 64 = 64The best way to help is to go all out.THEN you start coddling at a level you know is really hard yet slightly possible.
rolled 63 = 63>>19617242slay the foul beast
rolled 98 = 98>>19617242Wooo, mythical beasts!
rolled 9 = 9>>19617242Godammit, there's goes any hope of finishing this in a stealthy manner.
rolled 3 = 3>>19617242Strike throught the camera with the force of 1000 Suns!
rolled 66 = 66>>19617242Alright I guess we can fight the Chimera.Still don't want to stab anybody.
rolled 60 = 60>>19617250Very nice.
rolled 52 = 52>>Still better than Lookout :)
rolled 21 = 21>>19617242Chimeras.... why'd it have to be Chimeras? I hate Chimeras.
>>19617242I'm fine with killing this thing
Also why not get Kraus to tell us if anything is up?
>>19617243Thinking maybe that or maybe the Susan empty bureau
rolled 99 = 99>>19617264I love chimeras
rolled 35 = 35>>19617254Ooh, doesn't look like I'll be breaking that camera. Let's try breaking the Chimera, instead.
>>19617273Pretty good chance he's in on it if something is.
>>19617276stop that, you might land us another one.
>>19617250"I don't have time for this." You say as you pull out a teacup.Enlarging it to fit squarely over the beast, and throwing one of your molotov bottles in it finishes the creature in a blink of an eye.Not even bothering to check if the thing is truly dead under the cup, you run on through the halls.**roll for finding Yuki again**Taking the highest of the first five rolls
rolled 87 = 87>>19617294woob woob woob
rolled 97 = 97>>19617294We have a swag-dar, right?Turn it on.
rolled 31 = 31>>19617294olly olly oxenfree
rolled 36 = 36>>19617294Rolling to find her and end this exercise.
rolled 79 = 79>>19617294Rolling I guess
rolled 64 = 64>>19617294
>>19617307We have a winner.
Pretty dece, guys. Pretty dece.
So earlier last week I had a dream where I was a girl at the bureau having a threesome with Hayate and Keima.I am giving serious consideration to not reading these threads anymore, it's clearly not good for me.Also I should probably actually read/watch HnG sometime.
>>19617331Was it regular Keima or fem Keima?And was hayate in bunny mode or butler mode?These are important questions
>>19617331Thanks for sharing, weirdo
>>19617331I think that's just in the strikers, but then again...>>19617307No you need to quest more.
>>19617331Seems pretty normal to me.
>>19617331Yeah, it's okay. Everyone on /tg/ develops a taste for sausage eventually, it's just a matter of which sausage they choose to bring inside them.
>>19617382Yeah, it's okay. Everyone on 4chan develops a taste for sausage eventually, it's just a matter of which sausage they choose to bring inside them.FtfyPersonally i blame /d/.
>>19617395Ever see a traditional hentai pic and get confused when there was no dick? Fucking /d/....
>>19617436Ayup, i've lost more than one girl to revealing even basic fetishes gained there.
>>19617395Hey I avoided liking the sausage for 5 years as a /d/eviantThree weeks with LG and I was ready to screw traps however...Still not taking sausage only giving
>>19617456That's completely reasonable, bro.
>>19617456Give it awhile longer.
>>19617453Weirdly enough I have the opposite of you there fritz, I got if not a permanent girlfriend but something approaching thatI was drinking with a girl I knew who had broken up with her boyfriend a few weeks back and drunken conversation got into such things.I am small time compared to the things that girl likes though
>>19617344Well... it was a long dream, there was plenty of time for different situations.
>>19617477All i ask for is a girl who will occasionally do strap on, i don't think that's too much to ask for.
>>19617307You find her by pure chance as she ran through the history section grabbing books off the shelves."H-how'd you find me so fast?" She asks as she continues to run."a butler always knows where his lady is." You tell her as you sprint, quickly catching up with her.You grab her hand, and stop her from running."Yuki, wait. Don't you think this is weird?""W-what is?""Well, the Director setting us loose against each other in the real world. This not being a simulation. Why would she do that?""I-I don't know... But I'm sure she has her reasons." She shakes your hand off and opens a book.There, standing before you, is a pair of men in long brown robes.Swords of light in their hands.**ROLL FOR FIGHTAN**>taking the 7th roll
>>19617524Fritz, don't take this the wrong way, but...Are German girls really that vanilla?I was kind of under the impression that you guys couldn't even get off without spilling at least a little blood first.
rolled 81 = 81>>19617534baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaalls
rolled 3 = 3>>19617534Oh for fucks sake Yuki, we're trying to talk. You could at least stop fighting for a minute and listen.
rolled 69 = 69>>19617534Jedi? We might be boned.
rolled 91 = 91>>19617534They aren't movie, game, or animooted jedi, they're fallible!
rolled 2 = 2>>19617534>JedisWell fuck.
rolled 4 = 4>>19617534Watch out, that one jedi is actually Liam Neeson in disguise.
rolled 62 = 62Where? Where is the seventh roll?
rolled 44 = 44>>19617553pfff
rolled 7 = 7>>19617549>implying the book EU jedi aren't just as mary sue as the rest.
>>19617559>62Eh, good enough.
rolled 46 = 46>>19617534It's okay their completely incompetent, their from episode 1. Even a nat 1 would allow us to trick and destroy them.
>>19617559Oh, there it is.
rolled 61 = 61>>19617534Fightan skillz>>19617540I am german but i was born in the us, visited a couple times though, and i do prefer german girls though.
>>19617559I think everyone saw six and no one wanted to be number seven when we were fighting JEDI.
rolled 2 = 2>>19617534Dices!>>19617553Yeah, we're fucked.
>>19617559good save Udz, was worried with the 2 and 4 lol
>>19617563Shhh.>>19617576And it's better'n the 44 we would have if I hadn't.
>>19617570Can't say I blame you. Pale as all fuck, which is great if you're into it.
>>19617589The accents, to, man.That visceral fear that comes from having someone yell at you in German has always enhanced my experience.
>>19617633Indeed, that's another place where i've found american girls are lacking.
>>19617650American and British girls are probably the two worst kinds simply because they are so goddamned blandMy favorite girl was Danish. Everything good about European girls and more
>>19617650I'd defend my own nation's women, but really, I like exotic girls. And really, sad fact is that, this being a melting pot sort of place, there's no actual "American".I have foreign friends that say they like "American Girls", but fuck if I know what that even is.
>>19617672Never had a dane, might have to look for one.>>19617707Indeed.
You pull out a pair of your silver sabers and meet them head on as they covered Yuki's retreat.The two robed figures moved gracefully like ballet dancers, while each strike they aimed at you was filled with power.You are barely able to fight them off as they gang up on you. Not able to make an offensive move, as defending against the pair the most that you can do.You need to give yourself the advantage.WAT DO?[ ]Call for back-up[ ]FAMILIARS[ ]Other
>>19617731[ ]OtherTimestop, knife to the face.
>>19617731>[x] Other: Timestop
>>19617731Clone & T-Rex. Assuming the cooldown on the clone is up. Otherwise J & Lo along with Ted.
>>19617731>Any and all collateral damage allowed.[x] HONK HONK IMMA TONK
>>19617741I think we should cool it on the timestop for a while. Also we already used it up for today in the last few rounds.
>>19617731How does one defeat a Jedi? Put your sword away and tell them that we will not fight them, we merely wish to speak with Yuki.
>>19617762Oh, then bunnymode and knife to the face, or>>19617769
>>19617769Oh man did anyone here ever play Mysteries of the Sith?
>>19617789Seriously this shit is you clowns answer to every fucking challenge.
>>19617731FamiliarsHave J drop a fucking TANK on the Jedi and see how they like that disturbance in the force
>>19617796I suspect metagaming to try to get Susan.
>>19617789We used our timestop already
>you are out of timestop for the day.>used it up in the last round.
>>19617779Alright basically you play as scrub-tier Jedi apprentice Mara Jade and kickass Jedi master Kyle Katarn gets his shit all corrupted and darkside-y on some Sith tomb planet. In the final boss fight against him you straight up cannot hurt him at all. You win the game by putting your lightsaber away, causing him to realize what he is doing or some shit.
>>19617836In that case, I'm supporting this course of action>>19617769
>>19617731Shoot them in the eyes, if they block then that's molten lead flying at them. Laserswords can only block other lasers, not metal.
>>19617836Drop the Land Raider on them.So anyway, >>19617331 here. As apparently Hayate and Keima are now my husbandos or something I think I should know the source material. I already read TWGOK, should I go for the manga or anime for HnG?
>>19617852I don't think you understand how lightsabers work.http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/LightsaberWhy don't you read this over.
>>19617769This, and it's the truth. We don't actually really want to fight her like this.They want us to eliminate each other... well, it's time to do what we do best instead: befriend the shit out of our "enemies".
I seem to have run out of energy for dealing with the world.Good luck, gents.
>>19617864The manga is better by all accounts but the anime is a lot more condensedIt all depends if you have the time to watch a series longer than DBZ or read a series longer than most libraries stock
Alright it's 4:15 AM and I have a plane to catch tomorrow.Don't kill Yuki you stupid fuckers.Peace.
Sooo uhhh consensus is?>>19617864MANGO. It has more delicious Maria[and you'd need to switch to it anyway, since the animu ends early.]
>>19617937Other, tell them we don't want to fightAnd if that doesn't work have J drop a fucking tank on them
>>19617937It seems to be weapons away and then parlay.
>>19617937Don't fight Jedi, talk this crazy shit out.
>>19617937>talkYou put your swords away and bring your hands up to show them empty."Please, I just want to talk to her. I mean her no harm." you tell them.They look at you and each other.**ROLLEM**
rolled 92 = 92>>19617981
rolled 24 = 24>>19617981It's the truth.
rolled 73 = 73>>19617981DICEPLOMACY
rolled 78 = 78>>19617981Rollan for getting across sincerity.
>>19617988LOOKOUT HAD A GOOD ROLLNOBODY ELSE ROLL
>>19617988The swords of light dissapear into the ornate hilts the men held as they wordlessly stood to the side to let you pass.You run after Yuki.She's lost herself again, here in this place that she might possibly consider her first home.Among the aisles of books and tomes, the quiet shy girl has put up walls and barriers to protect herself.You turn another corner, calling out her name.What greeted you wasn't her, but something a bit more unexpected.There, standing at the other end of that dimly lit, book entombed hall was a figure wearing a butler's uniform.With a silver sword in-hand, and blue hair swaying with each step, this person approaches you a determined look in their eyes.
NEXT TIME ON MSQ:L'Homme au Masque de FerNew thread at 2200 4chan time.
>>19618070CALLING IT NOW, YUKI WROTE A DIARY
>>19618070DUN DUN DUUUUUUNAnd now, blessed sleep.
Anyone else think that Yuki is total hax? I mean, writing an entire army into existence is kinda ridiculous. With the kind of talent the Bureau has, I'm surprised we haven't taken the role of the Guard.
>>19618111We have nowhere near the manpower, supply lines or anything else of the guardAll we have is super powered agents that can be easily outnumbered or beaten by working around their skills
damn, missed the thread. but for next time, we have a way to find out for sure whether this is actually a simulation.We just need to find something to hat. That won't work outside a sim.Once we confirm it's a sim, we hat the simulated Director. She's fucking with us, we fuck with her.
>>19618183Hat the simulated directorI quite like this plan, it seems a bit suicidal and beyond our capabilities to sustain outside the sim but fun to tryOr we hat the real director and she just looks at us confused
>>19618194Oh, I don't think we can actually fully manage it, this is was above Naru-level even. But we can mess things up a bit in the attempt, and we're not trying to bring this one with us We have really awesome data-manipulation abilities and are fueled by our anger at her setting us up to hurt someone we love, we might stand a chance of exerting enough influence via the hat to make sim-director call of the fight, or allow us to capture rather than kill or something
>>19618090So this is "scary library" hayate, or is this one the kissyface Hayate?or maybe an amalgamation?
>>19618221White Knight Hayatte.An idealized version of us without flaws.
>>19618221Porcelain knight Hayate
>>19618232This one has a demented look in its eyes. I doubt that's what she would idealise us as.
>>19618215Above it like the sun is above a spark
>>19618252Determined not demented So yes idealized version
>>19618263Oh duh, I am blind.
LG, hey LGEGO's getting his mad on in the 'suggest non-shitty quests' thread
>>19618309It is hilarious really isn't it?Almost like he is almost about to break down crying about how no one loves his shitty quests
>>19618478Nah. Don't get me wrong, the guy is the most pathetic excuse for a writer I've ever seen, but he's nowhere close to crying. He still has to finish building up enough steam to throw a hissy-fit about how life doesn't revolve around him, and then he cries.
>>19618478I liked his first quest. His jealous butthurt crusade has made me lose all respect for him though. Seriously, get over it already.
I wonder if we could hat Yuki's Hayate and steal it.
>>19620566...Main!HayateClone!HayateSusan!HayateConstruct!HayateSo much Hayate. But which hat would we use?
>>19619760His Holy Grail War Quest, and its sidestory quest are entertaining.I just wish he would let the rage against MSQ die. It's not like his quests are being starved for attention.