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  • File: 1331507977.jpg-(1.04 MB, 1600x1200, Seattle2072Right1600x1200.jpg)
    1.04 MB SHADOWRUN STORYTIME TwoDee !qQigT1sixA 03/11/12(Sun)19:19 No.18291189  
    Dear /tg/,

    Yesterday was my Godparents' son's wedding. As my brain, the recent recipient of well over a dozen hard alcoholic drinks, tried to make sense of the world around me, I briefly began to ponder the nature of life in a world of technological wizardry and base human sins.

    Then I drunk-dialed my girlfriend and took a gigantic shit.

    I guess where I'm going with this is, SHADOWRUN STORYTIME.

    Previous threads:

    >In which 2D the technomancer, Dervish the rocketorc, and DeadMan the ninja go on Shadowrunny adventures and learn what it is to be a mercenary.

    >In which DeadMan tries to sell the team out for the second time and gets his just desserts, and Geppetto the gothy black magician joins the team.

    >In which the team recovers a priceless music CD for Mr. Johnson, Tank the troll joins the team, ghost Vikings are fist-fought, and Geppetto is infected with HMHVV and turns into a banshee.
    >> TwoDee !qQigT1sixA 03/11/12(Sun)19:22 No.18291231
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    So, the story picks up a few months after the last run was finished, as the team took a well-deserved winter vacation off their profits from the JetBlack run. Darius St.George and JetBlack, themselves, went off to establish their own independent record label, with Black operating under a pseudonym because it would cause kind of a stir if Kurt Cobain’s ghost just up and bought himself a rap label, and this was basically the equivalent.

    During GEPPETTO’S vacation, Geppetto died, came back as something much worse, ate a bunch of homeless peoples’ souls, and joined a magical group in the Italian mafia, the Merlyns.

    During DERVISH’S vacation, Dervish learned a little bit about his past (namely that he was a hitman then, too), started training under a dirty-ass Mexican pit fighter in the barrens, and moved in with Geppetto as a roommate. To quote one of my own players, “It’s banshee and rocketorc, together at home!” Dervish dicked off around the house for about a month, annoying the neighbors by watching porn at full blast, texting through neighborhood watch meetings, and taking his pimped-out motorcycle for 3:00 AM rides.
    >> Anonymous 03/11/12(Sun)19:23 No.18291236
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    >> Anonymous 03/11/12(Sun)19:23 No.18291246
    Just read these in the archives.
    Bring it on, man. I need inspiration for the game I'm assuredly going to run in the next week or so.
    >> TwoDee !qQigT1sixA 03/11/12(Sun)19:24 No.18291259
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    During TWODEE’S vacation, 2D called a truce with Evo Biomedical Seattle, moved with his psychopathic juggalo girlfriend to a wind-farm in Snohomish, and nearly killed himself to give “birth” to a Free Sprite. He vows to raise the little tyke like a real boy, which is kind of difficult when 2D’s “son,” Trigger (named for the fact that he was mostly derived from an aiming autosoft from a Doberman combat drone), is temporarily housed in his toaster for lack of a better body. He also hung out with John, his ghoulfriend, as thanks for “saving” Geppetto’s “life.”

    During TANK’S vacation, he got the piss shot out of him by the runner team of a fixer he’d wronged, and spent the better part of two weeks in intensive care. His poor, adorable little sister, Arianna, returned home from elementary school to find her pleasant suburban house a smoldering bloodstained wreck, surrounded by Knight-Errant officers.
    >> TwoDee !qQigT1sixA 03/11/12(Sun)19:28 No.18291301
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    Did you guys ever watch the Venture Brothers, where there was that scene with all the normally-heartless supervillains chipping in to help barn-raise the Monarch’s hideout out of the goodness of their hearts? When Arianna, sobbing and alone, called up the only emergency contacts on Tank’s phone—his running team—it turned into that. 2D, Dervish, and Geppetto would give this little girl a place to live, goddamn it, or they weren’t morally questionable mercenaries.

    Because, you see, if they didn’t do this, they’d just be pure evil, not questionable.

    The rail-thin channer, the creepy albino elf in the black suit, and the buff-as-shit rocket orc were not exactly well-received by Tank’s nosy neighbors. The cops were called for fear of how sketch the team was, but luckily Geppetto had a nice chat with an officer about how we were just rebuilding this poor little girl’s home. It occurred to me briefly that we were probably giving Arianna an incredibly stilted view of the altruism of Shadowrunners, but whatever, she was adorable and deserved it.
    >> TwoDee !qQigT1sixA 03/11/12(Sun)19:33 No.18291357
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    While we were working on refurbishing the bullet-strewn wall paneling, Arianna brought up a problem at home that she was having. We were almost eager to hear about the inconsequential problems of a child as opposed to the often-murderous demands of the Mr. Johnson of the week, so, putting aside partially-finished modular furniture for a SoyKaf break (or, for Geppetto, utility guy down the street whose body would never be found break), we sat her down and asked her what was up.

    Arianna was almost out of elementary school, and Tank had paid the school good money to ignore the fact that she was SINless. However, her grades were stellar, so she wanted to apply to a private prep school for middle school. The problem here, of course, was that she NEEDED a legitimate SIN, because bribes won’t cut it at a prep school. She wanted to go down to the SIN registry and get chipped, but there was a problem; she was a minor, and thus she had to be legally in the custody of an adult with a SIN. So, Tank would have to get a SIN too, which was very bad for business.

    Wanting to help the adorable little girl follow her dreams, but not wanting to gimp poor Tank, the runners approached a corrupt bureaucrat within the SIN registry (as referred to them by Danny the fixer) with a special request.
    >> TwoDee !qQigT1sixA 03/11/12(Sun)19:40 No.18291443
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    Feel free to keep a running commentary going, by the by. Otherwise this shit autosages way before I can finish the story. The 4Chan model does not smile upon storytime-format threads.


    We wanted to get a fake SIN under Tank’s real identity. That way, he could keep the SIN for as long as it took for the prep school to do a background check on Arianna, then scrap it. His identity would only be vulnerable for a small window. A quick call to Tank in the hospital, who confirmed that he liked this plan, and the job was on.

    The SIN, as it turned out, was expensive. Enough so that Tank couldn’t afford it and the team had to pay for it for him while he was getting released from the hospital. But, we figured it’d hold up when Arianna got interviewed. We set up an interview appointment with an agent from the prep school, to make sure that everything was in order and help Arianna give off a good impression.

    Unfortunately, when the interviewer, a shrewish-looking woman in a beige skirt-suit, scanned Tank’s spanking new SIN, she rolled nothing but hits, and he rolled a critical glitch.

    Twice, having attempted to edge the first glitch.

    Luckily, she didn’t realize it was a fake, because it was under his real biometrics.

    What she did realize was that this poor man’s SIN had an error, and she had better call the registry to get him re-instantiated right away! Two police officers escorted Tank down to the SIN registry as Arianna began the interview.

    This is where 2D called the registry contact, a conversation that both began and ended with him screaming “GIVE US OUR FUCKING MONEY BACK.”
    >> TwoDee !qQigT1sixA 03/11/12(Sun)19:44 No.18291503
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    So, Tank and Arianna got SINs. Which was great for Arianna’s scholarly career (she had aced the interview!), except Tank had yet to break it to his tiny sister that there was a running team out for his blood who could now, without a doubt, identify her as a blood relation whom he loved very much.

    After a quick deliberation, 2D basically browbeat Geppetto into accepting Tank and Arianna as two MORE roommates (Dervish having already moved in), because it was either Geppetto’s or his place, and a wind farm with a glass façade in front, a hacker-ganger couple living within, an infectious cannibal zombie best friend who stopped by periodically, a baby AI with no sense of right and wrong compiling in the kitchen, and a home node filled with guro pornography was neither a healthy nor safe place to raise a child.

    Geppetto relented that, yes, an inconspicuous house in the suburbs was probably a better place to hide Tank and his sister from murderous shadowrunners than the Fucking Juggalo 4Chan Wind Farm (tm). Even if he didn’t particularly relish four people, one of whom was a gigantic troll, living in his modest home.
    >> Anonymous 03/11/12(Sun)19:45 No.18291523
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    I got nothing to say other than: great story. keep going
    >> Anonymous 03/11/12(Sun)19:48 No.18291548
    I know it probably didn't seem so at the time, but damn, that Tank/Deadman/Trout is just the obligatory comic relief
    >> TwoDee !qQigT1sixA 03/11/12(Sun)19:53 No.18291612
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    This marks the end of my notes for this storytime, so expect me to go a little slower as I type everything out.

    After the little vacation was shattered by the move-in of a fuckhueg troll and a tiny little girl to Geppetto's place, Danny got in contact with the team again. Danny had been so impressed by the team's performance during the last completely-out-of-their-league corp run, that he'd decided to line them up another completely-out-of-their-league corp run! He assured the team that, no, it wasn't something stupidly dangerous like an extraction or a datasteal, and no, Horizon was not involved. Not in the slightest. Seriously, Geppetto, Horizon isn't involved, stop being paranoid!

    Geppetto contacted his former boss at Ares, Bradford Nice, a charismatic, manipulative, rich, middle-management fuck (one of our nicer contacts, if I do say so myself), to see if Nice knew anyone who could get us good suits for the Johnson meet, which was in the private suite in the Eye of the Needle restaurant. Nice referred us to a tailor, and also asked us to...keep him in the loop on our next mission.

    Not suspicious at all, no sirree bob.
    >> TwoDee !qQigT1sixA 03/11/12(Sun)20:04 No.18291730
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    He really was. When he eventually dropped out of the campaign, we had a long stretch of super-serious 80s-tier grimdark, followed by a few of us rolling new, slightly more Pink Mohawk characters to make up for the void. Our current hacker wears a clown mask and our current mage is a Mexican dude with The-Truth-from-GTA-San-Andreas-tier paranoia. Dervish is the only OG left around, and he's seen some shit, dude. But I get ahead of myself.


    So the Johnson is a human with a lot of social and combat ware, most of it delta at the very least. He introduces himself over steaks as a hostage negotiations expert for Ares. Normally it's in the best interests of the Johnson to stay deniable, but in this case his identity was unavoidable. You see, we needed to retrieve the daughter of one Mr. Wilkins, a high-level Ares regional head.

    Helen Wilkins had been kidnapped in broad daylight, along with her backpack, commlink, and scottish terrier Pluton, off the streets of the Seattle Ares compound's elementary school. Ares didn't know how, but somehow Horizon had nabbed footage of the whole thing, and was pulling a "concerned citizen" act by plastering her face all over everything, in the process making Ares out to look inept and weak. Mr. Johnson was not a fan of this. Our job was to retrieve Helen Wilkins from her captors, with a bonus for the retrieval of the school supplies/commlink or the dog.

    The job was fishy from the start, but it's hard to say no to 30 grand and an Ares discounted expense account.
    >> Anonymous 03/11/12(Sun)20:05 No.18291745
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    Pluton is allready dead
    >> Anonymous 03/11/12(Sun)20:09 No.18291786
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    heyo, can I ask a question?
    I see several of you guys had ENEMIES as a negative quality but I cannae find it in the book. is that quality from another sourcebook?
    >> TwoDee !qQigT1sixA 03/11/12(Sun)20:12 No.18291825
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    Well, now we knew why Bradford Nice was interested, at the very least. But we still didn't smell a rat. Or, rather, we all smelled the rat (maybe not Tank), but the smell of the nuyen in the expense account was a lot nicer. 2D kitted out his drones with new guns and tac-cloaks, Tank picked up a new LMG, and Dervish got himself a prize--a silenced sniper rifle.

    We were issued footage of the kidnapping. The girl had been walking to the bus stop when a stepvan pulled up alongside her, the door opened, and a man in a tacsuit grabbed her and pulled her in. The van then disappeared, presumably under a mage's invisibility spell.

    Running on a hunch, 2D hacked the traffic registry system for the compound, and began cross-referencing the feeds from the pressure sensors at stoplights with visual footage from those intersections. It was slow work because another hacker had evidently already been and tried to clean up some tracks (mostly editing displacement of materials in the street, though; he'd forgotten the pressure sensors), but 2D caught the van heading North for a few blocks.

    Then he hit a problem. Namely that the pressure sensors stopped reading and, after checking the cameras, he could confirm that the van was no longer on the road.

    After a bit of backtracking and reverse-editing of footage to reintroduce those discrepancies that the other hacker had removed, 2D's fears were confirmed.

    The invisible van had started flying.
    >> Anonymous 03/11/12(Sun)20:16 No.18291871

    Runner's Companion, I believe?
    >> TwoDee !qQigT1sixA 03/11/12(Sun)20:23 No.18291960
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    It's from Runner's Companion. Vendetta is a modifier quality that can be attached to Enemy to make it even nastier.


    2D can only give the team a rough estimate that the runners had made for Everett, given that it would take a BULLSHIT amount of effort for a mage to maintain the flight spell any longer than a few city blocks. Geppetto takes this info and runs with it, summoning a Spirit of Man (since he follows the Dark Magic tradition and his Mentor Spirit is Adversary, fluffed as Satan, the spirit came out looking kind of like Slender Man), showing it the pictures of the girl and the dog, and tells it that it is to return once it has found them in Everett, or once it has exhaustively searched all of Everett and turned up nothing.

    The Spirit returned in the dead of night, when the rest of the team was asleep (camped out at Geppetto's place). Geppetto himself was awake, what with the whole being undead and not technically having much of a biological need for it any more. It had positively identified both girl and dog in the basement of a dockyard warehouse, being kept in some fashion of cage.

    Dervish was the closest thing we had available to an infiltrator, but we figured if we kept him at a good distance from the warehouse and he merely used his telescoping heat-vision (man, do I love max-rating cybereyes) to scope out the place, then we could get a better idea of what to do. 2D piggybacks into Dervish's cybereyes for additional spotting, and Geppetto assigns the spirit to lead Dervish to the warehouse.

    We were not banking on two things. (1) The enemy had someone who could see astrally, as we should have recognized from the flying invisible van shenanigans earlier. (2) They had spotted the spirit.
    >> Anonymous 03/11/12(Sun)20:24 No.18291977
    sweet. gettin' this for my ex-ganger streetsamu- er... meched-up murderhobo
    >> TwoDee !qQigT1sixA 03/11/12(Sun)20:27 No.18292025
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    The bullet had struck Dervish's skull before he heard it coming.

    The whole team watched the feed as Dervish fell backwards, and then the view flooded with red.

    Geppetto screamed for his man spirit to retrieve Dervish, and to bring him to the hospital as the team scrambled for the hospital, themselves.
    >> Anonymous 03/11/12(Sun)20:30 No.18292067
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    >> Anonymous 03/11/12(Sun)20:31 No.18292080
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    >> Anonymous 03/11/12(Sun)20:33 No.18292122
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    Not Dervish!
    >> Anonymous 03/11/12(Sun)20:33 No.18292134
    >my Godparents' son
    Does that make him your godbrother?
    >> TwoDee !qQigT1sixA 03/11/12(Sun)20:39 No.18292210
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    At the hospital, the SIN register glitched and identified Dervish as SERGEANT Garrett Jordan, veteran of the Amazonia conflict. We weren't about to look a gift horse in the mouth, as he was in a coma, with the bullet lodged just into his brain, somewhere between his frontal and temporal lobes. It was bizarrely impersonal, seeing the big, burly, jocular street sammy just lying there, limp as a ragdoll, his face swathed in bandages, his mouth slightly agape. The doctors told us that he was lucky he had bone lacing augs, or else the damage could have been a lot worse, but the chances were still high that he wouldn't survive.

    The team vowed that the chances were high that the enemy running team wouldn't survive, after this bullshit. With nothing left to do for Dervish, we piled back into the van and made for Everett, hoping to catch the team before they left their safehouse.

    Turning the van over to the gridlink for the time being, 2D popped his flyspy over to Everett and saw that the enemy team was piling into two vehicles, a sedan and the stepvan from earlier. Both had polarized windows, so either could have the girl. Taking a 50-50 chance, 2D dove and began hacking the sedan as the rival mage traced Geppetto's spirit and sent a Beast Spirit after us.

    A gigantic wild boar, mane ablaze with astral fire, manifested across the freeway from us and began charging the van headlong. 2D was zonked, hacking the sedan, but luckily Geppetto had prepared for this eventuality.
    >> TwoDee !qQigT1sixA 03/11/12(Sun)20:44 No.18292260
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    I guess? I wasn't aware if that was a thing.


    He released a spirit that he'd summoned in the hospital, a Fire Spirit, a malevolent demon of eldricht flame. The freeway got treated to the closest thing Shadowrun gets, short of dragons, to a Kaiju battle, with the Fire Spirit beating the Beast Spirit off the car and causing serious collateral damage to the adjacent vehicles in the process. Tank loaded sticknshock and went to town on the giant boar, giving Geppetto a brief moment to look back to 2D.

    It was probably a good thing, two, considering 2D was boiling blood out of his mouth and nose, dangerously close to flatlining.

    With a cry of "oh fuck!" Geppetto launched a healing spell at 2D, knitting together 2D's much-abused neural synapses.

    In netspace, the two high-rating Black Intrustion Countermeasures saw the technomancer that they had just gotten the drop on recompiling. And boy was he pissed.

    2D moved to a different, and frankly dubiously ethical, tactic. He began spamming weak fault sprites at the Black IC, sending them in wave after wave like World War One soldiers charging a machine gun entrenchment. Dozens of fault sprites lost their lives (existences? They're only partially sentient) but eventually 2D brute-forced his way into control of the node.
    >> TwoDee !qQigT1sixA 03/11/12(Sun)20:46 No.18292280

    >Probably a good thing, too

    >> Anonymous 03/11/12(Sun)20:47 No.18292294
    I know absolutely nothing about Shadowrun, but what's a Free Sprite, and why did it nearly kill 2D?
    >> TwoDee !qQigT1sixA 03/11/12(Sun)20:54 No.18292377
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    Sprites are quasi-sentient "Machine Ghosts" that technomancers summon by basically stripping out a line of code from the Matrix, balling it up, and then spitting it out with a fraction of their intelligence. They come in multiple varieties, like a Data Sprite is like super-google, and a Fault Sprite is like the Norton Antivirus from hell. Sprites normally don't last too long, given that they're basically unstable magical computer programs with rudimentary AI. If they DO last too long, though, they gain sentience, and mature into a full-blown AI. 2D witnessed his Machine Sprite becoming Free, and it nearly killed him just by virtue of sheer data input to his brain.


    2D let out a virtual cry of despair as he activated the sedan's interior cameras. It was a decoy, being driven by a single orc with no passengers. Just one lowly street samurai.

    Overcome with rage, 2D dove the sedan and began piloting it himself, picking up speed and aiming for the nearest concrete wall.

    The sammy noticed what was happening and tried the doors, but found them locked. He busted out the driver's side window and leapt out at about 60 miles an hour, sustaining some serious scrapes in the process.

    The sammy knew what fear was when the car he'd dove out of slowed down, turned around, and then began revving its engine again.
    >> Anonymous 03/11/12(Sun)21:02 No.18292459
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    >> TwoDee !qQigT1sixA 03/11/12(Sun)21:05 No.18292493
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    Sprinting like a man possessed, the sammy bobbed and weaved through buildings and alleyways, under assault from his bloodthirsty Hyundai. Every time he made it to a street temporarily inaccessible by the car for a breather, 2D would on-the-fly hack another passing car, located with his flyby, and thus the evil car ghost would be after the sammy yet again. A few shin bruises and rough tumbles later, the sammy had disappeared into an alleyway street market. Curses. More inventive measures would have to be taken if the team wanted anyone left to question, considering that the van was long gone.

    This was when Geppetto loosed his Man Spirit, under the instructions of "Incapacitate him. And make it creative."
    >> Anonymous 03/11/12(Sun)21:05 No.18292497
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    >> Anonymous 03/11/12(Sun)21:07 No.18292520
    >inb4 it stuffs his anus with 24 twinkies and a parrot
    well he won't run...
    >> TwoDee !qQigT1sixA 03/11/12(Sun)21:12 No.18292573
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    As the sammy is passing through the flea market, his one meat arm just reaches out and grabs the CHOICE ASS of a passing lady. At first he begins to think that groping passers-by is not the right way to hide from a deranged hacker on a revenge trip, but the voice in his head that is not a Spirit of Man reassures him: "Dude, appreciating some CHOICE ASS is never wrong."

    The woman calls the cops and, instead of the usual Lone Star flunkies, two Knight-Errant badasses pick up, abandoning their coffee and donuts. The voices in their heads insure them that this is just some two-bit punk. Easy pickings. Everett street trash. What's wrong with a little police brutality? A man has needs. Needs from back in the days of hunters and mammoths. Violence, man, violence. No one will vouch for this fuck. No class action-lawsuits headed your way. Why not go to town on him?

    As the Knight Errant goons, best described as Robocop and his partner, Judge Dredd, pull up and approach the flee market where the street sammy has all but attached himself to the screaming woman's buttocks, the team began to fear Geppetto's spirits.
    >> TwoDee !qQigT1sixA 03/11/12(Sun)21:22 No.18292700
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    If you would: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PQEardkh-2I

    The team winces and contemplates popcorn as the two super-cybered, hardcore cop corp mercs go completely apeshit on the hapless runner. They both start with their stunsticks, but then one starts using the butt of the stunstick, and then the other pulls his sidearm and starts pistol-whipping the guy, and it just kind of goes downhill from there. Soon they're working the poor fucker over with just their bare fists, strewing teeth and bits of face all over the sidewalk. The pedestrians scream and run away as the two Knight Errant stand, wiping the blood off of their boots...

    And then the spirit hits them with another Suggestion each and they start going to town on the guy's cyberlegs with every hard object available. One of them goes back to the police interceptor and gets a tire iron while the other cracks a kneecap over the curb. The two of them mutually hallucinate that the nearest dumpster is a jail cell, and with a gleeful drawl of "boom 'em, boys," from the Man Spirit, the cops pick the dude up bodily, hurl him into the dumpster, slam the lid shut, handcuff the lid handles to each other, and then split for motherfucking donuts with a high-five.
    >> Anonymous 03/11/12(Sun)21:25 No.18292733
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    alas I have no pictures of badass people fistbumping
    >> Anonymous 03/11/12(Sun)21:28 No.18292774
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    Holy shit.
    >> Anonymous 03/11/12(Sun)21:35 No.18292885
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    well shit I gotta roll into bed now or my brain will leak outta my nose.
    hopefully the thread is here tomorrow
    >> TwoDee !qQigT1sixA 03/11/12(Sun)21:40 No.18292941
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    >flea market

    I am a cavalcade of misspellings today.


    His lip pursed in appreciation, 2D began to clap for Geppetto. The Spirit materialized in the view of the nearest security camera, bowed, and disappeared, its services to Geppetto fulfilled.

    With the flea market cleared out, it was a simple matter for Tank to snap the handcuffs, toss the broken sammy over his shoulder, and return to the stepvan.

    Now, we had a problem. There were two places we could interrogate this guy. One was 2D's place, which had a giant glass facade in front and no basement, but the right atmosphere. That was ruled out, because it was too exposed. The one remaining option was Geppetto's basement, but Geppetto happened to be living with Arianna the adorable 8-year-old, and she would probably not take kindly to brutal torture and/or information extraction.
    >> TwoDee !qQigT1sixA 03/11/12(Sun)21:41 No.18292954
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    No worries, if someone else doesn't archive it I will.


    Thinking quick on his feet, 2D connected to Geppetto's sedan and transferred Geppetto, Tank, and the captive sammy from the van to the car. Then, washing the blood from the floor of the stepvan, he called up Geppetto's house.

    Arianna: "Hello?"

    2D: "Hey, Arianna, it's uncle Stuart!" (2D's fake SIN's identity was Stuart Pot, local mechanic and 20cen pop music enthusiast)

    Arianna: "Hey, uncle Stuart! When are you, uncle Vito, and uncle Garret going to be back?"

    2D: "About that, sweetie. Uncle Garret isn't going to be in for a while, but your brother and uncle Vito need the house for a while, so your Aunt Jozie and I are taking you to FUNLAND!"

    Arianna: *girlish screams* "Can I bring my friends!?"

    2D: "You can bring all of them!"

    2D picked up Jozie, his orc juggalo girlfriend, briefed her on the situation (she just liked being able to go somewhere fun), and, in a position any of his 4Chan buddies would have killed for, picked up five prepubescent girls in an unmarked grey van.
    >> TwoDee !qQigT1sixA 03/11/12(Sun)21:51 No.18293071
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    2D left his comms open. As the hostage came to, in a dark basement, unable to feel his legs, with an elf in a suit and a troll in armor (both in balaclavas) standing in front of him, he wondered first and foremost why the commlink placed on a nearby table was playing the sound of little girls shrieking on carnival rides.

    Already off to an awkward start, Geppetto stripped the guy naked, and found himself gawking at the street sammy's gargantuan elephant dong. This was larger than porn star huge. This was bigger than "compensating for something" huge. It was down to his knees. Geppetto instinctively stepped to the side for fear that there was a cybergun of submachine gun or larger caliber hidden in this tube steak.

    He had a stupidly huge dick, is what I'm saying.

    There was a brief pause as all involved tried to take in the pure, consolidated weird of the situation, punctuated by 2D bitching about shitty cotton candy over the comms.

    Geppetto opened up.

    "Who are you working penis? OH GOD DAMMIT."
    >> Anonymous 03/11/12(Sun)21:51 No.18293080
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    >> Anonymous 03/11/12(Sun)21:56 No.18293118
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    I LOL'd and I'm off to bed too. You, Anon, are awesome!
    >> Anonymous 03/11/12(Sun)21:57 No.18293133

    This better not end in shitting dick nipples.
    >> Anonymous 03/11/12(Sun)22:03 No.18293190
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    >> TwoDee !qQigT1sixA 03/11/12(Sun)22:12 No.18293268
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    Gah, shit's coming up so I may have to call it quits for an hour or two soon.

    The street sammy clammed up almost instantaneously, as much stubborn as he was weirded out by the whole ordeal. Frustrated, Geppetto announced into the commlink,

    Geppetto: "2D? Anything you wanna suggest before we resort to violence on this guy?"


    Tank: "I don't like this."


    Tank: "What? No."


    Tank: "Ewww. Okay, there's this little thing that looks like a headphone jack right near his balls."

    Sammy: "What are you doing to my dick?"

    Geppetto: "Shut up!"


    Tank: "I'm not plugging my commlink into this guy's dick! I don't know where he's been!"

    2D: "GEPPETTO?"

    Geppeto (sighing): "Do it, Tank."


    Tank: "WHAT DID YOU DOOOO!?"

    Geppetto: "2D, why is my captive's dick sparking and doing loop-de-loops?"

    2D: "TEACUP RIDE!"

    With that, 2D hung up.
    >> Anonymous 03/11/12(Sun)22:15 No.18293301
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    >> Anonymous 03/11/12(Sun)22:17 No.18293315
    The closest I have come to playing Shadowrun is the video games, maybe read a couple of books but thats it.

    The mix of Cyberpunk and fantasy interest me in so many way.
    >> TwoDee !qQigT1sixA 03/11/12(Sun)22:23 No.18293374
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    Geppetto called 2D back.


    2D: "IT'S IN HIS DICK!"

    2D hung up again, having learned the valuable lesson that the marketing isn't all bullshit, and sometimes dreams do come true at funland. When security picked him up for hacking the teacup ride, he paid the (comparatively paltry) fine with a smile on his face, and an announcement of "nothing you can tell me will make me sorry, but I will gladly apologize anyway."

    So, confronted with terminal levels of weird, the sammy finally spilled his guts. There were two guys leading this operation; a hacker named Two-Times, who came from some sort of black ops background, and an elf physad named Joy, his longtime partner. Two-Times had some kind of obsessive-compulsive duality gimmick, hence the two vehicles, the digital and magical concealment, and the fact that (as we learned) he had eight teammates but split them into two teams.
    >> TwoDee !qQigT1sixA 03/11/12(Sun)22:27 No.18293403
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    2D, sitting boredly in the theme park security office, begins to mash the gears together, and realizes that the captive sammy is probably on Two-Times' tacnet.

    So, working on the assumption of "two backups, always," he checked the node space above Geppetto's home. He found a fly-spy surveillance drone. With a grunt of "cheeky bastard," he zonked in his chair to begin hacking it.

    The drone was child's play.

    The skeleton code, stripped and replaced with a lethal feedback databomb, wasn't.

    With an ear-splitting scream, 2D began bleeding from his ears and collapsed onto the pavement of Funland.

    And with that, I'll call the story till later tonight, since I've got to move. If you guys can keep the thread alive, I'll pick it up in the same thread; if not, I'll start a new one.
    >> Anonymous 03/11/12(Sun)23:38 No.18294058
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    >> TwoDee !qQigT1sixA 03/12/12(Mon)00:09 No.18294356
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    Did someone say "More, OP?"

    Yes, I do believe someone did.

    More incoming.
    >> TwoDee !qQigT1sixA 03/12/12(Mon)00:19 No.18294454
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    Meanwhile, across the city, in the trauma ward of Seattle General a pair of cybereyes blinked open, and with a SNAP, a surgeon went missing. Doctor Dervish retrieved his duffel bag full of gear (generously unsearched) and, with a cursory glance back at the crisp white hallways of the hospital, he was gone into the night.

    Geppetto got a call.

    Geppetto: "Dervish, what the fuck? You should be in the hospital!"
    Dervish: "Mage. I need a trajectory on the pursuit of the hostage in Everett."
    Geppetto: "Dervish, I think 2D is down and--"
    Dervish: "Where are they, Geppetto?"
    Geppetto: "...I sent some watcher spirits to tail them. They've mostly been dying, though. Their mage is good."
    Dervish: "A direction, mage."
    Geppetto: "Uh...South. Dervish, what's happening? You're--"

    Dervish hung up, and made his own call.

    Dervish: "Hello, Seattle Tacoma? I'd like to report a bomb threat."
    >> TwoDee !qQigT1sixA 03/12/12(Mon)00:26 No.18294516
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    TwoDee awoke on the streets of Funland with DocWagon paramedics standing over him, holding a defibrilator and a fuckton of stims. The Resonance was hazy for him, considering he'd been briefly in a coma, but he was able to loosely recognize a few messages from Geppetto buzzing in his vision. While still flat on the pavement, he connected his AR shades and rang up Geppetto.

    2D: "H3Y G3PP3TT0 WH4T'S UP"

    Geppetto: "Um...wow. I'm getting some kind of distortion here. You feeling alright?"

    2D: "0H 1 D0N'T KN0W MY BR41N JUST W3NT TH3 W4Y 0F THR33 M1L3 1SL4ND, CH3RN0BYL 0R CH1C4G0 1F 1'M B31NG G3N3R0US BUT 0TH3R TH4N TH4T 1'M G00D 1 GU3SS. N0T L1K3 1 4LM0ST D13D 0R 4NYTH1NG."

    Geppetto: "How long is this going to last?"

    2D: "PR0B4BLY L1K3 F1FT33N M1NUT3S N0W G3T T0 TH3 FUCK1NG P01NT."

    Geppetto: "So Dervish called."

    2D: "W4T."

    Geppetto: "And he was going...what's south of Everett?"

    2D: "FUCK!"

    Geppetto: "What's south of Everett that I'm missing, 2D!?"

    2D: "G3T 1N Y0UR FUCK1NG C4R R1GHT N0W, 1'M H4CK1NG TH3 C0NTR0LS."
    >> Anonymous 03/12/12(Mon)00:30 No.18294555
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    Go on.

    Also can we milk another session's worth of story out of you

    I fucking love ShadowRun, and I don't see anywhere near as many stories as I would like about it.

    Also, is this SR3 or 4?
    >> Anonymous 03/12/12(Mon)00:37 No.18294626
    Damn, you guys seem to be getting buttfucked pretty hard this game. A lot worse than the previous ones.
    >> TwoDee !qQigT1sixA 03/12/12(Mon)00:41 No.18294666
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    2D continued,

    "H3'S G01NG T0 TH3 41RP0RT. TH3 K1DN4PP3RS KN0W TH3 H34T 1S 0N S0 TH3Y'R3 FL331NG TH3 UC4S."

    The team beat a hasty rendezvous in which 2D, driving both vehicles simultaneously, arranged for his girlfriend Jozie to take all the little girls home and to then take Arianna to the Fucking 4Chan Juggalo Wind Farm (tm) for safety (I know, irony). The rest of the team hauled ass toward Sea-Tac in the rigger van.

    2D called up Dervish and got no response, so feeling particularly desperate, he searched out Dervish's commlink's node, somewhere on the runway of the airport. Wait, not the runway. Was he...was he...ON TOP of the control tower?

    Bouncing into his backdoor into Dervish's cybereyes, 2D found himself staring down a pair of crosshairs. Dervish blinked reflexively, and spoke, such that his own sensorium would hear him, thus broadcasting to 2D.

    Dervish: "Hello, Hacker. You have arrived just in time to witness me doing our job. Do you see that congregation in hangar C, Hacker?"

    Dervish: "They have foolishly left the hangar doors open. This allowed me to recognize the man who shot me in the head. I very much intend to return the favor."

    2D scrolled text across Dervish's eyes.

    2D: "Dervish, dude, we can talk about this-"

    Dervish: "Target sighted. Breathe."


    Shortly after the sniper went sprawling, headless from the nose up, across the tarmac, the crosshairs leveled over the enemy primary street samurai, scrambling for cover at the death of the sniper.

    Dervish: "Target sighted. Breathe."

    2D: "SERIOUSLY--"

    The street sammy dropped like a rock with a burst of pink mist.
    >> Dorfboots !!6qujI7jhvLR 03/12/12(Mon)00:51 No.18294769
    Another thread! Welcome back TwoDee!
    >> TwoDee !qQigT1sixA 03/12/12(Mon)00:51 No.18294773
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    SR4. And I'll keep going till the end of this run, at the very least.


    At this point the GM had stopped pulling punches. He let us know that we were walking into a fully adaptable, enemy-controlled situation and he'd be treating things as such.


    Dervish planted one in another hired muscle before the rest of the rival team had scrambled to close the hangar doors. In the rigger van, 2D screeched in panic and floored it toward the airport, grossly violating the speed limit.

    Back in netspace, 2D noticed through Dervish's eyes as the dying street samurai and thug began levitating towards the remaining crack of the hangar doors. Without a second thought, he sighted their heads, and planted a second shot in each. There would be no healing on his watch. The deed done, and without any remaining advantage from sniping, he activated Trout's tacsuit (which 2D had not noticed he was wearing) and rappelled to the tarmac below.
    >> Dorfboots !!6qujI7jhvLR 03/12/12(Mon)00:55 No.18294813
    If anyone gives the word, I'll continue my story as well. Otherwise I'll leave the typing to TwoDee.
    >> Anonymous 03/12/12(Mon)00:59 No.18294855
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    Do Continue, TwoDee.

    >Have I told you lately, that I love you?
    >> TwoDee !qQigT1sixA 03/12/12(Mon)01:02 No.18294881
         File: 1331528537.jpg-(918 KB, 1100x1320, 1288760350824.jpg)
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    RUN FINALE MUSIC: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=famTTjPYb8o

    2D, Geppetto, and Tank arrived at the airport to find it swarming with Knight Errant, due to the high profile bomb threat. Before they could get on the tarmac, Knight Errant stopped the team, demanding clearance. 2D hastily bullshitted up some fake digital clearances for himself and Geppetto, but the troll with the LMG (and a REAL SIN, which couldn't be modified on the fly) was not going to fly. Thinking on his feet, Geppetto summoned a Spirit of Man to drive one of the Knights postal.

    During the ensuring spree shooting, 2D was able to floor it onto the tarmac, albeit not in a subtle fashion. On the way in, the stepvan was buzzed by a military landing chopper, en route for the very hangar that they were rushing towards. It was jet-black, unmarked. This was some serious shit.

    That last sentence was all but confirmed as a squad of Ares Knight Errant, in full hotzone loadout gear, poured out of the helicopter, battle rifles readied. They breached the hangar, and then...there was a suspicious lack of gunfire.

    The team knew that they'd been hired by Ares, though, and Firewatch was the best of the best, so this was a good thing, right?

    Imagine our surprise when the hangar opened again, and we saw a prop plane with thick armor plating making its way to the runway...escorted by the commando team.
    >> TwoDee !qQigT1sixA 03/12/12(Mon)01:07 No.18294929
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    Dervish: "This doesn't make sense. You can't bribe Firewatch."

    2D worked it out first.


    Geppetto: "What!?"


    Dervish approached the plane.

    Dervish: "The mission is still on."


    Dervish, standing further down the runway, seemed to have a brief seizure. As he blinked rapidly, a tone of softness seemed to return to his voice.

    Dervish: "Oh. Oh fuck."

    Activating his skimmers, Dervish boosted back to the van as fast as he could go, recognizing the mortal danger that the team was suddenly in.
    >> Anonymous 03/12/12(Mon)01:10 No.18294961
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    Wat. Oh noes.
    >> Anonymous 03/12/12(Mon)01:14 No.18295004
    >I'm about to go to sleep
    >Sleep is for pussies
    >> TwoDee !qQigT1sixA 03/12/12(Mon)01:14 No.18295010
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    The team voted to reconvene at Geppetto's place. Or, rather, Geppetto, Tank, and Dervish voted for that. 2D wanted to flee to the sewers and never come out again.

    2D: "This is so fucked, this is so fucked, seriously, Tank, leave your shit, we need to get out of here."

    Tank: "I left my backup guns in Geppetto's house! I gotta get 'em back!"


    2D dove into the nearest dumpster (the second time this saved him from danger in his life) as Tank opened the front door, and was promptly blasted back across the street by the resultant house-shattering explosion. Ares Knight-Errant sirens lit up the night, closing fast.


    Tank was rather the worse for wear at this point, but all things considered it was probably for the best that it was the big dumb troll who opened the door, since he was the only one who wouldn't have been put critical by the explosion. He was dropped in the nearest sewer entrance and, as per 2D's suggestion, the team went dark, separated into different parts of town, and dropped into different areas of the sewers one at a time.

    2D was the last one, so he had no idea what he was dealing with when he entered the sewers.

    Namely, he didn't expect the Firewatch team that would be waiting for him, ordering him to kneel on the floor or die.
    >> TwoDee !qQigT1sixA 03/12/12(Mon)01:22 No.18295089
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    As the team, all of whom had been captured individually, were lined up against a wall beneath a storm drain, an Ares agent walked through the ranks of Firewatch, who were organized with disturbing similarity to a firing squad. The agent smiled grimly, and explained the situation to the team.

    Both teams had been hired on by legitimate Ares authorities. These two authorities just happened to be involved in an interdepartmental conflict. The agent reprimanded us; we had been captured by the faction that we'd been hired by, but imagine if we'd been so foolish as to get captured by the faction we were running against? Why, we'd probably be dead in the sewers right now.

    Now, here was the deal. Mr. Wilkins was part of a pivotal conflict against Mr. Bradford Nice's department. This was part of a much larger conflict between heads Damien Knight and Arthur Vogel. Mr. Nice had organized the kidnapping of Mr. Wilkins' daughter, to better grease the wheels of reintegration into the local Ares branch.

    There was, however, a loose end.

    Pluton the scottish terrier.
    >> TwoDee !qQigT1sixA 03/12/12(Mon)01:28 No.18295138
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    You see, one talented and rather infamous shadowrunner by the name of Two-Times had decided that, upon delivering the girl to safety, he wanted to keep Pluton the dog. This would not normally have been a problem, but Pluton was no ordinary scotty. He was a biodrone, a "data dog" as per Ein from cowboy bebop, and he had some rather...potent Ares company secrets on him. It was unknown whether Two-Times wanted the dog for this data, or just as an attack against Ares, but this was quite the blow.

    And, as it just so happened, Ares had found some Shadowrunners that had a bone to pick with Mr. Two-Times.

    Namely, us.

    We had two options:

    (1) Find Two-Times, kill him, and retrieve the dog, and in the process be richly rewarded with millions of nuyen.

    (2) Be ignominiously summary-executed in a sewer in Auburn.

    It took a little thought, but we went with option (1).
    >> Dorfboots !!6qujI7jhvLR 03/12/12(Mon)01:31 No.18295172
    By the way, I was the guy with the
    >covered in a fine mist of lube and semen
    >> Anonymous 03/12/12(Mon)01:33 No.18295181
    I loved that one. Maybe start up when TwoDee gets done? Overlapping stories can get confusing.
    >> TwoDee !qQigT1sixA 03/12/12(Mon)01:34 No.18295190
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    Ares generously gave us what little intel they had on Joy, Two-Times' partner in crime. Namely, that he was known to be a compulsively big spender in Vegas, and he had just made tens of thousands of nuyen from the kidnap job. So, that was where we were going first, and we had a day to say goodbye to our contacts in Seattle. Off to find a disguise adept in the City of Sin.

    With that, I'll call it for the night, since I need to do some app work. I'll stick around as per the usual to answer questions, though, and I can give you a pretty good ETA on Shadowrun Storytime 5. Namely, sometime in the afternoon/evening tomorrow.
    >> TwoDee !qQigT1sixA 03/12/12(Mon)01:36 No.18295205

    Also, this does mean that Dorfboots can take it away with impunity.
    >> Anonymous 03/12/12(Mon)01:36 No.18295214
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    I also enjoyed said story, and feel overlapping stories would conflict. Also, I'm on the edge of my seat here wondering about that damn dog.

    >> Anonymous 03/12/12(Mon)01:37 No.18295217
    Well it looks like it is your turn now friend.
    >> Dorfboots !!6qujI7jhvLR 03/12/12(Mon)01:39 No.18295241

    > [x] The Heist
    >> TwoDee !qQigT1sixA 03/12/12(Mon)01:44 No.18295282
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    Also belated <3 for this anon.
    >> Dorfboots !!6qujI7jhvLR 03/12/12(Mon)01:54 No.18295386
    So, after they threw the captured thugs out of a high-rise, the NeoTokyo Reapers (the team was dubbed as such by the DM, later renamed to The Wicked) the Johnson sent them off. Tom slept in his truck, Hiro went to his apartment (read: cubicle), and the others fucked off. Later that evening, as a reward, they were invited to a fancy restaurant by the Johnson. So everyone shows up, and eats. But wait. The restaurant is run by some mind-mage guy with a karma count through the roof. And it has a network. And Hiro has Black Hat as his paragon.

    Black Hat technomancers have to resist hacking into interesting nodes. Hiro fails to resist, and cracks in in under a minute as he eats. DM isn't happy. Hiro finds a node filled with ancient recipes the place is famous for. DM is less happy. Hiro transcribes the data, and we GTFO.
    >> TwoDee !qQigT1sixA 03/12/12(Mon)01:57 No.18295422
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    Certain technomancer paragons are a bitch. 2D is a Daedalus techno, which means that he overmodifies his drones and vehicles to the point where other people have trouble using them, but that's not especially punishing when the team doesn't have any backup riggers.

    The really punishing paragon is Shooter, who doesn't let you back down from a fight. Imagine how quickly you'd die if you weren't allowed to jack out of a cybercombat!


    >mfw this thread isn't even over and it's purple on the archives
    >> Dorfboots !!6qujI7jhvLR 03/12/12(Mon)02:10 No.18295530
    With the stolen data in tow, they meet via matrix, and sit around, discussing what to do. They need need cash for PROJECTS, so Hiro starts up his botnet of rating one agents called 4chan, and seeds info on a black auction throughout the Matrix.

    Three days later, the group is several million nuyen richer, and invited to another party. Tom and Hiro ar paranoid, so they sit in Hiro's armored sedan while the slut-mage and a kid (forgettable player, only in for that session and the next) go in. Prep for the main course begins, and ten minutes later, the kitchen is violently glowing
    >> Dorfboots !!6qujI7jhvLR 03/12/12(Mon)02:11 No.18295549
    Two sessions ago, Hiro yelled at him to get serious. Was very funny.
    >> Dorfboots !!6qujI7jhvLR 03/12/12(Mon)02:19 No.18295609
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    As it turns out, these recipes were also hilariously powerful summoning rituals. But we had the slut-mage read them over to see if they were safe.
    So, Hiro and Tom barely get the two out of there, and the mind-mage chef passes us on the way out. Later the team sees on the news feed that the restaurant they were invited to the second time has exploded, with many casualties.
    >> Dorfboots !!6qujI7jhvLR 03/12/12(Mon)02:26 No.18295667
    This is when we figured out that the DM was really gunning to take out Hiro, because this is when J and The Dwarf were introduced. But that is another story in
    > [ ] The Mecha
    > [ ] The Rivals

    Sorry if this one was short. I fell asleep that session because insomnia, and it really is just setting up for the next stories. I'll tell both of them in the next thread.
    >> TwoDee !qQigT1sixA 03/12/12(Mon)02:27 No.18295676
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    That'll be tomorrow in the late afternoon PST, for your edification.
    >> Anonymous 03/12/12(Mon)02:30 No.18295700
    The Mecha
    >> Dorfboots !!6qujI7jhvLR 03/12/12(Mon)02:31 No.18295707
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    Thanks man.
    >> Anonymous 03/12/12(Mon)02:49 No.18295859

    (really, thanks for the stories)
    >> Anonymous 03/12/12(Mon)12:08 No.18299354
    I'll give this'n a free bump so I can see it tomorrow.
    >> Anonymous 03/12/12(Mon)17:00 No.18301770
    Aaaand second free bump.

    ShadowRun is best run.

    Anyone know someone who runs SR3? I want to play it. A lot.

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