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  • File: 1329428209.png-(15 KB, 669x338, Crawl_Screenshot.png)
    15 KB Transpace Guard Quest B12: Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/16/12(Thu)16:36 No.17978601  
    On a level of reality just below our own,
    Wait. I've already told you that, haven't I?

    Here's the setting in brief, for people who are new:
    Every fictional setting is real, and this set of a billion or more fictional worlds makes up the Meta. A good half of these worlds are plagued by Mary Sues, Fixers, Fanfiction writers, and Crossovers.
    Your organisation, the Transpace Guard, is dedicated to cleaning up and removing these intrusions upon other people's stories, preserving the Canon. This involves kicking large amounts of ass AND also chewing large amounts of bubblegum.
    The section of the Transpace Guard that you work for is called Requistions. To be more precise? Requisitions - Looting. It's your job to go around stealing everything that ISN'T important to the canon, and selling it back to your organisation for DOSH.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/16/12(Thu)16:38 No.17978627
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    The players have looted two worlds successfully so far:

    The first, a Dating Sim world gone wrong when a smelly, obese neckbeard found a way to bring women through the Meta to him and mind control them into servitude, leaving many canons without some of their main characters.
    You went in, picked up everything that wasn't nailed down, and got out.

    The second, Black Mesa from Half-Life. The G-man was too busy playing Quake 3 Arena, and relied on you, Transpace Guard operatives, to fill plotholes and loot everything that wasn't nailed down. You proceeded to do so.

    Now, the players are in their 3rd world: A Dungeon Crawl Stone Soup run. Thus far, they have defeated the Dwarf Fortress crossover, and have looted the Lair, Snake, Shoals, Slime Pits, Dungeons down to D:18, and Vaults down to Vault:7.
    Most of the DOSH you'll earn from this mission comes from capturing enemy creatures alive, though items are worth picking up as well. Do this for as many creatures as possible, then head back to base to get paid.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/16/12(Thu)16:40 No.17978654
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    The players' loadout is as follows:

    As Support options, the players have acquired:
    >Heavy Teleport Support, TG-made
    Teleports up and down 10m x 10m x 10m cubes of material every 30 seconds, or person-sized objects every 3 seconds. Requires line of sight to a ground troop or a deployable beacon to work.
    Electrified Steel Nets for the Teleport Support
    >Instant Revitalization Device from Earthbound
    Touch it, and instantly get the benefits of a good night's sleep
    >An Alien Containment from X-com
    Stores the creatures you stun/disable.
    >Recette from Recettear
    3% bonus to DOSH earned
    >Skyranger from X-com
    Equipped with meta transit drive.

    As Troops on the ground, the players have acquired:
    >2 Competent 10-man Warcraft Teams
    They have been given stun "staves" to use on enemies in melee combat.
    >The Mentor from Orcs Must Die!
    He is equipped with various Warcraft 3 Aura items, for +10% damage dealt, +10% runspeed, +5% attack speed, and +100% mana regeneration to nearby troops.
    He is equipped with Diablo II Magic Find and Gold Find gear, to allow him to build more traps.
    He has a Staff of Negation to spam AoE dispels on enemy summons.
    He has completed his Freeze Solid spell, which works to capture the Undead, Golems, and other non-fleshy things you encounter. Particularily strong creatures must first be weakened by smacking them around a bit first.
    He is now putting experience towards his Nonlethal Traps.

    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/16/12(Thu)16:44 No.17978695
    >A Blastoise from Pokemon
    Modified so that its cannons fire Holy water instead of normal water.
    It knows Holy surf, Holy water spout, Blizzard, and Focus blast.
    It is carrying a 200 kilogram anti-magic gem, which blocks nearby teleports reliably, and unreliably dispels other magic effects. It can be turned off and on, but not applied selectively.
    It is carrying a Grounding Belt for Lightning immunity, and a +50% damage to the undead mask.
    >1 Hero Auror, named Peter Perigree, from the Harry Potterverse
    As a custom hero, his traits are as follows:
    Master of the Arts: Peter is skilled at learning spells from other canons, and can learn a potentially infinite amount of spells.
    Loot Magnet: Peter is skilled at looting shit, and can equip many more items than a standard Auror.

    In addition to his Harry Potter spells, he has learned:
    Clairvoyance, Detect Objects, Detect Monsters, Detect Unseen, and Charm Monster from Nethack,
    "Totalum Requiscat", a custom TG spell that Accios everything in Line of Sight,
    He is equipped with a Mana Shield (take damage to MP instead of HP, if MP > HP)
    He is wearing a crapload of Diablo II Fast cast rate / Mana regen gear, WoW Spellpower / Int gear, and Crawl Wizardry gear.

    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/16/12(Thu)16:47 No.17978748
    The Auror is currently holding your BAG OF LOOTING, a bag of holding capable of holding every piece of random crap you pick up in the dungeon.

    >Max, from MDK 2
    Able to fire 4 weapons at once, to a high degree of accuracy.
    Robotic construction, but can still drink booze and smoke cigars.
    He is equipped with 4 TMAR Small Launchers, a fusion of Serious Sam and X-com technology, that each fire Stun bombs at a rate of 90 rounds per minute and never run out of ammo.
    He is carrying 2 TMAR Tau Cannons, a fusion of Serious Sam and Half-life technology, that fire powerful beams of subatomic particles that can pierce walls. He is not using them at the moment.
    He is wearing Fire Mail from Chrono Trigger, an item that makes any Fire damage you take heal you instead of hurt you. He is abusing this to consistently overcharge his TMAR weaponry and heal himself from the overheating.
    He is wearing a Life Gem from Warcraft III, that doubles his HP.
    He is wearing Increased Attack Speed, +damage, and Faster Run Speed gear from Diablo II.
    >A Minecrafter, from Minecraft
    He is equipped with a large amount of Gems from Diablo II, and Pickaxes/Axes made from these.
    He has made himself a set of Ruby armor, which grants him +life, and an Amethyst sword, which has an increased chance of hitting.
    He is carrying buckets of Lava. How he does that without burning his hands is unknown.
    He is also carrying a large amount of Wood, Rock and Iron.
    He is carrying a Unicorn Horn from Nethack, an item that lets you cure ability drains, poison, sickness, confusion and hallucination by touching someone with it.
    >1 Cleric of Desna, from Pathfinder
    Currently level 10.
    Provides buffing spells, allows a limited amount of rerolling, and hits things in the face with a metal stick.
    She is wearing some low level Diablo II survivability gear.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/16/12(Thu)16:50 No.17978781
    I forgot that Peter Perigree, your Auror, is also equipped with the Eye of the Aethiopica, an artefact from Nethack that he earned when he transitioned to Hero.

    Your players' LOOTED ITEMS is as follows (the monsters are NOT charmed, and are presumably hostile if you release them):




    LAIR BRANCH DONE, D:18 done, Orc:4 done, Hive done, Vault:7 done.
    Jiyva (? DOSH)
    >Looting gods: Fun and profitable
    A bunch of random crappy monsters (950 DOSH)
    100 Slime Creature (500)
    24 Acid Blob (480)
    13 Stone Giant (325)
    >Success in resolving the crossover (300)
    16 Yaktaur Captain (240)
    15 Azure Jelly (150)
    10 Greater Naga (150)
    7 Hydrae (140)
    The Royal Jelly (100)
    9 Merfolk >implier (90)
    3 Fire Giant (75)
    3 Kraken (75)
    7 Siren (70)
    6 Dire Elephant (60)
    5 Merfolk Javelineer (50)
    3 Merfolk Aquamancer (45)
    4 Deep Elf Knight (40)
    2 Dragon (40)
    2 Ice Dragon (40)
    2 Iron Troll (40)
    8 Oklob Plant (40)
    4 Orc high priest (40)
    1 Lich (35)
    7 Shining Eye (35)
    6 Hell knight (30)
    4 Eye of Draining (20)
    1 Orc Warlord (20)
    2 Wizard (20)
    1 Alligator Snapping Turtle (15)
    3 Death Yak (15)
    1 Deep Elf Sorcerer (15)
    3 Hill Giant (15)
    3 Rock Troll (15)
    3 Spiny Worm (15)
    2 Boring Beetle (10)
    2 Great Orb of Eyes (10)
    2 Necromancer (10)
    1 Very Ugly Thing (10)
    1 Giant Orange Brain (5)
    1 Fire Crab (5)

    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/16/12(Thu)16:52 No.17978805
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    Frederick (35)
    Nikola (35)
    Mennas (35)
    Xtahua (35)
    Wiglaf (30)
    Ilsuiw (25)
    Kirke (25)
    Roxanne (25)
    Rupert (25)
    Aizul (20)
    Azrael (20)
    Donald (20)
    Frances (20)
    Maud (20)
    Dissolution (15)
    Gastronok (15)
    Polyphemus (15)
    Erica (10)
    Joseph (10)
    Nergalle (10)
    Nessos (10)
    Urug (10)
    Blork (5)
    Psyche (5)
    Purgy (5)
    Sigmund (5)

    Random dungeoncrap (395 DOSH)
    33 Unique Spellbooks (165)
    11 Glorious Artefacts (110)
    3 Runes of Zot (75)
    30 Zot Traps (75)
    19 Royal Jellies (38)
    1 Scroll of Acquirement (10)
    1 Scroll of Torment
    1 Scroll of Holy Word

    Phew. recap complete.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/16/12(Thu)16:57 No.17978880
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    Also, your Skyranger is equipped with a SENSOR PACKAGE equivalent to late-20th century technology.

    The players have access to COMMON SENSE.
    If you make a retarded suggestion that would completely fuck you over, you lose a bulb of COMMON SENSE, but that action is prevented.
    If you make an ingenious and creative suggestion that would allow you to bypass much difficulty, you gain a bulb of COMMON SENSE.
    If you earn a bulb of COMMON SENSE when your bulbs are already full, you SUPERCHARGE a bulb. Supercharge all of your bulbs to earn upgrades to your common sense!

    Currently, your common sense loadout is:
    >Extra Bulb 2
    You have 2 extra bulbs on top of the standard 3
    >Red 2
    Whenever you would normally supercharge 1 bulb, you instead supercharge 3
    >Green 1
    Your bulbs start Green. A bulb will turn from Green to Yellow and upgrade actions automatically, if a small adjustment (that you should have thought of) will turn a plan from OK into Good, or Good into Great.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/16/12(Thu)17:19 No.17979149
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    Since it's normally an hour before the game begins, I'll start up some random writing.

    Kept a tight hold of by the Transpace Guard's top secret division, called "Black ops", this deployable item can be deployed to drain the creative essence, or 'soul' of a story. It is only available to Black ops.

    Even its existence is kept secret to the rest of the Transpace Guard, for fear of information about it leaking out to those who are untrustworthy.

    It is used in the manufacture of several important Meta technologies:
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/16/12(Thu)17:27 No.17979226
    Essence #1: Essence of Reality
    Though not the strongest creative essence, easily the most common - this is obtained from almost everywhere that reality happens, and in a vast majority of cases, draining a story will get you more Essence of Reality than any other essence.

    This Essence ensures that grass grows, water flows downhill, fire is hot, and bullets to the head kill you. By packing it inside appropriately-sized containers, one obtains the so-called "Reality Emitters" that have proved very useful to the Guard in the past.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/16/12(Thu)17:32 No.17979271
    Essence #2: Essence of Plot
    A Schizophrenic essence and hard to use, but not hostile, and the 2nd most common. Plot often argues with itself - who's the hero, who's the underdog, is this the part where the bad guy falls, or where the hero is conquered and has a setback he must recover from?
    Because of this, Essence of Plot is hard to use, but Black ops have found a way.
    By shoving enough Essence of Plot into a single universe and "crumpling" it, Black ops have found a way to make the power of Plot Strong, but not internally coherent, so it obeys statistical averages about certain plot elements and what happens in stories.

    This crumpled universe is then packed into a casing known as a Rewriter Bomb - a device to unleash the concentrated power of Plot upon a setting.
    However, Rewriter Bombs have a mind of their own. They like the epic climax - where the hero is fighting for his life against hordes of incoming enemies, and survives only by the skin of his teeth at the very last seconds.
    Thus, Rewriter Bombs tend to be only effective when deployed straight in the middle of the hornet's nest, with tons of S.U.E. forces up your ass. Rewriter Bombs are kind of dicks.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/16/12(Thu)17:39 No.17979347
    Essence #3: Essence of Power
    Many settings have a coherent theme of "A wizard did it", or "The force", or "It's magic I ain't gotta explain shit".
    These are typically used as energy sources for bases, spaceships, or magical devices. They are greatly coveted items by our rival factions, and so are NOT handed out directly to Editors or Looters, but only to those who handle high-tier bases and spaceships.

    Essence #4: Essence of Plothole
    An Error in a story.
    A Glitch in the matrix.
    A Hole, from which one thing jumps ahead a few chapters.
    A lot of research has been done on trying to use the Essence of Plothole. Currently, our best bet is the line of things referred to as Meta Transit Drives - devices which open a Plothole in one canon, and a Plothole in another canon, then form a wormhole between the two for our ships to travel through.
    Currently, our navigation is entirely reliable unless jammed by enemy forces. It is STRONGLY recommended that you do not use a Meta Transit Drive that has been jammed.

    Essence #5: Essence of Bad Writing
    Also known as Essence of S.U.E.
    These are destroyed whenever we make one.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/16/12(Thu)17:49 No.17979430
    Item #: SCP-1892

    Object Class: Keter

    Special Containment Procedures:
    The item must always be adjacent to a Reality Emitter of greater size, in a solid block of strong magic and physical resistance, rated at a strength NO LESS than Adamantium for physical and Anti-Magic Void for magic.

    This block must then be placed in a room deep in Fractal Storage Site [______], the room itself encased in a DIFFERENT magic and physical resistant substance.

    The room is to have 9 Observation sites and 3 Airlocks. Each Observation site is to have a Reality emitter of at least Vehicle-class, and each Airlock is to have a reality emitter of at least Capital-class.

    3 separate teams are to guard the object at all times, and are NOT to be made known of each-others' existence. This is so we can check whether any one given team is "Falling" to SCP-1892's influence, and should be replaced immediately.

    Each team is to staff their 3 of the observation posts, and enter via their own airlock only. They are to check the observation posts' data between each-other, to verify if any one of the observation posts is out-of-synch with the others, and needs to be replaced.

    The observation posts are to monitor SCP-1892 at all times, and report any instances of "Grim" or "Dark" to special response teams immediately.

    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/16/12(Thu)17:57 No.17979504
    At least once per week, every physical item used in the observation posts and airlocks should be replaced. The prior items are to be inspected for any sign of "Grim" or "Dark" corruption, and be destroyed if necessary.

    At least once per week, every staff member working in SCP-1892's room is to be replaced. The prior staff are to undergo a thorough psychological investigation for any sign of "Grim" or "Dark" corruption, and be destroyed if necessary.

    If any member of personnel becomes aware of one of the other observation teams, he is immediately to be given Amnesiacs and transferred to another position.

    Finally, a Capital-grade reality emitter is to be placed at the entrance to SCP-1892's storage room, and a final "Master airlock" installed. The Airlock is to be staffed with extremely heavily armed (up to Capital class) guards at all times.

    Description: SCP-1892 is a "Grimdark Emitter", a device that emits the concentrated essence of Grimness and Darkness to all surrounding areas. Even with containment protocols this extensive, some Grimdark still seeps into Fractal storage facility [_____] - causing horrible monsters to roam its rarely-entered corridors.

    Some evidence exists that SCP-1892 may even exert influence over our own SCP archives. Many articles exist that are surprisingly accurate, descriptive, Grim, Dark, and Terrifying, and which have been written by personnel that we have never recorded having physical contact with the items that they are describing. If this is true, and SCP-1892 is able to effect even our off-world archives from such great enclosers, it may be changed from Keter class, to "Azathoth" class.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/16/12(Thu)18:07 No.17979627
    There are multiple instances of SCP-1892, ranging from Small (extraced from areas such as Little Red Riding Hood), all the way up to Apocalypse-class (extracted from [EXPUNGED] 40,000).
    Each of them is to be kept secure and monitored, and any new instances of SCP-1892 being extracted are to be stored in the same way.

    >Black Ops special notes
    >I don't care if you're an alpha+ researcher. I don't care if you're goddamn Grand High Admiral of all Transpace Forces. If we even SUSPECT you're stealing keter-class shit from us and we could POTENTIALLY get away with it, you'll have a bullet in your brainpan within 10 minutes.
    >For instance. Suppose you were to take a Keter-class object for monitored research, and it were to be "Lost under its own power". This on its own does not raise alarm bells because many Keter-class objects can do that.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/16/12(Thu)18:08 No.17979640
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    >But, if even WE, the top secret division, can find no trace of it leaving your area, any attempts to read your mind about it turn up blank, and you RENAME YOURSELF TO DR. MOTHERFUCKING "GRIMM", then that sets off huge alarm bells.
    >In fact, the ONLY reason you still draw breath at this moment, is that Black ops has a SPECIFIC ORDER not to terminate "irreplacable" personnel if they have no prior records, and we cannot directly prove their wrongdoing.
    >This is to prevent someone skilled at planting false evidence or filing false spec ops reports from using us as an Assassination-by-proxy service, but you, "Doctor", will be pleased to your know that your SPECIFIC case is the #1 reason why that directive is being reconsidered.
    >So, let it be known. We are keeping a VERY close eye on you. The only person higher on our watch list is the Shodan-Glados crossover that currently runs Requisitions' Human Resources division. And if we find even the slightest bit of evidence to prove what we KNOW you're doing with that emitter, we're feeding you to Wayrf. Got it? Good.
    >The rest of you: Don't steal our shit please. :)
    >> Anonymous 02/16/12(Thu)18:08 No.17979645
    I have a brilliant idea for us to deal with the Requisitions shutdown.

    We revisit the Darkness Beyond Time (where we got the Gurus) and recruit heroes from there. How we'll get there, is a matter of transit drive shenanigans, treknobabble, and probably VX system shenanigans as well.

    Knowing that, how many Homuras, Mamis, Kyoukos, Sayakas and Madokas we can recruit? lol.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/16/12(Thu)18:11 No.17979674
    So, Awating player input.

    Your forces are currently on Vault:7

    You have Max, a Hero Auror, a Blastoise, a Cleric of Desna, a Minecrafter, the Mentor, and 2 WoW teams.

    Where would you like to go?
    >Elf 1-5
    >Main dungeon
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/16/12(Thu)18:17 No.17979734
    Continuing to wait for player input.
    >> Anonymous 02/16/12(Thu)18:18 No.17979747
    Since making a separate planning thread is in bad taste, I'm posting the planning ideas here. There's a possibility, that we could ask other sectors for research data, or for any existing data to speed up our engineering plans for some hardware.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/16/12(Thu)18:19 No.17979754
    Very well.You may Metaquest Plan in here. It will at least give me bumps.
    what happened to yesterday's quest, anyway? I can't find it in the archive and it never showed up while I was refreshing the board.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/16/12(Thu)18:25 No.17979813
    Are all the players absent?

    Very well. I shall bump this thread occasionally and go play video games. Woo, videogames!
    >> Anonymous 02/16/12(Thu)18:26 No.17979826
    It didn't run.

    We have a team picked out for making contact with Light, and how they are to approach his outer perimeter, but there has been very little in the way of actual negotiation points and what we say to him.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/16/12(Thu)18:27 No.17979835
    Ah. Shame. I was quite looking forward to participating in it, even if my suggestions are mediocre.
    Still, mediocre beats Raidah.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/16/12(Thu)18:35 No.17979942
    Welp, time for videogames
    >> Codeki 02/16/12(Thu)18:42 No.17980009
    Yeah, I was dissapointed too. When I didn't see it running, I was at least hoping you'd run a bootleg quest.

    So, did Metaquest Op fill you in on that info via email?

    Also, just as a guess, SCP-1892 are SUEs, aren't they?
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/16/12(Thu)18:43 No.17980036
    They are grimdark emitters. Says so in their description.
    No, you cannot have one.
    However, the Transpace Guard might send some to your favourite fan characters as gifts.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/16/12(Thu)18:53 No.17980140
    Welp, seems nobody gives a shit about Bootleg.
    I'mma sleep. Cya lads.
    >> Anonymous 02/16/12(Thu)18:53 No.17980144
    *reads blurb on Transit Drive*

    Welp, the VX just became even more important, because it doesn't seem to exploit plot holes for it to work.

    >>Darkness Beyond Time

    Since this is a dumping ground for failed timelines, we could probably fish out resources here with little to no repercussions.
    >> Anonymous 02/16/12(Thu)19:07 No.17980312
    Alright, so no one has any idea on what to say to Light?
    No guidance for Star-Lord on his cover story, or what he's supposed to say to keep Light from filling the away team with bullet holes?

    I go to the trouble of putting together a team for you screw-ups, a well-thought out plan on how to ingress to the target location, and you don't even know what to say?
    >> Not completely retarded 02/16/12(Thu)19:08 No.17980325
    Apparently the guys on vault 8 use ranged a lot, so we may want to target them through transparent walls. If we remove all but the innermost centimeter or so of wall, put in a transparant section behind that, then remove that innermost centimeter, we could safely change the walls to transparant, allowing us to get line of sight easily.
    We could apply a similar strategy to the ceiling of a level, placing a large slab of transparant material over where we want a hole, then making a hole slightly smaller thn the transparant material to give us a window to target through.
    I don't see any antiteleport of vault 8, so let's do that first, since we're here and can make bulletproof windows now. (using the walls we looted)
    >> Anonymous 02/16/12(Thu)19:29 No.17980573
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    I'm sad that metaquest didn't transpire on Wednesday.

    I just hope MetaOP's house didn't burn down.

    But Bootlegquest is good too!
    >> Anonymous 02/16/12(Thu)19:51 No.17980790
    bumping for all the plans.

    all of them.
    >> Anonymous 02/16/12(Thu)21:17 No.17981709
    bumping, FOR GREAT JUSTICE
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/16/12(Thu)21:55 No.17982140
    You lads want a Stone Soup run?
    >> Anonymous 02/16/12(Thu)21:58 No.17982184

    I am... but I'm scared that I'll make stupid plans and not know stuff due to my relative ignorance of Stone Soup.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/16/12(Thu)22:01 No.17982207
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    It is not possible to target teleports through quartzite walls, but you get a bulb for your ingenuity.

    You have the Auror, Blastoise, Cleric of Desna, Max, Mentor, Minecrafter, and 2 WoW teams on Vault:7

    Your game is currently PAUSED

    Where do you want to go next?
    >Main dungeon
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/16/12(Thu)22:05 No.17982250
    Standard tactics:

    >Tunnel in from above
    >Max, Auror, and Mentor flank the enemies and fire from above. Mentor lays down nonlethal traps and sentries, Auror tries to contain the enemies with magic or put slowing traps down, and Max spams stunbombs
    >The WoW team sits a little further back and runs interception on anything that makes it up to the top floor, but otherwise heals Max/Auror/Mentor/Blastoise
    >Blastoise makes noise and acts as tank
    >Minecrafter ensures the team has multiple escape routes and places to shoot from, closes them off behind them if they're getting swamped
    >Cleric of Desna Rerolla top dolla
    >Vs. Undead opponents that you wish to capture, teleport support tries to Tomb them in rock to freeze later, or the Minecrafter will make a stairs down for them to come up around a corner into your waiting traps.
    >Anything that can't tear down a Sentry (observing tower) in the time it takes 40 Stun Bombs to teleport onto its face gets captured from a safe distance

    The quest will remain PAUSED due to lack of players until there are players. Simple enough, yes?
    >> Anonymous 02/16/12(Thu)22:05 No.17982253

    Just to clarify the nature of our mission:

    Is this an "open" looting mission? Or are we constrained to specific objectives now that the Darwin has arrived here?
    >> Codeki 02/16/12(Thu)22:06 No.17982263
    We could go clear some undead. If they're not worth much for capture, we can just hose them down with Blastoise and grab the loot.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/16/12(Thu)22:08 No.17982291
    You have no set mission objectives.
    The Darwin will return to base, report that a Dwarf Fortress crossover killed Lugonu and was defeated by you, that a S.U.E. appeared, and if the S.U.E. is dead by the time a recovery team gets here, they are to assume you did it.

    However, you are not forced to do anything. Your job description is, and always has been, "Loot anything that won't balls up the canon", and there is no limit to how much or how little you loot.
    >> Codeki 02/16/12(Thu)22:13 No.17982348
    Would you consider the AI in Stone Soup to be "intelligent"?
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/16/12(Thu)22:14 No.17982371
    The Crypts.
    Most of the monsters here have no value. However, there are some that do:
    Vampires are worth minor amounts of DOSH to capture.
    Guardian mummies are worth minor amounts of DOSH to capture.
    Mummy priests are worth a decent amount.
    Silent spectres are worth a decent amount.
    Necromancers are worth a decent amount.
    Curse Skulls are worth a lot.

    It depends on the creature.
    Some are intelligent, some are not.
    >> Slimy Burglar 02/16/12(Thu)22:22 No.17982468
    Alright, gentlemen.
    I'm going to recommend that we not engage the S.U.E. at the end of this dungeon.
    Without a Reality Emitter, I don't like our odds. This is not to say we couldn't pull it off, but I anticipate casualties if we engage.
    I suggest that we polish off the Vaults, then run the Crypt, and then decide whether or not to deal with the Elf Halls.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/16/12(Thu)22:22 No.17982482
    Of these, the Mummy Priest and Curse skull require input from the players on how to capture.

    The Silent Spectre will be frozen by the Mentor (he requires gestures to spellcast but not vocal components).
    The Vampires can be stun bombed, as can the Necromancers.
    The Guardian mummies will be led onto freezing traps, or CC'd by your WoW team, or the Auror will bind them, or the Mentor will freeze them.

    The Curse Skull is immune to enchantments, summons craptons of random undead whenever you're in LoS (this includes Greater goddamn mummies), has extremely high AC, and can invoke Torment (halves the current HP of everything in line of sight).
    It must be smacked around a bit first before it can be frozen.

    Your teleport support will box it, and you will weaken it from out of LoS by dumping holy water in the box, but you still need the Mentor to enter LoS to freeze it. There is the chance it will resist, halve the mentor's HP, and summon a crapswarm of Greater Mummies.

    The Greater Mummies like to spam Torment (halves HP of anyone in radius), Summon greater demon, summon undead spam, and Smite (bypasses walls to deal minor damage).
    You will need to smack them around a bit, before the Mentor moves in, and this may allow them to summon 2 Fiends or something and wreck your shit.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/16/12(Thu)22:24 No.17982515

    Quite a lot of Shapeshifters.
    >24 Vault Guard (DOSH)
    >Shadow Dragon (DOSH)
    >Stone Giant (DOSH)
    >Stone Giant (DOSH)
    >Shadow Dragon (DOSH)
    >Rock Troll (DOSH)
    >Tentacled Monstrosity (DOSH)
    >Tentacled Monstrosity (DOSH)
    >Frost Giant (DOSH)
    >Shadow Dragon (DOSH)
    >Stone Giant (DOSH)
    >Stone Giant (DOSH)
    >Storm Dragon (DOSH)
    >Yaktaur Captain (DOSH)
    >Yaktaur Captain (DOSH)
    >Stone Giant (DOSH)
    >Shadow Dragon (DOSH)
    >Stone Giant (DOSH)
    >Stone Giant (DOSH)
    >Stone Giant (DOSH)
    >Titan (DOSH)
    >Frost Giant (DOSH)
    >Yaktaur Captain (DOSH)
    >Shadow Dragon (DOSH)
    >Stone Giant (DOSH)
    >Stone Giant (DOSH)
    >Yaktaur Captain (DOSH)
    >Shadow Dragon (DOSH)
    >Stone Giant (DOSH)
    >Shadow Dragon (DOSH)
    >Titan (DOSH)
    >Stone Giant (DOSH)
    >Stone Giant (DOSH)
    >Stone Giant (DOSH)
    >Yaktaur Captain (DOSH)
    >Yaktaur Captain (DOSH)
    >Stone Giant (DOSH)
    >Stone Giant (DOSH)
    >Stone Giant (DOSH)
    >Stone Giant (DOSH)
    >Tentacled Monstrosity (DOSH)
    >Tentacled Monstrosity (DOSH)
    >Stone Giant (DOSH)
    >Stone Giant (DOSH)
    >Stone Giant (DOSH)
    Boss room:
    >Iron Dragon (DOSH)
    >Bone Dragon (DOSH)
    >Tentacled Monstrosity (DOSH)
    >Bone Dragon (DOSH)
    >Titan (DOSH)
    >Stone Giant (DOSH)
    >Stone Giant (DOSH)
    >Shadow Dragon (DOSH)
    >Shadow Dragon (DOSH)
    >Golden Dragon (DOSH)

    Straight from my poorly organised notes.
    Yes son, that's a lot of Stone Giant. High AC things that throw boulders at you and hit you very hard with giant clubs.
    >> Codeki 02/16/12(Thu)22:26 No.17982528
    Cleric buffs everyone with Death Guard.
    They are now immune to negative energy drain.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/16/12(Thu)22:27 No.17982542
    Hooray, rN+++!
    That should serve you well in the Elf halls too.

    So, where to, lads? Crypt or Vault:8? Either way we'll do the other one afterwards.
    >> Codeki 02/16/12(Thu)22:31 No.17982591
    probably crypts unless someone objects.

    As a heads up, our Cleric can also channel positive energy to harm nearby undead.
    >> Anonymous 02/16/12(Thu)22:32 No.17982596
    Hmm. The Crypts seems like it could be potentially very hazardous once we encounter Cursed Skulls.

    The Vaults seem like they're chock-full of fuckhueg enemies that will smack our shit if we're not careful. OP, which enemies in the vault will require our manual input? Aside from the bosses, that is.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/16/12(Thu)22:34 No.17982626
    Crypts it is!

    Q1. Do you want to risk LOOTing Curse skulls, where a roll of 10 or below gets you Greater Mummy summons, or do you wish to KILL the curse skulls, which will render them unlootable?

    Q2. Do you wish to risk LOOTing the Mummy Priests, where they WILL spam torment and summon tormentors/neqoxecs (Not 1s, my bad)?
    >> Slimy Burglar 02/16/12(Thu)22:36 No.17982649
    Let's run the Crypts.

    The Skulls, we should probably try to box.

    We can have Blastoise hit any undead that aren't worth the hassle of capturing with holy water as well.
    >> Anonymous 02/16/12(Thu)22:38 No.17982675

    Cursed Skulls sound like they're more trouble than they're worth.

    I vote for killing them. We have a lot of DOSH already, and it sounds like we could potentially wipe if we screw up or get a bad roll.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/16/12(Thu)22:38 No.17982676
    >. OP, which enemies in the vault will require our manual input?
    For now, let's say: "If anyone has any updates to the Standard Tactics™, speak up now."

    The Iron dragon is still vulnerable to stun bombs. As is the Shadow Dragon, I've found out.
    The Bone dragon, however, is NOT. It is a High HP, moderate-AC, Undead dragon that walks slowly up to you and bites you.
    >> Codeki 02/16/12(Thu)22:40 No.17982694
    Well, depending on how good their saves our, our cleric(Theurge now) can use control undead to make this easier.

    Otherwise, we should probably kill the skulls and possibly priests if they share the same magic immunity as those other mummys.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/16/12(Thu)22:43 No.17982719

    "The greater mummies act first, the first one invoking Torment to reduce the HP on your party, the second one dragging in a Fiend from the nine hells."
    "Your Auror casts Abjuration. The Fiend disappears, but the greater mummies both shudder."
    "Your Blastoise nails both of the Greater Mummies with Holy Spout, dealing damage, but they stay standing, stunned."
    "Max misses with one his Tau shots. He complains of recoil. The other nails a Greater Mummy, who is still standing."
    "The WoWers are as slow to react as always, taking at least 10 goddamn fucking seconds to engage new goddamn mobs"
    "The Minecrafter walks up and smacks one of the undead in the face with his sword. It ... doesn't do much."
    "However, your Cleric of Desna, invokes the powers of her god on the Greater mummy that got hit by the tau cannon, and it crumbles."

    >next turn

    "The Greater Mummy is stunned! It dies"
    >> Codeki 02/16/12(Thu)22:45 No.17982733
    Are they completely immune to stunning, or is their hide just too tough. If it's their hide, we could somehow get the stun bombs in them and have them be effected from the inside.

    The cleric could summon some "animals" for the dragons to eat and load them up with remotely detonated stun bombs to hit them from the inside.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/16/12(Thu)22:47 No.17982760
    Net effect:
    HP of entire team is reduced to 65% (rN+++) of what it was originally
    Your team is healed
    Your team can reattempt to stun the skull.

    As for what happens if you roll 1,1,1,1,1,100?
    Your Cleric of Desna burns a point of Constitution, as whichever Resser stayed back to res comes in and resses everyone after the summons disperse.
    Or, you may keep the Cleric of Desna in the back for INFINITE RESSING RETRIES, as the skull can't move to engage your forces.

    They are made of bone, and do not have any fleshy parts that would respond to a stun grenade.
    This is why Skeletons, Ghosts, and Golems are immune to stunning.
    >> Codeki 02/16/12(Thu)22:52 No.17982811
    Sorry, I misread that. I thought it said the dragons were immune to stunning.

    Also, throw up Undeath Ward. It should nearly all the undead away from melee range.

    "You create a pale silver barrier that repels undead. Mindless undead and intelligent undead with fewer Hit Dice than your caster level cannot enter the area or penetrate the barrier. Undead of Hit Dice equal to or greater than your caster level can pass through this barrier by making a successful Will save against the spell, but as they do so, they take 3d6 points of damage. "
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/16/12(Thu)22:56 No.17982855
    As for the Mummy Priest, a TPK there means you're teleporting your corpses back to the ship for whichever Resser got pulled out at the last moment to res.
    Its HP is too low to survive a holy surf.

    "Max killed the Mummy Priest through the wall by overestimating his Tau charge. Woops!"

    "Max wounded the Mummy priest through the wall down to low HP, the Mentor moved in to iceblock it. He does so, but in the process, he eats a Torment, reducing his HP by 35%"

    "Hello! I heard you would like infinite Hellions. Woopsie you are dead."
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/16/12(Thu)22:57 No.17982860
    Understood. So, you wish to KILL the curse skull, and KILL the mummy priests, becase 10 DOSH of skull isn't worth risking a Con point on your cleric, and 2 DOSH of Priest isn't worth risking it either?
    >> Codeki 02/16/12(Thu)22:58 No.17982869
    I'd rather destroy those crappy mobs than chance making it harder to kill you.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/16/12(Thu)23:00 No.17982896
    Roger that! You will KILL the risky mobs.

    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/16/12(Thu)23:02 No.17982912
    As you possess a Holy Blastoise and superior tactics, you are completely unthreatened. Even if it's not a FTW device, having Blastoise fire his holy water from behind cover is just too much for the poor dungeon branch. :(

    >CLERIC OF DESNA is now level 12!
    >Updating loot totals...
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/16/12(Thu)23:07 No.17982970
    rolled 26, 36, 90 = 152




    LAIR BRANCH DONE, D:18 done, Orc:4 done, Hive done, Vault:7, Crypts done.
    Jiyva (? DOSH)
    >Looting gods: Fun and profitable
    A bunch of random crappy monsters (930 DOSH)
    100 Slime Creature (500)
    24 Acid Blob (480)
    13 Stone Giant (325)
    >Success in resolving the crossover (300)
    16 Yaktaur Captain (240)
    15 Azure Jelly (150)
    10 Greater Naga (150)
    7 Hydrae (140)
    The Royal Jelly (100)
    9 Merfolk >implier (90)
    3 Fire Giant (75)
    3 Kraken (75)
    7 Siren (70)
    6 Dire Elephant (60)
    5 Merfolk Javelineer (50)
    3 Merfolk Aquamancer (45)
    4 Deep Elf Knight (40)
    2 Dragon (40)
    2 Ice Dragon (40)
    2 Iron Troll (40)
    8 Oklob Plant (40)
    4 Orc high priest (40)
    1 Lich (35)
    7 Shining Eye (35)
    6 Hell knight (30)
    5 Necromancer (25)
    4 Eye of Draining (20)
    1 Orc Warlord (20)
    2 Wizard (20)
    1 Alligator Snapping Turtle (15)
    3 Death Yak (15)
    1 Deep Elf Sorcerer (15)
    3 Hill Giant (15)
    3 Rock Troll (15)
    3 Spiny Worm (15)
    2 Boring Beetle (10)
    2 Great Orb of Eyes (10)
    1 Very Ugly Thing (10)
    1 Giant Orange Brain (5)
    1 Fire Crab (5)

    Random dungeoncrap (360 DOSH)
    34 Unique Spellbooks (170)
    11 Glorious Artefacts (110)
    3 Runes of Zot (75)
    30 Zot Traps (75)
    19 Royal Jellies (38)
    1 Scroll of Acquirement (10)
    1 Scroll of Torment
    1 Scroll of Holy Word

    Also, we will need 3d100.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/16/12(Thu)23:09 No.17982987
    WoW team 2 has gotten itself killed rushing ahead, and believing they could handle the Curse Skull.
    You resurrect WoW team 2.
    >> Slimy Burglar 02/16/12(Thu)23:09 No.17982998
    rolled 64, 8, 58 = 130

    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/16/12(Thu)23:13 No.17983032
    rolled 18, 7, 96, 94, 89, 89, 9, 11, 34, 70, 25, 31, 72 = 645

    Also, it should be 40 zot traps for 200 DOSH.

    WoW team 2 reports that it has captured a Curse skull on its 2nd attempt. Well, not captured, but weakened enough that you could stun it easily.
    You loot a Curse skull!
    WoW team 2 gained: EGO

    Rolling for Vaults:8. Enemy roll is fixed to AT LEAST 50 owing to how many of them there are.
    Your rolls are fixed to AT LEAST 30 because let's face it. You aren't noobs to crawl any more.

    Max, Auror, Mentor, Blastoise, Minecrafter, Cleric, WoW team 1, WoW team 2, 4 Cleric of Desna rerolls to be applied where needed, and Enemy roll.
    >> Slimy Burglar 02/16/12(Thu)23:14 No.17983044
    Chastise the WoW team for not sticking with the rest of the group.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/16/12(Thu)23:16 No.17983063
    Your WoW team is uncomfortable sitting around and doing nothing. Fortunately for you, and them, they're also good at their Attackmoving. Most of the time.

    >Assign 70 to Max (18), 34 to Auror (7)?
    >> Codeki 02/16/12(Thu)23:18 No.17983093
    Sure, Max is our main stunner and a low roll on him is worse than on our Auror.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/16/12(Thu)23:21 No.17983126
         File: 1329452497.jpg-(53 KB, 550x629, Leeroy_jenkins.jpg)
    53 KB
    Your WoW teams opt to AoE pull the entire area, and bring it to a single point, where they will defeat it.
    They are successful at everything up until the "Defeat" part.
    Their corpses are teleported up to the ship for repair and rebuffing.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/16/12(Thu)23:27 No.17983187
    However, despite the immense hazards associated with AoEing down massive hordes of enemies, it also has MANY upsides.

    "Yo, Blasty. Cover me." Max quips.

    Your Auror hangs in the back buffing everyone with buff spells, moves up to engage ... and promptly takes a crapton of rocks to the face.
    He opts to stay back and buff.

    "Damn. There's a HUNDRED of them, at least.", Max complains.
    Blastoise steps forward. Between his hard shell, great levels, and impressive cover, he holds the line.
    "Just my kinda odds."
    Your Mentor steps up, trying a new trap he's been testing.
    The Growing Bounce Trap.
    It's a bounce trap that spreads out to fill an area, to bounce and disorient everyone in the area.
    It proves effective.
    He follows it up with Sentries, for teleport spotting.

    "Bah. I'm gonna need healing support"
    40 Stun Bombs Per Second of Fury envelop the area, as Max does what he does best, backed up by a very impressively levelled Cleric.

    Let's see which mobs survived...
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/16/12(Thu)23:31 No.17983219
    rolled 64, 46, 5 = 115

    Giant and titan status:
    Bouncing around, eating stun bombs.
    Yaktaur status:
    Bouncing around, eating stun bombs.
    Dragon status:
    Bouncing around, eating stun bombs.

    3 rolls comin' up. Max, Mentor, Blastoise.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/16/12(Thu)23:35 No.17983265
    rolled 95 = 95

    "... Toise ..."
    Blastoise, having held the line against creatures he had no right to hold the line against, dies.
    He is sent up to the ship for Ressing.

    "My kind of party."
    Max continues raining stunbombs down on the opponents with healing support.

    "Woohoo, Moshpit!"
    Your Auror jumps down into the moshpit of enemies and starts flinging ice spells around. It's not very effective, but it looks fun.

    After a few minutes, you've looted every monster but ONE, and stunned bodies are still continuing their grand tour of gravity and elasticity.

    The Bone Dragon.
    Your Minecrafter puts it in a box to deal with later, Tau shots weaken it to near-death, and the Mentor...
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/16/12(Thu)23:37 No.17983286
         File: 1329453450.png-(18 KB, 669x731, vaults8.png)
    18 KB
    ... puts it on ice, easily dodging its shots.
    "Woo! Mosh pit. Careful with those stun bombs, Maxie. One hit from Boney could've stunned me."
    "You know, you COULD have just stayed up here. I know your spells are RANGED, jackass."
    "Where's the fun in that?"

    >Vaults:8 looted
    >> Slimy Burglar 02/16/12(Thu)23:43 No.17983333
    Now that the Vaults are clear, are we down to the Elf Halls and the remainder of the main dungeon?
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/16/12(Thu)23:44 No.17983345
    >Mentor saved at 1hp
    >Auror saved at 1hp
    >Max got smacked around a bit, life gem proved useful
    >Minecrafter got smacked around a bit, life armor proved useful
    >Cleric of Desna completely fine
    >Blastoise Died
    >WoW teams Died
    >Luckily, both of those have been through death and back many times. They'll be on their feet soon with no penalties, aside from perhaps a bruised ego

    Now updating loot list.

    Elf:5 will prove much more tricky. Due to the lack of teleport support here, a TPK actually is a TPK, and you can't use the teleporter to box people in.
    That said, it's just Elves, and you DO have a bulb that will let you basically autowin the area.
    >> Slimy Burglar 02/16/12(Thu)23:47 No.17983369
    I'm going to suggest that we run Elf Halls, and burn a bulb on Elf: 5.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/16/12(Thu)23:48 No.17983385
    Deliberately burning bulbs will give you lots of hints! However, it may anger the other people playing the quest. I'll give them a chance to deny your actions, and if none of them do, you will deliberately use the bulb and gain the info.
    >> Not completely retarded 02/16/12(Thu)23:49 No.17983396
    Why not just drop electrified nets and bboxes down from above after using the teleporter to dig out the room above, so that we aren't teleporting into the antiteleport ares, but over it and letting gravity move them into position?
    >> Anonymous 02/16/12(Thu)23:49 No.17983403
    >bulb allows for autowin

    hm...what's our bulb situation?
    >> Slimy Burglar 02/16/12(Thu)23:51 No.17983415

    >it may anger the other people playing the quest.

    That's why I phrased it as an open suggestion.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/16/12(Thu)23:51 No.17983420
    That allows them to use their EV to dodge shit. Some of them will. Your teleporter would rather teleport in Stun bombs!
    3 SUPERCHARGED, 2 Regular.

    Free bulb available if you solve the puzzle posted in >>17978980
    solve it now, and you get 3 extra red bulbs, for an upgrade.
    >> Slimy Burglar 02/16/12(Thu)23:52 No.17983425
    Three red bulbs, two green bulbs.
    >> Anonymous 02/16/12(Thu)23:58 No.17983468

    The puzzle is essentially "guess the phrase using these preset letters", right?

    Also, do the Scrabble letters above/below each blank space correspond to that blank space only? Or are they all usable for both blank spaces?
    >> Not completely retarded 02/16/12(Thu)23:59 No.17983471
    Petrificus totalis totalis?
    Use bright light to disorient the targets?
    Charm monster while invisible?
    The new super bounce trap mentor made?
    Sweeping spray from blastoise?
    I'm neutral on the spending a bulb, as we will probably regain it soon enough.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)00:01 No.17983485
    If you ever played scrabble you'd have an idea. Answer is a 6 letter word and a 4 letter word.




    LAIR BRANCH DONE, D:18 done, Orc done, Hive done, Vaul done, Crypts done.
    Jiyva (? DOSH)
    >Looting gods: Fun and profitable
    A bunch of random crappy monsters (950 DOSH)
    36 Stone Giant (900)
    100 Slime Creature (500)
    24 Acid Blob (480)
    24 Vault Guard (360)
    22 Yaktaur Captain (330)
    >Success in resolving the crossover (300)
    9 Shadow Dragon (225)
    5 Tentacled Monstrosity (175)
    15 Azure Jelly (150)
    10 Greater Naga (150)
    7 Hydrae (140)
    3 Titan (105)
    9 Merfolk >implier (90)
    3 Fire Giant (75)
    3 Kraken (75)
    2 Bone Dragon (70)
    7 Siren (70)
    6 Dire Elephant (60)
    2 Frost Giant (50)
    5 Merfolk Javelineer (50)
    3 Merfolk Aquamancer (45)
    4 Deep Elf Knight (40)
    2 Dragon (40)
    2 Ice Dragon (40)
    2 Iron Troll (40)
    8 Oklob Plant (40)
    4 Orc high priest (40)
    1 Lich (35)
    7 Shining Eye (35)
    1 Golden Dragon (30)
    1 Iron Dragon (30)
    6 Hell knight (30)
    5 Necromancer (25)
    1 Storm Dragon (25)
    4 Eye of Draining (20)
    1 Orc Warlord (20)
    4 Rock Troll (20)
    2 Wizard (20)
    1 Alligator Snapping Turtle (15)
    3 Death Yak (15)
    1 Deep Elf Sorcerer (15)
    3 Hill Giant (15)
    3 Spiny Worm (15)
    2 Boring Beetle (10)
    1 Curse Skull (10)
    2 Great Orb of Eyes (10)
    1 Very Ugly Thing (10)
    1 Giant Orange Brain (5)
    1 Fire Crab (5)

    You got 1,500 DOSH of Monsters alone from that level!
    >> Anonymous 02/17/12(Fri)00:01 No.17983490
    I vote to just burn one for a hint, instead of the ones for autowin.
    Plus, autowins are boring.
    And we still have a code to crack, and the only things we know are:
    1) Scrabble
    2) Repeated letters between each pair
    3) Each pair has the same length, but the solution word for each pair has one letter less.
    >> Anonymous 02/17/12(Fri)00:06 No.17983540
    I assume that we have to get the highest scoring word for each pair, but I don't see the relevance of the hint. Unless the second word IS hilt, then it would be not the highest scoring one.
    >> Anonymous 02/17/12(Fri)00:16 No.17983622
    And to bump this thread, i think the second one is "hard". Only word with both highest scoring letters (H,D) that I can think of.
    >> Slimy Burglar 02/17/12(Fri)00:19 No.17983654
    Seems reasonable.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)00:20 No.17983658
    There's no guarantee that the correct solve is highest scoring, but it ALMOST certainly is.

    DAA, IRL and ODT aren't real words. Have you even PLAYED scrabble, son?
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)00:27 No.17983716
         File: 1329456459.png-(81 KB, 601x601, scrabbleboard.png)
    81 KB
    This is a valid scrabble position. Find the words. I'm sorry if the puzzle wasn't clear, but for god's sake someone here has to have played scrabble.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)00:28 No.17983723
    And get that TRIPLE BULB SCORE.
    Or don't. People here are apparently as terrible at scrabble as they are at mastermind.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)00:32 No.17983754
    Oh, updated the 2nd part of your lootlist.

    Random dungeoncrap (450 DOSH)
    40 Zot Traps (200)
    34 Unique Spellbooks (170)
    11 Glorious Artefacts (110)
    4 Runes of Zot (100)
    19 Royal Jellies (38)
    1 Scroll of Acquirement (10)
    2 Scroll of Holy Word
    1 Scroll of Torment
    1 Scroll of Vulnerability

    The Royal Jelly (100)
    Frederick (35)
    Nikola (35)
    Mennas (35)
    Xtahua (35)
    Wiglaf (30)
    Ilsuiw (25)
    Kirke (25)
    Roxanne (25)
    Rupert (25)
    Aizul (20)
    Azrael (20)
    Donald (20)
    Frances (20)
    Gastronok (20)
    Maud (20)
    Dissolution (15)
    Polyphemus (15)
    Erica (10)
    Joseph (10)
    Nergalle (10)
    Nessos (10)
    Urug (10)
    Blork (5)
    Psyche (5)
    Purgy (5)
    Sigmund (5)

    I expect we won't have many people playing. I'll wait until someone solved the scrabble puzzle before continuing.
    >> Anonymous 02/17/12(Fri)00:36 No.17983793
    Sorry, words aren't my strong point.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)00:37 No.17983806
    You are [1] person.
    I shall wait for adidtional people!
    >> Slimy Burglar 02/17/12(Fri)00:37 No.17983811
    Thanks for the clarification, OP.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)00:42 No.17983839
    You are currently carrying 8,100 DOSH of stuff.
    That's a lot of DOSH!

    You are [2] people. I shall continue to wait for a puzzle solver for
    >> Slimy Burglar 02/17/12(Fri)00:46 No.17983873
    Okay, I'm starting with the first word.

    Letter 1: Almost certainly a vowel.
    Letter 2: A or U
    Letter 3: Could be many things, leave until last.
    Letter 4: E, H, I or O
    Letter 5: Is a vowel.
    Letter 6: R or T

    Any suggestions, gentlemen?
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)00:49 No.17983893
    In the meantime, I will attempt to UPGRADE your puzzle!
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)00:49 No.17983894
    The picture at >>17983716 and >>17978980 don't match. Is that on purpose?
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)00:51 No.17983915
    Aye, I fucked up the first one, I'll delete it.
    >> Slimy Burglar 02/17/12(Fri)00:53 No.17983931
    OP, is the first word AUTHOR, by any chance?

    Working on the second word now.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)00:53 No.17983941
    It is indeed AUTHOR.
    >> Not completely retarded 02/17/12(Fri)00:54 No.17983948
    Cheating is encouraged in the guard, right?
    If we find a way to get the job done, high command won't mind a little dishonesty.
    Here's a scrabble solving tool i found
    >> Slimy Burglar 02/17/12(Fri)00:58 No.17983988
    Second word might be SELF, but I'm not sure.
    >> Anonymous 02/17/12(Fri)00:58 No.17983992
    might the last letter for word 2 be U? not sure what else it might be.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)00:58 No.17983993
    Hooray! But I've almost finished a THIRD word to include in the picture.
    >> Slimy Burglar 02/17/12(Fri)01:00 No.17984007
    The third word is INSERT. I'm calling it now.
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)01:04 No.17984051
    Small question. You've said before that if we were to drain water, we would need someplace to put it.
    If we were to somehow get a large quantity of water and put it in the main branch. . .

    How well can you swim?
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)01:09 No.17984084
         File: 1329458943.png-(5 KB, 447x455, bulbs_6_green.png)
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    Congratulations! your bulbs evolved into 6 bulbs!

    Where to now?
    >Main dungeon

    That would have worked before, but I very hastily drew decks of defense until I was able to Tomb the orb of zot into a room. I would have an air bubble.
    Amazing when you can read your players' minds, isn't it?
    >> Anonymous 02/17/12(Fri)01:09 No.17984085
    The best part of this is that we already knew from the last thread about Bootleg's character being the big fuckhuge distortion.
    Oh well, the puzzle was still unsolved.
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)01:14 No.17984127
    From what I can tell via the wiki, we're best off doing Elf next because the Tomb is like the crypt, but rapetastic.
    >> Slimy Burglar 02/17/12(Fri)01:15 No.17984145
    I say we do it anyway, flood the last two or three floors.
    >> Anonymous 02/17/12(Fri)01:15 No.17984146
    This. Also,because I don't like having a backlog of "branches I have seen but are yet to be completed".
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)01:17 No.17984159
    If Tomb, explain tactics, as Teleport support is disabled for a very wide area until you pick up the rune.
    Walls are still diggable in both places.

    Elf? Right. Let's see.
    You've got rN+++
    You've got superior tactics
    No elves can fly.
    However, there IS a large supply of enemy blinkers. They are liable to blink up to behind your cover. This may be troublesome if the blinker is one of the tougher monsters, though you do have the WoWteam to handle that.
    Once they've blinked up they can't blink away due to your antitele orb.
    >> Slimy Burglar 02/17/12(Fri)01:17 No.17984161
    I second this. also, I suggest we leave the SUE on the final floor to someone with a Reality Emitter.
    >> Not completely retarded 02/17/12(Fri)01:18 No.17984166
    We could rebuild the FTW machine and build a new pipe if we need to, but it could damage the loot.

    Heavy teleport support also gives us the option on dropping a kinetic penetrator on the dungeon from orbit if we need to, but that would break the loot left in the dungeon, and might adversely affect canon.

    I'm up for elves, Invis on all troops, anti level drain spell on everyone.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)01:19 No.17984178
    A vast majority of the elves cannot See Invis. The few that can on elf:1-4 are very sparse, and are met with little resistance as the Mentor lols in, throws down a sentry, lols out, and Bombs teleport onto their faces.

    Would you like a HINT (1 Bulb) for Elf:5?
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)01:21 No.17984190
    This HINT also applies to Tomb, if you're interested.
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)01:22 No.17984191
    Blink is teleport right? Dimensional anchor disables MAGICAL teleport. Die Elves, Die!
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)01:23 No.17984204
    Can your Cleric cast Dim Anchor yet?
    It's still level 13.
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)01:23 No.17984211
    It's a lvl 4 spell. He should have that.
    >> Anonymous 02/17/12(Fri)01:24 No.17984220
    Just to toss a reminder out there:

    We already have quite a bit of DOSH. If things look like they're heating up too much for us, or if it seems likely we're going to end up with a TPK on a certain part of DCSS, we might want to consider packing up and returning to base with our current haul.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)01:24 No.17984222
    It's a Ray, though, so your cleric will need to win initiative to land it on someone. Still, I'll assume you spam it on anything that can troll you by blinking (Especially the annhilators).
    >> Slimy Burglar 02/17/12(Fri)01:25 No.17984226
    Dimensional Anchor is 4th level.
    Our cleric can cast it multiple times.
    >> Not completely retarded 02/17/12(Fri)01:25 No.17984229
    Can our magic users do some anti magic stuff to block summoning?
    Let's have the magic users spam summons to protect our troops against flanking, if the enemy cant see invis, then they'll go for the summoned monsters instead.
    If something is summoned behind cover, we can safely teleslice it, as summoned things despawn.
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)01:27 No.17984242
    Teleport disabled until rune is grabbed? Have Steve dig through the wall until he's under the lowest level of the Tomb. Ninjaloot the rune. Teleportation's back.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)01:29 No.17984255
    >Can our magic users do some anti magic stuff to block summoning?
    There is indeed a way to block summoning, but it is non obvious.
    I figured you would do this. There are Greater Mummies standing on and near the rune. How will you get them to piss off long enough to grab that fukken rune?
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)01:29 No.17984260
    And as it is non obvious, you must use HINT!
    Use HINT y/n?
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)01:31 No.17984274
    Animals summoned by cleric next to them to piss them off and distract them?

    sure, use a hint.
    >> Slimy Burglar 02/17/12(Fri)01:32 No.17984278
    We just earned a new bulb, so I vote yes.
    If there are any objections, speak now or forever hold your peace.
    >> Anonymous 02/17/12(Fri)01:35 No.17984304
    I can't think of anything else than summoning a veritable meatwall or drowning them in holy water, so...
    Wait, I remember that we made a plan before for capturing mummies. Does someone remember its details?
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)01:36 No.17984311
         File: 1329460593.png-(5 KB, 447x455, bulbs_5green_1off.png)
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    Put the Silent Spectre you captured in a cage made out of metal, and ensure it is surrounded by bounce traps so it can't take damage from a fall.

    You now have a Portable Silence Emitter.

    Drop it into the killzone on Elf:5 and it will prevent enemy spellcasting. All of it. Since you are firing from above, the only other thing left to worry about are Master Archers.

    An Auror can cast Reflection spells on party members. These reflect hostile enemy attacks, such as bolts, magic beams, and arrows. Have him spam the crap out of this.

    Projected Noise is a good way to get anything to piss off for a few seconds, and will grant you enough time to loot the Golden Rune safely.

    To capture those goddamn Greater Mummies safely, you can lure them into a 1-tile-wide corridor and box them. From there, you can bring in the spectre, and lol as the Greater Mummies can't cast shit. They still hit hard, but your Mentor can handle it.
    >> Anonymous 02/17/12(Fri)01:42 No.17984360
    I was having doubts about Silence and Projected Noise, but the wiki says that the latter originates from where the caster is.
    So, no problems.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)01:47 No.17984394
    You could also have the Auror cast silence, but this prevents him from casting anything else. If he stands outside the Silent Spectre's range, he can sling spells easily. Since your plan, by default, is to attack from cover upstairs, you can easily do this.

    You will face Five challenges on the level below.

    1 Elf Annihilator (damaging spellcaster)
    2 Elf Demonologists (summons demons)
    1 Elf Sorcerer (Banishing, Haste, summons demons, hellfire)
    Norris, a Unique. (Drains your intelligence quickly from range, can be cured with a unicorn horn though)
    These are outside the usual Elf vault.

    Do you wish to use any special tactics for these? By default, you will take them down from superior cover and with a flanking attack.
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)01:47 No.17984399
    >silent emitter
    Cast D&D silence on an item. Drop it in, Silence moves with the item.
    >projected noise
    Ghost sound would also work.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)01:49 No.17984407
    As for why you don't just use the silent spectre on all of these: They wander. It may be difficult to get them to STAY in the spectre's range.
    And using Projected noise to bait them towards a Silent Spectre...
    I'll let you figure out exactly why that won't work.
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)01:50 No.17984421
    Enchant one of the hunter's arrows with silence.
    Shoot the arrow at the caster. Boom, they have an arrow in them that silences them.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)01:51 No.17984433
    They can Save vs. it, can't they?
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)01:53 No.17984451
    Only if you cast it on them or an attended item. You can also cast it right next to them and they get no save.

    Upon the casting of this spell, complete silence prevails in the affected area. All sound is stopped: Conversation is impossible, spells with verbal components cannot be cast, and no noise whatsoever issues from, enters, or passes through the area. The spell can be cast on a point in space, but the effect is stationary unless cast on a mobile object. The spell can be centered on a creature, and the effect then radiates from the creature and moves as it moves. An unwilling creature can attempt a Will save to negate the spell and can use Spell Resistance, if any. Items in a creature's possession or magic items that emit sound receive the benefits of saves and Spell Resistance, but unattended objects and points in space do not. Creatures in an area of a silence spell are immune to sonic or language-based attacks, spells, and effects.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)01:54 No.17984456
    Because, every one of your targets is "Incredibly Magic Resistant", and gets enough MR saves to make them practically immune to hostile enchantments (of which D&D's silence is one).
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)01:55 No.17984466
    I see. The Unwilling creature has to be the spell's Target to save vs. it?
    Kind of crap to make an ambiguious SRD there, but whatevs.
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)01:57 No.17984483
    Pretty much. They only get a save if they're targeted directly. The trade off is that they can exit the silence if it's cast next to them. That's why I like casting it on an arrow and shooting them with it. Then they can't leave the zone of silence.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)01:59 No.17984500
    rolled 34, 24, 31, 27, 83, 95, 16, 14, 71, 76, 90, 42, 46, 26, 82, 16 = 773


    Max, Auror, Mentor, Blastoise, Minecrafter, Cleric, WoW 1, WoW 2, 4 possible rerolls, and 4 Enemy rolls to get a variety of enemy competence levels.
    >> Slimy Burglar 02/17/12(Fri)01:59 No.17984503
    It is possible for them to leave the zone, but that requires them realizing that the arrow is the center of the effect and then removing the arrow.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)02:01 No.17984530
    Max: 34
    Auror: 24
    Mentor: 31
    Blastoise: 27
    WoW 1: 16
    WoW 2: 14
    (Shit lads get it together)
    Minecrafter: 83
    Cleric: 95

    Rerolls: 71,76,90,42

    Enemies: 46,26,82,16.

    Assign Rerolls to which people?
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)02:02 No.17984536
    Also. Let's suppose a Level 13 Cleric does REALLY WELL.

    What would that imply?
    Everyone is healed forever?
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)02:05 No.17984554
    Mentor 82
    Auror 46
    Wow1 26
    Wow2 16

    Probably that he realized his team is a bunch of fuck ups and made sure to use Prayer and several other buffs to keep them from killing themselves.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)02:06 No.17984559
    You appear to have confused the Enemies with the Rerolls! That was silly of you.
    >> Anonymous 02/17/12(Fri)02:07 No.17984569
    Give the 90 to the Auror since Silence is a kiiiind of critical component of this plan.
    71 and 76 to the wow teams since I assume that's who's going to be doing the arrow-silencing
    And Blastoise can have the 42 as a 'let this be a lesson' to everyone else who rolled low.
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)02:09 No.17984586
    That's fair. Our Cleric is also a Mystic Theurge by now because you said he could multiclass.
    He's got lvl 5 cleric spells and lvl 3 arcane.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)02:12 No.17984621
    So, we're going with below-average but not terrible Max and Mentor, average Blastoise, Well above-average WoW teams, Excellent Auror and Minecrafter, and Uber Cleric.

    The enemies are average, well below average, Excellent, and shitty.

    Let us begin!
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)02:20 No.17984683
    The main thing you notice with the Mentor is that he's laying Growing bounce traps.
    Like, literally everywhere. Growing bounce traps.
    They'll need to rename this place the goddamn Fun Halls or someshit.
    By the time he reaches the bottom, he reports that he's running low on trapbuilding credits, but he built the most kickin' transportation system to get shit in and out of the dungeon.

    Max checks his aim and rate of fire. Decent, as usual. However, he is not confident in his ability to dodge enemy fire, and prefers to act from behind safe cover instead of jetpacking into the middle like a boss.

    Blastoise, faithful as always, is watering the plants and taking his frustrations out on enemy summons. He may have killed a few Trashmobs this way, as he's reached level 80, and his Surf is a room-clearer.

    Fortunately, the WoW teams have them covered.
    Moving like a well oiled machine, the place is a flurry of Stuns, Roots, Snares, and Heals. You'd ALMOST think they ran through a building of elite elves every single goddamn week. The WoWers seem to have trouble with the Demonologists and Sorcerers, until UNRESISTABLE SILENCE, at which point they win forever.

    Your Minecrafter manages to dig out a damn-near ideal location for sniping Elf:5, and he ALSO is fast enough to box any Blinking enemies into boxes.

    The Auror, at the top of his game today, is an Angel of damage reflection and AoE Sleep/Confusion walking through the valley of Capture. You're confident he could've done the entire damn thing on his own. As you reach the end of the Elf Halls, the Auror proves, once again, that Haste and a Crapton of birds beat damn near everything.
    In fact, he even learned a new spell.
    >Nonlethal blast
    >It's a Stun bomb. but MADE OF MAGIC

    And your Cleric of Desna, well...
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)02:29 No.17984776
    Your enemies fare much worse.
    The first real instance of "Skill" you encounter is when a Death Mage sees your team, realises you have rN+++, and runs like a little girl to warn his friends instead of sitting and fighting you.

    One Demonologist has prepared. He's summoned and is maintaining 4 Fiends. How will you approach him? Fiends can Torment and Hellfire.

    An Annihilator takes a potshot at your Minecrafter with Lehudib's crystal spear.
    It hits him. However, it wasn't a lethal hit. Barely.

    One Sorcerer tries to banish your forces. ... Well, they all do, but your anti-magic orb glows a Deep purple, and the banish is stopped. THIS one, in particular, is smart enough to yell to his colleagues not to bother with Banishment, and to focus on demons.

    Another Annihilator nails your minecrafter with a crystal spear as he digs out the fortifications. Again, a bare survive. Good ol' healing.

    2 Death Mages panic, and begin Exhuming corpses. You now have a large amount of weakass skeletons to face.

    Finally, the 3rd Crystal Spear that hits your Minecrafter kills him. In Death, he dropped his armor. The Unique on the level picks it up and wears it, while the Minecrafter makes a replacement.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)02:33 No.17984819
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    Fiends, of course, are no match for Abjuration.
    Your Auror calmly walks into the room with the Fiends.
    Your Auror takes a step closer. The Demonologist summons more demons.
    Your Auror takes another step.
    The demonologist tries to send the Auror to the abyss. It doesn't work.
    The demonologist tries to teleport himself away. A Finite Incantum later, it doesn't work.
    "I am the end of magic. Bow to me."
    And a Stunning blast is his end.
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)02:35 No.17984843
    When our Theurge goes home, he's going to need to pick up a few spellbooks from his canon for our Auror buddy. Peter's going to have something for any occasion.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)02:36 No.17984855
         File: 1329464216.png-(2 KB, 127x191, instant_win.png)
    2 KB
    Elf 1: "...?"
    Elf 2: "...!"
    Elf 3: "... .... ... ... ... ..., ... ... ..."
    Elf 4: "...!"
    Elf 5: "... ...!!!!"
    Elf 6: "..."
    Elf 7: "... ... ... ... ... ...?"
    Elf 8:" ... ..."
    Elf 9" ... ... ... ... ... ... ..., ... ... ...?"
    Elf 10: "...!"
    >> Anonymous 02/17/12(Fri)02:37 No.17984868
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)02:39 No.17984890
    I'm going to attempt a translation.
    Elf 1: "What?"
    Elf 2: "Crap!"
    Elf 3: "What happened to my voice? Oh, fuck fuck fuck"

    Others, see above.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)02:40 No.17984900
    Blastoise, having little better to do, is on "Push the metal box" duty, and the metal box rolls around on a few Marbles (now where did the Auror get those?) as it tracks across the final elf level.

    One brave elf targets and uses banishment ...
    ... on himself. Welp, that's one way out of a bad situation.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)02:42 No.17984907
    Please enjoy this video while I calculate how much DOSH you earned.

    >> Not completely retarded 02/17/12(Fri)02:42 No.17984912
    Holy surf around the corner, maybe spam summoned creatures at them?
    Mirror on a stick to target the demon spawning guy?
    Why isnt the observer tower spamming stunbombs at the guy with the demons?
    Max has tau cannons, summoned stuff isnt worth dosh, have him kill them from the next room over.
    What's under the fortified foes? Can we dig a pit under them, close all but a tiny viewing hole, and teleport out the floor under the foes, maybe flooding the pit with holy water so they have to swim?
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)02:44 No.17984921
    Ha! A pit of waist-deep holy water to counter summoners. Your style, sir, I like it. Have a bulb.

    You now have 6 GREEN BULBS.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)02:48 No.17984961
    Let's see. How much DOSH should each individual elf be worth...

    Elf Knights 10
    Elf High priests 10
    Elf Demonologists 10
    Elf Sorcerers 20
    Elf Death mages 20
    Elf master archers 20
    Elf blademasters 20

    And perhaps ... 40? Dosh of crapmobs per level. Norris is 35.
    >> Anonymous 02/17/12(Fri)02:51 No.17984985
    You forgot the annihilators. Which so far have only annihilated Steve's pride.
    And maybe some other things.
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)02:52 No.17984991
    Depending on how open the area is, we can also use Magic Circles against evil to ward off summons. We could seal off specific paths to demons so they can't roam too far away.

    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)02:57 No.17985039
    20 each. I knew I was forgetting something.




    LAIR BRANCH DONE, D:18 done, Orc done, Hive done, Vault done, Crypts done.
    Jiyva (? DOSH)
    >Looting gods: Fun and profitable
    A bunch of random crappy monsters (1150 DOSH)
    36 Stone Giant (900)
    100 Slime Creature (500)
    24 Acid Blob (480)
    24 Vault Guard (360)
    22 Yaktaur Captain (330)
    >Success in resolving the crossover (300)
    29 Deep Elf Knight (290)
    9 Shadow Dragon (225)
    11 Deep Elf Death Mage (220)
    5 Tentacled Monstrosity (175)
    15 Azure Jelly (150)
    10 Greater Naga (150)
    7 Deep Elf Annihilator (140)
    7 Hydrae (140)
    7 Deep Elf Sorcerer (105)
    3 Titan (105)
    9 Merfolk >implier (90)
    3 Fire Giant (75)
    3 Kraken (75)
    2 Bone Dragon (70)
    7 Siren (70)
    6 Dire Elephant (60)
    2 Frost Giant (50)
    5 Merfolk Javelineer (50)
    3 Merfolk Aquamancer (45)
    2 Deep Elf Blademaster (40)
    2 Deep Elf Master Archer (40)
    2 Dragon (40)
    2 Ice Dragon (40)
    2 Iron Troll (40)
    8 Oklob Plant (40)
    4 Orc high priest (40)
    1 Lich (35)
    7 Shining Eye (35)
    3 Deep Elf Demonologist (30)
    1 Golden Dragon (30)
    1 Iron Dragon (30)
    6 Hell knight (30)
    5 Necromancer (25)
    1 Storm Dragon (25)
    2 Deep Elf High Priest (20)
    4 Eye of Draining (20)
    1 Orc Warlord (20)
    4 Rock Troll (20)
    2 Wizard (20)
    1 Alligator Snapping Turtle (15)
    3 Death Yak (15)
    3 Hill Giant (15)
    3 Spiny Worm (15)
    2 Boring Beetle (10)
    1 Curse Skull (10)
    2 Great Orb of Eyes (10)
    1 Very Ugly Thing (10)
    1 Giant Orange Brain (5)
    1 Fire Crab (5)

    And yes sorcs are 15, I forgot their abilities were mostly related to the Abyss, which doesn't exist in places that we sell them to.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)03:02 No.17985085
    Random dungeoncrap (525 DOSH)
    45 Zot Traps (225)
    35 Unique Spellbooks (175)
    16 Glorious Artefacts (160)
    4 Runes of Zot (100)
    20 Royal Jellies (40)
    2 Scroll of Acquirement (20)
    2 Scroll of Holy Word
    2 Scroll of Torment
    1 Scroll of Vulnerability

    The Royal Jelly (100)
    Frederick (35)
    Nikola (35)
    Norris (35)
    Mennas (35)
    Xtahua (35)
    Wiglaf (30)
    Ilsuiw (25)
    Kirke (25)
    Roxanne (25)
    Rupert (25)
    Aizul (20)
    Azrael (20)
    Donald (20)
    Frances (20)
    Gastronok (20)
    Maud (20)
    Dissolution (15)
    Polyphemus (15)
    Erica (10)
    Joseph (10)
    Nergalle (10)
    Nessos (10)
    Urug (10)
    Blork (5)
    Psyche (5)
    Purgy (5)
    Sigmund (5)

    Where to now?
    >Dungeon down to D:27

    Talk to Elyvion y/n?
    >> Not completely retarded 02/17/12(Fri)03:04 No.17985103
    Do our troops get to keep their gear after the mission? I think They've earned it, they should get to keep it unless they want to upgrade.
    Can we get our magic users to share spells with each other later? It'd be useful if they all tried to learn the nethack and crawl spells at least.
    Let's put that box of silence on a cart so any of our team can push it around.
    Are we going to loot the dead dwarf fortress? There should still be a rune of zot in there, maybe we can scry it and dig straight to it?
    Can holy blastoise use holy catter cutter, or is that just the squad operated firehose?
    Before we go we should ask the gods of this world if there is anything else worth looting here.
    When are we going to go hang out with the gods anyway, you suggested it earlier, but we never got around to it.
    >> Anonymous 02/17/12(Fri)03:04 No.17985107
    I don't see any harm in this. Last we checked, we were on Elyvion's good side, so I don't think we're going to get shivved without at least a warning.
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)03:05 No.17985111
    Sure, why not.
    Also, I vote for main.
    >> Anonymous 02/17/12(Fri)03:05 No.17985117
    Y'know who should be on the team? it may be a bit late for a new member, but...
    Not even trolling. Mild magical ability, mapmaking/navigation, bartering/charisma, and an awesome balloon that shoots forth from his ass.
    Just saiyan.
    ...Also, Bardock would sound fun. Berserkers are beastly.
    >> Slimy Burglar 02/17/12(Fri)03:06 No.17985126
    Seconding the vote for main. Tombs seem like more trouble than they're worth.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)03:08 No.17985147
    You sell your troops, and their gear, back when you're done.
    Peter will be unavailable for a few missions while he teaches at Hogwarts.
    The Silence box is already on a cart. It's just that Walls made of Metal are fucking heavy and require a Blastoise to push around. Fucker can move fire trucks.
    You do not have any squad operated firehose, but you do have a Blastoise.

    Blastoise reports that it is happy that it got to fight in the Crypt.

    >Before we go we should ask the gods of this world if there is anything else worth looting here.
    Everyone else reports that looting is mostly the domain of mortals.

    You kneel before the altar...
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)03:08 No.17985152
    Well, unless we were to do a "Flood with holy water then loot the items" path.

    I'd really rather not chance that place otherwise. It's one of the places that's the one of the bigger pains in the ass.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)03:10 No.17985168
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    "Hi! The commitment you're showing to nonlethality is astounding."
    Your Priests and Paladins kneel with you.
    "But I have to ask. What are you planning to DO with all those creatures?"

    You already have a relatively safe way to capture everything. It's called Silent Specter In A Box and it completely wrecks Tomb.
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)03:13 No.17985191
    We're capturing these creatures so that others in our group may use them to save the lives of trillions of people.

    Also, because we like a big paycheck.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)03:15 No.17985212
    "Trillions of people? That's a bit grand; there are barely 5 million people under my worship, so at most there are 500 million in the world."
    "And I must ask - how will you save someone with ALL these creatures? Even one tenth of what you have could match all the armies in the world; for what purpose do you use the other nine-tenths?"
    >> Anonymous 02/17/12(Fri)03:16 No.17985222
    >Implying it wont save future generations
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)03:17 No.17985229
    "And Who, might I ask, would pay for all these?"
    "There's not a single person in the world who could pay for them. Unless..."
    "... You intend to sell them, piece by piece, to various conflicting nations, setting up an Arms race that requires more and more payments and concessions, leaving you rules of the world in all but name."
    "Is that your goal here? Conquest?"

    ">implying future generations won't be considered on a case by case basis"
    ">implying you couldn't slaughter every child bearing woman in the world, and say you're 'saving future generations' from hardship"
    >> Not completely retarded 02/17/12(Fri)03:17 No.17985235

    I have no idea what to say, maybe we should burn a bulb on this?
    >> Anonymous 02/17/12(Fri)03:18 No.17985249
    Damn, she doesn't seem to be meta aware, unlike some other gods here. What do we tell her?
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)03:18 No.17985252
    As you could probably tell, we're not from around here. There are many people on different worlds who have never heard your name. Some of these worlds suffer under tyrany. This is where we plan to use these creatures. If you wish, you may join our cause and help those poor people.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)03:20 No.17985270
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    Woops! You didn't say that.
    You also didn't mention trillions of people or a buyer.

    "Hi! The commitment you're showing to nonlethality is astounding."
    Your Priests and Paladins kneel with you.
    "But I have to ask. What are you planning to DO with all those creatures?"
    >> Slimy Burglar 02/17/12(Fri)03:20 No.17985279
    FUCK. We just broke canon.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)03:21 No.17985287
    No, this is what the Bulbs are for. You broke a bulb. Canon is fine.
    >> Anonymous 02/17/12(Fri)03:22 No.17985296
    I'll take this that we must keep her non-meta aware.
    Nor we can outright lie to her.
    >> Anonymous 02/17/12(Fri)03:23 No.17985305
    We will use them to save the lives of many.
    [One tenth, blah blah, nine tenths, blah...]
    It is better to have and not need, than for us to need and not have, M'lady. Better safe than sorry, and what is done is done.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)03:24 No.17985312
    >I'll take this that we must keep her non-meta aware.
    It is typically a smart choice not to make people meta aware. It is, in fact, one of the fastest ways you'll be out of your job on your ass.

    "Oh! Well, are you considering setting up a community with the remainder? It's such a shame that these creatures have to live in War and Bloodshed constantly, perhaps you could give them Peace and Health?"
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)03:24 No.17985314
    There are many gods from different canons here already, Bootleg. She must have talked to at least a few of them already. At minimum she'd know of Golarion due to the couple dozen pathfinder gods.

    And since some of the pathfinder gods cover multiple worlds (like Asmodeus), she would at minimum know the existance of multiple planes.

    We just need to argue that we need to use them to save the people of another plane.
    >> Anonymous 02/17/12(Fri)03:25 No.17985316
    I think I have something:
    "We plan on not only saving current and future generations, but also the creatures themselves and their descendants from reckless adventurers, and for this, we need to capture as many as we can".
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)03:25 No.17985323
    Or that we will free them on planes of existance that are unpopulated so they could live their lives peacefully.
    >> Anonymous 02/17/12(Fri)03:26 No.17985329
    Yeah, but AFAIK, TSO is meta aware, you mentioned him also being another god somewhere else. Seems that he is the exception.
    >> Slimy Burglar 02/17/12(Fri)03:27 No.17985334
    "We'll drop them off somewhere they won't be a threat to others."
    >> Khronos !V4Hh7i/x2o 02/17/12(Fri)03:27 No.17985339
    Ah, M'lady, a marvelous idea! It will most definately be considered. Are there any other matters on which you need to confer? I mean no disrespect, but I have many things that require my audience.

    [Fuck, I'm good at this.]
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)03:27 No.17985340
    "Ohhh! Dur. My bad. The murder hobos. Of course."
    Elyvilon seems embarassed.
    >"We just need to argue that we need to use them to save the people of another plane."
    Well, be careful. I don't want you to lead them into yet another path of pain and death. Peace may be a noble end, but War is not the means."

    People, please. It's CrawlNethackRoguePlanescape. It takes place on the Outer Planes. There -are- 100 gods here.
    >> Not completely retarded 02/17/12(Fri)03:28 No.17985346
    Can we burn a bulb to bullshit her?

    Brainstorming for speech:
    We make them fight for our amusement (Bad, but not unbelieveable or canonbreaking)
    We are collecting them to study.
    We're making a giant zoo.
    Our god kali commanded us to do this.
    We're talent agents for the galaxies biggest circus.
    We're doing this to win a bet.
    We're fighting the dwarves that were building the vube with them.
    >> Khronos !V4Hh7i/x2o 02/17/12(Fri)03:30 No.17985353
    [Oh god, my ribs...]
    [You, sir, get an internet]
    >> Anonymous 02/17/12(Fri)03:30 No.17985361
    Well, everything explained.
    >murder hobos
    I'm going to steal this.

    Hilarious, but I think we already solved this.
    >> Khronos !V4Hh7i/x2o 02/17/12(Fri)03:31 No.17985363
    [Can we spend a willpower to get a story direction here? Things are getting kinda dry...]
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)03:32 No.17985372
    >Or that we will free them on planes of existance that are unpopulated so they could live their lives peacefully
    >"We'll drop them off somewhere they won't be a threat to others."
    "That seems like a much better plan than starting another War. I thank you."

    >Ah, M'lady, a marvelous idea! It will most definately be considered. Are there any other matters on which you need to confer? I mean no disrespect, but I have many things that require my audience.
    "Please. Your Audience is with the Orb and with anyone who can help you obtain it. Right now, that'd be Me, yes?"

    "For my Counsel, I'd suggest you be wary of the realm of Zot. It's got multiple powerful creatures, even more powerful than the ones you've already faced. You could need help."

    "But before I grant you that, I have more questions of you!"
    "That Spaceship you have. What is its purpose? I understand the little one - gets you from place to place. But the big one, the one with all the creatures ... what use is it to have something that can never touch ground again?"

    >Bootleg quest
    Haha no. There is no story. Just an NPC to chat to.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)03:35 No.17985391
    "Most notably, I notice you are ALL adventurers. This can't be your first adventure. What is it that you have done in the past?"

    "Finally, I notice you work for the God of Change, Power and Death. She SCARES me. Please tell me how a pacifist such as you came to worship one such as her?"
    >> Anonymous 02/17/12(Fri)03:35 No.17985395
    "The small one and the big one work in tandem to transport the former denizens of the dungeon from place to place. Even places far away.".
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)03:37 No.17985408
    "But wouldn't..."
    "Oh, I suppose you're right. Better to have it that way, than risk some goddamn adventurers breaking into your Creature cell. As far as I know, at least adventurers can't reach the Stars."

    >> Khronos !V4Hh7i/x2o 02/17/12(Fri)03:38 No.17985418
    >Most notably...
    What matters is today, M'Lady. A characteristic trait of the greatest heroes, is to put aside the past for the greater good.

    >Finally, i noti...
    Ah, I am no god myself, must've been divine intervention itself. I do not claim to know the truth behind these matters.
    >> Anonymous 02/17/12(Fri)03:38 No.17985421
    Uh, looks like we need Kali to reassure her we are the "good" guys. We need set them in good relations, to make Elyvilon not be afraid of Kali.
    "We have practised non lethal methods and planned this mission for years"
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)03:39 No.17985429
    Actually, we don't worship Kali. She's our friend. We helped her when she had a time of need, and she's helping us save these creatures. While she may seem scary, she's rather nice once you get to know her.
    >> Khronos !V4Hh7i/x2o 02/17/12(Fri)03:40 No.17985443
    [When in doubt, play dumb.]
    [Reeeeeeeeeally dumb.]
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)03:43 No.17985464
    >What matters is today, M'Lady. A characteristic trait of the greatest heroes, is to put aside the past for the greater good.
    But the Past tells us a lot about the Present and where we will head in the Future. I would have you tell me what you did.
    >I do not claim to know the truth behind these matters.
    BS you don't know. You don't just wake up one morning drunk and find out you joined a religion the preceding night. Are the circumstances of your joining ... less than ideal?

    >"We have practised non lethal methods and planned this mission for years"
    I can see that! You've done in mere hours what takes DAYS for most adventurers to do. That's why I NEED to talk to you. You're our best chance yet of getting that orb, and I need to know how I should help you.

    >Actually, we don't worship Kali. She's our friend. We helped her when she had a time of need, and she's helping us save these creatures. While she may seem scary, she's rather nice once you get to know her.
    Kali nods.
    "... You help GODS?"
    The Royal Jelly Blorps.
    "Well, in that case ..."
    "The Abyss is without a ruler. However, Xom has set his eye on adding it to his domain. It would be best for All of us at the temple, if you could somehow ... Not let that happen."
    >> Anonymous 02/17/12(Fri)03:43 No.17985469
    This whole "Bluffing a god" business is making me tense. And I'm really the only Anonymous left here?
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)03:45 No.17985478
    "Now, I don't care if you help Kali take the abyss."
    "I don't care if you help Trog and Vehumet take the abyss."
    "Hell I wouldn't give a shit if Armok took the goddamn abyss. Just DON'T. LET IT. FALL. TO XOM."

    Elyvion is still curious about your past/history!
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)03:46 No.17985481
    On our previous adventure, we found a fortress of iron and machinery that was being attacked by demons. We rescued many people, and even reunited a family.

    The adventure before that, we were hired by an aspiring artist to save several ladies from a horrible fate. This is where we met Kali. Ah, the memories. . .

    Do you have anything in mind, or would you like us to figure something out?
    >> Anonymous 02/17/12(Fri)03:46 No.17985483
    >Xom has set his eye on adding it to his domain
    I blame this on Lugonu being a dumbfuck and doing a suicide run. Lets ask the guys at Darwin how much time until a Lugonu replacement comes, to take rightful possesion of his realm.
    We may need to bluff Lugonu's dead, though.
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)03:48 No.17985500
    If we were to get to the area where Lugonu died, would it be possible to resurrect him so he could take his job back over?
    >> Anonymous 02/17/12(Fri)03:48 No.17985505
    Also, I wonder how would look an Abyss dominated by Xom. I didn't think it was possible for it to get any more random.
    >> Anonymous 02/17/12(Fri)03:49 No.17985510
    Let this be our "past and history".
    >> Khronos !V4Hh7i/x2o 02/17/12(Fri)03:50 No.17985516
    Depends. Who knows "Arise-ga"?
    ...That's what i thought. Other options?
    [INB4 Phoenix Downs, etc]
    Like shit, I'm sure.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)03:50 No.17985519
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    "Ah, adventurers your whole life? I honestly don't blame you. Good times, good times."
    "And the rest of you, what did you do?"

    >Do you have anything in mind, or would you like us to figure something out?
    "A God of Chaos and Translocations ((teleports)). Find anyone like that, ask them to take the Abyss as their domain. Of the gods that visit our temple, we currently DON'T have any translocation gods."

    >Also, I wonder how would look an Abyss dominated by Xom.
    >> Khronos !V4Hh7i/x2o 02/17/12(Fri)03:51 No.17985526
    >God of Chaos
    ...That actually fits this kind of thing really well.
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)03:52 No.17985534
    A chaotic god of travel. . .

    Like Desna, our Theurge's god?

    >> Anonymous 02/17/12(Fri)03:53 No.17985538
    I still say to poke the TG for a Lugonu replacement. Except that we may not need to fake Lugonu's death now, as long we bring here someone that is not Lugonu (would that cause distortions? This canon is tremendously fucked)

    That's Xom alright
    >> Not completely retarded 02/17/12(Fri)03:53 No.17985539
    More speech brainstorming:
    It's cheaper to build it like that.
    The man who paid for the design crew suffered from a terrible fear of dirt, so he had it made unable to land.
    Kali is just working with us, we don't actually worship her. In fact, our religion forbids the worship of gods.
    Relax, she's pretty chill once you get to know her.
    We are actually working for another god who is friends with her.
    She can't stand those bloody murder hobos either, so she's helping us with this.
    She want's to keep the worlds population up, so that as many people die as possible, so she needs to keep things somewhat stable.
    She's working with our circus to help collect animals for the acts, she just likes our shows and is lending a hand.

    Well, i guess i took too long replying, i'll post them anyway since you seemed to like the last list.

    Let's go interview gods for the position.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)03:55 No.17985546
    "I would choose from among you a Champion to serve me, and invoke my power. What history do each of your fellow travellers have?"

    Your team gleefully reports in.
    Auror: "Killing dark wizards."
    Blastoise: "Toise." (Killing Pokemon in gladitorial combat)
    Cleric of Desna: "VGD"
    Mentor: "Killing Orcs. Lots of Orcs."
    Minecrafter: "making mob grinders"
    WoW team 1: "Killing people and taking their stuff."
    WoW team 2: "^ But faster and better"
    You: "Making sure those guys keep their shit together long enough to take things ALIVE."

    You're pretty sure Elyvilon just facepalmed.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)03:57 No.17985555

    Scripted events, ho!

    You ask the Cleric of Desna to ask her god whether her god wants the abyss.
    Desna replies:
    "Chaotic GOOD"
    "Chaotic EVIL"
    "no ty".
    Damn. It was a foolproof plan, too. You'll have to ask back at base.

    "How long do we have until Xom finishes his takeover?"
    "You have at least a month."
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)03:57 No.17985563
    What does VGD stand for?
    >> Anonymous 02/17/12(Fri)03:58 No.17985571
    Tell the guys at Darwin to hurry the fuck up.
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)03:59 No.17985577
    Mostly asking because what our Cleric has been doing since lvl 1 has mostly been buffing, healing, and debuffing and I'm curious as to why he's not suitable.
    >> Not completely retarded 02/17/12(Fri)03:59 No.17985578
    What if we just kill or loot Xom? Would that work?
    Planning time!
    How many stun bombs does it take to knock out a god?
    How many worshippers does xom have?
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)04:00 No.17985581
    >Let's go interview gods for the position.
    You have 2 gods. Kali, who says she wants to get right the fuck out of this goddamn Canon once you're done with the Orb.
    You ask Jiyva.
    Jiyva is willing to become God of the Abyss, but fears that if his only intelligent follower falls prey to the monsters in the abyss, he will die, and Jiyva cannot lead the abyss from outside.

    >What does VGD stand for?
    I don't know.

    Because she already worships Desna.
    >> Anonymous 02/17/12(Fri)04:02 No.17985593
    According to Wiktionary:
    (Internet slang, text messaging) Initialism of vad gör du? (“what are you doing? what’s up?”).

    That's oddly fitting.

    Can we buff TRJ into immortality?
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)04:02 No.17985598
    >How many stun bombs does it take to knock out a god?
    Er, anywhere from 40 for Ereshkigal to goddamn 160 for Antaeus.

    >What if we just kill or loot Xom? Would that work?
    Your META-ASSISTANT pops up.
    This seems to be a bad idea.

    Would you like to contact BASE for further ideas?
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)04:02 No.17985602
    That's fair.

    Well, what about us directly? I'll go down with them and heal them if that's what she wishes.
    >> Khronos !V4Hh7i/x2o 02/17/12(Fri)04:03 No.17985607
    This, SO MUCH THIS
    ...Something tells me "No"
    So, time for a Champion of Jiyva
    pretty please.
    >> Anonymous 02/17/12(Fri)04:03 No.17985609
    Is there any con to contacting base?
    >> Anonymous 02/17/12(Fri)04:05 No.17985618
    [Champion, lolno.]
    >> Slimy Burglar 02/17/12(Fri)04:05 No.17985619
    Let's contact base, if only to see how they react to our report.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)04:05 No.17985621
    >Can we buff TRJ into immortality?
    TRJ is sadly mortal. You can, however, shove him into a Metal Box and throw him in the Abyss.
    TRJ seems upset at this idea.

    >Is there any con to contacting base?
    There are no downsides to it and it can be done easily. Of course you have a comm drive, you're looters. "Comin' in hot with a phat load of goods, prep the receivin' bays" is like saying Hello to you.
    >> Not completely retarded 02/17/12(Fri)04:06 No.17985624
    Could we have the other gods go on a recruitment drive for followers for jiyva?
    How many things in the abyss can tunnel or teleport? Maybe we could shove him in a fortified area so he's safe?
    Do slimes need to breathe air? could we start up the FTW machine again to clear the abyss?
    Should we put up help wanted ads wherever it is gods hang out?

    Well, i guess we should hand this problem over to the guys at base.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)04:06 No.17985628
    >Let's contact base, if only to see how they react to our report.
    "Sup Skyranger UM1. How goes the mission?"
    "Fuck, lemme put you through to Human Resources."
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)04:07 No.17985636

    This guy could also work. He's a chaotic neutral god of travel who's a primordial being of darkness.
    >> Anonymous 02/17/12(Fri)04:08 No.17985638
    Alright, there are two chaotic gods left in here, thus suitable for Abyss god: Makhleb and Nemelex Xobeh (god damn randomly generated names with some vocals inserted).
    And the former seems to be the most fit one.
    >> Anonymous 02/17/12(Fri)04:08 No.17985645
    How big is TRJ? Use "Dimminuendo" magic, and put him somewhere safe.
    Pocket, lockbox...
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)04:08 No.17985646
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    H-h-h-hello L-l-l-loooterss.
    I'm t-t-told that y... y-you have a mission worthy of a Ggggooooooddddd. A Ggggooooddd of chaos and t-teleportation? I know j-just the person. Stay right there.

    >Shodan/Glados merger. Runs Human Resources.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)04:10 No.17985668
    Blastoise cannot wear the Green Mail as he is too big, and sharing a shell with an acidic jelly without it is not smart.

    >How many things in the abyss can tunnel or teleport?
    Everything teleports randomly. It's kind of the abyss's thing.
    ... Which is why the Box idea is stupid and I shouldn't have suggested it. My bad.
    >> Anonymous 02/17/12(Fri)04:10 No.17985669
    Shit's on now.
    >> Khronos !V4Hh7i/x2o 02/17/12(Fri)04:12 No.17985682
    ...Can we put said mail on the jelly, shrink him, and then do stuff?
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)04:13 No.17985690
    "Hello, Human Resources Level 2 here.
    Yeah, we have a god that can do that. Called the "Vadrigar", from Quake. Chaotic guys, like bloodshed, make Arenas full of teleporters and stock 'em with infinitely respawning weapons, send respawning people to die there for sport.
    Also, SOMETHING may have tapped the line. Did you hear any distortion while you were on hold with me?"
    >> Anonymous 02/17/12(Fri)04:13 No.17985695
    I don't think Blastoise would enjoy pacing the Abyss for the rest of his bery mortal life.
    >> Anonymous 02/17/12(Fri)04:14 No.17985698

    >Abyss full of random teleporters and weapons
    I'm OK with this.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)04:15 No.17985701
    He'd run out of PP too quick.



    #1. Jiyva
    Jiyva requires a RECRUITMENT DRIVE, but can become god of the Abyss.
    #2. Glados/SHODAN
    Head of Human Resources. Is willing to send a shard of itself to the Abyss.
    #3. Vadrigar
    Runs Quake 3 Arena. Will turn the Abyss from an endless plane of bloodshed and death, to an endless plane of bloodshed, death, and rocket launchers.
    #4. Desna
    Desna is not Evil, but if you tried hard enough, you might talk her into this.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)04:17 No.17985708
    #5. Xom
    xom pls go
    >> Anonymous 02/17/12(Fri)04:17 No.17985711
    I vote 3. And Shodan/GLaDOS should be the last option for anything.
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)04:18 No.17985714
    Well, it wouldn't necessarily have to be evil. She is also a god of creation, she could alter it so the area isn't quite so hostile.

    Like the opposite of how Xom would do it. Xom would make dicks grow from the walls.
    >> Khronos !V4Hh7i/x2o 02/17/12(Fri)04:19 No.17985722

    Maybe Kirby? He could hold TRJ in his stomach indefinately.

    ...Kirby would be a nice party member.
    >> Not completely retarded 02/17/12(Fri)04:20 No.17985733
    Turnign the abyss from an endless plain of death and bloodshed into an endless plain of death, bloodshef, and TESTING?
    If we send a shard of glados, it could farm the monsters in the abyss, while the others might not.

    Still better than xom.
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)04:21 No.17985736
         File: 1329470477.gif-(1 KB, 62x66, Rainbow_devil_sprite.gif)
    1 KB
    Kirby would consume it and become Slime Kirby.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)04:21 No.17985739
    Have you seen how CLEAN the facility looks?
    If anything, there's going to be a whole lot LESS blood.
    And a whole lot more incineration.
    >> Khronos !V4Hh7i/x2o 02/17/12(Fri)04:22 No.17985742
    Still, epic party idea is epic.
    [BTW, Kirby can hold things w/out swallowing, you derpface.]
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)04:23 No.17985745
    Whenever someone says "Epic party idea is Epic", I as a DM hear "The path to delicious fanboy tears is particularily easy today."
    >> Anonymous 02/17/12(Fri)04:24 No.17985750
    Wise words.
    >> Not completely retarded 02/17/12(Fri)04:25 No.17985753
    Just think of all the science that could be done with an unlimited supply of test subjects!
    It's be like robot heaven.

    I like either rocket launchers or science, does it cost DOSH to buy a god to fix this?
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)04:26 No.17985756
    have you seen the inside of Kirby's stomach? It's infinite!

    >> Anonymous 02/17/12(Fri)04:26 No.17985757
    ...Please be straightforward, I'm terrible at internet wordplay.
    Is that a no? Or a "That would be a bad idea"?
    ...Khronos votes for GlaDoS.
    BUT, we need to talk to her about her methods before proceeding.
    >> Anonymous 02/17/12(Fri)04:27 No.17985760
    I'm still wary to let SHODAN/GLADOS do anything, what with >>17979640
    >> Anonymous 02/17/12(Fri)04:27 No.17985761
    Well, thanks for proving my point, double derpface.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)04:29 No.17985767
    Not to say that Kirby's a BAD idea for a party member. He's extremely versatile.

    Yes, but the cost of a God matches the cost of having a God get dead, so you break even.

    Abyss becomes the Slime Abyss, and is now 100% more of a cunt to run through.
    The floor is now TESTING
    Week-long opening tourney for all employees! The new map is INFINITE! Come and frag out.
    The Abyss is now a hub of travel.
    The Walls are now Dicks
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)04:32 No.17985778
    He still consumes it! That's where everything he's EVER swallowed goes. Damn, that place must have a lot of Smash Dolls.

    Jiyva would be bad, we'd lose his dosh value
    Gladan would be bad because of the whole "need to be watched"
    Vadrigar would be the most epic Quake tourny ever.
    Desna would be nice. Can always use a hub of travel.
    Xom. . . fuck no. To borrow a phrase from another quest. We don't need the realm of Bernie.
    >> Khronos !V4Hh7i/x2o 02/17/12(Fri)04:32 No.17985779
    Desna, with GlaDoS as backup.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)04:34 No.17985789
    Let's see.
    1 for Jiyva
    2 for the Vadrigar
    2 for Desna
    2 for Shodan

    Note: Desna may well REFUSE, as her domains are quite different from the Abyss's. I want whoever wishes to recruit Desna to roll a 1d100.
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)04:35 No.17985793
    rolled 51 = 51

    Lets see how it works.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)04:36 No.17985798
    Desna seems upset at the idea of being tied down to one place, unable to wander the planes :(
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)04:37 No.17985808
    Keep wandering, and turn this place into a hub so others can travel as well.
    >> Anonymous 02/17/12(Fri)04:38 No.17985817
    So, it's Vadrigar or Gladan.
    I still vote for Vadrigar. He's also the "TG approved" one.
    >> Khronos !V4Hh7i/x2o 02/17/12(Fri)04:38 No.17985825
    rolled 57 = 57

    Rolling for Desna's Favor.
    >> Not completely retarded 02/17/12(Fri)04:40 No.17985834
    I wonder if we'll get paid extra for turning the abyss into another Guard outpost?
    I think we'd be safest with the rocket god, as long as he works for tg and isn't just an untrained god.
    >> Slimy Burglar 02/17/12(Fri)04:40 No.17985835
    Can I throw in my two cents and vote for Vadrigar?
    >> Dogstar !!sKGW1u0HNtI 02/17/12(Fri)04:40 No.17985837
    rolled 66 = 66

    god. literally. None of these options are good.
    Jivya: only champion gets eaten, withers up, blows away.
    ShoDOS: Eventually someone gets out with some of her advanced tech. Xom gets his hands on some of it. Cue dicks.
    Vadrigar: Someone gets out with a rocket launcher. Xom gets it. PENIS LAUNCHER, BALL GRENADES
    Desna: As soon as the Abyss becomes a hub of travel everything inside it is going to want out. The team will need to IMMEDIATELY evacuate.

    My vote goes to Vadrigar, with a request that we be allowed to send down and pull up troops from the Abyss at our leisure, so anyone who respawns and earns EXP can get beaucoup buckets of the stuff.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)04:41 No.17985845
    For now, you have ELYVILON'S BLESSING:
    >If you would TPK, Elyvilon will save you. She will only do this once per level.

    Kali also reports that you have access to A dance with death
    >All troops gain the benefit of Death's door for a few turns

    He works for the G-man, but close enough. G-man and you swap employees all the damn time.

    WEEK LONG QUAKE TOURNEY either way, just that either the Vadri piss off after it's done and Desna takes over if that's who won.
    >> Khronos !V4Hh7i/x2o 02/17/12(Fri)04:43 No.17985855
    rolled 28 = 28

    I say we get Mr Auror to use Imperio on Desna.
    Worth a shot, eh? If 90+,all of us who rolled for desna should get a reroll.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)04:43 No.17985857
    Kali's other 2 abilities haven't come into play.
    "Raise fallen enemies/allies to fight alongside you" doesn't work because THERE HAVEN'T BEEN ANY OF THOSE.
    "Smite living" hasn't been used, since you've been going for Capture Living.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)04:44 No.17985867
    There are bad suggestions, there are terrible suggestions, and then there's Raidah.
    You just went full Raidah.
    >> Khronos !V4Hh7i/x2o 02/17/12(Fri)04:45 No.17985873
    ...it was a joke...
    >> Anonymous 02/17/12(Fri)04:45 No.17985877
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)04:46 No.17985881
    In any case, Elyvilon bids you farewell, and says that she'll do her best to protect you.

    Kali pipes up.
    "You know she's gonna flip her shit when she finds out who you're selling those to, ya?"
    "Meh whatev, will be gone by then."
    "Suppose you're right."
    >> Anonymous 02/17/12(Fri)04:47 No.17985890
    Crisis averted. Well, partially.
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)04:48 No.17985897
    We need to bring along The Nameless One next time. We'd have been to recruit her, that's how good he is.
    >> Khronos !V4Hh7i/x2o 02/17/12(Fri)04:49 No.17985903
    Crisis postponed temporarily.
    Shits gonna hit the fan later
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)04:49 No.17985905
    Damnit! Recette! Elyvilon can have Recette be her champion.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)04:51 No.17985921
    Every single version of him that we pick up goes straight to Human Resources. He IS a good diplomat. Too good, in fact.

    Oh please, it's crawl, shit always hits the fan.

    I'mma archive the thread. Stand back lads, gonna get this shit up
    >> Anonymous 02/17/12(Fri)04:52 No.17985931
    The session is ending now? because I need sleep.
    >> Khronos !V4Hh7i/x2o 02/17/12(Fri)04:53 No.17985933
    Something tlls me this sort of activity would be better in a "Chat"-like environent.
    Don't they have chatclients ment for P&PRPGs?
    builtin dicerolls and such.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)04:53 No.17985936
    It ended a few hours ago. I typically end a session by letting the players bullshit with the NPCs because why not? Builds flavor.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)04:55 No.17985943
    Players go "Gleep hurp blorp" at NPC, NPC goes "Horp glurp bleep" at them, they think they're doing something story-important and all is well.

    Ultimately Ely was going to give you the 1up either way.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)04:56 No.17985947
    And as for the Abyss, there won't be any effect on your missions from it. Though different shit will happen in interludes.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)04:58 No.17985962
    My E-mail's in the email thread.
    If I bypassed your input by making the thread go too quickly, or if the thread was too boring by waiting for consensus, let me know.
    And if you want me to include your favourite weeaboo fan characters of japanese slice-of-life animes, I will say "Lol no" at you.
    >> Khronos !V4Hh7i/x2o 02/17/12(Fri)04:58 No.17985964
    Seriously, consider Kirby.
    He could use his swallow [SSB Style, not "Eat"ing them] to hold items, copy enemies, copy teammates...
    Plus, the Warpstar could be useful sometime.
    Or his ability to call "Other Kirbies"
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)05:01 No.17985979
    Kirby's available. You can get one from his games for as low as 40 DOSH with restrictions on the things he can eat, up to 100 DOSH for a truly omnivorous one.
    Figure the 70 DOSH, "eat any enemy roughly my size and jack their power" one is best.
    >> Khronos !V4Hh7i/x2o 02/17/12(Fri)05:02 No.17985985
    At the risk of sounding completely uninformed and dumb...
    Where are you getting these figures? Is there a list?
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)05:03 No.17985990
    I make shit up randomly.
    I have the Autism so I put numbers next to everything.
    >> Khronos !V4Hh7i/x2o 02/17/12(Fri)05:06 No.17986004
    Well then, what is DOSH standing for?
    How do we go about adding these members, should we agree on them?
    Would you kill me for suggesting we add a DBZ character?
    If not, how much DOSH would a Mid-Buu Saga Goku cost?
    >> Anonymous 02/17/12(Fri)05:08 No.17986009
    We are looters, not "destroyers of everything in sight". Maybe you are in the wrong division of the TG.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)05:08 No.17986010
    DOSH stands for Money. it is a unit of currency.

    Buu-saga DBZ character will run you easily into the 500 DOSH mark. Taking planet-wrecking shit with you on routine missions is a little odd.
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)05:08 No.17986013
    DOSH is money, cash credits
    We suggest someone, then talk about it.
    We might.
    Ha, ha, no. We can't afford him in the main quest. How do you expect him here.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)05:09 No.17986015
    Because you have more money than the main quest? ;)
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)05:10 No.17986025
    Well, we do now.
    What are we at if we were to leave now?
    >> Khronos !V4Hh7i/x2o 02/17/12(Fri)05:12 No.17986038
    Well, maybe later the abyss needs to become "The Crater"
    IDK, just curiosity. This is my first time on /tg/, and i'm sure i will return.

    ALSO, i just scrolled up.
    The left half of that scrabble board says "Aether", working on the right. [No spoilers pls]
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)05:13 No.17986041
    Somewhere near 10500 mark?
    And yes, THIS is what we call riding the Exponential.
    Get 100 Dosh, earn 800 dosh
    Get 800 dosh, earn 15,000 dosh.
    Get 15,000 dosh, earn 200,000 dosh.

    Spoilers: Your next mission is "Loot a planet".
    No, not "loot the things that are on the planet".
    The planet.
    You loot it.
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)05:13 No.17986043
    Head to http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive.html then. It's got the best of /tg/.
    >> Anonymous 02/17/12(Fri)05:17 No.17986063
    >"Loot a planet"
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)05:18 No.17986068
    Ok, so we'll need that planet moving device from Diebuster, hook it to a transpace drive, and we're done.
    >> Khronos !V4Hh7i/x2o 02/17/12(Fri)05:20 No.17986073
    We're... Looting... a...Planet.
    Well then. I need to think this one over...

    We have an assload of DOSH, is anyone against getting a 80-DOSH Kirby? I think it would be fun, and it would shut me up significantly.

    [>Spend 2k DOSH on Kirby
    >Use sucking force to move planets]
    i fucking wish, lol.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)05:21 No.17986084
    Kirby. The cutest world-destroying force, narrowly beating the Katamari and the 2 million kilometer tall (x), where (x) is any generic sexual fetish.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)05:22 No.17986089
    Any case, good to have you on board, Khronos. But if this is your first time on /tg/, might as well lose the tripcode. Identity isn't particularily important in quest threads except to stop people impersonating the GM. Heck, Cerebrate Anon and Metaquest OP do fine without tripcodes.
    >> Khronos 02/17/12(Fri)05:24 No.17986096
    Meh, it's a habit.
    I just wish i had my custom "AWEsomEEEE" trip with me...
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)05:25 No.17986098
    see http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oR6k5ZPezeE on why Kirby would be a bad idea.

    Also, Bootleg makes a good point. People here have a nasty habit of attacking those with Trips if they're not quest runners.

    Also, Giant Naked Rei was a great way to destroy a world. . .
    Mmmm, tang.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)05:25 No.17986101
    You mean like the ones that say !shazbot and !doubles and stuff like that?
    >> Khronos !V4Hh7i/x2o 02/17/12(Fri)05:27 No.17986113
    Exactly. Want one?
    Not gonna lie, that was epic.
    ...But no, that's not how it would turn out.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)05:28 No.17986120
    Meh. Trip's just something I use to stop people trollin' by jackin' the quest. I don't care much for 'em myself.
    >> Not completely retarded 02/17/12(Fri)05:29 No.17986126
    Destroying worlds is a sign of failure.
    If we're doing our job right, we'd just shove the world and whatever on it made it need destroying into seperate boxes and let logistics deal with it, like we did with those flying weapons.
    We're looters, not fighers.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)05:30 No.17986132
    Well sometimes you're fighters.
    I mean, if someone paid you more dosh than you'd get from Looting your opponent, you'd totally kill him.
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)05:31 No.17986137
    Would we have dibs on the body? We could rez him afterwards and get paid twice.
    >> Not completely retarded 02/17/12(Fri)05:32 No.17986140
    Or we could pretend to do the killing while actually using a soul gem to loot the target, and once we get paid for killing them loot the guy paying us, for an extra bonus for removing a competitor, right?
    >> Anonymous 02/17/12(Fri)05:32 No.17986144
         File: 1329474757.gif-(3 KB, 180x118, 180px-Durandal_Logo.gif)
    3 KB
    >God of Chaos and Teleportation
    Fucking *ding*, bitches.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)05:32 No.17986145
    Now that's what I'm talkin' about!
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)05:33 No.17986152
    Although, if we were to do it that way, I'd go hunt down some other people who want him dead, so I might get paid even 3 or 4 times.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)05:34 No.17986153
    There is a list of people you should never allow any more power than is necessary. Durandal is at the top of that list and second only to the Gravemind.
    >> Khronos !V4Hh7i/x2o 02/17/12(Fri)05:34 No.17986155
    Looters, not fighters...
    Traps, and non-lethal...
    Has anyone put thought into Rikku from FFX?
    Fits the description quite nicely.
    Also, are there limitations to available party members?
    Y'know, as long as they aren't ridiculous?
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)05:36 No.17986163
    Main limitations.
    We have a limited amount of DOSH so we want our money to go far. That's the main reason why our Cleric is multiclassed as a Theurge. It'll give her access to every single spell short of the lvl 9 ones. And we could probably find her some spell enhancers to get her access to those too.
    >> Not completely retarded 02/17/12(Fri)05:40 No.17986186
    Hypothetical: How would we go about looting the following:
    A planet.
    A solar system.
    A galaxy
    A timeline.
    A universe
    A canon
    High command
    A crossover world
    Black ops
    The meta
    >> Khronos !V4Hh7i/x2o 02/17/12(Fri)05:43 No.17986196
    >Er, ...Okay.
    >How in the...?
    >Well, you see...
    >No comment
    >Implying we don't already have more power than them.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)05:45 No.17986211
    Party members: OP either needs to know the character, or at least have a link to a site that shows their canon position and their limitations.

    For instance, someone wanted Negi and someone else wanted a Tachikoma. Those are my two vetos so far because Negi's a Canon S.U.E. and I know how people obsess about Tachikomas.
    I'm not saying everything japanese is bad. Most of it's good. But if you have a way of skipping over the Shoujo and Sentai and going straight to the animes about how awkward interpersonal relationships are, you're likely on Veto territory.

    >A planet.
    Hook a drive to it, drag it into Transpace guard space.
    >A solar system.
    Close all stargates/wormholes connected to it, replace with transpace guard ones.
    >A galaxy
    Have a fleet of no less than 1000, and ideally 1 million, looter teams each tasked with a cluster of star systems.
    >A timeline.
    Find a way to travel through time.
    For every particular point in time, have a plan to loot it.
    Repeat until you have looted time.
    >A universe
    Repeat Galaxy and Timeline with larger teams. Perhaps invent some type of Von Neumann looting machine.
    >A canon
    Find the Author avatar, and convince him to do what you want.
    >High command
    Select the "Evil" option when you reach the S-rank missions
    >A crossover world
    You already ARE.
    >Black ops
    Select the "Evil" option when you reach the S-rank missions
    >The meta
    Select the "Evil" option when you reach the S-rank missions, then complete the final one.
    >> Not completely retarded 02/17/12(Fri)05:46 No.17986214
    That's a rather good answer.
    In a more serious note, let's think up ways to loot a planet, since we're apparently going to have to do that soon.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)05:46 No.17986215
    Note: Good missions are canonical.
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)05:49 No.17986225
    Giant mecha from Gunbuster. They were planning on using Earth as a Missile
    >Solar system
    Little harder, we'd probably need one hell of a spell
    Steal Orion's belt (yes, i know this makes me old)
    Find a canon where you can see the threads of time. Take the string you want
    Have Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann stick it in a bag of holding
    Ask Back Ops how they do it.
    >High Command
    Join Firemen
    That one's easy
    >Black Ops
    Have us all join black ops, take-over after a while
    >The meta
    Send out a shitload of moron looter teams and have them sell stuff to us.
    >> Khronos !V4Hh7i/x2o 02/17/12(Fri)05:51 No.17986235
    And evil ones are "Your princess is in another fucking dimension"?

    I suggest we get a "Blank" ANBU soldier, from Naruto universe. He needs to be Jonin, near Sanin in skill level
    ...All in favor?
    I see what you did there, you ballchinian dirtbag.
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)05:57 No.17986258
    We're the Transpace Guard, not the Time and Space Administration.

    You some kind of weeaboo traitor?
    >> Khronos !V4Hh7i/x2o 02/17/12(Fri)05:59 No.17986267
    Naw, just making a suggestion.
    Anbus are powerful as fuck, and can be molded into any kind of soldier you deisre.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)05:59 No.17986268
    And if you must ask, no, I'm not shitting you.

    D-rank, where you are now, is basically what you're doing now. Going into stable canons with great knowledge and few strict requirements, grabbing the lewt, getting out.
    C-rank is more of the same, but may involve more powerful shit, delegating sub-commanders or otherwise managing an empire, ruined canons where everything's up for grabs, more complex missions with stricter fail requirements, and places where you don't have any info on what you're getting into.
    B-rank is requests division. Agents here are modified so they can effectively run hundreds of parallel "threads" remotely - so 200 straight days of looting, to them, might only take 1 day in reality. These are your heavy lifting looters, and most looters aspire to be here.
    A-rank is WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU ARE division. Covet the invisible, Grab the untouchable, Heist the unbreakable, Steal the impossible, Row row loot the powah.
    S-rank is Classified, citizen.
    >> Not completely retarded 02/17/12(Fri)06:06 No.17986287
    Carmen sandiego can loot concepts, right? That might lead to some interesting looting.
    What comes after s-rank?
    Can the metameta be looted?
    I read that this setting is meta all the way down, can we loot the concept of down and then, since it's just the meta because there is no down for it to go all the way, loot the setting itself?
    What would happen if we hired carmen sandiego, threw her through that sclockverse wormhole duplicator, and then looted the concept of looting itself?
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)06:06 No.17986289
    D-rank - Rob a canon
    C-rank - Grab anything that moves from an imploding canon or stuff like stealing Spike right as he dies.
    B-rank - C-rank jobs done 100 at a time.
    A-rank - Steal Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann. Then go bang the women.

    Good summary?
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)06:09 No.17986298
    Pretty much. Once you leave D-rank you are less of an exponential DOSHinator and work more on the "How quickly and efficiently can you get shit done with limited resources" system.
    Do well on that system, get put straight into the "These are our Veteran looters, they get ALL our shit" rank.
    >> Not completely retarded 02/17/12(Fri)06:09 No.17986299
    I'd think that stealing the tengen toppa gurren lagann would be easier than a rank, seeing as we could just go in early in the series and replace the main characters with tg lookalikes, and then have them act out canon then leave after the end of the series.
    Or just go in long before the series and loot the plans and production facilities.
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)06:11 No.17986311
    plans. . .
    Lookalike. . .

    And who's going to act as a Spiral Power battery?
    Who's going to create a Galaxy sized mecha out of pure energy?

    There's no plans for the big one. The smaller ones would be far easier, but for Tengen, you'd have to join the crew, make the battle go easier, and look the whole damn mecha, and it's crew, and brainwash them all into helping us.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)06:13 No.17986319
    As for A-rank, these are the Hero looters. You wish you could be like them. But only once in a decade, if that. And even then, they might as well be legend.

    For instance, a typical A-rank mission might be, "This canon has a particular law of physics that we want. Loot it." or "Time here flows particularily slowly. That would be useful to those of us who want more reaction time or time to work. Loot Time."
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)06:15 No.17986325
    "The Concept of Happiness powers many attacks, some of which are overwhelmingly powerful. We want you to loot Happiness.", or "This place was utterly destroyed, and everything in it of value was irrevocably lost to us. Loot those things of value anyway."
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)06:15 No.17986326
    "My wife wants The Warp as a birthday present" etc.
    You know, crazy impossible bullshit.
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)06:16 No.17986327
    or "Go loot Yahweh", "Go steal THE POWER OF FRIENDSHIP", "We want The Heart of the Cards", "Bring us 40lbs of luck"
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)06:17 No.17986331
    >Only 40lbs
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)06:18 No.17986336
    It was next to the 40lb box of rape. Nobody would miss it!
    >> Khronos !V4Hh7i/x2o 02/17/12(Fri)06:19 No.17986342
    >Steal Dragonballs
    >Summon shenron/:Porunga
    >Loot the ability to grant wishes
    >Repeat for red shenron
    We win.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)06:20 No.17986349
    There comes a time when every man must look inside himself, evaluate what he wants, what he feels, who he is, and come to an epiphany about what he'll do with his life.

    This takes too long. Loot at least 20 kilograms each of Wisdom, Enlightenment, Realization, and Self-discovery, and place them into 10 milligram pills.
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)06:21 No.17986355
    Stupid. . .

    Get a couple hundred Rings of Three Wishes.

    Also, I state once again. We are the Transpace Guard. Anime is the TSA's domain.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)06:22 No.17986357
    >Loot the TSAB
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)06:23 No.17986362
    "We have discovered Agents of legendary looting capacity. We want to have at least two more groups like them working for us."
    >Loot yourself
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)06:24 No.17986369
    The concept of Looting is truly powerful.
    Loot it.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)06:25 No.17986374
    Twice. So we have a spare in case we lose the first.
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)06:26 No.17986375
    Proffessor Farnsworth has figured out that the whole metaverse is actually contained in a box.

    Loot the meta. (Do not stick your penis in the box)
    >> Not completely retarded 02/17/12(Fri)06:26 No.17986380
    The guard doesn't care if a character is from anime, they care that that character gets the job done.
    We don't mind anime characters, we mind the overuse of them, we mind ignoring better options simply because you like a particular character more than the ones that would get the job done better for less cost.
    It's a matter of the right tool for the job.
    >> Khronos !V4Hh7i/x2o 02/17/12(Fri)06:28 No.17986385
    But... We have a Blastoise...
    Fine. So, when's the next thread?
    Damn, i WISH there was a way to perfectly duplicate myself...

    Loot the very concept of existence.
    It has come to our knowledge that looting has been looted.
    Loot the looted "Looted loot", for use with looting looted loot.
    >Yes, that would be correct grammar

    >Yo dawg.jpg
    >> Not completely retarded 02/17/12(Fri)06:28 No.17986386
    That one's almost trivial.
    We just drop into one of the canons where cloning works, and clone the shit out of ourselves, maybe looting spaceships from the canon to put all the extra copies.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)06:31 No.17986394
    I mostly agree. I'm quite willing to send you Power rangers and DBZ chars and Spike and Gundams and Cardcaptors and Mega Mans and shit.
    Like I said, there's a lot of GOOD stuff coming from Japan.

    It's a shame that people keep wanting crazy crap like Yui and Saber. If in the list of your top 5 notable traits, "looks cute" is higher than your job description, you probably aren't a good choice.
    >> Khronos !V4Hh7i/x2o 02/17/12(Fri)06:33 No.17986408
    They're already bounty hunters... why not?
    What other bounty hunters/theives are there that might be available to us?
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)06:33 No.17986409
    Or even easier. You go to a canon with time travel. Go back ten minutes. Loot yourself. Repeat until universe implodes.

    Oh no, some Looters are going back in time and stealing those looter's looted concept of looting. Go Loot the looted looting before the looters loot the looted looting you're looting.

    We could get Fear in Cube. Her job description is killing people. Looking cute is a side effect of that.
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)06:35 No.17986413
    Try finding one that won't utterly ruin the canon if they were to suddenly go walkies. I suppose you could loot Zero from Capcom vs. Tatsunoko after the tourney ends, but where would you get Proto from?
    >> Khronos !V4Hh7i/x2o 02/17/12(Fri)06:37 No.17986422
    From Chaud in Battle Network. He would give zero fucks.

    Also, they're [depending on the specific universe] programs.
    Go bribe Dr Wily.
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)06:37 No.17986424
    Easy enough. Original Canon.
    When X comes along, they didn't say jack shit about what happens to the first generation robots.

    It would just be a waste to use something so pitiful when you can look at our choices.

    Also, what are you going to charge us to use our Theurge again after this mission?
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)06:38 No.17986427
    No idea. Probs get 100 for selling her, buy her back for 200. D&D Chars are powerful at high levels man, and it was a good investment to bring one along as an xp sink.
    >> Not completely retarded 02/17/12(Fri)06:39 No.17986433
    Isn't that only a rank due to the importance, rather than the difficulty?

    "Yo dawg, i heard you like looting so i put a looting in your looting so you can loot while you loot." would be an A rank mission?

    I wonder who it is that's looting all the common sense.

    Why not just pull one of the many cloning tricks, and send one back into the canon of origin?
    >> Bootleg OP !!Cuw+lR6NxOH 02/17/12(Fri)06:40 No.17986438
    ITT: Loads of money.
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)06:42 No.17986445
    "Our employee's are dumbasses. Go loot all the common sense. There's 400 anime canon's there. They won't miss it"
    >> Codeki 02/17/12(Fri)06:45 No.17986460
    If the box contains this universe, I wonder what would happen if you were to reach into the box and take the box? You'd be ripping the box out of the universe, while also having it.
    >> Khronos !V4Hh7i/x2o 02/17/12(Fri)06:48 No.17986470
    You would get "Achievement Unlocked: WTF ARE YOU DOING"
    >> Not completely retarded 02/17/12(Fri)06:48 No.17986471
    What if you tried duplicating the box by one of the numerous methods of duplicating something, like divergent timelines, lolparadox time travel, the metauncertainty principle, etc
    >> Khronos !V4Hh7i/x2o 02/17/12(Fri)06:50 No.17986477
    Quit it, my brain doesn't bend that way.
    >> Khronos !V4Hh7i/x2o 02/17/12(Fri)07:04 No.17986521
    >Reading the archives
    Oh god, my ribs...
    Also, makes me wanna dig out my Renamon folder....
    >> Khronos !V4Hh7i/x2o 02/17/12(Fri)07:18 No.17986564
    WELP, I'll be here for the next thread, hopefully.
    Seeya tomorrow, /tg/!
    >> Anonymous 02/17/12(Fri)08:10 No.17986735

    If Megaman Online weren't cancelled, we wouldn't have had this problem.

    If you wanted to loot Gundams, you would go to those SD Gundam G-Generation canons or Gundam VS canons, but the former is more farming than it is looting.

    That being said, we could go back to the Darkness Beyond Time in the main quest, and recruit echoes of people from the failed/discarded timelines. I wonder how many Madokas, Mamis and Sayakas we could recruit like that.

    If you wanted someone from the Strike Witches canon, there are 2 game canons related to it.

    If you wanted Roy Focker from Macross, you have a bazillion chances to recruit him. One of which is from the pachinko game version which has a sub-canon route of him ALIVE to the finale.
    >> Anonymous 02/17/12(Fri)11:47 No.17987893
    It's not been cancelled, far as I can tell.

    They literally just did an update for the game where they announced two characters.

    But nevertheless, having Zero is a bad idea for looting quest. The main quest, yes, he'd work, but this, we have better choices (remember, we're here to loot. Getting in fights tends to be counterproductive).
    >> Anonymous 02/17/12(Fri)12:00 No.17987994
    Ok, we have a box with the whole universe in it. Then we follow these steps.
    1: Cut a hole in a box
    2: Put your dick in that box
    3: Make her open that box. . .

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