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Well, first off, remember that the Fae used to have all sorts of fabulous and complementary titles. The Kindly Ones, The Gentry, The Fair Folk, The Lords and Ladies, and the like. This wasn't because they were particularly deserving of these titles - it was more that if you said anything that insulted or offended them they'd fucking ruin you and anybody who kinda looked like you.
Fae logic is weird, alien, and nigh incomprehensible to normal people beyond protocols for interacting with mortals (if they're there at all), and yet, it all makes perfect logical sense to the Fae who follow it. They're often actually strictly bound by these rules and sometimes even disappear in puffs of bad form when they violate these rules - if they're even capable of breaking them (or CONCEIVING of breaking them) at all.
To most people, the best way to deal with the Gentry is to not ever get noticed by them in the first place. Never be interesting to the Fae, in a good way or a bad way, because their attention is almost invariably going to end up sucking for you because of how warped their thought processes get. If one's doing something nice for you, pay it back in kind, but not too much or it might get more offended than if you'd stiffed it entirely. If something's being cruel to you, suck it up and try to bear it as stoically as possible and pray they're not the kind that gets their jollies from treating people like Job.
If you've been found interesting by a Fae, congratulations, you're probably already fucked. You're not going to escape it and you're probably not going to thwart it unless it's narratively appropriate that you do. Pray for the one in a million chance that they grant you a no-strings-attached boon instead of some sort of monkey's paw, or instead of taking you back to Faerie to be a conversation piece.