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  • File : 1324090831.jpg-(277 KB, 800x805, Ork Disguise.jpg)
    277 KB Shas'o R'myr !!J5+vjygjQuK 12/16/11(Fri)22:00 No.17241089  
    Would have told the story earlier, but I needed to pack for going home. I have time now. As always, in Deffwotch, the players are Orks who trick the Imperium into thinking they are Spess Mehreens. They fly around looking for fights, loot, and a right good larf.

    Kroz Rubbykonzes - Flyboy
    Grimslag 'Eadmangla - Kommando
    Wazgor Shakbag - Stormboy
    Grakgut Grumwizzlewot - Painboy
    Wurrza Zzappar - Weirdboy

    We started early, since there was much to do, and much to see. Note that 'Eadmangla and Wurrza were unable to show up early (appearing during the fight), and the dialogue will thus appear rather one-sided.

    'Ere we go,
    >> Lich Ted, Master of Nothing 12/16/11(Fri)22:02 No.17241109
    rolled 5 = 5

    Awwww Sheeet. It's Shas'o and dah Deffboyz!
    >> Shas'o R'myr !!J5+vjygjQuK 12/16/11(Fri)22:03 No.17241113
         File1324090995.png-(2.86 MB, 3160x2272, Ork Krooza.png)
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    ...and the chase is over. Such is Warp Travel. Da Looted Krooza exits the Warp over a large gas giant. It's not familiar to the Kill Team or the Black Panthers.

    "CYGROT, WHERE IZZIT?" demands Kroz.
    "Oi dunno if 'e kan 'ear ya in da klozzet..." says Grakgut, heading to retreive Cygrot.
    "Oi told youze ta get'im outta dere ta find dat Garo!" sighs Kroz.

    Chapter Master Johnson lights a cigar. "Where did that bastard go?"

    Kroz decides to check the searchy gubbinz. There's definitely something out there, beside the planet. Something too massive to be missed.
    >> Shas'o R'myr !!J5+vjygjQuK 12/16/11(Fri)22:04 No.17241123
         File1324091064.jpg-(21 KB, 320x206, Aeonic Forge.jpg)
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    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RbwjA0UWWZQ

    "Boss...sumfin' big comin' inta view..." says Uzgob.
    "Wutzit?" asks Grakgut.
    "Tell me sumfin I don't know. Armin torpedoz." notes Kroz.
    "I'z go ready da Kannonz." says Wazgor.
    "...what exactly am I looking at?" asks Brother Captain Dynamite.
    Chapter Consultant Grenadius Skwadsworth turns to the window.
    "That...is another Forge." he says, as the huge silver and black ankh-shaped ship hovers in high orbit, its diameter approaching that of Jupiter, its weaponry gleaming against the blackness of spess.
    Chapter Master Johnson chokes on his cigar. "SAY WHAT?" he yells.
    "OI. DAT FING LOOKS AWFUL FAMILIAR. LIKE DA SHAPE ON ME ARKYOTEK OFFISHUL LOVIN'LY-MARS-CRAFTED SHIELD." says Kroz.
    "Forge?" asks Grakgut.
    "So this is what you fought, Chapter Master...I thought the Aeonic Forge was some sort of weapon?" asks Dynamite.
    "It is. If activated, that station will cause destruction on a galactic scale." says Grenadius.
    The Kill team goes near manic.
    "Dats...sum proppa dakka." says Grakgut.
    "Do you see that gun in front?" Grenadius points to a huge Gauss weapon, "I've seen it crack planets.
    "Welp! Da best way ta keep fings loike dat from hair-a-see iz ta take it!" says Kroz, pooling drool from his open jaw at the sight of the Forge.
    "That thing..." says Grenadius, "It needs to go."
    >> Shas'o R'myr !!J5+vjygjQuK 12/16/11(Fri)22:10 No.17241170
         File1324091413.jpg-(345 KB, 853x797, Looted Emperor.jpg)
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    Kroz on the augurs picks up something further.
    "ZOGGIT, I KEN ALREADY SEE IT FROM'ERE. DAT GIANT GUN IZ DA KROOZA'S NEW CENTERLINE," says Kroz, frantically smashing buttons, "'OLD ON A SEC, GOTS ANUTHA FING OUT DERE."
    "Wot we gonna do wif dat fing?" asks Grakgut.
    "DA BIGGEST WAAAGH IN DA'OONIVERSE!" says Kroz.
    "Duh! Mount it on da Krooza!" says Wazgor.
    "We kuld take da whole Forge!" says Grakgut.
    "So we'ze in agreement! Dat fing can't stay'ere. Dat gun iz a threat to da 'umies until itz firmly attached to da bottom of dis krooza!"

    "I have all the readouts from the LAST Forge here." says Grenadius.
    Comparing Kroz's searchy gubbinz readings with Grenadius's information, there's a signal coming from where the Forge's Reactor should be. A ship, Mechanicus in origin. It appears to be resting on the surface, crashed into the reactor itself.

    "Zoggit boyz, I fink dis might actually BE da actual troo avatar of 'nuff dakka." says Kroz.
    Grakgut slaps Kroz. "AIN'T NO SUCH FING AS 'NUFF DAKKA!"
    "I'm gonna get my Marines ready!" says Chapter Master Johnson, lighting a new cigar, "We're gonna see what the hell is going on down there!"
    "Great Idea, Chapter Master!" says Dynamite. They and Grenadius rush to the launch bays.

    "Fing might be too big ta loot." notes Grakgut.
    "YOUZE DUNNO WHO YOUZE TALKIN ABOUT, BATTOL BRUTHA. I IZ KROZ RUBYKONZES, MAGOS ORDINATUS OF DA DEFFWOTCH. AND DAT FING IZ GUNNA FIT!" declares Kroz, ""IZ SWEARZ IT ON GORK, MORK AND DA EMPRUH DEMSELF!"
    "Loot it! Loot all da dakka!" yells Wazgor."Iz easy. But weeze gonna have ta loot more enjinz." says Kroz.
    >> Shas'o R'myr !!J5+vjygjQuK 12/16/11(Fri)22:12 No.17241195
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    The Kill Team's voxcaster lights up.
    "Deathwatch, we're going to establish a shorehold. " says Dynamite over the vox, "But something isn't sitting right with me about that Mechanicus ship."
    "ASSUME IZ HOSTILE. WAIT A BIT FER US 'FORE YA TRY TA TAKE IT OVER. COULD BE MO' TINBOYZ AGAIN." says Kroz.
    "It doesn't make sense there'd only be one." says Dynamite, "and I can GUARANTEE it's hostile. The last Forge destroyed our Recruiting worlds, and devastated the sector nearly fifty years ago."
    "No wonder youze wants dat fing so much. dat's ded'ard." says Kroz.
    "Dat fing shuldnt be dakka! Dakka goez 'DAKKADAKKADAKKA'!" says Grakgut, "Nekron gitz fings go 'ZIPZOPZOOPITYBOP'!"
    "It'z jus' a big zzapa! We jus' need mo' enjinz!" replies Wazgor.
    "Boss, we'ze pickin' up spiky gitz near dat otha krooza..." says Uzgob.
    "MO' SPIKY GITZ!" yells Grakgut, who pauses for a moment, "betta yet, kall kollect."
    "Make'em pay DERE teef fer da kall!" adds Wazgor.

    Turning their screen on, the Kill Team hears various chatter. "For Garo!" and other assorted battle cries litter the vox channels. The spiky gitz are heading inside the Mechanicus ship.

    "Plisken: I dun trust dem gits. dis time, I wonts youze ta head to dat reaktor, an make sure none of'em lekterz an spiky gitz or anyone else tryin ta blow up me new gunz does bad fings ta it. use all dem snipy fings ya need, but no 'splosives!" says Kroz.
    "Roight, boss!" says a nearby cardboard box.
    >> Shas'o R'myr !!J5+vjygjQuK 12/16/11(Fri)22:16 No.17241234
         File1324091782.jpg-(159 KB, 700x542, Ork stare.jpg)
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    "Bah!" sighs Grakgut, "Looks loike itz time ta krump an' krump!
    Grakgut continues.
    "An' krump an' krump an' krump an'..."
    "AN' MUCK ABOUT!" says a voice in the vents.
    "OI KNOE YER DERE, SKARFANG!" yells Grakgut, "GET OUT'ERE SOZ I KAN KRUMP YA!"
    The vents lay silent, so Grakgut kills the vent in rage.

    Hitting the Burnas, the Kill Team passes over the Mechanicus Vessel. Kroz holds position, then the kill team heads to the Last Danca. Heading into the Launch Bays, the Kill Team sees a collection of Black Panthers, each one with different guns, ranging from needle rifles to bolters to stubcannons. One lacks pants.

    "Wut 'appened ta yer pants?" asks Grakgut.
    "Forgot to grab them when getting off the Brown Thunder." says the mehreen.
    "Ah." says Grakgut as Chapter Master Johnson prepares to address his men.
    >> Shas'o R'myr !!J5+vjygjQuK 12/16/11(Fri)22:17 No.17241240
         File1324091827.jpg-(75 KB, 500x302, Tactical Squad.jpg)
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    "Men, we followed those dumb heretics out to the middle of nowhere to keep 'em from gettin' their filthy tentacles on Xaviol. But, we stumbled onto somethin' they're so hot for, that they're scramblin' over each other to get it." says Chapter Master Johnson, "Well, I don't care if it's the God Emperor's own anti-son-of-a-bitch machine, or a giant hula hoop, we're not gonna let 'em have it! What we will let 'em have is a belly full of bolt, and a pool of their own blood to drown in! Am I right, Marines?"
    "SIR, YES SIR!" says the Black Panthers, who begin rushing to their Thunderhawks and Stormravens.

    "WE'ZE KRUMP FEAR INTA DEM DA WAY DA FEAR GOT KRUMPED OUT OF US WHEN WE BECAME MEHREENS!" declares Wazgor.
    "OI. JOHNSON! DIS'ERE'S A MAGOS OF DA SHIPMAKIN VARIETY UNDER ALL DAT ARMER AN ME SNAZZY COAT. YOU KILL ALL DEM FINGS TRYIN TA TAKE DA EMPRUHZ NEWEST DEFFWOTCH RELIK GIGA-ZZAPPAS, AND WEEZE'LL MAKE SURE YOUZE GETS YERSELF A NEW SHIP!" says Kroz, "SO GET DAT DUTY DUN GUD OR WEEZE'LL SEZ IN US HISTOREEZ YOU WUZN'T PROPPA BOYZ AT ALL!"
    "We can talk business later!" says Chapter Master Johnson, hefting a Spanker-class Missile Launcher, "right now we're gonna kick some heretic ass!"
    >> Shas'o R'myr !!J5+vjygjQuK 12/16/11(Fri)22:20 No.17241264
         File1324092005.gif-(2.21 MB, 350x150, Beer300.gif)
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    It seems the heretics left a skeleton crew outside, no more than 30-40. The Black Panthers begin jumping out of their transports, and in a hot drop assault, separate and systemmatically exterminate the heretics.
    "Dear Chapter Master, kickin' ass in outer space, wish you were here!" says one Black Panther over the Vox.
    "I heard that...jackass." says Chapter Master Johnson as his Storm Raven lands.
    "Deze 'umies talk too much." sighs Grakgut as the LAst Danca's bulkheads slam open, "Toime fer krumpin'!"
    "WELL DONE, BATTOL BRUTHAS OF DA BLAK PANTHUZ! DIS DAY, DIS GIANT ZZAPPA IZ GUNNA BE DA EMPRUHZ! SKOOIRE BOLDO, GET READY TA SUCK DEM FACE!"
    Boldo chirps.

    "Uh, Deathwatch." says Grenadius, approaching the Last Danca, "We're going to hold the beach-head here. We don't have the manpower to search that Cruiser."
    "...ain't dat 'eresy?" asks Wazgor.
    "Naw, iz gud, " says Kroz, "We'ze 'appy ta stea...uh, fight da fights!"

    The fifty-odd Black Panthers begin establishing reloading points and chokepoints. That is, until Grakgut and Wazgor order some fungus beer sent down in a rokk pod. The Black Panthers all abandon their posts and head for the grog.
    "Oi dun alwayz drink, but wen oi wonts ta fink 'bout Gork an Mork fer inspuhrationz, Iz take zoggin Grakka-Deffwotch Funguz Grog-fingz. Goez down smooth." says Kroz.
    >> Shas'o R'myr !!J5+vjygjQuK 12/16/11(Fri)22:22 No.17241275
         File1324092136.jpg-(18 KB, 539x273, Ark.jpg)
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    From this altitude, the Mechanicus ship appears to have crashed purposefully into the Forge Reactor. There are numerous scrapes in the metal that would allow access deeper. Kroz passes a simple test to realize this ship is an Ark Mechanicus, incredibly rare ships are only granted to the higher-ups of the Mechanicus.

    Peering through one of the metal scrapes, the ship is incredibly dark. Only the barest of emergency lights illuminate the interior.
    "... dats no gud. not 'nuf powah." says Kroz.
    The closest metal scrape leads to a series of hallways that extend into the ship. The hallways are dark but miraculously, the doors still work.
    As Kroz and Grakgut walk, and Wazgor flies down low-power, they pass a bunch of wildlife that has established itself in the halls.
    "Why'z dere plantz growin' on da ship?" asks Wazgor.
    One specimen looks like a cross between a stegosaurus and a rhinoceros. Another looks like a camel crossed with a porcupine. Either way, the ship looks like it's been here for a while.
    "Letz ride deze fings!" says Grakgut.
    Grakgut walks up to the creature. He makes six degrees of failure on the wrangling test. The creature explodes.
    "Bah! NOT AGIN!"sighs Grakgut, "STOP 'SPLODIN!"
    The Rambisaurus stares at Grakgut blankly, then continues grazing. Near the Rambisaurs grazing, the Kill Team also notices something else - a blue light.
    "Derez da blue git! Leest 'e won't splode!" says Grakgut.
    "SEZ YOUZE. LEMME ASK'IM FER STUFF FIRST!" replies Kroz hastily.
    "Got a selection of good things on sale, stranger..." says the Merchant.
    >> Shas'o R'myr !!J5+vjygjQuK 12/16/11(Fri)22:23 No.17241286
         File1324092204.jpg-(41 KB, 400x300, Merchant stock.jpg)
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    Wazgor acquires a twin-linked Grenade Launcher. Grakgut puts storm fields on his fists. Kroz manages a twin-linked Xenarch Death Arc, which I grew to call the Light Lightning Cannon, or LLC. Wurrza attempts for an fails to get a best quality burna, and 'Eadmangla gets an embedded auspex. As a team they get a modified Saturnine drive, which grants numerous bonuses to their krooza.

    "Heh heh heh, thank you." says the Merchant as he walks around a corner.
    >> Shas'o R'myr !!J5+vjygjQuK 12/16/11(Fri)22:28 No.17241330
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    The hallway is dark without the blue light, though the Kill Team can vaguely see a wide hallway that appears to lead deeper in the ship. Before heading deeper into the ship, Grakgut tries one more time to get some of the local wildlife to follow him. He barely succeeds, though he is too large to ride them. He simply sends them back to the Last Danca.

    "We'ze kan use dis fer a new dracosquig!" says Grakgut.
    "But datz not a squig. Dat'z a...wot iz dat fing anyway?" posits Kroz.
    "Itz...dunno. But itz big, an' weze gunna make it orky!" Grakgut says as he kicks the Rambisaurus herd out the door.

    Heading deeper down, into the ship, the hallways begin to smooth out and become longer. The lights in these hallways are brighter. As the Kill Team heads down these hallways, the walls themselves start to flicker, and begin broadcasting images, and hidden speakers begin relaying sound.
    >> Shas'o R'myr !!J5+vjygjQuK 12/16/11(Fri)22:30 No.17241344
         File1324092628.jpg-(48 KB, 480x502, techpriest hood.jpg)
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    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bbbWUTTCpAs

    On the image is a techpriest, with glowing green eyes under a red hood.

    "Activate Log. Code 32B. Record." the Techpriest appears to say, "When this message is released, it will be the culmination of all my time and work."
    "Oy, Kroz, do mekz us'lly 'ave glowing eyez?" asks Wazgor.
    "Yooze sposed ta be wun uv deze gitz, roight? Ask 'im in masheen talk!" adds Grakgut.
    "When the people of the sector hear this message, they will recognize me, Magos Aleskander Farotek, as their savior." says the image.
    "Wotz dis git talkin' about? Mo' X-terminatin'?" asks Wazgor.
    "The Black Panthers, the Rogue Traders, the Tau, they will all fall to my perfect system." says the recording of Farotek.
    Wazgor axes one of the images, leaving dozens more down the hallway.
    "I have dispatched my fleet to Aeonic Forge Alpha." says Farotek, "I will send your fleet to investigate the so-called Delta Forge."
    Wazgor and Kroz begin searching for an interface cogitator.
    "I am granting this Ark one of my experiments, an unknown Xenoform I picked up on the world of Chernol, improved with sacred archeotech. It will assist in spreading my vision. I also grant this Ark a weapon of immeasurable power, sacred archeotech to enforce my designs." says Farotek, "I cannot fail. My word is law, and this sector will embrace it!"

    Kroz finds a terminal as the message begins to loop.
    "Whyz all deze gitz be tryin' ta 'make da yooniverse perfekt'?" asks Grakgut, "Dis place iz already roight proppa! Lotsa foightin', lotsa winnin', lotsa gitz gettin' zogged!"
    Kroz jacks in.
    "Oi kan't fink uv a bettah place..." muses Grakgut.
    Kroz brings up a timeline - the looped message is nearly fifty years old.
    "so dis'ere ship crashed'ere maybe uh... ow many trips is dat... LOTS ago, wotever yearz iz." says Kroz.
    >> Shas'o R'myr !!J5+vjygjQuK 12/16/11(Fri)22:33 No.17241371
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    With 6 degrees of success on Tech Use, Kroz also brings up a hololithic map of the Ark, and notes that there's been non-imperial access to multiple ship areas. He also accesses security, opening all doors and viewing cameras to multiple areas of the ship. The Crew Quarters camera is overgrown, showing nothing but a herd of Rambisaurs. The bridge is silent, nothing but dust and echoes.

    "Zog dat, check da armory!" says Wazgor.

    The Armory camera is focused on a line of cardboard boxes moving forward, which suddenly stop.
    "Oy, wotz Pliskin doin' dere?" asks Kroz.
    "Uh, boss?" says Pliskin, "Dere'z sumfin' 'ere..."
    "Gud job, Pliskin!" says Wazgor.
    "Wot ya find?" asks Grakgut.
    The camera pans to reveal a huge gun.
    "Zog me..." says Wazgor.
    "...an' Oi wuz jus' about ta say you'ze muckin' about..." says Kroz.
    "Uh, it says, "'Eavy Qua...Kwantu...It'z a zoggin' 'uge kannon," says Pliskin, "We'ze bringin' it to da krooza."
    "Welp. bettah git krumpin'." says Grakgut.
    >> Shas'o R'myr !!J5+vjygjQuK 12/16/11(Fri)22:35 No.17241387
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    The Armory camera switches to show followers of Garo appear to be at the reactor, setting charges.
    "Dis is bad. REAL BAD." yells Kroz, "KROZ TA DYNOMITE. IF YOUZE GOTS ANY TELLYPORTAZ, WE NEEDZ A KILL TEAM IN DA REAKTER NOW. SENDIN KOORDINITES, OR WEEZE GUNNA HAVE BIGGA PROBLEMS DEN JUST LOZIN DIS SEKTA!"
    "We'll try to get you some support, Deathwatch," says Brother Captain Dynamite, but our Teleporter was on Brown Thunder and we only have our Thunderhawks at the moment.
    "WHY KULDN'T YA TELLYPORT DA TELLYPORTA OFF WIT' DA TELLYPORTA 'FORE DA BROWN THUNDER GOT ZOGGED TA CHOCOLATE RAIN?"
    Wazgor activates his jetpack and rokkits towards the Enginarium, with Kroz and Grakgut following.

    Rushing toward the reactor, the Kill Team hears a horrific screech, followed by screaming, some small arms fire, and what appears to be small explosions. They appear to be krak and frag explosions. Approaching the door of the reactor, it opens to reveal a number of scorched bodies. The place appears to be deathly silent.

    Silent, until a metallic screech pierces the air again, and something flies out of a gash in the Enginarium walls.

    A massive reptilian creature, or rather what was once one, now covered in the sheen of living metal, with wings consisting of long thin spikes and plasma membranes, and a long spiked tail, flies in.

    The Omega Xenoform opens its jaws, and lays a stream of fire out. Kroz and Grakgut notice the living metal covering extends across the glowing plasma wings and the thing's arms and legs, but the chest armor is noticeably damaged, revealing rotting biological components.

    At this moment, 'Eadmangla and Wurrza finally arrive.
    >> Shas'o R'myr !!J5+vjygjQuK 12/16/11(Fri)22:37 No.17241403
         File1324093033.png-(126 KB, 562x467, Farotek has no originality.png)
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    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S9xq-vK7tNc

    The living metal covering the Omega Xenoform is impervious to ALL damage. However, extensive damage due to age and battle has revealed the chest component, the closest thing that could be called a weakness. Naturally, the kill team goes full auto, reasoning that SOME of the shots will hit the body. The Omega Xenoform opens up with its Kinetic Breath Weapon and Multi-Missile System, as it flies around. As the Kill Team bring out their heaviest weapons, the Omega Xenoform sprays the area with its Ultrathermal Flamestrike Projector, and then rushing in with its scything tail, doing decent damage all around. It drops some Meson Bombs and more missiles before landing on the reactor itself. Between Wurrza's doombolts, 'Eadmangla's pulse fire, and Wazgor's grenades, the kill team is doing as much damage to it as it is to them. However, it is Kroz finally landing a hit with his new Xenarch Death Arc, dealing over 75 damage and striking the final blow to the Omega Xenoform.

    And what a blow. The electrical surge causes the Omega xenoform to release a horrible metallic scraping noise as it explodes, missiles and ammo stores going critical, destroying part of the reactors as well and sending them into overload. The reactor now is beginning to rumble the entire Ark.

    "Hey, Deathwatch, I don't know what you did out there, but stuff is waking up out here!" says Grenadius over the vox.
    >> Shas'o R'myr !!J5+vjygjQuK 12/16/11(Fri)22:38 No.17241418
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    The Reactor now catches on fire, the control protocols now completely overloaded. Grakgut drags Kroz off, who is still struggling to grab as many living metal bitz as he can, and Wazgor, Wurrza, and 'Eadmangla begin running off.

    After about 5 minutes straight of running, the Kill Team makes it out of the ship, which is starting to disintegrate itself. They see the Black Panthers facing off against waves of Necron Warriors. As the bridge of the Ark Mechanicus explodes in the distance, the Black Panthers begin retreating to their thunderhawks. The Kill Team makes it to the Last Danca, and hit the burnaz, putting numerous Necrons in the dust.

    "All right! Let's get Tactical, Marines!" yells Chapter Master Johnson as he leads the retreat.

    "Dat'z jus' not fair..." says Kroz, upset over losing a majority of the loot.

    As the thunderhawks take off, da Last Danca makes it off world as well.
    "Dun worry, boss! We'ze got da big kannon on da ship 'ere!" says Pliskin over the vox.
    "Oy, Pliskin, you loot some tinboyz as well?" asks Kroz.
    "Sorry boss, wuz busy wif da kannon!" says Pliskin.
    >> Shas'o R'myr !!J5+vjygjQuK 12/16/11(Fri)22:39 No.17241423
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    The Last Danca reaches the launch bay, followed by the Thunderhawks and the Storm Ravens. As the Last Danca's bulkheads fall open, Pliskin is there waiting.

    "BOSS!" Pliskin yells, "Uzgob's on da bridge! 'E says itz important!"

    Grakgut immediately runs up to the bridge, followed by the rest of the Kill Team, Dynamite, Grenadius, and Johnson.
    "Boss!" yells Uzgob, "Rememba when oi said da Krooza was lookin' fer sumfin?"
    "Yah?" says Kroz.
    "It'z dat kannon!" yells Uzgob excitedly.
    "Oi dun' follow..." says Grakgut.
    "So da Kannon goes on da Krooza!" says Wazgor.
    "But 'ow ya know?" asks Kroz.
    "I dunno 'ow I know but I know!" says Uzgob, "Kan't ya feel da difference?"

    As Uzgob finishes, the Aeonic Forge begins to glow.
    >> Shas'o R'myr !!J5+vjygjQuK 12/16/11(Fri)22:40 No.17241432
         File1324093235.jpg-(87 KB, 700x367, Necron Starship.jpg)
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    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=btXnl7AGFg0

    Within the central ring, a portal begins to open. But this isn't a warp portal. The Aeonic Forge is acting as an incredibly large Dolmen Gate. Out of the portal floats a Cairn-class Tombship, followed by a few Scythes, Jackals, and Dirges.

    As everyone heads to battle stations, Uzgob turns to the kill team.
    "Oi...dun fink we need ta worry, boss!" says Uzgob, "Oi fink we'ze gunna be okay!"

    On the bridge, suddenly the controls sink into the ground. Out of the floor emerges new controls. Every terminal on the bridge starts glowing green. The Looted Krooza begins shuddering.
    "Wut da zog iz goin' on?!" exclaims Grakgut.
    Kroz checks the Krooza systems, and notes no outside interference - it's all Krooza.
    "Oi knew it!" yells Uzgob excitedly, "KROZA WUZ WAITIN' FER DAT KANNON!"
    "Wot's Krooza doin'?" asks Wazgor.
    "Let'z go den!" exclaims Grakgut.
    "Awroight boss, da biggest fight iz yers ta take!" says Uzgob, "SHOW'EM WHY WE"Z A BATTLE BAHGE!"
    >> Shas'o R'myr !!J5+vjygjQuK 12/16/11(Fri)22:43 No.17241458
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    Krooza begins accelerating towards the Necrons. Beneath Kroz appears a new control face. Kroz grabs the new controls and spins da Looted Krooza prow-first towards the tomb-ship. The terminals all appear to go crazy.
    "FRACTAL MODULE SYSTEM ENGAGED!" says one, as doors across da Looted Krooza begin sealing.
    "PLASMA DRIVE OUTPUT INCREASING!" says another, as hololithic displays show incredible energy surges.

    As da Looted Krooza rushes toward the Necron ships, something strange is happening. The Kill Team feels the command bridge moving forward, along the center of the hull. Krooza splits down the center, all guns firing. As the Bridge reorients itself forward, what was once the prow now appeears to be giant Klaws, and the engine section attached to legs. Krooza draws the massive Kannon, taking aim at the approaching Necrons.

    Supa Dimenshun Stompa mode engaged.
    >> Shas'o R'myr !!J5+vjygjQuK 12/16/11(Fri)22:45 No.17241467
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    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1VSA7CvnBAU

    "WOTS YA FINK, BLACK PANTHAZ? LOIKES DA EMPRUHZ GORKYMORKY ARKEOTEK?" yells Kroz as he drives Krooza forward.
    "It certainly is impressive." says Brother Captain Dynamite.
    "Iz dunno wotz goin' on, BUT WE'ZE GONNA LIGHT UP DERE NIGHT!" yells 'Eadmangla.

    On the screen, the 'Eavy Kwantum Reakshun Kannon begins charging. Kroz charges Krooza forward, into the swarm of Necron raiders. Grakgut bisects a Jackal with a single punch of Krooza's klaws. While Wazgor unloads into a Dirge with the Kannons. Wurrza finishes it off with the Wizard's Tower. Kroz unloads the Torpedoes and 'Eadmangla uses the Lances to finish off the final Jackal.

    "WEZE DA DEFFWOTCH AN' DIS IZ DA KROOZA. WEZE IZ DA KLAW DAT KRUMPS GITZ!" yells Grakgut.

    I should also add that in Supa Dimenshun Stompa mode, Righteous fury is enabled. I never saw so many 10s.
    >> Shas'o R'myr !!J5+vjygjQuK 12/16/11(Fri)22:47 No.17241477
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    The two Scythes move up, and begin firing. A lucky hit strips Krooza of its Auspexes, prompting Kroz do do a spacewalk to fix it. The Kill Team does their best to hold off the two Scythes, until Kroz fixes the problem two turns in. A devastating volley disables a Lance, and sets their manufactorum on fire, though the krew manages to put it out. After concentrated Kannon, Torpedo, and Tower fire force one Scythe to Phase-out, the Kill Team begins heading toward the Cairn. Krooza turns itself around, and begins firing at the last Scythe while moving backwards. A lucky crit from Krooza disables their Lightning Arcs for a bit, while Grakgut punches the second Scythe in half.

    "OUR KLAW IS THE KLAW THAT WILL KRUMP DEM GITZ!" yells Wazgor as Krooza punches the phasing remnants of the Scythe out of the way.

    At this point the Kill Team notices something.

    KANNON CHARGE: 100%
    >> Shas'o R'myr !!J5+vjygjQuK 12/16/11(Fri)22:50 No.17241495
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    Krooza aims the Kannon directly at the Cairn, new Dirges, Jackals, and Scythes appearing out of the dolmen gate. The Kannon splits down the middle, glowing, focusing klaws beginning to spin and coalesce a lance of barely contained energy. 'Eadmangla takes the controls, having the highest BS in the party, and fires the 'Eavy Kwantum Reakshun Kannon. The focusin' klaws spin incredibly fast, and open at a slight angle, firing a wave of green energy straight at the tombships.

    "EAT WAAAGH, TINBOYZ!" yells Kroz.

    The kannon's lance of focused WAAAGH pierces through the Dirges, through the Jackals, through the Scythes, through the Tombship itself. As the Cairn explodes and phases out, the Dolmen Gate destablilizes. The Aeonic Forge explodes as the reactor on the Ark Mechanicus finally goes critical.

    Uzgob's mouth falls open. The cigar falls out of Chapter Master Johnson's mouth. 'Eadmangla drops his mug. Grakgut can't stop laughing.
    "...well I'll be." says Grenadius.

    However, various power surges rushed through Krooza.
    "Uh, boss?" says Uzgob, "We'ze stuck."
    "Wuddaya mean weze stuck?!" yells Grakgut.
    "Dat kannon fried da enjinz!" says Uzgob, "Ya need ta repair'em!"
    "Get your engines to a usable state, Deathwatch." says Chapter Master Johnson, I'll show you a good place to get repaired."
    >> Shas'o R'myr !!J5+vjygjQuK 12/16/11(Fri)22:50 No.17241500
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    Grakgut tries to fix the engines, but only succeeds in hurting himself as a piece of the engine falls off and hits his head. Kroz tries to fix the engines, though for the first day it proves particularly troublesome.

    "Too bad, If Jamal was here he would have helped you fix it." says Grenadius.
    "Wot 'appened ta Jamal?" asks Kroz.
    "We stuck him with that Tau!" says Chapter Master Johnson. "He's a funny case. We trained him wrong. As a joke!"
    "Loike an Ork?" asks Wazgor.
    "WOT?" exclaims Kroz, "Dat wuld be trainin' roight!"

    Kroz finally fixes the enjinz, and Krooza shudders as it converts back to ship mode.
    >> Shas'o R'myr !!J5+vjygjQuK 12/16/11(Fri)22:51 No.17241512
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    "All right, " says Johnson, "You should set coordinates for this world...Iniega. They can fix you up but good there. I'll tell ya more when we get there!"
    "Gud 'nuff for me." says Grakgut, "Oy, 'ow ya loike da grog?"
    "Best stuff I ever had!" says Chapter Master Johnson.
    "Gud, Gud. Dat stuff gives ya WAAAGH!"
    Grakgut summons his grot manservant Grakkagrak to bring out more fungus beer for the mother of all parties. Kroz heads back to the bridge. plugs in, punches in the coordinates, and lounges back in the sarcophagus before kicking the go 'button into gear.

    "Dey'z gotta be Orkz...da lot of'em!" sighs Kroz as Da Looted Krooza enters the Warp.

    We called the session here.
    >> Servant Of The Emperor 12/16/11(Fri)22:54 No.17241532
    I...
    Saw the Krooza, in it's glorious form, in my mind...
    So, ded, killy.
    >> Anonymous 12/16/11(Fri)22:54 No.17241535
    >>17241458
    >Supa Dimenshun Stompa mode engaged.
    Mother of god, how had you ruled that thing?
    >> 13 - Memory of Farotek. Shas'o R'myr !!J5+vjygjQuK 12/16/11(Fri)22:55 No.17241545
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    This session was longer than most, I was lucky to have started early.

    In addition to 1000 XP, 5 PF, 1 Fate Point, and the unlocking of Supa Dimenshun Stompa Mode, my players also unlocked Skwad Mode. This will give them special abilities based on which Skwad Mode they activate. The first one, WAAAGH, grants an extra single attack after a full action, even if that action was another attack. They will unlock more over the game.

    Overall, a successful session, and I look forward to more Supa Dimenshun Stompa fights.

    Otherwise, that is all I can say about Episode 13: Memory of Farotek.
    >> Shas'o R'myr !!J5+vjygjQuK 12/16/11(Fri)23:02 No.17241619
    >>17241535

    I ruled SDS Mode would be essentially the same as space combat. Klaw attacks would be regular melee attacks (can charge, etc) that require Weapon Skill to hit. Damage would be as a ram attack. Weapon positioning became irrelevant as Krooza could face any direction it wanted. Its speed was the same as its normal speed (at this moment is 9 AUs). Void shields are unchanged. I look forward to seeing what fun I can do with it.
    >> Anonymous 12/16/11(Fri)23:04 No.17241634
    ORKROSS KANNON!
    >> Shas'o R'myr !!J5+vjygjQuK 12/16/11(Fri)23:06 No.17241650
    >>17241634

    Useful. I think I'll use that.
    >> Anonymous 12/16/11(Fri)23:09 No.17241663
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    PIERCE DA 'EAVENS WITH YER WAAAAAGH!
    >> Anonymous 12/16/11(Fri)23:12 No.17241682
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    >Your GM will never let you have a super robot
    >> Anonymous 12/16/11(Fri)23:19 No.17241717
    >>17241682
    Unless you are in Shas's group.

    Which I'm not, so I'll feel bad now.
    >> Anonymous 12/16/11(Fri)23:22 No.17241728
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    jesus fuck, i love these deffwotch updates
    >> Anonymous 12/16/11(Fri)23:23 No.17241731
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    >>17241682
    I don'yt know what you're talking about, our Sidereal crafter just built two Noble Warstriders. One in Orichalcum for our Dawn, one in Starmetal with Orichalcum Facade for himself. And plans to build a couple more once he has enough Moonsilver and Soulsteel for mine and the abyssal's.
    >> Anonymous 12/16/11(Fri)23:24 No.17241739
    >>17241731

    Yeah, but are they piloted by a sadistic team of loot-happy orks who are just out for a good time?
    >> Anonymous 12/17/11(Sat)00:00 No.17242090
    >>17241728

    It's like watching a show that's an hour of explosions.
    >> Anonymous 12/17/11(Sat)00:01 No.17242104
    >>17241739
    Sadly, no. An 8-foot tall hairless former pitfighter who started dancing in his new mech when he got it, though.
    >> Anonymous 12/17/11(Sat)00:24 No.17242312
    >Farotek

    ...wasn't he the BBEG of the last game?
    >> Shas'o R'myr !!J5+vjygjQuK 12/17/11(Sat)00:34 No.17242421
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    >>17242312

    ...maybe
    >> Anonymous 12/17/11(Sat)00:52 No.17242613
    >>17242421
    Oh yeah, I finally remember now! Do you still have that download for the compiled stories from your Pimps in Space game?
    >> Shas'o R'myr !!J5+vjygjQuK 12/17/11(Sat)00:58 No.17242656
         File1324101509.jpg-(43 KB, 468x527, Despite the fact that this gen(...).jpg)
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    >>17242613

    Farotek is dead. Gone.

    You should be able to find out more by finding Pimps In Space: Collected Visions on /rs/.
    >> Anonymous 12/17/11(Sat)01:02 No.17242692
    Someone on the FFG forums was trying to start up an all-ork game. I doubt it would end up like this craziness.
    >> Shas'o R'myr !!J5+vjygjQuK 12/17/11(Sat)01:07 No.17242750
    >>17242692

    Those guys are weird. Too serious, and very stuck up. Not to mention that their ideas of balance are very strange.

    I think sharing these stories on the FFG forums would cause a few paradigms to shift without a clutch.

    That said, I'd pay to see it.
    >> Anonymous 12/17/11(Sat)02:00 No.17243203
    evening bump
    >> Kroz 12/17/11(Sat)02:46 No.17243488
    Orkross Kannon...
    Yeah, that sounds just about right.

    I was manning the Kannonz though, not the torps, this fight. Kroz is still quite sore about the planet-cracker though. Its the mekboy equivalent of sad drunken "the one that got away" stories.

    If anyone's wondering about grog and marines: Marines have the same toughness and near-immunity to drugs, toxins and other things as orks, more or less. In addition, these guys are pretty obviously Malleus Radicals to me (and pretty obviously "mostly orks except that one guy who took his helmet off" to kroz). Hypocrisy runs rampant in the imperium: daemonhosts and xenoweapons to deal with xenos and the immaterium isn't all that uncommon. But I digress. If you're wondering at what we're hoping to achieve...

    Grakka-Deffwotch Grog Funguz iz da only grog-funguz APPROVED by da cod deck'o startsez. An wen youze pop da top, da safetiez dropz.

    Grakka-Deffwotch Grog Funguz, Gives you... WAAAGH!
    >> Anonymous 12/17/11(Sat)02:52 No.17243524
    >Grakka-Deffwotch Grog Funguz, Gives you... WAAAGH!

    that seems really really wrong in a really horrific way
    >> Anonymous 12/17/11(Sat)03:09 No.17243595
    latenight bump
    >> Anonymous 12/17/11(Sat)04:59 No.17244168
    the way it reads it looks like some chunks of conversation are missing?
    >> Anonymous 12/17/11(Sat)11:09 No.17245738
    >>17244168

    He said that some players were late, so it seems like half the team isn't talking.
    >> Shas'o R'myr !!J5+vjygjQuK 12/17/11(Sat)14:12 No.17247127
    >>17244168

    Is there a problem? Some of this was written while half asleep on the plane ride home. If I missed something, I can attempt to fix it.



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