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    67 KB Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)18:20 No.15581459  
    Female players.

    Share your horror stories!

    There is this hambeast that's a part of my D&D group. She throws a tantrum if we don't do what she wants to do, and she ALWAYS rolls thin elven characters.

    She got pissed off last game because my human warrior wouldn't give in to her elven ranger's advances. She always likes to RP that her characters are irresistible and she thinks I was cheating by not having my warrior fall in love with her retarded elf.

    I've talked to a few other members of the group about kicking her out, but they don't want to get rid of the only female member. FML. I'll take a dumb, party girl over one of these tabletop whales any day.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)18:23 No.15581496
    Haha, oh man, let's hope the DM isn't an ass and doesn't toss in an item that seduces people one of these days.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)18:27 No.15581556

    The DM is fortunately kind enough to tell her to knock off her shit, but then she always gets extremely pouty for the rest of the game.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)18:29 No.15581581
    Let her pout.

    Be more of a man than your comrades, and confront her. DnD is not made to create schlick material, but adventures.

    Then, introduce her to FATAL
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)18:31 No.15581601

    I have confronted her about it before but she just starts whining (and even crying once) until everyone else tells me to lay off her.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)18:32 No.15581613
    as I said, introduce her to actual erotic games, it might turn out well.

    or break her.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)18:33 No.15581622
    Just simply ask her why she thinks she deserves to make every single session into her personal fapfic. She wont have an answer that wont make her sound stupid.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)18:33 No.15581625

    I ain't playing any erotic games with this hambeast.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)18:34 No.15581639
    My first response was that you should gang rape the player, but you'd get in trouble.

    So get your friends in on it and gang bang her character. Mentally rape her. Make sure you record shit though. She can't claim sexual assault if you're roleplaying. 1st Amendment ftw
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)18:34 No.15581640

    I have pointed that out to her before, and she responded with, "I am just trying to roleplay! Why are you so against story in our games, Anon?!"

    Anyway, does anyone else have any tales to share? I can't be the only person with a female in his group.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)18:34 No.15581642
    Who said to play a game with her? Just the erotic is fine, then she'll do whatever you want ever.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)18:35 No.15581650
    If she's bothering you in general, consider making a warforged. Warforged have no sex drive.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)18:36 No.15581658
    I always play elves.

    Bitches love elves.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)18:36 No.15581661
    If she makes female characters consistently, roll a (quietly) homosexual character in your next game.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)18:36 No.15581664
    you're the most interesting case.

    have you told her that these aren't "stories", but fetish fuel to make up for her lack of sexual life, and that it was disturbing? I mean, you're playing rpgs to make u for the lack of action in your life, but that simply isn't half as creepy.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)18:36 No.15581665
    >>I want to be a bard even though the group has no healing at all
    >>I want to be a gay male bard!
    >>Every time my turn comes up I'm going to spend 3 minutes deciding what to do and it's always useless shit like making a loud noise to deafen the BBEG
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)18:37 No.15581675
    >mentally rape her
    Why give the bitch what she wants? All women secretly want to be raped.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)18:37 No.15581678
    >crippling one of your greatest enemy's senses

    Every little bit helps, you know.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)18:38 No.15581687

    I had one player who toke anything said to her in game (and she played an infernal witch type) personally. So when another character playing a Witch Hunter flat didn't like her but was restrained due to group politics he would insult her in character and she would subsequently hate IRL like she's was the witch. She even called him an intolerant asshole. I don't think it was a girl thing though.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)18:38 No.15581688
    Point out how geekey guys get a bad rap for doing stupid things when girl gamers show up, for example bringing up rape. Point out that she is doing it and it is just a disgusting when a girl does it and ask how she would feel if the situation was reversed.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)18:38 No.15581689
    If you're telling everyone how is it a secret?
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)18:39 No.15581691

    >she just starts whining (and even crying once) until everyone else tells me to lay off her.
    >everyone else

    Catch her alone and talk to her about it. Keep your tone carefully neutral, do not get angry or forceful, do not allow yourself to be provoked by anything she says or does.

    Above all, believe to your core that you don't want to cause trouble with her. I don't care if you have to learn method acting to get it perfect, just do it. Nothing beats an accusation of being picked on except true surprise about such an accusation. Do not plan around the eventuality that she'll rat you out because then you'll start thinking of excuses and reasons and defenses.

    True innocence is often defenseless because it can't imagine being accused of any wrongdoing.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)18:40 No.15581703
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    > "I am just trying to roleplay! Why are you so against story in our games, Anon?!"

    Kindly reply "That's nice, but focus on roleplaying YOUR character. My warrior is not interested in your elf, for roleplay reasons - he likes the cock. That's right, he gargles ball sack and loves it. So, stop coming onto me, or I'm going to have the party mage polymorph you into a man, at which point I will Tear. That. Ass. Up. Seriously, I will spend the next three sessions forcing you to roleplay being violently fucked in the ass, all session, every session.... Do we understand each other?"
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)18:40 No.15581706
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)18:41 No.15581708
    I play with girls. All of them are awesome except one, but she's the DM's daughter and is in high school. Likes to play LOLRANDUMB characters and dies a lot. But because the DM is her dad he can call her out on her bullshit.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)18:41 No.15581709
    Some ca/tg/irls I've known

    1) All her characters were vehicles for rape fantasies. Claimed to be a lesbian.
    2) Claimed to have PTSD from being raped by her Ex. Would pretend to have flashbacks to guilt and manipulate people.
    3) Petite wiccan girl. Brought pies to games... and wrote torture stories where guys got their dicks skinned and shit like that. I miss her.
    4) Female internet tough guy/know-it-all. Consntantly threatend to beat up people online. Constantly nitpicked stupid like armor in games' artwork.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)18:41 No.15581717
    Bards can do healing competently, and deafening a foe puts (or at least should, you have no iea how essential hearing is to our actions) negatives on his actions.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)18:42 No.15581719
    just make all your characters chaste, or say in their back story that they've been in a terrible accident. let's see her try and seduce you when you're missing certain parts of your anatomy.

    if players/the DM catch onto what you're doing and ask why then just tell them that you have no interest in EroRP.

    of course you don't need to announce these things, just make sure they're hidden somewhere on your character sheet so you can bring them up if you need to.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)18:42 No.15581720
    ... That's beautiful.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)18:43 No.15581729
    ...The women in our group have never been a big issue. One is too quiet for her own good, but has admitted she almost more likes to watch then play. Another is bad with systems - often to her own disadvantage - and while she plans out interesting characters, is never sure how to implement some of her ideas and quirks. The other is mostly there to hang out - the game is secondary, which drives me up the wall some times, but she has gotten better. Used to spend a ton of time on her laptop.

    No big problems here, bro.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)18:44 No.15581737
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    Play a Warforged

    Play a Warfoged Bard.

    With an electric guitar, that is a guitar that fires electric. And has a bayonet attachment.

    And decorates itself with the bleached bones of the slain, and tells the story of the Warforged who tunneled to Hell to rescue his friends from Death.

    Fuck this, If you don't play this character then I will.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)18:44 No.15581738

    This girl actually has a pretty busy sexual life. She gets pumped and dumped on a consistent basis. I think her longest relationship was two months.


    I'm not really interested in spending any time alone with this girl.


    Unfortunately, I think she'd be into that just for the attention. :\
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)18:45 No.15581745
    I doubt that'll fly in most courts, the defense would look through books just to see what he can offer the other side as a plea agreement.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)18:46 No.15581749
    Deafening I think puts a penalty on most actions, but is super useful against a spellcasting BBEG due to it causing a 20% spell failure on all spells with verbal components. Which is nearly every spell.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)18:46 No.15581755
    > Unfortunately, I think she'd be into that just for the attention. :\

    That's actually perfect.

    See, this plan is two-fold.
    If she is horrified by the idea, she'll leave you alone.
    If she is turned on by the idea, then DO IT, and let your party see just how twisted this chick really is.

    If your group can honestly sit there, watching her ENJOY that event, and they don't her to leave the group, then you need to find a new group.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)18:47 No.15581757
    My group, when all of us are together, is 3 males and 3 females. No horror stories because we're awesome like that.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)18:49 No.15581776
    Well, I have played with....... 3-4 girls.
    1. Girl that was terrible at rp, generally just horribly messed up in general. Obese white girl that could act sweet for a few minutes than turn uberbitch. Of course played EVERYBODY LOVES ME characters. Gave good head tho.
    >no, I'm not proud of this... -_-
    2. Overweight hispanic LARP girl. Played sue-ish characters all the time that were as broken as she could get away with (she played a psion wrong and misused disintegrate). Did I mention she cheats at dice rolls, bitches when she doesn't get her way, whines when consequences for poor choices come to her, did I mention she cheats? Finally drove her out with Dark Heresy and a lovely tool called the Dice Boot. As a last mention, one of our DMs crushed on her hard, so it exasperated a already bad situation.
    3. The DM's girlfriend. I thought you were exaggerating /tg/. I did. You were right, almost across the board. I quit that game a few weeks ago, and I'm happier for it.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)18:50 No.15581786
    Play a Half-Orc Barbarian/Warrior/fighter of some kind. Emphasize his respect in people with strength over 'looks'. He likes muscle-girls, not dainty waifs. If she complains, ask 'what's your strength? Not 20? Move along... I don't enjoy ripping girls in half like phone-books'.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)18:53 No.15581820
    >I'll take a dumb, party girl over one of these tabletop whales any day.

    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)18:54 No.15581825

    >I'm not really interested in spending any time alone with this girl.

    Been there, suffered through that. People are, on the whole, a lot less intolerable than you think they are in your heart of hearts.

    I had a similar chick in one of my gaming groups. Obsessed with anime, kind of difficult to deal with due to the way she tended to abuse her relationship with her spouse, a little too large to simply be "hefty." Then the pair of them ran into huge financial problems and the spouse joined the army to make ends meet. She turned out to be afraid of being in a house alone, so I went to visit her a few times when I had time off from work.

    After a few initial misunderstandings, she settled for talking. At length. For hours.

    It'll suck at first, because you don't want to be there. Eventually, you'll get over it and have something that's worth having after all of the trouble. I'd say "friendship," but it sounds stupid as fuck and "an understanding" would probably be a better way to describe it.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)18:54 No.15581831
    Or they can be disturbed and kick OP out.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)18:54 No.15581839
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    Or better yet, just play 'The Ultimate Warrior'. She'll be too busy worrying you're going to rip her character's head off to try making advances on you.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)18:55 No.15581849
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    This a million times.

    Orc look for survival traits, to them that is beauty.

    Also orcs tend to be massively unattractive and so will not pander to her imagination.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)18:58 No.15581884


    Usually female players are really obese, and obese people have bad personalities. It's great that they have the same hobby as me, but being fat and a terrible person is just unattractive.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)18:59 No.15581907

    Giant orc cock will be enough to grab her attention, I'd wager.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)19:00 No.15581911

    Plus they're fun as hell to roleplay. I personally take a 40k-Ork kind of personality and merge it with Jane from Firefly. The result is a belligerent melee powerhouse who measures the world in how much he gets paid and how much he hates everything... until he's in combat. Then he's jovial and happy.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)19:00 No.15581923
    Great... you can still shut her down with a simple 'he's an orc. He looks for strength and survival traits. Not dainty-waif elf waifus'.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)19:01 No.15581929
    There are two actually attractive girls in my current group who joined because they thought it would be fun. I started them off with AD&D and they quickly learned how things work, and they turned out to be very good at playing the roles they chose (one was a magic user, the other was a thief). They both have a strong awareness of their characters' capabilities as well as their limitations, and react to the situations I (the DM) give them accordingly. Out of character they are a lot of fun, and though they don't always get all the memes myself and my fa/tg/uy friend throw out they are always enthusiastic and bring a sense of community to the table that I really appreciate. They're very good at thinking outside the box and coming up with interesting ideas for the game.

    Now we're moving onto Earthdawn, and our first session of that will be tomorrow night. The girls have decided to keep their classes (taking on the Earthdawn adept equivalents of Wizard and Thief), mixing in some Beastmaster talents because they loved having the giant bird they got from Quall's Feather Tokens so much. I look forward to seeing how they handle a game that doesn't rely so heavily on formula, and gives them more space to roleplay.

    There's my horror story.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)19:01 No.15581931
    Half of my gaming group in high school were girls. One of them was my first girl friend, but we'd broken up before we started playing D&D together. The other had a crush on me. They played various genders and races, once even saying their two characters were lovers. It never came up in game it was just a sort of "We're saying they are" and they shared inn rooms. Beyond that, nothing came up. They mostly played 2nd edition fighters or rangers, but hell so did most of my high school group. No one wanted the complications of learning the magic system. So it was always fighters, rangers who didn't use their magic and rogues...

    In my more recent years, a girl I was dating played with us and the very small, young female friend of mine. In one of the games we ran, they both played men. My (now) ex-girl friend was playing a very political young man who wanted to try to subtly manipulate everyone and everything around him. The tiny girl played as a 6'4" drug addicted engineering genius who more or less just wanted to get high and build shit.

    It was a great game of evil-leaning d20 Apocalypse.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)19:02 No.15581938
    >obese people have bad personalities

    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)19:02 No.15581941

    I'd kill myself.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)19:05 No.15581977
    OP: Make your character happily married and/or simply not have a thing for elves. "The problem with elves is they ain't got no meat on their bones." Or you could also, in character, call her a whore that should go work in a brothel if she wants to have sex all the time that way she doesn't have to worry about getting cut up and scarred to the point where no one will want her except maybe for dirty old men who can't afford the brothels.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)19:07 No.15581995

    Bro, we live in a society where burglars brake into houses, sue the owners, and WIN.
    One good attorney would turn something like that into sexual harassment.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)19:07 No.15581996
    play a dwarf, make racial comments at her if she tries to hit on you, then proclaim that dwarf women are the best women in the world, and that it's probably the beards that make them that way.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)19:09 No.15582023
    I don't really have any horror stories of the female players I game with really my terrible group is the one that is all male.
    But that might just be syndrome from years of playing with them and a few members refusal to play anything resembling a party member.
    Might need to call up my chickas and get another WoD game going.
    >> Bowyeria 07/14/11(Thu)19:11 No.15582049
    Good idea.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)19:13 No.15582066
    The worst I've had is a female player who is obsessive about good group dynamics. She's a strong enough roleplayer, but will immediately break character if a fight looms, in-character or out. Makes some of my Dark Heresy campaigns difficult to pull off with much in the way of tension.

    Still, sounds like my worst is also my best.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)19:13 No.15582074
    I call it the blubber rule.
    If someone is fat but doesn't look like a saggy lump of shit they are just fat.
    If they do look like a saggy lump of shit they normally have terrible personalities because that is them being unhealthy not being plus sized.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)19:14 No.15582081
    >Zombie survival game
    >GF plays a small but mean former Chinese mafia enforcer
    >She has no tabletop RP experience whatsoever
    >Party formulates a plan to steal an ambulance
    >Calm gentleman type drives ambulance into crowd of paralyzed people
    >GF's character tells geezer to not go investigate
    >Geezer says it's okay if her character locks the door behind him
    >Geezer tries to get out of the ambulance
    >GF says her character is going to try and rear naked choke the guy
    >WTF moment, contested rolls - both fail horribly
    >Awkward situation, both back where they were
    >Geezer repeats the part about it being fine if they lock the door behind him
    >Tries to get out of the car
    >GF's character tries to sting him with a sedative syringe he yoinked from the ambulance
    >Party groans, GM groans, GM asks why would she do that
    >Sudden detailed description of how her character is paranoid and how about fifteen small details about how the geezer's player described the geezer have made her character jumpy.
    >Geezer's player shakes head, laughs a bit
    >GF's character manages to inject the geezer with sedatives, gf searches passed out geezer for guns
    >Finds five child ears in plastic ziplog bags from geezer's pockets
    >"Told you he was creepy"
    >GM facepalms and says the 'dark secret' part was supposed to be something less out there
    >Sheet check by the GM
    >Everyone is a murderer except gf who used to punch people for money
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)19:14 No.15582082

    No self discipline and no self control. Typically incredibly selfish.

    Plus fat people smell like old cheese.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)19:16 No.15582098
    >>"The problem with elves is they ain't got no meat on their bones."

    DO NOT say this to a hambeast. Save yourself from agony.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)19:16 No.15582102
    >>There is this hambeast that's a part of my D&D group. She throws a tantrum if we don't do what she wants to do, and she ALWAYS rolls thin elven characters.
    Is her name Linnea?
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)19:17 No.15582115
    I wish I knew a female who'd play tabletops with me.
    Seriously, my ex is the most "nerd" girl I know, and even she considers everything past mtg to be way too sad to indulge in.

    I went to a random group at my local gamestore once, but for one, the players there were all somewhere between 30 and 45, and the women were those 30-somethings that you see standing in the local bookstore, buying the latest Naruto without any shame. It was simply terrifying.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)19:17 No.15582121
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    Didn't expect that.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)19:17 No.15582123

    Dat intuition.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)19:18 No.15582135
    Does she live in missouri?
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)19:19 No.15582141
    >become super religious, disregard bitches, acquire the favor of gods etc.
    >become a warforged or whatever that means, it was mentioned ITT, it means you have NO SEXUAL DESIRE LOL
    >be a grandfather with kids and grandkids in game
    >be a dwarf
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)19:19 No.15582145
    You should play Shadowrun next; she'd fucking love it if she constantly thinks like that.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)19:20 No.15582152
    Take it to /soc/
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)19:20 No.15582158
    RP'd a halforc once who had a soon to be wife waiting at home for him to finish his manhood ritual (long story)

    fell in love with her after she killed a dire boar with her bare hands, enjoyed showing his "love scars"

    it was pretty fun
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)19:20 No.15582160
    i WILL happily say this... especially when playing an Orc barbarian.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)19:20 No.15582166
    >obese people have bad personalities

    Anta-baka, Anon-kun! Anta-baka!

    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)19:23 No.15582190
    Yeah, what is it with most tabletoppers being so goddamn old? Outside my regular group of 20-25 year olds, every other player I know is at least 33.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)19:23 No.15582195
    no self respecting (half)orc would go for some landwhale

    its meat but not the right kind of meat, come back when you can go into the wilds for 3 weeks and come back with a new fur coat and meat for a year
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)19:24 No.15582202
    I'm pretty sure the old what does /tg/ look like threads had most /tg/ users as slightly underweight, average to tall height-wise, etc

    we're only called fa/tg/uys because that's the basement-dwelling neckbeard-sporting stereotype that people generally associate with traditional games.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)19:24 No.15582216
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    Whatever you just said doesn't warrant positive feedback.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)19:25 No.15582231
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    > Or they can be disturbed and kick OP out.

    In that case, I'd say OP is probably better off.

    If your group is supporting a whorey ham-beast who attempts to control others, is trying to claim ownership over your character, force herself upon IC you AND use a combo of guilt/the-typical-male-reaction-to-crying-female to manipulate the group, then fuck those sad white-knighting faggots. Doubly so if you display how fucked up said hambeast is, and yet they still support it based 'only female syndrome'.

    Internet is full of awesome people to game with, and these might not be the only folks around who're into gaming - or who might get into it if you introduce them.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)19:26 No.15582241
    You sir, are awesome!

    (Half)Orcs FTW!
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)19:26 No.15582246
    She has an aversion toward playing fantasy or straight sci-fi, even though I've got her enthusiastic over series like Game of Thrones and Firefly.

    She's a horror movie buff and likes playing somewhat ordinary people. I know it might sound kind of boring but we've recently started a solo game where she plays a woman who inherits her father's mansion and has all kinds of crazy shit going on with her insane family. Few New World Order/Illuminati references and the peculiar way her uncle died are the only "odd things" so far.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)19:30 No.15582304
    This is my experience on the age groups for gamers:
    >40k: 13-18
    >Fantasy: 18-24
    >historical wargaming: Vietnam vets, Vietnam vets everywhere (and one guy who served in Korea)

    I don't know any female wargamers. Lots of girls roleplaying (my girlfriend is a GM actually) but nothing else.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)19:30 No.15582311
    OP you need to just dick her down

    tear that beached whale up for one good night. roll her in flower then drown her in cooking oil. she should dehydrate by the time you're done with that bulbous boat full of lard and clogged arteries. just pop some viagra and dominate the indomitable mountain of gurth until it breaks in half...

    ...then kick her out of your group. or leave your group. cos apparently they're okay with her sexually harassing your innocent character.

    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)19:32 No.15582333
    I know a psychotic lesbian that everyone just calls midget.
    She runs a Tau army.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)19:34 No.15582360

    I mean DM.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)19:35 No.15582376
    Same thing no one is going to bust your balls.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)19:35 No.15582384
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    I've only played with 4 fems; gm's way older sister, Gm's GF, and as a GM, 2 different Player's GF's, and one was slightly a hambeast, and she has been the only problem. They all tended to be less up on the rules, but I've met plenty of dumber male players

    So Slight-Ham was playing a female druid raised by wolves, and in a city of thieves, she meets the 'Mayor', whom all the character's have heard not to mess with. She then proceeds to try and flirt with him and lead him on; tl;dr, the dudes a vampire, and since she continues to flirt, he uses domination on her with intentions of sealing the deal; the other player's burst in, prevent any hanky-panky, but wounding the vampires honor, so he forces them to do some missions for him.
    Before the next session, she comes up to me and rages that rape is not ok and as women, she's extremely sensitive to it; mind you, no actual hanky-panky was done, and she was literally leading on the one person she was don't "don't mess with". Even though I feel its silly with murder, drugs, and sex being all ok so far, I agree and we roleplay the entire sitch
    -eventually she leaves the game [her BF stays on] and I hear tell she's even worse in other games
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)19:36 No.15582393
    Huh, where I live it's more like
    >40k: 15-25
    >M:tg: 15-50 (seriously, this one guy I know goes to drafts with his father, who plays a fucking mean game)
    >Fantasy P&Ps: 16-35
    >Sci-Fi P&Ps: 20-40

    Overall, the M:tg group is the socially best adjusted. The worst are the fantasy-players. They're all kinda between "this is kinda like WoW, no?" and "I always wanted to be a beautiful elf!".
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)19:37 No.15582403

    >horror movie buff and likes playing somewhat ordinary people

    Play Shadowrun.

    In the Renraku Arcology.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)19:38 No.15582419
    Forgot to mention that the wizard would also cast a simple "enlarge person"

    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)19:42 No.15582476
    I've only seen this
    >40k: 15-20
    >MtG: All ages
    >PnP: 17-60 (Most in the range of 25-40)
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)19:44 No.15582497
    Warforged Component: Shredding Hand.
    +5 to Perform with string instruments.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)19:45 No.15582511
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    Well half of my first group 3.5 was female.

    One of them was obsessed with gay robot porn. Transformers came out when we were playing. So we had that nightmare. Also she loved drawing dicks on the game board.

    The other was an /a/nimegirl. She had a crush on me which broke the group apart and started a feud that lasted through my junior and senior years of HS.

    I'll share more if anyone wants to hear.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)19:47 No.15582546
    By all means. We'll spend the rest of the thread discussing relative age groups for gaming otherwise.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)19:50 No.15582580

    He's right, please continue.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)19:52 No.15582594
    but that's what we're best at doing.

    /tg/ is built upon the bloated bodies of massive/sweeping generalizations
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)19:52 No.15582598
    Moar on both of them
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)19:53 No.15582617
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    There's this one chick who was always passing by the M:tg group I play with and she was all "Do you guys even think this is fun?"

    One day I got fed up with her and asked if she wanted to at least give it a try before she made fun of it, and if not she could go do something better with her time than harass us. She's all "Yeah, sure, right." and I guess she thought she'd be humoring a pathetic nerd by joining in for a game.

    Fast forward to now, she's hooked on Magic and she hasn't said shit about us since then. Now she's a somewhat decent member of the group, and we're all pretty much over it.

    I did what my opponents could never do. I made friends out of enemies.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)19:53 No.15582618
    We'll okay then.

    So sophomore year of HS. We started playing 3.X.

    DM is a book nerd. Total book nerd. Spends hours in the library reading fantasy and scifi.

    We got a womanizing /b/tard wantabe. He was that guy.

    Girl #1 is a total blond bitch that lies through her teeth and thinks she is so smart. She's not. She writes gay robot fanficts one of which she showed to the DM. He hasn't been the same since that. (Group broke up, we made of new group of all bros, he is DM)

    Girl #2 is a stereotypical animegirl that you would expect from /cgl/. She's nice and a total devoted christian. She would yell at us for swearing.

    Then there is me. The skinny 6'1" computer nerd who spends all his time on playing vidya.

    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)19:57 No.15582672
    Actually, on average, the women that I play with act far better than the men. There have been a couple of problems, though.

    There was a very handsy one that would snatch char sheets out of people's hands if they were taking too long to act and then tell them what they could do. She was trying to be helpful but in the rudest way possible.

    Aside from that, I do have one female player that is kind of timid. It seems like she's either intimidated with how naturally we roleplay or she just doesn't jump into scenarios as much as she could. She's nice, though, so I can't complain too much and she takes notes about EVERYTHING that's happened in the game... which has been a lifesaver a couple of times.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)19:59 No.15582709
    190cm tall, 90 kilos, work out 3 - 4 days a week for the last 5 years.

    I still call myself a fa/tg/uy with pride.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)20:01 No.15582736
    More like people with bad personalities and a fondness for tabletop tend towards to obese
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)20:01 No.15582741
    Go damn it I read it in Jura's voice.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)20:01 No.15582742
    So our session breaks down into 3 major segments where we switched the DM and try and find out who of all of us is the best one.

    First campaign we have the original DM DMing. I'm just gonna call him DM still.

    So he has a whole setting worked out for us starting us off as noobies who are being paid by the king to go find some ring in some dungeon so we can get buffed up and kill some better stuff.

    /b/tard goes Drow rogue, he uses reflex saves for everything that he thinks would need one. He also makes up bullshit rules and stuff.

    Girl#1 goes halfing druid and has her pet wolf and uses it as a mount. She has pink hair and doesn't know how to hit a wall.

    Girl#2 goes sorceress, and makes a typical elven sorceress. Super weak though and charges the enemy with all 6 of her HP instead of staying back to use spells.

    I got fighter. Human that is a total boss using a greatsword and speccing in its usage.

    So we start our first campaign and we have selected no leader, but combat works out to the natural selection between that guy and me.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)20:05 No.15582785
    Hmm well the majority of women ive associated with have no personality and since D&D isnt on MTV they dont even wanna hear what it is

    Once a friend convinced me to join in on a game he was into with a few people he met a few months before that.Turned out there two females involved which struck me as intriguing.We were going to play an elder game of OWOD Vampire.The GM didnt bother with generation restrictions and allowed everything on BJ Zanzibars shitdump of a site so the game was a total wash.The females role in the debacle included

    1] The GMs girlfriend who would often disappear for hours at a time didnt know how anything in the game worked had to be spoonfed through it by her b/f.Basically a 90 IQ no personality broad who stumbled into a b/f with nerd tendencies he didnt expect

    2] A Short single mother with glasses that was dating one of the players.They broke up about a week after I joined and left the whole group awkward.She had a really limited range of RPing ability[Either complete Dhamer style psycho or lovable street urchin] but at least she tried.We actually hung out a bit even invited her to a couple gaming sessions with my friends but she ended up going crazy abandoning her kid and joining a cult in Canada.Again very awkward
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)20:07 No.15582811
    Is it bad that I've had no real horror stories with female players?
    I mean, the worst was when a girl whined for a while about wanting her elf to be 5'7" and beautiful, but the DM calmed her down and she forgot about it. And even that was more annoying than anything.
    All of the THAT GUYs I've experienced were male.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)20:07 No.15582812
    I dominate in combat(read: am the only person who can play at all). So I am unofficial chosen by the DM to be the leader.

    We spend a few session going through the dungeon killing shit and get the ring and get our reward.

    Then we start with that guy's campaign. Picking off rather well from the first campaign that left us all at level 3.

    DM guy starts playing and roles a cleric/paladin multiclass that can hell me out the butt.

    We go into this old dungeon where we have to kill some big bad leader or something.

    This is where shit gets really weird.
    >> Axel the Possum 07/14/11(Thu)20:08 No.15582830
    >Eclipse Phase game
    >Two bros with gaming experience
    >One bros girlfriend asks to join the game
    >Say why not, it's her first time playing any roleplaying game
    >She immediately chooses to play the Lost (psychics with crazy mental problems). I wince but I take a chance
    >She proceeds to be one of the best roleplayers I've met in an IRL game. She plays every one of her mental disorders perfectly.
    >She soon has turned her pet cat into a cybernetic spy, and is actually very valuable to the plot, both in character and meta. Makes a lot of laughs happen.

    Everything went better than expected. One of her mental disorders was an obsession with wasting liquid, which made her do things like start a wealth-class riot against a company that wasted valuable water, and she carried a shop-vac with her that she obsessively uses to clean up any blood lost in combat.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)20:08 No.15582835
    My friend's girlfriend is taking part in a continuation of an old campaign our resident DM is doing.

    She rolled a Myr. She rolled a customized construct with minor Enchantment magic and a tiny pet dragon.

    So far the only thing she's done is shrink herself down to ride on the dragon, which has the ability to deliver a sleeping toxin on a successful attack. We were fighting the minions of a powerful mage who stayed up and away from the battle in the air. She flew up and stung her while the rest of us fought the things attacking our ship.

    This whole time, I'm Searing Raying ghouls into ash and just thinking, politely, "Why?"
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)20:10 No.15582853
    Does she live near Boston? I wish I knew a fat D&D-playing girl! :(
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)20:11 No.15582860
    Hah! Not true, not universally anyway. I've got a fondness for tabletop and according to some a bad personality yet I'm 1,81 meter tall and weigh only 55kg. Perhaps either my personality isn't bad enough as I'm only a dick some of the time or it's the fact that I do quite a lot of speed...
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)20:13 No.15582880
    Stimulants does have a tendency to make you thin as a side-effect, our mystery is solved
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)20:13 No.15582881
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    >OWOD Vampire
    >Elder game
    >No generation restrictions
    >BJ Zanzibar
    >ST's GF
    >Dumb as a rock
    >Single Mother
    >Joins a cult in Canada
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)20:14 No.15582905
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    So he starts adding shit that the girls like. At one point we had Bumblebee from transformers as a party member. He also had statue traps that have crossbows in the crotch. He gave each of the girls pickles and bananas. He's also the guy that made the you hear stairs thing that I have seen posted once or twice around here.

    He flooded the group with gold and power weapons. Then made us fight the leader, who proceeded to kick our asses up and down the street because he spent more time playing with the girl's sexual desires than give us monsters to fight.

    He actually dry humped Girl#1 once after a session. He got a ride home with her that night, I don't think anything happened but it was so awkward the next session.

    Which was my turn to DM.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)20:19 No.15582960

    I have a friend that's a girl who plays D&D and likes yaoi robot sex too. What's with roleplaying girls and robot raoi?
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)20:20 No.15582968
    OP, play a D&D version of this character and laugh at the resulting massacre when she tries putting the moves on you.
    Pic related as its the character I'm speaking of.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)20:21 No.15582976
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    Captcha ate my pic
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)20:24 No.15583010

    I read this everytime it's posted. Fucking legendary.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)20:25 No.15583032
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    So this is turning into a more That Guy rant but it changes here.

    So my dungeon for those of you that know of Charlie the Grey Render, this is the dungeon he came from.

    Well I had forgotten to write my dungeon so I made it up 1 hour before the session started using my monster manual and all my session of vidya.

    Started off with a town siege and then they had to go and kill the General ork.

    What had happened before this was that Girl#2 asked that guy to a dance and he refused, then Girl #1 had been asked by That Guy to the dance and she said no. So everyone is hating on each other and they did it, in game. You ever see a drow rogue fight a halfling druid and an elven Sorceress? Then the DM who is a cleric/pally is sitting there not stopping anything and is just healing everyone when they drop to the negatives.

    This is happening inside a town siege where orcs are coming left and right. They switch between waling on each other and waling on the orcs. It was like a kung fu movie where the kung fu masters are fighting each other but also working together against some army that is attacking during their fight.

    Pic related, that's what I was doing with my DM manual.
    >> stoner-guy !fsDWdCQiRo 07/14/11(Thu)20:28 No.15583066
    Are you from NC, dude?
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)20:28 No.15583077
    Huzzah! On to the next case!

    Slightly more on topic: I've had little to no bad experiences with girl-gamers. So far I've met five and played with three of them. Only problem, and it barely even qualifies as that, was that one of my friends sisters had watched too much LotR just before joining our D&D game and wanted to model her Halfling Rogue on Frodo a tad too much. But that was solved after explaining the setting and the lack of invisibility-rings for the foreseeable future and she proved a good addition to the table afterwards. She never brought any food or drinks to the game but made more than up for that by making us all custom beer mugs in her art schools pottery class. Big cream coloured, double glazed mugs that can hold over a pint of beer and have our names in bas relief on the handles and heraldic shields with our characters initials entwined on the front. We fucking love those mugs and use 'm every time we play but I can't help but suspect our drinking during sessions has increased sharply because of them...
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)20:29 No.15583082
    That story never gets old. I kind of hope I'll get into a Vampire game with a couple of toreador-playing goth types so I can play a happy vampire who's completely comfortable with himself. The opportunities for trolling will be immense.

    In the first VtM game I played, there were 5 players, 3 female, 2 male (male ST). THAT GUY was a dude, and the other guy was troll-tastic but he was hilarious so he was fine.

    But THAT GUY got us into so much trouble (despite the fact that he was the only one who had played the system before) that we all ganged up him and i diablerized him. It was glorious. He ragequit after that.
    I did catch a lot of shit from NPCs though for being ugly, because I had the lowest Appearance score in the party (2, which in WoD terms puts you at average). It was weird.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)20:30 No.15583091
    Trying to convince people to be gay, think about gays and talk to gays.

    Now who's being meta...
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)20:31 No.15583099
    >making custom mugs for your gaming group

    This is... quite literally the nicest thing I've ever heard a player do.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)20:34 No.15583132

    Yeah that picture was pretty much my reaction.The whole group was fucked up and stupid beyond belief
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)20:35 No.15583141
    So far, not too bad. Played with one girl who borrowed a card and never gave it back, but I can live with that - knowing her, it was probably genuine forgetfulness, and it wasn't valuable. Another was my girlfriend, whose only problem was an inability to play anything non-good. That and declining to read the rulebook, instead figuring she'd work it out. Last was a friend's girlfriend, who needed to speak up more, but was otherwise good. Don't game with any of them anymore, we just drifted apart. Still with the girl, which is nice.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)20:41 No.15583203

    I'm sitting there with him face against my hand for the whole session while they continue to sort out their anger problem with each other.

    They actually finished off the orcs and then started fighting the town militia and guard when they tried to stop the fight.

    The fight ended with the DM guy stopping his heals waiting for the last man standing which was the Drow to stop. Then he walked up to the girls and healed them again holding a one with his body and had his sword on the other's throat and hand his fist raised at the Drow with smite evil ready. The Drow had gone from chaotic neutral to chaotic evil.

    This is where the session ended. And Girl#1 gave That Guy a ride home still. I don't even.

    So next session they finished the dungeon thanks to Charlie the Grey Render, that story is saved some where.

    Then it was Girl#2 turn to DM a session and she wanted me to help her make it. The following day she told me she had a crush on me and wanted to go on a date. I told her I don't think it would be okay but apparently everyone had okayed us dating. So being stupid I told her after we finished her dungeon.


    So I have to deal with this for a total of 18 hours. Broken down into 3 separate work sessions.

    The worst part is that That Guy moved away and Girl#1 got mad at me for being forced into saying okay because she thought it was a joke about us dating. So we never used the dungeon. I have it sitting around here to.

    And that is why in our new group we have no girls at all and are all total bros.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)20:44 No.15583226
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    >forsaking makeouts for campaign writing
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)20:46 No.15583251
    Misogyny thread? Misogyny thread!
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)20:48 No.15583266
    I don't have a horror story about female gamers per se, but I do have a story about what happened when I took my girlfriend into a GW a few weeks ago. General theme is just how socially inept some of those guys are.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)20:49 No.15583272
    There have been two.

    >My girlfriend
    She's too god damn quiet. Doesn't really like playing because of it.

    >My friend's girlfriend
    She can be annoying but she's usually alright. Her boyfriend tends to be the DM so you'd expect there to be tons of horror stories there of him favoring her; thankfully he takes the game a lot more seriously than that and treats her evenly.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)20:49 No.15583276
    Truely awesome.
    I demand you seal her in a ziploc bag until the technology to clone her on a production level exists.
    The world needs more girl gamers like this one.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)20:56 No.15583358
    First of all, I feel like I should point out that my girlfriend is not the most stunningly beautiful specimen of a woman (unless she's made the effort to dress herself up, which she rarely does and I am totally okay with), but then that's not why I'm dating her.
    Anyway, I'd left some stuff at the local GW while I met her for lunch, and we eventually made it back there afterwards to pick up my case. Now see, she's not a big gamer but adores fluff, being the only person I've ever met who can match my appetite for fantasy novels and the like, so she occasionally steals my 40K codices and reads them. While we're there, she does something she's never done before.

    She asks me for a casual game of 40k.
    >> stoner-guy !fsDWdCQiRo 07/14/11(Thu)20:59 No.15583382
    Was she a fattie, anon?
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)21:00 No.15583392
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    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)21:01 No.15583398
    Sorry but she is a crazy religious nutcase that wouldn't let me go past 2nd base. She's a ham beast and weighs more than me. She isn't that attractive.

    I wouldn't get shit out of this.

    Also I would rather not have her giving me uber stuff just because I'm her boytoy.

    I am a man of principal, that's why I roll a pally now.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)21:02 No.15583407
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)21:03 No.15583431
    Break principle. Fuck bitches. Get cool shit. Kill NPCs. Become blackguard.
    >> BK 07/14/11(Thu)21:05 No.15583454
    Haven't had any problems with girl gamers in my time. I save my animosity for the sore losers in my MtG/40k groups. Really, the only weird thing to happen to me with girls and gaming is that one of the better gals in our MtG group works with my mom.
    >> stoner-guy !fsDWdCQiRo 07/14/11(Thu)21:06 No.15583461
    I understand. I'm a fat piece of shit, but for some reason I just find fat chicks repulsive. I'm actually dieting and exercising nowadays.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)21:07 No.15583471
    I'm pretty okay with this, since I have my Blood Angels and my Grey Knights (jumpers and footsloggers, respectively) on me. She wants to play with the BAs, so we grab a table, unpack and stuff.
    The GW staff at that shop are bro as hell. I've met some awful black/redshirts in my time, but these guys feel more like they're running a FLGS than anything else. We hit them up for the store stock so we can play around with lists, and this is where shit starts going south. The presence of a bona fide GIRL in the store is noticed by the neckbeards inherent to GW stores, and a couple of them start watching with interest. As it becomes apparent that we're working on our lists, one of Those Guys makes his presence known to my girlfriend by peering over her shoulder at her list. From about three inches away.
    This particular guy seems to fancy himself an expert on Blood Angels, and starts giving "advice" to the tune of "oh, those are shit, don't use them" (about VVs) and generally attempting to ghostwrite a list. She's very polite and such, I'm about to say something when one of the staff calls him out and he's forced back to the painting table. For several minutes.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)21:08 No.15583480
    I've gamed with several female players, they weren't really a problem. There is one land whale that plays at my store, but she's married to a nut job (not dangerous, but he's still crazy), and I refuse to be in a game with her because she hits every bad gamer stereotype except wearing glasses.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)21:10 No.15583508
    I don't have that problem.

    I'm skinny by nature. I'm 6'2" and 125lbs.

    I don't want to date a girl who is much larger than me.

    I think Girl#2 had a crush on me, she was crazy though with the whole I love gay robot yaoi shit and being a crazy liar. I would have fucked her though, after 2 years I know she still has never had a boyfriend.

    Probably because she is crazy
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)21:17 No.15583573
    what about the 'overly (and unwarrentedly) elitist' stereotype, does she hit that one too?
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)21:22 No.15583619
    Sorry, but your dilemma reminded me of Teds band the Worthless Peons.
    >if we loose him, we loose all our sex appeal. He's the only one with hair.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)21:26 No.15583659
    He returns, along with most of the store, as we finish deploying. I'm trying to teach her the basics of Warhammer, but it's incredibly difficult to do so when you have an entire table edge of neckbeards hovering around cutting me off every five seconds with more 'advice' for her or offering to lend her dice (seriously, what the fuck). Anything she and I say along the lines of "go away" is pretty much ignored, and even the occasional intervention of a blackshirt keeps them at bay for a few minutes before they start drifting back.
    By about Turn 3 she's confused as fuck. It's pretty much what you'd expect having several socially inept neckbeards (them) and one slightly less socially inept non-neckbeard (me) trying to explain a game at once, with the former recommending EVERY. SINGLE. MOVE. We manage to play for Turn 5, a draw thanks to the wonders of Capture and Control, and luckily the game ends. We pretty much pile my shit back into the case amid offers of painting/gaming lessons and leave, and she asks me if it's always like that. I feel awful about the whole thing when I say that no, it's usually far more enjoyable.

    GOOD END: Apparently the creepy neckbeard regulars got a hell of a talking to by the manager when he heard about it. Threats made, all that sort of thing. Next time I was in the shop I got given a gift voucher to pass on to my girlfriend as an apology of sorts (serious bros). I chipped in and bought her some Harlequins to paint, and she seems pretty happy with that at the moment. But really, it was probably one of the worst tabletop experiences I've ever had, and my FLGS has a That Guy Space Wolves player.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)21:43 No.15583818
    I know how you feel. I used to play AT-43 with my GF at my LGS. While we didn't stop entirely because of socially inept fatguys, they certainly influenced it.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)21:45 No.15583833
    I've had three girls in my group.
    One is a long-time friend of mine and fucking loves it. As long as she gets to murderise something she's happy; she actually told me I need to work in more gory descriptions into Mordheim somehow. I don't even know how.
    The other is the girlfriend of That Fucking Guy. While he's off murdering, raping, being lolevil and generally making me want to beat him unconsious with a rulebook, she just sits there being quiet and cute. I can't understand how she ended up with a guy who smelled like fucking roadkill when I met him last.
    The last girl needs me to explain everything to her. EVERYTHING. At least twice. And she's planning on GMing now I've ditched their group...
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)21:50 No.15583891
    The only female player I've played with has been my gf. She only plays big and hairy men, but plays them well.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)21:55 No.15583944
    >Next time I was in the shop I got given a gift voucher to pass on to my girlfriend as an apology of sorts (serious bros)
    you either have the most awesome GW's in the world or it was the most awful experience ever. Maybe both.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)21:58 No.15583969
    You should roll a female character next time, and have your new character make advanced on her character. Just role play a woman properly in the process!
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)21:59 No.15583979

    I'm going to bet she starts playing tyranids
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)22:03 No.15584003
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    Play with a group of half women in D&D. They're all pretty decent.

    My WoD group, on the other hand, is eh. Token crazy guy tried to "replace" me, as I'm the token female. So now we have a human Mary Sue self insert from the other girl, and I'm still in the game. And crazy guy ragequit after like, two games. Could be worse, I know WoD attracts some bad stuff.

    And to make it relevant besides my non-complaints. I guess I uh. Ship characters. A lot. But I don't force it into the game, so everyone just makes jokes about it. And occasionally writes me fanfiction. Awww yeah.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)22:05 No.15584020
    I don't care if it's a sausage-fest, D&D really is better when it's just a couple of guys sitting around a table.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)22:05 No.15584023
    The fuck is a half woman? A daemonette? A bisexual demiurge's flesh golem? A siamese twin with one sex change?
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)22:07 No.15584052
    This. If she wants erotic stuff, give her lesbians (hopefully she's homophobic).
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)22:09 No.15584073
    I knew my wording was off. I game with Daemonettes, obviously. And all of them play reasonable characters, such as that cute little cleric with some sort of giant magic bee. Fucking bees.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)22:10 No.15584086
    heres a run down of the game girls in my group

    Hambeast 1: "I run away... 'cause i'm squishy". her character isn't, runs at the first sign of danger. Infuriatingly quiet and indecisive. Had a personal quest to take of a Guild in a major town, back out due to indecisiveness. Also she smells (sometimes), and can't handle any horror themes at all. after nearly 3 years couldn't remember where anything was on her character sheet.

    Hambeast 2: aka "veteran roll player of 20+ years" "HERP DERP WHAT CAN I DO?!? LOOOOOOL" and "I DON'T KNOW! LOL" are her responses to being asked what she is going to do. Don't knwo if she knew how to use a character sheet. her turns generally took 5+ minutes of "LOL I DUNNO".

    Gamer Girl 3: Pretty cool, knows her shit and knows how to RP. thank you for know how to fill out a character sheet :D a little random with OOC comments. a fairly recent Newbie.

    Gamer Girl 4: Roleplays really well and enjoys combat, almost as much as me and another player. ALround top gamer/friend :)

    Gamer Girl 5: Good RP'er for a newbie, really got into the swing of things fast. wasn't entirely sure what was and wasn't possible due to newbishness (which is acceptable)

    Gamer Girl 6: I GM'd for her for her first and only game. Amazing RP'er. Fell into the game & system like she was a veteran player. Great character concept. Well made and executed.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)22:13 No.15584107
    >be female
    >hear stories about horrible girl players
    >hear stories about creeper neckbeards
    >fortunately I'm engaged
    >hear stories about couples making games terrible and should not be allowed

    I'm never going to find a group.
    Maybe I'll wait till I'm a stay at home mommy and try to convert some housewives. "Scrapbooking? Well, that's fun too, but how about we try this game?"
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)22:14 No.15584116
    "I'm sorry, I am actually part elven myself, and you see.. well you look just like my great grandmother..."
    >> helpful comrade 07/14/11(Thu)22:17 No.15584157
    Housewife gamers
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)22:19 No.15584179
    So I've been reading this thread for a while, thinking I have nothing to contribute, because most of the females I've gamed with have been either someone's GF or good GM themselves. But >>15583358 >>15583471
    Made me remember a story of scaring off some females who had literally JUST sat down to chat with us. Ya see, we were in the college lounge. I was playing the extreme neutral type. Balance in all things. If he did good he had to balance it. So we had LITERALLY just saved the whole village, we were partying, and I was propositioned by a whore. So I had a lot of evil to do to counter my current good karma. (Enter the women) Now, I'm a serious Roleplayer. I try not to break character when I'm in the middle of something. These poor women walk into my accepting of the whore's advances, and then my subsequent murder of her, and dragging her corpse out to the town lake. During my little speech, (Female GM encouraged me to keep going) the poor girls looked kinda sick and excused themselves to the bathroom. I sighed, and one of the neckbeards at the table said, "Why'd you scare them off?" I looked him in the eyes and disgusted with myself let loose on the dude. "Because you smell like ass!! AND you're wearing a shirt three sizes too small saying you love LOLIS!!" After that I just got up and left.
    Later on, I saw the girls in the lunch line, so I walked up to them and apologized for my rant scaring them off only to hear, "Oh no! It wasn't you! You were hilarious! It was the stinky guy in the tiny shirt! It smelled horrible sitting next to him!"
    I stopped. I blinked, and then bought lunch and found they were actually RPers themselves, and THAT was why they had sat down. I got a new group that didn't smell like butt from my murder rant. I was a happy camper.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)22:25 No.15584236
    After my initial, less than pleasant GW shop, this one was seriously like a breatch of fresh air. They let us use the store armies, let us use the store paints and - most importantly - don't try to push shit on you. You ask the staff about where to go next and these guys explain all your options in enough detail for you to get the gist of things.
    I also go drinking with two of them on Fridays after they get off work so yeah, pretty bro.

    I prefer the FLGS in terms of people who hang out there. Lot of new blood (kids) but also a refreshing lack of creepy fatguys. Sadly we still have a That Guy who runs like three different codices as one army citing "fluff" but hey, can't have it all.

    Probably. Every girl I've met in the 40k hobby plays Nids or DEldar. The best painter I've ever met was this one girl who was painting insane galaxies - on a Zoanthrope's chitin. As a GD entry.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)22:27 No.15584261
    >>sorry, guys, I gotta leave the bar early. wifey's invited her friends over. I can't wait!
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)22:28 No.15584263
    >fortunately I'm engaged

    You should play two player games (one D/GM and one player) and also try out table top wargaming with your husband and/or wife. I suggest games like; Uncharted Seas, Infinity, and Dystopian wars.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)22:30 No.15584289
    hoenstly. This right here is a good thing, You can either game together, or do seperate things on that night. have your own things to do.

    Which is really important in a relationship, and I wish my gf could realize this.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)22:32 No.15584320
    > crazy religious nutcase

    Of which of the very different and not all theistic religions of the world is she?
    >> 083 !!I8ggLdPk6t6 07/14/11(Thu)22:39 No.15584393
    Only had one female in my local group, shit did not go well.

    She was my friend's lady at the time (though, for reasons I won't go into I ended up with her for some time, not a wise decision on my part), and he was an awful DM and player. Seriously, it got so bad that we had to kick him from the group.

    She would always, always, always play the same damned thing: female elven ranger with no personality.

    She was basically nothing more than a walking bow.

    Some things she did that annoyed during the game:
    >Had to play topless, which I was fine with at first, but for reasons beyond the scope of this thread it became an issue.
    >Always had to be the LOLRANDUMB person.
    >Just could not figure out anything on her own.
    >Made every damned thing sexual to the point where it was sickening.

    Best memory of her in the group:

    Her boyfriend was DMing at the time (mostly we were just humoring him because he would pester us about it so often. The game was fairly enjoyable at first, before she joined. Basically the other player and I were just being the biggest cockasses we could be, he was fallen noble warlock and I his right-hand man. Our goal was to gather our forces and retake his throne, but along the way we were the most chaotic assholes in existence. Bitch didn't bring me my ale on time? Gauntleted fist to the stomach. Child says something stupid? Eldritch blast to the mouth.

    Of course, it became considerable less fun when the DMPC was introduced. My god, that guy was a complete shit and the DM would focus on his description to a ridiculous point. Can't remember how many times he informed me that his sword looked awesome.

    So, then the bitch joins, right? Her character hardly talked and when party conflict came up she asked, and I quote: "Can I just pretend there's mice behind me and stomp on them? Ohh, kittens."


    >> 083 !!I8ggLdPk6t6 07/14/11(Thu)22:40 No.15584398
    Cont. from >>15584393

    That party conflict ends with my character killing the DMPC, the 'boss' we were 'supposed' to fight later coming into the tavern (in another region from where he's supposed to be) and starting up a fight. The warlock dies, I'm knocked unconscious and the big guy leaves. When I came back to consciousness I took the female character back north with me and we lived the rest of our lives boning in a tower, because fuck that guy.

    Dammit, all my hate for that guy practically warrants a new thread.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)22:45 No.15584449
    >Had to play topless, which I was fine with at first, but for reasons beyond the scope of this thread it became an issue.

    Lets say this IS within the scope of this thread. I must know more.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)22:47 No.15584469
    Yeah, hold on. Do you mean with a bra on or did she just let her titties hang out all the time?
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)22:49 No.15584480

    I'm not sure where we're going with this. We are talking about the character, correct?
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)22:55 No.15584531
    Oh, you mean in-character. That makes more sense. The PLAYER playing topless could be pretty cool but also extremely distracting.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)22:56 No.15584542
    Thats what we're trying to find out. Did here CHAR have to be topless? From the sound of your post it was the PLAYER.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)22:57 No.15584551
    well, the fiancee is into MtG. Personally I don't get it, but I support it when he wants to go to tourneys or friday night magic. I accompany him every now and then when he's shopping, but there was this one shop where the wall of absolute REEK kept me the fuck out.

    From experience, the fiancee and I don't really play well together. He's a min-maxer, and as a GM his stories make me cringe; the last time he tried to run something with me, my sister, and a friend his DMPC's were a crazy old wizard and a magic loli. Which after I derailed with premature BBEG killing he stopped running it.
    And that's fine with me, he's a strategist. I'm not.
    >> 083 !!I8ggLdPk6t6 07/14/11(Thu)22:59 No.15584572

    I'll humor the thought, I suppose. It is an interesting story, at least.

    Completely topless.
    At first this was okay, then it started getting weird as hell.

    You'd think.

    >Had to play topless, which I was fine with at first, but for reasons beyond the scope of this thread it became an issue.

    Alright, so here's what happens. I was pretty good friends with her boyfriend at the time and they had just recently started seeing eachother, first time she had ever seen me she's already comfortable enough to be around topless. Now, that should have thrown up a red flag or two, but for whatever reason it didn't. She was fun enough to have around at first, though being around her too long it became painfully obvious she had no real personality.

    So, we played ourselves a good deal of card games at the time (M:tG and L5R mostly) and she was happy enough to join in on that, though she certainly wasn't very good at either and eventually that dnd game happened (and a couple others that I might go into, a couple good laughs to be had there.) I took her...let's say 'openness' as just some harmless personality issue at first, seemed like she just needed the attention, and who am I to judge? Maybe she was messed up from some previous experience. So, the toplessness and such wasn't much of an issue.

    I can already tell this is going to have to be multiple posts, go fetch some popcorn, folks.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)23:03 No.15584594
    I'm currently playing mutants and master minds with three girls. One's the psychic who summons energy stuffed animals but is also an illusionist who helped me interrogate three criminals over lava. One is basically the question (her name is the Quandry) so she helps out tactically and is kinda quiet. the third girl is a speedster and lightning user who is very handy combat wise and has been the character pointing out the issues with our group not acting like a team at first (normal problem but it's all good now).

    Only problem I have is that I actually like girl three but I'm getting mixed signals of she'll never go out with me to she's interested. I have told her in the past but she said she didn't think it'd work out. to kinda solve it I have a sidekick / love interest.

    in short. I really haven't had to play with really crazy females in the past but that's because I knew them all realitively well when I started a group with them. Sorry to hear that some of you got stuck with some of the really crazy ones.
    >> 083 !!I8ggLdPk6t6 07/14/11(Thu)23:05 No.15584611

    Now, I'm a red-blooded American man, so I took no issue with her just letting the girls hang out all night. It wasn't until a month later that shit started getting real weird.

    See, turns out she was kind of into me, and as you might assume from that previous post she isn't exactly a chaste lady, and you can imagine how her boyfriend would react to finding that out, right?

    Well, you'd be horribly, horribly wrong.

    He didn't seem to have any issue with all the overt flirting she would do with me and even seemed to encourage that behavior. Apparently it amused him, which will get real funny later.

    So, at first, it was nothing too harmful she would just do some flirting, insist on being topless (though, that's nothing special with her she just does it all the time.), and would always bring it into the gaming, which I figured she was handling all that entirely in character at the time and didn't catch on to what she was getting at.

    Then it got weird.
    Real weird.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)23:06 No.15584618
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    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)23:10 No.15584651

    ITT neckbeards who never talk to girls complain about them and sensible people realize that people of both genders are usually assholes.
    >> 083 !!I8ggLdPk6t6 07/14/11(Thu)23:11 No.15584666

    Okay, so we were enjoying ourselves a game of...I actually cannot recall the name of the game, but it was some silly card game about selling weed. She didn't feel like playing, so she spent most of the time either behind me on the couch or trying to get in my lap. Not so bad, right?

    Well, we had been playing for a while and I decided I wanted to sit a round out and chill on the couch for a bit. Next thing I know that crazy bitch is on top of me, naked, shoving her tongue down my throat. Now, of course, I'm a little shocked by that and spend the first few seconds of that just like 'wat.'

    She starts digging around in my pants and nearly rapes me right there. (Now, had she not been with my friend I would have been alright with this arrangement, I like dominant chicks.) Now, I'm a firm believer that a man should never have his erect penis out in the same room as any of his male friends, but she apparently didn't share that thought.

    It gets weirder...
    >> Sweet Soul Bro !!H5XdMKmBv5G 07/14/11(Thu)23:13 No.15584690
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)23:14 No.15584701
    My gaming group has more chicks than guys for some reason.

    I find that crazy girls don't like being around other girls (hence why some like to be around a group of male neckbeards). At some point I luck out and my group attracted one good female roleplayer who then brought her roleplaying friends over. This small group then attracted more sane female roleplayers, one of which lead me to /tg/ (via 4chan).

    My guess is that sane female are attracted to each other due to safety in numbers. While crazy female don't like being around other female due to competition.

    I remember when I started gaming there was a skank (In hindsight this is the best name I can give her) who was some street rat attention whore (The pregnancy scare type attention whore). One of our awesome forever GM nearly married this girl (As much I this guy was a awesome GM, I feel sorry that nearly all his relationships have been Jerry Springer worthy). Finally she went interstate (most likely due to debt collector) and she now she who shall not be named.
    >> Glassberg Never 07/14/11(Thu)23:14 No.15584710
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    >First session with a new party
    >Playing at a bro's house
    >His girlfriend is there and wants to play after I try to explain what D&D Is
    >They're both already stoned and drinking
    >She wants to play something pretty, ends up as a Halfling Cleric; he wants to play a Mindflayer
    >Play for three hours with only a handful of smoke breaks, have a wonderful time and everyone complemented me on how fantastic I was.

    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)23:15 No.15584720
    It can't get much weirder. You just said you were gaming, and she's now naked, and trying to screw you. Her BF joining is only par for the course.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)23:16 No.15584737

    :| WAT.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)23:16 No.15584741

    Probably an NTR fetishist.

    Disgusting creatures.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)23:18 No.15584747

    That's what she said!

    I feel so dirty...
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)23:19 No.15584760

    Seriously, just because you squeezed that little shit out doesnt give you a pass from earning your keep.
    >> 083 !!I8ggLdPk6t6 07/14/11(Thu)23:25 No.15584810
    >Oh neat, I'm Satan.

    So, naturally I'm a little weirded out at this point.
    They keep coming over and this shit happens (though, to a lesser degree) for months. You would think that he'd take issue with it by now, right? Nope.

    Hell, it even got to the point where she was referring to me as her 'second boyfriend.' I told them both I wasn't exactly comfortable with this situation and that she needed to calm her shit down, before she ends up wrecking everyone's relationships with one another.

    Does that do anything?
    No, no it does not.
    Apparently my resistance only makes her harder.

    So, for about five months this shit goes on and it gets very annoying. I mean, I'm a sexual enough a guy and all, but sometimes it's nice to have people around without being sexually assaulted.

    It comes to a crescendo around her birthday.

    About a week or two before her birthday they come over for no particular reason, and we have a decent enough time, got in some Guitar Hero and I think a game or two of Magic. Her boyfriend then decides he's going to go head over to our other friend's house for a bit and leaves her there.

    Now, again I'm just left thinking 'wat.'

    So, that night ends in the most awkward blowjob ever.

    Now, you might be thinking that's where this whole things peaks, right? No, it somehow manages to get weirder from there.

    So, her birthday comes up and we do usual birthday stuff. We hang out for a good portion of the day, go to the coffee shop, that sort of thing. We played some BoyScout Monopoly, even.

    That night we're back at my house, playing some Magic which she decides to sit out on. At some point she just comes out and asks if I'd like to fuck. Again, all my wat.
    Now, I know it makes me a horrible friend to that guy and all, but I went through with it. I said 'if you'll leave me alone with all that, sure.'
    >> 083 !!I8ggLdPk6t6 07/14/11(Thu)23:27 No.15584820

    So, then the next thing I know I'm having sex with my friend's girlfriend on the stairs of an abandoned house while he's off somewhere smoking and playing Guitar Hero. Wat.

    Oh, now here's where shit gets real fucked.
    Later that night I get a call from his cell phone.
    It's her, asking if she can stay the night with me, apparently she was kicked out of his house.
    She breaks it off with him and the next month we bone erryday. It was weird, guilty, guilty sex.

    Now, they're married and he joined the army to support this useless slut.

    The end.

    Oh, forgot to mention she was sort of pregnant at the time.
    With a different guy's baby, but it's okay he died already.

    And that, friends, is the story of how I lost my v-card in an abandoned house to my friend's pregnant fiance.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)23:28 No.15584831
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)23:28 No.15584835
    >>>Now, I'm a firm believer that a man should never have his erect penis out in the same room as any of his male friends, but she apparently didn't share that thought.

    It's Bukake Time.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)23:29 No.15584839
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    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)23:29 No.15584840
    Because she was topless.
    >> Glassberg Never 07/14/11(Thu)23:29 No.15584844
    I have no face.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)23:29 No.15584851
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    Oh god for the fucks sake!

    I thought her CHARACTER was topless which I know it could be something awesome at start but would have several practical issues later on.

    But the PLAYER being topless around sounds much exciting on the IDEA, but hell, the worst thing I had was some moneyshot comments a (female) friend of my ex-girlfriend made when I was dating and that left me blushing red as Khrone's sword (I'm keen of violence but very very embarrassed when it comes to sex). And boners aside, having a dude's girlfriend with her tits out around even good friend and both being OK with that is pretty much as sign of "there's something WRONG here".

    But hell boners aside, that is dead awkward.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)23:30 No.15584856
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    Did you eat reece's puff cereal? That would have made the story better.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)23:31 No.15584875
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    >> MR. RAGE !D9l9S8Lio6 07/14/11(Thu)23:32 No.15584884

    >> Farseer TL:DR !!Q79R4DTM9gj 07/14/11(Thu)23:34 No.15584894
    I've been playing /tg/s for 20 years... plenty of chicks played with... never ONCE has there been a topless player. Someone needs to archive this, naow.
    >> Sweet Soul Bro !!H5XdMKmBv5G 07/14/11(Thu)23:34 No.15584900
    I don't..I just..

    I'm going to have a drink.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)23:34 No.15584902
    Well shit, that fucking story.

    I'm gonna just sit for a bit, and.. why didn't you do anything? You just sort of enabled her.. passively..wrap my head around this.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)23:35 No.15584907

    A shitty fapfic would be an improvement, but that sounds like someone's idea of how horrible one's erotic humor can be on a shitty MTV 'fake' reality show.
    >> 083 !!I8ggLdPk6t6 07/14/11(Thu)23:35 No.15584915

    Haven't had Reese's Puff cereal in years, man.


    Yeah, like I said it should have thrown up some red flags.

    I'm a watmagnet, apparently.

    Now, had that situation not taking a sharp turn into wat country it wouldn't have been so bad.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)23:36 No.15584919
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    what is this i dont even... how did it even get that far???
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)23:36 No.15584922
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    I'm pretty sure everyone here is aware that hambeasts with their tits out jacking you off under the table are -not- average.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)23:36 No.15584925
    Should we archive this?
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)23:36 No.15584926
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    Quite a.... uh... story you got there.

    Did you ever find your v-card?
    >> Sweet Soul Bro !!H5XdMKmBv5G 07/14/11(Thu)23:37 No.15584933
    >Yeah, like I said it should have thrown up some red flags.

    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)23:39 No.15584953
    >b'awww you're not choosing to do what I want you to do!

    Thanks for assuming that my fiancee and I haven't discussed this in great detail ahead of time and agreed on what we'd do when the time comes.
    Just because I choose to be a stay at home mom doesn't mean I expect others to do the same. I'm not having any children until I'm in a position to support being a stay at home mother, which is possible because my future hubby doesn't have a shitty career. If I want to go back to work after I have kids, it'll be in the field of childcare probably running an in home day care, because I love to work with kids.

    Thanks for trolling, try again later.
    >> 083 !!I8ggLdPk6t6 07/14/11(Thu)23:40 No.15584965

    I don't blame you.

    I told her constantly I wasn't interested, but that only seemed to make her weird lady-boner harder, so to speak. Did pretty much everything short of slapping her, which probably would have only sped up the process.

    Thankfully, she's the only one I've encountered that was that ridiculous. I've known a couple other female gamers and none of them come close to that. One wants me to run a game with the BoEF, but that's nowhere near as bad.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)23:41 No.15584966

    Yeah, that's a whole different kind of WHAT THE FUCK.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)23:41 No.15584967
    That's a great line.

    You weren't too attached to your virginity, were you?
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)23:42 No.15584978
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    I have two girls in my group (both girlfriends). One made a good character that fits really well with the setting, but she's super quiet and nervous,m and she's not comfortable with the rules, so she usually doesnt do anything until dragged into the spotlight (usually by combat), then she jsut does a basic attack. I tried putting her in more social situations but I saw it physically made her uncomfortable so I let her sideline.

    The other was a pretty straight gamer, and actually pretty generic now that I think of it. Cool person/player/character, a neat idea now and then, rolled with the story...

    I've never had a bad experience with women in our games, but I did narrowly dodge an encounter with one of our friend's girlfriends who was thinking about it, one of those super-annoying, lolrandumb types... "sorry bro, I can't handle any more players".
    >> 083 !!I8ggLdPk6t6 07/14/11(Thu)23:44 No.15584995
    Not a hambeast, even. She was actually fairly attractive.
    That whole being pregnant thing didn't become a problem 'til toward the end, and she's already dropped most of the weight. I suspect drugs.

    Nope, pretty sure she still has it.

    Because I am only a man?
    I had the willpower to stave it off for five months, at least.
    >> Wolenber 07/14/11(Thu)23:46 No.15585014
    Don't worry, I know a lot of female gamers who are simply amazing.

    But all of these stories are completely believable.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)23:46 No.15585018
    it's okay bro- you can fake it on your wedding night.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)23:46 No.15585022
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    oh man that is fucking messed up I couldn't stop laughing.
    I guess its all good for you, you got to bone her and didn't really have to deal with her being your GF/fuckbuddy for that long.

    pic related
    >> 083 !!I8ggLdPk6t6 07/14/11(Thu)23:46 No.15585023

    Not really, no.
    I mean, I was raised to be super-attached to it, what with coming from a Roman Catholic family, but it's not that big a deal to me.
    >> 083 !!I8ggLdPk6t6 07/14/11(Thu)23:49 No.15585045

    Glad I can bring some joy to my fellow fa/tg/uys.

    In this day and age? Most people aren't marrying as virgins, so I don't imagine it being that big a deal.
    >> BROther Laughing Man !!6Ltud83uedY 07/14/11(Thu)23:49 No.15585055
         File1310701775.jpg-(810 KB, 1952x1528, the greatest thing ever that w(...).jpg)
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    Consider your idea stolen.

    Have this, something that your idea is ALMOST as awesome as.
    >> AIDSwolf 07/14/11(Thu)23:50 No.15585060
    our only female player, my friends girlfriend, is a pretty awesome girl. she generally tends to play somewhat chaotic stupid characters, but I let it slide because she doesn't take it seriously, and she actually puts effort into roleplaying. no weird fetish fuel bullshit to speak of, though we're all gonna play a game of Maid RPG this sunday for funsies, and she's GMing. should be interesting.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)23:51 No.15585073
    it was a joke.

    But I do know a few gals who like virgins- something about wanting to feel special, remembered forever, blah blah blah.
    >> 083 !!I8ggLdPk6t6 07/14/11(Thu)23:52 No.15585085

    Heh, my bad. The sleep deprivation's taking a toll on my sense motive apparently.
    >> Anonymous 07/14/11(Thu)23:57 No.15585117
    I wish I knew a girl like that.

    Forever a /v/irgin

    Unrelated, should we archive this?
    >> 083 !!I8ggLdPk6t6 07/14/11(Thu)23:57 No.15585120

    I would be honored to have the tale of my lost virginity forever in the memory of /tg/.
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)00:06 No.15585190
    Roll a Mind Flayer
    if she tries to seduce you, tear off her head and plant a squid inside her
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)00:12 No.15585230

    Vote up the first one guys.
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)01:14 No.15585676
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    Now, everyone imagine 083 was a girl and the hambeast was a neckbeard.

    Suddenly the story is a thousand times more horrifying.
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)01:16 No.15585694
    You horrible person.

    Also 083 should have posted pictures of the hambeast so we could figure out what kind of horror he was facing.
    >> 083 !!I8ggLdPk6t6 07/15/11(Fri)01:23 No.15585747
    Yeah, suddenly it becomes something just awful instead of funny.

    You do tempt me, but I don't have any of her, since I formatted my hard drive.
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)01:27 No.15585772
    Not even a facebook? Speaking of which, whatever became of your group? Did you break it all up after that?

    >>My captcha is a fucking space invader.
    >> 083 !!I8ggLdPk6t6 07/15/11(Fri)01:37 No.15585849
    I suppose I could go gank one from her facebook.

    Still have a local group, definitely doesn't include either of them, though. We've got two weekly games, one on Sunday that I run and our Tuesday games only happen while school's in and we switch it up a lot with that.

    There, got one. No clue who the scrawny guy on the right is, though.
    >> 083 !!I8ggLdPk6t6 07/15/11(Fri)01:38 No.15585859
         File1310708297.jpg-(82 KB, 540x720, fortg.jpg)
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    Dammit, forgot hitting back after fucking up on the Captcha removes the file.
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)01:39 No.15585867
    By the Emperor...
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)01:40 No.15585880
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    >> nokosage Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)01:41 No.15585882

    We don't. I think /r9k/ just discovered /tg/ and that's the only reason we're having this thread in the format we are. Otherwise it'd just be a That Guy thread where some of the That Guys are That Girls.
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)01:44 No.15585909
    I disagree; we've always been ready to ditch whatever the fuck we were talking about when a good story comes up.
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)01:46 No.15585926

    /tg/ is more gay for stories than /lit/
    >> 083 !!I8ggLdPk6t6 07/15/11(Fri)01:46 No.15585931

    That's the essence of /tg/, actually. Threads rarely stay entirely on topic, but the discussion is always good, regardless of the tangent it's gone on.
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)01:47 No.15585939

    That's...true. I'm just saying, like, my groups have traditionally been mostly women and no such shenanigans have occurred. Although to be fair, I'm the only straight male in my current group and that's probably not common. Anyways, I don't think female players as a class are the problem.
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)01:48 No.15585946
    /tg/ - Gods of rule 26
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)01:49 No.15585951
    >> guy has a fucking spike through his face.
    >> girl has a nose ring the size of a bull's

    No wonder you were wat the entire way.
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)01:50 No.15585966
         File1310709032.jpg-(250 KB, 650x997, c24870dbbb6968a0a1a6d186d21653(...).jpg)
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    Semi-related: I wanna play a female character. Not because of anything fetishy or weird, but mostly just because it pisses me off that every guy I see play a chick turns her into Ball-Stomping Psychobitch or Slutty McFetishfuel. I wanna prove it can be done right.

    But how?
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)01:51 No.15585972

    Easy. Just add enough detail and complexity that she's neither a clear stereotype nor a clear subversion of one but a character in her own right.
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)01:52 No.15585980
    if you need to ask, you probably can't do it right
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)01:52 No.15585983
    >make a good male character
    >change the gender
    >you now have a good female character
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)01:53 No.15585994

    i thought it was two girls..
    >> dirigible 07/15/11(Fri)01:57 No.15586023
    Imperfect technique. Girls are different from guys.
    >> 15585972 07/15/11(Fri)01:57 No.15586029

    I think that's also an oversimplification. Gender is purely social, but there is some social reality to it. People expect certain things from men and certain things from women and will react differently to the same act depending on who's doing it, and that's going to have psychological ramifications for the character.
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)01:59 No.15586043
    same. Made it worse is the guy reminded me of a legitimately cute girl I used to have a crush on in college. There goes that crush.

    Also, chick looks hot, bro. I totally would have punched my v-card for some of that crazy.
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)01:59 No.15586044
    Sexist dribble who hold back the human race as a whole.
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)02:00 No.15586051
    >make a good male character
    >change the gender
    >you now have a good female character
    >a few sessions in the game your character is now being refereed to as he and him.
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)02:00 No.15586055
    >> 083 !!I8ggLdPk6t6 07/15/11(Fri)02:01 No.15586062

    Yeah, it's sort of understandable that I didn't just slap her away, right?
    >> 15585972 07/15/11(Fri)02:02 No.15586064

    Dude, I'd love it if it weren't the case, but our society is definitely structured with defined gender roles, and I think it's naive to pretend they don't affect the lives of any given character or person. No one's perfectly detached from them unless they're perfectly detached from said society. So yeah, if your character was raised by wolves and has no human contact, sure, you might have something. Otherwise, cultural norms are present for them that they're either abiding by, subverting or rejecting.
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)02:02 No.15586065
    I've had very positive experience and very neg experience.

    Had a player married to one of the players used to turn away from table and play solitaire unless her husband was gm. Recently got in the habit of telling everyone that they are bad GM's except her husband. Most of us think she is just a bad player.

    Had a discussion recently about how I was the worst GM, found it funny considering I've won awards for being a good GM (seriously who gives out awards for that). Last time I played with her she got upset because her action shooting the top officer of a military frigate on the command deck in space she thought she should have been able to get away without consequences. Thought it unreasonable that the frigate chased their ship and blasted them to bits. Did I mention the top officer was the king? and he was a good guy giving them a job
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)02:02 No.15586068
    It's true, bro.
    However, fantassy genres have been modern-ethics whitewashed so everyone is always equal horray and happiness for everybody. Otherwise, they're pretty much the same with a some societal expectations making specific changes.

    Until your woman PMSes or gets the baby alarm. Then they're legit crazy.
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)02:05 No.15586091
    I mean, she was OBVIOUSLY crazy, but I completely understand. I cant even remember how many times I put it in crazy...
    It's never worth it.
    >it's always worth it.
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)02:05 No.15586092
    Only played with two girls so far. First just didn't know anything about the game, never did anything except "ok, i agree with that guy, let's do his suggestion"

    Second was a hambeast playing an elven ranger and had to specify that every attack was aimed at the enemy's ass. She could not get enough of shooting arrows at/into peoples ass.
    >> dirigible 07/15/11(Fri)02:06 No.15586095
    >Gender is purely social, but there is some social reality to it
    >psychological ramifications
    just shhhhh

    It doesn't matter why. Girls act different from guys. You can't just put tits on a dude and pretend it's a girl.
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)02:08 No.15586106

    I'm surprised you held out for 5 months!
    >> 083 !!I8ggLdPk6t6 07/15/11(Fri)02:09 No.15586112

    Must have good will progression, eh?
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)02:10 No.15586116

    You know that explains why whenever I see a gaggle of neckbeards there is only one hambeast, and whenever these gaggles meet the hambeast eye each other off.
    >> Braith117 07/15/11(Fri)02:11 No.15586120
    Not that there aren't a few guys that try.
    >> 15585972 07/15/11(Fri)02:11 No.15586128

    >It doesn't matter why

    Sure it does. I don't buy the gender essentialist argument, I really don't. There are way too many people who don't fit in neat little categories. But if these differences we see in behavior aren't biological, they need to come from somewhere, and culture is both an obvious and a well-documented and studied source.
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)02:12 No.15586135
    Hey, OP, make a character so stupid that he doesn't understand her advances.
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)02:15 No.15586155

    Maybe bonuses from your successful casting of Detect Crazy?
    >> 083 !!I8ggLdPk6t6 07/15/11(Fri)02:17 No.15586170
    Might have been.
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)02:18 No.15586172
    Yeah but if you had held out the whole time I would have been amazed. I mean all I did was push off the advances of that crazy religious Girl#2 when I was 16.

    But damn man she gave you everything and you held. I think I could have done better. But damn you are much stronger than a normal man.
    >> dirigible 07/15/11(Fri)02:20 No.15586185
    If you don't have data then there's no point navel-gazing.

    Post sauce to a study of boys and girls raised in a culture-less environment.

    Unless that study exists we might as well assume that girls are inherently different from boys. And honestly is that so hard to believe?
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)02:21 No.15586197
         File1310710910.jpg-(148 KB, 720x540, Amazon_Women_in_the_Mood.jpg)
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    Had a girl join after we just started a campaign.
    I had made a halfling bard that went around hitting on things in a very bardly manner.
    Well when the girl joined she made a half-orc barbarian.
    I had yet to let a party member go unsmoozed and I wasn't starting now.
    "Hey tall, green and mean wanna learn how to pluck my strings"
    *strum lute*
    She replies with with her orc being uninterested in me.
    So I roll my perform and tell a warstory and buy her a drink.
    Huge success and she lets me know that her orc is warming up to me.
    Well I never go anywhere with my flirts its just me putting in my required bard hours so I simple invite her to go adventuring with us.
    Well she says "Hahahahaha nope you're not getting off that easy"
    Me "what..."
    Her "You have a lich to fight in MY dungeon little man"
    Me "oh god"
    So she grapples me and carries me up the inns stairs and when I scream for help from the party they all just have their characters raise a mug and give me a cheer.
    So we fade to black and she gets introduced to the party the next day when the parties cleric had to heal some bludgeoning damage.
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)02:22 No.15586199
    We have one girl in our group, but she's a total bro. Every so often she'll get a little carried away with her homo fetish (trying like hell to get the male characters to fuck) but we give her "the look" and she knocks it off. But otherwise, she's awesome.
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)02:23 No.15586213
    That's actually hilarious.
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)02:24 No.15586222
    Some screencap this for me please.

    That is funny.
    >> dirigible 07/15/11(Fri)02:24 No.15586224
    >she wants to fuck
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)02:26 No.15586237
    I want to meet this woman and shake her hand.
    >and maybe go out for a beer afterward
    >> 083 !!I8ggLdPk6t6 07/15/11(Fri)02:29 No.15586262

    Now, that's just classy.
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)02:32 No.15586310
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    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)02:34 No.15586336
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    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)02:35 No.15586339
    She is a totally bro too bad she got married and has kids now.
    Great little buggers but she never has any freetime to play anymore.
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)02:54 No.15586496
    >Bored out of my mind during a free period in sixth form (Like college, built into high school, in case it's just a british thing)
    >For some reason I had a little battletech stuff on me
    >Whammy, atlas, Bushwacker
    >Start playing for shits and giggles with this one bro, just doing stupid shit (pilot skill 8 for each of us, tripping over twigs)
    >This girl's been watching for a while
    >Not amazingly attractive, but pleasant enough
    >Loves maths
    >Asks what we're doing, and that it looks pretty weird
    >Ask if she wants to play
    >She loves it

    Went pretty well, really. Brought in some clan mechs some time (never bothered bringing point costs into any of these games, just for fun)
    Skirmishing everywhere, we can't hit shit.
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)03:06 No.15586605

    Now lest swap the sexes over.
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)03:12 No.15586671
    I've only played with a few women in my gaming career. One was a player's GF that he dragged along for the ride. She was never very interested and was mainly ended up being a big distraction until she'd finally get her BF to take her home, at which point we'd actually start playing seriously.

    Another was an obnoxious hambeast who was also a player's GF. She only ever played elven rogues and always tried to hide her dice rolls and expect us to believe she never rolled lower than a 16.

    Next three I played with in college. One was a soft spoken timid player who mostly just went along with whatever else was going on and didn't contribute much overall.

    Second female was a hambeast who though she was the funniest shit ever because she made stupid internet meme jokes all the time. Sucked at RPing and only ever played characters who existed only to fight.

    Third was a damn good RPer. She played a variety of different types of characters rather than just sticking to one like the others and always had a well though out concept and played it well. She wasn't bad looking either and about 2 months after we started gaming together we started dating and eventually had sex. Good times. We both agreed not to let our relationship affect the game, so whenever it was gaming night we'd game as usual with the rest of the group then go back to her place and get it on. Sadly our relationship didn't last long, she graduated and moved back home. We still talk all the time over skype and stuff though.
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)03:12 No.15586675
    I always find the best art on /tg/.
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)03:44 No.15586906
    > Got into M;tG recently
    > Playing against friend
    > Girlfriend comes over
    > She watches us play for a while
    > Asks if she could try
    > Two weeks later she's rolling a Black White deck none of my friends can beat.

    inb4 >girlfriend
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)03:48 No.15586932
    I used to play with a gamer girl. She was on the fat side, not easy to look at, and her eyes pointed in two different directions. She was legally blind.

    She acted like a goddamn slut all the time, which was more repulsive than anything. We finally kicked her out when she - in the same session - yelled "FUCK" loudly enough for everyone in the library to hear, and then pitched a fit when the encounter didn't go her way.

    She was sapping the fun out of everything, and so we got together and told the DM privately, it's us or her.

    Been playing together and having a great time for a little over a year since.
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)04:15 No.15587078
    One of the girls in my campaign (there are three) plays the upstart noble, straight paladin levels, routing the corrupt in her nation one motherfucker at a time because BY MY HONOR I SHALL NOT YIELD TO THEE

    The second is a cleric of a trickster god, but none of that lol chaotic randum bullshit. She's playing it straight up Gwydion fab Dôn, motherfucker, and has half the party believing she's a fucking god in mortal guise.

    But the third. BEST. And do you know why? Fuck no, you don't. You can't know something this beautiful.
    Her character is a tribute to Kromgol.
    >> anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)06:47 No.15588022
    I know these two women who are professional actors, I wish I could get em to RP with us. Bet it would be EPIC.

    But since they get paid for that they are just not into the idea.
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)06:51 No.15588053
    Played with several girls.
    1) Somewhat attractive girl. Plays WH40k, paints models really well. Rather shy and withdrawn, plays quiet Adept.
    2) Young and fiery girl. GF of one of my best friends. Excellent roleplayer, usually plays charismatic elven sorcerers. IRL Looks very close to DnD elves. Loves LARPs, decently fights with light swords and knives. I know her since she was 12. Used to be a real slut when she was 14-15, almost everyone banged her, including me and my friends.
    3) Young girl, student of GM's best friend, who is a high-school teacher. Anime fan, loves hentai and yaoi, plays male characters. Still learns to roleplay properly. Once raped two 10-11 year old girls in underhive while playing DH. Other players were rather amused by it.
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)07:09 No.15588149
    Pic related?

    >gets raped by her guardian/case worker
    >records it
    >Schemes to poison him, with a lethal dose of nicotine, so it would be nigh undetectable
    >rapes him right back instead
    >tattoos humiliating stuff on his stomach
    >blackmails him with the recording
    >Pro Hacker
    >Hacker contacts
    >rides a motorcycle
    >fights off drunken thugs at the train station, outnumbered 5-6 to 1.
    >can also fight/brawl/kick-box quite well.
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)07:12 No.15588168
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    Derp derp derp....forgot mah pic...
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)07:13 No.15588173
    Your whole group sounds like That Guy's.
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)07:23 No.15588212
    No at all. It's fun for everyone, no party backstabbing and in-fighting. We've had our share of disruptive That Guys, so we no longer play with them and do not act like them. And all of girls were in different parties.
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)07:25 No.15588232
    I'm sure YOUR games run well, but my point is if you split up, I get the feeling you'd be Those Guys.
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)07:33 No.15588271
    What makes you think like that?
    I don't really get it.
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)07:37 No.15588291
    I was once playing with a bunch of guys who freaked out when I told them I wasn't into sex.

    Oh, sorry, you mean ABOUT girls.
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)07:38 No.15588297
    Well you have a teacher socializing with a student outside of school, which is a no go. This i and of itself isn't so bad as much as that the guy would risk his career to do it. Weird. Also, the fact that your group as a whole finds rape of 10-11 year old girls as amusing. If you want to incorporate that in your game fine, but my issue is that you find it funny. I wish you enjoyment in your game, though.
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)07:47 No.15588343
    my god. she's an IRL PC.
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)07:49 No.15588353
    OP, please use this one I BEG YOU!
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)07:50 No.15588358
    I don't get it.
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)07:56 No.15588394
         File1310730996.jpg-(22 KB, 377x299, 404 girl is confused.jpg)
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    >raises hand
    What is Rule 26?
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)07:57 No.15588400
    Nah dude, she's a character, in a series of books.

    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)07:59 No.15588415
    Using my intuition, I would guess that rule 26 is the tendency for a thread to devolve into completely unrelated discussions. But if you want to know, google "Rules of 4chan".
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)08:00 No.15588421
    Rules of the Internet*. My mistake, been a while since I've thought about it.
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)08:05 No.15588450
    He doesn't risk his career. We do not live in America or Western Europe, so nobody gives a shit. And he is just some 8 years older, and still has to graduate from university.
    We do not intentionally incorporate rape and sexual content in our games, but if somebody wants it - he'll get it. With a fade to black, of course. But nobody except this girl was interested in this before, so far. And it was rather in-character, as she randomly rolled a 16 year old underhive scum. When you are 16, you tend to be rather horny, and if you grown up in underhive, violence would be normal for you.
    Our group is very jaded IRL. So no one was grossed out by it. And it's a game, why should we take fictional violence and rapes seriously? Hell, in one of our RT games our rather heretical Explorator offered to create a literal Nazi-style death camp for some "unwanted people". And was able to find a way of getting profit from it. IC, we had a long discussion with him. OOC we laughed and congratulated him for an excellent idea. So he proceeded, and managed to get us +1 profit factor by killing and processing about half a million people.
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)08:07 No.15588459
    I'm glad you enjoy it. You just give me the impression of a bunch of edgy, teenage try-hards. It's just my opinion though, so don't take it to heart.
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)08:14 No.15588485

    I knew about the rules of the internet but I thought it might have been a /tg/ thing that I wasn't familiar with. Thanks anyway.

    >26. Any topic can be turned into something totally unrelated.
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)08:22 No.15588523
    No offense taken.
    The only teenage person in our groups is that girl. Others are 23-28 years old with jobs and girlfriends.
    >> Anonymous 07/15/11(Fri)11:22 No.15589679
    >IRL Looks very close to DnD elves
    C'mon, you can't say this and expect us not to want a pic...

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