rolled 3, 5 = 8

Axebeard Harrison

rolled 12, 6 = 18

Sterling Dicknose

Thron Arskicker

>>15524738
YOU ARE AN INTELLECTUAL WASTELAND

rolled 12, 10 = 22

>>15524738

rolled 10, 3 = 13

>>15524738
How the fuck do you motherfuckers not know how to do this after reading the sticky?

Ragelord Angryfuck. Because that makes me a little annoyed.

rolled 5, 10 = 15

Bob Johnson

rolled 12, 7 = 19

>>15524743
Oh, he won too. That's just lovely.

>>15524743
GOT LUCKY.

THRON ARSKICKER THE ADVENTURER IT IS, BORN TO JIM ARSKICKER AND FLO ARSKICKER.

WE NEED TO KNOW THRON'S GENDER AND RACE, SO THE NECKBEARDS CAN GET THEIR DROW TO FAP TO. LET'S GO, BROS

rolled 8, 9 = 17

>>15524765
female dwarf
get your cocks ready

rolled 9, 9 = 18

>>15524765
male, semnurv

rolled 6, 4 = 10

Sergal.

rolled 6, 6 = 12

>>15524765
Male. Kender.

rolled 9, 2 = 11

Awakened Gelatinous Cube

rolled 7, 9 = 16

>>15524765

male, half-orc

rolled 6, 3 = 9

Male Balor

rolled 12, 2 = 14

male, awakened octopus

rolled 3, 3 = 6

Male, Elf.

YOUR ROLLS ALL SUCK
YOUR HP IS IN THE SHITTER FOR A BARBARIAN

rolled 6, 3 = 9

>>15524765

Male Balor

rolled 3, 10 = 13

Male, Kobold.

rolled 11, 11 = 22

>>15524765
Female Minotaur
Feeling... horny?

rolled 10, 1 = 11

A male kobold, archer

>>15524816

rolled 2, 7 = 9

female, mind flayer

rolled 8, 10 = 18

I'm anticipating that the next step is class.

Bard.

>>15524816
THRON ARSKICKER, MINOTAUR ADVENTURER!
THRON LEFT THE LABYRINTH TO SEEK A LIFE OF THRILLS, NOT CONTENT WITH THE OCCASIONAL PC TO SLAUGHTER.

LET'S SEE WHAT SHE ENDED UP AS. GET A CLASS UP IN HERE.

rolled 1, 11 = 12

>>15524837
Wu Jen.

rolled 1, 5 = 6

>>15524837
favored soul

rolled 7, 11 = 18

>>15524837
Bard. Plays something silly, like awakened bagpipes.

>>15524837
FUCK, NOT USED TO THIS SHIT
FINE, HERE

http://www.dndsheets.net/view.php?id=20338

rolled 10, 5 = 15

>>15524837
Shugenja.

rolled 9, 11 = 20

warlock

rolled 11, 3 = 14

BARD!!!
> inb4 getting laid

rolled 7, 11 = 18

>>15524837
Bard.

And because this guy is a genius:
>>15524842
She plays awakened bagpipes.

>>15524852
SOOOO CLOSE

rolled 11, 8 = 19

>>15524842
>>15524855
Oh god! And she wears a kilt and has a thick scottish accent!

WHAT THEY SAID!

rolled 11, 11 = 22

Priestess (something holy)

rolled 8, 11 = 19

Bard. To Temptress.
Screw song, we use dance.

rolled 8, 11 = 19

>>15524863
>>15524855
>>15524842
>Rolling like a pussy

It's like you've never randomly generated a kilt wearing, animated-bagpipe playing, bard minotaur before.

HERE'S how you do it.

>>15524867
HAHAH OH WOW
LOOKS LIKE WE'RE GOING CLERIC TO UR-PRIEST

>>15524878
>MFW no animated-bagpipe-playing, kilt-wearing, female minotaur bards.

rolled 12, 6 = 18

>>15524878
Cleric of some God of Music, at least?
Eventually Ur-Priest into getting power from the Song of Creation itself?

>>15524878
NEVERMIND THAT'S STUPID, I'M DISQUALIFYING THE ROLL. KEEP ROLLING, MAYBE YOU'LL GET YOUR BARD

rolled 9, 6 = 15

>>15524893
BARDBARDBARDBARD

rolled 9, 12 = 21

BARD !!!!

rolled 3, 4 = 7

>>15524893
Animated-bagpipe-playing
Kilt-wearing
Motherfuckin'
FEMALE
MINOTAUR
BARD

>>15524898
YOU, SIR!

YES YOU!

WE PRAISE YOU!

>>15524898
DING DING DING, LOOKS LIKE WE'VE GOT A WINNER

THRON ARSKICKER, FAMOUS MINOTAUR BARD WITH HER LIVING BAGPIPES. NO ONE UNDERSTANDS THE FUCK SHE'S SAYS, SHE'S A COW WITH A SCOTTISH ACCENT.

BUT WHAT WILL THIS COW DO TO AN ADVENTURER ON THE ROAD? ROLL FOR ALIGNMENT AND I GUESS DEITY, WHO GIVES A SHIT

rolled 12, 9 = 21

>>15524898
Max ranks in Perform (Water-Pipe)
Screw your bagpipes, we're going musical hookah.

rolled 5, 11 = 16

>>15524915
Neutral Good, whereas good is defined as giving out free hugs and musical performances.

Illmater.

>>15524920
SHIT BRO, CAN'T DENY THAT SEXY ROLL.
THE AWAKENED BAGPIPES ARE ALSO A HOOKAH.

rolled 10, 1 = 11

>>15524915
CHAOTIC GOOD

A GOD SHE MADE UP - PATRON OF BAGPIPES AND HAGGIS.

rolled 5, 11 = 16

>>15524915
Chaotic Good!

rolled 1, 12 = 13

>>15524915
This!

rolled 6, 4 = 10

>>15524915
Lawful Neutral.

Pelor the Burning Hate.

rolled 10, 6 = 16

Hoots'mon, patron deity of bagpipehookahs and tartan patterns.

rolled 4, 2 = 6

lawful good
princess celestia from my little pony

rolled 3, 2 = 5

She worships the King in Tartan.

rolled 4, 5 = 9

>>15524915
CN
AND UH...
KORD.
GET IT?
CAUSE SHE'S LIKE A BARD AND STUFF.

rolled 1, 9 = 10

Chaotic good, Mystra

rolled 10, 9 = 19

Chaotic good.. deities?? PFFt WE ARE A GOD!!

IT'S LIKE YOU'VE NEVER EVEN SEEN A GREAT AXE BEFORE WITH THOSE ROLLS

rolled 11, 10 = 21

>>15524966
Oh man, I really like this idea, let's go with it.

rolled 12, 5 = 17

Chaotic Neutral.
She believes she is a god- anyone who denies this is deafened by her divine song; right in their ear.

rolled 6, 7 = 13

>>15524915
Chaotic Neutral. And, just for shits and giggles, Honor Rank 2 from the Rokugan tie-in from third.

Deity is Bushido.

>>15524985
HASTUR BE PRAISED

SHE STILL NEEDS AN ALIGNMENT THOUGH

rolled 2, 11 = 13

LG.
Fuck alignment restrictions. Or if you enforce them, NG.

rolled 11, 5 = 16

>>15524992
Lawful Stupid.

rolled 12, 10 = 22

>>15524992
CG.

rolled 1, 9 = 10

>>15524992
CHAOTIC EVIL!
PLAY SHE SCREECHING SONG THAT WILL BRING THE END TIMES

rolled 11, 1 = 12

>>15524992
Chaotic Lovecraftian.
Also known as "She is green."

>>15524997
ALIGNMENT RESTRICTIONS ARE FOR PUSSIES WHO HAVE NEVER LEFT THE FUCKING PANTY-KNOT THEY FOUND THEMSELVES IN

LET'S GO, WHATEVER THE FUCK THE ROLLS WANT IS WHAT WE TAKE

rolled 6, 12 = 18

Lawful Evil.

rolled 2, 5 = 7

Chaotic Vixen ... makes all her actions sexual

rolled 9, 8 = 17

>>15525004
Rats. LE diabolist Bard would have been so much more interesting.

>>15525004
SHIIIIIT, RIGHT UNDER MY NOSE

THRON ARSKICKER IS A CHAMPION OF JUSTICE, BUT NOT FOR YOUR MAINSTREAM KIND OF JUSTICE
IT'S AN OBSCURE CONCEPT, YOU WOULDN'T HAVE HEARD OF IT

BUT NOW WE SHOULD SEE IF SHE'S COMPETENT, SO LET'S GET THE BORING SHIT OUT OF THE WAY AS FAST AS POSSIBLE; ROLLING HER STATS. IN ORDER, BECAUSE WE'RE FUCKING IRON MAN HERE

NEXT SIX GUYS, ROLL 3d6, AND WE TAKE THOSE

rolled 5, 4, 4 = 13

>>15525029

rolled 6, 2, 2 = 10

>>15525029
Rollin for it!

rolled 2, 1, 6 = 9

>>15525029
Rollan

rolled 6, 5, 2, 3 = 16

>>15525029

rolled 1, 6, 6 = 13

Rollan

rolled 2, 3, 5 = 10

lets do it

>>15525029
>>15525037
>>15525040
>>15525044
>>15525046
>>15525048
>>15525050

Oh god, poor thing.

rolled 3, 5, 3 = 11

rolling

rolled 4, 4 = 8

>>15525046
Nice 3d6 there, mr. accountant.

MINOTAURS GOT STAT BONUSES, SO LET'S SEE HERE
21 STRENGTH
10 DEXTERITY
13 CONSTITUTION
12 INTELLIGENCE
13 WISDOM
8 CHARISMA

THRON IS FUCKING WORTHLESS
OH WELL, SHE CAN STILL SLAP YOUR SHIT IF YOU'RE A DUMBASS

NOW WHAT DOES SHE DO IF SHE GETS IN A FIGHT, HEY
DOES SHE JUST PUNCH DUDES? OR DOES SHE SMACK THEM AROUND WITH A HAMMER

OR MAYBE SHE FLOGS THEIR ASS WITH A SPIKED CHAIN

OR WITH A GUITAR. FUCK DND WEAPONS.
ROLL FOR HER WEAPON, WHICH CAN BE FUCKING ANYTHING, I DON'T CARE

rolled 3, 6, 3 = 12

>>15525066
And of course captcha resets me to 2d12 and makes me look like an asshole. Fuck.

SHHHII... look at them rolls... she be wimpy as fuck..

rolled 2, 9 = 11

>>15525068
Sickle

rolled 4, 7 = 11

>>15525068
The King in Tartan

rolled 2, 12 = 14

>>15525068
A magically preserved raptor corpse.

rolled 3, 9 = 12

>>15525068

A giant candy cane.

rolled 4, 3 = 7

>>15525068
A fucking battleaxe that's enchanted with +1 to all Tartan-related activities.

rolled 9, 3 = 12

>>15525068
A GREATAXE THAT'S ALSO A GUITAHHH

>>15525068
Awakened bagpipes.

rolled 4, 3 = 7

She wields a gnome in her right hand and the Bagpipes of her foremothers in her left. Either one is viable as the Bagpipes are magical and therefore resistant to being broken and the gnome in a funny little thing when it squeals

KNIGHTS DON'T KNOW WHAT THE FUCK WITH THOSE ROLLS

AND I'M RUNNING OUT OF d12 JOKES, SO STOP BEING WORTHLESS YOU FUCKHEADS

rolled 6, 7 = 13

>>15525068
She fights with drum sticks, she plays the skulls of her enemies

rolled 10, 10 = 20

>>15525105
Motherfucking CAPTCHA, actually rolling this time.

rolled 4, 12 = 16

She basicly screams (sings) them into a coma!

rolled 11, 1 = 12

heavy bolter

>>15525115
TOUGH SHIT BRO, NOT HIGH ENOUGH

rolled 4, 3 = 7

>>15525105
She blows her smoke in their faces as a weapon

rolled 6, 6 = 12

A hive of infinite bees tied to a sturdy stick.

rolled 7, 6 = 13

Captured English kings.

rolled 7, 6 = 13

>>15525126
BAGPIPE SMOKE GAS

rolled 5, 9 = 14

>>15525104
Supporting.... HNNNGHH

rolled 1, 1 = 2

Cotton candy.

rolled 5, 4 = 9

Picture related.

rolled 9, 7 = 16

Her bare goddamn hands.

rolled 12, 11 = 23

>>15525129
>>15525134
OH GOD! HER BAGPIPES CONTAIN A HIVE, AND THEY'RE AL PISSED OFF BY THE SMOKE. SHE FIGHTS WITH BEE-SMOKE

rolled 3, 7 = 10

She wields a giant bell
A giant cow bell

rolled 5, 8 = 13

case of pabst blue ribbon

>>15525139
CRITICAL FAILURE! COTTON CANDY IS SO REVOLTING, SO UTTERLY DESPICABLE SHE FLIES INTO A RAGE IF SHE SO MUCH HEARS THE PHRASE UTTERED

YOOOOOOU DID THIS, AND REMOVED ANY SEMBLANCE OF A CHILDHOOD SHE MIGHT HAVE HAD

I HOPE YOU'RE PROUD OF YOURSELF

rolled 2, 10 = 12

> looks at rolls
We never getting a bard with a cool weapon
.. Rolling for a Battle axe that gives out a tone when swinging it
Also it has a vibrator button

rolled 5, 8 = 13

>>15525161
Never heard of Reginald?

rolled 7, 8 = 15

A live shark she swings by the tail.

>>15525165
>looks at her stats..
I dont think it would be wise..

>>15525146
THIS ON THE OTHER HAND IS AMAZING
THE AWAKENED BAGPIPES ARE ALSO A BEE HIVE AND SHE SHOOTS ANGRY BEES.

THE BEE-SMOKE BASHER, SHE IS, A MINOTAUR OF GREAT REKNOWN

BUT LET'S SEE -HOW- REKNOWN.

MAY AS WELL ASK HOW MUCH OF A BADASS SHE IS, WE'RE PRETTY MUCH DONE HERE

WHAT LEVEL IS THRON, AND HOW ACCOMPLISHED AN ADVENTURER?

rolled 12, 5 = 17

>>15525178
Level 3
She has quite a ... BUZZ surrounding her

rolled 1, 9 = 10

>>15525178
Let's say 7. A nice solid type of level.

Wait, is this character levels or total level after LA and HD?

rolled 3, 12 = 15

>>15525178
lvl 7, she has a follower who is (also) a bard!

also, took a feat to have a familiar. Her familiar is a giant fiendish bee

>>15525194
NO ONE GIVES A FUCK ABOUT HIT DICE

rolled 11, 3 = 14

>>15525195
REROLLING LIKE A MOTHAFUCKA

She has a town named after her.
SHE FORCED THEM TO BY TORTURING THEM WITH HER BEES.
They hate her there.
If a town has medium to high pop, they love her.
Low pop, they love her FOLLOWER

rolled 10, 6 = 16

Level 4, she got so weak stats its revolting..

rolled 7, 3 = 10

>>15525203
FUUU

last re roll.

>My body is ready

rolled 2, 6 = 8

I drew the King in Tartan.

rolled 2, 8 = 10

She's level 2
She likes to moo
She's kinda new

>>15525221
YOU ARE A BEAUTIFUL HUMAN BEING

rolled 4, 7 = 11

>>15525178

9001

rolled 3, 8 = 11

Level 4
Open the door
Get on the floor
Everyone dance the minotaur

rolled 11, 12 = 23

She has no level

>>15525228
seconded.

rolled 10, 3 = 13

>>15525204
reroll

>>15525247

>>15525247
SHIIIIIT, WE'RE GETTING INTO SOMETHING HERE
SHE'S A BARD, AND YET ISN'T

GUESS SHE'S JUST A MINOTAUR WHO FANCIES HERSELF A BARD

WELP, MAKES AS MUCH SENSE AS ANYTHING
HAHAH NO THIS IS STUPID, KEEP ROLLING

rolled 8, 3 = 11

Level π (pi)

rolled 3, 7 = 10

LEVEL fucking 1

>>15525279
I SEE NO BAGPIPES-HOOKAH-BEEHIVE IN THIS PICTURE

WHAT ARE YOU DOING, IT DOES NOT GO THERE

rolled 5, 5 = 10

Level 1. That's why she's shit- because she has room yet to improve.

I mean duh.

rolled 4, 11 = 15

She is an NPC, her level is irrelevant. She is worth 777 XP

rolled 3, 1 = 4

She is a level 20 natural hazard.

rolled 6, 7 = 13

As of yet, she is level 1...

BUT SHE ABSORBS THE ATTRIBUTE POINTS OF THOSE WHO SUCCUMB TO HER SONG.

rolled 10, 1 = 11

She can stretch her level out to 200 gum-gums

rolled 6, 7 = 13

She'll evolve into miltank at level 6

rolled 5, 4 = 9

She is level 1, but she has genitalia six levels higher than her at any given point.

IF YOU ALL WERE A TON OF DRAGONS YOU WOULD BE THE MOST WORTHLESS

rolled 1, 5 = 6

>>15525328
I make that seven levels higher.

rolled 1, 8 = 9

level 1

rolled 4, 8 = 12

>>15525328
>>15525331
It is settled, then. She is level one- and at any given point, has genitalia ten levels higher than her.

rolled 4, 4 = 8

>>15525330
The dice gods say she is level null

rolled 5, 5 = 10

>>15525342
My theory was wrong

rolled 1, 7 = 8

>>15525341
Seconding this

rolled 8, 2 = 10

Oh for craps sake guys get serious

also lvl 3

rolled 6, 8 = 14

>>15525269
Level 10

rolled 5, 7 = 12

>>15525341
No. Level 1, with genitalia 11 levels above her at any given time.

It's like you've never had player-independent genitalia progression before.

FUCK IT I'LL ROLL FOR IT, LET'S SEE

>>15525354
HAHAH WOW I DERP'D PRETTY HARD

rolled 7, 10 = 17

>>15525353
Make that fifteen levels higher.

Rolling.

rolled 2, 5 = 7

>>15525354
OH GOD THIS IS EMBARRASSING

rolled 4, 9 = 13

>>15525361
LEVEL 1, GENITALS 20 LEVELS HIGHER THAN HER.

rolled 2, 3 = 5

>>15525361
This is actually a funny idea.
17 levels higher.

rolled 4, 5 = 9

>>15525372
What does that even mean?

Also, thirty levels higher.

rolled 5, 11 = 16

>>15525372
>>15525374
>>15525379
You are all SMALL TIME.

FORTY LEVELS HIGHER.

rolled 2, 3 = 5

75 LEVELS HIGHER!

rolled 5, 1 = 6

Level F00D

rolled 5, 10 = 15

>>15525383
FIFTY LEVELS HIGHER

>>15525366
NOW THAT I'VE STOP BEING AN INCREDIBLE DERP, IT WOULD SEEM THAT THRON IS OF LEVEL 7

HOWEVER, HER GENATALIA ARE LEVEL 17. FURRIES BEWARE, FOR THEY'RE TEMPLATED WITH HALF-VAMPIRE

NOW THAT THRON IS AN ESTABLISHED ADVENTURER, SHE WILL NEED COMPANIONS
WHO DOES SHE TRAVEL WITH? FIRST THREE OVER 15 WINS; NAME, RACE, AND CLASS REQUIRED

rolled 3, 9 = 12

Level 5
She speaks jive.

rolled 3, 5 = 8

Jesus christ, and we were doing so well before the furry shit showed up.

Make her level 14.

rolled 7, 2 = 9

LEVEL OOOONE

GENITALS ONE HUNDRED LEVELS HIIIIIGHEEEEEER!

rolled 1, 12 = 13

>>15525393
A tap-dancing turtle named Fredrico del sol de ajuste

rolled 4, 3 = 7

>>15525393
Slab Maniron, half-golem wizard

rolled 2, 4 = 6

>>15525393
Grag Rilp.
Kobold chef.

rolled 6, 1 = 7

>>15525393
Buzz't
Drow Priest of Swarmae (the goddess of Bees and Vengeance)

rolled 9, 10 = 19

>>15525408
Fredrico is a wizard btw

rolled 3, 7 = 10

Compiled from the lowest rolls in all non-stat categories

Axebeard Harrison
Male Elf
Favored Soul
Worships King in Tartan
Chaotic Vixen
Wields Cotton Candy
Lvl 20 Natural Hazard

rolled 2, 8 = 10

Kirk Hirtil
Kobold Bicycle-Repairman

rolled 5, 7 = 12

She is level 10 and about to take SUBLIME CHORD.

>>15525417
AVERAGE OF 19 AND 13 IS 16
YOU GOT LUCKY, BUB

ON HER TRAVELS SHE MET WITH THE DANCING TURTLE WIZARD, FREDERICO DEL SOL DE AJUSTE, WHO WON HER FRIENDSHIP WITH HIS INCREDIBLY SEXY ACCENT

rolled 7, 10 = 17

>>15525419

I'll take just 1 reroll, dammit.

rolled 12, 2 = 14

3 is a nice start level

rolled 3, 1 = 4

Lance Gently
Halfling
Paladin

rolled 12, 10 = 22

Hanz Jertik
Kobold Bus-Conductor

rolled 11, 6 = 17

Omnesein, Cleric lvl 10 Ur priest level 10, race Thrii-keen

>>15525441
SHIT, WHERE WERE YOU WHEN WE WERE DECIDING LEVELS
ALSO ACCOMPANYING IS HANZ JERTIK, THE KOBOLD BUS-CONDUCTOR. HIS DRIVING SKILLS ARE LEGENDARY AMONG THE RANKS OF THE PUBLIC TRANSPORTATION GUILD.

>>15525441
>Kobold Bus-Conductor

rolled 2, 3 = 5

>>15525436
I'll reroll that.

add worships a bowl of fruit in King in Tartan
Armor does not include footwear
and is fat as fuck hobbit style

>>15525442
>>15525433
which one counts?

>Kobold Bus-Conductor

rolled 4, 12 = 16

Snortflod Bigglefart
Deep Gnome Tour Guide

>>15525442
FINAL PARTY MEMBER IS OMNESEIN, AN INCREDIBLY POWERFUL THRI-KREEN UR-PRIEST.

HE'S A LITTLE UPPITY SOMETIMES, BUT ON THE WHOLE PRETTY CHILL.

AND SO THRON ARSKICKER HAS BEEN FULLY REALIZED; HER HP IS ROLLED IN THIS POST HERE.

WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU ALL, NOW I HAVE TO DRAW A MINOTAUR SMOKING/PLAYING A BAGPIPES-HOOKAH-BEEHIVE

this is for you gais

rolled 1, 6, 6, 3, 1, 3 + 13 = 33

>>15525480
I AM AN IMMORTAL DERP

>>15525482
dammit missed the bees, sorry

>>15525480
I drew King in Tartan. You can deal with the Female Bard Minotaur who wears a kilt and uses an animated bagpike-hookah-beehive which fires smoke who travels with a Kobold bus-conductor, a Thri-Kreen Ur-Preist and a dancing turtle wizard.

>>15525496
WHY COULDN'T THIS WHOLE THING BEEN ABOUT THE KOBOLD BUS-CONDUCTOR

EVERYONE KNOWS HE'S THE STAR OF THIS SHOW

/thread

>>15525482
where is the beehive? not ridiculous enough

Slime Genasi (demi-elemental)
Female
Bard (Lute)

Water Genasi
Female
Bard (Lyre)

Steam Genasi (demi-elemental)
Female
Bard (Song. Voice like silk.)

>>15525587

DRAWING THIS SHIT NOW
IF THE THREAD DIES, I'LL POST IT LATER
FUCKING
SHITCOCKS OR SOMETHING
I DON'T KNOW LEAVE ME ALONE

rum-da-dum

updating with bees

>>15525698
Needs more Kilt. And hybridise those bagpipes with a hookah.

Confound you /tg/, you drive me to drink.

>>15525889
BEEEEEEEEEES

>>15525889
SHIT, DO I EVEN NEED TO DO IT NOW
THIS IS PRETTY GREAT

>>15525889
Stupid opacity

>>15525910
Derp forgot pic

>>15525889
Bagpipe needs googly eyes to show its awakened.

rolled 2, 7 = 9

>>15525889
Now thats what we are talking about!!! Good job!
> minutaur girl Check
> bagpipe with hookah and a beehive Check
> a kilt Check
> Fucking freeroaming bees Check
.... freaking awesome dude

>>15525918
Her-a-derp googly eyes

>>15525981
ffs why do i always forget the pic

>>15525986
Well I know what I'm gonna be playing for my next campaign.

>>15525587
>>15525482
>>15525279
All obviously tieflings

>>15525986
Oh you sly bastard.

>>15526034
Why yes, yes i am derpy.

rolled 8, 9 = 17

What now??

>>15526065
Idk you tell me.
Need anything else?
(Not gonna do the sidekicks btw)

OP promised his version of this PC, so, where is it?

>>15525907
Yes. You do. Because this mino is lacking a bulls head. It does infact have a human head. A human body with a human head does not a mino make.

>>15526128
SCANNING IT NOW
KEEP YOUR HANDS OUT OF YOUR PANTS

>>15526189
You're not the boss of me.

>>15526189
I promise nothing.

>>15526200
And you're not so big.

Ok gais i couldn't help myself but making one of the sidekicks for shits 'n' giggles (and because he was easy) sorry for being dishonest in >>15526073

THERE
WAS TOO LAZY TO CLEAN IT UP AND SHIT
BUT IT'S DONE ANYWAY

>>15526216
Y you become liar... oh well, sweet turtle wizard..

>>15526224
I approve

>>15526224
OP, you are the best OP.

>>15526224
Close enough. Good job OP, you delivered. What now?

>>15526246
SHIT, HAVE A FUCKING PARTY OR SOMETHING
LET'S DO THIS

>>15526130
this is for you Mr. No Fun

>>15526293
I can fap to this

>>15526293
Fap-tastic

>>15526257
Well, yeah, we have a party. We just made them.

A party who travels on a bus. Is this bus magical? Will we ever know?

I am now imagining a setting where the entire world is a massive city with sprawling dungeons and things sharing underground space with sewers and subways. The world is sparsly inhabited in key areas, the rest being run-down slums and ghettos filled with orc gang-hordes and goblins and such.

And your party's bus has broken down along the dark, lesser-used paths between two inhabited areas. The chances of finding a Petrolomancer are slim. What do you do, Thron and co.?

I like how the pipe of the hookah is sticking down her kilt.

>>15525221
Narly MacThep was once a man, actually. Thron worships him partially because of MacThep being one of her ancestors.

>>15526321
Makes you want to begin an adventure with this group .

rolled 9 = 9

>>15526321
Check for any substances we might use in lieu of a petrolmancer.

>rollan D20

>>15526355
Minotaur milk enchanted by the wizard.

i request this be archived

>>15526355
You find BEEEEEES. This is to be expected. Hanz informs you if would take a lot of dead bees, a lack of needed bacteria, and a few million years to make them into an unrefined version of something that could, with a lot of work, be turned into petrol.

So, that's a no then?

>>15526372
OMNESEIN STOP BEING A LAZY FUCKER AND CONJURE UP SOME GOD DAMN PETROL

>>15526371
Yes on that

>>15526384
He doesn't have the needed material components, namely a dead body. He eyes the wizard, and says you could go looking for one, or one of you could volunteer.

rolled 11, 1 = 12

Rolls for time magic in making of the freaking petrol

>>15526399
Unfortunately, you lack the proper Brooklyn accent to command the Time Roulette.

>>15526416
MOTHERFUCK LET'S JUST GO OUTSIDE AND HARVEST UP SOME DEAD BODIES

rolled 4 = 4

>>15526489
Rampage!! Roll to lure people with some epic Bard Music!!
Rolling with d20 (got bored with d12)

rolled 10 = 10

>>15526522
OMNESEIN YOU KNOW YOU COULD, LIKE, FUCKING SLAUGHTER EVERYTHING OUT HERE
NO?
NO, NOT GUNNA DO IT?
FINE YOU LAZY FUCK, I HOPE GODS DO EXIST AND STRIKE YOU RIGHT THE FUCK DOWN
MAN

>>15526489
You exit your trusty bus. All around are cliche heaps of trash. Newspapers from bygone empires in strange scripts blow across the wastes. Broken appliances rest outside for no reason. Grabage that by all rights shouldn't be in the streets are, and vehicles that are more rust and charred metal than anything else rest at odd angles.

It's all very atmospheric, but useless. All around tower buildings, many with broken windows or large holes in them. This street, being part of a lesser-used pass-way, is free of large obstacles like half-a-buildings.

Gang-signs of various creatures that roam the forgotten slums mark the street-corners. Evening is falling, and the streetlamps in this area have long since ceased to work. The gentle bizzing of bees breaking the evening silence as you contemplate your next move.

Well, I assume you're contemplating. Maybe you're just staring at your surroundings in slack-jaw amazement. I don't know.

>>15526527
Omnesein says he'll guard the bus.
He's such a lazy bastard. Well, you really tried to motivate him with anger, but it seems he's in one of his "Chill" moods today.

You're not sure if he's bipolar, or just holding out on all the good drugs.

>>15526522
Do I look like OP? No. It's all d20 now.

Your epic rampage music comes out as soft, mellow bagpipe soudns and the mild buzzing of new bees. Seriously, do you even realize what you play?

HOLY SHIT THE THREAD WAS ARCHIVED
THAT'S FUCKING AWESOME
>>15526601
GOD DAMN IT
ALRIGHT TURTLE, CAST SOME MAGIC OR SOME SHIT AND FIND SOMEONE TO KILL SO WE CAN GET THE BUS MOVING AGAIN
FUCK

rolled 18 = 18

Train bee army to kill strangers and harvest corpses

(i'm gonna blow this)

>>15526645
ALRIGHT THEN ROLL FOR MAGIC, MOTHERFUCKER.

Frederico dances his Samba of Locate Gangbangers. Let's wait and see how well he does.

rolled 18 = 18

>>15526667
NOOOOO TURTLE WHAT ARE YOU DOING
YOU DO NOT DANCE TO FIND THINGS
YOU MAGIC THINGS

>>15526653
Well, yeah, it's an animate baghookah of Infinite Bees. Of course it controls the bees. How the hell do you think you use it as a weapon?

Jeez, if you didn't control the bees, they'd sting the fuck out of the party, all day, e'ery day! BEEES, man. BEEEEEEEES.

rolled 3 = 3

>>15526685
Then lets get to it, we know where there is gangbangers and the bees are feeling like killing some.

>>15526681
HIS SOMATIC COMPONENTS ARE DANCE.
DON'T QUESTION HIM, HE FOUND YOU A GANG OF GOBLINS.

Frederico guides you to a run-down apartment building a few blocks away from your bus. Light pours from a few rooms. Maybe it's still hooked into the power grid, maybe they lit the building on fire in soem areas. Who knows man, goblins.

You see a few goblins hanging out on the stoop, drinking some mass-magically produced booze from an InfiVend brand machine. There are seven of them. Three carry handguns, one has a flamethrower, one is weilding a spiker chain, one has a knife, and the last. . .

That Goblin is nonchalantly weilding a RPG-7. What the hell?

rolled 7 = 7

>>15526736
Ah, the Señoritas must believe they are the players of this game, no?

Perhaps we could turn their beliefs against them? Send the bees against them, make them waster their ammo?

Or send a couple of bees up that vato's Rocket launcher, clogging the barrel? And when he fires; KABOOM!

rolled 15 = 15

>>15526736
Frederico challenges them to a dance-off

>>15526845
You launch your bees in a stealth mission. They will have no official support, and if they are captured, they will be disavowed. They must find all their own equipment in the field.

They're fucking horrible at it, what with all the buzzing and shit. The Goblin with the flamethrower makes quick work of turning them into a horde of flaming bees.

If you'd rolled better, maybe they would have brought firey stinging death to the goblins. As it stands, they just died dramatically. That's what you get for doing Frederico's voice, you dweeb. Thron's the star of this show.

>>15524741
lolercoaster

>>15526872
You stealth mission a bust, Frederico says he knows what to do. He advances out into the night, snapping his finegrs, and looking menacing in a way that's only believable in a world of musical theatre.

The goblins get up, and in a carefully calcuklated musical number that looks like it's been carefully rehearsed, but for the purposes of this example are supposedly done on the fly, they proclaim in a song-and-dance number that this is Jets territory, and eagerly go with the dance-off to determine what happens next. If they win, it's combat. TO THE DEATH.

Roll for dancing, for what you want to happen if you win, and for Hanz and Thron's actions, if you want them to help.

rolled 10, 13, 4 = 27

>>15526927
Frederico tap dances like a mad-man, sending up sparks from his flint-tipped shoes (part of his fire magic)

Hanz spins, increasing his dodge

Thron plays a tricksy beat to throw off the goblins

>>15526948
Wow you suck. Way to not let anyone save the action from your trainwreck.

If anyone wants to do individual rolls to not let this clusterfuck through, I'll give you a shot.

rolled 1, 20, 18 = 39

Federico Dances El Tango de la Muerte!

Hanz plays the girl's part, Thron accompanies with a heartfelt solo!

rolled 19 = 19

>>15526986
what part of "individual rolls" do you not understand?

>>15526986
WHYYYYY!
SOMEONE RE-ROLL FEDERICO!

Or not, for comical relief.

rolled 2 = 2

>>15526998
Well, you are a jerk! and smell bad!

rolled 13 = 13

Frederico tap in the rhythm of "Hall of Mountain King"

>>15526986
Fuck it, sure.

Hanz, being a bus driver, falls under Frederico lead, and play's the girl's part, since they're the same size. Thron plays a musical number to accompany, creating a new swarm of bees.

Frederico quickly realize he's outcmatched by a whole game, and attempts the dangerous Triple-Step Double-Tango Super-Deluxe with a quarter-spin backturn.

Instead, he launches himself at the goblins, and bowls them all over. In the following explosion from a goblin landing on an RPG-7, the goblin and Frederico are all caught in a massive explosion.

Roll to save versus death. Maybe you should have thought of the dangers of dancing a dance of death?

rolled 3 = 3

>>15527054
NO, FEDERICO NOOOO!

>>15527072
You say that with your mouth, but your rolls, your rolls say otherwise.

I hope you're happy. Murderer.

rolled 4 = 4

>>15527072
WHAT THE FUCK
I LEAVE YOU ALONE FOR LIKE FIFTEEN MINUTES OR WHATEVER AND YOU GO AND KILL FREDERICO

INCOMPETENCE
OH WELL WHATEVER, OMNESIEN CAN PROBABLY RESURRECT HIM OR SOMETHING IF YOU CAN SCROUNGE UP 25,000 GOLD IN DIAMONDS

>>15527107
Well, maybe you have that much.
>>4
Nope, you don't.

Well, there are some salvagable dead bits here, including a smoking turtleshell.

The bees go off to collect some goblin bits. Turn out they're too fucking weak, being fucking bees.

just so you know, you all suck at making characters, but this is MOTHERFUCKING HILARIOUS, so I forgive you all.

>>15527184
SAY THAT TO HANZ'S FACE, MOTHERFUCKER
THAT +2 DEXTERITY MAKES HIM THE BEST BUS DRIVER THERE'S EVER BEEN

rolled 12 = 12

Hanz picks up Frederico's shell and wears it like a hat.

>>15527369
Hanz appropriates Frederico's shell as a smoldering hat, gathers some goblin bits, and rushes back to the bus.

rolled 9 = 9

The party magics up some petrol. Oh wait, can they still do that? No? Thron gets out and pushes the bus then.

Omnesein turns the goblin bits into petrol. And he complements Hanz on his new hat, saying Frederico has never been more useful.

Frederico would not have helped with the petrol. Being a Sambamancer, Petrolomancy is a barred school of magic for him.

With the bus gassed up and ready to go, Hanz gets you all the fuck out of there and on your way before the Goblin gangs get over the explosion and come after you all for your loot.