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  • File : 1307142326.png-(49 KB, 990x765, Knights Inductor pauldron left.png)
    49 KB Return of the Reasonable Marines Not LongPoster... 06/03/11(Fri)19:05 No.15148501  
    Hello again, dear readers! Presenting Chapter Five: Bending the Rules, in which Rightina learns that the Apriori tech-priests have a rather...different perspective on the Quest for Knowledge than most of their colleagues. It's a nice, long chapter, since the last one was so short. Check out other Knights Inductor writings (including the previous chapters of Return of the Reasonable Marines) on 1d4chan, here: http://1d4chan.org/wiki/Category:Knights_Inductor
    >> CHAPTER FIVE: Bending the Rules Not LongPoster... 06/03/11(Fri)19:06 No.15148509
    While not a tech-priestess herself, Rightina had received some training by the Mechanicus so that she could identify the many forms of techno-heresy, and she had seen multiple infractions on her first visit to the Aprior system – the Apriori Imperial Guard regiments made use of Land Raiders, and the Knights Inductor had developed stealth fields for Terminator armor which could only have been based on Tau stealth-suits.

    Of course, that had been before the panel's verdict; now that she had been assigned to examine the Aprior Sector for every deviation from Imperial norms, the local Mechanicus had, with some protest, granted her access to what they called their “Primary Workshop.” At first, Rightina had been furious at the perceived slight, demanding to see their central Forge World, but she received an unexpected answer: the Aprior Sector had none. Some planets were more industrialized than others, but the idea of dedicating a whole planet to nothing but manufacturing and research flew directly in the face of the Apriori ideal of self-reliance and decentralization – such a world would be reliant on other planets for its food and manpower, and other worlds would be dependent on it for manufactured goods. Instead, the Apriori tech-priests had developed a distributed model: each world in the Aprior Sector was home to some number of general-purpose manufactora and laboratories – some of these were highly specialized for more expensive fields of research or production, but any facility could, with time, take on any role as needed. The Aprior System, as the first system to be pacified by the Knights Inductor (and their techmarines), had the most such facilities, and most of these were on the moons of Aprior Quartus, including the “Primary Workshop” on the largest moon.
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/03/11(Fri)19:07 No.15148523
    Harald, for all his training, was no more a tech-priest than Rightina, so they were accompanied by one: Artisan Zora, a specialist in power armor maintenance, manufacturing, and design, and apparently one of the dedicated spokespeople for the Apriori Mechanicus. When they first met her, the reason for this was clear: she had carefully crafted her appearance to be approachable by lay people. Rather than being a bristling mass of wires and cables, Zora kept most of her augmentations concealed, either under her robes or behind her facemask – a mostly-opaque plastic or glass oval, with two lights shining through where her eyes would normally be. Her eye-lights narrowed and turned upward in a “smile” as she greeted the two of them.

    “Agent Olson, Inquisitor Immam, welcome to our Primary Workshop!” Her voice had a synthesized edge to it, but it retained a sort of lilt from whatever her original accent had been – something vaguely Vostroyan or Valhallan. “We are the largest research and manufacturing facility in the Sector, and I imagine your time is limited. Is there anything you would like to see in particular?”

    Rightina thought quickly. Demanding to see tech-heresy wouldn't go over well, but there had to be a way to make them proud to show her their deviations. “I've heard that you do...novel things with STC designs – making your own patterns, and such. Can I see where that happens?”
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/03/11(Fri)19:08 No.15148528
    Zora took the bait, and nodded eagerly. “Certainly! We spend a great deal of effort on research here – we must keep ahead of our enemies, you know. Right this way, please!”

    As they walked, Zora pointed out the many laboratory wings that they passed, where tech-priests studied every subject conceivable. “If we are to research and work intelligently, we need to understand the world, and figure out how to make things do what we want them to do. The Ancients knew a great deal, but we have lost all primary sources from that time, so we have to learn indirectly. The way that we do that is by studying and understanding their works – the STC schematics. By understanding why they built things the way they did, we can learn the fundamental laws behind their engineering and science, and be able to create designs ideal for our circumstances.”

    Rightina spoke up, trying to keep her tone neutral. “I've spoken with tech-priests before, and they were big on tradition – 'to break with ritual is to break with faith,' they say. Have you ever wondered if trying to improve on the Ancients' work might be dangerous?”
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/03/11(Fri)19:08 No.15148538
    Zora stopped short and fell silent with a sour look, and Rightina was afraid that she had pushed too hard, but the Artisan responded icily: “I see you have been listening to those rusty old – fogeys – on Mars.” Her tone indicated that she had intended to call the Martian tech-priests something stronger, but thought better of it at the last minute. “I want you to understand what we do here, Inquisitor. We are not hereteks. We are nothing but loyal to the Imperium, but we are also practical people. Every year, we are finding ourselves with fewer and fewer vital components to old STC designs, without the knowledge and means to duplicate them – not least because the Forge Worlds keep everything to themselves, by the way. Meanwhile, our foes are expanding their production capacities and advancing their designs faster and faster! We cannot sustain this state of affairs, Inquisitor – something must change!” Zora paused, and forced herself to relax – the Inquisitor was serving the Imperium just as much as she was – and explained, “we would follow the STC plans to the letter if we could, but they weren't created with us in mind – they were adapted to whatever world printed them. Suppose we are creating a weapon which requires some widget that we do not have and cannot create; we will need to use a substitute for that widget. But there are other components which require the widget, so we will have to change those, and there are systems which are optimized to support the widget, so we will have to change those so they support with the substitute, and the systems which we change depend on and are depended on by other systems, and...before long, we are changing so much, not all of which is well-understood, that we would be better off just creating something new.”
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/03/11(Fri)19:09 No.15148547
    “So why study the STC designs at all?”

    “Because the STC schematics are the result of the Ancients applying their knowledge.” Zora wracked her brain and cogitator for an example. “Think of the schematics as specific mathematical equations, like 'two plus two makes four,' 'one plus seven makes eight,' and so on. These equations are nice, but the deeper knowledge – understanding the 'plus' operator – is what is truly powerful, as it lets you create many equations, equations that are useful to you, not just the equations that the Ancients thought were worth writing down. The STC printouts can be useful, but we are most interested in knowing the laws of science and engineering that the Ancients knew and applied – that is the real Quest for Knowledge, in our opinion.” Zora heaved a weary sigh. “When I talk to Magi and other high-ranking tech-priests, I feel like they cannot see the forest for the trees; they are so caught up in the STC schematics that they forget that the knowledge behind them is what is truly powerful.”
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/03/11(Fri)19:10 No.15148556
    Zora's words sounded nice, Rightina thought, but did this philosophy deliver? “What have you learned from the schematics, and what have you developed with it?”

    Zora brightened immediately at Rightina's interest. “Oh, all sorts of things – to both of your questions! For example, from the schematics for the Land Speeder, the servo-skull, and various starship classes, we have reverse-engineered a general-purpose theory of gravity manipulation – we are still working out the particulars of the interactions at the sub-atomic level, but we can make gravity run up, down, and sideways if we like, at almost any distance-scale and strength. Our trains can easily accelerate at 10 times the normal acceleration of gravity, but you did not feel that because gravity generators create a counter-acceleration field inside the train. There is no STC train design which can accelerate that quickly or that safely, but we needed one to link our cities, so we designed it and made it!” Come to think of it, besides a little bump at the start and end of a ride, Rightina had never felt any acceleration on her train rides in the Aprior Sector. Meanwhile, Zora seemed to have forgiven the Inquisitor's question, and she led Rightina and Harald to the testing facility, where they might see the fruits of the Workshop's labors with their own eyes.
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/03/11(Fri)19:11 No.15148565
    As they walked, Zora happily chattered about every project they passed, Mars-sanctioned or not. In general, it seemed that the Apriori were most concerned about replacing or duplicating rare archeotech; these also happened to be the projects which required the most deviation from the STC canon, and the ones which faced the most difficulty, as the old technology relics were of a quality that the Apriori tech-priests could not reproduce. This was especially apparent in their attempts to create power-armor and Terminator suits using entirely known and reproducible technologies, which were running into what Zora called the “Three-S problem:” they could have some combination of Speed, Strength, and Simplicity, but not all three. Meanwhile, the best and oldest suits of armor were getting rarer and rarer as parts wore out and other suits had to be cannibalized for replacements. “At current rates of use, we will have no more suits of Artificer armor in about three centuries,” Zora explained, “so we must have replacements ready by then.”

    For the moment, the Workshop had developed several lines of substitute power armor, all of which were inferior in some ways to the Dark Age technology, but were infinitely easier to produce. The most basic was the Trooper, a simple powered exoskeleton (not even fully enclosed) that might be employed by Space Marine Scouts, Imperial Guardsmen, or Sisters of Battle, as it required no implants, and yet enhanced strength by almost an order of magnitude and, by taking loads off of the wearer, could sustain a pace twice that of a conventional army. Already, artillery units and transport and manufacturing facilities were starting to employ a variant of Marauder armor optimized for cargo handling, as a replacement for unwieldy loading cranes and gantries.
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/03/11(Fri)19:12 No.15148576
    The next step up was the Marauder, a fully enclosed and modular suit of true powered armor. Depending on a mission's requirements, the Marauder could be given a balance of speed and strength (but not both), with several hardpoints for weapons, sensors, implant interface ports, and other attachments. The Reserve Companies were beginning to train with Marauder armor, with each variety of Marine being given a variant which best supported their role – strength and integrated targeting for the Devastators, speed for the Assault Marines, and a balance for the Tactical Marines.

    The Crusader was the strongest and largest of the new designs, intended to replace Terminator armor. It was much bulkier than Terminator armor, as the tech-priests could not fabricate fiber bundles as strong and as light as the oldest Terminator suits. Somewhere during the Crusader's development, somebody had noticed that an unenhanced human (or a multiple-amputee Astartes) could sit entirely inside the chest, and so the Crusader was also being considered as a replacement for the Sentinel and Dreadnought. Apparently, the suit's vaguely anthropomorphic layout made it more intuitive to operate.
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/03/11(Fri)19:13 No.15148594
    The tech-priests were having more success at replacing old vehicle technology, as there was more room available to modify designs as needed. Rightina had already seen how the Aprior Sector produced enough Land Raiders to use them for their Guard and PDF as well as the Knights Inductor, but she was surprised to see that they were also creating entirely new weapons of war. Zora took Harald and Rightina to a carefully isolated test chamber which seemed to stretch on to infinity. “This is a weapons testing range, ten kilometers long,” she explained, “and you are about to see our latest design!” A short turret protruded from the ground and took aim down the range, where a massive armor wall had been elevated into place.

    “Warning,” a synthesized voice called, “grav-driver firing. Clear the range.” Zora seemed to suddenly remember that Harald and Rightina had organic ears, so she handed them a set of earmuffs. “Capacitor banks charged. Safety control has confirmed range cleared. Firing in five seconds. Two seconds. Fir–”

    The voice was interrupted by a tremendous thunderclap as a fireball streaked from the turret and blasted into the armor wall; when Rightina's eyes recovered from the flash, she saw a hole had been punched straight through it!
    >> Anonymous 06/03/11(Fri)19:19 No.15148641
    I am new to the reasonable marines and OhMyGodEmperorThisIsAwesome.
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/03/11(Fri)19:19 No.15148642
    “That was the gravity-manipulation mass driver,” Zora beamed. “It uses our gravity manipulation technology to accelerate a projectile to ten times the speed of sound – that's fast enough to cross the range in less than three seconds – and it will tear through anything, as you just saw. It makes a mess of organic targets, for that matter, but it is intended for anti-armor. Since there are no moving parts – except for the bullet, of course – it is simple to build and resistant to damage.”

    Rightina frowned. “It's impressive, but why use this instead of a lascannon?”

    “Energy losses, mostly – a dense projectile loses less energy over its flight through atmosphere than a laser pulse, and since it cannot diffuse, we end up with more energy delivered per unit area. We are still having some problems with that fireball – it happens because the projectile is moving so quickly that it ignites the atmosphere by friction, and it tears up the barrel, but we are improving; it used to be that we had to replace the barrel after every shot!”
    >> Anonymous 06/03/11(Fri)19:24 No.15148691
         File1307143463.jpg-(51 KB, 396x385, 1302278540381.jpg)
    51 KB
    >mfw The Imperium of Man will never be this reasonable
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/03/11(Fri)19:29 No.15148723
    The tech-priests had even managed to create entirely new vehicles, like the Valkyrie Avenger. “The Knights Inductor are best at surgical strikes,” Zora explained, “but the Codex Astartes and STC library only provide for a very small number of ways to insert them – a couple of varieties of Thunderhawk, the Drop Pod, and the teleporter. They wanted something like the Valkyrie or Land Speeder Storm, but capable of carrying power-armor or Terminator armor, so they could fly a small team into a target zone without requiring a starship to be directly overhead or a vessel too large to be stealthy.” The result was shorter, wider, and more armored than its parent vessel, with a cockpit that took after the Land Speeder, with the two operators side-by-side.

    Rightina felt a twinge of regret as she burst Zora's enthusiasm by mentioning the Stormraven. Zora howled, “You mean Mars has been sitting on a vehicle like this for millennia?! Omnissiah's brass bearings, we spent decades on this thing!” After she'd taken a moment to calm herself, she demanded, “Why in the world would they keep that sort of design to themselves? We are not stingy with our blueprints – I have spoken with tech-priests at other Forge Worlds, the lower-ranking ones anyway, and they are most grateful that we share our results. Are those rusty shrapshunts trying to keep everyone dependent on Mars? They are hurting the Imperium with their greed!” Zora realized that she was getting worked up again, and that Rightina couldn't answer her questions, anyway. “I am sorry to snap at you, Inquisitor, but every day that we delay is a day that our armed forces are inadequately equipped, and that is a gap which we cannot afford to leave open.”
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/03/11(Fri)19:30 No.15148733
    Rightina sensed an opening. “So you do whatever is necessary to keep up with the enemies of the Imperium?”

    “Absolutely!”

    “Even imitating them?”

    Zora narrowed her eye-lights. “What are you trying to say, Inquisitor?”

    “I did my research on you on the way to the Sector; there are records of you using Terminator armor with stealth systems – systems which could only have come from Tau stealth-suits. Frankly, out here on the Eastern Fringe, I'm not surprised that you've been tempted, but I would have expected better from an Artisan. 'The alien mechanism is a perversion of the True Path,' and all that.”
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/03/11(Fri)19:33 No.15148757
    Zora's fists clenched, and she forced them to relax. “I see those rust-brained sump-suckers have you hook, line, and sinker,” she finally seethed. “I will show you what they call 'xeno-heresy;' what you make of it is your concern, but you will hear my justification for our work.” She turned on her heel, and led Harald and Rightina to an iris door, larger and heavier than the others. The words “Reverse Engineering” were etched into the archway overhead, and the door only dilated after Zora plugged her right hand into a socket and entered a password, revealing an airlock with an identical door at the far end. Automated security turrets rested in alcoves, but their lights signaled that they were carefully screening the trio; when the door irised shut behind them, the lights blinked green, and the door before them dilated to reveal a sterile hallway, lined with windows and control panels. As Rightina peered in the nearby windows, she recognized pieces of xeno-technology behind each: Tau stealth-suits, Ork and Eldar weapons, and even some vehicles in larger chambers. Each chamber was filled with sensors and manipulator arms, and some held servitors made in the image of the aliens which once owned the technology within.

    “This is our reverse-engineering facility,” Zora explained. “Each piece of technology you see here was either captured in battle or donated by defectors. We figure out how they work, observing them with the sensors and operating them with the manipulator arms and remote-operation servitors. With time, we can discover the underlying principles behind their operation, and develop technology – human technology – which duplicates their effect, or even does better.”
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/03/11(Fri)19:34 No.15148769
    Rightina stared. “Why – how does this fit with the Quest for Knowledge?”

    “The laws of the universe bind the xenos as much as they bind us; we can learn from their technology in the same way that we learn from the STC blueprints. Eldar and Ork technology is still somewhat beyond us, but the Tau's fascination with plasma and electromagnetic technology has enabled us to learn much, which allows us to improve our own technology.”

    “And the thought that this understanding happens with the help of xenos doesn't bother you at all? Have you so little ability that you must depend on them?” Rightina scoffed.

    Zora gave a short bark of laughter. “I am slightly peeved that they beat us in the short run, but at our present rates of research, we will overcome them in the end. And do not make the mistake of assuming that we depend on the xenos – this wing has no manufacturing capacity, and our policies strictly forbid us from rendering vital infrastructures dependent on xenotechnology. Everything that we make, we make ourselves.”

    Harald coughed to attract Zora's attention. “That statement is somewhat misleading,” he explained. “Everything is made by Apriori, but not necessarily by humans.”

    By this point, Rightina wasn't sure that she cared if the Apriori tech-priests employed xenos or not; they had already proven so far divergent from the norm, what difference did it make? She quashed that thought – if nothing else, she ought to make sure that these xenos weren't a further threat to the Imperium.
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/03/11(Fri)19:35 No.15148782
    >Coming soon (probably very soon): Chapter Six: Know Thy Enemy, in which Rightina meets the xenos employed by the Aprior Sector. Also, Chapter Seven: Returning to the Fold, where we see Apriori Internal Security and their efforts to reform and treat cultists, heretics, and mutants.

    >U like? U mad? I can only improve by your feedback.
    >> The God-Emperor of Mankind 06/03/11(Fri)19:36 No.15148785
    >>15148782

    I am loving every single word. I wish you could write fluff for other homebrews as well...
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/03/11(Fri)19:46 No.15148861
    >>15148641
    I'm glad you like it.

    >>15148691
    >Iknowthatfeel.jpg
    For every Artisan Zora, there are thousands of Magi who would see her disassembled and turned into a servitor for her "crime" of trying to understand the universe.

    >>15148785
    I did write Index Astartes: Desert Fangs, and I'm working on IA: Sky Serpents. I also like the idea several anons have suggested, about a Deathwatch mission involving several /tg/ chapters. I might try my hand at that; I'm already imagining a scene where a Knight Inductor and an Angry Marine play "good Arbitrator / bad Arbitrator" with some traitors.

    "Now, if you cooperate, I can promise that your deaths will be swift and painless, and your homeworld will be better off for it."

    "JUST FUCKING IMAGINE WHAT I'LL DO TO YOU IF YOU DON'T SPILL!"
    >> Anonymous 06/03/11(Fri)19:48 No.15148873
    >>15148782
    I maddened with love.
    >> Anonymous 06/03/11(Fri)19:51 No.15148897
    I always loved Reasonable Marines.
    >> Anonymous 06/03/11(Fri)20:20 No.15149087
    This. Is amazing. This is how the Imperium "should" be.

    Fucking Glorious.

    I heartily approve. *tears of manliness*
    >> Haruka Emmerich !t623AA5Yew 06/03/11(Fri)23:10 No.15150525
    Reasonably-timed bump.
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/04/11(Sat)00:26 No.15151241
    One shameless self bump for me before bedtime; I will answer questions/comments and most likely have Chapter Six ("Know Thy Enemy") tomorrow (~12 hours from now), if the thread is still alive then.
    >> Anonymous 06/04/11(Sat)00:52 No.15151469
    Oh man fuck yes return of the reasonable marines I have been looking forward to this so much.

    Excellent but I am concerned about the increasing levels of Mary Sueness. The Enforced technological stagnation is a big thing in canon and its what keeps the humans on a relatively equal footing, rather than rapidly improving.

    Still, since the Reasonable Marines are basically a "what if the Imperium were not stupid" thought experiment its ok - probably getting too good to put in a codex though.
    >> Anonymous 06/04/11(Sat)01:00 No.15151515
    Also heres an idea. Sure they fixed up the place good, but old ideas don't die easily. The Reasonable Marines in their planetary administration probably have to deal with religious opposition from some segments of the populace fairly regularly - batshit extremists will always be around.

    Also, a lot of the mindset of the imperium comes from being under threat constantly. War brings people together, unites them under a single ideology that is paranoid about outsiders. Obviously the Reasonable Marines work very hard to oppose this tendency, recognising the rigidity of society it produces, but it has to be expressed in some way or another. It can't all be rainbows and hand holding.
    >> Anonymous 06/04/11(Sat)01:03 No.15151532
    >>15151515
    Nice GET, battle brother.
    >> Taffer 06/04/11(Sat)02:33 No.15152178
    >>15151515
    I'd have to admit you raise a good point. People like the status quo because its the status quo. Its familiar. Even though it holds the people back, its alright with them as they know what to do.

    Furthermore, OP you said about ideas getting out of the Apriori system. Well how about ideas getting in, like a more militant, rigid and Monodominant ideology. That, plus the extremists you find in any society could prove a problem to the KI.

    PS: A nice 15 quad Get with a nice idea. 5 star post. <applause>
    >> Anonymous 06/04/11(Sat)06:09 No.15153293
    If I ever get into tabletop 40k, this is what I'll play.
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/04/11(Sat)10:16 No.15154244
    >re: stagnation and status quo
    The Aprior Sector is also tiny -- about the size of the Tau Empire. Part of the backstory is that the Sector was cut off from the Imperium for about a thousand years, so they literally had to advance or die. These guys could find a whole working STC, and it still wouldn't upset the status quo, because they just don't have the manpower to do anything but hold on to their little patch of space.

    >re: religious extremists
    There was a quick mention in a previous chapter, but the Aprior Sector does have people who don't like their policies (in particular, some people were protesting their genetic screening program) -- usually, they just make noise, but violence has occurred in the past. An upcoming chapter ("The Limits of Reason") will deal with such an event (or maybe several), either discussing one from the past or encountering one in the present. I'm still debating how and where and when it will happen -- the Knights Inductor were pacifying systems for thousands of years before they got to the Aprior Sector, which is a lot of opportunities for a world to erupt in violence in the middle of pacification, if the Knights tried to change things too quickly. They have learned their lesson and applied it to the Aprior Sector, but the old tensions are still present. There's also the matter of tricky Xenos -- the Tau have tried and failed to annex the Sector many times, so the Ethereals may have decided that their Greater Good is best served by engineering the Apriori's destruction, by inflaming and supporting rebellious elements.

    I'm looking forward to writing about how the Knights Inductor respond when everything goes ploin-shaped (and besides, who am I to argue with quads?). On one hand, they need to maintain order, but on the other hand, they have sworn to protect all human life, including humans who disagree with them!
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/04/11(Sat)15:03 No.15155873
    Shameless self bump -- I'm writing as fast as I can, almost done...

    >how ngignati
    >> Anonymous 06/04/11(Sat)15:44 No.15156219
    >>15155873
    Excellent...
    >> CHAPTER SIX: Know Thy Enemy Not LongPoster... 06/04/11(Sat)16:30 No.15156576
    The xenos were employed (Zora had reacted indignantly when Rightina had asked where they were “kept”) in one of the furthest wings of the xenotechnology vault; Harald explained that this was because of a longstanding policy known colloquially as “sandboxing” – nobody knew the exact origin of the name, but it meant that individuals of unknown trustworthiness were generally allowed to act as they saw fit, but were prevented from accessing resources which could be used against the Apriori. In the case of the xenos employed by the tech-priests, they were given support for their research, and allowed to cooperate from a distance on projects which related to their fields of expertise, but they could not directly access the Workshop's networks.

    It seemed that most, if not all, of the xenos employed at the Workshop were Tau, of the Earth Caste. Rightina had heard of humans who had defected en masse to the Tau; had these xenos done the same?

    “Why not ask them yourself?” Zora indicated the most senior xeno present. “That is Acolyte Underminer – that is a rough translation of his name, and his former occupation.”

    Hearing his name, Underminer turned to Zora, and then he saw Rightina. “I did not expect to encounter the Imperial Inquisition out here,” he admitted.

    “Of course not – nobody expects the Imperial Inquisition.” Rightina cleared her throat. “So, Underminer; what proof do you have that this isn't an act?”
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/04/11(Sat)16:31 No.15156582
    Underminer swept his hat from his head, revealing a long scar from front to back, just to the right of center. “This scar is from the surgery to excise my olfactory control node. The Ethereals no longer have a hold over me – or any of us; our will is our own, and we have cast our lot with the Aprior Sector, and your Imperium.” His voice retained the precise, clipped Tau accent, although its edge had softened with the time spent among humans.

    Rightina scoffed. “And I'm supposed to accept that?”

    Underminer shrugged drily. “Accept it, or not; I'm sandboxed, just in case they turn out to be wrong about me. 'Trust, but verify,' as they say.”

    A piece of advice from Inquisitor Lord Damnos sprung to Rightina's mind: “Never trust defectors – they betrayed their first master, and they will betray you as well!”

    Of course, everyone did have lines they would not cross, or values which they would not compromise. Organizations changed, and maybe a member would leave if he was more loyal to ideals than to people. There was only one way to find out: “May I ask what convinced you to change your allegiance?”
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/04/11(Sat)16:39 No.15156654
    Underminer fell silent as he struggled to recall his days as a Tau Engineer. “My memories of the end of my service to the Tau Empire are...uncertain, but I do know that my task force came upon some ancient structures, or possibly an ancient artifact; I do not recall what took place there, but the Ethereal decided that the Greater Good would be best served by destroying us. He told us to die – for the Greater Good – but I – I could not. None of us could.” Underminer's voice faltered as he remembered the terrible choking cold that had clutched his throat and stifled his heart, but then he remembered the heat, the resolve, whatever it had been that had resisted, and how his comrades-in-arms had struggled back to life as well, and his spirit returned. “Whatever we had seen, it changed us so that we would not just lie down and die, so they had us marked for re-education. The camp was overrun by the Imperium, and I feared that we would be put to death, but the Knights Inductor spared us, and the Apriori Imperial Guard just...took us in. They flew us straight to the Aprior Sector – it was only later that I even offered my expertise, so they didn't save us for what we knew – they thought that we were worth saving by virtue of our existence!”
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/04/11(Sat)16:40 No.15156672
    Underminer's pride in his adopted people swelled, empowering his voice. “The Ethereals used us, I realized later – we were nothing to them, tools to be discarded on their path to galactic domination. They do not believe in any Greater Good, they believe in what is good for them alone. And then, we learned of your God-Emperor, a man who made the ultimate sacrifice so that his Imperium might live, and how your generals lead from the fore of their armies, how every citizen, one way or another, is dedicated to the Imperium's defense, and we realized that your Imperium better exemplifies the Greater Good than our own Empire did! When we realized that this was the case, we swore – long live the Imperium and the God-Emperor, and death to the Ethereals!”

    Rightina had to admit that she had never heard a Tau speak so passionately in favor of the Ethereals; indeed, Underminer's fervor had left her speechless in a manner that most Imperial preachers couldn't manage. Finally, she found her voice again. “How many are you?”
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/04/11(Sat)16:42 No.15156685
    “There were twenty workers who served under me, perhaps a hundred to a hundred and fifty Fire Warriors, ten pilots. I understand that some have become advisors to the Apriori Armed Forces and Internal Security, others wished to retire to civilian life.”

    “Any other xenos work here?”

    “A few other Tau defectors – not many.”

    “Generally, an Ethereal will command his force to kill itself rather than risk capture; we only rarely manage to capture them before then or resuscitate them afterward,” Harald clarified.

    Underminer continued. “Besides us, there were a few Orks a while ago, from Kaptin Feegul's crew, and I heard that there was an Eldar here once, and then there is Elliot.”

    The name sounded normal enough, although, knowing xenos, it was probably a translation, or a part of a longer name. “And what is he?”

    A voice like crumpling paper answered from behind Rightina: “I am very old.”
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/04/11(Sat)16:44 No.15156697
    Rightina spun around to face Elliot, and found that he looked more than old – he looked positively ancient, with skin as grey as ash. His face was gaunt, with long ears like an Eldar, but without their typical elegance, and it seemed to be fixed with a permanently dour expression. His body was thin and bowed, and he seemed to be so fragile that a gentle breeze would blow him away. In spite of his apparent frailty, his green, sunken eyes had an unnatural intensity; overall, he looked like a corpse which had animated itself out of spite. Everyone in the room took an involuntary step back, but Rightina managed to summon some bravado. “That's nice, but what manner of xeno are you?”

    “I am one of, if not the last Necrontyr.” Elliot's scowl deepened. “You have probably encountered my former cousins, the Necrons.”

    “And why aren't you one of them?”
    >> Anonymous 06/04/11(Sat)16:46 No.15156706
    >Necrontyr

    .....HOLEEEEEEE SHEEEEEEET
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/04/11(Sat)16:47 No.15156717
    “I had always had my doubts about the C'tan, and then when getting 'upgraded' became compulsory, I and some others fled our empire. We knew that the C'tan would eventually overreach themselves and destroy their food supply, and then they would have no choice but to hibernate. We hoped to leave warnings which would explain their threat, which would then be found by future life-forms.” He looked down at his arm. “I decided to make myself part of the warning, sealing away a necrodermis protoform with my personality and memories.” Elliot closed his hand into a fist, and his voice started to shake. “My wife, Alice, would have been uploaded with me, but...” Elliot's fist clenched so tightly that his arm trembled. “She sacrificed herself, that I might complete my mission,” he finally whispered. “That damned deceitful Messenger took her soul!” His eyes blazed with fury. “This sector, and especially your Knights Inductor, show signs of genetic meddling by the Necrons. They have heavily committed themselves in this region, and I am certain that this is a critical battleground in the war against them. With my expertise, and this sector's industrial base, the Necron forces will be broken here, and Alice's sacrifice will not be in vain!”

    “And how can we be sure that you won't change your mind at the last minute?”

    Elliot laughed bitterly. “I could raise every Necron in the sector if I wanted – I helped design the early-generation protoforms. If I were a servant of the C'tan, I would have harvested this sector centuries ago.” Elliot cocked his head, as if listening to a sound that only he could hear. “One of my experiments is nearing completion, Inquisitor, so if you will excuse me,” he snapped his fingers, and phased out of the room.
    >> Anonymous 06/04/11(Sat)16:48 No.15156727
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    56 KB
    >>15148861
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/04/11(Sat)16:48 No.15156731
    “It's not like I have a choice, do I?” Rightina turned to Zora and asked, “so where do you dig up fossils like him? And – you can't just put them straight to work on faith that they'll be loyal. How do you vet them?”

    Harald cleared his throat. “Actually, that's my field of expertise. If you're interested, I'll show you that tomorrow...”

    >Coming Soon: Chapter Seven: Returning to the Fold, where we see Apriori Internal Security and their efforts to treat and reform cultists, heretics, and mutants; we will meet Ardi, the Reasonable Daemonette, and learn what Harald does when he's not escorting visitors. Also, Chapter Eight: The Torch, where we meet the Knights Inductor themselves.

    >I may end up changing Elliot's character and motivation, depending on what the new Necron codex looks like.

    >U like? U mad? I can only improve by your feedback.
    >> Anonymous 06/04/11(Sat)16:51 No.15156749
    I like.

    I like A LOT.

    Knights Inductor are my new army
    >> Anonymous 06/04/11(Sat)16:55 No.15156788
    >>15156697
    >“I am one of, if not the last Necrontyr.”

    You DO realize that this is the point where even the most radical inquisitor stops talking, goes back to his/her ship, burns the planet to cinders from orbit, then blasts the cinders to powder, right? Only a handful of the most out-there Hereteks would tolerate a live Necrontyr, and even an Inquisitor Lord that let one walk free would be declared excommunicatae traitoris and hunted like a dog.
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/04/11(Sat)17:08 No.15156891
    >>15156788
    There was a line that I cut (and maybe should put back) that said, more or less, given that he has the know-how to call down a bunch of Necrons, and could do so faster than you could say "Exterminatus," and was willing to share some of his expertise, they might as well listen.

    Another character concept I've been kicking around (and maybe should consider more seriously) is that, rather than being stuck in a protoform, Elliot got uploaded into a non-networked computer system, which somewhat limits his ability to influence the outside world beyond talking to tech-priests.

    I could also re-order the story. Since Elliot isn't terribly important to this story, I could introduce him later (maybe after the Knights have some kind of throw-down with the Necrons and realize that they need somebody with insider information) with little ill effect.
    >> Anonymous 06/04/11(Sat)17:09 No.15156906
    >>15156788
    I'm with the other poster on this. While the Inquisitor makes a good plot device to explore the various areas of this chapter, I'd imagine the more reasonable approach would have been to conceal anything that smacked of ridiculous amounts of heresy, such as Elliot, at the very least. Not lying, but omitting mention.

    Either that or you're going to have to have an interesting twist on why the Inquisitor doesn't report these findings in full and let the Knights have it.
    >> Iron Lung 06/04/11(Sat)17:16 No.15156954
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    >>15148782
    Good!
    More!
    Good writing. Zora has a very clear, distinct voice and set of mannerisms. Same with her use of mechanicus cultural idioms.
    Can't wait for the next episode.
    >> Anonymous 06/04/11(Sat)17:18 No.15156976
    >>15156788
    Necrontyr aren't generally known about, if at all. A lot of Ordo Xenos inquisitors don't even know they existed, let alone that they turned into then Necrons
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/04/11(Sat)17:43 No.15157185
    >>15156906
    They tried the subtle approach (in the original Knights Inductor story: http://1d4chan.org/wiki/An_Investigation_into_the_Heresy_of_the_Reasonable_Marines), and all that it got them was that Rightina was left feeling suspicious, and as soon as she reported to the Inquisition, she got sent right back to do more investigations. Sooner or later, she'll figure out everything, so they figure it's best to let it all hang out and, once they're done, convince her that they know what they're doing, and that they're doing the right thing.

    Or maybe the Emperasque shows up and pronounces judgement on the sector, thus depriving Rightina of the chance to make her report. How's that for a Deus Ex Machina?

    >>15156954
    Honestly, all I did was have her speak without contractions. The rest sort of followed. And, have you read Chapter Six yet? You quoted the end of Chapter Five...

    >rereading chapter six
    It occurs to me that I entirely forgot to have Zora explain her "justification" for studying xenotechnology in the first place! Blast and botheration. I'll fix that, and I'll see if I can fix Elliot to fit a little better...Coming Soon: Chapter Six: Know Thy Enemy, Mk. II.
    >> Anonymous 06/04/11(Sat)17:45 No.15157211
    Can the Reasonable Marines talk some sense into Games Workshop's executives?
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/04/11(Sat)18:17 No.15157519
    >>15157211
    >The Reasonable Marines are fictitious
    >Games Workshop will never be Reasonable
    >sadfrog.jpg
    >> Anonymous 06/04/11(Sat)18:59 No.15157931
    Warhammer 40k is an awesome setting, but depressing. The Knights Inductor give me hope. Keep up the amazing work!
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/04/11(Sat)19:20 No.15158122
    Okay. Busily writing the ending of Chapter Six, should be up within the hour, but I've decided that, since the Necrons won't be making an appearance in this story, there's no reason to introduce Elliot, and since the Knights Inductor prefer to leave Necron Tombs alone or nuke them from orbit (it's the only way to be sure), there's no good way for them to have met him at all. I've got a story idea for introducing him later: some nosy Magi Explorator hear about this new Sector which has just appeared on the maps and seems to be of interest to the “Servants of the Omnissiah” (read: Necrons), and decide to poke around, which means the Knights Inductor have to clean up their mess, and thus meet the accidentally-awakened Elliot.
    >> Anonymous 06/04/11(Sat)19:25 No.15158158
    >>15157185
    >Or maybe the Emperasque shows up and pronounces judgement on the sector, thus depriving Rightina of the chance to make her report. How's that for a Deus Ex Machina?

    I would LOVE to see a fluff piece of The Deal Master and the Emprasque chatting.

    "Hey. Big guy. Whats with that decree about land raiders?"
    "What decree?"
    "The... one from the time of horus."
    "What about it! Speak quickly"
    "Its... still in effect, sire, the inquisition..."
    "OH FOR FUCKS SAKE FUCK DAMNED ADMINASTRATUS HAVE THEIR HEADS UP THEIR ARSES FOR THE WARMTH AND PLEASANT SCENT. THE SHORTAGE IS OVER. CARRY ON."
    "Thank you, milord."
    "... HOLD IT RIGHT THERE. I SMELL INNOVATION. WHAT KIND OF STUNT ARE YOU TRYING TO PULL. OUT WITH IT."

    Or something like that.
    And then the emprasque gets a tarrasque sized shotgun railgun to tote around.
    >> Iron Lung 06/04/11(Sat)20:43 No.15158800
    >>15157185
    I responded a bit quick.
    I've read 6. It's solid. Little light on Eldar for my tastes, but I'm cool with that.
    I liked the description of Elliot.
    >>he looked positively ancient, with skin as grey as ash. His face was gaunt, with long ears like an Eldar, but without their typical elegance, and it seemed to be fixed with a permanently dour expression. His body was thin and bowed, and he seemed to be so fragile that a gentle breeze would blow him away. In spite of his apparent frailty, his green, sunken eyes had an unnatural intensity; overall, he looked like a corpse which had animated itself out of spite. Everyone in the room took an involuntary step back"

    Bravo, +1 Internets!
    >> Iron Lung 06/04/11(Sat)20:45 No.15158819
    >>15158158
    >>And then the emprasque gets a tarrasque sized shotgun railgun to tote around.

    Rotating tri-barrel design to minimize recharge/cooldown time, maximize cyclical fire rate.

    And it's a got a bayonet.
    >> Anonymous 06/04/11(Sat)21:14 No.15159078
    >>15158819

    Phase bayonet.
    >> Anonymous 06/04/11(Sat)21:55 No.15159500
    >>15158819
    *chainsaw* Bayonet.
    >> Tales from the Aprior Sector: The Emperasque's Verdict Not LongPoster... 06/04/11(Sat)23:19 No.15160126
    The Knights Inductor stood assembled in the cavernous hangar underneath their fortress-monastery. Before them stood the Emperor Himself, in the form of the mighty Tarrasque daemon which He had summoned and possessed, there to pass judgment on the Knights and the Aprior Sector. Even the Silencers could feel the raw power embodied in Him, and everyone could sense that He was displeased.

    “INQUISITOR RIGHTINA'S REPORT WAS EXTREMELY THOROUGH, AND EXTREMELY DAMNING. YOU HAVE CONSORTED WITH XENOS, HERETICS, AND MUTANTS OF EVERY VARIETY, ENGAGED IN GROSS DEVIATIONS FROM THE STC CANON, INCLUDING THE STUDY OF XENOTECHNOLOGY, AND FLAGRANTLY VIOLATED THE SPIRIT AND LETTER OF THE CODEX ASTARTES. HONESTLY, ANY ONE OF THOSE OFFENCES WOULD BE ENOUGH TO DECLARE YOU TRAITORS AND HAVE THE WHOLE SECTOR PURGED. WHAT HAVE YOU TO SAY IN YOUR DEFENSE?”

    Chapter Master Zakis Randi stepped forward. “My liege, we –”
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/04/11(Sat)23:20 No.15160131
    He was interrupted by a clamor and clattering from under the hangar floor. Panels slid aside, revealing an elevator rising from the depths of the Torch. A fully enrobed Artisan, with a synthesized, vaguely Vostroyan or Valhallan voice, was swearing profusely over an oblong, enshrouded object, alternately pleading with and cajoling the machine spirit of whatever rested under the shroud. The Emperor's eyebrow-ridges rose in amusement at the sight, when the Artisan looked up, and saw Him for the first time.

    “Oh – Omnissiah preserve me – Chapter Master Randi, I had no idea – you never said He would be here!” Zora gasped, her eye-lights wide and round.

    “Just show him what your Workshop made,” Randi whispered gently.
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/04/11(Sat)23:21 No.15160137
    “Oh – the device – yes!” And with a flourish, Zora whipped the shroud aside, revealing a massive weapon that looked like it had come from a Titan. As she chattered about it, Zora's confidence buoyed, and her voice became stronger. “This, Your Eminence, is our Unity-pattern gravity-manipulation mass driver. It has three barrels, so that each one has time to cool between shots, allowing us a rate of fire of two hundred rounds per second, and an underslung chainsaw bayonet if the enemy gets too close. We originally designed it for Titans and super-heavy tanks, but we built this one with a stock and external trigger for you!”

    “IS IT BASED ON AN STC PATTERN?”

    “No, Your Eminence!” Zora declared proudly.

    “DOES IT CONTAIN REVERSE-ENGINEERED XENOTECHNOLOGY?”

    “Yes, Your Eminance! The barrels are based on Tau railguns for their heat-resistance, the projectiles are based on Eldar shuriken and Tyranid borer beetles for aerodynamics, adaptive armor-piercing ability, and limited homing capacity, the moving parts are painted red so that they go faster, and the chainsaw bayonet's blades are based on Necron phase technology for superior cutting power.”
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/04/11(Sat)23:22 No.15160147
    The Emperor stared dumbfounded at the weapon. “IS THERE ANYTHING OF HUMAN ORIGIN IN THIS MACHINE?”

    “The accelerators are based on knowledge we gained from our study of the STC canon, the chainsaw track is based on the treads from the Land Raider, it fits on a Titan, and it was human diplomacy and ingenuity which led to its creation – I guarantee, there is no other species in the galaxy which could have built this weapon.”

    The Emperor hefted the weapon, and raised it to His shoulder, sighting down the length, finally asking, “IS THERE ANY AMMUNITION?” Zora indicated a drum the size of a Crusader torso, which the Emperor took, and then vanished with a puff of purple smoke and a CRACK of displaced air. After the longest ten minutes of Randi's life, the Emperor reappeared, with a grin which stretched from ear to ear. “JUST TESTED IT IN THE EYE OF TERROR,” He explained. “LET'S JUST SAY...YOUR UNORTHODOXIES DO HAVE THEIR USES.”

    Randi took that as a good sign.

    >The End, perhaps?
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/04/11(Sat)23:23 No.15160152
    I hope this doesn't cause interest in my stories to wane – remember, it's not the destination that matters, it's the journey! I've still got many chapters to go before "Return of the Reasonable Marines" is finished.
    >> Iron Lung 06/04/11(Sat)23:41 No.15160276
    >>15160147
    >>15160137
    >>15160131
    >>15160126
    PROMOTIONS!

    >>15160152
    Werd! Much like, and thanks for the writery. Very good stuff.
    >> Anonymous 06/04/11(Sat)23:48 No.15160332
    >>15160147
    The Emperorasque, but not written by Someone Else?
    BLAPHEMY. COMPLETE AND UTTER BLASPHEMY!
    I'm dead serious, after I realized the ALL CAPS were the Emperorasque i started spasming in shock for about thirty seconds.

    I think I either have a problem, or obsess way too easily.
    >> Anonymous 06/05/11(Sun)00:02 No.15160425
    >living necrontyr

    Sorry, but this blows my suspension of disbelief. The Necrontyr were ancient before the Eldar even existed. Every last one of them was given a necrodermis body, either willingly or forcibly. Their lives were incredibly short.

    I mean, it's great writing, but I can't read it and accept it as 40k.
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/05/11(Sun)00:09 No.15160459
    >>15160332
    What do you mean? I am someone else (lowercase, of course).

    >>15160425
    His body is necrodermis. Obviously, I need to explain this better (Chapter Six is getting some revisions), but he uploaded his mind to a computer to wait until somebody switched it on. Then, he would warn them about the Necrons, C'tan, and so on.
    >> Anonymous 06/05/11(Sun)00:23 No.15160532
    >>15160425

    I'm the one that voiced original objections, and I'm with this guy. It's too over-the-top, even for 40k. You're taking the role of the Inquisition far too lightly.

    Y'know why so few people know of the Necrons? Because they tend to mind-wipe anyone who comes within a country mile of them and lives to tell about it, and the rest die. You ever see one particular scene from the Simpsons where Homer barges into Mr. Burns office, Burns has his finger over a silent call button for security under his desk, Homer says something that plays to his vanity so his finger starts moving away from the button, then he says something stupid and Burns jabs it as hard as he can 16 or 17 times? That's what would happen here, only the button is labeled "Exterminatus".

    Tech-heresy isn't black and white, it comes in shades. But tinkering with Necrontyr tech is dark grey, and a live Necrontyr is blackedy black black black. Any Inquisitor senior and knowledgeable enough to be sent to investigate Aprior in the first place would know what the Necron are. Everything up to that point, could possibly be explained away or dealt with through politicking within the Inquisition itself. But letting a sapient Necron (because they're not going to make the distinction) into an Imperium installation is instant grounds for BLAM!ing, and they'd purge the whole goddamn system if that's what it took to keep the Necrons away. You're in "no, really, I'm a FRIENDLY worshipper of Khorne" territory.
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/05/11(Sun)00:28 No.15160558
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    I can see that Elliot is the point that breaks suspension of disbelief for most, and I understand. Still, I really want a Reasonable Necron (or two, or...) to fill out the cast.

    Maybe I should wait until the new Necron codex comes out; with six special characters, and the C'tan being overthrown, I'm sure I'll find inspiration. Or, maybe, pic related.
    >> CHAPTER SIX: Know Thy Enemy (the part that I forgot) Not LongPoster... 06/05/11(Sun)00:32 No.15160580
    >This should have been in Chapter Six, but I somehow missed it; this is where we learn what the Apriori get out of studying xenotechnology.

    “So, Artisan, have you got any more novelties to show me? Abominable intelligences, perhaps?”

    Zora gasped. “Omnissiah, no, that would be dangerous!”

    “And consorting with xenos isn't? I can maybe understand your perspective on the Quest for Knowledge, but what good can come of studying xeno-technology?”
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/05/11(Sun)00:33 No.15160587
    Zora threw her hands up in the air. “I have shown you what we have accomplished by our variant Quest for Knowledge, and still you lack faith in us! Omnissiah, give me the strength to deal with this close-minded doubter!” With a frustrated wave of her hand, she directed a wall-screen to view a test chamber filled with two dozen plasma guns. Rightina recognized half of them, but not the others. Zora explained venomously, “those plasma rifles on the left are standard Mark Five Mars-pattern Plasma Guns, used by Imperial Guard regiments across the galaxy. Those on the right are prototype Mark Forty Aprior-pattern, used by our armed forces. Now watch.” The twenty-four plasma guns fired as one. Rightina glanced at Zora, but she was too focused on the guns to notice. The plasma guns fired again, and Rightina wondered what Zora had hoped to show her. On the third volley, half of the Mars-pattern guns exploded violently, while the Aprior-pattern guns fired normally. Zora's eye-lights were turned down in a glare as she waved to darken the video-feed. “Did you see that, Inquisitor? We have performed thousands of tests, and a plasma weapon has a one in six chance of exploding on any given shot – one in six! That is unacceptable – monstrous, even! Those miscalibrated Martian scrap-sacks dither and twiddle their mecha-dendrites while Guardsmen are being killed in legions by their own weapons because they are too short-sighted to consider that their vaunted STCs might have errors, or that they might have made mistakes in translation.”

    >orketun doesn't
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/05/11(Sun)00:34 No.15160596
    Rightina opened her mouth to speak, but Zora wouldn't have it. “Look at this list!” She waved her hand at the screen, and a long list of names scrolled up. “These are all of the Apriori Guardsmen and Planetary Defense Militiamen who died because of their plasma weapons – two thousand casualties per year. They say that half the Sector is related to at least one person on the list, and I am fortunate enough to be related to two of them. I swore that I would do everything within my power to end this state of affairs, and by the Omnissiah, we have done it. Two thousand casualties a year, down to zero. If being accused of xeno-heresy by small-minded, arrogant old waste processors is the price for such an accomplishment, then I gladly pay it! We study xenotechnology, but we are saving human lives!”

    Rightina had no answer.

    >that's it for this interlude.
    >> Anonymous 06/05/11(Sun)00:35 No.15160602
    >>15160558

    You're trying to shoehorn too much in. Look to the editing process for the Nightmares: a good idea can become a bad one, when you're cramming it in next to 87 already awesome ones. Making nice with daemons and cultists will be crazy enough.

    >Maybe I should wait until the new Necron codex comes out

    No. Just... no. Neckbeards fear change, loathe GW's retco-I mean REVISION process, and cling to old canon. You'll alienate more readership than you could ever hope to gain, and the underlying story won't benefit from it.
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/05/11(Sun)00:47 No.15160680
    >>15160602
    Okay, I hear you. As I've said, I realize that I'm not losing anything by cutting Elliot out; when I put Chapter Six up on 1d4chan, he won't be mentioned.

    Damn, but I loved describing him! I'll save it for a Necron Lord, or something.
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/05/11(Sun)01:29 No.15161038
    Shameless self bump before bedtime; if the thread is still alive tomorrow (~10 hours from now), I will answer questions or comments left overnight. Probably won't have Chapter Seven ready, but you never know.
    >> Iron Lung 06/05/11(Sun)04:01 No.15162213
    bupman
    >> Anonymous 06/05/11(Sun)10:23 No.15164486
    page 12? hell no?
    *BUMP*

    LIGHT UP THE NIGHT!
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/05/11(Sun)12:58 No.15165636
    Bump from page 9, I'm typing as fast as I can...
    >> Anonymous 06/05/11(Sun)13:10 No.15165716
    >>15165636
    Don't push yourself man. I'll enjoy Chapter 7 whenever it shows up :) We'll try and keep it bumped.
    >> Anonymous 06/05/11(Sun)14:23 No.15166225
    Bumping
    >> Iron Lung 06/05/11(Sun)14:58 No.15166509
    yet another proactive propulsion of this thread out of the basement for the sake of it's continuance.
    >> Anonymous 06/05/11(Sun)16:52 No.15167379
    Bumping again.
    >> Anonymous 06/05/11(Sun)17:38 No.15167691
    >>15160680

    Tarrasque Shotgun guy here.

    Well Done <3. I hope someone else sees this and uses it.

    Regarding elliot: I liked the character, and his description thereof. If anything, you introduced him too early.
    I find it MUCH more likely he'd be disguised as a servitor, and the Reasonable Marines just go HUM DE DUM DUM NO HERESY HERE SIR while elliot plays dumb and servile. THAT has potential for comedy and amusement, and I rather liked your earlier idea of waiting to expose him to the inquisition until after they've had a chance to see how they operate - get over the initial kneejerk shock reaction first, basically.
    And I am pretty darned shore the reasonable marines would be reasonable enough to tell elliot 'DONT GO AROUND BLABBING YOUR ALIEN ORIGINS TO STRANGERS'.

    I saw keep him. Just save it for later, and basically have 'cameo' appearances. After all, they need SOMEONE who can investigate the pariah gene.

    If you do end up cutting him out completely, I would agree that his -role- in the marines should stay, if filled by someone else. A jokaero, perhaps, would fit right in, or an -incredibly- bored Eldar Pathfinder(is it way of the outcast?) who's decided to hang out and pretend to be a 'diplomat' to the Reasonable Marines.
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/05/11(Sun)18:14 No.15167938
    >>15167691
    Hmm, I could see that working, especially if Rightina makes some kind of derogatory comment about "outdated technology" ("MUST...SUPPRESS...NECRONTYR...RAGE!" "Suppress what?" "Oh, nothing, just a bad vocoder.")

    I figure I'll sit on the idea a while -- I like him too, but I'd like to maintain suspension of disbelief. These chapters (5, 6, and later, 7 and 8) have a lot of scenes that need to take place, but may happen in just about any order; I may end up shuffling things around a bit before I consider it ready for 1d4chan.
    >> Mattmaster 06/05/11(Sun)18:36 No.15168109
    Bump, but don't make the emporer a dick
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/05/11(Sun)18:40 No.15168128
    Er, that short story aside, the Emperor's not appearing (and he was fair, wasn't he?).

    In other news, Chapter Seven is here!
    >> CHAPTER SEVEN: Returning to the Fold Not LongPoster... 06/05/11(Sun)18:41 No.15168135
    During Rightina's first visit to the Aprior Sector, Sergeant Sacres had been suspiciously evasive when he was asked about what the Apriori did with heretics and mutants. By this point in her tour, Rightina had seen that the Apriori seemed to have set out to break every rule in the book, which lead her to believe that, whatever the Apriori did with their heretics, it didn't involve Imperially-sanctioned procedures like cleansing and burning. This raised the question: what did they do instead?

    Whatever they did was done on the fifth moon of Aprior Sextus, chosen for its isolation; as the transit from Quartus to Sextus was too close for Warp travel to be economical, the journey had to be made via sublight drive, which took ten days. In the meantime, Rightina wracked her brain for what could possibly be done with heretics, and found herself at a loss for answers. Most of what she could imagine involved some kind of therapy – but that was impossible!

    Or was it? Before coming to the Sector, Rightina would have declared that it was impossible to cooperate with xenos, or safely and productively deviate from STC canon, but the Apriori had clearly done both of those...
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/05/11(Sun)18:42 No.15168139
    The Inquisition was a distributed, decentralized organization, but the headquarters of the Ordo Hereticus was nominally the Adepta Sororitas Convent Prioris, on Terra. The building held records, vaults, and training and living facilities, all decorated in the ostentatious Gothic style typical to Imperial government buildings.

    The headquarters of Apriori Internal Security, the Panopticon, was rather less ornamented – indeed, from its external appearance, Aprior Sextus Echo was unoccupied, because the headquarters was entirely underground. The shuttle had flown inside a deep trench, revealing a hangar set in one of the walls, which itself connected to the Panopticon. There, Harald scanned his palm-print and eyes, entered a pass-code, and scanned an implanted token, and the door irised open, revealing a labyrinthine office. Rather than festooning every surface with eagles, skulls, and =I='s, the Panopticon was visually sterile, with smooth surfaces colored a cool blue-green. “It's easy on the eyes, and keeps us from getting cabin fever,” Harald explained.

    Harald and Rightina soon came to a junction. “We do a lot here – surveillance, analysis, interrogation, and treatment and reform. What do you want to see?”

    So, the Apriori did try to treat heretics and mutants! The first three tasks were already familiar to her, but how did one reform a heretic? Rightina asked to see where and how it happened.
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/05/11(Sun)18:44 No.15168160
    “Broadly speaking, we deal with three kinds of people down here,” Harald explained. “We've got people with hereditary mutations – those are pretty easy to fix with some medical genetics, surgery, and physical therapy. With our screening programs, we can actually catch those mutations and prepare a treatment regimen before the person is born! It saves families a lot of time and heartbreak. Most of the time, we don't even see the mutant, since most planets have at least one medical center with the knowledge and equipment to help them, but we keep track of all of them here.”

    “Across the whole Sector?”

    “You bet! You've only seen the Aprior System, because there's not enough time to traipse around every world in the Sector, and since this system was colonized and pacified first, it's the pattern on which all the others are based. That said, each world is unique, and we have to keep tabs on things to make sure everybody sticks to the Charter. Each system has its own Internal Security branch, but they all report to us.”
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/05/11(Sun)18:45 No.15168169
    Eventually, Rightina and Harald came to a thick door, about the size of the door to the tech-priests' Reverse Engineering Department. “This is where we help former Chaos cultists. Just so you know, you may feel a sensation of buzzing or pressure in your head. This ward is psychically warded against the Warp, and those sensations are perfectly typical, but let me know if it gets too distracting, so we can leave,” Harald warned.

    For a brief moment, as soon they crossed the threshold, Rightina's head felt like it had been put in a vise, breathing became laborious, and her vision started to swim. Harald caught her on his arm before she could collapse to the floor, and started to take her back outside, but the feeling quickly passed. Gasping for breath, Rightina stood again. “That's one hell of a ward!”

    “Of course it is – we've got former cultists, Warp-tainted items, heretical texts, you name it. This place would call down every daemon in the Sector if we didn't keep it warded!”

    Rightina looked around, noticing that cells and isolation chambers lined the walls. “So, you actually treat heretics?”

    “We do our best,” Harald corrected. “Not everybody wants treatment, or responds well – with our current techniques, we can only heal a person's soul so much. There comes a point where it's more humane for us to kill them quickly and annihilate their soul, rather than keep them alive and in torment.”

    “And if people do respond? How well does it work? What do you do?”

    “Why don't you ask someone who's been through it? We've got a few reformed heretics who work here – to catch a thief, and all that.”
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/05/11(Sun)18:46 No.15168178
    Harald showed Rightina to a room somewhat larger than the other cells. A thin, nervous-looking young man lived inside. He seemed to have a constant tremor or twitch, which suddenly got worse when he saw Rightina.

    “A – an Inquisitor – here – but you said – I – you said –”

    “She's just here to understand, Gordon,” Harald reassured him. “You're not in any kind of trouble.” He glanced sharply at Rightina, his eyes sending a message: Do not antagonize him.

    Rightina nodded. “I just want to understand how things get done around here,” she told him.

    The man calmed down, with only his hands trembling slightly. “I – I'm Gordon. I work here as a counselor – to show people that it is possible to move past our – ah – histories.”

    “Do you mind if I ask...what brought you here?”

    Gordon inhaled deeply, and exhaled slowly. “I – don't like to think about it, but I – I made it through, right?” He swallowed nervously. “I used to be a servant of Tzeentch,” he finally admitted. “I was lost before then – unemployed, not enough money to get to college, didn't have the gumption to enlist – and it was comforting to be working for someone who seemed to have a plan.”
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/05/11(Sun)18:48 No.15168196
    “And then what?”

    Gordon laughed shakily. “We tried to summon a daemon, and we got busted. And – and they took us here, and with the isolation, I could feel clear-headed, and I – I remember wondering, 'what the hell was I thinking?' Because I had time to think about it – and they made sure that I thought about it – and I realized what I'd been doing – I mean, the summoning required a sacrifice – and I had just sat back and – and they c-cut him up –” Gordon couldn't make himself continue. “Any – anyway, that was when I decided that I needed to change things.”

    “Like that? Why then?”

    Harald interceded. “Chaos has a warping influence on the mind. People will do almost anything – it's like their reasoning faculties get shut off.”

    Gordon nodded. “I remember feeling like I wasn't really there – I knew, on some level, what was going on, but that it didn't matter somehow.”

    “Part of the reason for the wards is that it keeps that influence out, and part of our counseling is to make people think about what they did, and recognize that their actions and their drives are in conflict – 'provoking dissonance,' they call it.”
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/05/11(Sun)18:49 No.15168206
    “Yeah – and then, once you get to that point, the program is pretty much detox for the soul. Drain the taint out of it, get people healed up inside.”

    “And how well does that work?”

    Gordon held out his trembling hand. “Results are mixed, obviously. I was pretty good at tennis in high school, and – not anymore. Small price to pay, comparatively speaking.”

    “Some people never fully recover – their souls are always 'marked' somehow, such that if they leave the warded area, they're targets for daemonic possession. We figured that out the hard way, and we haven't got a way to detect it without exposing people to the Warp unprotected, so until we crack that problem, everyone we treat has to stay in a warded zone for the rest of their lives.”

    Gordon shrugged. “That's not too bad a fate, if you ask me – better than being daemon lunch, and at least I can be part of the solution here.”
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/05/11(Sun)18:51 No.15168226
    Gordon's work shift was about to start, so they left him to minister to his patients. “So, if your tech-priests employ xenos, do you also employ daemons, by chance?” Rightina asked sarcastically.

    “Daemon. Singular.”

    Rightina stopped and stared. “I was only – you're serious!”

    “Of course I'm serious! Although, the terms of employment are pretty short – she helps us as she can, and we don't annihilate her.”

    “And she just goes along with this?”

    “Pretty much. How much do you know about daemons?”

    “Beyond how to kill them? Not much.”

    “Well, they're basically constructs of pure emotion. Usually, that means blood-lust, or deviousness, that sort of thing, but this one got built out of compassion.”
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/05/11(Sun)18:53 No.15168241
    “That leaves the question of why anyone would summon a daemonette of compassion – and frankly, how they even exist! I've never heard of a daemonette that runs around giving people comforting hugs, or whatever it is that they would do.”

    “The Warp is influenced by all emotions, Rightina, even the positive ones. As for how she got summoned, her cult wasn't asking for any daemonette in particular, they just grabbed the closest one. She realized that the cult was hurting people, so she contacted us.” Harald chuckled. “Usually, summoned daemons don't blow the whistle on their own cults, but Ardi did.”

    “Ardi?”

    “We needed to call her something, and her name is unpronounceable by human tongues, so we designated her 'Reasonable Daemonette,' and then somebody abbreviated that to 'R.D.,' and the name stuck.”

    “And how does it help you?”

    “She,” Harald emphasized the pronoun, “has personal experience with the Warp and with cults, which helps our research efforts immensely. We also have several items which are dangerous for humans to handle, but harmless to daemons.”

    Eventually, they came to Ardi's door. Harald knocked and called, “Ardi, it's Harald, and a visitor. May we come in?” There was a clamor of shuffling furniture, slamming books, and locking boxes. “We need to give her time to put away anything that could be dangerous to us,” he explained.

    After about a minute, Ardi called, “Come in!”
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/05/11(Sun)18:54 No.15168246
    Rightina had seen every sort of Slaaneshi beast and ritual known to the Imperium, and had been entirely successful in holding on to her soul. In spite of all of her experience, she was utterly unprepared to meet a fully clothed daemonette – conservatively dressed, no less! She (this daemonette had chosen a more female figure, rather than the typical androgynous form) wore formal business attire, with a pair of thick-framed glasses perched on her nose. Her hair-tentacles, rather than flying wildly around her head, were gathered in a tight ponytail. If not for her obvious bodily mutations, she would not have looked out-of-place at a formal dinner. Rightina took some small comfort from the fact that Ardi looked just as shocked to see her.

    Harald hastily introduced the two. “Ardi, this is Inquisitor Rightina Immam, of the Ordo Hereticus. She's here to catalogue our...unique policies and report them to her Panel. Rightina, this is Ardi, hazardous materials investigator and public defender.”

    Ardi blinked. “I've only been summoned twice before this last time, but I got the feeling that working with a daemon was pretty unique.”

    Rightina sighed. “Honestly, with everything else I've seen, it's not like they can fall any further. So, what do they get out of you?”

    Ardi pointed to the bookshelves behind her. “You see those books? They don't react well when humans read them. They might possess you, or scramble your mind, or send you into the Warp, but not me. Same idea for those storage bins on the other wall – those artifacts don't play nice with humans, but I can use them without too much danger.”
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/05/11(Sun)18:58 No.15168276
    “And they don't burn it all, because...?”

    Ardi gasped. “You don't just burn Warp-tainted stuff! What if there's a daemon bound inside? That's what most of the possession artifacts do; there's a daemon bound inside, and if a human touches it, or burns it, or says the right phrase, or what have you, the daemon gets out! That's why they keep me around: I can help them contain these things.”

    Harald interjected, “some bindings require extremely expensive components – tears of a virgin shed in the month of June come to mind – and some are mutually contradictory. Ardi is invaluable to us, because with her assistance, we can bind each artifact with exactly what it needs, and no more.”

    “And do they 'sandbox' you, like the xenos?”

    “Yes, with the warding. I can't teleport, shape-shift, escape to the Warp, nothing. I'm just about powerless here, and honestly, with the prevalence of the Blank gene, this sector is probably the worst place for a daemon to be.”

    At least the Apriori weren't leaving themselves entirely open to corruption – Aprior Sextus Echo was as far from the centers of government as could be. “And does that hurt? Why put up with the warding for – forever?”

    Ardi shuffled her foot as she thought, digging three parallel scratches into the floor. “This lets me help them, and it lets them be sure that, if I'm lying to them, the harm that I can do is minimized. I – I can't help helping people, it's just who I am, and if I couldn't – I don't know what I'd do! I might as well ask why you keep – inquisiting. It's just what you do, isn't it?”
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/05/11(Sun)19:03 No.15168309
    Rightina wasn't sure that she liked being compared to a daemonette, but, unbidden, she wondered briefly what it must be like to be a daemon, driven solely by a single emotion, and unable to feel anything else. Maybe the negative emotions were more highly represented because it was easy to follow them? To feel compassion for any and every being, no matter how hostile or untrusting, must be incredibly painful.



    Their visit with Ardi was interrupted by a new batch of heretical texts arriving – contraband from a pirate trader – so Rightina and Harald left her to seal the room and get to work.

    “You said there were three kinds of people here, Harald. Mutants, Chaos cultists, and...?”

    “Xenos. That's actually where I usually work – so we won't have to interrupt anybody to ask questions!”

    “So, you employ xenos here, too?”

    “Not really – we're mostly vetters. If the Armed Forces capture some infiltrators, or find some alleged defectors, or what have you, they come to us, and we decide what to do, depending on the species. Tau get their olfactory control node severed, for example, and then we go from there.”

    “What do you deal with, for the most part?”

    “We're on the Eastern Fringe, so we mostly get Tau and Tyranids.”

    “Do you try to heal Genestealer Hybrids, too?”

    Harald stopped suddenly, with a look of sorrow. “We try,” he finally whispered. “This way.”
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/05/11(Sun)19:09 No.15168356
    After passing into another warded zone, Harald and Rightina came to a hallway lined with isolation cells. Inside, hybrids of varying degrees of humanity lay on beds, hooked up to intravenous feeding and medicine lines. The ones whose eyes were open had a vacant, thousand-yard stare, as if they were asleep or lobotomized.

    As Rightina and Harald passed one of the rooms, the occupant suddenly became animated; her body was entirely human, although her eyes were still eerily empty. “Madam,” the woman called, “please tell me, have you seen my child?” Rightina had scarcely managed to answer in the negative before the woman continued, “she's such a beautiful child, she means the world to me! Only, they tell me she's sick. They took her from me. But she will return! She's smart, and strong, and she will find me, no matter how far away she is...” The woman's gaze sank to the ground as her voice trailed off, and Rightina was left speechless.

    She turned to Harald. “What was that –”

    The woman looked up, and seemed to notice Rightina again. “Madam, please tell me, have you seen my child?” Harald gently took Rightina's arm, and they left the woman to talk to the air about her child.
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/05/11(Sun)19:11 No.15168369
    “She's been infected by a Genestealer,” Harald explained. “She was a passenger on a ship from a planet which, we learned later, was home to a Genestealer cult. The trip here was long enough for the infection to fully corrupt her, and if we hadn't caught her in the Customs screening, she would almost certainly have founded a cult here – she was actually pregnant when she arrived.” He shook his head sadly. “Genestealer infectees are the most depressing to work with, because they still think and feel, but their will is drained from them. You noticed her eyes?” Rightina nodded. “Her hybrid child is literally the only thing she thinks about – the infection has robbed her of every other motivation. If this facility weren't warded against psychic activity, she and her child would detect each other and they would do everything within their power to get back together; until then, that woman has no other drives.”

    “So, why hasn't anyone else asked me about their children?” Rightina wondered.

    “Maybe they're asleep, or childless – about a decade ago, we busted a big cult on Tarquin Dorsus, where a lot of hybrids were apparently solely used as soldiers. Without a cult network to guide them, they don't do anything – they won't even feed themselves, which is why we have them hooked up to IVs.”

    Rightina fell silent as she pondered the progression of a Genestealer infectee. Did the mind ever become aware of the subversion and fight it? Could the mind be aided by medicine? She asked Harald if such a thing was possible.
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/05/11(Sun)19:13 No.15168382
    “We're engaging with Draco to try and answer that question. At the moment, we can reverse the genetic changes with a counter-retrovirus, but that won't restore a person's mind.”

    Rightina stopped short. “And Draco's a code-name for a something which will, undoubtedly, set the bar even lower for the sector?”

    “...Yes,” Harald admitted. “It's a Hive Fleet.”

    “You realize that you're at the point where nothing surprises me, right? This is not a good place to be.”

    “If we're going to work together, we'll have to trust each other. You're all alone in the sector, and utterly powerless – it's not like any of our ships will commence an Exterminatus on their own homes – so that means we have to be fully open with you in return.”

    “Wait – who said anything about working together?”

    “We're back in communication with the Imperium, right? We need to make things fit together, and that means that Aprior Internal Security needs to liaise with the Inquisition, and that starts with you and me.”

    “And you're not willing to consider, I don't know, purging the taint from the Sector to make things fit?”

    “I'm afraid we're too far down the path to consider that, Rightina, and frankly, if our strategic prognostications are any indication, it's the Imperium that will have to change – as a matter of survival.”
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/05/11(Sun)19:16 No.15168402
    Harald led Rightina to a briefing room; gesturing for Rightina to take a seat at the conference table, he pulled up a star map on the holo-projector. “This is our subsector,” he explained. “We're here.” A red dot appeared over Aprior Sextus Echo. “And this is Hive Fleet Draco, or what's left of it.” The view changed to a nearby star, Tarquin. The star had two planets, exactly sixty degrees apart from each other. The one in the 'front,' designated Tarquin Ventrus, was dead, and had a Tyranid hive ship orbiting it. Further out, a small fleet stood vigil; Rightina recognized a Knights Inductor Strike Cruiser and two Gladius Rapid Strike Vessels. “A century back, we failed to stop a Genestealer Cult from taking root on Tarquin Ventrus, and it called down the Tyranids. We evacuated the inhabitants and prepared an Exterminatus, and then...they stopped. The Tyranids in orbit and on the ground just laid down and died of starvation, except for the central Hive Ship. We conducted a genetic analysis, and it seems that they consumed the Blank gene, and spliced it into themselves, cutting themselves off from the Hive Mind.”

    Rightina blinked. “So what did they do after that?”

    “Nothing! Without the driving hunger, the Synapse creatures had no motivation, and so the creatures under their control didn't do anything, either. Our Librarians tell us that only the Norn Queen herself is still alive, and that she's getting smarter by the day, now that the hunger isn't stifling her. Communication is difficult – frankly, we're still dealing with an alien mindset – but we think she's not hostile; just in case, we've got our fleet watching.”

    “And you think...she...may have a way to reverse the Genestealer infection?”
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/05/11(Sun)19:20 No.15168433
    “There may be a way for her to override the Brood Mind, and restore the minds of the infected. At least, we hope she can – our Librarians and Silencers have been unable to disentangle the original personality from the Brood Mind.”

    Rightina recalled her conversation with Underminer. “Any other xenos lurking in the sector? An Ork Waaagh, perhaps? Underminer mentioned a 'Kaptin Feegul.'”

    “Not a Waaagh, per se, but Kaptin Feegul does have a sizable crew under his command. Stormboys and Kommandos, mostly; it seems he's convinced that, if he can protect us long enough, we'll grow to be big and strong like his Orks are, and then he'll have a good time fighting us.”

    “And how long has this gone on?”

    “Fifty years, at least. He doesn't seem to have noticed that we aren't getting any bigger, or if he has, he doesn't care. I mean, look at it from his perspective: out here on the Fringe, there's a lot of bigger, nastier things for an Ork to fight than humans.”

    “I guess Orks aren't known for their subterfuge; but Eldar? Underminer mentioned them, too.”
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/05/11(Sun)19:22 No.15168459
    “You're not with the Ordo Xenos, so I don't know how much you know about Eldar, but some of them basically abandoned all of their advanced technology, preferring to live simpler lives – that's how they avoid the temptations of falling to Chaos. They call themselves 'Exodites,' and there's a colony of them in the Lida system.” The star map's focus changed, highlighting the Eldar colony. “Imperial records suggest that these colonies, and especially Craftworld Eldar, react violently to interference; while we were settling the Sector, we didn't have the manpower to contest them directly, so we left them a wide berth. Then, about eighty years ago, we detected a Slaaneshi Inferno-class cruiser on a direct course to the Lida system – Ardi informed us that Slaanesh is particularly partial to Eldar souls, so there was little doubt to their intentions. We computed that the Eldar would take significant losses, including many souls lost to Slaanesh, so we sent a Silencer force after the cruiser. Between a preliminary barrage to damage the cruiser en route, and lightning assaults on planetside summoning sites, we and the Eldar were able to annihilate them with no losses.”

    “And what did that get you?”
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/05/11(Sun)19:26 No.15168488
    “They told us that they were expecting losses upwards of 30 percent; it seems that Silencers are invisible to prognostication, so our assistance was totally unexpected. This in and of itself is a great boon: knowing that we have a totally unpredictable strike force is a great deal of leverage over the Eldar, and being responsible for saving thousands of Eldar lives – which we could easily have allowed to perish – is more leverage. They promised that, should any of their Craftworld cousins get the wrong idea over what we did, they would intercede to try and stop war from breaking out, and their younger leaders have expressed some interest in further cooperation, such as technology exchange – it will take time for the colony's opinions to change, but I think we're headed in the right –”

    Rightina interrupted Harald. “Hang on. You've used the word 'prognostication' twice now. Is that important?”

    Harald hemmed and hawed for a moment. “I don't know. Maybe. You see, the Eldar have one great advantage over us, and that is their ability to see the future – or possible futures, at any rate. So, they offered to scry for us. Bear in mind, we have no way of knowing that they are telling us what they really saw, and that our Silencers, and anyone with the Blank gene, for that matter, cannot be scried in any way, and so may exert any number of unpredictable influences on the future, so their predictions are...highly speculative, at best. That said, they told us that we – which may be the Aprior Sector, or the Imperium, they were not clear when they told us, and may not know themselves – would not be able to stand alone against the coming threats. We would have to stand with the Eldar, and maybe the Tau, in order to survive in the long run.”
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/05/11(Sun)19:31 No.15168518
    Rightina scratched her head. “That sounds awfully convenient for the Eldar with whom we would – hypothetically – be cooperating.”

    “Very true! But it would be convenient for us, too. And, frankly, the Tyranids and Necrons are coming in ever-growing numbers, and Chaos isn't getting any weaker, either – we will need all the allies we can get.”

    “So, if, hypothetically, you decided that you had to work with the Eldar, would you, Aprior Internal Security, be the ones to get the deal hammered out?”

    “Oh, no! We're investigators, not diplomats. If you want diplomacy, you'll have to talk with the Knights Inductor and the Order of Reason's Light.”

    >Coming soon: Chapter Eight: The Torch, in which we meet the Knights Inductor (including Ryan, the Silencer) and the Sisters of the order of Reason's Light (including Sister Silmarwen).

    >U like? U mad? I can only improve by your feedback

    >So, I may end up putting the Orks and Eldar back in Chapter Six (shortly after talking with Underminer), in which case Rightina will learn about Kaptin Feegul and the Eldar of Lida then; also, debating how and when and where to introduce Elliot, if at all.
    >> Anonymous 06/05/11(Sun)19:35 No.15168554
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    >>15168488

    This is fuckin gold-plated win, OP! Gogogo!
    >> Anonymous 06/05/11(Sun)19:41 No.15168611
    >>15168518

    Elliot should be seen rarely, if at all.

    ...right up until the sector is asshole-deep in 'crons. Then the possessed servitor starts with the throat-clearing and such.
    >> Anonymous 06/05/11(Sun)19:41 No.15168621
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    >>15168518
    This is so full of win.
    >> Anonymous 06/05/11(Sun)19:52 No.15168709
    Captain, we're detecting large amounts of win in this sector.
    >> Anonymous 06/05/11(Sun)19:55 No.15168733
         File1307318130.jpg-(141 KB, 1440x900, 126876775083.jpg)
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    >>15168709
    almost... heretical amounts!
    >> Anonymous 06/05/11(Sun)19:58 No.15168758
    >>15168611

    "*ahem* I see you're trying to stop a Tomb Fleet. Can I help you with that?'
    "GAH! FLYING FUCKSTICK WHERE THE HELL DID YOU COME FROM."

    Few words: Looted Destroyer, captain feegul's hoverboard/bike..

    capcha: liholiho uldiee.
    Servitor laughter, perhaps?

    But yeah. This is excellent. I LOVE how its actually a social fiction, with people acting reasonbly within their beliefs in a completely unreasonable universe - without being grimderp.
    Also, i want to know what's up with Harald's backstory with the tyranids.
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/05/11(Sun)20:10 No.15168851
    >>15168758
    What do you mean? He's dealt with Genestealers (both in flushing out cults and trying to treat infectees), but he doesn't have any sort of special connection.
    >> Anonymous 06/05/11(Sun)20:17 No.15168916
    >>15168851

    Reading the post, and his lengthly pause, his sorrowful delivery, i -almost- expected for him to have family that fell to a genestealer cult.
    They're one of the first patients of the facility, and the core of his motivation to do what he does is to help them.
    There's more than one way to win an inquisitor over.
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/05/11(Sun)20:29 No.15169004
    >>15168916
    I had initially figured his pause was him feeling bad for all of the Genestealer infectees who can't be helped (there are quite a few), especially when the Apriori are so successful (relatively) at helping heretics. I guess he could have a relative in the ward, but Zora already has the "dead relatives" thing.

    Maybe I could clarify that -- have Rightina ask him why he's willing to work with a Hive Fleet, and have him answer "because my [relative] is there," or "wouldn't you want to help them, too?" depending on which way I end up deciding. Or maybe it's better to leave it ambiguous! I guess the latter answer would work well for any case.
    >> Anonymous 06/05/11(Sun)20:34 No.15169046
    >>15168758
    >>15168758
    >>15168758

    THAT is exactly what I was envisioning, actually. Elliot-as-MSWord Paper-clipping his way through introductions. Nothing will get you past an awkward round of introductions like being of great utility during a crisis.

    >>15168916

    It sounded to me like he gives a fuck about his job and by that trait, empathizes for the suffering of those he cannot save. There's probably some professional frustration there as well; he probably KNOWS that there's a way to help them, if only he could find it!

    >Tramis plant

    I'll make a note of that, captcha. I think I'll send my D&D party on a quest to find some....whatever it is.
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/05/11(Sun)21:04 No.15169261
    >>15169046
    "I feel strongly, Inquisitor, because, in a world where Humans and Xenos can coexist -- and even cooperate -- and heretics can be healed, and entirely new technologies can be created from nothing, I am utterly powerless to help these people! They have had everything taken away from them, and I will not rest -- I CAN not rest, until their lives are restored."
    >> Anonymous 06/05/11(Sun)22:07 No.15169796
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    >>15169261

    Exactly. Combining the best aspects of intellectualism and faith; a professional who for whom zeal and logic are inseparable.

    picture..well, okay. Not so related.
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/05/11(Sun)22:34 No.15170057
    >>15169796 Wowzers! That's extra heretical! Go Go Gadget BLAM-pistol! (helicopter blades pop out)

    >insting ELLIOTT.

    Er, no Captcha, Elliot's name only has one "T" in it, and I'm not sure what you are trying to do to him...
    >> Anonymous 06/05/11(Sun)22:38 No.15170091
    >>15170057

    >copying ELLIOT.EXE
    ...done.
    >Run ELLIOT
    >> Tales from the Aprior Sector: Training Day Not LongPoster... 06/05/11(Sun)23:49 No.15170795
    >Still working on Chapter Eight: The Torch, but here's a short story starring Shhh! Feegul

    Kaptin Feegul generally liked his job. Humies never seemed to grow big enough to fight properly, but until they did, he would stand between them and the big nasties of the universe, and this “Aprior Sector” never seemed short of big nasties – from buggy Tyranid boys, to metal Necron boys, to spiky Chaos boys, there was always plenty for an Ork to do.

    Still, there were some unpleasant duties which every Warboss had to face, sooner or later, like Deff, and paying Teef to your Bigger Boss, and, most frustrating of all, breaking in the new Boys. It seemed that, wherever his Shhh! went, there were more Orks willing to join him, and, somehow, he had to mold them to fit in.

    And the most frustrating task of all was drilling. Orks had genetic memories of how to fight and build, but they had no idea of how to move or sneak around – that had to be taught.
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/05/11(Sun)23:50 No.15170807
    Feegul surveyed the assembled Boys; every one of them eager to fight, but without discip – dissap – doing what he told them, his force would be worse than useless. “DETAIL!” he bellowed, “LEFT FACE!” And sure enough, no two boys faced the same direction when they were done. “NAW, YA GITZ – YER UVVER LEFT!” That didn't help matters – Orks had no instinct for “left” and “right,” it seemed, so he had to beat it into them. This was complicated by the fact that, sometimes, he got them mixed up himself, which meant that some of his Boys knew them one way, and the others had them the other way, and all of them were firmly convinced that they were right.

    Finally, in desperation, he howled, “DETAIL! FACE DIS WAY!” And, by Gork and Mork, they did! They knew it – right out of the ground! Feegul was overjoyed. “DETAIL! FACE DAT WAY!” And they all turned back to face him – exactly the same angle and direction. Indeed, if he were asked, he would be unable to define “dis way” and “dat way,” but he somehow knew which way they ought to go – and apparently, so did his Boys! Of course, this raised the question of how he got them turned around. Perhaps...“DETAIL! FACE DA UVVER WAY!” Sure enough, he found himself facing three dozen Ork backsides.

    Perhaps training the new Boys would be more enjoyable from now on.

    >The End
    >> Anonymous 06/05/11(Sun)23:55 No.15170861
    >>15170807

    Oh shit. An ork "Shhh!"? The green tide becomes Da green shadow? Ork ninja? wtfbbq!
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/06/11(Mon)00:02 No.15170931
    >>15170861
    "Da Green Shaddo"...I like the sound of that! That's a good name for their warband (if you can call them that).

    They're mostly Stormboyz and Kommandoz, so their repertoire revolves around aerial assault and stealth, both of which nicely fit the name "shadow" (literal or figurative, respectively).

    >Hellicke local
    >I don't even...
    >> Anonymous 06/06/11(Mon)00:12 No.15171020
    We've gone completely Mary Sue levels of canon breaking, but I don't care any more, its just so good.
    >> Anonymous 06/06/11(Mon)00:13 No.15171028
    >>15170931
    And thousands of stormboyz will blot out the sky...
    >> Anonymous 06/06/11(Mon)00:26 No.15171154
    >>15170931
    GREAT. Now I've gotta start translating Orky job titles into ninja-clan equivalents and then I've gotta make those titles sound Orky!

    >"RIGHT...DA SCHO-GUN WANTS YOUSE TA CREEP ALL SNEAKY-LIKE OVA DEM WALLS AND SMASH UP DEM 'EFFERIALZ AN' WOT. REMEMBAH TA DO IT SNEAKY, OR YOUSE LOOSE 'ONNER!"

    >>15171020
    A dehydrated man dreams of torrential downpours and floods; A neckbeard languishing in grimdark dreams of lightheartedness and reason.
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/06/11(Mon)00:33 No.15171209
    One last shameless self bump before bed; if this thread is still alive tomorrow (about 10 hours from now), I'll answer questions and comments left overnight. In addition, I will most likely have Chapter Eight: The Torch sometime tomorrow.

    >>15171154
    Omnissiah damn it, I'm going to be dreaming of Orky koans all night long!

    "If ya haz teef, Oi'll give ya sum; if ya hazn't got any teef, Oi'll take 'em away."

    "Two choppas chop and dere's a sound; wot'z da sound of one choppa?"
    >> Anonymous 06/06/11(Mon)00:35 No.15171229
    >>15168518
    >So, I may end up putting the Orks and Eldar back in Chapter Six (shortly after talking with Underminer), in which case Rightina will learn about Kaptin Feegul and the Eldar of Lida then; also, debating how and when and where to introduce Elliot, if at all.

    I'm going to say no on squeezing it all in. You've got a lot of races being introduced as friendly too fast. Take your time and bring them out bit by bit. Build up to it.
    >> Taffer 06/06/11(Mon)03:32 No.15172515
    Rump-a dump bump
    >> Anonymous 06/06/11(Mon)04:05 No.15172719
    so far so good with the story!
    >> Anonymous 06/06/11(Mon)07:25 No.15173809
         File1307359545.jpg-(80 KB, 691x720, meanwhile, in new zeland.jpg)
    80 KB
    Bumping
    >> Anonymous 06/06/11(Mon)07:55 No.15173952
    >>15173809
    I don't get it.

    Also, bump.
    >> Anonymous 06/06/11(Mon)07:57 No.15173967
    >>15173809
    >not were sheep
    >> Anonymous 06/06/11(Mon)07:58 No.15173971
         File1307361534.jpg-(27 KB, 500x342, Meanwhile-in-Germany.jpg)
    27 KB
    >>15173809
    >> Anonymous 06/06/11(Mon)09:46 No.15174539
         File1307367989.gif-(517 KB, 115x86, 1306021292953.gif)
    517 KB
    >>15171154
    >SCHO-GUN
    >> Anonymous 06/06/11(Mon)09:51 No.15174558
    >>15171154
    SHouldn't that be "Show-Gun"?
    >> Anonymous 06/06/11(Mon)11:52 No.15175288
    saving from page 7.
    *BUMP*
    Light up the night!
    >> Anonymous 06/06/11(Mon)12:43 No.15175593
         File1307378592.jpg-(52 KB, 494x355, Reasonable_marine.jpg)
    52 KB
    bumpin up from page 4
    >> Anonymous 06/06/11(Mon)13:35 No.15175956
         File1307381727.gif-(1.89 MB, 280x210, wtf.gif)
    1.89 MB
    LIGHT UP THE NIGHT. (Bumpan)
    >> Anonymous 06/06/11(Mon)13:38 No.15175986
         File1307381911.jpg-(294 KB, 800x600, 1303344827784.jpg)
    294 KB
    Reasonable bump. Oh, and I EXPECT the Apriori Sector to have something like this in the end.
    >> Anonymous 06/06/11(Mon)13:43 No.15176025
    >>15175956
    reference to the Protomen?
    >> Anonymous 06/06/11(Mon)13:46 No.15176045
         File1307382378.png-(186 KB, 409x324, 2011-06-06_134525.png)
    186 KB
    >>15175986
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/06/11(Mon)14:02 No.15176125
    >>15176025
    Knights Inductor battle cry.

    Which was inspired by the Protomen -- I figured that it fit their character.

    "Maybe, you and I...we can bring back the light."
    >> Anonymous 06/06/11(Mon)14:05 No.15176144
    >>15176125
    Great song to bas a battlecry off of.

    good to see you back in here, Not LongPoster
    >> Anonymous 06/06/11(Mon)14:57 No.15176463
    >>15171154
    +
    >>15170861
    +
    >>15170795
    + Reasonable marines.

    "We have altered the terms of your genetic memory. You should now be significantly sneakier. Pray we do not alter it any further..."
    >> Anonymous 06/06/11(Mon)15:48 No.15176856
    Light up the night!
    *bump from page 6*
    >> Anonymous 06/06/11(Mon)16:06 No.15177035
    I MUST BUMP THIS THREAD
    >> Anonymous 06/06/11(Mon)17:45 No.15177859
    >>15148565
    >>15148576

    like teh Starship Troopers (novel) reference
    >> Anonymous 06/06/11(Mon)17:58 No.15177951
    Bumpan'
    >> Anonymous 06/06/11(Mon)18:18 No.15178100
         File1307398711.jpg-(154 KB, 806x614, MOAR.jpg)
    154 KB
    I mad cuz MOAR!
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/06/11(Mon)19:08 No.15178522
    >>15177859
    Er, I've never read the book (although I do recall "Marauder" referring to a Heinlein-esque suit of power armor, now that you mention it)

    >>15178100
    Sorry! I'm writing Chapter Eight, but I've got this idea for a short story (basically, the story of Lida) that won't let me go until I get something written down.
    >> Anonymous 06/06/11(Mon)19:23 No.15178648
    >>15178522
    it's worth the read because a lot of modern American military policy borrows from the book
    >> Anonymous 06/06/11(Mon)20:05 No.15179028
    >>15178522

    POST

    Also, bumpan!
    >> Anonymous 06/06/11(Mon)20:53 No.15179425
    I like the 'save Elliot for later' idea

    also, bump
    >> Anonymous 06/06/11(Mon)21:15 No.15179612
    >>15178522
    You have no reason to apologize, you are doing your best, that doesn't stop me from being angry, I'm just mad because I don't have future space-vision, and can't see where this excellent piece of literature is headed. Take your time and do it well, I'm a big boy, I am willing to wait if it's really good.
    >> Anonymous 06/06/11(Mon)21:34 No.15179823
         File1307410459.jpg-(865 KB, 2000x1283, c675a2b67c00435efe0ffda143ff25(...).jpg)
    865 KB
    >>15168226
    >>15168241
    >>15168246
    >>15168276
    >>15168309

    This story somehow jumped the shark with Ardi. Maybe it would have been a little more "canonic" if the inquisitor tried (and failed) to eliminate such an heresy on sight ? It could be an occasion to make a comical situation out of it. That would help introducing your most over-the-top characters without breaking too much the suspension of disbelief, if you see what I mean. Same goes for your necrontyr - and I like that guy very much. You should also keep him in this story.

    B-But, it's... It's not like I'm in love with Ardi, or something ! Cause that would be... Well... Extra heretical... You know ?
    >> Anonymous 06/06/11(Mon)21:49 No.15179970
    Shotgun guy back again. Good stuff, keep it up.

    >>15179823

    I kind of have to agree.

    However, with the *inquisition* taking notice, ALL bets are off, and they have to justify everything they do.
    Attempting to hide shit is even more likely to cause Blamming to occur.
    I think the current approach is a very Reasonable approach to 'prove you're not heretics, or ELSE'.

    However:

    Showing just how *serious* the inquisition is couldn't hurt, either. Perhaps have the stormtrooper attachment that came with the inquisitor poking around, or some acolytes dispatched to talk to the populace, conduct interviews(an excersize in spotting and reporting heresy), and have everyone going WAIT WHAT THATS NOT HOW IT WORKS when Incidents occur. I should probably remind you that Rightina is likely a psyker, and thus sensitive to warp disturbances, daemons, and human bullshit like lies.

    Also:
    >>15179612
    I think this guy's main complaint is that, currently, the way its reading is the story is kind of a parade of heresy, in that its all being shown first - kind of like how a couple other users keep saying Keep Elliot, Save Him For Later.

    I like it, and want more. I'm not suggesting you change anything, but you wanted feedback.

    I can't speak on what you have planned already, but I think it would be interesting to see how they deal with the inquisitors breaking point for heresy, defuse it, and eventally show her the even WORSE things they do that are entirely justified.

    But yeah. Don't let the haters get you down. I think everyone loves the characters and setting - show em off! Don't lose confidence!
    >> Anonymous 06/06/11(Mon)21:54 No.15180012
    >>15179970

    Agreed on pretty much all accounts, but I weep for the Storm Troopers when they take things a step too "typical" (read: murderously zealous) for loyal Imperial soldiers.
    >> Anonymous 06/06/11(Mon)21:56 No.15180038
    >>15179823
    Perhaps related. Found this in the other thread.

    images/1307412502867.png
    Ardi?
    >> Anonymous 06/06/11(Mon)22:00 No.15180066
    >>15180012
    It could be worse. Instead of elite, jaded, veteran troops who KNOW how to deal with heresy AND get away with it to do it again....

    .... they could have brought along Sisters. How's THAT for a short fuse.

    Also, I hella want to see the Reasonable spy assigned to the Acolytes in order to chat them up, and get a feeling for the inquisitor. Because thats hella what they would do: Take a wolf, and dress him up in shepherds clothing, leading them around and out of trouble.
    >> Anonymous 06/06/11(Mon)22:08 No.15180145
         File1307412502.png-(163 KB, 1000x1000, Slaanesh_Salesgirl_by_JoPereir(...).png)
    163 KB
    >>15180038
    > Ardi
    >> Anonymous 06/06/11(Mon)22:13 No.15180203
    >>15180066
    Isn't that Harald?
    >> Anonymous 06/06/11(Mon)22:58 No.15180564
    >>15180203

    Yes.

    But, I'm kind of assuming the Inquisitor didn't come alone. They kind of don't do that, or so I'm led to believe.
    >> Anonymous 06/06/11(Mon)23:03 No.15180624
    >>15180066

    Only other option that makes sense. The Grey kiniggits woulda set this fucker on fire already.
    >> Anonymous 06/06/11(Mon)23:10 No.15180700
    >>15180564

    Right, but old Harry doesn't seem much the 'wolf', so the reveal should be... well... typical of the story so far; awesome with a side order of badass.

    ...speaking of which, what's the Magnificent Bastard count at right now?
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/06/11(Mon)23:25 No.15180827
    >POSTING PROBLEMS
    >WHY.JPG

    Er. I hadn't thought about Rightina having a retinue -- half the reason that she hasn't called down the the cyclonic torpedoes is that, without support, she has no room to antagonize her hosts (beyond asking pointed questions).

    (The other half is that she feels a sort of bizarre fascination with what she sees -- she still can't quite believe that they actually use a daemonette as a hazmat disposal specialist, for example, and she's flabbergasted that the Sector is still standing in spite of its deviations. The Apriori are taking both of these into account: they figure that it's better to let it all hang out, and show Rightina that they know what they're doing. Then, when she writes her report, she will (hopefully) say, "These guys are totally off the wall, BUT they're not being stupid, in fact they're quite on top of things [cite: Valkyrie Avenger, grav-driver, genetic screening programs, PSAs, etc.]")

    Although, now that I think about it, I'm sure Inquisitor Lord Damnos has arranged for an expedition of his own...in Chapter Ten, everything goes ploin-shaped on a planet (maybe Regius, maybe somewhere else), and we get to see the Apriori Armed Forces in action, and I could definitely see a Monodominant Inquisitorial Task Force playing a role in it...

    Regarding obvious Inquisitorial actions, like Sisters, or Grey Knights: these guys have dealt with civil war before -- in fact, one of the first major problems they dealt with (which will get discussed in Chapter Nine) was that there was a Sisters of Battle convent which violently objected to the Knights' policies. A direct attack would be devastating, but ultimately repelled, and would only serve to harden the Sector's resolve.
    >> CHAPTER EIGHT: The Torch Not LongPoster... 06/07/11(Tue)00:03 No.15181138
    To investigate the Knights Inductor and Sisters of Reason, Rightina's journey was coming full circle, as they were based on Aprior Tertius, more commonly known as Regius. Their headquarters, the Torch, was buried under an ancient mountain range near Regius' nigh-uninhabitable northern pole. “They like it up there because nobody's around – it helps them do wilderness survival and combat training, and it's good for security.”

    Rightina looked out the window of the shuttle as they approached the Torch, and saw lights below! “So what's that down there?” The shuttle swooped low, and Rightina noticed that the city was devoid of life – a city that well-lit should have been crawling with activity, but this one was not. Instead, Knight Inductor fire-teams advanced through the streets.

    Harald leaned over. “That's their fake city – for urban combat training.”

    The shuttle eventually came to a crater of a long-extinct volcano, and descended through ancient channels and caverns, finally coming to rest in a massive chamber, big enough to hold a small city. Vehicles of every shape and size filled the space, from Thunderhawks to Valkyrie Avengers to the myriad tanks that a Space Marine Chapter fielded. The walls were encrusted with buildings from floor to ceiling, filled with training grounds, living quarters, workshops, and even a small factory. “Welcome to the Torch,” Harald grinned.
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/07/11(Tue)00:04 No.15181147
    Harald and Rightina were greeted by a Chapter staffer – someone who had sought to become a Knight Inductor, and proven highly valuable to the Chapter, but, for one reason or another, had been unable to actually receive the implants. This one, Alex, had tested positive for psychic ability, and so was incompatible with Knight Inductor gene-seed, but would be valuable as a Librarian, to serve as an astropath and psychic defender. Part of his training for the Librarius included learning the Chapter's history, and so it was decided that he would be ideal for showing Rightina around. “Anything in particular you would like to see?” he asked.

    “I keep hearing the word 'Silencers;' could you show me what that means?”

    Alex grimaced. “I'll take you to them, but I won't go in with you – they're Nulls, and I get bad headaches if I'm around more than one.”

    Null Marines? Now that she thought about it, Rightina supposed that such a thing could happen; the Officio Assassinorum usually tried to get Blanks as soon as they were identified, but with their genetic screening program, the Knights Inductor could find Blanks before they were born!



    Rightina, Harald, and Alex eventually came to the reinforced iris door to the Nullarium, and Rightina braced to, once again, pass into a warded area. Alex noticed, and chuckled, “It's not warded to keep the Warp out, you won't need to worry about that. It's warded to keep their null auras in!” The door dilated, and Alex gestured inside. “Go on in, and ask for Ryan – it should be his shift now. I'll wait out here.”
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/07/11(Tue)00:05 No.15181156
    As soon as she crossed the threshold into the dimly-lit chamber, Rightina felt a creeping chill on the back of her neck, and a cold pressure behind her eyes. “That's the null aura,” Harald explained. “There's something about it that trips all of a body's warning systems. I've actually seen some people get an allergic reaction to being around Blanks!”

    “Harald Olsen. Rightina Immam.” A deep, hollow monotone echoed around them. “I apologize for not dampening my aura.” The pressure eased, and the hairs on the back of Rightina's neck laid back down. From the gloom, a Marine's bulk loomed. Circuitry covered the right half of his face, and his left eye, dull grey, seemed devoid of all feeling. “I am Ryan Ornus, Silencer Grade Secundus, and I welcome you to the Nullarium.” He held his hand out, and after fighting down her fight-or-flight instinct, Rightina took it in hers.

    Harald seemed used to being around Ryan. “She'd like to know about you – I'm not aware of any other Chapters who use Silencers,” he explained, saving Rightina from having to find her voice.

    Ryan nodded. “Our role is similar to that of other Librarians, in that we engage in psychic warfare. Unlike Librarians, our tactics involve denying the enemy use of psychic abilities, such as disrupting Tyranid Synapse networks, annihilating Daemons, and shattering the minds of enemy psykers.”

    Rightina's voice returned. “By getting near them and...being Blanks?”

    “Correct. We can also productively use our abilities against non-psyker units, as our auras can instill feelings of dread or, in the case of Eldar, physical pain, thereby reducing their effectiveness. As you have experienced,” he added as an afterthought.
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/07/11(Tue)00:07 No.15181164
    “I've heard of psykers using 'force weapons' – they can channel their power into it, and it becomes more effective. Can you do something analogous?”

    Ryan held up his left hand, which had been replaced with an augmetic, or possibly encased in a gauntlet. “Certain materials lend themselves to conducting psycho-kinetic energy; I can use myself as a connection to ground, so to speak, and drain PKE out of whatever creature I strike. This technique is especially effective against psychic units, like Daemons and Eldar.”

    “So you have fought against Eldar?”

    “I was part of a counter-attack on a Dark Eldar pirate force. We left no survivors.” Rightina thought that she could hear a note of pride in Ryan's voice. “It is not my place to decide whom we attack, but, should our relationship with the Eldar on Lida sour, we Silencers would be the tip of the spear against them, so to speak. I do not anticipate them to be a threat, but I would be surprised if our existence is not part of their strategic considerations – they witnessed us in action when we joined forces against Slaaneshi invaders, and know that they cannot scry us.”

    “And what do you do off the field of battle?”

    “As you have undoubtedly noticed, we take a uniquely nuanced approach to dealing with heretics in the Aprior Sector,” Ryan commented drily. “It has not escaped the notice of this Sector's leadership that such practices leave openings for us to be corrupted. It is the task of the Silencers to be vigilant against the threats of Chaos, and ensure that we remain pure. For example, as we speak, Silencer Hylius is observing a meeting of the Chapter Council, both to ensure the...levelheadedness of all present, and to shield them against divination.”

    “So, if all of this messing around with xenos and heretics went wrong, you would be the ones to know?”
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/07/11(Tue)00:08 No.15181170
    “Us and the Librarius, yes. It would also fall to us to purge the system of taint.”

    Finally, the million-throne question, “and has this ever happened?”

    The silence that followed was oppressive in the stale air of the Nullarium, but Ryan finally answered, “yes and no. Our gene-seed renders us heavily resistant to the whispers of Chaos, but our Librarians are still vulnerable; on one occasion, I had to...terminate one, as he was experiencing the Perils of the Warp. Thankfully, the threat did not spread any further. Similarly, I and four other Silencers deployed to Aprior Sextus Echo when Internal Security discovered – by personal experience – that some heretics' souls are marked for possession the moment they step outside of a warded zone. Aside from the possessed former heretics in question, the only casualties were some unfortunate security personnel.”

    “Have you ever deployed with Librarians? How does that work?”

    “Our powers cancel each other out, so there would be little point in battling together. Furthermore, as we are compatible with Knight Inductor gene-seed and they are not, we are the ones who take the field of battle. That said, we do train together. If Alex feels that he is ready, I will demonstrate.” Leaving the Nullarium, after checking that his null-dampener was fully active, Ryan declared, “Alex, I would welcome the opportunity to train with you in Traning Room Bravo Two.”

    Alex nodded eagerly. “Gladly!”
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/07/11(Tue)00:09 No.15181180
    Training Room Bravo Two was specially built for training with psychic and anti-psychic abilities, with a full set of wards – both to keep the Warp out, and to keep a Silencer's null aura in. After Rightina recovered from the vertigo of crossing the wards, she noticed that Alex and Ryan had taken up positions on either side of the mid-line. “As Ryan undoubtedly explained,” Alex called, “our powers cancel each other, so we don't fight side by side. Nevertheless, we can still learn from each other.” Alex summoned a grid of small lights, ten by ten, in midair. “A Blank usually doesn't start with much control over what he dampens, so we do this drill to train agility.” One of the lights suddenly changed color, and Ryan snuffed it out. The light returned, and then another one changed color, and disappeared by Ryan's power, and reappeared. Faster and faster, the lights winked in and out of existence, until Ryan finally slipped, and snuffed the wrong one. “Not bad!” Alex called.

    “Not my best, either,” Ryan grunted.

    “Alright, I'll let you rest while I sweat.” Snapping his fingers, Alex caused a door in the far wall of the room to open, and few balls bounced out, while a ring descended from the ceiling. “This is a drill for me – I'm trying to get a ball through that ring, and Ryan is trying to stop me.” Focusing his will, Alex lifted a ball a few feet off the floor. “Of course, any psyker with any ability can carry it through, but that makes it easy –”

    Ryan glanced at the ball, and it dropped to the ground. “I can break his grip,” he explained.
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/07/11(Tue)00:10 No.15181190
    “Exactly. The thing is, there are too many balls for Ryan to cover them all – he has to react to me, and that gives me a window of opportunity. Once I grab a ball, though, he'll notice and break my grip, unless I can give it the right momentum – I 'kick' it, so to speak, and let physics do the rest.” Alex and Ryan stared at each other for a long moment, when suddenly, one of the balls launched itself into the air, sailing cleanly through the ring. “I held the ball and kicked it too quickly for him to interfere!”

    “And what does that drill do for you?” Rightina asked.

    “I usually won't take the battlefield – that task is reserved for my hardier, gene-seed-enhanced brothers – but we're all expected to be capable in a fight, and that means I have to be able to work against an opponent – especially, since we're out here on the Fringe, an opponent who can make it difficult or even dangerous to use my powers. I need to be able to see when my opponent's concentration wanes, and take advantage of his sloppiness.”

    Alex and Ryan demonstrated a few other drills, intended to test various aspects of psychic or anti-psychic control, before concluding their impromptu session. “As always, I appreciate your cooperation, Alex,” Ryan declared.

    “Anytime you feel like another round, I'm up for it,” Alex agreed. “Right now, these visitors need to see the rest of the Torch!”
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/07/11(Tue)00:11 No.15181201
    Rightina marveled at the number of classrooms and training rooms available. “Why do you have all of this space? You can't induct more than a few dozen new Marines every year, can you? Does everyone get a room to himself?”

    “No – because this Sector is almost entirely populated with Civilized Worlds, where people aren't expected to fight for survival from day one, we don't know which few dozen out of the hundreds of thousands of children who are compatible with Knight Inductor gene-seed are actually Marine material. So, we pick the few thousand or so who have the capacity for leadership, combat aptitude, and gene-seed compatibility, and train them all at once – we get a few dozen new Marines, and the few thousand others are well-prepared to serve in the Guard, PDF, Internal Security, or just about anything remotely technical or military.”



    Alex decided that, since they were already in the training wing, he would show them how most Aspirants trained. At the moment, they were engaged in firing drills, and Rightina was surprised to see both men and women at the range. “We use the same weapons as our Sisters, so we figured we'd save a few thrones and train them all together,” Alex explained. “A lot of the Aspirants who don't make it go on to serve in the Guard or PDF as Heavy Weapons Teams, so we're effectively training those units, too.” They were clad in rudimentary power armor – Trooper suits, Rightina recalled – and seemed to be firing fake weapons. They jumped in the hands of their wielders, but made no flash or noise. “Those weapons have a spring-loaded mass inside them, so they recoil the same way as the real deal; that way, we can train them in how to properly handle their bolters without expending ammunition, or putting them at risk – bolter shells and Aspirants aren't cheap, you know!”
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/07/11(Tue)00:11 No.15181207
    “But how do they get used to the noise and flashing?”

    “We run live-fire exercises later on, but those are more effective – thereby requiring fewer shells to be expended – if they know how to hold their bolters before starting.” Alex thought for a moment. “I suppose it does take more time to do things our way, but we've got the time, and we end up better-trained in the end.”

    “What do you mean, 'you've got the time'?”

    “I mean – how much do you know about our gene-seed?”

    “It's incompatible with psyker abilities, enhances Blanks, and apparently makes you resistant to Chaos corruption. Is that about right?”

    “Yes, but it is the mechanism which is key – it's the implants which affect the mind which are different. One of the negative side-effects is that hypnotherapy doesn't work – we can only learn the old-fashioned way, which means that training takes much longer. On the plus side, that lets us spread lessons out, which means they sink in better.” Alex paused for a moment, contemplative. “You know, I've always wondered what it must feel like to have all that information just dumped into your brain; it probably warps you inside. Chapter leadership thinks that's why other Chapters are so much more distant from the humans they protect than we are – they literally forget what it's like to be human!”

    Rightina didn't feel like speculating on Space Marine psychology, so she asked, “what else do you do with that extra time?”

    “Oh, all sorts of things, especially for people who are going to end up as officers, or specialists, or working in other services instead of becoming Knights. Leadership, diplomacy, engineering, medicine...the list goes on. We actually get quite a bit of crossover with the other Armed Forces and Security Services, both teachers and students – as you can attest, Harald!”
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/07/11(Tue)00:12 No.15181211
    Harald nodded. “My courses in leadership and close-quarters combat were taught by Knights, and when I took courses in xenobiology from Internal Security, I worked in a group containing a tech-priest, a Knight, and a Sister-in-training.”

    “All of which lets us build a coherent, interoperable force. By cross-training between the various services, we standardize tactical doctrines, communication methods, and equipment, so that any combination of our forces can easily work together – why, Harald could take command of a squad of Knights without too much trouble!”



    When Rightina asked to see what Alex meant by “teacher crossover,” she and Harald were led to yet another training room – in this one, Aspirants and Sisters-in-training were learning close-quarters combat. So as not to disturb the class, Alex, Rightina, and Harald snuck into the back to watch. “The instructor is Sister Silmarwen,” Alex whispered. “Officially, she's the Order's Historian, but she's – well – she's an Eldar, and there's nobody in the sector who's faster with a blade.”

    Silmarwen moved quite slowly as she demonstrated proper technique, but if she saw a student whose ego needed deflating, there would be a blur of motion, and the student's blade would sail across the room, and the student him- or herself would be flat on the floor.



    “So, how does an Eldar get to be a Sister of Battle?” Rightina demanded after they left the room.

    Alex sighed. “I hate to talk about people behind their backs, but the gist of it is, she got found as an infant by a Sororitas task force – actually, this was before the Knights Inductor arrived in the sector. Anyway, the Sister who found her had a daughter who had been taken by the Eldar, so she – either out of maternal instinct, or revenge, or whatever – could not bring herself to kill Silmarwen. So, they trained her to be a Sister instead.”
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/07/11(Tue)00:13 No.15181226
    “And how has that worked out?”

    “Oh, they pushed her extremely hard, and she responded very well – like I said, she's the fastest swordswoman in the Sector, and she's a dead eye with a flamer. She – did you notice that she doesn't wear a soul-stone?” Now that he mentioned it, Rightina hadn't seen one – not that it meant that Silmarwen didn't have one, but she decided to take Alex at his word. “She's laying her soul out for any daemon to devour, with only her faith in the God-Emperor to protect it.” Alex chuckled suddenly. “Actually, I remember, she came with us to negotiate with the Eldar on Lida. We hoped she'd be able to smooth things over, but we – well, we blew it on that one. Some Eldar demanded why she followed 'the mon-keigh corpse god,' and she responded that, at least her god didn't get devoured by Slaanesh, and, to make a long story short, Ryan had to hold them apart and threaten to annihilate their souls to get them to stop arguing.”

    That did sound like the sort of thing a properly devout Sister would do, Rightina mused.



    Training methods aside, the Torch had all of the elements that most fortress-monasteries were expected to have, and so the visit quickly ended. “Harald told me on the way here that you've seen a lot of the important institutions of the Sector – our tech-priests, Internal Security, and our government. As a Librarian, I'm something of an expert on our history, but I've always wanted to hear an outsider's perspective. What do you think so far?”
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/07/11(Tue)00:14 No.15181231
    Rightina struggled to answer. The obvious answer, of course, was that she thought they were either the most heretical Sector in the galaxy (or perhaps, given their apparent successes, the most Emperor-blessed!) because of their extensive deviations. She also knew that such an answer would not go over well, and wouldn't be very helpful to Alex. Finally, she said, “You've done a lot here that I would never have believed possible. Honestly, I can think of at least a dozen ways for this Sector to crash and burn, but you're obviously still standing.” After a moment, she asked, “so, what's the catch?”

    Alex was taken aback. “I beg your pardon?”

    “There's no such thing as a free lunch! What did you have to pay to get here – have you struck a bargain with the Ruinous Powers? The Tau?”

    “We have never been anything but loyal to the Imperium!” Alex snapped. “Nevertheless...everything does have a price,” he admitted. “In our case, that price is five thousand years of trial and error.”

    >Coming Soon: Chapter Nine: The Limits of Reason, in which we learn of the trials through which the Knights Inductor struggled to get to where they are today, including failures of diplomacy, duplicitous Eldar, back-stabbing Tau, and civil uprisings...

    >Also, Chapter Ten: Night Falls, in which we see how the Knights Inductor and Apriori Armed Forces react when everything goes ploin-shaped...

    >U like? U mad? I can only improve by your feedback.
    >> Someone else. !Ep2QNuW1R2 06/07/11(Tue)00:16 No.15181245
    >>15160147
    Someone else. here. I like this a lot.
    >> Anonymous 06/07/11(Tue)00:19 No.15181273
    >>15181245
    Oh man. You've seen it? Excellent. That means there's a chance..

    >>15160126
    Hey SE. You should read this post, and the few before and after.
    And if you're feeling generous or inspired, write your version. I think it would be worth a laugh or three.
    >> Anonymous 06/07/11(Tue)00:22 No.15181304
    So the Knights Inductor have dropped the whole 'Brother' appellation?
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/07/11(Tue)00:26 No.15181345
    >>15181245
    Alright! I'm glad you approve!

    I figured, from the way He handled the Blood Ravens (especially compared to the Grey Knights), that while He doesn't have much patience for messing around, He's not out to get anyone, either (except for the enemies of Humanity, of course) -- He has a healthy respect for results.

    I'm sure you're busy, but if you've read anything else starring the Knights Inductor, do you mind if I ask what you think?
    >> Someone else. !Ep2QNuW1R2 06/07/11(Tue)00:28 No.15181376
    >>15181273
    I just...did read it. It's what I was replying to.

    My own version?The one here is pretty solid.
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/07/11(Tue)00:30 No.15181397
    >>15181304
    I thought I did have them call each other "brother"...

    (ctrl-F "brother")

    Apparently not as much as I had thought. Sorry about that; chalk it up to my drowsiness at this late (early?) hour. Or maybe it's not a problem at all -- perhaps the Knights see themselves as more of a military organization than a bunch of power-armored space monks. I'll need to do some thinking about their collective character. I am wondering about Alex's speech style -- it's not very formal (especially compared to Ryan, but that's intentional -- Silencers are super-formal about everything).

    >Inductive hostron
    >sounds like something Zora might use.
    >> Someone else. !Ep2QNuW1R2 06/07/11(Tue)00:39 No.15181492
    >>15181345
    I've read a bit on the wiki. Frankly, I think the Inquisition is being a bit too forgiving of the various shenanigans the Knights get up to, but that's kind of the point, so...I don't know. It's an interesting concept, though. Specifically, the one about the hive being dismantled and used as a combination power core and museum. I can't see the Mechanicum just letting that slide. Hives are masterworks in their own right, and the Mechanicum spends decades making them.

    I want to stress that it's not BAD by any means, though.
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/07/11(Tue)01:04 No.15181738
    >>15181492
    I'm glad you don't think it's bad (believe me, I know there's plenty of room for revision, these last few chapters especially), although, in my defense, I didn't write the story involving the dismantling of the hive (that was LongPoster, who I, obviously, er, allegedly, am Not).

    I hope that the next couple of chapters will restore some sense of "realism" (relative to the canon) by going over the ways that the Knights Inductor and Aprior Sector have "gotten it wrong" over the millennia.

    >yawn

    One last shameless self bump before bedtime; I'll be back tomorrow (~10 hours from now) to answer questions and comments left overnight, and, maybe, have Chapter Nine: The Limits of Reason.
    >> Anonymous 06/07/11(Tue)01:45 No.15182046
    bump
    >> Anonymous 06/07/11(Tue)02:26 No.15182375
    bump
    >> Anonymous 06/07/11(Tue)03:27 No.15182866
    last bump
    >> Anonymous 06/07/11(Tue)05:16 No.15183397
    Reasonable bump before sleep
    >> Anonymous 06/07/11(Tue)05:50 No.15183592
    bumpedy bump bump bump
    >> Anonymous 06/07/11(Tue)06:54 No.15183885
    Bump of the millenium
    >> Anonymous 06/07/11(Tue)06:54 No.15183887
    Bump
    >> Anonymous 06/07/11(Tue)07:19 No.15184000
    I think that at best, it would be a case of the Imperium bregrudgingly tolerating them, a bit more than they do the Tau seeing as how far away they are and how difficult it may be to conquer them.

    Maybe they'd employ more underhanded, longer-term things? Like immigration.
    >> Anonymous 06/07/11(Tue)10:10 No.15184900
    BUMPAN!
    >> dat ass hentai/toon edition 06/07/11(Tue)10:16 No.15184957
    bumping for content
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/07/11(Tue)10:31 No.15185043
    >>15184000
    That's pretty much where they're at -- the Aprior Sector is too far away from the Imperium, too difficult to crack (a Space Marine Chapter two or three times the regulation size, a highly coherent force of Marines, Guard, PDF, Sisters...), and (as the Emperasque Himself realized) just too useful to conquer.

    >Let's trayst
    Um, no Captcha, let's not...
    >> Anonymous 06/07/11(Tue)12:24 No.15185874
    Bump
    >> Mattmaster 06/07/11(Tue)12:31 No.15185925
    I like. Need MOAR
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/07/11(Tue)13:17 No.15186237
    >>15185925
    Gah! I'm working on it -- I don't write linearly, like Someone Else does, so I can only put stuff up once I've got a full chapter ready. Part of the reason that I've been able to keep up my pace of a chapter a day is that I had a lot of material written that just needed to be put together in a coherent way -- and now I'm flat out (except for the epilogue, but obviously I can't use that).

    I've got other projects to attend to as well -- other stories I want to write, revising what I have, and such.

    If I can't get Chapter Nine finished tonight, I may instead put up a revised Chapter Six.
    >> Anonymous 06/07/11(Tue)14:30 No.15186809
    >>15186237
    You'll burn out if you work to the demands of anonymous people on the internet. Take it at your own pace :)
    >> Anonymous 06/07/11(Tue)15:29 No.15187253
    Reasonable bump
    >> Anonymous 06/07/11(Tue)16:08 No.15187572
    >>15186237
    >>15186809

    Wise words, Anon is the figurative and literal garbage disposal of the interwebs; don't pet us out of affection unless you want your fingers mangled. There's no malice, that's just all we're capable of (though we are capable of malicious mangling as well, mind you).
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/07/11(Tue)16:58 No.15188092
    >>15187572
    I have to say, you guys have done wonders for my output. I figure I'll take a break from the Knights once this thread hits auto-sage; then, I can get things properly edited and archived on 1d4chan.
    >> Mattmaster 06/07/11(Tue)17:46 No.15188476
    I'm not anon! I has name. But in agree with anon, don't burn out. You are outputting a lot more then some other authors I watch. Plus this is quality stuff
    >> Anonymous 06/07/11(Tue)18:22 No.15188920
    bumps
    >> Anonymous 06/07/11(Tue)20:19 No.15189917
    >>15181156
    >>15181164
    >>15181170
    >>15181180
    >>15181190
    You are now reading the words of Ryan Ornus, Silencer Grade Secundus in Ron Perlman's voice.
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/07/11(Tue)20:45 No.15190174
    >>15189917
    I didn't have anybody in mind when deciding Ryan's voice (with the possible exception of Thulenaught), but I always imagined Zora's voice as sounding like Tali's.

    Good news, everyone! I've just invented a device that lets you read the entire thread in Professor Hubert J. Farnsworth's voice!
    >> CHAPTER SIX: Keep Your Enemies Closer Not LongPoster... 06/07/11(Tue)22:04 No.15191053
    >Okay, I won't have Chapter Nine tonight, but I've been revising Chapter Six (retitled to Keep Your Enemies Closer) to keep Elliot's true nature hidden, and explain Zora's motivation for studying xenotechnology.

    The xenos were employed (Zora had reacted indignantly when Rightina had asked where they were “kept”) in one of the furthest wings of the xenotechnology vault; Harald explained that this was because of a longstanding policy known colloquially as “sandboxing” – nobody knew the exact origin of the name, but it meant that individuals of unknown trustworthiness were generally allowed to act as they saw fit, but were prevented from accessing resources which could be used against the Apriori. In the case of the xenos employed by the tech-priests, they were given support for their research, and allowed to cooperate from a distance on projects which related to their fields of expertise, but they could not directly access the Workshop's networks.

    It seemed that most, if not all, of the xenos employed at the Workshop were Tau, of the Earth Caste. Rightina had heard of humans who had defected en masse to the Tau; had these xenos done the same?

    “Why not ask them yourself?” Zora indicated the most senior xeno present. “That is Acolyte Underminer – that is a rough translation of his name, and his former occupation.”

    Hearing his name, Underminer turned to Zora, and then he saw Rightina. “I did not expect to encounter the Imperial Inquisition out here,” he admitted.

    “Of course not – nobody expects the Imperial Inquisition.” Rightina cleared her throat. “So, Underminer; what proof do you have that this isn't an act?”

    >somebody saw a Starship Troopers reference that I didn't intend, but nobody saw the Monty Python shout-out?
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/07/11(Tue)22:05 No.15191073
    Underminer swept his hat from his head, revealing a long scar from front to back, just to the right of center. “This scar is from the surgery to excise my olfactory control node. The Ethereals no longer have a hold over me – or any of us; our will is our own, and we have cast our lot with the Aprior Sector, and your Imperium.” His voice retained the precise, clipped Tau accent, although its edge had softened with the time spent among humans.

    Rightina scoffed. “And I'm supposed to accept that?”

    Underminer shrugged drily. “Accept it, or not; I'm sandboxed, just in case they turn out to be wrong about me. 'Trust, but verify,' as they say.”

    A piece of advice from Inquisitor Lord Damnos sprung to Rightina's mind: “Never trust defectors – they betrayed their first master, and they will betray you as well!”

    Of course, everyone did have lines they would not cross, or values which they would not compromise. Organizations changed, and maybe a member would leave if he was more loyal to ideals than to people. There was only one way to find out: “May I ask what convinced you to change your allegiance?”
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/07/11(Tue)22:06 No.15191086
    Underminer fell silent as he struggled to recall his days as a Tau Engineer. “My memories of the end of my service to the Tau Empire are...uncertain, but I do know that my task force came upon some ancient structures, or possibly an ancient artifact; I do not recall what took place there, but the Ethereal decided that the Greater Good would be best served by destroying us. He told us to die – for the Greater Good – but I – I could not. None of us could.” Underminer's voice faltered as he remembered the terrible choking cold that had clutched his throat and stifled his heart, but then he remembered the heat, the resolve, whatever it had been that had resisted, and how his comrades-in-arms had struggled back to life as well, and his spirit returned. “Whatever we had seen, it changed us so that we would not just lie down and die, so they had us marked for re-education. The camp was overrun by the Imperium, and I feared that we would be put to death, but the Knights Inductor spared us, and the Apriori Imperial Guard just...took us in. They flew us straight to the Aprior Sector – it was only later that I even offered my expertise, so they didn't save us for what we knew – they thought that we were worth saving by virtue of our existence!” Underminer's pride in his adopted people swelled, empowering his voice.

    >alumpr amongst -- a lumpr is amongst us!
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/07/11(Tue)22:07 No.15191095
    “The Ethereals used us, I realized later – we were nothing to them, tools to be discarded on their path to galactic domination. They do not believe in any Greater Good, they believe in what is good for them alone. And then, we learned of your God-Emperor, a man who made the ultimate sacrifice so that his Imperium might live, and how your generals lead from the fore of their armies, how every citizen, one way or another, is dedicated to the Imperium's defense, and we realized that your Imperium better exemplifies the Greater Good than our own Empire did! When we realized that this was the case, we swore – long live the Imperium and the God-Emperor, and death to the Ethereals!”

    Rightina had to admit that she had never heard a Tau speak so passionately in favor of the Ethereals; indeed, Underminer's fervor had left her speechless in a manner that most Imperial preachers couldn't manage. Finally, she found her voice again. “How many are you?”

    “There were twenty workers who served under me, perhaps a hundred to a hundred and fifty Fire Warriors, ten pilots. I understand that some have become advisors to the Apriori Armed Forces and Internal Security, others wished to retire to civilian life.”

    “Any other xenos work here?”

    “A few other Tau defectors – not many.”

    “Generally, an Ethereal will command his force to kill itself rather than risk capture; we only rarely manage to capture them before then or resuscitate them afterward,” Harald clarified.
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/07/11(Tue)22:08 No.15191114
    Underminer continued. “Besides us, there were a few Orks a while ago, from Kaptin Feegul's crew, and I heard that there was an Eldar here once. There may be more in other workshops or with Internal Security. Oh, and then there's Elliot.” Underminer pointed out what Rightina had initially thought was a simple servitor; closer inspection proved that it was something...else. It looked positively ancient, with skin as grey as ash. Its face was gaunt, with long ears like an Eldar, but without their typical ethereal, unearthly beauty, and it seemed to be fixed with a permanently dour expression. Its body was thin and bowed, and it seemed to be so fragile that a gentle breeze would blow it away, as opposed to the typical overly-muscular build of a servitor. In spite of its apparent frailty, its green, sunken eyes had an unnatural intensity; overall, it looked like a corpse which had animated itself out of spite.

    Despite the bodily differences from a servitor, it wielded equipment which would not be out-of-place on a medical servitor, with various syringes and scanning apparatus.

    Rightina turned to Zora. “What is a medical servitor – if that's what Elliot really is – doing in the xenotechnology wing?”

    Zora hesitated before answering, “Xenogenetics. Our Navy led some Dark Eldar into a trap, and we recovered some...hybrids.” Zora shuddered. “I prefer not to think about how they came to be. Anyway, there are some...interesting medical conditions which they are experiencing, most likely as a result of genetic mismatch. We employ Elliot to try and understand what the problem is, and how we can help them.” Zora thought for a moment. “We also study the Blank gene, as it is unusually common in this sector; perhaps one in a million or so have it.”
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/07/11(Tue)22:09 No.15191127
    “And how has that worked out?”

    Zora shrugged. “Results are mixed – we have developed treatments to help hybrids...'synchronize' their heritages, to put it simply, depending on whether they are more human or Eldar, but they are still quite risky. We have learned some, but not much about the Blank gene – it seems to be linked with the Necrons, although we are not sure of the causal relationship. The mechanism by which the gene operates is still unknown to us; when we learn that, we will be able to engineer techniques to grant people the Warp-resistance without also causing the socialization problems.”



    “I have to wonder, Zora; how do you decide which xenos work here? You can't just put them straight to work on faith that they'll be loyal. How do you vet them?”

    Harald cleared his throat. “We don't let just anybody work here; there's a debriefing and screening process, where we decide how trustworthy they are, and how we can best help each other. That's an Internal Security matter, and that's what I normally do. If you're done here, I can show you that tomorrow.”

    “Sounds like fun,” Rightina answered sarcastically. “So, Artisan, have you got any more novelties to show me? Abominable intelligences, perhaps?”

    Zora gasped. “Omnissiah, no, that would be dangerous!”

    “And consorting with xenos isn't? I can maybe understand your perspective on the Quest for Knowledge, but what good can come of studying xeno-technology?”
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/07/11(Tue)22:10 No.15191138
    Zora threw her hands up in the air. “I have shown you what we have accomplished by our variant Quest for Knowledge, and still you lack faith in us! Omnissiah, give me the strength to deal with this close-minded doubter!” With a frustrated wave of her hand, she directed a wall-screen to view a test chamber filled with two dozen plasma guns. Rightina recognized half of them, but not the others. Zora explained venomously, “those plasma rifles on the left are standard Mark Five Mars-pattern Plasma Guns, used by Imperial Guard regiments across the galaxy. Those on the right are Mark Forty Aprior-pattern, using Tau and Eldar plasma technology, used by our armed forces. Now watch.” The twenty-four plasma guns fired as one. Rightina glanced at Zora, but she was too focused on the guns to notice. The plasma guns fired again, and Rightina wondered what Zora had hoped to show her. On the third volley, half of the Mars-pattern guns exploded violently, while the Aprior-pattern guns fired normally. Zora's eye-lights were turned down in a glare as she waved to darken the video-feed. “Did you see that, Inquisitor? We have performed thousands of tests, and a plasma weapon has a one in six chance of exploding on any given shot – one in six! That is unacceptable – monstrous, even! Those miscalibrated Martian scrap-sacks dither and twiddle their mecha-dendrites while Guardsmen are being killed in legions by their own weapons because they are too short-sighted to consider that their vaunted STCs might have errors, or that they might have made mistakes in translation.”
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/07/11(Tue)22:14 No.15191184
    Rightina opened her mouth to speak, but Zora wouldn't have it. “Look at this list!” She waved her hand at the screen, and a long list of names scrolled up. “These are all of the Apriori Guardsmen and Planetary Defense Militiamen who died because of their plasma weapons – two thousand casualties per year. They say that half the Sector is related to at least one person on the list, and I am fortunate enough to be related to two of them. I swore that I would do everything within my power to end this state of affairs, and by the Omnissiah, we have done it. Two thousand casualties a year, down to zero. If being accused of xeno-heresy by small-minded, arrogant old waste processors is the price for such an accomplishment, then I gladly pay it! We study xenotechnology, but we are saving human lives!”

    Rightina had no answer.

    >Coming Soon: Revised Chapter Seven: Returning to the Fold, including Harald's motivation for his work, and a rather...Puritan introduction to Ardi.

    >U like? U mad? I can only improve by your feedback.

    >you're ninizess -- sounds insulting.
    >> Anonymous 06/07/11(Tue)22:23 No.15191328
    awesome, it feels worlds better than the original draft

    can't wait to see what you have in store for the remaining chapters
    >> Anonymous 06/07/11(Tue)23:06 No.15191882
    >>15191053
    >but nobody saw the Monty Python shout-out?

    You realise that 'nobody expects the ________ Inquisition' is used so much on /tg/ that it's just ignored as amusing, expected and par for the course?
    >> Anonymous 06/07/11(Tue)23:44 No.15192344
    >>15191882

    This...
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/07/11(Tue)23:45 No.15192352
    >>15191882
    I haven't seen it here, but I guess it probably got used often enough when that picture of the Pythonic Witch Hunters first got posted.

    >>15191328
    I'm glad you think it's better -- this way, I got to keep my description of Elliot, while keeping his true nature concealed.

    As for what's coming, well, first I'm going to revise Chapters Seven and Eight (somebody commented on a lack of Marines calling each other "Brother," and I figure that Ryan, at least, ought to use that formality), and then in Chapter Nine we're going to see some of the history of the Knights Inductor, especially what they see as their worst failures (they take losses of civilian life very seriously).

    I'm still deciding who's involved, and where things are going to Go Down, but in Chapter Ten, we'll get to see the Apriori in action.
    >> Anonymous 06/07/11(Tue)23:48 No.15192382
    >>15192344
    >>15191882

    same; funny, but I'm friends with a guy who regularly makes me wish Python was never formed despite the fact that i find it hilarious
    >> Anonymous 06/08/11(Wed)00:10 No.15192599
    >>15192382

    Monty Python is great, and people who are Monty Python fans are also great people. Except when they are quoting Python for the billionth time.

    There is something terribly wrong about fans of an absurdist unpredictable comedy group choosing to show their appreciation by repeating the same lines over and over again without any creativity.
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/08/11(Wed)00:17 No.15192679
    >>15192599
    I read somewhere that a member of Monty Python commented that they set out to be utterly unpredictable and undefinable, "and the fact that the OED just included the word 'Pythonesque' shows just how much we failed."
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/08/11(Wed)01:18 No.15193214
    Man, I'm a thread killer!

    Anyway, one last shameless self bump before bedtime; if the thread is still alive tomorrow (~10 hours from now), I'll answer questions/comments left overnight and probably have Chapter Seven (Mk. II), and (since, according to my predictions, this thread's only got a day or two before it auto-sages) maybe revised Chapter Eight as well.

    Ex Tenebras, Lux!
    >> ROW ROW FIGHT THE POWAH 06/08/11(Wed)02:27 No.15193806
    Bumping to keep this alive
    >> Anonymous 06/08/11(Wed)02:51 No.15193943
         File1307515861.jpg-(27 KB, 370x240, 831.jpg)
    27 KB
    image bump
    >> Anonymous 06/08/11(Wed)04:29 No.15194541
    bump
    >> ROW ROW FIGHT THE POWAH 06/08/11(Wed)09:24 No.15196057
    Been a while since the last bump.
    >> Anonymous 06/08/11(Wed)11:13 No.15196888
    bump
    >> Anonymous 06/08/11(Wed)11:47 No.15197130
    I don't want to find the new thread

    bump
    >> Anonymous 06/08/11(Wed)12:38 No.15197536
    Bump
    >> Anonymous 06/08/11(Wed)14:31 No.15198393
    burp
    >> Anonymous 06/08/11(Wed)15:57 No.15199175
    Light up the night!
    *BUMP*
    >> Anonymous 06/08/11(Wed)17:05 No.15199849
    Bump
    >> Mattmaster 06/08/11(Wed)17:41 No.15200138
    Don't redo chapter 7 and 8! Just because of the way they addressesd each other! And ipreffered the original chapter 6
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/08/11(Wed)19:40 No.15201139
    >>15200138
    Chapters 7 and 8 aren't getting redone, per se. The events taking place are roughly as I want them, but, since Rightina's seen all of the divergent practices of the Aprior Sector, I'm flat out of ideas for Chapters 9 and 10 at the moment (I know what I generally want to happen, but it will be a while before I have anything near ready to go). I want to have a solid foundation for those chapters (and for everything else that I write starring the Aprior Sector, since this story basically explains everything unique about them), so I need 6, 7, and 8 to be as good as possible.

    I edited 6 and 7 (er, 7 is being edited) to bring a little more verisimilitude to the canon -- using xenotechnology and cooperating with Eldar and Tau (and even Orks), while theologically iffy, are done by Radical Inquisitors (which the Knights Inductor and Aprior Sector basically are, on a massive scale); working with Necrons (or Necrontyr) and full-on daemons doesn't happen in any loyalist circles, so these have to be concealed or reacted to with indignation and/or violence on Rightina's part, respectively. I also edited those chapters to explain Zora's and Harald's motivations, which got left out of my first draft.

    Regarding Chapter 8, I'm not so certain, on further consideration. Alex is quite informal for a Marine, but he's not a proper Marine (no implants), and the Knights are more down-to-earth than most Chapters, anyway -- polite, but not over-the-top with "Brother this" and "Courage and Honor that". I feel like Ryan could stand to be more formal (Silencers are like that -- blunted or flat affect, formal and precise speech), but it's not a big deal. I do want to look at exploring Alex, Ryan, and/or Silmarwen, but there will be time for that later.
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/08/11(Wed)19:40 No.15201147
    >>15201139
    tl;dr I like Chapter 6 v1.1 more than v1.0, I'm liking Chapter 7 v1.1 more than v1.0, and I'm undecided on whether or not I want to make Chapter 8 v1.1. It will also be quite some time before I get to Chapters 9 and 10 and the Epilogue. If I don't find a compelling way to change Chapter 8 (or come up with a good short story), Chapter 7 v1.1 will probably be the last thing I add to this thread.
    >> CHAPTER SEVEN: Returning to the Fold (revised) Not LongPoster... 06/08/11(Wed)21:47 No.15202584
    >Now revised to include Harald's motivation for working with Adelind (Norn Queen of Hive Fleet Draco), and to have a more...action-packed first meeting between Rightina and Ardi. Unfortunately, I couldn't figure out a way to fit in an explanation for her name, so that will have to be explained in the character profiles.

    During Rightina's first visit to the Aprior Sector, Sergeant Sacres had been suspiciously evasive when he was asked about what the Apriori did with heretics and mutants. By this point in her tour, Rightina had seen that the Apriori seemed to have set out to break every rule in the book, which lead her to believe that, whatever the Apriori did with their heretics, it didn't involve Imperially-sanctioned procedures like cleansing and burning. This raised the question: what did they do instead?

    Whatever they did was done on the fifth moon of Aprior Sextus, chosen for its isolation; as the transit from Quartus to Sextus was too close for Warp travel to be economical, the journey had to be made via sublight drive, which took ten days. In the meantime, Rightina wracked her brain for what could possibly be done with heretics, and found herself at a loss for answers. Most of what she could imagine involved some kind of therapy – but that was impossible!

    Or was it? Before coming to the Sector, Rightina would have declared that it was impossible to cooperate with xenos, or safely and productively deviate from STC canon, but the Apriori had clearly done both of those...



    The Inquisition was a distributed, decentralized organization, but the headquarters of the Ordo Hereticus was nominally the Adepta Sororitas Convent Prioris, on Terra. The building held records, vaults, and training and living facilities, all decorated in the ostentatious Gothic style typical to Imperial government buildings.
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/08/11(Wed)21:47 No.15202588
    The headquarters of Apriori Internal Security, the Panopticon, was rather less ornamented – indeed, from its external appearance, Aprior Sextus Echo was unoccupied, because the headquarters was entirely underground. The shuttle had flown inside a deep trench, revealing a hangar set in one of the walls, which itself connected to the Panopticon. There, Harald scanned his palm-print and eyes, entered a pass-code, and scanned an implanted token, and the door irised open, revealing a labyrinthine office. Rather than festooning every surface with eagles, skulls, and =I='s, the Panopticon was visually sterile, with smooth surfaces colored a cool blue-green. “It's easy on the eyes, and keeps us from getting cabin fever,” Harald explained.

    Harald and Rightina soon came to a junction. “We do a lot here – surveillance, analysis, interrogation, and treatment and reform. What do you want to see?”

    So, the Apriori did try to treat heretics and mutants! The first three tasks were already familiar to her, but how did one reform a heretic? Rightina asked to see where and how it happened.



    “Broadly speaking, we deal with three kinds of people down here,” Harald explained. “We've got people with hereditary mutations – those are pretty easy to fix with some medical genetics, surgery, and physical therapy. With our screening programs, we can actually catch those mutations and prepare a treatment regimen before the person is born! It saves families a lot of time and heartbreak. Most of the time, we don't even see the mutant, since most planets have at least one medical center with the knowledge and equipment to help them, but we keep track of all of them here.”

    “Across the whole Sector?”
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/08/11(Wed)21:48 No.15202596
    “You bet! You've only seen the Aprior System, because there's not enough time to traipse around every world in the Sector, and since this system was colonized and pacified first, it's the pattern on which all the others are based. That said, each world is unique, and we have to keep tabs on things to make sure everybody sticks to the Charter. Each system has its own Internal Security branch, but they all report to us.”



    Eventually, Rightina and Harald came to a thick door, about the size of the door to the tech-priests' Reverse Engineering Department. “This is where we help former Chaos cultists. Just so you know, you may feel a sensation of buzzing or pressure in your head. This ward is psychically warded against the Warp, and those sensations are perfectly typical, but let me know if it gets too distracting, so we can leave,” Harald warned.

    For a brief moment, as soon they crossed the threshold, Rightina's head felt like it had been put in a vise, breathing became laborious, and her vision started to swim. Harald caught her on his arm before she could collapse to the floor, and started to take her back outside, but the feeling quickly passed. Gasping for breath, Rightina stood again. “That's one hell of a ward!”

    “Of course it is – we've got former cultists, Warp-tainted items, heretical texts, you name it. This place would call down every daemon in the Sector if we didn't keep it warded!”

    Rightina looked around, noticing that cells and isolation chambers lined the walls. “So, you actually treat heretics?”

    “We do our best,” Harald corrected. “Not everybody responds well – with our current techniques, we can only heal a person's soul so much. There comes a point where it's more humane for us to kill them quickly and annihilate their soul, rather than keep them alive and in torment.”

    “And if people do respond? How well does it work? What do you do?”
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/08/11(Wed)21:49 No.15202613
    “Why don't you ask someone who's been through it? We've got a few reformed heretics who work here – to catch a thief, and all that.”



    Harald showed Rightina to a room somewhat larger than the other cells. A thin, nervous-looking young man lived inside. He seemed to have a constant tremor or twitch, which suddenly got worse when he saw Rightina.

    “Ah – an Inquisitor – here – but you said – I – you said –”

    “She's just here to understand, Gordon,” Harald reassured him. “You're not in any kind of trouble.” He glanced sharply at Rightina, his eyes sending a message: Do not antagonize him.

    Rightina nodded. “I just want to understand how things get done around here,” she told him.

    The man calmed down, with only his hands trembling slightly. “I – I'm Gordon. I work here as a counselor – to show people that it is possible to move past our – ah – histories.”

    “Do you mind if I ask...what brought you here?”

    Gordon inhaled deeply, and exhaled slowly. “I – don't like to think about it, but I – I made it through, right?” He swallowed nervously. “I used to be a servant of Tzeentch,” he finally admitted. “I was lost before then – unemployed, not enough money to get to college, didn't have the gumption to enlist – and it was comforting to be working for someone who seemed to have a plan.”

    “And then what?”
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/08/11(Wed)21:50 No.15202619
    Gordon laughed shakily. “We tried to summon a daemon, and we got busted. And – and they took us here, and with the isolation, I could feel clear-headed, and I – I remember wondering, 'what the hell was I thinking?' Because I had time to think about it – and they made sure that I thought about it – and I realized what I'd been doing – I mean, the summoning required a sacrifice – and I had just sat back and – and they c-cut him up –” Gordon couldn't make himself continue. “Any – anyway, that was when I decided that I needed to change things.”

    “Like that? Why then?”

    Harald interceded. “Chaos has a warping influence on the mind. People will do almost anything – it's like their reasoning faculties get shut off.”

    Gordon nodded. “I remember feeling like I wasn't really there – I knew, on some level, what was going on, but that it didn't matter somehow.”

    “Part of the reason for the wards is that it keeps that influence out, and part of our counseling is to make people think about what they did, and recognize that their actions and their drives are in conflict – 'provoking dissonance,' they call it.”

    “Yeah – and then, once you get to that point, the program is pretty much detox for the soul. Drain the taint out of it, get people healed up inside.”

    “And how well does that work?”

    Gordon held out his trembling hand. “Results are mixed, obviously. I was pretty good at tennis in high school, and – not anymore. Small price to pay, comparatively speaking.”

    “Some people never fully recover – their souls are always 'marked' somehow, such that if they leave the warded area, they're targets for daemonic possession. We figured that out the hard way, and we haven't got a way to detect it without exposing people to the Warp unprotected, so until we crack that problem, everyone we treat has to stay in a warded zone for the rest of their lives.”
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/08/11(Wed)21:51 No.15202629
    >here's where the changes really begin

    Gordon shrugged. “That's not too bad a fate, if you ask me – better than being daemon lunch, and at least I can be part of the solution here.”



    Gordon's work shift was about to start, so they left him to minister to his patients. As Harald led Rightina out of the warded zone, Rightina saw a daemonette's leg disappear down a side corridor. “Stop right there, heretic scum!” she shouted, as she drew her laspistol and gave chase. Harald called after her, but Rightina didn't have any attention to spare – daemonettes had a knack for disappearing at a moment's notice. This one had obviously taken notice of Rightina's pursuit, as she heard a sudden clattering of claws on metal. Rightina was easily able to follow the noise, when the noise abruptly stopped and she found herself at a T-junction: obviously, the daemonette had entered one room and stopped. Praying that she had chosen wisely, Rightina darted to the right, and found an empty room. When she turned, she suddenly found herself receiving a kick to the jaw, knocking her flat on her back, her laspistol flying into the air; when she felt three talons on her throat, Rightina decided that it was wisest to not struggle until security arrived, and slowly looked up at her prey-turned-assailant.
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/08/11(Wed)21:51 No.15202638
    She had not expected to find the daemonette to be fully clothed – quite conservatively dressed, in fact! She (this daemonette had chosen a more female figure, rather than the typical androgynous form) wore formal business attire, with a pair of thick-framed glasses perched on her nose. Her hair-tentacles, rather than flying wildly around her head, were gathered in a tight ponytail. If not for her obvious bodily mutations, she would not have looked out-of-place at a formal dinner. One claw, large enough to decapitate Rightina with one snap, crushed Rightina's laspistol, while the other gently held a clipboard. The atypical look was completed by the look of concern on the daemonette's face.

    Harald came running down the corridor, panting heavily. “I hope nobody's hurt?” he puffed.

    “I didn't get shot,” the daemonette answered cheerfully. “I kicked her in the chin, though. I didn't hurt you too badly, did I?” she asked.

    Rightina didn't answer. “You work with this – creature?!” she demanded.

    “Well, strictly speaking, 'I' don't work with her, since she's in a different department, but, yes, she is employed by Internal Security.”

    “What's it doing here?”

    “She,” Harald emphasized the pronoun, “is Ardi, and she has personal experience with the Warp and with cults, which helps our research efforts immensely. We also have several items which are dangerous for humans to handle, but harmless to daemons.”

    The daemonette – Ardi – interjected, “I'm right here, you know! You could ask me about my job! By the way, can I help you up? You're not going to try to shoot me if I do, right?” Rightina sighed and nodded, and the daemonette stepped off of her throat, and extended a claw. Rightina pointedly didn't take it. Ardi shrugged, and continued, “when Internal Security busts a cult or smuggler, I go through their effects to see what does what, and how to contain it.”
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/08/11(Wed)21:52 No.15202648
    “Many bindings require extremely expensive components – tears of a virgin shed in the month of June come to mind – and some are mutually contradictory,” Harald explained. “Ardi is extremely valuable because she can let us use exactly what is needed, and no more.”

    “And why not burn it?”

    Ardi gasped. “You don't just burn Warp-tainted stuff! What if there's a daemon bound inside, or worse? Honestly, there are some artifacts and texts that even I can't understand; we're best off just keeping these things sealed away. Hence the wards.”

    Rightina glared at Harald. “I guess, at this point, all I can do is ask if you're using proper safety protocols with – her.”

    “I stay in the warded zone,” Ardi explained. “I can't teleport, shape-shift, escape to the Warp, nothing. I'm just about powerless here, and honestly, with the prevalence of the Blank gene, this sector is probably the worst place for a daemon to be.”

    At least the Apriori weren't leaving themselves entirely open to corruption – Aprior Sextus Echo was as far from the centers of government as could be. “And does that hurt? Why put up with the warding for – forever?”

    Ardi shuffled her foot as she thought, digging three parallel scratches into the floor. “This lets me help them, and it lets them be sure that, if I'm lying to them, the harm that I can do is minimized. I – I can't help helping people, it's just who I am, and if I couldn't – I don't know what I'd do! I might as well ask why you keep – inquisiting. It's just what you do, isn't it?” Rightina wasn't sure that she liked being compared to a daemonette.

    The intercom buzzed, and a voice announced, “Chaos contraband inbound; hazmat teams to loading dock Charlie Four.”
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/08/11(Wed)21:53 No.15202652
    Ardi grinned. “That's my cue, I'm afraid. Nice talking, Harald, and I hope to see you both again sometime!” Rightina scowled at her as she left. She hadn't made any attempts at seduction; she had to be the most patient daemonette in the galaxy.

    When she asked Harald about that, he actually laughed. “If she were Tzeentchian, I might believe that she's been playing us for fools for a century, but she's not. Daemons are fairly simple, at least as far as their motivations go; they are basically constructs of pure emotion, and that's all that they feel, and all that motivates them. Usually, that's blood-lust, or something similar, but as far as we can tell, she got built out of compassion.”

    “That leaves the question of why anyone would summon a daemonette of compassion – and frankly, how they even exist! I've never heard of a daemonette that runs around giving people comforting hugs, or whatever it is that they would do on the battlefield.”

    “The Warp is influenced by all emotions, Rightina, even the positive ones. As for how she got summoned, her cult wasn't asking for any daemonette in particular, they just grabbed the closest one. She realized that the cult was hurting people, so she contacted us.” Harald chuckled. “Usually, summoned daemons don't blow the whistle on their own cults, but Ardi did – knowing full well that we might destroy her, she told me later.”

    “That didn't matter to her?”

    “Apparently not – she could act to help people, so she did.”

    Unbidden, Rightina wondered briefly what it must be like to be a daemon, driven solely by a single emotion, and unable to feel anything else. Maybe there were more daemons composed of negative emotions because it was easy to follow them? To feel compassion for any and every being, no matter how hostile, must be incredibly painful.
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/08/11(Wed)21:53 No.15202656
    Rightina didn't want to think too hard about the psychology of the creatures her organization was sworn to destroy, so she changed the subject. “You said there were three kinds of people here, Harald. Mutants, Chaos cultists, and...?”

    “Xenos. That's actually where I usually work – so we won't have to interrupt anybody to ask questions!”

    “So, you employ xenos here, too?”

    “Not really – we're mostly vetters. If the Armed Forces capture some infiltrators, or find some alleged defectors, or what have you, they come to us, and we decide what to do, depending on the species. Tau get their olfactory control node severed, for example, and then we go from there.”

    “What do you deal with, for the most part?”

    “We're on the Eastern Fringe, so we mostly get Tau and Tyranids.”

    “Do you try to heal Genestealer Hybrids, too?”

    Harald's face fell. “We try,” he finally whispered. “This way.”



    Harald and Rightina came to a hallway lined with isolation cells. Inside, hybrids of varying degrees of humanity lay on beds, hooked up to intravenous feeding and medicine lines. The ones whose eyes were open had a vacant, thousand-yard stare, as if they were asleep or lobotomized.

    As Rightina and Harald passed one of the rooms, the occupant suddenly became animated; her body was entirely human, although her eyes were still eerily empty. “Madam,” the woman called, “please tell me, have you seen my child?” Rightina had scarcely managed to answer in the negative before the woman continued, “she's such a beautiful child, she means the world to me! Only, they tell me she's sick. They took her from me. But she will return! She's smart, and strong, and she will find me, no matter how far away she is...” The woman's gaze sank to the ground as her voice trailed off, and Rightina was left speechless.
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/08/11(Wed)21:54 No.15202663
    She turned to Harald. “What was that –”

    The woman looked up, and seemed to notice Rightina again. “Madam, please tell me, have you seen my child?” Harald gently took Rightina's arm, and they left the woman to talk to the air about her child.

    “She's been infected by a Genestealer,” Harald explained. “She was a passenger on a ship from a planet which, we learned later, was home to a Genestealer cult. The trip here was long enough for the infection to fully corrupt her, and if we hadn't caught her in the Customs screening, she would almost certainly have founded a cult here – she was actually pregnant when she arrived.” He shook his head sadly. “Genestealer infectees are the most depressing to work with, because they still think and feel, but their will is drained from them. You noticed her eyes?” Rightina nodded. “Her hybrid child is literally the only thing she thinks about – the infection has robbed her of every other motivation. If this facility weren't warded against psychic activity, she and her child would detect each other and they would do everything within their power to get back together; until then, that woman has no other drives.”

    “So, why hasn't anyone else asked me about their children?” Rightina wondered.

    “Maybe they're asleep, or childless – about a decade ago, we busted a big cult on Tarquin Dorsus, where a lot of hybrids were apparently solely used as soldiers. Without a cult network to guide them, they don't do anything – they won't even feed themselves, which is why we have them hooked up to IVs.”

    Rightina fell silent as she pondered the progression of a Genestealer infectee. Did the mind ever become aware of the subversion and fight it? Could the mind be aided by medicine? She asked Harald if such a thing was possible.
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/08/11(Wed)21:55 No.15202676
    “At the moment, we can reverse the genetic changes with a counter-retrovirus, but that won't restore a person's mind.” Harald shook his head. “I can't bear to think too hard about what they must be going through, and their families, too – we've tried everything from Librarians to Silencers to warding to hypnosis, and they just don't respond. We've recently started engaging with Adelind, to see if she can help.”

    Rightina stopped short. “And what is Adelind? A code-name for a something which will, undoubtedly, set the bar even lower for the sector?”

    “...Yes,” Harald admitted. “It's a Hive Fleet.”

    “You realize that you're at the point where nothing surprises me, right? This cannot be a good sign.”

    “If we're going to work together, we'll have to trust each other. You are more or less powerless here – it's not like any of our ships will commence an Exterminatus on their own homes, and by the time you get word back to the Imperium, we will have decades of warning and be all but impregnable when the fleet arrives. That gives us an obligation to be fully open with you in return.”

    “Wait – who said anything about working together?”

    “We're back in communication with the Imperium, right? We need to make things fit together, and that means that Aprior Internal Security needs to liaise with the Inquisition, and that starts with you and me.”

    “And you're not willing to consider, I don't know, purging the taint from the Sector to make things fit?”

    “I'm afraid we're too far down the path to consider that, Rightina, and frankly, if our strategic prognostications are any indication, it's the Imperium that will have to change – as a matter of survival.”
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/08/11(Wed)21:55 No.15202683
    Harald led Rightina to a briefing room; gesturing for Rightina to take a seat at the conference table, he pulled up a star map on the holo-projector. “This is our subsector,” he explained. “We're here.” A red dot appeared over Aprior Sextus Echo. “And this is Hive Fleet Draco, or what's left of it.” The view changed to a nearby star, Tarquin. The star had two planets, exactly sixty degrees apart from each other. The one in the 'front,' designated Tarquin Ventrus, was dead, and had a Tyranid hive ship orbiting it. Further out, a small fleet stood vigil; Rightina recognized a Knights Inductor Strike Cruiser and two Gladius Rapid Strike Vessels. “A century back, we failed to stop a Genestealer Cult from taking root on Tarquin Ventrus, and it called down the Tyranids. We evacuated the inhabitants and prepared an Exterminatus, and then...they stopped. The Tyranids in orbit and on the ground just laid down and died of starvation, except for the central Hive Ship. We conducted a genetic analysis, and it seems that they consumed the Blank gene, and spliced it into themselves, cutting themselves off from the Hive Mind.”

    Rightina blinked. “So what did they do after that?”

    “Nothing! Without the driving hunger, the Synapse creatures had no motivation, and so the creatures under their control didn't do anything, either. Our Librarians tell us that only the Norn Queen herself – designated Adelind, it's from an old word for 'serpent' – is still alive, and that she's getting smarter by the day, now that the hunger isn't stifling her. Communication is difficult – frankly, we're still dealing with an alien mindset – but we think she's not hostile; just in case, we've got our fleet watching.”

    “And you think...she...may have a way to reverse the Genestealer infection?”
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/08/11(Wed)21:56 No.15202690
    “There may be a way for her to override the Brood Mind, and restore the minds of the infected. At least, we hope she can – our Librarians and Silencers have been unable to disentangle the original personality from the Brood Mind.”

    “Maybe so, but is it worth it? I mean, you're playing with fire here –”

    “Do not lecture me about risks, Inquisitor; my mentor was the woman who did the threat analysis concerning Draco! We have exhausted all of our other options. If working with a Hive Fleet may find us a cure, then I will make it happen!”

    Rightina frowned as she realized where she'd heard that tone of voice before. “You sound like Zora; what is it that's driving you like this?”

    “The knowledge that, in a world where humans and xenos can coexist – and even cooperate – and heretics can be healed, and entirely knew technologies can be created from nothing, I am utterly powerless to help these people! They have had everything taken from them, Inquisitor, and I will not rest – I CANNOT rest, until their lives are restored!” Harald chuckled bitterly. “It's not just Zora and I who feel this way about our fields of expertise. Underminer, too, and those protestors on the lawn, and Chapter Master Randi, and Lieutenant Rallen, and everyone who ever struggled to protect this Sector – we know, instinctively, that there must be a way to make things better, and we will not stop trying to find it.” After a long silence, Harald shook himself out of his reverie. “Anyway, while we're still here, I might as well show you where the other...interesting folks in the sector live.”

    “Like an Ork Waaagh, perhaps? Underminer mentioned a 'Kaptin Feegul.'”
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/08/11(Wed)21:57 No.15202696
    “Kaptin Feegul has a sizable crew under his command, mostly Stormboys and Kommandos, and they're not so much a Waaagh as a 'Shhh:' they rely on rapid-assault and stealth, and they call themselves 'The Green Shadow.' It seems he's convinced that, if he can protect us long enough, we'll grow to be big and strong like his Orks are, and then he'll have a good time fighting us.”

    “And how long has this gone on?”

    “Fifty years since he arrived in the Sector, plus however long they've been together before then. They don't seem to have noticed that we aren't getting any bigger, or if they have, they don't care. I mean, look at it from their perspective: out here on the Fringe, there's a lot of bigger, nastier things for Orks to fight than humans.”

    “I guess Orks aren't known for their subterfuge; but Eldar? Underminer mentioned them, too.”
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/08/11(Wed)21:57 No.15202701
    “You're not with the Ordo Xenos, so I don't know how much you know about Eldar, but some of them basically abandoned all of their advanced technology, preferring to live simpler lives – that's how they avoid the temptations of falling to Chaos. They call themselves 'Exodites,' and there's a colony of them in the Lida system.” The star map's focus changed, highlighting the Eldar colony. “Imperial records suggest that these colonies, and especially Craftworld Eldar, react violently to interference; while we were settling the Sector, we didn't have the manpower to contest them directly, so we left them a wide berth. Then, about eighty years ago, we detected an Emperor's Children Strike Cruiser on a direct course to the Lida system; that Cruiser had frequently been encountered engaging Eldar, and Ardi informed us that Slaanesh is particularly partial to Eldar souls, so there was little doubt to their intentions. We computed that the Eldar would take significant losses, including many souls lost to Slaanesh, so we sent a Silencer force after the cruiser. Between a preliminary barrage to damage the cruiser en route, and lightning assaults on planetside summoning sites, we and the Eldar were able to annihilate them with no losses.”

    “And what did that get you?”
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/08/11(Wed)21:58 No.15202708
    “They told us that they were expecting losses upwards of 30 percent; since they hadn't seen any possibility of our assisting them, it seems that Silencers are invisible to prognostication. This in and of itself is a great boon: knowing that we have a totally unpredictable strike force is a great deal of leverage over the Eldar, and being responsible for saving thousands of Eldar lives – which we could easily have allowed to perish – is more leverage. They promised that, should any of their Craftworld cousins get the wrong idea over what we did, they would intercede to try and stop war from breaking out, and their younger leaders have expressed some interest in further cooperation, such as technology exchange – it will take time for the colony's opinions to change, but I think we're headed in the right –”

    Rightina interrupted Harald. “Hang on. You've used the word 'prognostication' twice now. Is that important?”

    Harald hemmed and hawed for a moment. “I don't know. Maybe. You see, the Eldar have one great advantage over us, and that is their ability to see the future – or possible futures, at any rate. So, they offered to scry for us. Bear in mind, we have no way of knowing that they are telling us what they really saw, and that our Silencers, and anyone with the Blank gene, for that matter, cannot be scried in any way, and so may exert any number of unknown influences on the future, so their predictions are...highly speculative, at best. That said, they told us that we – which may be the Aprior Sector, or the Imperium, they were not clear when they told us, and may not know themselves – would not be able to stand alone against the coming threats. We would have to stand with the Eldar, and maybe the Tau, in order to survive in the long run.”
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/08/11(Wed)22:03 No.15202765
    Rightina scratched her head. “That sounds awfully convenient for the Eldar with whom we would, hypothetically, be cooperating.”

    “Very true! But it would be convenient for us, too. And, frankly, the Tyranids and Necrons are coming in ever-growing numbers, and Chaos isn't getting any weaker, either – we will need all the allies we can get.”

    “So, if, hypothetically, you decided that you had to work with the Eldar, would you, Aprior Internal Security, be the ones to get the deal hammered out?”

    “Oh, no! We're investigators, not diplomats. If you want diplomacy, you'll have to talk with the Knights Inductor and the Order of Reason's Light.”

    >So, that's it for revised Chapter 7. Better than the original? Worse? I'm not feeling as strongly about this chapter as I was about the last. I don't feel a particular need to revise Chapter 8, so I won't, and since I won't have Chapters 9 and 10 done for a while yet, this is where I'll take a break from the Knights Inductor for a while.

    >Things I've got in store: Chapter Nine: The Limits of Reason, in which we learn about the history of the Knights Inductor and what they see as their failures, and Chapter Ten: Night Falls, in which we see how the Knights Inductor and Apriori Armed Forces react when everything goes ploin-shaped. Also, some short stories starring the Green Shadow, the Eldar of Lida, and Adelind.

    >As always, I'll stick around to answer comments and questions for a while. U like? U mad? I can only improve by your feedback.
    >> Anonymous 06/08/11(Wed)22:12 No.15202844
    You corrected the Hive Fleet name when first mentioned, but left it Draco for the star map scene.
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/08/11(Wed)22:56 No.15203230
    >>15202844
    I was thinking that the Hive Fleet is named Draco, and the Norn Queen in particular is called Adelind (since Adelind is a female name, and Draco is male, and we're talking about a Norn *Queen*), but I guess that's a little clunky (and, since she's the only sentient being in the fleet, they are effectively one and the same). I'll switch them all over to Adelind.
    >> Anonymous 06/09/11(Thu)03:08 No.15205738
    Light up the bump!
    >> Anonymous 06/09/11(Thu)06:22 No.15206882
    Love the revision, NLP, much smoother narrative and the revelations come across way less clunky than they did the first time. Don't get me wrong, they were still epic the first time, but the revised are even better.

    >>15203230
    The last remaining ship could be called Draco?

    As for what happens in chapters 9 and 10, perhaps Rightina's master/mentor/colleague feels her report was enough and isn't going to wait for a sanctioned crusade?

    It would still take a decade or so (a few years if it were a smaller strike fleet rather than a full-on crusade) to get in motion, maybe, but it wouldn't be through official channels so only Eldar farseeing would be able to pick it up... unless Lord Damnos has a... "defence".

    Though a trial by fire and a subsequent vindication isn't exactly original, so... Iunno, maybe it happens and then gets stalled by an external threat, like that Necron awakening that would be introducing Elliot fully, maybe? which would let everything be settled at
    "okay, I guess we tolerate this happy ball of sunshine in our galaxy of grimdark for now"
    rather than something more mary-sue than I think anyone here would really be comfortable thinking about.

    Just my rambling thoughts, oh, and I like the proper/casual distinction you're looking at making between Ryan and Alex, respectively. It would be a little goofy for the Chapter-that-broke-away-from-oppressive-space-feudalism to cleave to universal use of the brother-marine shtick.
    >> Anonymous 06/09/11(Thu)06:24 No.15206893
    >>15206882
    Hive Ship Draco, piloted by Queen Adelind?
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/09/11(Thu)07:16 No.15207157
    >>15206882
    Hmm. I've been thinking about Chapter 10 involving some kind of civil uprising, exacerbated by the Tau and possibly a covert team sent by Damnos, but I'm liking the idea of a private crusade (no reason I can't use both, of course).

    To have the totally-not-a-crusade arrive sooner, Lord Damnos could start setting things in motion as soon as he sees Rightina's draft report -- not even bothering to wait for the panel's verdict (as far as he is concerned, the Sector is guilty, no matter what anyone says), which will shave a few years off of the arrival time (as, while the Panel is busy with deliberations and testimony, he's gathering forces).

    Damnos probably wouldn't be too concerned about "xenos witchcraft," but he's not a fool. He might be able to use some Culexi (Culexuses? Faux-Latin word gets a Faux-Latin plural) to shield some key part of his force, like a strike team of Grey Knights (I'm looking forward to pitting Ryan against a Grey Knight Terminator). Of course, Eldar being Eldar, the only warning the Sector's going to get is some cryptic, vaguely ominous warning of impending doom ("beware the dagger-bearing hand of the all-seeing ones," or something, and the not-crusade turns out to be code-named "Dagger Fleet" or "Task Force Dagger").
    >> Anonymous 06/09/11(Thu)10:32 No.15208155
    >>15207157
    choice; take your time, though, we can wait
    >> Taffer 06/09/11(Thu)11:24 No.15208526
    >>15207157
    You could go Shakespearean for the Eldar prophecy, I figure. Here, lemme give it a shot. Something from Julius Ceasar, perhaps.

    "Beware the eyes (referring to the =I= of the Inquisition) of the Senators ( Inquisition and their forces) oh Brutus (called noble and honorable by Mark Anthony, basically referring to the Reasonable Marines). The daggers (Task Force Dagger) and hounds (the phrase 'dogs of war' is made famous by this play so therefore war) come at thee led by Marc Antony (who basically turned a crowd praising and cheering Brutus' role in the assasination of Julius Ceasar to a blood hungry mob eager to rip him to shreds, reflecting the role of Damnos who incites his forces against the KI)"

    So, Not LongPoster, elegan/tg/entlemen and ca/tg/girls lend me your ears and tell me what you think.
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/09/11(Thu)12:46 No.15209175
    >>15208526
    Interesting; it would need some changes to be properly Imperialized (I doubt the Eldar would actually quote a mon-keigh scribbler), but I especially like the "daggers and hounds" bit, and the "eyes" part, too -- I wanted something involving eyes, but couldn't get it to fit.

    It could be Imperialized as something like:

    "Beware the eyes of the High Lords, oh Zakis [or whoever it is that's receiving the prophecy]. The daggers and hounds come at thee led by the avenger of the Throne [or some similarly poetic title that turns out to be close to a nickname for Inquisitor Lord Damnos]."
    >> Anonymous 06/09/11(Thu)14:02 No.15209781
    I don't quite buy Ardi, but the rest is pretty good. I expect a Radical Inquisitor wouldn't have too many problems with it, but somebody more orthodox would, well, flip the fuck out.

    Does she not get a prepared report to read beforehand or what?
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/09/11(Thu)14:24 No.15209963
    >>15209781
    The Aprior Sector basically is a Radical Inquisitor's outlook (specifically the Recongregator sect) scaled way up.

    Several reasons for Rightina to not get a prepared report. For one thing, she's visited the Sector already (http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/2803229/#2803229), so she is at least aware that the Apriori are doing things that are not exactly mainstream Imperial policy. She's also more Puritan than not, so if the Apriori are going to convince her that they know what they're doing and that it's the right thing, she will have to see it with her own eyes -- if she got a written report on what's going on in the Sector, she may have been convinced that they were lying, or being reckless, or even working against the Imperium, when none of these are the case.

    A prepared report might be intercepted by those...less than friendly to the Aprior Sector (not that Inquisitor Lord Damnos needs any more of a reason to declare a Crusade).
    >> Anonymous 06/09/11(Thu)15:24 No.15210454
    >>15209781
    I liked the sort-of fight scene she got in the revised chapter.
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/09/11(Thu)18:10 No.15212134
    >>15210454
    Glad you did -- the initial draft of that scene (unpublished) had Rightina actually catching Ardi, being taken by surprise by Ardi's appearance, which left Ardi an opening to pop her in the jaw. Then I figured that Rightina's too professional for that to happen, and a daemonette has a hefty advantage over a human in close combat anyway.
    >> Anonymous 06/09/11(Thu)21:25 No.15213738
    Light up the night!
    *bump*
    >> Tales from the Aprior Sector: Shadows in the Forest Not LongPoster... 06/09/11(Thu)23:24 No.15214571
    >I know that I said I was going to take a break from the Aprior Sector for a while, but...I love the Green Shadow! Here's a quick short story starring our favorite Reasonable Orks.

    >Rightina was not the only member of the Inquisition sent to the Aprior Sector; Inquisitor Lord Damnos personally arranged for several saboteur teams to penetrate the Sector and soften it up in advance of Task Force Dagger's arrival. This team ran into some unexpected trouble.

    Inquisitorial Stormtrooper Team Dagger Alpha Three advanced invisibly through the forests of Aprior Quartus Delta. Their goal: Wells Defense Works, the largest munitions manufacturer in the Sector, nicknamed “the Arsenal of Freedom” by the Apriori. Task Force Dagger was powerful enough to overwhelm any system, but a determined foe – and the Apriori were nothing if not determined – would exact a heavy penalty in return, unless this manufactorum could be destroyed. With D-Day only three weeks away, time was running out.

    The team's leader, a man known only as 'Chief' by his squad-mates, called for a status update: “Specs, distance to target?” He and his team knew, thanks to the machine spirits in their goggles – specially gifted by one of Inquisitor Lord Damnos' Forge World contacts – but it was protocol to confirm with the electronics specialist.

    “Two klicks, ETA forty-five minutes at this pace,” a severe woman's voice replied. “Estimated five hundred meters to detection perimeter.”

    “Final status check. Charges?”

    The team's lead demolition specialist checked his demo charges – again – and confirmed that they were in working order. “Green.”

    “Weapons? Stealth systems?” Green status lights winked on his visor as each team member confirmed. “Commencing final approach to target. Commence vox silence.” The familiar hiss of the vox-caster bead ceased, and the team continued their advance.
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/09/11(Thu)23:25 No.15214579
    ed Scope to flank to the barrel's left, while he flanked to the right – was it a trap? A sensor post? Their stealth systems should keep them hidden, but it couldn't hurt to check – and it could hurt a lot to remain ignorant.

    The moment of flanking the barrel proved rather anticlimactic, as there seemed to be nothing in it. Chief signaled his team to regroup, when deep, throaty laughter echoed among the trees. As one, the team turned to see a massive Ork Nob lazily sitting on a log that they had passed moments before – as if he had appeared from thin air!

    “Ya get points fer observation, but yer speed needs work – whoever left dat barrel dere was a sloppy git, and ya coulda caught 'im,” the Nob said conversationally.

    Specs signed, 'shall we attack?'

    “Wouldn't try it if Oi was you lot,” the Nob answered – so he knew Cadian battle-sign! – “on account of dere bein' six of you, an' a dozen of us.” As he spoke, eleven Orks appeared from the undergrowth, heavily camouflaged, larger than any of the stormtroopers, and very, very well armed. “Now, technic'lly, we 'aven't seen ya do anyfing wrong, but I got da feeling dat ya ain't here ta sell Eatin' Squigs. If Oi was you, Bitty Boss, Oi'd call it a day, and ferget why ya came.” The Orks started vanishing into the forest once more, until only their Nob was left. “Remember, Da Green Shadow's always watchin' from da – er – shadows, roight? Oi dun wanna see yer mugs 'round 'ere again, or we'z gonna put yer skulls on a pointy stik ta warn da next lot of ya.”
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/09/11(Thu)23:25 No.15214588
    With little choice, Chief signaled his team to abort, and they trudged away from the manufactorum, but not before he asked: “How?”

    The Nob laughed again. “Yer tek-boyz are good, but they 'aven't figured out a way ta hide yer stink!” Winking at Chief, he, too, vanished, leaving the team apparently alone in the forest.

    Except for the shadows, of course.

    >The End

    >U like? U mad? I can only improve by your feedback.
    >> Anonymous 06/10/11(Fri)00:15 No.15214905
    >>15214579
    >>15214588
    Looks like you're missing a big chunk of text.
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/10/11(Fri)00:21 No.15214955
    >>15214905
    Er, no, it's all there. What do you mean?
    >> Anonymous 06/10/11(Fri)00:43 No.15215169
    >>15214955
    In >>15214579 you start with
    >ed Scope to flank to the barrel's left, while he flanked to the right
    Completely missing when they first notice the barrel, and indicates a cut off word.
    >> Tales from the Aprior Sector: Shadows in the Forest (repaired) Not LongPoster... 06/10/11(Fri)00:47 No.15215218
    >>15215169 blast and botheration, you're right! It's only a few posts, I'll go ahead and put them all up again.

    >I know that I said I was going to take a break from the Aprior Sector for a while, but...I love the Green Shadow! Here's a quick short story starring our favorite Reasonable Orks.

    >Rightina was not the only member of the Inquisition sent to the Aprior Sector; Inquisitor Lord Damnos personally arranged for several saboteur teams to penetrate the Sector and soften it up in advance of Task Force Dagger's arrival. This team ran into some unexpected trouble.

    Inquisitorial Stormtrooper Team Dagger Alpha Three advanced invisibly through the forests of Aprior Quartus Delta. Their goal: Wells Defense Works, the largest munitions manufacturer in the Sector, nicknamed “the Arsenal of Freedom” by the Apriori. Task Force Dagger was powerful enough to overwhelm any system, but a determined foe – and the Apriori were nothing if not determined – would exact a heavy penalty in return, unless this manufactorum could be destroyed. With D-Day only three weeks away, time was running out.

    The team's leader, a man known only as 'Chief' by his squad-mates, called for a status update: “Specs, distance to target?” He and his team knew, thanks to the machine spirits in their goggles – specially gifted by one of Inquisitor Lord Damnos' Forge World contacts – but it was protocol to confirm with the electronics specialist.

    “Two klicks, ETA forty-five minutes at this pace,” a severe woman's voice replied. “Estimated five hundred meters to detection perimeter.”

    “Final status check. Charges?”

    The team's lead demolition specialist checked his demo charges – again – and confirmed that they were in working order. “Green.”

    >orkerst comed
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/10/11(Fri)00:48 No.15215227
    “Weapons? Stealth systems?” Green status lights winked on his visor as each team member confirmed. “Commencing final approach to target. Commence vox silence.” The familiar hiss of the vox-caster bead ceased, and the team continued their advance.

    Suddenly, the team's point-man raised his hand to halt his comrades. Pointing, he indicated a scrap barrel that – now that Chief thought about it – hadn't been there a moment ago. Chief signaled Scope to flank to the barrel's left, while he flanked to the right – was it a trap? A sensor post? Their stealth systems should keep them hidden, but it couldn't hurt to check – and it could hurt a lot to remain ignorant.

    The moment of flanking the barrel proved rather anticlimactic, as there seemed to be nothing in it. Chief signaled his team to regroup, when deep, throaty laughter echoed among the trees. As one, the team turned to see a massive Ork Nob lazily sitting on a log that they had passed moments before – as if he had appeared from thin air!

    “Ya get points fer observation, but yer speed needs work – whoever left dat barrel dere was a sloppy git, and ya coulda caught 'im,” the Nob said conversationally.

    Specs signed, 'shall we attack?'
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/10/11(Fri)00:49 No.15215236
    “Wouldn't try it if Oi was you lot,” the Nob answered – so he knew Cadian battle-sign! – “on account of dere bein' six of you, an' a dozen of us.” As he spoke, eleven Orks appeared from the undergrowth, heavily camouflaged, larger than any of the stormtroopers, and very, very well armed. “Now, technic'lly, we 'aven't seen ya do anyfing wrong, but I got da feeling dat ya ain't here ta sell Eatin' Squigs. If Oi was you, Bitty Boss, Oi'd call it a day, and ferget why ya came.” The Orks started vanishing into the forest once more, until only their Nob was left. “Remember, Da Green Shadow's always watchin' from da – er – shadows, roight? Oi dun wanna see yer mugs 'round 'ere again, or we'z gonna put yer skulls on a pointy stik ta warn da next lot of ya.”

    With little choice, Chief signaled his team to abort, and they trudged away from the manufactorum, but not before he asked: “How?”

    The Nob laughed again. “Yer tek-boyz are good, but they 'aven't figured out a way ta hide yer stink!” Winking at Chief, he, too, vanished, leaving the team apparently alone in the forest.

    Except for the shadows, of course.

    >The End

    >U like? U mad? I can only improve by your feedback.
    >> Anonymous 06/10/11(Fri)01:03 No.15215386
    >>15215236
    I like it
    >> Anonymous 06/10/11(Fri)01:54 No.15215835
    >>15215236
    I like it. But wouldn't the Inquisition just try again harder to destroy the weapons factory?
    >> Anonymous 06/10/11(Fri)05:01 No.15217071
    >>15215835
    If anything, they'd probably just bomb out the entire forest with it.
    >> Anonymous 06/10/11(Fri)09:44 No.15218651
    >>15217071
    >>15215835
    Yeah, but doing so would reveal the advance Dagger force, which would give the Apriori warning about the approaching task force.
    Retreating without conflict was the reasonable thing to do.
    Of course, this is the Inquisition we're talking about here; they might not be reasonable.
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/10/11(Fri)10:47 No.15218957
    >>15218651
    If the sabotage team had been Sisters of Battle, they probably would have tried to start a forest fire or something once they got caught. Fortunately for the Aprior Sector, these guys are stormtroopers (i.e. former Imperial Guard), so they knew when to fold 'em.

    I guess I should mention, at the time of this story, the Aprior Sector knows that they're getting some kind of Inquisitorial attention (and not the good kind) from the other sabotage teams (who didn't get intercepted by Orks -- some completed their objectives and some did not), and they have a vague Eldar prophecy that refers to some sort of impending doom in the near future, but they haven't yet connected the two. I'm not sure how long it will be until they do; could be that they end up interrogating the captured Stormtroopers and hear them mention "Dagger," or maybe it won't be until the fleet actually arrives, and they intercept transmissions mentioning "Dagger."
    >> Anonymous 06/10/11(Fri)15:46 No.15220968
    >>15218957

    I wish you'd write for other homebrews as well :(
    >> Not LongPoster... 06/10/11(Fri)17:42 No.15221783
    >>15220968
    I'm afraid I don't know them very well; I'm learning more about them (especially the Emperor's Nightmare), but it will be some time before I feel that I know them as well as I know the Knights.
    >> Anonymous 06/10/11(Fri)18:11 No.15221969
    'Oo noez wot evul lurkz in da hartz off 'umies? Da Green Shadow noez.



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