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  • File : 1306248724.jpg-(105 KB, 750x600, 1289695911564.jpg)
    105 KB Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)10:52 No.15035783  
    can we get a HFY thread going? i've sorta whipped myself into a terror that come 50, hundreds, or thousands of years from now, when humanity finally unites to fight an alien menace it will be a slow, painful defeat...
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)10:54 No.15035797

    It'll probably be a quick and painless vaporized-into-a-cloud-of-antimatter victory\defeat.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)10:55 No.15035804
    If it's any consolation, you'll be long dead and forgotten by then.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)10:56 No.15035812
    a little, yeah
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)10:57 No.15035820
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    really I always assumed it would be "humans reduced to domesticated animal/lab rat" subservience
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)10:58 No.15035823
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    I might as well upload the screencaps from the best ones.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)10:58 No.15035826
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    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)10:59 No.15035829

    Well, that's the option if they don-t find us threatening.

    "Mostly harmless" so to speak.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)10:59 No.15035831
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    >ve sorta whipped myself into a terror about a hypothetical event in the distant future of dubious realism
    Holy fuck you people are fucking stupid. "Humanity Fuck Yeah!" We're better than all those stupid aliens we made up in our stories! Fuck them!

    But, oh no, what if those aliens we made up come back and kill us?! We're doomed! Dooooooooomed!
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)10:59 No.15035832
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    >> -|- Reichsguard -|- !!Q3opPDaKzPo 05/24/11(Tue)10:59 No.15035837
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    If you want to have another HFY going, common decency requires you provide some OC first. Just saying.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)11:00 No.15035841
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    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)11:01 No.15035849
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    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)11:01 No.15035856
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    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)11:08 No.15035905
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    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)11:08 No.15035907
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    >> Loch !!GzWmGH6V4eu 05/24/11(Tue)11:11 No.15035925
    >implying anything human will survive the heat death of the universe
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)11:12 No.15035931
    I remember when there was interesting OC in those threads.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)11:15 No.15035959
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    >implying we'll allow heat death to happen
    >also 3.7 billion other implications implied over the last second
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)11:15 No.15035967
    >Implying the heat death of the universe won't take place millions of years in the future.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)11:16 No.15035976
    Fucking Therians. 4channers, 20 million years into the future. They can troll us so masterfully, our brains implode.

    And they fight entropy. Awesome.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)11:18 No.15035988
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    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)11:20 No.15035998
    >millions of years.

    Technically you are right. But counting with "millions" is like counting the age of the Earth in seconds. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Future_of_an_expanding_universe

    Also, the Therians will win against heat-death
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)12:00 No.15036383

    But compared to the age of the human race it is massive amount of time.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)12:16 No.15036492
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    They fight heat death by building dyson speheres and stuff. Chances of that actually working is...
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)12:23 No.15036543
    Something I typed up in 20 seconds a while back.

    From the audio logs of Hurann Grethunk:

    Our group was handpicked from the best of the best of each race in our alliance. The smartest Kragag, the fastest Urloc, the most nearly invisible Slyarn. We had a cutting edge ship and the best funding we could get while still remaining a secret project. We had enough engine power to bug out to near FTL in under 50 seconds, and to FTL in 2 minutes. We had state of the art stealth technology. Despite all this effort, every last one of us was a poke away from voiding their bowels. Our mission was utter madness. We were going to enter the Veil, and spy on what we believed to be a Human space installation.

    The Veil itself is immaterial. Whatever it is, no sensors can detect it. We've only learned its boundaries by trial and costly error. However, when we passed the border, we all shuddered as the realization hit us. We were in Human territory. If we got caught, we were beyond aid.

    We had to be quick to avoid the effects of the Veil, so we had been inserted not too far from the target, which appeared at this range to be an observation station. A single hangar, one of those damnable Human shield emitters (which our people were furiously trying to counter) and a number of vicious looking spikes that could send all manner of death our way. A chill ran through us all as we neared scanning distance. Hopefully, the stealth tech would work and we could get done without incident.

    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)12:24 No.15036556

    "Hey Bob, get a load of this."

    "What is that? Not like any ship we've seen before."

    "Yeah, it's new I guess. From the lowered emissions I think it's supposed to be stealthed, but we picked it up about 7 minutes ago. We traced the vector and it entered the veil about half an hour ago."

    "Half an hour? A stealth vessel? Those bastards are trying to spy on us."

    "What should we do?"


    Everything was going smoothly. Our sensors were having trouble locking on to the station, but that was expected. A few more minutes and we could begin the scans. Then, our ship's lights flashed red and the captain's display flashed warning signs. We had just been pinged.

    A ping is a detection method, much like a sonar ping. It's a definite "we know you're there" and when we realized what it was, half the crew really did void their bowels. The captain ordered an immediate turn around and the mission was scrapped. We escaped to FTL in record time, but even that success was dampened by the failure of our mission.

    Our superiors will not be pleased.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)12:31 No.15036615
    gonna leave it at humans just pissing on the superiority of aliens, or continue?
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)12:35 No.15036651
    That's all I've written.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)12:36 No.15036659
    The first HFY story I ever read was a novel in one of those anthology paperbacks, where humans had been extinct following a supernova exploding near the Earth, which eradicated all life on it. Aliens discovered the Earth, found old crumbling bones and resurrected one human from them. But he was capable of teleportation, mind reading and a whole lots of other feats. Aliens tried to flee in their ship and destroy the resurrecting device but failed and actually allowed the lone human to revive his race and gave him the means to expand beyond the Earth. He even convinced them they had to sacrifice themselves and their ship even though he had actually already stolen the plans both for the ship and the resurrecting device.

    And now, humans were back, could cross space, resurrect themselves and nobody knew of them...
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)12:37 No.15036665
    Technically the heat death will take place after at least 10^100 years. I used millions because humanity (at least as we know it) is going to be dead by then.
    Veil of Madness, fuck yeah!
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)12:53 No.15036838
    Veil of Madness sounds like a really awesome rpg setting.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)13:25 No.15037153
    It's going to happen a lot sooner than that. With the exception of black holes and a few other exotic objects, basically none of the structures that we see in the universe will survive a trillion years. Supermassive black holes will last a while longer, but once they evaporate, that's basically it for the universe as we know it, no more meaningful interactions after that.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)13:28 No.15037187
    Black holes gather and condense "entropized" matter, and then reach a critical mass and explode in a new big bang.

    No heat death.

    This is my theory.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)13:31 No.15037215

    Well if you use the short scale trillion (10^12) it's going to take a bit longer, star formation will cease in 100 trillion years and some of the current red dwarf stars will survive ten trillion years.

    Decay of all nucleons starts in 10^34 years etc.

    This is assuming there is such thing as proton decay. If there isn't, the universe lasts quite a bit longer.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)14:02 No.15037532

    Your theory is bullshit unbacked by modern cosmology.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)14:04 No.15037559
    Black holes gather all matter around them and condense them tightly into a single space.

    What happens when they've accumulated more mass than their gravitational field can hold?
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)14:06 No.15037578
    Starting a new Veil story (it's my favorite). Here's what I've got so far.

    "Nevertheless, Aarasay, the decision of the court is made. You will be the envoy."

    And with those words, my fate was sealed.


    My name Is Aarasay (A-ah-ra-say). I am a Slyarn. My kind is known for being lithe and agile,

    and we have a kind of natural camoflague that lets us blend in with our immediate surroundings.

    We have the basic bilateral symmetry that is so common amongst the sapient species. Two arms,

    two legs, one head. We're taller than most species, with only the Knudran and the Scroy being

    taller. And the Humans.

    Humans. They're the entire reason that my life has been turned upside down. Until today, I was

    the respectable ambassador of one of my people's worlds to the 3rd Arm Council of Species, a

    cooperative effort of various species to work together for mutual benefit. It was perhaps because

    of my respectability, and seeming inability to offend, that I was chosen for this mission.

    "It has been nearly thirty years since the Supremacy Incident, and we have only the slightest of

    diplomatic relations with the Humans. Given their obvious technological superiority, and their

    ability to survive in the Veil, this is intolerable. For the good of all species, we must strive to make

    a more firm contact and establish a good rapport..."
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)14:06 No.15037586
    >H:FY! thread
    >old ass screencaps, screencaps everywhere
    >repost of a repost of a respost, but it's H:FY! so it's alright.

    Why do people still do this? Does humanity really need a circle jerk because we're super special and amazing? These threads suck, without fail, so why are you bringing them back?
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)14:07 No.15037598
    Fucking notepad and your bullshit formatting.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)14:07 No.15037605
    Trying again.

    "Nevertheless, Aarasay, the decision of the court is made. You will be the envoy."

    And with those words, my fate was sealed.


    My name Is Aarasay (A-ah-ra-say). I am a Slyarn. My kind is known for being lithe and agile, and we have a kind of natural camouflage that lets us blend in with our immediate surroundings. We have the basic bilateral symmetry that is so common amongst the sapient species. Two arms, two legs, one head. We're taller than most species, with only the Knudran and the Scroy being taller. And the Humans.

    Humans. They're the entire reason that my life has been turned upside down. Until today, I was the respectable ambassador of one of my people's worlds to the 3rd Arm Council of Species, a cooperative effort of various species to work together for mutual benefit. It was perhaps because of my respectability, and seeming inability to offend, that I was chosen for this mission.

    "It has been nearly thirty years since the Supremacy Incident, and we have only the slightest of diplomatic relations with the Humans. Given their obvious technological superiority, and their ability to survive in the Veil, this is intolerable. For the good of all species, we must strive to make a more firm contact and establish a good rapport..."
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)14:07 No.15037608
    It grows bigger. And gains more gravitational force since F = GMm/r^2 where r = distance from mass 1, M is mass 1 and m is mass 2 (G = gravitational constant).
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)14:08 No.15037618
    The representatives droned on about good-will, trade deals, technology transfers (unlikely) and so on. I listened as the politicians got caught up in their own talking, and started considering more and more offensive deals, even adding hidden clauses to the original documents. I had to speak out against their greed. I stood up.

    "Representatives of the Species, I understand that this is an unprecedented event and that we are all excited to attempt a diplomatic contact, I am myself eager to see peaceful overtures made, but we must remember that we know next to nothing about Humans, and so our first deals should be as generous and acceptable as possible to avoid any... misunderstandings, especially in light of previous Human contact."

    There was silence. Gods above, there was total silence for ten minutes and I had nothing else to say while every representative in the room stared at me. Finally, there was a quick deliberation and one of the Organizers spoke:

    "Representative Aarasay brings up an important point. We should not let our personal quirks or interests get in the way of a successful contact. I move that Representative Aarasay be named Diplomatic Envoy for this mission." The movement was followed by a chorus of "second!"s throughout the chamber.

    No words. My eyes opened wide in shock and my body wouldn't answer my commands, if I had any to give. I finally snapped myself into action. After a choking false start, I enunciated properly: "Honored Organizer, surely you jest. I have no experience dealing with Humans, I've never been aboard one of their ships or on one of their worlds..."

    "Nevertheless, Aarasay, the decision of the court is made. You will be the envoy."




    Thoughts? Critique? Where should I take it?
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)14:16 No.15037712
    feels a bit redundant given that you already laid out why the guy got named ambassador in >>15037618
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)14:19 No.15037746
    Eh, I felt it was an attention-grabber. I'll remove it then.
    >> Magus O'Grady 05/24/11(Tue)14:23 No.15037774
    Roll with it. Solid beginning. I'd take it down a culture shock path. He gets to human territory, visits earth, with all it's flaws and foibles, and eventually comes to understand who we are and why we play the villain like we do. He 'goes native' and returns to the council to help further the 'cosmic boogeyman' act. That's how I'd take it, anyway. It's your story, feel free to ignore my advice.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)14:54 No.15038167
    rape, its the only way.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)15:23 No.15038509
    >Implying that consensual sex is not an option
    >> 008 05/24/11(Tue)16:45 No.15039395
    I don't know, HFY has it's ups and downs. A lot of it is just pure human wank but there are some gems. Some of my favorites are the Veil setting because it's hilarious and the one where humanity is total bros for a race of homeless gypsy avians and sets them up on Mars. But that one kind of turned into xenoporn at the end if I recall right.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)16:56 No.15039498
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    >Turned into xeno porn

    Oh god what.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)17:05 No.15039565
    never heard of this, someone post?
    >> Someone else. !!Qb2aRW+wCPO 05/24/11(Tue)17:06 No.15039574
    The Veil setting is pretty great.

    I should get around to making an entry in the Veil setting. Or a sequel to Journal of an Alien Diplomat.

    I'm not even sure how I would do that, the story is so self-contained. It's like Portal: the sequel could be mechanically great, but is there even room for it?
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)17:10 No.15039606
    The one with the Avnari had some more stuff written for it here, if'n ye be interested: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/13058706/
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)17:37 No.15039788
    Have you ever seen a human? No, not the ones they show you on the vids, those are stupid looking. Like, a real human?

    They're fucking massive. Six feet tall is average for them. You know the muscles we have in our tentactles? Yeah, well, the humans have the same kinds, except their muscles are attached to these things they have called bones.

    What? Oh, they're like solid chunks of chitin except on the inside. Yeah, gross, right?

    Seriously, though, these guys don't fuck around. Every part of their body is a weapon, I've seen pics from the War. Those bones I told you about? Well, they have them in their manipulators, they call them "hands".

    Their hands got these things called "knuckles". Sounds funny, right? I saw a human push his knuckles right through some poor bastard's brain pod.

    They've got strength and brutality, that's for sure, but they've got smarts too.

    I heard they developed space travel using a ship made from clay. Can you believe that? Get this, in less than 60 years, they'd not only developed an intrasystem ship but also colonial technology.

    Humans, man. Fucking scary.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)17:37 No.15039790
    Well in the veil setting (assuming I remember correctly) The humans had no real problems with other alien races and were actually searching for some. You could have the story focus on alien races trying to penetrate the veil in an attempt at exploration. From their you could take the story in one of two directions.

    We begin to see the slow fall into madness on the alien ship due to the oddity of space beyond the veil that causes non-humans to go insane. You could write it in journals following the thoughts of the captain or some other member of the crew and show that the inhabitants of the ship are slowly descending into madness. Ending with the humans finding the hollow shell of the ship and launching it back into alien space as a "warning" not to go beyond the veil (after keeping a few bodies for study on what causes the veils effects.)

    Or you could have the aliens be immune and begin colonization of planets beyond the veil to be welcomed by humans.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)18:06 No.15039981
    2nd idea is the opposite of what the veil setting is all about. 1st idea is fine.

    Also, I started writing a HFY story then halfway through realized it really doesn't fit the HFY theme <_>
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)18:31 No.15040154
    1. if it's good write it anyway

    2. the reason I put the second option there is to say that there is a new race that can survive beyond the veil. You could then write about how humans interact with the first alien species to live in the veil. Due to the aliens being able to go anywhere in the galaxy they want the humans can't possibly keep up the image of horrifying monster so we would be able to explore how humans conduct politics with a species that cant be fooled into believing that humans are some sort of sadistic monsters.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)18:43 No.15040224
    I'll keep it short and 4chan.

    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)19:09 No.15040374
    Have him succeed, after a fashion.
    Have someone admit to him that the whole 'cosmic boogyman' thing is just us screwing with the rest of the universe.
    And give him a meal. I want to know how the rest of the universe reacts to our food.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)19:27 No.15040510
    Can someone give me an overview of the established races in the Veil setting?
    I get the basic premise, and I like it, but I don't know much about the other races.
    >> Magus O'Grady 05/24/11(Tue)19:36 No.15040590
    IIRc it's a lot like medieval Europe. Lots of small kingdoms. Lots of borders means lots of border skirmishes, and lots of competition for limited resources. Humans had lots of time, space, resoures, and privacy to develop because of the Veil of Madness. Any sentient entering or evolving in the veil would slowly go mad and self-destruct in a suicidal frenzy. Humans were immune because we're all a little insane to start with. So we spread out along inhabitable worlds that nobody else can get to. Then we finally breach the edge of the galactic version of the Bermuda Triangle and acidentally run right into the middle of a border skirmish between two paranoid races.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)19:40 No.15040608
    Why do i feel like whenever mankind ventures outside our solar system we will find an alien artifact which essentially surmounts to a sing saying "DON'T GO NEAR THESE FUCKERS! THEY ARE BLOODY CRAZY!"
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)19:41 No.15040619
    Because it suits your escapist fantasies.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)19:44 No.15040643
    They would have no reason to fear us until AT LEAST the point where we can venture out on our own anyway just due to the technology gap.

    It would be far more likely to find a "developing world, do not disturb" beacon than a warning beacon about some mammals that can't even live on their own moon yet.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)20:11 No.15040893
    did anyone save that story about that xeno-human joint combat operation? i remember the xeno being scared almost shitless about the capabilites of the human body when they need exo-skeletons to even fight
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)20:21 No.15040990
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)20:25 No.15041039
    I like the stories that have humans reacting to an overt threat or otherwise acting in awesome self preservation like


    Rather than "lol unstoppable wave of destruction" like

    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)20:42 No.15041184
    For some reason I always picture aliens being surprised by how little sexual dimorphism we have when I think of meeting other races.

    Since most of the ones people imagine don't seem to come from mammals especially.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)20:46 No.15041230

    That's a pretty good point.

    Even if the aliens are mammals they'd probably be (superficially) surprised by our lack of sexual dimorphism. We can tell the difference between a man and a woman pretty easily, even if they're making an attempt to look like the other. But trying to quickly tell the difference between a male and female dog/cat/whatever is pretty hard unless you have a full on view of the genitals.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)20:47 No.15041246
    Well, creatures need to be extremely close genetically to reproduce. Chimpanzees, which are 99.5% (or some ridiculous number like that) similar to us look wildly different and can't reproduce with us. So, any creature's opposite gender will look remarkably similar, because they'll share enough genetics to reproduce.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)20:51 No.15041282

    You generally see a much greater difference between genders in non-mammals (and even quite a bit in some branches of mammals).

    I just always find it odd, especially when the races seems to have insect, reptile, or avian-like traits.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)20:51 No.15041283

    A lot of creatures on earth have extreme sexual dimorphism. Ants, for example, and the angler fish.

    A sufficiently alien.... alien might have a society made up entirely of males, with house sized females with vaginas for doors, for example.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)20:53 No.15041307
    You mean 'amounts', not 'surmounts'.
    To surmount something is to overcome it.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)21:01 No.15041388
    "Violence-Capable Sophont Clades" would be a fuckawesome name for a band.
    >> Trust Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)21:16 No.15041533
    Of course, everyone knows how the humans were discovered. A quiet little backwater once lay in the middle of the Iovar Confederation, in a region that fickle race had only just got up the patience to explore. The humans had a nice little empire there, and a few little vassal races to call their own. They thought they were the strongest, and the Iovar proved them wrong.

    The subjugation of humankind took three decades. Three decades of hell. The humans fought bravely, but pointlessly. They were hopelessly outmatched, and completely without hope. The remainder of the Species Union watched as the Iovar enslaved them, world by world. The Confederation's actions were denounced, and sanctions leveled, but no-one stopped them. It would have taken a war to change their minds, and why would we risk that, for a mere hundred billion in a place nobody ever heard of?

    For the next few centuries, the humans remained in slavery. They were physically unimpressive, with poor reflexes, poor strength, poor durability, just about every disadvantage it was possible to give a race. But they were smart, charismatic, naturally clever. The perfect diplomats. Within fifty years, a third of all Iovar merchants had a human liaison. It took ten more years for that figure to rise to 90%. The humans had taken to their role marvelously well. It took very little to keep them in line, and it came to be accepted by the Iovar, and then by others, that humans were simply natural slaves.

    All the defiance of the subjugation was forgotten. The humans integrated fully with the Iovar, still in slavery, but trusted above all others. In only two hundred years, the entire race inserted itself in the public consciousness as the perfect companion. They would never betray a secret, never cheat, never lie for anyone but their master. Subservient to a fault, absolutely loyal, and easy to trust. Trust. Trust. It always came back to trust.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)21:17 No.15041545
    It was absurdly easy. All but the barest, fringe suspicions of humankind had been erased, in only four hundred years. The Iovar were complacent, too in love with this blessed arrangement to notice the knives sliding into their backs. The Confederation drew further and further back from the Union, becoming insular and guarded. It became rare to see an Iovar at all, much less one outside a protected ship or compound. All outside business was handled by humans, as the Iovar were content to stay behind with their wealth.

    Inside the Confederation, the Iovar simply ceased to be. Nearly all communication was handled either by humans or through humans. They were driven further and further back, never noticing anything was wrong, as their entire culture was manipulated into suicide. The last Iovar died making a bid on a Centarian vase, from the safety of his penthouse loft in the capital city. With a whimper, the conquerors of man fell at last.

    We know this now only because they have told us. We, the last millions of our species, the last remnant of the Union. There is nothing we can do, for the humans have taken all that we control. Our cages are beautiful and gilded, but they are still cages. We want for nothing, we have all that we desire, but we do not have freedom, and we will never have it again.

    I still hear the echoes of that man's voice, the words he spoke to me as he escorted me from my home.

    “You're all just so goddamn gullible.”
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)21:34 No.15041692
    'We lost the contract father'

    'What? You oaf! All you had to do was to inform them that the shipment was on time. A very simple errand-'

    'They knew the shipment wasn't on time'

    'We have worked very hard to keep them out of the docks. They couldn't possibly have known'

    'But they did, father. They were perfectly happy at first, but when I told them that the shipment was on time, they just looked at each other and told me to repeat what I said, but this time to speak the reality of the situation'

    'Impossible. They must have spies within your retinue. You foo-'

    'If I may interject, my lord.'
    Another creature, missing one of the 4 main appendages that the Truepeople are known for, padded towards the throne.

    'Your son is not at fault. He wasn't to know.'
    'I've met humans before. Many of the Third Stage races sent forces to the Tannhauser Gates, including the humans. The commanders tried to keep the contingents apart, as interspecies relations can become... strained, especially under threat of war. There's always going to be some though, who want to mingle, especially after being confined to barracks for months.'

    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)21:36 No.15041713

    'I was in a game of shkkit, you know, the one the naomar play with the coloured sticks. Me, a couple of other Truepeople, a human, some Naomar, and this big Kadd were playing.
    Anyway, half way through the game the Kadd puts his sticks down and says he won the trick. But the human just looks at him and tells him he didn't. Tells him to show us the rest of his sticks. Well, you know what those Kadd are like, and it kicks off. Took me and two Naomar to hold the Kadd down. We look at his sticks and sure enough, he had three greens.'

    'But there are only two greens in a pack' said the son.

    'Exactly. He was cheating. And the Human knew'

    'How-' spluttered the father.

    'Don't ask me how it works, but Humans know when you aren't being completely up front with the facts. They can do it with their own kind a little, one told me, but I guess they've adapted to hide whatever it is that gives the rest of us away'

    'My advice to you is, my Lord, to only do business with humans via audio. That seems to help, but it isn't a sure thing'
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)21:37 No.15041717
    People still do it because it was fun once before faggots like you shit them up.
    >> Someone else. !!Qb2aRW+wCPO 05/24/11(Tue)22:45 No.15042482
    Aw, what the hell. I'll write some Veil.

    Faggotry, go!
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)22:46 No.15042500
    Faggotry, ho!
    >> Someone else. !!Qb2aRW+wCPO 05/24/11(Tue)22:51 No.15042564
    Oh wow this is fun.
    I'm afraid it might get a bit long, but then again, that's what I'm good at, my faggotry is long and thick.

    Too much?
    >> The Veil of Madness, Torn Someone else. !!Qb2aRW+wCPO 05/24/11(Tue)22:54 No.15042590
    The atmosphere in the lecture hall was normal. Some students buzzed and whispered. Some texted or chatted on cell-u-voxes. A few even had notebooks out, and they were the minority. The Professor stepped up to the lectern, and the room grew quieter.
    “All right, guys, I have an announcement to make first and foremost,” the aging Grestonian said, and the room got a bit quieter at that. Professor Snar’drik was a stickler for procedure. “Today’s lecture on human contact is cancelled. Before the whole classroom unites in celebration,” he added, glaring pointedly at two students who had already grabbed their bags, “I have arranged for an expert in the field, Doctor Ulor Tilol of the Union Diplomatic Exchange, to teach the lesson for me. Doctor?” he asked, nodding respectfully and stepping off the stage.
    The classroom buzz got a bit louder as a tall, slender being in a white vacuum suit got up and clumsily walked up onto the stage. It stood before the podium and raised its golden visor to face the assembled students.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)22:55 No.15042602
    Naw, at one point these threads were/became as bad as elf fanboys. Humans became Mary Sues that could do anything and were super special unique and could win over everything.
    >> Someone else. !!Qb2aRW+wCPO 05/24/11(Tue)22:59 No.15042640
    “Good afternoon,” the person said, sliding a small storage stick into the lectern’s data slot. “My name is Doctor Ulor Tilol, and I’m a Contact Specialist at the Union Diplomatic Exchange. I think the professor may have already told you, in fact,” making an exaggerated gesture at the teacher. A few students snickered.
    “Today, I’ll be covering a few points on the first contact between the humans and, well, more or less everybody else. The story’s been retold in popular fiction dozens of times, each tale more exaggerated and inaccurate than the last. I don’t know if you’ve covered this or not, class, but there’s this miraculous, magical time period, within which all portrayals of a historic event are completely wrong. I dare to hope that that time has passed for what Humans call the First Contact Incident, and what at least a few of the more media-conscious of you probably call the Soopremetchy War.”
    Several Media Relations students laughed out loud, while the rest of the audience looked confused.
    >> Someone else. !!Qb2aRW+wCPO 05/24/11(Tue)23:04 No.15042650
    I hope you like being wrong. You're sure good at it.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)23:08 No.15042698
    I'll drawfag to the best of my poor abilities. And when I say poor, dont be surprised when it comes out crap. I just got a wacom tablet for my birthday and it came with photoshop so any suggestions i will take. But anyways I'll try and do what i can
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)23:08 No.15042704
    I would suppose that this story takes place a couple of decades after first contact. Although he says that the story has been told and retold multiple times. I seems entirely possible that the multiple generations could have passed.
    >> Someone else. !!Qb2aRW+wCPO 05/24/11(Tue)23:09 No.15042714
    The room darkened and the projector flicked on, a hologram floating into the center of the viewing dome. It was the region of space known as the Veil of Madness, a block of the galaxy that nobody but the Humans could inhabit safely. The map slowly zoomed in until all the class could see was one side of the roughly cubical region. Several red dots appeared where human ships had engaged in piracy, several dozen more turned bright blue to indicate where native civilizations had succumbed to the Madness and killed themselves off, and one orange, blinking light appeared where the first contact between Humans and the rest of the galaxy had occurred.
    The visiting Doctor pointed each significant dot out in turn. When he arrived at the last one, the site of the Supremacy’s accidental combat action, he took care to point it out. “Class, does anyone know which of the…maybe fifty stars visible in this one single view are the Human Alpha worlds, the ones where the Humans have the core of their mining and colonization efforts?”
    A few raised voices mumbled out answers, while one or two people raised appendages. The visiting lecturer pointed to one of these more respectful students, and she raised her voice to be heard. “None of them.”
    “Precisely, ma’am, well done,” the Doctor said, gesturing at the controls. The view zoomed back out, until the entire Veil was visible. The Doctor pointed a finger at the heart of the Veil and a red spotting laser emerged. A few star systems turned yellow when the beam touched them. “It’s these ones, here at the center of the Veil. Probably the most heavily defended stars in the universe. Each has the equivalent of five Union patrol fleets in its outer defense circuit, and a full Union Battlegroup in planetary defense.”
    >> Someone else. !!Qb2aRW+wCPO 05/24/11(Tue)23:10 No.15042720
    Well, it's been thirty human years since >>15035856
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)23:11 No.15042740
    Me, figured I'd use a tripfag
    >> NewGuy !2Cy8xshhoE 05/24/11(Tue)23:14 No.15042763
    Damn now my tripfag name should work
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)23:14 No.15042764
    Elf fanboys have been mythological creatures for more than two decades now.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)23:16 No.15042786
    You are completely wrong. See "army of elf girls wat do" a short time ago.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)23:17 No.15042793
    What's this one, option 1 or 2?
    >> Someone else. !!Qb2aRW+wCPO 05/24/11(Tue)23:18 No.15042801
    The room came to life with unsettled buzzes. A full Battlegroup would be enough to seize complete and uncontested control of any star system in the universe thus far, no question. The Doctor didn’t seem to mind the noise, talking right through it. “This is not to say the Humans use the fleets in actual warfare, quite the opposite. Before the first contact, Humans used these weapons mostly on each other. Some fought pirates, some fought insurrections…the same as literally every single sentient race in the universe, really. The difference is that the Humans never had a moderating force, something to slow them down. And, of course, their brains were stewing in the raw stuff of Madness the whole time.”
    Another student raised a hand, and the doctor pointed to him. “Yes?”
    “Doctor, are the Humans building these fleets to attack someone?” he asked.
    “Oh, certainly not,” the Doctor said, waving his hand at the starmap. Several hundred stars turned an aqua green, and several were overlaid with the homes of dead civilizations. “The umans have so many more star lanes to protect than anyone else that most of their fleet assets are spent keeping pirates and raiders at bay.”
    “Who would rob Humans?” the student asked in surprise.
    “Why, each other,” the Doctor said. He tapped the ‘forward’ key on the tablet a few times, and a picture of a human raider frigate, with hideous, empty eye sockets leaking blood painted on the prow. Several students recoiled. “The vast majority of human raiders hit one another or Human Aerospace Merchant Marine freighters. The vessel that made first contact with the Union, the Supremacy, was a powerful ship, for its time, but the Humans have since created dedicated diplomatic vessels that don’t even have anything heavier than anti-asteroid beams.”
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)23:19 No.15042812
    I'm the guy who posted the "options" earlier and it seems that he is going in an entirely different direction.

    both of my "options" had to do with aliens entering the veil and either discovering they had the ability to resist insanity or a log of them falling into insanity.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)23:19 No.15042813
    One of these days I'm going to find an HFY thread and do some recruiting for a game of 3:16, aka "HFY the RPG."
    >> Someone else. !!Qb2aRW+wCPO 05/24/11(Tue)23:19 No.15042816
    You mean between these two?
    Neither. I'm not going to be constrained between two arbitrary choices.
    >> NewGuy !2Cy8xshhoE 05/24/11(Tue)23:21 No.15042826
    I'm going to do my best to draw that skull ship....
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)23:21 No.15042831
    Aren't all human ships supposed to be huge? Like, Xbox huge?
    >> Someone else. !!Qb2aRW+wCPO 05/24/11(Tue)23:23 No.15042850
    They are huge. The Supremacy was larger than any alien ship in space at the time, seven mile keel. The raiders are about...half a kilometer long, maybe? They're meant for hit-and fade.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)23:23 No.15042853
    of course not what gave you that idea.

    The supremacy was the single largest human ship created. Probably the only ships of its class and it was 7 miles in length iirc.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)23:26 No.15042882
    Later stories said that all human ships were purpose made to be huge. Generally, they just mounted a massive superstructure on a smaller ship.
    >> Someone else. !!Qb2aRW+wCPO 05/24/11(Tue)23:27 No.15042885
    “In fact, I rode one of those ships here,” the Doctor continued, eliciting an excited murmuring from the students. None of them seemed to be willing to ask aloud, so the Doctor supplied the answer to the obvious question. “They’re cramped. Really cramped. Very nice to ride in, smooth-moving and quiet, but no room for frills and decoration; Humans prioritize efficiency over aesthetics, given the cost of an Envoy Cruiser.”
    The Doctor clicked back to the starmap. “One thing that colored Human impressions of First Contact,” he said, “was that Humans had actually encountered non-Humans before. Here,” he gestured at the star map, and the hologram zoomed it rapidly to a single star system. “This world had living inhabitants.”
    “Did the Humans destroy them?” one student asked eagerly. The Doctor seemed to draw his head back in surprise.
    “Goodness, no, no, of course not,” he said, shaking his head under the helmet. “Humans had dreamed of First Contact for over a thousand years. They were delighted to meet other races. The problem was with the non-Humans, not the Humans.” A few students nodded knowingly.
    “They had the Madness, didn’t they?” one student asked. The Doctor nodded.
    “They did indeed. They were utterly insane, their peoples collapsing into anarchy and cannibalism.”
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)23:27 No.15042890
    to put that into perspective a standard nimitz class aircraft carrier is about a fifth of a mile in length.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)23:29 No.15042914
    Oh I only have the original veil story and the troll story where the human representative sits in on a movie
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)23:29 No.15042918
    My only problem with this writefaggotry is that he somehow knows that humans mean nobody any harm.
    >> Someone else. !!Qb2aRW+wCPO 05/24/11(Tue)23:30 No.15042923
    He flew here on a Human ship, why assume he hasn't met any?
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)23:32 No.15042952
    >implying the representative isnt a human in a less intimidating suit.

    or at least it seems this way to me. The humans have decided that the facade of cruelty that they use has gone on too long. Now they wish to show the rest of the galaxy that they are peaceful and wish no one harm. The speaker is actually a human without the aliens knowing.
    >> NewGuy !2Cy8xshhoE 05/24/11(Tue)23:32 No.15042954
    Um, romeo and juliet story with a raider and alien captain or someshit.
    >> United Malaysia 05/24/11(Tue)23:34 No.15042970
    Someone else! My favorite writefag, I loved reading what you wrote for Emperesque. The sheer volume you were able to write was prdogious
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)23:36 No.15042995
    It's a bear, I mean human in disguise.

    Also, my god we have Veil apocrypha already.
    >> Someone else. !!Qb2aRW+wCPO 05/24/11(Tue)23:37 No.15043002
    “The Humans,” the Doctor said, clicking back to the view of the entire explored universe, rather than just the Veil, “had absolutely no desire to harm these alien beings. Why would they? They were rapidly destroying themselves. The Humans pressed on, finding hundreds of worlds like their own Terra, worlds that could have easily supported sentient life, but didn’t. Remember, these were a people steeped in the Veil. They had no idea that the area in which they evolved was verboten. They thought it was totally normal. If the Veil has a physical presence, the Humans, to this day, can’t detect it. That’s why cartographic missions are so dangerous: the only way to find the edge of the Veil is to get close to it and try not to go crazy before you have a chance to fly home again. Unpleasant, but there you go.”
    “Moving on, we come to the First Contact event the Humans of today refer to the Incident,” the Doctor said, clicking to the slide between the Veil/Universe map and the raider ship. I gigantic, oblong chunk of metal appeared, with the words Supremacy highlighted at the bottom of the slide, next to a tiny Kondar patrol vessel for scale. “The Kondar Navy had just fried a few Silvun pirate vessels when a Human Dreadnought, the Supremacy, emerged from FTL nearly on top of the smaller vessel. The Kondar gunners panicked – not without reason – and fired on the Human ship. The Human ship had lowered its shields, to create a more passive stance, hoping to avoid conflict. The Kondar ship killed the Human crewers before the Supremacy managed to get its shield back up.”
    The image turned to a video of the two vessels moving. The Kondar ship fired. The Supremacy took a single broadside hit, and a tiny flare of red appeared on its side. Several seconds later, a massive beam of purple, the size of an entire Silvun Fleet Command Ship, appeared between the Supremacy and another Kondar ship that was fleeing the battle.
    >> NobodyInParticular !!PdyTLmgrbwc 05/24/11(Tue)23:38 No.15043007
    Six. There were six humans that had survived the initial, secondary, and tertiary defenses the battle cruiser had in place to protect itself from unwanted boarders. They had lost nearly a third of their fleet in attempts to take down the cruiser, over fifty thousand lives lost, and only a meager handful had managed to make their way onto an eight-class warship that had a reputation of annihilating entire races. There were hundreds of Qualoth battalions on board, and humans were notorious for having millions of ships exterminated with laughing ease over the course of the war. When the computer network had detected only six lifeforms that managed to enter into the vessel, the Qualoth, known as the most aggressive and brutal warmakers in the history of the universe, had very nearly decided to make sport of it rather than stomp over the humans as was their trademark.

    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)23:38 No.15043013
    The Doctor's name is 'lol i trol u' backwards. In keeping with the previous Veil continuation, where the human was T. Rolfaec (Trollface), it's pretty obvious that the Doctor is in fact, a human.
    >> Someone else. !!Qb2aRW+wCPO 05/24/11(Tue)23:42 No.15043061
         File1306294972.jpg-(57 KB, 255x255, 1287880333340.jpg)
    57 KB
    Really? Hadn't noticed.
    >> NewGuy !2Cy8xshhoE 05/24/11(Tue)23:44 No.15043074
    Why can't my hands do art!
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)23:44 No.15043081
         File1306295094.jpg-(46 KB, 204x156, floor guard.jpg)
    46 KB
    >> Someone else. !!Qb2aRW+wCPO 05/24/11(Tue)23:47 No.15043106
    Suddenly, the room was filled with a horrible, garbled mess of primitive phonetic sounds. Several students clapped their appendages over their aural glands before the Doctor fidgeted with the controls and the sounds died down. “All that time,” the Doctor said, “the Human Captain was broadcasting over and over that he didn’t want any trouble. The Kondar didn’t understand, of course…and who blames them? The Humans had a language that no non-Human had ever heard. This recording was taken from the sensor logs of the Kondar ships that survived, by the by. Congratulations. The Humans had to make a few diplomatic concessions to get this declassified.” Several students looked suitably impressed. Everybody knew that Humans were unnervingly patient negotiators.
    The Doctor skipped past the end of the video, and the raider ship on the next slide, to a picture of a Human battlesuit. It had been marred with several huge blast wounds; black crusts of blood were visible around two of the holes. Several Xenomedical Sciences students glanced at each other. Human blood had iron in it, didn’t it? And got hard when it dried?
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)23:47 No.15043107
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)23:48 No.15043124
    >I don't want no trabble.
    >> Someone else. !!Qb2aRW+wCPO 05/24/11(Tue)23:55 No.15043192
    “The Humans seized on the opportunity, sending a ship to the Kondar home world, with all of its weapons replaced with shield generators and projectors, so that there was no way the Kondar could harm them before they had a chance to talk.” The battlesuit was replaced with a several-second, looping video of another identical suit sprinting across a battlefield, shrapnel bouncing off its plates like feathers. The suit’s wearer vaulted a two-meter barrier as its joints turned red, before landing next to the camera. The camera-holder dropped the camera and ran, as the Human raised a palm, fingers curled, and pointed it next to the camera. A burst of blue fluid appeared, streaming from the Human’s palm. After a moment, the Human cut the stream, and accidentally kicked the camera as it walked by, turning it to point at a Vench-a, its body encased in the blue fluid from the waist down. It fumbled over, trying to pull its sidearm from the muck. It succeeded, and pointed it at its head. Several students gasped.
    Before the Vench-a could pull the trigger, a familiar stream of blue goo appeared, freezing the hand in place. The Human walked up and, seemingly very carefully, disentangled the gun from the hapless soldier’s gooey hand. It tossed the gun over its shoulder with casual contempt, and then slapped a blinking red object, the size of a coin, into the blue mess. A beam of red light appeared from off-camera, in the sky, and hit the Vench-a. It started to levitate into the air, and hung in place for a second. After a moment, it shot into the air like a geyser, and even though the video was silent, the audience could nearly hear it screaming.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/11(Tue)23:58 No.15043231

    >humans abduct aliens
    >all is right with the universe
    >> NewGuy !2Cy8xshhoE 05/25/11(Wed)00:01 No.15043266
    sombebody please screen cap this or archive it? So many things to draw so little talent to do it with,
    >> Someone else. !!Qb2aRW+wCPO 05/25/11(Wed)00:02 No.15043272
    The Human looked around, as if searching for something, then spotted the camera. It leaned over, tilting its head this way and that, before apparently realizing what it was seeing. It took a few deliberate steps towards the view point, before a hail of black objects slammed into the suit from somewhere else. The Human flew backward and slammed into the wall it had just vaulted, several molten holes appearing in its matte black surface. The Human rebounded fast, but it was too late: the wall collapsed on it, crushing it instantly. A few moments later, a terrified Vench- a soldier appeared, shakily keeping the prostrate Human covered. Some more troops walked up, looking baffled, as the first soldier gingerly pried off the helmet. The Human soldier’s skin was decorated oddly, with an unnatural purple zig-zag haircut, and several pieces of metal lodged in its nose in a decorative pattern. It looked female, but who could tell with Humans?
    Several audience members looked like they were going to be sick. The slide mercifully finished, and started looping. The Doctor went back to the slide of the damaged Human suit, highlighting several dark colors in a pattern on its shell. “The Kondar weren’t convinced by the Human diplomats. Why should they have been? The Human pirates and raiders immediately started capturing aliens for study, completely without United Terran Alliance approval. Though the UTA immediately returned the captured people and slaughtered the pirates, the damage had been done: between the disaster of First Contact, the Kondar spreading rumors about how the Human ship had come and gone from the Veil, and the activity of the Human criminals, Humanity was seen as evil incarnate.”
    >> NobodyInParticular !!PdyTLmgrbwc 05/25/11(Wed)00:03 No.15043282
    Even as the humans were making their way through the initial docking bay the security detail on the ship had activated, and blast doors thicker than most buildings prevented the humans from making their way into the ship. In order to maximize the efficiency of what the Qualoths considered to be pest removal, the on-board speakers assured the small group that their destruction was imminent and that they were surrounded. It calmly informed them that there were no less than an entire company of Qualoth soldiers surrounding the room alone, and that the only way any significant tactical advancements could be made was to move through sections of the cruiser that contained four battalions of the most elite Qualoth warriors. In a quiet monotone, they were told that they were stranded on a ship with a quarter of a million of the most feared fighters in this or any galaxies and possessed only substandard armor, substandard weapons, substandard physiology, using substandard tactics and hailed from a substandard space. It reminded them of the numerous slaughters that the most advanced human warships had suffered at the hands of the smallest Qualoth crusades.

    An individual Qualoth was well over twice the size of a human and the race had experienced wars that spanned longer than the entire human history. One of the most feared position any race could find itself in would an advancing fleet above a homeworld, and if it were not for the almost insect-like proliferation of the humans the Qualoth would have long destroyed Earth in a single fiery bombardment.

    Rather than risk a few possible injuries, the Qualoth determined that the best course of action would simply be to drain the hangar of air and allow the humans to asphyxiate quietly, after a few minutes of grim contemplation of their error.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)00:07 No.15043304
    Showing humans?

    Definitely apocrypha.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)00:10 No.15043343
    Is there a reason not to do it now?
    >> Someone else. !!Qb2aRW+wCPO 05/25/11(Wed)00:13 No.15043365
    “Human diplomats, however, were determined to be seen as no such thing. The Humans immediately descended on Union representatives, offering all sorts of gifts and diplomatic concessions. At first,” the Doctor continued, shocking the assembled students. “The Humans even offered to take some Kondar observers to the Courts-Martial Tribune, to see the Captain of the Supremacy stand trial. They were baffled by the horrified refusal of the Kondar representatives. Remember, class…the Humans didn’t understand that there was a Veil at all.” The Doctor changed the slide again, and this time, it was the Picoelectric Engineering students’ turn to look interested. A blueprint of a ludicrously complex machine the size of a chair appeared in the dome.
    “I’m glad to see some of you know what this is,” the Doctor said. “This is a Human Biocrystal. The Humans use these devices to shield living things from radiation. This is one of VERY few Human technological achievements that aren’t Human Achievements alone.”
    “Didn’t they steal those from the Aeron?” one student asked quizzically.
    “No,” the Doctor said, a definite note of smugness entering his synthesized voice. “The Aeron never got it to work. When the Humans heard about it…somehow…they asked the Aeron if they could have the prototypes and if they got them to work, would the Aeron like to have the technology needed to reproduce them? Obviously, the Aerons said no, at first, but a few casual mentions of the dozens of irradiated nebular systems near the Aeron homeworld that were known to be brimming with precious metals…well…let’s just say the Aerons quickly forgot their recalcitrance.”
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)00:18 No.15043403
    >with an unnatural purple zig-zag haircut, and several pieces of metal lodged

    Great, it's the future and we're sending them hipsters.
    >> NobodyInParticular !!PdyTLmgrbwc 05/25/11(Wed)00:21 No.15043425
    The scanners detected a number of physical symptoms in the humans that expressed fear, despair, and cases of misplaced anger The warriors present expected nothing more than a quiet nuisance to die quietly for their efforts. What the warmakers had not expected was for the tiny group to hijack the recon vessel in the docking bay while the air was evacuating, turn it around, and force the autopilot to smash the craft into the blast walls, tearing a fiery hole through it and a number of unsuspecting Qualoth soldiers that were idly by before the stand-down order could be received.

    Nor had the remaining one hundred and fifty troops expected the six soldiers to use the blast to initiate a surprise attack with twenty to one odds against them and horrifyingly outdated armor and weaponry. Rather than use conventional human weaponry, which had time and time again been proven useless against the superior Qualoth armor, the six humans had scavenged the interior of the bay for makeshift arms, using nothing less than a power cutter designed for ship maintenance, a small energy cannon torn off of a fighter, a pair of medical utensils for quarantined patients, and even several knives from a box of emergency rations. The humans intended to engage warmakers that had fought for longer than they had lived with scraps of metal and odds that even the most experienced gambler would balk at.

    The humans, however, must not have had a concept of gambling, took the Qualoth off-guard, and managed to wipe out a number of troops before escaping down a side-corridor and deeper into the ship.

    It was at this time that High Command decided to take the humans seriously, and ordered the ship on full lockdown and military alert.
    >> Someone else. !!Qb2aRW+wCPO 05/25/11(Wed)00:22 No.15043433
    “This was to be the pattern. People were scared of the Humans. So, when the Humans came knocking, the opposite species was quick to bargain” the Doctor said, changing the slide to a picture of over fifty diplomats standing together on a stage. Several of them were in the same white suits that he himself was wearing, as they were the universal uniform of the diplomat: they allowed for unfiltered communication without the distraction of personal appearance. Most of the diplomats were not in the uniforms, either because they didn’t need them, or didn’t seem to want them. Alone at one end of the line was a Human ambassador in a chilling black-armored suit, with swept spikes protruding from the back of the helmet, and a blank black plastic visor. Only the Aeron and Lenn diplomats were standing anywhere near the Human, and they didn’t look particularly happy.
    “After all, Humans did have all those shiny toys,” the Doctor said, a note of levity slipping through his synthesized voice. “And somehow, people are quick to forget their fears when there’s money to be made. After a few years, popular fiction – I refuse to call them documentaries – of First Contact became more and more popular, and more and more outlandish.” The Doctor projected a clip from the infamous cult classic 19: First Contact, showing a Kondar tackling a Human into a reactor core; a clip from End of Days showing a Kondar tossing a Human in a white jumpsuit over a railing; and a clip from Maximum Resistance showing a Human gleefully rounding up weeping Kondar slaves.
    >> Someone else. !!Qb2aRW+wCPO 05/25/11(Wed)00:22 No.15043438
    Well, I wanted to point out that the Human in question is a pirate, but I guess I didn't make it clear.
    >> Someone else. !!Qb2aRW+wCPO 05/25/11(Wed)00:24 No.15043453
    “Obviously, the Humans found these inaccurate portrayals of their species more than a little irritating, though some thought they were just hilarious. Personally, I find them profoundly distracting. How’s a diplomat supposed to get anything done when everybody’s looking at you like you’re about to grow horns?” the Doctor said, which caused several of the more attentive students to whip their heads around, staring wide-eyed.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)00:25 No.15043473
    which means you get all the matter in one spot, and then it slowly leaks into an incomprehensible sea of the darkest grey.
    >> NewGuy !2Cy8xshhoE 05/25/11(Wed)00:27 No.15043493
    I don't understand, do they know he's human?
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)00:29 No.15043521
    It's a fairly short leap of logic to say so, so I think the answer is yes.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)00:30 No.15043524
    >This one's old and stupid, but at least it's not common copypasta.

    They said our war with the Humans would be an easy one. For a time, they were right.
    Their initial push was world-shattering. Millions of beings, armed with energy weapons ocmparable to ours, driving in a straight push into the heart of our empire. They called it a Lightning War.

    But we fought back. The great cloning vats on Home produced hundreds of millions of soldiers, and our biotechnology soared to new heights of power. Though the Human advance pushed on, we were slowly wearing them away. The casualties came to number in the trillions on both sides, but still they pushed forwards. Until they reached Home. The fleets of the System Defence Force, in a stunning display of tactics, beheaded the Human fleet, sending them back from whence they came. A small remnant of the Human force was grounded on a distant asteroid in the Belt, unable to fight back.

    Our victory firm, we were determined to humiliate Humanity for what they had done. We did not kill the Humans on the asteroid; we merely blockaded them, showing the whole galaxy the futility of standing against us. They were contained, imprisoned on the surface of the asteroid, guarded by some of the most devastating firepower we could possibly construct.

    For twenty long cycles, nothing happened. Until the day our probes detected a massive explosion on the asteroid's surface. It destroyed the enicrcling defensive forces, and sent a chunk of rock more than eighty folds in diameter hurtling towards home. We desperately to halt it, but we could not stop more than three billion foldweights of mass. In the last moments before the rock hit Home, every ship in the system recieved an automated transmission, somehow shielded against the infernal radiation that veiled the rock. It was two words, uncoded, in Human.

    "FUCK. YOU."
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)00:30 No.15043528
    the smart ones are starting to realize, but it's not been explicitly stated to them.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)00:34 No.15043558
    Eyepatches. Eyepatches good man. The universal mark of a pirate. Future, past. Doesn't matter, you're a badass.

    A stupid haircut and piercings? Nope. You might cut yourself, but that's it.
    >> Someone else. !!Qb2aRW+wCPO 05/25/11(Wed)00:35 No.15043567
    “Anyway,” the Doctor said, seemingly ignorant of the consternation slowly filling the room, “things came to a dramatic head a few years ago when a Human freighter was destroyed by a Lenn warship that was testing ordinance illegally. The Lenn ship – the Filigrath’s Eye, if I recall – immediately retreated to its home space, informing the Lenn leadership of the tragedy. The Humans came in force, demanding that the Lenn pay for what they had done, and, I must say, it was not unfair of them to do so, even from a purely legal standpoint. So, the Lenn nearly dissolved into civil war, between those who said that the government should immediately forfeit something of value to prevent the Humans simply coming in and taking it; those who said that the ‘filthy Humans had it coming,’” the Doctor said, curling his fingers in midair, “and those who said that the Humans wouldn’t listen to reason if the government tried to negotiate for reparations and would just conquer the whole species.”
    “The Humans, however, had other plans. This, students, is why you’re here, instead of undergrads. All of you are graduate students,” he said pointing at the class. The students, some of whom had been whispering frantically to one another, snapped their gaze down to the podium, as the teacher moved to the next slide. A picture of a gargantuan warship, easily twelve miles long, appeared in the center of the dome. Its flanks were marked with alternating white blocks and black lines, and a few students recoiled as they realized that it was supposed to look like a set of teeth from a Human pet species, the canine.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)00:35 No.15043575
    Better: the jolly rodger. Far more identified with piracy, and I could easily see a space pirate swabbing one on his/her battle armor.
    >> NewGuy !2Cy8xshhoE 05/25/11(Wed)00:37 No.15043584
    Why does every HFY thread always have humans in some desperate war but always win through determination. I want a HFY where the humans are in a desperate diplomatic struggle that ends in sexy time.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)00:39 No.15043601
    I think the people have spoken, this thread is now about space pirates.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)00:39 No.15043606
    Because it's so much harder to write an argument. Seriously. Fighting may require a little wordplay, but arguments, negotiations, and all that are made out of it.
    >> NewGuy !2Cy8xshhoE 05/25/11(Wed)00:40 No.15043609
    Canin ship is next on my list right after the power armor.
    >> NobodyInParticular !!PdyTLmgrbwc 05/25/11(Wed)00:40 No.15043610
    To add insult to injury, perusal of the visual feed of the docking bay showed that the humans were not even a full combat group, but actually consisted of three soldiers, a medical officer, a female engineer, and an injured navigational specialist. The Qualoth decided to simply wipe out the motley group as fast as possible, and send their remains to the human government as a reminder of their stupidity. As such, the corridor the humans had ran into led towards a minor mess hall that the Qualoth moved almost a hundred more soldiers into, and kept them on full alert to prevent another random accident and to wipe them out as fast as possible.

    Instead of attempting some form of ploy, as was expected, the humans ran straight into the mess hall, and were met with a hail of gunfire. The only thing that prevented an immediate extermination was a food dispensing counter that they managed to duck into at the last second. Rather than fall for the obvious trap of walking behind the counter, the Qualoth simply continued covering the counter with energy and solid round fire as the remainder of the company followed the humans from the docking bay. The scanners continued to show increasing signs of desperation from the humans, which was taken to mean imminent panic soon followed by a quiet release to death. However, this proved not to be the case, as the humans not only kept fighting, but decided to return fire upon the Qualoth warmakers.

    The Qualoth, shocked by the display in the bay and continuous rebellion at an obvious defeat, were again surprised as the humans, not content with trying to match the show of force, actually attempted to force an attack by leaping over the counters and charging the mass of death-dealing soldiers.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)00:40 No.15043613
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)00:41 No.15043620
    ... can SE keep writing?
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)00:41 No.15043623
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    Have this to hold yourself off.
    >Lack of radial symmetry
    I love that part.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)00:43 No.15043639
    Because when HFY started becoming a meme on the board, it was specifically rebelling against the tropes of Humans as Diplomats and Humans as Jack of All Trades, Master of none.

    It has since been subverted, in some ways less tolerable than others, but generally the theme is that we kick ass and they are afraid of us.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)00:43 No.15043644
    It's also funny how humans are always portrayed as rugged, determined, adaptable, winning against all odds, etc, when in fact we have zero basis for comparison.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)00:45 No.15043657
    >So, the Humans stationed their vessel over the planet, and announced that any party that launched attacks against either the Human vessel itself or other Lenn parties...

    something is missing, is it "would be destroyed" ?
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)00:46 No.15043682

    Yes but only because he isn't posting the typical mary sue shit that happens in these threads.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)00:48 No.15043701
    Except that humanity has flourished on earth, a planet crawling with species that, one-on-one, could kick a human's butt up and down the jungle.

    All humanity has known is victory, and before we got all this newfangled technology, it HAD to have come uphill.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)00:50 No.15043717
    I don't wish to seem rude, or start a flame war, as I agree that mary sue bullshit is bad. I DM for my DND group, and rule #1 is "No Mary Sues."

    But everyone seems very angry about the humanwank in a humanwank thread. HFY threads are about humanity overcoming odds and rising to rule the galaxy/kick ass and take names. I understand that mary sues are out of place normally, but this is a thread about humanity being awesome.

    Just a thought.
    >> Someone else. !!Qb2aRW+wCPO 05/25/11(Wed)00:50 No.15043723
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    “The Humans sent one ship to the Lenn homeworld. They arrived to begin legal dialogue, and they found pure chaos. The planet was literally hours from a self-destructive civil war. All over one ship being destroyed. So, the Humans stationed their vessel over the planet, and announced that any party that launched attacks against either the Human vessel itself or other Lenn parties would be reduced to a fine powder. Naturally, the Lenn were quite willing to do as told.”
    The slide changed again, to a pair of Human diplomats in their terrible armored suits, marching down a boarding ramp flanked by a full platoon of battlesuits. Several Lenn were waiting at the base of the ramp, their backs to the camera. “The Humans sent two diplomats down to the planet below, and they were immediately bombarded with all sorts of wearying stereotypes, from the Lenn government prostrating themselves in terror to Lenn civilians fleeing in terror to Lenn military ruining their dress uniforms in terror. Very simply, terror,” the Doctor said with a completely flat voice. Several students tittered nervously, but said nothing.
    “The Humans were caught off-guard. They didn’t want to be seen as devils. Well, not to that degree, anyway,” the Doctor said, shrugging. “See, the Humans had made a mistake. They had deliberately perpetuated the stereotype of Humanity being an unstoppable, unknowable force of terror, because,” he said, ticking points off on his digits, “1) the Humans were up against their own first impressions, which were terrible; 2) the negotiations with the Union were delightfully one-sided; 3) the Humans were unable to control their own piracy problem for a time and this helped them cover up this embarrassment…can anyone think of the final reason why the Humans perpetuated the stereotype?”
    >> Someone else. !!Qb2aRW+wCPO 05/25/11(Wed)00:51 No.15043730
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    Gee, thanks.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)00:51 No.15043733
    I had written one of these a while back that was posted on here, but I didn't save it. Humans stranded with a colony ship that was out of fuel over a planet that turned out to be inhabited by a late midevil/early renaissance technology level alien race. Set down in the wild and distant places far away from the alien civilization and became sort of like Celtic elves; mysterious forest bogeymen. Ended with a couple of marines saving an alien farm-hand from bandits that had tried to raid a human settlement. Saved him by shooting the bandit holding him hostage with a railgun.

    I doubt anyone has it saved, but you'd be my hero if you did.
    >> NobodyInParticular !!PdyTLmgrbwc 05/25/11(Wed)00:52 No.15043744
    The Qualoth rounds, which were aimed to pick off anybody foolish enough to do exactly what the humans had just done, overshot the humans as they ducked low to the ground and ran at the firing squad. Before the Qualoth could readjust and aim, the six humans had ran up to and, of all things, attempted to engage the warriors in hand-to-hand combat. While the Qualoth soldiers were used to sights of war that would make the most enlightened philosophers ill, none of them had experienced a creature a fraction of their bulk, wearing only the flimsiest power armor, try and gouge out their eyes with eating utensils.

    Sadly, for the second time in an hour, and the second time in the history of their race, the Qualoth were taken by surprise. The initial warmakers had fallen to the human attacks, and it was at this time the second group had entered the mess hall.

    Seeing the ambush, these already angry soldiers decided the best course of action was to shoot the humans before they could humiliate the Qualoth even more. Unfortunately, due to the size difference between the two races, these shots did more harm than good as they inevitably hit another Qualoth. Unbelievably, the humans stuck low to the ground, avoided the blades the Qualoth had drawn, and even managed to escape the mess hall, straight into the training docks, which were filled with hundreds more of Qualoth warmakers. The humans could not be expected to survive this encounter.

    Just as they could not be expected to survive the last two.
    >> NewGuy !2Cy8xshhoE 05/25/11(Wed)00:55 No.15043788
    As the Humans charged the master warmaker the Qualoth asked, "Who are you?", The humans responded "The aristocrats."
    >> Someone else. !!Qb2aRW+wCPO 05/25/11(Wed)00:58 No.15043814
    Dead silence echoed throughout the room. Finally, after very nearly two minutes, one girl gingerly raised a paw. “Um…because…you thought it was funny?”
    “Well, yeah, more or less,” the Doctor said. The graduate students’ faces all paled, or something like it, at the fact that the Doctor hadn’t protested the use of the word ‘you.” The Professor, in the front row, nodded glumly, but didn’t raise an objection. “See, the Humans had a facet of their culture that somehow, managed to become COMPLETELY unique. Remember when I said that Humans’ brains evolved in the raw stuff of Madness? Well, it manifested oddly. Most species killed themselves. Humans decided to kill themselves off, too. In fiction. Pre-Contact Human fiction is chock-full of examples of Humans getting their asses kicked, by Nature-” he cut in a clip of a Human being swept away by a tidal wave – “to their own hubris-” a picture of a Human city on fire as an army of automata swept it clean of life – “to aliens.” He finished with a clip of several hHumans in uniform screaming as they were melted alive by aliens that did, indeed, look very menacing. “Humans didn’t have compulsions to commit autocide, the destruction of their own race, but they imagined it happening, over and over. To finally meet actual aliens,” he said, gesturing to the crowd, several of which looked like they were seriously considering making a break for it, “and to find them TERRIFIED of Humans…well. Let’s just say that it erased several long-standing inferiority complexes.”
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)01:01 No.15043849
    Troll-teacher is troll-tier.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)01:04 No.15043867
    And there we have it gentlemen, another masterwork woven into the Veil.
    >> Someone else. !!Qb2aRW+wCPO 05/25/11(Wed)01:05 No.15043884
    “The Humans were afraid of us?” one student asked, carefully avoiding the word ‘you.’ The Doctor nodded sagely, behind his golden mask.
    “Yes! Well, at first, and not specifically. Humans, you see, have a fear of the unknown. Their evolutionary niche is a very, very tenuous one: top omnivore, after all, has to watch its ass for top predator. Their technology evolved faster than they did, you see, and their quite natural fear of the unknown never really went away, even after they more or less proved that there was nothing to fear outside the Veil.”
    The Doctor turned off the projector, turning the lights back up, and sat down in the ornate chair at the front of the stage, where the Professor sat when he wasn’t doing a holographic presentation. “The Humans decided that there had to be something they could do. After all, the Lenn had done something very, very illegal, and Humans had died for it…but the Lenn were already punishing themselves far out of proportion to their wrongdoing. So, the Human United Terran Alliance government passed a decree, ordering the Diplomatic Corps to stop with the intentionally scary visage and just deal reasonably with the Lenn. The diplomats agreed immediately, of course…they were the ones who would be first to die if the Lenn did something stupid.”
    “The Lenn were confused, of course. Who wouldn’t be? The Humans had held them in the grip that the entire civilized universe feared, and released them. After demanding that the crew of the Lenn ship that had caused the whole mess be sentenced to life in prison, and demanding that the Admiral who had ordered the ship to test its ordinance in the way it did be immediately and permanently blacklisted and dishonorably discharged, the Humans up and left.”
    >> NobodyInParticular !!PdyTLmgrbwc 05/25/11(Wed)01:08 No.15043915
    The Qualoth High Command continued to watch in horror as the humans drew deeper and deeper into the ship, their desperation and fear only serving to fuel them even farther onwards. They had seen colony after colony of humans slaughtered like so much sheep, and had long ago reached the conclusion that because they were the most numerous species in the universe and the large number of factions and split ethnicities that they had little to no regard for the occasional genocide, and that humans in large groups were one of the weakest forces ever seen.

    When the humans had reached the armory that marked the halfway point between the War Bridge and the docking hangar, the High Command began to think that the corollary was just as true. The humans, while meek while free ranging and happy, were perhaps just as violent and brutally aggressive when cornered and outnumbered.

    When the humans reached the medical bay that was three quarters of the way to the Bridge, the High Command began to ponder the future of the war, wondering what would happen when the case of this ship became a microcosm for the war at large. Would these peaceful nomads turn just as savage when the Qualoth fleet finally reached Earth?
    >> NobodyInParticular !!PdyTLmgrbwc 05/25/11(Wed)01:09 No.15043930
    When the humans were at the walls of the War Bridge, the High Command could only sit and watch as the group, which had probably not known each other before breaching the docking bay, worked with a unity and focus that took centuries of hardened combat for Qualoth warmakers to achieve.

    When the humans broke in, the High Command simply stared at them. When the group walked up to them, they could not bring themselves to speak. The humans, who had found access to the most advanced of all Qualoth weaponry, still preferred to use the makeshift scraps they had pieced together, and were about to take control of the ship with them. After leaving a trail of devastation longer than the Qualoth victory record, calmly pointed their tools at the commanders and, before firing and beheading the Qualoth military force, looked upon them and said the sentence that soon became one of the first rules in engaging interspace warfare.

    "Never corner a wounded snake, and never outnumber or outgun a human."
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)01:10 No.15043947
    >humans not going out of their way to terrify aliens
    >showing humans out of their suits
    I'll consider this non-canon.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)01:11 No.15043955
    meh. There's definitely been better, and not much worse.
    >> NobodyInParticular !!PdyTLmgrbwc 05/25/11(Wed)01:12 No.15043966
    That about wraps up my little piece, hope you enjoyed it. Relatively new to writefaggotry in sci-fi, but I'm fond of it, and would appreciate it if someone screencapped it properly.

    Comments and criticisms are always appreciated.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)01:12 No.15043968

    Only until it culminates with insane xeno dickings, or everyone believing that we're trying to troll them, and refuses to accept that we aren't the boogeymen from space that eat your babies while you aren't looking?
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)01:12 No.15043974
    But humans are social animals that cooperate in groups, they wouldn't have fought one-on-one.
    >> Someone else. !!Qb2aRW+wCPO 05/25/11(Wed)01:14 No.15043993
    “That’s why you’re all here, graduate candidates,” the Doctor said, casually casting his invisible gaze over the mass of nervous students. “The UTA is tired of a part of their history that, frankly, everyone involved would rather move on from. Humanity is the dominant force in the galaxy by virtue of their mental capacity, their ability to overcome the Madness, and their massive territory. Not scare tactics. So, as I’m sure at least a few of you Mechanical Engineering and Diplomatic Studies students know, the Humans have decided to start gradually releasing their advanced technology in bits and pieces to members of the Union who agree to start speaking to their citizens, and telling them to stop being afraid of Humans.”
    The Doctor reached onto the small table next to the chair, grabbing a glass of water. He lifted it in front of his mask, and – clearly enjoying himself – took a drink, clean through the solid plastic helmet. The room erupted in confused mutters. The Doctor set the glass down on the table and stood up, putting his hands in his pockets under the clearly holographic suit. He started pacing the stage.
    “So, first and foremost among the inventions the Humans shared with the universe was the device that lets them move through clouds of nebular heavy metal molecules – uranium and so on – that space is littered with. It lets the Humans go clean through the parts of supernovae remnants that the rest of the Union have to avoid. The second bit was these cool holographic projectors.” He tapped the side of the ‘helmet’ as he turned to face the audience, and the white and gold shell vanished…revealing Professor Snar’drik, with a massive grin on his face.
    >> NewGuy !2Cy8xshhoE 05/25/11(Wed)01:16 No.15044004
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    WEll anyways heres my shitty attempt at a pirate ship. I can never seem to get past the whole, "looks like it took ten minutes in ms paint" thing
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)01:17 No.15044014
    Seconded. The whole "lolitrolu" is part of the attraction of the Veil. But this is an interesting story in itself.

    Can you imagine if he was a human guest-teacher and was still perpetuating the terrifying lie? That'd be hilarious. Especially if he covered up his barely-concealed laughter as translator work.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)01:17 No.15044017
    Is that Homestar Runner's skull on the front of the ship? If so, I approve, he is quite irritating.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)01:18 No.15044027
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)01:20 No.15044039
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    >completely disregarding human perpetuation of their terrifying reputation by any means necessary for the sole reason that it heavily benefits us
    >> NobodyInParticular !!PdyTLmgrbwc 05/25/11(Wed)01:21 No.15044047

    Was thinking about how the media always portrays large masses of people as weak and dumb, but practically worships smaller squads. Every movie or game is always about how some individual or motley crew overcomes unbeatable odds, and was trying to reflect that in this kind of situation. Still need to work at it, then.

    Ah, well, better luck next time.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)01:21 No.15044048
    >not actually a human guest

    Well, that's an anti-climax if I've ever seen one.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)01:22 No.15044052
    Well played Someone Else, well played. Get us all expectant of the human speaker, just like the class, then reveal that it was all just trolling. Very true to the spirit of the Veil universe.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)01:22 No.15044058
    Must've elected liberals to office.
    >> Someone else. !!Qb2aRW+wCPO 05/25/11(Wed)01:23 No.15044065
    The room exploded with angry and relieved conversation. The Professor stood at the front of the room, smirking from aural gland to aural gland, as the rows of students yelled themselves hoarse.
    “I had you going, didn’t I?” he asked, flashing his teeth. “I really had you all. Hook, line, and sucker.” Several students nodded ruefully, as the noise died down. “Anyway. I hope you all enjoyed the show. Take it to heart. Whoa, hey, hey, where are you going?” he asked as several students made to leave, several already fumbling with voxes or bags. “Our guest hasn’t made his speech yet.” He pointed at the ‘Professor’ sitting in the first row, who had been watching the entire display with a smirk.
    The original ‘Professor,’ the one who had first introduced the ‘guest speaker,’ stood and walked briskly to the front of the room, as several students poked one another and asked each other what was going on. The fake Professor walked up to the real one and shook his hand, before turning to face the audience. “Well, class, I hope I got my point across. I will say, the pilot class for the next Graduate Studies series seems to have gone rather well so far, don’t you think?”
    “Oh, quite,” the real Professor said mildly. “I’d say it went quite well indeed.” The false professor tapped the side of his head, and his holographic shroud fell away too, revealing…a Human, in an armored black bodysuit, with a blank black mask.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)01:26 No.15044086
    I enjoyed the quality of the writing and the delivery of the story.

    I did not enjoy the content. I feel that the Veil setting is unique in it's portrayal of humans, and I feel that releasing advanced technology in exchange for throwing away a great asset is just foolish.

    But don't let my opinions stop you from writing more. I'll read it.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)01:26 No.15044091
    Now you're just fucking with us, and the narrative is suffering for it.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)01:27 No.15044098

    >>LXXIV, itinla
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)01:29 No.15044115
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    Truly, the professor deserves his tenure, for he understands Human Diplomatic Protocol like a native.
    >> NewGuy !2Cy8xshhoE 05/25/11(Wed)01:31 No.15044131
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    Here it is with an eyepatch. Looks like the big guns a cigar now I like to think.
    >> Someone else. !!Qb2aRW+wCPO 05/25/11(Wed)01:31 No.15044135
    I didn't see anyone in the thread figure it out, did you?
    >> Someone else. !!Qb2aRW+wCPO 05/25/11(Wed)01:35 No.15044169
    Several students screamed, and at least one swooned back into their seat, looking dizzy. The Human pulled the helmet off and put it under their arm, waving his free hand at the group. “Please, class, sit. I won’t take long. I promise,” he said, smiling broadly.
    The students scrambled back into their seats, apprehensively staring at the Human. “My name is Ulor Tilol, and I’m an educational specialist from UTA University on Skedra Prime. Forgive me a bit of theater,” he said, airily gesturing at the holographic devices the two men were carrying, “but I needed to make a point. UTA has come to see that a self-sustaining myth of devilry can only really go so far before imploding. And, frankly, it wasn’t funny when an entire world was at stake. Remember when the Professor said that Humans coped with the Madness by being just a little crazy ourselves? We’re not crazy enough to perpetuate a lie to the point that an entire species falls apart. This Graduate Human Studies class is the first step in getting things back to a more even footing.”
    “Then why did you let it go on for so long?!” one student yelled angrily, before seemingly realizing what he had done. Several other students stared at him with pale faces.
    Doctor Tilol seemed to consider the question, pursing his lips and stroking his chin with his free hand. “Well,” he said after a moment, “some traditions must be maintained.”

    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)01:36 No.15044176
    I stopped reading when I realized you were completely altering the setting to an unrecognizable extent. That could have been why.
    >> Someone else. !!Qb2aRW+wCPO 05/25/11(Wed)01:36 No.15044180
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)01:37 No.15044194
    and the alien professor hologram housed a human? or are we going to see another alien pop out from behind the mask saying "gotcha ya rascals now get out of here"

    While I enjoyed the story the end did seem incredibly out of the blue and unneeded but you are the writer and things like this are your decision.
    >> Someone else. !!Qb2aRW+wCPO 05/25/11(Wed)01:38 No.15044205
    >I sure do hate it when people advance the plot of something with only a few lines of canon backstory; it rustles my jimmies when people try to be creative! It sure does rustle them!
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)01:38 No.15044212

    I enjoy your writing style and your other stories. It was well done, but honestly, it feels like you're to The Veil as Matt Ward is to 40k.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)01:38 No.15044213
    The humans. What an odd species. So similar in appearance; the tallest differ from the smallest by only a few feet, the length of a Teargar forelimb. Their hides vary between just a few colors, and to the uninformed observer, there is little difference between their men and women. They look weak, small, useless.

    They are nothing of the sort.

    When the Ka'Lathar first encountered human forces, they were quite surprised to find an undocumented species flying around well-known space. Granted, the last census had been a few galactic cycles ago, but to see such progress in such a short time astounded the noble Ka'Lathar. Lacking any sort of communication abilities, they warped back to the Regional Headquarters to request a diplomatic squadron be sent to the human homeworld immediately.
    >> NewGuy !2Cy8xshhoE 05/25/11(Wed)01:38 No.15044215
    Changing the setting = bad
    Overall enjoyment = pretty good
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)01:39 No.15044217
    Yes, it does. If it ain't broke, don't fix it.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)01:39 No.15044218

    I enjoyed it thoroughly. Trolling is only fun for so long, and this seems like a reasonable way to resolve things.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)01:39 No.15044222
    Good writing, as per usual, but it does alter the setting quiet a bit. Although it's not entirely canon-breaking as a concept.

    Imagine if a rumor spreads from this that humans can use their technology to be anyone at any time, given the right twist it would very much end up in the spirit of the Veil.
    >> Someone else. !!Qb2aRW+wCPO 05/25/11(Wed)01:39 No.15044226
    Appreciated. "Out of the blue," yeah, I'll take that. Remember that this is told from the aliens' perspective, though, how else could it end except with them getting trolled? The story about the cineplex was told from the perspective of the human, would this story have been any fun at all if the audience knew how it was going to end?
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)01:41 No.15044241
    But if they know what we look like and know we're harmless, it destroys it. It's just a stupid thing to do.
    >> Someone else. !!Qb2aRW+wCPO 05/25/11(Wed)01:42 No.15044261
    Thank you.
    I didn't change the setting at all. I changed how one of the players of the story told in the setting, the Humans, behave, when they saw the negative effects their behavior is having. If you think the way humans now act is unrealistic, 'real' being defined by
    then consider: the Humans stopped trying to do things the diplomatic way because the scary way was easier. Who's to say they'd maintain the facade when shit hit the fan?
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)01:43 No.15044266
    Am I the only one who, when I read stories about the Veil, end up thinking that I feel it, tugging on the back of my mind?

    It passes when I realize it's fiction and I would be immune even if it wasn't, but it sure is a weird feeling.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)01:43 No.15044269
    ...We hold more colonies than anyone else, and we're generations ahead of everyone technologically. The masquerade was a fun way to safely survey our new surrounding, but dropping it does not endanger mankind in any way.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)01:44 No.15044282
    ok I'm sorry but this setting has normal humans that just happened to be thrust into circumstances that created a myth of "horror from beyond the stars" feeling around them. They used this at first to their advantage but I'm certain that seeing an entire species erupt into civil war over the mere possibility of human retaliation would be enough for them to remove the facade.

    Humanity has certain ethical standards and knowledge of this would cause the people of the UTA to demand that they recreate their public image. The idea that you are suggesting, the one that states that humanity would keep up this facade while millions die as a direct result of the fear caused by it, is utterly ridiculous. This isn't the setting being raped, it is the setting evolving. Learn to see the difference between the two.

    This isn't 40k, here the setting actually advances.
    >> Someone else. !!Qb2aRW+wCPO 05/25/11(Wed)01:44 No.15044284
    I hadn't thought of the disguise aspect. I like that.
    What? We're not harmless, Humans are the dominant force the galaxy because we have ships the size of small moons that can conquer entire systems in a heartbeat.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)01:44 No.15044287
    When the diplomatic squad arrived, they were greeted by human ships scrambling into position. The Cryitick emissary began talks by offering a standard message of peace. The humans began talks by firing the largest goddamn particle weapon I've ever seen.
    You see, the humans have a saying; "bigger is better." In the time it took for a diplomatic team to be assembled, a year had already passed for the short-lived humans, giving them time to set aside their differences and focus on developing space weaponry. Once a group of humans unite, they're scarily determined. Once the entire planet united? They were fucking unstoppable.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)01:45 No.15044295

    I wouldn't say we are "harmless". We vastly outnumber and out tech all the comparable non veil races. If humanity so chose, it could pretty much destroy anything that opposed it. I think it actually makes sense that eventually we would get tired of being the "bad guy", given we already had everything we wanted
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)01:46 No.15044312
    But we mean no harm. Would you prefer mostly harmless?
    >> Someone else. !!Qb2aRW+wCPO 05/25/11(Wed)01:47 No.15044319
    ...No, I can't say I have ever felt that.

    Thanks, elegan/tg/entlemen.

    If it's any consolation to the people who didn't like it, remember, this story takes place thirty years after
    so there's plenty of room for me or others to write tales of galactic trollery.
    >> Someone else. !!Qb2aRW+wCPO 05/25/11(Wed)01:49 No.15044342
    Well, we have caused quite a bit of harm according to >>15035856
    which states that we accidentally blew up an inhabited planet. I don't know whether or not people like that, but I don't.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)01:49 No.15044346
    Nice story. I enjoyed it.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)01:49 No.15044349

    Have we gotten that hot, alien booty?


    Can we get it by being space boogeymen?

    Not likely.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)01:50 No.15044352
    It's just, if I wanted to read "humans being friends with everyone and playing a minor practical joke", I'd read the ass load of such stories that exist. I'll consider this non-canon, as I said.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)01:50 No.15044360
         File1306302640.jpg-(10 KB, 251x251, Deal-with-it-Shepard.jpg)
    10 KB
    thought of this image while reading that
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)01:52 No.15044374
    They plowed forward, taking entire colonies by surprise. It wasn't just their weapons they had supersized; no, their ships, too, were hundreds of standard ship measurement units long. Easily bigger than the dreadnaughts of the Ka'Lathar, these human ships took planet after planet, infesting outward like insects.
    The Council claimed their hands were forced by the humans. I say using planetary nukes is overkill. Whatever their reasons, the Council formally declared war on the humans by obliterating their nearest colonies.
    The humans did not take kindly to this show of force.
    >> Someone else. !!Qb2aRW+wCPO 05/25/11(Wed)01:52 No.15044375
    We're not "friends with everyone," people are always going to be scared of people who can live in the Veil. We're just not actively trying to terrify people any more.

    I've written stories that ended with humans being friends with the xenos. That's not this story. Not at all.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)01:52 No.15044378
    ...Completely by accident. The intent wasn't there, so mostly harmless.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)01:53 No.15044398
    >That feel when you can't show your alien waifu your hometown because just being there will drive her batshit insane.
    >> Xenos Generator 05/25/11(Wed)01:55 No.15044402
    Look, you're fine with writing it, I'm fine with you writing it, I didn't like it. I think I'm entitled to do so.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)01:55 No.15044409

    Honestly, none of the sources outside the original could be considered completely reliable.


    For example, is told from the perspective of a diplomat who LOVES the theatrics of it all. We are universe building off the initial story, so there is room for fudging the details. A lot of what happens could be chalked up to humans exaggerating or stories being warped with retelling. Hell, that is perfectly in line with the veil. Lord only knows what the kids this class will say afterwards.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)01:56 No.15044421
    When the first wave of human warp bombs hit, we thought it was a fluke. There was no way they could have developed warp capabilities in such a short time. We learned later they had reverse engineered the technology from scavenged wreckage on a captured colony, but even that shows a remarkable mechanical aptitude. Weaponizing it was another remarkable innovation. An innovation that set Council races hurriedly retreating. And that is where we are today; on the run, from a species nobody had even heard of less than a cycle ago.
    >> Someone else. !!Qb2aRW+wCPO 05/25/11(Wed)01:57 No.15044428
    But they thought it was deliberate, or at least the result of callousness.

    I feel like I'm beating my head against a brick wall here. Some people liked it because it was the product of advancement of a story, some people disliked it for reasons that don't find ground in my mind, and some people disliked it and won't say why in a manner that makes sense.

    I get that people feel that humans are out of character, here, but given how little we have established about the setting, who's to say what is and isn't in character? Because certainly, nobody I know would ever propagate a myth that led to the near-extinction of a species.

    Sorry, I'm sperging here.
    >> Someone else. !!Qb2aRW+wCPO 05/25/11(Wed)02:00 No.15044443
    Of course you're entitled to an opinion, I just want to know what formed it.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)02:01 No.15044451
    I just didn't like the feel of it in the setting. That's all.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)02:01 No.15044453

    I wouldn't worry about it. The fact we are arguing already means that people are interested enough to argue. Like/dislike/indifference, similar to most discussions we have here, is largely irrelevant.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)02:02 No.15044462
    Well I, for one, get what you're saying. At first I didn't like it for the humans acting out of character, but you do make a very good point, though I think those that don't like it merely don't because it precludes more stories of the nature that take place afterwords.
    >> Someone else. !!Qb2aRW+wCPO 05/25/11(Wed)02:03 No.15044471
    Intangible dislike doesn't help me improve. What didn't you like about it, that hasn't been countered by my arguments thus far? Or was inadequately countered by my arguments thus far?
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)02:07 No.15044504

    The story is based in the 'Veil of Madness' setting, where humanity is surprised to find that they are the 'big bad' monster that all other civilised races are terrified of, despite bearing no ill intentions.

    Unfortunately instead of a "this is what happens next", the story is more like "this is how it all ends".

    It's not just a continuation of the setting, it's an end to the setting. Humanity from this point is not longer the 'big bad' and the whole premise is finished.

    The fact that the story involves the EXACT situation required for humanity to make a complete U-turn in their diplomatic efforts leaves me with the impression that this was a deliberate deconstruction of the the Veil of Madness setting.

    Hence the less than appreciative comments.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)02:09 No.15044521
    I disliked it because of the change from boogeymen to repentant boogeymen. You say you've already countered it, but to me, it is such a crucial part of the setting that removing it make it an entirely different setting. Without it, humanity is just another high-tech, high-power empire with a "teach the little ones" attitude towards the other races. And there's plenty of those already.
    >> Someone else. !!Qb2aRW+wCPO 05/25/11(Wed)02:11 No.15044530
    I had to look up "deconstruction." I suppose it is that. There's still over thirty years between the first post in the setting and the thing I wrote, if people want to fill it with trollery. God knows this is just a few electrons on the internet, if people dislike it they can disregard it.

    Wasn't HFY a sort of deconstruction of sci-fe itself though?
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)02:15 No.15044574
    Yeah, it was a deconstruction because people didn't like the normal stuff. And when you deconstruct a deconstruction... well, you reconstruct the original.

    So now we've got a typical sci-fi setting. Which is what this whole thing is trying to avoid.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)02:15 No.15044575
    It was a deconstruction of a common sci-fi trope. It wasn't a NEW idea (see Dinosaurs, the Damned trilogy, etc), but it was an uncommon one.
    >> Someone else. !!Qb2aRW+wCPO 05/25/11(Wed)02:16 No.15044585
    What I'm getting is that people like Veil of Madness as a setting because it allows the cruel side of humans to come out without really any sort of repercussions, and because there's no reason to change that behavior. I guess the point I was going for in this story was that that sort of behavior isn't very realistic, and while it's funny as hell, eventually, even the epitomized humans of HFY have to face consequences for their actions. HFY is about creating fictional humans that defy odds and opposition, right? Finding either domination or friendship in the coldness of space? Well, I can't see any humans realistically perpetuating the Veil-style trolling indefinitely. It feels shallow. If you don't agree, OK.

    Besides, it made me tingly inside to know that I had /tg/ guessing at the end of the story. Isn't that what all draw/writefagging is about, at the end of the day?
    >> Someone else. !!Qb2aRW+wCPO 05/25/11(Wed)02:19 No.15044609
    If I deconstruct the idea that humans can troll or dominate the universe by pointing out in one, well-known (such as it is) example of the genre, I'm not turning the example back into normal sci-fi, really: there's still thirty+ years of trolling in the setting's history.

    I guess I'm just having trouble understanding people's responses. I got great reception when I ended Journal of an Alien Diplomat along similar lines, but that was a setting I created from scratch, and Veil isn't, and that's why people are upset?

    man i'm too tired to think
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)02:25 No.15044651

    >Wasn't HFY a sort of deconstruction of sci-fe itself though?

    It is: that's why we liked it.

    Look at it this way: what if you read a story about how Superman will end up in a ditch from kyptonite-laced ass-AIDS in thirty years time?

    Sure, you could probably fit HUNDREDS of adventures during those thirty years. You could also choose to ignore the story completely and think of a DIFFERENT ending (you'll still have to think about the ending though, and hate yourself for doing so).

    This doesn't stop you from having the urge to smack the smart-ass that thought up the idea of krytonite-laced ass-AIDS.

    That said, I really appreciate the skill behind the writing.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)02:27 No.15044673
    >What I'm getting is that people like Veil of Madness as a setting because it allows the cruel side of humans to come out without really any sort of repercussions, and because there's no reason to change that behavior.
    >I guess the point I was going for in this story was that that sort of behavior isn't very realistic,

    This is exactly why people don't like it. You are poking at the flaws in the setting not to fix it, but to use them to tear down what people actually enjoy about the setting, even it it is not 100% realistic.
    >> Someone else. !!Qb2aRW+wCPO 05/25/11(Wed)02:27 No.15044676

    I guess.

    Well, this was an educational experience even if people didn't like the result. I'll keep the lesson in mind when I writefag in the future. I won't write in the Veil of Madness universe again, that's for sure, i guess my idealized version just isn't compatible with everyone elses'.

    I'm way too tired to keep arguing, which is weird, because I wrote most of Tales of the Emperasque and Journal of an Alien Diplomat when I was half-asleep and people ate hat shit up with a spoon.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)02:30 No.15044693
    Think of it like this:

    I bake you a cake. This cake is fucking amazing. It's got fantastic icing, the cake itself is perfect, and it's got your name and happy birthday on it and everything.

    And inside this cake, is a big chunk of your favorite ice cream.

    Now: Imagine I take that cake, and swap out the ice cream for more cake. It's still good, but you're upset that you lost that special something that made it amazing.

    That's what taking the trolling out of the Veil is like. You're taking away my favorite goddamn ice cream.

    As for the "it was still there for 30+ years", a reveal means it can never again happen. Nobody will buy it. You can never have an ice cream cake again, you can only remember what it tasted like.

    Now, if maybe you had this done with one race that was closely partnered to humanity so that they could have their buddies AND continue to troll everyone else, that would be perfect, and everybody would be happy.
    >> Brother-Captain Fumbles !qe95VseFaE 05/25/11(Wed)02:33 No.15044715

    i loved it, And my remedy to the backlash would be to just push the date a bit farther forward, to like... a 100+ years. i would alow the nay sayers who want more trolling more time to do so. for the others. i have no clue
    >> Someone else. !!Qb2aRW+wCPO 05/25/11(Wed)02:33 No.15044717
         File1306305222.jpg-(105 KB, 735x900, OHMYGOD.jpg)
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    This isn't really a fix-fic, though, since...
    Fuck. it is a fix-fic. FUCk.

    ARGH, i'm FanFiction.net-ing the fucking veil of madness.

    FUCKING hell what a waste of time


    argh i am the lowest common denominator of internet writings
    damn it
    >> Brother-Captain Fumbles !qe95VseFaE 05/25/11(Wed)02:35 No.15044730
    this has to be the best simile ever made.
    >> Someone else. !!Qb2aRW+wCPO 05/25/11(Wed)02:38 No.15044756
    God damn it.

    I'm sorry, /tg/, I should not have written this. This was a bad idea even if people liked it. The Veil deserves better.

    This was no better than Stephanie Meyer deciding that vampires were too scary, and making them into glittering homolusters, and you guys pointing that out is like the brave souls who said that Dracula and Soul Reaver stories were better even when they were more unrealistic and fuck

    damn it
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)02:38 No.15044758
    It's a metaphor, similes use "like" or "as".

    But your point still stands
    >> Brother-Captain Fumbles !qe95VseFaE 05/25/11(Wed)02:39 No.15044762
    uh... a few revisions could aliviate that affliction some, and implimenting
    >>15044693 's idea would also help.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)02:39 No.15044764
    I'm glad you enjoyed it. As for me, I'm going to Dairy Queen.
    >> Someone else. !!Qb2aRW+wCPO 05/25/11(Wed)02:40 No.15044780
    No, revisions are useless when the core of the story is about fixing my foibles with the setting rather than making a point.

    I wish I had never written it.
    >> Brother-Captain Fumbles !qe95VseFaE 05/25/11(Wed)02:41 No.15044787
    why is it that i always post right after my point becomes irrelevant?
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)02:42 No.15044792
    So fix it.

    That diplomat wasn't sanctioned. This whole thing was never ordered. It's some flower-child bullshit, and there's only one way to resolve it in a satisfactory manner. By living up to our stereotype.

    The Supremacy is going to go in there and drop an orbital bombardment on that classroom, and then three kill-teams are going to rip that fucker's mouth out through his ass, and we're going to leave a big sign saying "Humans did this because this fucking thief was trying to sell our shit to your people. Don't fucking try to buy our shit from pirates or we'll drop a rock on you too."

    And then everything is better again.
    >> Someone else. !!Qb2aRW+wCPO 05/25/11(Wed)02:43 No.15044804
    Timothy Zahn wrote the Hand of Thrawn Duology as a fix-fic for the entire Star Wars expanded universe, and it was well-received, because the universe needed fixing.
    I tried to fix a setting that didn't need fixing. I didn't mean to, but I did.
    Damn it.
    At least Tales of the Emperasque fixes 40k by making it as fucking stupid as it's supposed to be.
    Maybe i'll write some of that tomorrow.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)02:43 No.15044805
    S'alright. We all make mistakes. Learn from the experience.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)02:46 No.15044828
    Alright man, don't whip yourself too hard. After a point it becomes as annoying as writing fix fics.

    Let's just forget this ever happened, and you can continue being awesome with Emperasque tomorrow.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)02:47 No.15044832
    My only issues with Emperasque is a little (okay, a LOT) of repetition in terms, LCB style, and the Emperor acting completely out of character (like being pissed at things he personally set up and things that he's done himself and worse in the past). I enjoyed the rest.
    >> Brother-Captain Fumbles !qe95VseFaE 05/25/11(Wed)02:47 No.15044833
    damn it, other peoples posts can still make sense..


    I would enjoy that greatly. but please don't get too upset about this 'fix-fix'

    Would it be wrong to ask for a screen cap for this annon? because though it is not cannon i still enjoyed it immensely.
    >> Someone else. !!Qb2aRW+wCPO 05/25/11(Wed)02:47 No.15044837
         File1306306070.png-(444 KB, 421x359, chest.png)
    444 KB
    That's like shaving your chest with a lawnmower. And if anything, it's even farther out of line with human behavior.
    No, I'm just pulling the plug, I'm Squatting "The Veil of Madness, Torn."
    Night night, /tg/, this was a learning experience.
    >> Brother-Captain Fumbles !qe95VseFaE 05/25/11(Wed)02:49 No.15044847
    >> Someone else. !!Qb2aRW+wCPO 05/25/11(Wed)02:51 No.15044866
         File1306306304.jpg-(140 KB, 1280x1024, 1189971112687.jpg)
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    Well, yeah, it is repetitive. That's true. Keep in mind, I dump it unedited.
    That's a discussion for another thread. Night all. Here is a tree.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)02:55 No.15044887
    That tree is lit up, while the rest of the forest is dark.

    I don't understand why they did this. The dark forest was fine just the way it was, and this lighted tree changes the atmosphere of the forest. It doesn't matter that there's an indefinite amount of time that it was still darkened like the rest of the trees, because now it's lit up and the difference ruins the mood.

    (I'm sorry, but I had to do it.)
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)03:13 No.15044993
    its fine as is, just have the next person right it off as fox news

    >> Thermobaric Lemon 05/25/11(Wed)03:19 No.15045022

    hey someone, just thought i should leave you this, in case you see it.

    Your writing is great, the steady reveal then last minute switch is clever, and your additions to the setting are fantastic. Don't beat yourself up about this, it fits with the setting even if it signifies the end of it. If I could make a suggestion,

    The bulk of it is fine, humans scaring people and all that, its okay that people know what human faces look like, and you're completely right, humanity would eventually need to lower the facade and start dealing with other races sensibly. THe real concern I (and potentially others) had is that its a complete U turn for humanity, if mankind is really going to change its image it will do it slowely and caustiously. Obviously the populace isn't going to allow a race to genocide itself over our trolling, but we need not throw out the troll with the bathwater so to speak. Humanity doesn't need to give up on trolling to be more reasonable, they just need to work less terrifying aspects into their image.

    A colony is suffering from a natural disaster or some such, theres not really anyone coming to help, then fuckhuge human ships show up covered in skulls and teeth and playing steven segal movies at full blast. They drop giant black landing craft and terrifying humans in suits emerge armed to the teeth and speaking in a grating voices. They then hand out food, give medical care, and give toys to the children, never once breaking the facade of being monsters who just happen to be helping people. Once they're gone the people remember that the monsters helped them, but they are still just that, monsters.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)03:23 No.15045051
    I like Someone Else's addition to the veil. It gives an end point to it. The time that this takes place after first contact could be changed to 100 or 1000 years if necessary. There's still plenty of room to work with the bogeyman angle, but if a mythos is to be put together well, a defined end point must already exist so that it does not decline horribly.
    The story was well written and brought forth relatively believable reasons for the humans to one day break the facade. One day being the key phrase of course.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)03:28 No.15045082
    agreed, this can still be cannon, maybe more so if the date is left out, let humanity run its troll for as long as is needed rather than putting time limits on it. We just need to say that this is how the trolling ends....or wait just one DAMN MINUTE


    This is not the end.

    Oh no, this is the beginning. Everything up to here was a joke, but humanity has seen the error of its ways. The aliens will now accept humanity as powerful but benevolent jokers, but wait, what does this thread say at the top?
    Humanity do not joke with people, we win. all thats happened is we've got tired of this joke, time for a new one. Peacful humans? HA
    Now the real trolling begins
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)03:38 No.15045143
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)03:41 No.15045159
    I like your point.
    >Humans think that this whole galactic bogeyman thing is getting boring.
    >Break the facade and begin to earn trust of the rest of the galaxy.
    >Hit them with a brand new Troll.
    >Repeat as necessary.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)03:46 No.15045183

    and this gentlemen is why we must elect a /b/tard president.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)03:50 No.15045206
    I like the cut of your jib, sir.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)04:07 No.15045312

    excellent, we just need a new visage to put on, give them troll products that kinda work, but have horrible problems that only the designers would realize.
    Spread learning throughout the universe, teach only troll physics.
    Keep uplifting really annoying races that everyone else wants to ignore (kindered)
    Be the loud assholes at space UN, demand the floor and rant off topic for hours (already kinda done)
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)04:08 No.15045315
    I personally quite enjoyed the story and was eating it up. Unfortunatly the switch between teacher and human was poorly done and the writing was of a much lower quality then the rest of the story and left me with a distaste for the story. Keeping with it being a human speaking and not a hologram switch I think would make the story better.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)04:18 No.15045358
         File1306311488.png-(14 KB, 191x218, 1281679051540.png)
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    Veil of Madness humanity's patron god is apparently Loki.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)04:23 No.15045386
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    Maybe make each new, galaxy-wide joke a new era in the galaxy's society.
    >First era, pre humanity
    >Second era, period of the boogymen humans
    >Third era, the time in which we were all sure that water had a 3rd, invisible molocule and that humans could exist in the veil because of it.
    >fourth era, in which we were tought about a new fuel source from the veil of which was purported (by humanity) to last forever. In fact, it lasts for five centuries before the nanites hidden in the fuel core re-direct the radios to play mariachi-band-christmas-charols non-stop
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)04:26 No.15045394
    Sorry, science fail there, water with 4 atoms, not 3, which it already has. Sorry.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)04:26 No.15045395
    Humanity's new motto

    Live free and Troll hard!
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)04:28 No.15045402
    plot twist, the veil is not actually a natural phenomenon, its cause BY humans and is expanding as they do.

    Alternativly, humanity actually knows all about it cause they built it on the grounds that its way easier to troll the mentally unstable, i mean imagine a /b/tard in a psych ward.... its scary.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)04:34 No.15045418

    >invisible third molecule
    >teach new troll math
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)05:03 No.15045528
    Im with these posters. the facade would have to come down at some point to some degree.
    besides, pirates will always be there for the devilry aspect. or there could be a rift and splitting of human gov, 1 faction being more xeno-friendly than the other.
    great setting, reread the paste everytime lol
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)05:07 No.15045545
    >> 008 05/25/11(Wed)05:14 No.15045578
    *Have it slip that humans can't see the color red. Watch as all the new alien spy ships are painted blazing red, red cloaked spies trying to sneak around invisible and other subterfuge, made all the more visible by being the only things red.

    *Pretend to have a massive civil war complete with large holographic battles just visible from the edge of the veil. Present two governments to the galactic UN, each demanding the exact opposite of the other but threatening retribution if the aliens take one side over the other.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)05:34 No.15045654

    What makes you think thats ever even going to happen?
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)05:38 No.15045667
    Ugh, HFY.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)05:44 No.15045690

    Humans: Intergalactic trolls.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)06:22 No.15045816
    Face it gentlemen: We are the /b/ of the galaxy
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)07:13 No.15046072

    *Claim that the reason that humans can survive in the Veil is because of Eldritch star gods, which they KILLED and ATE. The Veil was caused by the star gods themsevles. Hint that there may be some asleep within the veil. A couple of years later, using holographic dickery, have Cthulhu come into existance on the edge of the Veil.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)07:52 No.15046266
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    Humanity: trolling the galaxy with powered armor and stupid grins.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)08:20 No.15046411
    anyone got any more HFY stories to post?
    >> Someone else. !!Qb2aRW+wCPO 05/25/11(Wed)09:50 No.15046833
    Yeah, I guess that's the problem I have with it: that's just really hard to write.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)09:53 No.15046852
    Humanity Fuck Yeah is irredeemably stupid, but this made me laugh anyway.
    >> Someone else. !!Qb2aRW+wCPO 05/25/11(Wed)10:02 No.15046908
    >Humanity Fuck Yeah is irredeemably stupid
    Every time I see that, I get a little angry.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)10:59 No.15047271
    My somewhat poor attempt.

    The chambers of learning were abuzz that day. Only those greatest in position amongst the science caste were there, not even a single of the overseer class, nor a warrior to keep the usually easily frightened science class controlled. Manes bristled as those there sought to contain their excitement, but failed. In any other place or time, such base display of emotion would shame the members of the science class, their entire family taking the short penance at once. But this day, none sought overseers, nor informed on one another. It was the most special day. They would this day converse with a human.

    Since the day that the humans had emerged from the Veil, those of the science caste given the unenviable duty of studying the Veil had gone from barely being above the labour caste to being considered for rebirth in the warrior, or even overseer caste! All they would need do is find the secret of the human ability to withstand the Veil, and their newest births would be blessed. But no revelations had come, much as they studied and prayed and experimented. Many lost themselves to the Veil's madness, for nothing. But mere twopassages ago, the warrior caste had found a smaller, weaker human ship wandering at the borders of the Veil. The battle had been long, and many of the warrior caste would not know their rebirths, but the greatest of all the prizes that those in the science caste had ever dreamed of was captured. A living human. One who could be studied, discussed with, and if the science caste had their way, dissected for their purposes.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)11:01 No.15047294
    >>15047271 continued
    As finally the door opened, all eyes turned to it, the slight ruffling of manes now carefully controlled the only sound any heard. And then entered the human. A size and a half of even the mightiest warrior caste, but somehow... disappointing. This was the creature that had emerged from the Veil? What secrets could such a strange creature hold? Though large and wide, it had no fangs to defend its rebirths as they formed, only two manipulators, and its mane did not even cover its entire self! Devices carefully designed for such purpose quickly scanned and measured the body, but manes settled. This thing was obviously no threat to a room full of even the science caste, much less with the warrior escorting it now in the room. It was led to the central dias, and swiftly the science caste surrounded it, settling back against their holdlegs to peer curiously. And then the human bared its teeth, and manes fluttered in fear.

    IJKek stepped forth, one manipulator nervously settling the last errant parts of her mane. She had won the right to address the creature in a simply trial, by formulating the position they would take with this particular human, and accepting the outcome on her and her own solely. Should she succeed in finding answers to these creature's immunity to the Veil, her rebirths would be overseers at the least. If she failed, her last rebirths would likely not leave the vats. A fore-manipulator lifted the translation device so painstakingly researched and filled with words, and she spoke. "Humanman, we give you hellos. Hello. Excuse, this translator is experimental. We seek understandings of your Veil-madness, the lack."
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)11:02 No.15047300
    >>15047294 continued again

    Part of IJKek's mane ruffled slightly as the human turned its eyes (and only two!) to her, and it displayed its teeth again before speaking. "Made by the lowest bidder, huh? I'm Overcaptain Howard L. Craft, since we're being polite and all." Hearing a human speak through the translators was.. an event. Perhaps the young science caste who had constructed it had performed better than expected. Not only were the human's words understandable, but it almost seemed to catch the emotion it had in them. Amused, perhaps? So unlike the broadcasts they had heard from human ships! The room itself seemed to relax, as the human's feelings suffused the room. They were like us! Not simply some monsters in human form!

    "Apologies," IJKek replied, playing with her device until it seemed the feed stabilized, already adapting to the conversation. Truly magnificant engineering after all. "I am IJKek, of the science class. Your people have an immunity to the madness of the Veil, and we would benefit greatly from an understanding of such matters. If such an understanding was found, you could return home to your caste with the honors of our people, and our overseer's apologies for the manner which brought you here."
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)11:03 No.15047307
    >>15047300 still going

    The human, Howard, leaned back against the dias. In the only onehalfpassages since the science caste were told this meeting would occur, there was no time to adapt the room to the human's needs, so its comfort was not accounted for. Unknown to the human, as the conversation had begun, infusions had been put into the air to aid openness, and trust. The science caste members in the room had, of course, been inoculated against these, but they seemed to be functioning on the human well. And indeed, with eyes just faintly starting to list. "It's an old story... I mean before we even left our home planet. You know, you don't really think about things till they hit you right in the face y'know? We always thought it was just old stories."

    Tiny rustles of anticipation were seen in the manes of the scientists across the room. The human was obviously under the effects of the infusions as it spoke. "Long, long, long time ago, like I said, before we left our homes, we knew there was something else out there. Not, y'know, you folk." And here an arm waved at the crowd who despite themselves, inched back. A brief reminder that this thing was significantly more powerful than them.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)11:04 No.15047312
    >>15047307 so many words

    "So they were watching us all along, y'know, these... whatchya call them. Gods? Maybe. That's what we thought of them as. Anyways, they stayed out of reach, just watching us, letting the madness overtake us and laughing about it. Till one day, they came down to see what the madness was doing to us close up, and some lucky human caught them off guard, and found they weren't gods after all. And them that lucky human ate his god."

    Manes bristled at that, and a few of the science caste even flared fully. None would report that, of course, in light of this. There were beings who maintained the Veil? And humans had killed one? And.. still under the madness... devoured it? What manner of abomination was this? The human, still in the grips of the infusions, apparently unknowing of the effect its words had, continued. "And then something strange happened. He wasn't mad any more. So he waited till another one was there, and did it again, but shared it with others. And then again, and again. And when they had kids, whatever was in them baked into their skin, and no humans were mad any more. The old things drew back from humanity, thought to leave us on our planet while they kept their madness going. But we changed, and every time we unlocked more of the world, we found them. Again and again and again." The burst of amusement from the human was anything but reasuring this time.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)11:05 No.15047320
    >>15047312 finally

    "Now there's none left. That we can find. But we will find them... hope I get to be the one to do it. I've always wanted to know how they taste.."

    --Recordings of counter-intelligence operative "Howard L. Craft", on mission to the IJ-Ani. Scenario Eldritch used.
    >> Someone else. !!Qb2aRW+wCPO 05/25/11(Wed)11:08 No.15047335
    Not bad. I was going to protest that the human was captured when they're in open (if trolling) negotiations with the rest of the galaxy, but I like how you did it.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)11:10 No.15047343
    Huimanity Fuck Yeah is fine to me. So long as we can have Fuck Yeahs for everything else as well (which we never do).

    'Spess Mehreenz Fuck Yeah' however, is definitely gayer than 13 dudes blowing 17 dudes.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)11:17 No.15047398
    Mine was set assuming nothing but the first Veil story, not necesarily including your story. It works either way, I imagine.
    >> Someone else. !!Qb2aRW+wCPO 05/25/11(Wed)11:20 No.15047423
    Right, that's what I mean, the first story says that they're still in negotiations.

    Never mind, I liked the story.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)12:25 No.15047864
    Therians are the true 4chan in SPAAAAAAAAAAAAAACE.

    >5 trillion implying about implied implications of implicated matter in the last 2 seconds
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)14:44 No.15048886
    Well, for anything it matters, SG, I really liked your little foray into the veil. I'd say, if nothing else, the ending probably could of been shaped up just a tiny bit more.

    But it fits the spirit very well, just as long as it included a bit more trolldickery from the humans, Pull the mask, shake the aliens hands with a electric-buzzer. That sort of thing.

    Captcha is scary:
    Satisfied [b]Candm
    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)15:02 No.15049054
    Just going to throw it out there, but do you guys think the veil fo madness setting could be combined with other HFY stories? I mean its not terribly well fleshed out (as someone else was brave enough to prove) but could we add more to it?

    I'm think specifically of the Valiance setting (a true battleship AI running around with a monstrous battleship ruining xeno's day.)

    >> Anonymous 05/25/11(Wed)15:53 No.15049576

    eh, Valiance would fit in that humans use huge terrifying ships, but it relies on sheer firepower rather than intimidation, maybe if someone added a psychological warfare suite to it....
    >> Thermobaric Lemon 05/25/11(Wed)16:08 No.15049715
    well the supremecy could very well have been a Guardian class dreadnaught, although it dropping its sheilds upon first contact is a little uncharacteristic.

    It would add a nice helping of conflict to the veilverse though, maybe give humanity something to back up their fearsome reputation.

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