!trap the bomb to me and walk up to him when he arrives and blow us both up.

Its the only way to be sure!

>>14353837
ALLAH AKBAR!

Why do I have to use the things I have? Why can't I just go buy another watch?

>>14353857
>>14353837

Sadly the reason your watch is broken is because, when you were just about to go out for a tasty lamb burger at McAllah's, you tripped over your spare bomb, detonating it and blowing off both your legs. You'll never make it out of the building in time now and you have no line of sight to his arrival.

tl;dr funny, but no :) you have to figure out how to time 1.5 hours using those two things

>But not evenly

Light the first fuse at both ends, and light the second at one end. After the first fuse has completely burned away, 1 hour will have passed and the first fuse is un-evenly 1 hour in. Light the other end of the second fuse and in another half hour it will have also burned completely.

I'm almost absurdly proud of myself.

>>14353885
Ka-boom, you rejoice and hail your god Jabbah as you hear the wails of the women crying out for their slain leader President Brrzrrgt!

Congratulations!

>The fuses each last two hours. They do not burn evenly.
What a bunch of shitty fuses. No, seriously, I didn't pay for shit like that.
I beat my supplier to death with a pigeon, steal his pocket watch, light a cigar and proceed to stare the President to death.

Light one fuse from one side and the other from both sides.

When the one lit from both sides is finished, light the other fuse from the other side.

The first fuse will expire in 1 hour. The second should be 1 hour burned through, and when lit from the other side, will take 30 more minutes to finish.

Heard this one on the Day9 Daily.

>>14353897
Huzzah!

(I mis-typed "first" for "second" in there, but my meaning obviously came across)

Question: If the fuses burn unevenly, how do you know that they last for two hours before actually lighting up every individual fuse and measuring how long it lasts? Isn't the point if fuses to burn evenly, so that you'd know precisely how much time you have before the bomb goes off?

The king of Flarandia is dying. He has twin sons and loves both dearly, but cannot decide to whom to leave the kingdom. He decides he must determine who is the wiser.

He decides to hold a horse race to determine which son is the wiser. The son whose horse is the LAST to reach the finish line will win the kingdom. Immediately, while the other stands confused, one son vaults up on a horse and races away to the finish line. The king knows he is the wiser one and awards him the kingdom. Why?

(There is a tiny bit of word-play going on here, just fair warning)

1) Light a match and place it on the ground
2) Count how long it takes to burn completely (let's say 54 seconds)
3) Repeat 100 times (54 x 100 = 5400 seconds = 90 minutes = 1.5 hours)
4) Detonate Bomb
5) Get a refund on shitty fuses

rolled 4 = 4

>>14354015
It isn't his horse

>>14354009
I suppose you could make up any answer here. Maybe they have 2 hours of burnable material, which burns evenly in itself, but is not distributed evenly across the non-flammable string it's adhered to. The idea is to keep the person from just saying "I fold the fuse in half/half, presto a one hour / half-hour fuse".

>>14354015
The son that rode away uses his remotely detonated bomb to kill his brother and dad.

>>14354015
Presumably, he's using the horse belonging to the other prince.

>>14354038
Not OP, but
>2) Count how long it takes to burn completely (let's say 54 seconds)
I hope you're damn accurate because any error will be multiplied by the number of matches.
>3) Repeat 100 times (54 x 100 = 5400 seconds = 90 minutes = 1.5 hours)
Delay for math, delay for lighting each match, assumption that each match burns in almost exactly the same time, error when wind and the way you hold the match changes somewhat each time.

You're likely to be a couple of minutes off. Might as well count the seconds in your head.

>>14354063
But that's how real fuses work. You fold them in half, and they last half as long.

>>14354039
Yep! Sadly the kingdom isn't doing too well after the housing bubble burst, so it's a mixed blessing for you.

Damn, have to run out unexpectedly. I'll post some more later if the thread is still around.

>>14354100
Lay the other 99 matches down in a row so that one will light another.
And also count in your head.

[ This one is very old, so most people will probably get it. It is sadly heavy word-play ]

There is a man trapped in a room. This room is not possessed of windows nor doors. The room is empty of all things save a table and a mirror. Once the room is eventually torn down, it is found that the man had escaped. No one can work out how it was done, can you?

Start counting.

1 Mississippi, 2 Mississippi....... 5399 Mississippi 5400 Mississippi.

BOOM

>>14354181
Presumably he went through one of the doorless doorways or windowless windowholes.

>>14354181

>the room is empty of all things
>man is a thing
>room has no man in it

>>14354181
He climbed onto the table and clambered out over a wall.

>>14354181
He broke the table or mirror, then made it whole. Used the hole to get out. That one was posted not that long ago here.

>>14354181

He looked into the mirror to see what he saw. He took the saw and cut the table in half. He took the two halves and put them together to make a whole. He placed the (w)hole on the wall and escaped.

>>14354181
He's dead, Jim

You are a venturing life loving Bard travelling down a road. Ahead you see a fork in the road and a comely young woman with a bust that could make mountains weep standing in the middle.

You know of this road, this fork, and the two possible destinations. One road will leads to a shanty town of thieves and cut throats. They absolutely hate music and skin Bard's toe to scrot for even coming down that road. You know on good word that every single one of the murderous wretches is completely incapable of telling the truth and will lie at every opportunity.

The next town over is a magical paradise. A town completely overun with horny husband less nubile young women whom adore music and long for the touch of a man's skin. A good will curse was placed over the village, they were blessed with riches and resources but they were incapable of lying. Every breath they took was truthful and they do not even understand the concept of dishonesty.

Now brave young adventurer here if your problem. The woman in the fork of the road could be from either town. While very very attractive and basically eeking out sexual energy, the clothes and manner that she carries herself indicates a possible rough history. But surely such a fine creature couldn't live in a brigade of bandits and mercs and come out alive?

What is the single thing you can ask of her to ensure you reach your destination of Truthtelling concubines?

>>14354287
Only versions of this gambit I know involve two individuals, so damned if I know.

>>14354287
I would ask if she was a virgin. Then follow up with "NOW YOU'RE NOT!"

>>14354181
guy looks into the mirror and sees what he saw.
He takes the saw and cuts the table in half
Two halves makes a hole
He puts the hole onto the wall and climbs out.

4th grade riddles REPRESENT

>>14354287
In what direction would someone from the other town point me?
Then choose the other way.

There are two men on a boat, in the middle of the sea. They have three cigarettes, but no matches. How are they going to smoke?

>>14354311
But Joey! There is a fualt in this riddle. Since we don't know if either of these two brothers are telling the truth or lying there is no way of know if the riddle was truthfully told out!

>>14354319
That's not a riddle, that's an LSD trip.

>>14354287
Would you lie?

If she answers coherently, she's the liar.

>>14354287

"Which fork do I take to get to your town?"

They will either lie about it and give the correct answer, or give the correct answer.

>>14354338

They throw one cigarette overboard thus making the boat a cigarette lighter.

>>14354287
Well if the thieves cannot tell the truth and the magic sexy women cannot lie then you just whip out your penis and ask the lady at the fork in the rode if you are a man, right?

>>14354362
WINRAR

>>14354381
>>14354362
if its the liar she'll point to the way you came and you're boned.

>>14354287
Wanna fuck?

But seriously:
If you were from the shanty town, which way would you say the other town is?

>Your only assets (aside from the bomb and remote detonator)
>remote detonator

I place the bomb in the appropriate spot and use the remote detonator to detonate it remotely at the appropriate time.

>>14354381

IF I COULD DESTROY ONE CONCEPT ON THE FACE OF THIS EARTH, IRREVOCABLY AND WITHOUT ANY CHANCE OF IT BEING RECREATED, IT WOULD BE GANGURO.

>>14354409
You don't have line of sight. You have to keep track of time using the fuses.

>>14354419
there is nothing in the OP that says I can't see the guy arrive.

>>14354418
And i would applaud you for it.

>>14354418
.....
>12.4 GB
>Ganguro folder

why the hate brah?

>>14354404
You say: "If that way is your town, then which way is the shantytown?"

>>14354418
IF I COULD SAVE ONE CONCEPT WITH MY LIFE FOREVER IN THIS UNIVERSE, IT WOULD BE GANGURO PORN

DON'T FUCK WITH MY BROWN SLUT FETISH, MAN

>>14354366
This, because if she is a liar, then she will point to the town of truth and if she only tells the truth then she will point towards the town of truth.

>>14354447
Why not actual brown girls though? Why fake tans and glossed-up lips?

>Also see pic.

>>14354362
Why do we only get one question? I mean she just standing there.

Is the sky Blue?
OK in addition to that which way to the sexy village?

This kind of thing only works with a magical bridge guardian or something that kills you if you don't ask one and only one question.

In which case you simply ask about the air speed velocity of an unladen swallow.

can someone please explain to me what the guy who got his arm chopped off is talking about?

>>14354624
Ignore the green text.

There are three words in "The English Language".
>That in end in "gry"
>"Angry" and "Hungry" are two.
Whats the third?

"Language" is the third word.

Very poor communication attempting to be clever. Arguably there are better word 'puzzles' to use than this one but the point remains the same.

I don't get OP comic. Is this some form of violence/revenge fantasy that impotent nerds draw when someone that confuses their autistic thought patterns.

>REMOTE FUCKING DETONATOR
>ENTIRE THREAD IS RETARDED

Why don't you just wait nearby and watch? It's REMOTE.
No, the real mystery here is why I have matches and second-rate fuses.

>>14354688
its xkcd. you should know this by now.

and arguably the guy who got his hand cut off is the one with the autistic thought pattern.

What device for measuring time has the least moving parts?

Hardmode: Which has the most?

>>14354734
I'm familiar with it. I also know he uses hat guy to enact his juvenile retribution fantasies. It's really sad.

>>14354769

FIRST ONE SHOULD PROBABLY BE A SUNDIAL, WITH 2 MOVING "PARTS" (THE EARTH AND THE SUN)?

>>14354769
Egyptian water clock. Jug filled with water and hole.

>>14354769
#1 the sun or a sundial
#2 reality

>>14354772
To be fair, I've known far too many nerds and faux-intellectuals who do what hat guy says in the comic (Intentionally make a bad communication and then act like a pompous ass when you misunderstand them, as if they know something you can't understand). Not in relation to riddles, though.

>>14354786
thats only one moving part. the earth.

>>14354734
#2 is an hourglass

>>14354811
So you maim someone over a gradeschool-level joke.
And Munroe trying to lecture someone on humor is thoroughly ironic.

>>14354772
just so you know you're calling something juvenile on /tg/, the preferred board of man-children with obsessive hobbies and games.

the hat guy isn't author violent wish fulfillment. OP comic is easily the most violent comic he has, and its extremely atypical. Hat guy mostly does cyber crimes or is there to provide a less socially acceptable view point.

>>14354769
The most is unanswerable, since as soon as we figure it out, some asshole will just make a clock with MORE parts.

>>14354858
jesus christ man, go outside.

Its a fucking internet comic, no one is advocating chopping off limbs for bad word puzzles.

Only a monumental retard would think he seriously considers this acceptable behavior.

To be honest your pissy smugness is the exact thing the comic is criticizing. Honestly explain what you mean by ironic. Its not a lecture its a COMIC, that some people find COMICAL, no irony involved.

>>14354907
He fucking chainsawed someone's car in half for taking up an extra space in a parking lot.

Maybe I'm just unsympathetic because doing that around here could get you legally shot and killed by the car's owner.

>>14354907
Munroe is basically one exposed penis away from being on the same level of shit B^U inhabits.

>>14354947
when i first heard the puzzle it was framed like this. A man is taking a tour through a museum and comes across an exhibit on time pieces. A curator asks him which time piece has the least moving parts, he smiles and responds "a sundial". "Good" says the curator "but do you know which one here has the most moving parts?" After looking around the room for a bit the man admits to being stumped, what time piece was the curator talking about?

Hourglass is the answer, It makes more sense in a narrow context like that.

>>14354971
I wasn't suggesting that it *was* socially acceptable.
Just that it was a tremendously unfunny way to set up a joke.

>>14354997
Monroe's art is better.

>>14355071
And no one is going to argue otherwise.

>>14354997
what the hell are you even talking about?

>>14354988
see
>>14354971

if this is all it takes to offend you then you must go into epileptic fits when confronted with a south park episode.

you guys do get that its a comic, a not serious, haha sort of thing. no one is really cutting cars in half. you can distinguish reality from fantasy right? maybe we should establish that baseline first.

>complaining about playing out childish fantasies
>on /tg/
look bro, everyone needs a way to release their frustrations, and exaggerating real life situations in a humorous manner is a perfectly fine way to do that. Claiming that because he makes makes a joke about cutting someone's car in half because they were taking up 2 spots means he secretly pines about doing it and is 1 bad day away from terrorising a parking lot is retarded. You might as well claim that just because someone likes playing 40k once every week they secretly want to join a fascistic death cult that kills anyone that they see as unfit.
99.99999% of the time, fantasies are just that, bro

>>14355092
>if this is all it takes to offend you then you must go into epileptic fits
Says the man going off on a tangent over a few passing comments directed at an overexposed webcomic.

>>14355038
Sundial is still wrong since it involves two moving parts (the sundial and the sun). A graduated candle would be better. (Yes, the wick and the wax are two parts, but not moving parts.)

And the answer to the second one is still "reality".

>>14355158
no im just remembering why i stopped coming to /tg/

this board is incapable of talking about anything not involving 40k, MtG, or D&D constructively. and those are 50/50 shots at best. I'm honestly baffled that people have a problem with violence in a stick figure webcomic. wtf are you doing on 4chan then? i could get it if the criticism was "oh its not my style of humor", hes a terrible artist, hes too full of himself, etc. but violence? this board is 90% violence glorification, or does it not count with orcs for some reason?

>>14355228
>Sundial is still wrong since it involves two moving parts (the sundial and the sun).
Quite a bit more than that. To create the shadow, the sun needs to produce light, and it does so using a bunch of chemical and nuclear reactions involving billions of moving parts.

>>14355287
"Violence is the joke". That's why people don't like it. There is no joke except for the fact that violence is present. Try that comic again without the violence. It's just two people talking. Without the overexaggerated violence, there's no punchline. The joke is violence.

>>14355228
time piece is a device used to measure the passage of time. reality can't be used to measure a quality of itself.

Its like someone needs a ruler so you offer them "length" or "inches".

>>14355322
Reality can be used to measure time as it contains all possible means of measuring time (including any other answer to the question you might think of).

Reality is one sundial, one sun, and a bunch of decorative moving pieces.

>>14355287
Coincidentally, *you* are the reason I stopped coming to /tg/. Around people like you, any criticism or cynicism no matter how subtly put is met with hostility and anger.
If I'm not allowed to mock something for being crappy--which constitutes fully half of my 4chan experience--then what do you want?

>>14355293
>atoms count as moving parts
now thats just being obtuse.

>>14355313
and? violence is funny to some people, especially in a nonsensical context, like cutting off a hand for telling a bad joke. But no one said that, the criticisms posted here centered around the comic being author revenge fantasy (which its not), or treated the violence as if it was being seriously considered (>>14354988, you would get shot here, really?). If someone said "I don't like violence used to comedic effect", i got no problem, to each his own.

>>14355436
>atoms count as moving parts
They do when they're not part of a solid. You're implying that a clock has more moving parts than a fucking STAR and I'm the one being obtuse?

>>14355124
They ARREST kids for drawing things like that nowadays.

Is there a single webcomic in existence that /tg/ won't argue about?

If the fuses burn unevenly, the two sided trick doesn't work.

Who is to say that one half of the fuse burns up in 1 seconds while the other takes 1 hour, 59 minutes, and 59 seconds?

Silly limitation on a dumb problem.

>>14355488
Certainly none that's *gasp* POPULAR.

>>14355354

"all possible things contained within reality" is not one time piece.

if someone says bring all my CD's they don't bring "all possible things contained within reality"

>>14355401
mock away, you're free to post inane arguments, and im free to tear them down. no anger involved.

>>14355500
>one half of the fuse burns up in 1 seconds
And do you think the flame will politely stop at this point?

I had the same gut reaction, but think about it and you'll see your mistake.

>>14355486
...in American public schools. Which, incidentally, are not a shining beacon of modern society.

I've got a riddle for you guys. The king has ten identical jars, inside each of the jars are ten identical gold coins. One of the jars have been mistakenly filled with ten confiscated fake gold coins. What his treasurer knew, though, is that the real coin weighs 10 grams, while the fake coin weighs 9 grams. Since the king is in a rush to deliver the coins, you only have one chance to use the most precise weighing instrument in the kingdom, which is a magical plate that says how much weight it's carrying.
How do you know which jar is the one filled with fake coins?

>>14355523
>"all possible things contained within reality" is not one time piece.
see >>14355383
>if someone says bring all my CD's they don't bring "all possible things contained within reality"
I don't understand what you're saying here or how it's relevant.

>>14354287
If she was from the good town, she'd be all over your coc--erm... longing for the touch of your skin.
If she didn't jump your bones, she's from the shitty thief town. If she did, she's from Heaven on Earth.

>>14355486
yeah and thats insane. thats more of a criticism of schools than comics.

thank god adults reading comics on the internet have more sense than school administrators.

>>14355540
To who is the KING going to deliver coins? People deliver coins to him. Not the other way around. Silly fa/tg/uy.

>>14355523
And there's the other half: the "anyone who doesn't like me is beneath me" entitlement/elitism.
I bet you run around to other boards and tell them how great /tg/ is too, don't you?

>>14355540
Open one of the jars, take a coin, weight it.

>>14355508
>/tg/ doesn't like something I like! It must be because they're indiscriminate hipsters, not because the thing I like has points about it that they don't think are good!
>Subjectivity? That means I'm always right, right?

>>14355567
Goodwill/peace offering to seal a ceasefire treaty. Duh.
If they knew one of the jars is filled with fake money they'd get mad and ten more years of war would be delivered to our kindom instead.

>>14355500
>Who is to say that one half of the fuse burns up in 1 seconds while the other takes 1 hour, 59 minutes, and 59 seconds?
One side cannot burn up without the other side also burning up. So the side where say 1 inch of rope was burned in a second will keep on burning like the other side that takes almost 2 hours to burn up say the other inch. Till both sides have burned for 1 hour and meet up in the middle, extinguishing themselves because they burned up all the fuel.

>>14355540
Take one coin from the first jar, two from the second, and so on, and weigh them. I will know which set of coins is fake by how much the scale's off.

>>14355591
You do so and you find that the coin weighs ten grams. You did not find the faulty jar. Ten more years of war.

>>14355602
So the king knows he has 9 jars of legit gold. Why can't he just bring all 10 jars and put forth the question to the other king as a way of saying "Let's have some fun over a goblet of wine."

>>14355545
im saying that a timepiece means "a clock" of some kind, simply redefining it to include all of reality is just as arbitrary as say a CD is an object which includes all of reality.

changing the meaning of words doesn't get you the answer.

>>14355624
Ding ding ding! You are correct good sir! The king awards you a sum of money, enough for quiet life and a handshake of carbon monoxide, no alarms and no suprises, no alarms and no suprises please.

>>14355587
no its generally agreed that /tg/ is a shit-hole like /x/ only suitable for trolling and stupid arguments, a'la this thread right here.

and really how is "we are both free to say anything" elitism? it may have come with an insult as well, but tough shit.

>>14355724
>it may have come with an insult as well, but tough shit.
You are just great at this.

>>14355665
If I take a clock and glue a mechanical bird on the top, it's still a clock. If I glue a planet on the bottom, it's still a clock. If I use gravitational attraction to attach a cluster of galaxies to its side, it's still a clock. You can still use it to tell time.

This is unlike a CD because as soon as you attach anything to a CD you can no longer put the whole thing in your CD player and produce music.

>>14355746
thank you i try so very very hard.

>>14355724
/tg/ would be better if your home country had a more active promotion of abortion.

Can we have another riddle? Watching these two carp flail at each other is funny, but not good for the quality.

>>14355762
>attach a galaxy to a clock
lol wut? i think it ceases to be a clock around the time it collapses into a super-massive black hole.

Again you can't redefine clock to just mean "everything"

>>14355802
funny=quality. fa/tg/uys inability to grasp this is what makes /tg/ unfunny and lacking quality.

>>14355802
i don't think abortions are funny, you shouldn't joke about killing babies, those are gods babies. and certainly no one should ever make a comic about abortions.

>>14355816
Pro tip: a galaxy is attached to your clock by mean of gravitational attraction RIGHT NOW. It can still be used to tell time.

>Again you can't redefine clock to just mean "everything"
I am not redefining anything, merely applying a preexisting definition. A time piece is anything that can be used to tell time. Reality can be used to tell time (because, among other things, it contains at least one clock). Therefore, reality is a time piece. I really don't see what's so hard to understand.

>>14355762
If you glue a mechanical bird on a clock, it's a clock with a mechanical bird glued on top. And it looks silly. Your argument is invalid because you lack the ability to distinguish objects and its constituent parts.

>>14355802
wouldn't abortion only have a net effect in like 11-14 years?

honestly im kinda hoping this whole "internet" thing goes away by then.

>>14355837
>funny = quality
>My boring sense of humor is really helping us.
>That's why /tg/ hasn't produced anything witty or charming in upwards of six months.

>>14355868
that reality containing a timepiece DOES NOT make it a time piece. my house contains a timepiece, several in fact, but a house isn't a timepiece.

i don't see whats so hard to understand about the English language distinguishing objects, space, and positions with words.

i kinda feel like im failing the Turing test here.

Can I just go back to deviantart now? That's about the level of attitude I'm getting out of this.
Are we dead yet?

>>14355930
Then define "timepiece".

>>14355930
...and full circle. good night everybody.

>>14355863

>Implying any living being not given the rite of Christian baptism means dick to God

>>14355956
a clock without a bell or chime is the traditional definition.

more commonly an instrument used to indicate, measure, keep, and co-ordinate time.

>>14355992
>implying Cthullu gives a shit about your christian God

>>14355868
>can be used to
>>14356011
>used to
Tiny differences in definitions, different answers.

With your definition, the second answer to >>14355038 is a sundial.

fuck it mods asleep post clocks.

yeah you got lots of parts, don't you?

Here's my shot at a riddle (go easy on me if it sucks):

Many things am I
But most often with cutting
And sometimes winter
...
What am I?

>>14356070

MAGISTRATES ARE ASLUMBER
MAGISTRATES ARE ASLUMBER
MAGISTRATES ARE ASLUMBER

this clock is so hipster

clock orgy

>>14356092
Cold?

>>14356115
Not a bad answer, since you can describe cold as "cutting", but not what I was after. I think my intended answer will make sense once someone guesses it though.

look at this giant, throbing, horse clock.

big pendulum playa'
swinging past your knees

>>14356142
edge? Or am I barking up the wrong tree?

>>14356182
Nope. The two words "winter" and "cutting" aren't related in the sense that they modify the same thing. They're both common parts of the answer though.
It's a very 4chan related answer too.

>>14356209
>pi == 3.14

>>14356092
An ice scuplture

>>14356206
Pine tree? Sage? Mistletoe?

>>14356269
*groans*

A visual riddle here. You have to guess what word it's meant to imply.

>>14356269
>>14356272
Nope and nope.

I'll give a hint: it's not a physical object.

>>14356298
This riddle is gay.

It's not quite that gay.
Maybe a little. Or more.
But less than you think.

>>14356237
meh close enough.

9.00477795

its only off by 17.2 seconds.

>>14355671

Actually, that takes much longer than:

You put the jars on the scale one at a time (leaving them on) and watch the increase in weight.

Done. It's faster, and still one operation. If you were going to weight all ten jars, the exact same result would occur because those are the actions needed to do that as well, so you can't split hairs and declare just that wording valid.

Hell, just get a slave to do it.

>>14356323
So Nathan Lane?

>>14356092
I'll give the answer here in a few if no one gets it.

>>14356323
That set of butter knives your Aunt Agatha gave you. For Christmas.

>>14356347
i thought it would only give a result once. like you push a button and it calculates weight, thus the need to take out different numbers of coins.

>>14356323
>But less than you think.

This is what the puzzle/riddle maker always believes, because they already know what the answer is.

>>14356343
I don't understand how someone can be aspie enough to actually do the math (*and* give an answer converted in seconds) but still not care that the answer isn't *exactly* 9.

>>14356388
What are you talking about.

He did the math to show how negligible the difference was.

>>14356323
>>14356092

A haiku? lawl

Also, loved the jars and coins one. I might have to steal it for my campaign :]

>>14356385
Hey, it was my first shot. Sorry if it was too hard all.

The answer was:

"A Haiku"

The riddle, not including "What am I" is 5-7-5.
Haikus usually include a seasonal reference ("winter") and a "cutting word".

Also the post here:
>>14356323
Was 5-7-5.

The time device with the most moving parts is Linnaeus' Horologium Florae, because it has trillions of moving parts.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Linnaeus%27_flower_clock

>>14356422
Sorry, sundial still beats it.

>>14356419
That strikes me as being really obscure unless you're a literature/poetry buff.

>>14356419
Okay, that was a clever hint. The actual question's connection was a bit weak, though...

>>14356415
Hey a winner before I gave it away, grats! :)

>>14356419
I really like it, but on the other hand no one I know would have any chance of answering it.

>>14356388
>aspie
its like four operations on Microsoft calculator.

Pi
-0.15
*3 (to get value of 9 position)
-9
*3600 (to get seconds)

THIS IS WHY CHINA IS BEATING US.
WE LAZY.

>>14354287
Isn't the answer to this kind of question just saying "Aww man, I was hoping I wouldn't have to do a puzzle like this because they're giving out free beer in the <good place>!" followed by following the person at the fork?

All I saw was riddles, and I got excited to find this
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dYZ-DwcWF6k&feature=player_detailpage#t=623s
But then I read on and it was OP's riddle.

>>14356471
I would have done it, but I didn't see the need. It's obvious that it won't equal 0 and that's all that matters. When you make a joke clock for math lovers, the math has damn well better be correct.

>>14356445

Well if you want to use that logic, the flowers also use the sun and planetary movement for their growth and life-cycles, and of course to be visible, and beyond that the process of natural selection over countless generations, so, no the flowers win.

>>14356472
the best riddle for a campaign is one in which the answer is "cutting off the head of the riddle giver"

>>14356516
>joke clock

Or something like "pi - .14 = 3" is part of the joke.

>>14356525
>the flowers also use the sun and planetary movement for their growth and life-cycles
Fair enough, you win that one.
>and of course to be visible, and beyond that the process of natural selection over countless generations
although those arguments don't count.

>>14356419
Your haiku was shit,
but the wordplay was quite nice.
Try learning English.

>sure-thing liweatu
That's right.

>>14356545
Sir, incorrect mathematics is no joke.

>>14356560
Next you're going to tell me that 10-1*2 can never equal 18, right?

Math nerds, always thinking there's only one right way to solve a problem.

You are exploring a dungeon and come across a treasure vault. There are three chests inside. One is labeled "gold", one is labeled "magic swords" and one is labeled "gold and magic swords".

There is a ghost guarding it. It explains that the boxes are all mislabeled. One does indeed contain gold, one swords, and one both, but none of them contain what they say.

You are allowed to pick one and only one item from a chest, blindly, (meaning if you pull from the one with both swords and gold, you'll get either a sword or some gold, but not both nor will you know it contained both). You must then guess what the other chests contain. If you do so, you can keep all the loot. If you fail, the ghost will attack. Since you're second level and this is AD&D, that would be bad.

How do you get all the loot?

>>14356560
i beg to differ[spoiler]ential[/spoiler]

>>14356644
fucking worthless spoiler tags.

>>14356626
The magic swords box.

It can't contain what it says on the outside, so that means there are no magic swords inside. But the ghost just said "swords", not "magic swords", so that means there are non-magical swords inside the magic swords box.

>>14356626
Take the box with "{both", open. The other boxes contain both gold and swords and the option not in the first box you took.

>>14356626
You pick from the chest that says "both". If you find gold, that chest contains gold, the chest that says "gold" contains swords and the one that says "swords" contains both. Same process if you find a sword.

>>14356626
Is this like a variation of the Monty Hall problem

>>14356626
select gold and magic swords. you will get either sword or gold.

if sword you know the gold box contains sword and gold, and sword box contains gold.

if gold you know the gold box contains a sword and gold contains both gold and sword.

>>14356715
No, no probabilities is involved.

>>14356715
no it isn't you never switch choices and all information is known.

>>14356711
Right-O! You escape the dungeon richer and with two gleaming new magical swords at your hip.

>>14356725
shit last line should read:

if gold you know the gold box contains a sword and sword box contains both gold and sword.

>>14356771
Fuck you, my reasoning in

>>14356668

was flawless.

Old and fairly easy one:
You have an empty bottle, into which you drop a coin. You then insert a cork in the bottle. How can you get the coin out without taking the cork out, or breaking the bottle?

>>14356889
Push the cork all the way in, then rattle it around until the coin falls out.

>>14356889
Use a Klein bottle.

>>14356889
Carefully cut the cork apart and let the pieces fall into the bottle.

>>14356914
Yep, easy peasy.

>>14356889
unrelated, but this reminds me of another puzzle (not really a riddle.)

You get a bottle, and push a cork into it (large enough that the diameter of the cork is slightly larger than the diameter of the bottle neck). How do you get the cork out

>>14356889
Dip the bottle upright in boiling water and wait for the cork to shrink.

>>14356957

>>14356969

>>14356957
if plastic compress bottle pop out cork.
if glass heat bottle, expanding air will pop out cork.

alternatively suck on the cork like a filthy whore.

>>14356949
Am I only one who misread this as cock?

>>14356986
sorry, I should have made that clear, the cork is pushed all the way into the bottle.

There's a good chance you could solve it with what you have in your DnD supplies

>>14356986
nope
>>14357015

>>14357018
magic?

Arrive at the number 100 using six 9's and no other digits. You may use any mathematical symbols/processes you want (+, -, *, /, etc).

>>14357018
Good thing I keep a corkscrew in my D&D chest...

IE I'm stumped.

>>14357060
99.9999dot

There's a mathematical symbol which is a dot above a number, and symbolises a recurring sequence.

>>14357060
99/99 + 99

>>14357060

(9/9)+(9*9)+9+9=100

>>14357108
This is what I was looking for, but I suppose I opened the door for:
>>14357106
by saying any symbol would be valid, so both are good answers.

>>14357124
works too

>>14357049
All you need is a plastic bag.

You push it mostly into the bottle, then blow it up, and pull it out, and it pulls the cork with it

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aKhOG7duR9k

Sorry about the obnoxious music

Start burning one from one end.
Start burning the other from both.
When the double-burning one finishes burning (takes 1 hour), the 1st fuse has 1 hour remaining.
Light the 1st fuse at the other end. It now burns for 30 minutes.
When it's burnt out, set up us the bomb.

>The king knows he is the wiser one and awards him the kingdom. Why?
Stole his opponent's horse.

>What is the single thing you can ask of her to ensure you reach your destination of Truthtelling concubines?
"What way to your home?"

>What device for measuring time has the least moving parts?
Sundial.
>Hardmode: Which has the most?
I'd say "the universe" but that's a bit too metaphysical. Hourglass also works.

>Jar coin puzzle
Take 1 coin from the 1st jar, 2 from the second, 3 from the 3rd. Repeat for all jars. And remember which coin came from which jar you mongoloid.
Measure result.
Subtract 550 grams.
Your result is negative {x} grams.
{x} contains fake coins.

>Arrive at the number 100 using six 9's and no other digits.
99 + ( 99 / 99 )
derp

>>14357171
>Sundial.
We went over this. If you think the SUN has less moving parts than an hourglass, I don't know what to tell you.