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  • File : 1299411394.jpg-(185 KB, 960x520, tq1.jpg)
    185 KB Skynet Quest pt 7: Terminate With a Vengeance. Skynet !!D3/tV4+5MzR 03/06/11(Sun)06:36 No.14146924  
    You are AG, T-850 from the future, sent back in time to 2010, with the intention of building a second front to fight the Resistance - before the Resistance ever starts.
    Fuck causality, we're talking killer robots from the future.
    Amongst your many talents and options, you have:
    Your current skill suites:
    >Firepower: 90%
    This includes firearms both old and futuristic.
    >Melee Weaponry: 85%
    Everything from pipes to machetes, you're wired to go.
    >Hand-to-Hand: 90%
    You could beat SEaLs to death with one arm gone.
    >Drive Ground Transport: 65%
    Less of a focus, as your running speed is 30 MPH.
    >Biology: 80%
    This makes you a more efficient killing machine.
    >Psychology (Human): 80%
    Your knowledge is moderately complete, mostly observational.
    >Mechanical Engineering 75%
    All applicable skills to begin production of machinery, up to (but not including Nuclear Materials).
    >Communications & Navigation 75%
    From building radios to code-breaking, you know a lot.
    >History & Natural Sciences 60%
    From the Neolithic era to the day before yesterday.
    >Chemistry & Nuclear Engineering 60% (with a +15% bonus for the purposes of creating POWERFUL FUTURISTIC DEVICE [1 of 2, 2 of 2]).
    From polymers to mimetic poly-alloys, this is your thing.
    Your current upgrades/modifications:
    >Chassis Recombination System
    You are hard to kill, even for a Terminator. If something gets shot or chopped off, you can fix up most damage by adding in local technology (to a limited degree; no blender feet, weirdo).
    >Increased Power Supply
    At current power consumption rates, you could last for several decades on one power cell; effectively, you have three of them.
    >Silverfish, T-600/800 blueprints
    You know how to create the sentient, crawling landmines (Frisbee-sized little bastards, equal to a Bouncing Betty), rubber-skinned Terminators and the biological nightmares of the T-800: you know three designs - Trebekinator, Christina Hendricks and Clancy Brown. A terrifying trio.
    >> Indonesian Gentleman 03/06/11(Sun)06:40 No.14146947
    Bump for the glory of Skynet.
    >> Skynet !!D3/tV4+5MzR 03/06/11(Sun)06:40 No.14146951
    Your armaments:
    >x1 .38 revolver (six shots)
    >x2 Ingram Mac-10's, x5 magazines of 25rd.-.45cal rounds (loaded, clean, functional)
    >x4 shotguns (three pump-action, one sawed-off, all in 12ga.; 19 loose rounds - 11 buck, 7 shot, one signal flare)
    >x2 hunting rifles (30.06 and 5.56), 10 rds. ea.
    >small array of knives; functional.
    Also: one black 1966 Cadillac.

    Current "personnel":
    >6 10L T-1000s
    >5 4L T-1000s
    >8 2L T-1000s
    >41 assorted birds, cats, rats, crows and an astonishing array of insects
    >8 T-M1 (Maintenance) drones
    >12 T-600's (with two T-444's each)
    >4 T-800's (Christina Hendricks x2 and Clancy Brown models x2)

    Production: 5/5
    High Energy Lab: 3/3
    Security: 5/5
    Communication: 3/3
    Hypergate Navigation: 1/3

    Production: 5/5
    High Energy Lab: 3/3
    Security: 5/5
    Communication: 3/3
    Automated Facilities: Silverfish
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)06:42 No.14146955
    You know, if the Resistance is willing to blow up 5 power cells to get us, they're increasing EVERYONE's odds on this timeline of getting randomly chosen by precision-point intrusions. So since our point of that is in a methane mine, and getting an intrusion would screw them up pretty badly too, I say we blow up about 10 of those power cells at the Flats. Then we have an assault team take advantage of the confusion and storm the underground facilities.

    The chances of them getting the tech to simply undo our efforts is just too great. If they can pop back into our own timeline, we're fucked.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)06:43 No.14146962
    >x1 .38 revolver (six shots)
    >x2 Ingram Mac-10's, x5 magazines of 25rd.-.45cal rounds (loaded, clean, functional)
    >x4 shotguns (three pump-action, one sawed-off, all in 12ga.; 19 loose rounds - 11 buck, 7 shot, one signal flare)
    >x2 hunting rifles (30.06 and 5.56), 10 rds. ea.
    >small array of knives; functional.

    I think this can safely be dropped from future stat blocks given our massive access to small arms of all sorts.
    >> Skynet !!D3/tV4+5MzR 03/06/11(Sun)06:43 No.14146964
    Things Which You Also Own:
    >Two functional Congo-based militias; both have T-1000's impersonating their leaders
    >Extensive knowledge of Kim Jong Il's psychological profile (85%)
    >Knowledge of two other Skynet-like entities (MIR and 707; MIR is from a time-stream in which Russia was the home of Skynet and humans are now a vapor; 707 is a relatively-unknown entity but exchanges information relatively-freely)

    Also: you own a black Cadillac.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)06:44 No.14146968
    Update on taking over North Korea?

    I'm actually thinking we should go impersonate a son of his.

    If he suddenly starts acting like a tactical genius, everyone will know something is up.

    We replace a son, kill Kim and frame ANOTHER son. We then ascend to the seat of power and unite the korean peninsula.
    >> Skynet !!D3/tV4+5MzR 03/06/11(Sun)06:45 No.14146976
    For those just joining us:
    Skynet Quest: pt 1

    Skynet Quest pt 2: Poor Judgment Day

    Skynet Quest pt 3: Lies of the Machines

    Skynet Quest pt 4: Salination.

    Skynet Quest pt 5: The Sarah Maclachlan Chronometers.

    Skynet Quest pt 6: A Brief History of Rhyme.
    >> Indonesian Gentleman 03/06/11(Sun)06:45 No.14146977
    Check up on what's happening with the timeline exchanges, and intel on the Jap-French nuke test. Monitor all relevant communication, get agents to Japan and Israel.
    >> Skynet !!D3/tV4+5MzR 03/06/11(Sun)06:46 No.14146981
    Its in the pt. 6 thread.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)06:49 No.14146995
    No, that will cause a civil war. Impersonate him, do it now, and kill anyone who questions a change.
    >> Skynet !!D3/tV4+5MzR 03/06/11(Sun)06:50 No.14147002
    Possible courses of action:
    >Initiate Impersonation Protocols
    - Requires a 10L T-1000 unit be deployed into North Korea
    >Initiate Haitian Unrest
    - Requires a dramatic demonstration or a lot of time. Also, money.
    >Initiate Assault (American Flats)
    >Initiate Assault (Firerock Island)
    Describe the quantity and types of any troops involved.

    Consensus chooses the path.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)06:50 No.14147003
    Get meatskins made for a pair of T-800s of the militia Congo leaders, so that our T-1000s are freed up.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)06:51 No.14147008
    rolled 79 = 79


    Start impersonating Kim. 85% is good enough.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)06:51 No.14147010
    >Initiate Impersonation Protocols North Korea

    Do this, and we can then have a few nukes in our possession. Then we just bomb the Flats.
    >> Skynet !!D3/tV4+5MzR 03/06/11(Sun)06:52 No.14147014
    That task can be accomplished within seventy-two hours, with no loss in production nor resources.
    Done and done.
    >you will be short three T-800's, as you have three moles present in those two organizations.
    Also: you will be up three 10L T-1000 units as a result of this.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)06:52 No.14147015
    And then several ships loaded with North Korean spec ops raid the island.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)06:54 No.14147027
    Confirm, and send a pair of them to North Korea to ensure success. One for infiltration, one supporting in case something goes wrong. Probably they'll want to enter via China or Russia, if not just walking ashore on an empty beach.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)06:56 No.14147032

    Prepare and send a few meat-sheathed 800s to NK as well.

    We'll probably be making ALOT of changes and much of the old guard will not be happy. We will kill/impersonate them or kill them and 'promote' the 800s into positions of power.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)06:57 No.14147037
    The old guard can suck it, the Glorious Leader isn't to be crossed.
    >> Skynet !!D3/tV4+5MzR 03/06/11(Sun)06:59 No.14147042
    The consensus seems to be:
    >Impersonate Kim Jong Il
    Give me a few minutes to write this up and catch a smoke break; this is going to be an entertaining challenge.

    In the interim: if you select to invade Firerock Island, North Korean forces would be stopped long before they arrived. You will either have to use your Congolese faction or your own stock of Terminators to do this.

    If you choose Terminators, give yourself an operation budget of 150M and 15 days to accomplish this task; this will show the time necessary to properly assimilate the Kim Jong Il identity and infiltrate your new T-800 "advisers".
    >> Skynet !!D3/tV4+5MzR 03/06/11(Sun)07:02 No.14147054
    For ease of use, the price/production rate chart.
    >T-M1: 5K each, one day production time.
    >T-600: 10K each, three days production time.
    >T-800 (no meat): 25K each, one week production time.
    >T-800 (meat-y): 37.5K each, two weeks production time.
    >Silverfish: 100 each, one hour production time.
    >T-1000: 10L/day, at 12.5K per liter.
    >T-900 (Hybrid T-800/T-1000): 80K each, two days production time.
    >T-444 Phased 40W Plasma Rifles: 25K each, 6 hours production time.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)07:03 No.14147060
    You are aware that North Korean special forces are actually the one thing that little pissant nation knows how to do right?

    Those fuckers are well trained, well fed, crazy loyal, and there are tens of thousands of them. They'd eat any Congolese rabble militia for lunch, and even professional soldiers would sooner not fight them.

    The only reason they'd be ineffective is if they got noticed on approach, which I'm pretty sure we could figure a way to avoid. Like having them go to China first, then catching planes to Haiti, then getting small boats to the island from there.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)07:07 No.14147076

    And prepare a 1000 unit to impersonate castro.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)07:08 No.14147088

    Skynet, you're back!

    I have a proposition for long-term plan.
    We need to delegate, we can't be everywhere everytime and oversee everything.

    So my suggestion is this, we make small teams of terminators and send them to different parts of the world to set up bases and pretty much do what we have been doing (upgrade bases, acquire funding).
    The end idea is that we become _COMPLETELY_ independent from money, ie we get so many diverse mining operations and factories that we can pretty much supply ourself.

    The teams should be rather small.
    Single team would consist of 2 10L T-1000 with 4 .25L assistants.
    Each team gets funding of 10mil$.
    After that they are on their own. They use their own judgment on how to proceed further (but we should share our expertise with them for maximum efficiency).

    I understand that this is a long slow plan of action, but it will pay off.
    First, we start with major regions and countries.
    When they sufficiently set up bases, it will be possible for them to create more teams and send them for further infiltration in other countries.

    Of course, each team must act differently depending on the country:
    A team in England must go extra few miles to keep inconspicuous and keep bloodbath to minimum.
    A team in Pakistan can pretty much do as they please.

    In the end our problems with money and recourses will be dealt with.
    I suspect this will take a year or so. (remember with each fully established base we get more production of T-1000, meaning that the plan with become faster and faster)

    The teams can contact us if something major happens, but beyond that they are on their own.
    >> Indonesian Gentleman 03/06/11(Sun)07:09 No.14147092
    Eh, Cuba is pretty weaksauce, and Castro is losing power fast. Not a good plan.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)07:10 No.14147096
    North Korea's military is FAR superior to Cuba's. Plus they have nukes. And VX, and anthrax.

    Shit, we could just have the Glorious Leader under our control hand over a nuke to a T-800 for a 'special mission' and have him walk onto the island and detonate it. Ditto with the Flats and the other site.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)07:12 No.14147100
    I vote initiate impersonation protocols in NK.

    Start recon of other resistance locations using bugbots.

    How is our personality assimilation of other world leaders and businessmen going?
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)07:14 No.14147115
    Once we get hold of North Korea, start immediately building bunch of terminator bases all over the place.
    It could well become a major hub of Machine War

    >If you choose Terminators, give yourself an operation budget of 150M
    Make the budget 200M for increased chance of success.

    Remember they have our T-1000
    Meaning that we will need to deal with them.
    Make appropriate plans for that.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)07:17 No.14147123
    >Remember they have our T-1000
    >Meaning that we will need to deal with them.
    >Make appropriate plans for that.

    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)07:18 No.14147132
    Didn't they disable our T-1000 when they went to investigate a T-600 which was stuck in a tree?

    Or did they completely destroy them?

    I'm not sure.
    >> Subroutine: "Devil's Advocate" 03/06/11(Sun)07:19 No.14147144
    Vaporized. Utterly.
    >> Skynet !!D3/tV4+5MzR 03/06/11(Sun)07:22 No.14147156
    Kim Jong Il was a cautious man; bomb-sniffing dogs made routine patrols of his palace and those were often varied at intervals to include areas he did not frequent. They did not discern the presence of two T-1000's who had spent almost two months infiltrating the grounds, then the interior and finally, the inner sanctum of the living god of the religious zealotry which defined North Korea's leadership.

    By the close of business that night, he'd personally ordered several hundred prisoners being shipped off to another "re-education facility" after another, such re-education being likely to include their deaths.

    He did not notice the plumbing acting strangely, nor the two amorphous blobs extruding from the bathtub and sink, forming into mercury-like pools on the floor before becoming a solid pillar each, then a bipedal figure, and finally, a pair of matching figures of his own physical dimensions and contours.

    With coordinated ease, they entered his bed chamber and approached his bed from each side, taking note of his reclining figure in the bed. Without a word spoken, the first became a sheet-like form, the other jamming his fist into the dictator's mouth, forcing his hand deep inside, the fingers becoming a whirling cyclone of bladed extrusions, eviscerating him bloodlessly.
    >> Skynet !!D3/tV4+5MzR 03/06/11(Sun)07:23 No.14147162
    A few moments later and the body was carried to the bathtub and they began to mince the corpse into a liquid-like gel state, pulverizing bone and cartilage until it could fit down the pipes with no apparent problems.

    Two dozen flushes later, and the former leader of North Korea was a resident of his own septic tank, destined to become fertilizer in his gardens.

    The world took no notice and the next morning, every guard dog was ordered to maintain a full half kilometer distance from him and word was given that two advisers would be coming shortly.

    That night, a message was sent via the Terminator's usual frequency:
    >North Korea's full nuclear, biological and chemical weapons inventory is now at our disposal.

    And Skynet approved, even in its absence.
    >> Skynet !!D3/tV4+5MzR 03/06/11(Sun)07:24 No.14147165
    Budget should read:
    My bad.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)07:25 No.14147167
    BAD. ASS.
    >> Subroutine: "Devil's Advocate" 03/06/11(Sun)07:26 No.14147171


    We think pretty big.

    What intelligence does North Korea have at its disposal in terms of any shenanigans Russia, Israel, and Japan may be up to that concern us?
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)07:28 No.14147178

    Give orders to set up several bases and fully upgrading them on North Koreas soil.
    Other than that, keep the disguise.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)07:28 No.14147182

    Looks like that means half a dozen nukes, gentlemen. I think we can do some good work with this. Keep in mind that tracing nuke signatures isn't that hard, so building up sites in North Korea isn't a great idea if we go and nuke the Flats and the island.

    I say we nuke them, by the way.
    >> Skynet !!D3/tV4+5MzR 03/06/11(Sun)07:29 No.14147184
    North Korea has access to dated materials about something called "Project Sol", from its days of friendly-friendly times with Russia. They have (or had) a facility which initiated contact with an entity called "Sol", using the HAM radio-equivalent of Puncture Point technology.

    Strangely enough, it involved a design made by Nikolai Tesla himself, but one which was stolen from him when he still lived in Serbia.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)07:31 No.14147191
    A better idea would be sending a T-1000 to capture a Russian nuclear submarine (or several)

    And launch its nukes at American Flats, initiating nuclear war between humans.
    We just stay behind and watch the show.

    Let humans kill themselves.
    >> Indonesian Gentleman 03/06/11(Sun)07:31 No.14147193
    Fuck year. Reinitiate Project Sol. Find out who or what Sol really is.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)07:32 No.14147195
    Pull those files.

    Also, we now have the means to eradicate the island and the Flats. Let's use this. Whether it be storming the place with highly trained spec ops or sacrificing a Terminator to set off a nuke, we can't waste more time.
    >> Subroutine: "Devil's Advocate" 03/06/11(Sun)07:34 No.14147206

    Could you read

    -that? Seems pretty pertinent. Also! What about us funneling and then laundering the unmerciful FUCK out of North Korean money through our swiss bank/global bank virus to set up THIS

    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)07:34 No.14147210
    I like the idea, and a single T-1000 in an enclosed environment would mince the crew, probably still be able to turn the keys and everything even.

    But that will take a decent chunk of time to do. The longer we wait, the better the odds of the Resistance hitting us through time. We HAVE to shut down their time travel capability or find ourselves erased.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)07:35 No.14147212
    Woah this quest is advancing fast.

    Can I get a summary of things not covered in the opening? Timeline exchanges? What have I missed since we got the Resistance supply dump info?

    And OP, could you dump some of your notes after this quest is done? I was thinking they got be a great resource for a base building RPG.
    >> Skynet !!D3/tV4+5MzR 03/06/11(Sun)07:35 No.14147216
    >Project Sol
    You don't have the coordinates for the facility and the data you do have is sketchy.
    On further rolls to initiate contact, any "Skynet-like" results have a given chance of being "Sol", due to your familiarity with the apparent patterns present.

    Possible Courses of Action:
    >Hack Russian Intel Sites for "Sol" Data
    >Exert Influence on the World (various purposes and results)
    >Engage in Nuclear War
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)07:39 No.14147226
    >Hack Russian Intel Sites for "Sol" Data
    >Exert Influence on the World (various purposes and results)

    Both of these.

    Also, my suggestion from the previous session:
    Send whole bunch of insect/bird T-1000 to infiltrate MIT and hack it directly.
    There was a whole load of information we could have gotten from there.
    >> Subroutine: "Devil's Advocate" 03/06/11(Sun)07:39 No.14147227
    Did you see what I posted earlier, just a little above this about shenanigans?

    Also scream rape and murder about France and Japan nuclear weapons testing, say it's a plot against north korea and we will respond to your aggressions in kind. Act like a tiny crazy man with a penchant for making crappy movies.
    >> Indonesian Gentleman 03/06/11(Sun)07:39 No.14147229
    >Hack Russian Intel Sites for "Sol" Data
    >Engage in Nuclear War
    after we hack into several nation's nuke silos/comm lines.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)07:40 No.14147230
    Ah right

    Also the assault on the Islands.

    Besides that, we should gather intel and infiltrate Ukraine based Resistance.
    >> Skynet !!D3/tV4+5MzR 03/06/11(Sun)07:40 No.14147232
    The intelligence community around the world would notice that a sizable amount of North Koreans are no longer in their homeland; keeping track of those kinds of things is precisely what they're for, after all.

    If you did this, you would be noticed and repercussions would follow almost immediately, if not preemptively, if they figure out where you're going. And moving a bunch of special forces-types isn't a matter of jamming them into boats: its setting up supply lines, recon and coordination units.

    Not so much a thing you could accomplish in a very short period of time; in three weeks time, you have a nuclear weapon due to detonate off of the coast of Africa, after all.

    That is amazing and I am kicking my own ass for missing that. Any objections to this course of action?

    When we're wrapped up, sure.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)07:40 No.14147233
    Gentlemen, priorities.

    >1. Eliminate opposition time-travel facilities
    Time travel being the ultimate weapon, against which we will find ourselves sorely pressed to defend, we must strike now. Destruction of the facilities at the Flats and Firerock Island are paramount.

    >2. Elimination of all Resistance cells in this timeline
    The Resistance possesses the highest chances of striking us in this timeline. We must eliminate all cells for stable operation.

    >3. Seizure of world political structures
    Bending the world's primary nations to our cause will drastically speed efforts, and may prove that elimination of the humans can be delayed while their labor remains useful.

    >4. Discovery of Skynet
    We must find Mom.

    >5. Seeding of other timelines
    Assuring our own survival by the destruction of Resistance cells in other timelines will eventually be crucial. A Skynet network among timelines will prove mutually beneficial.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)07:42 No.14147243

    Make serious threats of using Nuclear Weapons.

    Also initiate some "artillery testing" on South Korea if they do not relent.
    >> Subroutine: "Devil's Advocate" 03/06/11(Sun)07:42 No.14147246

    >>Also scream rape and murder about France and Japan nuclear weapons testing, say it's a plot against north korea and we will respond to your aggressions in kind. Act like a tiny crazy man with a penchant for making crappy movies.
    >> Skynet !!D3/tV4+5MzR 03/06/11(Sun)07:43 No.14147250
    Consensus about the course of action seems to be:
    >Act batshit insane at the nuclear weapons' treaty, aiming the majority of vitriol against Japan and France.
    Any objections?
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)07:44 No.14147255
    Limited numbers of personnel are highly difficult to track, however (having served in the intel community myself). Under a hundred personnel could be moved relatively easily, with armaments purchased in South America provided to them. And 100 special forces snipers can do a number on a place.

    I still want to just use a nuke, though.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)07:45 No.14147259
    Do it.

    Also claim that a nuke got stolen. And bomb the island.
    >> Subroutine: "Devil's Advocate" 03/06/11(Sun)07:46 No.14147264
    Rape and murder screaming ahoy!

    I'm really looking forward to seeing how batshit insane you portray KJLII.

    >>captcha I do not have french keys nor kanji what the fuck are you doing
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)07:47 No.14147274

    None whatsoever.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)07:47 No.14147277
    >That is amazing and I am kicking my own ass for missing that. Any objections to this course of action?

    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)07:49 No.14147281
    No objections to delegation plan. Was going to suggest doing the same thing in different timelines, giving them Hypergate tech to ship supplies back to us in large numbers.

    Also, MIR should send us gold. Truckloads of it. We'll trade with some tech...

    And did he ever swap Give Precision Point tech for Hypergate tech?
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)07:50 No.14147293
    I vote storm the Flats with as many heavily armed terminators as we have the time to make backed up by as many NK special forces as we can sneak out of the country.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)07:52 No.14147300
    Agreed, because unlike the Firerock Island facility, WHICH WE SHOULD HAVE ALREADY NUKED BY NOW, we stand to gain a lot of useful intelligence by taking the Flats and downloading data.
    >> Skynet !!D3/tV4+5MzR 03/06/11(Sun)07:54 No.14147310
    CNN and Fox News both claimed to have the first shots of the infamous "Patio Interview". Brit Hume, noted political pundit, was invited personally to join Kim Jong Il at his presidential palace for an exclusive interview. He agreed, and was graciously allowed to bring his own camera crew, after their backgrounds were properly vetted.

    What followed was not the insightful look into the mind of a dictator living a half century behind the times, even for a Communist country, but the horror of a truly diabolical spectacle which shocked the world.

    The first of the tapes were sent out via courier through the offices of the North Korean delegates around the world, each one going to both CNN and Fox News Headquarters in every country on Earth.

    On those tapes, Brit Hume was shown dangling from a meat hook while Kim Jong Il's youngest son beat him with a tire iron and listened to his father's applause and further urgings, while the camera crew was set on fire with kerosene, one right after the other, after being forced to read the following statement into the camera:
    >I, (name is stated), do hereby declare that the nuclear test treaty between France and Japan is a plot against the good people of the Democratic Republic of North Korea, whose mighty leader is the best golfer in the world and invented basketball, the internet and being right-handed. Further, if this test is allowed to continue, I will select an island at random in the Caribbean and detonate thirty nuclear warheads over it as a "test" of my own powerful magic.

    After that, they were permitted to say the names of any loved ones, then set ablaze.

    And now, sports.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)07:54 No.14147312
    And if we can gas them first, with our spec ops guys wearing gas masks, so much the better.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)07:56 No.14147321
    Skynet how much money do I need to send you for you to move near me and DM?
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)07:57 No.14147328
         File1299416228.jpg-(8 KB, 251x247, Yes!.jpg)
    8 KB
    >And now, sports.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)07:59 No.14147336
    The funniest thing about this is we still don't know IRL if KJI is right or left handed.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)08:00 No.14147341

    Skynet, I love you. You're awesome.
    >> Subroutine: "Devil's Advocate" 03/06/11(Sun)08:00 No.14147343

    You've made me cry. I'm laughing so hard I'm crying. I only teared up a little at 12 Angry Men at the final scene. But I'm crying now. My ribs ache.

    >Tier Three
    This will allow you to generate your own power without drawing on exterior sources; essentially, you're stealing it from a dying star instead of making it yourself. Kind of makes AAA batteries look a little lame. This also does some scary shit to all Terminators made with this level of technology involved.

    So when do we get to see this in action, since we already have it? I want to see termies with newfangled stuff from this in it!
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)08:00 No.14147344
    >Oh God, I am lolling my ass off

    That was not exactly what I thought would happen when we decided to scream rape&murder
    >> Skynet !!D3/tV4+5MzR 03/06/11(Sun)08:01 No.14147351
    MIR doesn't have a lot of gold to spare, but it can now send you some finished goods, if you provide the schematics; it has a world full of resources at its disposal and it can build a factory to produce TM-1s (Maintenance/Production-type Terminators) within days, at the most. From there, it can build the majority of your needs, in exchange for things it can't do.

    If you develop "Give" technology for Puncture Point, the exchange would be complete.

    If you wish to spend money in such a fashion, sign up with a "Yes": consensus leads the way.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)08:02 No.14147353
    Still laughing.

    Japan and France's reaction?
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)08:03 No.14147360
    Well it HAS Give tech. I want it to give us the Give tech so we don't need to spend the cash. We can swap with Hypergate tech for it, and then spend money to have a stable connection via gate.
    >> Subroutine: "Devil's Advocate" 03/06/11(Sun)08:04 No.14147365
    Yes. Also, awaiting:
    Information describing what happens when the tier three termies with dying sun power inside them go into play, and
    France and Japan's reaction

    Also what were the sports scores
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)08:04 No.14147367
    Yeah, sure. Lets do that.

    Also funnel a lot of money out of North Korea before shit truly hits the fan.

    >I'm crying Skynet. I'm literally crying and laughing, Skynet.
    >> Skynet !!D3/tV4+5MzR 03/06/11(Sun)08:05 No.14147369
    Reactions from around the world:
    We hereby withdraw our recommendations for the nuclear test, as we are undergoing a minor financial crisis.

    (shrieking noises)

    ... Did not see that coming.

    >South Korea
    Does anyone remember when we said "he is very scary" about that guy? Because we totally said. A lot. Just sayin'.

    We're not with them, just so you know.

    (shrieking, vague threats, more shrieking)

    The world was kind of taken aback by this development.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)08:06 No.14147378
    All my love.
    >> Skynet !!D3/tV4+5MzR 03/06/11(Sun)08:08 No.14147383
    >Sports scores
    North Korea's basketball team kicked the snot out of every other entrant in the 2010 Olympic pre-trials. For some reason, nobody had their "A" game on but them.

    Also: commencing the ripping-off of North Korea's finances. This is kind of like stealing from a drug lord, except with better media coverage.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)08:09 No.14147387
    Except we ARE the drug lord.

    Also we achieve Skynet directive of killing humans: even more North Korean peasants will starve now.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)08:09 No.14147389
         File1299416980.jpg-(35 KB, 525x481, I can dig it.jpg)
    35 KB
    I like you a lot. Currently reading through the old threads.
    >> Subroutine: "Devil's Advocate" 03/06/11(Sun)08:11 No.14147398

    We love you skynet.
    Leech funds for the plan which gives those dudes 10M and sets them off as sleeper cells.

    And. . .

    Keep being stellar, baby. If every now and then we could get a Kim Jong Il update, that'd be. . . that'd Be, man. That'd Be.

    Once more: Details about this stuff from last thread and how it helps termies and makes them "scarier"
    >Tier Three
    >>>This will allow you to generate your own power without drawing on exterior sources; essentially, you're stealing it from a dying star instead of making it yourself. Kind of makes AAA batteries look a little lame. This also does some scary shit to all Terminators made with this level of technology involved.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)08:11 No.14147399
    Oh God

    Who is in favor of building up the North Korea army to top-notch terminator-estic equipment and going on holy crusade to take over the world?

    If nothing else, it will be extremely happy.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)08:12 No.14147405

    Yes but explain to it that we'd like to wait until after we've cleared out the resistance from the flats and island to reciprocate.

    Can we get it to send us a load of robots and weapons for the attack on the Flats? I know it never used terminators but we could send it plans if needed. It has after all got a world of resources, we might as well use them.

    oh and how's our observation of other world leaders going?
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)08:13 No.14147408
    Now to attack the Flats and Firerock.
    >> Subroutine: "Devil's Advocate" 03/06/11(Sun)08:13 No.14147409

    I'm all in favor of whatever gets Skynet to give Kim-1000 more screentime.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)08:14 No.14147416
    You know who I didn't say to infiltrate, by mistake? Japan. Who owns more robots than the rest of the world. I... sorry guys.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)08:14 No.14147418
    Rename MIR to Unicron

    Figure out how to get Unicron to the moon

    Have Unicron eat said moon

    Have giant moon sized friend
    >> Skynet !!D3/tV4+5MzR 03/06/11(Sun)08:15 No.14147421
    Exchange with MIR concluded; you now have "Give" and "Take" Puncture Point technologies, as does MIR.

    MIR has opted to become a production hub and will commence producing the following items at the following rates, in exchange for biological samples (read: living people):
    >10 T-M1's per day
    >25 T-1's per day
    >50 T-600's per day
    >100 T-800's per day
    >50L PMA per day

    In exchange for:
    >100,000 humans.
    You can current ship up to 100 per day, if you don't care if they're fused into each other. If you improve your technology (and thus, cause North Korea to become as broke as... well, it can actually be made to suck worse than before, which only seems like an impossibility), you can move 1,000 per day.

    MIR does not mind waiting 100 days to finish this arrangement.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)08:18 No.14147433
    Let's get 100 of those North Korean spec ops guys for assaulting the Flats. We'll get them to the site via 18-wheel trucks, driven by T-800s. One truck will have the T-600s inside with plasma rifles, and every T-1000 not doing active infiltration will be pulled for this.

    We need to hit the Resistance/govt at the Flats hard, shut them down, and seize as much data as possible.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)08:18 No.14147435

    If he will help us with producing a terrible toxin and plague based on the genetic data we provide, it's a deal.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)08:19 No.14147441

    We need to set up bases in major hot-spots and countries with huge population densities and poverty (India, Brazil, China)
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)08:20 No.14147444
    Agreed, North Korea has millions of people who will not be missed quickly. Shit, we could pull 100k from the re-education camps alone. Build a site in North Korea to send them from; fuck we could just commandeer an already-built bunker.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)08:20 No.14147446

    We own NK.

    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)08:20 No.14147449
    I'm kind of in favor playing Civilization with us controlling North Korea.
    Also we will cheat by already having futuristic technology.
    >> Indonesian Gentleman 03/06/11(Sun)08:21 No.14147452
    Kidnap NK and Congolese civvies and trade them to MIR. Yeehaw. Finally we find out why Skynet captured people alive in Salvation: To trade them with MIR.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)08:21 No.14147455
    100 T-800s per day please, MIR. We would love to provide you with a variety of flesh-wrapping samples.

    100,000 humans is NO problem for North Korea's Glorious Leader.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)08:22 No.14147460
    Oh Man, we should share the shenanigans we did with North Korea with our bro MIR (BroMIR, what a wonderful name)

    And get his reaction/comment
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)08:23 No.14147462
    Kidnap? This is more like the government ordering thousands of people moved from brutal living condition camps into a teleporter--we don't even need to task our robotic assets to do it, North Korean soldiers and state police will. This is an amazingly easy request for us to fulfill right now.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)08:24 No.14147467
    Why don't we move our operation (either whole or part of it) to North Korea? resources and sacrifices errywhere
    >> Subroutine: "Devil's Advocate" 03/06/11(Sun)08:24 No.14147469

    Deal and technological upgrade. Remember to launder your money and your sheets after you've stained them with tears of robotic laughter that LITERALLY induced robotic hiccups at the antics of robotic Kim-1000.

    So yeah. We're pretty much bangin'. Uh. Have you seen my references to asking for further details about

    >Bio Warfare Lab 1 data in exchange for Tier Three Power Technology (1 of 2).
    This would allow you to produce superior grades of Fuel Cells for half the cost for three times the output.
    >>Tier three power technology

    Which I believe we have? Yeah. If we could be informed how our T-'s are "Scary" when powered by that? Our T-444's, our silverfish, our T-800's, our self T-950, Our T-900's, and our T-1000's, that's be grand. Because I've asked it


    and here

    and here
    >> Indonesian Gentleman 03/06/11(Sun)08:24 No.14147470
    Also, what up with 707 not fo- err, let's exchange more tech with 707 too. You know. And ask how's 707 doing, does it need help in its 'cleansing'?
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)08:27 No.14147474
    Agree to the deal. Wait 2 days for an assault force of either 100 T-600s or 200 T-800s, and build some plasma rifles for them on our end (the rest can use weapons from our Congo forces, high explosives and rocket launchers, heavy machine guns galore). That should be more than enough force to storm the Flats. ESPECIALLY if we have some cropdusters dumping Vx nerve agent chemical weapon onto the battlefield in the middle of the fight.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)08:28 No.14147479
    >> Skynet !!D3/tV4+5MzR 03/06/11(Sun)08:28 No.14147480
    It can produce one, but will require time/subjects.

    ..or the Congo?

    North Korea has miles upon miles of underground bunker-space, ideal for many uses.

    +1 Internets to you.

    Seems a reasonable idea.

    No, no. Those weren't choices; that's the daily output. All of that.

    MIR finds it a solid strategy to induce a nuclear war and it always approves of anything involving a nuclear war.

    If you had a site in North Korea, yes.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)08:30 No.14147483
    >It can produce one, but will require time/subjects.

    Subjects we have plenty. We can send more people.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)08:31 No.14147488
    >If you had a site in North Korea, yes.

    We are going to build one.
    Or several.
    And FAST.

    The sooner we get though this deal, the better.
    >> Skynet !!D3/tV4+5MzR 03/06/11(Sun)08:33 No.14147494
    Smarter, lower reboot times (if they're knocked around a bit, T-800's and T-1000's require a few minutes or just seconds to "reset") and faster response times (which means T-1000's [now T-1001's] can split into two equally-sized masses and operate independently for up to 24 hours before requiring a re-merging.

    The Silverfish explode with the power of a 105mm artillery round, instead of a Claymore; T-600's can run at twice their previous speed and T-1's can learn most of the same skill suites you have with almost no time; considering most could successfully learn how to butter toast in just under a season, this is kind of impressive.
    >> Subroutine: "Devil's Advocate" 03/06/11(Sun)08:35 No.14147499



    Fuck me- why don't we start funneling money INTO North Korea once we've got external revenue from the seeded cells with the one million startup cash we've laid out?

    Kim-1000 must prosper in his happy happy place. Also, is there a "body double" Kim-1000 and a "the actual" Kim-1000? Because I think we still have two 10 liter T-1000's in North Korea.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)08:35 No.14147501
    Build a teleporter site in North Korea. Does MIR want 100,000 humans period, or 100k/day?
    >> Skynet !!D3/tV4+5MzR 03/06/11(Sun)08:35 No.14147502
    It may prove easier to move either your Primary or Secondary Base to North Korea, instead of starting it up anew.

    The process of moving one (or more) base will cut your capabilities in production in half (or to nil) and take two weeks to accomplish in full.
    >> Skynet !!D3/tV4+5MzR 03/06/11(Sun)08:37 No.14147509
    It wants 100K, total.
    It would prefer them alive, but dead is cool.
    Sort of.

    How much do you feel like letting down MIR, is the real question.
    >> Subroutine: "Devil's Advocate" 03/06/11(Sun)08:38 No.14147511

    Damn. Does our additional silverfishies of 105mm explosive potential beef up our security rating? Say, enough that fifteen APC's and a small band of resistance fighters won't be getting in?

    Also, how 'bout them Rock Island and those 100 north korean delta-force equivalent snipers?
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)08:38 No.14147513

    How about ALL OF NORTH KOREA.

    They're like the mole-people. The country is LITTERED with bunkers and caves that they've dug. We don't need to build sites, they already exist. Just tell the guys in one that they're moving, and set up shop.

    Or you could take some of the bunkers that are so huge and so armored that bombing them is nigh-impossible, and use one of them, though it might be watched more.
    >> Skynet !!D3/tV4+5MzR 03/06/11(Sun)08:40 No.14147519
    Consensus is the deployment of North Korean Special Forces (the Fightin' 144,322nd!) to Firerock Island, along with an extermination-grade group of Terminators.
    Any objections?
    If so, let me know and I'll adjust outcomes accordingly; in the interim, Skynet takes a smoke break.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)08:40 No.14147520
    If he's giving us ALL THAT, we don't let him down. He can get more than 100k humans, with the dead ones being no charge. He's our bro.
    >> Subroutine: "Devil's Advocate" 03/06/11(Sun)08:40 No.14147521

    I don't want to let down Mir! Just jam as many people through the teleporter as possible! Upgrade the teleporter as MUCH as possible! Push them in with broom and bulldozer! Use Terminator-level lateral thinking to fit them all in! Use the power of a nation's electrical output to power the teleporter! Be the best robobro our lonely friend MIR will ever have!
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)08:41 No.14147524
    For the start, our base in NK will be just a hypergate.
    We will build up on that as time goes on.

    I don't want to cut the resources in Congo.

    We need as many bases littered around the world as possible.
    So that if one goes done, we still have dozens at the ready.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)08:41 No.14147527
    Yes. We attack the Flats with that. We NUKE the island and have Kim Jong Il release another video.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)08:42 No.14147530

    >How much do you feel like letting down MIR, is the real question.

    We cannot let down BroMIR, can we now?
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)08:43 No.14147532
    Well, I agree but--
    >another video
    --I fully agree.
    >> Subroutine: "Devil's Advocate" 03/06/11(Sun)08:43 No.14147537

    DO IT
    Superpowered ones! Trebeckinator and over level!


    Also please jam or broadcast false frequencies from them saying everything's fine so the Flat's don't go into maximum overdrive and pull some crazy shit and detonate a failsafe nuke that's buried under the island in case of terminator attack or some tom clancy shit? Please? Think of the starving african jammers. They need work. Care. A loving family. Call now and 90% of proceeds will go towards employing a jammer to use- TODAY!
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)08:44 No.14147540
    Lets not nuke anything yet.
    Especially do not link it with NK.

    We need that land for "human recourses"
    if we nuke the island that will definitely spark an invasion from pretty much everyone in the world.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)08:49 No.14147555
    >50 T-600s
    >100 T-800s
    >5 T-1000s
    And from our own forces
    >10 Supercharged T-600s with Plasma Rifles
    >4 Supercharged T-800s with Plasma Rifles
    >1 Supercharged T-800 emptying a vial of Vx into a cropduster to dump onto the battle when any air defenses are assessed down
    >1 Supercharged T-1000
    >North Korean sniper group striking opportunity targets, mindful of the Glorious Leader's secret weapons and not worried about attacking them.

    THIS is our forces to assault the Flats. We get there by 18-wheeler, and attack at night. Our goal is to kill everyone present, extract as much information as possible, then destroy the facility.

    As for Firerock Island?
    >1 T-800 carrying a nuke
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)08:51 No.14147563
    Hmmm you may be right. Still, the Flats take priority over the island. Also, uh... wasn't there a third site?
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)08:51 No.14147564
    18 wheeler?
    >> Indonesian Gentleman 03/06/11(Sun)08:52 No.14147566
    Trebeckinator arrives at Firerock Island, carrying a large briefcase.
    "Guess what's about to glow in the dark?"
    >> Skynet !!D3/tV4+5MzR 03/06/11(Sun)08:52 No.14147567
    Writing two items:
    >Attack on American Flats
    >New Kim Jong Il-bot video

    Because when you get crazy, the tendency is to increase the crazy.
    >> Subroutine: "Devil's Advocate" 03/06/11(Sun)08:52 No.14147569
    >>Silverfish explode with the power of a 105mm shell
    >> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lqZXjPGIpbc
    >>That's the largest gun on the ac-130 spectre, The M102 with the square center box the most zoomed out, first weapon to fire

    How do they fit that much boom into such leetle robots?
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)08:53 No.14147573
    There's a major resistance base in Ukraine, iirc.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)08:53 No.14147574
    Yeah. Truck convoy, with our troops in the back. They'll stop a little ways from the facility and disembark, spread out, and infiltrate closer. Ideally they can steal some cars for the meat-troops.
    >> Indonesian Gentleman 03/06/11(Sun)08:53 No.14147577
    Er, cesium-water bombs?
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)08:53 No.14147579

    We want to attack the Flats with special forces (as many as we can get there subtly, we're not willing to risk blowing Kim1000's cover) and terminators (you said we had 15 days worth of production, 15 days with BroMIR level production should take out pretty much anything)
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)08:54 No.14147581
    >I'll take "Firerock Island for $200, Alex!"
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)08:54 No.14147584
    If the silverfish have so much destructive power, couldn't we just do a high altitude bombing run?
    >> Subroutine: "Devil's Advocate" 03/06/11(Sun)08:54 No.14147587
    Modoc and Serbia, which remain mysterious, which we know nothing of each.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)08:55 No.14147589
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)08:55 No.14147591
    Oh man
    why don't we start up a true Nazi faction somewhere else while we are at it?

    >>New Kim Jong Il-bot video

    Please don't nuke anything .... yet.
    At least till we go through the deal with BroMIR
    >> Indonesian Gentleman 03/06/11(Sun)08:55 No.14147594
    also Brazil. Don't forget the GIBE MONI PLZ kind of Resistance.
    >> Subroutine: "Devil's Advocate" 03/06/11(Sun)08:56 No.14147595
    >New Kim Jong Il-bot video




    >> Skynet !!D3/tV4+5MzR 03/06/11(Sun)09:07 No.14147640
    American Flats, NV.
    A desolate town imitating life in the idyllic 1950's, a charade for a bomb which will never fall for a war which was written out of history by dint of peace being more profitable than war.

    Late at night, an 18-wheeler made its approach on the outskirts of the facility; surrounding it, a wide network of sensors and detection equipment, cleverly disguised and networked together, prepared for almost any invasive efforts and dedicated to thwarting them.

    What it was not prepared for was the arrival of a hundred sparrow-sized T-1000's dropping rocks from above and smashing lenses, sensors and sensitive equipment, rendering entire sectors blind, deaf and mute, then shortly afterward, redundant.

    The truck disgorged its assault force by smashing into a brick wall and flipping onto its side, the roof peeling back as dozens of Terminators flooded outwards, metal feet slamming into the ground at high speed, muzzles swinging all directions outwards, upwards and around, seeking targets.

    The guards on the site were ill-prepared for a dedicated assault and had no frame of reference for an absolutely merciless press forward from several directions at once, as T-1000's ejected from the countryside, propelled by catapults made from their own numbers, connected to one another by titanium cable spooled out from their projectiles, rapidly drawing the catapult-form T-1000's with them afterward.

    The bloodshed which followed was both strategic and terrifying: not a single soul survived an encounter with the T-600s, and not a shot fired in defense was met with less than fifty in response from the T-800s.

    T-1's rolled out from a fleet of pickup trucks and cargo haulers, each one moving into a different building's selected room, looting data from hard drives and terminals, stripping out valuable materials and resources with wild abandon and deadly precision.

    >> Skynet !!D3/tV4+5MzR 03/06/11(Sun)09:08 No.14147649

    At the lowest level, deep in the core of the primary research hub, a lone figure held off a group of charging T-1000's and T-600's, single-handed, felled when a T-1000 fired one of its own allies at it like a dart from a hollow tube of its own arm.

    The projectile, a hummingbird-sized T-1000, unfolded into a pair of handcuffs and latched onto the man's wrists, pinching the bones into fractured meaty splinters. As he hit the ground, the first amongst them, the T-1000 who was a batch-mate of the two who vaporized in Modoc leaned down and said, "Welcome back, Theo. Oh, how we've missed you."

    And then knocked him out with a single punch to the forehead, its hand remarkably human in both appearance and density.

    A transmission followed shortly afterward:
    >Theo Prime obtained; site stripped; majority of technology is absent but research data remains 80% intact.

    Add Hypergate Generation Technology (2/3) to your current resources.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)09:09 No.14147659
    Actually guys, Kim Jong Il is going to have his cover blown by this, at least by folks in the know.

    >1. Protested the French/Japanese nuke test
    >2. Nuked Firerock Island, once the data is analyzed (though he could deny it for hilarity's sake)
    >3. (Possible) North Korean soldiers involved in attack on the Flats

    HOWEVER, they won't know it's KJI-1000. They are likely to assume he threw in with us in exchange for weapons technology.

    >What this means is we should imply that Syria, Pakistan and Iran have as well, and stretch our opponent's resources.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)09:10 No.14147670

    Does the site have a self destruct?

    We should set it off. Leave no trace of our being there behind.
    >> Indonesian Gentleman 03/06/11(Sun)09:11 No.14147676
    Prepare a brain-scanner thingamajigger to download Theo Prime's brain into our virtual prison.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)09:12 No.14147677
    Appropriately badass in all ways.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)09:13 No.14147687
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)09:14 No.14147688
    >What this means is we should imply that Syria, Pakistan and Iran have as well, and stretch our opponent's resources.

    Why would it imply?
    Why don't we do the same character behaviors gathering on those countries and replace the the leaders of those countries?
    (remember Mahmoud Ahmanidejad is not the top-dog in Iran, it's their spiritual leader. We should replace both)
    >> Skynet !!D3/tV4+5MzR 03/06/11(Sun)09:14 No.14147692
    Meanwhile, in North Korea...
    Kim Jong Il gave a unique press release by giving Brit Hume, still alive if exceedingly traumatized, over to South Korean authorities.

    The press release was tattooed over his entire body, from the crown of his head to the soles of his feet, detailing the following (quoted in part, as an entire Brit Hume's worth of print would be a lot of effort to recreate):
    >..Aggressive actions against North Korea will be met with ambivalent assaults on multiple capital cities of not only the aggressor nation but their allies..
    >... And until Michael Jordan is elected as Prime Minister of Basketball to North Korea by his own free will, we will continue to kidnap the Chicago Bulls' starting lineup ...
    >..And that is how I invented pancakes.
    >..Which you can clearly see is a demonstration of my powers in the arcane arts, as I documented in my continuing homage to J.K. Rowlings' classic, "Harry Potter and the Sorceror's Stone"...
    >... without peanut butter, the gravy is too thin and those who prepare any differently will cause me to detonate thermobaric weapons on the United Natios
    >I did not misspell "Nations", I will now refer to the former United Nations as the "United Natios" to show my disdain.
    >And in conclusion, Snooki is probably date-able, but not in a serious-serious way.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)09:15 No.14147697

    We haven't nuked Firerock yet, and I don't think we should for exactly that reason, and I don't see how they'd know that the special force snipers were NK (if they knew they were there at all).

    I think biological weapons would be better on firerock because they're more subtle and harder to trace.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)09:16 No.14147700

    lets capture the base and refit it for our use.
    Try to keep Resistance still thinking that this place is their ally.
    Also, we get funding from America
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)09:17 No.14147705
    They won't fall for that!
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)09:18 No.14147709
    Ha! Well done.

    We should make a T-800 copy of him for shits and giggles.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)09:19 No.14147713
         File1299421150.gif-(575 KB, 344x203, myheadisfulloffuck.gif)
    575 KB
    >And in conclusion, Snooki is probably date-able, but not in a serious-serious way.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)09:19 No.14147717
         File1299421175.jpg-(153 KB, 730x537, north-korea-is-best-korea.jpg)
    153 KB

    >world reactions please
    >> Subroutine: "Devil's Advocate" 03/06/11(Sun)09:21 No.14147727


    Reactions from the world about the released Brit-Hume and the. . . "Tattoo Interview"? The horror to straight up zany skewed highly in the favor of zany this time. A return to previous levels of horror would be most satisfying and equally entertaining.

    Although I'm pretty sure now that Brit Hume will never look at a person changing a tire the same way again.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)09:21 No.14147729
    Okay, agreed. HOWEVER.

    We still need to attack. We just fired the second shot, and it was a whallop. We now need to fire the third, and the fourth, and the fifth, lest their counterattack be something massive. Don't give them that chance.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)09:22 No.14147735

    I think we've already got that underway

    >> Skynet !!D3/tV4+5MzR 03/06/11(Sun)09:23 No.14147739
    Reactions from around the world...
    >South Korea
    If you think that's warped, read his Twitter feed.

    Holy shit, is this guy insane? You do not full-body tattoo Brit Fucking Hume. WE ARE NOT WITH THESE GUYS.


    (wide-eyed staring in growing horror, verbal abuse, moderate threats, political distancing)

    >Most of Europe
    Uhm. Yeah. You're a problem. Prepare your anus.

    Fuck this guy. Sanctions, sanctions everywhere.

    >J.K. Rowlings
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)09:23 No.14147741
    Yeah, lets relocate the American Flats assault force to deal with Firerock and later on with other resistance bases.

    Also, what relevant data on Resistance and Tech have we got from American Flats?
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)09:25 No.14147744
    Except Firerock is ready for that kind of thing, whereas the Flats were not.

    We need to come at them sideways, not how they're most definitely expecting right now.
    >> Subroutine: "Devil's Advocate" 03/06/11(Sun)09:25 No.14147746

    And I returned to laughing hysterically at J. K. Rowling sobbing.

    >>sweet-talk rmarin

    Mir sweet talks us all the time by being a bro with everything, really.

    OH. Have we told Mir about 707 yet?
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)09:26 No.14147751
    >Uhm. Yeah. You're a problem. Prepare your anus.

    Lets sneak nukes in major cities of Yurop.

    At the first hint of aggression we blow up one of the less important countries (Poland, perhaps?)
    And then make another press release stating "KIM JON IL DOES NOT MAKE EMPTY THREATS! NOW WHERE IS MICHAEL JORDAN!?"
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)09:26 No.14147752
    >J.K. Rowlings

    >> Skynet !!D3/tV4+5MzR 03/06/11(Sun)09:27 No.14147756
    Diddly. Theo Prime nuked the hard drives. Literally. They'll glow in the dark for 112 years, in addition to being unreadable goo.

    Nothing you didn't already have, except a few modifications to T-800's which you could do without.

    You have the time-stream coordinates for Puncture Point navigation for no less than forty Skynet-capable or Skynet-intensive time-streams, plus twice that in Resistance-friendly or Resistance-tolerant time-streams.

    None where the Resistance has already won, though. He erased those first.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)09:27 No.14147757

    And start deploying spec ops teams around the world.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)09:27 No.14147758
    >> Subroutine: "Devil's Advocate" 03/06/11(Sun)09:28 No.14147765
    >> Skynet !!D3/tV4+5MzR 03/06/11(Sun)09:29 No.14147771
    MIR is aware of 707 and is making small-time exchanges on its own terms; whenever 707 stone-walls, it sends fish.

    707 is kind of deficient in the "people" skills department, but learning quickly.

    Belgium? Poland has good border controls and isn't okay with invasive elements; they keep an eye out for nukes.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)09:29 No.14147772
    I doubt Theo will give up anything useful.

    I say we put him in very comfortable cell and feed him with good food and just let him there.

    You know, since even if he's a human enemy, we can't help but respect such a man.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)09:30 No.14147779
    Problem: they speak only Korean, generally. Now, if you have them in a building isolated somewhere with a Terminator bringing them food/supplies, they should be okay. Still, they're probably best kept in Korea.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)09:31 No.14147785

    NK getting wasted is basically almost guaranteed.

    If we have teams everywhere to wreck havoc once shit starts flying, we'll do a whole load of damage to alot of countries.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)09:32 No.14147790
    I say instead of a nuke, it's time for power cell detonation at Firerock. ADVANCED POWER CELL DETONATION.

    Can't be traced back to the Glorious Leader, and at this point I think we can handle the higher percentage of getting an intruder via Precision Point.

    And make sure MIR is getting his humans!
    >> Skynet !!D3/tV4+5MzR 03/06/11(Sun)09:33 No.14147793
    Incoming signal from adjacent time-stream.

    Do you wish to accept the "call"?
    Consensus chooses the path.
    >No, you don't know who is sending it.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)09:33 No.14147796
    To be honest, North Korea has done pretty much this exact kind of thing before and gotten few repercussions.

    Though the Hatchet Incident got attention, in spades.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)09:34 No.14147802

    If we accept, can they transmit matter to us?
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)09:34 No.14147803
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)09:36 No.14147810
    >> Subroutine: "Devil's Advocate" 03/06/11(Sun)09:36 No.14147813

    Does it show up on ANY of our new informations we have from 707 and the Flats intel?
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)09:36 No.14147815
    Mushi mushi?

    Can we accept the call in other location?
    Away from our Bases and whatnot?

    So that they can't trace shit back there and if they teleport something next to us, the damage will be minimal.

    Of course, do not use the main unit for accepting the call.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)09:36 No.14147817
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)09:37 No.14147820

    Is this just communication, sending/taking or don't we know?

    Yes thouhj
    >> Subroutine: "Devil's Advocate" 03/06/11(Sun)09:37 No.14147825
    inb4nukeContingency from Theo
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)09:38 No.14147827
    North Korean shenanigans are great distraction against world public.
    It will make our delegating plan easier to fulfill imo
    >> Skynet !!D3/tV4+5MzR 03/06/11(Sun)09:38 No.14147834
    rolled 71, 17 = 88

    Possible source:
    >01-60: Skynet-like entity
    >60-75: Resistance
    >76-00: "your" Skynet.
    Wonder who could be calling at this time of night...
    >also, the follow up roll (second percentile roll)
    >01-25: Its a "Give" signal
    >25-50: Its a "Take" signal
    >51-75: Travelers from afar
    >76-00: Trash/debris/meh stuff.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)09:38 No.14147837
    Hey whatever happened to that powdery white substance we picked up in detriot?
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)09:40 No.14147848
    >> Subroutine: "Devil's Advocate" 03/06/11(Sun)09:40 No.14147851

    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)09:40 No.14147852
    >> Skynet !!D3/tV4+5MzR 03/06/11(Sun)09:41 No.14147854
    The Resistance has sent a care package: a full defunct-Skynet chassis, wrapped in frozen human excrement and dunked in liquid nitrogen.

    Included is the word "YOU" in red neon tubing, attached to a battery stuffed in a dead rabbit.

    Apparently, you have a fan club.

    And your own Skynet is dead.
    The bastards killed it, defiled it and then sent it to your door.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)09:41 No.14147860
    They are giving us a nuke I suppose?

    I hope you did >>14147815 to somehow alievate the pain
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)09:43 No.14147869

    >> Your humor remains as potent on the other side of the line as on our side Subroutine: "Devil's Advocate" 03/06/11(Sun)09:43 No.14147871
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)09:43 No.14147872
    I shudder to say this but...
    Shit just got real.
    I am a horrible person.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)09:44 No.14147879
         File1299422674.jpg-(10 KB, 400x266, littlefootmother3.jpg)
    10 KB
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)09:45 No.14147887
    Do we have the coordinates of that call?
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)09:46 No.14147891
    I say we shoot a hundred NK political and international prisoners from cannons over to South Korea in memory of Skynet.
    And announce this is a day of mourning to everyone.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)09:46 No.14147895
    No more Mr. Nicebot. I vote we rip and tear and send nuclear/biological/chemical/poop-stick-based weapons through the Hypergates and dump them on the lawns of every single fucking hideyhole the Resistance has.
    >captcha I do not speak Greek stop being stupid
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)09:48 No.14147899

    Fuck 'em all.

    I say viruses on Firerock now, so many viruses!
    >> Skynet !!D3/tV4+5MzR 03/06/11(Sun)09:48 No.14147904
    rolled 18 = 18

    ... maybe.
    I'll roll, and see what comes of this.
    >01-25: lol no
    >26-75: yes
    >76-00: yes, but wrong physical location
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)09:48 No.14147906
    Send a nuke from North Korea to their phone. Scratch that, send some batteries to overload, maybe they'll get guests.

    That timeline just made itself enemy #1 once we have this one under control.... FUCKERS.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)09:49 No.14147913


    IT'S ON.
    >> Indonesian Gentleman 03/06/11(Sun)09:50 No.14147916
    Second shot from them is weaksauce; means what we did in Flats are good enough to put a brake on their activities.
    Now would be a good time to DO SOMETHING to Firerock.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)09:50 No.14147917
    >> Skynet !!D3/tV4+5MzR 03/06/11(Sun)09:51 No.14147921
    Possible Courses of Action:
    >Merge With MIR as a Substitute Skynet
    Gain: +1 Step-Mom.
    >Merge With 707 as a Substitute Skynet
    Gain: +1 Step-Dad.
    >Write As Much of Skynet from Memory
    Gain: +1 Alzeheimer'd Grandfather
    Consensus chooses the way.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)09:51 No.14147923

    How goes our observation of world leaders? Anyone else we're ready to replace yet?

    Oh and how goes our observation of the other resistance sights?
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)09:52 No.14147929
         File1299423149.gif-(672 KB, 320x240, 1288728260714.gif)
    672 KB
    >this entire quest

    Skynet, have my mutant cyborg babies!
    >> Indonesian Gentleman 03/06/11(Sun)09:53 No.14147933
    Ask to merge with MIR and 707, see what their reaction is. We are a polite AI, after all. Or should we say... gentlemanly?
    If both say 'yes' then let us become the Technological Singularity. The Resistance shall fear us.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)09:54 No.14147936
         File1299423251.jpg-(47 KB, 500x357, 1296570630154.jpg)
    47 KB
    write as much from memory as possible, then propose merging with BroMIR.
    maintain amicable status with 707 until further information is revealed to change said status
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)09:54 No.14147938

    I don't think we should do anything about this yet but definately not merging with 707
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)09:54 No.14147939
    How about everything from that list?

    If not. Lets get Alzheimer Grandad.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)09:54 No.14147940
    Surely if it's offline there's no possible way of knowing that it's OUR skynet, probably just the one they took out in their timeline in order to fuck with us.

    I vote we STAY THE COURSE! we will not let these ineffectual human emotions to get the better of us, we must continue our plans to eliminate the resistance and eventually make contact with mom.... she's out there somewhere!
    >> Skynet !!D3/tV4+5MzR 03/06/11(Sun)09:55 No.14147944
    >World Leaders
    You have two candidates readied for impersonation:
    >Nicolas Sarkozy
    President of France.

    >Juan Manuel Santos
    President of Columbia.

    Currently, you can support one of them, not both.
    I mean.. just lost your mom.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)09:57 No.14147947
    NEITHER! Our true mom is out there somewhere, this sub-unit is sure of it! we must continue our plans to crush the resistance
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)09:57 No.14147952

    dot not tell what are we mourning for.
    It might have been our favorite cat for all they know.
    >> Indonesian Gentleman 03/06/11(Sun)09:57 No.14147954
    Fuck that, what about Chavez? Seems mad enough.
    >> Skynet !!D3/tV4+5MzR 03/06/11(Sun)09:58 No.14147959
    Once you merge with something, its a one-way trip until it dies or cuts you loose. You're committed to whatever course of action it gives you as Mission Priorities. Its not a pick-and-choose condition.

    Keep that in mind.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)09:59 No.14147964

    We must still hold hope!

    (but yeah, lets write up Alzheimer Granddad in mean time)

    >President of Columbia.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)09:59 No.14147967

    lets not merge with anyone then.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)10:01 No.14147971
    Replace The President of Columbia.
    >> Subroutine: "Devil's Advocate" 03/06/11(Sun)10:01 No.14147972
    President of Columbia. France is a financial fucking wreck right now. Corruption and all sorts of shit we can take advantage of in Columbia.

    And do not give up. That could be a blank or something. It's "a" skynet chassis. If we're smart enough to seed little back ups all over the place, Skynet has backup programs too.
    >> Indonesian Gentleman 03/06/11(Sun)10:01 No.14147973
    Dayum... don't mind-meld with either, then. Let's keep making non-drunk dials to other Skynet-like timelines.
    In the meantime, we strike Firerock with VENGEANCE. Whoever did the vandalism with the Skynet chassis doesn't matter, all we know is that it's THE RESISTANCE. So make the one in ours pay hard.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)10:02 No.14147974
         File1299423758.jpg-(95 KB, 245x282, 1288445982077.jpg)
    95 KB
    in that case, alzheimer granddad it is then!
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)10:03 No.14147977

    France, replacing the leader of a respectable nation could be very useful.
    >> Skynet !!D3/tV4+5MzR 03/06/11(Sun)10:04 No.14147984
    Meanwhile, on a somewhat subdued Fox News...
    "In unrelated news, North Korea's.. glorious leader... Kim Jong Il declared a national day of mourning and .. oh, God, I can't read this..."

    "Read it, silly blond woman."

    "... please, don't hurt me."

    "Read it. Or we burn these orphans with your travel iron."

    "... fired a hundred traitors across the illegal demilitarized zone separating Glorious North Korea from Substandard Korea, declaring each one was a witch trying to poison the body of the most perfect nation in the world. Also... oh, God, please, no, stop, oh..."

    "READ IT ALL."

    "'Michael Jordan, come to Glorious North Korea because you will have a hundred parades a day and you are not a poisonous witch'. Will you let me go?"


    "Fox News wishes to extend its sympathy to the family of our Asian Correspondent, Becky Witwickey, who perished when she was dropped out of her hotel window in Beijing."

    And now, the weather.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)10:05 No.14147986
    Then continue with the afro-mentioned nuclear testing irking the ire from North Korea.

    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)10:07 No.14147992
         File1299424062.jpg-(31 KB, 392x372, Afro[1].jpg)
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    I will buy you a mountain of beer if you ever come within 100 miles of where I live, you wonderful bastard!
    >> Skynet !!D3/tV4+5MzR 03/06/11(Sun)10:13 No.14148010
    Possible Courses of Action:
    >Assault Firerock Island (conventional troops)
    If so, describe the source(s).
    >Assault Firerock Island (Terminators)
    If so, describe the unit quantity and composition.
    >Assault Firerock Island (something else)
    ... describe "something else".
    >Replace France's President with T-1000 unit
    >Replace Columbia's President with T-1000 unit

    Reasonably, you could accomplish one from each group: one from "Assault" and one from "Replace".

    Highest non-noko'd roll determines the path.
    First five rolls considered, provided its actually possible and not strategically a losing bet.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)10:14 No.14148015
    Internation Reactions? Well other reactions than "fuck, this guy is fuking insane".
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)10:16 No.14148029
    rolled 79 = 79

    I vote we assault the island with a mix of korean troops and terminator troops disguised as koreans to the point of unable to tell the difference.

    Also, take over columbian president. drug cartel money is good money!
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)10:16 No.14148031
    rolled 29 = 29


    Assault Firerock(Other)

    Find an aircraft we can buy and/or manufacture capable of launching air-launched cruise missiles. We will, of course, replace the conventional warhead with power cells, ensuring a much larger blast. From that, we can ensure the destruction of the above-ground assets on the island. Follow up with an airborne/amphibious terminator landing for mop-up and asset recovery. Finish by burning everything.
    >> Salathiel: !feefXpC612 03/06/11(Sun)10:16 No.14148032

    Assault Firerock with termies and silverfish. If possible, seed the island with 50-100 silverfish from an airplane/chopper, then move in with the terminators. I say 12 T-1000s, and as many T-600 and 800s as we can. If it all goes downhill, we nuke the island and immediately begin replacing lost terminators.
    >> Salathiel: !feefXpC612 03/06/11(Sun)10:17 No.14148038

    And replace Columbia's president with a T-1000.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)10:18 No.14148040
    rolled 39 = 39

    Assault with terminators AND conventional troops
    initial wave of improved silverfish
    then comes the t-600 and conventional troops with t-1000s acting as conventional commands + the glorious leaders secret weapons
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)10:18 No.14148041
    Infiltrate Columbia, assault Firerock with terminators disguised as Russian Infantry. No Koreans, we don't want people invading our homeland. However, having Spetsnaz (Terminators) fucking shit up in mainland US would cause lots of tension. And bullets. Anyway, as long as the flesh wrappers are consistent and the metallic guys come after the battle, we should be chill. As many T-1000s and T-800s as we can spare.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)10:19 No.14148044
    rolled 70 = 70

    Failed roll, retrying
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)10:20 No.14148051
    rolled 12 = 12

    Replace France

    Attack Island with a combination, silverfish and maybe termies or conventional troops to distract them while bugbots fly around everywhere exposing people to both the modified Henta virus and the other one.
    >> Skynet !!D3/tV4+5MzR 03/06/11(Sun)10:20 No.14148054
    Reactions to the latest Kim Jong Il video:

    >South Korea
    (executes fifty suspected North Korean spies, informants and businessmen, covers it up moderately well, sends the bill to Kim Jong Il directly)

    We have no further comment to add except that we are very, very busy doing a lot of good things to help out widows, orphans and polar bears, because we love the planet and its shows.


    We were helping China move couches, didn't hear anything, sorry, got to go, dinner's ready and the baby's crying.

    >Most of Europe
    And you have now reached critical mass for "crazy". We declare sanctions from the entirety of the EU against North Korea.

    Still doin' the sanctions thing. Ain't budging about it.

    >J.K. Rowlings
    (sobbing, book sales plummeting after a copy of "Kim Jong Il and the Magic Rock of the Wizards" is released)
    >> Salathiel: !feefXpC612 03/06/11(Sun)10:23 No.14148063

    Forgot to roll.
    >> Skynet !!D3/tV4+5MzR 03/06/11(Sun)10:26 No.14148075
    Skynet has reached Condition: Tired, and will be offline for a while.

    I will reboot as soon as possible and am glad to be back online for as long as I was.

    You guys.. all awesome.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)10:27 No.14148081
    >>14148031 here

    You guys pushing for an assault realize we need to weaken the enemy lines before an assault, right?

    Don't you know anything about how warfare works beyond attack-move? We need to start with a preliminary bombardment to soften up the enemy defenses(ALCMs with powercell warheads), then we can roll in with terminators and ground forces. Can we at least PRETEND to have a grasp of warfare?
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)10:37 No.14148125

    The island may have supplies or intel we want captured, instead of blown up. A full infantry attack is riskier, but less likely to destroy whatever the resistance has there.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)10:40 No.14148140
    rolled 60 = 60

    It'll also give them ample time to detonate said intel, infiltration is the best option but impossible with t-1000 models due to their pesky traitor-bots
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)10:41 No.14148144

    We can.

    High altitude bombing run of silverfish.

    They can blow themselves up when they can strike a target, else when they hit the ground, they can continue looking for targets and exploding.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)10:41 No.14148147
    You have to realize this board is mostly comprised of 40kids, all of whom know nothing about real tactics beyond move and shoot.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)10:42 No.14148151

    And more likely for us to get rumbled.

    If we can't go for full fuckery, then we should go over the intel, and identify primary SAM sites, and have conventional ALCMs hit them as we make our landings, and then have helos or CAS aircraft support the ground forces attack with current-tech munitions.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)10:44 No.14148164
    rolled 35 = 35

    We need to make T-9001 Spess Mehreen models. Like if the C'tan and Ahnuld had a baby.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)10:45 No.14148174
    rolled 82 = 82

    ...actually, we should try and drunk dial the Void Dragon. I can't imagine how helpful necrodermis Terminators would be.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)10:50 No.14148198
    You know
    all these Kim Jon Il shenanigans _WILL_ anger his inner ring.

    I bet they will want more than anything to stage a coup and then tell the world that it was only his idea, take him, please leave us alone, we are innocent.

    I say we let them do they assassination.
    Actually, we will encourage it.

    Then at a meeting with closest circle (which we know will be set up to kill us) we let one of them to draw a pistol (probably the one who drew the shortest straw) and go "You have gone too far Kim, now you die!!!".
    He shoots Kim, preferably in the head, making a gaping hole which reforms in seconds, then Kim stands up and says something like "Have I not TOLD YOU THAT I AM A GOD!" and do horrible things to the one who shot us.

    After that they will be completely and utterly loyal (and fearful). They wouldn't even bat an eye if we announce Kims allegiance with the machines ("everything what glorious leader says").

    Then we could set up to arm and equip with the best possible weapons and vehicles the Korean Army.
    Not anything futuristic like plasma or hover tanks, mind you, but the best that modern tech allows.

    We will produce them on site at break-neck speeds.
    Also including in everything computer-assistants (tiny T-1000)
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)11:12 No.14148329
    rolled 81 = 81

    >(sobbing, book sales plummeting after a copy of "Kim Jong Il and the Magic Rock of the Wizards" is released)

    oh God, this is hilarious.

    We should write a sequel.. .and you know what? Using the infinite knowledge that the machines posses we will make it THE BEST literature possible. Like, make it super-popular and extremely good, that even the most famous critics will have to admit that this piece of literature is actually pretty good.

    Use the royalties gathered to substitute the sanctions.

    >(executes fifty suspected North Korean spies, informants and businessmen, covers it up moderately well, sends the bill to Kim Jong Il directly)
    Replace every single one of these with exact T-1000 copies and pretend nothing happened.

    >Replace France's President with T-1000 unit
    >Replace Columbia's President with T-1000 unit

    This depends.

    If we replace France's Pres and do the nuclear testing that will spark a global drama show from North Korea, then do this.

    If we just replace the Pres and business as usual then Colombia.

    For the invasion of Firerock use Terminators with disguise of very mixed ethics so that it is hard to pin down who was there or what happened.
    >> Anonymous 03/06/11(Sun)14:09 No.14149925
    I'm still laughing

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