Posting mode: Reply
Password(Password used for file deletion)
  • Supported file types are: GIF, JPG, PNG
  • Maximum file size allowed is 3072 KB.
  • Images greater than 250x250 pixels will be thumbnailed.
  • Read the rules and FAQ before posting.
  • ????????? - ??

  • File : 1272295622.jpg-(50 KB, 366x337, Doctor.jpg)
    50 KB ITT: Insanely awesome characters you've pulled off ViolenceIsAPerformanceArt 04/26/10(Mon)11:27 No.9441117  
    I've always wanted to make a thread like this, and well, the character i've been playing deserves it.

    V'wllss Nsctnm started out as a joke, and anyone who figures out the pun in his name, my god am i sorry. He's in a currently developing system i've managed to get in the Alpha tests for called Phase Shift, a futuristic Magic Meets Science game. He's also responsible for a few dozen policies being written and two classes being redone from the bottom up. He was a Byakkarian Soldier, Byaks being a race of radioactive cockroach people resulting from a previous race's nuclear holocaust, and designed to be insanely good with improvised weapons. And as such, his main weapon was the Chair Leg of Truth, broken off a bar stool in a previous fight, which he believed 1. Was a sacred weapon and 2. Spoke to him. The DM looked sidelong at me as I explained it, but he knows my style of characters and okayed it.

    The party priest, however, had a sense of humor. When he heard Vwllss, or Willis as he's come to be called at the table (and no, nobody's ever quite sure what he's talking about), refer to his weapon as sacred, he had a glance at it, and blessed it. He rolled a natural twenty. The weapon now devoured souls, and gained power from it. So, every time i killed someone with this normally quite pitiful weapon, it would gain damage. Needless to say, this got out of hand quite quickly. The party went out of their way to stun or incapacitate their enemies and I just finished them off, causing this weapon to, within the first campaign, be more deadly than the particle canon our scientist made. Recall, if you will, this is a garden variety, at least in appearance, chair leg doing this damage. This little debacle made Willis into a cause celebre in the group.
    >> ViolenceIsAPerformanceArt 04/26/10(Mon)11:33 No.9441192
    Perhaps before I go on i should explain a bit more about Byaks. Byaks are essentially nature's survivalists. They are designed to take all sorts of environmental hazards without any problems. Extreme heat or cold barely bothers them. The grow up around and eat radioactive materials. They can survive several minutes in the vacuum of space. They're tough motherfuckers. And most of them are peace-loving and gentle, for reasons i'll expand upon later.

    Except for the army. Their army is the most insanely violent group of creatures in the universe. Why? Because while they're very good against physical environmental hazards they are immensely prone to psychic radiation. Which means areas with high emotional concentration REALLY get to them. And they can get addicted to emotions they are exposed to. Their warriors are constantly around the emotions of battlefields, which are some of the strongest there are. Few people come out of the trenches even mildly sane. Willis used to be a Byakkarian soldier until his dishonorable discharge for going batshit insane and charging an enemy encampment on his own against the orders of his commanders. He also killed every last fucker in that encampment, but... well, he was clearly not fit for duty so he was expelled. This is backstory, but it helps to understand where i'm coming from here.
    >> Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)11:34 No.9441214
         File1272296095.jpg-(458 KB, 1000x707, 1258212548206.jpg)
    458 KB
    >> Indonesian Gentleman 04/26/10(Mon)11:36 No.9441234
    So, mad veteran with posessed everyday object?
    >> Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)11:36 No.9441236
    I made a joke character who had ridiculously high strength and very low intelligence. I played him as the well meaning "slow" person. His favored attack was grapple (and if you've ever been in a fight with a retard, the last thing you want to do is let them get a grip).

    So we're fighting the BBEG on top of his fuckhuge tower, and I fail my saving roll against the windstorm he's conjured up. As I go flying by, I announce that I attempt to grapple the BBEG.

    DM says that the strength requirement is too high. I show him my character sheet, and it's enough. His face was priceless. He made me roll for the grapple.

    I passed.

    He grabbed hold of the BBEG with all his tard-enhanced strength and pulled him along for a fatal trip to the ground.
    >> ViolenceIsAPerformanceArt 04/26/10(Mon)11:36 No.9441237
    Willis became the heart and soul of Crazy Awesome within the group. We just made up insane shit for him to do because we could. My favorite of these was the creation of Orbital Drop Armor. We decided to make Willis some armor that could not only survive going through space but in fact take the entire force of being dropped from low orbit onto the planet's surface and then be used for combat. We dropped me onto an enemy facility after we'd stuck a tracker onto the BBEG as he escaped. I rolled two twenties and all successes on my aiming to hit the facility. I landed smack-dab on the BBEG after passing through two floors of concrete. And killed him. The DM had a four hour session planned. We finished it in ten minutes, before the others even got off the ship.
    >> Indonesian Gentleman 04/26/10(Mon)11:39 No.9441269
    Medieval Forrest Gump?
    >> Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)11:41 No.9441284
         File1272296490.jpg-(40 KB, 400x581, chair_leg.jpg)
    40 KB
    Chair leg of truth + Gigantic Roach = win
    >> Rape-Chan !!DhEZOUaepXX 04/26/10(Mon)11:41 No.9441288
    An ex-paladin lucha libre wrestler who specialized in headbutts and had a grossly oversized helmet for just that, covered in antlers, swords, cactus, cheese graters, etc...
    >> ViolenceIsAPerformanceArt 04/26/10(Mon)11:43 No.9441305
    After repeated exposure to the undead, later on in that campaign, we all came down with a case of the phoenix virus, which is the in-world explanation for undeadosity. One of your stats, ATT, or Attunement, determines which type of undead you'll become. I found Willis was in the perfect range to become a lycanthrope, and there was a chart after that with a d100 chart dictating the various types of creatures you could end up were-ing to. One of those entries was "Legendary Monsters". I hired a necromancer to expand the 1% range on this to about 15%, and died. I succeeded, on my third death, thanks to our Time-Mage. I became a Were-Radiation Dragon. I could now breathe radiation as a Spellish ability. I could expend 2 MP to sterilize people with this, as well. Which I did. Quite frequently.
    >> Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)11:45 No.9441337
    A WFRP dwarf who lost his only fate point at the first game.

    He had a small keg of dwarven beer which he used after big battle to celebrate his victory. So after big battles, his friends found him stone drunk and passed out in the middle of slain ennemies and then drag him back to a local tavern.

    This led him to believe his Keg had teleportation powers.
    >> Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)11:45 No.9441338
         File1272296745.jpg-(25 KB, 480x360, santo1.jpg)
    25 KB
    >I passed.

    >He grabbed hold of the BBEG with all his tard-enhanced strength and pulled him along for a fatal trip to the ground.
    >> Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)11:47 No.9441358
    The first name is "Vowelless", but I don't get the last?
    >> ViolenceIsAPerformanceArt 04/26/10(Mon)11:48 No.9441361
    After the Orbital Drop stunt, it was ruled we weren't allowed to ever do that again. So, naturally, we found a way around that. We built some gauntlets that stored forced put against the palms and released it through the knuckles. Our GM believed I'd be using it to catch enemy attacks and thus make my later attacks more powerful. I threw myself out of our ship. Landed on my hands, without so much as disturbing the soil. And then stood up, punched down a building with one hand and vaporized a guard with the other. There's not another word for it really, he just kind of FOOM'd out of existence as that much force hit him right in the face. Oh, wait, I did forget to explain the unarmed thing, didn't i? Oh yes.
    >> ViolenceIsAPerformanceArt 04/26/10(Mon)11:48 No.9441367

    Vowelless Insectname.
    >> Indonesian Gentleman 04/26/10(Mon)11:48 No.9441369
    >> ViolenceIsAPerformanceArt 04/26/10(Mon)11:53 No.9441413
    Several times with this character, the GM basically wrote out abilities i'd created because I seriously unbalanced the group. I was soloing main bosses in two/three turns. So, he made me give up the chair leg of truth after it was doing a few hundred damage per attack. So, I multiclassed to Assassin, and took up unarmed combat.

    You see, the assassin's class ability allows you to make two full actions per turn, which means 2 full attacks, or 2 moves and 2 attacks, or whatever you want to do with your 2 turns in one. You could also buy a third and fourth action with more Class Points (VERY HARD TO COME BY). I got as high as i could be allowed to, and began taking Ambi and Multidexterity skills and began having about 4 limbs i was attacking with (with full unarmed damage, i might add) with each of these actions. At the end, i believe the GM said I was doing enough damage every turn to destroy a small spaceship. With my bare hands and feet. In a single turn. Willis was forcibly retired shortly thereafter.
    >> Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)11:59 No.9441493

    everyone was lolling exept the GM
    >> ViolenceIsAPerformanceArt 04/26/10(Mon)12:02 No.9441533
    But It wasn't all about Willis. There's also his support. Willis was assisted in battle by Rosencrantz and Guildenstern. These two used to be assassins. Then, Willis killed them, and in a fit of amusement, and a desire to get some flanking bonuses, our scientists took their corpses and wired them up with motors and muscles, and gave them a basic tactical AI that could obey orders and fight effectively. They were the first of the Meat Puppets. The names are, of course, because Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are dead. I'm sorry, i'm an incorrigable punster. The two fought alongside our team bravely for most of a long campaign, with willis treating them like they were real people. Willis, again, was severely schizophrenic and did this a lot. Later on, Guildenstern was felled on the battlefield as we raided an enemy base while hired by the local branch of the Galactic Defense Force or whatever they were called. Big army thing. The GM, after seeing some fantastic roleplaying of me mourning the loss and turning to our foes in anger, granted me bonuses on the attack rolls for that combat to avenge the death of Guildenstern. Who, let me remind you, is a mechanically re-animated corpse of a man who tried to kill us, and merely needed a few hours in a repair shop to be functional again. Guildenstern was later buried, at Willis's insistence, with full military honors.
    >> Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)12:11 No.9441664
    sounds you stole the spotlight from the rest of your group leaving nothing for them to do. retirement was a good call
    >> ViolenceIsAPerformanceArt 04/26/10(Mon)12:12 No.9441683
    Phase Shift is an insanely fun system, designed to let your inner powergamer come out and trash things. Which is why people like me are alpha-testing the game. Because we break this game like a wild stallion. We've been finding every little loophole and exploiting the hell out of it. Like my Transference based Psychic who had a second, cooperative and helpful personality in his head who he transferred into the skulls of difficult opponents, where he took over, field stripped their weapon, threw away any bladed weapons, carefully removed their armor, and then was transferred back, where the opponent had a brief moment to stare at us in utter horror before he was turned into rubble.
    >> ViolenceIsAPerformanceArt 04/26/10(Mon)12:14 No.9441723

    Precisely the reason I retired him. The rest of our group is also crazy awesome, I could spend hours telling you about the various characters they've made and how much win has been produced. For a short while in there, however, Willis stole the show, so he was sent off to the pasture... and the Assassin and Soldier classes were utterly and entirely rewritten so nothing like him could ever exist again.
    >> ViolenceIsAPerformanceArt 04/26/10(Mon)12:18 No.9441772
    So, anyone else have some tales to share or shall i go dig up some more Tales from Phase Shift?
    >> Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)12:21 No.9441814
    I'd be willing to here more about this system, it sounds pretty crazy and potentially awesome.
    >> Ants 04/26/10(Mon)12:28 No.9441897

    I'm one of the players who was in Willis' party. A crafter. I was one of the two people to build all this shit. Let me just say we could have easily had a party full of Willises (we do, now) had we remembered to build crazy stuff like this for the whole party. Uuuunfortunately our GM has a habit of not getting to the crafting rolls for a while. Who can blame him, it must be boring as hell.

    Suffice to say that, while Willis' creator had all the amazing ideas behind him, anyone could have become this broken if we'd stumbled upon the right kind of gear for them. That's the point of Phase Shift. It's a pulpy powergamerfest.

    Now excuse me while I start a new post for the majesty of BEELORD, LORD OF BEES.
    >> ViolenceIsAPerformanceArt 04/26/10(Mon)12:28 No.9441899
    Lemme share a story from our GM about a previous party...

    "So, we had four characters in the party: a human Psychic, a sentient robot Scientist, an elven Chronomancer (time wizard, el oh el), and an elf soldier that specialized in bows. I'll call him Archer. Our scientist also had a dog, a Scottish terrier that had been heavily genetically, cybernetically, and mentally modified. He has robot wings, and could breathe fire, was almost as smart as a human and... thanks to SciBot... he could summon a forty-foot tall mech from a pocket universe.

    Yeah, this game has a very pulp, powergamey overtone, but that's actually how it's supposed to work, but I digress."
    >> ViolenceIsAPerformanceArt 04/26/10(Mon)12:29 No.9441909
    Our heroes were doing some mercenary work for the government on a city planet. They were hunting down a terrorist cell, and trying to get as much evidence as they could. They captured a spaceship from the enemy and there were high fives all around.

    But that night, Archer got to thinking that if he snuck into the ship to root around for evidence, he'd get a bonus. Let me say here that Archer was a very military character. Not built for sneaking. No skills in it whatsoever. And the captured ship was under the guard of the local military; Archer knew fully well if he got caught, he'd be arrested and held under suspicion of terrorist ties.

    So he tries it anyway. He doesn't even get into the ship before he gets slapped around and arrested.

    Chrono happened to be near enough to hear what was happening. When he saw Archer being hauled off, he followed. He waited until Archer had been slapped in a cell and then came out to ask what the hell was going on. Archer told him the story and Chrono was pissed.

    As the GM, I was laughing my ass off here. They were all gonna be arrested soon and Chrono knew it, so in order to spite me Chrono pulled out all the stops and drained all his magic to use his order's most dreaded technique: time travel.
    >> ViolenceIsAPerformanceArt 04/26/10(Mon)12:30 No.9441915
    In this setting, time travel is possible but it can have horrible consequences and Chrono knew it, but he felt he didn't really have a choice. He went back ten minutes and found Archer on his way to the hangar. He told Archer what was going on and managed to convince him not to go to the hangar after all. So, the two of them head back to the group together...

    Unfortunately, the normally astute and detail-oriented player behind Chrono forgot that the time-travel had brought him back ten minutes and this little act had taken a little over two.

    They arrive at the lounge, and then Future Chrono and Past Chrono see each other. Shock passes through all of the characters. Psychic is immediately suspicious, Past Chrono knows he can time travel but has no idea why he'd do it so he's suspicious too, SciBot wants to murder him (but he wanted to murder everyone all the time so there wasn't much of a change there).

    So, the incredibly intelligent scientific robot orders his dog to summon his mech. A forty foot high mech. In a building. An extraordinarily high one; they were a couple miles up. And the buildings of this city were extremely interconnected. When the building went down due to the sudden presence of a forty-foot tall mech in an eight-foot tall room, it brought down every other building in a square mile via the domino effect and all the connections between the various buildings.

    Right before everyone was gonna die, Chrono cheated me out of my victory by contacting the group's overseer, a powerful NPC chronomancer. He freezes time, screams at them for a while, then rewinds time for the area (like I said, very powerful) to before the dog destroyed the building. He screamed at them one last time and disappeared into the time stream.

    Chrono never time traveled again, but Archer learned nothing. Neither did SciBot.

    I never did get to kill those guys."
    >> Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)12:32 No.9441942
    I guess I should share some though, alright. Probably one of the craziest characters I've played out wasn't even my creation, I was just handed a character sheet for a shotgun toting Private Investigator (the entirety of the character concept I was handed was 'Paranoid PI'). And because I have an unhealthy love for stereotypes I played him as an alcoholic, chain smoking hard ass. In the first session alone he'd accidentally freed Dr. Kavorkian-meets-Krueger and been forced to negotiate a hostage release with him, which he reneged on... by manslaughtering the bastard with his piece of shit car in the middle of a farm field. He then somehow managed to keep the now wrecked car under control, drive it up to the barn where the psycho's lover/murder-buddy had a bunch of kids ripe for the slaughter and fill her prescription for a severe lead deficiency, taking a dramatic swig from his hip flask, and promptly collapsing.

    If anyone's still interested after that wall of text I can tell the tale of how he got himself and the rest of his group forcibly retired by escaping a police cordon in a stolen helicopter with only the whiskey to guide him, (as he rightfully had to bloody clue how to fly a helicopter).
    >> Ants 04/26/10(Mon)12:33 No.9441953
    Alright, BEELORD, LORD OF BEES. Where to begin? I suppose where we discovered him is as good a place as any.

    BEELORD, LORD OF BEES was not always a Beelord. Initially, he was an ordinary dog. We'd found him in the middle of the final session of the first campaign (this is the one where Guildensterd "died"), when our big, clumsy priest fell into a hole with him in it. We get him outta there, and the priest names the little guy Max.

    Now, as I've said, I'm a crafter. I'm our party's Mage. I specialize in Biomancy, which is the magic of life, and I have some more ranks in Numeromancy, which is the magic of physics. My best pal, DMine, who is a Scientist, is proficient in genmodding, and our priest who owns the dog is big and dumb and easy to fool.

    We had beautiful ideas.
    Crazy ideas.
    Beautiful, crazy ideas.
    >> ViolenceIsAPerformanceArt 04/26/10(Mon)12:37 No.9442010

    I'm fascinated. Do continue.
    >> Body Thetan !!j7BvgG0ZnNx 04/26/10(Mon)12:37 No.9442013
         File1272299866.jpg-(36 KB, 504x450, MOAR.jpg)
    36 KB
    >> Ants 04/26/10(Mon)12:38 No.9442020
    Our first step? Buy some bees and get in touch with our friendly neighborhood psychopath Willis. After extracting some of his radioactive insect DNA, and splicing it into the bees, we devised a Biomantic food source to make them grow, and fast. By the fourth generation, these things could support Max's weight if they made a concerted effort, and their sting was deadly enough to kill if just one of them got past DR.

    But what to do about obedience? Surely if these bees were set loose, the GM could just make them roll INT and decide to attack us instead, right? Wrong.

    While breeding the bees, we ran a DNA scan of the bees and Byakkarians and modified Max's vocal cords so he could speak in insect tongues. This means he can communicate with our Byaks (we had three of them in the party) AND with the bees. Things were starting to get interesting. . . .
    >> Ants 04/26/10(Mon)12:45 No.9442092
    At this point, our dog was no longer Max to anyone but the clueless Priest. Max had become BEELORD, LORD OF BEES, complete with a Biomantic Cape and Collar designed to raise his INTstat so he'd know not to attack us. The collar was made of bone, and the cape of spidersilk, two materials especially receptive to Biomancy, both of which granted some DR.

    But the final two problems remained. BEELORD, LORD OF BEES could speak to bees, and to his owners. He was smart enough not to order his bees to kill him. His bees were lethal weapons and could carry BEELORD, LORD OF BEES on their backs. But who's to say BEELORD, LORD OF BEES was fit to lead them? And what about having to carry around a beehive at all times?

    The geneticist and Biomancer, that's who, with a little help from Numeromancy. After making BEELORD, LORD OF BEES produce Queen pheremones to ensure the buzzards' loyalty, we turned his mouth into a Numeromantic portal to the beehive that activated upon incantation. Yes, you heard me right.

    Phase Shift: The system where you can create a hound with bees and when he barks he shoots bees at you.
    >> ViolenceIsAPerformanceArt 04/26/10(Mon)12:51 No.9442176
    More tales from the GM:
    "Dr. Chill was the Mekko (read, Robot) Scientist. If PS had D&D alignments He would have been Chaotic Evil. Or maybe True Neutral. It was hard to tell with him. Leaning more towards evil. Anyway, he started out with level 5 pyromania. He insisted. As well as, I believe, level 3 megalomania. He would wander off to steal, murder, and cause general havoc. Archer and him were Best Retard Friends. Chrono and Psychic were... well, probably not Good, but at least Lawful Neutral. Psychic may have been leaning to Chaotic Good, though. Dr. Chill had a TERRIBLE mind stat. Which means that Psychic could stop him in his tracks everytime Dr. Chill wanted to do something horrible. Dr. Chill and Archer did not like this much. Occasionally, they would attack Psychic or Chrono. This usually resulted in a quick tussle that Chill and Archer lost, badly. They simply couldn't stand up against Chrono and Psychic; they'd end up mindblasted and frozen. Dr. Chill decided to rectify this, and he snuck a lot of shit past me, slowly. A lot of antimagic weaponry. Some heavy-duty shit, too. They couldn't nullify Psychic's powers, but they could do a ton of damage at once. Since they were involved in some heavy shit, I never thought they'd turn on each other again; it seemed that they'd repented. So they were on their ship in deep space, passing by a forested moon. Their ship had been damaged somewhat. Not horribly."
    >> Ants 04/26/10(Mon)12:53 No.9442199
    Oh man, Willis, getting into Archer, now? Archer's been the source of hours of amusement for our party. Lemme give you another Archer story.

    At this point, it's been established Archer's a complete tool with a penchant for sneaking. Poorly. Correct? Correct.

    Lemme tell you about the time Archer managed to kill his entire party with a single arrow.

    Now, let me preface this story by saying that Chrono and Robo had made Archer some special arrows. One set stopped time for whatever it hit. The other unleashed a nuclear explosion a few blocks in diameter.

    As you can imagine, there were no safer hands to put these in than Archer's.
    >> ViolenceIsAPerformanceArt 04/26/10(Mon)12:54 No.9442212
    " But in the chaos, the players turned to one another, nodded... And Archer depowered Chrono with antimage arrows. A horribly bloody battle ensued. Eventually, everyone was dismembered and dead except for Psychic, who ran away when they drained his WP (will power, basically psychic's MP). He called Rank 4. Who showed up, screamed his head off, and turned back time for the dead bodies. He screamed some more and left in a huff. He forgot to fix the ship, though. The damage that Chill and Archer caused during the battle had totally fucked the ship up.
    Anyway. The ship crashed. That ends that story, though it begins the Tale of the Racist Australian Moon King.
    >> Ants 04/26/10(Mon)12:56 No.9442238
    So, our party's in the woods somewhere, and Archer, being the brain that he is, decides to go sneak around elsewhere. Why? Who can say. It's Archer, leave it at that. After the GM gets sick of him wandering around, he drops a werewolf on Archer, figuring he'll run away or call for help. Nope.

    Archer, forgetting he HAS A FUCKING BOW, runs up to the werewolf and STABS IT WITH A TIME ARROW. He gets extremely lucky and manages a successful hit, and succeeds the %chance timestop roll. So what does he do? Decides to get in a little target practice.

    Archer walks a few feet back from the wolf and picks out his nuclear arrow. A few feet. I shit you not. He's not even out of the blast range.

    And what should happen next but he critfails? The arrows shoots past the werewolf and lands dead center in the rest of the party. Kaboom.

    Now, luckily for Sir Dipshit the Archer, Chrono happened to be elsewhere, and comes running when he hears a nuclear explosion. He knows it's Archer, the twit, and comes back and goes back in time long enough to get his friends out.

    Did Archer learn his lesson? Can you guess?
    >> ViolenceIsAPerformanceArt 04/26/10(Mon)13:06 No.9442361
    That's all the stories i can really think up at the moment. All the best ones, anyways. Thompson the rogue is still a work-in-progress, and most of the rest about Archer aren't that good, like the one with the Moon King and his time with Red Riding Hood.
    >> Ants 04/26/10(Mon)13:08 No.9442385
    And the time he fell through the vents onto a masturbating Amazon and had a midlevel God of Love join him for a threesome, but I think we've bored the crowd here.
    >> Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)13:08 No.9442386
    Well for some reason the party had assigned him to be the de facto leader, I think it had something to do with all the other party members being borderline to full out sociopaths, so people stopped questioning when his alcohol fueled, incredibly poor decisions. Like trying to destroy evidence of fucked up clockwyrk horror covered in his blood in an apartment they'd been investigating for a serial killer by breaking the stove gas line and then lighting a cigarette while running for the fire escape; and when I say 'they were investigating' I mean the group was actually working with the local police force for once, so this was a monumentally poor decision, but hey, none of the sociopaths tried to stop it and the whiskey thought it seemed okay at the time. This alone would only have been bad, but then we track the killer down to a possessed hospital (yep, the whole hospital was possessed; ways to remove the possession according to the storyteller after the fact 'I guess you could blow up the entirety of an inner city hospital... what the fuck white wolf'). Which would've been swell, if not for the fact that the hospital's spirit could use phones, and call in a hostage situation after we had snuck in a pretty hefty armory to try to take down the killer. So we get the police surrounding the building, which is all peaches because of the previous events they think we're at best criminally retarded and at worst domestic terrorists. But its cool, we managed to sneak in separately, maybe we can meet up and find a way out right? Oh, right, we're all alone and there's a serial killer on the loose... and I'm unarmed, shit.
    >> Tabrias 04/26/10(Mon)13:26 No.9442629
    I'm F5'ing like the fist of the north star actually.
    >> Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)13:32 No.9442718
    Grant (as the character was named, though just Grant, they wouldn't let me give him the first name Ulysses for some reason) is now being stalked through a hospital that actively wants to get him killed, but some how I manage to nobly run the fuck away from the killer, reunite with the group and deliver some justice, Boondock Saints style. We all felt like roses for wrapping that up but oh right the police who are about to raid the building. We could just surrender and face a couple decades in the pen or... is there a helicopter on the roof? Our storyteller gets a little smirk and just says 'You going to go check? Oh, yes yes there is.' Instantly I volunteer to fly it, which the group for some reason goes along with. I proceed to get maybe two miles away from the hospital before gracefully crashing it into downtown Philadelphia (gracefully because somehow no one was seriously injured, in spite of the storytellers best intentions). The group hit the ground running and with any luck Grant's made it to Cancun by now, drowning his demons in cheap tequila and even cheaper cigarettes.
    >> ViolenceIsAPerformanceArt 04/26/10(Mon)13:42 No.9442838
    Alright. My memory's a little hazy as to what the rest of the party was doing at the time, but Archer decided to sneak off into the vents. Why? He's Archer. That's all the explanation you need here. This is who he is. The GM's getting rather sick of this. So, he has him fall through a grating down onto a gigantic amazon with a horrifically destructive weapon next to her while she's enjoying an.... intimate moment. Things look bad for our Hero. And so, he does the dumbest thing imaginable. He propositions her. And then.... He rolls a natural twenty. The GM's very soul screams.

    So, the amazon figures that his little thing is better than nothing, so they start banging away, and the GM has them repeatedly interrupted by tougher and tougher encounters, while Acher's dropping rolls like he's never seen before.
    >> ViolenceIsAPerformanceArt 04/26/10(Mon)13:44 No.9442859
    Finally, one of the other players turns to the GM, and says "Why not try this guy?" and passes his character sheet from a previous game, a half dragon mid-tier God of Love. Kenny grins, and has the God appear, and turn to Archer and ask "Mind if I join in?" and then, Archer gives the response the GM never expected.

    So, there's Archer and this Half-Dragon God double-teaming this amazon and the GM has bitten through his bottom lip.
    >> ViolenceIsAPerformanceArt 04/26/10(Mon)13:47 No.9442894
    The only revenge the GM got here is he threw the God on Archer's list of contacts as a +3 disposition, which means, as a god, he'll occasionally show up just for the hell of it without being called. Which means a very loud Dragon God of Love on rollerskates occasionally appeared while the party was trying to sneak around or other inconvenient moments.
    >> Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)14:52 No.9443801
    Vowelless Insect Name. I am losing cool points for figuring that out. :-(
    >> Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)15:59 No.9444938
    Thread saved.Is there anything out in the open about this system yet, because fuck me, I want in.
    >> Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)16:32 No.9445551
         File1272313920.jpg-(13 KB, 180x174, angry-marine-is-extra-angry1.jpg)
    13 KB

    because MOAR

    (pic related angry marine is angre because lack of stuff to read)
    >> Ants 04/26/10(Mon)19:09 No.9448784
    Not quite yet. In about a year or so look for it. Phase Shift. It's almost ready, but not quite. It's been I think eight years since the maker's started on it, and he hopes to have it ready for publishing by then.
    >> ViolenceIsAPerformanceArt 04/26/10(Mon)19:10 No.9448800
    The GM is reading all this right now and is amazed that anybody wants to hear about it. Please post saying you want him to start talking, i think you've stunned him. This is entertaining the HELL out of me.
    >> PhaseShiftGM !W.7q/2SzGY 04/26/10(Mon)19:15 No.9448890
    Howdy. I'm the GM and creator of the system my players have been babbling on about. It's been six years in the making and it's nearly done (nearly!). I don't know how in the holy hell I'll get it published, but I'm certainly going to try.

    Willis's retirement was unfortunate (he was endlessly entertaining) but necessary. While this game is nearing completion, it still isn't there yet, and there are holes in the rules I need to fill. Violence is a great tester for these things. I've promised to reward him with a few bylines and his character included in a list of Powerful NPCs for use in games.

    Since my players brought this to my attention, I thought I could tell some stories, too. I have a few that they've yet to hear, and some about them, too. I've been at it so long that I've got a million of 'em.

    So, I think I'll tell the Tale of the Archmage and the Hole in the Ground...
    >> ViolenceIsAPerformanceArt 04/26/10(Mon)19:21 No.9449002
    If you're interested in the system, send a line to violenceisaperformanceart@gmail.com and I'll get your information to the GM when he needs new players or begins selling the handbooks.
    >> PhaseShiftGM !W.7q/2SzGY 04/26/10(Mon)19:25 No.9449083
    Alright, this was the culmination of the campaign featuring Archer, Chrono, Psychic, and Scibot. The entire point of their campaign can be summarized thusly:

    In this sci-fantasy universe, access to magic is controlled by a group called "The Brotherhood of Magic". It's ruled by a body called the Council of Thirteen, with its thirteen Archmages, and at the tip-top, the Supreme Archmage, the Wizard King or Witch Queen (depending on gender). One of the Archmages, Arch-sorceress Celeste (she ruled over chronomancy, which is time magic) had disappeared, and the school was being torn apart by infighting among the power-hungry, timebending elite. So to head off a civil war, the Wizard King (Archmage Alexander) went looking for her. He disappeared too. Not a great idea, because without him things were going to shit fast. Within six months the whole group is ready to dissolve into a giant bloody light show of a magical war.

    The party were mercenaries who had responded to a job offer by a person called Number 4. He turned out to be a powerful chronomancer (the fourth most powerful, thus the nickname) and he wanted to find Alexander before things went to shit. It was a long, drawn-out, supercomplicated search, but eventually they stumbled upon their big break: the location of Celeste.
    >> PhaseShiftGM !W.7q/2SzGY 04/26/10(Mon)19:26 No.9449095
    She was at the end of time (one of the few safe areas of space-time for time traveling, under this system), enjoying a tea party with infinite copies of herself. She'd let time get away from her (har har) and when she realized what had happened, she was all nervous and bothered. Under the system's rules for time travel, it's hard and dangerous to do, even for powerful mages like her, so going back to the moment she left was right out. Her personal timeline no longer matched, so she couldn't really go there without fucking things up.

    So the party members start asking the infinite copies of Celeste what to do, with callous disregard for the time-space continuum. And, guess what, it works...
    >> PhaseShiftGM !W.7q/2SzGY 04/26/10(Mon)19:31 No.9449179
    This unorthodox line of questioning turns up, eventually, the location of the lost Alexander. Not really knowing what to do, he'd went to the Fourth Dimension to look for her.

    In the setting, the Fourth Dimension can be broken into accidentally by chronomancers who abuse space-time just a little too hard, or who become "chrono-enlightened" about the nature of time, become 4D beings, and leave the 3D world forever. They can't get back, either, so it's not a place you want to go unless you're STUPIDLY powerful; only a handful of people can get back, Alex and Celeste being the only two currently alive. Alex figures, at least, it couldn't hurt to look. Future Celeste #w/e starts giggling at this point, but the party ignores it.
    >> PhaseShiftGM !W.7q/2SzGY 04/26/10(Mon)19:34 No.9449250
    Present Celeste takes them to the Fourth Dimension, but she has to stay behind to keep the way out open, so the party sets out. To their surprise, they find it to be a lot like a resort, with every "enlightened" chronomancer from history just lying around, bein' lazy. (The ones who get there via mistake don't have it so well, but that's another story)

    They start bugging the lollygaggers, but don't get much info. They figure out that "time" here has no relation to 3D time, but at the moment can't find any use for it yet. Eventually, though, they find somebody who remembers seeing Alex, and he point them to a little cave a ways away that he saw Alex head off towards.
    >> PhaseShiftGM !W.7q/2SzGY 04/26/10(Mon)19:37 No.9449310
    Turns out that the strongest mage in all the universe had fallen into a hole and couldn't get out. Magic didn't work the same way here so he couldn't just use it to get out, and since time was fucked up, he'd only thought he was in there for half an hour. The party put their Strength stats to good use hauling him out of the damn hole, after laughing at him for a few rounds.

    That's correct. A hole. In the ground. Had trapped the strongest wizard in history for six months. Nothing special about it, just a hole in the ground. Granted, it was in the Fourth Dimension, but still.
    >> PhaseShiftGM !W.7q/2SzGY 04/26/10(Mon)19:39 No.9449351
    I had hoped to anger the party with this anticlimax, but they were stoked. I'd spent months getting them mixed up in epic conflicts, ancient mysteries, and what the hell else I thought up. But they thought it was so funny they went with it.

    A bit of an anticlimax to start with, but I had to get that one out there. If people like, I can talk about how Scibot got his lab assistants, a pair of British, tea-drinking, intelligent velociraptors.
    >> call_me_ishmail 04/26/10(Mon)19:41 No.9449380
    So I think I shall tell the story of the mage who decided to take a nap and died. A little back story first though. My character is a bard named Dr Worm. Bards in this game are mages who deal in a very special magic called audiomancy. Pretty much anything you can think of doing, you can do with this magic. You can create deadly waves of sound among other things. It can even literally affect minds. Make you think something isn't there even though it is. This is important.

    So we go off to the lair of the BBEG. This guy is a geomancer and umbramancer. This pretty much means he can mess with all forms of earth, and darkness. We get into his lair, and we catch a glimpse of him and two of his cronies in this lava pit before the entire place turns black. He used umbramancy to remove the light in this lava pool. Thinking quickly, V'wlls turns into his dragon form and we all sit upon his back. Normally I was a fairly worthless character and I will admit it. At that time all I knew about my magic was I could make sound that hurt.
    >> call_me_ishmail 04/26/10(Mon)19:41 No.9449392
    After looking over my sheet, I had forgotten I had two songs in my arsenal I could play: Outer Space Blues, and Lullaby. The first made people depressed and they wouldn't want to do anything. The second made people sleep. Normally fairly worthless because I couldn't do anything while playing them or lose the effect. Well when I realized we were in a giant umbramantic field being controlled by these three, I asked the GM as verification that if they fell asleep, their magic would stop. The GM said yes. Now me, thinking that nothing else would happen but let us see, started playing my lullaby. I managed to succeed, the three guys failed, and the umbramancy went away. It was at this time that I had forgotten that when we first fell into the giant pit of lava, the geomancer had dove into the lava and was casting from there, immune via a protective spell.

    Remember that I said that all magic goes away when you sleep, even that enchantment that kept the guy alive in lava. The umbramancy went away, the guys enchantment went away, and the BBEG died in the first turn from taking a nap in lava. This was such an epic move, I got a couple of extra skill points from doing this.
    >> ViolenceIsAPerformanceArt 04/26/10(Mon)19:57 No.9449704
    Alright. Since Ish is here, let me tell you about how he gained the power of Gluttony. Doctor Worm is a Program, a sentient being made out of code that exists in physical reality through magic. They can possess machines. So, high magic fields can have.... fun effects on his body. We were tracking down some high-power magical gems, and we'd sourced them at this one dude's apartment. And with the high levels of contained magic, Ish starts going a little crazy. And Then, Our priest tries to turn the food replicator into a weapon-maker. It doesn't work, and starts spurting gravy everywhere. And so, Doctor Worm begins drinking it, all of it. When he's had his fill, the stuff is starting to flood the room, so Willis drops his pocket-dimension hip flask (currently containing liquid people, napalm, vodka, and now gravy in seperate pockets.)
    >> DMine 04/26/10(Mon)19:58 No.9449724
    Hey, Dmine1847.exe here.
    You see, I'm a program, basically a very specialized elemental who is made out of the physical manifestation of code. My class powers allow me to possess machinery and enter code systems, which can come in very handy. Now, I happen to play a crafter character in Phase Shift, the scientist to my friends mage. And we get down to crafting shenanigans. I note that Beelord has already been mentioned, so I'll just stick to some other crafting nonsense.
    >> DMine 04/26/10(Mon)19:59 No.9449737
    I helped break Willis.
    Then came Beelord.
    We learned our lessons regarding organic stuff, so I stuck to machinery, and upgraded my class into well, Machinest. Which leads into an interesting subject. I have a character flaw where I am compelled to use Nanotechnology in every instance possible. Max skill in nanotechnology of course, with the scientist bonus in addition. I also had very low damage resistance. So I decide to make myself a suit of power armor. Made out of nanobots. I get more damage resistance than the rest of my party, but for a price. My armor can upgrade itself at risk of becoming sentient and killing us all. Awesome. Ordinarily, you would just abandon the armor. No fucking way. I went and stuck all my most powerful gear in it. Just for the hell of it all. Now I'm a god among programs who barely ever takes damage. And who at any time could flip out and have my soul eaten by my own armor. So worth it
    >> ViolenceIsAPerformanceArt 04/26/10(Mon)20:04 No.9449844
    We go outside to see three goons from the generic goon factory (not really, but you get what i'm saying, right?) waiting for us. Ishmael, still crazy and hungry, slices them up and devours them. And complains of thirst. So, i had him my hip flask. He drains the vodka and the napalm, and I'm not sure if he finished off the gravy. And after all that, he gained the Sin power of Gluttony. Which means that anything he can fit in his mouth (which, may i add, since he has no fixed dimensions, is a dangerously flexible thing), he can eat without becoming any definition of full. It vanishes, like it never existed. Doctor Worm was quickly becoming a silent but frightening force behind the scenes.
    >> Ants 04/26/10(Mon)20:05 No.9449864
    Oh man, this has ceased to be an Awesome Character Thread and become a Phase Shift Advertisement Thread XD
    >> PhaseShiftGM !W.7q/2SzGY 04/26/10(Mon)20:08 No.9449916

    I blame you for telling me about this thread.
    >> Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)20:23 No.9450193
    sounds awesome
    and its getting me interested in rpgs...
    >> Ants 04/26/10(Mon)20:32 No.9450369
    Shit, Phase Shift was my first tabletop, so I know how you feel.

    /shameless advertising
    >> PhaseShiftGM !W.7q/2SzGY 04/26/10(Mon)20:34 No.9450412
    This one's short. During the campaign, Scibot's group had stumbled into a warehouse full of assassin goons. There was a ton; it was a mini-boss encounter, and they were there to swarm while the mini-boss did his work.

    Chrono figured he'd suck the goons into a temporal vortex, but he fucked up. He ended up summoning some dinosaurs from the distant past. These two velociraptors were rather surprised to be here, needless to say. Chrono ran off, so as not to get eaten.
    >> PhaseShiftGM !W.7q/2SzGY 04/26/10(Mon)20:37 No.9450454
    So the battle played out a bit differently; the two raptors ran around eviscerating goons and helped a bit with the mini-boss. During the fight, Chrono cast on them again to send them back, but it didn't work. Instead, he hyper-evolved them, making them have extremely high intelligence.

    After the battle was cleared, the party found the raptors off in a corner discussing philosophy over some dude's leg. So Scibot just straight-up asked if they'd work for him as his scientific lab assistants. He rolled well, and they said yes.

    He made them wear top hats and monocles, but they didn't mind.
    >> Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)20:41 No.9450532

    I want this game.
    >> Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)20:42 No.9450548

    Those gears cannot move, ops image bothers the fuck outta me.
    >> DMine 04/26/10(Mon)20:44 No.9450595

    Now, im pretty new to Phase Shift, but im pretty sure its the symbol of some faction or another. *shrugs* Phase Shift is a full time game, to be honest, just tossing around pulpy ideas and following the rule of cool to have a great game experience. Its probably less time for the non-crafters, though I cant vouch for that.
    >> ViolenceIsAPerformanceArt 04/26/10(Mon)20:47 No.9450642

    It's something else entirely. Look up Doktor Sleepless if you must.
    >> PhaseShiftGM !W.7q/2SzGY 04/26/10(Mon)20:50 No.9450701

    Developing it is full-time, but once it's done both crafters and GMs will have enough item resources to (hopefully) streamline the process by a huge degree.

    Also, who wants to hear the Story of How the Evil Dwarf Turned a God into a Pokemon?
    >> Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)20:53 No.9450756
    a human telepathic psionic who was once leader of a cult, the war that this campaign centered around led to him losing his fortune, land, and cult.

    he led his cult because he believed he had an ancient god inside him and using his telepathy he would show them the "god" and them teach them of what could be in stor for them if they were followers. I played him as a lawful good and managed to throughout my campaign recruited a paladin, warlock, bard, barbarian, ranger, rogue, and an avenger and they followed me to the point where they would die for me, the paladin did but was able to be brought back.
    >> Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)21:08 No.9451031
    My only really awesome character happened in a GURPS (I know, I know) sci-fi game. He was a bitter veteran of the SPACE MARINE CORPS who bore an unusual resemblance to Lenin and was very good with precision weapons.
    Long story short, he ended up shooting down nukes out of the back of a spacecraft leaving a planet's orbit using his precision rifle. The nukes were being fired into the atmosphere by a token Imperial Sterilization Ship at the colony below.

    I rolled very, very well and felt super badass.
    >> PhaseShiftGM !W.7q/2SzGY 04/26/10(Mon)21:14 No.9451122
    On my second campaign with the players behind Scibot's group, I mixed things up. They were playing powerful evil characters. There was a dwarf priest, an artificial organic (homunculus) bard, a fairy (in this system, a race of feared, bloodthirsty warriors) who preferred to talk out his problems, and a spirit who was an assassin. This story, though, is all about Overkill the Priest.

    I called them that for a reason. In this setting, dwarves are peaceful, primitive hippies. He wasn't. Oh, no, he wasn't. He worshiped an evil god, and he did it via the application of a ridiculous amount of deadly force. He had an 8-foot-tall suit of power armor, and a hydraulic hammer bigger than his entire body. It weighed two tons.
    >> PhaseShiftGM !W.7q/2SzGY 04/26/10(Mon)21:14 No.9451142
    We started off this campaign trying to bring back Overkill's god, who was dead. Part of the ritual to bring him back was the sacrifice of an inhabited planet. For the magic, they had to draw a spell circle around it. They accomplished this via the planet's weather control station.

    But blowing it up would be harder. It was under the protection of a local god, who was just opening a new hospital. The group posed as fans of the god's, there for a meet and greet that happened to be going to commemorate the new hospital. The group played their hand early and ended up in a shootout with the planet's military to distract them while Overkill was doing what the group had come to do: take out the god so they could blow up the planet.
    >> PhaseShiftGM !W.7q/2SzGY 04/26/10(Mon)21:15 No.9451162
    Overkill is in this epic battle with the god. He's barely managing to hold his own, mainly because he could control darkness and use it to both blind the god and hit from every direction. After a long, bloody battle, Overkill had him down. So, on a whim, he decides to use his special priest magic (which gives him a degree of control over spirits) to trap the god and fuck with him. Instead of killing him, he traps the god in a gem.

    They blow up the planet and resurrect Overkill's god and things are going swimmingly. Overkill uses his powers to strip out the god's sentience and craft its essence into a giant horrible spirit dragon that would obey only him, which he could summon via the gemstone. Basically, a Pokemon. And Overkill never let me forget that part. He loved to reference it.
    >> PhaseShiftGM !W.7q/2SzGY 04/26/10(Mon)21:16 No.9451192

    That's fuckin' badass. I'd love to see that happen in a game I run. I'd have to clap.
    >> Commissar Wibble 04/26/10(Mon)21:20 No.9451275
    G'day. Two things: I WANT TO GET IN ON THIS.
    Violence, you'll be getting an email from me before the day is out. I'll def by the system for my club when it gets out.

    The Racist Australian Moon King. I must hear more.
    >> ViolenceIsAPerformanceArt 04/26/10(Mon)21:25 No.9451355
    You wanna tell it, GM, or should i?
    >> PhaseShiftGM !W.7q/2SzGY 04/26/10(Mon)21:26 No.9451385

    I've been talking a lot since I entered the thread. You do it.
    >> Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)21:28 No.9451432
    OP, this sounds like the greatest game ever. I'm so going to play Cockroachmen.
    >> Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)21:29 No.9451454
    That was about his shining moment, though I did roll pretty well several other times in general combat situations. And there was the time we had a crateful of antimatter grenades that we decided to drop in front of a huge crawling bio-harvest tank.. That I set off by shooting out a pin we had wired to all of the grenades at once.

    In hindsight it was incredibly stupid as it blew a huge hole in the bottom of the 'collection' ship we were hiding in but it did prompt us to steal a ship and flee like hell.
    >> ViolenceIsAPerformanceArt 04/26/10(Mon)21:32 No.9451506
    The ship crashed. Everyone survived, but they'd gotten seperated and by the time they'd woke up, all their stuff was gone. The moon was uncharted. Eventually they found each other, but Dr. Chill's dog was lost for a while. Chilly Dog had his own adventure. He became the leader of a wolf pack. For a while. Mainly because he could breathe fire and was, by this point, nearly human-level intelligence. Oh, and he could fly. He was a Scottish terrier. An evil one. They'd gotten a psychic to transfer the megalomania and pyromania to Chilly Dog. In order to keep Chill from killing them all.

    Anyway, our heroes had made friends now. They'd worked out their aggression. So they wandered around and, surprise, they were captured by unknown alien tribespeople. They brought them to their king, who was a pilot from the moon of T'Dek. He'd crashed there ten years prior with his Mekko co-pilot, who had been damaged in the crash. He was inoperative, but the tribespeople worshiped him as a god. Anyway, the pilot was very friendly and very Australian, but he was a HORRIBLE racist. He had a bagful of epithets for ALL of them.
    >> Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)21:32 No.9451515
    Listen now, for I shall tell the story of Kal-Tir, my character in a friend’s homebrew eldar version of Dark Heresy.

    Kal-Tir is an ex-Fire Dragon turned Dark Reaper of a mere 470 years, the second youngest of the party of four specialists hand-picked for special assignments to sensitive for direct intervention, or to intricate for large army operations.

    The other team members are:

    Keisha – Our resident farseer

    Cael’is – Warlock and the farseer’s bodyguard

    Di’nah – A howling banshee that is a bit too enthralled by the thrill of personal combat, also the youngest member of the group

    The team had traveled to an imperial planet under siege by the forces of chaos by means of an ancient webgate, with orders to extricate the imperial governor within the time of a week. The eldar council had predicted that this governor’s offspring would be vital for the survival of the craftworld some years down the line, as so called in us to do the extraction.
    >> Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)21:33 No.9451530

    After having located the imperial palace, the hive-city that surrounded and unfortunately the bulk of the chaos horde besieging it and lobbing artillery shells and spewing anti-aircraft fire into the hive-city with a randomness only found in warp tainted beings, Kal-Tir and the rest of the team does a quick recon of the outlying chaos forces. They come upon a small redoubt consisting of an earthshaker artillery piece, two small flak pieces, a covered munitions/troop transport vehicle and the crew manning the redoubt. Kal-Tir lock down his Dark Reaper armor in battle mode and starts blasting chaos scum left, right and center with his reaper launcher while Keisha tries to blast the remaining chaos troops with psychic powers but rolls perils of the warp and summons a rain of blood. The last of the chaos scum goes down to Kal-Tirs reaper launcher in a bloody mist and he releases his armor-locks.
    >> Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)21:34 No.9451555

    The team now has a way into the city in the form of a blood drenched troop transport. Kal-Tir takes the driver’s seat and starts up the vehicle, after a while the team is on their way through the chaos cordon with cultists thinking that they are Khornate reinforcements. This image is improved when Di’nah starts to take potshots from the back of the truck, nailing cultists with her shuriken pistol and making it look like people spontaneously burst apart when they drive past.

    After having overtaken a rumbling, chaos icon encrusted and smoke-spewing Leman Russ battle tank the team enters the hive-city at what goes for maximum speed for the transport vehicle, while Keisha tries to scry the teams near future to avoid any trouble and almost makes Kal-Tir jump out of his seat when she scream for his to halt the vehicle as they are approaching a T-junction. Kal-Tir slams the brakes, or where the brakes would be if this was an eldar vehicle and hurriedly turns the wheel around to make a 180 degree turn. Unfortunately the pedal he thought was the brake was actually the clutch. It is around this time the vehicle’s wheels gets grip again and sends the vehicle tumbling on its side. Now the troop transport is sliding, side first, into the T-junction at high speed, leaving a trail of sparks and scraped-of paint behind it.
    >> Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)21:35 No.9451572

    When they slide into the junction, Kal-Tir and Keisha that are sitting in the front notices that some loyalists has set up an autocannon emplacement to the right and is spewing hot lead at a horde of chaos troopers advancing up the road, this means that the team is smack-bang in the line of fire. As the screeching of metal against rockcrete subsides and the troop transport comes to a halt Keisha crawl’s out of the wrecked transport, turns to Cael’is, who jumped out from the troop compartment when the transport began to roll, and takes a autocannon round in the side. as Kal-Tir sees Keisha go down he smashes the windscreen and crawls out, hauling his reaper launcher free from the wreckage, screaming to the others to “protect the farseer!”. After having gotten to his feet he lines up his reaper launcher and gives covering fire while the others scramble to retrieve the fallen but not quite dead farseer. Only when the leman russ battle tank they overtook earlier draws so near that he can hear the turret traversing does he retreat to regroup with the others, having bought them enough time to get the badly wounded farseer to cover some houses away.
    >> ViolenceIsAPerformanceArt 04/26/10(Mon)21:37 No.9451618
    Spear-ears, spoonbender, boltbucket, sandy... all nice little words for this group of adventurers. Well, the pilot was very friendly to them all, but by the time he'd called them all about eight or not different racist/classist/whateverist names they were starting to get a bit... uptight. He told them he'd give their items back, but that they'd probably be stuck here. The guys decided to work together and cobble together a working escape module with parts from their ship and the king's old ship. He said he'd let them do it, if they'd also try to reactivate his buddy. They agree.

    Within a few days they've got a working hulk from the king's old ship with some parts of theirs. They reactivate the Mekko. He is HORRIFIED. He's been offline for ten years, marooned on a strange planet, and worshiped by aliens? He was not happy. The pilot tried to convince him to stay with him, but the Mekko would not have it. He offered to fly the guys off if they'd let him come with. He RAN into the ship and... Off they went. The racist Australian from the moon waved goodbye and screamed a few more choice obscenities. Then he went back to doing not much of anything. Oh, yeah, and Chilly Dog wandered back before they took off. His wolves were gonna kill the aliens but they saw Dr. Chill so Chilly Dog went back to the doc and told the wolves to leave or he'd kill them.
    >> Commissar Wibble 04/26/10(Mon)21:40 No.9451682
    Oh lawl. That's fucking epic. I simply MUST get into this game system.
    >> PhaseShiftGM !W.7q/2SzGY 04/26/10(Mon)21:49 No.9451856

    I was extremely proud of that NPC. When I told my players, "Well, he's an Austrailian from the moon, and he's addressing you by racist slurs" the laughter didn't stop for a full minute, at least.
    >> Pandora Man !!XJrnWudTU0I 04/26/10(Mon)21:53 No.9451930
    Ok, I NEED to get into this RPG. Sure, the flaws are kinda bad for GM, but I think they add a good kinda touch.

    Nevertheless, this will be AWESOME once it's finished.
    >> Commissar Wibble 04/26/10(Mon)22:02 No.9452075
    Bumpan for Phase Shift epicness.
    >> Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)22:02 No.9452082
    rolled 6, 5, 6 = 17

    epic thread is epic
    >> Pandora Man !!XJrnWudTU0I 04/26/10(Mon)22:03 No.9452094
    I know.

    Should someone archive this?
    >> Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)22:04 No.9452110
    Do it. do it now! We need this thread archived
    >> Commissar Wibble 04/26/10(Mon)22:06 No.9452127
    Move zig, for great justice!

    In other words: ARCHIVE GOGOGO
    >> Pandora Man !!XJrnWudTU0I 04/26/10(Mon)22:06 No.9452133
    On it.
    >> Pandora Man !!XJrnWudTU0I 04/26/10(Mon)22:09 No.9452196

    >> PhaseShiftGM !W.7q/2SzGY 04/26/10(Mon)22:10 No.9452209
    Here's another short one, because I've got to eat supper and do some sort for my capstone. College is a bitch.

    A group of players had been looking for a psychic criminal who was holed up somewhere. They followed a truck he'd stolen into a mysterious warehouse, that upon further examination was owned by a frozen fish company.

    Psychics are another type of caster in this system, so they're not very physically powerful. During the psychic's villain monologue atop a catwalk, one of my players grabbed a frozen fish and tossed it at him. He rolled a 20.

    The fish knocked the psychic off the catwalk and the fall broke his legs. He put up a frantic fight that was dampened by my shitty rolls. My players rolled well, and had soon killed him... using only frozen fish as weapons.
    >> Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)22:13 No.9452269
    >He also killed every last fucker in that encampment

    That isn't fucking back-story, that's a fucking hero.

    Go learn how to write a reasonable back-story.
    >> Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)22:14 No.9452279
    >> Commissar Wibble 04/26/10(Mon)22:14 No.9452284
    Suddenly the Fish Slapping Dance became a fightan technique.
    >> Pandora Man !!XJrnWudTU0I 04/26/10(Mon)22:15 No.9452291
    This is why this thread was archived.
    >> Ants 04/26/10(Mon)22:20 No.9452375
    This campaign began us as being reasonably powerful. Say, 2x a normal person in our dominant area, and 1 - 1.5x in our normal or weak ones.
    >> PhaseShiftGM !W.7q/2SzGY 04/26/10(Mon)22:23 No.9452445

    I think he's referring to the "killing a whole encampment" part, not the strength.

    Willis's story said that he got discharged for mental problems after that episode, not for it, if I remember right. Violence wrote it, I can't say for sure.
    >> ViolenceIsAPerformanceArt 04/26/10(Mon)22:35 No.9452706

    Yes. The whole thing was comprised within a very severe mental breakdown. Yes, he did well. But he'd also lost his flipping mind. He was using people to kill other people. He was discharged not for the ACT but for the mere fact he's gone out of his gorram mind. He was seriously non-functional for a week. His own father served the papers.
    >> PhaseShiftGM !W.7q/2SzGY 04/26/10(Mon)22:37 No.9452755

    Plus it references the rich Phase Shift tradition of "using people as improvised weapons to kill other people". I always approve of that.
    >> Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)22:39 No.9452789
    I literally just lost a character who was anger incarnate.

    Each time he attacked, it would usually be accompanied by a scream, roar, yell, quotes like "All of my hate!" "Fury guide my spear!" "I will never stop hating you!" etc.

    He went out trying to break a demonic altar before it could finish summoning demons (first level character btw), failing, and as the demons laughed at him, he slit his throat in refusal of letting the demons have the pleasure of killing him.

    I enjoyed that guy.

    Not INSANELY awesome, but good enough for me.
    >> ViolenceIsAPerformanceArt 04/26/10(Mon)22:46 No.9452940

    This particular embarassment was going to be part of his endgame, literally storming the fortress and taking on his father in combat for basically destroying his chances of geting into high leadership in the Byakkarian Military and dooming him to be a mercenary for the rest of his life. Since, at this point, he couldn't NOT fight. It was mercenary work, or the mental institution for dear ol' willis. The truth was, the father had no real choice, since willis, when being served his papers, was in a reinforced straight jacket to prevent him beating the orderlies to death and babbling in nonsensical word salad.
    >> Anonymous 04/26/10(Mon)23:44 No.9454033
         File1272339876.jpg-(62 KB, 480x360, 1270156405511.jpg)
    62 KB
    justice bump.
    >> PhaseShiftGM !W.7q/2SzGY 04/27/10(Tue)00:02 No.9454358
    I'll tell one more story before I fade away for the night. If the players have anything they want to share, they might, though.

    Dr. Chill, otherwise known as Scibot, was a very busy character. When there was a timeskip, he established a business to sell some of his inventions to make money for the group. The rolls dictated that it was very successful. One of his business contacts was a respected and famous scientist: William Nye, the so-called Ghost of Science (for obvious reasons, i.e. he was a ghost.)
    >> PhaseShiftGM !W.7q/2SzGY 04/27/10(Tue)00:06 No.9454434
    Scibot had, by this point, modified his robotic body to transform into a small T-rex (roughly his normal body size, but it's the thought that counts). But he wanted more. He wanted something his player called the "Megaman armor". It was a specially enchanted laser cannon that scanned the target on kills (it had several types of scanners) and used Scibot's crazy nanobot super-science to replicate one of the target's unique abilities. So yeah, basically Megaman's Mega Buster.

    Scibot wasn't good enough to do it himself, so he struck a deal with Will; he'd help Scibot make this in exchange for a robot body with one of those installed, so he could inhabit it and go adventuring. Scibot agreed.
    >> PhaseShiftGM !W.7q/2SzGY 04/27/10(Tue)00:08 No.9454476
    So they invented this Mega Buster. Scibot installed it in his arm. Will used his new robosuit to become a, well, a superhero and quit his job as a scientist.

    Scibot stole quite a few powers, including ghost powers. A ghostly robotic T-rex with laser arms is quite the sight, as a guard at a warehouse soon found out...
    >> Prophet Caan 04/27/10(Tue)00:09 No.9454499
    Right then, I'm yet another one of the Phase Shift Testing Crew. I play a Faerie Soldier, the group's Only Sane Woman. That's right, the soldier with a hairtrigger temper is the party's voice of reason. Though granted, with the company she kept, you can see why.

    Now our scientist had come up with an unique weapon, never seen before in the galaxy, and he wanted to sell it to one of two companies called the Death Merchants. You don't get a name like that without really being assholes, and both companies had been trying to get it for themselves. By killing him, and us by extension. I should probably mention that these fuckers have technology a decade ahead of the military, as well.

    So we're minding our own business, trying to get information on a mage, when BOOM! These motherfuckers get the drop on us. Literally. From a hovercraft.

    I have a power that allows me to go first if I roll well enough. I also had picked up a power last campaign that allows me to instantly kill anyone if I crit. I'm not a good roller.

    So I manage to roll well enough to get the first turn in. I ask our GM what all I can see - ten goons and their pilot. I decide to take a shot at the pilot (with a drill-spear that can fire its head; it's a long story).

    Bones are rolled, and I roll 20 - critical hit! I remind our GM of my power.

    "Caan?" our GM said. "Fuck you."

    The hovercraft went flying blocks away, and though one goon managed to bail, the remaining nine died when the craft crashed into a building.

    I ended up remaking my character the next week because of the changes that Willis brought about to the Soldier class. Instant Kill was notably absent from the list of powers.
    >> PhaseShiftGM !W.7q/2SzGY 04/27/10(Tue)00:11 No.9454557
    So, at this point, Scibot spent most of his time as a robosaur. One day, he and Archer just wandered into a warehouse. Archer was riding him, like some sort of badass mount. Everyone there failed some mental rolls and refused to believe their eyes because this was so fucking ridiculous, so Scibot and Archer walked unmolested deep into the heart of the building. One dumbfounded guard watched as they stole pretty much everything from the office, including the deed to the warehouse. He was too shocked to stop them.

    Scibot and Archer winked and thanked the guard, Scibot went ghostly and erased the security recordings, and they left.

    The guard ended up arrested and sent to jail for grand theft because nobody believed his story about the robot dinosaur ghost with the top hat and the elf riding on its back. Scibot took over as owner of the warehouse, and nobody ever figured out how he got that deed.
    >> Anonymous 04/27/10(Tue)00:13 No.9454588
    I have to ask, I assume you guys do this in person, but where are you people from? Insanity-Canada?
    >> PhaseShiftGM !W.7q/2SzGY 04/27/10(Tue)00:14 No.9454620

    This particular test is online, but I've normally done it in person. At the moment, I can't easily hold games in person; moving in with my fiance has changed things a lot.
    >> Anonymous 04/27/10(Tue)00:20 No.9454766
    We're from all across the US. We normally play on IRC on saturdays, but we talk about it all week long on skype, pretty much. I'm currently running a rogue named Thompson Ponzi who is on his way to speccing as a Celebrity.
    >> Anonymous 04/27/10(Tue)00:20 No.9454779
    If it's online, I would love to get involved. I've done beta-testing before, but not alpha. If you're taking applicants, I'd love to take a crack at it, otherwise, I'll understand if you don't wanna recruit off of 4Chan :3
    >> Anonymous 04/27/10(Tue)00:21 No.9454806

    Look up earlier in the thread. There's an email address. We might need some players later and if nothing else we'll be able to give you information about further developments.
    >> Anonymous 04/27/10(Tue)00:22 No.9454828
    Alrighty, what information do you need?
    >> Anonymous 04/27/10(Tue)00:24 No.9454870

    Your email address, of course, and what you're interested in (play-testing the system, developments, information on where you can finally get the purchasable version once it gets published, etc). Some name or handle we can call you by would also be appreciated.
    >> PhaseShiftGM !W.7q/2SzGY 04/27/10(Tue)00:24 No.9454871

    Violence has been asking for enough of the mechanical info to GM his own test game. I keep the exact mechanics under lock and key as a strict policy; none of my players have seen all of my mechanics, ever, simply because I want to be safe.

    I've told Violence that I'll teach him how to run things (the system is really very simple; I'm intending to make it appeal mostly to first-time gamers and people who want big, flashy fun without worrying about things like elevation during combat), so getting ahold of him couldn't hurt if or when he decides to give GMing a shot.
    >> Anonymous 04/27/10(Tue)00:25 No.9454890
    Alrighty, i'll email Violence then and hope for the best.
    >> PhaseShiftGM !W.7q/2SzGY 04/27/10(Tue)00:26 No.9454904
    Oh, and while I'm here, I allowed a couple of my current player access to some of the core stat and combat mechanics in order to modify it.

    They made a working pen-and-paper Pokemon game based on my system. I was *impressed*.
    >> Anonymous 04/27/10(Tue)00:29 No.9454961
    Playing an Elan soulblade/psion/'eldritch knight'. With vigor and improved Elan resilience, he seems undefeatable, and unkillable.

    So far he's been swallowed whole on 3 seperate occasions, and in all three killed the thing that ate him in less than two rounds....emerging (apparently) unscathed.
    >> PhaseShiftGM !W.7q/2SzGY 04/27/10(Tue)00:30 No.9454975
    Oh, and I'll say that Violence got one little thing mixed up: this is beta test, although some aspects, like the Spy class, are in alpha. I replaced a few of my original classes and such, and as their replacements have yet to be played, I can't comfortably say they're "in beta" yet. The rest of the game, though, is in beta.

    No big deal, but I wanted to get that out there.
    >> Anonymous 04/27/10(Tue)00:36 No.9455092
    Well, that looks like that's about it from us, i think we've burned through our good stories and all that. I'm going to try and harass the GM into posting some Phase Shiftian lore in some later threads to get you a glimpse into the universe he's created. It's a a sight to behold, i tell you.
    >> Prophet Caan 04/27/10(Tue)00:40 No.9455204
    More of a story of epic fail than epic win from Phase Shift, from far earlier in our campaign...

    So Faeries, naturally, have wings. Thus, they can fly. After flying up a building while my fellow players have to deal with petty things like climb checks, I and my fellow players are jumped by two assassins (who would later become Rozencratz and Guildenstern, but I digress.) The assassins target me and the bard first, and as I roll very badly, I end up being knocked out. And off the building.

    I roll my Mind stat to try to wake up so I can actually not hit the ground. Check failed. I *said* I roll badly.

    Had one of our crazy stunt Vanguards not saved my unconscious ass, I would have hit the ground. The part where this is win comes from the fact that our GM *also* rolled badly on the damage.

    In short, I would have taken no damage from the fall. At all.

    God bless armor and the ability to wear it...
    >> Prophet Caan 04/27/10(Tue)00:42 No.9455235
    Okay. NOW we're done.
    >> PhaseShiftGM !W.7q/2SzGY 04/27/10(Tue)00:45 No.9455289

    I might have a few more stories, but they slip my mind at the moment. Oh, except for one...

    Once, for a change, I got to play a character instead of run a game. His name was Karamakah, and he came from a race of hyperintelligent lizard people. He was extraordinarily arrogant, and had turned to crime because of the intellectual challenge it offered.

    He was also selfish, immature, cowardly, and had an unhealthy sexual interest in machinery, to the point that he was getting cyborg'd because of it. He once got drunk and fucked a toaster.

    In one game, he ended up septuple-crossing his allies and employer to serve this evil, powerful necromancer. But he was such a sniveling coward that his master forced him to shoot himself in the crotch with a laser cannon (gun pointing upright, so he ended up in two neat pieces). In this system, death isn't the end, so he had more adventures, but I like that one the most.
    >> Anonymous 04/27/10(Tue)00:45 No.9455295
    This...this is beautiful
    >> Anonymous 04/27/10(Tue)00:50 No.9455397
    >He once got drunk and fucked a toaster.
    Whelp, that settles it. I'm buying this.
    >> Anonymous 04/27/10(Tue)01:46 No.9456412
    This isn't necessarily about my character, but I played in an D&D 3.5 eberron campaign a friend of mine was DMing, and rolled a paladin. When I got to the level that I could choose a mount, I noticed I could pick a bear. A FUCKING BEAR. This bear also had a crazy amount of hp and fortitude if i remember correctly. I was also allowed to use him in combat once a day, and he was pretty helpful, but not game breaking.

    So my character would use this awesome mount for just about everything, he would shred people's faces off and cool stuff like that. Well, my party went on a mission to rescue some important political guy. Well, we find him on this train, but then the DM tells us the bad guys sabotaged the brakes for the next train coming in. This was especially bad, because in eberron everything is powered by fucking elementals, so there would be a really big explosion (the whole station would get hit).

    So what do I do? I summon my bear mount, and have my party and the guy we were rescuing hide under my bear while the trains collided. The DM made me roll a shit ton of dice, but my bear made it with 2 hp left.

    On another mission, we were fighting the main boss guy on top of a building, when he jumped off to escape (he could fly or some shit), I proceeded to summon my bear mount and attempt to land on him. I rolled my saves and passed, and killed the guy upon landing. The DM didn't like this because he was supposed to be a recurring villain.

    After that, I wasn't allowed to summon my bear anymore.
    >> Anonymous 04/27/10(Tue)07:39 No.9460232
    >> Anonymous 04/27/10(Tue)07:44 No.9460285
    Does anyone have 4e GURPS Biotech? Well I was playing a THS military campaign and all the players were cybershells except me. Our GM didn't want me to feel gimped so he let me choose any number TL8-11 upgrades. Needless to say my character choose everyone in the book. How I managed to even describe that character still amazes me to today.
    >> Anonymous 04/27/10(Tue)08:16 No.9460661
    I am 'el oh elling' the entire thread, thanks guys
    >> Anonymous 04/27/10(Tue)08:19 No.9460692
    Good god.....
    >> Anonymous 04/27/10(Tue)08:33 No.9460792
    I think I may have found the perfect system for my friend to GM.

    He is the craziest motherfucker I know and giving a system where he's actually encouraged to powergame just might make living through his campaigns impossible.
    >> Anonymous 04/27/10(Tue)08:46 No.9460906
    Currently playing a 4E game in our GM's persistent campaign world, and he likes to invent some interesting loot for us. I'm playing a Minotaur Warden Through some random stuff, the guys in our campaign were awarded man-points, and the girls vice versa, which we could use once to boost particularly manly/womany ventures. I used mine to proposition the ridiculously powerful Dryad ruler of the forest. Oh Yeah.

    Anyhow, once we'd all used our man-points, we were rewarded with a man-specific item between us. So what we have is this daily use item made of three medallions, that when we put them together, the bearer is surrounded in this glowing black and red armour that boosts our str and defences and allows us to fly 5. Basicly, one of us becomes Iron Man. Fuck Yeah

    I get first use, and when the evil bitch necromancer we're fighting teleports onto a balcony, I fly up into the air and charge her, killing her outright and impaling her against the wall with my horns. Felt good
    >> Anonymous 04/27/10(Tue)09:11 No.9461242
         File1272373889.jpg-(87 KB, 1000x501, 0125Caskuda.jpg)
    87 KB

    Does any of you play Infinity? Because that sounds like Cascuda, which is even named after space cockroaches.
    >> PhaseShiftGM !W.7q/2SzGY 04/27/10(Tue)12:41 No.9464035

    I'm sorry, but other than the fact that both races are insectoid, they look and sound nothing like Byakkarians. And it's not like either of us were the first to think up insectoid aliens.
    >> Anonymous 04/27/10(Tue)14:13 No.9465305
    >> ViolenceIsAPerformanceArt 04/27/10(Tue)15:57 No.9466897
    Jesus Christ, this is still here?
    >> Anonymous 04/27/10(Tue)16:16 No.9467173
    Im gonna have to ask for a URL to the site if you have one...
    >> ViolenceIsAPerformanceArt 04/27/10(Tue)17:06 No.9468041

    We're still testing, so the website, book previews, and all other fun stuff is not ready yet. If you want more information when it is availible and a chance to get in on a playtesting group after he gives me the information necessary to GM a game, please send a mail to violenceisaperformanceart@gmail.com
    >> Anonymous 04/27/10(Tue)18:52 No.9470144
    Seems fun.
    >> Anonymous 04/27/10(Tue)19:38 No.9471242
    itt, viral marketing

    Delete Post [File Only]
    Style [Yotsuba | Yotsuba B | Futaba | Burichan]