>KILL SELF

Are those rhetorical?

>>9403385
What is kill, why am I doing it to myself?

You are Haruhi Suzumiya.

You are in my basement.

You are here for my pleasure.

You are:
A troll
On /tg/
Trying to shit up the board

QUEST OVER

>>9403389
What does that mean? You never answered my questions.

>>9403398
Why am I shitting up the board, I mean, yeah I guess trolls like to do this, but why again?

>>9403396
AM I KAWAII, MASTER? UGUU~

>>9403522

Is this still on?

We are a caveman
In a cave.
Do to caveman stuff.

>>9403750
yes :D

>>9403762
I am Caveman? Is that what you are going to call me from now on?

This cave is dark, it was helping me sleep and I like him when I am tired, but now he is dark and I am hungry and he wont help me get out, If I knew where my things were I would use my club to hit him!

>>9403869

Well, find your way around. Feel the floor for club.

>>9403869
Well let's explore the cave.

>>9403887
Okay! That is a really good idea! I like you!!!

I FEEL A HARD THING, HARD LIKE CLUB!

AND I FEEL LOTSA SMALL THINGS THAT FEEL HARD BUT MAKE MY HANDS FEEL SILLY

ALSO I FEEL SOFT CLOTH LIKE MY BAG OF BUGS

>>9404012
(forgot picture)

You look kind of hungry, you should eat some of your bugs.

>>9404024
GRAB HARD THING.

WE HUNGRY.

WHEN HUNGRY, WE EAT.

BUT CAN ONLY EAT DEAD THINGS. WE MAN, WE EAT MEAT.

WE MUST GET MEAT. GO FORTH, IN SEARCH OF SOON-TO-BE-MEAT.

You are reporting post 9403380 on /tg/.

>>9404051
OH MAN YOU ARE REALLY SMART AND I LIKE YOU ALOT, YOU KNOW ME SO WELL!

I had some bugs and I'm a little less hungry but I'm still a little hungry and now the bag is empty and I need to get out of this cave-jerk so club can make more food for me and maybe a wife.

part of this game is that once you create a character you can move to and from it freely, just reply to a certain character's last action or specify the specific character you are speaking to.

>>9404179

Could you clarify that please? As in, we're allowed more than one character in total?

Also, yes let's grab the club and feel our way to a wall. So we can follow wall. Wall must lead to door, naturally!

Well let's look outside then.

>>9404201
In one post you can either create a new character or give a command to any existing character. But you can only command or create one character per post. Except for the odd situations of a group-character-thing, which nobody has made yet, if anyone joins up with your character the two become a group character, you can address however many characters in the same group in the same post.

If you make a character, even in the same universe as a preexisting character, you cannot command any character that turn, as it is being spent on creation.

Also I'll get right on that command :D

>>9404201
IS THIS DOOR, IT IS MAKING A THREATSOUND, I THINK IT WANTS TO STOP ME FROM GETTING OUT.

>>9404394
CLUB DOOR IN SNOUT

>>9403454
it is a compulsion. Very tragic. The shrink says he might be able to treat it with therapy.

Yell a war cry to show it you're not afraid!

>>9404394
Kiss door, try and make friends. Door good.

>>9404464
>>9404426
YEAH, I'LL SHOW HIM, I AM NOT AFRAID OF ANYTHING, I'LL SHOW THIS STUPID DOOR HOW TOUGH I AM.

"STUPID DOOR, YOU LET ME OUT RIGHT, NOW"

>>9404493
He isn't kissing me back :c

I DON'T THINK HE WANTS TO BE FRIENDS ANYMORE, OR DO ANYTHING :v

>>9404575
NO WE EAT STUPID DOOR.

>>9404575

Continue hitting it until it stops moving!

Then drag it along with you out. This creature is valuable.

...nobody? Really?

"FOUL DOOR! I'LL NOT BE SO CRUELLY TAUNTED BY SUCH AN ENCHANTMENT!"

>>9404575
>>Caveman bearkill
Good, now eat it, you were hungry and you can use the pelt as a nice coat.

>>9404449
Man, no can do, mom says I can't leave the house with my, *erm*, conditions.

She's always been afraid of what people will think of them, and quite frankly, I am too, it's just for all these years she's been telling me how horrible people are, I guess if I had to psychoanalyze myself, that's probably why I feel the need to make them miserable.

>>9404629
>>9404647
>>9404669
>>9404682
I WILL EAT SOME NOW AND TAKE THE MAGICAL DOORFOODFRIEND WITH ME :D

OH MAN SO WHAT SHOULD WE DO NOW? :DDDDD

>>9404292
Cool.
How about a dwarf
On a submarine
On a quest to kill a lovecraftian sea monster.

>>9404846
AW MAN WHO IS THIS?

IT LOOKS PRETTY LIKE A WIFE

WHO IS IT?

>>9404904 (okay, sounds fun, I'm on it)

>>9404977
Rape wife.
If unsuccessful, bribe wife with doorfood.

>>9405012
>>9405012
If unsuccessful, hit wife with door and rape wife.

A very hungary zombie.

Looking for love.

>>9405012
NO. WOMAN LIKE MAN WHO SUBTLE.

WE GRAB HER UNDERARM AND SAY "YOU MINE NOW."

WOMAN LIKE SUCH SWEET TALK.

>>9404726
Well then Mr. Troll, it seems that you should do your biggest trolling yet.

We're going to visit the Pope and pronounce ourselves as the anti-christ.

I don't know what to think anymore, the fear, the panic, I'm doing all I can to block everything out.

The rest of them all went mad, I'm the only one who remains, which I suppose is ironic, after all, I was the one who started this who expedition.

All I can do no is dive straight ahead, dive into the maw of entanglement, dive into the abyss that gave us all life and now threatens to take it all back.

Am I going there to die?

Am I going there to return to master?

Maybe I should just die now, I'm getting tired of fighting it, it's all so pointless.

If I can't beat him, shall I join him?

>>9405083 (I'll get on it after the caveman command)

>>9405257
Christ I'm so forgetful with pictures

>>9405257
We do this the Dwarf way.

Throw everything you have at the beastie before worrying about death. We have any missiles? Something we can use to try to harm it?

>>9405012
>>9405023
>>9405202

OKAY, I WILL MAKE HER WIFE AND HAVE LOTS OF KIDS AND BE HAPPY FOREVER

"HEY, YOU MINE NOW, IF NOT THEN I SHOW YOU THE DOOR AND RAPE YOU"

Wife: "OH FUCK NO, I'VE GONE THROUGH TOO MUCH TIME TRAVEL BULLSHIT AT THE HANDS OF MY FORMER ASSHOLE OF A MASTER TO GET -RAPED- BY SOME GOD-DAMNED NEANDERTHAL"

"AUUUUGH WHAT YOU DO?!"

GUYS I FEEL FUZZY I FEEL FUZZY I DON'T LIKE FUZZY IM TIRED AGAIN.

I'm... tired. agai-

>>9405550
NOOOOOO!

CAVEMAN!

>>9405550
Play dead. Take pretty stick from lady.
Rape lady again.

>>9405223
>>9405334

Dorf: "Yeah, that's right, we can still do this, WE WILL DO THIS"

Oh dear lord I'm talking to myself aren't I.

Troll: I like the way you think... I like it alot. But now we gotta start thinkin smaller, how do we get out, how do we get to the pope, what do we do after we tell him.

OH MY GOD THOUGH THIS IS GONNA BE SO MUCH FUN.

>>9405584
>>9405637

I feel like dream but I don't.

What is this place, I don't like it much.

ALL I WANTED WAS WIFE AND NOW I AM IN PLACE.

"CAN ANYONE HEAR ME? I AM IN PLACE HERE AND I DON'T LIKE IT, WHY AM I HERE, LET ME OUT, THIS CAVE IS STUPID, SHOW ME THE DOOR SO I CAN HIT IT."

>>9405083
trust me you are being taken care of

>>9405815
Oh. Huh. I guess this is the door.

Actually, I don't really feel like killing it, I don't even think I can...

I lost my club when I died.

>>9405984
Caveman never died, was cursed.
Fail quest.

>>9406080
Don't complain if you are just gonna let him stare at the door all day.

man guys I'm hungry brb.

Shoot, guy, you should open the door. Like, with your hands, regularlike. Grab the knob and twist it (or pull it, one of these should work).

>>9406488
"This place."

"Oh my."

"Why have I been brought here?"


Why did she send me here?
I only loved her.

>>9406982
Caveman. There is only one thing you can do. The desire that has rested in man's heart, that rests in your heart.

Fuck the stars themselves.

"Wha- What do you even want from me?"

>>YOU ARE MINE NOW, AND I WILL DECIDE WHAT TO DO WITH YOU SOON ENOUGH.

"Who are you?!"

>>QUIET SLAVE, YOU SHALL NOT QUESTION THE MYSTERIES OF THE BLOOD BEAST.

"...whatever will become of me?"

>>YOU WILL BE RETURNED TO THE MATERIAL PLANE, AND THERE YOU WILL SOW THE SEEDS OF MY GREAT AND TERRIBLE ENIGMA.

>>YOU WILL BE RETURNED TO A SEMBLANCE OF LIFE TO SPREAD MY WONDROUS CURSE.

You now realize you are the most powerful being in any universe. Proceed to never change anything about yourself ever and not listen to anyone else.

>>9407296

>>9407296
>>9405834

See, I told you I had that shit down.

>>9407296
What is your enigma?

What is an enigma?

Can I eat it?

>>9405758
Dwarf: Get to arming up, then! Let's make this baby a force to be reckoned with.
Troll: Well can't you get out through a window? We'll work our way from there.

>>9407324
The beast imparted knowledge into me, this enigma is a genetic virus of sorts, one to be imparted into the future generations when I sow my seed into their creation.

Being aware that you do not know this suddenly makes me suspect you are not truly a part of me and I am suddenly quite curious as to the nature of your identity.

I think I still trust you, you always have had good intentions, so I suppose the best thing to do would be to continue turning to you for guidance.

What am I to do when I return to the material plane?

>>9407438
Well I guess we better find someone to sow this seed into, then. Boss man will probably smite us if we don't.

What's the virus do?

Hey you broke da rules but I'm letting it slide cause IDGaF
>>9407362

Dorf: Weapons can be a complicated thing, see, to even get to the wretched blood beast, first I need to get to where he lives, and this here sanguine trench from where life first came is the only permanent gate to his little extraplanar house.

The way I see it, I'mma use 50% of my remaining power for the trip there, and the other 50% to kill the fucker.

"HAVE I THE COURAGE, HAVE I THE FORTITUDE TO SET OFF?"

>>9407480

He never told me exactly, but I think it makes the future generations kind of like how the beast made me.

>>9408052
man I hate when I forget pictures.

>>9407362

Weird, my window is missing it's padlock.

Okay, well, I guess I'm out of here.