Put on your robe and wizard hat

Wotz I got in me pack?

AGGRESS WITH EXTREME PREJUDICE

WHAT DID YOU DO TO SLICKTAU?

HE NEVER SHOWS UP ANYMORE!

>>9255765

You already have your >Cultist Robes and >Cultist Hood equipped, which took like 4 weeks to make out bedsheets, why would you take them off?

that's a silly idea

Finding black bedsheets was really, really hard

(wow, /tg/ is moving quickly)

Masturbate furiously.

>>9255828
Well, letz try da WHEEL OF HERESY!

>>9255777

You open your >inventory

Doesn't look too promising.

That noise is still really irritating. You wish you'd made your hood thicker.

Get Up and Prevaricate!

>>9255858
Turn off our (black, spiky, evil-infused) alarm clock, then.

JERK IT

Let's get some good old fashioned violence going on and take a lead pipe or a socket wrench to whatever woke us uo.

lets inspect the bed for sheets to thicken our hood

>>9255841

You masturbate furiously.

The noise is kind of irritating but otherwise it's ok.

Try to arc cum into mouth from masturbation.

>>9255858
INVESTIGATE NOISE.

>Inspect sound.

>>9255920
>>9255913
>>9255885
Investigate sound and then violence the hell out of it. Tech it to wake us up.

>>9255889
this then inspect our room

>>9255889
>>9255871

You sit up in bed and prevaricate a little. You feel a little better after masturbating.

You clear your head a bit. The noise sounds like an alarm. You appear to be in some sort of dormitory.

On the wall are some >posters and a >calender

Below is your >imperial sanctioned trunk

>Inventory
>Inspect
>Aggress
>Wheel of Heresy
>Exit (no exits visible)
>Prevaricate

>>9255901
God damn. That cultist is happy as hell.

Also,

USE PILLOW on EARS

SLEEP

>>9255949
Check behind poster

>>9255949
>Inspect trunk

>>9255949
Masturbate on wheel of heresy.

>>9255949
WHEEL OF HERESY
WHEEL OF HERESY

>>9255949

Look under bed. Then behind poster.

Deface trunk, of course.
FHOOR KAYOSS!

>>9255966

You check behind the poster. It's an Insane Harlquin Posse poster. You fucking love those guys. Eldritch all up in this bitch.

Behind the poster is your meager >porno collection

You hid it from Commissar Steelshanks. You'd be fucked if he found it.

The alarm is still ringing.

>>9256017
Masturbate on poster.

check our calender!

>>9256017
Add
>porno collection
to inventory

>>9255984
>>9255972

You open your >Wheel of Heresy

Looks like it's grayed out for now. You attempt to masturbate on it, but seeing as it's a tangential game interface you fail miserably.

>>9256039
Masturbate to work out the frustration.

>>9256039
Pull out keys and shoot trunk.

>>9256039

Is there any way we can leave the room then?

Anything under the bed?

>>9256029
this then check trunk

>>9256052
Where's our porn stash?

THIS THREAD
DRAWFAGGING
GOLDEN POTENTIAL
YOU
MUST
FINISH
IT

f5f5f5f5f5 already

>>9256033

You add your porno to your >inventory. It's Imperial Sanctioned Sister Posterior. It's 30 pages of the Sororitas looking disapprovingly at you. It doesn't seem to fill your >dirty porno meter

>>9256019

Your dick is a bit sore right now.

>Commissar Steelshanks
Oh dear...

>>9256113
FUCKING MASTURBATE ANYWAY

>>9256113
>commit heresy

>>9256113
Deface sanctioned trunk.
That counts as KAY-OSS, right?

>>9256113
DO SOME WORSHIPING OF THE CHAOS GODS ALREADY! MAKE US IMMORTAL POWERS OF CHAOS!

>>9256074

Come on, open the trukn already. Then find a way to get out of this room.

Investigate calender

>>9256074
>>9256054

You open your trunk, resisting the urge to deface or masturbate on it. Later.

It contains your >imperial guardsman vestemant, which you took off when you went to bed last night. You would never consider donning it again.

Wait a minute...

>>9256172
FAP ALL OVER IT

>>9256172
Oh well, shut the trunk and investigate calender.

>>9256172
We're not a real cultist at all! We're just a guardsman with delusions of heresy!

>>9256176
ENOUGH WITH THE FAPPING ALREADY

>>9256172
Masturbate on it to show your indifference to the Imperium.

>>9256172
Put guard vestments on OVER robe. Leave room. Wander around. Try and find Commissar Steelshanks. See if anyone notices.

>>9256172

Keep digging around the trunk for anything of use, then investigate that god damn shrieking alarm type noise.

>>9256193
NO
FOR SLAANESH!

Oh fucking dammit.
Dress in the uniform.
Go continue with your duties.
Take any Heretical measures you can get away with.

>>9256172
DEFACE THE ARMOR! USE IT TO STRIKE DOWN YOUR BROTHERS! KILL THEM ALL!

>>9256172
Masturbate insightfully.

>>9256202
THIIIIIIS

>>9256139
>>9256136
>>9256128

You work up your resolve and moneyshot the imperial eagle. Success!

Your BLASPHEMOUS RESOLVE rises by 0.01

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>>9256230
Yesssssssssssssssssssssssss.

Rub sororitas disapproving magazine face in it to show them what for.

>>9256230
I love how disgruntled the skull looks.

>>9256234
Indeed.

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>>9256230
9,999 more times to go

>>9256263
Welp, best get to work!

>>9256029
seconded.

Perhaps it's heresyturday.

Investigate source of shrieking sound.

Check the jizz soaked lockbox. Must be something useful there...

>>9256213

Hell no! you're a warrior of CHAOS now!

Besides, nobody seems to be around.

>>9256204

You look around the room. You are your dormitorium. There are many bunks here. There is an alarm on the cieling, probably what is causing the noise.

There is an exit to the East.

>Inventory
>Inspect
>Aggress
>Wheel of Heresy
>Exit (no exits visible)
>Prevaricate

>>9256298
EXIT the DORM

dickslap sororitas face.
leave east.

>>9256298
Wear armor, set about defacing it later when we get tools, we need the protection... look for spikes to attach

>>9256298
investigate everyone else's things its okay if they find out we'll just kill them

>>9256262
quest/drawthread = win

>>9256298

how do the people on the top and middle bunks access their footlocker?

>>9256362
SILLY. THEIR BUNKS -ARE- THEIR FOOTLOCKERS

>>9256298
>Aggress alarm!
Get some frustration out with some delicious violence!

>>9256029

You check your >calender.

Oh shit!

That's right! Today WAS heresyday!

Holy shit, you must have overslept the heresy!

>>9256385
Go outside and locate some HERESY

>>9256385
Great! Lets go do some heresy even though it's not heresy day, that's even more heretical!

>>9256385

Smack myself across the face for being a stupid idiot and sleeping in, and exit the dorm immediately to partake in any heretical activities.

>>9256385
SHIT
WELL FUCKING HURRY UP AND DO SOMETHING HERETICAL
THE EMPEROR GAVE HIS LIFE SO YOU WOULD BE A SLAVE TO CHAOS AND DARKNESS

>>9256416
Infact, I proclaim today New Heresy day, exit the dorm to go remind everyone.

You must yell that the Emperor is a shitface.

>>9256418
>>9256416
>>9256414
>>9256419
/tg/, your inner cultist is showing.

Screw it, lets just masturbate while crying out to Slanesh. Maybe he'll send down some daemonettes and we'll finally get some.

>>9256439

this

>>9256418
>>9256419

FUCK MAN!

AFTER ALL THAT PLANNING AND SHIT!

Despite your low >acumen and >sex appeal, you feel strangely encouraged to go anyway. It's almost like there are voices in your head.

>>9256379
You'd love to, but you have no >weapon equipped, and you don't have the time.

>>9256439
Yeah, daemonettes with 12-inch barbed penises.

>>9256439
I concur.

>>9256456
Let's find Commissar Steelshanks and shit in his coffee or something. That oughta be heretical enough to get us some accolades.

>>9256456
JUST GO! AS A POWER OF CHAOS, JUST YELL KHORNES NAME AND CUT YOURSELF A LITTLE. YOU'LL RECIEVE A HELLFIRE BOLTER!

>>9256456

EXIT ROOM
COMMIT HERESY

>>9256456
Voices in your head are extra heretical! You're catching up to the rest of the guys already!

>>9256456

You exit the Dormintorium.

There are exits to the East and North here. There is a >spatter of red on the wall. The alarm seems more distant. Your dick is still sore.

>Inventory
>Inspect
>Aggress
>Wheel of Heresy
>Exit (East, North)
>Prevaricate

>>9256510
>lick
>spatter of red

>>9256456
Masturbate to thoughts of your father while staring into the eyes of the sororitas and get off to the shame.

Fap onto the door handle.
EVIL.

>>9256510
Drawl HERETICAL SYMBOLS on the wall with the SPATTER OF RED

>>9256510
Smear the blood on your robes. You'll look cooler.

Then take the ladder north.

>>9256527

You lick it.

It's tomato ketchohwaitnoit'sblood

>>9256586
now kiss the blood then kiss the wall so people who pass by are like lol wut?

>>9256586
Rub sororitas face into bloodstain then stomp on it.
Feel empowered and heretical

Ignore that shit and move on. Go east.

Knock on the other door then hide behind the door we came in and see if anyone answers

>>9256601
>>9256549


SUCCESS! HERESY!

>>9256655
>>9256531
>>9256549

The voices in your head seem conflicted. Should you take the hatch >North or exit >East?

You have just noticed the door behind you was almost torn off its hatches. The alarm seems to be ringing stronger to the >East.

Why aren't we indiscriminately killing? move east!

>>9256690
EEEEAST

>>9256690
>East

>>9256690
rip door of hinges acquire tower shield

>>9256690

east

>>9256690
FUCKING AWESOME!

Also, GO NORTH! UP IS ALWAYS GOOD! ALWAYS!

>>9256713

Your >Brawn isn't strong enough to even rip the door further off its hinges.

>>9256725
>>9256707

you exit into a small room. There is a ladder going >North and >South. An iron door stands to your >East. There is a breath of wind from the >North Exit.

You feel a little uneasy.

>>9256806
South

>>9256806
Fap.

>>9256806
Go
>South

>>9256806
Apply more blood to your robe and venture south!

>>9256806
GO SOUTH! FIND GUNS AND ARMOR! FOR CHAOS!

>>9256806

look north and south

>>9256862
>>9256859
>>9256840

You peer down the >South exit down the hatch.

Oh jeez. Err, FOR CHAOS!

That looks like a thick hatch though. You can hear the dull sounds of combat behind it. Your asshole clenches a little.

You'd need some kind of ridiculously high >brawn explosives to get through that hatch, by the looks of it.

>>9256925

is that an arm?

GET YE ARM

>>9256925
Try and take hand, use it for a weapon

>>9256925
Pull >Arm off.

Equip >Arm as a weapon.

Go >East.

>>9256925
Get the hand. Leave Up and out.

>>9256925

Brawn OR explosives.

Not too quickly now. The giddy rush of defacing the imperial eagle has gotten to your head.

Rip arm off, use as a brush to write heresy on walls.

Get Hand.
Leave upwards and out.

>>9256925
>Retrieve arm from hatch
>Pose as a HERETIC

>>9256957
>>9256963
EQUIP ARM AS CLUB! PEEK UP NORTH TO SEE WHAT OUTSIDE IS LIKE!! THEN GO EAST! FOR CHAOS!!

>>9256983
OH OH OH I SECOND THIS IDEA!

>>9256969
>>9256963

You >equip the ARM OF TREACHERY

>>9257084
USE
>ARM OF TREACHERY
BASH OPEN
>HATCH

>>9257084
INSPECT >Arm of Treachery

I MUST KNOW THE STATS!

>>9257084

go north

>>9257084

It becomes actively >Equipped (red) in your Inventory

Find enough blood to write "motherfucker" under bad.

>>9257118

You exit >East

You come into a small, armored room. The door gives surprisingly easily, looks like the lock was bashed.

There is a large >crate on the floor.

There is a large padlocked > locker on the wall, and another empty one.

There is a poster of that douche Lanzarius Modum, the chapter master of the White Eagle space marines stationed nearby. Fuck those guys.

>Inventory
>Inspect
>Aggress
>Wheel of Heresy
>Exit (no exits visible)
>Prevaricate

>>9257139
Inspect >Poster

Smear the word "shield" and replace with "cock"

>>9257139
OUR DICK IS NO LONGER SORE

MASTURBATE LIKE THE FIST OF THE NORTH STAR

All over that "white" eagle's face.

>>9257139
Show that douche Lanzarius who's boss with the ARM OF TREACHERY.

Douche.

>>9257139
Use blood from arm to draw silly moustache on marine's face.

>>9257166
THIS!

Put a hitler mustache on the emprah

>>9257139
>inspect CRATE
>jerk off on SPEHS MAROON

>>9257153

Yes. This pleases you.

Your >Blasphemous Resolve rises by 0.00033 points

USE ARM OF TREACHERY TO MASTURBATE

I say we >Open crate

>>9257220
Use HERESY and your trusy Arm to grab some sweet loot from the locker.

Oh man, that loot is gonna be so sweet.

>>9257220
FUCK YES!

Now whatever, kick the locker or something. Then let's look for some shit to deface.

>>9257220
>smugcultist.jpg

Inspect crate and locked locker.

>>9257184

You bash the crate open with your >Arm of TREACHERY

it gives easily.

Bingo.

>>9257317
>Inspect
>Item

>>9257317
What's in it, faggot?

>>9257317
OH AWESOME!
Go >Weest
Use >Grenade on >Hatch

>>9257317
Take all of the explosives.

>>9257233
>>9257174
>>9257160

Your >Dick Soreness has gone down to .3

Using the >Arm of TREACHERY, you leave a little surprise for that fucking smug douche before you leave

>>9257415
Return to the hatch and show it who's boss. With your penis.

I think we should masturbate to the point where we can get instantaneous hardons, unlimited masturbation, and devote ourselves to Slaanesh.

Also, multiple penises.

>>9257453
>>9257351
>>9257350

You might as well make sure you get the hatch open.

You use >Big Ol' Crate of Grenades on the >Hatch

>>9257504
Keep one for Khorne

>>9257504
FIRE IN THE HOLE!

FUCK YES!

>>9257504
Stand just far enough away from the hatch so that you can masturbate into the explosion.

>>9257521
>>9257529

You attempt to masturbate into the explos-


You are flung violently downwards by the blast.

You are in a long, hollow corridor. There is an open exit to the >West, the door torn off its hinges. There are >signs of fighting here.

It's very quiet.

>Inventory
>Inspect
>Aggress
>Wheel of Heresy
>Exit (West, North)
>Prevaricate

>>9257598
>Inspect
>Signs of fighting

Put some blood in the wheel of heresy.

Rip out girls skull and put dick in eye socket.

>>9257598
Use >Piss on >Guardsmen

>Steal his >Gun

Rub >Blood on >Cultist Robes

>>9257598
Spin the Wheel of Heresy

>>9257598
Wheel of Heresy, turn turn turn, tell us the lesson that we should learn! Oh, and steal a gun.

>Dance

Why haven't you done this yet? >>9257128

>>9257650
>>9257641
>>9257620

The Wheel of Heresy appears to be inactive right now.

You creep >West.

It's unnervingly quiet. Even the alarm has stopped. You come into the Mess Hall.

There are numerous >bodies here. There are signs of fighting. There is a >portrait on the wall. There is >half finished food on the tables.

There is a >strange beeping sound coming from one of the cultist's corpses.

There is an exit to the West

>Inventory
>Inspect
>Aggress
>Wheel of Heresy
>Exit (West)
>Prevaricate

>>9257730
Masturbate on >bodies

Is that Commissar Steelshank's picture? Maybe we should have saved up the jizz for this one.

>>9257730
Take a shit.

Smear >Shit on >Picture of Commissar.

Smear a Sign of Chaos on the wall.
Remember, eight points, not six.

>>9257776
This on the Commissar's pict.

>>9257730
Draw a blood moustache on the Commisar's portrait then find a REAL FUCKING GUN, FOR CHAOS!

>>9257730
Write "Slut!" on the poster with an arrow pointing to the commisar.

>>9257757
>>9257801
>>9257741

You try and deface the Commissar's portrait but man, that steely glare. It's going right through you. Holy shit that guy's glare can pierce concrete.

Your dick softness increases by 5

>>9257820
Do it anyway. Fuck 'im.

>>9257822
Take a moment of silence for your fallen Cultist brothers. Then use the dead chick's body to cum on EVERYTHING.

>>9257822
:/

Then grab the >Knife from the wall and head >west

>>9257730
>There is a strange beeping sound coming from one of the cultist's corpses.
Check this out.
NOW.

>>9257822
Close eyes and pretend he's not looking while you draw the sign.

>>9257822

Check if there are functioning weapons you can use.

>>9257846
>>9257885

You go to >loot one of the dead bodies andholyshithesalive

A growl rolls past his bloodied lips as he unsteadily rises to his feet.

"TRAITOROUS... SCUM!"

You have been AMBUSHED!

Roll a d6

rolled 5 = 5

>>9257937

rolled 1 = 1

>>9257937

rolled 1 = 1

Whats with the ones you fags? Dont you niggers know how to roll a dice?

rolled 4 = 4

BASH HIM WITH THE ARM OF TREACHERY THEN KICK HIM FOR CHAOS!!

>>9257937
>>9257937
HIT HIM WITH YOUR CLUB!

>>9257974
nice try broseph

>>9257953
>>9257953

You take the upper hand!

no pun intended!

Actions?

>>9258007
SMACK THAT FUCKER IN THE HEAD WITH THE ARM OF TREACHERY

>>9258007

HIT HIM!

>>9258007
OVERHEAD SWING!

rolled 2 = 2

>>9258007
USE SPLASH ATTACK

>>9257937
rape him for slannesh, then shit on him for nurgle, cause his lungs to change to gills for tzeentch then RIP OFF HIS SKULL

>>9258007

Kick him back down, then beat him savagely with the Arm. Laugh maniacally while doing so.

If it's enough to kill him, finish him off by ripping out his throat with our teeth.

>>9258007

CRAM IT UP HIS ARSE

>>9258007
BREAK HIS ARMS AND FUCK HIS WOUNDS! SKULLS FOR THE SKULL THRONE!

>>9258007
>Aggress!
LEVEL ONE THREE-ARMED ORAORAORA

>consensual sex

rolled 2 = 2

>>9258025
dice for it

>Agress
Go for the eye jab with your ARM OF TREACHERY.

>>9258027
>>9258036
>>9258014

THE TIME IS NIGH! FOR CHAOS!

You perform DEAD MAN'S HAND!

You deal 1 point of damage to the WOUNDED GUARDSMAN

The Wounded guardsman Perishes!

Masturbate on his body.

>>9258093
POSE LIKE A BADASS MOTHERFUCKER 'COS SHIT JUST GOT REAL.

>>9258093
FUCK HIS EYESOCKETS
FOR SLANEESH!

>>9258093
HOLY SHIT THIS IS FUCKING AWESOME!

Loot his >corpse

And pull the >Knife from the wall.

>>9258093

Fuck masturbation, this was glorious combat. Rip off his head, carry it with us with intent to clean later.

Also, feast on his throat. We haven't even had breakfast yet, come on, we gotta eat it for energy, guys.

Fap onto his corpse.

>>9258155
>>9258110
This

>>9258093
Check Guardsman's body for what he was going to attack us with. Celebration comes afterwards.

>>9258093
>>9258112
>>9258162

You have slain the guardsman!

You recieve 1 blasphemy orb!

A strange energy courses through you...

The guardsman appeared to have no weapons. However he did have 1 >dirty porno, a >full bottle and some >good cigs, a couple of >grisly trophies, and a >strange playing card.

You may only pick one. Choose wisely.

>>9258201
>INSPECT
>DIRTY PORNO
>MASTURBATE

>>9258201
No shit, pr0n.

>>9258127
Not to change the subject, but 'na na na' is always in doom rider stuff, what tune is that to?

>>9258201
PPPPOOOOORN

>>9258201
Take the strange playing card and masturbate to it.

>>9258201
The porn.

>>9258201
Trophy! Use it to make into a scary icon to fasten on your robe! It will lower the stats of nearby enemies!

>>9258201

Take the full bottle.

Playing card.

rolled 4 = 4

>>9258201
THE STRANGE CARD! IT IS CLEARLY THE SPINNER FOR WHEEL OF HERESY! CHOOSE THE CARD FOR CHAOS!!

PORN
OUR FAPPING IS MAXIMUM

LOOK AT OUR WHEEL OF HERESY!

Strange Playing Card for Tzeentch!

Grab the porno. Then use it to help fap onto his dead body.
Make sure to cry out to Slanesh as you do it.

>>9258237
>>9258215
>>9258229

Are you sure?

This choice will have great effect on your future path of EVIL

>>9258268
Use the PORN!

THE PLAYING CARD YOU FAGS

TZEENTCH
CARD
FUCKER
NO WAIT
MALAL
MALAL
DESTROY ALL OF THEM
FOR MALAL

>>9258268
Porn! Porn! Slaanesh demands it!

>>9258268
YES
WE HAVE FAPPED TOO MUCH TO STOP NAO

>>9258268
CARD

>>9258268

No, no porn! The bottle, man, we need booze! BOOOOOOOOOOZE!

>>9258268
I'VE NEVER BEEN MORE SURE ABOUT ANYTHING IN MY DAMN LIFE

>>9258268
;_;

NOOO GETS THE TROPHY! IT CAN HELP IN COMBAT!

Playing card! I wanna be a sorcerer and get eaten by my own summoned demon one day!

>>9258279
>Destroy them all
>Malal
This. Fucking this. Best choice.
MALAL FOR FUCKS SAKE

>>9258268
The porn ensures the ease of masturbatory acts.
We need it.
We masturbate a LOT.

>>9258279
OH YEAH
DESTROY ALL OF THEM
FOR MALAL

SECONDING DESTRUCTION

>>9258268
PORN PORN PORN PORN PORN

DESTROY
CRUSH ALL THE CHAOS GODS
FOR MALICE

GOD DAMMIT WE WANT THE CARD
THEY MIGHT UNLEASH GIFTS UPON US

DESTROY ALL 4.

MALAL SEES YOU ONE
HE CRUSHES YOU ALL
VOTE FOR MALAL
THE GREATER EVIL
ALSO MORE TARGETS

CARDDDDDDDDDDDD

>>9258268
CARD

FUCK SLAANESH

I think malal is best
destroy them all

FFFF PORN THE PORN TAKE THE PORN YOU FANCY FUCKERS

MALAL FOR NON-LINEARITY AND SCREWING WITH THE DRAWFAG
ALSO THE BEST CHAOS GOD
MALAL

PORN
WE CALLED IT FIRST
FUCK THE REST OF YOU

DESTROY THE TROPHIES!

FOR CHAOS!

Destruction.
Malal sees what you did and he likes it.
So yeah, destroy that shit.

FOR THE CUM GOD.

Malal.
The thinking-outside-of-the-box choice.

Way to go OP. Now you got a fight over who the best God of Chaos is.
Also porn. Daemonettes greatly ensure our chances of getting laid before we die.

DESTRUCTION FOR CHAOSSSSSSSS!

>>9258275
>>9258306
>>9258300

A STRANGE ENERGY SUFFUSES YOU

YOU ARE BESET BY A SEATED FIGURE. YOUR DICK HARDNESS INCREASES BY 50

(Malal would have been awesome but... just wait)

Malaaaaaaaaaal

>>9258369
YESSSSS

We're clearly destined to be a disciple of slaanesh, might as well embrace it and start expanding our pron collection.

>>9258369
SHIT'S ABOUT TO GET REAAAAAAAL

>>9258369
oh lawd

Next thing we know we're gonna have tits and a foot-long dick

>>9258369
YOU BASTARD! YOU HAVE FORSAKEN KHORNE FOR SLAANESH!

>Slaanesh
Fuck this shit.

>>9258391
Where's the problem with that?

>>9258369
God dammit, now we're destined to be a lifeless husk devoid of all feelings and will only get off if we're sticking our dick in a meat grinder.

>>9258391
I approve of increasing our peniscular size.

>>9258407

So pretty much no change.

>>9258405
The thread will devolve into us titfucking ourselves, that's what.

>>9258397
What else did you expect from /tg/?

Now that we worship the WORST CHAOS GOD, we might as well tap DAT DAEMONETTE ASS.

>>9258422
I'm still not seeing the issue.

I'm going to vote for destroying shit 100% of the time just 'cause.
Fuck Slaneesh faggotry.

>>9258369
There's only so far you can go before dick jokes stop being funny.

>>9258369
FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF

BY THE THRONE YOU ARE THE BEST HERESY-INDUCED VISITATION OF PURE EVIL EVER

>>9258431

I'm pretty sure we're the ones who will get tapped by
>12 inch spiky penis

THE FLOATING HEAD OF TIM CURRY APPEARS AND TRANSFIXES YOU WITH A TERRIBLE ENERGY

You have leveled up! You are now a Sniveling Underling.

You have gained 6 sex appeal.

You have gained the Ability Soporific Musk

The wheel of heresy has become active

Destroy the Wheel.
Or try at least.

>>9258461
OH GOD
I DON'T EVEN
HOOOLY SHIT

>>9258369
Fuck. Is this what happens to Chaos cultists?

Because that's fuckloads better than just "faith in the Emperor".

>>9258461
EXPLAIN THE MUSK! EXPLAIN ITS POWERS! ALSO, WE NEED TO FUCKING SEDUCE SOME PEOPLE!

ALSO LET'S LOOK AT THE WHEEL OF HERESY!

>>9258461
>Tim Curry
I KNEW IT

>>9258461
Spin that shit. The Wheel of Heresy IS for spinning, right?

>>9258461

Fucking awesome. And here I was thinking Slaanesh would be the boring path.

>>9258461

You can now expend Blasphemy orbs to gain new abilities in the Wheel of Heresy, and Heresy Spheres to power up existing ones.

The wing of the Blood God is closed to you for the time being.

>inquire as to the specifics of our new abilities.

What is our current sex appeal as well? Or should I assume we started at zero.

>>9258522
Started at 0 (see >>9255858), so we're at 6 now.

>>9258522
Nevermind, we DID start at zero.

SIGH

>>9258514
Cover the wing of the Blood God with blood, just as a polite apology.

MAKE A DEAL

SPIN THE WHEEL?

Needs more Destruction for destructions sake.

I propose in honor of our new god, we fuck something.

FIND SOMETHING TO DICK.

>>9258538
Better than some of our starting stats.

>>9258514
WHY IS THE BLOOD GOD CLOSED?! FUCK!

PUT SOME POINTS INTO NURGLE!

>>9258514
>notice that we can collect more chaos orbs.
AWESOME! ALL THE CHAOS FUSE INSIDE OF US!

>>9258514

Let us spend our blasphemy orb to gain a new skill. Tzeentch or Slaanesh seems like the best choices.

Tear off our dick and start over. Fucking Slaanesh. Also fucking "cum on it" spam.

I propose we go full Slaanshi powers, then Khorne so we can chop a land raider in half with our penis.

>>9258514
GOD DAMMIT I WANTED TO SERVE THE BLOOD GOD

You have become a level 1 Cultist of Slaanesh

You feel sexy.

>>9258603
Suddenly I look much more effeminate, go seduce some Imperial Guardsmen

The fuck? Did we grow woman hips all the sudden?

>>9258603
>rub nipples.

>>9258603
Let's go find some female guardsmen and put our dick in them. Maybe we can get some orbs, and convert some bitches to Chaos!

>>9258603
Proceed to sing "I'm too sexy".

ADJUST APPEARANCE TO MASCULINE SEX APPEAL.

We won't be some daemonettes bitch.

>>9258603
CHECK IF PENIS IS STILL THERE

>>9258635
I like this idea.

I'M...TOO SEXY FOR MY LASGUN
TOO SEXY FOR MY COMMISSAR
TOO SEXY FOR THE EMPRAH

"Sup, Slaanesh?"

>>9258603

TO BE CONTINUED

(thread is autosaging and I have work to do so I will bid you all adieu for now. I will get some more together when I can, most likely for next week. Obviously I need to build some story stuff ahead.

Cheers! Been a good time trying a quest thread)

>>9258658
CHASTITY! ADD ME TO MSN! I WANT TO BE THERE NEXT TIME!

>>9258658
Well played sir.

>>9258658
Any particular dates in mind for the next installment?

>>9258648
too sexy for my flak jacket

HOW DO WE ARCHIVE?

>>9258707
TOO SEXY FOR MY NECKBEARD

>>9258706
Nothing yet but probably late tomorrow or early next week

>>9258730
Archived already.

http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/9255563/