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  • File : 1263870460.jpg-(141 KB, 960x1279, CIMG4503.jpg)
    141 KB Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)22:07 No.7657806  
    It is the 44th millennium. For more than a hundred centuries Emperor Shang-Di has sat immobile on the Jade Throne of Earth. He is the master of mankind by the mandate of heaven, and master of a million worlds by the might of his inexhaustible armies. He is a mummified carcass writhing invisibly with power from the White Age.

    He is the Gaki Lord of the Imperium for whom a thousand souls are sacrificed every day. so that he may never truly die.

    Yet even in his deathless state, the Emperor continues his eternal vigilance.
    Mighty battlefleets cross the youkai-infested miasma of the Existence Consuming Radiance, the only route between distant stars, their way lit by the True Peach Flame, the manifestation of the Emperor's inexhaustible chi.

    Vast armies give battle in his name on uncounted worlds. Greatest amongst his soldiers are the Dragon Masters, the Uchu Hatamoto, bio-engineered super-samurai. Their comrades in arms are legion: the Tiger Guard and countless planetary defense forces, the ever-vigilant Brotherhood of Auspicious Sages and the alchemists of Mitsubishi-Bandai to name only a few. But for all their multitudes, they are barely enough to hold off the ever-present threat from aliens, deviants, mutants and worse.

    To be a man in such times is to be one amongst untold quadrillions. It is to live in the cruelest and most bloody regime imaginable. These are the tales of those times.

    Forget the power of technology and science, for so much has been forgotten, never to be relearned.

    Forget the promise of progress and understanding, for in the blood scarlet future there is only war.

    There is no order amongst the stars.

    Only an eternity of carnage and slaughter, and the laughter of hungry ghosts.
    >> Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)22:08 No.7657822
    Oh, and the tittering of conniving Eunuchs.

    Imperial Warships look like the Space Battleship Yamato had an affair with a pagoda. Dragons and Chrysanthemums replace Two Headed Eagles and Skulls. The Eldar look like anthropomorphic foxes. The Four Outcast Lords of Disorder are The Bronze Parricide, The Dark Daughter, The Magistrate of the Forbidden and the Flesh at Play. The Administration of the empire is obsessed with examination scores. The Sisterhood of the Fallen Mountain temple wield Hadouken in their power armoured fists. The Daoist masters of the Celestial College blinded by the Emperor's wisdom pass messages between the stars. In the shines of the Okami Dragon Masters they prepare for when the mandate of heaven shakes Cao Cao will return to lead them once more. Their Shinigami rivals hunt their fallen brethren across the void. The Rationalist and Legalist factions threaten to tear the Auspicious Brotherhood apart in a Sage War over correct behaviour.
    >> Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)22:08 No.7657828
    SUN TZU TIME?
    >> Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)22:10 No.7657873
    How come the emperor has a Chinese-sounding name and then everything else sounds Japanese?
    >> Thatassholewritefag !!bTfelQViuUO 01/18/10(Mon)22:10 No.7657875
         File1263870642.jpg-(17 KB, 200x250, mongols.jpg)
    17 KB
    WAAAAAAGGGHH!!!!!
    >> Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)22:11 No.7657888
    >>7657875
    OH TITS.
    >> Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)22:11 No.7657894
    Oo, it's cool.
    So, Orks? Tau (really interested in this translation)? Necron?
    >> Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)22:16 No.7657980
         File1263871019.jpg-(28 KB, 300x224, magic_bok_inkeyes_pic2_en.jpg)
    28 KB
    Dark Eldar, represent
    >> Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)22:17 No.7657989
         File1263871046.jpg-(154 KB, 736x556, Destroying_Chinese_war_junks&#(...).jpg)
    154 KB
    >>7657894

    Sleek black ships arrived suddenly with terrible weapons, and decimated an Imperial fleet.
    >> Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)22:18 No.7658005
    >>7657873
    ARE YA CHIKNEES OR JAPANKEES
    >> Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)22:19 No.7658014
    >>7657894

    You know the Tau would would work fairly well if they were Renaissance European sytled.

    A fast developing race, not quite at the level of the Empire, and not yet a concern... but growing stronger and more dangerous by the year.
    >> Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)22:19 No.7658021
    >>7658014
    TAU R ANGLOBOO!
    >> Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)22:20 No.7658035
    >>7658014

    Tau are india

    Caste system anyone?
    >> Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)22:21 No.7658044
    >>7657873

    it all sounds nip to me, chinkee chinaman
    >> Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)22:22 No.7658070
    >>7658014

    This is exactly what I was thinking.
    >> Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)22:23 No.7658071
    >>7658014
    It does work, doesn't it? A bunch of funny talking foreigners coming from a patch of land far smaller than the GROLIOUS EMPIRE, exporting something said Empire considers morally decadent?

    "I do say, Shas La, these Imperials seem rather belligerent, wot?"
    >> Thatassholewritefag !!bTfelQViuUO 01/18/10(Mon)22:23 No.7658073
         File1263871388.jpg-(1.78 MB, 1731x1228, mongols14.jpg)
    1.78 MB
    WEZ HERE FOR DA FOIGHT! WHEREZ DEM CAT BOYZ!
    >> Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)22:23 No.7658074
    >>7658014
    How about the Tau being some weirdass combination of Spanish, French, and Japanese?
    >> Iron Lung 01/18/10(Mon)22:24 No.7658094
    >>The Bronze Parricide, The Dark Daughter, The Magistrate of the Forbidden and the Flesh at Play.

    Khorne (Parricide: brother-killing?), Slaanesh, Tzeentch and Nurgle? Good names.

    And the flavor here is extremely Chinese, not Japanese.
    >> Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)22:25 No.7658120
         File1263871552.jpg-(442 KB, 1524x915, BATTLE.jpg)
    442 KB
    >>7658073
    Nice Armor fagknuckle.
    >> Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)22:26 No.7658130
    >>7657873

    For the same reason trad 40K draws from the history of most European countries.
    >> Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)22:26 No.7658138
    Mirror Mirror was a good episode of star trek.OP obviously agrees.
    >> Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)22:35 No.7658260
    Ok, so The Imperium is China and Japan, the Tau are Victorian Europe, the Kitsune's and (I'm assuming) other mythical animal types like tanuki's and kappa's and whatnot (aspect warriors WOO). Dark Eldar are Nezumis and probably other more evil type japanse monters. Orks are Mongols.

    That leaves Nids and Necrons.
    >> Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)22:38 No.7658302
    >>7658260
    Necrons as those weird hopping chinese vampires.
    >> Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)22:43 No.7658365
    >>7658302

    Now that would be creepy. Machines of death hopping along the battlefield on four out stretched metal arms...

    As for 'Nids... Damn I'm at a loss.
    >> Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)22:43 No.7658374
    Ooooooooooohhhh, I love me some Imperial China.
    >> Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)22:46 No.7658412
    >Emperor Shang-Di
    >youkai-infested
    >Uchu Hatamoto

    Haphazardly mixing up Chinese and Japanese Elements

    ...at least it retains a 1980s feel...
    >> Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)22:47 No.7658439
    >>7658412
    Well, the regular Imperium of Man blends the Spanish Inquisition, German armies, British punks, and Russian officers after all...

    So really, the offense is not including elements liberally taken from Korea, Indochina, and India.
    >> Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)22:51 No.7658497
         File1263873069.png-(3 KB, 209x215, 1257396361446.png)
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    >>7658044
    >> Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)22:56 No.7658602
    >>7658094
    Make the AdMech Japanese.

    It would work so very well with a Chinese Imperium of Man.

    Necrons are the Indus River Valley civilization, mixed with Sumerians and the earliest Chinese types.

    Tau are the Angrezi Raj from the book "The Peshawar Lancers".

    Orks are Mongols.

    Eldar are still Eldar, except they all look like varying types of sub-Saharan African.

    Tyranids are either Russian, American, or some unholy conglomerate of the two.
    >> Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)22:56 No.7658604
         File1263873383.jpg-(86 KB, 489x416, sboxer.jpg)
    86 KB
    >So really, the offense is not including elements liberally taken from Korea, Indochina, and India.
    >Korea

    SLAYERS_'BOXEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEER'!!!!!!!!!
    >> Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)23:01 No.7658689
    >>7658439
    Who gives a fuck about Korea?
    >> Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)23:01 No.7658690
    >>7658302

    I second this motion
    >> Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)23:04 No.7658732
    Remember, of course, that they still need to be aliens. The shift is in their cultural alignment.

    Tau should be Indian-based in their culture; there's a little of that already, but emphasize it.

    Orks are Mongols, as opposed to the Cockney thing they have going now. This means an emphasis on horses (or bikes); replace Gork and Mork with the legendary Genghis WAaaagh.

    Eldar are British. This, by extension, means that Slaanesh is an English whore.

    Necrons as Americans is an interesting idea. Go the Terminator-robot route.

    And if we're doing carapaced monsters fighting asians... CRABS. It's blindingly obvious.
    >> Salamanders Fanbro !kSPBuCJsY6 01/18/10(Mon)23:05 No.7658748
    >mixing Japanese and Chinese
    11/10
    >> Space Thor !bwkR4jXhwk 01/18/10(Mon)23:07 No.7658779
         File1263874035.jpg-(193 KB, 1040x482, Actually-happened.jpg)
    193 KB
    >>7658732
    >And if we're doing carapaced monsters fighting asians... CRABS. It's blindingly obvious.
    >> Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)23:13 No.7658862
         File1263874415.jpg-(89 KB, 336x500, lobstergirl1262643368982.jpg)
    89 KB
    is this the new genestealer?
    >> Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)23:17 No.7658922
    >>7658862
    gentlemen, i think we've been infiltrated
    >> Shas'o R'myr !!TZikiEEr0tg 01/18/10(Mon)23:19 No.7658955
    >>7658732

    Tau riding Elephants with mounted railguns into battle.
    >> Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)23:20 No.7658963
    >>7658732
    No, the Nids will draw their influence from something even more inimical to all human life, Asian or otherwise.

    Australia.
    >> Thatassholewritefag !!bTfelQViuUO 01/18/10(Mon)23:21 No.7658983
    >>7658963
    Even Nids would stay the fuck away from australia.

    The gentlest creature there makes the deadliest Catachan deathwuzzit look like a cute yappy puppy.
    >> Shas'o R'myr !!TZikiEEr0tg 01/18/10(Mon)23:21 No.7658985
    >>7658955

    Which, looking back I find hilarious because when I get some XV-9s, I will make them Indian Auxiliary corps with turbans and sashes.
    >> Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)23:22 No.7658996
    Kroot: vikings?
    >> Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)23:23 No.7659022
    >>7658996
    JAWESOME
    >> Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)23:31 No.7659131
    >>7658983
    No, no.

    In this Imperial Chinese Future, the Nids ARE Australia.
    >> Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)23:33 No.7659155
    >>7659131
    Australia on crabs you mean

    everything is part crab, lobster, or mantis shrimp
    >> Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)23:35 No.7659184
    >>7659155
    Giant isopods.

    Deadly spiders with hardened carapaces.

    Air-breathing varieties of poisonous jellyfish.

    Rippers are now platypi. Including the evolution-on-drugs appearance. And the poisonous spurs.
    >> Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)23:37 No.7659203
         File1263875852.jpg-(118 KB, 800x600, mantis-shrimp-791419.jpg)
    118 KB
    I AM THE NEW CARNIFEX
    >> Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)23:38 No.7659221
    >>7659203

    GAME OVER
    EATING A BULLET NOW.
    >> Thatassholewritefag !!bTfelQViuUO 01/18/10(Mon)23:39 No.7659239
    >>7659203
    HOLY FUCK SOMEONE CALL MOST EXALTED PRINCE CAIN!
    >> Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)23:40 No.7659247
         File1263876016.jpg-(89 KB, 768x506, mantis shrimp Fiji.jpg)
    89 KB
    >> Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)23:41 No.7659270
         File1263876095.jpg-(52 KB, 490x353, mantis_shrimp_2.jpg)
    52 KB
    >> Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)23:42 No.7659275
    >>7659203
    >>7659247
    >>7659270
    i want one.....
    >> Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)23:43 No.7659284
         File1263876182.jpg-(53 KB, 444x600, Mantis_shrimp_from_front.jpg)
    53 KB
    OM NOM NOM NOM NOM
    >> Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)23:43 No.7659296
         File1263876222.jpg-(39 KB, 470x310, mantis-shrimp-newbert-1145622-(...).jpg)
    39 KB
    >> Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)23:44 No.7659302
    >>7659275
    fucker could punch your balls straight up out your mouth...
    >> Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)23:44 No.7659303
    >>7659296
    lay off the food porky!
    >> Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)23:44 No.7659304
         File1263876282.jpg-(53 KB, 490x368, mantis_shrimp_1.jpg)
    53 KB
    >> Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)23:45 No.7659320
         File1263876357.jpg-(9 KB, 365x275, GameOverAliens.jpg)
    9 KB
    GAME OVER MAN, GAME OVER
    >> Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)23:46 No.7659332
         File1263876380.jpg-(19 KB, 741x308, Well I guess that's that.jpg)
    19 KB
    >>7659203
    >> Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)23:47 No.7659356
         File1263876475.jpg-(80 KB, 640x418, mantis shrimp.jpg)
    80 KB
    RAWR
    >> Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)23:49 No.7659379
         File1263876584.jpg-(200 KB, 1600x971, mantis_shrimp_img_2501_p.jpg)
    200 KB
    >> Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)23:50 No.7659389
    >>7659356
    It's like a Doom Lobster or something.

    When the end times come, they will rise from the deep and shatter the works of man with their hammerclaws.
    >> Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)23:52 No.7659413
         File1263876734.jpg-(190 KB, 500x333, mantisshrimptumblr_ks58c4GsYy1(...).jpg)
    190 KB
    >> Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)23:53 No.7659433
    >>7659413

    Good god...its so beautiful...like a rainbow of pure destruction....
    >> Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)23:55 No.7659452
         File1263876933.jpg-(437 KB, 800x541, Mantis_Shrimp_smaher.jpg)
    437 KB
    >> Anonymous 01/18/10(Mon)23:57 No.7659471
         File1263877071.jpg-(113 KB, 640x480, mantis-shrimp.jpg)
    113 KB
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)00:12 No.7659610
    >>7659203
    >>7659247
    >>7659270
    >>7659284
    >>7659296
    >>7659302
    >>7659304
    >>7659356
    >>7659379
    >>7659413
    >>7659452
    >>7659471
    i sense a pattern here... also thread takeover...
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)00:12 No.7659618
    >>7659610
    Well, that is kind of what the Nids do. They devour threads for their biomass.
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)00:14 No.7659634
         File1263878079.jpg-(87 KB, 300x400, mantis_shrimp_4.jpg)
    87 KB
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)00:15 No.7659638
         File1263878115.jpg-(60 KB, 400x314, Mantis+Shrimp.jpg)
    60 KB
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)00:19 No.7659681
         File1263878384.jpg-(32 KB, 500x375, happy-iroh.jpg)
    32 KB
    So, the black ships show up to gather up any unsanctioned Benders, to feed the Golden Throne?
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)00:20 No.7659699
         File1263878459.jpg-(913 KB, 1024x776, mantis_shrimp_8.jpg)
    913 KB
    >>7659681
    OMNOMNOMNOM
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)00:24 No.7659750
    I hate WH40K and all it stands for.

    But I would play the fuck out of this.
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)00:25 No.7659754
    >>7659681
    I'd say that geomantic ritual seems more likely in a Chinese Imperium of Man. The entirety of Holy Terra is arranged in such a pattern that all life and motion on the planet serves to funnel power to the Golden Throne.
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)00:25 No.7659765
    >>7659750
    take cover! We haven't much time before the dreaded beastes strike again!
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)00:29 No.7659815
    >>7659754
    its the Jade Throne

    and you all know you want to play just because of australian mantis shrimp nids
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)00:30 No.7659828
    >>7659815
    id play for any mantis shrimp nigs... spearers or smashers...
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)00:32 No.7659848
         File1263879167.jpg-(120 KB, 500x635, IMPEOS1100_500..jpg)
    120 KB
    >>7659815

    No, I'd play because SPACE WUXIA

    It's like Weapons of the Gods ... IN SPAAAAAACE
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)00:33 No.7659859
         File1263879226.jpg-(107 KB, 500x377, mantis_shrimp_64.jpg)
    107 KB
    MANTIS SHRIMP DEMANDS MORE BIOMASS
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)00:36 No.7659888
         File1263879370.jpg-(213 KB, 600x800, 1224682322152.jpg)
    213 KB
    IN THE NAME OF THE DRAGON EMPEROR, BELOVED OF HEAVEN AND EARTH!
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)00:36 No.7659893
    and then there was a warpstorm so bad that is crossed the boundries of the universe, linking WH40k to this (MeteorHammer 40,000?)
    >> LogicNinja !AZlS3./ex. 01/19/10(Tue)00:37 No.7659910
    >>7659848
    Weapons of the Gods would not be made more awesome by being in space.
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)00:38 No.7659920
         File1263879501.jpg-(52 KB, 400x342, mantis_shrimp_96.jpg)
    52 KB
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)00:38 No.7659929
    >>7659910
    It helps that it's basically impossible to make weapons of the gods more awesome.
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)00:39 No.7659943
         File1263879575.jpg-(164 KB, 534x533, 1253502914177.jpg)
    164 KB
    >>7659910

    Two great tastes that taste great together?

    (like kung fu and mecha?)
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)00:39 No.7659946
    WUXIA 40K? MANTIS SHRIMP?

    FUCKING AWESOME

    Meteorhammer 40,000k seems like a good name
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)00:40 No.7659950
    >>7659893
    Meteorhammer 40K?
    ...Meteorhammer 40K!
    >> LogicNinja !AZlS3./ex. 01/19/10(Tue)00:41 No.7659965
    >>7659929
    Indeed.

    >>7659943
    Not at all. Space, with its weightlessness, would render Wuxia walking-on-air stuff moot.
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)00:41 No.7659966
    gentlemen, we have work to do

    we must make this playable!
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)00:41 No.7659975
    >>7659965
    like that would stop 40k
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)00:41 No.7659977
    >>7659888
    How dare you, commoner, to use the visage of the Noble Yuans!!
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)00:42 No.7659980
         File1263879721.jpg-(382 KB, 1920x1200, 1228378964413.jpg)
    382 KB
    Perhaps the Great Sage, Equal to Heaven, is something like the heretic Horus ... ? (non-WH40Kguy here).
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)00:42 No.7659994
    >>7659980
    no, he's either Cypher or Eldrad.
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)00:43 No.7659997
    >>7659859
    I'd do what the crustacean says. These fuckers can produce sonic boom punches. Can you do that? They will fuck you up!
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)00:43 No.7660006
    >>7659980
    well there was that one dynasty that was LOLEVILBAD in chinese history, could steal from that to make the chaos equivlent
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)00:43 No.7660011
    >>7657822
    >Flesh at Play

    Let's make that "The Flesh That Hates."
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)00:46 No.7660039
    find a big enemy from Journey to the West, there is your Horus
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)00:46 No.7660044
         File1263879986.jpg-(163 KB, 600x850, Mitsuhide.jpg)
    163 KB
    I got your Horus the Betrayer-type material right here

    Ablest among generals? check
    Admired among many? Betcha
    Conquered many lands in his lord's name? Sure
    Betrayer!? True
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)00:46 No.7660045
         File1263879991.jpg-(336 KB, 1200x1010, 1231628164774.jpg)
    336 KB
    Tainted? No, I simply hear the song of the Void in my heart, finally. It maddened my dreams, but now it offers ... serenity. Let me play it for you ...
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)00:46 No.7660046
    >>7660039
    or invert it and there is your chaos
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)00:46 No.7660047
    >>7659965
    They just spacewalk instead.

    Also, if you want to do similar physics-is-my-bitch shit, have them kick off against the fabric of space-time in order to change speed and direction.
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)00:47 No.7660058
    >>7660006
    Also, there was Mao Zedong.
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)00:47 No.7660060
         File1263880066.jpg-(221 KB, 600x800, a-lubu.jpg)
    221 KB
    >>7659980
    No, Sun Wukong is Leman Russ.

    This is Horus.
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)00:49 No.7660077
    This... this is the best thing ever.
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)00:49 No.7660083
    >>7660060
    One of the greatest warriors of his era? Check.
    Seduced by a dark power (lol Diao Chan) to commit betrayal? Check.
    Betrayed and killed his father? Check.
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)00:51 No.7660106
         File1263880283.jpg-(344 KB, 1280x1024, mantis_shrimp_eyes2.jpg)
    344 KB
    MANTIS SHRIMP HAS ARCHIVED THREAD FOR FUTURE BIOMASS
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)00:51 No.7660110
         File1263880289.jpg-(50 KB, 360x239, JetLiBeckons.jpg)
    50 KB
    Then who is Wong Fei Hung?

    He is THE MAN.
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)00:52 No.7660117
    >>7660110
    Fuck I love that movie
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)00:52 No.7660125
    >>7660083
    He was a dumbass though
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)00:54 No.7660151
    >>7660125
    So perfect parallel then?
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)00:57 No.7660177
    Hmm. Who gets to be Magnus?
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)00:57 No.7660186
    Not to change the subject, but anyone play any Asian-flavored MMORPGs?

    I'd ask /v/, but ... they're /v/.

    I've played World of Kung Fu since Beta. It's ... meh.
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)01:03 No.7660265
    MONGOL ORKS

    possibly with more squigs
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)01:09 No.7660366
         File1263881386.jpg-(163 KB, 377x398, confucius.jpg)
    163 KB
    Here's the thing:

    This idea is awesome, but it's not necessarily an alternate 40k. The Galaxy is fuckhuge, and has a million different cultures. There's probably an entire feudal Chinese subsector with trillions of inhabitants. They see the universe as the OP described.

    They probably produce a lot of arbiters and adepts. At least, that's my Arbiter's backstory, and why he keeps brutally enforcing proper respect for the five filial relationships.
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)01:13 No.7660411
    >>7660265
    Squigs are... hmm, various other Central Asian tribes maybe? Uighurs, Kazakhs, Uzbeks, etc.

    And the Kroot are Thai, Vietnamese and Malayan.

    The Tau castes, well: Ethereals are Brits, Fire Caste are Sikhs and Gurkhas, Water Caste are Afghans, Air Caste are Bengali/Bihari, and Earth Caste are Dravidian.
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)01:16 No.7660451
    >>7660411
    ...Thai Kroot?
    Why does that make them so much more awesome?
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)01:17 No.7660481
    >>7660451
    No, Phillipino Kroot. Not only do they eat you, they sell you some magazine subscriptions.
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)01:18 No.7660496
    >>7660481
    And they get all the Japanese series that never got here in the '80s.
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)01:41 No.7660739
    Bumpan to see if we can come up with anything else.
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)01:46 No.7660787
    This needs an image of Tzeentch flipping over a Go board next to a short, bearded man yelling "SUN TZUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!"
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)02:50 No.7661545
    >>7660366

    Unfortunately, you're right. It would end up shoehorned into the existing Roman-Catholic Latin-chantan Imperial culture, instead.
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)02:53 No.7661576
         File1263887617.png-(2.37 MB, 906x1375, 1249155785602.png)
    2.37 MB
    Diyu Wang, Lord of the Thousand Hells. Sounds like a good name for a general.
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)02:53 No.7661584
    >>7657873How come the emperor has a Chinese-sounding name and then everything else sounds Japanese?

    most people don't know the Chinese names of things, and we are weeaboo enough to know the Japanese stuff like youkai
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)02:54 No.7661596
    >>7660411And the Kroot are Thai, Vietnamese and Malayan.

    the kroot are already vietnamese though

    Angkor Prat!
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)02:57 No.7661621
    >>7660739Bumpan to see if we can come up with anything else.

    LU BU
    PRIMARCH
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)02:59 No.7661649
    >>7660366
    Brutally? That's kind of simple and small minded. But then, it is the Imperium of mandkind, and no one is perfect.
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)03:01 No.7661677
    >>7661649
    >Imperium of Mankind
    >Imperfect

    Understatement Achievement Unlocked.
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)03:40 No.7662084
    >>7661677
    Gee, thanks for being a smartass. That was sure useful.
    I was just hinting that I thought his Confucian character being less than a paragon of Confucian benevolence and virtue is understandable what with the Imperium angle and all. One would expect modifications in the Grim Darkness of the Future. Maybe only counting towards humans
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)03:54 No.7662253
    >>7662084
    >Gee, thanks for being a smartass. That was sure useful.

    Not a problem.

    I tend to think, though, that messing with the culture you're supposed to be adding for flavor would gradually slip back into the regular old KILL HERETICS FOR EMPRA NOMINE DICTUM SACRUM BONUM FLATULUM just like before, which defeats the purpose of spicing up WH40K with Chinese culture.

    Maybe I'm wrong; if so, show me some Space Future Confucianism that isn't plain ol' 40K.
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)04:20 No.7662524
    bump
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)04:22 No.7662543
    Lulz, this would be amusing.
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)04:28 No.7662598
    So what is chaos?

    Is the warp the ocean or the sky?

    The Tau don't use the warp so they have to be India, they just fight the Imperium by land.
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)04:36 No.7662676
    He was an old man, tall, with a thin grey queue, and bright large eyes under which were heavy bags. His teeth were broken and discoloured. He was exceedingly thin, and his hands, fine and small, were withered and claw-like. I had been told that he was an opium-smoker. He was very shabbily dressed in a black gown, a little black cap, both much for the worse for wear, and dark grey trousers gartered at the ankle. He was watching. He did not know what attitude to take up, and he had the manner of a man who was on his guard. Of course the philospher occupies a royal place among those who concern themselves with the things of the spirit and we have the authority of Benjamin Disraeli that royalty must be treated with abundant flattery. I seized my trowel. Presently I was conscious of a certain relaxation in his demeanour. He was like a man who was all set and rigid to have his photograph taken, but hearing the shutter click lets himself go and eases into his natural self. He showed me his books.

    "I took the Ph. D in Berlin, you know," he said. "And afterwards I studied for some time in Oxford. But the English, if you will allow me to say so, have no great aptitude for philosophy."

    Though he put the remark apologetically it was evident that he was not displeased to say a slightly disagreeable thing.
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)04:37 No.7662688
    "We have had philosophers who have not been without influence in the world of thought," I suggested.

    "Hume and Berkeley? The philosophers who taught at Oxford when I was there were anxious not to offend their theological colleagues. They would not follow their thought to its logical consequences in case they should jeopardise their position in university society.

    "Have you studied the modern developments of philosophy in America?" I asked.

    "Are you speaking of Pragmatism? It is the last refuge of those who want to believe the incredible. I have more use for American petroleum than for American philosophy."

    His judgments were tart. We sat down once more and drank another cup of tea. He began to
    talk with fluency. He spoke a somewhat formal but an idiomatic English. Now and then he helped himself out with a German phrase. So far as it was possible for a man of that stubborn character to be influenced he had been influenced by Germany. The method and the industry of the Germans had deeply impressed him and their philosophical acumen was patent to him when a laborious professor published in a learned magazine an essay on one of his own writings.
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)04:38 No.7662696
    "I have written twenty books," he said. "And that is the only notice that has ever been taken of me in a European publication."

    But his study of Western philosophy had only served in the end to satisfy him that wisdom after all was to be found within the limits of the Confucian canon. He accepted its philosophy with conviction. It answered the needs of his spirit with a completeness which made all foreign learnings seem vain. I was interested in this because it bore out an opinion of mine that philosophy is an affair of character rather than of logic: the philosopher believes not according to evidence, but according to his own temperament; and his thinking merely serves to make reasonable what his instinct regards as true. If Confucianism gained so firm a hold on the Chinese it is because it explained and expressed them as no other system of thought could do.

    My host lit a cigarette. His voice at first had been thin and tired, but as he grew interested in what he said it gained volume. He talked vehemently. There was in him none of the repose of the sage. He was a polemist and a fighter. He loathed the modern cry for individualism. For him society was the unit, and the family the foundation of society. He upheld the old China and the old school, monarchy, and the rigid canon of Confucius. He grew violent and bitter as he spoke of the students, fresh from foreign universities, who with sacrilegious hands tore down the oldest civilisation in the world.
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)04:39 No.7662703
    "But you, do you know what you are doing?" he exclaimed. "What is the reason for which you deem yourselves our betters? Have you excelled us in arts or letters? Have our thinkers been less profound than yours? Has our civilisation been less elaborate, less complicated, less refined than yours? Why, when you lived in caves and clothed yourselves with skins we were cultured people. Do you know that we tried an experiment which is unique in the history of the world? We sought to rule this great country not by force, but by wisdom. And for centuries we succeeded. Then why does the white man despise the yellow? Shall I tell you? Because he has invented the machine gun. That is your superiority. We are a defenceless horde and you can blow us into eternity. You have shattered the dream of our philosophers that the world could be governed by the power of law and order. And now you are teaching our young men your secret. You have thrust your hideous invention upon us. Do you not know that there are in this country four hundred millions of the most practical and industrious people in the world? Do you think it will take us long to learn? And what will become of your superiority when the yellow man can make as good guns as the white and fire them as straight? You have appealed to the machine gun and by the machine gun shall you be judged."

    But at that moment we were interrupted. A little girl came softly in and nestled close up to the old gentleman. She stared at me with curious eyes. He told me that she was his youngest child. He put his arms round her and with a murmur of caressing words kissed her fondly. She wore a black coat and trousers that barely reached her ankles, and she had a long pig-tail hanging down her back. She was born on the day the revolution was brought to a successful issue by the abdication of the emperor.

    "I thought she heralded the Spring of a new era," he said. "She was but the last flower of this great nation's Fall."
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)04:44 No.7662766
    >>7662703

    MANLY TEARS

    Reminds me of the Once Upon A Time In China movies.
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)04:47 No.7662789
    >>7662766
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)04:47 No.7662796
    >>7662766

    From a drawer in his roll-top desk he took a few cash, and handing them to her, sent her away.

    "You see that I wear a queue," he said, taking it in his hands. "It is a symbol. I am the last representative of the old China."

    He talked to me, more gently now, of how philosophers in long past days wandered from state to state with their disciples, teaching all who were worthy to learn. Kings called them to their councils and made them rulers of cities. His erudition was great and his eloquent phrases gave a multi-coloured vitality to the incidents he related to me of the history of his country. I could not help thinking him a somewhat pathetic figure. He felt in himself the great capacity to administer the state, but there was no king to entrust him with office; he had vast stores of learning which he was eager to impart to the great band of students that his soul hankered after, and there came to listen but a few, wretched, half-starved, and obstuse provincials.

    Once or twice discretion had made me suggest that I should take my leave, but he had been unwilling to let me go. Now at last I was obliged to. I rose. He held my hand.

    "I should like to give you something as a recollection of your visit to the last philosopher in China, but I am a poor man and I do not know what I can give you that would be worthy of your acceptance."

    I protested that the recollection of my visit was in itself a priceless gift. He smiled.

    "Men have short memories in these degenerate days, and I should like to give you something more substantial. I would give you one of my books, but you cannot read Chinese."

    He looked at me with amicable perplexity. I had an inspiration.

    "Give me a sample of your calligraphy." I said.
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)04:48 No.7662806
    "Would you like that?" He smiled. "In my youth I was considered to wield the brush in a manner that is not entirely despicable."

    He sat down at his desk, took a fair sheet of paper, and placed it before him. He poured a few drops of water on a stone, rubbed the ink stick in it, and took his brush. With a few movement of the arm he began to write. And as I watched him I remembered with not a little amusement something else which had been told me of him. It appeared that the old gentleman whenever he could scrape a little money together, spent it wantonly in the streets inhabited by ladies to whom a euphemism is generally used. His eldest son, a person of standing in the city. was vexed and humiliated by the scandal of this behaviour; and only his strong sense of filial piety prevented him from reproaching the libertine with severity. I daresay that to a son such looseness would be disconcerting, but the student of human nature could look upon it with equanimity. Philosophers are apt to elaborate their theories in the study, forming conclusions upon life which they know only at second hand, and it has seemed to me often that their works would have a more definite significance if they had exposed themselves to the vicissitudes which befall the common run of men. I was prepared to regard the old gentleman's dalliance in hidden places with leniency. Perhaps he sought but to elucidate the most inscrutible of human illusions.

    He finished. To dry the ink, he scattered a little ash on the paper and rising handed it to me.

    "What have you written?" I asked.

    I thought there was a slightly malicious gleam in his eyes.

    "I have ventured to offer you two little poems of my own."

    "I did not know you were a poet."

    "When China was still an uncivilised country," he retorted with sarcasm, "all educated men could write verse at least with elegance."

    I took the paper and looked at the Chinese characters. They made an agreeable pattern upon it.
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)04:48 No.7662811
    "Won't you also give me a translation?"

    "Tradutore—tradittore," he answered. "You cannot expect me to betray myself. Ask one of your English friends. Those who know most about China know nothing, but you will at least find one who is competent to give you a rendering of a few rough and simple lines."

    I bade him farewell, and with great politeness he showed me to my chair. When I had the opportunity I gave the poems to a sinologue of my acquaintance, and here is the version he made [1]. I confess that, doubtless unreasonably, I was somewhat taken aback when I read it.

    You loved me not: your voice was sweet;
    Your eyes were full of laughter; your hands were tender.
    And then you loved me: your voice was bitter;
    Your eyes were full of tears; your hands were cruel.
    Sad, sad that love should make you
    Unlovable.

    ***

    I craved the years would quickly pass
    That you might lose
    The brightness of your eyes, the peach-bloom of your skin,
    And all the cruel splendour of your youth.
    The I alone would love you
    And you at last would care.

    The envious years have passed full soon
    And you have lost
    The brightness of your eyes, the peach-bloom of your skin,
    And all the charming splendour of your youth.
    Alas, I do not love you
    And I care not if you care.

    [1] I owe it to the kindness of my friend Mr. P. W. Davidson
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)04:51 No.7662832
    >>7662703
    >And what will become of your superiority when the yellow man can make as good guns as the white and fire them as straight?

    That's just given me an idea for a BBEG: give weapons and the knowledge of war to the "good" kingdom, then watch as they conquer their neighbours and laugh as your country's martyrdom brings their inevitable moral fall.
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)04:54 No.7662871
    this is the first thread I have ever seen that I really wanted to archive
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)04:56 No.7662901
    >>7662832

    There's another paradox in Western culture few people think about.

    Science challenges the notions of religion, and is full of alchemists and other heretics. And the religious leaders hold sway over the nation. Yet, science provides the power to conquer other nations.

    How does the nation rationalize away their reliance on cannon and musket ... or, if said science includes arcane magic, spells and summoned creatures? And who is using who ... the priests and paladins of the Church, or the heretics, scientists and sorcerors all?

    How soon can they be made to turn on one another, before they conquer the world? Infiltration and espionage action in a fantasy setting, mang.
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)04:58 No.7662908
    >>7658014
    Fucking Ouiaboos.
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)04:58 No.7662918
    >>7662908
    Ouiabeaux
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)05:00 No.7662929
    >>7662918

    Ouiabous (if it's plural), dipshit. It's weeaboo, not weeabo.
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)05:03 No.7662959
    Further proof that, beyond philosophy, the east is good for very little.
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)05:16 No.7663054
    Was going to recommend Sima Yi as Horus, but Lu Bu works.
    Cao Cao as Calgar?
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)05:18 No.7663080
    >>7662959
    They're a right bunch of champs at multiplying beyond numbers their lands can support. That could be considered being very, very bad at multiplying in a way, now that I think of it.
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)05:21 No.7663112
    >>7663054

    Lu Bu strikes me as more of a Kharn the Betrayer.
    >> Iron Lung 01/19/10(Tue)05:35 No.7663242
    >>7663112
    It works that Horus dies as well.
    Lu Bu, for all his legendary awesome, dies on his knees, executed like a common criminal.
    And it makes a good contrast that he dies in anger and helpless fury instead of in sudden contrite awareness like Horus. Lu Bu is a Legendary Bastard in a setting rich with erudite, cultured badasses. Part of his legend is how much he was about himself, even above and beyond the other warlords.
    >> Anonymous 01/19/10(Tue)08:28 No.7664766
    Fist of the East Star



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