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  • File : 1288472896.jpg-(128 KB, 1680x1134, PZO1107-GoblinFireBrigade.jpg)
    128 KB Malvare 10/30/10(Sat)17:08 No.12624754  
    Well yesterday I posted a silly goblin story (which can be seen here: http://malvare.deviantart.com/gallery/#/d31s0gq)

    I'm posting a longer one now. If people want it to continue beyond what gets posted today, let me know. There's no shortage of ideas. I just want to know if people want it to continue or not.

    Story starts next post:
    >> Malvare 10/30/10(Sat)17:09 No.12624760
    Learnwise knew the proper way to collect honey. As the youngest son of chief Groundrock of the Honeyrumble Clan, he had been trained since birth in the ancient methods for gathering the golden liquid. He knew all the ins and outs, where to find a proper hive, how to approach… it was all second nature to him. Now he was out again, having found he perfect hive, with a team of carefully selected goblins.
    There was Stillbush, a strong goblin who wore two human boots and a gray loincloth; Turtlecrack, a thin, agile goblin with a torn up shirt but undamaged pants; and Learnwise himself, slightly taller than the both of them, between Stillbush and Turtlecrack in strength and speed, commanding instant respect with his iron shoulder armor atop his leather vest, pants, and moccasins. At his side was the goblin sword (or human dagger) of inheritance, with a bronze hilt and slightly rusted iron blade.
    Learnwise, Stillbrush Turtlecrack made their way to the nice large hive that had been discovered earlier that morning. A large, human-made sack was hung over Turtlecrack’s shoulder. They wound their way through bushes, carefully making sure that they weren’t being followed and that nobody was watching them. At last the reached the place. They hid behind a bush of redberries as they analyzed the situation.
    The hive was situated on a large branch hanging out about ten feet in the air. Below the tree was plenty of open space, but getting to the hive itself would be difficult because the branches were unusually close together. Still, this was not the hardest job the three of them had attempted. There was plenty of easy kindling for a fire to smoke out the bees, and all three were well versed in how to make flame. With proper smoking, the bees would be of no threat at all.
    >> Malvare 10/30/10(Sat)17:10 No.12624770
    Expertly they put the plan in motion. Learnwise climbed up the tree, making his way to the branch. Stillbush took the sticks below the tree and threw them up at the hive, eventually rattling it. A swarm of angered bees spewed forth from the hive and descended upon the goblin, who started running. Learnwise sprang into action, taking out his blade and slicing into the hive’s connection to the branch. The motion, however, disturbed the hive further, and even more bees than before poured out and attacked him. Learnwise had just barely severed the connection when the bees reached him. He fought back but lost his balance, falling from the branch to another, which bent down with his weight. The hive, no longer attached to the tree, fell straight down into Turtlecrack’s sack. The goblin quickly heaved the sack up and smacked it on the ground, destroying the hive within. Learnwise slid down the branch, which bent closer and closer to the ground, until having reached the end of it he let go and fell with a thump. He and Turtlecrack quickly began running away, back to the village, their plan accomplished.
    The three made their way back to the clearing that was the Honeyrumble village. The goblins of Honeyrumble were about a hundred strong, including females and goblings. They lived in stick structures lashed together that could hardly pass as shelter. The more industrious goblins and the leadership of the clan built wigwams for themselves, sturdy structures that most of the village hid in during particularly harsh weather. Despite having these places to sleep, most of the goblins simply lay down wherever they felt like.
    >> Malvare 10/30/10(Sat)17:11 No.12624775
    Learnwise, Stillbush, and Turtlecrack were the heroes of the day. Stillbush had been stung a mere fifteen times, and Learnwise even fewer than that. They told everyone the story, making sure that the bees were the size of dragons, and all the other goblins gasped in horror and were amazed at just how brave these three goblins were. Learnwise made sure one goblin in particular was very impressed with him. Applethrow was a beautiful young female, with the sharpest fangs Learnwise had ever seen. Clad in freshly skinned squirrel fur, she was every young goblin male’s dream, and Learnwise often imagined raising goblings together with her. He steeled himself when he saw her approach.
    “It’s so amazing how you can take on such nasty monsters!” She said. “It’s so dangerous!”
    “That’s what makes it taste so good.” Learnwise replied, reaching into Turtlecrack’s sack and pulling out a wad of honeycomb dripping with honey. “Here, eat this, there’s plenty.”
    Applethrow took the honeycomb and licked it. “It’s good!”
    “See? That’s the taste of danger!”
    Applethrow giggled. “You shouldn’t risk your life just for this though!”
    Learnwise smirked. “It’s not risky at all when you’re as good at is as I am. Of course I wasn’t always this good. The first time I went hive hunting I nearly died!”
    Applethrow gasped and clenched the honeycomb. “Really? How did you make it?”
    Learnwise grinned at her and motioned for her to follow him. “It wasn’t easy, that’s for sure. Chief Groundrock had never taken me out hive hunting before; I was hardly older than a gobling…”
    >> Malvare 10/30/10(Sat)17:12 No.12624785
    The two goblins meandered around the village as Learnwise told Applethrow the very exaggerated tale of how he was gored by the monstrous venomous spear of a giant bee. Applethrow gasped in all the right places, and Learnwise felt that he was about to win her over completely when a goblin holding a wooden spear approached them.
    “Learnwise, Chief Groundrock has returned. He wants to talk to you in his wigwam.”
    Learnwise sighed. “It’s probably really important. I have to go.”
    Applethrow was clearly disappointed, but she understood. “Well, let me just say that this was the best honey I’ve ever had.”
    “Thanks, but now I need to find an even more dangerous hive to get you even better honey!”
    Laughing, Applethrow shooed him away. “Go on! Get to Chief Groundrock, Learnwise! Let me enjoy my honey without worrying you’ll be devoured by those beasts!”
    Le arnwise walked over to Groundrock’s wigwam, the largest structure in the village. Two guardgoblins stood next to the open entrance, where a fire burning low. He walked past the two and shut the door.
    Groundrock was getting old for a goblin. He was bent forward, his skin wrinkled, and he supported himself on a club. He wore a leather kilt and a colorful headband, and on his back was a yellow cloak with a honeycomb expertly stitched intoit, but was otherwise unclothed.
    “Ah, Learnwise, you’re here. Good, good.” Groundrock leaned back against his bed of sacks. “There is much to discuss.”
    “How did the meeting with the other chieftains go?” Learnwise asked. “Is everything all right with the other clans? Are the hobbs still attacking?”
    “Always the one to ask questions, Learnwise.” Groundrock smiled wearily. “If only your brothers and sisters had been like you, maybe they wouldn’t have died so foolishly…”
    “Don’t speak badly about them, father. How could they have known those bears were dangerous?” He said wryly.
    >> Malvare 10/30/10(Sat)17:13 No.12624797
    “The meeting did not go well.” Groundrock explained. “The hobbs have now destroyed the Carpcatch Clan and the Gustlimb Clan.”
    “That means there are only ten goblin clans left!”
    Groundrock nodded gravely. “Indeed, and the Carpcatch and Gustlimb were our two closest allies.”
    Learnwise poked the fire with his blade. “So what can we do to stop the hobbs?”
    “Nothing.” Groundsrock replied, shaking his head. “We goblins are helpless before the hobbs. We could never stand up to them.”
    “So we’re just going to die then?” Learnwise asked angrily. “We’ll just let the hobbs come here and slaughter all of us down to the last gobling, because we can’t stop them?”
    “No, Learnwise, that will not happen.” Groundrock smiled knowingly. “It is like I said, you ask questions more than most goblins. That is how we will stop them.”
    “So we’re going to ask the hobbs to stop and that will do it?” Learnwise asked incredulously.
    “No, no, that’s not it at all.” Groundrock said, watching his son squirm anxiously. “You are going to go to the Steeldoom and we shall ask them to defeat the hobbs for us.”
    Learnwise’s jaw dropped. “You can’t… you don’t really mean that, right? Going to the Steeldoom is a terrible idea. What’s the real plan?”
    “You are to request aid from the Steeldoom using whatever means possible.” Groundrock said sternly. “They are our only hope, Learnwise. The goblin clans have not united to stop the hobbs, the chieftains refused to listen to me!”
    >> Malvare 10/30/10(Sat)17:15 No.12624808
    “Because this is insane.” Learnwise said. “Why would any goblin ever go near the Steeldoom? They come in, just two of them, covered in metal, slaughter many goblins, they just leave as mysteriously as they came! They’re worse than the hobbs!”
    “No, they are not.” Groundrock shook his head. He stared his son dead in the eyes. “You must listen to me, Learnwise. What I am about to tell you I have told to nobody else. This is my last and greatest secret, and it is the key to our success.”
    Learnwise tried to protest but Groundrock silenced him.
    “When I was but a gobling, I left Honeyrumble. I wandered away on my own and nobody even knew I was missing. It’s a wonder that some animal didn’t kill me. I quickly grew lost in the woods. Just before nightfall they found me. Three Steeldoom discovered me next to a tree, and I was very frightened of them. They were the most menacing, terrifying things I had ever seen! But they didn’t harm me. No, they brought me back to their own village, Cridon.”
    “You’ve been to Cridon? The legendary village of the Steeldoom?” Learnwise gasped in amazement.
    “I just said they took me there, of course I’ve been! And you’re supposed to be the smart one…” Groundrock cleared his throat and continued. “They took me to Cridon, and it truly is a place like no other. They don’t live in sticks and huts at Cridon. No, they live in giant wood homes so large that to make one takes a forest. There were more of these giant wooden homes than I could count, than I can count even now, and a wall of cut and sharpened trees surrounded all of Cridon. But even this was nothing compared to what was at the very center.”
    “What was there? What could possibly be more amazing than those homes?”
    >> Malvare 10/30/10(Sat)17:17 No.12624824
    Groundrock’s eyes widened at the memory. “They had created a mountain! They had placed the stone into a mountain, going straight up high into the sky! I have seen only one thing as amazing as this, just once. This mountain, called Tower, is where the Steeldoom themselves live.”
    Learnwise wanted to know what Groundrock had seen that was so amazing, something as great as Tower, but he said nothing.
    “The Steeldoom we know, covered in metal, are just the warriors, and they call themselves knights. Most of the Steeldoom are tall, all wearing brown cloth and leather and fur, with the skin of peaches. The knights took me to Tower, and I saw all this, and in my fear I remember each and every detail, the strange animals they had tied together, the great wooden homes, the powerful weapons… In Tower I was given to a female, who soaked me in a basin full of water. They put me in cloth and sat me down and started poking me and asking me questions. They called me Lostin. I lived in Cridon for seasons. I learned their language and learned why the knights attack us.”
    “Why?”
    “Because we attack the Steeldoom and steal their things. They only attack the villages that have already attacked them.” Groundrock smiled. “With all my newfound knowledge, when I finally returned here I quickly became chief. The Steeldoom have never attacked Honeyrumble because I have never provoked them.”
    >> Malvare 10/30/10(Sat)17:17 No.12624828
    “So that’s why we’re the ‘safest village in the forest.’” Learnwise said.
    “That is why.” Groundrock nodded. “I was told that, if Honeyrumble was peaceful, that if it ever found itself in trouble that I should send a goblin, carrying a banner, and say that Lostin needs aid. The Steeldoom and the knights would come and save us.”
    “So the Steeldoom can save us from the hobbs?” Learnwise asked.
    “I just said that, yes.”
    “Where is this banner then?”
    Groundrock took off his old yellow cloak with the etched honeycomb and spread it before Learnwise. “There is no way a goblin could have made something like this.”
    Learnwise gaped at the cloak. “All these seasons you’ve had this and I’ve never…” He sat back, holding his head. “So why am I the one going to the Steeldoom?”
    “Because you are my son. You will be the next chief of the Honeyrumble Clan, and you need to protect it from the Steeldoom and pass down this protection to your own children. You must make our village, and all other villages, safe. It is your duty. I am old, Learnwise. My final task is to teach you the Steeldoom tongue so that you may speak with then. After that, the fate of goblins is up to you.”
    The enormity of this responsibility was overwhelming. Learnwise suddenly felt smaller than he had ever before, insignificant in the face of a world too large to comprehend. “How long do you have to teach me? Will we make it in time?”
    “The hobbs are preparing for winter now, as are the rest of the villages. We have the whole season to us before you must go to Cirdon. Teach whomever you take with you the language of the Steeldoom. Spring is when your work will begin.”
    Learnwise hesitated, and then bowed his head. “I am ready to learn.”
    He would have such a story to charm Applethrow with once all was said and done!
    >> Malvare 10/30/10(Sat)18:07 No.12625244
    “This is your last chance to join Honeyrumble in its alliance with the Steeldoom, my friends.” Groundrock said to the chieftains gathered around the fire. “Winter is gone, spring is upon us. The hobbs are going to move again, and in two seasons we’ll all be wiped out unless we ask the Steeldoom for aid.”
    “You’re mad!” Chief Emberneed of the Undercandle called out. “The Steeldoom are even worse than the hobbs! You’re inviting death upon us all from all sides!”
    “The Steeldoom cannot be trusted!” Nutgore of the Troutfllicker concurred. “They slaughter good goblins indiscriminately! Not even goblings are safe!”
    “I must assure you that the Steeldoom will save us.” Groundrock said. “They are not what you think! They don’t kill indiscriminately, they—“
    “So it’s our fault, then?” Emberneed snarled. “Why hasn’t Honeyrumble been attacked by the Steeldoom? Perhaps a certain chief is working with them to destroy the other villages!”
    The chieftains nodded in agreement.
    >> Malvare 10/30/10(Sat)18:09 No.12625264
    “If there is anyone to unite against, it’s the Honeyrumble.” Chief Fieldflow of the Cobbleslash proposed. “If they are working with the Steeldoom, then maybe they are working with the hobbs as well.”
    “My friends…” Groundrock began, but Emberneed cut him off.
    “Silence. We are no friends of Honeyrumble. Kill this traitor, and all his goblins, down to the smallest gobling!”
    Groundrock gawked in horror at Emberneed, but chief Oakspine of the Raftready stood up and stared Emberneed down. “While I do not agree with Groundrock, I see no reason to destroy him and his goblins. Why do we not unite against the hobbs? We can all agree they are the true threat.”
    “Yes!” Fieldflow stood triumphantly. “Let the Cobbleslash lead the goblins against the hobbs! We shall push them back, destroy them all!”
    “And why should the Cobbleslash lead?” Nutgore growled. “The Troutflicker succeeds where the Cobbleslash falls!”
    “No.” Emberneed shoved Nutgore back. “The Undercandle is the greatest of all goblins! I shall lead the goblins against the hobbs, for Undercandle!”
    The meeting ended with the usual fight, which Groundrock just barely managed to escape from.
    >> Malvare 10/30/10(Sat)18:10 No.12625276
    Learnwise stood leaning against his wigwam, talking to Applethrow that cold and windy night.
    “So you’re really going to the Steeldoom tomorrow?” Applethrow asked. Learnwise nodded.
    “First thing in the morning. Stillbush and Turtlecrack are coming with me.”
    “But this is way more dangerous than getting honey!” Applethrow protested. “You shouldn’t have to go! Stay here where it’s safe!”
    “But it’s not safe.” Learnwise sighed. “The hobbs are coming, we won’t last more than two seasons. I have to go.”
    “But why you? Why not any other goblin?”
    “I’m Learnwise, son of Groundrock, Chief of the Honeyrumble Clan. It’s my responsibility to protect Honeyrumble until the day I die. I’m the only one who can make the journey.”
    Tears began forming in Applethrow’s eyes.
    “Applethrow… I’m going to make it. The Steeldoom aren’t all that far, I just need to follow the afternoon sun on the Flatline. It’s not even three moons away. It won’t be long.” He put a hand on her shoulder. “Besides, maybe the Steeldoom will have honey. I’ll bet it tastes better than any other honey ever.”
    “Just say you won’t die.”
    There was silence except for the wind, which chilled to the bone even through fur and leather. Learnwise held Applethrow by the shoulder. “Come on, it’s getting cold, let’s get inside. You can sleep in here where it’s warm, I’ll make a fire.”
    Applethrow nodded and the two goblins entered the wigwam, sealing the threshold behind them.
    >> Malvare 10/30/10(Sat)18:11 No.12625282
    The three goblins set out at dawn after a quick breakfast. They went north where Groundrock had directed Learnwise. Stillbush held a spear, Learnwise his blade, and Turtlecrack the honeycomb banner on a stick.
    “I’m glad winter is finally over, it feels like I can finally talk.” Turtlecrack said.
    “What does winter have to do with that?” Stillbush asked.
    “I’m just talking because I can now.”
    “Quiet you two.” Learnwise whispered curtly. “We don’t want anyone to hear us, especially on the Flatline.”
    They walked on, silent save for crashing through bushes because straight lines are faster than other paths. The only creatures that crossed their path were several rabbits. After a delicious bunny lunch they reached the Flatline. It was a simple dirt road passing through the forest from east to west. They turned west to Cridon.
    On the first day they encountered nothing interesting, and camped in high spirits on the road. But the next day, in the afternoon, they heard a powerful clopping sound and felt the ground shake.
    “What is it? What’s going on?” Stillbush asked.
    “The Steeldoom must be coming!” Turtlecrack despaired.
    “Both of you calm down! Give me the banner!” Learnwise grabbed the stick and waved the banner around.
    >> Malvare 10/30/10(Sat)18:12 No.12625293
    From the bend came three men in full plate armor, riding horses, with deep blue surcoats displaying white eagles. Their armor gleamed brightly in the afternoon sun, and they terrified the goblins.
    “Lostin needs aid! Lostin needs aid!” Learnwise shouted in terror, backing away from the knights. Stillbush and Turtlecrush fell over each other trying to escape.
    The knights halted. One pointed at Learnwise and said something the goblins couldn’t hear, which made the knights laugh. The leading knight stepped off his horse and onto the road. As he approached Learnwise he drew his sword.
    The feeble blade at the goblin’s side was useless. In desperation Learnwise waved the banner even more frantically than before. “Lostin needs aid! Lostin needs aid!”
    “Don’t talk human unless you’re a human.” The knight said, raising his sword.
    “Wait!”
    The knight turned. “What is it?”
    The second knight got off his horse and walked to the goblins. “Lostin. I’ve heard that name before. Didn’t my father say something about a goblin named Lostin?”
    “Yes!” Learnwise said quickly, gasping for breath. “Lostin is my father, chief of the Honeyrumble Clan! He was rescued by you Steeldoom and taken to Tower in Cridon, and you promised to help him if he sent a goblin with this banner! So I have this banner! We need your help!”
    >> Malvare 10/30/10(Sat)18:12 No.12625302
    “Steeldoom?” The knights all looked at each other and burst into uproarious laughter. The first knight took off his helmet, revealing a short brown beard but long hair. “Forgive us, goblins, we didn’t remember what we were told years ago about that rescued goblin child. I am Sir Vay. You’ll be wanting to go to Cridon, right?”
    The three goblins nodded in unison.
    “Well it’s not far from here, not on horseback. We’re just scouting around, looking for things of interest, and we reckon that you’re things of interest.” Sir Vay explained. “We’ll take you three to Cridon. You, big one, get with Sir Eptishus, small one, get with Sir Mize, banner goblin, get on with me.”
    Sir Vay lifted Learnwise up onto the saddle and them pulled himself up and over. “What’s your name, goblin?”
    “Learnwise.”
    “Funny name for a goblin.” Sir Vay mused. “Well, hold on to the saddle tight, we’re off!”
    Learnwise nearly fell from the horse as it broke out in a gallop back west to Cridon.
    >> Anonymous 10/30/10(Sat)18:19 No.12625373
    I liked your one last night, and look forward to reading this one. You have nice pacing and really got into the sort of poor egalitarian lifestyle of the goblin-- Like how "a cow, a real cow!" is a big deal to them. I'm having a busy day but will read this when I get a chance.
    >> Malvare 10/30/10(Sat)18:21 No.12625388
    Is anyone reading this? I'm feeling self-conscious.
    >> Anonymous 10/30/10(Sat)18:26 No.12625439
         File1288477617.gif-(13 KB, 100x100, F5.gif)
    13 KB
    >>12625388
    I am. this is a great story. don't let us stop you, please continue.
    >> Anonymous 10/30/10(Sat)18:27 No.12625448
    >>12625388
    I'm reading it.
    >> Anonymous 10/30/10(Sat)18:35 No.12625516
    >>12625388
    MOAR!
    >> Anonymous 10/30/10(Sat)18:35 No.12625519
    >>12625388
    i'm reading but have to go.
    Is this being posted on your DA page?
    >> Malvare 10/30/10(Sat)18:37 No.12625537
    >>12625439
    >>12625448
    >>12625516
    Well since I know people are waiting, full speed ahead!
    I'm trying to post these at about eight pages at a time, which is why it takes a bit between postings.
    >> Malvare 10/30/10(Sat)18:38 No.12625553
    >>12625519
    Maybe. This will probably be a while though, I have more trouble writing something short than something long.
    >> Malvare 10/30/10(Sat)18:50 No.12625670
    Riding a horse was terrifying. Learnwise had never imagined a goblin could ever move that quickly and yet he had, thanks to the Steeldoom knight. What were these creatures, that mastered beasts of such power? Surely the hobbs could not stand against them.
    After only an hour and a half they reached Cridon and Learnwise’s jaw dropped. Groundrock’s story was true, every word of it! The line of trees, branches cut off, tops sharpened, all lined in a massive, impenetrable wall, the buildings that put the wigwams to shame, crafted from more trees than a goblin could imagine…. These Steeldoom were absolute monsters, capable of such feats of strength! He gazed out and around at the Steeldoom not in any armor. Each and everyone seemed to be staring at him or one of the knights.
    And then he saw it.
    Tower was the most amazing sight of the young goblin’s life. Stone was so heavy, so strong, and the Steeldoom had mastered it, made a mountain from it! It was shaped so deliberately, so impossibly, that he felt like he was dreaming. But he had spent too much time preparing for this to be dreaming. He knew that inside Tower was the chief of the Steeldoom, the one who could save Honeyrumble from the hobbs. And yet, how terrifying that chief must be!
    >> Malvare 10/30/10(Sat)18:51 No.12625683
    The three knights guided their horses up the hill to Tower, where smaller, unarmored Steeldooms helped the knights and goblins off before taking the horses away. “Come on, goblins, I guess you’re expected.”
    Sir Vay lead the way into Tower, where a number of Steeldooms were busy doing things Learnwise didn’t know about. For the first time in his life the goblin ascended a stairway. Sir Vay rapped his knuckles on a door and Learnwise heard an old voice say “Come in.”
    Inside the room was an old Steeldoom, skin pale and stretched across his once muscular frame. His eyes seemed faded slightly, and his hair and beard were quite white, contrasting with the deep, blood red robe he wore. He sat at a desk, quill in hand, writing on a piece of parchment.
    “Lord Denaln, these goblins would like to speak with you.” Said Sir Vay.
    At the mention of goblins Lord Denaln immediately replace the quill in its holder, closed the ink bottle and looked down at the three goblins before him. His voice, though old, now seemed more authoritative. “So Lostin calls for help after all of these years.” He said, sounding almost hurt. “He never once let us know how he was doing, how the village was progressing. We wondered if he had died. A fine way to repay the friend who rescued him so long ago!”
    Learnwise had to find some excuse for his father. “I am very sorry, but my chief has not been able to send anyone up because the other tribes haven’t allowed it. They… they kill all the messengers. He tried sending some, but they were murdered.”
    “Did he now.” Denaln did not seem impressed.
    >> Malvare 10/30/10(Sat)18:52 No.12625690
    “He wishes me to give his thanks and apologies for all the troubles he has caused you, and would like to remind you that Honeyrumble has never attacked Cridon—“
    “I know this.” Denaln sighed wistfully and looked out a window. “That little scamp. Thought he was the toughest thing in the world. But he’s smart, he knows not to do anything stupid.” The lord turned back to look at the three goblins. “Very well. Tell me your troubles, and I will see what I can do.”
    The three goblins looked at each other with faces of mixed relief and anxiety. “Honeyrumble and all the other goblin villages are in danger of being destroyed by the invading hobbs, and we cannot stand against them because the other tribes refuse to unite and defend against them. We need the help of your knights to defeat the hobbs! Two knights can destroy half a village, surely you can spare just a few to help us!”
    Lord Denaln stroked his beard. “Hobgoblins, you say?”
    “Not goblins, just hobbs.” Stillbush corrected. Turtlecrack jabbed him in the side.
    “I see. Hm…” Lord Denaln leaned back in his chair. “Sir Vay, how many knights do we have stationed here in Cridon, and how many fighting men do we have?”
    “About ten knights total, my lord, and anywhere from two to five score peasants we can draft.”
    “Hm…” Lord Denaln stood up, seeming to take a great effort to do so. “Please find me a more exact figure, Sir Vay Sir Mize, scout out as far east as you can. See just how many hobgoblins we are dealing with here. I hope no too many, but we must be sure.”
    He walked around the desk. “Sir Eptishus, please have your squires deal with the goblins and their—erm—atmosphere.”
    The knights saluted.
    “I will do what I can for you, but if there are too many hobgoblins then my hands are tied as well.” Lord Denaln said. “Now, Sir Eptishus will attend to you.”
    >> Malvare 10/30/10(Sat)18:53 No.12625702
    “Well that was the most embarrassing moment in my entire life.” Turtlecrack complained, sitting, freshly washed, in an unused guestroom in Tower with the other two goblins, all dressed in comically oversized smocks. Stillbush and Learnwise agreed.
    “Thrown into water, then rubbed with all that weird bubbly stuff, and now put into these weird things while they destroy my poor clothes! This is outrageous!” Stillbush shouted.
    “The Steeldoom are strange, but don’t forget how strong they are.” Learnwise reminded them. “All this will be worth it in the end. Besides, we got to keep our weapons.”
    “You got to keep your weapons, you mean.” Turtlecrack grumbled. “I had to carry that stupid cloak.”
    The squires had simply managed to get the goblin clothes to smell wet and musty, though when they were returned to their owners they had been dried and heated. Even Turtlecrack had to admit that his clothes now felt wonderfully comfortable, if a little tighter. They made the wise decision not to try any of the food offered and instead fed on their rations. The entire time the squires and servants were giving them strange and dirty looks. Overall, they would not be sorry to leave this place.
    >> Malvare 10/30/10(Sat)18:53 No.12625710
    Sir Mize returned the next morning, rather breathless. “I rode as fast as I could all night, Lord Denaln. There’s hundreds, maybe a thousand, hobgoblins gathering near Lake Perry, more in the fortress they have on the other side. We can’t stop them. They’re going to smash all the way through here.”
    Hearing these words filled Learnwise with a terror he had never known. Even the Steeldoom couldn’t defeat the hobbs? Even with their wall of trees, Tower, and knights? It was then he realized that his entire village, everything he had ever known, was going to be destroyed in less than two seasons.
    Lord Denaln and the knights were unfazed by the news, however. In fact, they almost seemed jovial. “Well, it’s excellent timing then!” Denaln beamed at the goblins. “Truly you have saved the day!”
    “How?” Learnwise asked, furious at the Steeldoom’s disregard for reality. “He said that there were too many hobbs to stop, we’re all going to die!”
    “If you hadn’t come to us, we wouldn’t have known about the hobgoblin threat until it was far too late.” Denaln explained. “I am sending Sir Vay, Sir Eptishus, and Sir Mize to Soltador to alert the king. He’ll send down the army and the hobgoblins will be wiped out.”
    “King? What’s a king?”
    >> Malvare 10/30/10(Sat)18:54 No.12625717
    Denaln had a knowing grin on his face. “We live in Harmony Forest in the Eagle Kingdom. Cridon is just a town under the king’s command.” Seeing the looks of confusion on the goblin’s faces, he smirked. “Maybe this will help you understand: Think of me as the chief of Cridon. I have a chief above me, the king. Does that help?”
    Once again the goblins were left gaping. There was someone even greater than Lord Denaln? What kind of Steeldoom could he possibly be? If Cridon had all of this, then what would this king have?
    “If you would like to go with the knights to Soltador to meet the king, I am certain that would be acceptable, especially since you are the ones who warned us in the first place.” Denaln said with a wink.
    “Th—that’s too scary for me, I’m out.” Stillbush said. “This is too much. If you want to go, then go, but I don’t want to be a part of this anymore.”
    “Y-yeah, me too.” Turtlecrack said. “We’re in over our heads!”
    “And you?” Denaln asked Learnwise.
    Learnwise didn’t know. He was terrified at what this so-called king could be, how much bigger Soltador could be compared to Cridon. Would there be a wall of Towers? And yet… a part of him knew he could never live with himself if he didn’t go. The chance to see something this amazing was beyond anything he had dreamt about before.
    “You two can go back to Honeyrumble. I’m going to see this king.” He said rather smugly.
    Denaln grinned. “You remind me of Lostin. Very well, you can ride with Sir Vay again. It should take only a day’s ride. Now, you two, would you like a ride back to Honeyrumble or not?”
    “No, that’s all right, chief.” Turtlecrack assured him. “But we will tell them the good news.”
    “Very well then.” Denaln nodded. “Let’s get ourselves moving then. Squires, please escort these two goblins to the gates!”
    >> Malvare 10/30/10(Sat)18:55 No.12625725
    “You ready to see something so incredible your head will explode?” Sir Vay asked Learnwise, chuckling. “I saw the look on your face when we got here, don’t try and hide it, goblin.”
    “I’d like to see the king before I lose my head.” Learnwise countered.
    “Hah! You’re very human for a goblin. Your village must be quite interesting!” He lifted Learnwise onto the saddle.
    “If you tell me about Soltador I’ll tell you about Honeyrumble. That a deal, Steeldoom?”
    “I’m a noble, you know. Steeldoom is such an odd word.” The knight swung onto the horse. “But a deal is still a deal. What do you want to know?”

    >If anyone wants me to post faster (like every four pages instead of eight) let me know.
    >> Malvare 10/30/10(Sat)19:18 No.12625905
    >Just going to post segments as I finish them

    Learnwise was certainly learning many things these past few days. Soltador was the capital of the Eagle Kingdom, ruled by King Molossus, stretching from Soltador to a place called Dust Mountain to the west, the Bleak Marshes to the south, and Lake Perry to the east. Soltador was the northernmost city, a coastal metropolis on the Sea of Dreams. Of course, Learnwise had never heard of this Sea of Dreams, or even Dust Mountain, Bleak Marshes, or any sort of lake, so he simply assumed this was a large area.
    And the Eagle Kingdom was not alone. It had two allies, the elves of Koholon and the dwarves of Kar Unol, the Boat of Order, to the west. Both kingdoms were quite powerful, and stood the test of time. Most of the world was filled with kingdoms that started and fell within a few years, but Soltador was different. Soon it would celebrate its one-hundredth anniversary. Of course Learnwise had no conception of years or anniversaries, and was amazed to learn these “humans” measured time in units of four seasons.
    He was almost ashamed to speak of Honeyrumble, a small, insignificant goblin village of perhaps a hundred or hundred fifty goblins who lived in piles of sticks. He felt more insignificant than ever, lost in a giant world that moved on around him. Was Honeyrumble even worth saving in light of all this?
    Riding the horse for extended periods was very uncomfortable, and the goblin’s legs ached with pain. Unfortunately there was nothing Sir Vay could do about this.
    >> Malvare 10/30/10(Sat)19:19 No.12625916
    Inevitably, the awkward question came up.
    “How many goblins have you killed?”
    Sir Vant seemed to wince. “You won’t like the answer to that question. Fewer than a hundred, more than fifty.”
    “Why did you kill them?”
    “I was ordered to by Lord Denaln. The goblin villages attacked the poor peasants and farmers, sometimes killing them. We were supposed to intimidate you goblins into stopping, but that didn’t work out, so we ended up killing you en masse. None from Honeyrumble, as far as I am aware.” He added hastily.
    >> Malvare 10/30/10(Sat)19:25 No.12625969
    Towards the middle of the second day of riding Sir Vant tapped Learnwise on the shoulder. “When we pass over this hill you’ll see Soltador.”
    The goblin anxiously waited as the three knights rode agonizingly slowly up the grassy hill. Why did they go so slowly when Soltador was just around the corner! They were just reaching the top, almost there, Soltador was so close he could hardly wait! His heart was racing, what could it be like, what was Soltador—
    His heart skipped a beat. Soltador was far more than he had imagined it would be. There were hundred and hundreds of Towers, massive mountain walls, all deliberately placed by these humans! Every single home was built not of wood but stone, each structure its own mountain. He never realized just how much rock really existed, never thought nearly enough to build something like this, and there, in the center, was a building that put Tower to shame. So huge, so magnificent in its construction, dominating all the other mountains beneath it, all insignificant in comparison to this masterwork! He knew that this was where the king was. He knew that this was the power that would destroy the hobbs and save his home. But the terrible might of it frightened him. He was unleashing something he did not understand upon the goblin world, something he knew would get out of hand.
    >> Malvare 10/30/10(Sat)19:33 No.12626037
    They rode through a wall of stone, perfectly carved, under an archway flanked by two towers, both of which looked as though multiple Towers could fit inside. As they entered Soltador proper he couldn’t believe what he saw.
    Food!
    There were giant piles of food everywhere! Apples, corn, potatoes, onions, strawberries, cabbages, carrots, celery, and other plants he didn’t even recognize were piled atop each other at wooden stands the size of his wigwam. Vast slabs of salted meats hung from hooks, bleeding onto the cobblestones below. He licked his lips unconsciously. Why was nobody eating anything! Everyone was just talking or shouting at each other and putting strange little trinkets on tables.
    Out of the corner of his eye he thought he saw something blue sticking up, but when he turned to look it had vanished. Had he really seen it or was he just imagining things?
    He shook his head. Would he ever understand this world?
    >> Malvare 10/30/10(Sat)19:41 No.12626084
    They made their way slowly through the maze of people and mountains and food. Sir Vay was delighted in not explaining anything, content to enjoy the little goblin’s amazement. Eventually they made their way to the center of the city and the king’s castle. Learnwise saw that there seemed to be a small river surrounding an outer wall with no way across.
    “How do we get inside?” He asked.
    “We wait.” Sir Vay answered. “They just need to lower the drawbridge.”
    And in a few moments, to the goblin’s immense delight, the gate seemed to lower itself, stretching all the way across the river and down before them. Seeing this feat of engineering made Learnwise wonder if King Molossus was a god, but also just why he needed so much protection. Was he really that weak?

    >I feel like such a slow typist
    >> Anonymous 10/30/10(Sat)19:46 No.12626121
    >>12626084

    Don't. For that quality you are rather fast.
    >> Malvare 10/30/10(Sat)19:49 No.12626142
    >>12626121
    Yay ego boost.
    >> Malvare 10/30/10(Sat)19:58 No.12626223
    When they had crossed two more knights approached them on foot, each bearing much fancier armor and weaponry. No doubt these were the king’s bodyguards. Again, why all the protection?
    “Your appointment with the king?” The knight asked, eyeing Learnwise suspiciously.
    “I have an urgent message from Lord Denaln about a massive impending invasion.” Sir Vay brandished a sealed piece of parchment. “And I assure you, this goblin is quite key.”
    “Very well, you may enter. His majesty has no appointments for this hour.” The knight said, not once breaking his gaze on Learnwise. Sir Vay and the other knights dismounted, and as more squires lifted Learnwise down the goblin stuck his tongue out at the knight.
    “Don’t do that again.” Sir Vay warned him. “That’s an offense that could get you killed. You are to show the utmost respect for his majesty.”
    “All right, all right.”
    “Don’t speak unless spoken to.”
    Learnwise nodded but glared at the knight as they entered the castle.
    >> Malvare 10/30/10(Sat)19:59 No.12626231
    The castle seemed even more massive on the inside than the outside. The floor was expertly engraved with scenes that Learnwise assumed told the tale of Soltador’s founding, all of which depicted massive armies slaughtering each other. On the walls were massive tapestries that Learnwise could only wonder just how much time it took to make them. He was startled to see statues, carved perfectly and immaculately, of knights in pate, helmets removed. They were so lifelike that he wouldn’t be surprised if hey simply walked away from their stands. They approached a magnificent pair of mahogany doors. Two guards on either side forbade entry.
    “His majesty is not present yet.” They said. “Please wait for just a few minutes.”
    Learnwise tapped his moccasin impatiently. He had heard so much about this king, and he was kept waiting. But then he stopped himself. He was just a lowly goblin, getting impatient for the most powerful man in the world! His own gall surprised him. Finally the guards allowed them through and Learnwise gasped.
    >> Malvare 10/30/10(Sat)20:08 No.12626312
    King Molossus was not weak at all. He was gigantic, taller than any creature Learnwise had ever seen in his life. His face was scarred and stern, his black beard adding to his mystique, his shoulder-length hair adding an air of barbarism. He wore a suit of armor dark, dark blue designed with an eagle motif, with massive shoulder plates that looked like wings. It was all so massive Learnwise couldn’t imagine anyone moving in it, yet he wore it with ease. At his side was the most amazing sword any goblin had ever seen; not only was it larger than Learnwise, it was glowing blue. He sat on a golden throne encrusted with hundreds of jewels, and the symbol of the eagle was engraved above his head.
    The man radiated an aura of power so great that Learnwise bowed instinctively.
    By the throne’s side stood a woman in white and blue robes. She had long, red hair, blue eyes, and a golden diadem. She held a long wooden staff topped with two ivory wings. A subtler sense of power came from her, but it was so dwarfed by the king that Learnwise could hardly tell it was there.
    She and the goblin, for an instant, made eye contact. She directed up with her eyes. Learnwise was sure she had communicated something, but he could not tell what.
    >> Anonymous 10/30/10(Sat)20:14 No.12626357
    Sleepy time now! I really hope this survives or gets archived somewhere.
    >> Malvare 10/30/10(Sat)20:18 No.12626395
    “For what mad purpose has a knight brought a lowly goblin before me?” King Molossus’ voice boomed and echoed throughout the royal hall. Sir Vay fell to one knee.
    “My king, great is your wisdom, power, and judgment. I have come bearing news of impending disaster.”
    “The disaster that I see is the filth before me! Explain yourself, goblin, or I will smite you where you stand!”
    Learnwise was astonished. The sheer strength of the king’s voice was bringing him to tears. He could not bear to look at the Steeldoom. “I—I am the—“
    “Look at me when you speak, wretch!” King Molossus roared. “Do not provoke my wrath!”
    Learnwise did his best to explain everything that had transpired. When he had finished he was both mentally and physically exhausted. He looked at Sir Vay for support, but the knights were kneeling, heads bowed. Again he made eye contact with the woman, who quickly looked up. Was there something behind him?
    The king stood and laughed a terrifying, mirthless laugh. “So you come to me, goblin, representing the Honeyrumble, asking me to deploy my armies just so your pathetic excuse for a village isn’t destroyed?” He spat on the floor. “You make me sick. Your kind is the scum of the world! Not fit to breathe the same air as I! Go back to your honey and tell everyone that if they do not perish by hobgoblin then soon they will die by my blade!”
    “Your majest—“ Sir Vay protested, but the king stomped his foot into the floor, rocking the entire room.
    “DO NOT PROTEST AGAINST ME, KNIGHT! YOUR KING’S WORD IS LAW! NOW BEGONE!”
    >> Anonymous 10/30/10(Sat)20:18 No.12626397
    BUMP
    >> Anonymous 10/30/10(Sat)20:20 No.12626411
    Dude, what happened to the Buttdragger Den?
    >> Malvare 10/30/10(Sat)20:21 No.12626423
    >>12626411
    Didn't get doubles til just now bro
    >> Malvare 10/30/10(Sat)20:31 No.12626503
    They ran as fast as their legs could carry them out of the royal hall and back through the corridor, past the statues, tapestries, and engravings, back to the entrance.
    “I-I don’t understand what just happened.” Sir Mize said.
    “Our king has never—I don’t…” Sir Vay stopped. He pointed at Learnwise. “I’m sorry.”
    The goblin felt something on his cheek. He was crying, from fear or despair he did not know. King Molossus was truly more frightening than the hobbs, who seemed so distant as to be irrelevant. Now the threat was the Eagle Kingdom and its mad monarch, ready and willing to slaughter everyone.
    A middle-aged blonde man approached from the hall. His robes were white with a single golden signet of golden cross-shape with four circles around it, and were so clean as to almost shimmer in the light. “Hm, seems you picked a bad time to speak with his majesty.”
    “Is the man insane?” Sir Mize asked incredulously.
    “Not at all! This is a part of all royal courts, you’ll see.” The man nodded. “I am Pasellius, the envoy of Farodia.”
    “Farodia?” Sir Vant asked. “Never heard of it.”
    “Well, our publicity isn’t great despite being the most powerful and vast empire in the world.” Pasellius shrugged. “Just wait a few moments…”
    He started gazing at the sky. After a few minutes he pointed. “Aha, there we go. Now the truth will out.”
    >> Malvare 10/30/10(Sat)20:39 No.12626573
    “What is it? What did you see?” Learnwise asked, wiping his eyes.
    “By the Emperor, a talking goblin!” Was Pasellius’ helpful reply.
    Suddenly the king appeared at the end of the hall, striding quickly towards them. The knights and goblin tensed up, but the envoy stayed relaxed.
    “Are you all right? I’m so sorry about what just happened.” The king said in a gentle voice to Learnwise. “Come back in, I must explain everything.”
    Learnwise and the knights exchanced confused glances, but Pasellius sauntered away knowingly. They cautiously followed the king through the hall and back to the throne room.
    “There was a spy.” Said the woman with the staff. “A fairy, listening on our meeting, on the ceiling. I don’t think it knows we knew about it.”
    “A fairy?” Learnwise asked, looking up.
    “Well that’s what I just said, isn’t it?” The woman responded.
    “Quiet now.” Said the king. He sighed. “It is unfortunate, but the Queen of the Fae thinks she needs to be privy to all the royal going ons of the world. False information is more damaging than no information, so I give her spies the impression I am a madman who lashes out at any and everything around him. I must apologize for what I did, but there was no way to alert you without blowing the cover.”
    >> Anonymous 10/30/10(Sat)20:39 No.12626574
    Hey, I've been busy all day so I've only had a chance to read 3 posts in. Now I have to go to a Halloween party, so, if this thread is dead when I get back, will the story be on your deviantart account?
    >> Malvare 10/30/10(Sat)20:46 No.12626633
    >>12626574
    If someone doesn't archive it I guess.
    >> Malvare 10/30/10(Sat)20:53 No.12626693
    Learningwise was more confused than ever now. Spies? Fairies? Empires? He had no idea what was going on, but at least now the king seemed friendly. “Your majesty, if I can ask—“
    “I am deploying two-thousand soldiers to the Harmony Forest.” The king interrupted him. “I will eradicate the hobgoblin menace. We have a common goal, you and I. Cridon will not fall so long as I rule, and neither shall Honeyrumble or any other goblin village.”
    Learnwise blinked.
    “Of course, all of a sudden there will be a vast amount of unclaimed territory around Lake Perry.”
    “So you are expanding the kingdom?” Sir Vay suggested.
    Molossus shook his head. “No, I will consolidate it. The Eagle Kingdom must grow, but not solely through annexation.” He turned to Learnwise. “I am giving it to you.”
    Everyone in the room, Sir Vay, Sir Mize, Sir Eptishus, the woman, and the eavesdropping guards turned to stare at the king.
    “What?”
    Molossus kept his composure. “Territorial expansion is worthless if it is unsustainable. Political expansion can last for far longer. I will build around that lake a goblin kingdom, friendly to the Eagle Kingdom. We will grow and trade together, helping each other in this dangerous world. You goblins won’t attack my citizens, we will not slaughter your people, and the hobgoblins will be gone.”
    “I don’t even…” Learnwise failed to say anything coherent.
    “It is already decided.” Molossus said. “We will do all we can to help goblinkind. Royal Wizard Naphi, if you would come with me, we can begin the arrangements. This is a massive undertaking, after all. Guards, see to it that Learnswise and these knights are given the royal treatment.”

    >Taking a dinner/posture break, back in a bit
    >> Malvare 10/30/10(Sat)21:15 No.12626886
    >Back
    >Work continues
    >Everyone liking it so far?
    >> Anonymous 10/30/10(Sat)21:19 No.12626930
    It's really good keep going
    >> Malvare 10/30/10(Sat)21:28 No.12627001
    Life was very confusing for Learnwise. In the past few moons he won over the cutest goblin ever, set out on a journey to the Steeldoom, been horribly tortured in Tower, learned about just how big the world really is, been to Soltador, passed piles of delicious but ignored food, seen a bridge go up and down, been ridiculed by a king, found out about empires and fairies and spies and suddenly become part of a plan to form a new kingdom. Now he was in his new room, up at the top of a tower, looking out of a window and noticing the ocean for the first time.
    How had he not seen it before? Water that goes on forever, blue and beautiful. He had no idea such a thing existed, but that was becoming a depressingly common thought. He saw the ships floating atop and marveled at how they could so such a thing while being so large. A thought occurred to him: What was under the water?
    There was a knock on the door. “Yes?” Learnwise asked, not turning from the open window.
    “I’m here to help.”
    Learnwise looked at the door. “You’re here to what?”
    “I’m here to help. Let me in please.”
    The voice was an odd monotone that Learnwise found weird, but he hopped off the stool he was standing on, carried it over to the door, set it down, stood on it, jiggled the handle, and was knocked over when the person on the other side opened it fully.
    Learnwise stared up at yet another person he didn’t understand. It was a… human, presumably, wrapped up in large blue robes with a blue cloak on the back. The figure wore blue gloves on hands that were hardly visible under oversized sleeves, a blue scarf around his lower face, massive bifocals that covered the rest of his face, and a strange, blue pointed hat that the goblin recognized as the one he had seen by the piles of food earlier.
    “Can I… help you?”
    >> Malvare 10/30/10(Sat)21:35 No.12627059
    “No. I’m here to help you.” Replied the figure. The two stared at each other.
    “Well?” Learnwise said impatiently.
    “What?” The figure said innocently.
    “Help me up!”
    The figure propped the goblin back on his feet. Admittedly Learnwise didn’t need help with this, but this fellow was certainly being irritating.
    “Is that all the help that you require?” Asked the figure.
    “I… yes?”
    “Then goodbye.” The figure swiftly turned around and walked out the door.
    Learnwise ran after him. This guy, though annoying, had piqued his curiosity. “Human! Who are you?”
    The figure turned around and walked back up the stairs. “I am Timinar. I am a wizard.” He proceeded to turn back and to the stairs.
    “A wizard like that woman with the king?”
    Timinar stopped. “I am not as powerful as Royal Wizard Naphi, but I am a wizard given that it is my chosen vocation just as it is her own chosen vocation.”
    Learnwise cocked his head. He just could not make sense of this person.
    >> Malvare 10/30/10(Sat)21:44 No.12627125
    Learnwise cocked his head. He just could not make sense of this person. “If you’re supposed to help why did you walk away like that?”
    “Because I helped.”
    “You’re the one who knocked me over in the first place!”
    Timinar looked at the floor. “I apologize for any incidental offenses I may have committed in the short time we have known each other.”
    There was an awkward silence.
    “What does a wizard do?” Leanwise asked. “Help people?”
    “A wizard performs wizardry.”
    Learnwise stared at Timinar.
    “I can cast magic spells.”
    “Magic?” Leanwise would believe anything now. “Really?”
    “Yes.” Timinar said from behind Learnwise. The goblin turned around in shock, looked back where Timinar had previously been, then to the wizard, to where he had been, then the wizard.
    “How did you—“
    “I teleported.” Timinar shrugged. “Or rather I abused the primordial cosmic forces that make up the very foundations of reality and proceeded to use them for a wholly unnecessary display of mystic competence that happened to be not surprisingly tiring.”
    “…what?”
    >> Anonymous 10/30/10(Sat)21:49 No.12627150
         File1288489756.jpg-(62 KB, 208x254, fuck yeah.jpg)
    62 KB
    >mfw I looked at the knights' names

    Also, very nice story OP
    >> Malvare 10/30/10(Sat)21:53 No.12627169
    “I’m feeling very tired from teleporting.” Timinar said. Learnwise couldn’t tell if the wizard was yawning or not. Actually, he couldn’t really tell Timinar’s gender.
    “Teleportation is an extremely dangerous and tiring magic, given the innumerable factors involved in not accidentally being in the same place as a given solid. In fact, my casual usage of such power may indicate that I am not actually fit to be a wizard and should, for the benefit of those around me, dispose of my cornathaum and stop practicing magic entirely.” Timinar continued. “But that train of thought makes me feel depressed, and I don’t want to feel depressed.”
    Learnwise eyed the door to his room and wished he was just a little bit closer. “Then don’t think that?” He suggested unhelpfully.
    Timinar clapped his fist into the palm of his hand. “A splendid idea!”
    “And if you’re feeling tired you should go to sleep, probably somewhere else.” Learnwise suggested rather blatantly. This went right over Timinar’s head.
    “Another good idea!”
    “Why don’t you act upon it?”
    “I’m not that tired. Efrempti isn’t either.”
    Learnwise put a hand to his forehead. “But—what—who is Efrempti?”
    A raven appeared on Learnwise’ hand.
    >> Malvare 10/30/10(Sat)22:07 No.12627276
    “Gah! Get it off get this bird off!” Learnwise flailed about wildly, throwing the bird straight into the wall. It crumpled to the floor and lay still.
    Both goblin and wizard stared at the corpse.
    “Efrempti?” Timinar said.
    The corpse vanished and the raven appeared on the brim of his hat, good as new. “Greetings, young goblin.” It said.
    “Your dead bird is talking!” Learnwise pointed, though he was less surprised than he felt he ought to be.
    “I am not, in fact, dead. I am a bonded spirit, a familiar, if you will, to this wizard before you.” The raven’s voice was deep and matter-of-fact. “Seeing as most of the successful nations of the world employ wizards as helpers and advisors, King Molossus has been generous enough to hire us to act as your new kingdom’s wizard. Seeing as you are currently the sole representative of your government, this means we work for you.”
    “I saw you by all the food this morning.” Learnwise recalled. “Did you already know about all of this?”
    Timinar shook his head while Efrempti responded. “No, we did not. We have only arrived today, just like you. However, as wizards are rather rare, we were noticed quickly and given this opportunity.”
    “I recently came into a large sum of money—very large sum of money—and I wish to use it constructively.” Timinar explained. “A position in government would suit my purposes nicely.”
    “Also you want protection from the elf.” Efrempti added.
    “I also want protection from the elf.”
    Learnwise simply accepted this at face value. “All right. You want protection from the elf.”
    >> Malvare 10/30/10(Sat)22:16 No.12627352
    Stillbush and Turtlecrack finally made it back to Honeyrumble. They had run like never before, away from Tower, the Steeldoom, Cridon, all the way across the Flatline, back through the brush, and straight for the village. They managed the three day journey in a mere two.
    “So…huff…what do you think…Learnwise is doing?” Stillbush asked, leaning against a tree to catch his breath.
    “I don’t know, but I don’t wanna find out!” Turtlecrack said, looking backwards. “I just wanna crawl into my stickpile and sleep.”
    “Yeah…huff…isn’t that the truth…”
    The two decided to press on at a slower pace now that they were so close to home. The relished all the familiar sights, from the ferns to the berrybushes to the mushrooms to the new beehives on the trees.
    “Pretty soon they’ll have some more honey.” Turtlecrack mused. “I wonder if we’ll be alive to get it.”
    “Honey sounds so good right now…” Stillbush licked his lips.
    “I wonder how Applethrow will react when we tell her where Learnwise went?” Turtlecrack giggled to himself. “She’ll come crying into my arms!”
    “No, she’ll come to me!” Stillbush challenged him. “I’m the stronger and bigger one!”
    “I’m the smarter one, and you know she likes smarts.” Turtlerock smirked. Stillbush was about to shove him when Turtlerock put a finger to his mouth. “What was that noise? It came from the village!”
    “Oh no!”
    “Quietly!”
    >> Malvare 10/30/10(Sat)22:25 No.12627405
    They crept from bush to bush, tree to tree, keeping out of sight as best they could. Soon they got close enough to hear voices.
    “Who is it? They sound familiar?”
    “The hobbs?”
    Turtlerock stood up. “No! Not the hobbs! It can’t be the hobbs!” He grabbed Stillbush’s spear and ran out into the village. The larger goblin struggled to his feet and ran in behind him.
    Before them the goblins watched in awe as a massive tent was being erected over the entirety of the village. Steeldoom soldiers were everywhere, patrolling for danger. One acknowledged Turtlerock and Stillbush with a curt nod. A man with red hair and beard, and eaglesque armor oversaw the construction with Royal Wizard Naphi by his side.
    “Tell the king that Campe Honeyrumble is going smoothly, and that in half-an-hour we’ll be ready for supplies.” He said.
    “Yes, General Valiance.” She teleported back to Soltador.
    Stillbush and Turtlecrack stared at each other in utter bewilderment.
    >> Malvare 10/30/10(Sat)22:30 No.12627442
    >Okay guys, we're at a point where I can ask this. Should this be a multi-act story? If so, then basically I'll keep writing this every Saturday until we're done, so long as I know people are reading it.
    >If it should be multi-act, then someone should archive it on sup/tg/. I don't want to HAVE to direct people to my DA.
    >If you want it to be one act, then that's really about it.
    >Either way, I'm not done for tonight. Taking another, short break though.
    >> Anonymous 10/30/10(Sat)22:34 No.12627468
    multi-act story, I choose you.
    >> Anonymous 10/30/10(Sat)22:36 No.12627483
    bump, for I am tired and cannot be bothered to learn how to archive in a night. If you wanna archive the story as well and know how, feel free. otherwise, whatever...
    >> Anonymous 10/30/10(Sat)22:37 No.12627492
    >>12627483
    also, I vote for multi-act
    >> "multiact" sounds like a brand of detergent 10/30/10(Sat)22:42 No.12627542
    >>12627442

    This is awesome. Multi-act!
    >> "multiact" sounds like a brand of detergent 10/30/10(Sat)22:57 No.12627631
    >>12627592

    Bump.

    >>flegans liable

    To what, Captchan?
    >> Malvare 10/30/10(Sat)22:59 No.12627653
    >Okay, we'll do multi-act. But if you wanna make sure I keep at it, bug me on DA. I don't use it for much else anyway and it'll keep me motivated to finish this.
    >Also: What to call this for the archives? http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive.html?showall=1
    >Post your ideas while I write moar
    >> Malvare 10/30/10(Sat)23:14 No.12627773
    “This is outrageous!” Emberneed fumed. “Groundrock you’ve gone too far! The Undercandle will not stand for this!”
    “This wasn’t what I wanted.” Groundrock replied calmly. “I was under the impression that we would simply be receiving aid for defense.”
    “Well you were obviously wrong!” Chief Dendoubles of the Buttdragger Clan yelled.
    The other chieftains were silent.
    “I don’t think he’s a real chief.” Chief Fieldflow stated to everyone.
    “Get him out of here.” Nutgore waved Dendoubles away. Two goblins with spears picked Dendoubles up by the arms and dragged him off.
    “I’m a real chief! The Buttdragger Clan is very honorable!”
    “Surely.” Emberneed coughed. “Now where were we?”
    General Valiance and his aide were the only two present sitting in chairs and not piles of straw. Not coincidentally, they were the only non-goblins.
    “Do you have any idea what just happened? I don’t understand a word they’re saying.” Valiance whispered to his aide, who shook his head.
    “The Steeldoom are kicking us off our ancestral land, throwing us out without anything!” Emberneed yelled. “We cannot allow this to happen! Who cares about the lake that the hobbs are around? This is our land, we will not move!”
    The chieftains nodded in agreement.
    “But what can we do?” Oakspine said resignedly. “We are less capable of standing up to the Steeldoom than the hobbs. Oh, Honeyrumble, if only you had never conceived this ill-designed plot!”
    “It was our only hope! I could not just stand by and do nothing as the hobbs kill our goblings!” Groundrock clenched his club tightly. “I knew the risks, I made the mistake, but shouting about blame will not solve our problems!”
    >> Malvare 10/30/10(Sat)23:26 No.12627907
    Learnwise and Timinar walked towards the meeting. Efrempti was perched on the top of Timinar’s cornathaum.
    “Excuse me, noble chieftains and elders of the ten tribes.” Learnwise cleared his throat and motioned to Timinar. “Now, we have been working on finding out as much as possible about Lake Perry before we make a final decision. I want to assure all of you that King Molossus has sworn that we will not be forced to leave if we don’t want to go. This is up to each individual clan and chieftain. Nobody is forcing you to move.”
    Timinar spread his hands wide apart and a flat blue square flickered between them.
    “Now our wizard, Timinar, will help me show you what is going.” Learnwise said. “First, we will design the structure of government. We can ask for advice from the Eagle Kingdom, but this is our future and our decision. Now, this is Lake Perry.”
    An image of the lake appeared on the blue square. The land was lush and verdant, dripping with the proverbial milk and honey. The chieftains all visibly leaned forward at the image.
    “Now the hobbs currently have all of this. The Eagle Kingdom is going to help us take it and found ourselves our own kingdom there. Now, this is what we currently have.”
    A wigwam replaced the lake on the square.
    “This is what they want to build for us.”
    An image of the houses from Cridon appeared on the square next to the wigwam. The chieftains mumbled amongst themselves.
    “And this is what the chieftains get.”
    An image of a castle, similar to but smaller than Molossus’, appeared.
    “Well what are we waiting for?” Emberneed asked. “Those hobbs won’t kill themselves!”
    >> Malvare 10/30/10(Sat)23:39 No.12628076
    “This is an outrage Molossus!” The projection of the elven queen, Esoterica, crossed her arms. The elven queen was amazingly beautiful, with pale skin, blue eyes, and ponytail of blonde hair reaching down her back. She wore black robes with blue cuffs. “You know that Koholon is on the verge of collapse and you offer us, your stalwart allies, a pittance of aid, while you offer those filthy creatures who’ve done nobody any good all your resources! Are you doing this specifically to offend your allies?”
    “Aye!” Agreed the projection of King Hammerhead the dwarf, who was dressed in full adamantium plate, a large warhammer in hand. “We t’aint on good terms with tah goblins either! They be sieging us and snatchin’ our children all the time!”
    “My friends, I assure you, I did not mean to slight either of you.” King Molossus said, speaking to the others using Naphi.
    “Oh? Then what did you mean to do? Because you’ve done a good job of angering us!” Esoterica ran a hand through her hair agitatedly.
    “We dwarves don’t usually agree with tae elves aboot anything, but she’s right lad.”
    King Molossus sighed. “Naphi, are there any fairies around?”
    “None, my lord.”
    “Then I will explain why I am doing this.” King Molossus took a deep breath and began.
    >> Malvare 10/30/10(Sat)23:51 No.12628191
    “My father grew up as the son of a mercenary, surrounded by death, destruction, and despair. He never received a respite from death. And he saw that we are all united in death, and in suffering. It seems to be the only common thread between all the races of the world, that we all must suffer and then die. Goblin, human, elf, dwarf, it didn’t matter. We all fall in the end. So he vowed to create a place where peace reigned supreme, where anyone, no matter their race, could come and be freed from suffering, from anguish, from despair. That is why he allied with Koholon and the Boat of Order; to show tha, if we but worked together, we could create this wonderful kingdom. He sent me out when I was young to fight for him. We won our freedom through blood! So many lives were lost, friends, family, enemies… his mission is now my mission. I will create a land where anyone, be they human, dwarf, elf, goblin, hobgoblin, orc, ogre, fairy, or any other race, may come and live in peace. And so I find now that these goblin tribes are just barely surviving in my land, just barely lasting from one day to the next while we prosper? How could I not help them become what they need to be? They need peace. You need peace. We all need peace. Even the hobgoblins will be spared. We will not commit genocide. When they have been defeated, I will insist the survivors be allowed to stay on their land.”
    Queen Esoterica and High Thane Hammerhead were silent for a moment.
    “Very well. But please, Koholon needs you.” Her projection vanished.
    Hammerhead laughed. “Good speech, lad. Ah’ll drink tae that.”
    Molossus smirked. “You’ll drink to anything.”
    “Aye, ah’ll drink tae that too, but with my new goblin allies.
    >> Malvare 10/31/10(Sun)00:08 No.12628318
    “We only have a limited time frame in which to defeat the hobgoblins.” General Valiance said, pacing back and forth in front of the chieftains and their military commanders. He was an impressive sight, but only Groundrock could actually understand him. Stillbush and Turtlecrack were providing translation.
    “The ideal time is late spring or early summer.” Valiance explained. “That way you can take advantage of the growing season. You’ve never farmed before, so you’ll need plenty of time to learn if you want to survive winter. Fortunately we’re here to help you. The important thing is that you all are ready to move in once the hobbs have been defeated to maximize your settling time. Now, according to the reports the design for your new government is, lacking a better term… well, lacking. You need to get this organized before you move in to Lake Perry, or the entire operation will fail. Do we have any proposals?”
    “I should be in charge!” Emberneed stood up. Valiance got the point without the translations.
    “That’s exactly what we don’t want happening! You need to work together, cooperate, if you want to survive! The Eagle Kingdom can only provide you with so much.”
    He clapped his hands together. “What I’m saying is, leave the military part to us. You guys have the hard task ahead of you."
    >> Malvare 10/31/10(Sun)00:20 No.12628450
    Learnwise and Applethrow had finally found time to just enjoy each other’s company. The two goblins could hardly ever spend time together except at night, because so much work followed Learnwise around (literally, in the case of Timinar). But now they sat together in the same tree where Learnwise had sliced the hive so long ago.
    “I’ve never been this high up before.” Applethrow said, looking down. “It makes me feel a little scared.”
    “It’s not a long drop, you’d be fine.” Learnwise said, idly turning his blade over in his hands. “But the real reason you’re not in danger is because I’m here to catch you if you fall.”
    Applethrow giggled. “Yeah. It’s too bad there’s no hive around or you could get me some honey.”
    “That’d be great, wouldn’t it? Fight off those vile bees, plunder their honey and give it to the best goblin in the world.”
    They snuggled together.
    “Learnwise?”
    “Yes?”
    “I don’t know if now is the time, but…”
    “But what?”
    She squeezed him tightly. “I’m pregnant!”
    >> Malvare 10/31/10(Sun)00:26 No.12628531
    “Congratulations.” Said a familiar voice. Learnswise groaned.
    “Now is not the time, Efrempti.”
    The raven, perched on the branch above them, cocked his head. “You’ll be a great father.”
    “Were you listening the entire time?” Learnswise asked irritably.
    “Yes, and it was very saccharine for my tastes. I prefer political and action scenes to romance, myself.”
    “Can’t you bother Timinar or something?”
    “Timinar is asleep.” Efrempti said matter-of-factly. “Without sleep he cannot concentrate and without concentration he cannot avoid accidentally ripping a hole within space and time. So I can’t bother him, and, well, here we are.”
    “We’re having a moment here…” Learnswise glared at the raven.
    “We’re in the calm before the storm, goblin. Just remember that now.”
    >> Malvare 10/31/10(Sun)00:39 No.12628656
    “So what’s the situation like?” Learnswise asked Timinar, who brought up the blue square again.
    “Well, the first thing we face is a war camp on this ridge. It’s relatively small, so it shouldn’t be too bad. Now, a few miles southeast we have a tower fortress This will be tougher to take, especially if we don’t want to destroy it for use later. But anyway, once we’ve taken the tower we have two choices. If we go north then we face another war camp guarding this bridge here. After that is a small fortress and a number of farms west of the bridge. Northwest is another war camp, and due north is yet another. East of the bridge is a small series of docks that isn’t at all defended, northeast of that is another farming fortress then another tower and two different war camps. Or, instead of the bridge we go along the southern shore of Lake Perry, we have a very small war camp here, then another poorly defended dock. Then we have another farming fortress, but this one has a tower too. From there is yet another war camp, then a loop around to another tower and then finally the big fortress of the hobgoblins. Either way, it’s not easy.”
    “Hm…” Learnswise thought for a bit. “What are you thinking about?”
    “I think there is some sort of magical prisoner in King Molossus’ dungeon. I can feel him.”
    “What does that have to do with anything?”
    >> Malvare 10/31/10(Sun)00:45 No.12628709
    >All right, I think I'm done for now. The war will take too much for me to do it tonight. Since I have a life, I'll be back on Saturday to continue this.
    >MAKE SURE TO BUG ME ABOUT THIS OR I WILL LOSE MOTIVATION.
    >Also bug me about my book.
    >I'm gonna go ahead and archive this, I don't have a title for the story as a whole yet, so post your ideas for titles. I'm waiting for about 15 or twenty something minutes.
    >If you had any critiques, post them. Since this wasn't beta read, there's definitely problems with it.
    >Thanks for reading and come back Saturday.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/10(Sun)00:47 No.12628727
         File1288500421.jpg-(22 KB, 200x310, 1285385791304.jpg)
    22 KB
    This is very good.
    >> Malvare 10/31/10(Sun)00:59 No.12628829
    >Steamsharks: The Road to Disembowling
    >I think I found the title
    >> Anonymous 10/31/10(Sun)04:41 No.12630723
    /bump for awesome story
    >> Malvare 10/31/10(Sun)10:31 No.12632144
    >It's up on sup/tg/ and DA
    >See you on Saturday
    >> Anonymous 10/31/10(Sun)11:19 No.12632308
    Good jorb!



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