Posting mode: Reply
Password(Password used for file deletion)
  • Supported file types are: GIF, JPG, PNG
  • Maximum file size allowed is 3072 KB.
  • Images greater than 250x250 pixels will be thumbnailed.
  • Read the rules and FAQ before posting.
  • ????????? - ??

  • File : 1285987550.jpg-(72 KB, 600x432, rt-ships-1.jpg)
    72 KB Rogue Trader Tablet !!0fEYB5hrFn3 10/01/10(Fri)22:45 No.12294425  
    Long live the Imperium of Man, for through its good graces you will do things no mere man would ever dream of. Long have you served in the Glorious Inquisition to pay back a favor of your father’s to Inquisitor Aushwitz of the Ordo Xenos. At long last the debt has been paid, and you have been returned to your home planet of Domus.

    Upon your return you are surprised to learn of your father’s homecoming gift. As the eldest son, you would be rightful heir to his rule as planetary governor. However, during your time in the service to the most holy Inquisition, your younger brother Judias has become your father’s favorite, and he intends to make Judias the next governor. In order to keep you busy and out of the picture, he has arranged for you to receive a Warrant of Trade, and become a Rogue Trader. As a merchant of the stars, you would be unable to become ruler of Domus, and may stay no longer than thirty days on the planet per Holy Terran year.

    Your new ship, the Igneus Aequitas, is a ship of the Domian fleet. The Igneus is a comparatively minor ship, and has been staffed with an odd assortment of people likewise too important to have killed, yet no longer desired on the planet Domus. You are currently in orbit, on the bridge of your ship surrounded by your new employees. They look at you expectantly, while the scanners of the ship show the planet below you and the rest of the Domus fleet in orbit nearby to send you a grand farewell.

    >What is your name?
    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)22:47 No.12294440
    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)22:48 No.12294447
    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)22:49 No.12294450
    fuck the name, pilot the ship into the governor's home
    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)22:50 No.12294463

    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)22:52 No.12294483
    >> Tablet !!0fEYB5hrFn3 10/01/10(Fri)22:54 No.12294496
    Dolemite Deadlift, Rogue Trader in the making. To your left is your archmilitant Ripley. A giant of a man, he seems to have a firm belief that who has the biggest hat is the most important. To your right is your seneschal. You don’t really know his name, but he is dressed and an inexplicitly nicely craft tuxedo, and has not moved since you arrived on the bridge. Every time you turn around, he seems to have moved back into your line of sight without you seeing him.

    >What do you do?
    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)22:54 No.12294500


    >> Name Frederick, Rogue Trader 10/01/10(Fri)22:56 No.12294511
    Frederick, of the newly founded Rogue Trader dynasty hailing from the planet Domus.
    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)22:59 No.12294535
    >Dolemite Deadlift
    oh my god that is awesome
    First things first, what are our current resources?
    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)22:59 No.12294538
    Call the seneschal a faggot, tell him to put his armor on, and begin punctuating orders with the smash of a thunder hammer against the deck.
    >> Tablet !!0fEYB5hrFn3 10/01/10(Fri)23:02 No.12294564
    To Armageddon! During your service in the Ordos, you where sent to the damnable red hellhole. Indeed, it was a mission you’d rather forget, because you came too close to dying for your liking several times over. Of course, it was completely worth it to see Jack ride that looted wagon right into the warboss.

    The ship begins to accelerate, and with a slight hum you begin to hear the warp engines begin to warm up. In a few moments the ship has entered to the warp, and you are on your way to Armageddon.
    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)23:03 No.12294575
    Ok. I guess... I'll take a nap now!
    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)23:05 No.12294584

    tour the ship, make sure everything is shipshape
    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)23:06 No.12294600
    Turns out everything is, in fact, dickshape.
    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)23:06 No.12294603




    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)23:07 No.12294612

    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)23:08 No.12294618
    >tour the ship, make sure everything is shipshape
    You do realize that would take several hundred years? And a heavily armed escort for the "lost decks".
    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)23:09 No.12294623
    No worries, I got a multi-melta.

    Plus, I'm already a level 5 DH character. You ever brought one of those into the game? Broken as fuck. I'll be fine.
    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)23:09 No.12294626
    You doubt captain Dolemite Deadlift?
    >> Tablet !!0fEYB5hrFn3 10/01/10(Fri)23:10 No.12294638
    That is a very good question. Turning to your seneschal, you ask him to give you a briefing of your resources. Almost instantaneously, he begins to list off various resources at your command. Your Warrant of Trade has several pacts tied along to it to various organizations, and your ship has been equipped with several powerful weapons. A raider class ship, it is one of the fastest ship this side of the Galactic core, and is capable of exceedingly fast warp jumps compared to similar sixed ships. However, this tends to strain the warp engine, and your plasma generators. The Igneus carries 20,000 men, and has a fighting complement of 9,000 men at arms, as well as 4,000 that are capable of combat if needed.
    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)23:13 No.12294654
    >9,000 men at arms
    >4,000 that are capable of combat if needed
    Tell the navigator to high tail it to Armageddon. We're loading this shit heap down with lasguns and Lemans.

    >company vigurity
    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)23:14 No.12294662
    Are we a real rogue trader with a writ from the Emperor, or just one of those new ones with not even half the authority?

    Also, send a message to our dad calling him a colossal dick for sending us off to pay his debts, and then giving the governorship to his other kid.

    In fact, I think we should find an Ork waaaagh, and tell the boss that there's great fighting to be had on Domus.
    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)23:16 No.12294681
    FUCK THAT. That kind of activity is for heretics. We fuck shit up for the Emprah. Stow that heresy for your death bed.
    >> Tablet !!0fEYB5hrFn3 10/01/10(Fri)23:16 No.12294682
    Weapon wise the ship has a Mars Pattern Macrocannon, as well as a Titanforge Lance weapons, and is capable of rather good maneuvering. The armory is decently stocked, carrying a couple hundred plasma guns, fifty melta guns, and three hundred chimeras. Oddly enough, there seems to be a rhino, with a bow on it. It has a tag as well, signed, “A parting gift for you. May the Emperor protect, Judias.”
    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)23:18 No.12294696
    That Rhino is probably rigged to explode. Have the tech priests bless it with the rite of departure and then space it.
    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)23:18 No.12294698

    That cunt probably talked dad into cutting us out of the governorship. Scan the rhino for any possible death traps, then space it just to be sure.
    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)23:18 No.12294699

    >three hundred chimeras



    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)23:18 No.12294703
    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)23:18 No.12294705
    Fucking hivemind! Brofist.
    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)23:18 No.12294706
    He didn't send us off to pay his debts. He just likes our brother more than us. Well fuck him, we don't need his damn governorship anyway. We're gonna be the best damn mercenary commander in the entire segmentum or our name isn't MOTHERFUCKIN' DOLEMITE DEADLIFT!
    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)23:20 No.12294717
    Inquisitor Aushwitz
    When your mentors name sounds like a concentration camp its probably not a good sign.
    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)23:20 No.12294722
    Delicious melta spam. I can almost smell the incinerating heretic flesh. It smells like... victory.
    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)23:21 No.12294725
    After that can we go on an expedition to the crone worlds to gather soulstones?

    I want to see if we can't score a few Fire Prisms for our arsenal.
    >> Tablet !!0fEYB5hrFn3 10/01/10(Fri)23:21 No.12294726
    Hm, a tour would do nicely. Definently let you introduce yourself to the men, and get to know them. Perhaps get in their good graces so they won’t think of mutiny…

    You inform the seneschal of your plan, and without blinking he lists off several options for you to go to first. Where do you go first?
    >Meet the Explorator
    >Meet the Missionary
    >Meet the Astropath
    >Meet the Crew
    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)23:22 No.12294732
    The crew.
    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)23:23 No.12294739


    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)23:23 No.12294741
         File1285989798.jpg-(193 KB, 750x710, PissCanBloom.jpg)
    193 KB
    Ain't gonna be no extra-heretical xenos love in this thread.
    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)23:24 No.12294754
    And then the Astropath. He has seen the Emperor in person. And his eyes melted out of their sockets for it. Conversations with psychotics is always fun.
    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)23:25 No.12294762
    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)23:26 No.12294765

    Who said anything about love? I just want guns.


    Seconding crew
    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)23:27 No.12294766
    >> Captain Rhodes 10/01/10(Fri)23:27 No.12294770
         File1285990028.jpg-(186 KB, 900x519, bros hell yeah.jpg)
    186 KB
    Check out the Explorator, see if he's in good with the enginseers, and then proceed to get in good with the enginseers. The bro-ier we are with the Adeptus Mechanicus, the better techno-bullshit we can get out grubby hands on.

    Think of the meltas!
    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)23:27 No.12294772
    Everything is awesome. Forever.
    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)23:28 No.12294776
    Bet you love their guns.
    >> Tablet !!0fEYB5hrFn3 10/01/10(Fri)23:29 No.12294780
    The crew it is! Obviously, as they’re the ones keeping the ship going you alive, they’ve got to be first to know you’re in charge, and your they’re to lead them to ADVENTURE! Of course, due to the fact they run the ship not everyone can come to your grand meeting where you introduce yourself, but you have it broadcast over the ship so that people can tune in to watch it live.

    You turn to the seneschal and inform him of your choice. A second later there is smoke where he was just standing and he’s disappeared. Three hours later your standing on a just constructed stage in a large auditorium, addressing a crowd of roughly seven hundred people. As they all watch you approach the mike, what do you say?
    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)23:31 No.12294799
    "Ladies and Gentlemen, you have found yourselves on this ship for various reasons and from many differing backgrounds. But, no matter how different your pasts may have been, we all share a common future, TO GET FILTHY STINKING RICH!"
    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)23:32 No.12294803
    "Even when trapped by karma's cycle, the dreams we left behind will open the door! Even if the Universe stands in our way, our seething blood will determine what will be! We will break through Time and Space! And defy all who would stop us to grab hold of our path! JUST WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK I AM!?"
    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)23:34 No.12294814
    "My friends, we are now brothers aboard this spacecraft, brothers sharing this small house adrift in the great sea of space.

    Let me tell you about brothers. Brothers are fucking jackasses. They lie and twist your father against you, ruining your name and stealing your birthright! Because of my brother, I was denied that which was promised to me!

    But I am not the first brother to be betrayed by his father! No, the first brothers to be so betrayed were the Primarchs of the mighty Astartes. Their loyalty was returned by abandonment when their father, the Emperor, abandoned the Great Crusade and retreated to Terra!

    When their father left them, who did the Primarchs turn to? When our families betray us, who can we turn to?!

    There is only one answer, my brothers. There are powers out there who care not about lineage or personal ties, but only about the deeds of greatness you perform! These powers, the Gods of the Empyrean, are the only beings worthy of pledging service to! Now, with me! We go to the Eye to consecrate ourselves and our ship before the Great Powers, and strike back at our betrayers!"
    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)23:34 No.12294815

    Loyal subjects of the Emperor, Crew, and Comrades!

    I am not a fair man. I am not a nice man. I am Dolomite Deadlift, and I am an utterly mad son of a bitch. You are here because working for a man like me gives you a chance at glory, honour, the opportunity to unleash unrestrained hellfire against primitive Xenos and enough money to fill a lake with amasec and whores and swim in it the rest of your life.

    Work for me, work hard and I promise you'll get that chance.
    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)23:34 No.12294817

    "Now, let's not beat around the bush here. Xenos worlds will be raided. Archeotech plundered. Heretics razed. But let not one man or woman aboard this ship wonder at their duty - first and foremost, TO THE GOD EMPEROR OF MANKIND, AND SO HELP YOU IF I FIND OUT A SINGLE ONE OF YOU IS A HERETIC AND I WILL FIND YOU IF YOU ARE OUT THERE, YOU CANNOT HIDE FROM THE CLEANSING LIGHT OF PURITY."
    >> Captain Rhodes 10/01/10(Fri)23:35 No.12294825
    I like the cut of this man's jib.
    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)23:36 No.12294831
    That sounds like heresy talk. You don't talk no heresy talk 'round Dolemite Deadlift cracka'.
    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)23:36 No.12294833
         File1285990581.gif-(2 MB, 341x321, 1284682489413.gif)
    2 MB
    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)23:37 No.12294836
    To make a point, he blasts a psyker in the front row with a melta.
    >> Tablet !!0fEYB5hrFn3 10/01/10(Fri)23:37 No.12294840

    Your hot blooded promises of money and asskicking works the crowd up, and you find many admirers in the throngs of people. Damn, you knew there was a reason you were the face man of your cell. Some of the older people don’t seem to be giving your DYNAMIC SPEECH any attention. Odds are they’re just disillusioned with such extravagant promises. None the less, you seem to have the crew’s loyalty. For now.

    >What next?
    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)23:38 No.12294849
    Is the arch-militant female? If so, try to get it on with her.
    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)23:38 No.12294853
    Let's talk to the Astropath.
    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)23:38 No.12294854
         File1285990737.gif-(1.86 MB, 176x172, 1284621069667.gif)
    1.86 MB

    >read these in order

    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)23:39 No.12294859
    not this.
    >> Tablet !!0fEYB5hrFn3 10/01/10(Fri)23:39 No.12294860
    No Ripley is not. At least you hope not, under all that moustache and muscle.
    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)23:40 No.12294870

    loyalists gonna loyal.
    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)23:41 No.12294876


    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)23:41 No.12294877
    Is the Rogue Trader female?
    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)23:42 No.12294880

    Mention to the seneschal you'd like a word sometime later with the senior crew, once we've worked out where we're going and what the score will be. Guts and glory for the majority of the crew, but take a more reasoned tone with the NCO's, and let them know that we're not going to get them killed.

    We should talk to the Explorator about what it would take to get that Rhino turned into a Predator for use as a command tank, and if he knows of any promising sites where we can find archaeotech.
    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)23:43 No.12294892
    enlil and enki.
    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)23:44 No.12294897
         File1285991064.jpg-(12 KB, 280x305, yuki-nagato2.jpg)
    12 KB
    Yep, this is her.
    >> Tablet !!0fEYB5hrFn3 10/01/10(Fri)23:45 No.12294901
    To the astropath! The astropath’s hold is inside the bowls of the ship, behind walls of solid titanium and other various metals to protect him from whatever foul monsters of the warp would dare to try to enter your most blessed ship. Following your speech, the seneschal takes you to the elevatus, where you spend the better part of an hour waiting for it to arrive at its destination. The constant playing of that annoying music begins to grate on your nerves, and the fact the seneschal is just staring at you starts to get a little creepy.

    After suffering through that horrible ride, you find yourself outside the metal bulk head of the astropath’s chambers. What do you do?
    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)23:46 No.12294908

    Walk up to the door, lift my ceramite clad fist and knock loudly upon the door.

    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)23:47 No.12294913
    Knock on the bulkhead.
    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)23:47 No.12294919

    Ask our Astropath how long he's been in the service, and weather we should know anything about limits to his abilities.

    Also: >>12294880
    >> Tablet !!0fEYB5hrFn3 10/01/10(Fri)23:53 No.12294964
    You raise your first to knock on the door, when it begins to open on its own. You like to think that fog began to flow out from the room, because at least that would be normal creepy. This was not like that. Instead of some shriveled man in robes of the Astra Telepathica. Instead you find a emaciated women, with eerily white skin, and thin long blonde hair. Her eyes are closed, and for some reason you find yourself inordinately thankful for that, even though you don’t know why.

    After a moment of awkward silence between the two of you, she begins to say with a quivering voice that obviously hasn’t had much use, “I-I-I felt you coming. I kn-kn-knew that you were go-in-ing to knock, so I thought I’d save you the trouble.”
    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)23:55 No.12294973

    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)23:56 No.12294981
         File1285991789.jpg-(40 KB, 588x354, DRAMMMAAA.jpg)
    40 KB
    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)23:56 No.12294982
    Thank you ma'am, just thought I'd come down and see how you were doin'.
    Try to be less creeped out just in case she can read our mind and will harbor feelings of vengeance.
    >> Anonymous 10/01/10(Fri)23:57 No.12294984

    I'm the new captain of the ship. I wanted to talk to you to know more about your abilities and skills.
    >> Tablet !!0fEYB5hrFn3 10/02/10(Sat)00:02 No.12295013

    “Of c-c-course sir. I am miss Invidia, and it has been 13 years since I laid my eyes on our glorious Emperor. I have been on the Igneus for 10 years since then , working as the chief and only astropath of the ship.” Huh, she really seems to get it together when work is involved. You can tell she gets incredibly focused when she mentions the Emperor, as is only natural. Kind of reminds you of Fink, the psyker from your cell.
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)00:03 No.12295027

    Send a transmission to Armageddon, letting them know of our arrival in advance, and our intention to requisition men, and possibly battle tanks. Make sure she details that we do not require Chimeras.
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)00:05 No.12295039
    >Huh, she really seems to get it together when work is involved.
    This is very comforting. If we learn nothing else at least we know she can do her job.
    >> Tablet !!0fEYB5hrFn3 10/02/10(Sat)00:07 No.12295059
    “Right away sir.” With that said, she turns, and you make haste to leave. Man, she really just fucks with your head just by being around. The bulkhead reseals itself, and you find yourself in the hallway with the seneschal.

    >What do you do?
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)00:07 No.12295069
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)00:08 No.12295074

    It's time we checked out the plasma drives. Have you met our enginseer prime, seneschal?
    >> Captain Rhodes 10/02/10(Sat)00:10 No.12295092
    This. Head on down to the AdMech shrine and get to making friends with the techpriests.
    >> Tablet !!0fEYB5hrFn3 10/02/10(Sat)00:13 No.12295117
    To the explorator!

    Making sure to take the quickest route, you are only stuck in the blasted Elevatus for only 15 minutes, and find yourself at a set of large metal gates, easily a few stories tall. Using your clearance as the captain to have the doors open, you find the room to be the size of a small hangar bay. Gigantic machines of arcane purpose tower over you, and tables with various devices and crates that are stacked man tall in are haphazardly placed around the room. As you enter, a roar shakes the room, louder that the roar of a carnifex. At first you are shaken by that sound, but then you remember your rousing speech to the crew. Resolve renewed, you enter the labyrinth of science.

    >Search for the Explorator
    >Find the source of the roar
    >Press a button
    >> Captain Rhodes 10/02/10(Sat)00:16 No.12295130
    Check out the sound. Maybe you've a Genetor on board, them guys are awesome.
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)00:16 No.12295131
    That roar could be rather urgent. LETS SOLVE THE FUCK OUT OF THIS MYSTERY.
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)00:22 No.12295177

    Melta out, answering bellow,

    >> Tablet !!0fEYB5hrFn3 10/02/10(Sat)00:26 No.12295213
    To the roar! You search for the cause of the roar. Obviously, if something could be that loud, it’s probably dangerous, and shouldn’t be on your ship. Minutes pass by, the occasional roar and general growling helping you find the source. Once you do, you find you’ve never been so happy for large metal bars.

    Standing inside the largest cage you’ve ever seen, there is a ten meter bipedal reptile. Its arms are tiny, but the two heads with serrated teeth the size of your head make you think it doesn’t matter. The moment it rests its eyes on you, it goes in to a frenzy and attack the metal bars with a gusto.

    In an instant it stops and calms down. Surprised, not only by the creature but by its suddeny calm demeanor, Dolemite looks around. Behind various crates, you spy a man sized figure in red robes approaching you and the cage. Obviously your explorator, it approaches the cage and the twin headed reptile lowers its gigantic craniums to the ground up against the bars. Hands rise up out of the robes, and begin to pet the reptile, as it begins to purr contently. Without even looking at you, the robed figure says in a mechanical voice, “Ah, I see you’ve met Fluffy. I can’t wait till I can get some missile launchers attached to him. Then we’ll have some real fun.”
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)00:27 No.12295223

    "I like you, who are you?"
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)00:29 No.12295244
         File1285993756.jpg-(4 KB, 126x126, AAAAAAOHGODAAAAA.jpg)
    4 KB
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)00:30 No.12295255
    Why stop at missile launchers? Add an autocannon and some armor plating to go with it.
    >> Tablet !!0fEYB5hrFn3 10/02/10(Sat)00:33 No.12295294
    “I assume you are the new captain, yes? I saw you over the holo screen the lower priests had set up for the crew. I am the Magos Biologis H1256-J47, or Jeff. I am the highest ranking member of the Adeptus Mechanicus on this ship, and I believe you would say, your exploratory. Next to me in the cage is Fluffy. I am happy to have your affections”
    >> Captain Rhodes 10/02/10(Sat)00:35 No.12295313
    Oh fuck yeah. H1256-J47 is awesome. Everything is awesome. Get him on making some combat drugs, give him a high-five and promise him a cut of the techno-loot, and then try and pet Fluffy.
    >> That One Tau Writefag 10/02/10(Sat)00:36 No.12295328
    "Are you OK with...shady work on technology?"
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)00:36 No.12295332
    "Who's my favorite giant scaly death machine in the whole galaxy? You are, yes you are."
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)00:37 No.12295334

    "Well Jeff, three things. First, there's a Rhino in the hold from my bastard of a brother, I need someone to go over it with a fine tooth comb to make sure it's safe, then see if we can convert it into a predator command tank. Second do you know of any promising locations where we can assist in the rediscovery of lost tech. Third what are the ships capabilities for manufacturing and self repair?"
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)00:39 No.12295359
    You know, our brother might actually be a complete bro and may have spared no expense in giving us the most badass, pimped out command vehicle possible. Just throwing that out there.
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)00:41 No.12295375

    We should still have someone go over it. If he is a bro? We know how to use the cool pimped out tank.

    And I said 'see' if it turns out it's a great vehicle, then hell we'll use it.
    >> Tablet !!0fEYB5hrFn3 10/02/10(Sat)00:43 No.12295385

    High fives are quickly exchanged, and you inquire about combat drugs. The biological systems of meatbags being his specialty, he assures you that he could easily have some of his techpriests start manufacturing them. As for petting Fluffy, he’d advise against it, as the last who tried to do that gave poor Fluffy constipation for a week. Stupid guardsman should have been made of more fiber.
    As for shady, he replies he isn’t sure what you mean. Could you elaborate? He also agrees to have someone look over the rhino. As for the predator, there is nothing he can about that because it requires blueprints and instructions he does not currently have access to. He could have it switched into a command vehicle though. Repair wise, he’d have to look into it and collect a full report.
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)00:45 No.12295398
    Oh yeah, we should have it looked at. I's just that since the beginning of the thread, based on nothing more than a name and the fact that he's daddy's favorite we've been assuming that he was an evil conniving bastard out to get us.
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)00:47 No.12295415
    I'm against techno-heresy on the grounds that the AdMech tend to be VERY unforgiving on that matter. We're better off killing Xenos and Heretics for fun and profit.
    >> That One Tau Writefag 10/02/10(Sat)00:48 No.12295428
    "Y'know, mix-n-match technology, xenotech, innovation, that kind of shit? You down with that? Because if you're not down with that, I'm not either, but, y'know, a more precise macrocannon never killed anyone....'cept the guys we're shooting at."
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)00:48 No.12295432

    "When we get to Armageddon contact the local tech priests and see if we can get patterns and blueprints for heavy weapons. Overkill is the best kind of kill. As for shady technology, we're not takling about heretek, just being willing to do what the situation requires, and being willing to handle valuable artifacts of uncertain origin and purpose."
    >> Tablet !!0fEYB5hrFn3 10/02/10(Sat)00:52 No.12295461

    He considers this for a moment before saying in a way is obviously an attempt as whispering, but instead is still very loud, “It would depend. How kind would you be towards getting myself various creatures that might be deemed, ‘Too dangerous for anyone who would honestly consider trying to acquire something like that.’”
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)00:53 No.12295471
    As I consider whatever you might intend to do with them "incredibly awesome", very.
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)00:54 No.12295484

    We just need to hire enough guardsmen and put them in red flak armor.
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)00:56 No.12295504

    "Let me put it this way... You keep me and my crew supplied with top notch firepower, and make sure any particularly interesting artifacts we recover stay safe, you can keep a lobotomized Carnifex down here for all I care, and anything particularly nasty that survives contact with my men will go straight to you for examination and analysis."
    >> Tablet !!0fEYB5hrFn3 10/02/10(Sat)00:57 No.12295516

    “Excellent. I may not be that good with weapons and xeno-tech per say, but there are several tech-priests on the ship who are, and I will ensure they follow orders. Acquire for me a live carnifex, a baby void whale, and a blank, and we have a deal. Now if you will excuse me, I have SCIENCE! to do.”
    >> Tablet !!0fEYB5hrFn3 10/02/10(Sat)00:58 No.12295526

    >What does Dolemite Deadlift do next?
    >> That One Tau Writefag 10/02/10(Sat)00:58 No.12295530
    "Mr. Jeff, I look forward to a long, profitable, and extremely awesome partnership."
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)01:00 No.12295549
    Devoting some time to weapons training couldn't hurt.
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)01:00 No.12295555

    "Such things may take time, but we will do everything we can to procure them for you"

    We should talk to the Missionary then tour the ship to get a sense of it.

    Also: Arrange a meeting with the senior men. NCO's are the backbone of any organization and they seemed nonplussed with our little speech.
    >> Captain Rhodes 10/02/10(Sat)01:01 No.12295558
    Bro fist, and promptly schedule a hunt for a blank on your ship. You've got TONS of people, surely one of them is a blank.

    Just look for the one that nobody likes!
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)01:01 No.12295562
    >live Carnifex, baby void whale, and a blank
    I have no idea what he intends to do, but it will definitely be epic.
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)01:06 No.12295608
    Time to visit the ships Missionary I say.
    >> Tablet !!0fEYB5hrFn3 10/02/10(Sat)01:08 No.12295627
    To the missionary.

    A half hour of walking passes by before you find yourself at the main chapel of the ship. Working your way through the pews filled with crew attending mass, you find yourself in the living quarters of the priesthood. It doesn’t take you but a second to find the head missionary’s room, for it is easily the most extensively ornamented. Images of divinity and devotion adorn the wall adjacent to the large marble doors, and two grand pillars stand outside of it, completely unnecessary. If nothing else, you have to admit he has style.

    >What do you do?
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)01:10 No.12295647

    See if he's one of those chainblade wielding "I WILL LEAD THE CHARGE!" "MY SCARS PROVE MY WORTH!" missionaries or if he's the bad kind of missionary.
    >> Captain Rhodes 10/02/10(Sat)01:11 No.12295658
    Well first you should make the appropriate prayers and salutations to the icons- Dolemite is a pious man.

    Hopefully the Missionary is close by and will spot your devotion.
    >> Tablet !!0fEYB5hrFn3 10/02/10(Sat)01:16 No.12295724
    You knock on the doors, fully intent of discovering the character of the man who is to save the souls of your men and yourself. A minute passes and nothing. You knock again. Once more, nothing. The third time you knock louder than before. It seems your being ignored. Iriitation growing, your about to knock again when the doors open. You spy before you a man in his late twenties, with wild black hair that seems to stand on end. His tan skin and a light stubble graces his face. A pair of pants are the only thing that seem to able to stay on, for a blanket wrapped around his body struggles against gravity. In the background you can hear a woman say, “Jet, come back to bed!”

    You notice a bent Iho stick in his lips as he turns back and says, “In a moment babe, just let me answer the door.” He then turns back to you and say, “Sup. What can I do you for?”
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)01:17 No.12295734
    "Is the head missionary around?"
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)01:17 No.12295736
    >> Captain Rhodes 10/02/10(Sat)01:17 No.12295737
    Spreading the Emperor's word, huh?
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)01:18 No.12295739

    "I'm the new captain." Then just let that hang and see how he reacts.

    If he's embarrassed we should ditch the fucker. We need unrepentant balls out badasses for this crew.
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)01:20 No.12295761
    Our Seneschal is Charles Foster Ofdenson, our Astropath is a Quarian, our Explorator is a mad scientist, and our Head Missionary is a womanizer. Our crew kicks ass.
    >> Tablet !!0fEYB5hrFn3 10/02/10(Sat)01:21 No.12295767

    “That’d be me. Hope you don’t mind the lack of proper gear an’ all, I was kinda in the middle of someone and didn’ spect visitors.” A thoughtful look comes about him a for a second, but it quickly passes as he takes a swig from a bottle of amasec you notice he has in his hand. The missionary gives you a scrutinizing look for a moment before saying, “Hey, aren’t you that guy from the hola-vids? The new cap’in or something?”
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)01:24 No.12295802

    "Well your busy spreading the... Emperors holy word, so I'll be brief. I'm the new captain, I'm introducing myself around to the new crew. I basically need to know what you can do, so I don't wind up handing you a melta and telling you to smite a greater demon with the light of the Emperor when you'd be better suited to providing inspiration to the... lets say troops"
    >> Tablet !!0fEYB5hrFn3 10/02/10(Sat)01:32 No.12295871

    “Well, I’m pretty good on stage, and as you can tell I’m kind a big deal with the ladies. If you’re going for a fight, I’d rather stay out of it but if there’s no choice I’ll take a good ol fashion sniper rifle. Preferably something compact and not easily broken. Anyway, I hope I didn’t let you down or anythin’ be meetin’ you like this. I know a lotta people expect the whole “holier than thou” crap, but I don’t exactly like that stuff, and I’m not a fan of the putting my neck on the line for some glorious death in a firefight. I’ll spread the word an all, but don’t go expectin’ a freakin’ martyr. Hell the only reason I’m here is because the govner’s younger son caught me in bed with his wife-ta-be. Anyway, just get me whiskey, amasec, and plenty of Ihos and we’re golden, understand?”
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)01:34 No.12295899
    Heh, well at least you're easy to please. Yeah I understand.
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)01:36 No.12295908
    Excellent. You will make a great driver for my command tank.
    >> Tablet !!0fEYB5hrFn3 10/02/10(Sat)01:36 No.12295911
    “Excellent. Now if you’ll ‘scue me, I’ve got some to give this lady here a religious experience.” With that said, he turns and shut the door, leaving you in the hallway.

    >What do you do?
    >> Servant of the Emperor 10/02/10(Sat)01:36 No.12295918
    "You slept with my Brother's Wife to be."

    Tap your foot a few moments for impact, then burst out laughing, the real tears to your eyes almost peed myself laughing

    Regain your composure

    "I hate my brother. You'll do just fine here."
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)01:37 No.12295928

    Give him our best menacing look and response. "I'm the governor older brother..." and lighten "Good for you. I'll keep you stocked up if you keep the crew sweet and holy."
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)01:39 No.12295942
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)01:39 No.12295943

    Talk to the seneschal about keeping all the crew members happy, and trying to get our hands on a carnifex, void whale and blank.
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)01:39 No.12295955

    Time to find a blank for our badass techbuddy.
    >> Tablet !!0fEYB5hrFn3 10/02/10(Sat)01:42 No.12295978
    To the bridge!

    Well now, this has been an exhausting day. You’ve become an official Rogue Trader, kinda met the archmilitant and seneschal, and got on good terms with the explorator, missionary, astropath and the crew. Sounds like a good day all in all. You’ve got about three months to Armageddon at this rate, and you tired from all the walking.

    >What do you do?
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)01:44 No.12295990
    Find a Blank on the ship- you can do that while you're in the Warp.

    Then throw a party-dinner, man, you're a ROGUE TRADER, find some bitches to hang off your PLATINUM AND DIAMOND ENCRUSTED throne while you sip at amasec and peruse your friendship with the officers.

    And keep yourself in trim. Don't forget that.

    While I'm at it, check your Charter for any bullshit rules in it.
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)01:45 No.12295998
    Time to kick back and let the crew do everything for a while. You're the captain, you can throw back if you want.
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)01:51 No.12296060
    We need to keep an eye out for Void Whales. If we detect anything while en route to Armageddon, divert and investigate.
    >> Tablet !!0fEYB5hrFn3 10/02/10(Sat)01:53 No.12296092

    After a quick check of the scanners and a briefing of the current situation, you retire to your new study. You find it indescribably large, with books centuries old gather from around the Imperium… and several that aren’t. A large star map is built into the ceiling, adding a strange feeling of vastness and wonder to the room. The seneschal as always soon appeared from nowhere, and at your request brought you a copy of the Warrant of Trade. After seeing the piles of paper brought to your desk, you think the task of reading this thing will take a week alone, not to mention deciphering all the meanings and rules.
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)01:55 No.12296112
    We're gonna need to know this, better get to reading.
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)01:55 No.12296113
    Get the Seneschal to do some TACTICAL ACCOUNTING on it and clean this pile up. It's his job!
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)01:57 No.12296126
    >>12296113 is smarter.
    >> Tablet !!0fEYB5hrFn3 10/02/10(Sat)02:00 No.12296147
    You begin to work on the pile of paper, but find yourself slipping more and more into the realms of sleep. After reading something about not eating anything with a pH between 3.14 and 3.17, the punishment for which being defenestration, you decide it would be best for bed and head off for the most comfy bed in the world

    End Day 1
    >> Tablet !!0fEYB5hrFn3 10/02/10(Sat)02:02 No.12296173
    The Next day, you find yourself incredibly well rested, and ready for the day ahead. Struggling against the idea of staying in the most comfortable bed in the world for the rest of the day, you manage to take a relaxing bath and get dressed.

    What is ahead for the new young rogue trader today?
    >> Lt. Pierce 10/02/10(Sat)02:04 No.12296190
    Hey, uh guys? what does "unidentified ship mean"? Theres a picture, too.
    Just some big ol' tentacle thing. Any ideas? I'm at a loss.

    Oh hey look its coming towards us.
    >> DatFrigginGoomba !ikPvLvYZGU 10/02/10(Sat)02:05 No.12296196
    What kinda shit do we have to sell?
    >please forgive my ignorance, just walked in to a 100+ post thread
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)02:05 No.12296197

    Talk to the seneschal about meeting with the NCOs, our commitments to the navigator and missionary, and just talk to the seneschal, he's vital but we don't know him yet.
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)02:07 No.12296213
    We don't have anything yet. We're on our way to Armegeddon to get men and armor and become a mercenary commander.
    >> Lt. Pierce 10/02/10(Sat)02:09 No.12296234
    Me again. Seriously guys, this thing is scary. and slimey. Shouldnt we, i dont know, fire Missles? or something? its like 20 KM away...
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)02:11 No.12296248

    Let it get a little bit closer then hit it with our main gun until it turns to bits.

    Then give the bits to our explorator.
    >> Tablet !!0fEYB5hrFn3 10/02/10(Sat)02:13 No.12296258
    You turn around after looking over your new gear in the mirror to find the seneschal stadning before you. Man, that dude is creepier than the astropath sometimes. After manning up and getting over the shock of having a strange man in an amazing suit sneaking in your room, you ask him about the dinner party, he says he it will be ready for tonight, but If you desire he can have it moved up for lunch today. As for the navigator, he can arrange a meeting, though he is currently busy guiding the ship through the warp to Armageddon. If you so desire, you can go talk to him, provided you don’t distract him too much.

    >What does Dolemite Deadlift do?
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)02:16 No.12296285

    NCO != Navigator, it's Noncommissioned officers, the senior members of the enlisted crew. Our Gunnery Seargents, Chief Petty Officers, Sergeants First Class. That kind of thing.
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)02:17 No.12296291

    We should meet with them. They're as important as the officers if we want to have real influence on the ship.
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)02:17 No.12296292
    Well, I can't brain anymore and I'm going to bed. It's been fun OP, looking forward to part 2.
    >> Lt. Pierce 10/02/10(Sat)02:19 No.12296313
    Yyeah... About the main gun...
    >> Tablet !!0fEYB5hrFn3 10/02/10(Sat)02:20 No.12296321
    The NCO meeting is for later that night for dinner, unless you would like for it to happen earlier.

    Your coice?
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)02:23 No.12296345

    See if we have a target range on the ship, if not establish one and practice our marksmanship.

    Also have a chat with the seneschal about who he is, and what his particular skills are.
    >> Tablet !!0fEYB5hrFn3 10/02/10(Sat)02:33 No.12296409
    You call up the seneschal, and again he appears from nowhere. Perhaps he is crawling in the vents? His creepiness aside, you decide to ask him about his skills and past, to which he replies, “What would you like to know?”
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)02:34 No.12296419

    "What could you reasonably be expected to fight and kill by yourself, and what can you do that's above and beyond the usual seneschal skillset?"
    >> Tablet !!0fEYB5hrFn3 10/02/10(Sat)02:40 No.12296451
    “I can do many things. I have had several years training with several elite forces, all of which is confidential even to you. As for above and beyond skills, I am classical actor and can sing high gothic opera songs, though I prefer to play the organ and piano. Lacrimossa in D minor is my personal favorite.”
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)02:42 No.12296465

    "Is there any circumstance under which you will shoot me in the back of the head, and can you tell me what they are so we can avoid unpleasantness?"
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)02:43 No.12296470
    Do you know "Chants of the Pious, Volume CCCLVIII"? That's my favorite!
    >> Tablet !!0fEYB5hrFn3 10/02/10(Sat)02:43 No.12296471
    "Might I suggest reading the Warrant of Trade for such information?"
    >> DatFrigginGoomba !ikPvLvYZGU 10/02/10(Sat)02:44 No.12296473
    Well, ain't that cozy.
    >> Tablet !!0fEYB5hrFn3 10/02/10(Sat)02:45 No.12296480
    "Of course Captain Deadlift. Would you like for me to gather a choir for the dinner tonight?"
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)02:45 No.12296488

    Right... I'll get back to studying, if you can let me know if or when we have a firing range on this ship and call me so I can arrive five minutes late for the dinner.
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)02:49 No.12296512
    "Ooh, ooh, sing the one about the fate of all heretics!"
    >> Tablet !!0fEYB5hrFn3 10/02/10(Sat)02:53 No.12296542
    “Very well Captain Deadlift, I will notify when it is time for dinner. As for a firing range on the ship, the macrocannons and lance can fire up to sixty kilometers at max.”
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)02:54 No.12296546
    Personally, I prefer "The Emperor Weeps Righteous Tears for your Apostate Soul".
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)02:56 No.12296555

    I meant a practice range where crewmembers can keep their marksmanship skills up during the voyage.

    Are you always this literal?
    >> Tablet !!0fEYB5hrFn3 10/02/10(Sat)02:59 No.12296568
    “Is that a trick question?”

    An awkward silence passes, before he says, “There are several ranges where the crew may practice there fire arms. I would suggest against the use of the meltaguns and plasmagun while on the ship though, for obvious reasons.”
    >> Alpharius 10/02/10(Sat)02:59 No.12296571

    Oh snap!
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)03:03 No.12296593

    I will choose my words carefully with you in combat, or rely on pregenerated code phrases with a single exact meaning.

    Please talk to the tech preists about the feasibility of creating practice range capable of accomidating melts, plasguns and heavy lasguns, the weapons have unique firing characteristics and I want to make sure my crew can use them effectively.

    Is there anything else, in your opinion, that I am neglecting?
    >> Tablet !!0fEYB5hrFn3 10/02/10(Sat)03:09 No.12296634
    “Not that I am aware sir. Also, I while you were in the bath I received a progress report on the rhino examination. So far everything seems fine, though the Tech-priests require more time if they are to completely search over the vehicle. I would suggest you see H1256-J47, as he requested time to speak with you personally about something of dire concern.”
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)03:12 No.12296656
    Oh gdi did he lose Fluffy?
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)03:12 No.12296657

    Tell him he can meet me in my quarters at his soonest convenience. I will be studying.


    This job is so much simpler when you have someone to kill, then it's all just yell and fire your melta at whatever Xenos have that looks like a head.
    >> Tablet !!0fEYB5hrFn3 10/02/10(Sat)03:17 No.12296687
    “I’m afraid I do not know what this ‘Fluffy’ is, but he was reluctant to share any details with me than he had to. Nonetheless, I will have him informed to meet with you in your study at the soonest opportunity.” With that said, he somehow disappears in a cloud of smoke. Weird guy.

    >What do you do?
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)03:22 No.12296724

    Try to figure out if the defenestration has to happen from a window of a set height, or if you can be thrown out of one of those basement windows that's flush with the ground, because we like lemon tarts and don't want to risk it.

    More generally, study the Charter.
    >> Tablet !!0fEYB5hrFn3 10/02/10(Sat)03:25 No.12296750
    You spend the day studying the charter, learning several new rules and freedoms you know have as a Rogue Trader. Apparently, whenever you see small men with parted haircuts and ridiculous moustaches and jetpack, you have to punch them, especially if they’re time travelers. However, before you can get any deeper into the Warrant, H1256-J47 has arrived, and is waiting for you to notice.

    >What do you do?
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)03:27 No.12296762

    "If one of your pets has eaten the astropath I may be forced to reconsider our deal."
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)03:28 No.12296770

    "Why stop at missle launchers? Turn Fluffy into a living Titan!"
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)03:32 No.12296795
    See how worried he is.

    Then ask him if he lost Fluffy.
    >> Tablet !!0fEYB5hrFn3 10/02/10(Sat)03:33 No.12296804
    “What? Oh don’t worry it’s nothing of that kind of sort. I am here on a more important manned than that. You see, we lack enough energy to get to Armageddon,” he responds in a matter of fact sort of way. He raises one mechanical finger towards the star charts on the ceiling, and says, “We are currently here, in the Ultima Segmentum. To get to Armageddon would require too much power. I would suggest that along the way, we make several short jumps to refuel, as well as resupply and speed up the trip. Short jumps are usually faster than long ones I’m lead to believe.”
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)03:34 No.12296810
    "So basically we need to MONEY GET to get more fuel to make it to Armageddon to make it big as a mercenary-trader to money get to get all the bitches."
    >> Tablet !!0fEYB5hrFn3 10/02/10(Sat)03:36 No.12296827
    "Pretty much," his robotic voice synthesizer says nonchalantly.
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)03:38 No.12296848
    Well, shit. I guess We'd better get on that. Call up the cogboys in the area, see if they need anything done and go bother the Seneschal and see if he has some jobs ready (probably)
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)03:38 No.12296849

    Let's try and find the most wartorn hellholes where we can still get supplies and refuel.

    Plot a course with several of these little jumps and we'll have a decent shakedown cruise as well.
    >> Tablet !!0fEYB5hrFn3 10/02/10(Sat)03:43 No.12296886
    “As you wish,” the synthesizer says before the robed form of Jeff exits the room. Damn, who knew being a Rogue Trader would be so fucking hard?

    End Part 1
    >> Tablet !!0fEYB5hrFn3 10/02/10(Sat)03:44 No.12296892
    Alright, I'm done for the night. Any questions?
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)03:47 No.12296910

    Not really. Seems to be ticking along so far, crew of misfits, Captain whose personality ranges from bombastic berzerker to detached and clinical as the situation and personality types on 4Chan demand.

    Unless you're going to drop us in the middle of a Dark Crusade, Tyranid Hive Fleet or Necron Tomb world, I think we're good.
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)03:51 No.12296936
    Will there be xeno bitches?
    >> Anonymous 10/02/10(Sat)03:52 No.12296949
    Has this been archived yet?
    >> Tablet !!0fEYB5hrFn3 10/02/10(Sat)03:54 No.12296972
    Depends on your guys' decisions.


    Go vote it up please.

    Delete Post [File Only]
    Style [Yotsuba | Yotsuba B | Futaba | Burichan]